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#(two so become one as they both become two)
sansaorgana · 2 days
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— THROWN TO THE WOLVES (VIII)
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PART ONE || PART TWO || PART THREE PART FOUR || PART FIVE || PART SIX PART SEVEN
PAIRING — Na-Baron Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen x fem!Reader // Atreides!OC
SUMMARY — Giedi Prime celebrates Feyd-Rautha's birthday and the hundredth kill in the arena. Meanwhile, na-baroness gets reminded by The Baron who pulls the strings and finds out unpleasant truth about the promise her aunt has given to the Bene Gesserit.
AUTHOR’S NOTE — It’s written as an usual x Reader fic without describing anything about the Reader’s looks but I still classified it as an OC as well since she is Paul Atreides’ half-sister. I wasn't sure what titles Feyd's children would have but since his brother is a Count, I assumed his children would be C(o)unts and C(o)untesses. I mean, his eldest son would become na-baron but only after his father would become The Baron, I assume 🤔 Next chapter we go to Arrakis, babes!!! 🤭 Thank you for all your comments, reblogs and messages! 💕
WARNINGS — arranged marriage, mentions of sexual activities (no actual smut), violent behaviour, death, syringes, mentions of planned and scientifical breeding, blood pact
WORD COUNT — 6,670
ENGLISH IS MY SECOND LANGUAGE.
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THROWN TO THE WOLVES (VIII)
You were laying on an examination table and staring at the black ceiling above you while the medic was busy with noting down some things and injecting you with vitamins, minerals and proteins. It was the day of Feyd-Rautha’s hundredth kill and his birthday but you hadn’t spent much time with him the past few days since he was restraining himself physically before the fight.
You still shared one bed with him, though. He wasn’t avoiding you as much as he had been the last time.
“How do you feel, na-baroness?” The medic asked and you smirked at him.
“Like you care about it,” you pointed out. “We both know you only care about the child.”
“I care about what I am being told to care about, my Lady. I follow orders,” he explained. “I asked na-baron the other day whether I should do everything to keep you in the best state possible or focus strictly on the child, na-baroness. He wanted me to ensure you would be alright,” he added and you tried your best not to show how surprised you were.
“He really said that?” You only asked.
“Well…” the medic looked down and laughed nervously, “he said that you might still be useful later, my Lady. Forgive my words.”
“The words are not yours, therefore you do not have to apologise for them,” you assured him. “Anyway, if I ordered for you to be killed, who would make sure I am alright?” You teased with a smile and he sighed with relief.
“So, how do you feel, na-baroness?” He repeated the previous question.
“I feel… different,” you told him. “I have these cravings…”
“Cravings are perfectly normal during pregnancy, my Lady,” he nodded his head.
“Yes, I understand. But recently I want to eat the same food as my husband although I still find it quite disgusting but… I still crave it. Feyd says it’s the child being whimsy but he is no medic…”
“It will pass,” the medic looked up at you and assured you. “The cravings will pass, my lady, after the pregnancy. Your husband is right about the child.”
“Other than that, except for feeling a little emotional at times, I do not experience any side effects of pregnancy. I don’t even feel sick in the mornings,” you told him.
“Yes, because I am trying my best to make this process go as smoothly as possible for you, my Lady,” he smiled and noted something down again.
“But…” you furrowed your brows, remembering something that had been worrying you lately. He looked up at you. “You see, during the celebration, I talked to my previous maids, perhaps you remember them. And they are pregnant, too. One of them told me the Harkonnen pregnancies are different and she warned me.”
The medic sighed and leaned back in the chair as he hesitated for a while whether he should explain this whole situation to you or not.
“There is no such thing as Harkonnen pregnancy, my Lady. We are humans just like you are,” he reminded you. “It’s the centuries of living on this heavily polluted planet that made us look the way we do and mutated some of our DNA but we are not of different species.”
“I understand,” you nodded. “Forgive me, I did not want to insult your culture.”
“Na-baroness does not have to apologise,” he bowed his head down slightly. “You see, our women are not very fertile because of the atmosphere on this planet. That is why our… medicine… has progressed so much. We needed to find an artificial way of ensuring population growth. The Harkonnen women – even boosted with injections – usually weaken a lot during pregnancies. But their bodies do not change much. When it comes to off-world women…” He hesitated once again and you sat up, listening very carefully. “Let’s say, your body treats your son as a foreign element. He is half Harkonnen – with the best genetic material from his father, of course – but your… clean and healthy body treats him as something polluted and poisonous. And what happens, my Lady, when you spill a drop of poison into someone’s drink?” He asked you.
“Diffusion,” you gasped and he nodded. Your heart skipped a beat. “So, the child is poisoning me?” You swallowed thickly as you asked. You could feel all your limbs go weak at the thought.
“No, na-baroness, not with me around,” he chuckled and shook his head. “But your former maids do not have such medical innovations, I’m afraid.”
“Will they die then?” You asked.
“No, they will not die. And their bodies might go back to normal some time after the pregnancy, once the blood gets rid of all the… toxins,” he added. “Forgive me, I did not mean to scare you, my Lady. And it brings me no pleasure to admit how truly poisoned our people are. It feels humiliating in a way.”
“So I have nothing to worry about?” You stood up and watched him carefully. He was visibly hiding something from you.
“Na-baroness doesn’t have to worry about the child taking away her strength, no,” he only said.
“What should I worry about then?” You raised your eyebrow at him, demanding an answer. You could see him panicking a little. He was the Baron’s loyal servant but you were being pushy and he was aware of the power you had recently gained. He couldn’t just lie to you so easily nowadays.
“I think you have been thinking of it, too, my Lady, of that possibility,” he whispered and you furrowed your brows. “Your mother, she… She died in childbirth, did she not? And everyone keeps saying how much you look like her, my Lady.”
“My mother did not die because she was weak in flesh,” you explained to him although you became nervous when he mentioned that. “She died because she was weak in mind. She couldn’t bear to live with my father in a loveless union. It killed her that on the day I was born he was with his pregnant lover. She died of sadness,” you informed him and he widened his eyes a little at that. You were aware that your explanation was not exactly very medically accurate.
“I can only say that I will try my best for the same thing not happening to you, na-baroness,” he stood up as well and bowed down, making you feel stupid for your outburst. Of course he was right. Your mother had died because she had lost too much blood.
She had died because of you.
Because of a child with a man she hadn’t loved. Because of a child she probably hadn’t even wanted in the first place.
Your whole life you had been imagining your life with her. How much she would love and cherish you. But what if she would not? Now, more than ever, pregnant with Feyd-Rautha’s son, you understood what your mother had gone through. She had been forced to give birth to you and she had paid the biggest price for it.
“I… I should leave now and prepare for the event,” you told the medic and he nodded at you and watched you walk out of the room.
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You walked through the dark corridor being led by the guards. You had been there before, a few days after your wedding, being taken to Feyd-Rautha preparing for his fight, scared of his reaction to see you disobeying him with the choice of your dress. These past few months, lots of things had changed. You walked confidently now with your head held high and waited for the guard to open the big, black doors in front of you.
You walked inside the room and spotted your husband in the middle of it, surrounded by the servants putting black paint stripes on his bare chest. One of the male servants was presenting the knives on a black, velvet cushion.
They all turned around to see you approaching them and you purposefully took your time while walking gracefully in a dress that was supposed to be one of his birthday presents. It was a mix of black latex – one of your new favourite fabrics – and black silk. Delicacy and vulgarity mixed together, wrapped around your curves and revealing just enough to let the imagination run free but not enough to actually reveal anything that belonged to Feyd-Rautha only. Your hair was loose but you wore a beautiful black diadem that had been a gift from one of the lords, given to you during the celebration feast thrown in your honour.
“Well, well, well,” Feyd’s eyes squinted at the sight of you as you stood right in front of him. You hadn’t seen him at all this morning because he had woken up very early to prepare. “I was just about to check the blade,” he pointed at one of the knives on the cushion. You saw terror in the eyes of the servants standing behind him.
Feyd reached out for the knife and balanced it a little in his hand before facing you and opening his mouth to show off his long tongue and licking the tip of the blade. You nearly gasped at the vulgarity of this act that made you ache in your core after a few days of not being touched by him at all. In your head, you imagined him dropping to his knees and burying his face right between your legs. It was making you feel dizzy to think of that and the tension between you two seemed to be under voltage.
But when you spotted his wrist tilting a bit, you already knew what would happen now.
“Tsk, tsk,” you hissed at him and he froze, confusedly looking at you. “It’s time to grow up, don’t you think?” You asked, teasingly. “Only spoiled little boys discard their toys so easily.”
You liked his bloodthirst and found it more than useful but you didn’t like to watch innocent slaves being killed for fun. You knew that it was not the custom of all Harkonnens to do that. A common lord would not kill so easily mostly because it would cost him money to get another slave. But Feyd couldn’t care less about the material aspect of it.
“Also, I do not understand why you decide to restrain yourself from fucking me but you can’t restrain yourself from killing before the actual fight in the arena. It makes no sense to me,” you added. “You need to be as railed up as possible.”
After a short while he lowered his hand and put the knife back on the cushion as the servants behind him sighed with relief.
“It’s not balanced properly,” he told the male servant. “Bring me another one, you useless sack of meat,” he ordered and the nervous man bowed down before hurrying out of the room.
“Good boy,” you praised Feyd, proud of yourself.
It was one thing to make him kill for you but it was another to stop him from killing.
“You want to weaken me,” he drawled through the gritted teeth. He was already railed up to the maximum and it was delicious to see him in such a state.
“Me?” You asked, playfully. “Far from that,” you explained. “I want you to be a rabid dog today, do you understand me?” You took a step forward to grab his crotch as your face remained inches away from his. The servants behind him widened their eyes and you felt a shiver going down his starved body. “Today is very important, my pet,” you whispered. “Do not disappoint me,” your hand squeezed him and let go as fast as you felt him hardening under your palm.
Feyd smirked at you.
“Rabid dog,” he only nodded, “for my Baroness,” he added and you felt a wave of pleasure crawling all the way through your skin.
You leaned in to cup his cheeks and place a kiss upon his forehead.
“Accept my blessing,” you breathed out, “and happy birthday, my darling”.
You took a step back and smiled faintly at him before bowing down slightly –  pure act of mockery after showing your unquestionable dominance – and walking away to leave the room to let him continue his preparations.
“I will make you proud,” you heard his voice when the guards opened the doors in front of you. To that, you gave no answer as you left the chamber and placed both of your hands protectively on your abdomen.
The truth was, he had no idea how important that fight could be for the both of you. Baron Harkonnen hadn’t spoken to you a lot the past few days and you had no idea if he had decided to listen to your advice or not. For a while you wanted to warn Feyd about such a possibility but you knew that it would only take away satisfaction and pleasure from him. And it was his birthday. He deserved his gift.
That is, if The Baron had listened to you.
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After being announced, you waved at the Giedi Prime citizens gathered in the arena as they cheered loudly at the sight of you. You gave them a wide but dignified smile before sitting on the chair next to the Baron’s and taking your binoculars from his servant.
“You will be pleased,” Baron told you as he watched you from the corner of his eye and puffed on his pipe.
“There are a lot of ways to please me, my Lord. Care to specify?” You teased and you swore, one of his eyes twitched at that.
“He will be given three Atreides soldiers that we kept imprisoned after taking over Arrakis. You might even recognise them,” Baron explained.
“I doubt,” you winced. “I never paid attention to soldiers,” you explained. “Not as individuals, I mean.”
“Well, you better pay attention to one of them now because he is not drugged,” Baron informed you and your heart skipped a beat at the revelation.
It made you both excited and terrified. You couldn’t show any of this to the Baron so you just nodded your head at him.
“If my nephew dies today, it will be on you,” he chuckled.
“It has no significance to you, does it? Your next heir is already in the making,” you pointed out sternly and caressed your womb. You dropped your formalities with him nearly at all because you felt that you no longer had to address him as my Lord. Not only you had advanced in his eyes in the ladder of his enemies but you also held the title of Duchess Atreides.
Oh, you had just realised. You really were Duchess Atreides now. And you would watch your husband murdering your own soldiers. That was dark, you had to admit. Baron still had his spirit.
“If my nephew turns out to be so weak to be killed today by a mid Atreides soldier, I am sure his son will be no better,” Baron’s voice got serious again and it caused a chill to go down your spine.
Well, you were trapped. Feyd had to win, otherwise you and your son would die, too. How stupid you had been to think that the Baron wouldn’t twist the game for his own gain.
“We will have to find a way to plant a better seed in your cunning womb then, my Baroness,” his eyes sparkled at you and then he brought the binoculars to his face and watched the arena.
You turned your head around to hide the way your body gagged at his words. You’d rather him to kill you than find a way to implant his spawn inside your womb, even if it would not even require touching him.
You took a deep breath in and watched Feyd entering the arena through your binoculars as the crowd cheered. What had you done…? Had you outplayed yourself? Would it be your end?
Your shaking hand squeezed your womb as if you wanted to comfort your son although he was too small to be stressed about it.
It’s going to be alright, you kept thinking, pretending you were talking to your child. Your father’s going to win it, my little one, don’t you worry.
You were so lost in the thoughts of stress and anxiety that your senses got numbed for a while and you came back to reality only when the whole arena was filled with a loud cheer as Feyd’s first opponent was killed.
You sighed with relief as he had only two to go now. You focused on the man who was not drugged and you realised that you indeed recognised him. He was an excellent warrior and it made you feel uneasy.
You tried not to look at the Baron at all but you could feel his eyes on you. And not only his.
You looked up through your binoculars and saw that on the balcony in front of you, the Bene Gesserit sisters were sitting together. Not only the local one but lots of them – hiding in the shadows behind their veils. Watching you.
You wondered if one of them was your aunt. Probably.
“Don’t you just hate them?” You fought your disgust and fear as you spoke up.
“Hm?” Baron asked.
“The Bene Gesserit,” you explained. “Their schemes and plans, they interfere with yours a lot, don’t they? Don’t you hate how much power they hold even over you?”
“Well, what would you propose to do with them? I can’t just throw them out,” he laughed at you.
“Why not? If I was The Baroness, I’d limit their influence in the Harkonnen systems,” you told him and he brought the binoculars down as the crowd cheered when Feyd dealt with another drugged warrior.
“Then perhaps you are not ready to become her yet,” Baron squinted his eyes at you.
“Why is that?” You brought your binoculars down as well and dared to turn your head around to face him as if you were accepting a challenge.
“You cannot reject customs so old and so common throughout the galaxy if you want to be a respectable House and not an outsider. I thought you’d know that, it’s basic knowledge,” he explained.
“I thought The Harkonnens were richer than the Emperor himself and with an army much bigger than his. Houses of such influence don’t have to care about the rules. They make them. I thought you’d know that, it’s basic knowledge,” you drawled.
If Feyd would win this fight, you would remain untouchable. If he would die, your life would be hell anyway. You had nothing to lose. You could speak to The Baron however you wished. At least your anger was telling you this and it was very tempting to listen to it.
But The Baron only chuckled at you.
“I like your fierceness. It is obvious you hold lots of hatred towards the Bene Gesserit but you cannot let your personal judgement overshadow the real situation. They can be useful,” he told you.
“I guess they can be,” you shrugged your arms and brought the binoculars back to your face.
“If it wasn’t for them, your dead body would rot in the Arrakis’ desert now,” Baron reminded you and you swallowed thickly.
You had other things to worry about now. Feyd was left alone with the undrugged Atreides warrior and he was struggling to win that one. You clutched on the edge of your chair with one of your hands as you watched him being nearly killed over and over. He was fighting back excellently but his opponent was more equal to him and his skills than you’d like him to be. You could see on the people’s faces that they all held their breaths.
But none of their lives were in as much danger as yours in the case of your husband’s death.
Your anxiety turned your hands cold and formed a gulp in your throat that was making you feel nauseous as you watched Feyd getting rid of all his cheating devices that were supposed to make him safe. He was full of adrenaline and wanted to show off – to make you proud. But he had no idea how much it all could ruin your life in the process.
“What is he doing?” Even Baron’s servant was shocked.
“Showing his worth,” Baron chuckled.
You wanted to scream at The Baron to make it stop and it was physically hurting you that you had to restrain yourself from doing so. You couldn’t show weakness but not only were you worried about yourself and your child but you had also just realised you were worried about your husband’s life.
It was an odd discovery but when you thought that you’d never be able to hear him call you pet or have him fuck you, you would miss it dearly. If you’d never be able to cup his angry face and watch it relax at your sweet cooing, you would be very upset.
It was pure torture to watch him fight now and struggle with the Atreides soldier. There was no way the Baron didn’t see the way your legs and arms were shaking. But it probably brought him nothing but pleasure.
When Feyd definitely killed the brave opponent and was announced a winner as he screamed in victory and raised his blade, you still couldn’t believe that it was happening for real. You needed a moment to go back to reality and when the cheers of Giedi Prime citizens reached your ears, you stood up abruptly. The people cheered even louder now at the sight of you and you approached the railing to look down at your husband.
You were aware that all binoculars at the moment were pointed at you so you tried not to show a hint of fear and nothing but pride. In Feyd’s eyes you spotted a sparkle at the sight of your satisfaction with his performance.
You turned around and passed the chuckling Baron without the word to reach the elevator as your guard followed you without a word. You wanted to be with your husband now.
It seemed like forever until the elevator was finally down and you hurried out of it to run through the dark corridor to reach the doors to Feyd’s chamber. On your way you spotted the Harkonnen servants dragging dead bodies of his opponents but you didn’t even flinch.
“Stay outside,” you ordered the guard and he nodded before you pushed the doors open and entered the room.
Feyd was standing there shirtless and smirking proudly at himself as the medic was tending his fresh wounds with some sort of liquid. You approached them and the medic bowed down at you as he moved out of your way.
You cupped your husband’s face and brought it down to press his forehead to yours. He was a bit taken aback by the aggressiveness of your moves.
“You did it, Feyd. You did it,” you felt tears streaming down your face and he furrowed his brows at your reaction. He grabbed your wrists and pushed you away slightly.
“You knew,” he only said and clenched his jaw. “You knew about that man not being drugged, did you not?” His pupils darkened. “What game are you playing? Trying to get rid of me with my uncle, huh? You want to be his little Baroness instead?”
“My Lord…” The medic tried to interfere seeing the way your husband was twisting your wrists to cause you pain. But Feyd only gave him a deadly glare.
Sometimes rabid dogs would bite their owners, too. You weren’t scared of him, though. He was confused and jealous.
“My darling, not only I knew but it was also my idea,” you told him and he froze to take a better look at your face. You smiled at him. “And now everyone on Giedi Prime respects you for the warrior you are. I have seen you train many times before, I thought the way your uncle gives you drugged warriors is humiliating to you,” you explained softly. “I couldn’t tell you before because it would spoil your fun. Happy birthday, Feyd,” you added.
He softened in an instant and let go of your wrists only to grab them again and bring them to his lips and shower them with hungry and sloppy kisses that would later leave the red marks. His kisses were never soft or gentle, you suspected he wouldn’t know how to kiss like that.
“Leave us,” you whispered almost inaudibly to the medic and he bowed down before walking outside the room.
When Feyd finished soothing your wrists, he pulled you closer to him and you placed a kiss on his forehead.
“You made me proud,” you told him and picked up the bowl of liquid the medic had left behind as you began to tend your husband’s wounds yourself. He shivered when your fingertip touched him gently for the first time and you shushed him quietly. “When you killed your harpies, your uncle caught me in an empty room and told me that the other lords call you weak now. I told him to give you a real warrior so the lords stop their whispers. But my real agenda was to show the nobility of Giedi Prime that you are a worthy successor,” you shared the details of your plan with him.
“What do you mean he caught you in an empty room?” Feyd’s jaw clenched.
“That is not important now, my pet,” you shook your head with a chuckle. Your fingers worked delicately and slowly on his smooth skin. You doubted anyone had ever touched him this way before.
“One victory like this is not enough,” he pointed out.
“I know. But now it’s going to be easier. We still have to be patient, though,” you looked up to meet his gaze. “Here, it’s done,” you announced and put the bowl away.
“You should leave before I ravage you,” he looked you up and down with so much hunger in his eyes that you felt as if you were already naked in front of him.
“You think I don’t feel the same after all these days of not feeling you?” You laughed at him. “Do it,” you dared him and his eyes widened. “I trust you won’t hurt me despite your starvation,” you teased.
Some part of you really trusted him. Perhaps because he was the only person in the world you could trust amongst the Harkonnens and you desperately wanted an ally.
Your plan would only work out if you had Feyd by your side.
“Later,” he shook his head, surprising you with the level of his self-discipline. “I can wait a few more hours but I will not risk the safety of my heir,” he explained.
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The birthday celebrations started but Feyd was not very excited about them. He had been way more interested in the celebration thrown for you and your son than about his own. He seemed to be bored and all the gifts presented to him were making him nod his head without any enthusiasm whatsoever. Birthdays were not celebrated as officially as other holidays on Giedi Prime so you were able to roam freely around the room and talk to people while he was doing his own thing. However, you were growing tired and exhausted. It was evening already and all the stress you had experienced earlier wore you out. 
You felt Feyd’s hands on your shoulders and you turned around to face him with a smile.
“I’m bored here,” he told you.
“It’s your birthday, you should be celebrating,” you caressed his cheek.
“I’d rather celebrate with you upstairs,” he smirked and you nodded softly. “I’ll go talk to my uncle now as he wishes to see me and you go to the bedroom and wait there for me,” he ordered and you leaned in to peck his lips. 
“Don’t take too long, I have more gifts for you,” you told him and his eyes sparkled as he nodded his head and walked away to go to his uncle.
You excused yourself using your fragile state and you left the dining room to go upstairs. Once again you were not guarded but this time you decided not to wander around the yet unexplored rooms and go straight to yours.
When you were about to reach the staircase, you heard someone else’s footsteps behind you. They weren’t as heavy as the usual steps of the Harkonnen guards or lords but they still made your heart sink in your chest. You turned around and spotted the local Bene Gesserit woman standing a few steps behind you. You wanted to sigh with relief but you were not stupid to think that her presence meant you were safe. Quite the opposite.
“What do you want?” You asked her.
“To talk,” she approached you and took her veil off. You were surprised to see that she was a regular woman like you were. You had never been able to spot that from behind the veil covering her face.
“Talk about what?” You gritted your teeth and she reached her hand out towards your womb. You hissed at her and grabbed her wrist to stop her.
“I mean no harm,” she assured you and pressed her hand to your abdomen for a while. Then she hummed to herself and took the hand away. “Impressive. Your aunt barely managed to convince the sisters to allow this union because your genes were not as strong as they wanted Feyd-Rautha’s children to have. However, I see that the Harkonnen medicine is progressing greatly,” she pointed out. “They brought the best out of you.”
“I don’t like the way you speak of me,” you snapped. “You don’t address me properly and you dare to insinuate my genes are not good enough to bear my husband’s offspring.”
Bene Gesserit smirked at you. She didn’t seem to care about your little outburst at all.
“However, it’s a boy,” she continued. “I mean, of course it is. I didn’t expect the Harkonnens to want anything else,” she added. “Your next one shall be a girl.”
“Excuse me?” You took a step back and clenched your jaw. “What I have next is my business. Mine and my husband’s, that is,” you placed your hand on your womb protectively.
“If you don’t give Feyd-Rautha a daughter, my Lady,” she emphasised ironically and you raised an eyebrow at her, “then I will.”
You nearly gasped at her insolence. Rage filled your whole body hearing her words. She threatened to lay with your husband? While she was inside your home?
“If you bewitch my husband, I will have you killed. I do not care about any of you,” you threatened her back.
“Your aunt promised us that you would be easy to control. As we both know, that is not true but we can let that slip. However, we will not give up on the promised daughter,” she explained calmly.
“Wh-what?” You stuttered out.
“Your aunt promised us that your first born daughter will be trained to become Bene Gesserit,” the woman answered and you felt a stinging pain in your chest.
Your aunt… whom you had never even met in your life. Of whom you had had no idea for most of your life. Yet she seemed to be the mastermind behind it all because of your grandfather’s sick ambitions to put his granddaughter on the Harkonnen throne. And your father… He passively had allowed that all to happen as Lady Jessica had cheered. 
“Is she here?” You barked at her. “My aunt? I want to talk to her.”
“The other sisters have left already, I’m afraid, na-baroness,” the woman told you. 
“If I have a daughter one day, I will not give her away to you witches,” you pointed your finger at her.
“There will be no need. She will stay here and I will train her,” she explained. “The Harkonnen countess would not be treated like a regular sister. Of course such powerful members have their privileges.”
“I still don’t want you near any of my children,” you told her angrily. “And I want you to stay away from Feyd.”
“You’re scared,” she smirked as she approached you, “because you know my poison is more effective than yours. I could really bind him to me in a way that is not accessible to you. You don’t hate us for witchcraft. You hate us because you’re not one of us,” she dared to whisper to you.
“I prefer holding less power but not being a blind follower of any idea nor force but myself and my own desires,” you answered proudly and straightened yourself.
You will obey me.
The loud and overwhelming voice boomed inside your head. You knew that voice very well. You had been growing up with it around.
“I will obey you,” you nodded and turned around to walk away but after a while you managed to fight this staggering sensation numbing your brain. “I will not,” you said.
“What did you say?” Bene Gesserit asked, surprised. You turned around to face her once again.
“I will not,” you repeated.
“How did you do that?” Her eyes widened.
“Growing up around Lady Jessica… You think I didn’t learn how to disobey your cursed voice?” You asked her with contempt. She didn’t have to know how much it costed you each time to be able to do that. You wanted her to think it was easy.
“That is impossible,” the woman shook her head. “You could not learn that by yourself.”
“Yet I did,” you shrugged your arms. “And no offence, but Lady Jessica was more powerful Bene Gesserit than you are.”
“Yes, she was,” she nodded. “That is why she was able to teach you this.”
“Teach me this?” You raised your eyebrow.
“Of course. Do you think you were able to master this ancient ability to fight The Voice by yourself? She had to teach you this. I only wonder why,” she hummed to herself.
Now you wondered, too. Perhaps some part of her wanted to protect you from whatever would come in the future. Perhaps some part of her cared about you.
And you hated to be grateful to her for anything but now you were.
“I might give you a daughter next,” you told the woman in front of you. “Having a powerful Bene Gesserit as my daughter can be useful,” you remembered Baron’s words. “But if you try to pit her against me or send her away to procreate with some gross lord far away from here, that is when I will intervene and you will regret this, witch,” you warned her.
She nodded.
“And if you touch my husband…”
“With all respect, I’d rather not touch him if I don’t have to, so just give us a daughter next,” she chuckled nervously.
You smiled at her. At first you were surprised hearing her words but then you remembered that most people did not see Feyd the way you were seeing him now. To them he was scary, unhinged and temperamental and his presence was deeply unsettling.
You left her in the corridor and went upstairs to your bedroom. You regretted not seeing your aunt because there were lots of things you’d love to tell her.
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Feyd joined you in the bedroom not long after. You were dressed in a nightgown already and sitting on the chair pulled away from his desk.
“What took you so long?” You asked him when the doors closed behind him.
“He gave Arrakis to me,” your husband informed you and stood above you as your eyes sparkled.
“What? He did?”
“Apparently Rabban is humiliating himself over and over there and embarrassing our family,” Feyd gritted his teeth. “I will be named the new Governor soon.”
“Well, that’s a gift I cannot possibly beat,” you teased and beckoned him over as he fell to his knees to be able to face you.
Feyd put his hands on your thighs as he opened them with his long fingers and you chuckled softly at him.
“Such an eager pet, aren’t you?” You teased him and he looked up. “That gift has to wait. Give me a knife,” you asked him.
He was confused but he handed you a short blade he was always carrying with himself.
“It’s so pretty,” you took a better look at the dagger in awe. It was really an excellent piece of work.
“Keep it,” your husband breathed out.
“But it’s your birthday, not mine,” you caressed his cheek gently.
“You need a weapon, too. I want you to keep it, just in case. When I’m not around and my uncle catches you in an empty room… For example,” he insisted.
“I don’t even know how to use it.”
“It’s a knife,” Feyd snorted. “You just stab.”
“Well, I guess. You can teach me more when I’m not with child anymore,” you proposed.
“I can,” he nodded and leaned in to place a kiss on your womb.
“So you do know how to kiss like that,” you teased and he looked caught off guard.
“I did it like you always do it… Did I do something wrong?” He asked and you swore, you could call him adorable in a way. You couldn’t believe it was the same man who had been slaughtering his enemies in the arena earlier.
“Aw, I’m only teasing. Give me your hand,” you ordered and he raised his arm as you slit one of the lines on his exposed palm. He didn’t even wince, so used to the pain much greater than this one. And he didn’t question anything you were doing either. It was almost sad, the way he obeyed you.
You watched his blood spilling down his pale skin; so dark and thick – it was nearly black and of a slimy texture. Then you cut yourself the same way, trying not to hiss out of pain as your own blood spilled, looking much healthier than his poisoned one.
You put the blade away and held his bleeding hand with yours to squeeze it tight. Feyd looked deep into your eyes, understanding the meaning of this gesture.
“I am yours and you are mine,” you told him. “Forever from now on. Your blood is my blood, my blood is your blood. We are one,” you whispered. “You do not exist without me and I do not exist without you. Together we will build our empire,” you continued and he nodded with a very serious expression on his face. There was pure admiration in his eyes, though. “We will not allow him to come between us.”
“We will kill him,” Feyd added angrily and you nodded at him. He was so eager.
“And everyone else in our way,” you assured him. “I shall be your anchor.”
“I shall be your blade,” he promised and you leaned down to join your lips together and mix your saliva like you mixed your blood.
You let go of his hand and straightened yourself, breaking the kiss. Feyd however brought your palm to his mouth and began to lick your wound as he drank the blood that spilled. Like dogs would lick their owners’ wounds.
“If I had known he’d give you Arrakis, I’d come up with a better gift,” you joked. Feyd looked up at you with your hand still pressed to his mouth, now stained with your blood.
“Nothing he’s ever given me can match you, my Baroness,” he confessed.
You smiled at him lovingly. It was a sight no one else in the world could admire – Feyd-Rautha on his knees, obedient and in awe. You finally opened your thighs in front of his face to give him what he had been waiting for since this morning. Most likely the gift he had been anticipating the most.
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MASTERLIST
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demonic0angel · 2 days
Text
Celestial Bodies AU (maybe part 1/?)
Superman flew through space, eying the new galaxy that he and Batman had discovered the night before.
“So? What does it look like?” Batman asked him through the communications.
“Well…” Superman looked around. “It’s definitely weird. It has an enormous cluster of stars, but I’m not feeling stronger…”
“What? Are you saying that the radiation isn't working?"
"The stars here are all white stars or above, but they don't make me feel stronger. Actually... I think I'm feeling weaker too. Something is definitely wrong here."
Batman was quiet for only a moment before he asked, "Are you in any current danger? Can you defend yourself?"
"No, I'm fine. I don't sense any living beings around me. I can defend myself." Superman understood what Batman was trying to say. "Are you asking me to stay and continue observing?"
"If you can."
"Of course. I'll stay and continue investigating."
"Thank you," Batman said softly and Superman smiled at that.
"Don't sweat it! Let me get the receiver."
Superman pulled out the device that allowed him to connect to radio signals from space, and began turning it on. However, the moment it turned to life, the radio began to malfunction, short circuiting and turning into static as it shook itself. Superman nearly tossed it away before suddenly, it was normal again.
And then, the signal began to pick up.
And it began to sing.
Superman stared wide eyed as a symphony of music and singing came through the radio. It was a little choir of humming and barely audible voices, sounding as though they were underwater. Still, it was undeniably beautiful, like something heard from heaven.
"Batman," Superman said, hushed, "are you hearing this?"
"... yes."
"It's amazing! Are these stars making these sounds?" Superman continued flying, observing the blue and yellow stars, each radiating a heat that could not power him. He continued flying, listening to the ethereal song that called for listeners.
He hadn't been paying attention when he felt an ever sensed blistering heat and a force beginning to drag him forward. He turned his head and his eyes widened again before he cursed and flew a little distance away.
"Superman? What is it?"
"Batman, turn on your visuals," he said as he turned on the camera.
There was silence before Superman heard the barely audible click and then a buzz of a camera. The camera was attached to Superman and it would send the views back to Batman, allowing him to see just what Superman was freaking out over. When it turned on, Batman was silent for a moment, clearly as confused as Superman was feeling.
"... tell me what I'm seeing."
"A quasar, a protostar that is possibly becoming a blue star, a neutron star, and a black hole all coexisting right next to each other. As well as several planets all circling them like stars."
Superman watched the scene with a sense of both interest, awe, and horrified confusion.
The scene in front of him just wasn't possible. Not only would a black hole consume everything around it, there was already a quasar nearby doing the same thing with an even stronger force. However, the protostar and neutron star were fine even though they were so close, along with the few planets. The planetary nebula around the neutron star circled around each celestial object in an assembly line, flowing from the neutron star to the black hole to the quasar and then to the protostar. If the nebula wasn't taken by one celestial object, it was passed onto another.
Most of the nebula seemed to be absorbed by the quasar and protostar, but the two of them seemed to coexist in peace. The neutron star continued to spin and the black hole surrendered most of the nebula to its neighbors. The planets also spun peacefully, a few even had rings that were not taken by the quasar or black hole.
It was like only foreign objects, like Superman himself, would be absorbed.
It was fascinating. Like they were alive and knew how to live with one another.
Superman explained it to Batman in detail. Batman was silent before he said, "This shouldn't be possible. How could this occur? Unless there was some sort of external force that is keeping each astronomical object to themselves and prevents them from destroying each other, there's no way this could be a natural occurrence."
"Are you suggesting that this is man-made?"
"How could it be anything but? Aren't you listening to singing right now?"
Superman raised the receiver and the singing on the other side continued without pause, a constant symphony of voices.
"... you could be right. Do you want to try and make contact?"
"Yes. Send back a signal."
Superman pressed a few buttons on the receiver to send a radio message back and in an instant, the singing died down, leaving only a faint crackling and a water-like noise.
Biting the bullet, Superman then spoke into the receiver.
"Hello. My name is Superman, and I come from the Milky Way galaxy. I am a kryptonian from the planet Earth. I wish to peacefully connect with you, whoever you are."
More crackling.
Batman cursed softly in his ear and Superman winced, already feeling that he was too impulsive. However, just as he was about to backtrack and escape from this particular galaxy, there was a whispered, shuddery, "Hello."
Superman blinked and then called out, "H-Hello!"
There was silence again, only that underwater staticky noise coming through.
"Can I take this as you accepting my peace offering?"
"... yes."
The sound that came from the receiver seemed to come from many, all joining together into one.
There was a hitched gasp and then Batman hissed, "Keep talking! Ask them questions! Ask them if they want to make contact with us or if we can form an alliance!"
Superman nodded to himself and spoke into the receiver, "Can you see me?"
"We see you."
Superman paused and then continued in stride, "I'm sorry, but I can't see you. Can you show yourself?"
"In front of you."
There was nothing but the strange collection of celestial objects. Unless there was someone inside? It could be possible, but Superman hadn't detected anyone living around him for awhile now.
"Uh, I'm sorry, but—"
"In front of you."
Batman then said through the communicator, "Superman, the neutron star!"
The neutron star in front of him then began to spin faster and faster, before lighting up into a pulsar in the very next second.
Superman was stunned at the sight, as the radiation emitting from the neutron star passed over him over and over and over, radiating with a cold burn that resonated through his bones and made his limbs weak. The impossibly quick change from a regular neutron star into a pulsar only made him even more frightened as the radio signals made the receiver scream.
"We are here." The crackling voices said again, all as one.
Superman flew backwards, his breath caught in his throat.
"Superman?! Why did you go backwards?" Batman demanded.
Superman flinched and then he said softly, "Sorry. Instinct."
It was true. The fear that had entered his body had made him instinctively retreat. It was even worse than looking death in the eye. It was like the feeling of knowing the End of All, of knowing that your existence would be wiped out, of knowing that resistance would be futile and that your death wouldn't even be enough to save the ones you loved.
His heart pounded as he flew a little closer, enough to feel the heat from the quasar again and almost reluctantly said into the receiver, "Are you the neutron star?"
"We are all what you see in front of you."
"'We'? Are all of you speaking to me?"
The neutron star pulsed again, spinning just a little faster like before.
"I am the King. And these are my family."
The voice than switched out, a barely noticeable change in the difference because it was all the same voices speaking as one. However, now a different voice was leading.
"Ask your questions, Son of Jor-El. What do you seek?"
Superman's eyes widened. Then after a moment of silence, he said, "I am here to explore the universe and find protection for the planet I live on. Could you help us?"
"We are but objects in the sky. We will only answer questions."
Batman interrupted. "Ask them if they can see the future and if anything will happen to Earth."
Superman explained to the collection of celestial bodies, "This is my colleague and partner, Batman. We work together for Earth's safety."
"We know. He is the best of you."
There was silence from both Superman and Batman. Superman was stunned, but he also couldn't help but smile. "Yes, that is true. Can you see the future? Can you tell us if any dangers will be coming to earth."
Another voice came to life, taking the lead in speaking. "We can. Whatever comes, you and your Justice League can handle it."
Superman could hear Batman breathe a sigh of relief. Superman felt the same and he placed a hand on his heart as he gave a sigh of relief as well. "Thank goodness." Before Batman said anything, Superman asked, "Could you tell us more about yourself? How do you have a consciousness?"
The radio crackled and popped for a little while before the first voice, the one who called themself 'King' spoke up.
"We were like you once. But then I became a legend."
"Like me?" Superman asked.
Batman then said, "Ask them if they were human."
"Were you human?"
More silence.
And then—
"Yes."
Superman's eyes widened and he couldn't help but gasp in shock, a hand flying to his mouth as he stared at the celestial bodies in front of him, all of which used to be human. These enormous objects that used to be human, now forced to succumb to emptiness and spin in space without pause.
"Are... are you okay? We have magic users in our team, maybe we can offer you help?" Superman asked.
Batman hissed in the comms, "Superman! We don't even know them!"
The receiver crackled some more and the voice changed again. The sound of them being underwater seemed louder than ever.
"We are fine, Son of Jor-El. We are happy."
The person speaking switched to someone new.
"Ask your questions and then leave." The receiver quieted again. And then they spoke, "My little sister needs her rest for her rebirth."
Superman's eyes flicked over to the protostar, which was still absorbing most of the nebula. The only thing that could have possibly been 'reborn' was the protostar, as it needed to heat itself to start the transition to become a main sequence star. Was that one the little sister?
"Just two more questions, if that's alright." He could hear Batman's deep, frustrated sigh. He probably had more questions but was frustrated by Superman's curtesy and his lack of scientific curiosity. Superman knew he was annoyed but he felt an odd camaraderie with the celestial objects. He didn't want to anger them if necessary.
"Speak."
"How old are you? And will you help us again in the future?"
The receiver crackled.
The voice changed once more. "We are all far, far, far older than you imagine. Time does not work for us like other stars."
The speaker switched again. "But in human years, we have not reached our adult ages yet."
The honest confession made Superman's eyes widen, especially as he realized what they meant.
A bunch of children had turned into stars and black holes before they were even adults?
Superman was suddenly starkly reminded of Robin, Batman's sidekick, one of the very few children that he knew in their line of business. By Batman's silence, he was probably thinking along the same lines.
"Speak your last question and leave."
"Can the Justice League depend on you for further help and assistance in the future? I would like to come back if I can."
"Our King was once a hero too. Come if you need it."
That was when the quasar sent out a flare, the gases and planetary nebula around it rubbing against each other hard enough to send sparks Superman's way. It was clearly a warning, especially as the neutron star began spinning rapidly again, radiation beginning to light the air around him in a devastating chill.
"Leave," They all chorused.
Superman immediately turned away without hesitation. "Thank you very much! I will come again!"
The receiver did not speak again. Instead, the songs restarted and the voices continued to sing a song that he could not recognize. It was ethereal, if not haunting.
Superman was smiling as he left. Batman was silent in his ear and Superman finally asked, "So? What do you think?"
"... I think we need more information."
"You're just feeling soft because they said they were heroes and were also children," Superman teased.
"How do you know they weren't lying?" Batman sounded angry.
However, Superman wasn't concerned and only laughed. "Lying? For what? They could definitely rip me apart if they wanted. They even had a baby star with them."
"Hnn." The old softie definitely suddenly had a moment of heartache from remembering the baby star.
Superman glanced behind himself, where the fascinating cluster of stars, planets, and black holes all existed in harmony together. The quasar and neutron star lit the way alongside the other stars and the tiny galaxy grew smaller and smaller as Superman flew away.
Whatever this galaxy actually was, Superman would be glad if they could find the help they needed and helped the Justice League in turn.
".... let's come back in a month," Batman said, sounding like it was pulled out from his teeth.
It was good that Batman felt the same way.
Perhaps the next time Superman came, he could chat some more with this little galaxy?
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I did so much research for this, it's crazy 😭
Dan is the black hole and Danny is the neutron star. The reason is that both of them are technically star corpses (a large or high-mass collapsed or dead star can either result in nothing, a black hole, or a neutron star) and while Dan consumes everything around him, Danny is a remnant of a star before him. The planetary nebula that came from Danny going supernova is consumed by his siblings, mostly Jazz or Dani. Dan and Danny don't fight over it bc they love their sisters.
Dani is a protostar, which is also a baby star. I hc that she used to be a star before, but she's just restarting her rebirth until she becomes a black hole or a neutron star like her siblings :3
Jazz is a quasar, which is a different type of black hole, (inspired by this post I made). She and Danny light the way for their little galaxy.
Tucker and Sam are also there, as planets! They used to be stars but they're reborn as planets this time. Tucker is a desert planet with several Saturn-like rings of metals and sand. Sam is a terrestrial planet and is capable of life. All that's on her is plants and animals tho (they haven't gotten enough time to evolve yet). The rest of the crew (Valerie, Wes, etc) are also there and are planets. They never really reach the level of stars tho.
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lxkeee · 2 days
Text
TWO SIDES OF THE SAME COIN
-PART NINE
Pairing: Lucifer Morningstar x Seraphim Angel! Fem! Reader
Fandom: Hazbin Hotel
Genre: Angst (for now)
Warnings: family trauma/lore
Notes: TSOTSC finally reached 20k words, yippee!
PART ONE | PART EIGHT | PART TEN | NAVIGATION
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Azrael looked at the female angel beside him, noticing the lovestruck expression on the girl's face. He looked at her with a deadpanned expression, lips pressed together in a thin line.
Azrael's deep black eyes followed her line of sight, landing on a light blond haired short male angel with rosy spots on his cheeks, Lucifer. Azrael grimaced, watching as Lucifer talked with Michael, Lucifer's twin brother.
Azrael can hear a satisfied sigh left [Y/n]'s lips, Azrael still doesn't know why the girl is so lovestruck with the guy. Lucifer's curiosity is a looming threat, everyone in the high council of angels can feel it but they can't do anything about it as the said angel hasn't done anything yet.
Azrael sighs, grabbing the cloud pillow off the couch so he could sit beside her, the cushioned seat sinking as he sat down. He nudges her, catching her attention.
“I still don't understand what you see on that guy.” he deadpans at her and [Y/n] rolls her eyes at the taller male.
“Do you want me to take out my 50 slide presentation again on why I like him so much?” [Y/n] asked with a raised eyebrow and Azrael flinched, raising his hands in defeat.
“No, thank you.” He mumbled, shuddering as he remembers the time she presented those slides to him, which he still didn't understand why she liked the boy so much. He was zoned out during all of the presentation.
Azrael sighs, chest heavy and tight. He doesn't understand why. The thought of his best friend getting married to someone else hurt for some reason.
“Make sure you won't regret it, you're getting married to him soon.” He deadpans and [Y/n] just laughed, “I won't. He won't do anything to hurt me.” she said confidently.
Azrael rolls his eyes playfully, “You seem confident with that statement.”
[Y/n] scoffs playfully, “Because I know him.”
“Do you really know him?” Azrael retorts back, raising an eyebrow at her. [Y/n] flinches slightly, Azrael is right. She's still 25 years old and so is Lucifer, they're both very young. They still have lots to learn about each other.
It doesn't matter, Lucifer loves her and she loves him back. They have an entire eternity to know each other.
With a long exhale, she turned to look at Azrael, “Maybe I may not know him entirely but I will be able to.”
Azrael just sighs, shaking his head, “Whatever you say [n/n], but if he does something... Don't tell me I didn't tell you so.” he chuckled and [Y/n] rolls her eyes playfully at him, nudging Azrael playfully.
“Hey, I know him. He's my best friend and we've known each other the moment we existed.”
Azrael scoffs playfully at her words, “Who knows? People change.” he says, crossing his arms over his chest. [Y/n] avoided his gaze and turned to look back at Lucifer who seems to notice her.
Lucifer gave her a wink and a charming smile, sending her a kiss to her way causing for her to blush and giggle.
Azrael rolled his eyes at the scene.
“They do and I hope he changes to become a better version of himself.”
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After getting married to Lucifer, life felt good. Lucifer treated her so well, bringing her flowers everyday, giving her affections in every chance he gets.
Everything was fine until God created the first ever humans, [Y/n] knows how much of a curious man Lucifer is, naturally, he went out to observe them.
It created cracks in their relationship.
Lucifer began to go home later than usual, occasionally forgetting to give her affections.
And their topics—his topics have now shifted to God's newly created creature, a woman named Lilith.
[Y/n] had to endure the pain and heartache as she listens to her husband talk so fondly about the woman, complimenting Lilith in every possible chance he gets.
But nevertheless, [Y/n] remained to have confidence in him. Choosing to trust him, he is her husband after all. They've been together for many eons, she knows him.
Does she?
No, she doesn't.
Especially on what she's currently witnessing, [Y/n] hid between a large tree in the garden of Eden. She had the urge to check up on Lucifer, her instinct was screaming for her to do so.
Her nails are buried in the bark of the tree, ichor flows out of her fingertips as she tries to prevent a sob from escaping her lips. The wooden sensation of the wood against her fingertips, the stinging pain of the scratched skin of the tips of her fingers is what she felt.
With the additional sensation of the aching feeling that came from where her heart lies.
Warmth slid down her cheeks, bringing her gold covered fingertips to feel her skin.
Tears, the tears never seem to stop running down her beautiful yet sorrowful face.
Her eyes locked on to her husband, Lucifer—who looked at Lilith with so much affection in his eyes as he held the woman's hand.
‘Why... Why is he looking at her like how he used to look at me...?’
[Y/n] asked herself repeatedly in her mind. Each word got louder and louder on her mind, and each time she did, pain became more apparent to her internal voice as she asked herself in anguish.
‘Move... I need to leave... Move [Y/n]!’ she cried to herself, her mind screaming for her to leave. To save herself from even more heartbreak.
Yet, she remained still. Eyes fixed on the two.
Her hands slapped over her mouth to prevent sobs from escaping her plump and soft lips, eyelashes fluttering and glistening with tears. Warm sunlight filtering through the strands of her eyelashes, making the redness around her eyes more prominent.
Dull [e/c] eyes blankly staring at the two—her husband and a different woman.
Despite its dullness, her eyes were filled with anguish.
Tired, dull, and swollen.
No longer bright, hopeful, and happy. It's now filled with sorrow, and unimaginable heartache. Something an angel like her shouldn't feel. Yet, Lucifer Morningstar made that possible.
[Y/n] watches as her husband caresses Lilith's face, so affectionately.
Something she didn't experience from him lately.
“You're so beautiful.”
She heard him mutter to Lilith with a voice that carried so much emotion, it was enough to shatter her heart to tiny million pieces.
Finally gathering enough strength, she finally released herself from where she stood. Finally allowing herself to move, flying away swiftly and discreetly.
A single feather was what was left of where she once stood.
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She arrived at her shared home with Lucifer, quickly locking herself inside their bedroom.
Her body slouches against the door as she slowly slides down to the floor.
Painful sobs left her lips, shoulders shaking as she buried her face into her hands.
‘No, no, no, no, no... I must be seeing things... Lucifer can't just fall in love with someone that easy...’ she laughs to herself, voice cracking and trembling as she did so.
Shaking her head as she desperately tries to make herself believe her own words.
“This must be a misunderstanding, that's right... I'll ask him when... When he comes back...”
She says to herself, voice lowering to almost a whisper.
‘That is... If he comes home...’
She thought sadly, supporting her shoulder on to her knees, burying her face into her arms. Strands of her hair falling off to the side of her face,  framing the heartbreaking picture of the face that belongs to a heartbroken angel.
‘He can't just... Leave me like that... He can't just break our vows.’
She thought to herself, her hands rubbing her sides for comfort.
She only has herself to comfort herself, her husband isn't here after all.
“When he comes back, the two of us will have a proper and mature conversation... I hope.” she says to herself weakly, picking herself up from the floor. Knees tremble from the weight of her emotions, chest filled with pain and heartache. She can barely breathe, she wonders if she was still breathing.
She felt like a walking corpse.
Wiping her eyes with the sleeves of her dress, the soft material of her dress providing comfort to her swollen and aching eyes.
She dragged herself across the room, finally approaching the full length mirror just by their closet.
She can see how much of a mess she is. Eye bags underneath her eyes, tear streaks evident on her cheeks, her hair a mess. Pale skin and chapped lips from severe dehydration from how much she cried.
‘Is that me...?’ She asked herself, finally processing what she's seeing, finally coming to the realization that the figure in the mirror is her own reflection.
She can barely recognize herself, she doesn't look like that. She doesn't remember looking so tired and so... Sad and pathetic.
‘This wouldn't do, I don't want Lucifer to see me like this..’ she thought to herself sadly, the face of Lilith flashing in her mind.
Lilith, the first ever human woman. Of course, someone as beautiful as her would be someone Lucifer would fancy.
[Y/n] couldn't help but compare herself to the woman. Lilith has bright and blemish pale skin, hers were a sickly kind of pale.
Lilith has bright and hopeful eyes, hers are dull and sad.
Lilith has a beautiful and blemish free face, hers are tired and dark bags are underneath her eyes.
[Y/n] shakes her head, getting rid of the negative thoughts that filled her mind.
“Stop that, Lucifer loved you just the way you are.” she says to herself, yet doubt was evident in her voice.
‘Loved. That's right, he probably doesn't love me anymore.’
She shakes her head once more, ‘Stop that, he hasn't told us that yet... So I shouldn't say something like that...’
‘I'll just clean myself first, make myself presentable. In case he ever comes home.’
She says to herself, dragging herself to the bathroom to freshen up.
He never came home that day.
She lies on their shared bed, coming to that realization as the clock finally hit one in the morning. The bed was cold and lonely, the warmth that was usually beside her isn't present.
Closing her eyes, allowing the tears to glide down her pale cheeks, the tears staining the pillowcase of her pillow.
Past memories flash on her mind, memories of where Lucifer and her were still happy and in love.
“You are my best friend, the love of my life... I am so lucky to be called yours.” Lucifer says to her, kissing her forehead.
They were still teens in love, young and stupid but in love.
“You are so cheesy, stop saying cheesy things you're making me flustered.” she giggles as he twirls her around, bits of the clouds around them fluttering due to their movements.
Lucifer giggles, dipping her effortlessly and presses his forehead against his, “But it's my job to make you flustered, darling.”
She giggles, pink dusting her cheeks, “I love you, Lucifer.”
“I love you too, darling.”
She cried herself to sleep that night.
She sat on the couch of their living room, the early sunlight filtering through the large windows of their home, giving their home some warmth. The warmth makes her forget the coldness of her skin and the numbness of her heart.
Her head whipped to the sound of the door being opened, lo and behold, her husband finally came home.
Her eyebrows furrowed, eye twitching. She was aching to snap at him but she took a deep breath and calmed herself down.
“Lucifer, where have you been?” she asked softly, voice cracking and trembling in each syllable.
Lucifer flinches, jumping slightly from surprise. He was surprised to hear his wife's voice. He didn't expect her to be awake so early in the morning.
He gave her a nervous smile, “Darling, why are you awake so early?” he asked, [Y/n] just continuously tapped her feet against the marble tiles.
“Enough of that, I know you have been spending time with that human.” she says softly and Lucifer's eyes widened, avoiding his wife's eyes because of guilt.
“It's part of my job, love—”
“Stop lying to me, Lucifer Morningstar.” she snaps, eyes glaring at him, “I didn't know telling her that she's beautiful is part of the job? Might I also include... Caressing her face? Was that part of the job? Tell me, Lucifer...”
“Are you tired of me...?” she asked softly, and Lucifer's eyes saddened.
“No, no, no... I can never be tired of you...” he says softly, he's unsure if he's lying to himself or not. But he desperately tries to believe that he's not tired of her. Yes, he still loves her... Right?
He doesn't know the answer to that.
“Then why...?! Why are you spending the majority of your time with her?!” she screamed, her voice filled with anguish as she grips her hair. She swore she ripped some strands but she's too much in pain to care.
Lucifer's eyes widened, surprised by her outburst.
“Because I'm trying to make her feel better because Adam hasn't been good to her and I hope you can find it in your heart to care for her just a little.” he says softly, remembering the things Lilith told him, how Adam was mean to her.
[Y/n]'s eye twitch, the nerve. Why would she care about her?
“Why would I care about her?!” she asked angrily, and Lucifer frowned, “Because I care about her.” he says honestly, annoyance evident in his voice.
“Morning, noon, and night I care about her, yet you cannot spare a single sympathy for her.”
[Y/n] was taken aback, the first time sensing such hostility from him. Her husband defending another woman when all she ever asked from him is his time, some time for her.
“I'm just asking why you're spending so much time with her! I am your wife, Lucifer... I need you too!” She exclaimed, her voice cracking in anguish, “You're barely home anymore and it's getting unbearably lonely in our house, I missed you so, so much... Please.. I need you.”
“For heaven's sake, [Y/n]... Lilith just existed and she's scared and confused and Adam is also not treating her right! She needs someone.” He sighs, blue eyes looking at tired [e/c] ones, he would've asked for her forgiveness for his tone, but he was blind with the sense of duty towards Lilith. He couldn't think straight. Neither of them can.
“So stop being selfish, I'll come back when you have cleared your head, okay...?” he says softly yet a tinge of sharpness in his voice, turning around to leave, his heels clicking against the marbled tiles in each step he took.
The sound of the door clicking as he closed it brought her back to reality.
Her legs gave out as she fell into the cold hard marble floor, kneeling like heaven's first ever sinner. Her sin? Falling in love with heaven's most beautiful angel.
Blinking, she tries to process what just happened.
She and Lucifer just had their very first fight, and she doesn't know how to process it.
‘Azrael was right, I really don't know him at all.’
She thought to herself sadly, wiping her tears with her wrist before a broken sob escaped her lips once more.
She was left alone crying to herself in an empty, cold, and lonely house.
Days passed by, both Lucifer and [Y/n] were ignoring each other, unsure how to approach the other.
[Y/n] remained unmoving in their bed, all alone and cold. It's been so long since she last took care of herself.
“I feel so tired and weak... Heaven's... I feel like I'm about to pass out.” she murmured weakly, turning around to look at the empty spot of her shared bed with Lucifer, to see the said man to be nowhere in sight. He hasn't been home for a few days now.
‘I am so tired... Maybe I should rest for a bit...’ she thought, her eyesight blurring from the lack of sleep, she kept waiting for Lucifer's return but the man was nowhere in sight.
She sighs sadly, her eyes drooping without notice.
She passed out.
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She doesn't know how long she was asleep but the moment she woke up she was in Azrael's house, the man told her that she was asleep for days.
And also told her about the fall of both Lucifer and Lilith.
She still couldn't wrap her head around it, refusing to believe it.
Azrael sighs, taking a seat at the edge of the bed of where she was lying down.
“It's true, he and Lilith gave the apple to Eve... I'm afraid work is going to get much harder now that evil exists.” he spoke softly, eyes saddened as he looked at the downcast female.
He's wondering if this is the right time to tell her...
“And another thing... [Y/n]...?” he calls out softly to her, she looks at him with not a single light on her eyes.
“What is it...?”
“You're pregnant.” he says softly, [y/n]'s eyes widened.
“What...?”
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[Y/n] gasped loudly as she sat up on the bed, her head whipping around to look at her surroundings.
She's back in her room, weren't she in hell before?
Her breathing was uneven, placing a hand over her chest to calm her fast beating heart.
‘Why now...? Why did the memory have to come back now...?’
Tears were cascading down her cheeks, pitiful sobs leaving her lips.
“Mom...?” a soft male voice calls out, the door to the room opening, the head of Xavier peeking through the small opening.
The boy's eyes widened when he saw his mother crying on her bed.
“MOM...?! ARE YOU ALRIGHT?! ARE YOU HURT SOMEWHERE?!” he asked, immediately rushing to his mother's side, kneeling beside the bed.
[Y/n] shakes her head slowly, “I'm alright, I just got a bad dream...” she admitted softly, small hiccups leaving her lips.
Xavier's [e/c] eyes softened, grabbing a clean handkerchief from his breast pocket that he hasn't used yet, using it to wipe his mother's tears away.
“Do you wanna talk about it...?” he asked softly, his hands gently dabbing the soft cloth on [y/n]'s face, making sure to dry her tear stricken face.
“A little bit...” she says softly, smiling gently towards her son. Her eyes saddened even more, Xavier really looked like Lucifer.
“That's alright, don't pressure yourself mom.” Xavier spoke softly, standing up so he could sit at the side of the bed, leaning down to give a kiss on his mother's forehead.
She nodded and took a deep breath, “I dreamt... About your father.” she says softly and avoids her son's eyes.
Xavier's eyes widened, his shoulders dropping but decided not to speak and allowed his mother to talk.
“I dreamt of the past, how happy me and him were used to and now... I don't even know anymore.” she laughs bitterly.
Xavier's hand clenched slightly before relaxing, “It's not your fault mom...”
“I know.”
Xavier sighs softly, “Mom...?” he calls out softly to her, [Y/n] hummed.
“I think we need to talk about him now, it's a long overdue topic.” he says softly to her and she flinches but sighs.
He's right, she's been avoiding this topic for so many eons. It's time to talk about it.
She sighs softly, “You're right... I think we should.” and Xavier smiled, proud of her. He always has been.
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[Y/n] remained seated on her bed, thumbs playing with each other. Xavier has already left to do his usual routine around the house.
Their conversation about Lucifer has already ended, she told him everything about what happened. Told him why she loves him so much and what he did to hurt her.
She told him how she and Lucifer were together for how many years before marrying each other, she told him the things that he did that made her love him.
And she just can't let go of her feelings for someone that she loved for so many eons. It's not that easy.
Even after all these years, she can't forget.
[Y/n] sighs softly, her hair cascading down to her face, framing the shape of her face perfectly. She turned her head to the side to look at the window, she could see the large backyard forest-like garden.
Knock, knock, knock.
Her head whipped in the direction of the knock, she turned to look at the door to see Michael standing and leaning against the door frame lazily.
Her eyes widened ever so slightly, “Michael... What are you doing here??” she asked softly and Michael sighed as he entered the room and closed the door behind him.
“I came as I heard what happened, are you alright?” he asked worriedly, taking a seat at the edge of the bed. [Y/n] smiled and nodded, “Yes,I feel slightly a lot better now.”
Michael smiled though, his eyes still held a tinge of worry in them. He sighs, “[Y/n]... Do you want to stop this mission and let someone else do it?” he asked her softly and [Y/n]'s eyes widened.
“I am perfectly capable of doing this, Michael... Don't worry too much about me.” she says softly and Michael sighs once more.
“I'm just worried for you, everyone is.” he says sternly and [Y/n] frowns, “I know but I can assure you that I'm fine with doing this...”
Michael sighs once more, clearly already used to her stubbornness.
“If you say so,” he says softly before looking back at her once more, “—but if it's suddenly too much for you, don't hesitate to tell me okay?” he says sternly to her.
[Y/n] giggles softly, a small smile on her face, “Yes,I'll keep that in mind.”
Michael smiled and gave her a single nod, “You better.”
Michael's eyes widened, snapping his fingers as he seems to remember something, [Y/n] tilted her head at him, confused.
“I just remembered, Gabriel said she was gonna visit later.” he says deadpanning and [Y/n]'s lips tightened into a flat line, she gave Michael a deadpan, “Yay... I can't wait.” she says unenthusiastically.
Michael laughed softly and ruffled her hair, “I'm sure it wouldn't be too bad.”
“She's gonna lecture me again about how men are shit.” she says deadpanning at him as she remembers the times Gabriel kept on lecturing her about how Lucifer was just a man.
“That is so real, love that for her.” Michael says, nodding.
“Michael, you're a man.” [Y/n] says with a small smile while shaking her head with her eyes closed.
“Am I?”
[Y/n] turned to look at Michael... Who's now a woman now. She deadpanned at him, “Really?” She asked sarcastically with a small smile, Michael laughed out loud. His laughs reverberated around the room.
“I think I look gorgeous as one.” he says sassily, flipping his long blond hair behind his back.
[Y/n] giggled and Michael smiled, proud to make her happy.
“You're so silly, try wearing a maid dress next time.” she suggested playfully at him, giving him a wink.
“Don't push your luck.” he says deadpanning at her and she just laughs, holding her hands up in defeat, “Okay, okay... I won't.” she says in-between giggles.
He smiled and ruffled her hair, “Alright, alright... You seem to be feeling much better now,” he says standing up, giving her a small smile, “—I'll head out first, I still have some work that are needed to be finished.” he says with a long sigh.
[Y/n] giggles, “Alright then... Don't push yourself too much okay?” she says softly, her eyes looking at Michael with worry.
“I won't.” he says and she deadpans at him, “I know you're lying.”
“Shush.”
“I'll see you later, [N/n].” he says with a smile, [Y/n] smiled at him, “I'll see you later, Michael.”
“It's Michelle.” he says sassily once more, flipping his long blond hair dramatically making [Y/n] cackle, “Right... Michelle.. lmao.. I'll see you later, Michelle.” she says in-between snickers.
“Laterz girlfriend~” Michael says sassily as he left, transforming back to his male form as he did so.
[Y/n] was left alone in her room, but this time... She was laughing thanks to Michael.
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© LXKE 2024; please do not steal, translate, or repost my works as your own.
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Feyd Fantasy Part 6
Label Mature 18+
Brazen Baron
Summary
Feyd Rautha has a massive coronation. Excitement fills the air as his people look forward to a better future for the planet improving beyond his uncles reign.
Feyd begins blurring all the lines of his Harkonnen heritage for you. Everything he has been raised to value crumbles when he’s in your presence. You give him everything he never knew he desired and his infatuation for you becomes even deeper. His Lord in waiting takes notice and fears for his sanity and rational thought.
Will his undying love for you make him a great ruler or a passive counterfeit?
⚠️ Hardcore Smut ⚠️
Semi public sex •coercion• Feyd Dom• female restrained for sex•clit play• resisting arousal•FeydSub• Feyd handcuffed for sex • Feyd collared for sex• Feyd crop whipped•multiple ejaculations•Feyd Bj •Feyd violent sex•Feyd forced to orgasm•multiple orgasms•multiple cream pies
Feyd Fantasy Series
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Part 1• Part 2• Part 3• Part 4• Part 5• Part 6•Part 7
✍🏼 Proofwriter @faegoddessog 🫦 Smut consultant @burnthheparaphilia 💗Affection consultant @magicovento
⏳ Extreme Dune Inaccuracies ⌛️ 💝Not for my softies (mentions of violence)
Inspo: ⚔️Multiple anonymous requests combined ⚔️ -Sex against a window -Sex in the throne room -Dom Feyd -Sub Feyd -Feyd wearing a collar -Feyd being handcuffed for sex -Feyd being whipped(with a crop!) -Semi public sex -Feyd graphic BJ -Feyd willing to give up his kingdom for you -Feyd gives up his kink (what?!)
(These requests are 🥵 🔥 )
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Brazen Baron
It is the early morning of Feyd’s coronation. The military begin to fill the Fortress courtyard and allow in the people of Geidi Prime. Feyd feels the new emotion he’s come to favor, he feels elation as he opens his eyes. He can hear the chants of his name from the courtyard fortress just beneath his balcony. He trails his fingertips down your spine until he awakens you.
“Come bathe with me,” he says as you open your eyes.
You smile at him and stretch becoming more alert. You hear the chanting of his name from the courtyard below and quickly sit up “The crowd is cheering for your coronation!” You exclaim, he nods at you with a knowing smile.
You both hasten to wash your faces and cleanse your mouths before entering the decontamination chamber. He hugs you facing him as you stand together in the glowing green circle on the floor. It scans both of your bodies and a ring descends from above surrounding you both.
Starting at your feet it sprays rows of water and antimicrobial soap combined all the way to your neck stopping at Feyds shoulders. You both laugh at the height difference. He lathers the soap on his bare shoulders before taking his soapy hands and playfully pulling your face to kiss him.
His lips are so plush and soft you let him take over. He kisses you sensually as the ring sprays water around you both rinsing all of the soap from your bodies. When the chamber fills with hot air drying you off Feyd finally breaks the kiss.
He drops to his knees in worship of you. Holding your hips firm he presses his lips to your soft skin. He trails hot kisses from your navel all the way down to your pussy.
He is interrupted by a sudden sharp knock at his door. Feyd quickly stands and gets two robes placing one on you and then himself. You remain by the bed as he answers.
It is Feyds Lord in Waiting with several servants.
“Honor to you on Coronation Day Baron Feyd Rautha,” he says bowing. ”Here are the trusted servants that will help with your preparations for today,” several servants enter and begin attending to you both without hesitation.
They take Feyd to one side of the room and bring you to the basin room closing the door. You see the seamstress among the group holding a beautiful gown black gown. She presents it to you.
The dress is traditional Harkonnen black; floor length made of is a thin fabric covered in thousands of tiny black Giedi Prime crystals. It is one shouldered with a sheer cape and a slit. As you run the breathable fabric through your fingers you find the design fascinating.
“You will look marvelous in this today as you do in all of my creations.” She says pleasantly. The servants remove your robe at your shoulders stripping you bare, you cover yourself feeling immodest. The seamstress shoos them away and personally hands you your undergarments to put on for yourself.
The panties are a sheer black sheer shimmering fabric. They are so tiny when you pull them on. They expose your cheeks and you blush looking back in the mirror “Is this correct?” You ask the seamstress shyly.
“Ah yes, so the dreaded lines do not show yet you covered beneath, Baroness,” she says reassuringly.
The servants bring in a chair for you to sit. They begin tugging at your hair, slicking it back and pinning it with black Harkonnen treasury gemstones. Another servant begins preparing your face by applying pigmented colors to enhance your natural beauty. There is a knock at the door and a final servant brings you a plated meal to eat as the servants work around you.
After what seems like hours you are finally fitted into your dress. You turn and look in the mirror feeling so regal and confident. You smile, looking yourself over. The dark eye makeup and rouge lip enhancing your sultry, Harkonnen look. You nod feeling ready and they slide the doors open to the main chamber.
You see him first. Feyd is calm and collected wearing an all black royal leather coat over a high neck black top. His signet ring is on his pinky finger and the ascension stones of the Baron rest around his neck. He carry’s two weapons sheathed at his hip, a white short blade, and a black long sword. From your readings on his heritage you understand the black represents purity while the white represents poison.
They will present him with his Baron medallion on stage in-front of the populace, though he has already been instated to wear it. He finally looks over to you with a heavy blink of disbelief that makes you giggle.
You’ve actually never seen him so shocked about anything. A smile plays on his lips, knowing instantly that he has to have you in that dress. He is already calculating a way to be alone with you and have his way with your body before the ceremony even begins.
The Lord in Waiting claps his hands making the servants stop everything. “Lord Feyd Rautha shall we proceed to the Shrine room?“ he inquires.
Feyd nods to the Lord in Waiting and takes your arm exiting his chamber together. His advisors and page are waiting just outside to follow him in procession. You walk through the halls until you reach a set of grandiose stairs that lead to the top center front of the fortress. The highest tower, the Holy Shrine room.
Feyd releases your arm and eyes his page who immediately takes you to a separate area. Only men are permitted to enter the Shrine. The Page finds a bench for you to rest as you wait for Feyd to complete his ancestral duties.
Once they have ascended the stairs and enter the Holy Shrine, his twelve advisors gather around Feyd and kneel with their foreheads on the floor to him. The triangular room has two angled front walls completely made of glass which overlook the fortress courtyard far below.
The back wall is covered in shelves of relics and holy items. In the center of the room on a flat raised triangle platform is the sacred Harkonnen stone.
Centuries old, it is engraved with the first known instance of the Harkonnen crest. The name of every Baron and his reigning years are etched into its black reflective surface. The twelve advisors rise back to standing and leave his presence to allow him to speak with his ancestors.
Feyd is immediately drawn to the stone. Compelled to kneel down in front of it, his curiosity takes hold as he looks over all of the names etched into its jagged peaks. He passes over his uncle Vladimirs before finding his grandfather’s, Dmitri Harkonnen. He touches the stone tracing his finger along the letters of his name.
As if by force Feyd’s mind settles on a district memory he had locked away. It floods his mind entirely.
His brother Rabban returned to their home planet of Lankerville as a young man in command of Harkonnen troops. Rabban was under complete control of his uncle the Baron Vladimir by this time. He was there to prove his undying loyalty.
Their father was the governor of the planet and had not paid its taxes, instead defying the Baron and using the money to help the poor. When their father tried to explain the reasoning for his actions, Rabban flew into a blind rage over his disobedience to the Baron and strangled their own father, Abulard Rabban, to death.
Feyd releases his finger from the stone feeling the course of evil run through his body. He realizes his entire family is corrupt and his very blood has been poisoned with murder and greed for centuries. Including his own unspeakable atrocities.
He unsheathes his swords crossing them in an X. With his arms out stretched he bows his head and salutes them in the way of the sun and the old manner. He replaces them back into their holsters and rises up understanding what he is and what he has descended from.
Sacred
You look up when Feyds twelve advisors and his Lord in Waiting walk past you to take their places at the ceremony in the courtyard. They eye you warily. Feyd Rautha would not dare bring a female into the Holy Shrine. Though they see you have captivated him they believe he would never bring such terrible omen over his reign as Baron.
Feyd steps out of the Shrine and calls down to his Page, “Bring her to me,” he commands. The Pages eyes widen in shock, knowing what Feyd is asking, but does as he’s told. He finds you where he left you seated. “My Lord Feyd Rautha requests your presence at this time,” he says in fear.
You walk down the corridor to the stairs. Feyd steps down to collect you, helping you advance each step until you reach the top. He opens the shrine doors and you enter together as he seals it shut. His Page falls to the floor chanting forgiveness over his Barons sacrilege.
The Shrine is beautiful inside the walls and floors are completely black, reflective and slick like oil. A large jagged black stone etched in names rests on a white raised triangular shaped platform in the center of the room.
As you look more intently at the stone an uneasiness forms in your mind and you know you should not be in this place. You turn to Feyd to leave but he is standing in front of several skulls lined up in a showcase. He stares at them with a fierce intensity
He finally looks to you, gesturing you to come. As you approach him you glance over all the rows of ancient stones, knives, relics, gemstones and artifacts displayed in the shelving of the hallowed walls.
When you are beside him he points to a skull “The remnants of Leto Atreides, Duke of the greatest enemy of the Harkonnens for centuries. I thought I would feel it a great honor to see this and the skull of his son Paul missing beside it, but instead I feel nothing. The hatred is long gone once they are vanquished. I see now that only bones are what remain.”
You have no word for him as you watch how he gazes into the empty eye sockets of what once was the Atreides Duke. The growing chants of the large crowd below finally reach the shrine room drawing you both to the front glass windows. As you peer down, you realize just how high up you are.
There are rows and rows, of thousands of soldiers surrounding a square stage with the Harkonnen crest.
Feyd seeing the anxiety forming on your face removes his blade scabbard placing it on an ottoman. He wraps his arms around your waist from behind. You place your hands on his as he presses his face to yours. He calms your rising nerves caressing your hands with his thumbs as you stare into a crowd so large.
He finds something familiar to distract you and points.
“Look there are my advisors and the Lord in Waiting and look at Rabban!” He laughs seeing his brothers face full of pride at the base of the stage waiting for him.
He presses a kiss to your temple seeing a smile form across your lips. You are everything to him he would forgo all of this if you asked him to. Instead you encourage his lust for power at every instance.
“Feyd look there at the fortress gates, see how your people call for you.” He looks into the large crowd of people being held back by rows of guards. They chant and scream for him. You look over your shoulder at him. “Are you nervous?” You ask, feeling the weight second hand.
He presses a kiss to your cheek. “I was raised to do this I feel nothing but honor.” His hands trail your bodice as an idea returns to his mind. He’s going to fuck you, here, in the shrine room over looking everyone gathered for his coronation.
You start to feel his kisses lower onto your neck, gently at first until he begins licking and sucking against your throat raising love marks.
He can’t get enough of you. Even now in this, the Holiest Shrine of his ancestors. He wants to defile you in every way. He desires you more than anything his planet has to offer. You feel his lips form a wicked grin against your neck.
He quickly hoists your gown up exposing your lower half and presses your chest to the glass. His right hand moves to your core pressing his fingers onto your clothed clit.
You gasp at the feeling and try to remove his hand. The sacrilege of having sex in a shrine room above hundreds of thousands terrifies you.
Feyd grabs both of your wrists pinning them behind your back preventing you from taking away his pleasure.
He resumes rubbing deeply against the fabric covering your pussy. "Feyd, there are thousands of people below, someone will see us! This room is scared you will be committing sacrilege!" You pant, becoming weak with anxiety trying to make him rationalize.
You pull your wrists in his grip trying to break free but it is impossible. He is twice as strong and easily keeps your hands pinned to your back. Your struggling excites him and you feel his erect cock press against the back of your bare thigh. You know he is going to overtake you and have his way.
He lowly rasps in your ear "Don't worry they can't see us.....but I wouldn't mind fucking you infront of thousands just so everyone knows who you belong to as you make those pretty sounds for me.” His words make you weak.
He pulls your panties to the side that cling because you are so wet. He pushes his two fingers deeply into you, all the way to his knuckles, you gasp in pleasure.
He begins pulling them in and out against your tight walls massaging you internally. The exact sounds that he likes, that drive him feral, fall from your lips. It makes his cock twitch in anticipation.
“Just like that Baroness, keep making those pretty sounds for me,“ he rasps as he kisses up your neck with wild fervor. He fingers you faster and harder until your moans are unending. His knuckles wetly smack against your folds as you come undone from pure anxiety and arousal. You orgasm on his fingers soaking through your panties and trembling as you come down from the euphoric release.
You feel the way he still grips your wrists tightly in his strong hand. He has you trapped. He hasn’t yet desecrated you in the Holy Shrine room, there is still time to stop him.
He slips his fingers from your entrance and you twist your wrists hard to escape. He only holds a tighter grip and presses your chest back to the glass. He takes a step back and sucks your arousal from his fingers. “Feyd please,” you beg, “I have read the books on your ancient ways, what we are doing is a bad omen, please.”
The sound of your thin panties being ripped from your body renders you senseless. You are like a piece of porcelain to him. He could easily break you if he wanted, tear you into pieces while he fucks you in this shrine, but he won't. He loves you, even if he doesn't show it with words but proves it with actions.
He presses his fingers into your wet folds and you squirm as he starts to rub his fingers through them. He wants to make you impossibly wetter, preparing you for his cock. Your resolve grows weaker when he reaches between your legs and swirls his fingertips around your now swollen clit. Your mind goes empty, unable to form a thought. He takes control and you give in to him completely.
Feyd feels you stop resisting and accept his touch. He savors the fact he’s dominated you into submission. Now he wants to taunt you into an orgasm and completely break your mind to his will. “You are like a pleasure slave Baroness letting me fuck you against a window in the Holy Shrine.” He pinches your clit as punishment making you moan as you arch your back.
He smiles as he unclasps and frees his pale cock.
He slips his pink, throbbing tip up and down through your soaked folds, coating it in your arousal to ease his penetration. “You are practically dripping Baroness. Who knew you were such a concubine to please my cock” he says mockingly. You let out a small whimper of shame.
He gets aroused with how easily he can break you with just his words, your body is primed for him. He holds you steady with his free hand on your waist and thrusts into you burying deep all the way until his hips press your thighs. You moan loudly from the penetration of his cock and he begins to fuck you hard against the glass window.
He pulls your wrists back towards him and the leverage allows him to plow even deeper. You look out of the window into the dizzying crowd your moans unending as he thrusts in and out of you as your vision goes fuzzy. You are going into shock mentally and physically. Feyd is so insatiable for you he no longer has rational thought. You don’t understand why he has to have sex here of all places, he is cursing himself.
He thrusts into you feeling limitless. He has defiled you on the sacred meeting hall table, in the pools of purity, and now the Holiest Shrine. He is elated, fucking into you with wild abandon. His hips clapping into you until they stutter.
He cums powerfully, thrusting harder until the heat of his seed fills your core and you both moan. He frees your hands to take hold of your waist pulling his hips back until his heavy cock slips out of you. He is elated and gasping as he puts his cock away with a smile.
You slide your dress down your hips and collect your panties as he fastens his sword scabbard onto his trim waist. He turns you to him and pulls you close. His breathing is labored as he kisses you.
He extends his hand for the panties you hold in yours “Give them to me I want them during the ceremony” he demands. You shyly hand them to him smiling in amusement as he tucks them in his inner breast pocket.
The sound of the crowd is growing even louder. “Come” he says excitedly taking your hand he knows it is time for him to begin the ceremony
The Lord in waiting returns to collect Feyd, he is taking longer than expected and the crowd is at a fever pitch. He sees you with Feyd who is smiling. Feyd plants a kiss on your lips as you walk away together from the stairs at the base of the shrine.
“What have you done!” The Lord in Waiting yells and falls to his knees saluting in the way of the old mannor. He is shocked beyond belief knowing Feyd Rautha has already allowed you into the Holy Shrine.
The Lord in Waiting feels the rising bitterness of disappointment putting his faith in what he thought was such a promising young Baron. He rises as Feyd Rautha approaches with you holding his arm. “My Baron! Do you not realize the grave mistake you have just made? And on your coronation day! A female in the shrine room!….” His disgust and loathing apparent as he says the word ‘female.”’staring you down. He sees his Barons lust for you has completely contaminated his mind.
Feyd takes his attention back. “Get to the stage and present the Baron Medallion. My bloodline is already cursed enough it can not be made worse.” He snaps.
The Lord in waiting is stunned by his Baron’s callous insolence. One moment rallying his council with honor and tradition the next defiling their very belief system. He realizes Feyd Rautha cares for his own interests above all.
The Lord in Waiting watches as you pass him with Feyd. Your garments swish as you walk seductively, holding Feyd’s arm. Your chin is lifted in complete confidence. He understands then that Feyd Rautha never broke you, but that it is the other way around. The late Baron Vladimir was right all along you are corrupting Feyd Rautha to his very core.
He can tell no one of this matter until they replace him. Even then it will be sealed by his lips. No one can know that a female holds any sort of power over a ruling Harkonnen.
Baron Feyd Rauthas Coronation
Feyd Rautha walks the long procession to the center stage lined by rows and rows of his massive army. The crowd cheers in jubilation as he nears the platform. Feyds hands are clasped behind his back. He nods to his brother, Rabban, and ascends to the podium.
The crowd erupts into raucous adulation at seeing their new, young and strong leader. Feyd stands center stage and unsheathes his sword, raising it to the air.
They all begin to chant his name in unison. The Lord in Waiting approaches Feyd with an advisor holding a black chest. Feyd sheaths his sword as the advisor hinges it open. Inside rests the silver Baron medallion bearing the Harkonnen crest.
The Lord in Waiting, unable to meet his new Baron’s strong gaze, brings the medallion to Feyd Rautha’s chest, pinning it in place. He steps back as he and the advisors bow in reverence. All of the soldiers cross their hands over their chests in an X then raise them above their heads in a salute. They pledge their undying loyalty to their new Baron. Fireworks begin erupting across the sky all over the capital as the crowd erupts into wild cheers.
You watch him from afar in adulation. Females are not allowed anywhere near the coronation space. You view his ceremony from a court balcony using binoculars. You sit with the wives of other delegates and interplanetary leaders.
As you see all of the power he commands you cannot help but be aroused by him. Knowing your panties are tucked in his breast pocket because he wanted you on that stage makes you bite your lip trying to contain your lust. You desire him greatly.
You cannot wait to spoil him with the depravity he craves tonight. You wonder if all men of power have this strange complex. God, commanding and powerful on the outside, submissive to be tortured on the inside.
Feyd yearns to be hurt; he loves pain. Tonight you want to hear him beg for mercy. You want to hear him say the words to make the pain stop as he yells ‘red door’ in his greatest moment of agony.
Bene Gesserit
You awaken in the morning and stretch as the room fills with early light. Feyd’s celebration lasted well into the night with lively entertainment and festivities. Your clothing is strewn across the room; wrist restraints are at the foot of the bed.
You look over to Feyd and see he’s still wearing a leather collar with a leash. You smile as you watch him peacefully sleeping. He is always up before you which means you successfully exhausted him.
Wearing the collar makes him look sexually submissive. As he swallows his throat presses against the leather strap, it must be uncomfortable.
You straddle his abs and begin to release the buckle to free his neck. He grabs your wrist with his eyes closed “leave it on” he commands. You just pinch his chin and release the buckle freeing him of the restraint.
You climb off of him to begin getting dressed. “Where are you going?” he reaches his hand to pull you back into bed but you elude him. He sits up and throws back the sheet exposing his injured thighs as he rests on the edge of the bed.
It makes your stomach pull tight in regret as you kneel down and soothe his wounds. You plant a kiss next to each one. His marks are red with dried blood.
You remember exactly how he was injured:
During the coronation party you asked him back to his chambers. You had a naughty look in your eye that he couldn’t resist. He eagerly followed you, leaving his own celebration as Baron.
As soon as you entered his chamber, he tried to claim you. But you pushed him back and commanded him to strip. When he was naked you picked up a leather braided riding crop from the sex toy table. You commanded him to sit pointing the crop to a chair placed at the foot of the bed.
He rested back against the chair as he stared at you spreading his legs wide to tantalize you with his free standing cock. Your eyes were transfixed until you remembered your task. You collected the interlocking links and approached him. “Restrain yourself. I don’t trust you know how to behave, Feyd Rautha” you commanded him with a smile.
He smiled back at you with a mischievous glint in his eyes. You quickly handed him the interlocking links, keeping your distance so he couldn’t overpower you. He obediently cuffed his hands behind his back.
You stripped bare and his eyes lidded in attraction for you. As you came to stand between his parted legs you kneeled down and began to suck his cock. He gasped as you instantly satisfied his desire and enjoyed being restrained as you pleased him.
You released his cock from your mouth before he came. You stood and leaned in to kiss him and he tasted himself on your tongue. You leaned up with your breasts directly in his face. He tried to reach and lick your nipple into his mouth, but you took a step back.
You chastised him for misbehaving and he grinned. “I will collar you now because you are so unwilling to behave, Feyd,” you said with a mocked angry tone. His eyes tried to follow your movements as you walked past him to his kink closet, You picked out the largest of four collars.
You straddled his lap trapping his cock between your navals and placed the collar on him. He groaned when you pulled the leather tight. It suited him well.
As you stepped back from him with the leash in your hand he sexily glared up at you. While wearing the collar with his hands restrained he was unable to overtake you. But his lustful thoughts of the ways he wanted destroy you radiated from his eyes. Your arousal increased and you become wetter.
The urge to ride him then almost over took your mind. But instead you calmed your lust and tortured him first, knowing what he liked. You made him try and lick your nipple in front of his face again, this time pulling the leash taunt choking him back as he tried.
Each time he failed you hurled insults at him. “How can a man so powerful be so weak,” was the one that softened the ferocity in his eyes.
Once you broke him down mentally you began the physical. You lightly snapped the riding crop against his most vulnerable spots. Between his shoulder blades, across his abs, but the thighs were his favorite. That elicited the most depraved groans from his throat.
You repeatedly snapped the riding crop to either side of his inner thighs until they were blistering red. “More!” he growled at you. He yearned to be injured. But seeing his thighs begin to bleed you refused.
You had even more torture in store but a spark of sadness and even pity welled up in you. He was so sexually depraved and you didn’t have the will to hurt him any more. He was just too beautiful to mutilate any further. You stood between his parted legs as he stared up at you with his striking blue eyes pleading for more.
You caressed his temple, probing to see if instead of calming energy you could use your own prana nervature to induce pain without harming his perfect body. You wanted to give him what he desired even if it meant excruciating agony.
As you sent the energy into his mind he winced and then his face slowly changed from discomfort to torment. His brows knitted as his jaw slacked. All the muscles began to show prominently across his body as he tried to adjust from the pain.
His cock became so hard the tip turned from pink to red. His breaths began shuddering and his body tensed as if he were having an orgasm. When you increased the pain even more he began leaking precum. He deeply groaned though his clenched teeth in pleasure.
You couldn’t help yourself as you climbed on his lap and impaled yourself down on his painfully hard cock. You kept your fingertips pressed to his temple and used him mercilessly for your own pleasure, riding his cock while delving out the worst pain imaginable into his mind. He came twice, one ejaculation right after the other. “You’re … a ….Bene Gesserit!“ he finally said through clenched teeth as he struggled.
He gasped as you intensified his pain even more. He came a third time, but had little semen left to give as you orgasmed.
He was trembling and his eyes were welling with tears. He gritted his teeth until they clicked. He was withstanding pain that was beyond human capacity to endure.
“Tell me you’ve had enough Feyd.” you whispered against his ear.
You knew it was time to withdraw, but he wouldn’t say the words. You increased the intensity of the pain to its strongest.
His mouth fell open as he strained, seemingly unable to breathe. He gasped as if he couldn’t enough get air into his lungs.
He was struggling almost unable to even say the words as he used the last of his strength to yell “Red….Door!” to make it all stop.
You released him from the pain instantly and he fell forward gasping against your chest as his warm tears leaked on your breast.
He was shuddering as he looked up to you with his wrecked out eyes and tear streaked face. He tried to say words but he couldn’t form a single one. You rendered him dumb from the intensity of so much pain. He must’ve felt like he met his death.
With his energy fading and his inability to speak, he rested his head back to your chest. His eyes were closing in exhaustion having had his deepest yearning fulfilled. When you caressed his face, he had recoiled in fear before allowing your soothing touch. You smiled at him then nothing would ever compare.
Now, he looks at you with worshipful eyes, knowing in an instant you can inflict upon him such painful agony. You stand after checking his wounds and he quickly pulls you to him as he sits on the edge of the bed.
He plants kisses between your breasts at your heart, inhaling your scent rubbing his face against you.
He is obsessed, craving anything you will give him. He trails his hands down your curves. He knows he should get dressed but he can’t break himself away from you.
There is a sudden knock at the door and it fills him with rage to be so interrupted. He has so many unanswered questions for you. Questions that are only second to the desire to bed you before he leaves.
“Feyd I will be here later, you are Baron now your people need you,” you smile at his neediness and caress your hand over his head into his neck.
He feels the honor of now ruling several planets, but you are his main desire. He closes his eyes as he plants more kisses between your breasts with every intention to fulfill his need.
His page, relays the message through the door “m’Lord, the spice harvesters are being destroyed in an orchestrated attack on Arrakis. You are needed to address these urgent matters in the strategy hall at once.”
You turn from Feyd as he growls. You quickly get dressed, sensing he will bed you if you stay close to him in this confined space any longer. The hunger in his hypnotic blue eyes is too desperate. You leave his chambers without even saying goodbye. He is psychotic and sexually vulnerable, you need him to focus and be a great leader for the future heir you carry in your womb.
War on Arrakis
After several hours Feyd’s page finally locates you in the medical wing. He comes scrambling in as you are speaking with your Doulah. “M’lady the Baron requests your presence in the throne room at once,” he says out of breath. He had been searching everywhere for you in the fortress to appease his angered Baron.
Feyd Rautha had been crazed in the strategy hall during the morning meeting. With his advisors and military strategists present he flew into a rage. He received confirmation from his brother back on Arrakis there was indeed a rebel leader named Muad’Dib, with an enormous army of Fremen hiding in the desert.
Rabban, wanting to impress his brother as the new Baron trailed the Fremen who had destroyed the spice harvesters. His ornithopter was loaded with several soldiers, as they tracked the Fremen into the nearest rock formation.
As he landed, a small sand storm had begun. He exited the craft with his men and they were ambushed in the low visibility. The Fremen attacked the Harkonnen soldiers with inherent skill for desert combat.
Rabban locked eyes with their leader and knew him to be this Mua’dib as his men followed at a pace behind him. Fear struck him seeing all his men had already been defeated.
Rabban fled back to the ornithopter and a lone Fremen jumped in after him. He was able to dispatch the Fremen, who was hurled from the ornithopter falling to his death. Rabban escaped, nearly losing his life.
Feyd immediately ordered an annihilation raid on Arrakis to bomb its inhabitants into the ground. He wanted the skull of Muad’Dib as a trophy in his shrine. He made arrangements for interspace travel with you and his militia to Arrakis the following day. He planned to rid the planet of the insurgents for good. Finally increasing the Harkonnen spice profits exponentially.
The Throne Room
You are unaware of Feyds mental state but can sense from his page that he is angry. When you arrive at the throne room, you stare in awe at the large golden doors. A mural of the history of Giedi Prime is engraved upon them.
The guards part the golden doors and you enter the cavernous room. It is bare of all decorations. Everything from the floor to the extremely high ceiling is matte black. Six enormous pillars line each side of the room showcasing the throne in the center with Feyd upon it. Several steps lead up to his platform.
He is stoic and regal in his new garments but his eyes are on fire for you. Once the doors are closed behind you he beckons you to come up to him.
You hold the hem of your gown and climb the steps stopping at the last one before you enter the sacred space of his ruling platform “Am I allowed to approach, Baron Feyd Rautha? “ You ask in a sweet tone as you bow.
“Come and kneel at my feet,” he commands. You approach slowly and kneel before him with your head lowered. His sexual energy already charges the space.
Your stomach pulls tight in anticipation of what he will do to you after the way you left his presence in the morning. His hand reaches for you and he softly touches under your chin, tilting your face up.
He is enamored when you look up to him, your face is so beautiful and kind. He summoned you to discuss your loyalty to the Bene Gesserit, but looking into your resolute eyes he fears your response.
He decides to use you for pleasure to ease his stress instead.
His hand slips behind your neck pulling you between his open thighs to his crotch. Your face flushes as heat radiates in your core from the close proximity. “Do you know how much I desired you this morning?” he asks, making you look up into his eyes, “how much I desire you even now?”
Just being in your presence he can no longer contain his urges. He takes your hands one at a time placing them on each of his thighs. “Open your mouth for your Baron” he commands and you obey his wishes.
He unclasps his pants, freeing his thick erect cock. It slaps against his covered abs before he holds the base steadying it straight. “I want you to hold my thighs and suck my cock until you can no longer breathe. Only when you squeeze my thighs will I release you to recover.” You slowly nod with your mouth open. He takes the back of your head and forces your mouth down his length.
He groans as his cock enters your mouth and fills all the way to your throat space. You can not reach his base and as you try your drool pools down his shaft.
He feels the saliva coating his cock and tilts his head back enjoying it. “You like the taste of my cock don’t you Baroness, wait until you drink my cum”, he says hand gripping your hair forcing you up and down on his erect length. Your mouth feels so good on him the room begins to fill with his breathier moans.
He releases your hair from his grasp, getting lost in the pleasure of your inherent skill. You continue to suck him, starting to move faster while the vibrations of your whimpers make his cock twitch.
"That's it don't stop" he rasps, grabbing hold of your hair again.
He forces your mouth up and down on his length as he thrusts his hips. You nearly gag and are tempted to beg for release until you hear his deep moans of pleasure that instantly soak your pussy. You keep your hands still and relax your throat to endure more for his pleasure.
You turn your gaze up to him, looking through your wet eyelashes, pleading for some kind of friction in your now aching core. You remove your hand from his thigh and begin to pleasure yourself.
His eyes open when he no longer feels the warmth there. He looks down and watches how you slowly move your hand between your legs, pleasing yourself as you moan and suck his cock. It nearly makes him ejaculate.
"I’m going to make you …-take all of my cock ….- down your throat when I cum” His raspy voice floods your ears while he makes the pace more violent.
Unable to breathe, you quickly bring your hand from your clit and start to squeeze his thighs.
The pain of you squeezing his injuries arouses him even more. He continues his pace until he feels your fists pounding against his thighs snapping him out of his pleasure.
He instantly releases you. As his cock glides out of your mouth it slaps against his covered abs. You pant, chest heaving to regain air quickly to your lungs.
You stare at his prominent wet cock, covered in your saliva. His tip has turned red, the veins throb visibly on his shaft and core pulses as your pupils expand in arousal . You must have him inside of you.
He leans back against his throne, breathing heavily and removes his shirt, tossing it aside. His body is covered in a light sheen, you watch the way the sweat trails from his neck onto his porcelain abs.
He regains control over his lungs and stands removing the remaining clothing from his lower half. He rests back on the throne completely naked with his cock standing erect. He pats his lap smiling beckoning you to come.
You remove your gown and slip out of your panties eagerly climbing on top of him. You place your knees on either side of his waist. He looks up at you enraptured finally able to reclaim you. His hands trail down to grip your waist. He pulls you forward and lowers you down on his cock. You both moan as he penetrates and settles you to the base.
He watches as you lean back and grab his sore thighs squeezing them and making him gasp as you ride him, your face is in pure bliss.
Feeling the mild pain you inflict squeezing his thighs as you ride him flashes his mind back to the previous night. His breathing increases remembering how, with just a touch, you can give him the most intense pain he will ever endure in his lifetime.
His hand is trembling in anticipation as he pulls your wrist up to press your finger tips against his temple.You sit up placing your other hand on his shoulder as you continue to ride him.
You transfer him a low level of pain, you don't want him to cum yet.
His stamina decreases as he rests back feeling the intense effects of his body adjusting to pleasure and pain simultaneously.
You moan as his cock swells even harder inside of you. He is motionless as you take over riding him. Your passion increasing as your eyes close using him to your satisfaction.
You release the pain from him overwhelmed with the way his cock pleasures your walls. You grab a hold of his shoulders and lean in to devour his mouth. He pulls you into an even deeper kiss with his hand holding the nape of your neck.
He regains the ability to work his cock and thrusts into you hitting the exact place inside of you that has you calling out his name each time.
He slows his pace to a stop and delays your orgasm. He has to know the truth “ Bene Gesserit or my Baroness” he ask’s breathlessly testing your loyalty to the order.
He has been warned of your kind by his uncle. ‘Sperm harvesting witches who infiltrate the great houses to deceive and twist fate for their own benefit.’
But as he gazes upon you with worshipful eyes he knows this can not be true. He has fallen madly for you.
You know the truth as you stare back into his hypnotic blue eyes. Though you were sent to secure his genetics and bind his mind you have already betrayed your sisterhood. You have fallen in love with him.
“I am your Baroness” you confess
Your answer satisfies him completely and he pulls you back to him in a passionate kiss
He begins to increase his pace as he holds you to him placing his hand on his throne for leverage. He works his cock with his hips and thighs to thrust in you with everything he has to give.
You ride him in rhythm until you are both moaning in tandem on the verge of orgasms. You lean forward and press your mouth on his with a kiss as you press your fingers on his temple and elicit his mind with agonizing pain. His abs tense and he lets out a sound of anguished pleasure as he instantly cums.
Arrakis
At day break you and Feyd load into a Harkonnen warship. Inside it is decorated luxuriously with every amenity possible. The long craft is like a palace in space. The interior designed with gold and black furnishings decorated throughout. The exterior is disguised to blend with the rest of the armada.
You are going to travel through space to his other planet Arrakis. Feyd has started a war there and vowed to completely annihilate his newfound enemies, the Fremen before they become too powerful.
You ascend from the capital of Giedi Prime looking out of the floor to ceiling windows as the gray planet gets smaller and smaller until the ship launches to a speed that the windows only show black. You are traveling within his armada of fifty warships.
Feyd kisses your hand and holds it with his as he rests back on the sofa. You are both relaxing in the ornate lounge room. He smiles at you he couldn’t bear to leave you on Geidi Prime. He’ll have trusted Harkonnen assassins protect you heavily at his Arrakeen palace. Your saftey with his unborn is paramount.
He can’t wait to see the destruction and chaos that his brother Rabban has already made in his wake. Feyd wants to wet his blades with blood in a battle. Slicing freemen limb from limb excites him.
He believes he has found a secret way to release his bloodlust seeing you only allow him to kill if it enhances his reign. He strokes your chin to look at him so he can gaze into your eyes. You plant as kiss on his lips and he smiles. He caresses his thumb along your jaw as he stares at your lips. He wants to fuck you in the master suite of the spacecraft.
A servant politely knocks before stepping into the lounge gently announcing breakfast will be served in the dining room. You will be traveling through trans light speed on the ship for a full day to reach Arrakis.
To be continued …
Up Next: Honor & Heir | Feyd Fantasy Part 7 Final
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Arrakis | Feyds War | Feyd as a Father | Finale
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leahswife · 2 days
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where do we stand
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summary: you're tired of aitana's mixed signals and someone on the spanish team loves to get you all flustered. aitana is definitely not jealous.
spoiler alert: that someone is none other than jenni hermoso.
a/n: more like fulfilling two fantasies in one
this national break had come in handy for you and lucy. england was set to play a few matches in spain, so you were able to sneak in a break between trainings to go see your club teammates and you managed to check in the same hotel as them for the time being. 
you were both getting antsy as the game was approaching its end and spain was in the lead by one goal. 
when the referee blows the final whistle, you exhale in relief and lucy stands up, cheering, quickly pulling you up to celebrate with her. 
it takes some time for the stadium to start clearing up, with both teams doing their laps around the pitch to thank the fans, but once it was empty enough you and lucy walked down to the field to congratulate your teammates.
you ran up to ona, the girl grabbing your waist so she could lift you up and down with excitement, "ayyy oni!!" you laughed at being manhandled, when you noticed aitana.
her smile was radiant as she was cheering with salma and mariona. you didn't know if you should approach her or not, your situation a bit complicated as of now. explaining it was no easy task either. 
you were shy around everyone when you first transferred to barça, although over time they managed to crack your walls and gain your trust. especially aitana, the girl getting closer and closer to you each day. you eventually became best friends, until one night aitana drunkenly confesses she wants to kiss you. so then, your friendship changes into a… situationship? the next day you talk about it, aitana doesn't know what she wants but doesn't want to lose you either. you go back to normal as if nothing happened. but something does happen. during movie night at mapi and ingrid's for team bonding, you and aitana are in the corner of the couch whispering to each other, in the dark, when the catalan tentatively kisses the corner of your mouth. when you drop her off at home later that same night, you kiss her. she brings you inside, which turns one kiss into multiple. what could be defined as innocent kisses in each other's houses eventually become not so innocent make out sessions behind closed closet doors at training. but you're not dating. aitana whispers into your secret kisses that she can't date, she doesn't have time, she needs to focus. so you wait, and wait, and wait. until she's pulling away again and national break comes and she barely messages you, apart from the friendly "good luck" message.
so now here you were, in close distance to her again. you were friends, right? so friends congratulate friends. that's what she wants, so that's what you'll give her.
you turn your attention back to ona and squeeze her shoulders, "best defender in the making! just you wait until you have to face our lessi russo." you tease her by patting her cheek. ona rolls her eyes with a smile, "voy a estar preparada, tonta. what did you think of the game?" she now asks both you and lucy, as the latter approached, having been talking to alexia. "ehh, más o menos." lucy answers, banter present in her voice. ona mocks her and you chuckle, leaving them to it as you walk over to aitana.
"nice goal, bonmatí." you lightly kicked her butt with your foot to get her attention. she turns to you and immediately launches herself into your arms with an infectious smile. it must have been the adrenaline of the win, you think, a bit surprised. nonetheless, you hold her in your arms. "i saw you in the stands." she affirms once she let go of the hug to look at you tenderly. "hm, i might have been your lucky charm then." you shrugged nonchalantly and whipped your hair over your shoulder. "sí, obvio." aitana went along with your joke, nodding with a fake serious expression. 
suddenly a body slammed into you both, one tattooed arm being wrapped around your shoulder and the other around aitana's. "entonces, chicas, vamos a celebrar la noche entera?" you look up to see jenni hermoso flashing you a dazzling grin.
you had met jenni a few times before, with her visiting alexia every now and then, but you were never brave enough to start a conversation with the tall woman. truth was, she was extremely intimidating to you, probably because she was also extremely hot. however, you had to admit that, as an opponent, she was in addition, extremely annoying. you'd had some interactions in the field whenever england had to play against spain and jenni knew exactly how you worked. it's like she would previously study your every move so she knew how to push your buttons. if you were trying to get the ball, she wouldn't leave your side, if you were getting ready to receive a corner kick with your teammates, she would stand behind you and place her hands on your waist, if she tackled you she would offer her hand with a smug smirk.
you were terrifically infuriated with how easily she could mess with your head on the field and outside the field after a game, often leaving a dm on your instagram saying she couldn't wait to play with you again, followed by a winky face emoji.
right now, her strong arm around you and the way she was grinning at you only managed to redden your cheeks as aitana took the lead in answering her question with a laugh, "pues claro!" jenni ruffled her hair in approval and turned to you, "can i count with you as well?" she asked with challenge in her eyes. "aren't you a bit old to be partying all night?" you challenged back, forcing yourself to keep a straight face and not smile with amusement. that only prompted her grin to grow even wider and her hand to relocate from your shoulder to the side of your neck, playing with your hair. your breath hitched and suddenly you weren't playful anymore, far too aware of jenni's touch and her gaze. "so you do have a mouth." jenni remarked, the stupid smirk never leaving her face. 
aitana caught notice of this flirty interaction between you two and felt something boil in her chest, an ugly feeling she couldn't quite tell what it was but didn't like at all.
the club was already full when you got in with lucy and ona later that night, music blaring and people filling the dance floor. you noticed aitana dancing with some of the girls, a little too close for your liking. but she didn't want you like you wanted her, that's what you needed to remind yourself of. therefore, you might as well find a way to have fun tonight without her. you three reached the tables where most of the girls were gathered to greet everyone. 
you swiftly made your way to the bar, ready to start your fun. you were waiting for the bartender when you felt a breath on your ear, "you know, standing behind you outside of a football field can be even more exhilarating than i thought." you recognized jenni's voice right away and a smile slowly formed on your face. this, whatever it was, could be part of your fun, right?
you turned around and ignored your instinct to take a step back out of surprise, given how close jenni was to you. your eyes naturally scanned her body before your brain could even scold you for it and force you to put on a nonchalant mask. they finally looked up at her face, blush already visible on yours. the always present and annoying smirk she had on when talking to you turned to the bartender to order you two a drink.
"you know, i always wondered when you were going to finally talk to me, princesa."
"why would it matter to you?"
she cocked her head to the side, eyeing you curiously.
"i like corrupting pretty innocent girls who look like they could rip my head off in the field but then avoid me like the plague." she bit her lip, trying to hold off an amused smile when you roll your eyes.
"why have you never done so before, then?"
"alexia doesn't let me get too close to her players – and it seems she's not the only one." she points her head towards aitana, who's been watching you two interact from the dance floor with a frown on her face. 
you turn back to the bar to grab your drink and begin gulping it down, trying to keep your mind off of the catalan that up to that point had you wrapped around her little finger. "maybe you just have a bad reputation." you bite on the piece of lemon it was given to you and lick the bitter taste off of your lips. you noticed that had caught jenni's attention and asked, now with a small smirk, "should i be wary of that?"
her eyes never left your face as her strong hand carefully moved up your neck to your jaw, pulling you closer. you could feel her breath on your lips when she goes "i want to do bad things to you but i think it's something you should test yourself." 
your heart starts beating faster, blood rushing to your cheeks and your thighs pressing together involuntarily. just one move and your lips would be touching hers.
all of a sudden, your body is jerked away abruptly from the bar and jenni by a hand grabbing your arm and leading you in the direction of the club's exit. you look up to see aitana and let yourself be dragged outside where you pull back your arm, making her face you. "what exactly do you think you're doing, aitana?!" the rush and amount of emotions you had felt in the span of a minute made you question her with annoyance in your voice.
"that's what i should ask you. que haces con jenni?" aitana looked at you incredulously, an angry scowl visible on her face. you had only seen her angry on the pitch, and even then those moments were rare. but now she was pissed at you? for what? that only aggravated you further.
"what do you mean 'what am i doing with jenni'? you and i are nothing. you made it clear yourself multiple times. you can't have me whenever you want me and expect me to wait when you don't feel like it anymore. so do not tell me who i should or should not hang out with."
"but it's not just hanging out, is it?" she puffs air out of her nose, the frown never leaving her face.
"do you actually care or are you just jealous someone other than you is getting my attention?" you bite back.
"i'm not jealous. i'm just curious." she mumbled, crossing her arms and looking away, doing everything now to avoid your furious gaze.
"oh, so you're just curious. that's why you dragged me away from her like that." you say, sarcasm on the tip of your tongue.
she finally looks at you with an exasperated sigh, "and i'm worried. of course i care about you! and i know jenni isn't looking for anything other than–" she cuts herself off for a moment, knowing what she would say next would make her sound like a hypocrite.
"well, then that makes two of you, doesn't it?" the anger in your voice subsides but your tone is still bitter. aitana furrows her eyebrows together, a sad frown taking shape in her face at your words.
"the difference, aitana, is that if you tell me, right here, right now, that you want something with me, that you're not going to rush into my arms one minute and act like nothing happened the next, i'll stay. i won't go back in there to jenni or anyone."
"i–" aitana stutters, you can see her eyes begging you not to go back but her voice can't say the same. "i--i'm sorry. tú sabes que no puedo hacerlo." she whispers, almost as if she's ashamed to say it. 
you nod, fighting back your tears. silence looms between you both before you finally answer back, "that settles it then." you clear your throat before your voice can betray you any further for showing so much vulnerability in that moment. you turn around and start walking away, picking up your phone to call an uber when you see a message.
"28A 3rd floor. i expect to see you there ;) - jenni"
you seriously couldn't understand how this woman was capable of exuding cockiness even through text.
you managed to stay in your hotel room for about 30 minutes before temptation and frustration got a hold of you and you marched your way to jenni's.
you take a deep breath and knock on the door.
immediately you can't resist the urge to roll your eyes when jenni opens the door with a smug smirk on her face, crossing her arms and leaning against the door frame.
"took you long enough."
"shut up." you pushed at her chest and made your way inside.
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lanabuckybarnes · 3 days
Text
Missed Dates.
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(I do not own any photos used, credit to original owners)
Bucky arranges a date for you both on the day he comes back from a mission, a date that he doesn't remember. Unfortunately, it's the straw that breaks the camel's back.
AN: Hello how are we all? sorry for not posting yesterday. I’ve got a limited amount of drafts and I wanna spread them before I run out of content.
Pairing: Bucky x Reader
Warnings: Bucky done be neglecting his bf duties.
Word count: around 918 (where'd they come from?)
(Bucky ever looked at my like that I’d be on my knees)
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Bucky has been busy with missions again. His pardon was never really a pardon, more of a we’ll forgive you if you do our dirty work. You can’t remember the last time he’d spent more than 2 weeks with you and in those 2 weeks, he was constantly being called away to meetings or other things.
The distance was becoming unbearable, you loved Bucky you really did but the time away from him was putting a wedge between you two. You’re last date night you’d dressed up all nice for him, he would be arriving back in New York around 5 pm, you had warned him about organising a date after a long mission— especially with his sleep pattern— but he brushed you off with a sweet kiss and honey-toned words.
When his heavy feet stomped into the apartment you knew he was tired, what you didn’t expect was for him to flop onto the couch and go to sleep. You checked the time, 4.45 pm, you were never making your reservation.
You heaved a sigh and swallowed the thick slew of emotions bubbling up your throat as you turned on your heel to take off the stupid dress.
That morning he’d woke up, brewed you both a coffee and said not a word about your missed date yesterday, usually he’d apologise for sleeping without so much as a hello and you told him there was no need but something about him completely glossing over the fact he hadn’t even mentioned your unsuccessful date— the first in over 2 months.
“Everything alright sweetheart?” His brows furrowed and his words cautious at the sight of your sour face, clearly you hadn’t been hiding your emotions very well, and the sound of his voice had anger washing over you
“Everything’s peachy” you spat, noticing instantly how his face turned to one of confusion, then anger.
“Hey, what’s your problem?” One of Bucky’s flaws was how defensive he got easily. You were rarely angry with him so to have you hiss at him, his guard was raised instantly.
“My problem!? I should be asking you, what’s your problem Bucky?” The words felt so foreign like they weren’t falling from your mouth. Bucky thought so too.
“I didn’t have a problem until you got all pissy, why?” He retorted, his jaw and fists clenching to suppress the urge to raise his voice.
“You wanna know why? Fine! Two fucking months we haven’t been on a date and when I get dressed up for you, after warning you about organising a date straight after you came off a plane, you sank your ass right on that couch and slept. I should’ve known Bucky I really should’ve” You stormed off to your shared bedroom, the slamming of the wood wasn’t the cause of Bucky’s flinch.
He’d forgotten all about you, you’d done your best for him and he’d completely disregarded it, he felt like the biggest piece of shit in the world.
He had to think of how to make it up to you.
An hour later there was a soft knock on the door, startling you awake. You rubbed at your sensitive eyes— you’d cried yourself to sleep because of the guilt you felt shouting at Bucky. You knew the risk of him being unable to do certain things due to missions and such was extremely high, you knew his sleep pattern was the worst leading him to stay awake days at a time, yet you still screamed at him.
You had every right to advocate for your needs but you couldn’t help that sinking feeling in your stomach.
A second knock pulled you from your trance “Hey…. Sweetheart, can I come in?” His voice was muffled by the door but you could tell he shared the same emotions as you.
“Y-yeah” you mentally cursed your hoarse throat.
Bucky entered holding a white box and a bag, his eyes looking slightly red and his shoulders slumped. Gently he took a seat next to you, far enough away that it hurt, you felt like you’d pushed him that far.
“Look I’m really sorry I forgot about yesterday, you warned me and I didn’t listen… I’ve booked us again for tomorrow if you’re up for it” he explained, flashing you his nervous smile.
“Didn’t you have-“
“I called in, let them know I was taking time off for some private reasons” he interrupted, his hand hovering over the white box he’d now placed between you on the bed. He opened it gently, his smile growing as he did. Inside was a cake, with cursive fondant.
‘I’m so sorry I’m an ass’
You couldn’t help but laugh at the decoration, your laugh drawing a chuckle from him as well
“I uhh also bought some snacks, I was thinking we could watch that movie you wanted to see” he spoke as his laughter died down, now replaced with a slight shyness.
Bucky might be a man with many flaws, yes sometimes he prioritised his work over you and he really tried to balance you both but sometimes it got too much. You had to admit though, the man truly knew the way to his woman’s heart.
“So?” He questioned, his fingers tapping his knee as his ocean blue eyes darted over your face.
“Aww Buck… I love you”
He smiled widely, relief pooling in his veins. leaning over he kissed you deeply.
“You know… you gotta make up for shouting at me” he mumbled against your lips.
This man. He was lucky he was cute.
-
THE URGE TO MAKE THIS AN ANGST AHHHH.
You guys are soo lucky I can’t write angst. I hope you enjoyed my 5am thoughts xx
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iinsertblognamee · 2 days
Text
the streets of barcelona
summary; yn foord and alexia putellas meet
spanish | english translation
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"You got everything packed?"
A small nod was all you responded back to your sister, as you let yourself get one last look at your shared apartment. The room looked practically the same from a simple glance, the discoloured paint on the walls mixed with the old posters you had found at a garage sale when you first moved in. The kitchen sink holds the dirty plates from breakfast, alongside the empty wine glasses from last night's celebrations.
You let yourself study the room further, the missing objects standing out to you like a sore thumb, the rooms somehow seeming bare without all your personal items that were now packed away and about halfway towards your new apartment.
Your eye caught Caitlin's at the last second, a small frown appearing on her lips, her eyes still red from last night. It doesn't take long for her eyes to well up once again, her bottom lip wobbling.
The distance between you two becomes extinct in an instant, as your arms wrap around each other. Your grips are so tight that neither of you can't make it if it's you or the younger woman who is shaking, but you don't dare to let go. Your lips press kisses in her hairline, as you mumble 'It's going to be okay' mixed with 'You're gonna be okay'.
It couldn't have been a few minutes before the timer on your phone filled the silence, Cailtin tenses in your embrace, before sniffling.
You give yourself one last squeeze, before pulling away. Bringing your hand up to Caitlin's cheek to wipe away her tears.
You had both said your official goodbyes last night, hoping to avoid all of this, this morning.
"I'm gonna miss you chicky" She sent you a small smile at the nickname, before grabbing your suitcase from the front door as you grabbed your passport and plane ticket.
You had arranged a pickup service to take you to the airport, wanting a few moments before you were thrown into the madness that was about to come. As excited as you were, you couldn't deny the anxiety that followed. The idea of a new team was always nerve-racking, but the added stress of moving to a country with no one you know, as well as speaking very little Spanish was keeping you on edge.
The driver met you at the steps of your apartment, taking the suitcase off your sister, as she pulled you into one last hug, squeezing you extra tight before letting go - a small wave and a 'good luck' and then she was gone.
The car ride over was nerve-racking, your knee bouncing as you watched the houses outside go by. The traffic was decent enough, the sun shining down on the airport as you thanked the driver once more, before making your way through the entry.
You gave one last look outside, taking in the sunny London that you had called home for the past three years, the crumbling thought finally hitting you.
London was no longer home.
The sight of Barcelona was a sight for sore eyes, your suitcase trailing behind as you attempted to move around the groups of people surrounding the waiting bay.
You had been contacted by the management team a few days prior organising a driver to pick you up from the airport and take you to your new apartment, figuring the last thing you needed was to get lost on your first day in Barcelona.
You looked out for the number plate you had memorised, walking past car after car - apologising to the people you bumped into along the way. It would have been one of the last cars parked on the strip, a woman dressed in familiar colours, sitting on the hood with her arms crossed.
She had thick sunglasses on, dark so you couldn't tell if she was watching you or not but as you got closer, her attention seemed to shift from the skyline to you. Her arms don't uncross, as she stands up - her head visibly looking you up and down before a calm, but detached look appeared on her face.
"Miss Foord?"
"Sí-" 'Yes'. You blame the flight for the way your voice cracks, coughing a little before nodding your head "Yes, yes. sorry." She nods her head but doesn't add anything else, opening the back door for you before taking the suitcase out of your hand and walking towards the boot.
The awkwardness doesn't help your beating heart, wiping your palms on your track pants before dipping your way into the car. Making sure to close the door behind you.
The lady makes her way into the front of the car a few seconds later. The radio plays softly in the background, your attention glued out your window as you watched the city fly by - attempting to remember every street sign and building you see.
"¿Cómo estuvo tu vuelo?". 'How was your flight?'.
Your head whips right around, the lady looking towards the road, you almost think you might have imagined she spoke, your mouth opening before closing again.
The silence fills the space in an instant, a frown appearing on your lips. The car comes to a stop at the lights, the driver turning her head towards you with a look on her face that you take as confusion.
"Uh. Lo sien" 'uh. I'm sorry'. The sudden realisation that you have no idea what she's asked, and now you can't even remember the basic Spanish you taught yourself since the transfer was confirmed. "Uh no. no entiendo?". 'uh no. I don't understand'. You wince at your attempt, the confusion clear in your voice as the driver tilts her head a little before turning her attention back to the road.
"How was the flight?" Her English is a hundred times better than your Spanish, Her voice seems softer in English, not as deep.
"Good. Uh. Buena. It was Buena. Fast, Which is always good" 'good'. your attempt to bring some Spanish into the conversation isn't missed by the driver, her lips curling into a small smirk before disappearing almost as fast.
"Sí, eso es bueno" 'Yes that is good'. As limited as your Spanish knowledge may run, you pick up 'yes' and 'good', nodding your head with a small smile as she catches your gaze in the rear mirror.
Feeling a little more confident, you give yourself a few seconds to think up what other Spanish you have learnt before attempting to start up a conversation again.
"What's uh, um. ¿Su nombre?" 'Your name?'
"Camila"
"Camila" You repeat, looking out the window again.
"I help get the transfers settled" She adds, turning a corner before catching your gaze in the rear mirror once again. "It's a beautiful place but can be very daunting".
"Sí. Sí" 'yes. yes'. You agree before adding "But very exciting. My, um, my hermana is very jealous" 'sister'.
"¿Tienes una hermana?" 'you have a sister?'. She catches herself before you can ask, "You have a sister?"
"Sí. Sí. A younger sister. She's a footballer too" 'yes. yes'.
"Maravillosa. Maravillosa. Wonderful". 'wonderful. wonderful'.
Before you could respond, the car came to a stop - your attention pulled away from Camila and out towards the modern building.
You recognised it in an instant, the many photos and emails that you and management had been exchanging over the past couple of months came down to this.
"Hogar dulce hogar" 'home sweet home'. You couldn't find yourself asking what Camila had said, too engrossed with the building in front of you, it seemed bigger than in the pictures, prettier too.
You take a deep breath in, glancing at the building once more before taking a deep breath and opening the car door.
"Welcome Home" and for once you wished Camila had spoken in Spanish so you wouldn't understand what she had just said.
Camila didn't stay for too long, handing over your keys and helping you bring up your suitcase, she had written her contact details on a piece of paper that was left on your kitchen bench. Explained that she would be back tomorrow to bring you to training and then left.
Your furniture had arrived before you had, placed through the apartment alongside all your boxes. If you hadn't been so emotionally drained for the past 24 hours you probably would have attempted to start unpacking but your hunger won this round, and with some newfound confidence you decided to check out the supermarket that was just down the street.
The walk was nice enough, a slight breeze filling the streets as people passed by.
Getting to your destination, 'tienda de comestibles' 'grocery'. written out the front, buckets of fresh fruit outside brought a smile to your face before walking in. The smell of many different flavours fills the air, and two children giggling and chasing each other almost run into you, before quickly yelling out 'Lo lamento' 'sorry'. You only smile and shake your head, taking yourself further through the store.
You pick out some cold meats, before grabbing yourself a couple of bread rolls, a small jar of pesto and a chocolate bar. Making your way towards the checkout, your attention purely on grabbing some notes out of your wallet, before slamming into a body.
"¿Adónde vas?!" 'Where are you going?!'.
Your head snaps up, an apology on the tip of your tongue, before sucking your breath in, her eyes widening as they meet yours.
Your brain seems to short-circuit, working overtime to say something, anything. Your limited knowledge of Spanish has completely gone, your mouth opening and closing before you practically choke out
"La Reina" 'the queen'.
You feel the heat rush through your cheeks instantly as your eyes widen.
"Como me llamaste?" 'what did you call me?'. she choked out, her cheeks almost matching yours. You take a step back, suddenly realising just how close the two of you were to each other.
"I am so sorry. lo lamento. lo lamento" 'I'm sorry. I'm sorry'. You splatter out, taking a few more steps back, attempting to get away as fast as possible but a hand stops you. Her hand.
"Ey. No hay necesidad de disculparse" 'hey. there's no need to apologise'.
Her words are missed by you, although her eyes soften - your confusion clear as you try to think about to all those Spanish classes you took. Concentration seemed to be your biggest fault at the moment, especially with the way she was looking at you.
"Don't apologise" Her voice was softer that you almost missed what she was saying, her hand rubbing your arm distracted you once again.
"Sorry," you reply, your cheeks heating up further as she lets out a small laugh, shaking her head with a smile on her lips. "Tan linda" 'so cute'. she mumbles, but you manage to catch it with how close you are once again.
"I-I don't know what that means" you mumble back.
Her cheeks heat up once again, her eyes suddenly interested in anything but yours.
She shakes her head, before her gaze catches yours once more, dropping down to your lips and then back up. She goes to say something else before a cough brings you both back, a mother with a baby on her hip looking at the pair of you with annoyance.
"Estoy tratando de pasar" 'I'm trying to get through'. Her voice is sharp, the footballer in front of you moving you both out of her way, a small "Lo lamento" 'sorry'. leaving her lips, as the woman just scoffs and walks past the pair of us.
The silence fills the space instantly, your eyes finding hers once again. The moment is gone, as you bite your lip - unsure what to say next.
A quick glance at the clock on the wall creates a chain reaction, a yawn leaving your lips as the events of the past twenty-four hours finally catch up to you.
You bring your hand over your mouth, yawning once again.
"Perdóname" 'forgive me'.
The Spanish leaving your lips brings a smile to her face once again, her eyes lighting up.
"¿tú hablas español?" 'you speak spanish?'. Her voice light, a small laugh finishing the question off.
"un poco. aunque no muy bueno" 'a bit. although not very good'. You struggle a little, your pronunciation not perfect, but the smile on her face as her eyes watch your hand indicate 'a little bit' is enough to bring a smile back to your face.
"It's okay, I'll teach you" Her switch to English surprises you, her voice lighter than her native tongue. Your excitement at the thought fills, your eyes widening at the thought, "Really?"
"sí, claro. sería un honor para mí" 'yes of course. It would be an honour for me'. You catch enough of the sentence to understand she's true to her offer.
"Thank you, Alexia"
"No hay problema mi amor" 'no problem my love'.
The blush that attacks your cheeks at the sound of 'amor' 'love'. coming off her lips only widens her smile.
She vowed for that day on, she would always call you 'mi amor' 'my love'.
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flemingsfreckles · 2 days
Text
Better Boyfriend than Him (18+) pt.3
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Jessie Fleming x Reader
Preview: Part 1, Part 2 the more time you spend in Jessie’s bed the more you start to realize maybe it’s more than good sex
Warnings: Smut (18+), frat boy Jessie vibes, oral (r receiving), fingering (r receiving), strap on (r receiving), rough sex, dirty talk, praise kink, overstimulation, edging, cursing
WC: 4.9k
A/N: this is like a 50/50 smut/not smut split. For the sake of this series continuing it unfortunately couldn’t just be straight banging, so there’s a little plot.
“Please, Jessie, please.” You yelled into your pillow as Jessie was behind you thrusting roughly, her thighs slapping hard against the back of yours. She was putting so much force into you that you were gripping the bed sheets to prevent your body from moving. Your body was exhausted but you fought against her thrusts to keep your knees under you.
Letting her use the strap on you had been like opening the floodgates of sex between the two of you. You had both fallen asleep together in her bed after the first time she used it on you. When you woke up Jessie had moved to the living room where she was sitting watching tv. You had sat down next to her, it only took a few minutes for her hand to move onto your thigh and before you knew it, she was kneeling in front of the couch with her face buried between your legs making you cum for the third and fourth time that day. Instead of coming over to just hang out with her, you came over to hang out, but also you weren’t going to turn down mind blowing sex.
You felt bad for both of your neighbors over the past few weeks, you alternated between your place and hers but it was still an excessive amount of sex being had that your poor neighbors had to hear. The sex had somehow managed to get better, you’re not sure how but it had. You were beginning to try more things, but Jessie was still hesitant about being too fast or hard on you. She still need some encouragement here and there, sometime getting caught up in the fact that she cared about you more than her other hookups, unable to completely let herself go. She tended to be soft, making sure her actions were slow, gentle.
You could feel when she would hold herself back from being rough. She’d get caught up and move faster or harder, you’d let out a whimper or a cry out of surprise or pleasure and she’d immediately slow back down much to your dismay. Despite your encouragement, she kept it gentle. While it was nice and made you feel comfortable and safe at the beginning, but you were secretly dying for her to be rough with you.
That’s how you both ended up here. You had decided to tease her all day in hopes it would lead to some rougher behavior from her. Today was one of the busiest days you had, 3 classes in a row followed by a lab. You had worn your lowest cut shirt and the smallest bra you owned, making sure your chest was fully on display. You had picked out a red lacy thong that you had just bought yourself with the idea of Jessie taking it off in mind.
When you sat down next to her in your first class you watched her eyes attach to your chest, her mouth falling slightly open.
“Like what you see Fleming?” You gently shake your chest in her direction.
“Are you trying to make me fail?”
“No. If anything I’m helping you. If you’re good today and pay attention during class I’ll let you see what I’ve got under my skirt.” You lean over, letting your hot breath tickle her neck and ear “not to give away the secret but it’s lacy and red and I bought it with you in mind.”
Her face flushes but she grabs out her notebook and a pen. You watch as she actually takes notes in class for once, instead of just doodling and then asking you for help later when she doesn’t understand something.
You continue to tease her over the next few classes, you can tell she’s becoming more and more frustrated as the day goes on. She’s more frequently glancing at your chest, biting her lip, she even tries to place her hand on your thigh in your last class. Quickly pushing her hand away she sends a begging glance your way. You turn to her and mouth ‘later’ to her. She rolls her eyes and goes back to taking notes.
That’s how you ended face down, ass in the air with Jessie pounding herself into you. You finally had broken through and she was being rough with you.
She had thrown you around the second you walked into her apartment. She had nearly ripped your shirt pulling it over your head and stripped you of your bra while you were still against the wall in the hallway to her bedroom. She had ordered you to leave the thong on after she pushed you onto her bed. She had walked to her dresser, grabbed the strap and lube as she usually did and came back over to you. Her hands had spread your legs, and she dropped her face to start teasing you.
She had licked and touched you through the fabric of your underwear, making you feel some of the same teasing that you had put her through all day. She had grabbed the fabric between her teeth, pulling it back before letting it snap against your skin making you moan.
Instead of taking it off Jessie had pushed the fabric to the side, holding it with her thumb, and let her tongue start pleasing you. Each time she would feel your legs begin to shake and your grip on her head get tighter, she’d pull back much to your disappointment. She was edging you, teasing you as much as she could and it was ruining you. You whined after she pulled away for the second time.
“Oh my god, Jessie seriously?” You were getting frustrated with her the way she’d get you so close to the edge and pull away.
“This is what happens when you’re a fucking tease all day. Wearing that tight fucking shirt, putting your tits on display for everyone, telling me about this tiny little thing.” She snaps the elastic of your thong again. “You did this to yourself.”
You were so sensitive, squirming under her as she held you in place, after the third time she pulled away when she returned she added fingers into you with her tongue. It took only a couple thrusts before you closed your legs around her, cumming hard on her face and fingers. Jessie wasn’t done, not satisfied with her reward for being a good student today she continued.
Giving you no time to recover she pulled down your now soaking wet thong, leaving you completely bare. She had flipped you over and pulled your hips up and toward her own. She had never fucked you in this position before, you usually were facing each other in some way. Not wanting to actually hurt you she had still paused to put lube on despite how wet you already were, your arousal dripping down making your thighs and the bed wet. She had pushed into you at a quick but still sensible pace. The new position made your hole even tighter, you felt her stretching you out.
Jessie didn’t wait this time for you to say anything, she started thrusting immediately pulling the whole length out, leaving just the tip touching your entrance before slamming her hips back into yours. The first few thrusts were pleasure mixed with pain but something about the mixed feeling, torn between pushing her away and wanting to pull her even closer was exhilarating.
“You’re taking me so fucking well. Being such a good girl.” You hadn’t explicitly discussed it but Jessie had quickly realized you had a small praise kink. She had accidentally called you a good girl another time in bed and you had blushed at the phrase while letting out a dirty moan. It should’ve been obvious given that you were a people pleaser, a teacher's pet, it made sense that being told you were doing well was a turn on.
“So perfect for me, you're being such a good reward, letting me take you like this, letting me do whatever I want to you. So good.”
Jessie’s words were surprising, in the numerous times you had slept together in the past week, she had never been this vocal. Some moaning and a couple words here and there but it was simple stuff. Her telling you you’re doing good, that you feel good, taste good, but never to the extent of what she was telling you now.
With the previous edging and orgasm it’s only a couple minutes before you’re shaking under her,
“You want to cum again? Make a mess on my cock?”
“Mhmm” not able to get out words you moan in response. Her thrusts stop, her dick fully inside of you. She leans forward somehow making it feel like the strap on was even further inside of you. Her hand comes up to grab your hair and pull your head up and off the pillow. You’re now looking at the ceiling and can just barely see Jessie’s face
“Good girls use their words.” Those words falling from her mouth in a husky voice is nearly enough for you to cum without any further stimulation.
“Yes I want to cum.” You’re able to get out the words now that she’s not pounding into you.
“Ask the right way.” Her grip on your head tightens as she waits for you to beg for her.
You weren’t fully sure what she meant by the right way, but you knew she’d tell you if it was wrong.
“Please Jessie, please make me cum, I want to cum for you, can I?” You’re whining, hoping she doesn’t deny your plea. You didn’t have much experience with dirty talk, you had previously felt uncomfortable saying much of anything in the bedroom, but with Jessie it was comfortable and she made you want to beg.
“Good girl.” She says as she drops your hair moving her hands back to your hips. Her thrusting picks up right where it left off, she’s picking up speed, you're being thrown forward so hard you have to put your hands on the headboard to make sure you don’t hit it.
“Fuck, I’m going to cum Jess, please.”
“Go ahead.” She says so calmly, as if she was giving you permission to take the last piece of cake, not for you to unravel underneath her in a writhing mess. Unable to hold yourself up as you give in to your orgasm you collapse onto the bed, laying down flat, your face turned to the side, eyes screwed shut, you’re biting your lip so hard you’re sure there will be blood, groans coming through your teeth.
Jessie doesn’t stop when you collapse under her or when she feels your legs shaking. She lowers herself to stay inside of you. She keeps thrusting as you cum around her.
“Jess” a whine comes from your lips trying to let her know you were on your way to being oversensitive, the edging from before taking its toll.
“Give me one more.” She demands from behind you.
“I can’t.” You’re really not sure if you can or not, the feeling between your legs is so overwhelming you’re not sure how much longer you can take it.
“Yes you can and you will. Be a good girl. You wanted to cum, I’m letting you cum.”
Her praise has you wanting to listen to her, wanting to follow her command. She puts her body weight onto you, she’s warm and sweaty, the new angle gives you a slight relief as she’s hitting a new spot inside of you but it’s only a few seconds later that you feel another orgasm surface again.
Your moans get softer until you’re left with your mouth open, no noise coming out as you have your third orgasm that afternoon. This one was short, pleasure running through your body only for it to be immediately followed up by the pain of overstimulation. Tears start to fill your eyes, you whole body feels like it’s on fire, every nerve ending screaming at you. Instinctively you try to pull yourself away from Jessie as she continues to fuck into you but her weight is holding you to the bed, unable to move.
“Fuck Jessie. Stop, stop!” You're able to throw your hand behind your back finding her hips that had already stalled at your word to stop. “Fuck.”
Jessie is frozen behind you, she doesn’t move at all. The strap is halfway into you, it remains there as she stops moving.
“What do you want me to do? Pull out?” Her voice that was previously full of confidence and arrogance is now one of concern and comfort.
“No, don’t pull out yet, just give me a second.” You were done, you wanted her to pull out but knew the sensation of her sliding out would be uncomfortable in the moment.
“You don’t have to be frozen Jess.” You could feel how tense she was behind you. Trying to reassure her that she wasn’t going to break you if she moved. She readjusts slowly putting more of her weight off of you and onto her own legs, making sure not to move her hips and change how she was inside of you.
“Take it out please.” Feeling yourself relax enough, you tell her to pull out. Jessie follows your direction, gently moving her hips back from yours to pull out. You curse into the pillow as she does, the drag of the strap against your overly sensitive walls was uncomfortable.
“Did I hurt you?” You can't see, still face down in the pillow, but she sounds quiet and far away, you no longer can feel her touch against your skin.
“Not really? I don’t know?” You’re really not sure, you’ve never been so overstimulated, it wasn’t necessarily painful but it wasn’t a good feeling. It was on the tiny line between pain and immense pleasure. Using what strength you had left you use your arms to push yourself up and flip over. Jessie’s hands grab your calves and help move your legs, resting one on each side of where she was sat back on her feet. “It was just too much I think. But I’m not hurt, no.”
“I’m sorry.”
“No need to apologize, you didn't do anything wrong. Technically you did everything right, you did it so well, I couldn’t handle it.” You make a joke trying to lighten her mood. She grabs the strap on the harness and slides them off, picking up each leg to slide it off and tossing it to the floor.
“Can I lay down?” You know she’s referring to if she can lay down on top of you, a small action she had started doing after sex. She had done it out of exhaustion the first few times and once when she didn’t do it, you had made a comment about it. Now she does it everytime. There was something so safe about both of you laying, skin to skin, after letting her do unmentionable things to you just moments before.
“Please do.” You weren’t sure if this time it was more for you or her. It was usually you asking for her to lay but the way you could read the guilt on her face made you realize that maybe today, being able to lay on you would help her more than it would you.
She gently places her body on top of yours, her arms wrap about and under your back, her face falls into the crook of your neck. You face goes to the same place on her. You stay wrapped together, neither of you moving, just breathing and holding each other.
“I think I got a little carried away.” She says into your neck. Jessie presses herself up, putting her face above yours. “I’m sorry. I just, with the teasing all day, not that it’s your fault. I just got so pent up, I should’ve checked in before we started. To see if it was okay to be like that.”
“Hey it’s okay, I would've told you to do exactly what you did, the whole reason I teased you was because I wanted to rile you up, to get you to be rough with me.”
“You want me to be rough?” She gives you a questioning glance.
“Yes, I’ve been trying to get you to be for a couple days now.” You let your hand gently drag up and down her back reassuring her with physical touch.
“Oh. Sorry I was too rough.” You can tell by her face she still feels guilty.
“Please don’t feel bad about what just happened. I really enjoyed it Jessie, it just became too much. But I really liked how you were talking to me.” Your hands come up to cover your face as you admit to her you liked her dirty talk.
“Oh yeah?” Her cockiness comes back for a moment. She moves your hands away from your face and plants a kiss on your lips. It’s a quick kiss, nothing sexual about it. She had been doing that more often. Giving you kisses when you’d walk by, giving you a kiss when you’d show up at her door, a kiss when you get ready to go back home.
“Do you need anything? Water? Food? Do you need pain meds?”
“Maybe just a shower.” Normally Jessie took the time to clean you up after you had sex, she’d bring a towel or washcloth with warm water and gently clean you up, but after today she had wanted to stay close to you, not wanting to even wander off as far as the bathroom for a couple minutes.
“Yeah of course.” Jessie moved off of your body, hopping off the bed and standing next to you. She held her hands out to you. Feeling the soreness already setting in you swung your legs over the side of the bed and hopped onto the floor. Jessie held your hands before moving a hand to your waist watching you wobble as you began to step toward the bathroom. She turned on the water for you and grabbed out a fresh towel.
“I’ll be in the living room if you need anything, just shout and I’ll come.” She turns to leave. Part of you wants to ask if she’ll join you. You decide against it. Jessie had yet to fully undress in front of you at any point during sex. She had made it routine to take off her shirt and pants but never further than that. You were okay with that, you didn’t mind being on the receiving end, but you also had a small urge to return the favor. You wanted to make her feel even half as good as she had been able to make you feel. You wanted to make her feel comfortable and safe enough with you to take them off if she wanted to.
You couldn’t help but think if she’d been intimate in that way with anyone else. You’re sure she had but the more you thought about it, you could only recall times she had talked about her doing things to girls, never anyone returning the favor. You shook that thought from your head, that was her choice, not for you to push.
Jumping from one thought to the next your brain brought up the question of what were you doing? What was the point with Jessie? Was it just experimenting? Was it just for fun? Was she just a good fuck? Friends with benefits maybe? The longer you stood under the water the longer you thought about her. The longer you thought about the brown hair, brown eyed girl waiting in the other room, the more you realized, you maybe didn’t want to just be friends with benefits. You quickly shut off the water, realizing you had been in the shower a significant amount of time and Jessie would probably come to check on you if you didn’t emerge shortly.
You stepped out, wrapping a towel around your chest. You moved to the other side of the bathroom, taking a second to look in the mirror. You pulled the towel open, to look at the full extent of Jessie’s work. You were littered with hickeys, some from days before, now a light yellow shade as they nearly faded. Others a deep blood red, from only a few minutes ago. She had put them everywhere, your stomach, your chest, your collarbone, shoulders, hip bones, there were a few on the inside of your thighs. There were a few tiny ones on your neck. All low down that they could be easily hidden with a hoodie, your only request to her. As you looked at each one you could remember the feeling of her lips and tongue, taking the time to make the mark on your skin.
“Admiring something?” Jessie’s voice startles you, causing you to jump.
“Just the marks you left.” You turn to her, holding your towel still open. Her eyes drag over your body slowly, stopping for a second at each mark.
“Some of my finest work.” She smirks at you. “Sorry I didn’t mean to scare you, you were just taking a while, wanted to make sure you were still standing.”
“Yeah sorry I just got lost in though. If your water bill is extreme this month I’ll cover it.” You wrap yourself back up in the towel.
“Do you want some other clothes? I can’t imagine that bra is in the slightest bit comfortable.” She’s already rummaging through her drawers for a shirt and sweatpants. She tosses both in your direction. “Underwear too? I think I have a clean pair of yours from a different time.” Her hands flip through a stack of clothes in a wash basket. The pair of underwear comes flying from her hand in your direction.
“Yeah it wasn’t super comfortable and neither was the thong but it was worth it.” You pull on the clothes she gave you. A pair of her UCLA sweatpants and a plain black shirt were a lot more comfortable than the outfit you had been wearing. After dressing you follow Jessie out to her living room. She had gotten out a textbook and notebook paper while you were in the shower.
“Wow, did I turn you into a good student or something?” You say sarcastically, Jessie usually didn’t pull out school work unless you encouraged her to. “If you had just told me all it took was a good bra and a tight shirt to get you to take your own notes I would’ve whipped out a tit a long time ago.”
She looks up at you, unamused by your joke. Moving into her kitchen you grab yourself a glass and fill it before moving back to where Jessie was sitting.
You both work side by side on your assignments, you notice you have to help Jessie less than normal, or maybe it’s just she’s trying harder than she normally does. You can tell when she starts to struggle with a question. Normally she’d turn to you for an explanation, instead today she’ll try it herself. She’ll use the textbook, she even opens the notes she had taken in class, and then if she still needs help she’ll poke you with her pen until you look at her. It’s a nice change, seeing her put forth more effort than normal toward school.
If anything it was you having a hard time getting your work done today. You couldn’t stop thinking about what it was you and Jessie were doing. The same question of was it just friends with benefits, crept up and over again.
“Can I ask you something?” You let the words come out before you have the chance to second guess it.
“Anything.” Jessie says not looking up from where she was writing on her paper. You both had always responded that way when asking each other if you could bring something up. It was what made you such good friends, the openness and communication with one another.
“What are we doing?”
“I’m doing calculus, I don’t know what you’re doing though, you have out your chemistry book but you’re doing physics homework.”
“No Jessie, I mean what are we doing? With the sex?” This draws her attention. She puts her pen down and looks at you.
“What do you mean?”
“Is it just meaningless sex to you?” You needed to know, was this just a hookup for her. You wanted to know if you’d be replaced as soon as she found someone else more suitable, someone who could handle her without stopping her.
“It’s definitely not meaningless.”
“Then what is it?”
“I don’t know, what do you think it is?” She deflects the question back at you.
“I don’t know Jessie, I thought it was just fun, originally I did. But recently, I don’t know. And it’s making me question things and it’s just a little overwhelming.”
“I know what you mean.”
Unsure of what to say you just sit, biting your lip as you think. “I’m not sure if I’m just confused, because we’re so close and we’ve been friends for a while, and now with the sex, I don’t know, I can’t tell what my feelings are, but they’re different then they were before.” You were pretty sure you were developing feelings for her. You had also never had feelings towards another girl so that added confusion on top of the confusion of her being your best friend. “I think about you a lot, more than I did before.”
“I do too, think about you a lot more than I used to. It’s confusing.”
“Would you want to try figuring that out? Like us together?” This was your poor attempt to ask her out on a date, to try exploring those feelings and seeing where they took you.
“Are you implying we date?”
“I don’t know, maybe?”
“I don’t really date, you of all people should know that based on my history.”
“Yeah well based on my history I don’t really have sex with women but apparently things can change.” You throw up your hands in frustration. Jessie doesn’t say anything. She just sits, her pen now back in her hand as she plays with it.
“You know what, forget I said anything.” Embarrassed now that she had essentially rejected your offer on a date you closed your textbook and started to back your stuff. You didn’t want to sit here with her after being rejected.
“No wait.” Jessie puts her hand on top of the textbook stopping you from putting it into your backpack. “I just don’t really know how to.”
“How to what?”
“How to do the whole dating thing. I haven’t actually dated anyone in years, and the last time I did it ended so badly, I just decided to ignore feelings and decided to just stick with sleeping around since, no feelings, no commitments, just the fun, and I’ve been doing that for so long, I don’t know how to do dating. I don’t think I’d do it right.”
“There’s no right way to do it. It’s however we’d want to.” You couldn’t believe you were having this conversation, that there was a small possibility that this could work. “That’s the thing about dating, it’s a trial and error process, that’s why people don’t just jump straight to marriage, dating is for learning. Think of it this way, nothing would really change with us, we already hang out everyday, we know everything about each other, we know the sexual chemistry is there, it would just be adding in the couple-y things.”
“Okay, trial and error, I can do that with you. I’m just nervous I’ll end up losing you. If something were to happen.”
“Is that a yes, you want to try this?” You gesture between the two of you.
“Yes.” Jessie nods, a small smile across her face.
“Okay. I should get going then.” You pick up the textbook you were in the process of packing up, actually throwing it into your backpack this time before sliding the bag onto your shoulders.
“What? Why?” She jumps up from her position on the floor, concerned why you’d be leaving after you just agreed to date.
“I have a hot date to pick up tonight, I have to get ready.” You wink at her and see the realization cross her mind that she meant you. “Be ready by 6.” You check your watch quickly, making sure that gives both of you enough time to get ready. She follows you to the door and you turn to face her to say goodbye. She leans in to steal a kiss but you move your head and place your hands on her shoulders stopping her from coming closer.
“I don’t kiss before the first date. Try again tonight.” You send her a smirk and she rolls her eyes at you. You step out and close the door to her apartment behind you. Reality starts to set in, you just asked her out, and she said yes. Butterflies build up in your stomach, you were taking her out on a date, your best friend.
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maxarchive · 3 days
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Fear, faith, friendship: Inside F1’s most precious relationship
[...]
When now-triple world champion Max Verstappen was first promoted to the Red Bull team mid-season in 2016, race engineer Gianpiero Lambiase was tasked with moulding an 18-year-old possessing both supreme talent and a frank demeanour with only a few days' notice.
"I had experience working with multiple drivers before Max, and that was one of the biggest helps in terms of hitting the ground running with him. I think if I would have been a newbie to my role - I won't quite say he would have eaten me alive, but I'm not sure he would have had that respect for a junior engineer."
Their relationship was an immediate success. Verstappen became the youngest race winner in F1 history, finishing first on his debut at the Spanish Grand Prix. But, generally, the first few years of Lambiase and Verstappen's partnership were spent chasing perennial frontrunners Mercedes.
"Max learned some really harsh lessons in the two or three years before 2021. His racecraft really was something that we focused on, making sure we were just picking up points when it wasn't possible to win a race. We were concentrating on building his consistency, needing to be finishing every race, maybe not putting himself in a situation where he can end up in a 50/50 accident with another driver."
[...]
Sometimes, though, tension between driver and race engineer can spill over in the most high-pressure moments.
Now in his ninth season working with Verstappen, having won the championship in each of the past three seasons, Lambiase's voice is a staple of every F1 broadcast and has become recognisable to fans all around the world.
The pair's success does not mean their communications are entirely straightforward.
"I think it is inevitable in any relationship that there are disagreements. The first port of call is acceptance of that. Secondly, you need to have faith in each other that it is for the greater good rather than there being any kind of malicious undertone. That is at the core of the relationship. As an engineer, I need to understand that ultimately Max is in the hot seat, not me. So while we are all working in a pressurised environment, the driver is at a level well beyond that. As an older citizen I would like to think I am mature enough to step back and let him vent when necessary, but to also make him understand why decisions are being made. If I was a yes man, I would have been gone long ago. We have just got that honesty in the relationship between us that we can be blunt and straight-talking when needed."
As well as coping with adrenaline themselves, race engineers must manage the pressure on their racers.
The 2021 campaign was arguably the most intense in F1's 74-year history. After an acrimonious year marked by heavy collisions between the pair on track and serial sparring between their respective team principals in the paddock, Verstappen and rival Lewis Hamilton's title fight came down to the wire at the season finale in Abu Dhabi.
"I wouldn't want to repeat 2021 in a hurry. It was incredibly competitive on and off the track [but] sometimes I think it went beyond the realms of sport. In terms of taking that pressure away from Max, I tried to stress with everybody here that we continued as normal. We treated every race as a single event rather than trying to look too far down the line at what could be."
[...]
In some cases though, the idea of starting afresh following the end of such a deep connection doesn't appeal any more.
"I honestly see Max as a younger brother. We can talk about anything and anyone at any time. We're at the point where we just felt completely relaxed and at ease with each other. Maybe I am speaking out of turn, but I don't think I would have any interest in working with another driver now. Having had the success that we have enjoyed together with Max, working with one of the greatest talents that the sport has ever seen, I don't think it would be fair on another driver, from their perspective or mine, to try and replicate what we have achieved with Max."
In Formula 1, as in all our lives, the magic of the most special relationships will always remain utterly unique.
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mapileonxputellas · 19 hours
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Beckham II: 3 Nerves
The third part is finally here! I hope you enjoy.
Masterlist can be found here.
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9th February 2023
“Breaking news this lunch time, Sarina Weigman had named her squad for the Arnold Clark cup and included in the squad for the first time in nearly 4 years is Y/N Beckham.” England squads weren’t typically breaking news on the main news channels but this was no ordinary squad announcement. “Widely considered as one of the best players on the planet, Beckham has not been including in an England squad since the 2019 World Cup and her return dominated the press conference.”
Squad announcement press conferences are usually comminated by a few stories, the surprise inclusions, the ones who don’t quite make the cut. However when the list was read out it was immediately clear what all the questions would be about today as the eyes of world football turned to Sarina.
“Sarina can you tell us more about Beckham’s inclusion? Why has this decision been taken now after 4 years?”
“I know you’re all probably very interested in that so I’ll try and answer all of your questions. This hasn’t been a simple process for either party, I’d be lying if I said I hadn’t been watching her since I became England manager but it’s not that simple and we had to respect the fact that Y/N did not want to be called up. Over the past few weeks I’ve been working closer with her and we’ve agreed that now is the right time to see if we can make progress.”
“The squad has changed a lot since then but there are still players who would were in the squad in 2019, have you spoken to them about this?”
“I have not, I’d like to think that all players support each other and I know my players well enough to know that they will do all they can to make Y/N feel welcome in this environment both on and off the pitch.”
“Do you have any concerns around her desire to play for England and play for the badge. Will she have lost that fight in the past four years?”
“I can not prove that to you and I guess none of us will know the answer until she plays for England again but I would not pick any player I had those concerns about. I’ve watcher her play a lot for Barcelona and over this past year especially I’ve seen a freedom to her play. I just hope that we can all see that side of her in an England shirt.”
“David, were you shocked when the announcement was made?”
“I mean obviously we spoke about prior to the announcement but when she told me I wasn’t exactly shocked. It just annoyed me that people questioned her mentally because she is so strong now.”
…..
Everyone could tell you were anxious. Since the announcement on Thursday you’d been quieter than usual in training, your usual sweet laughter which your teammates loved had been replaced by a strained giggle and they could see you’d been putting pressure on yourself in every department.
Everything had to be perfect.
In the four days since your decision had been made public you’d received support from all your teammates but you could see they were also worried. Many of them had been here when you joined, they’d seen the aftermath and many of them had been your shoulder to lean on for months after.
Many of them watched on now as you retreated into your room, barely giving a second glance to the games currently taking place in the dining room, a tradition you were a usual member of the night before an away game.
Alexia and Mapi had noticed the changes just like everyone else, the three of you had a strong connection both on and off the pitch. Alexia had become an older sister figure to you and Mapi was your platonic soul mate. They knew your habits unlike anyone else and when the notebook you used for anxious tattoo scribblings had been out the entire journey to Mallorca it was clear your mind was elsewhere.
“You grab the pillows.”
“I’ll grab the blankets.”
The two of them scurried off to their own rooms, finding their entrusted items before meeting back at the door which they knew you would be behind. You wouldn’t have gone outside, your shy nature meant you struggled to have confidence in new cities, preferring to explore with others rather than alone as the sun went down.
Alexia knocked on the door, a moment of panic striking as they thought you weren’t going to answer before the door creaked open. Your wide-eyed figure stood in the crack, still in the tracksuit you’d travelled in rather than pyjamas.
“What’s going on?” The tree of you quite often spent the nights in each other’s hotel rooms, though those meetings were usually pre-planned.
Only you knew from the worried expressions on their faces this wasn’t a call to watch the latest film that had been released. “We’re worried about you.”
“I’m fine.”
You should have known that answer was never going to satisfy them. “Please can we come in.”
It wasn’t even worth trying to persuade them, not really. “Sure.” They couldn’t miss the sigh you let out as the door swung open. “Make yourself comfy.”
In the matter of minutes you’d gone from sprawling over the double bed alone to shuffling between the two players, being welcomed into the arms of Alexia as the three of you shuffled under the duvet.
“We’re worried about you.” MarÍa admitted, smoothing down the hair draped around your face. “What’s going on?”
“Nothing.”
“Are you sure because I bet if we looked in that notepad we’d find more anxious doodles than before. You’ve barely spoken two words to anyone since the news broke out.”
“I read an article-“
“Didn’t I tell you to stop that.” Alexia scolded you. “Those journalists don’t know anything about you.”
“But they don’t know that.” You argued back. “They’ll be reading about how ‘cocky’ I am on and off the pitch, how I flaunt my money, how I think I ‘own the team’.”
“If they believe that then they really have no eyes. Then they’ll see how you’re one of the shiest players on the team, they’ll learn how you could live in mansion but donate so much money to charity, they’ll see how much you work on the team as a whole. You do everything for football and they need to see that.”
“If they don’t love the person they’ll come to know then that’s on them.” Alexia agreed with her.
“Are you sure this isn’t about a certain blonde centre back?” MarÍa teasingly questioned you. “Maybe this isn’t about you being nervous about the articles and more about going into gay panic around Miss Williamson.”
“I told you that in confidence that you’d never bring it up again.” It was true, a few years ago you had confided in the two of them that you used to have a small (very large) crush on Leah at the time.
“And I’m tired of you being the third wheel in our flat, you’ve rejected every opportunity for me to set you up with one of my friends so now I have to think that it’s because you’re still pining for the girl.”
“I’m not pining for anyone, it was a stupid crush which has gone in the four years that I haven’t spoken to the girl.”
“Would you like to speak to her again?” Alexia asked.
“I mean obviously I’m going to have to, she’s the captain of the team.”
“Message her now.”
“No.”
“Why not?” I could only think of a million reasons why I wasn’t about to do that.
“Because like I said, I haven’t spoken to her in nearly four years and it would be weird for me to just message her the night before we see each other again.”
“So lets role play it then, you walk into the hotel tomorrow and she’s there, what are you going to say?” Alexia asked the question you’ve been asking yourself all week.
“Hi.”
Both of them looked like they wanted to tear out both their own and your hair. “Ok you can’t just say that.”
“What else do you want me to say?”
“How are you? Ask her about her life?”
“You want me to speak to the girl for the first time in years and ask her basically how she’s been since we went from speaking every day to unfollowing each other on social media and avoiding any chance of meeting since then.” You needed better friends in situations like this. “I’m not going heavy on our first conversation.”
“You will need to talk about.”
“I know but it’s not just her I need to have that conversation with, I was close with a lot of them and now I’m not. They should be just as involved in that conversation as Leah is.”
“Maybe you could design her a little tattoo, something like ‘I love Y/N’ on her forehead.” MarÍa teased you. “Matches your ‘I love Leah’ on your chest.”
“Shut up, just so you know I’ll never stop cockblocking you and Ingrid, I’ll be round for tea when I get back.”
“Bonnie told me she wants to live with me all the time by the way, said something about her mum abandoning her.”
“Fuck off MarÍa.”
….
The first person to reach out to you wasn’t exactly someone you expected. Mary Earps wasn’t exactly in your friendship group back in 2019, though because she was a part of that squad she was one of the players who you unfollowed in the following unfortunate events. You definitely therefore were not expecting to see her name pop up as you made your way through the airport, heading out to the car which would take you back to your parents’ house before you headed to the team hotel later on in the evening.
@1maryearps: See you later mate, we can’t wait to have you back x
Your emotions were so all over the place that maybe you should have expected this simple message to bring tears to your eyes. Maybe that meant you’d have at least one person on your side tonight.
You spent most of the meal with parents and siblings trying to do anything to avoid the thoughts about what was happening tonight coming back. You spoke to Harper about her homework, Cruze about his latest holiday and Romeo about his girlfriend. Brooklyn could almost sense your nervousness and kept up the conversation, which was all fine until you had to leave.
They knew how big this moment was and each gave you an individual goodbye before you got back into the car. As much as you would have liked to have taken your dad’s offer to drive you, this was all about being normal and being drove by David Beckham didn’t really give off that vibe.
You’d made this drive a million times before, only this time it seemed to take half the time and before you knew it the doors to St George’s Park were in view.
The only person in view was a single man holding a video camera, obviously preparing for the players’ arrivals This was hard and yet you knew this was probably the easiest step, he didn’t know you. You got out from the car, flashing a small smile to the camera as it trained on your every move, making sure to say a thank you to the driver, you turned to head inside.
“How are you feeling Y/N?” The camera man asked.
“Excited.” You couldn’t exactly tell him you were shaking inside. “I can’t wait to be back with this amazing team.”
“Two goals from you today….”
“All thanks to my teammates.” It was only the truth, you were basically set up for both goals by Aitana, you couldn’t do anything but put them in the back of the net.
“Good luck.”
“Thank you very much.”
If you were known for one thing it would be your punctuality, in fact you almost had a fear of being late. Maybe you’d done it on purpose this time to avoid greeting teammates in front of the camera but you were the first here judging by the table in the reception area being full of keys.
“Y/N it’s good to finally meet you in person.” Anja, one of the members of the England management team greeted you. “I hope you’re feeling well.”
“I’m glad to be here,” You settled for that. “I can’t wait to get back on that pitch now.”
“Well we’re glad to have you here. Here’s your key, we’ll meet in the dining area for a quick debrief at 8 and then you’ll have the night to yourself. Training schedules for the week are in your key pack.”
“Thank you.”
This place hadn’t changed one bit, from the entrance all the way up to your rooms you could trace the steps without even looking. You could hear noise out in the corridor but you stayed put, waiting for the clock to tick to 7:50 before making your way downstairs. With it being ten minutes early no one was there but Sarina and the coaching staff. Could this technically count as your first impression to them?
Their eyes trained on you as you entered the room. “Hey, thank you once again.”
“Stop saying thank you, this is all on you.” Sarina instructed, giving you a firm yet welcoming hug, an action which was repeated by the others. “Go and take a seat.”
“Thank-“ Maybe not. “Ok Sarina.”
You didn’t really know what to expect from the others, the squad was definitely a mixture of youth and experience. However even some of the more established players like Alessia and Ella were unknown to you on a personal level.
Thankfully maybe the first ones in were some of the younger players, Jess Park and Ebony Salmon were both the epitome of excitement as they entered the room saying a quick hello to the staff before slightly pausing when they found me sat on the first row.
“Hi.” You knew it was on you to make the effort. “It’s nice to meet you both.”
“Nice to meet you too.” Jess said taking the seat next to me. “You’re killing it at Barcelona.”
“Thank you, I’ve enjoyed watching you play this season. You’ll be an asset at city when you return.” You loved studying young players and watching their development. Jess was no difference in that, plus it helped to build up that connection on the team.
The volume in the room increased as more players entered. Some like Laura Coombs and Katie Zelem gave you a quick smile before taking their seats, other youngsters gave you a quick welcome.
The first real re-introduction you had was when Millie and Rachel entered, your eyes instantly connecting and it was Rachel who led the two of them over. You had always loved the two of them and almost let out a sigh of relief when they both greeted you with hugs, repeating how glad they were to see you. Lucy and Jordan followed suit, the two of them messing about and pulling you into a tight hug before taking their seats.
It was however the final people to enter the room that you were the most nervous about. Maybe you should have been thankful that when Keira, Georgia and Leah entered the room the meeting was about to start and all you could do was send a glancing look their way before Sarina had eyes on her.
She went through the logistics, just like happens every time before she got into the depths of the squad. “It would seem like this is the squad for reintroducing yourself. Laura hasn’t been with us since 2020 and Y/N in 2019. We just want everyone to remember that they’re here for a reason and we all play for England, we’re all a team.”
You blocked everything else out, vaguely scribbling down on your phone some notes about the timings and rooms you were needed in but it was all a bit of a blur. You took your time at the end speaking to some of the other girls, no-one seemed to be making a huge fuss about the situation but the trio had disappeared again and you knew you had to speak to them tonight before this started to interfere with the rest of the camp.
Thankfully you managed to find them, the three of them tucked away in the corner of the dining room, huddled around a laptop playing something in German.
“Hey.” Your voice almost cracked as you broke through the silence. “It’s good to see you all.”
You should have predicted really that Keira and Georgia would be your road in, though the two of them were fierce on the pitch they really were softies off it and you were almost knocked off your feet when they bounded up to you, both their arms wrapping around you in a hug.
“We can’t believe you’re actually here.” Georgia said. “This is just crazy.”
“It’s definitely different.” Leah finally joined in and that was the moment you knew even as she joined in the hug, she was the one who would be the toughest to crack. She wasn’t going to let you in just as easy but the captain part of her probably forced her to not let it show around others. “Glad to have you back on the team.”
“Thank you.”
“Take a seat.” Keira glanced to the free chair next to Leah. “We were just watching Georgia make a fool of herself, want to join?”
“Yeah I’d like that, I’d like that a lot.”
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01zfan · 1 day
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muscle memory | p. wb
waiter!wonbin x waitress!reader | 5.9k words
WONBIN ANON(S) THIS ONE IS FOR Y’ALL!
contains: random idols mentioned for world building, semi-public sex, unprotected sex
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you sat next to the pass waiting for the food you ordered for your table to be put out. it was ironically one of the few areas in the restaurant where you could gather your thoughts despite objectively being in the middle of all the chaos. this was the one place in the restaurant where you could actively see all moving parts in the restaurant coming together. next to the pass was also the personal dining room of you and your coworkers, the designated spot where discarded food was up for grabs. so you basked in the organized chaos of your restaurant while eating almost cold parmesan aioli fries.
from your seat on your barstool you could see the cooks in the open faced kitchen work preparing people’s food. you could see the fire coming to life in their woks, and how they didn’t flinch away. you could hear them yelling out terms and phrases to eachother about dishes. you perked up when you heard the items of the dish you were waiting for be called out. you looked down the line quickly, but went back to your slouching position when nothing you needed was there. 
you sat there eating the discarded food, half focused on putting something in your empty stomach while half focused on the sounds around you. you waited to hear the signature ding of a new dish being done, but all your ears could pick up was the sound of more tickets being printed and the low-volume music playing in the kitchen. if you got close enough enough and if it was loud enough you could sometimes recognize the words and sing along. you had built up a rapport with them that way, singing along to their songs and passing along compliments from the customers. when they were feeling generous enough, they would even prioritize your staff meal and actually make your on the fly items quickly.
you couldn’t decipher the song in the kitchen. it was drowned out by the million other sounds happening around you. you heard your fellow server yelling into the kitchen about something being made wrong. you looked up to see it was giselle, nearly sitting on the pass to lean as far as she could into the kitchen. any argument she tried to start failed. you knew it would be forgotten after closing, but in the moment it seemed intense. curses were being thrown over the wall on both sides and made it down the line. you wondered if you would have to call for shotaro to mediate the situation, but everyone seemed unbothered as they continued with their job. in less than a minute, giselle was handed her food and she had a smile on her face as she made her way back to the dining room. after seeing the exchange, all you could do was shake you head and go back to your fries.
you had learned a long time ago to stand off to the side when altercations happen. you only recently got in the good graces of most the people you worked with. the last thing you needed was to be put on someone’s shit list for rightfully asking for your food to be ready, or to ask them to calm down.
that was a big problem you developed working here. becoming fine with getting the short end of the stick. if anton sat a seven-top, two five-tops, and three two-tops in your section you only smiled and nodded your head. if someone asked you to come in for them even if you didn’t want to, you said yes. if one of your coworkers asked for your helped even if you were swamped you ran twice as fast to make sure you could save them. you never dared to yell, stomp your feet, or say no. you took it as penance for no other reason than simply existing. you knew everyone was aware of your pushover personality, you just hoped eventually they would give you grace.
normally, you would’ve set your foot down by now, at the very least set up boundaries for your coworkers on what they could ask for. you practiced the speech a million times, each one unique to the unfair things your coworkers would ask for. anton it would be about sitting too many big parties in your section. giselle would be how she rushes too much. winter would be about her laziness when it comes to being on the pass. sungchan’s would be that he helps too much, making you feel inferior at your job. but you keep it all at bay for penance, to make yourself pay for how you unfairly judged your perfect coworker.
you had been hired at the company two months ago. it was hard to navigate at first, having to swallow your pride from not finding a job in your career field. any shame you felt melted after hearing their were multiple “young professionals” at your job. you were even more excited to hear that there was actually someone else with the exact same degree as you, and seemingly went to the same school as you. before you could ask any questions the interview went on, and any questions about other people cleared your mind when you got the job.
when wonbin almost ran into you on your first day, you dropped all of your drinks. it came as a surprise, seeing a face you hadn’t seen in so long. he was different, his black hair that never touched his ears went past his chin now, and he was faster on his feet. he also was the apodeictic leader of the waitstaff, earned through his lack of mistakes, ability to speak his mind, and being a guest favorite. in that moment it became clear who the person that had the same major as you was, and it was too late to quit. you had gotten a taste for the money, and this was the only job on the market that would hire you. 
so you stuck through it, swallowing your pride each time wonbin helped you correct a mistake or appease an angry customer. you were grateful for the help, and to have someone who knew what they were doing by your side. something would randomly hit you like a pang in your chest realizing wonbin was better at this than you. all the times you bested him in school seemed to pale in comparison to this, something that actually mattered.
while you were with your trainer sungchan you were distracted, keeping an eye out for wonbin so you could ignore his gaze. what bothered you even more was the fact that wonbin was unbothered. with an exception for the first time he saw you, everything was business as usual with him. he was nothing like the wonbin you used to know, who was petty and didn’t let things go. this wonbin didn’t bring up your past to you or anyone who asked how you two knew eachother. this wonbin only simply said you two went to school together, greatly undermining the time you two together. 
working with wonbin took weeks to get used to. they were slow steps forward, finally making it out of the initial awkwardness to exchange pleasantries. 
you finally were able to have a conversation with your coworkers while wonbin was present. before you would simply go silent when he came around, avoiding eye contact when he would ask you a question directly. 
the conversation was what it normally was during slow mornings, complaints regarding work. you had to spend a ridiculous amount of money on the uniform with no help from upper levels of management. sungchan and giselle shared your complaints, even talking about how later down the line you would have to pay for dry cleaning.
“what would you suggest to fix the situation?” wonbin asked.
it was a question directed at you, unavoidable as wonbin titled his head. you thought for a moment before keeping eye contact with wonbin.
“they could have designated days of the month where they take all of our stuff to dry clean for cheap.” you reasoned.
you felt your heart pound in your chest as you held eye contact with wonbin. you were expecting a rebuttal from him, from anyone before you saw sungchan nod his head.
“there’s discounts for bulk at that place a couple blocks down.” giselle said.
“they could also pay us for buying parts of our uniform.” you added on.
”that would be a dream.” sungchan said.
all of you nodded in agreement before dispersing to get back to your jobs. wonbin hesitated for a second, and your own steps faltered. but he only cleared his throat and went his separate way to tend to a newly sat table.
within two says, there was a list pinned to the corkboard wall for dry cleaning. three times a month, designated days were listed neatly. you already saw a few names, wonbin’s at the very top. you also saw a stack of new waiter aprons and a request sheet to fill out for missing or replacement uniform pieces. you looked around in the break room, feeling angry burn in your chest and eyes. you were hostile the rest of the day, taking it out of your coworkers and customers that were snappy to you first. you didn’t let it out until you caught wonbin in the back of house, sitting in the managers chair as he collected his tips. the anger surged through your fingertips and your feet, causing you to stomp into the room.
“really wonbin?” you called out.
he seemed confused, looking up from his money to your frown.
“what?” wonbin asked.
“i get that this is the first time in your life probably being in a higher up position, but that doesn’t give you the right to claim them as your own.” you quietly yelled.
wonbin sat in the chair, staring at you in shock while your chest finally loosened. the shock and confusion was replaced anger of his own, and you could see wonbin take a deep breath before leaning back in the chair. he looked at you with a calm and even expression now, your exact opposite. he turned in his chair to go back to counting the money.
“i see you haven’t changed one bit.” he said simply.
somehow, that hit you harder than any insult could’ve. it had you averting your gaze from wonbin again, focusing on stacks of paper and the sound of the printer. he said nothing else to you, just letting you bask in the shame of your anger. 
when you turned tail to leave you were face to face with a manager, thanking you for your smart idea about the dry cleaning.
“hands please!” winter yelled down the pass.
you snapped up from the barstool, swallowing the week old memory and the stale food so fast it felt like a lump in your throat. you wiped your face with the back of your hand before using a wet napkin to clean your fingers. 
you made a straight line for winter working on expo while pinching your server apron between your fingers to dry them. winter’s piercing voice was like a bat signal for the servers, when she spoke suddenly everyone was there. sohee pushed open the two-way door from the kitchen to come to her, with sungchan trailing close behind. eunseok and seunghan were lucky they didn’t have to worry about friday nights, but they had their own personal hell on sunday mornings. 
winter handed off everyone’s dishes one by one. you saw more and more people rush off as they had the orders they needed. you waited patiently for winter to hand you the plates. 
by the time almost everyone else was gone, you were left with your ungarnished plates.
“i’m swamped, and desserts are coming out soon. can you finish this off for me?” winter asked.
winter posed it as a question and you knew you could say no, but it felt like an order. she barely finished her sentence before she was moving back down the pass, tearing the tickets off to impale them on the metal spindle next to your fries. the pass was empty, and winter relaxed on the barstool to eat your food. 
your response to winter sat at the tip of your tongue. your stomach growled, and you started to imagine your tables waiting for their food. were they hungry like you were while you watched winter scarf down the rest of your fries? you could’ve told winter no, to tell her to do your job like you had to do yours. but when you saw wonbin coming to the pass from the dining room you bit your tongue before turning to your plates to garnish. 
wonbin saw you finishing the plating. he had empty plates in his hand and was making a path for the dishwasher, but you garnishing your dishes stopped him dead in his tracks. he turned to look at and winter quickly turned to look at him, getting up from her seat to try and look busy working. he saw right through it, tilting his head as she looked at the blank computer screen.
“really winter?” wonbin said.
she quickly shrugged and her eyes got wide to defend herself.
“she doesn’t mind.” she said defensively.
wonbin got a little closer, trying not to make his voice heard.
“she has three large parties all sat within five minutes of eachother. you should do your job so she can do hers.” he said.
winter’s eyes softened sympathetically when wonbin told her about the amount of people. she nodded her head and wonbin headed off to the back of house. he passed by you while you finished your final dish, not sparing you a second glance.
you strategically placed the dishes on the bigger black plate, hoisting it off the pass to rest it on your shoulder. you stole a glance at wonbin for a second, and you could see his eyes dart to the amount of food balancing on your shoulder. the food to feed your seven-top weighed down on you, but you had to start getting the food out now to give yourself grace for the five-top. you could feel winter’s eyes on you as you slowly found the right position for the plate. you turned and started heading for the dining room when you saw sungchan heading straight towards you.
before you could head to the dining room with your food, winter called out to you.
“i have to get this food out to my table.” you said as politely as possible.
“i’ll garnish for the rest of the night. sorry about that.” winter apologized.
the food started to hurt your shoulder, but the acknowledgement and apology from winter made the food feel a little lighter. you nodded your head thankfully before turning back to the dining room. 
the rest of the dinner rush went as expected. things went wrong, you had to be bailed out, you had to bail others out. you got tipped well sometimes but got tipped the worst for the bigger parties. you wore yourself ragged jumping up and down for the customers and your coworkers. you ended up staying behind to do opening duties, something that should’ve been reserved for the openers. you were the last of the waitstaff to leave, saying a goodbye to your manager as he locked the door behind you.
when you finally left through the back door into the parking lot, your shift was nearly eleven hours. a quarter after one, calculating your route home made your slippers drag across the paved parking lot as you made your way to your car. you could feel some gravel find its way between the slipper and your foot. the small sharp rock poked through your sock and was stabbed against your foot, but you didn’t care. it paled in comparison to the pain of being on your feet all day. maybe the acupuncture could relieve some of the stress that weighed down on your shoulders.
the sound of your car waking up to you pressing the unlock button distracted you from wonbin on the other side of the parking lot. it wasn’t until he rolled down his manual windows and called out your name that you saw he was there. you have to blink a few times to realize who it was. exhaustion made your eyes droop and a little blurry. when your vision focussed you saw he was beckoning you to come to him. you looked at your car, so ready for you to get inside and drive home. but the guilt your situation carried your tired legs to wonbin’s car. he motioned you to the passenger side. you pulled on the lock handle once, and after wonbin let out an evil giggle he unlocked the door.
you sat quietly in the passenger seat, listening to the quiet music in wonbin’s car. you were only illuminated by the lamppost in the parking lot and the small light in the front seat. you stared straight ahead, awkwardly sitting upright waiting for wonbin to say what he needed to say. his thumbs tapped on his steering wheel, trying to get out what he needed to say.
“you’re overworked.” he said.
you scoffed and shook your hair lightly. you pressed a finger to your temple and turned to look outside.
“everyone is overworked.” you say.
“you are taking on a bigger workload for no reason.” you kept your head turned outside, desperately trying to ignore the caring tone in wonbin’s voice. “just because someone tells you to do something, doesn’t mean you have to.” he says.
“i do it because i want to.” you say quietly.
now it’s wonbin’s turn to scoff at you. you turn your head and narrow your eyebrows.
“what?” you say defensively.
“you want to garnish your own dishes when you have two five-tops and a seven-top waiting on their food?” wonbin asked you a question, but didn’t wait for your answer before shaking his head “give me a break.” he said.
you clench your hands at your sides, trying desperately to remain calm. but wonbin finds ways to push your buttons, found ways to make you so mad. the fake worry, the way he watched your every move without you knowing, the way he was right. 
“it’s none of your business what i do.” you said. 
“are you just going to keep letting everyone boss you around? do you plan on ever standing up for yourself?” he said.
wonbin had let of of the steering wheel, using his hands to argue with you like he always used to do. you cross your arms into your chest and tilt your head condescendingly.
“you don’t know anything.” you sneer.
“i know you’re making yourself suffer for no reason.” wonbin takes off his beanie, running a stressed hand through his hair. you keep your eye on his hand after sparing a glance to how his hair falls perfectly on his face. “is it because you thought i stole your ideas? so you just don’t advocate for yourself anymore?” he asked.
the incident hadn’t been brought up by either of you since it transpired. you half hoped he would’ve forgotten, but you knew wonbin always remembered. you had to pretend like you didn’t care when you shook your head, turning to look out the window.
“i don’t know what you’re talking about.” you lied.
“oh okay.” wonbin laughed. “just because you think we still have childish beef from college doesn’t mean you get to act the way you do.”
“i’m just not used to you being better than me at things.” you say.
it’s a challenge, the way you look at wonbin from your relaxed position on the door. you let your eyes go over his face a million times, resting on his lips after you lick yours. you almost forgot about the rush you got with pushing wonbin’s buttons. the feeling was freeing after a long day of running around for other people all day without saying a single smart remark. 
wonbin thinks about the type of person he is now. he thinks about how you two have been in this situation before, with you baiting him. you looked at him the same way you did now. back then he perceived the look in your eye as combative. but now, realization dawned on him. how he had never noticed before was beyond him. his eyes got wide as you leaned in with a smirk on your face. wonbin is timid, refusing to let his mind do something he might regret.
you the one that closes the space between you and wonbin by coming over the center console. you linger there for a second, waiting for his hand to come to your neck before you pull away.
”i’m not sorry by the way,” you brush hair out of wonbin’s face. “you should’ve told you were going to do that before you did it.” you say.
wonbin nods his head, completely giving up any argument he could’ve had with you. your smile is bright—you’ve bested him at another thing.
“i’ll do whatever you want.” he said.
you smiled before going back to wonbin’s lips. his hand on the back of your neck kept you in place, and his tilting head forced you to let him take the lead. you fought for it back through an iron grip on his shirt, pulling him forward. 
wonbin settled for letting you stick your tongue in his mouth to let his hand wander your body. he rested over your chest, lightly squeezing your breasts before moving down to your hips. he pulled you forward slightly, a hand underneath your ass lifting for from your seat. you pull away and sigh. wonbin looks at your expectantly, and you let him worry for just a moment before clearing the center console with your legs and straddling him.
“you’re still bossy.” you said matter-of-factly.
“you know, i’m technically not your boss.” wonbin said. 
he waited to say it until after his lips were already glossy with your spit and you were straddling his lap. even if whatever you were going to end up doing to wonbin wasn’t allowed, you were too far in now to back down. nothing he said would’ve stopped you from working the buttons on his shirt, or his hands that cupped your chest.
“we can’t get in trouble for whatever we do.” wonbin continued.
he looked up from your chest to look at you. he let your hand go to the buttons on his shirt before he went to yours. it was deliberate and slow, each button made the tension in the car go up. your shirts weren’t even undone all the way before your lips clashed together again. 
the kisses were messy like they always were. both of your tongues were mingling, the wet muscles causing a mess on the corner of your lips. the sound of spit being swapped filled the car, and wt kisses cooled the heating skin of your faces. your hands gripped wonbin’s shoulders, and his hand went to your pants. the button was stubborn and wonbin got no help from his shaky hands. it took entirely too long to get your pants open enough for wonbin to plunge his hand underneath the waistband of your panties.
instantly, wonbin almost cursed at your desperation. you were so wet the fabric of your underwear stuck to your folds. he wasted no time slowly sliding a finger into your heat, his eyes focused on your face when he made it to the knuckle. he put his second finger in a little faster, bending them when you brought his lips back in for a kiss. 
by the time wonbin put his third finger in your kisses devolved to sucking on his bottom lip. the way you were rutting your hips against his hand and gripping his bicep to keep his hand in place. wonbin watched you use him, unbothered by your desperation. seeing you get wound up so easily and hearing a quiet song about being all alone and needing someone made his dick twitch in his pants.
“been awhile?” wonbin asked.
wonbin’s words were laced with amazement, half talking about himself. the lewd wet sounds and whimpers from you both were already filling up the small space of his car. he was trying to make you feel better while you were still defensive. something in your mind still convincing you everything wonbin said was meant to be sarcastic, even if his pupils were blown wide looking at you.
“shut up.” you whine.
your whiny voice made your words bite less, and the way your hole fluttered around his fingers made wonbin want to keep going. he brought a hand behind your back to pull you further onto his lap. you pressed your chest against wonbin’s, still helplessly rocking your hips into his hand while whimpering into the crook of his neck. he cooed at you and gripped your side to keep you in place. it was the same bruising grip he would have on you in the relationship, one that he would always look at in pride the next morning. 
his fingers pushed inside of you at a skilled pace, wonbin would have to pat himself on the back for keeping such a steady groove while he was getting needier by the second. too many times in your relationship he would get lost and chase his own pleasure, going to fast for your liking. but wonbin was matured now, he changed. he could finger you at a pace that made you want more instead of giving you too much, and he could hit the spots you used to like despite the awkward angling in his car. he bent his fingers, smirking to himself when he could feel your body tense.
“fuck.” you moaned into his neck.
you reached out a tongue to lick the hot skin of wonbins neck. he preened closer to your mouth, the only hint he would drop that he wanted you to mark him like old times.
wonbin figured you got the hint, because a desperate hand pushed down his work uniform to uncover previously hidden parts of his neck and chest. your eyes scanned for a second, trying to figure out how high your marks could go while still being hidden. you went for a place on his collarbone and your lips found the perfect spot as if from muscle memory.
“no one will see.” wonbin said. 
his hands went to your ass, groping you over the fabric of your pants. he wedged one hand into your pants, reaching all the way down until he could get a handful of you. 
you continued sucking on his skin as your hands went down to the tent in wonbin’s pants. you moved so hasty that you didn’t bother with the button. all you did was unzip his pants before reaching into the fly of his underwear to grab his dick. wonbin hiss as he bucked his hips into your hand. his tip was angry and red, glossy from the precum that seemed never ending. his dick sat upright and fit perfectly into your fist. 
you wasted no time running your hand up and down wonbin’s length, the sound echoing off the walls in his car. wonbin started sucking on the exposed skin of your chest and laving any area his tongue could reach. you let your body lean back, a spare hand moving your shirt to expose more skin to wonbin. his hands started at your hips and worked their way up, grabbing anything he could. when wonbin got to the nape of your neck he pulled you in for a kiss. desperation from only getting chaste kisses turned to you pumping wonbin’s length faster. he continued to kiss you softly, hissing when the teeth of his zipper rubbed against his sensitive skin.
“does it hurt?” you asked breathlessly.
wonbin nods, reaching for the button of his pants. your shaking hands work together to unbutton the top, and you lift yourself up so wonbin can slide his pants halfway down his thighs.
you two look so pitiful, clothes only half off with forming bruises on your skin. the two of you were breathless only from making out and close to climaxing only from feeling eachother up. you almost forgot you were in the empty parking lot of your job, acting like a reckless horny teenager. if you had half a mind you would’ve gotten dressed and driven home to get ready for your shift tomorrow. but wonbin’s swollen lips called to you, and his dick twitched in your hand without you doing anything. you felt like you were wearing too many clothes and wonbin’s front seat gave you no space.
“should we go to the backseat?” wonbin asked.
you crawled over the center console a little to quickly. you laid down in the backseat, lifting your hips to take off your slacks and panties while wonbin put the driver seat back up. you kicked off your shoes and socks, putting them in the space behind your seat. your button up and bra followed, leaving you completely naked in wonbin’s backseat. 
the situation barely had time to settle before wonbin was naked and following you to the back. 
“how do you want it?” wonbin asked.
“i don’t know what position is best for car sex.” you said.
you forgot to lace your voice with sarcasm, or something sharp to show wonbin you were still mad. the words only came out whiny, putting a smile on wonbin’s face.
“just tell me what you want,” he runs a finger over the mark on your chest. “it’ll be a nice change of pace for you.” he smiles.
“you’re an asshole.” you said.
you roll your eyes before turning around. wonbin moves back, trying to give you the amount of space you need to get into your position. wonbin knew that you would put your ass up and spread your legs far enough where wonbin could slot between them. he helped you, moving your foot to plant on the floor in front of his so you could find more stability.
”spit” wonbin ordered. 
his hand was underneath your mouth, and you gathered the saliva in your mouth to fall into his palm. wonbin’s hand retreated, and you could hear the sound of him spitting and his hand running up and down his dick.
“i haven’t done this in a long time.” wonbin tells you.
wonbin’s wet hand presses on your ass to bring you down slightly. when you hear him moving forward behind you and his tip prods at your entrance, you feel yourself getting lightheaded. the feeling almost makes you forget that you have to atleast try to be a little responsible. 
“me neither. but you have to pull out.” you say.
“okay baby.” wonbin says behind you.
“i’m not your baby,” you almost recant your statement when wonbin pushes inside of you. “oh my god.” you moan.
“holy shit.” wonbin curses.
he’s still inside of you when he bottoms out. your walls waste no time clamping around him, almost like they’re trying to keep him inside of you. it’s blinding, and your body tries to adjust to the feeling of wonbin being inside of you again. you barely get used to the stretch before wonbin pulls out and pushes in again.
“so perfect. fits so perfect.” wonbin says.
you can only nod and whimper in agreement when he pushes in again. wonbin’s other hand presses to the side of your ass, spreading both cheeks. something so simple has you feeling something completely different. your whimpers turn you both into moaning messes as wonbin starts thrusting into your spread cunt. your skin is clammy, and wonbin’s hips start pressing against your ass faster and faster. you had to place a hand on the door in front of you for stability. when you tried pushing your hips back to meet wonbin’s he moaned behind you.
“i got you.” he said absentmindedly.
you reacted by reaching your other hand back, reaching for any part of him. wonbin gave you his hand, and then leaned forward to press his sweaty chest to your back. 
“wonbin.” you cried.
“i know. i know.” he cooed.
wonbin wrapped his hand around your body, bringing his fingers down to your clit. you could feel his breath hot on the shell of your ear, and you could hear the sounds the sounds he stopped trying to contain. you lifted your back up slightly to be completely pressed against wonbin, so closed you could feel his heart thudding against your back. he sucked on your shoulder blades and let go of your hand wedged between your two bodies to place it over the hand on the door.
“are you close?” wonbin whispered into your ear.
“yes. so close.” you said.
wonbin continued his revolutions on your clit, and started rutting his hips into yours. he was close too, and it took everything in him to not lose himself then and there.
“kiss me baby.” wonbin nearly begged.
you didn’t have to be asked twice to turn your head as far as it would go. wonbin caught your lips hurriedly, placing kisses to your jaw and cheek before kissing your lips successfully. he was overstimulating you both, becoming distracted between all the ways you touched. the fogged windows of his car only made everything worse, heat just circling the area between you two. 
you completely froze and no longer kissed wonbin back when you came. it was too hard to focus, each time your walls clamped around wonbin’s dick made you whine out helplessly. you wanted to cry when wonbin pulled away from your body to pull out. your sweat cooling on your ass and back mixed with wonbin’s hot cum. he moaned and pumped his length. he finally letting himself quickly rub at your clit to match the pace of his hand on himself. he kept going, long after the ropes stopped, trying to prolong the feeling of you both experiencing your highs together. 
wonbin didn’t pull his hands away until your legs shook and a weak hand pushed his away. your ass went lower and lower and you said nothing while you caught your breath. 
wonbin went to the center console of his car, opening it up to pull out napkins from his various takeout orders. he was delicate wiping himself from your back despite wishing he could keep it there forever. you murmured a tired thank you, still in your resting position. wonbin let himself slump into the seat after he cleaned you up, still trying to catch his breath as he pulled up his underwear. he looked at his foggy windows, then to you. wonbin let himself run his hands down the line of your back before affectionately tapping your butt.
“are you alright?” wonbin asked.
your moved from your spot, back on the seat to get more comfortable. wonbin could see sleep pull at your eyelids as you slowly nodded.
“tired.” you said simply. 
wonbin nodded knowingly, moving your body so your head rested on his lap. it wasn’t long before your eyes closed all the way, muttering something about giving you ten minutes.
“go ahead.” wonbin ran his hands over creases of your face soothingly. “you got time.” he said
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astridthevalkyrie · 3 days
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xavier thinks you're cruel when you smile. everything about you is different, to the point where it feels like you're just a whole different person sharing the same face as the woman he knew. but then, when he met you as a lightseeker, he'd thought the same thing, that you were nothing like his best friend who didn't have any grand dreams of becoming a grandis knight, and only thought of living today to the fullest because she knew she would not see tomorrow. and then he'd fallen for the woman sacrificing her blood, sweat and tears just so that she could be claimed as his. and as predicted, he's fallen for you for the third time now, and he realizes that your personality could change a million times over a million lives, and he will love you more and more each time he meets you. because no matter what you do and no matter what you are trying to be, your smile blinds him each and every time. and that is what he finds cruel, because it must be cruel to make him fall for that smile again and again and again, and surely there is a limit to how many people one man can fall in love with. perhaps he's the exception, or perhaps it doesn't count because you are still one person. either way, it is torture, torture in its sweetest form that he could never hate you for, because you are not actually cruel, you are far kinder than he deserves.
"mister deepspace hunter," you sing, poking his cheek with a chicken plushie, "you can't sleep, we've only seen two movies."
"how many more are there?"
"three more in this series, and then we start the next fantasy series."
"you're insane," he says sweetly, burrowing further under your favorite blanket.
with a giggle, you lay your head down on his lap, hair splayed out on what he deems is your rightful pillow. "it's not a movie night if we don't stay up the whole night."
he's about to tell you that both of you need sleep, that it's not healthy to stay up this late or to pull all-nighters, but then he gazes down to where you're grinning up at him, and his heart stops for a second, because you are so, so, so beautiful, and he's gone.
sleep can wait another day.
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zayne thinks you're cruel when you speak. you are reserved around him, and while he never thinks you should limit yourself, least of all on his behalf, maybe this is the most merciful path you can take. because once you do start speaking, once you place your hand over his across whichever table at whichever restaurant to go off on an excited ramble about your latest endeavor, everything else fades way. and it is cruel, to make him lose control all of all senses aside from sound. it is cruel to metaphorically force him on his knees to bend and dance to the sound of your voice and your voice alone. it leaves him vulnerable, to pain, to betrayal, to any and every harmful thing that could possibly be surrounding him, when he cannot observe, when he cannot fight, when he cannot be, while you are speaking. when every individual word you speak has its own unique significance, and he would not be able to kill anyone who interrupts you because he would not even realize it happened, too entranced by the spell you cast. he is not his own in those moments, he only belongs to you. and thankfully, nothing does befall him, because you are not actually cruel, you are far kinder than he deserves.
"what do you think?"
he pauses, hand in yours as the two of you walk, blinking at you a few times. "what do i think?"
"yeah, you, doctor," you tease, squeezing his fingers. "what do you think? i've been talking your head off for five minutes."
he is not jarred because he hadn't been paying attention, on the contrary he'd been hanging off your every word. his opinion simply does not matter as much in his eyes.
"i agree with you," he says, enjoying the way you beam at his concurrence, "but what did you think about the other article?"
predictably, you take the bait and launch into another long rant, and he wills this topic to last forever.
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rafayel thinks you're cruel when you sleep. so, so soundly you sleep, sometimes in his own bed because he offers it to you like a fool. you look beautiful when you sleep, which is half the problem, and he knows that it is all sorts of wrong to find you beautiful when he's also paralyzed because of how similar your appearance is to death. from a distance, he could never tell the difference. it is only when he is next to you, holding your slack wrist in his hands, that he can breathe easier by pressing his fingers to your pulse. and he is terrified that one day he won't feel it, because it has happened before. one moment you were there, alive and well and his, and the next you were in his arms, lifeless and limp and somehow still beautiful. so there is no way for him to calm his racing heart when he sees you asleep, and the reason it's cruel is because he knows he cannot disturb you. not you, who works so hard and needs your sleep more than anyone else. he cannot ask you to sit up and breathe and laugh and show him that you're still alive. even though he knows you would should he ask, because you are not actually cruel, you are far kinder than he deserves.
"hmm." your eyes are bleary as they blink awake, hardly aware of where you are.
he slides his arms around you from behind, hiding his face in your neck. "you can go back to sleep, was just making sure you were still alive."
a quiet huff escapes you, clearly annoyed at being woken up for such a ludicrous reason. "don't be annoying."
he wasn't trying to be, this time. "okay," he whispers, "sorry."
you turn all of a sudden, shifting in his arms until you're facing him, with a light glare. another apology is on his lips when you crossly tell him, "i was kidding. you're not annoying."
"i can be. sometimes," he admits softly.
"no." you press a deep kiss to his lips, and he understands now why some humans would rather choose to drown under the sea instead of going back to the surface. "you're not annoying. you're never annoying. i love you. okay?"
his voice is choked the next time he speaks, with your face hidden in his neck, soft puffs of air on his neck letting him know that you're still breathing. a tear runs down his cheek.
"okay."
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parkerslatte · 3 days
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Dance of Affection (Medieval!AU)
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Azriel x Fem!Reader
Content Warnings: attempted SA. sexism. class differences. blood and injury. mild violence. smut.
Summary: Y/N works as a servant at Prythian Castle. Ever since she was born, she knew working for the Royal Family was her destiny. Her mother and father were a servant and stablehand respectively before their passing. Left alone, Y/N works as much as she can to earn money to get out of the castle walls. She longs for a life of adventure.
One day while attending to her daily duties, Y/N is cornered by one of the King’s bastard son’s and barely gets away. She is paid off to not say anything. Reluctantly, Y/N takes the money as it helps her toward her dream goal of leaving the confines of the castle.
Not long after this encounter, Y/N runs into Prince Azriel, heir to the throne. Of course she expects him to be as frightening as the other members of the Royal Family. But he is quite the opposite. While intimidating in stature, his personality is quiet and kind. An unexpected friendship ignites between the two. And that friendship eventually turns into more. There is only one issue— Azriel’s betrothed, Princess Elain.
Both Y/N and Azriel will need to overcome their complicated feelings for one another if the future of the kingdom will continue to live on. But the more Y/N thinks, the more unrealistic her feelings become. After all, she is a servant and Azriel is the future king. Their relationship should have never made any sense, yet it is all the other craves.
Current Word Count: N/A
A Court of Thorns and Roses Masterlist
•••
Contents:
Part One
Part Two
Part Three
Part Four
Part Five
Part Six
Part Seven
Part Eight
Epilogue
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A/N: Thank you @thalia-as-blog for this incredible idea! Originally it was only going to be an extended oneshot, but the more I thought on the idea, the more I wanted to make it into a series! So here it is!
I aim for it to have around nine parts (including an epilogue) but this could change as I am writing. If you would like to be added to the Taglist, please respond to this post or send me a message :)
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kathaynesart · 3 days
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If Leo can defeat his enemies easily by using the 'Portal Chop' move, wouldn't that mean he'll actually be the #1 priority for the whole Krang to kill when they spotted him? Even more so motivated to use their abilities to remove his ninpo to get rid of a 'bump on the road'?
Hehehe I’m glad someone asked! Yes he and his brothers are on the Krang’s most wanted list. But here’s the thing: only a few Krang are actually capable of sealing off mystic energy/ninpo. Specifically Krang 1. This is because there are different types of Krang with very different abilities (details under the cut).
To answer your question plainly, since Krang 1 is one of the few that can seal off the Ninpo powers, that has left the two sides at a stale mate. The turtles are DANGEROUS, and could do some lethal damage to Krang 1, but if Krang 1 gets the drop on them it’s all over for the turtles. Both sides KNOW this. What’s more I’ve given Krang 1 a weakness that he can only use this ability every so often. So he’d need to get the brothers all together in one fell swoop otherwise it leaves him vulnerable. For this reason the brothers seldom fight as all full set when in close proximity to him (another reason why Donnie normally stays back at HQ).
So we’ll have to wait and see how that pans out. Hope that answered your question. For those interested in the Krang types you can check out my ramblings under the cut:
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KRANG TYPES:
Sister Krang is a Brawler Type. She’s the most violent of the three, the strongest outside of her mech, and can keep going even after receiving a number of life threatening hits.
Brother Krang is an Infester Type. He can only speak through the people he’s infested, is physically weak, and goes down easily in battle. However he’s considered far more dangerous because of his ability to easily infest and transform prey to become part of the Krang hive mind. Infesters are also the tech crew and are best suited to drive the ships.
Krang 1 is a Prime Type, the rarest and most well rounded of the three. He has the brains and the brawn. Master tactician who can read the minds of his prey. He’s a powerful fighter (especially in his mech), and is able to use his connection to Empyrean to seal off mystic abilities such as Ninpo. While the Krang is considered a hive mind the Prime is the one in the driver seat as well as the “face man.” Normally there is only one or two Prime Types at a time.
From these three I’ve spawned several more types (including the Fighter type that end up killing Leo in the end) but I’ll save that for a proper Krang hierarchy post in the future.
If you’ve gotten this far thanks for reading my TED Talk.
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ovaryacted · 14 hours
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Really random but dad bod DI Leon🤤🤤🤤 (I really love DI Leon if you couldn’t tell) like I love Leon w abs, and his hourglass shape but just him cuddling w you and being so warm and soft😢 (or when y’all are making love and his tummy just has us fitting together like puzzle pieces and it’s LIKE OMGMGM😭😭😭😭😭)
-🐏
cw: descriptions of body changes, internalized fatphobia, smutty thoughts/acts.
OHHHHHH DAD BOD LEON IS MY VICE PLEASE OH MY FUCKING GOD. LIKE RAHHHH, I NEED IT BAD. Ram anon, I'm on to you.
The changes happen after a year into his forced retirement, he doesn't realize it until he becomes more aware of the way your arms feel wrapping around his soft torso. Once adorned with hard muscle, his body now was covered in a layer of skin that expanded over time. He still had the same physique and the same capacity for strength, but there was an added softness he’d acquired recently that sent his head in for a spin.
Retirement has been good for Leon, he no longer has to deal with the hecticness of mission briefings and assignments. He gets to actually rest, his usual overactive nervous system now rendered down and becoming more manageable. The first couple of weeks he spent falling asleep in bed or on the couch, like his body was playing catchup on the energy that's been robbed from him over the years. You didn’t bother him about it, didn’t even judge him whenever you’d find him limp on the bed and snoring in the middle of the day.
You'd use that time to run errands or do chores around your shared home, often preparing meals for him whenever he'd wake up groggily to go look for you. Eating homemade meals that were made with love certainly started to add up, the consistent intake of food was new and apparently something that his body liked and needed. The constant nausea he often experienced when he was under so much stress went away, slowly learned how to enjoy eating again like he did years before he was forced to become an agent.
He never focused on his appearance most days, but as Leon stopped to observe himself in the mirror one morning, his eyes were fixated on his body. He's certainly changed after a while, stomach a little fuller and cheeks more plump than before, hell even his arms and thighs looked bigger. His initial reaction to the change would have been disgust, to put himself back on a routine to regain the muscle he's lost and to critique every imperfection that would eventually be another nuisance.
But as he looked at himself a little longer, a smile crept up on his face, not minding what he saw for probably the first time in his life. All he saw was your love for him, how the signs of you taking care of him after all this time were starting to reflect in how he looked. He was healthy, he was alive, and that was a win in his book.
You certainly didn't mind the changes either and took every opportunity to remind Leon of just how much you adored him. Cuddling him whenever you could was something that became a ritual between the two of you, sneaking under his arm and digging your face into his chest any chance you got. He was soft, warm, and just a tad bit squishy. He was human, he was himself, not some war machine meant to work like a dog day and night.
One of your favorite things about his new appearance was the intimate moments you both shared and how he felt around you both internally and externally. You loved getting on your knees and worshipping him, sucking over his cock lavishly and running your hands over his thick thighs, biting at them when Leon found himself lost in pleasure.
Or when you were riding him and the sound of his thighs slapping against yours was louder than before, his lower tummy rubbing into you, meshing together so well one would think you were part of the same whole. It made you feral, like a primal instinct to claim him and show him that all you wanted was to make him feel accepted in this new body. Leon didn't complain, he loved how your attraction to him seemed to skyrocket.
Maybe being a bit more soft wasn't so bad after all.
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space-matt · 16 hours
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Could I request a Matt x reader.They have been dating for a while but the reader has never left that honey moon stage.One day Matt is not having a good day and the readers presence make him on edge.He ends up blowing up on her calling her overbearing and clingy.Things shift and she becomes more distant,for a while he feels ok but he starts to miss the relationship they way it was before.when he tries to talk to the reader she cries to him about the whole situation.He is really sorry and does his best to make it up to her.
I’ll make it up to you 
matt.sturniolo x fem.reader
summary: It's really true that you understand the value of things when you lose them.. Matt figured it out too late, but will he be able to make up for it?
request: yes 
author’s note: thank u so much for the request!! I hope you’ll enjoy it ♡ I add the song that helped me to write it. For everything I’m here!
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Still lying in bed you feel the heat coming from the window left half open in Matt’s room, with your eyes closed you stretch by turning to the other side meeting a boulder of blanket, you reach out your hand in search of your favorite person but to your surprise, your hand leans on the mattress, so you open your eyes trying to focus and notice that half of the bed is empty.
You've been together for 7 months and 13 days now, and you have to say that they are the best months of your life; Having never had previous relationships, it can be said that Matt is your first true and actual relationship in your 20 years of life. 
Everything had started as a pure joke between you two to make fun of Chris and his girlfriend Maddy, but the more time passed, the more you began to feel real feelings towards the boy that unlike you he had liked you for a long time, but for fear of being considered only and solely a friend, he wanted to avoid putting his heart in the foreground and listening to the rational part of his brain. 
But fate wanted that one evening while you were saying goodbye to go one to your own house, the moment you were about to press a kiss against his cheek, Matt turned earlier than expected causing your lips to collide, making you immediately move away but when you stopped to look into his eyes you saw in both of them a spark so as to burst a breathless kiss.
It must be said, from that moment you have been together, indeed perhaps precisely because it is your first relationship that you try to always make everything go for the best unlike Matt who still had his first relationships during his adolescence that, however, according to him, ''they can't compete with you''. Of course, it scares you that sooner or later it may get bored or otherwise lose interest in you, but you still try to eliminate this thought and be the best girlfriend in the world. 
So you get out of bed by completely opening the window so that the room can change air, leaving the bed undone; Take your change in the drawer that Matt has free so that you can put some of your things when you stay at his house to sleep, and you head to the next bathroom without noticing who is in the open space connected by a small corridor to his room.
Meanwhile, Matt was lying on the sofa, the TV turned on in the background, with the phone in his hand looking on the various social networks but his mind was elsewhere, indeed the day had started in the wrong direction.
In fact, all night you did nothing but stay attached to him not making him move, which didn't make him sleep a wink and that's why he was quite nervous.
His brothers were still in their respective rooms changing, as they would then be out all day under your precise instructions, as you wanted to spend a day entirely with Matt before leaving for spring break in two weeks. 
When Nick and Chris find themselves in the living room ready to go out, Matt pulls up his head ''Do we have any meetings today?'' He asks confused getting up putting the phone in his pocket ''The two of us yes, you have the day off today.. enjoy it'' Chris replies with a grin on his face but which vanishes when he hears a puff from him ''Wow I didn't expect all this enthusiasm '' exclaims ironic Nick going to the door of the house ''Please let me come with you, I need to disconnect, I need air'' Matt responds whispering so as not to be heard by you ''Sorry MattyB but no'' says Chris taking a can of Pepsi from the fridge and then he goes out too.
Another puff comes out of his lips knowing he has to stay with you all day, and resignedly throws himself back on the couch closing his eyes.
When he feels your steps approaching a sense of annoyance and nervousness pervades his body, he can't even understand the reason for all this but it's already been a couple of days that he just wants to have a moment for him, but with you in the middle it's almost completely impossible.
On the other hand, you do not notice anything different, perhaps because taken by too much love that even the most obvious things go unnoticed by your eyes in the shape of a little heart. 
All happy you go to the kitchen taking water pouring it into a glass, turning you notices Matt on the sofa, you leave the glass on the counter and go in his direction lowering yourself to his height ''Babe, let's go out for breakfast?'' you ask trying to caress his hair but at your touch he moves by sitting down looking at you ''I can't, I have to go out'' he responds annoyed without even looking at you, leaving you a little surprised but don't give up trying with a ''Then when you come back we can go for a ride at Lake Hollywood Park, right?'' hopeful in one of his answers but the only thing he pronounces is a ''See you later'' without greeting you and leaving the house, leaving you standing in the middle of the living room. 
The hours go by and so does your enthusiasm, you start thinking about the worst situations in your mind, which do nothing but increase your paranoia;
Okay maybe you recognize that in the last period you have always been with them but despite the fact that it has been almost a year that you moved to Los Angeles, you have not been able to make many friends due to your armor that you tend to raise when it comes to new people. But with Nick, Chris and Matt it's different, you've known them since you were little and with them there was never a need to create a wall to protect you, because they are your guardian angels.
You've always gotten along, except for a few quarrel -which is absolutely normal-, but otherwise you've never noticed before behaviors so distant from Matt, as if your presence wasn't welcome.
When you hear the door open you hope that your boyfriend's figure will come out of the stairs but you recognize the voices of Chris and Nick, you resign yourself completely on the couch with your pajamas and the tray of ice cream on your legs.
''Ookay... why are you at home? Didn't you have to go out?'' Nick asks looking at you confused ''By the way where is Matt?'' Keep looking around ''I have no idea'' you answer him in a subtle voice while you eat a spoonful of vanilla ice cream, while you feel the tears stop at the corners of your eyes, so you don't see you turn your head on the other side putting the teaspoon in the tray ''He came out this morning and never came back, I tried to text him and call him a couple of times but I didn't receive an answer'' you keep whispering closing your eyes making the tears fall.
You feel the package of ice cream being removed from your legs and two arms that surround you, from the essence that envelops you, you recognize that is Chris and with your eyes still closed you abandon yourself in a liberating cry after holding it all day ''Shh, it's okay'' he whispers massaging your back ''You know that every now and then he has its relapses and behaves like this'' he keeps trying to reassure you.
You pull up with your nose and detach yourself from his arms ''But with me he had never behaved this way.. at all he always came to me'' you explain looking in his direction receiving almost an expression of pity on his face ''What do you say if we order something and watch a movie here all together? We will make you choose'' announces trying to cheer you up But on your part he only receives a nod with your head.
Even though he had spent the whole day outside walking around the crowded streets of Santa Monica, his mind did nothing but think about the time to get home, the only thought of having you always sticked made him take his breath away, of course he cared you but this so much physical contact, at that time, was leading him to detach himself from everything, but especially from you.
That's why he had waited for a late time to come back, so as not to have to face you trying to postpone everything to the day of your departure. But you know how his thought works more than yourself, in this way after finishing watching your comfort movie together with the two boys, you decide not to go to sleep right away but to stay on the couch not being able to stay alone in bed without Matt by your side, with the knowledge of having done something wrong. 
The fact that there was no communication between the two of you was new, you have always been the anchor of each other, and not being it in a short time has completely upset you, especially not understanding how to act, and consequently how to find a solution. 
The silence that reigns in the house is broken by the noise of the keys that are inserted into the door patch, your heart begins to beat quickly but you remain motionless sitting with your gaze turned in his direction, while his trying to slowly climb the entrance stairs but when it reaches the last one, he stops seeing you pulling his eyes up ''you shouldn’t have waited up for me, there was no need'' he says changing towards the fridge taking a bottle of water but no longer being able to hold back your thoughts for you ''What have I done? It's all day that you avoid me indeed it's days that you behave strange'' you blurt out getting up to get closer to him, and given your difference in height you are forced to pull up your head to look him better in the eyes.
''What did you do to me? There's that you've become overbearing and clingy. I can't take it anymore, you're always sticky, I never have a free moment and if I have it you're always there'' he exclaims with clenched teeth with a hard look ''We weren't like that before, and now I understand why no one has ever wanted you'' pronounces with wickedness making you take a step back not believing the words just spoken by him.
‘'You know what I’ve been through and you hold it against me, you’re an asshole'' you raise your voice as tears slide down your face; At that moment Matt opens his eyes, he had never heard you say such a thing to him, among all people it was always you to use a calm tone even in the most difficult situation. 
Seeing you rush into his room, he follows you around, but when he sees that you start to take your bags he actually realizes that he has exaggerated ‘'What do you do?’' He asks trying to take your arm but with all the anger that you had in your body in very little you wriggle from his grip ‘’Let go of me'' you say in a dry tone ‘’I’m not gonna stay in the room with you anymore, I’ll go to Nick’s, and I bring all my stuff'' you finish closing the zip dragging the bag on the ground coming out of his room, finding in front of you the two guys, who from the screams immediately catapulted to see what had happened. 
''Nick help me please?’' you ask him tired receiving as answer his hand take the bag from yours, you don’t even turn to see him but you goes up in the room with the older one feeling in the distance Chris say ‘'Dude you have already done too much damage, let her be’'. 
Days pass, but the situation at home does not.
After the heavy words received you decided to build a wall between you and Matt, and to stay away as far as possible trying to behave like a mature person, going out with the two brothers and when they can’t do it on your own, avoiding being alone with him. 
Matt, while you weren’t interacting he was feeling good, but slowly guilt started to come out and realize he didn’t need to push away the one precious person in his life, you. 
But he understands it even more when you didn’t even look at him at the airport, you left without even looking once ‘'Why did I do wrong to her?’’ He says as he watches you go to security checks ‘'Because are you a jerk, that’s why'' answers Nick watching him serious. 
He was really sorry, he wanted in every way to repair your relationship but especially wanted to make it up to you. Without saying anything to anyone, he prepares his backpack with the bare minimum because what he needed was on the other side of the country.
They were about to end your spring break, and leaving your family and friends in Boston again was like getting a stab in the heart but this time it hurt even more, because you knew that once you got back you had to get by 100% on your own, starting with looking for an apartment.
You and your family were at home for your ‘board games evening’ when you hear the bell ring ''Were you waiting for someone?’’ you ask by fixing your pawns ''We don't.. why don't you go and open it?’' your mother answers looking at you softly, confused you get up from your station.
''Please, I have to talk to you''
Matt in front of the door of your house with a bunch of tulips, your favorites and puppet with <I'm stupid> written on it making you raise the sides of your mouth slightly but that you promptly lower.
''You have 5 minutes'' you look at him as you close the door behind and sit on the rocker placed on the porch but still try to be far away. This gesture of yours doesn’t go unnoticed but instead he gives you the flowers with the puppet, you take them by placing the flowers next to you, while the puppet holds it in your hands;
''I'm so sorry.. you know I'm not good at words but I recognize the fact that I was a really bad person to tell you those words, I shouldn't have and I will never dare again..'' he says starting to play with your hands unknowingly ''.. I just had to talk to you and explain my point of view instead of just dropping the blame only on you..'' He continues by suddenly looking down and stopping from talking.
When he raises him up you see his eyes shiny and automatically yours become too ''I don't want to lose you, I was an asshole and I understood it when you left'' he says resting his hand on your cheek, at his contact you close your eyes by resting your hand on his.
''It was really a low shot this time'' you said in a low voice ‘'You had never made me feel so small, helpless but mostly wrong.. but I must admit that I have been more sticky than usual in the last period.. but it’s my way of loving you, and if you don’t like that… we can end it here'' you end up whispering your last words.
''Absolutely not! I flew 2,592 miles to see you and tell you that I love you more than my life, we just have to try to communicate as much as possible to make sure we can continue to feel good for each other'' exclaims Matt approaching while you remain still in your position ‘'I’m here because I want to be there and I want to make it up for you’' concludes by looking into your eyes ‘'I love you you too… but please let's not hurt ourselves anymore'' exclaim yourself by leaning your forehead on his and then let your lips meet in a tender kiss. 
When you pull yourself away, you smile and take the leap to pick up the teddy bear and say ''Would it be you?' and then laugh together. 
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Taglist:  @sturniolosreads @mayhem-72 @dracoflaco @lyzsaphrodite @ifilwtmfc @xoxo4chrisss @soimightlikeoldmen69 @inlovewithmattstur @sturniolobendystrawsposts @tillies33ssss @junnniiieee07
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