#(he is getting a bit cheeky isnt he this lad)

[russellius]

george terrorizing the whole paddock today

#george russell #daniel ricciardo #monaco gp 2022 #f1 #monaco #22 #*m #(he is getting a bit cheeky isnt he this lad) #😌 #mon22

[lfc21]

Following after Daddy

Summer was the best time for laughs, smiles, memories and a huge amount of sun burn. Family time seemed to bloom just like the flowers in your garden during the hot months. These where the best months - hair gets lighter, water gets warmer, drinks get colder, music gets louder and life gets better, all under one roof. You and kostas had gone through some amazing memories but days under your forever home with family and friends couldn't ever loose its magic.

Today you had all decided to spend the hottest day of the year at yours and Kostas's house. You loved days like these as they held some of the most amazing and unforgettable memories. Kostas knew how much you loved summer days with him as summer was the season your love together starter. They where exciting yet very messy, even to the point with no return.

"Y/n these drinks are just amazing" Julia said to you with a grin as she sat herself down next to you on the grey garden furniture. You and Julia had a love like sisters and it only made it easier as both of your husbands where practically joint at the hip.

"Careful you don't want to get drunk to quick" you said with a laugh as you slapped her leg softly as you both laughed together. The sun was intensely dancing on everyone backs causing a glow to perfectly sit on everyone's faces.

"M-mummy" your little boy sturted out as he sat next to the both of you with a cheeky smile. You carefully took your mini kostas on your knee and smiled to him causing his need of attention to become stronger. You where sure you had birthed another kostas, he was completely and utterly identical towards his father.

"Isnt he so much like kostas" Julia admitted as she held her hand out for Alecs small palm causing a high giggle to escape.

"Oh I know I was hoping for my child to look a little bit like me" you said with a laugh as you kissed his light blonde hair with a smile.

"There's always next time" she replied back with a wink as kostas and thiago quickly rushed themselves over clearly wanting abit more attention from their wives as a pose to there teammates on the grass.

"Hello you three" kostas's greek accent let out as he came crashing down next to you and planting a soft kiss on your forehead. Kostas's arm rapped protectively around your small shoulders as he let the warm sun sit on his body.

"Do you actually want to be anymore sweaty?" You asked with a laugh as you realised just how much sweat he had let out by playing football in the heat. You couldn't lie he actually looked beautiful with the warm glow to his face but there was apart of you that couldn't understand why he would want to ruin all of his clothes for the whole day ahead.

"I can get more sweaty if you want" he said back with a cheeky attitude laced through his english. His body was sat at a slant next to you as his hand roamed aimlessly through your long hair.

"I'd rather you not babe" you mumbled on his lips as you planted delicate kisses on his soft mouth. His hand came to the back of your head as his other was taken over by alecs small fingers trying to eat them.

"What do you want babe?" Kostas asked with a laugh clearly due to your new change of attitude at how much you wanted him during a party.

"Hmmm im not sure" you dumbly giggled as your eyes rested on your small child on your knee.

"Ohhhhhh I see yeah?" Kostas said trying to find out if his suspicion was infact correct. You simply nodded at his words as you wanted to keep the conversation short and sweet as a chat about kids shouldn't really be discussed at a summer party. "I'm just so irresistible" he added with a laugh as he stood his tall frame up and picked up his mini version of himself.

"Daddy" Alec shouted as his hands came straight for kostas's hair trying to explore anything on his head.

"Thanks lad" kostas mumbled with a laugh as he tried to pull the small hands from off his blonde locks. You watched the pair wonder off infront of you towards virgil with his children. Everyday you often wondered what it would be like with another baby but kostas was hard enough let alone with another 2 babies.

"Will Alec be starting on Tuesday for us?" James asked from the grass with a laugh as he watched the small boy latch onto his father's hands whilst carefully trying to walk with his support of his older version. He was obsessed with being around his dad's teammates when they where all playing football.

"I hope not" you replied back with a laugh as you took a long sip of your drink. This was the most perfect day, just sun and amazing people. Thiago and Julia had descended to the kitchen to start getting things ready for the bbq, leaving you to watch your husband and son.

"Tsimi" Trent shouted as he kicked the ball over to kostas, Alec sat himself down on the grass admiring the ball under his dad's feet. Kostas kicked the ball until he started dribbling it. Alecs eyes lit up at his father running with the white ball, his small hands pushed himself from his seat on the grass before he stood himself up just by himself until his small legs slowly carried himself a few steps infront.

"Kostas!" You shouted as you stood up from your seat excitedly as your husbands head snapped right towards you. Kostas's eyes fell onto his son taking small baby steps over to him until he gently sat himself back down on the grass.

"Did he just-" Jordans wife asked as she stood behind you in complete admiration.

"Y-yeah" you said in pure disbelief at what your eyes had shown you.

"Come on do it again lad" kostas said as he stood infront of his son with the ball in his hands which was once on the floor. James stood behind your small boy and pulled him up whilst he let him steady himself on the freshly cut grass.

"Maybe you need to run again" virgil suggested with a wide smile. Kostas took the ball and placed it under his foot as he looked directly at his little him.

"You ready?" Kostas asked with a laugh until he noticed maui charging out of the kitchen. "Babe get maui" he added with a laugh as he knew just how playfull maui could be. You grabbed your dog with a smile as you both watched the lads work there magic on the small boy. Kostas ran with the ball ever so slowly but enough to make Alec realise, his small feet took one step infront of each other with a delicate pattern.

"Daddy" Alec shouted with a giggle as he tried to reach for his dad just a few steps infront of him, he finally reached kostas as he gripped onto his leg with a smile.

"You did it!" Kostas shouted as he picked him up and swung him onto his wide shoulders. You made your way over to the pair with a smile.

"Where you following after Daddy?" You cooed as your hand was gripped by his as he looked at you in awe. Kostas's eyes where resting on the pair of you and his heart doubled at the softness of the moment.

"I want another" kostas admitted to you.

"What?" You quickly asked as those words came to you as quite a shock.

"I want another baby" kostas suggested again with a smile. His eyes where on yours, locked with each others with nothing but love and affection. You simply kissed his soft lips giving him the complete answer he needed.

Thank you to @chloereddy who requested this from my request title list. I really hope you enjoyed reading this, please leave feedback and comments as they are greatly appreciated. @prettylittletrent @cornertakenquicklyyyy @trentsko @trentshoe @trentalexanderarnold @robbo38 @robbothegoat @kostasstsimikass @chelseamount @chloereddy @hnrfc @tsimikas2l @avenirdelight @blueathens @jordanhendersunshine @mrs-henderson @thatonesexycancerian @hendersons1truelover @nyctophilic0vitnir @peekapeaches @tsimikxs @tsimikostas @trentalexarnofan @leddows @moneymasnn @superkittywonderland @virgilvandxjk @virgilvandickmedown

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#lfc imagines #lfc masterlist #liverpool imagines #lfc imagine #england fc imagines #england x reader #england team imagine #footballer x reader #footballer imagines #footballers #kostas tsimikas x y/n #kostas tsimikas x reader #kostas tsimikas imagine #kostas tsimikas imagines #konstantinos tsimikas #lfc x reader #liverpool

[stuff-i-like-to-share]

Fanfics i would Love to read but not talented enough to write them myself...

.... fanfics... or even better if that was actual scenes in season 4!

1. Gilbert seating on the train writing a draft of his letter to Anne, getting emotional, passionate not noticing old lad seating next to him with his wife looking at eachother smiling at young love. Telling him a short story of their love and how they have been separated and how they would suprise eachother by visiting every now and then.

2. Anne talking to Diana and deciding not to tell anyone about her and Gilbert before she actually speak with him... which later on will pay of in girls faces when they see them kissing lol

3. Anne receiving her first letter from Gilbert and being over the moon, sending her own letter straight away and meeting young intelligent boy at the post office which turnes out is at queens aswel.

4. Gilbert and Anne meeting new people, having their lessons and studies and writing little notes to add their letters, collecting little flowers, making it very personal.

5. Gilbert being jealous over this new boy which Anne mentioned in 3 letters already. Doing extra work to finish his studies few days earlier to travel to Charlottetown and see Anne.

6. All girls seating outside, learning, talking romance, Anne and Diana giving eachother side looks because nobody knows about Gilbert yet... Anne getting very emotional she havent seen Gilbert in 2months while Ruby talking about daily walks with Moody.. her eyes tear up, girls are like ohh r you ok Anne when one of them look up from their blanket and bw like: oh, Gilbert whatever you doing here...

Anne jumped up straight into his arms, he swings her around in a massive hug, then they about to kiss, tios of their lips about to touch when Diananotice Girls faces and goes like: uhmm

Gilbert and Anne look at all the suprised girls, get a bit shy, Gilbert let's Anne out of his tight hug and they stand there looking at eachother for short while, Gilbert is like: ladies... if you dont mind I would like to steal Anne for a... looks at Anne not knowing what to say, but she finish his sentence for him: tea! There's certain matters we need to discuss with Gil... with Mr. Blythe... she says while looking at Gilbert's dreamy eyes... Girls being so confused and shocked by whole situation just nods while they walk out through back gate.

7. The moment they are away enough from girls and the boarding house Gilbert swing Anne in the air again with the cutest smile, she laughs, then they step to the side of little quiet road and he kiss like theres no tomorrow...

Talk about their studies... then walk past tea house and Gilbert is like, oh we are here and Anne look at him with a cheeky smile... shes like oh we are not really going to have a tea are we.. its dull and full of boring people.. Gilbert laughs at memory of being awkward with Winfred at one of them tea houses.

Anne takes Gilbert to one of her favourite parks, they walk by the water.. theres a small patch of grass surrounded by trees, Sun sneaking through the branches, they are finally alone and kissing and cuddling... they sat on the grass talking, laughing, simply staring into eachothers eyes... they lie down cloud gazing playing with each hands, hair...

8. Gilbert walking Anne back to her house, talking about leaving to Avonlea and telling everyone, both but stressed about their families reaction... they stop by the gate to avoid Anne getting kn trouble, hold eachothers hands. Gilbert's is like: so... we are... courting? Its official! Anne gives him a shy smile: I still cant belive it... Gilbert gives her a soft kiss and tells her he will come and see her at queens next day so the can travel together back to Avonlea.

9. Anne back to her room where she is immediately flooded by questions from all the girls... You kissed him, he kissed you in public, oh that's nothing like Gilbert we knows.. Anne stands there waiting for them to calm down and simply just say: I'm in love with Gilbert Blythe for a while now, and what I recently been informed about, hes been (she srops realising he never actually said he loves her...) ... having feeling for me aswel, for a while... we will be seeing our families tomorrow as we are offering courting.. girls get all hyped, asking questions if hes a good kisser Ruby throws a little comment that she actually always was confused when she thought hes looking at her but it was more like he was staring at Anne and that shes happy for her...

(Sorry... long list... I didint realised km so needy and desperate for fanfics 🙈)

10. All Anne can think if at school is fact that she is going to see Gilbert very soon and they will travel together back home...

She bumped into her friend, Roy which btw also have feeling for her and jokingly often admits he thinks Anne's is the most beautiful girl at queens etc... which Anne is ignoring as all she thinks of Gilbert and studies.

They walk out of school together, Roy lean and whisper somwthkng into Anne's ear, she laughs and notice Gilbert, wave at him, theyvwalk towards eachother. Gilbert's jaw is pulsing, hes jealous. Anne introduces them to each other and Gilbert have a little flashback to when he was introducing Winnie to Anne and disint know how to refer to Winfred, Anne did almost the same thing as it's actually first time she have to introduce Gilbert as her bou. Boys shake their hands bit stronger than they should, Anne says goodbye to Roy and her friends, Gilbert then offers her his arm to hold on to while looking at Roy standing and watching them walk away.

11. Gilbert is bit confused and worried, he isnt talking much on the way back, Anne is so excited shes doing most of the talking.. she noticed Gilbert acting wierd and asks, he then have tiny emotional tantrum and tells her he doesnt like the way this Roy guy is into her... she laughs and tells him theres nothing there, beside the only person she cares about... she ... loves its Gilbert.. he smiles, hold her hand... she then get a bit worried because its been 3 times when she said it out loud she loves him and Gilbert didint say it back.

12. They decided to invite Gilbert's family for dinner to Green Gables and then tell them together so when they get out of the train and see Matthew they being careful not to look to excited. Matthew offer Gilbert a ride back home and noticed little looks between Anne and Gilbert.

13. The dinner ready, Gilbert, Bash and Deli arrives at Green Gables, all the way Bash was giving Gilbert side looks with a cheeky smile and asking what so important they have to go to dinner tonight and not some other day... Gilbert just smiles and says its was Anne's idea on their way back from train station.. Marila opens the door calling for Matthew and Anne..

Anne come downstairs, Gilbert gets up with the most hearty eyes, theyblook at eachother for a while, and everyone e in the room glance at Anne then Gilbert, Marila and Bash look at eachother with a smile, Matthew looks a little bit concerned...

14. Anne stand in the middle of the room, Gilbert walks to her with a smile, turn around and stand by her side, they look at each other with a shy smile, he then pick up Anne's hand and while holding it dearly in his both hands he say something like: Marila, Matthew, Sebastian... Delphine (with a little smile as she giggle at he uncle)

We have some news, I mean... I would like to ask your permission first, ofcourse... uhmm

I would like to ask your permission to court with Anne... uhm... we recently discovered we both... have feelings for eachother... (Anne give him a concerned side look as again he wont say he loves her)

I needs to know if you Marila and Mathew gives us your... blessing..

They look at each other, Marila stands up, walked to them, hold their hands with tears in her eyes saying that shes so happy for them and their happiness and love is what matters... Bash alsongwts up and hug Gilbert with biggest smile saying he knew it and that he is so happy for them.. Anne then looks at Matthew which looks a bit sad.. gilbert then says: Matthew?

And hes like: if Anne's happy I am aswel, gets up and shakes Gilbert's hand, Anne hugs him.

15. They all seating alntalking, laughingnover the dinner table, Anne playing with Deli and Gilbert joining her, Matthew and Marila getting emotional as this is another big step towards losing their precious Anne.

16. Bash joking around, quietly saying to Marila about them behaving like perfect parents. Matthew then walking out but emotional.. Both Anne and Gilbert looking at eachother, Anne wanted Ringo but Gilbert telling her to stay and walking out behind Matthew. Then having a heartwarming conversation, telling Matthew how much he cares for Anne.

17. Anne kissing Gilbert goodbye and Bash seeing it, making comments about it on their way back home.

18. Anne and Gilbert going for walk... Gilbert being cheeky and keep touching Anne's hands, hair, face... talking about feeling when Anne suddenly tear up and tells him she wants to go back home, take a turn thru the woods, Gilbert all confused ran after her asking what's wrong, She then have a little go at him that shes scared he dowsnt really love her because it's been months and he never actually said he loves her... he then loom into her eyes, hold her face in his hands and tells her: I am in love with you Anne, my Anne with an e, I'm in love with you since i remember, it's always been you Anne...

He kiss her then and after the kiss shes all like: but why dont you say it..

He looked at her with sad eyes: I'm afraid of losing you Anne, most of people I ever loved are gone... I cant lose you Anne, I... love you to much, it hurts just thinking about losing you...

He seats on fallen tree, tell her a story of his mothers death while giving him birth, of his brothers dieing one after another to illness... then his father.. and dear Mary... he opens up and cry while she listens and hold his hand.

She then tells him how much sorry she is for being selfish and forcing him to say it, but he wont mind as it's been a while since he could open up like this and it feels so right to talk to his Anne.

They hug and talk about how Mary would be happy for them, Anne recalls his father and fact he said he herd alot about her and Gilbert getting all shy saying he told him alot abt Anne because even then he would not stop caring about her, back then he wasnt sure what it was, it was pulling him towards Anne, only recently he realised it's always been love...

Then they say it together and laugh...

19. As they are walking out of the forest Anne tripped and fall into a ditch, Gilbert laughs recalling the day Marila was talking about Anne in the ditch, asking her if that's how her adventures looks like and as shes a bit upset with him at first she also laughs saying he is her biggest adventure now...

20. Then as he helps her out, they stand and laughs, he gives her a soft kiss, Rachel Lynde watches it from nearby as she was just walking back from ms. Stacy's...

All shocked she rushed to Green Gables to talk to Marila... Markla gives he a little talk about being young and in love and maybe if she would listen to her heart she would be married now... as they talk Anne and Gilbert walks into the kitchen laughing... they both look ar Rachel bit scared of her comments.. but she gaze at Marile for short while thinking, then she gets up, walkes to them and congratulate them with a little cheeky comment about kissing...

21. They are back to their schools, emotional and full of love goodbyes, girls sneakily watching them and giggling...

22. Series of letters, Roy finding one of Anne's letters she left in one of her books he borrowed... then making a declaration.. Anne feeling overwhelmed as she does like Roy alot and woildnt want to ruin their friendship... bit of an argument between Anne and Gilbert, Roy trying to kiss her and she slapping his face...

23. Christmas back in Avonlea, together one big happy family... Anne and Gilbert sneaking out at night to spend time together... kissing and rolling in the barn...

24. Anne having a flashback from orphanage and Gilbert asking what's wrong, atvfitstvshe doesn't want to tell him but one night they talk and she opens up and tells him everything, about being bullied and treated like trash... about her imagination helping her get trough... about how broken she always felt and never couldn't even imagine being loved, and having so many loving people in her life... she would tell him about how worried she was her parents have her away because they disint love her as she was an ugly redheaded baby... Gilbert then kisses her single messy braid and tells her how much he loves her red hair and how much he Hope's their children will have same hair as her.. she then freaks out a little because she never actually thought about children and the way Gilbert talks it sounds so natural for him... she then look at him with a smile: out babies?

And gilbert is like: oh gosh, I I didint meant to scare you... but.. dont you think about... our future Anne? Coz I do.. alot he admits with a bit shy face..

She then say she only imagine their future together but she never actually thought about children... he get a bit stressed but then she adds that now he mentioned it, she also is looking forward to having a child, maybe two... they laugh and joke about it a little ... Bash and Ms. Stacy get married which course outbreak but after several years of secretly meeting and falling more in love they decided to go against the system. She ends up losing her job as a teacher but she writes books and articles to newspapers instead while pregnant with their first child. She also moves in with Bash his mother and Deli as Gilbert told Bash that after school he wont be living with them anymore. Elijah moves out as he met lovely girl himself, got married and lives outside Charlottetown, visiting them often and always helping with the harvest.

25. New years eve, theres a ball, dancing, beautiful scenes of them having fun together... Gilbert taking Anne back to green Gables.. he turn towards the cliffs... they walk together to the cliffs end, stand there looking into stars, he then drop on his knee, holding a ring, a beautiful ring and ask her to marry him, which she obviously say yes to.

26. Time skip with a bit of letters between them and their lives at school etc... suprised visits and going back home..

Matthew having another heart attack, being bed stuck, Jerry rushing to get a doctor but it's to far and they wouldn't make it, Matthew dieing with Anne and Marila by his bed... Gilbert coming to Avonlea back from his practice next day, Bash tells him what happened,bhe rush to Green Gables and Fojnd Anne in awful state.. Jerry explain to him he went to fetch the doctor from other town but it was to late... he apologise to Anne for not being here, she tells him it's not his fault... but he feels responsible for not being close to his family... he decides to come back and be a town doctor after all his school and practice is finished...

28. Anne after getting approval from mrs lacroix (stacy) applied and got the job as a teacher in Avonlea school, helping Marila as shes still very unstable after losing Matthew.

29. Then beautiful wedding in Avonlea... Marila crying.. Anne missing Matthew dearly.. lots of memories, laughs and dancing...

30. When Anne got the job as a teacher she also got the house ms Stacy useto lived in, she decided to stay at green Gables until theh get married but she got the house already for them week before the wedding.

They get back home, to their very own home, Anne is so happy it's in the woods as she always felt special connection to nature...

They have wonderful night and sweet love making, both happy in eachothers arms, enjoying the rest of their life together...

Gilbert suggest to Anne that she could write a book same as ms Stacy which she starts very next day...

31. Another skip in time... Anne giving birth, Gilbert doing his best, baby is breached, hes scared of losing Anne, of losing them both. Marila is there aswel... Baby is finally born but it isnt crying... Gilbert pass the baby to Marila and take care of Anne... she walks out quickly to check on the baby as therws still not a single cry in the house, Anne is bleeding alot, but asking for her baby... he walked in to the kitchen Marila standing there crying, he take baby if her hands and wrap aswel, their very first baby, product of their undying love didint survive the labour... he hugged his child pressing him to his chest, kissed his head... he then walked back to Anne's room... Marilenherd loud moan and deep desperate cry, shes crying herself... Gilbert asked if Anne wants to say her goodbyes. She said yes and hold her baby in her arms crying... they gold a little funeral two days after... Anne is devastated... her and Gilbert having a breakdown together crying...

32. Two years later Gilbert find himself worrying for his wife's life once agin... it was hard for them to decide tontryvfor another baby... Anne wanted it and now Gilbert is scared to death about his Anne and baby to come. Luckily this time everything went smoothly with mo single complication, baby cries and they both hold it together crying of happiness.

Then years later Anne writing another book, while their children are playing together outside of green Gables... Marilas dying wish was for Anne ro have Green Gables, it was her home and she wanted Anne and her family to live happy life in there...

Gilbert is backnfeom work, they seat on the porch, drinking tea, looking at eachother with hearty eyes, talking about their achievements kids keep running up to them, hugging and kissing them. They smile, stand up watching their 6 children being cheeky.

I love you Carrots...

I love you to Gil...

Then they kiss with even more passion than ever...

The end...

Gosh that possibly the longest post I ever wrote... when I started I had only abt 15 ideas... but as I wrote more and more... even more ideas came to my head... sorry for a long bit messy read... just wanted to share some of things that kept me awake since we found out about s4 being cancelled...

Anyway.... hope you enjoyed it... sorry for any mistakes... will proofread tomorrows as today its been a while since I started writing this...

#anne shirley #anne of green gables #anne #anne with an e fic #anne with an e #anne x gilbert #anne with an e s3 #anne with an e season 3 #anne with an e spoilers #awae edit #awae spoilers #awae #awaeedit #awae fanfic #awae fandom #awae fic #awae ff

[smallgayblanket]

New/revised/whatever- List of stuff

Egos (Marks/Jacks) that I have written for or at least actually have thought about HCS/other universes for:  (Just some brief rambles about them, please don't hesitate to ask about them :3)

  -Anti,   Two takes really, I like him soft, like him mean, hes just fun to write, plenty of different ways to spin why he acts out, what he is and all that. My current fav way to portray him is a missing piece of Seans soul, which means hes unstable as a ‘person’ (cough, not really a human but not, not human either.)  And how he has static filled blue eyes but usually hides them with the scary emerald green...

-Jameson,  I will always stand by this kinda universe i created with a friend aages ao that Shawn took away Jamesons voice when being puppeteered by an awful ink creature that shares his body.  Giving Jameson a lovely fear of knives, some scars, and some very damaged vocals..

-Crank, Oh my fucking boi, a near dead human spliced with a bunch of robot parts..human skin tangled with wires and a heart incased in metal..hes a right mess, a voice in his head that makes him feel all sorts of bad.. He tries his best..he cries oil,  I hardly get to write  him but I love him.

-Blank, another big fav oi, black hollow eyes..a tendency to faint... My Hc involves him having been in an accident that almost killed him, leaving him with a very rare heart condition. He also has an aura which..kinda ties into him having a few abilities and stuff. 

-Nes.. He started off as my own kinda Ethan ego, basically Ethan who was mistreated and really lost his marbles..hes great for the real twisted messed up kinda stuff, so dependant on others, a minor murderer, and has been eyed off by a certain ice cream driver for quite some time...

-Were eth,  Okay granted this was literally just kinda an idea that..Eth became a were wolf boi, fangs, tail, ears. Hes just a fun lil pupper

-Eden. Succubus Ethan basically, but well, he again kinda turned into his own thing separate from Ethan. He's got a tail and wings, and hes a lovely lithe thing. He doesnt dare do things without consent, just gets a bit touchy-feely when hes gone without any energy for too long. Very wide stunning saphire eyes. 

- Jackie  Oh my lad..Buff, trans, adorable, sweet. I always love tinkering around with how/what powers he has tbh..and like- I’ve always had the hc that his eyes are lilac?? or gold. Depending on things.. and he works either at a comic book store, a gym, or at the counter of a gas station. Gives the best hugs. Also I love AUS where hes a phoniex because of uhm?? Big fucking red wings??? YES.

-Hen, Getting his accent right is tough but other than that I love writing about the tired doctor living off coffee and ignoring himself in favor of others. 

-Chase The fucking best dad, sunshine lad. Running a vlogging channel and doing his best while combatting depression..I hc him to have chronic fatigue so he has to push himself extra hard. but He does well in trying to get better and look after himself and only slips up like any other helpless human. Very fun to write. 

- Robbie.   Sof.t zombie lad. Drown in a sweater. Stutters and is v quiet. Slow with speech. Struggles to see sometimes. Loves soft textures.Loves attention. Overall soft fucking lad.

-KOTS, To mean known as Simon. Actually v smart, big brain, very scattered n shy and nervous and squirrelish. Loves books n plants, loves nature. Red is his best colour. Warm sweaters and nuzzling and cuddling up. I always get torn between him being a hybrid of human/squirrel or just a lovely soft guy. 

-Yan ! My fem nb/trans gal! They’ll kick ass with their katana, have the hots for Bim, and looove Japanese culture and stuff. Very adorable. Loves pink. 10/10 love to write. 

-Technically I do have a muse for Mark, or..idea? I’m thinking about shoving it into my own oc/thing..but basically he got tortured n abused by Authy so hes not quite like the real life markimoo..just a nervous mess whose dealing with his traumas..

-Bing, Skater lad, yellow/orange eyes, sunflower vibes. Tries his best, clumsy as fuck, great for a laugh when hes not cowering under google. 

-Edward iplier,  Gah my doctor lad.. I have a hc that he Lost arm. In fire..or by dark n wilf.  He has heterochromia too!! One cho ceye one blue one. He is a fucking nerd (Minor adhd lets be honest) He fucking loves space and science and space/science related lights. He has a bat plus with spacey wings. He likes reading, likes being clean and is quite a quiet indulger in food which has left him with a big of a softer figure. Super gentle nature..nothing like the arrogant portrayal we got in some videos. 

-Angus   I love this man!!! Part Aussie, part irish, a whole lot of gruff old dad with a soft spot for nice people and animals, has his own big place, next to a large ass forest. Loads of scars. Loves boots and cameo coloured clothing. A lovely guy when you get past the rough edges. 

Aand onto all my ocs as of writing this (cause you name well know I be writing new ones like..all the time.) 

--------------------

OC’S (My original characters!)

-Jessy, Cowboy-   Choker with gold bell. Lil ears/horns. Spots. Shy but sweet. Hands and feet different colour to rest of skin. Kinda  fur ish feeling rather then just straight-up skin.  Pear shaped figure. Shy lad. Likes to take lots of naps, anxious easily but a big people pleaser too. 

-Ailan and Keros. Moth n butterfly boi.  (Literally just made up with a friend, just a random soft pair of lads tbh nothing too fleshed or spesh)

- Louie - Followed by a dark being/creature/spirit... Yet to determine what else about him, but hes got brown hair, pointed ears and looks lovely in green.

-Quinton  A Hybrid of Demon and Angel otherwise called a Guardian. Quirky, Pan as shit, great dress sense. Extremely calm. Can see auras. Lovely black feathered wings. Bright blue hair.  Kind smile. Works at a little coffee shop in his spare time.

-Ori  Very pure angel boy, previously owned and not very well treated by a god, came crashing down to earth with no memories but his wings intact. Some help him. 

-Lumi  Ghost boy! Died years ago under awful circumstances..now lingers around on earth, sometimes meeting humans who happen to be able to feel or see his presence, he has the ability to make himself solid for short periods of time. 

- Lucio Witchy..dragon soul something or other- Deaf.Paralyzed? In the arms??They might use alot of energy trying to hover around instead of having to use a chair..(I mean how many witches do you see with chairs??).. Although they could not have use of their arms instead, like..paralyzed from the shoulder down- they still have them but theyre effectively useless and easily sore.. (which might make magic really hard, cause theyd have to master it again without their hand gestures.)

- Eztli, Bit of a prick. Basically got cursed to have really weird blood that replished and rejuvinated too fast/too much by a witch he angered. So he turned the curse into a good thing and basically goes out offering himself as a human blood bag for vamps willing to pay in info, items, cash or uh..other services..  

- Gallio Photographer, has hypocalcemia. Haven't really done much else with him tbh.

-Aomi Warlock/witch in training. Downright awful at it. Young and lives in a nice lil cottage outside of the village he was abandoned in.

- Lucas A moonstone gem perma-fusion, he kinda has SPD/DID but he doesn't, cause..hes two gems that became one but not fully. Leaving him to be a bit of a mess and not as strong as other moonstones. 

- Kiyan. A little assistant android!! Created to assist, he can make portals!, He works at a post office. Hes under surveillance by the company that made him and isnt yet aware of many human customs/emotions.. 

- Alex  A very confused, overly optimist Alien who doesn’t know what they are. Come from the planet Eutychia, 4'3. They fucking glow. You know  Kilowatt from space chimps? think that. But hair n freckles and more human and just as  bubbly and energetic. 

-Locus  Mer/Fish boi!  Transparent fins, glowy patches, plays harp + loves music.

-Lir  A Tiny Octopus/Human hybrid lad. Makes little burble and trill noises. Quite harmless. Needs a home. 

Benji (Strawberry shortcake boi- Cursed tape /bandages. Demi half god.? One eye. Uses notes. To communicate but also sign. Really. Good sweets maker)

 Small bois (A collection of tinys because G/T is fucking great okay?)

- Tobias. Literally Made of hair gel. cleary, adorable, aaand Eats soap..amoung other non food items he probably should not ingest but does..

- Hinto  Guy made of foam slime. Very chill n laid back.

- Glowstick bubs. (Alo/aloke -  Green and blue  +  Siro - Yellow n pink.  + Mavi (Vi) Red and silver. + Roxy (Ro) - Orange and  purple )  They’re a cross between glowsticks and lava lamps and its epic- asides the fact they have like.half a brain cell each. Lots of sleeping n lazign around.

- Theo  A tiny ink creature.  A clever little lad, who likes to drawn and write n paint in ink and leave cheeky little black splotches everywhere. A very good writer companion tho. 

- JellyBubs! A collection of tiny sentient jelly babies, hungry lads will raid your cupboards. 

-Miel A tiny little bee boy! Loves flowers <3 

Apocolyse Squad:

The planet Keres,  Left uninhabitable after the invasion that ruined the air and killed almost the entire race.

Sameal o’Ceirin (Being of smoke- partly blind.)

Mallory Thomas (Part cat. Vet, partner to Sam who ends up dying in the canon of their story)

Hamrish Benat  (Hayden. 4 eyes, soft tongue. PTSD. extra tiny heart in wrist. Quite fem/soft. Likes soap cutting vids and stuffed toys/teddies.)

Joshua who cares (An asshole. Staight up. He dies. Fuck him. He sucks ass.)

Andy peters (Strong, kind. Kinda like Tyler shied. Big, tol, but actually pretty soft.)

Adrian  Géarán  (Tail, fire abilities, likes to make little robots. Very weak n has a couple of disabilities that leave him tired n such, which aint great for his esteem or his team when the apoc hits.)

--

Wyatt ???? ?????????????????

Pace- Nerdy. Finds a cat. Observer for the aliens. Is immune to black goop. 

Four - buff. Scary. Deadly. 

Apocolypse Squad Part 2  Small lads who dont derese to be in danger: 

  -Apep, Naga boi  Legs mutate into a cool tail. Hisses, fangs. Adorable loves the sun. bout 20 years old. 

Chris. Camp leader! Biig dad type, redhead, buff, likes gardening and camping, very outdoorsy. Little awkward but great.

Small child Talise- nickname tails? ..   Blind and slightly traumatized by the car crash that killed his mother and ended up with glass in his eyes, very sensitive to noise n textures.     Ends up mutating tails.  6 v young n smol  blocks n colourin

Shirin Parvis. Crystal boi .. trained solider/ royalty.  Tried to warn people before the apoc hit and failed. Now tries to protect the small group of surviors he stumpbles across. 

 Zephaniah, mutation turns him into a  Chameleon basically, just.. a human one. He  Prefers Zeph. Big gamey Nerd-  gets a pet gecko.  16. Quiet. Loves Lazar skirmish and lazers. 

Moyachi, Cactus boi!! Plant bab. Loves water and has clear/lime green tinted aloe/herbal helpful blood. Spikes up at defense from bad people 18/ 19   likes drawing. Pretty grumpy and needs a break.

Colin, nicknames: Coco,  Lady bug lad, who is baby trans  mutation resulted in a weird Red/Orange skin condition basically.  Can predict weather v accurately.       Ballet/dance, 14   Likes cooking. 

Hotaru , Firefly bby  - Glowy bub with antenna,  possibly mutates wings.. Sassy and tired. Turns nocturnal as the apoc progressed. Also becomes Colins first love <3

Zeno  A Siren of sorts.  DC/ hip hopper/   Lost his arm in apoc.  He loooves music alot. Very purple aesthetic and checkerboards.

Liren Pichi, deaf peaches n cream aesthetic boi- Nickname Pichi.  He is alone during the apoc, sneaks aboard and ship and goes missing..

Neighbours AU:

They all live on the homeworld, Ermioni.

Lesbabs:

Blake Aglaia  A human with a gift of being able to put emotions into glass balls.. Red head, quite fem, but gay, sweet, but not mousy. 

Lynx ?? An alien and human, the alien somewhat resides inside its host but they coexist. Sometimes goes feral.  Alien half likes to go by Perse  (Percy)  They have cool looking saliva- viens that run down their arms that are pretty cool- sharper nails/claws. Tendrils. Large ol mouth. Lots of pointy ass teef. Lynx likes to train,go to gym, and kick ass. Big ass butch energy.

Demon fam:

Hyacinth  A six-armed demon with serious parent energy. Big gardener, his body grows flowers depending on his moods/strength of emotions. Purple neck length hair. Great at comfort and cooking. 

Rhys  A Demon with a great curiosity about humans has a sibling, Feri.  Rhys is a big nerd, but very hard to get to know. Not great with emotions, comes across a tad distant and cold without always meaning too. Loves candles and lots of autumn aesthetic. 

Anthos, AKa Ant. Rhys and Hy’s accidentally created/summoned a toddler.. and hes fucking adorable. 

Vato - V   Hy has another bub later on who's more purpley blue with red curled horns and 4 arms.. No tail.. 4 eyes. V cute and inquisitive. Less noisy and wreckless than Ant. 

Roommates:

Douglas Connelly  A regular chubby human bean! Learning to become a chef. He loves food, loves cooking and also loves dancing. Hes a big guy, big cudddler, but a little shy and akward at times. 

Donovan Amores  Real fricking cool and smokin hot Bartender with a love for dogs. Dougs roommate. Has glowing fuckin orbs- donates his heart to a fucking god is smooth as fuck, background heavily Spanish, moved when young.

Haris Alaksim Real name (lost in translation, Huitzilopochtli God of sun and war) ) - A god whom Dono is very close with and donates his heart two one every 3 years during the day of the highest sun. He is a god / Mouros.    Donovan refers to him as “Dios gentil”  or “ Viejo colibrí sabio”   (“El viejo colibrí sabio es un dios gentil” (The old wise hummingbird is a gentle god.)

Donovans Family

Rem (Looks after magical creatures- Cane is from Haris)

Oscar  (Not sure what trinket or power but He’s just a casual store worker w/ good arms. Surprisingly good with knives- perhaps has one from Haris?)

Nicole  (His only sister Makes clothes..possibly got some ability to do with seasons..?  Perhaps earrings or a bracelet from Haris)

Javi  (Makes jam, cute boy, wears cloaks. Maybe has a cute little jar necklace or magic jar??)

Luca (Trans bookkeeper- Talks to Haris most often and likes to ask questions..Has precious books...Possibly a special pen..) 

Forest bois!!

Cypress The soul of the forest - Mentor of Rem. Very calm, very wise. Kinda like master oogway type. 

Unicorn boi, Hes rare, missing a chunk of his horn. Dont hurt him. He doesnt even have a name.

Fyn. Mushroom boy. Protects a gate. Lost his twin during a human-caused fire. Very mad about it. 

Fie. Bat boy. Loves fruit. 

Moh. Fairy/incubus hybrid.  

Tucker. Bunny boi, Best friends with Ainsley. Got some like, punk vibes about him, piercings n such. Not as soft as one would expect but still nice at heart.

Ainsley. Fawn boi, clums, shy, round glasses,  Looks smart but doesn't always know stuff. Very unsure of self. 

Experiment AU: 

Izekiel Iris A being of Paint. Hes made of paint. He has trauma from being experimented on. Slightly depressed. Loves art, loved creating. also regresses to try to deal with said PTSD.  Hard to get to know at first. 

Matty  (Matthew Libelle)   An experiment, part human, part lizard, part dragon. Much smol.  Hes fucking baby and i adore him alot please do ask anything and everything about him. 

Cult bois:

-Nero Aakil   (Means Genius/Orange blossom)   Orange bub  - Leader. Smart. Telepathic link with all cult members.  V corrupted…  (Parents were rich and ignorant)

-Mao Cerise   Pink - Ditzy, Looks after their ‘little bird’ (aka Jey) 

-Jey Michael Cherubim   Fallen angel -  Corrupted..desaturating and weak.. Was summoned by the cult and captured as a trophy. 

-Jaden Hirav  Looks after a garden of plants both harmless and some not for master. Previously Neros old pet..His  The family was alright but he was moreso raised by like his mum and bro. He was kidnapped from his garden and never seen again. The cult ritual to initiate him into the group failed and he was spliced with plants making him near useless to the cult.

-Rowan maverick - Now known as  Rogue- Red. Lost their tongue. Does Not follow orders to the T but gets their job done.   Has another voice/god/soul looking out for them… Very assassin ready, very perceptive. Wants to get out the cult but knows theyre too far in.. Cool glowy words in the air because they don't have their tongue. Possibly only lives of medication and vitamin pills..possible OD? Possible addiction. They struggle alot with it. 

P - Pax -  God who watches over Rowan. Was killed by the Master but their spirt lives on.

Cato.   Purple - Another smart one.. Possible Wiccan?  Sadist. Mean. Tall.  Scary. Abuse. Twisted. Loves being in the cult. Eventually wants to host Masters soul.. 

Gin Short for Ginger but the real name is Xanthe.  Blind. Also another assassin like Rogue but more obedient.  Doesn't talk often out of fear. 

Benjamin Brandy  (Benji. B) is Gins friend, Gin is trying not to get him involved in the cult but was too late as B had previously already been cursed and dealt with mythical beings..

 Silver bub. Demir. A demon summoned by the cult to complete the collection. Wants out, very stressed.  

Adopted AU: (This is like a mess of some of the boys but younger and in a different timeline to their universes smushed together intoa kinda cute school/adoption au idea.)

Matthew is smol autistic, malnourished and heavily abused both mentally and physically, leading to selective mutism and being a small fragile easily tired bab.  He loves hanging in the library once he gets used to going to some schooling. Gets tutored by Chris? Goes to camp and helps around n has fun..

Jaden, loves the school garden, and likes science class. His family is alright, However he ends up mostly raised by his sister? Or brother? 

Iz is the lil art bab, also in foster care of a big family, not so much abused but semi neglected. Quiet.

Nero is the gifted nerdy child..Parents ignorant. They love history and fictional books and reading and learning.

Benji is the slightly older kid whos possibly maybe a little behind or delayed or..something, they help out with other kids as a buddy? They like to do cooking classes.

DA AU

So this Au was like..the Septic tank births all the egos.

Angus first- He has..some kinda strength I imagine/..

Then Anti, Hen, Jackie. Marv. 

Chase -  He kills himself because of Glitch- also falls in the tank a second time and ends up with odd powers. 

Glitch Starts off as very bad and misunderstood. Turns out they were just highly unstable and required medical treatment.  Their real name is Arius and they cant stomach solid foods all the time. Mostly a liquid diet. They have glitchy fits/static seizures. Very unpleasant. Can enter tech, and its not so great, can get trapped. Can absorb certain amounts of electricity because of this they Got hit by  ightning once and has epic lighting scars!! Up arms..some on neck. All over his chest and back. 

Septic clone AU

Sean giving up bits of soul to make clones ends up in coma

Experiments and torture and odd shit with the egos ensues??

Minecraft AU??  

Yeah i had weird ideas for a cute minecraft gang of minecrafters who had accidents involving getting merged/recded with other creatures traits ect. 

Vail.  -Vex / Human

Snow golom hybrid? Or Blaze?

Slimey boi

Kitsune

Panda lad.

Pokebabs au

Mainly for Matty, Iz and Blank.. were they have pokemon forms and when bonded with a human long enough can evolved into human forms?? 

Horned AU  (With Troiseh/Glitch-in-the-static)

Shiro  -Prince lad  (This is their lad :3)

Junji - Battery..whump/slave/lost prince 

Isao Asuka -  Shiros Royal Guard 

Alien AU

Hami if he were..alien instead of being a human in an apoc basically. 

Angel AU stuff: 

Good omens inspired boi

Leo Halvar   Part..humany..demon..Cambion are according to google "In late European mythology and literature, a cambion is the offspring of an incubus, succubus, or another demon with a human, or of an incubus and succubus"

Ryan  Hot archangel guy: One wing, demon hunter thing.. Good kinda reforming from a less nice lifestyle previously. 

Mute angel possibly demon idk- -   Latif? Emmet? Evan? 

Long fringe shy boy-  Cael / Lox

#list #ocs #egos #ideas #hcs #blu rambles #blus list #its fuckigng 2 am #im sorry if this makes no sense #but here are a fuck ton of lads #and a fuck ton of aus and ideas #if anyone ever wants to ask XP

[pwnyta]

Nobody ASKED for any of my shitty Pokemon character doodles... BUT IM IN A MOOD.

SO yall have to deal with it.

This is under a read more so dont come at me about it being annoyingly long. Blame Dumblr. Theres a SHIT TON OF DOODLES UNDER THE CUT.

First off I wanted to give Holly a whole classroom of friends... it wasnt GONNA be an all girls school... but I kept crankin of little girly Mons....

I dont actually have a shiny Darumaka or Eevee... but theyre two of my favorite shinies...

I drew these four after so theyre a bit different in style. Shiny Swirlex has the same excuse as the other two shinies... I just love the shiny colors

They also needed a teacher so I repurposed one of my older characters because I thought itd be funny to have a swan teacher... cuz swans are so scary but they care for their babies well.

Darla and Delilah can be bothered with threats because theyre safe with Mr Shandra.

Mikhail only takes classes that are small enough to fit under his wingspan so he can keep them all safe. And Eva and Tiffany learn from the best and just get pissed off like their teacher.

((Hes more bark than bite though... hes not a great fighter and a double weakness to Electric? Garbo. But he puts up a convincing enough front.))

And because he was a swan I gave him a life mate. The only other being that gets any softness from him.

He was an ex pirate.

Mikhail has no interest in criminals!!! So the captain gave up the pirate life and married a very short tempered bird and gained a lot of weight...because I wanted him chubby.

---

‘’Spider’’, Esi, and dear ol Dad. Despite Reds best efforts to keep Esi out of Osborns hands he still ended up an immensely shady bastard but at least hes not as broken as ‘’Spider’’.

I didnt finish their moms because I couldnt settle on a design for Spiders mum....

Now Spider works for Caedere his beloved boss who would never ever lie to him ever. (Hint: Spiders nature is ‘naive’)

---

I tried revamping Ray and Hebanon...  but Ray still gay as hell for his boy.

I bullied Sparky a little. He’ll probably be fine even if Rays got a Mega evo. Its the name of the game Ray... hes supposed to knock his opponent out... you cant get pissed when ever Hebanon gets fucked up in battle.

---

Did I post these? Am I ever gonna finish these character sheets? No. And look I forgot the most pressing detail of Zippos and thats his fuckin Arbok mark on his back. IM A FOOL.

Kreetan and his mum and dad.

So many little comic things I’ll never finish because theres too many and instead of just stopping and finishing something I keep adding to my unfinished doodles instead. This is why I dont take requests or anything.

I time where Leif and Cyndy actually grow up?

THEY ALL HAVE CAT EARS.

Zippo is curious.

.....AS A CAT.

Polly is here too!! And shes ready to punch someone RIGHT IN THE NOODLE.

I also thought itd be nice to draw out some other Chars of Zippo and Crizs generation.

Theyre.. as you may have guessed are not finished yet.

Clem is a timid lad, Mira... not so much. Very brave

Addy is a modest princess type

Jubilee is a sassy lass.

And Criz. A sweet bashful boy whos never done anything wrong and certainly will not die because no one would be cruel enough to let that happen.

((EYES EMOJI))

Babby Clem, Addy, and Jubilee.

WHO’RE THESE ASSHOLES?!

---

Updated Mistletoe. One spooky righteous(in his own mind) lad.

She only looks stoic to start... but shes quite the weirdo.

She just got here and shes ready to go home. What a mood.

Now for some less polished individuals....

Meh meh meh lookit me IM OMI. Im gonna put three of the exact same Pokemon in the same group so Pwnyta has to suffer tryna come up with different designs.

...But I do like them. I imagine that they remain Ekans because they wont need the mark of their tribe so no one will no where they come from. So spooky.

I was torn between the codename ‘Sundown‘ and ‘Daybreak‘ for Crobat.

By day hes a wholesome trustworthy priest... by night he tortures people for a shady shady bug man. He’ll determine if youre truly innocent.

Doc has to deal with all these fuckin weirdos... he just wants to be a doctor... BUT AT WHAT COST DOC?!

This is a sequel to the doodle comic I was makin in a previous post... Kop and Doc develop an interesting friendship (In Kops mind. Its more a ‘stalker with a crush’ situation) But hey if Kops not being paid then hes got no reason to hurt Doc.

...Docs a fun character to bully because hes so smarmy and small.

---

AND NOW FOR SOME SCIENCE BITCHES.

A man of few words and an intense curiosity with mortal beings and his own existence.

A spooky lad who doesnt quite mean to torment his subordinates... its just his Pressure.

Id imagine his form changes are a bit like Iron Man in IW when hes fighting Thanos.

I drew some more science bitches...

Some casual clothes for the original three stooges.

Shes deaf Franz! She cant hear you.

Ya know IDK if itd be ‘canon‘ that they all met as kids... I just thought itd be cute. Little psychic babies all doofin off together... the most troublesome one being asleep 90% of the time due to being an Abra.... and narcoleptic. Abra sleep so much naturally... Geller sleeps even MORE... thats why hes so incredibly smart even for an Alakazam.

I had a whole little redo sketch comic idea of Mewtwo breakin loose and fuckin shit up.... (its never been finished)

Franz tries to put him to sleep. (it doesnt work. He needs Emanuel and Nola to save him and he gets his arm broken for bein such a cheeky lad.)

Mewtwo doesnt have too much of a problem with Geller due to his soft spot for kids and pure desire for knowledge... but if hes gonna protect the other assholes then PERISH.

Dont worry though big boss Deo wont let his subordinates die let alone the second smartest after him... and saves them all pretty easy. A sharp tentacle arm through the chest will stop even Mewtwo.

Some booboos happen tho...

But hes fine eventually and finds his ex wife home watchin the kids.

Shes promptly expelled.

Geller also goes back for Dilla and steals him. Lifes too short not to adopt an ancient fossil baby.

Emanuel isnt delighted... but he doesnt have the heart to call the authorities on a man who risked his life to save him.

Fossil Mons come in two types-- Resurrected fossils which have the skin color of the primary coloring of their Pokemon form so they can be solid black or blue or red or w/e... Ancestors of ancient Pokemon have normal skin tones.

And another comic sketch idea... where Geller and Roswell are gifted with some fancy new Mega stones... Ros? Not too keen on the idea hes seen what can happen to a bitch when they Mega Evo... he aint got time for that. Geller goes HARD for SCIENCE.

Ros: Geller I know your a spoon guy but stick a fork in that bastard cuz hes done. COOKED. If he thinks im riskin my ass for his bullshit. Lets go tell him off together (im scared to go without you...)

Geller: We experiment on living things all the time for the sake of scientific progress.... are we really too good to be subject to our own studies?

Ros: YES. ABSOLUTELY.

After seeing Geller use his without hesitation, putting his body through a world of hurt for the sake of SCIENCE!!! Ros couldnt pussy out on his boy...

His Mega is just FABULOUS and now he loves it.

--

I was also makin a team with the Pokemon that have the highest stats (non Legends/Psudos/Megas) but I got bored after Blissey. She has a Togekiss wife I didnt finish either... Oh well.

Shes a bold lass and prefers double battles with her support wife. She doesnt like using dangerous moves as its in her nature as a Blissey to heal.

---

(I forgot his whiskers... OH WELL)

I wanted to give Flaminio some people who missed him after he got spirited away by his Ghosts.

After he disappeared people looked for him but he was never found and years and years went by and people stopped looking. Even Clove and Ceto had to move on.

Koban is a loyal bitch though and he never let it go. He still wants his friend back. Hes an old boy now... so old people probably call him ‘Nekomata‘ and wonder when his tail is gonna split.

#PKMN fanarts #RIP Omi if you get through all of this... #Pwny Gijinka mon fanarts.

[thesupavix-blog]

Loss.... more loss and Craig Brown. My worst best friend.

I’M BACK BITCHES! missed me? Well im not surprised really it’s been almost a year since I wrote one of these… as you can see from the title… it’s been a bit of a shit time.. so shit I couldnt even blog about it! Maybe I wasn’t ready?.. or maybe things just went wrong too fast and i couldnt keep up… yeah probably that one.

So… yeah… the last time I wanted to write a blog was back in September… my new job was amazing… everything was looking good for the Baker clan.. then cancer struck our family again… FUCK YOU CANCER! My mum was diagnosed with lung cancer that unfortunately had already spread to her stomach and brain… it was tough. We all knew the prognosis and we just had to find a way to get her as comfortable as possible… I honestly didn’t know what to do with myself… then one day a face from my past appeared on good old Facebook… I’d known this guy years ago… we worked together at my first job. He popped up at just the right time.. we got chatting and it was a nice distraction. I didn’t have to talk about my mum being sick.. he was just what I needed.. but then he asked to take me out… yeah.. no. I couldn’t go out with him with everything going on… so I explained about my mum and what was happening and he was fine about it… maybe this guy wasn’t so bad after all?… he’d message me every day to see how I was doing when mum was poorly.. (If you’re reading this… please know how much that meant to me!) We continued to talk.. and talk.. it was nice. He was nice. He’d still ask me to meet for a drink or a meal and i continued to fob him off because of all the crap.. at this point i knew that even if nothing happened he’d still be a good friend… but one night he just happened to be somewhere I had to walk past…. so I gave in and popped in for that drink… he wasnt a lot different to how I remembered him.. he carried himself well.. and still had that cheeky smile I remembered….. but we won’t get into that! He later asked me out again… and this time i thought sod it… What’s the worst that can happen?… (really vic?… you really had no idea?!… idiot) so he took me to the cinema.. to watch a super geeky film.. which I loved! Because.. well… I’m a Nerd. (That’s no secret!) All through the film his chair made a weird fart sound when he moved… I could tell he was embarrassed but it made me laugh.. he took almost the whole film to hold my hand.. which also made me laugh a bit.. I kept moving so he couldn’t… mean?.. yes. But he got it in the end. We had our first kiss in the cinema too… it was a bit awkward… but i knew I wanted to be kissing him.. there was no doubt. Not from my side anyway… I was like a super smiley freak for days after… every time his name popped up on my phone….. (sad I know) About a week later my friend Katie came home to visit… she wanted to see me as she couldn’t be there for me when I lost my mum… it was a tough time but I explained to her that I’d been talking to someone and we’d gone out… Katie being Katie took it upon herself to invite him out… CRINGE!! I was not prepared for that… as he walked in the door I couldnt help but smile.. but i still wanted to kick Katie!! Stupidly I assumed We would all just stay in the pub having a few drinks… but no. Katie asked if he wanted to go to town… and he said yes!! It was a good night… I felt bad though because he paid for us to have a VIP area… he didn’t need to! He didn’t need to impress me! I’m not the kind of girl anyone needs to impress… as the night went on… Katie invited lots of people we didnt know into our little corner.. I wasn’t feeling it tbh… I wanted to have fun bit i just kept worrying about her… so he suggested we leave… while outside we got chatting to people… (I wish we had just left. Because what happened next still kills me… it’s burned into my brain and after everything that’s happened in the past 7/8 months… I hear this conversation in my head like it was yesterday… the worst part is.. I don’t even think he remembers it) While outside the club a friend of mine *Simon* stops to talk… he makes some stupid comment and he gets angry and fronts up to Simon… I have to pull them apart and calm it down before the bouncers do!… I tell Simon to leave and he does and two girls approach to check im okay… they give him what for… because he shouldnt have started a fight with the lad. He apologised and i said i was fine… the next thing I know one of the girls is asking us if we’re a couple… (this is the bit i remember vividly so i shall quote it) Girl ‘are you guys a couple? You’re really cute together!’ Me ‘no’ Him ‘well i wouldnt mind….’ (In my head I was like WHAT THE FUCK?) He then proceeds ‘I’d like it to be more… I really like you, but i don’t want it to be anything unless you’re serious’…. now it may have been the vodka… wine and beer in my system but I believed him.. he said it in such a genuine way that how could I not?… At this point the girl grabs me and tells me I should say yes!! So I did…. and so begins the roller coaster ride that has been my life these past few months… That night was amazing… I’d finally found someone I trusted.. I could talk to.. and still in the back of my mind if things didn’t go to plan.. we’d be good friends no matter what. I was happy for the first time since losing my mum… and to be truthful since even before then. I’d probably already started to fall for him those weeks we had been talking… I knew he had kids… and he worked away a lot but he always made time to talk to me.. and I could tell him anything. Even if it was stupid. I hadn’t got work untill the afternoon the next day.. he stayed over and left early but came back a few hours later… we just snuggled on the sofa watching tv.. it was lovely.. he even took me to work. I don’t even remember most that day… I pretty much floated round on a cloud!!… the best bit was… and I may sound awful for this… I knew I wouldnt see him for a while… I knew he had his kids at the weekend and would be working all week.. all my previous attempts with guys ended because they didn’t like that I always worked… I don’t do clingy… I like to live my own life. Shit… this guy was perfect. 😂

Am I boring you yet?… haha yeah me too. Let’s skip forward a bit… Mr perfect is still Mr perfect.. talking every day… calling me while driving to and from places… You know when you think life is great… and nothing can bring you down… yeah… never trust that feeling. Because it can and it will bring you down. He decided that because he was going to have to move to Wales.. that we should end it.. he felt that settling in to his new house and making time for his kids was priority… and I respected that…. yeah it sucked… and I’d have preferred not to have that conversation over messenger but hey ho.. story of my life… he begged me to not hate him… I didn’t. He asked that we stay friends.. and said he didn’t want to lose me from his life…. I was happy with that. I knew I’d started to fall for him.. but I’d rather have him as my friend than nothing.

We were doing okay as friends… but he seemed a bit off… then it hit me… he’s obviously moved on.. which honestly hurt a bit… because apparently us ending things had nothing to do with him moving and asking time for his kids… not if he’d moved on already… (I wasn’t wrong.. but it took another week to tell me)…. but yeah I’m getting to that…

The next week or so we were getting back to normal.. it was coming up to Christmas.. we had movie nights.. we watched tv.. played chess and star gazed in the garden… he’d helped me decorate my Christmas tree.. so I was feeling pretty okay with my first Christmas without mum… We weren’t a couple but i was happy we could stay friends.. he’d pop up some nights to say hi or watch a film… and bring the odd take away for us to share… but he had to eat them himself because i was under the weather and couldn’t stomach a giant pizza with spicy wings as well!! How he isnt the size of a house is beyond me… we planned to meet up and swap Christmas presents as I knew he was away over Christmas.. (probably to be with his new gf although he never specified)….. I woke up one morning to my phone beeping… it wasn’t a sound I’d heard before… it was slightly confusing.. when i picked it up there was a notification on the screen [did you forget to input your period?] WHATTTTTT??????? As I frantically unlocked my phone and checked my period Callander I saw that I was 8 days over!!!! 8days!!!!!!! Fuck off!!… At this point i was already bricking it…. how could I tell him that?… no. I decided to wait until I was sure… I got some pregnancy tests… and waited for the next morning like they suggest… and boom. PREGNANT! I was numb… how the hell could this be happening to me… I lost my mum.. the guy I wanted… chose someone else…. and now.. I had to tell him he was gonna have another kid… I’ll be honest… it took me 2 days to tell him.. mainly because he hadn’t been on messenger to reply to any messages… so I waited till he contacted me… I felt weird.. how do I say this.. we’d not spoken like we used to for ages… and It had gotten to the point where I was genuinely scared he’d hate me (still not convinced he didn’t tbh)… so he popped up and replied to an old message… and I replied with we need to talk… I’ve been to the doctors. Thinking about it… I don’t rambert his response… I just know he was at my house within about 5mins…. I was sat on the floor… and he sat down in front of me… he already knew but he needed me to say it. I swear I saw his heart break…. I felt so guilty. It killed me seeing him like that.. It wasn’t a great day… he’d had some other stuff going on that I didn’t know about until after our chat… needless to say.. it just made me feel worse. He reassured me that he’d support me whatever happened… I believed him and then said he needed to go and sort out the other stuff he had going on… it wasn’t exactly how I saw our friendship going… but yeah… I guess we had to get used to it. I was pregnant and couldn’t get rid of it… this was our life now…

One thing that struck me in the weeks that followed… although we were finally getting back to how we had always been.. chatting constantly throughout the day.. dont get me wrong I wasn’t complaining… this idiot was slowly becoming my best friend. I could talk to him about my shit days at work and I’d listen to his stories about work and the kids… it was nice.. but we never discussed the whopping great elephant in the room.. we never talked about the baby. I kinda just carried on as I knew he had stuff to deal with and as much as it sucked I knew he wouldnt be around if he didn’t want to be…. or at least i hoped. As the weeks went on… I saw him less but we still talked… he still didnt ask about the baby… it made me sad but I figured if i was shitting myself im sure he was too… so I left it alone. One night he turned up after Christmas and new year (I was 7 weeks) and he just seemed a bit odd… like he wanted to say something but didn’t… I wasn’t expecting to see him due to the fact I was pretty sure he was seeing his new gf…. I didn’t push it. Eventually he explained that she’d been making digs about me and the situation and he had ended it… I was shocked. I didn’t really know what to say…. so we just watched tv.. he ended up staying that night too…. and boy am I glad… at around 1.45 in the morning I woke up needing the loo… like… i thought i was going to wet myself… as I ran from my bed into the bathroom before I could grab for the light switch I felt it all trickle down my legs… then I slipped and fell… I hit the radiator on the bathroom wall and slid down into the puddle… I heard him call out… he’d obviously heard the bang and asked if I was okay… it was then that I smelt it. Pennies. I hadn’t wet myself… it was blood… I started to cry and I heard him call again as he got out of bed.. I shouted to turn the light on… the next thing I remember is us both just there covered in blood… me sobbing and him hugging me asking what to do…. we both knew what was happening… I cried for him to get Sandra from next door. So he did…. the next few hours consisted of Sandra keeping me calm… him calling the paramedics… the paramedic looking at me like he felt sorry for me… and him having to hold me up in the shower before I got taken to hospital…. I’m going to sound really selfish now… but if he hadn’t been there what would I have done?… I couldn’t get up once I fell.. and I hadn’t taken my phone to the toilet…. who knows how long I’d have been there….. I digress…. He followed me to the hospital… and waited with me… he called my sister and let her know what was happening to me… and after they made us wait hours to be told I’d have to go back for confirmation of misscariage scan he helped me home and made my bed while I had a shower… he cleaned up any mess left and stayed with me until he had to leave for work…. I was numb. But he checked in on me and made sure I was okay…. despite the fact that in my very fragile state of mind I told him I loved him and he conveniently didn’t hear me… I knew I needed him in my life as my friend… he made me feel safe at the worst possible moment of my life… he didn’t have to do that. A few days later i woke to a call from him.. reminding me to get up for my scan.. it was a weird day.. he sounded optimistic on the phone.. he’d had a conversation with his mum and seemed to think there was a chance for the baby to be okay…. I let him be optimistic.. but i didnt buy into it. I knew what that was… it was all over. My sister took me for my scan… she was also weirdly optimistic I really wished they wouldn’t be.. I was heartbroken enough I didn’t need that added pressure. We eventually found the scan place… they made me pee on a stick before the scan.. after a miscarriage you can still test positive so I wasn’t really sure why I had to…. I went into the scan room.. I’d never had a scan in my life I was a bit scared… because I knew they just wanted to see if I needed a d&c to get rid of anything left over…. The woman doing the scan had a right miserable face… she’d had lots of women walk in to her room happy that day and all of them had come out crying…. even she was staring to lose the will to live… then suddenly her eyes widened…. she saw a heart beat…… My sister almost fell off her seat. I just kept repeating the phrase 'what the fuck?’ Over and over… I was still pregnant. Shit. I gotta bloody tell him again!!!!!

I tried to call him but he was working so I sent him a message saying there was still a heartbeat… he called as soon as he got it… it was a weird phone call. Nobody knew what to say.. there was a lot of awkward silence.

I was relieved everything was okay… but i was still scared… how was it going to do this on my own? When the dad barely mentioned it?… I didn’t doubt for a second that he would support us… I just couldn’t get my head round why we didnt talk about it. He mentioned it on occasions but in silly contexts… maybe to make me laugh like… I said my friend Kat was my favourite ginger… (him being ginger) placed his hand on my belly and said…. 'she doesn’t mean that!’ Or after sleeping with me 'at least i cant get you pregnant!’….. thats not even funny. But you know i was just glad he acknowledged the baby…

In February it was time for my 12 week scan… I was scared and excited.. I’d had other scans as I’d had bleeding on and off.. I’d seen baby but this was the proper one.. I really wanted him there… he said he’d try. He wasnt there… I’d told him when it was… I hadn’t heard off him… I just assumed he was busy with work. Baby was wriggling away… everything was good!! I could finally relax…. A bit later on he messaged me asking how my day had been…. had he actually forgotten??…. was i just over thinking?… he then proceeded to tell me how he’d left early from where he’d been working (like he said he would to make the scan) and gone to collect his new car!! I was hurt…. but i couldnt even tell him I was… did he really care that little?… I said I was tired and was off to sleep… I then sent over the scan pictures and said I’d forgotten to send them earlier…. He responded with sad faces…. FUCKING SAD FACES??…. why are you sad? I asked why he was sad… did he not want to see? And he replied with 'of course I wanted to see… I’m just gutted you didn’t let me know’

Now… for the record… I’d sent him the letter with the date… he told me he had meetings in Cardiff but would try to rearrange them.. and the week before I asked if he knew if he was free on the 9th… he then told me he was in London but would leave early in the morning to be there….. as you can imagine I was pretty angry…. but me being me… put it down to a misunderstanding…. hormones or not… I was upset by this… am i wrong to be? But somewhere deep down… I love this idiot and let it slide… because I don’t want to fight… or fall out.

I just wanted to get through this pregnancy with as little upset as possible… unfortunately… that wasn’t to be.

At week 13 I had more bleeding… a friend took me to Worcester where I had another scan… baby was fine… fingers and toes in tact. Wriggling away… lady doing the scan said i needed to stop being so paranoid… I was calm and relaxed that week… and was happy with baby’s progress… At 14weeks I was chilling at home in bed listening to music when I suddenly needed a wee…. as I sat on the toilet there was this gush…. I wasn’t weeing yet… what the hell??… I caught some of it on the tissue.. it was clear… Definitely not wee… WTAF? I called my midwife who said i needed to go to A&E….. she thought my waters had broken… I had no pains.. just that. I was up at hospital for a fair while… they checked me over and my cervix was closed tight so they booked me in for a scan the following week… at 15 weeks… I went for my 5th scan…. usually by now you’ve only had your 12 week scan… the lady seemed irritated that I was there again… untill she saw the image…. she informed me that I’d lot most of my amniotic fluid… I had my brother in law with me… but i wanted him there!!! I was so scared… I didn’t know what all this meant… They sent me through to see a nurse who informed me that baby was fine but I’d have to have a scan every week to check on the fluid… as baby needs that to develop… Over the next few weeks it was a matter of go for a scan… let him know how it was all going…. I really just wanted him there with me… but i knew his job was important. I was due to move house… I was on strict instructions to take it easy… drinking 8 pints of water a day to help bring up my fluids for baby… I didn’t know what was going to happen…. nobody did.

Fast forward a few weeks… 19weeks pregnant… I went to Worcester for a scan… and although the my waters had been going up… this week they’d dropped again.. but baby was still hanging on… and fighting. Little tough nut like mummy and daddy!! Baby was still growing… things looked good. I went for lunch with friends and celebrated their birthday… I couldn’t wait to get home… put my feet up and talk to him… tell him everything was good. We had 1 more week untill we were classed as in the clear and they could offer treatment to baby if needed…. I decided to go get ready for bed… even though it was only 6.30 in the evening… but when I went to the loo… I felt something strange… I knew what it was… I could tell… I called my sister in a panic who told me to call 999…. my sisters got there before the ambulance.. once the paramedics got in… I described what I felt and before I knew it.. I was being blue lighted to the hospital. On the way I listened to them on the radio… they called it a prolapsed cord… I wasn’t in labour but if the cord was out baby was at risk… everything else is a blur… I didn’t have my phone… I needed to call him. He needed to know! I needed him there. My sister messaged him for me.. and he said he was on his way…. I don’t even think it took him long… but before he got there they did a scan… I knew before they said it… there was no heartbeat. I felt my heart shatter into a million pieces.. I saw all my sisters hearts break as they looked at me.. the pity in their eyes… this was meant to be our families little bit of goodness after everything we’d been through…. I was numb. I couldn’t cry. I couldn’t talk… and suddenly I didn’t want him there… I didn’t want to tell him that! Classic vic… more worried about someone else than herself…. The midwife told him before letting him in to see me…. he didn’t say a word as he walked through the door… or at least i dont think he did… all I could see was the pity in his eyes…. he felt bad for me… As usual… something bad happens to vic… poor vic. Seriously universe….. PICK ON SOMEONE ELSE NOW!!! I cannot take any more. He may have said something to me as he came in for a hug…. but i dont remember anything… I just remember the bubbling feeling as he held me… the tears bubbled up from every part of my body… I couldn’t hold them in any longer… He was finally there. But it was too late… Our baby was gone. Our baby was still a secret to most people and now there was no secret anymore…. The midwife came and explained that they were going to induce labour… I was hooked up to a drip… and they’d increase it every few hours to start contractions…. I had a few belly aches in the night but nothing major… he went for a sleep and came back just in time to hear me crying from the pains… he held my hand.. he looked after me… he didn’t need to but he did. (Again..if your reading this… I appreciate that! More than you’ll know) By the morning it was pretty clear that my body was not going to go into labour.. so they changed the medication… at this point it was just me and him… I spent most the time worried he was going to get into trouble for not going to work… and then the pain started… he called the midwife for painkillers… it eased a bit… but then came back worse… the midwife said it wouldn’t be long… i kicked him out so she could check me over… she then said it was time and I needed to push… I was already crying from the pain… but then suddenly this sound came from me… I didnt know i was capable of that sound.. he appeared in the door way… he said he was coming back in.. I was glad!! I knew what that sound was… I had realised that’d I would hear my baby cry… I’d never see their smile… and I’d never feel their warmth!! It broke me… I sobbed.. all I could do was sob… he reassured me i was doing good… as did the midwife.. I didn’t feel like I was doing okay… I felt like a failure! Like I’d done something wrong and caused all this!! I felt like I’d let my baby down… like i wasnt good enough to be a mum. Once the baby was out… and I thought i could relax… things seemed to go from bad to worse… the after birth hadn’t come out.. I was bleeding and hundreds of people came rushing in… I went from heartbroken to terrified in a split second… everything was hazy from the gas and air… I knew he was still holding my hand… I could vaguely hear him telling me I was okay…. but it was bad. Everything was going dim… I could hear them saying I was bleeding and it wouldn’t stop… they mentioned surgery… suddenly I couldnt feel his hand in mine.. some blurry doctor was ramming another cannula in my hand… the pain woke me up a bit… they put a mask over my face and said I’d feel sleepy… I could feel my heart beat in my ears… every time I blinked the room got darker… his face appeared over me… I felt better… he was the only person in that room I knew… I was scared… I felt safe knowing he was still here… the stuff in my mask was burning my nose and throat.. I sneezed… I felt my stomach turn over… I kept trying to tell them I was going to be sick… finally someone heard me and let me sit up a bit and gave me a bowl… suddenly the room was less noisey… the after birth had come out… (one way to do it! Sorry TMI) I didn’t need to be rushed to surgery… I don’t remember much else… I think he told me my sisters were here… then I dont really know…maybe I passed out… or fell asleep. I was so tired.

The next think I remember is waking up and seeing him… just sat in the chair next to me… he was talking to my sister’s who were scattered around the room… I don’t remember having much conversation… they let me rest for a while… and then the midwife asked if I wanted to meet my baby…. it was a weird feeling… They brought in a cold cot… and in the cot was the most tiny… yet perfectly formed baby. We called her Terry Hope. I chose Terry because my dad called my mum that… and he picked her middle name Hope. She had my mums hands… and his family nose.. and my niece’s mouth… she was beautiful. It was even more heartbreaking. I was in hospital for a week… he stayed with me… and Terry stayed in the room with us in the colt cot. It was weird. We both woke up in the night and checked on her…. I don’t know why. We just did. I honestly don’t know what I’d have done without all my family and him that week… They kept me going.

The hardest day was saying goodbye to her at hospital. He’d had to go back to work the day before and I’d got 2 friends with me… I didn’t say much on the way home… I just cried silently to myself…

I had so many visits from people in the next week or so… that I honestly didn’t know how to act… I kept strong around people… but even 5 minutes alone I’d break down and cry….

I’m so greatful for everyone’s support… I don’t think I could have done this without them.. He was a God send. Yeah I’m aware that some people reading this are wondering why I’m not using his name… well… he’s super important to me… we’re not together but I love him dearly and if those reading this don’t know him then what does it matter…. all they need to know is that he’s a good person… he supported me where he could.. and that’s all anyone needs to know.

Yes… we’ve spent a lot of time together this past month… and from the outside it’s seemed confusing. We will always be connected… we had a baby together. We brought her into this world together… and we buried her and said goodbye together…. He’s more like a best friend to me… and hopefully I am to him too…. I just want him to know that despite all our ups and down.. and things not working out between us.. or with Terry… I’m glad this happened with you.. someone I have history with. Someone that as much as you’re a dickhead 9 times out of 10… you were there for me. The end. Well Craig... I'll be honest.. you offered me little to no support.. and I didnt hate you for that.. you were my friend.. but you have ruined it.. I'm so so disappointed in you..maybe one day you'll realise what a bad friend you've been and maybe one day we can rebuild our friendship but untill then I guess this is goodbye.. 💔.

I’m still not 100% at the moment…. And although it’s taken a while… I’m seeing all the things I’m struggling with… I spend time with my sisters and their kids… and I’m fine. I then realise that I don’t get to do that with mine… and it hurts. It’s that heartbreak all over again. I hope I get used to it…. because I doubt it’ll go away… I just need people to be patient with me… if i randomly start crying… or randomly go off radar…. it’s just how im feeling right now. I miss my baby girl every day… I see her in the faces of my sisters kids and it kills me.. I’ll never forget you beautiful girl. 381 ♡ And I cannot take any more loss…. I lost my mum… got dumped by 'Mr perfect’ 😂… got pregnant… lost my baby… and her dad moved miles away… my life is not easy… but I’m surviving. I think.

Peace out Bitches. ✌ SupaVix

[fuckraperos]

so lets see. dog food. mm look at those feet. thats a real nice broad there you can tell shes classy by those toes and also the length of her skirt and how its prim at the same time as playful. you can definitely turn that into some fetish shit but look out its not sure yet shes going to have enough mind body detachment to see it as choreography as opposed to just an incomprehensible misplacing of attention on her wrong end. o wait what up with the dog. the bowl is just by those toes mm tongue out. if i were that dog id be fucking down to eat there; matterfact…. you can guess i dont need to say it. so ok whats up in general. ok so they just sat down somewhere, the whole time it has seemed to me the guys kitchen but i realise now theres nobody to say table for three to there (it felt just imprecise copywriting) plus that would be a sad fucking kitchen if you have the wherewithal to have those mouldings but your kitchen table is that size. ok so theyre at a restaurant well done i dont have to go into the absurdity of having your dog on a leash at home, which i had originally read as a maladroit but still likely to work widely way of conveying dominance marketing device. i mean it probably still is considering the guy has had enough time to get the wine and is still holding the leash. is he just going to sit there grabbing it the whole time and eat with one hand? mind you with those toes i may want to sneak a cheeky wank under the table if i were that feller. lets put two and two together; the leash, the tongue, the toes. you tell me.

now hey lets talk about something important anyway. so the bro is at the table brilliant i was going to point out that besides the dog he has a glass of water on his table and the girl doesnt, and was going to say something along the lines of thats what i call hedging my bets, but actually if you look as closely as i have by now youll notice she does actually have a glass of her own so its not overtly like the guy is just playing the long game of being less drunk than she is so he can suck on those feet while smugly passing it as exploitative gourmandising rather than while crushed by shame. anyway the whole thing makes me think, considering the dogs bowl is empty — who the fuck is asking for the dog’s food, then? it’s probably the dog himself. this ad it’s legit a stock dog speaking to you. what the fuck is he saying? hes not asking you to think of his kind next time youre being classy and impress the girl by dropping a wad on ethically made chicken and turkey cause thats not what hes fucking doing. what the stock dog is saying is if you were a better man youd have a dog you feed legit fucking food to as opposed to those biscuits shits you feed him that make you sometimes ponder platos cave for a little bit and youd have enough left over to be slammin a broad like that. so i mean you might as well start small and things will fall into place soon. which if you notice, the guy has clearly not done, as the dog as were concerned has not been served yet. so thats an example of adverts speaking to people unlike those they portray / conjure. but anyway, ���slamming a broad like that’. and what do you know about the broad? the toes. i mean pretty much. you dont really notice the yellow skirt the first minute. consider whats centred whats not. consider where the light is. homie is wearing the most nondescript shoes ever you might as well just paint over that part of the poster. so thats just darkness. ok so you see this at the tube station, your eye goes to the centre, and then ok whats up, where do i go from here, you dont really go to the darkness weve established is the guy, the next closest thing thats light is the feet, which if you miss the boring empty bowl will just direct you straight at, which i thank it for. but i mean that feets is all you need to know about a broad to decide whether its wife zone or not. oh but what if she a ho? youll make it work son. you can articulate a lot of more or less healthy and certainly potentially longevous marital narrative around toes like that.

anyways lately ive been thinking about what the fuck is up with the feet thing and im buying more and more into the vulnerability thing insofar as this guy is more clothed and more covered and in fact an animal pal solicitously further obscures him and his feet, while the toes are attached to a body fundamentally more exposed as well as juxtaposed to an empty receptacle rather than a sentient being that generally reads as of prey. are you thinking what im thinking here? i mean look at the colour of the manicure its perfect goddam those toes are the female equivalent of the amazingly lit foot of the table which is itself so sexed up in post prod that if it were a pair of feets it would be a delicious one like the one on the right of this picture. i mean consider everybodys feet are tantalisingly out the dogs the tables and crucially the babes the sugars the shawtys but the homies aint. you know why dag cos hes in control. cos thats really the thing with the whole feet thing isnt it its a form of nudity that a certain sector of the population subjects to and not the other and it comes with all sorts of added layers like does it hint at a well kempt genital periphery or she couldnt really run very far if she had to. the physicality of it has a social obverse to it about status but not going there now. all of this you could never get from fixating on the average girls knees. and theres this smear campaign saying this shit is freudian or like its about being secretly gay and toes being a substitute for dick presumably specifically ten of them but its ultimately people classing something as abnormal that they still do, just deliberately avoiding sexual frames (because nudity is a relative state that by default draws attention and in this day and age the sort of shoe shes wearing is nudity, and besides everybody is always oglin everything on everybody else all the time so there is no reason toes should be excepted) rather than just saying yes this whole fucking thing we collectively have going on with women collectively is about power and its fucked, which is actually not so bad because once you say it ok fine you have acknowledged and at this point you can just be like oh but i still fux with it doe and move on as actually a better person. anyways lads you know the drill cover up drink water have money generally play it cool youll get places.

[grapsandclaps]

FIGHT CLUB PRO PROJECT MAYHEM NIGHT 2

After the previous nights shenanigans, it was going to be a long day ahead with the show not starting till 7pm so with that i still awoke from my Novotel slumber at 730am to write Night 1 of this weekend (the lengths i go for your entertainment) and also to study the days horse racing before moving off to the britwres staple of Wetherspoons for breakfast.

As readers will know i had a previous issue with the Spoons in Wolverhampton as their service was something not to be proud of, but i guess they got wind of the bad review and produced a decent standard on this morning.

With lots of time to pass it was off to see more of the local establishments starting off with The Goose which is a bit like a Wetherspoons laden in Wolverhampton Wanderers flags and with Wolves playing on this day it was packed making for a decent atmosphere. A pint of 5% IPA was had here at a cost of £3.25 (with a Camra discount), i recommend this pub if you fancy a change from Wetherspoons.

Next pub was The Royal London to see 2 of the many Chris's of the graps crew - Dan and Chris is a popular wrestling fan name and it is quite the struggle when there are 5 of each in the room. This pub is similar to The Footage in Manchester and has a great selection of drink anything ranging from £3 to £4.50 in price and one of the better pubs on the Wolves scene.

It was then time to check into the self-acclaimed "MURDER HOTEL"☠☠☠☠which despite some bad reviews turned out to be decent but like every Britannia hotel it smelt of Old and Staleness. Checked in i met everyone else who congregated in The Hooded Ram which is a mixture of an Indian Street Food restaurant/bar, here i had a pint of Mordue IPA for £3.80 and once again another decent drinking hole.

The drinking festivities took us then to the Hog's Head for the Saturday ritual of watching my football coupon going down on Soccer Saturday, much fun here seeing Rochdale go 2 up early vs Gillingham whilst supping my 4.1% Black Ice Ale from Titanic Brewery.

Next stop on the way was the #lovethegraps (Alan Boon and Chris East give them a follow) meet up in Jacks Cafe Bar & Restaurant near to the Starworks venue. This was also the venue for the Geoff Ogden Gauntlet for The Gold (BritWres Pool Championship), there was plenty of challengera here including early contenders - Athers, Myself and Gadge for whom the latter had Geoff on the ropes till missing the black leaving Geoff open for a 4 ball clear up to the amazement of the restaurant crowd.

This though took a toll on Geoff as he dropped the title to globetrotting DJ Kreiss who doubled a lucky yellow on his way to victory. But that wasnt the end to the madness with Kreiss dropping the belt to Athers who is now on a 4 match streak beating 3 others to end proceeding. So watch out for the next chapter in Stockport next week. Food had here was a huge Cheesy Garlic Naan for £3.50 and a Lamb Jalfrezi with a kick of chilli for £8.95. It filled a hole and was very tasty - well worth another trip even if just for the £3.10 for a pint of Pravha.

Wrestling time and for the first time I was front row at a show and if it was anything like the night before it was going to be good, so lets see what went down :-

First out was Chris Brookes with his injured wolf Kid Lykos vs EITA who came with the present of a dog collar neckbrace for Lykos to the cheers of the crowd and was worked well into the match. Really good match here with EITA standing out better than the previous nights 6 man match but after many distractions from Lykos, Brookes picked up the win again with the CHEEKY ROLL UP OF DOOM! When will wrestlers learn to counter this move?

CZW Rules tag match with Havoc and Margera fresh from their crazy Deathmatch the night before, came out to a well deserved standing ovation for their efforts vs Wentz & Xavier. This was an ok match but having seen the chaos from the night before this paled into comparison sadly, lots of ladders, light tubes and chairs - one of which was passed by myself to Desmond Xavier leaving me chairless and sitting on the floor like it was a school assembly much to the laughter of Alan Boon and Shauna - Cheers 😁. Havoc got the win for the Callous Hearts here with the rainmaker.

Next up was the much anticipated Shane Strickland vs THE BIG O - OMARI and this didnt miss a beat! A bit of an early feeling out process before Strickland worked on Omari's arm which was an opposite to the usual Strickland high flying offence. Omari made the comeback with an awe-inspiring Huracarana from the top rope that must have been a 10ft drop given Omaris height, The Big O slam got a close 2 fall, then after another attempt he fell into a keylock submission from Strickland (great reversal this) and with that it led to a Strickland win in a fantastic match and another star making performance by Omari who could be the 2018 MVP - Watch This Space 😮.

ITS KICKING TIME! With Mochizuki facing Travis Banks in a short 7 minute kick and chop fest which was alright whilst it lasted and could have done with a few more minutes given the two combatants. Mochi picked up the win with a flying kick from the top for a sudden victory over the luckless Banks.

After the break, the sirens blared and here comes NO FUNNNNNAAAAHHH Damien Dunne calling out Bar Manager for the night Session Moth Martina with added run ins from Shay Purser and Jack Sexsmith who used the numbers right to get the upper hand on Dunne who was sent packing to the back with the taste of 3 Flavoured Condoms in his gob.

7 way scramble next with Aussie Open vs Mark Haskins vs Millie McKenzie vs Jordan Devlin vs "Canvasback" David Starr vs OOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOSSSSSSHHHHH CIMA. This was all action like the night before's scramble with the main focus being on Millie McKenzie hanging with the lads and she performed brilliantly here and she is another who 2018 could be something brilliant on the UK scene. Apart from Millie - Starr, CIMA and the Aussies were cheered greatly by the Wolves massive and it was one of those who got the win in a brilliant match to watch - CIMA!!

One thing to report here after the match, a couple of reprobates were rightly scolded for the shout out of "GET YOUR TITS OUT!" to Millie. Wrestling at times recently has incorporated the local village idiots you see on the darts and football terraces of the UK and its a shame when stuff like this happens - Tossers!

Semi Main was Kay Lee Ray vs Jessica Havok in a good womens match with Havok playing the monster role well and as i have said this weekend, i couldnt believe she still isnt in TNA or even maybe in WWE as she is a good fit. Here she picked up the big win with a top rope tombstone to KLR in 10 minutes and with that it was time for the main event 6 man tag match.

British Strong Style vs OI4K & Sami Callihan in maybe the top 3 of great matches of the whole weekend. This was a huge step up from the Dragon Gate 6 way, action all over the building here including an insane dive from Dave Crist from the top of the rampway onto the wrestlers below. A coast to coast RKO from Jake Crist to Tyler Bate which had this writer in awe at what he had seen and to top it all off - Trent Seven hit a huge top rope piledriver for the win in 20 minutes to a huge standing ovation and a fitting end to a great weekend.

The night was still young though with the graps gang invading local rock bar The Giffard to dance the night away to Meatloaf, Fleetwood Mac and Queen. One thing to note though - The Giffard loos were a sight of wet bog roll, stale piss and a reet fishy smell - what a scene to paint 😯.

2am it was time to go to bed to get sleep in before the next days decision to take in another wrestling show in Salford - WrestlePro with our Geoff and David Starr's Number 1 Fan Shauna.

In closing, I would like to say Fight Club Pro pulled a blinder this weekend with some great moments and action - The Deathmatch is something i have even been trying to describe at work this morning which means it is still fresh in my mind. Sadly missing the remaining 2 FCP shows this year due to prior bookings but it has made me want to see them more next year live, which fingers crossed I will be able to do. #grapsandclaps

[grapsandclaps]

STRICTLY COME WRESTLING PART 1

Hello Everyone! Welcome to the story of Show 59 of the now re-badged #100showyear which took me to the sunny seaside skies of Blackpool for PCW and their double header of a beer garden show and a show at the home of Week 9 of Strictly Come Dancing - The Tower Ballroom.

First of all though as ever in this blog it wasnt straight to the wrestling, it was off to The Seven Stars Wetherspoons in the Printworks for one of their graps famous breakfasts sadly not with a pint of Guiness but with a Latte as I was being a very good boy - total cost of £6.45 for this and filled a whole, very much a 7 on the spoons brekkie scale.

The train to Blackpool was full of Sheffield Wednesday fans in our carriage who were travelling to Preston for the 1st day of the season, thankfully the football gods were looking down on them as the Sheff Wednesday fans tweaked their nipples with their tone deaf singing and general boistrous antics to sentence their team to defeat. Thank god for Godley & Creme on my Deezer.

Arriving in Blackpool, the sight of the venue not being open due to a venue issue - britwres never goes smoothly 😞. So whilst we were waiting it was across to the local Walkabout for a sticky floor and an overpriced half pint of Heineken (£2.55), then to the Litten Tree for a £3.65 pint of Stella which was a bit timny in taste but hey ho!.

Leaving the pub at 120pm to see the show had just started 50 minutes late, but give PCW their due they actually kept people updated, some companies just dont bother. So here is a quick rundown of what went down at The Beer Garden Bash:

Seymour Gains beat Arcadian in around 5 minutes with The Chris Linay Special (Torture Rack) RACK EM!! Seymour looking good here, as mentioned in previous blogs much improved from last year.

Philip Michael wearing his t-shirt due to either the breezy conditions or not wanting to get sunburn like he did last time beat Sheikh El-Sham in a good 10 minute match. El-Sham is the best of the 2 North West Sheikhs and has a great look bodywise and isnt too bad in the ring - could be mistaken for David Haye. Sheikh also has a knack for winking at me during the match, probably because i always boo him, with time he could do alright for himself.

Martin Kirby beat Dave Birch in maybe the best wrestling match of the show with the Sable Bomb. Birch is another example of improvement from around 6 months ago and more than held his own with the more experienced Kirby. Good Stuff 🖒

Next up was the battle of the female titans it was Lauren vs Rhio. Now these two at the start of their academy careers had a couple of royal stinkers that had you doing more head shaking and covering your eyes than 80s legend Bully off Bullseye. Now even though this might not have been a classic, Rhio is showing improvement in the ring and is probably better than Lauren now. Lauren got the win here with the cheeky bridge roll up but clearly from my vantage point you could see Rhio’s shoulders up - this was the start of a few dodgy decisions from referee Kalom.

Second to last match was Jake Long vs James Finn - an alright match here with both lads showing good offence here with Long picking up the deadly Cheeky Roll Up win on Finn even after misjudging a SSP.

Main event was all kinds of daftness with Ashton Smith portraying T-Bone with all the trimmings i.e bad irish accent vs T-Bone portraying Ashton with all the trimmings i.e pumping fist, trunks that were a size too small and painted on black abs as per Dragon Gate star - Cyber Kong.

This was very much everything an afternoon show match should be and what PCW are great for on their Hangover show, just silliness including Ashton hitting his hand many times on ring posts and that object where you stub cigs out on. T-Bone invite audience members to hit Ashton in the stomach which they duly onliged until Athers (Joe Atherton) poked Ashton in the eyes via the top of his head - OH JOE YOU HEEL.

End of the match came when T-Bone used the Go To Sleep knee on Ashton to get the 1-2-3 to end the hilarity to send the 40+ crowd home happy.

Overall a fun show and definetely enough there to keep me entertained. Certainly Kirby vs Birch and the Main Event if they see the light of day are ones you should see.

Beer prices - £4 for a can of Magners, £4 for 300ml Budweiser (Multipack bottles - SHAME)

Next part will be later on with what happened in the evening at The Ballroom #grapsandclaps