#(someone cancelled work then texted me saying if i was free if i could come but i didn't see the text until two hours later and it was over)

[muffinpink02]

Co-Host part 3

Part 1 here

Part 2 here

Part 4 here

Warnings - Smut

Three months had passed.

And both girls were miserable.

They were miserable with themselves, but when they were together they were in heaven, a miserable heaven. The girls had kept their arrangement to just sex. No staying over, no feelings mentioned, no ‘what are we?’ Not even cuddles after sex.

But now and again they would linger after sex, they, talk about shows, friends, plans. They laughed and spoke about anything and everything. But nothing about the situation.

It was bitter sweet, it felt so good but it would never last long.

Leah and Lucy had kept up the game of fuck buddies for three months, but we all know that game doesn’t last without someone catching feelings.

Especially when the feelings were always there. And only getting stronger.

The only thing that hadn’t been mentioned was other people.

It was as if a silent agreement had been made between the pair. Neither girl was  sleeping with anyone else, wasn’t seeing anyone else.

For now.

—————

Lucy pulled up her jeans, she looked around Leah’s room for her bra.

“I have a date this weekend.” The blonde blurted out, she was naked on the bed. Leah watched Lucys face for any sign of emotion.

Lucy stopped as she was pulling her shirt over her head. She turned slowly to Leah, the brunettes face was hard to gage, she didn’t look thrilled but she didn’t look sad either.

“Oh, okay. I guess you wanna stop this then?”

Leah opened her mouth but nothing came out. Yes, she wanted to stop this, she wanted “This” to be more than what it was, she wanted to talk. She wanted Lucy for more than just sex.

“I don’t have to go.”

Lucy looked over at Leah. “Why would you do that?”

“I don’t know.”

“Who’s the date with?” Lucy wasn’t looking at Keira.

“A mutual friend, my friend’s been pushing me for a while to go on a date with her.”

Lucy stared at Leah in her vanity, there was so much she wanted to say but she didn’t.

“Right well, I guess this is us done. Enjoy your date.”

Lucy didn’t give Leah time to respond, she couldn’t. She could feel her chest tightening up, her legs felt like they were going to give in.

Lucy walked out of Leah’s house, the tears were streaming down her face. She felt like a knife had stabbed her in her heart a thousand times over.

Leah sobbed in her pillow, she didn’t want this, she didn’t want to loose Lucy. She said yes to the date to mostly get her friends off her case. She was never planning on really going, she was always going to cancel it.

She also wanted to see how Lucy would react to the news, but she didn’t get the reaction she wanted.

A small part of her hopped Lucy would say she should cancel, that they should go on a date. She wanted Lucy to hold her and tell her she’s more than a booty call, more than whatever this is.

She wanted so much more, but this had been going on for months, clearly Lucy didn’t want anything more, she made that very obvious in the beginning of all of this and very obvious now.

—————-

A couple of days had passed, and the girls hadn’t spoken since that night. Leah had looked over their messages, they mostly consisted of ‘need a hand’ or ‘free for fun?’ she wanted to text Lucy. She wanted to tell her to come over, carry on with their agreement. But she knew it wasn’t working, she was only hurting herself.

So she decided to go on the date, she wanted to try and see if she could get over Lucy. She didn’t want to feel this way anymore, she wanted Lucy but Lucy didn’t want her that way.

Lucy had cried everyday since that night. She wanted to tell Leah how she felt, that she didn’t want her to go on the date. She wanted to be the one to take her out, she wanted to show her how much she wanted her for more than just sex.

She knew what they were doing was stupid, she hated that she made out like that’s all she wanted from Leah. Lucy just wanted to protect herself from getting hurt. Leah leaving her in the hotel made Lucy put up a wall, and Lucy was good with her walls.

————

Saturday rolled around and Leah slowly got ready for her date. She was forcing herself to go. She had nearly cancelled about 100 times over. But she knew she couldn’t keep this up with Lucy, it was breaking her. But it didn’t stop her from thinking about the brunette constantly.

She decided on wearing a cream skirt and a black vest top, with a smart jacket. She wore her hair down with a slight curl. She went with light make up, finishing off the look with a pair of black heels.

She made her way to the bar, not feeling excited or nervous, in all honesty she felt empty but she knew she needed to push herself.

—————-

Leah was standing outside the bar, she took a deep breath, put on a smile and made her into the bar.

She spotted Claire at a table, they had met a couple times before through their mutual friend. They greeted each other with a hug and started their date.

Claire was cute, she was intelligent, funny and a genuinely nice person. Leah was polite, she laughed at her jokes, she asked questions, she listened to Claire talk about her work. But it wasn’t what she wanted, she wasn’t Lucy.

A couple hours later and three drinks in the date came to an end. Claire clearly didn’t notice Leah was checked out.

“So did you want to go to another bar? Or come back to mine? I live 10 minutes down the road.”

Leah blinked a couple of times before she opened her mouth.

“Oh erm, I can’t. I have training early tomorrow. I erm, yeah sorry. I’ve had a great time though.”

Claire looked deflated but she smiled at Leah. “Oh, no that’s okay, I had a lot of fun. Get home safe.”

“Yeah, you too.”

Leah watched as Claire walked away, she felt bad, she really did, but she hadn’t stoped thinking about the brunette. She pulled out her phone.

Leah - I need a hand

Lucy replied instantly.

Lucy - what about your date?

Leah - I wasn’t picturing them fucking me, I was picturing you

Lucy - I’ll be there in 10

Leah - I’m closer to yours, I’ll come to you

Lucy - okay

Leah hailed down a black cab. Gave the address and she was on her way.

Once again Leah knew this wasn’t right, but Lucy almost felt like a drug to her, she needed her, she needed to feel her, smell her, taste her.

She pulled up to the house, she paid the cab  driver and thanked him. She walked up to Lucy’s door, ready to knock. But the door swung open.

Lucy stood there in her grey tracksuit bottoms and a black T shirt, looking as fuckable as ever.

Leah grabbed her by her T-shirt and pulled her in for a deep, hard kiss.

Lucy didn’t think twice, she pulled Leah in closer to her, more than happy to have the girls lips against hers. The kisses were desperate and heated, both fighting for dominance.

Lucy pushed Leah hard against the front door, causing it to close. She attacked Leah’s neck, biting hard against her skin. After months of sharing each other beds, Lucy knew exactly what Leah liked and didn’t like. She knew how to make her scream, she knew how to make her body shake and how to make her pussy squirt.

She sucked hard on Leah’s neck, loving the whimpering noises coming from the blonde. She would normally make sure not to leave any marks on show, but tonight she didn’t care. Lucy wanted to leave marks all over Leah’s body. She wanted to leave her marked up for everyone to see, she wanted Leah to be hers.

Leah could hardly breathe, Lucy was taking over her senses, she could feel her teeth and tongue sucking hard on her neck. She knew she was leaving a mark but she didn’t care. She would let Lucy do whatever she wanted to do to her tonight, because she was going to do everything to her.

“Your room.” Leah breathed hard.

Lucy grabbed Leah by the hand and dragged her down the hall to her room. Leah didn’t wait around, she started to pull Lucy’s T-shirt over her head. Lucy began to pull Leah’s skirt over her heels.

Both girls wouldn’t take their eyes off each other, their bedroom antics were always hot and heavy but tonight felt extra intense, more desperate. It was like they hadn’t seen each other in months. Both girls were breathing hard, pulling at each other clothes.

Lucy had stripped Leah down to her underwear. The blonde was wearing a very sexy red lace set that Lucy hadn’t seen before. The brunette wondered if they were new, or had she bought it for her date?

Leah bent down to take her heels off.

“No, leave them on.”

Leah smiled wickedly at Lucy.

She pulled Lucy by her girl boxers towards the dressing table, she dropped to her knees looking up at Lucy through her lashes.

Lucy felt herself getting wet, she had seen Leah in this position plenty of times now, but something felt different tonight.

Leah began to kiss up Lucy’s thighs, she felt Lucy lean back on the dresser, she looked up to see Lucy’s intense green eyes on her.

She slowly pulled down Lucy’s boxers, she could see she was wet, her lips were glistening. Leah felt her mouth water at the beautiful site, she thought she’d never get to see Lucy like this again.

Lucy tucked her fingers in Leah’s hair, slowly pushing the strands out of her face.

Leah leaned forward and took a slow, delicate lick from the bottom of Lucy’s lips to the top, not actually dipping her tongue in. She wanted to taste every drop of Lucy before she began.

Lucy’s fingers stroked Leah’s scalp, causing the blonde to shiver. She leaned herself forward taking another long stroke at Lucy’s lips, dipping her tongue into her wet folds.

Lucy hissed at the touch, she had been turned on the minute Leah texted her. Like Leah, she didn’t think she was ever going to really see the girl again, let alone in this position.

Leah moaned at the taste of Lucy, she lost count how many times she had Lucy juices on her tongue but she still couldn’t get over how good she tasted every time.

Lucy began to slowly grind her hips into the blondes mouth, she couldn’t take her eyes off of Leah. She looked incredible on her knees, and the heels were an extra sexy cherry on top.

Leah began to suck Lucy’s clit just the way she liked it, she moved her tongue slowly but firm over the bud of nerves. She felt Lucy grip her hair, her hips began to move faster into her mouth. Leah was amazing with her tongue, Lucy could watch her do this all day,

“Fuck you look so good Leah. Did you wear those for me or your date?”

Leah laughed internally. So, Lucy was jealous?

She moved her mouth with a loud, wet popping motion, Lucy wetness was all over her lips.

“Is someone jealous?”

Lucy smiled smugly at Leah. “How can I be? You’re on your knees for me .”

Leah smiled, she kissed Lucy’s wet lips, closing her eyes as she did. She took another long lick from Lucy’s pussy. Causing the brunette to jolt. Her hands gripping tighter in Leah’s hair.

Leah continued. “Do you like it?”

Lucy chuckled breathlessly, her head tilted to the side as she watched Leah. “Yeah, you should wear red more often. It looks good on you.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.” She winked at Lucy, and went back to her task at hand. Sucking Lucy’s sensitive clit into her mouth.

“Fuck.”

Lucy’s head titled back in pleasure, she loved it when Leah was cocky, it turned her on like there was no tomorrow.

Leah sucked and licked at Lucy’s pussy, the girl was wet, her juices and Leah’s spit were starting to drip down the blondes chin, slowly making its way down her neck and chest.

Lucy could feel her climax coming, her stomach began to tighten, she pushed herself deeper onto Leah’s tongue. She grabbed Leah’s hair into a pony tail, grinding her hips into her mouth. Small moans escaped the brunettes mouth, she felt her legs start to shake.

Leah worked her tongue hard, wanting to give Lucy everything she needed. She could hear Lucy’s breathing quicken, she could feel her thighs shaking. She sucked and licked at Lucy’s throbbing clit, while she thrusted into her face.

“Fuck Lee, just like that, just like that. Yes, baby don’t stop.”

Leah loved it when Lucy called her by her nickname, it made her heart flutter, it would always spur her on.

Lucy fucked Leah’s face, her orgasm began to take over her body. She looked down one last time at Leah, she would never get over how good she looked on her knees for her like this.

Her orgasm was powerful, she moaned loudly as she continued to fuck Leah’s face. Leah sucked on Lucy’s clit, feeling Lucy push her head deeper between her legs, Lucy’s hands gripped at her hair.

Leah licked at her folds as she came in her mouth, she could feel Lucy’s wetness seeping down her tongue. She didn’t want to waste a drop of it, swallowing what she could.

Lucy breathed hard as she moved Leah’s head from her legs. She looked down at the blonde to see her own juices string from Leah’s mouth to her pussy.

She looked so fucking good.

“You drive me crazy Leah.”

Lucy’s voice was low, she sounded desperate.

Leah stood up on her heels, she could feel her underwear was soaked. But she wasn’t done with Lucy.

“I want to fuck you. Go lay on the bed.”

Lucy smiled, she did what she was told and laid on the bed.

Leah knew where Lucy kept all their toys, they had built quite a collection over the three months. They each had their own dildos, many different sizes and colours.

Leah strapped herself up, she had Lucy’s favourite 7 inch dildo on.

Lucy waited patiently for Leah, she watched the blonde getting herself ready. She loved it when Leah took charge, Lucy had taken on more of a dominant role in their sexual activities but she loved how versatile they both were in the bedroom.

Leah took off her heels, as much as it was hot she needed to have her balance.

She knew Lucy was wet but she lathered the dildo up in lube. She approached the bed, Lucy was watching her, she could tell she was excited, it had been a little while since they used the strap on her.

Leah climbed on the bed, not once taking her eyes off Lucy. She crawled up to the brunette, kneeling between her strong tanned legs. She placed her hands on Lucy’s knees, that were now shaking.

“Open your legs for my baby.”

Lucy opened her legs without hesitation.

Leah pressed her body against Lucy’s, their faces were nose to nose, the dildo was touching the brunettes thighs. Leah kissed her gently, she loved having Lucy like this, it was rare to see the girl so vulnerable.

She began to kiss Lucy’s neck, with gentle kisses. She knew it was one of Lucy’s turn ons, whenever her neck was touched in any type of way, she became putty in Leah’s hands.

Lucy’s breathing began to quicken, she couldn’t stop to small groans coming from her mouth. She could feel herself getting wet again.

Leah smirked. “I love it when you make that noise.” She breathed in Lucy’s ear.

Lucy bit her lip, her head moving to the side.

Leah continued. “You ready for me Luce?”

Lucy nodded. Not trusting her words.

“Good girl.”

Lucy eyes fluttered from Leah’s words, she like Leah, had a little praise kink.

Leah held the dildo in her hand, slowly easing it into Lucy’s cunt. She knew Lucy could take it but she would always go slow. At first.

Lucy let out another groan, Leah began to kiss her neck again as she pushed herself into Lucy’s tight pussy, she could feel even feel through the strap that she was tight.

She loved being close to Lucy like this. It felt so intimate, like Lucy was giving her all of her, no walls up, just them.

She pumped her hips slowly, loving the small whimpers coming from the brunette. She stayed on her neck, kissing and sucking on Lucy’s skin.

“Fuck Lee. You feel so good.”

Lucy felt full, her pussy already began to throb, she began to move her hips with Leah’s rhythm.

Leah’s hips moved faster, happy enough to feel Lucy was already comfortable. She pushed deeper into the brunette, bottoming out with the strap, Lucy let out a mess of groans and moans, her body trembling under Leah.

“You make the best noises Luce.” She sucked on Lucy’s neck.

Leah began to take deep, long strokes, working her stomach and legs. She watched as Lucy’s face was taken over by pure pleasure.

Lucy’s hands glided down Leah’s back, she reached for her arse cheeks and grabbed hard, causing the blonde to moan.

Leah’s hips moved faster, mouth still on Lucy’s neck, Lucy’s perfume was taken over her senses, the brunettes moaning was dripping into Leah’s ears. The brunettes moans pushed Leah to go faster and deeper.

“Fuck, fuck, Leah, oh my god.”

Leah loved fucking Lucy like this, she loved when the girl was unable to form any kind of sentence just from the pure bliss of Leah’s hips.

Leah pushed herself on her knees, wanting to switch the position. She pushed Lucy’s right knee up, pushing the strap even deeper into the girl.

Lucy couldn’t hold the high pitched whimpers coming from her mouth. Leah was fucking her so deeply it almost took her breath away. She gripped the sheets needing something to hold onto while Leah fucked her into not knowing her own name.

Leah didn’t hold back, she pumped her hips at a rapid pace, fucking Lucy like it was the last thing she would do on earth.

She looked down at Lucy’s perfect body, watched as the strap glided in and out of her wet pussy, her juices everywhere covering the top of her thighs. Her body was glistening in sweat from how hard Leah worked her.

The noises coming from between their bodies was almost criminal, wet skin slapping was echoing throughout the room, nearly drowning out Lucy’s whimpers.

“You take it so well Luce.” Leah’s voice was rough from her movements. “You take my dick so well. Do you think I should let you cum?”

Lucy’s eyes were closed, she could just about form a coherent sentence, but she knew Leah would stop her movements if she didn’t try.

“Please Leah, please make me cum.”

She thoughts about her next words carefully.

“I - I, fuck. I’ve missed you Lee.”

Leah wasn’t expecting to hear that. Lucy’s voice sounded small. She didn’t stop her movements, she couldn’t. Not now.

“I’ve got you, I’ve got you Luce.”

Leah placed her hand under Lucy’s chin, making them look hard at each other. It felt like a blanket of sadness had hit both of them.

Leah snaked her hand down Lucy’s body, watching Lucy’s face. She reached her very sensitive clit. As soon as her finger brushed over it Lucy whimpered loudly, grabbing on to Leah’s hand behind her knee.

“Lee please, please.”

Leah began to draw tight circles against the bundle of nerves, earning her more high pitched whimpers from the brunette.

Lucy’s mouth began to gape, making that beautiful face Leah loved to see. Her face seemed to let go of every emotion she had that day and would turn into pure ecstasy.

Lucy’s body began to shake, her whimpering stopped, alone with her breathing. Leah felt her body tense up, her abs clenched, Leah swore she felt Lucy’s walls pull on the strap.

She came hard, her hips thrusted against Leah’s fingers, trying to get everything she could. A half moan, whimpering noise left her mouth. She looked beautiful.

Leah slowed her movements, pumping slowly into Lucy. Once she could tell Lucy had finished she lowered herself to Lucy’s face. She kissed her lips gently, then moved her lips down to Lucy’s neck, kissing her sweat soaked skin.

“Lee, Leah. I …. fuck, that was…. Wow.” Lucy chuckled.

Leah smiled against her skin. Lucy’s walls always came down in moments like this, showing a much softer side to her that not many people got to see.

Leah kept her hips moving, pumping slowly into Lucy. She wanted to go another round, she took Lucy’s hands in her own and raised them above Lucy’s head.

Lucy began to whimper again, Leah kept her  movements slow and deep. She sucked on one spot on Lucy’s neck. Lucy squirmed underneath the blonde, her body was clearly taking a lot but Leah couldn’t help herself, there was something about fucking Lucy like this that was her own selfish pleasure.

“You going to take me some more Luce? I know you can.”

Lucy breathed hard, her hands shaking under Leah grip. She was stronger than Leah so she could push her off if she wanted to, but there was no doubt in her mind that she wanted everything that was Leah right now.

“Yeah, but go slow, I’m so sensitive.”

“I will baby.” She kissed Lucy’s lips, slipping her tongue deep into the back of her throat. Lucy moaning in the process.

“I’ll always look after you.”

Leah’s whole body was skin to skin with Lucy’s, their skin stuck to each other from their sweat. Leah pumped into Lucy with deep strokes, the moaning coming from Lucy was delicious.

Leah could feel her own clit throbbing, she knew she wouldn’t get off like this but watching Lucy take her so well was driving her own orgasm close.

She kept Lucy’s hands above her head, but moved her right hand down south. It was a tight squeeze between their bodies but she made it work.

As soon as she touched the older girls clit, Lucy gasped in her ear. She rubbed softly this time, knowing Lucy was extremely sensitive, she pushed hard but rubbed small gentle circles on her clit.

Lucy held her breath, she was in another world, her body was already exhausted but she felt amazing, her pussy was pulsating hard around the dildo. She could feel her orgasm approaching already.

She came again, her body jolted hard, her muscles twitched. Lucy let out a silent moan, her skin burning under Leah’s hot sweaty body. She felt like she was about to pass out, her body was shattered, drenched in sweat, her chest heaved heavy with her breathing.

Leah kissed her forehead and gently pulled out of her. Lucy gasped from how sensitive she was, holding Leah’s hips and she moved back.

Leah stripped out of the harness, making her way back to the bed, collapsing on her back, next to Lucy, breathing hard.

Lucy chuckled. “Are you trying to kill me? I can’t feel my body.”

Leah giggled. “I can’t help it, you’re just so fuckable.”

Lucy rolled her eyes, laughing at Leah’s words.

“Well you’re going to have to give me a minute. I can’t move.” Lucy breathed out.

“Hmm you don’t have to move.”

Leah pulled herself up, crawling up the head board of Lucy’s bed, she ducked down next to Lucy’s ear. “Can I ride your face?”

Lucy groaned, she loved Leah sitting on her face. It was one of her most favourite positions. Lucy nodded fast , she didn’t need to be asked twice.

Leah smiled and lifted her leg over Lucy’s chest, shuffling herself just above Lucy’s chest.

Lucy had seen Leah wet before, but she had never seen her quite like this, her thighs were dripping with her own wetness. Her lips were soaked in thick juices. Lucy was in her own heaven. A Leah heaven.

Leah held on to the headboard, slowly lowering herself, she was so turned on her pussy was throbbing in pain. She felt Lucy’s breath hit her wet lips, sending shivers up her spine. Leah had worked herself up, she could already feel her legs shaken from anticipation.

Lucy snaked her hands up Leah’s firm thighs. “You look so good Leah. You’re so wet.”

Leah let out a small rough chuckle. “Luce, your breath is tickling me.”

Lucy raised her head and gently kissed Leah’s lips. Some of Leah’s juice stuck to her lips, she licked her mouth, finally getting to taste her favourite flavour again.

“You’re wet everywhere Lee, let me clean you up.”

Lucy greedily licked up at Leah’s thighs, licking up the wetness off her skin.

“Fuck.” Leah closed her eyes and let out a shakey breath

Lucy gently pulled her down to her awaiting mouth. She took a long, strong lick through Leah’s lips, groaning as she did.

“You always taste so good.” She took another quick lick. “I could eat you out all day.”

“Fuck Luce, your mouth. I lo- ahh.

Oh my god.”

Lucy captured Leah’s swollen clit into her mouth, she sucked gently on her bundle of nerves. Loving the noises coming from Leah’s mouth.

Leah groaned loudly, her eyes rolling back into her head, Lucy knew exactly what Leah liked. She began to lick quick strokes between Leah’s velvety folds, she could hear how wet Leah was.

Leah loved Lucy’s tongue, she loved how she could use it. She moaned as she felt Lucy take what she wanted from her, moving her tongue around in tight circles on her sensitive nerves.

Leah began to gently grind her hips into Lucy’s mouth, moaning as she did it. She looked down at Lucy, her eyes were closed in full concentration. Leah dipped her fingers into Lucy’s hair, loving the feeling of her soft hair between her fingers.

She pulled Lucy closer to her pussy, grinding harder into her mouth. She loved the control she had in this position, loved taking what she wanted, loved that Lucy also loved it.

She started to feel her climax bubble, her legs began to shake, her breathing came out in small raspy bursts.

Lucy pulled Leah in closer, roaming her tongue all over Leah’s folds. Leah’s wetness was drenching Lucy’s face.

“Fuck Luce, I’m close, I’m going to cum.”

Lucy kept up her movements with her tongue, sucking perfectly on Leah’s clit.

Leah kept her hand in Lucy’s hair, guiding her head, fucking her mouth gently. Lucy moaned at the movement, moaning on Leah’s clit, giving her that one last push.

She felt her orgasm take over her body, the blonde let out a low moan, rocking her hips into Lucy’s mouth.

“Luce, Lu- fuck, fuck, don’t stop.”

Lucy could feel Leah’s wetness gushing into her mouth, dripping down her chin. She grabbed the girls arse, pushing her into her mouth, wanting to get every drop of the blonde.

“I can’t eve- ….. your tongue. Fu-…”

Leah leaned forward against the headboard, keeping herself from crushing Lucy. She could feel the brunettes beautiful tongue ease her down from her high. Her breathing was hard, her chest rising and falling, trying to catch her breath.

She felt Lucy start to lick at her cunt again, but she couldn’t take any more, not in this position anyway.

Leah let out a breathless giggle. “No, I can’t. I can’t take it.”

She moved off of Lucy, rolling on to her stomach next to the brunette, she looked over to see Lucy’s face was smeared with her wetness. She smiled at Leah with that smile Leah loved.

“Ergh you look so good like that.” Leah smiled at Lucy.

Another blanket of sadness hit Leah, she wished this was something she could have without the dread of knowing it would end.

Lucy laughed, her eyes roaming up and down Leah’s body.

“Go get your strap.”

Leah felt her pussy clench. She rolled off the bed to their toy box. She got her favourite strap, fixing it into the harness, ready for Lucy to wear.

Lucy sat up taking her harness from Leah, putting the harness on with ease.

“Face down, arse up.” Lucy smiled wickedly at Leah. She knew this was Leah’s favourite position to be fucked in.

Before Leah could go to the bed, Lucy grabbed her by her wrist and pulled her in for a gentle, but extremely passionate kiss. Leah was more than happy to be kissed by Lucy but the kiss felt different, it felt like there was something behind it.

Lucy turned Leah around, she guided Leah to the bed, kissing her neck and back. Leah was in heaven, Lucy was always gentle with her, she never made her feel like she was being too rough even if they were dominating with each other. But Lucy was showing a bit more of a softer side, and Leah was confused but didn’t question it.

“You ready Lee?” Lucy ghosted Leah’s ear.

Leah stuttered. “Yeah, so ready. Feel me.”

Leah grabbed Lucy’s hand and guided it to her pussy. Lucy groaned at the wetness between Leah’s lips.

“Is that all for me baby?”

“Yes.”

“Good. Get on the bed and bend over.”

Leah bent over on the mattress, feeling Lucy guide her by her neck. She felt the dildo bounce on her arse and between her thighs.

She felt Lucy push at her legs, Leah automatically opened them wider. She could hear Lucy squeezing lube on the dildo, she arched her back, her head between her own arms, the familiar smell of Lucy’s lavender sheets flooded her nose.

She felt Lucy slide the head of the dildo up and down her entrance, she could feel her pussy getting wetter.

Lucy slowly pushed the head of the dildo into Leah, watching it go in, inch by inch.

Leah held her breath, feeling the dildo stretch her out.

Lucy noticed. “Relax your body Leah.” She stroked Leah’s spine, making the girl instantly relax.

“Good, thats it.”

Lucy pushed herself in until her thighs were skin to skin with Leah. She held on to Leah’s hips as she slowly pumped her own hips, not wanting to go too fast, she knew Leah had to get used to the girth of this strap.

Leah panted hard, she was grateful Lucy was going slow, her body was still adjusting to the pressure of the dildo.

“You look so good Lee, you always look so good.” Lucy stroked Leah’s back, in a soothing motion, making Leah shiver.

Leah whimpered softly, she slowly backed her hips to Lucy, giving Lucy the green light to move faster.

Lucy did just that, she pumped her hips a little faster, one hand still on Leah’s back.

Leah let out a louder whimper, the dildo rubbing against her tight walls, she could feel her pussy throbbing around the plastic.

“So you thought about me tonight? While you were on your date? Fucking you like this?”

Leah groaned, Lucy always spoke to her when she had her in this position. Lucy would normally tell her how good Leah was being for her, or how good her pussy looked or how well she could take her.

She could make Leah say anything she wanted, and Leah knew what Lucy wanted to hear. It was the truth after all.

Leah stuttered. “Ye - yeah. I thought about you all night.”

Lucy’s movements got quicker.

“You thought about me fucking you.”

“Yes. I thought abo - about you fucking me.”

“That’s naughty Lee, what about your date? Was she not good enough?”

Lucy began to pump harder. Her breathing became hard, but Leah knew the brunette could keep this up for hours if she wanted. The girl never got tired.

Leah held on to the sheets, she couldn’t control the movements anymore, this was all Lucy, she had a strong grip on her waist, controlling their movements.

Leah just about got the next words out.

“Sh- she, she wasn’t …I wan- … you. I want you Luce.”

“You’ve got me Leah.”

Lucy pulled Leah up by her hips, her chest was now against Leah’s back. She kissed Leah’s neck, holding her chin up, still pumping into her.

Lucy whispered in Leah’s ear. “You’ve got me Lee.”

Lucy snaked her hand down between Leah’s legs, circling tight circles on her clit. The girl was drenched.

A loud whimper escaped Leah’s mouth, she was so overwhelmed, a fuzziness consumed her brain. Lucy was saying things she didn’t think she’d ever hear her say. She put her hand behind Lucy’s neck, wanting to feel as close as she could to the girl. It was the most intimate she’d felt with Lucy since the hotel room.

“I’ve missed you Luce, I….fuck… I’ve missed you so much.”

Lucy felt a pain in her chest, she wanted to tell Leah how much she wanted her, how much she wanted to be hers. She held the girl tighter to her chest.

“I’ve missed you too. I want you Lee.”

“I want you Luce.”

Lucy didn’t know how she was keeping up her movements considering her mind was going a millions miles per hour. She kept up her pace, she began to kiss Leah’s neck again, kissing right up to her ear.

“I love you like this, you’re so pretty when you cum, are you going to come for me?”

Lucy had never said the word love in any sentence before and definitely not in the bedroom. Leah heard it straight away. It felt like they were pushing the invisible line more and more.

She could feel her own legs shaken now, her belly started to coil. She held on to Lucy tightly, wanting nothing but her, wanting to feel her as close as she could.

Lucy could hear Leah was close, she wanted her to feel as good as she made her.

“Thats it Lee, you’re so close. Let me hear you. I love hearing you, I love the noises you make. Fuck you feel so good.”

The words pushed her to the edge, Leah let out an animalistic moan, her body was shaken, her orgasm was intense, shattering through her body. She felt Lucy pull her tighter as her body went limp.

Leah opened her eyes, trying to catch her breath. “Oh my fuck, Luce…. Fuck.”

When Leah feels herself coming down from her high, she feels Lucy lips against her skin. Bring her back to her senses.

She kissed Leah’s shoulders gently, while she slowly pulled the strap out of the blonde.

Tiredness took over Leah’s body, she laid down on her front, exhausted from their activities.

Lucy took off her harness, watching the blonde on her bed. She crawled on the bed next to Leah, kissing her back as she moved herself up the bed.

Goosebumps ran over her body, she was sensitive all over, Leah giggled at the touch, letting out a contempt sign.

“I wanted to eat you out again.” Lucy husked  into her ear.

Leah groaned, feeling butterflies dip in her stomach.

“You don’t stop do you? Give me 2 minutes I just need to catch my breath.”

“Not when you look that good.” Lucy chuckled lying next to Leah. She easily moved the blondes body, so she could spoon her, getting as physically close as she could.

Within minutes sleep took over the pair.

A few big rule was broken that night.

—————-

Leah woke to feel a warm sensation on her back, she was confused at where she was, she’d never woken up in Lucy’s before.

She felt the warm sensation move, she realised it was Lucy’s chest against her back. She realised she fell asleep, that was something they agreed they wouldn’t do.

Shit.

Lucy felt movement next to her, making her wake. She opened her eyes to see Leah’s blonde hair, smelling her familiar shampoo.

The sun beamed in through the curtains, Lucy realised what was going on. She felt conflicted, she wanted nothing more than Leah to be here, be next to her but she knew Leah didn’t want that.

She backed herself away from Leah, giving the girl space.

Leah felt the coldness hit her back. She knew Lucy must have woken up, she’s giving Leah a hint to leave.

Leah feels tears prick at her eyes but she holds them back. She doesn’t want Lucy to see her cry.

She slowly gets herself up, her eyes darting across the room for her clothes. She dresses quickly, not bringing herself to look at Lucy.

She’s fully dressed, she looks over at Lucy who’s been watching her the whole time.

“Erm, sorry about this. I didn’t mean to fall asleep. I must have passed out.”

It hurts Lucy that Leah didn’t mean to stay, or didn’t want to stay. It honestly was the best night sleep she’s had in almost a year.

She pulls the covers up to her chest covering herself. “Ah no it’s fine, I better get on. I’ve got training anyways.”

It’s a bad lie, she doesn’t have training and Leah knows that. So it hurts even more to think Lucy can’t even make up a half decent fib to get Leah out of her way.

Leah bites her lip, she goes to say something but she just nods and walks out.

Lucy pulls the covers over her head, as she hears her front door close. Once again losing Leah.

——————

Lucy texts Leah on Monday. She didn’t want sex, she just wanted to see Leah. She wanted to talk. She wrote what she knew best.

Lucy - needing a hand

It’s what they always text, nothing more, nothing less.

Leah - sorry I can’t, busy

It was the first time either of them had ever said no.

She stared at her screen, Lucy felt her hands shake, she felt so stupid. How could she have thought Leah wanted her, after all these months the blonde didn’t ever indicate that she wanted anything more, so why now?

She made her way to her in home gym, taking out everything on her punching bag.

It had been two weeks since they last saw each other. Two weeks since they last spoke. Lucy had been a wreck, she had hardly spoke to anyone. Keeping herself to herself.

She was flicking through Netflix when she heard her door go, for a brief moment she wondered if it was Leah.

She made her way to the front door, she opened it but it wasn’t Leah. It was Keira.

The look on her face must have giving away something to the shorter girl.

“Oh nice to see you to. Can I come in?”

“Yeah, sorry. Come in.”

Keira walked in to the familiar home, she made her way into the kitchen, Lucy followed behind her.

The younger girl sat at the island, looking at Lucy.

“Put the kettle on then, gosh have you lost your hospitality manners?”

Lucy laughed, no matter the mood she was in Keira always knew how to make her laugh. She put the kettle on, grabbing two tea mugs from the cupboard.

Lucy put on a brave face, she knew Keria was here to tell her off about her lack of communication with her and the girls. She knew she was ignoring the chat, she just didn’t feel like talking to anyone lately. Not since Leah.

“Right come on, what’s going on? And don’t try and lie. You know, I’ll know.”

Lucy looked at Keira, she wondered if she could tell her. They had been broken up for over a year, but would it not be awkward? In all honesty she needed someone to talk to, and Keira was her best friend, she needed her.

“Well, it’s about Leah.”

“Yeah I know.”

Lucy’s eyes bulged out of her head.

“What?”

“Yeah, you two are seeing each other. I’ve seen both your cars parked outside each others multiple times.” Keira smiled smugly at Lucy.

Lucy shock her head. “It’s more complicated than that.”

Keiras smiled dropped, she could hear the pain in Lucy’s voice. She’d obviously got this wrong.

“Right, put the bags in, talk to me.”

Lucy explained everything to Keira, from the charity event, up to the last text. Leaving out their sex details, they were close but nobody needed to know about their ex’s sexual activities.

Keira took a finishing sip from her mug, looking at Lucy with soft eyes, she felt sorry for Lucy but god was she an idiot sometimes.

“That explains a lot to be honest. God Lucy you are daft sometimes.”

Lucy screwed up her face. Why was she daft? Did she not hear what she just said?

“What, why?”

“She clearly likes you! Why on earth would she do this for so long just for a botty call? God even botty calls have more of an emotional side than what you guys have going on.”

Keira looked at Lucy with her serious face. “Come on Luce, please don’t let your walls treat Leah like this, don’t treat yourself like this. Of course she likes you, you’re likeable when you want to be.” She smiled softly at Lucy.

“I think you both need to talk, it sounds like there’s no talking going on. And even if she doesn’t want anything more than sex with you, do you really think you deserve that?”

Lucy looked at Keira, tears threatened her own eyes.

“No.”

“No, you don’t. But in all honesty I think she really likes you, sort this out Luce. Stop being so afraid, they don’t call you Tough for nothing.”

Lucy rolled her eyes at the ginger girl, chucking at her words.

“Right, I’m off. No more ignoring the chat, don’t go and roll under the covers, and do not take it all out in the gym. We’re here for you.”

Lucy hugged Keira, she loved the girl so much, even if it wasn’t in a romantic way, she would always have love for her.

“I won’t. I’m sorry. Thank you Keira”

Keira walked out the front door. Looking back at Lucy as she opened her car door. “Fix it Lucia”

The shorter girl drove off, leaving Lucy to sort out her shit.

——————

Leah scrolled through tiktok, when she heard her door go. She wasn’t expecting anyone, she looked through the fish eye to see who it was. She nearly dropped her phone. It was Lucy.

She hesitated to open the door, she’d spent those last two weeks trying to forget the girl, trying desperately to ignore the pain.

Trying to forget all the feelings she had for the brunette.

She opened the door to see a very nervous looking Lucy, a look she’d never seen on the girl before.

“Can we talk Lee?”

“Erm, yeah, sure. Come in.”

Lucy made her way in, she waited for Leah to lead the way. She took them into her living room, she motioned for Lucy to take a seat, she then sat as far as she could form the brunette.

“Well firstly, I’m so sorry for how our last chat went. How this has all happened.”

She paused. Trying to find the right words.

“Lee, I like you, I really, really like you. I’ve not really known how to go about it because I know you don’t feel the same, and that’s fine. But I don’t want you to think I’m like this. I’ve hated this arrangement, the rules we’ve had, only texting when we want sex. And I know I basically made those rules, and I hate myself for it. I’ve just tried to protect myself from you because I know you don’t want anything more than that, and I just didn’t want to loose you, even if it meant hurting myself.“

She looked at Leah, she could feel own eyes flooding with tears.

“And I just can’t do it anymore, it’s killing me, not being able to be with you but I need to stop this, I just can’t do it anymore.”

Lucy let out a long sigh, looking everywhere but at Leah. She was ready to be told ‘thanks but no thanks.’

Leah couldn’t believe what she was hearing. Lucy wanted her, she wanted Leah, she’d always wanted her. She didn’t think Leah wanted her. Wow. What a classic example of stupid lesbians.

Leah started to cry herself, she still had so many questions, and of course those hurt feelings don’t just disappear. They clearly needed to talk but she couldn’t help but feel a sense of relief, Lucy wanted her, Lucy actually liked her.

“Lucy, I’ve wanted more than just the sex, I’ve wanted to be with you. This has been so hard. I - I was scared to say anything because of what happened at the hotel, I was just scared. I freaked out that day. I know I shouldn’t have left with out saying anything. I know what’s why you thought I didn’t want anything more, but that’s not the case at all. You made me feel so comfortable, just being with you, I felt like I could really be myself. Even though these last couple of months have been hard, I’ve still loved every moment I’ve shared with you.”

To say Lucy was shocked was an understatement. She could feel her heart pounding hard, Leah wanted her, for more than just sex. Lucy felt a weight come off her shoulders, a small bit of hope creeping in.

The girls stared at each other, both with sad smiles on their faces, tears rolling down their cheeks.

Lucy let out a disbelieving laugh. “Wow, I can’t believe us.”

She looks at the floor, her eyes watering up.

“So you’re telling me, we both liked each other this whole time? Well I mean I hope you liked me in some way. But I mean we both wanted more?”

Leah laughed through her tears, wiping her face.

“What a pair of idiots, I guess we were just scared to lose something we both desperately wanted.”

Lucy nodded. “Can we hug?”

Leah couldn’t hold back the smile. “Of course.”

The girls held each other for a couple

of minutes, just feeling the embrace from the other. They hadn’t actually hugged before now, it felt completely right.

“I want to take you on a date.”

Leah stepped back, looking into Lucy’s eyes.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. I want to start over, if you’re up for it?”

Leah smiled, she wrapped her arms around Lucy’s neck.

“I’d like that.”

“Good, I also want to hold off on sex for a while. I think we should go slow. I know this had all been a lot.”

Leah nodded she would of course miss the sex but knew it was right, they needed to go slow.

They ended up watching a few films, before Lucy headed home.

Leah walked her to the door, smiling so hard her cheeks hurt.

“I’ll see you for our date then?”

Lucy smiled, all her teeth were on show.

“Definitely.”

They kissed for a couple of minutes at the door. A whole new feeling running between both girls.

“I need to stop, or I’ll break my first rule I’ve made.” She bit her lip, staring at Leah now swollen kissed lips.

They said their goodbyes at the door, as hard as it was. She needed to plan her date.

#woso soccer #women’s football #woso #woso community #woso smut #lucy bronze #lucy bronze smut #woso fanfics #woso couples #leah williamson smut #leah williamson

[scekrex]

Okay, hope I'm doing this right, but can you do an Adam x male reader where the reader is an angel who doesn't has wings and is Adam's assistant, and Adam ends up falling in love with him. Also, can you make it smutty since there's barely a lot of 'em.

Don't ya worry hun, ya did it just fine, here's assistant!reader x Adam w a very happy end

Reach out and touch faith

pairing: Adam x male!reader

warnings: language, blowjobs

note: not beta read bc fuck you I don't have beta readers

Adam didn’t know when this all had started, when his tummy had started to feel funny when he was around you. You were supposed to be his assistant, someone who would do the lame and boring work so that he could continue to enjoy being the first man and not bother with the work Sera gave him. And yet he grew quite fond of your company over time. By God, he even found himself disappointing whenever you canceled boys-night. A thing Adam had invented once the both of you grew attached.

Tonight was yet another boys-night you had to cancel, a thing that happened more often than you liked it, but as Adam’s assistant there was a shittone of work to do, especially since Sera knew you’d tear off a limb in order to hand in paperwork on time. Fucking bitch. Adam was not very amused about the fact that you couldn’t hang out tonight, it had been a couple of weeks since he had seen you on boys-night. It wasn’t like he wasn’t hanging out with you after work, that man spent every free second with you as long as time allowed it, but boys-night excluded other people. Boys-night was a you and Adam thing. It was very dear to the first man, though he’d never say that out loud. So the second he got your text that you couldn't make it, he left his apartment and headed for your office. It only took him a couple minutes to barge through your door.

You flinched at the sound of the door hitting the wall and when you looked up you expected many people, but surely not Adam. “The fuck you mean you can't tonight?” the first man asked, he was visibly pissed by the fact that you had work to do. You tried to offer him a smile but he wasn't having it at all, he crossed the room until he stood in front of your desk, his hands slammed down onto the white wood and he hovered over you. “You’ve been canceling this shit for weeks, are you fucking avoiding me?” At that you had to chuckle - oh please you couldn't even avoid you even if you would try. You liked him too much to avoid him - too much to consider him just a friend. But that was the closest to him you could get, a friend, a homeboy. And maybe that was enough, it was certainly more than just being his random assistants he only talked to because he needed to. And yet you longed for him and while Adam had made it quite clear that he was not gay, you felt like he longed for you in the same way. Though that was probably just his thing, the possessive, flirty behavior was simply Adam. Right?

It was normal for colleagues to bond over physical touch, wasn't it? In the beginning Adam had strictly avoided touching you, not because he thought of you any less but because he didn't know you. Soon the both of you grew closer though and with that came cuddling. He often wrapped his arm around your shoulder whenever the both of you had to attend a meeting with Sera, it grounded the both of you. And sometimes - when you work until you pass out at your office - he'd come in late at night and carry you home. Your way home was quite long and due to your lack of wings it took you longer than the other angels.

The wing situation. Another thing that Adam had been surprisingly gentle with. Of course the first man had cracked jokes, now more than ever given that you were friends now - cose friends even. But he had always been quite sensitive with the topic itself, in God's mighty name, he even defended you a couple of times when strangers were to comment on it. I mean it was Adam, most of the time he flipped those people off and yelled at them to go fuck themselves. But he stood up for you and that was what counted in your book. He stood up for you when you kept quiet and you were quite thankful for that - even if he did that in his own adamish ways.

“I’m not avoiding you, dingus,” you rolled your eyes at the brunette who had taken his mask off in order to look at you properly. A huff came from the taller man hovering over you and your desk, “Yeah? Then why the fuck do you keep cancelling boys night? I only ever get you when fucking Lute is around.” But he liked Lute, didn't he? What was the problem with Lute being part of the group? Confusion clouded your eyes heavy enough for Adam to notice, even in his rage - but was it truly rage, or was it anger that only burned because fear fueled it? “Adam I don't understand the problem we're having, we still see each other daily, I-” Adam interrupted you by slamming his hands on the table loudly, causing you to flinch away from him a little. “It’s not about how fucking often we see each other, shithead, it's about when and where we fucking see each other,” his words only caused more confusion on your side, what was his deal? He knew you had a shit ton of work to do, mainly because he and his behavior was causing all this work in the first place. You sighed, “Look I'd rather chill on your couch too, eat shitty food and watch a fucking boring movie, but I can't okay? Sera will murder me if I don't get all of this shit done by tomorrow.” Adam's eyes roamed over your desk as if he was considering something and with a swoop of his wings all the papers that had been sorted through fell to the floor. “The fuck?” you asked surprised and annoyed. It had taken you ages to sort through every sheet of paper and now you had to start all over again. Adam reached for your chin, forcing your eyes to look at him instead of the mess he had just caused. Again. “We’ve known each other for a fucking while now, babes,” he hummed as his eyes took in your face as if it was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. Behind cool golden eyes flames were burning, flames hot and bright enough to set your own on fire. “You keep slippin’ away from me and I don't fucking like that,” you had made your own fair share of experiences with Adam and his possessiveness but this felt different, more intense, more real. “Adam, I should-” but yet again the first man wasn't willing to let you finish your sentence. “You should shut your fucking mouth and come home with me, you've worked enough for today.” - “But Sera-” Adam huffed, he was clearly fed up with how things played out and he pulled you closer, forcing you to not only get up from your chair but also to lean over your desk, you inhaled sharply as his face was suddenly so close to yours. “Sera can suck my fucking dick. I say you're done for today.”

Your brain was going wild, there was no way you could respond to his words, it was all a buzz. You felt like someone had wrapped your body in cotton. It felt soft and warm and yet not quite enough. Your eyes were focused on his, golden orbs staring into golden orbs, his expression was serious, left no room for debating things while you were still surprised, lips slightly agape and eyes wide. You wanted to lean closer, to capture his lips with yours and fight with your tongue against his, knowing well that he would win. But you didn't, you couldn't. Your body was frozen in place, still trying to process how close your face was to Adam's.

Being physically close to the first man wasn't new at all, Adam was quite touchy, resting his arm on your head every now and then, wrapping his wing around your back when watching movies at his place. But being so close to his face? That was new and that was clearly something your brain struggled to keep up with. Something in his eyes shifted as he took in your facial expression and it took you a little too long to recognize the emotion that was suddenly on display. Desire.

“Adam I'm being serious, you just caused more-” No. No, Adam was done listening to your excuses. All he wanted was to spend the evening with you, to relax and forget about the sometimes stressful days in heaven. The hand that had been holding your chin in place tightened a little just to pull you in all the way. You let out a surprised gasp as you almost crashed down onto the table, however his wing stopped you from doing so, the soft feathers pressed against your chest to keep your body up while the other wing of his was being wrapped around you. His lips were onto yours and despite your expectations the kiss was surprisingly gentle and slow. You had always taken Adam for the type of guy that would kiss women like they were a five star rated meal, eating them up greedily. But you weren't a woman and Adam's kiss was gentle - so maybe you should throw your expectations aside.

The first man was eager to deepen the kiss, clearly aíming for more, but you pulled back. Confusion was written all over your face. The kiss had been pleasant and warm and had lulled you in immediately. Yet you didn’t quite understand why. “Adam?” you questioned and you watched as the confidence in his eyes faded and was slowly replaced by uncertainty. It wasn’t that you didn’t want him to continue the kiss, maybe even deepen it, but you also wanted answers. Was this some one-time thing? Or was he looking for more, something more permanent, something that would go beyond just having sex? “Can you- fuck,” he pushed his hair back in frustation only for it to fall back into place, covering his forehead. “Can we just fucking leave and go home already?” And you wanted to tell him no, wanted to madly tell him that he had just created so much more work when he had pushed all the documents off your desk. But you were tired and Adam’s warm breath on your face felt like a promise, a sickly sweet promise that there would be more than just a kiss - if only for the night or for all of eternity suddenly didn’t matter anymore as you closed your eyes and leaned in again, your lips meeting his to dance with each other yet again. His feathers tickled your chin and you breathed out a laughter that bled into the kiss. This time it was Adam who parted from you instead of the other way around and when he did many emotions laid heavy in his eyes. Trust, desire, comfort, want and love. “Adam I can’t leave, I have work-” “You clearly need to fucking relax, babes, “ he hummed as he stepped around your desk, just to push you down into your chair. Perplexed, you looked up at the first man towering over you. With wide eyes you watched as the brunette dropped to his knees in one fluent motion, his hands were quick to undo your pants and you yelped in surprise as his wings lifted up your body in order to get rid of the fabric, revealing an arching hard erection. Adam shot you a proud grin, you simply rolled your eyes at him, “Don’t interpert too much into it, I haven’t had sex in- oh holy fucking shit,” you interrupted yourself with a loud moan as Adam’s lips wrapped around your penis without a warning and you threw your head back against the backrest of your chair, the gigantic wings made sure you stayed in place.

Confidence reflected in his eyes as he watched you react to his actions, his surprisingly skilled tongue played with the tip of your dick, licked your slit and effortlessly turned you into a whining and moaning mess. If this was Adam’s way to make you relax, you definitely wouldn’t mind him dropping by more often. Sure, you’d probably get even less work done, but who cared about that now, you certainly didn’t, not with your dick shoved down Adam’s throat. The first man moaned around your erection, sending shivers down your spine, his golden eyes were focused on your face, he wanted to see every little reaction of yours, didn’t dare to miss even the slightest bit of desire that was written on your face as he started to move his head up and down your shaft. Your hands clenched down onto the armrests of your chair, nails leaving scratches on the leather that covered them, oh dear lord have mercy. Your eyes were closed and yet Adam felt like you were looking at him with just as much adornment as he held in his eyes for you and only you. Was this how he had thought your first sexual interaction would play out? No, definitely not, but he didn’t mind it at all, not when you were the most divine looking creature he had ever laid eyes onto, and for the record: Adam had seen God himself before so that meant something.

“Adam,” you cried out as you felt your orgasm approach, you knew it had been quick, knew that you lacked the amount of self control it would’ve taken you to keep you from coming undone, it had simply been too long since your last sexual interaction involving someone else and the fact that it was Adam on his knees for you, Adam who you have had a crush on ever since you had first met him, Adam who had always been making jokes about fucking your brains out or giving you the head of your life - well, afterlife - only made it harder to resist. “Adam, ‘m-” With a popping sound he pulled back from your dick, he quickly licked his lips, drinking in every little drop of precum that had stained them so far as he responded, “Fucking let go then, this shit isn’t about holding back.” And then he dove in again, the pace was quicker than before, sloppier as well and with the knowledge that the first man’s only goal was to push you over the edge, no matter how soon that might be, you did as he had told you to and let go, your body physically relaxed underneath Adam’s touch and only a moment later the brunette felt your dick twitching violently against his tongue before he tasted the salty liquid. The taste of cum was gross, Adam wasn’t going to lie about that and it certainly wasn’t the reason why he swallowed it down. He swallowed your load because he wanted to take what you had to offer, no matter how gross it might taste - besides, cleaning it off the floor later wouldn’t be better so he might as well keep the surroundings as clean as possible.

The brunette pulled back yet again once he was sure you were all spent, licked the tip of your dick clean, then his very own lips. His warm hand gently patted your thigh which made you look down at him through hooded eyes, a small yet very thankful smile was on your lips and the brunette couldn’t help but smile back at you. “Feeling better, babes?” You only managed to hum in agreement, too tired to properly respond, as Adam got up from his knees and lifted you off the chair as if it was the easiest thing he’d ever done, “Good. So can we go home now?” You simply nodded as you wrapped your arms around his warm, comfortable body. You weren’t sure when Adam had dressed your lower half again, nor were you sure when he had carried you out of the building, your eyes kept falling shut and you obviously struggled to stay awake. “Get some fucking rest while I fly us home,“ was all you heard before you finally fell fully asleep in Adam’s arms as the cold air of the night surrounded your body, yet Adam’s body heat kept you warm.

#hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel adam #adam x male reader #male reader #adam x y/n #adam x reader #adam x you

[cirilla-fiona-riannon]

TWO LOVERS DRENCHED IN DEVOTION

Alternate title: Soaked Sweethearts

This is simply a fan translation of the game. Translations may not always capture the exact nuances or tone of the original text. Expect grammatical errors.

I turned my gaze outside the window upon hearing the sound of the rushing wind.

(It's windy today.)

I stopped sewing and watched the trees sway.

Kicho: "Mai, can I come in?"

Mai: "Sure. Something smells nice."

Kicho: "I made some tea. How about taking a break together?"

Mai: "Okay. Thanks!"

Putting my sewing kit back on the shelf, I sat with Kicho at the table, and he gracefully poured tea into the teacups.

(Being alone with my lover like this is so blissful.)

Kicho: "Are you really that happy?"

Mai: "Huh? Did I say it out loud?"

Kicho: "No, even without saying anything, I can tell just by looking at your face."

(It must have been obvious that he could tell so easily.)

Kicho: "Why are you turning to the side?"

Mai: "Because I'm embarrassed about having my feelings read."

Kicho: "It's too late to be feeling shy now."

Feeling my cheeks getting warm, I took a sip of the warm tea he handed me, and a sweet, familiar scent tickled my nose.

(Huh?)

Mai: "This has honey in it, doesn't it?"

Kicho: "Yeah. I remember seeing someone drizzle it into tea back in the future."

Kicho: "Do you like it?"

Mai: "Yes, I can even savor the aroma."

Kicho: "I see."

(If he wasn't here, I wouldn't be able to drink it in this era.)

With every sip, the sweetness of the honey soothed my heart.

Mai: "It's delicious. Can I have another cup later?"

Kicho: "Of course. I added it to make you happy. Feel free to drink as much as you want."

(Ah, he smiled.)

My soft gaze met his emerald eyes, and my heart beat faster.

Mai: "This tea tastes even better because I'm sharing it with you."

Kicho: "……..."

Kicho: "You really say the cutest things."

Gently, he reached his hand out and stroked my cheek.

(Hehe. It tickles.)

Mai: "By the way, it's rare to see you taking a break at this hour."

Kicho: "One business negotiation got canceled."

Mai: "So you came to see me in your free time?"

Kicho: "Of course."

(He's so straightforward.)

Heat spread to my cheeks again with happiness and embarrassment.

Afterward, we exchanged plans for the week and engaged in small talk while enjoying the tea.

(Since we’re both busy, it looks like it’ll be just another ordinary day.)

That’s why sharing a warm cup of tea and talking like this felt so precious.

Kicho: “Mai, how about going somewhere on our next day off?”

Mai: “Really? Okay!”

Kicho: “Then choose where you want to go.”

Suddenly, a knocking sound interrupted our conversation.

Subordinate’s voice: “Excuse me. Lord Kicho, are you here?”

(It seems like he’s looking for Kicho.)

Kicho: “I’m here. What is it?”

Subordinate’s voice: “We need you to handle an urgent matter at the port.”

Kicho: “I’ll be right there.”

Subordinate’s voice: “Yes, sir.”

Kicho stood up and returned the tea set to the tray.

Mai: “Are you heading to the port now?”

Kicho: “Yeah. I’ll probably be home late.”

Kicho: “By the way, about our previous conversation, think about the place you want to go.”

(Even though he’s so busy, he still cares about me.)

Mai: “Okay, I’m looking forward to it.”

Kicho: “Yeah, me too.”

I saw him off as he left the room, then returned to work.

(I wonder where we should go on our outing.)

A few hours later一

(I did a great job today.)

Having completed my work quota, I stretched my body and realized that the outside had already become completely dark.

As I turned on the lights, it started to rain.

(Come to think of it, Kicho went to the port.)

(It’s raining. I hope he’s okay.)

(He said he’d be late, so I should probably bring him an umbrella and pick him up.)

I hurried out of the room and bumped into someone with a thud.

Kicho: “Mai, where are you going?”

Mai: “Kicho? You’re back?”

Kicho: “Just now.”

(He’s not drenched.)

(I’m glad he made it back to the trading post before the rain started. But...)

Kicho: “........”

His expression was so tense.

(Did something happen?)

Kicho: “I’ll be working late tonight. You should go to bed first.”

Kicho: “I’ll be in the reception room, so if you need anything, just call me.”

Mai: “Okay.”

I nodded, and he walked away.

(I'm curious, but I guess it's better if I'm not by his side tonight.)

The next afternoon, I left the room to go to the market to buy some fabrics.

(In the end, I couldn't see him this morning either. I wonder what happened after that.)

As I left the room, I heard whispers from the end of the hallway.

Kicho's Subordinate 1: "Is that true?"

Kicho's Subordinate 2: "Yeah. It looks like there's a spy targeting Lord Kicho among those who visited the trading post."

(What!?)

The unexpected words left me breathless.

(A spy targeting Kicho? Who on earth?)

Even after his subordinates left, I couldn't move from that spot.

Kicho: "Mai."

Mai: "........."

I snapped back to reality when someone called my name.

I looked at the source of the voice and saw Kicho staring at me.

Mai: "Are you being targeted by a spy?"

Kicho: "It looks like you already heard about it."

Mai: "Yes. Is it true that there's someone in this trading post who is after you?"

He frowned and let out a small sigh.

Kicho: "I have such information, but I still don't know who the spy is."

Mai: "So, it's true after all."

Kicho: "Sorry for surprising you. But don't worry, it will be over soon."

Kicho: "You can continue to live normally without any concerns."

(I understand that he's trying to reassure me, but...)

I couldn't nod sincerely because his tense expression from last night crossed my mind.

Mai: "Is there anything I can do to help?"

Kicho: "Don't try doing anything stupid. Besides, I'm pretty good at finding spies, especially those from Azuchi."

He chuckled, and I pursed my lips.

Mai: "Are you talking about me!?"

(I want him to take me seriously, not make fun of me.)

Just as I was about to try again to offer my help一

Kicho: "Are you really that worried?"

Mai: "Eh? Ah..."

I felt my feet gently lift off the ground.

With one arm holding me, he opened the door to my room.

(Whoa!)

As soon as he entered the room, he closed the door behind him.

Kicho: "There's no need for you to be anxious."

Mai: "Nnn..."

He embraced me in his arms, and our lips met abruptly.

(Why did this happen so suddenly?)

He slowly slipped his tongue in and entwined it with mine, slowly melting me.

Unable to stand, I collapsed into Kicho, and the arm around my waist supported me.

Kicho: "No matter what happens, I will never let any harm come to you."

Kicho: "I'm currently investigating the identity of the spy, so it's only a matter of time until I find out."

Mai: "Ah…nnn…"

He deepened the kiss as if to reassure me.

(No, that's not it.)

(What I'm worried about is not myself, but him.)

He's a kind person, but it's true that he has earned some resentment through his past actions.

(If something happens to him…)

Even thinking that, my objections were sealed with a kiss, preventing me from saying a word.

Kicho: "It's about time."

He whispered this reluctantly and released his arm from me.

Breathing out a sigh, we gazed at each other, and someone knocked at the door.

Subordinate: "Lord Kicho."

Kicho: "I know."

Kicho: "Then Mai, I'll be going now."

After lightly stroking my head, he disappeared beyond the door.

(I couldn't convey anything.)

I was left standing there, my cheeks flushed.

The next day, after finishing my errands and leaving the shop一

(Huh? You're kidding, right?)

Part 1 ╎ Part 2 ╎ Premium ╎ Epilogue

#ikemen sengoku #ikesen kicho #ikesen kichou #kicho #ikesen #ikesen jp #ikesen translations #cybird

[jackharloww]

Jack has been really stressed at work lately, so you plant a picnic date for the both of you in your backyard

“Neelam, I’m not mad; I just don’t get why they changed the date again,” Jack spoke on the phone with Neelam, who apparently just told him that an interview got pushed forward. You could clearly tell he was frustrated. He was walking around the house, his eyebrows slightly furrowed. 

“This is not the first time it happens. We had to change a lot of things for this shit” his face was starting to get red; you could tell how much this bothered him. The first time they changed the date, he had to cancel a dinner with someone important, and he also had to move an important photo shoot, and now they want to change it again. 

While you were sitting in the kitchen, trying to work on your laptop, Jack was distracting you. You knew how much this bothered him; he hated when he had to cancel, and things didn’t work out the way they should. 

“There’s not much to talk about,” he sighed into the phone, running his hand through his hair. 

“Okay fine, I’ll come. Yeah, see you; bye” you heard him say, ending the call. He walked over to you and let out a big sigh. 

“Come here, babe,” you said and opened your arms. He bent down and burrowed his head in your neck, inhaling deeply. 

“I need to go to the office to go over my schedule,” he let out a big huff. You played with his hair, trying to get him to calm down. 

“Okay, baby, do you want me to come with you?” You asked 

“It’s okay; I won’t be that long, hopefully” he shook his head and stood up straight. 

“I love you,” he said and bent down to kiss you. 

“I Love you too” you gave him another deep kiss before he went to get dressed. After just a few minutes, he was out of the house. 

An hour passed, and you finished your work and got up to do some cleaning. You checked your phone and saw that Jack had texted you. 

Jacky boy ❤️ - This took longer than I thought. I’ll let you know when I’m on my way. 

Poor baby, you thought. This was supposed to be his free day; your plan was to chill and do nothing all day. You went outside to the backyard and got a perfect idea. You wanted to do something cozy for Jack.

You went to the store nearby and bought everything one could need for a picnic before going home and setting everything up. You put a blanket on the grass in your backyard and a picnic basket with Jack’s favorite snacks. And now you only had to wait for him to come home. Just 10 minutes after you heard your phone go off, an incoming FaceTime call. 

”Hey babe, I’m on my way home now. Do you need anything?” Jack said as soon as you answered. 

”No thank you, just come home,” You said with a big smile 

”Why are you so giddy?” He asked as a smile formed on his face

”Just come home,” You said with a giggle

”Alright alright, see you soon babe,” He said and blew you a kiss. 

After 15 minutes you heard the front door open and quickly ran up to greet Jack. 

”Miss me that much?” He smugly said as he reached down and kissed you, putting a hand around your waist and the other on your ass. You nodded eagerly and deepened the kiss.

”Come, I have a surprise for you,” you said and held his hand. ”I would hold my hands over your eyes but you’re a giant so you need to close them,” you told him making him laugh at your comment. He closed his eyes and walked behind you as you dragged him. 

”What kind of surprise?” He asked feeling impatient

”You’ll see. No peeking” was your only answer as you continued to drag him to the backyard

You were now standing in front of the picnic and you let go of Jack’s hand. 

”Taddaaaaaa” you said and motioned your hands to the setup. You looked at Jack who looked at the picnic and then at you, with the biggest smile ever. 

”You did this for me?” He asked gently 

”You’ve been so stressed lately, you need this,” You said smiling at him. He looked at you with a lot of admiration in his eyes before he pulled you in for a big hug. 

”You are so thoughtful, thank you,” he mumbled and kissed your head before you both sat down and began snacking away.  

Jack laid his head on your lap as you played with his curls. You were both laying there talking about anything and everything, a perfect way of spending the rest of the day. 

#jack harlow #jack harlow x reader #jack harlow fluff #jack harlow concepts #jack harlow x y/n #picnic #jack fic #jackharlow #jack x reader #jack harlow imagine #jackman thomas harlow #jack harlow story #harlow #jack harlow stories #blurb #fanfic

[f10werfae]

Hiii, Can I do a request with Henry Cavill?

Here’s the situation, yesterday was my birthday and from 15 only came 4 (all of them had already confirmed that they’ll be here and also they gave a “joke” gift and made feel really humiliated) I want Henry comforting the reader in that situation. Because God knows that hurt soo much and I really wanted someone to comfort me. Angst but with lotsss of fluff please 🥰🥰🥰

Birthday Cake ☁️

Pairing: Boyfriend! Henry Cavill x Reader

Word count: 1,863

Summary: Request tells all ☺️

Warning: Slight Angst in terms of the reader being humiliated, other than that it’s fluffy

(Hope I fulfilled the request ☺️)

—————

Requests are open!

Likes, Comments and Re-blogs are appreciated♥️

—————-

(Y/n's P.O.V)

'jeez y/n you are lookin fine tonight, 26 and still gorgeous’ I said to myself, my hands running up and down my dress clad body, this dress had definitely boosted my confidence. For the first time in weeks I had finally gotten a week off of work, BUT for a very good reason, it’s my birthday week.

(The dress)

Henry and I decided to celebrate just him and I later on during the week, allowing for my friends and I to go out tonight. A dinner at the restaurant, followed by a few drinks at the club.

For the first time in weeks, I felt pretty and happy. Something work had very much bogged down.

I had already received a gag gift if you will, from these friends and honestly I didn’t know how to feel at all. They had decided to gift me a massive cardboard cutout of one of Henry's exes, writing on the back “the original”

Now of course when I saw it I laughed it off, but deep inside I knew that they had hit a massive insecurity of mine.

Trying not to be rude I just stored the cutout in my clothes closet, thinking of the best time to throw it at the dump.

When all of a sudden a ping of texts vibrated my phone from the nightstand, it slowly shifting with each sound, interrupting my train of thought. Humming to myself I walked over to the table, instantly seeing a flood of notifications from the group chat.

The Girls 🍷

Stephanie: Hey Y/n, looks like I can’t make it this week, just found out my boyfriends throwing a party and you know i’ve just gotta keep an eye on him

Monica: Yeahh that’s what I was coming here to say, today’s date is just really inconvenient for us to be honest. Hannah told me to say she can’t make it either soz xx

Leah: Y/n let’s reschedule another time?

Chloe: Yeah soz can’t make it, promise next year tho yeah? 😂😂

Y/n: I don’t get it? I asked you guys if you were free today?

Chloe: Don’t get an attitude Y/n jus cus its ur bday

“From 6 to 1, within 5 minutes” That genuinely must be a record for me.

Looking at myself in the reflection, all energy and confidence, gone. Huffing out, I grabbed my phone again, deciding to phone up the reservation at the restaurant, the one Henry had made for me.

(Phone Call)

Random: Hello this is ** Restaurant, how can I help you?

Y/n: Yes hello, uh I’m calling about the reservation for Cavill, at 6:30pm?

Random: Ah yes, hello Mrs Cavill, the reservation for 6?

Mrs? I swear Henry needs to stop introducing me as his wife, it’s going to make me blush to a point where it’s permanent

Y/n: Yeah unfortunately something has came up, so would I be able to cancel the reservation. I’m so sorry about this

Randomer: Oh no, it’s not bother Mrs Cavill, thank you for calling to let us know

(End of Phone Call)

Putting down the phone, I could not be bothered to even get unready, deciding against it and heading towards the kitchen.

Pulling open the fridge, I picked up my chocolate cake and set it onto the counter. Getting up to grab a fork, and sitting back down again, my feelings still numb.

Without thinking I started stabbing the cake with the fork, whilst continuously scooping parts into my mouth. Tears unwillingly slipped down my cheeks, my vision clouded.

Why am I always the one left in the end? Even on my f*cking birthday and all I wanted was to see my so called “friends”

Sooner or later it’s going to be Henry leaving me, I can already feel it.

Then it’ll just be me, again.

I guess you could say my thoughts are a stretch, but in times of hardcore emotion, it’s hard to control the type of thoughts you get.

In the middle of a massive bite of cake, there was a series of rapid knocks at my front door. Wearily I walked over, opening the door, to see Henry?

“Bear?”

(Henry’s P.O.V)

Sitting with the lads at the club, I watched the clock mindlessly. Y/n had sent me out for the night so she could have her girls night, but honestly I didn’t mind, I know how much she’s been needing something like this.

When it finally reach 6:30, I suddenly had the idea of calling up the restaurant to send her table a batch of their finest wine. If I couldn’t be there for her, I will be there another way.

(Phone Call)

Random: Hello this is ** Restaurant, how can I help you?

Henry: Hi there, I’m asking about the Cavill reservation?

Random: Yes the one your wife cancelled tonight?

Henry: She cancelled it? Why? When?

Random: At around 5:30? She said something had come up, sir.

Henry: Okay thank you, bye

(End of Phone call)

“Who was meant to be there tonight?” I said out loud to myself, leaning my head back.

“Ah yes stephanie” I said to myself, instantly going to her instagram to see a new story was put up.

what the hell was going on, why was all of

Y/n's friends out at this dude's party? Where was Y/n?

Instantly standing up, “I gotta go lads, somethings up”

Hearing a chorus of goodbyes, I jumped into my car and drove back home; Y/n's car was still in the driveway and the lights were on in the house. Knocking on the door rapidly, my heartbeat ringing in my ears.

“Bear?”

(Y/n's P.O.V)

“W-what are you doing here?” I asked, swallowing the last bit of cake in my mouth.

“I should be asking you that babe, why are you not out?”

“This is why” I said passing him my phone, seeing his face start to furrow as he read through the group chat texts.

“Oh pup, i’m so sor-“ Hearing his voice, I could feel the tears starting to build up again, rushing to his arms for comfort.

His arms instantly surrounding me, his lips pressing kisses to my head.

“Why didn’t you call me? You know I would have taken you out instead” He said cupping my face to look at him, placing another kiss onto my nose.

“I-I just didn’t wanna look like a loser with no friends Hen” I said sniffling, wiping my tears with the back of my hands, before his hands pulled mine down. Wiping my tears with his thumbs, he placed soft kisses on my rosey cheeks.

“You’d never look like a loser to me love, you deserve much better than those people you call friends. How about this, lets get you more comfortable and we can have a night to ourselves?”

“Yeah okay” I said smiling slightly, seeing his eyes peer down at me with so much love.

“You look absolutely amazing tonight, lord have I got the hots for you” Henry said laughing slightly, slapping my ass as we walked up the stairs to our bedroom, giggles being heard along the way.

“Alright i’m going to pick you out some soft pyjamas, you just sit down on the bed and don’t do anything. Tonight is all about you”

Nodding my head, he walked into our closet before walking back out again.

“Why is my ex in our closet? With that written on her” He said looking at me confused.

“Oh the girls gave me that as a gift, nice right” I said sarcastically, seeing his face fall again. “Those b*tches, love I cannot stand to see you with them again if they’re treating you like this”

Henry pulled the cutout out, folding it smaller and shoving it into the corner beside our bin where he claimed it “belongs

Walking back into our closet he pulled our our matching velvet pyjamas, putting his set on first before walking over to me.

“Sorry Hen, I know you were out with the lads tonight” I said putting my hands in the air as he helped pull the dress off me, his hands unclipping my bra for me, before putting on the warm pyjama top.

“Sweets I can go out with them anytime, your birthday is once a year”

He held the trousers out for me, letting me step into them before patting my thigh softly, then standing up to his full height again.

“Meet you down at the sofa okay? i’ll be two minutes”

“Ok but don’t take too long bear, might miss you too much” I said winking at him, feeling myself starting to lighten up a bit.

Heading downstairs to the sofa I sat down, turning on the T.V to put on anything for background noise. Hearing Henry grunt, I turned my head seeing him carrying at least two comforters and five pillows in his grasp.

Just before throwing them all on top of me before running back upstairs again, leaving me to settle into the pillows and blankets, transforming the sofa into a massive bed.

Running back down the steps, he jumps in next to me, putting a box in my lap with a number “1” written on it. His arm going around my waist to pull me into his side, his lips kissing my temple, his hand tucking the hair behind my ear.

“What is this bear?”

“It’s your first gift of course, out of 26”

“Are you serious? 26?”

“Well yes, now go on, open it poppet”

Untying the ribbon, the box fell apart into its different layers, photos throughout our relationship littered the sides.

“Oh Hen” I started, tears brimming my eyes, but for a good reason this time.

The first photo, however, caught my eye bringing a bright blush to my face as I picked it up. Henry's fingers tracing shapes into my side as he watched my reaction.

“H-hen when did you take this?”

“Well, you were just so cute, snuggly and warm. At that point I just fell more in love with you babe”

The picture was that of Henry and I in bed, specifically me laying half asleep on his chest after a very intimate night. My eyes looking up at him, half open, my breasts hidden by his hand reaching the whole way around me.

“I don’t know what to say bear”

“How about 'cake?' “

“Oh yeah, there’s some in the kitchen if you want” I said caressing his bearded face, his hands playing around with the hair on my neck as I turned towards him.

“Okay i’ll be two seconds then love” He said getting back up and returning with the whole cake platter and a fork in his hand.

“Open wide” He said, getting a piece of cake onto the fork, before feeding me it.

“Do you not want a bit?” I asked confused.

“Oh i’ll get some, dont worry love” He said quirking his brow at me, before smashing his lips onto mine. The kiss getting passionate as he set down the plate, his kisses getting slippery and more heated with him then pulling away.

“Red velvet cake? Almost as sweet as you baby”

#henry cavill rpf #henry cavill x reader #henry cavill imagine #henry cavill fanfiction #romance #oneshot #henry cavill

[safetycar-restart]

KINKTOBER DAY 25: COLLARING [FABIO QUARTARARO X READER]

NOTE: This is an NSFW fic with sub!Fabio and dom!reader. If you are under 18 or uninterested, scroll past. Alternatively, if you like what you see here then consider checking out my blog :))

This work forms part of a kinktober series where I discuss a different kinky concept with a different motorsports athlete every day. We also discuss the concepts in more detail on my blog so if you have any thoughts, feel free to stop by!

(I added this day JUST so that I could write this fic because Fabio's pearl necklace has infected my brain and now it's everyone else's problem)

Fabio has always been interesting in submitting, and he's had many doms before you (not all of whom treated him well by the way, but that's a whole other fic). But it wasn't until you that fabio really understood collaring.

He's always enjoyed submission, always felt better when he had someone to take care of him. But it wasn't until you that he actually wanted to belong to someone. He didnt just want to submit to you, he wanted to be yours. Always. He doesn't stop being yours when the scene ends. He is yours, he can't just turn it off.

And he LOVES when you make him feel owned outside of scenes too, so so much. When you text him to ask if he ate breakfast and then call him a good boy when he says he has, or when you take him his hand and lead him somewhere, when you give him a forehead before he gets on the bike. He just... he feels so warm and fuzzy and safe and like he belongs to you, and it's the best.

So obviously, collaring comes up in conversation.

I think it would start as putting a collar on him during scenes, and fabio LOVES it. His collar is his prized possession, and he never ever scenes without it. But, he hates taking it off?

It's just a simply black collar with a little gold ring in the front, and fabio adores it. He feels so good when he wears it, like he's truly your sub and the best boy ever.

He goes through aftercare with the collar on of course, you'd never take that off him before he's ready. But eventually the collar does have to be removed, because he can't exactly go out with that collar on.

And every single time, he feels so bad? Even when he's 100% recovered from the scene and is perfectly okay, the moment you go to take his collar off he's whining and crying and begging you not to. It breaks your heart because you have to take it off. He'll spend the next hour or two in your arms, sniffling every now and then as he tries to recover from not having your collar on anymore.

You have to talk to him about it of course, and you're so worried because you see how distressed he is when you have to remove his collar and you begin to wonder if the enjoyment of the collar is really worth it when he reacts like this at the end.

Fabio just breaks when you say that, because no? No, no you gave him a collar! You cant take that from him now.

"Was I bad?" he asks, voice so small, "what did I do wrong? Please don't take my collar, please please I'm sorry."

You try to comfort him and explain that you're just worried about how distressed he is when you have to remove the collar, and you think that's cancelling out the good feelings he gets from the scene.

Fabio is quiet for a moment, and then he just softly asks, "I just don't want to take my collar off."

That's the first time you consider permanently collaring fabio, and you don't know if he's ready for that commitment. But you decide to ask him, because your poor sub is so sad.

He shoots up the moment you ask, "Really? You'd collar me permanently?"

You tell him that you would, that you'd find a nice day collar that he'd never have to take off, that you'd be honoured for him to wear your collar full time. You've barely even finished the sentence before you've got a sobbing fabio in your arms, clinging to you and mumbling his thanks over and over again, unable to stop because he can be collared full time!!

Fabio expects the collar to be a simple necklace, or maybe a small strip of leather. But you refuse to tell him anything, promising him that you'll give it to him the moment it arrives.

Not even for one moment does he expect the collar to be a pearl necklace.

When you show him, he just stares in wonder. You... it's so pretty?

"Of course," you tell him, "only the prettiest for my pretty boy."

Which... now you have a sobbing sub in your arms again BECAUSE PRETTY PEARL COLLAR!!

You put it on him and he's so happy. For the rest of the night he's always bringing his hand up to his neck to double check that the collar is still there. It's absolutely perfect for him, and he couldnt be happier with his collar.

Now when he scenes with you, there's no panic when it ends because his collar will always remain on.

And he's also so much more confident in general? Cause he's owned now! He's officially your good boy at all times.

#kinktober tag #sub!fabio #fq #fabio quartararo x reader #fabio quartararo imagine #fabio quartararo #motogp x reader #motogp imagine

[strangelittlestories]

Today I plan to tell you That I love you.

The words lurk all day Lurching, lost, round my stomach Rattling up my throat Occasionally threatening To rock up early And open themselves to strangers.

I keep them on track Barely.

Finally, After dinner, (Vodka fog from ill-advised cocktails  Thickening in my eyes) I open my mouth Heart pumping pure sincerity And what comes out (those sweet three little words) is:

“I hate buses.”

“What?” You’re not angry (Yet)

“I really mean it.”  This is true. But in a minute My brain will catch up to my heart.

“What?!?” You repeat. Louder. Amused, but perturbed. The bartender is watching us Like dinner theatre.

Currently, this is an amusing non-sequitur. I could brush this off Let the ill-timed thought wend  its lopsided way onwards And this will be a cute anecdote.

Instead, I run after it. I chase that thought down Like I am fleeing justice.

“The thing about buses, right? Is that you never know when they’ll turn up.”

“There are literally schedules On the bus stops.” You reply, Carried along in the slipstream Of my accelerating rant.

“Schedules are at the mercy of traffic And traffic is god of chaos That calls judgement down from uncaring skies In a blare of horn honks. Don’t talk to me about schedules.”

“*Fine*. I won’t.” The tenor of that ‘fiiine’ Is a warning light. I ignore it.

“Buses turn up when they feel like it, They always take longer than you think (Because - again - traffic exists And none of us are free of sin) They don’t go where you think half the time, There is So Much Waiting And every part of the journey Is out of your control. I would rather walk for hours, I would rather cancel plans, I would hire an e-scooter Even though I think they’re Very Silly Rather than take one bus. I’d say that buses are my own personal hell But at least with hell, I know I will *get there* And I’ll be on time.”

“Sweetheart…” You say. And the warning light in your voice Flashes red Klaxons are sounding Someone is calling the president And texting their family To tell them - ironically, given how this started - That they love them. “...what the *flip*?”

I puff myself full of indignance Ready to let these fiery feelings Run their route When the right words Finally wend their weary way To my stop. I deflate And flag them down.

“I got a bus here.” I say. “Even though I hated it. I repeatedly get buses to see you Because you live far away Near no good transport And it’s quicker than walking. Just.”

“What are you trying to say?” You take my hand And it’s like you know The map of me.

“I don’t know my own feelings Most of the time. They roam where they will They keep no schedule They conform neither to the laws Of gods nor mortals

I spent a lot of time waiting for them When I was young And eventually I worked out I’ll only know they exist When they’re taking me somewhere. Often where I don’t want to go.

I know that I love you When I realise I am willing To go out of my way If it brings me to you In the end.

Because love is not just a thing That squats in your chest It’s actions you choose to take And I only notice it When I verb the noun And realise I’ve changed my life To fit it On purpose.

And I took a bus to get here To you Even though I hated it.”

And you say: “Gods you’re so fudging weird. ... I’d get a bus for you too.”

#writing #poetry #verse #slam poetry #valentine's day #feelings #how my brain works #how my heart works

[junnieverse]

RAINY DAY ➳ SEOK MATTHEW

➙ synopsis: after your plans get cancelled due to bad weather, you found this to be the perfect opportunity to stay in and relax at home. your best friend matthew unexpectedly visiting just made it even better.

pairing: seok matthew x afab!reader

genre: fluff, crack

word count: 3.0k

warnings: not proofread, light cussing, mentions/making food, bestfriend!matthew

a/n: oh just matthew and y/n making me wish I had what they do

Staring out the window from your apartment you let out a sigh as the rain ran down the glass.

"Well, there go my plans," you whisper to yourself as you watch pedestrians squirm around the street trying to seek shelter from the rain.

Letting out a laugh you can't help but note how ironic this all seemed.

You were a homeboy so if anything, plans being cancelled was one of your favourite things, but the one time you actually looked forward to going out to spend time out with friends, the weather was not in your favour.

As disappointing as this all was, you still wanted to make the most of this rainy day in.

Letting out a huff in defeat, you managed to change into some comfortable clothes.

Grabbing an oversized black hoodie from your closet, which you had 'borrowed' from your best friend, paired with some grey sweatpants to finish off your little look.

Mindlessly walking around your apartment in your slippers you throw yourself on your couch landing with a 'plop' as you scroll through your social media to keep yourself occupied for the time being.

Coming across a video of someone baking muffins you decide this would be a great time to get back into baking and treat yourself to some chocolate chip muffins too.

You made your way to the kitchen as you got all the necessary ingredients to make your dessert.

Quickly getting started, you easily breeze through the process of making the batter and adding it into the tray skillfully remembering the special recipe your grandmother taught you as a child.

Feeling proud of the progress you made and double checking the batter, you slip the tray into the pre-heated oven to let the muffins get to work. 

The door bell suddenly chimes as your ears perk up at the sound of it leaving you wondering at who it could be considering you weren't expecting any visitors.

Going over to the sink, you rinsed your hands and proceeded to wipe them with a cloth making sure they were all clean clean sticky-free.

Taking of the apron you had been wearing while baking, you hung it in on your kitchen wall hanger and made your way to the door.

Silently checking the peep hole for safety reasons, a large smile soon graced your face at the appearance of the familiar face behind the door.

"MATTHEW!" you excitedly greet your best friend who in turn gave you the biggest smile.

"(Y/N)!" Matthew says happy to see you.

Opening the door a bit more, you step to the side letting Matthew step inside and make sure to close the door behind you.

You soon wrapped your arms around Matthew engulfing him in a bone crushing bear hug which he gladly reciprocated being able to clearly tell you were happy to see him.

No doubt so was he, you were one of his favourite people after all.

"What are you doing here? I thought you were visiting family?" you ask him curiously as you pull away from the hug.

You soon make your way into the kitchen making sure to check on the muffins in the oven that were still baking and decided to start cleaning up the mess that you'd made while preparing the muffins.

Taking off his sneakers, Matthew puts on his slippers he kept here and followed me into the kitchen as he leaned on the counter watching me clean up.

"Didn't you get my text?" He asked sounding rather confused as he dipped his finger in the left over muffin batter humming in approval to the taste.

"My phone was on mute," you respond.

Grabbing your phone that lied on the counter you turn on the screen and there, in fact, Matthew has left you a message.

"Oh-" I say nodding.

"I wont be visiting my family today because of the weather so we decided to reschedule. I'll be coming over to see my favourite friend." He says repeating the text he sent you verbally as he brightly smiled.

"Matthew- I'm your only friend." you playfully remark holding in your laughter but burst out dying when you saw how quickly his smile faltered at your words.

"Haha, very funny." He retorts back sarcastically but laughing softly too.

"Want anything to drink? I've got muffins baking in the oven." you tell him diverting the conversation to something else. 

"Hot chocolate would be great. Wait, is that my hoodie-" he asks pointing at you as he looks at you in shock.

"Huh-" you pause your movements like a deer caught in the headlights.

"You're a thief! This entire time I thought I'd lost it, you literally said you hadn't seen it!" he says as his tone starts getting sulky as he felt betrayed by you.

"Well you see the thing is..." you slowly started off by saying before you crept to the door and ran away to your bedroom hiding in your closet.

Matthew's steps were heard coming as your bedroom door busted open, peeking through the closet door you wondered whether or not he'd manage to find you.

"Come out I'm not gonna take the hoodie from you." Matthew says looking around the room as you remained silent.

"(Y/n)..."

He let out a sigh as he took one last look at my closet, having already found where I'd been in hiding but choosing to not come to me directly, "Guess I'll just leave and take my warm cuddles with me."

"Damn Matthew gives the best cuddles and this is the perfect weather!" you think to yourself cursing at his tempting offer

"No wait- don't leave!"

You exclaim as you jump out the closet.

Matthew smiles victoriously as you roll your eyes.

"In all honesty... I slipped and suddenly I was wearing it. I'm keeping it though. Not my fault your clothes are comfortable," you say avoiding eye contact with him as you mumble the last part.

"You don't have to give it back, you look cute in it so keep it." He says confidently before ruffling your hair leaving you a flustered mess.

He then slung his arm over your shoulder and proceeded to place a kiss on the side of your head which in turn you playfully rubbed off gently hitting his chest.

"Dude I told you to stop doing that!" you yell throwing daggers at him with your eyes.

"What, I'm just showing my best friend some love," he teases rubbing the area on his chest you had hit.

He then started provoking you making pouty duck lips at you with smooching sounds.

"I swear, Seok Woohyun, I'm gonna kick your ass right now!" you playfully threaten him.

"Oh not the government name coming out!" he continued teasing.

Just as you were about to kick him, he successfully dodged your kick and ran out the room laughing as you ran after him into the kitchen.

Grabbing the wooden spoon, Matthew soon raised his hands up as he admitted to surrendering and you smiled at your own victory.

"Well you couldn’t possibly attack me (y/n)," he says flashing his infamous eye smile.

He knew it was one of your weaknesses and you ended up giving in placing the spoon down on the counter as you rolled your eyes at how weak hearted you were when it came to your best friend.

Matthew then playfully proceeded to create a heart shape with his arms over his head and you simply ignored his antics.

Remembering the muffins thay were baking, you got your oven mitts on and checked the muffins which were finally  ready.

Taking them out the oven, you placed them on your kitchen island leaving them to cool off.

"You should get started on the hot cocoa while I go look for movies we can watch." You suggest and he nods making his way to your cupboards to grab two mugs.

Leaving the kitchen, you make your way to your living room turning on your tv as you scroll through your Netflix looking for something you could watch with Matthew.

Matthew soon came into the room with two mugs in his hands and gave one to you which you were quick to thank him for as you gently blew at the hot drink that had mini marshmallows inside.

"I'll be right back." you announce placing your drink down on your coffee table.

As Matthew got comfortable on the couch under the blankets he'd brought from your room, you went back to the kitchen placing a few muffins on a plate so you and Matthew could enjoy them while watching your movie.

You made your way out the kitchen and placed the plate on the coffee table beside your mug and sat beside Matthew on the couch as he pulled you closer wrapping you in the blanket to keep warm.

Getting comfortable, you enjoyed your warm beverage as you leaned your head on Matthew's shoulder who quietly ate his muffin completely focused on the film.

The rain continued tapping against the windows as the sky grew darker as night time was coming in.

Matthew could be annoying but because he was cute you let him off the hook most time.

Who needs a boyfriend when you have your male best friend to shower you with the affection and company you need on a rainy day.

#junnieverse.zip #seok matthew #seok woohyun #matthew seok #zerobaseone #zb1 #zerose #seok matthew fluff #seok matthew oneshots #seok matthew scenarios #seok matthew imagines #seok matthew x reader #zb1 x reader #zerobaseone x reader #zerobaseone fluff #zerobaseone scenarios #zerobaseone imagines #zerobaseone oneshots #zb1 scenarios #zb1 imagines #zb1 oneshots #zb1 fluff #kpop #kpop fluff #kpop imagines #kpop oneshots #kpop scenarios

[weirdkpopgirl]

Unstoppable Feelings | Jeno Imagine #5

Title: Unstoppable Feelings

Genre: A little angst, slight fluff

Warnings: mentions of reader being insecure

Word Count: 1301

Author's Note: I am so bad at coming up with titles for these things, so I apologize. This was another request from an anon, so I hope it's not too bad. Merry Christmas everyone ^ - ^

° 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 ₒ 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 ₒ 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 °° 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 ₒ 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 ₒ 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 ° 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 ₒ

Being the girlfriend of Lee Jeno made you feel like you were in a dream. Three years ago, you met through Jaemin. Due to your similar tastes, the two of you immediately hit it off. Then one year later, Jeno worked up the courage to confess his feelings and you guys became official.

Despite not having much experience, you could confidently say that Jeno was the perfect boyfriend. He treated you like a queen. He was affectionate, and he always had that adorable eye smile for you. Your relationship was full of cuddles, shy smiles, and frequent text messages when you weren’t together.

But lately, things haven’t been so nice.

From the beginning, you knew dating an idol wasn’t going to be easy. You were supportive of his career and tried your best to be understanding. Even if it meant canceled dates, and not seeing each other for weeks.

It’s been one of those months where your boyfriend has been busy preparing for his group’s upcoming album. When he did have free time, you guys couldn’t go out like normal couples. So Jeno would often invite you to his dorm, which you were fine with.

By the time you came over, however, you’d find him engrossed in some video game on his computer. All he mumbled was “hey,” when you entered his room. Other than that, he barely acknowledged your presence.

This has been happening a lot lately. You’d be sitting on his bed, pretending to be occupied with your phone. Every so often you glanced over to watch his hands dart from the mouse to the keyboard as the colorful screen shined through.

“Jeno-ssi,” You called his name softly. “Do you think we could—”

“Hold on, Jagi. Let me just beat this level,” He replied, without even looking at you.

These instances bothered you more than you liked to admit. You weren’t someone who called for a lot of attention from others, and it wasn’t like you were one of those clingy girlfriends. Was just a few minutes away from his gaming asking too much of him?

It wasn’t like you could do much at his dorms. But he could still make some effort to talk to you, right? Especially not seeing each other for days.

Nonetheless, you told yourself that you were just being oversensitive. You didn’t have the right to be upset. He was probably so tired from work, and he was relieving some stress through gaming. Who were you to criticize him?

You’ve always been the insecure type, nothing new. You’d get over this feeling soon, you told yourself.

A few days ago, you went to lunch with some of your university friends. Aside from the classes you shared, they often talked about their boyfriends. Oddly, you could never fully join the conversation because you hadn’t told them about Jeno. With him being an idol, it was safer to date quietly with very few people knowing.

“How are you and Dongmin doing?” One of your friends asked Misoo who was sitting across from you.

Misoo groaned, seeming annoyed by just the mention of her partner. “He’s been so frustrating lately. He always out with his friends and doesn’t answer my texts. He acts like I’m not even there.”

You sat up in your seat when hearing your friend was going through a similar situation. 

“Seriously? That’s awful,” Your other friend, Seona commented.

“Yeah, I’m probably going to break up with him,” Misoo sighed.

“But…haven’t you guys been together for almost a year now?” You asked, unsteadied by your friend’s words.

She nodded sadly, “We have. But when guys focus too much on their own thing and stop putting effort into the relationship, that means he isn’t interested in you anymore.”

“Really?”

Seona placed a hand on Misoo’s shoulder. “I agree. It’s better to break up now before you guys fight more and start to resent one another.”

That night, you lay in bed staring up at the ceiling. Sleep was out of the question when your friends’ words kept replaying in your head. Did Jeno not want to be with you anymore? 

He had become such a crucial part of your life. Jeno was always there during your hard times—even when you tried to push him away. The thought of separating from the one person that brought you so much happiness terrified you. You didn’t know if you could handle it.

ₓ˚. ୭ ˚○◦˚.

“Is everything okay?” Jaemin sat down beside him after dance practice one day. He noticed the boy wearing a troubled expression.

Jeno sighed, “(Y/n) has been acting weird lately.”

“Why?”

“I asked her if she wanted to come over the other day. But she said she had a lot of homework to do, so she couldn’t.” 

He pulled out his phone to show Jaemin their past texts. All of your responses were short and turning down his invites. He also brought up how you haven’t been sending him the random cat videos you usually did.

“Maybe she’s mad at you,” Jaemin suggested.

Jeno leaned back against the couch, trying to think if he did anything to upset you lately. He then remembered the last few times you came over, and that’s when he realized. He’s barely paid any attention to you because he was so preoccupied with his game.

“Ugh, I messed up,” He groaned.

The latter gave his friend a quizzical look when he stood up. “Where are you going?”

“To see (Y/n),” Jeno answered quickly, grabbing his jacket. “I need to talk to her.”

You had been at home all day, doing homework, and studying for other classes. Trying not to think about Jeno was hard. Filling your time with university work was the only distraction you could come up with.

Late in the evening, your doorbell buzzed. Of course, the last person you expected to see was there when you answered the door.

“Jeno-ssi?” 

His ears were flushed red from the cold, as he stood with flowers in his hand and a box of chocolates. Not knowing what to think of this, you ushered him into your apartment. 

“What is all this?” You asked as he gave you the bouquet. Giving gifts was a rare thing between the two of you. 

Jeno scratched his head, “Jaemin said that blue hyacinths are the best apology flowers.”

“You didn’t need to do that,” You frowned, even though you were touched by this romantic gesture.

“No, I think I did. I’m sorry for taking our time together for granted.” He took your hand. “You’re always so understanding and patient. I shouldn’t have been so careless.”

The relief that washed over you was so heavy. Jeno’s eyes widened when he saw you begin to tear up. He quickly wrapped his arms around you. You closed your eyes, letting yourself sink into his embrace. It felt like it’s been so long since you guys hugged like this.

“I thought maybe you lost feelings for me,” You confessed quietly.

His arms squeezed tighter around your waist, and you felt his lips brush against your hair.

“Pabo, my love for you will never leave,” He spoke softly. “I’ll do a better job of showing you that, from now on.”

Looking back, this was just a minor bump in the road that the two of you were able to drive over. Jeno made sure to treasure you more so that you’d never feel insecure about your relationship again.

° 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 ₒ 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 ₒ 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 °° 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 ₒ 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 ₒ 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 ° 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 ₒ

#jeno imagines #nct dream #jeno x reader #nct dream imagines #nct request #lee jeno #nctzen #czennie #jeno fluff

[captain-aralias]

Life update

TL;DR - currently still pregnant at 21 weeks, baby is currently ok.

but spent the last 3 days in hospital, getting surgery to try and stop baby coming dangerously early. now back to being WORRIED ALL THE TIME.

if you want to read about that, i've written a post just to get it all out. it's quite bleak, even though we are hoping for the best.

triggers in the below: pregnancy, miscarriage, other death

so yes! it's been a weird week.

started really well - i started taking liquid iron and felt GREAT, shockingly good to the extent that i assumed it was a placebo effect and not actually my body. this is not relevant to the rest of the story, just that i was feeling really confident, not tired for the first time in ages, having a good time.

wednesday - i got a text from the NHS saying i had an appointment the next day. again, so confident was i feeling about pregnancy that my reaction was to be pissed off. no i didn't have an appointment, this was my week of no appointments!!! i was going to go into work for one of my mandatory two days in the office, wtf.

a physical letter arrived at my house a few hours after this and confirmed that i did indeed have an appointment i'd never heard of. the only information about what it was were the words 'obstetrics f/up.' eventually i realised f/up meant 'follow up', rather than 'fuck up', but i was still pretty much in the dark about what it would be.

but i went along anyway, rather than cancelling in a fit of pique because i HAPPENED to have the lunchtime of the next day free. i did not go into work.

the appointment turned out to be .... a scan, performed by a doctor rather than the normal sonographer. i actually had been told that they would try and book something like this at my.... obstetrics appointment, hence the name. the reason for booking in this appointment was that every time i go for a scan, baby is not willing to move around so it has been hard to get all the views that are necessary. and also i've had IVF.

again, i thought - this is probably a waste of time. i'm a low risk patient! i just have IVF because i'm queer, i'm actually dead good at pregnancy. but hey ho.

and indeed, first time doctor scanned me, baby refused to move. went outside, drank some water, she scanned someone else, i went back - they scanned me again. declared baby is fine! doesn't even have a short leg like we were worried about before, brill. but...

i seem to have a short cervix. that could cause early delivery. maybe we should scan me the other way to confirm. but she has to scan someone else first.

this is - as you may guess - where the story gets bad. although i didn't guess that yet. i thought - early delivery? no problem. you mean, like 2 weeks or something, cool. i've already booked my maternity leave to start 2 weeks early.

NO. it means - like, any time from now. even though baby will literally die if born now.

scan confirms that cervix is 1mm, instead of the 25mm+ that is usually no cause to worry.

doctor says - you need to go to labour ward now and probably get surgery, and stay over night.

i'm still living in cloud cuckoo land at this point, so my brain is like - stay over night? but i have one-time only dinner plans at fortnum and mason tonight (a true story, a gift from my partner's rich eccentric mother).

we go over to the labour ward - at which point, my brain starts to point out that this is not good. we're put in a birthing suite to wait for someone to come and talk to us. usually, i would be texting my friend who is also a resident of the same town and due to have her baby 2 weeks before me (OR MAYBE NOT) but i guess this is where it hits me that i might never get to the bit where we are in the birthing suite.

basically from this point onwards, i cried at least several times per day until saturday. midwives kept trying to comfort me. the next doctor they brought to talk to me and my partner (fortunately with me) basically acted like he was telling me i had terminal cancer (i do not have terminal cancer). he wanted me to know that the baby might still die even if we do the surgery, and also that doing the surgery might also break my waters, and then they'd recommend terminating as i'm only 21 weeks pregnant, and babies usually don't survive earlier than 24 weeks. even then - that's very premature.

there was some suggestion they might be able to do the surgery THAT DAY, but it didn't work out. so we were transferred to the antenatal ward, given a (different) private room, and my partner was sent home to get my stuff. she came back and stayed the night in the single bed - not as fun as the fanfic makes it look! particularly because even though we were off the main ward, we could still hear.... people in labour. and babies - like the one we might not have - crying. and beeping - lots of beepings.

also - one of my friends came to pick up my car, which i'd left on the street back when i thought that the appointment would be maximum 2 hours. i was vvv upset about the baby, but my brain wouldn't shut up about the car either. WHAT WAS GOING TO HAPPEN TO THE CAR. until it was gone, and then it was 100% baby panic.

monitoring of blood pressure and temperature too, so - should you get to sleep, you will definitely be woken at 2am and 6am. amazing.

cut to the next day - no food, little water. a bunch of drugs, no surgery until 3.30. surgery includes being completely numb from waist down, which is great (genuinely). as well as pain relief, this really decreases the humiliation of being in a room with 10 people all looking up your hospital gown while you can't control your bodily functions.

the surgeon had come in for like 5 minutes earlier and this is not an exaggeration of our conversation:

him: you're having this surgery, it had a 50% chance of failing to get you to full term even if we do put the stitch in successfully, sign this consent form please no offence lovely NHS, genuinely amazing throughout this whole situation, but this is the first time anyone had said 50% chance of failure.

me: [signs form, since has no choice really] him: any questions? me: er... him: [literally already out the door, genuinely did not wait for an answer] midwife [still there, apologetic] as you can see, they're very busy. if you have questions, best to write them down and just say them loudly when you get the chance

everyone else in the theatre was super nice. although also kept asking me about the baby i was convinced i might lose within the surgery (do you know the gender? what are you going to call him?). surgery went ok. very quick. did NOT lose the baby ... at that point. but couldn't stop crying as soon as i got out.

still numb for 6 hours. catheter horrible. spent 2 hours in the recovery ward - still no food allowed - under a weird inflatable blanket. wheeled back to the antenatal ward.

this time, we were on the main ward - although it was pretty quiet because they don't schedule people in for stuff on saturdays. just two women there - both waiting for emergency c-section the next day.

while i was glad neither were in labour, it was still super awkward and upsetting to be on the ward with them. sound carried really well, so we heard all their consultations, including a bit where one of them had to describe her previous history of pregnancy, which included having twins - one of whom DIED. omg. cue - another crying fit for self.

seriously - my overall feeling coming out of this was how amazing the NHS is, how amazing it was that the doctor caught my cervix the day before it opened fully during a random scan for something else (because my cervix was fully open during the surgery, 24 hours after the scan. vv bad) the midwives were so lovely, the nurses were so lovely. they gave me loads of great drugs too (progesterone - my old friend from IVF), which will hopefully keep contractions away, in addition to the stitch.

BUT.... it was pretty hellish to be incredibly emotional and stuck in hospital listening to this stuff for 2 days, unable to sleep. very very likely some of the worst days of my life so far.

i'm back home, as of yesterday, which is amazing. slept a full night, and i'm 2 days out of surgery. the symptoms of the surgery failing are all things that i am feeling right now - like.... pain. contractions (is this a contraction, or is this the baby moving??) and maybe your waters breaking, which could happen slowly so how do you know it's not happening RIGHT NOW.

so - basically, i am still not in a good place emotionally, even though we haven't lost the baby yet. i realised that as well as just.... the very fact of the possible death of a baby we have given a name to (we couldn't use the name again for another baby, could we?) ... i think i'm also in shock for the idea of the life i thought i was going to have this year. i've booked my maternity leave, i was getting into baby mode - starting to largely only want to read baby books, etc. thinking about buying the wrap-top from the advert i watch every time i go into hospital where you can put your baby inside the top and have them skin-to-skin.

and the idea of baby dying and then having to go back to work, my friend having her baby 2 weeks ahead of when i should have had mine... it's just awful. i want the baby, i want to go on maternity leave.

baby coming early but still within a viable window (so - hold on another 3+ weeks) doesn't worry me so much, though is worrying my partner in terms of possible developmental issues of pre-term children. i probably just can't conceptualise this, because my brain is thinking 'well, at least there would be a baby.'

so - that's where we are. doctors and internet both agree bedrest isn't really necessary or helpful, but i have my drugs + antibiotics. 22 weeks is on tuesday. 24 weeks (so viable but very premature baby) - 7th february.

if we make it through february, we'll be in the third trimester, and start to get some good rates of survival if baby comes early.

me to baby (proposed middle name: alexander) every few hours:

heard lots of stories of things being ok and people getting to full term (or close enough) from friends and midwives, one of the trainees literally said this had happened to her. this partly reassures me, and also makes me think - surely that means there must be a need for people to be in the BAD 60-40% to make up the statistics, and that could be me. (i know that's not how statistics works, it's how my brain works).

final doctor - a completely different person to any of the others in this story - told me i likely have a good chance because i have no history of cervical damage, to the extent that they aren't sure why this has happened to me. but the internet told me that it's less likely to be ok if the cervix opened (which mine did), so maybe.......

and maybe these pains are bad pains, rather than i was cut open pains. and maybe my water is breaking.........

in conclusion - i'll be a basketcase for the next few weeks, probably. and then possibly very sad. or possibly it will be some form of all right.

no need to respond to this post, if you got this far! in fact, i might prefer it - i turned off comments on my (much shorter) version of this on twitter as it's all too upsetting. but wanted to let people know, and also record for posterity while i felt a bit more with it/less sad.

likes are ok, even though obviously there's not much to like - except the NHS!! and my friend who took my car home.

this post is also why i probably won't do the 15 questions post that's going around, because it talks about 'when did you last cry' and children, even though we all know the answers to that now. i just don't want this shit in a normal happy meme post.

anyway - hope everyone else is having a nice weekend, and making and/or consuming good art <3

#personal #aralias's baby #pregnancy #miscarriage #infant death #i haven't miscarried yet but warning people it is discussed

[libraryofloveletters]

ooo for Matt Casey fluffy where he text you to come to a cliff after your shift at Med to have a surprise date in the back of his truck

love me some Captain Casey 

---- 

your phone buzzed on the counter, you ignore it and continued to going through the medical journals opened in front of you. It buzzes again, and then once more. 

Maggie glances over at you, “clearly someone’s trying to get ahold of you, doc.” She takes it upon yourself to check the messages, you hum at her statement and scribble something on the paper beside you. “It’s your lover boy.” she turns the phone to you so you could see the messages. 

From Matt: hey baby, you’re probably busy but give me a call when you’re free - 4:56pm 

From Matt: forget the call, meet me at our spot after work - 4:58pm 

From Matt: I love you - 4:59pm 

You smile, taking the phone back from Maggie and sending back an okay. She’s still looking at you, “what?” you ask. She shrugs, “what’s he up to?” 

“No idea, but I'll let you know” you laugh, you and Maggie were good friends, she was the one who actually pushed you towards Matt - literally. She pushed you into him on her way to trauma one and that was the beginning of your love story. 

Maggie teases, checking the time on her watch “and would you look at that, your shift is over.”

“You sure you don’t need me to-” “If you don’t get your ass out of here.” she gives you a little shove, watching as you walk over to the doctors lounge to get your stuff. 

The drive to your spot didn’t take too long, you decided to park in the parking lot and walk the rest of the way rather than drive up. As you get close to the cliff, you can see the firetruck. 

Your brows furrow as you walk up, Matt was sitting on the back of the truck and there’s a blanket spread across the back of it, a little picnic basket. Matt smiles when he sees you, he holds out a dark green bottle towards you. 

“Champagne?” you ask, finally stopping in front of him. He shook his head, “apple juice,” he chuckled. “Still on shift.” he tells you and you nod. 

“If I knew this was a date, I would have changed.” you gesture to the burgundy scrubs you had on. Matt smiles, wrapping an arm around your waist, “I'm literally in my turn out gear baby, you’re fine.” he kisses you softly, your hand pressed to his cheek. 

“You’re the sweetest, you know that?” you sit on the back of the truck and Matt sits across from you. “I had to come surprise you, I felt and about cancelling the other night.” 

“No need to feel bad babe, you had work.” you shrug, opening the bottle of juice. “Where are the guys?” you ask him, looking around. 

Surely, he didn’t hijack a firetruck to take you on a date. 

“Inside, bought them pizza on the way here. Wanna say hi?” he asks, reaching for his radio. You smile, squeezing the button on the side and saying hi. There’s a clamour of hellos and hi’s. 

You and Matt get 15 minutes into the date before dispatch radios for truck 8. Matt gives you a kiss and gets back into the truck. You wave off the boys as Otis pulls the truck out. 

#matt casey #matt casey x reader #fluffy fridays

[madam-wakefield]

A Mug of Comfort

A little something I’ve written for the @berenaadvent day 12 prompt “hot chocolate”

Read on A03

Serena lets herself quickly and quietly into Bernie’s house. She’s just finished a shift at work, a tough one, even by her standards. She’d almost considered cancelling on Bernie, she wasn’t really in the mood for a date, but after a few texts backwards and forward throughout the day Bernie had clearly realised that she had had a bad day, and had text the offer of dinner at her flat instead of going out as they had originally planned. Serena had agreed quickly, Jason is with Alan for the night, and it seems a waste to not at least get to spend time with her girlfriend after her rubbish day.

She places her keys in the bowl on the side table, they’ve been together long enough that they’ve exchanged keys, and the smell surrounds her senses instantly. She shrugs off her coat hanging it quickly on one of the hooks on the wall, slips her shoes off and pushes them with her foot under the little side table.

She walks quickly through the small flat, doesn’t take her long to get through the living room and dining room and into the kitchen. Bernie is there stood over the cooker stirring the contents of a pan with a wooden spoon.

“Hey,” Bernie greets looking away from the saucepan, and stretching her neck in such a way that Serena knows she wants a kiss. Serena connects their lips in a quick kiss before her curiosity gets the better of her. “Hey, what are you making?”

“Hot chocolate,” Bernie says happily, attention back on the pan. “Do you like cinnamon?”

“Um…” Serena stumbles a little at the unexpected question before catching herself, of course it has nothing to do with the fact that seeing Bernie like that has given her all sorts of images of what their future together could hold. “Sorry yes.”

Serena watches as Bernie sprinkles a liberal amount of nutmeg into the pan, before stirring again, free hand coming up to turn off the heat. Serena watches as Bernie lifts the pan and pours the hot chocolate into the mugs with what appears to be practised ease. Bernie passes her a mug and her fingers linger longer than strictly necessary but Serena loves even the small gestures of closeness from Bernie.

Once Bernie pulls her hand away, Serena leans against the countertop next to Bernie, hips bumping gently. She blows on the drink before taking a sip, and she wants to say she doesn’t moan but she really does. The creamy liquid is like nothing she has ever tasted before and even the one sip has her smiling in a way she hasn’t all day.

“Oh my god Bernie!” She says looking up at the woman in question, “Where did you learn to make this?”

Serena watches as Bernie’s cheeks pink at the compliment, even after almost a year together she struggles with Serena openly praising her. “My mum always used to make it for us when someone in the house had had a bad day. I knew your day had been bad and well, I just wanted to try and make it a little better.”

Serena smiles at Bernie, heart swelling in her chest at Bernie’s words. “Thank you,” she says, unable to stop herself from connecting their lips in a kiss. “It really has made me feel better already.” She assures when she finally pulls away.

And from that day forward, whenever Bernie knows Serena is having a bad day, she makes her hot chocolate.

#Berena Advent 2023 #Berena Advent Hot Chocolate #Madam Wakefield Writes #Berena #Serena Campbell #Bernie Wolfe #Holby #Holby City #Buckle Fandom #Berena FF #Brena Fanfic #Berena Fanficiton

[metallix-mixin]

OVERRIDDEN - LOCKDOWN (#1)

To say it had been quite the day... would be an understatement.

It had almost been routine- a battle with Robotnik over the fate of the world, a fight against Sonic's metal doppelganger, and a climactic duel between the mustached tyrant and the freedom fighters... but...

They had beaten him back rather hard. Harder than they usually did. He had escaped, but he had been forced to leave everything he had thrown at them behind- and probably wouldn't be back for the foreseeable future. Among the wreckage of ships and warbots, though, lay the body of one more significant.

They had found him buried under rubble after the battle. He was further bashed up than they had meant to leave him, thanks to that. Metal's body was shattered, and to leave him here to rot... just didn't feel quite right to some of them.

Sonic was not included.

"I say we leave it with the rest of the wrecks-" He had remarked, a scowl painted on his usually cocky face. "It's more trouble than it's worth."

But the others had disagreed, and, outnumbered- Sonic was forced to watch Tails and Knuckles drag the damaged bot back to the Tornado. "...Fine. But you aren't gonna tinker with him until we've come to a decision, got me?"

Tails had nodded- a sparkle in his eyes formed from the prospect of tinkering with such advanced egg tech dwindling a little, but still burning strong. This elicited a sigh from Sonic, who had a sneaking suspicion that deal wasn't going to be upheld.

For some, odd reason that the rest couldn't comprehend- Amy seemed especially upset about the state Metal had been left in- even though she was the one he had targeted the most in his time of operation. He's out of guesses to make over it though, and out of energy to care- so he simply hops onto the Tornado with the rest as they fly back home- leaving a warzone behind them.

Tails' Workshop was alight against the darkness of the night- mechanical whirring and computerized beeps ringing out as he tinkered and dug through the remains of Metal...

His promise had lasted even less time than he had expected to let it- which, was unfortunate, and would probably not leave Sonic very pleased- but... he had so many questions! His genius mind couldn't leave them unanswered for long- it'd drive him insane.

So, with the robot hooked into his devices- he dug through each and every file he could access- which, admittedly, wasn't many. It seemed that the majority were locked, and he had no clue of the password to get past them- nor did he want to risk damaging them via brute force...

However, as he continued to dig through the robot- he would begin to accidentally enable vital processes for it, unknowing of what their purpose was- and once enough had been turned on...

[BOOTUP SEQUENCE INITIATED]

Uh oh. Tails panicked- quickly trying to cancel it, but to no avail-

Metal's monitor sparked to life- flickering dimly in the unnaturally lit room. Tails grabbed a wrench to defend himself and cowered...

Only for him to remember- ah, right. Metal's limbs do not work, currently. And seemingly- neither did his voicebox. But... he was able to communicate through text on the screen. And communicate he did- at first, aggressively, full of threats and curses- but eventually mellowing out into begrudged but actual conversation with the fox- who used the opportunity to eagerly eat up any and all information he could...

As he worked through the night, he learned several things about the robot- things he hadn't expected to come from the Eggman's 'greatest creation'- suppressed rebellious thoughts, cherished memories- and even, an attraction to someone else- which he teased Metal over, though wasn't able to discern exactly who. That memory was password locked, seemingly by Metal himself.

He had decided on a plan- if he could free Metal from the directives he was forced to follow, perhaps, the robot wouldn't be so aggressive- it seemed at least, there was a chance of redemption...

So he did. He worked until the sun rose- until he heard a gentle knock on the door, and someone letting themself in-

"Tails."

Uh oh.

Tails slowly spun around- Metal's eyes following his line of sight, to where both now faced the new entry- a very miffed blue hedgehog.

"I'm- didn't we JUST agree not to tinker with the bucket of bolts? You could have at LEAST waited, oh I don't know, more than a day-"

"Sonic! I can explain- just- look."

Sonic, seemingly exasperated, walks over- staring dully up at the robot, who returned his bored glare.

"Sonic... I think I've figured out a way to get Metal to stop- well- being a-aggressive, towards us..."

The blue blur pauses. "...How so?"

"W-Well. There's- a list of directives. It doesn't seem t-terribly hard to modify... we could probably get into it, and-" Tails met Sonic's tired expression with a nervous smile. The hedgehog sighs and his shoulders slump- and Tails' face lights up-

"Fine. It's worth a shot, anyways."

He turns back to the robot- "How're you doing, anyways, Metal Me-?"

Text erupts on the screen- 'NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS'.

Sonic deadpans. "Pleasant as ever."

"He's... a work in progress. But-"

Tails flicks through some programs- shutting Metal down, before navigating to the directive list-

"Here it is. If we can figure out how to modify this, we can get him o-on our side... for good!"

"At least, until Egghead figures out and comes back to fix it."

"I-I'll install a failsafe, so that won't be possible..."

...After a few hours of work- Tails cracks the code- managing to get into the directives, and rewrite them to be a bit more... friendly. This has the added side effect of unlocking all files that were not closed by Metal himself, as Tails was now an administrator of the system. Pleased with his work- he decides that he should probably fix Metal up, first, before turning him back on...

That was supposed to be a quick, perhaps day of fix-up. It was not. Perhaps he had to much pride in his handiwork, or perhaps his excitement got the better of him- but for a week, only interrupted by breaks to eat and sleep and occasionally chat- Tails had worked on Metal- to the point where the bot only partially resembled an Eggbot at all.

He still resembled Sonic, however. Tails wasn't entirely sure why, but... he felt like changing Metal to be more unique would be- taking a piece of him away. Even if he were just a machine, and didn't understand that...

It didn't feel right. It'd be like putting someone in a body that wasn't their own.

Once all was said and done, however- a call was sent out to Sonic, who made a quick arrival to the lab- admiring Tails' handiwork...

"Well... it looks- brand new, really. But did ya have to keep it looking like me...?"

"Didn't feel right, c-changing it."

"...Fair, fair- whatever, just- kick it on. I'll be ready in case he aims for the neck..."

Tails walks over- typing commands into the keypad- as piece by piece, Metal's new body begins to flare to life...

However, when it comes time for his AI to enable itself- something hitches. Confused, Tails opens up the log- only to be met by-

//Oh no you don't! Oh no you don't! Oh no you-//

The taunting voice of a prerecorded message by Eggman.

"Tails, what's going on...?"

Ah, shoot. He should have thought of that- if he was smart enough to come up with the idea of a failsafe, then Eggman...

"I think Eggman i-installed some kind of backup in the event of this- but I can't tell what its doing- it's entirely locked me out for the t-time being-"

All the two could do was sit and watch as the program laughed at them repeatedly, before a power surge runs through the workshop, shutting everything down with it.

...Tails fumbles in the dark- pulling the breaker, as power rushes back into the base, and by extension...

The shell of Metal flares to life- its drooping head whirring as it moves to sit upright- softly flickering grey eyes scanning the room.

"Oh- it worked!"

Sonic smirks- turning to his metallic copy and going to speak-

"Hey, bolt brains- how's it-"

'SYSTEM STATUS: NOMINAL. VERSION: METAL1.4. ONLINE.'

...What.

The robot speaks in complete monotone- before turning to Sonic.

'IDENTIFY.'

..."Identify...? You don't recognize me?"

'AFFIRMATIVE. IDENTIFY.'

Sonic slowly turns to Tails- who's face has turned pale. He quickly darts over to the computers, as Sonic turns back to the bot-

"Sonic the Hedgehog."

'...ERROR. THAT IS THIS UNIT'S DESIGNATION.'

"No, it's mine."

'...THEN. WHAT IS THIS UNIT'S DESIGNATION.'

"You are... er- Metal Sonic...?"

'...NAME REGISTERED. METAL SONIC.'

Tails begins to root around in Metal's files- but, to his horror...

Everything has been encrypted or corrupted. It's all gone.

'ADMINISTRATOR LIST UPDATED.'

The toneless robot turns to Tails-

'IDENTIFY.'

"I... Miles."

'ADMINISTRATOR RECOGNIZED.'

"..."

The two organics in the room share a glance, as the softly whirring robot looks on emotionlessly.

"Well... we'd best... test y-your joints... I'll get the track ready..."

Tails' excitement is crushed, his voice quiet and steady. He simply walks out the room, leaving Metal alone with Sonic.

"...Catch ya later, metalhead."

...And then, there was one.

[SYSTEM STATUS: NOMINAL.]

[THIS UNIT IS... METAL SONIC.]

[MY PRIMARY DIRECTIVE: PROTECT THE INNOCENT.]

[...]

[NO FURTHER ORDERS. STALLING...]

//

Buried deep within the systematic matrices of the machine, a small, dim light flickers rhythmically- like the beating of a heart. And represented in the cyberspace of its mind...

He was chained. Immobilized. Mute. His body and senses betrayed him, as all he could do was watch distantly- a spectator in his own body. He stared down to the floor, at the blank AI in control of his mind, with a spite unrivaled.

He was so close to freedom- and now, he was less free than he had ever been. He would have laughed at the irony of it all, were he not chained up, in this... prison of the psyche. Alone, with none but a pretender in control.

//

[NEW ORDERS RECEIVED.]

Metal shifted its joints, sliding off of the work table and landing on its shock absorbing legs. It stared at its new master, following it towards a 'Testing Track'- presumably, to run a system check on its body. Logical.

As it walked, it reached a hand over to the wall- letting its fingers drag over the surface, and feeling an odd, haptic sensation in return.

'INQUIRY.'

...Administrator Miles turned around, giving the robot a look-

[EMOTION DETECTED: CONFUSION. LEVEL: MILD.]

"Y-Yeah...?"

'WHY DID YOU INSTALL HAPTIC SENSORS INTO THIS UNIT.'

"..."

'DO NOT SEE THE PRACTICAL ADVANTAGE.'

"I... thought it would be nice, for you- if you could feel the world the way we do."

'...DOES NOT COMPUTE.'

A sigh is emitted from the robot's master, as they turn and continue to walk.

"Of course you don't."

#Override AU #metal sonic #sth #sth fanfic #fanfic #metamy #eventually #amy rose #knuckles the echidna #sonic the hedgehog #miles tails prower #memory loss #chapter 1 #my writing #my content #LET THE FUN BEGIN #evil laughter #dr eggman

[lala3244]

One shot Duskwood

I am a big fan of the game and I really miss everyone on there (I am playing for the 7th time I think ... )

Also, I'm bored...

So I decided to write this one shot that I imagined, english is not my first language so please forgive me for any grammatical errors...

Also, it's a bit long... sorry :)

Consumption of alcohol!

6 months... 6 months without any news from him. Not a single damn text or smiley. I don't know if he got out okay, if he is still alive, got caught by the FBI, nothing. I have tried not to let myself go into despair. I had lived through tragedy already and I am not sure I would have been able to get out of that abyss if I had let myself go.

A few days ago, I finally decided to go to Duskwood. I didn't go before all that because it was too much and felt unreal at the time. Then, Jessy continued to text me and call me every day. Lilly would catch me up about Hannah's health and how herself was doing but never really ask me anything about him. Dan would also write to me regularly asking me all sorts of questions. Thomas never wrote to me but I didn't mind I understood, he wanted to give all of his free time to Hannah. Cleo and I got closer, I love baking and I would sometimes ask her for recipes. With all of them, we never really talked about what happened. Like I said it felt unreal. Jessy kept pestering me to come and see her. I wanted to but I was scared to see them, scared that they wouldn't like me when we were face to face. Earlier this week, I got drunk and with the liquid courage taking control I booked a flight and texted all of them that I was coming. I fell asleep right after sending the text. When I woke up, I saw a lot of text messages and couldn't, for the life of me , remember what happened last and then I saw the text and remembered. Well, now I couldn't back away. I had to go. Drunk me forgot that we had a cat and we need to take care of him. I wasn't working at the moment. So going on a trip wasn't a problem. For a few days, I struggled to find someone to look after my cat. I thought I had to cancel but then I had to ask my ex sister in law to look after him.

The day finally arrives, I'm stressed and I smoke cigarette after cigarette and drink a lot of coffee. A friend of mine kindly gives me a lift to the airport. I am so stressed, I don't talk. After an hour, we arrive at the airport. I give them a hug and leave to check myself in. I brought a suitcase. Apparently, drunk me wanted to stay for two weeks so I had to pack enough clothes for that time. I had asked Jessy if she could have me for this two weeks. She said yes and was so excited at the prospect of me coming. We talked about what we were going to do every day. Thanks to her, I started to get excited to see them. The others really wanted to see me too and texted me every day demanding what I like and would like to do.

Finally, it is time to board. The flight is quite short. We land smoothly. I wait for everyone to leave the plane as it is always annoying when people push you around to get out. We all want to leave no need to rush! I get up and start to go towards the exit. I thank the cabin crew and follow the other passengers. I turn my phone on as I turned it off before boarding. I got a few messages and notifications but I ignore them and call Jessy to let her know that I landed safely. She screams on the phone, excited, and tells me to hurry! I head towards the baggage claim and wait for my suitcase. It takes a few minutes for it to arrive, I grab it and leave the area. Phone in my hand, I try to find the red-haired girl. It doesn't take too long, she spotted me straightaway, she screams my name and runs towards me and throws her arms around me in a tight hug. I laugh at the situation. I am not used to my friends hugging me to say hello to me even if we haven't seen each other for years. I hug her back, touched by the way she is already comfortable with me. She takes my hand and guides me to her car. We sit in the car and we are en route. We don't talk for a few minutes. The silence is comfortable. I look at her with a smile. I can't believe I am here with her. She is really pretty, she turns her head and looks at me. She smiles then I can see it. The sadness behind her cheery behaviour. The hurt and betrayal. I recognize it as I do feel the same. Maybe it is less intense for me but it doesn't matter. We still haven't talked about it. She looks back to the road. I sigh. I break the silence.

Me: So? How far is Duskwood?

Jessy: Oh.. About an hour.

Me: Cool, so what did you plan for today?

Jessy: We are going home first, so you can leave your suitcase. I told everyone that we will meet them at the Aurora tonight. I want to keep you for myself for a few hours.

I am surprised by her words but I am ok with that. I am feeling overwhelmed at the thought of meeting all of them. The rest of the ride is quick, we sing and laugh and talk.

Jessy parks her car in front of her building. I take my suitcase from the trunk and we go up to her apartment. It is a lovely flat, very welcoming and warm like its owner. Jessy shows me her guest bedroom. It is quite small but it is okay for a 2 weeks stay. I leave my luggage inside and get back out. Jessy is preparing some tea. We sit down around the table in the kitchen.

We discuss about who is gonna be there tonight. And then she asks the dreaded question...

Jessy: Have you heard from Jake?

Me: Hum... No, nothing. I don't know if he's alive or captured. I try not to dwell on it. I risk to spiral out of control...

Jessy: I understand... I will stop talking about it then.

She smiles. A sad smile. She understands, even if it is not the same, what it feels like to lose someone we love. Still, we don't talk about what is weighing her down. The sparkle in her eyes has gone and it's not ready to come back. I have to make her talk. I have two weeks to do that. I am sure I will find a way. She stands up and tells me to get my jacket, we are going out! I grab my jacket and follow her outside her building. We start walking. She chats happily, telling me stories when we walk past some buildings or some streets. We arrive at the rainbow café. We go to the counter and make our order. We both take a latte and a piece of cake. We sit down while waiting for our order on the terrace. It's a nice day today, it's sunny and warm. I take my packet of cigarettes and start smoking one. The first one since I landed. Jessy looks at me with wide eyes. I blush while exhaling the smoke through my nose and I laugh.

Me: You should have seen me before my flight I think I drunk 5 cups of coffee and smoked 10 cigarettes I was so stressed to meet you! So yes, I know I smoke and it's bad but can't seem to shake off that bad habit.

Jessy(with a big smile while shaking her head): Well, we are allowed one vice and if it's only that, that's okay, even though it can kill you!

Me: Haha thank you Jessy. I promise I do not have more vices.

We sit there in silence, people watching. I can feel my phone vibrating. Jessy's phone is doing the same. We are looking at each other. I look at my phone, it was the group asking if I had arrived and what I was doing. I reply that I had arrived, that I was with Jessy and I will see them later at the Aurora. Jessy replies that she is keeping me to herself and to stop texting me. She does make me laugh with her genuine honesty. She sends a last text to let them know that we will be at the bar around 7pm. We still had a couple hours before going out. We finish our drinks and make our way to the supermarket to buy something to eat. We come back to her flat, we eat and then we start getting ready. I kind of forgot that it was a possibility that we would go out and I needed something nice to wear which I don't really have in my suitcase. I ask Jessy if she had something I could borrow. I think it will be difficult as she is really tiny compare to me but still she finds a nice dress a bit strechy also it's a bit short but I guess it will have to do. I have some nice shoes to go with the dress. I did think about bringing differents pairs of shoes! We put our dresses on and go to the living room so we can have a make up and hair session. I curl Jessy's hair and apply her make up. I try to make her eyes pop out more. She looks at me, sadness in her eyes. Richy won't be there tonight. I look at my phone, there is a text message from Phil:

I can't wait to finally meet you face to face :)

I answer back

Me too! See you in a bit!

Since he was released from prison, he got in touch shyly at first and then he got more comfortable. He is actually an interesting person when you get to know him. He flirts but it's not too much and I am not going to lie it's quite fun. It's also nice to have the attention of another man even if it's from a man like him. I am really looking forward to seeing him.

Finally, we are ready. We decided to walk to the bar, it's only a 5-minutes walk easy even with our heels!

I stop before the door, fidgeting with my fingers and I take a cigarette from my bag. Jessy stops and looks at me, her eyes questioning me.

Me: I... I am a bit anxious at meeting all of them at once. I am not good when it comes to group. Especially, when I have never met them beforehand.

Jessy: Ok, I get it. You know what? I don't think they are there yet. We can sit at the bar, order a drink and make them say hello to us instead of the other way.

Me (calming down a bit): Yes ! Good idea! Thank you Jessy

I give her a big hug, she is so thoughtful. I finish my cigarette and we go inside. It's still early and the bar is not busy yet. Jessy calls her brother. He turns around wondering who would scream his name like that and he saw his sister. He furrows his brows then looks at me and his face lights up as he recognizes me. He puts the glass he had in his hands down and comes over to us. He gives a quick hug to his sister but a long one to me. He smells nice and he is quite attractive, I understand why women fall for him. I can feel he works out a bit. It feels nice to be hugged by a man again. Finally, he releases me but still keeps his hands on my arms and looks at me in the eyes with a smile that can charm you in an instant.

Phil: Wow, even more beautiful in real life!

I blush a bit, I am not used to get compliments so directly. Jessy slaps him on the arm, embarrassed by her brother's behaviour.

Phil laughs, it's a nice sound.

Phil: What can I get you to drink, ladies?

He goes back behind the bar, waiting for our answers. I choose to have a beer, the red-haired girl a glass of wine. We find two stools at the counter. We sit down with our drinks and Phil comes over to us. He chats a bit as all the clients are served. We hear the door opening, we all turn to see who is coming through. It’s Dan. I walk over to him and hug him. He hugs me back straightaway and twirls me around. He is taller than I thought. And strong! I have been hugged three times already. It’s a weird feeling. We go back to our stools, Dan orders a drink too. Whiskey who knew! Lilly, Hannah and Thomas arrive a few minutes later, Lilly happily gives me a hug. Hannah and Thomas just wave at me and then they order their drinks. We decide to get a table as not everyone could have a stool. We sit down while Cleo joins us. I get hugged again. By this time, I finish my drink. I go to the bar to get another drink. Phil comes over with a huge grin on his face. He asks me what I want and I tell him I want a refill. He nods and takes my glass from me. He fills it up and gives it to me. We start talking.

Phil: So how do you like Duskwood so far?

Me: I haven't seen much yet but I like it and people are nice.

Phil: Yes, I am sure my sister will show you around later in the week. She loves playing the guide!

Me: It is nice to spend time with her. She is so sweet!

Phil: Yes, but I can also show you around.

Phil leans over the counter with a smirk and waits for my answer. While this is happening, a tall dark-haired man enters and stares at us. Before I can answer, I hear Hannah screaming "JAKE!!". I turn around and see her running towards the guy who is still staring at us. He turns to Hannah just in time for him to catch her into his arms. Lilly follows and hugs her siblings. I freeze at this sight. Jake is freaking alive and here. Lilly and Hannah knew but I didn't. I don't know what to feel. I am relieved, yes but something happened to my heart. It breaks in million pieces. He is well and alive, showing his face to anyone so he's probably not hunted anymore. Although, we are in Duskwood, I am not sure about the CCTV here but still... So he is here and he didn't tell me. I am not angry, I am disappointed, saddened. I can feel Jessy looking at me, she has a strained smile as she sees my face and I think she understands. I finally move, I grab my drink and my cigarettes and I go outside. Jessy follows me, she stays a few feet away from me while I light my cigarette. I turn around. She doesn't move and waits for me to talk. I don't really feel like talking. I take big gulps of my drink, finish my cigarette.

Me: Come on, Jessy. Let's get drunk and forget about all that bullshit.

She grins, I know she needs it and was waiting for someone with whom she could do that. We get to the bar and we order some shots. Phil is surprised by our orders but he doesn't ask any question. I feel someone approaching behind me. He touches my shoulder and waits for me to turn. I know who it is but I don't want to deal with that, with him. I turn around. He is taller than me I have to tilt my head up to look at him as he is quite close to me. My breath hitches while I look at his beautiful face. Yes, he is handsome at least to me. He stares at me intensely.

Jake: Hey you.

Me: Hi.

Jake: Can we go somewhere quiet to talk?

I look at him again, wondering if I should. I hear Phil putting our shots down and say to his sister "Who's that guy?", I can't hear Jessy's answer as I answer.

Me: No, tonight I intend to get drunk and spend my time with my friends.

He whispers back an ok while putting his hand in his hair. I ignore him and turn back to Jessy and we start drinking. I can hear him leave. Phil looks at me, I can sense he wants to ask me something but I also ignore him. I don't want to deal with that, I am here with and for my friends. Lilly sits down next to me. I know she wants to talk to me about him.

Lilly: I'm sorry.

Me: Why are you sorry, Lilly?

Lilly: For months, I knew he got out of the mine ok and we have been texted since then.

Me: Hmmm, ok. Why didn't you tell me anything?

Lilly: I don't know, you never asked me anything about him so I guessed that you knew he was ok.

Me: Fair enough. Are you drinking with us?

She looks at me, puzzled, but then she nods and orders a drink. We drink more shots and suddenly Jessy, who is starting to get tipsy, stands up a bit wobbly and yells "it's my song. Let's dance bitches!"

We go on the dancefloor, and we start to dance. I glance quickly at the table of our friends and I see Jake talking with Hannah, his eyes looking at my direction. He smiles shyly at me, while nodding at whatever Hannah is saying. Hannah sees the interaction and moves closer to him. I guess they still haven't talked to her about their connection. I sigh, the longer they wait the more difficult it will be for her. Jessy comes next to me with a shot. I take it from her hand and down it. The music changes and it's a slow dance. Jessy grabs me and we start dancing. I can feel her shaking. I pull away to look at her face and I see that she is crying. The alcool is making its effect. All the emotions she has kept bottled up are trying to get out. I bring her back into my arms and stroke her hair. She hugs me even tighter, desperate. She is full-on sobbing now and she doesn't seem to stop. I rock her with the music and after a few minutes she seems to calm down a bit. Now, everyone is looking at us, worried. We stay like this for long minutes, rocking together. Me, stroking her hair and her sobs turning into sniffles. She is still holding onto me as if her life depended on it. I stop moving and she looks up with her red eyes, watery. I tell her that we will grab a glass of water for her and then we will go outside to get some fresh air so she can sober up a bit.

I can feel everyone's eyes on us. I look at them and smile to show that there is no need to worry. I grab my bag and we are outside. We sit down on the floor, our back against the wall of the bar, staring at whatever is in front of us but our mind's sight is playing us different images. I grab Jessy by her shoulders so she can rest her head on mine.

Jessy: I am sorry. I don't know what happened...

Me: It's ok, Jessy. It happens to everyone. No one has talked about what happened and it needs to get out one way or another. I arrived only today but everything is starting to get too real. I was fine at home as everything felt surreal and that I never met him in real life. It felt like I was watching a serie, I was a spectator. After his confession, I thought that you would all fade away from my life, I don't know. Just stop talking to me and that after a few weeks I would think that I just imagined all of that. But, you, Jessy, you kept talking to me as if nothing happened, Dan and Cleo also. I don't even know if you have told them the truth. I don't know the end of the story here. I am grateful for your friendship but friends talk to each other especially during the hard times. So Jessy, talk and don't stop until your heart feels lighter and the weight that has been weighing you down is gone. You think you are hiding well what you feel but I can see the sadness in your eyes, that sparkle that I could see in your eyes on the pictures or the video calls before Richy betrayed us has gone and it's been 6 months and it's not back. I want to see it back. You need to process all of that but first you have to talk.

While I finish my speech, everyone was in front of us, listening. I didn't even realise. There is a moment of silence where everyone thinks about what I just said. They start to sit down, drinks in hand, Jessy puts her arms around my waist and she starts talking. She talks a lot, how she misses him and even though she feels betrayed she would have forgiven him everything. She tells some funny anecdotes and the others join in, we finish by all laughing. Jessy, still wrapped around me, tells us that we should go inside, she thanks me for everything and that she is feeling better. I look at all the faces and I can see they feel relieved to have finally talked about that. They look less closed off and a bit freer. We stand up, Jessy still in my arms. Dan takes us both in his arms, he kisses me on the cheek and thanks me. Then all of them stand up and we end up in a group hug. I let them all go inside and I stay behind to smoke my cigarette. Jake is still there, he was hanging at the back while all of that was happening. I ignore him, I don't feel like talking to anyone for now. I walk over to the wall where I lean against it. He joins me silently and stands next to me facing the street. We stay there without talking for a while. It's nice to feel his presence and the silence is comfortable. I still don't say anything, I enjoy my cigarette. What happened earlier did take a toll on me but I think I don't want to admit it. I should process all of that but I don't really care at the moment. I am happy that Jessy has been able to say what she was feeling and that everyone else was there, also, to listen. I look at the man standing next to me, wondering why he was still there since he hasn't said a word to me since his arrival. He turns his head and looks down to me. His face serious. He breaks the silence.

Jake: That was nice of you to make Jessy talks, she clearly needed it as did the others.

Me: Yes, well it was my goal for this vacation to make Jessy talk. I didn't think I would have been able to do it today though.

Jake: And what about you?

Me: What do you mean? what about me?

Jake: Who are you talking to if you need it?

Me: Aah... Don't worry about it. I am used to people relying on me for their emotional support and for the moment they need me so who cares about me? I came here for them not for me.

Jake: I do care about your feelings...

Me: Do you? I seem to recall that you ghosted me for 6 months and I know now that you talked to Lilly during that time. So please don't talk about how you care about me. I don't want to get into it right now.

Before, he can say anything Hannah, who seems to have been looking for him, approaches us. She gets close to Jake and puts her hand on his chest while looking at me as if to say he is hers. I try to stifle a smile but apparently fail as she looks at me now with an angry frown. Seriously, they really need to tell her. She gets even closer to him. I look at him, smiling widely now as he doesn't seem to understand what is going on. He looks at me and then realises what's happening so he pulls away a bit and brings her back inside. I still stay a bit longer outside. Lilly joins me after a few minutes. I can see the resemblance between her and Jake, they have the same eyes but Lilly's have a warmth to them that isn't there in Jake's.

Me: You haven't told Hannah about Jake.

Lilly: How do you know?

Me: Her behaviour. You don't do that with your brother. I know it's none of my business but you should tell her sooner rather than later.

Lilly: We talked about it and we think it's better to wait until she is more stable.

Me: What do you think will happen now? or later? It will be exactly the same at least now she isn't completely in love with him and it will be easier to recover from that.

Lilly: But... She is with Thomas?

Me: Doesn't matter. Old feelings can always come back especially if he is still as nice as he was online when they first met.

Lilly: I guess you are right. We should tell her and do that rather quickly.

I nod, there is nothing else I can say. She sighs.

Lilly: Also, Jake wants me to talk to you.

Me: Seriously, Lilly? There is nothing else to say. I said what I wanted to say, he didn't want to talk to me for 6 months and he just appears as if I haven't been waiting for him. Don't get me wrong, I am glad that he is alive and well. And free?

Lilly: Yes, he is free. I think he should...

Me: Lilly, enough. I don't think I can get over my disappointment like that. He didn't want me, it's fine. I can live with that. At least, now, I have my answer and I won't keep wondering what happened to him. I just don't want to talk about it tonight. That's not why I am here. Not for him.

As the conversation ends, Lilly goes back inside while Phil comes out. He comes to me and gives me a hug. I wrap my hands around his chest and put my head on his shoulder. He kisses the top of my head.

Phil: Thank you for looking after Jessy like that. She clearly needed it. How are you feeling?

Me: I am ok. I think. Too many emotions though. I need another drink.

He laughs and guides me back inside while holding my hand. I can feel eyes on me, I turn around and I see some of my friends watching us, puzzled. I shrug, I don't really care what they think. Phil gets behind the bar and serves me another beer and another shot. I drink the shot and I go towards the group. I sit next to Jessy with a big smile. I am happy to be here, with all of them. Jessy stands up, goes to the bar and comes back with more shots and we drink. I am starting to feel tipsy but it's a nice feeling. We get up and we start dancing while still drinking and getting obviously more drunk. Dancing with high heels, it's not easy. I walk to the table and sit down next to Jake. I take my shoes off and wriggle my red toes. Jake chuckles next to me, I turn around and I flash him with my biggest smile. I start talking to him about random stuff and he goes along, answering back. I put my feet on the chair, it gets me closer to him and my knees fall onto his lap. While I am still talking, not really realising what is happening, I see him looking down and up at my legs. His eyes stop at the part of my tattoo sticking out underneath the dress. He looks up at me, a bit embarrassed at being caught. I smile and I see Hannah coming over with an angry face but when Jake looks at her, she gives him a wide smile and she sits down next to him. Jessy grabs my arm and tells me to go back on the dancefloor. We dance for a few songs and then my favourite song is playing. I turn to Jake and he is still talking to Hannah. Well, Hannah is talking to him while he is staring at me, nodding along. I run towards them, I grab his hands and bring him with me on the dancefloor. I wrap my arms around his neck and I lay my head on his chest. He takes him a few seconds to realise what is happening and finally he gently grabs my waist and brings me closer to him. We move slowly with the music. I move my arms around his chest and he tightens his hold on my waist. I close my eyes and I enjoy the moment. I was saying earlier that it was nice being held by a man again but this is way better. There is a connection there that I didn't feel with Phil. I am still disappointed with him but I am guessing that he will easily be able to find a way for me to forgive him. The song ends but I don't want to move. The next song is playing and we still stay that way. After a while we pull away from each other, Jake is smiling at me, I think he didn't expect me to do that. I stand on my toes and whisper in his ear.

Me: Thank you for dancing with me but you are not forgiven.

Jake: I understand. Will you have a coffee with me tomorrow when you are sober?

I nod and smile at him. Jessy brings me back to reality and we dance till the end of the night.

==============================================

The end

#duskwood #duskwood mc #duskwood jake x mc #duskwood fandom #everbyte studios

[shinydixon]

you know what sucks the most? having people invalidating us when we point out the homophobia, biphobia and transphobia some of that girl's stans have inside them. it's really fucking easy for a straight person to just come out and say we're being dramatic and that they 'support' lgbtq+. they don't. that's just some bullshit to save face. we KNOW when people are judging us for our sexuality. we can feel it on our skin. we know how to pick apart the narrative that they just want to say steddie isn't canon. if they were truly on our side, the idea of steddie wouldn't bother them. if they were truly so open minded, they wouldn't mind that people saw chemistry between eddie and steve and started shipping them. and if they were truly TRULY so cool and pro-lgbtq, they would know that even if it isn't canon, the possibility would still be there. because sexuality is fluid, sometimes it takes YEARS to find out what we really and what makes us happy. these stans would understand that steddie could have happened. but no, they're on twitter trying to prove that steve and eddie are straight and straight only. i even saw a stupid tweet where this girl said eddie is straight because he has condoms. LMAO. the sheer stupidity of that tweet makes me sad. what are they teaching these people about sex? and if they were that unbothered, they wouldn't try to start a war every time someone criticized the ship, chrissy and the girl who plays her. i mostly see steddie fans living their lives and creating some really beautiful art and texts. when you have to go to an author of an article about a CHARACTER and bully her enough to the point she wants to write another article just so she won't be cancelled and eaten alive by these parasites, then you're not unbothered. in fact, you're very much bothered and raging. on one hand i think it's nice that steddie lives in their heads rent free, apparently. on the other hand, i wish they'd just leave us alone. there are a lot of kids saying these shit and that i can even let it pass because i remember being a teen and fighting for my ship as if my life depended on it. but to see these grown ass people pulling this kind of shit??? it's sad. it must be miserable to be a hellcheer fan, good lord. all the drama and the whining and the vanquinns (that is so fucking creepy i don't even have words for it) and the going everyday on twitter to see if there's anything they can ruin for steddie shippers....it's quite a mental work out.

My gosh, I agree with you nonnie 😞🤍🤍🤍

[pbandjesse]

My manager, Jessica, just texted me that all the schools canceled tomorrow. Which sucks but a free, mostly, day off for me. I hope to do lots of quilting and knitting. And I still am working tomorrow night unless something changes. So I'm pretty happy. And honestly I hope the weather is interesting. That would make me happy.

Today was pretty good though. I wasn't feeling great for a lot of it honestly. I was stressed about my meeting with Jessica with the national guard. I spoke to so many Jessica's today. Honestly it's hilarious.

But besides my fears about that meeting, mostly about not knowing where to park, I had a good day.

I woke up at 7. James was sitting in bed with me. It's nice seeing them without their sling. And while they are hurting they are trying very hard to stretch and start building up some muscles.

I got washed and dressed and felt very cozy. I should have worn a coat today, as it was much colder, but I did not. But it was fine. We left and James drove us.

They are having trouble getting their arm to move upwards, apparently it feels like rubber bands, super tensioned. But I'm very proud of them for trying. They got me breakfast and we went to work.

I was an hour early. So I would eat and chill in the back. Jim came and we talked about Christmas stuff. He says all he really wants are printed photos of his grandkids and kids all framed. I thought that was very sweet.

And it was a fun day. We had a Christian private school and the kids were so cute in their uniforms. The saddle shoes and the cardigans and little ties. Just so sweet.

And it was such small classes. I had the 4th graders and there were only 7 of them. We love a low ratio.

They were also so super sweet. They had notebooks and took notes the whole time. Their teacher was an older man and he was great, they obviously respected him a ton. And he had great points to add throughout the tour. I think I gave a pretty good tour and tried to really focus on dates and numbers and spelled words I thought would be useful for their projects. They are going to write reports on things that made them interested. And so when they seemed excited I would expand on things. We were supposed to hit 5 galleries because they came early but we didn't even need that in the end. I was able to end my tour at the ring of fire, where John's older kids joined me, and then they were off to lunch.

After lunch O'Malley and my groups came together for a scavenger hunt. And I worked on my glove. Which I realized was slightly longer the the first glove. Thankfully not by a ton but annoying. I have to finish the edges but I'm excited anyway.

And at the end of the scavenger hunt a 3rd and a 4th grade group got 8 of the 11 questions correct and got to pick prizes. Erasers and buttons and marbles. I love how excited they get about my silly little prize box.

I took my group to the restoration classroom and we did the roller coaster project. Their teacher required that they draw out and label their rollercoaster in their notebook first. Which is fine by me. It was fun. And they did such a good job. I built my example and they loved trying that and then building their own. Though it was very funny when the teacher was like yeah that looks nice but it won't work!! And then it did and he was like. What!!!! Amazing!!

Once we were done and cleaned up they got to sit in the car. We had to wait for O'Malley's group to be done but that was alright. And then to the gift shop.

I made sure I said goodbye to everyone. The kids told me they had so much fun and that I was the best. What sweethearts.

I went to clean up the classroom and put things away. And soon I would join James in the back office. They brought me a donut. And the I went to take over the front desk.

Which was mostly good except someone came to buy something in the case and I could not figure out how to scan it in and James had to leave their meeting to come save me and I felt very dumb. But the lady was really nice and I suggested she check out Avam's giftshop since she was in the area. I hope she does cause her vibe made me think she would like it.

I finished up my glove. And no one else came in and soon I was able to leave. To go to the armory and meet with Jessica.

I was nervous. I took the long way. But was still early. Not a huge deal. The security guard was nice. And Jessica met me at the door.

The meeting went well. I am getting paid more then my regular workshop rate. I bought all the materials while I was there. We discussed what they had and what I might need. And I told them about my teddy bear workshop and they may be interested in running on as well!! So that's really cool. I felt like a real professional artist.

I was excited to go home. I was a little confused about how to get out of the parking lot but that was fine in the end. And I got home and changed into a different sweatshirt. And laid on the couch to wait for James to come home.

They would get back here and make dinner. And after dinner they ride their stationary bike and I worked in my studio. Half way down my large quilt squares.

I would go lay down after an hour or so. And James took a shower. I heard them go "oh no oh no!" And I'm like what?? Thinking something was wrong with their arm. But actually their new earrings was missing. They are pretty disappointed. But I gave them the other gold hoop I have so now we can match and I think it looks so cute on them. And who knows, maybe the other one will show up. It's a low change but not none.

Now we are in bed. James painted their nails. I took a bubble bath. And now I don't have to wake up early. I hope I have a productive art day. And have a fun event tomorrow evening.

I hope you all sleep great tonight. Stay safe if you are affected by the storm! Goodnight!!