#(why? because it's college/uni professors who write these and they get paid by their college/uni)

[quirklessidiot]

Title: coward Pairing: F!Reader x Miya Atsumu  Genre: major angst train ahead, romance, and very slow burn [ex to lovers au] Synopsis: You were a coward and what do cowards do when they’re in an unfamiliar situation? They run, run until their legs can’t carry them. Warnings: Cursing, alchohol, mentions of unprotected sex ,unplanned pregnancy, and mentions of abortion notes: for my first story, I had to write about my number one boy right now i- anyways minor spoilers but this is kind of an AU?? As far as I know, Atsumu, Aran, and Inunaki werent college buds and Atsumu and Inunaki didnt canonically go to college so yeah uwu. Ill be fixing up my masterlist when i have all this in order ngh... If you guys want to be tagged in future stories just  fill up the tag list or if you want to be tagged in just this story, send me a message :>

next   masterlist  

The first time Miya Atsumu sees you is Spring on the first year of college.

It had been a bad day for him, girls kept crowding him and annoying him about mundane things, even going so far as interrupting his practice at the gym. If Aran hadn’t stopped him, he’d have yelled at them at that moment for interrupting him.

As he was on his way home, his eyes caught your lone figure standing there with a red bull and a cup of cold brew on each of your hands whilst a phone was clipped between your ear and shoulder, your brows were furrowed together as if you were having trouble explaining something.

You looked like every college student out there. Your hair was in a tight ponytail, your clothes seemed to be in a bit of a disheveled state, and you looked like you hadn’t slept in days. The next action you did surprised him, you had mixed your coffee with the red bull and just drank it straight from the cup. 

The blonde was expecting a palpitation to happen any moment now but you remained there, unfazed by it all and still talking on the phone with your brows furrowed.

He didn’t even notice that he was openly staring at you until one of his teammates had approached him and asked him why he was just standing there, “Jus’ saw something weird.” He muttered, returning his gaze to where you stood but it seemed like you were gone then.

The first time that he actually talked to you was because he had accidentally did his service too hard and had hit you square on the stomach.

He feels his shoulder tense as you weakly let out that you were fine and that you just needed to talk to a member name Shion Inunaki for a project, you seemed to ignore him and what he did earlier, like you paid no mind to his presence.

Next thing he knows, he sees you around a lot on campus yet just like the first time he sees you and the first time he talks to you, you barely looked his way.

The days past quickly and it’s already the second half of the school year, he sees that your classmates in one of his minor classes and that you sit in front of him yet he feels like a fuckin’ scrub around you. You barely glance his way and when he tries to initiate a conversation, your words are curt and concise.

He asks his twin one night about it.

The only reply he got was, “You ain’t the center of the world, ‘sumu. People sometimes jus’ don’t give a shit about ya, stop thinking your some big shot.” 

He curses his twin and thus begins a two minute long argument between them as usual but as he’s about to end the call in sheer frustration and annoyance, his twin says something that shuts him up immediately, “Don’t tell me you got a lil’ crush over a girl who gives zero fucks about ya.” 

Silence.

“No fuckin’ way, Tsumu.” His twin choked on the other line, “Among all the people in that huge uni?- wheeze-You ended up liking one who barely knows your existence?’

“Shut up.”

“I gotta call Aran for that, fuckin’ masochist. This shit won’t end well.”

The blonde chunks his phone to the bed and groans out loud.

Surely it couldn’t be a crush, right?

Wrong.

Next thing he knows, it's already nearing the end of the second semester and he still craves for that attention from you. Aran feels like he’s crazy, saying how impossible it is to like someone who barely acknowledges his existence. Samu, on the other hand, reiterates that he probably just wanted you because you had this mysterious air and different attitude from the girls Atsumu met before. That and because he’s a masochist who loves hurting himself apparently.

Yet he shuts them down both because of the little opportunity created by his professor in the form of a project in pairs, you picked him much to his surprise, “...You're the only person I know here.” You simply replied.

When he hears those words, he cracks a lazy smirk, “We friends now or something?” he asked.

You clicked your tongue in reply, avoiding his gaze as you muttered, ‘I guess so.’

But after that little victory moment, you remained the same. He didn’t even get to see you outside class since you said that this project didn’t need meet-ups on the weekends or after class, the only thing he got was your number and even when he did try to strike a conversation through text, you gave very short responses.

“Stop simping over her, she probably got a boyfriend that’s why she ain’t lookin your way.” Osamu advised right after he confessed his worries.

Atsumu wishes he was wrong, he really does but he’s getting frustrated. So he attempts to heed Aran’s advice and tries to shake you off. He doesn’t seek you out in class anymore yet like always, you’re not even the least bit bothered by it. He feels queasy on how easy it is for you to be that way towards him but then again, it’s not like you cared about him in the first place.

Later that week, in the midst of his sulking, he’s at a frat party and he does his best to forget about you. There were a lot of beautiful women lining up for him and willing to give him all the attention he lacked from you yet when he’s making out with one of them and this close to getting laid in one of the quiet rooms upstairs, the door bursts open and there stands you, the girl he’s been trying to desperately ignore.

“O-Oh sorry… I-Wrong room...” Your voice that used to be void of emotion was now shaky and you seemed to be forcing yourself to speak. You didn’t seem to recognize him at all since it was dark but he knew that voice and that figure anywhere.Before he could say anything else though, you're out and about, closing the door behind you.

Just like that, Atsumu shoves the girl from his lap and hurriedly puts back his shirt on. He doesn’t care if the stranger was angry or if he was in a disheveled state, he just runs and follows you out.

“Hey! Y/N!” He calls out at the quiet street, out of breath. 

You slowly turned to him and he feels his heart stop at your unfamiliar appearance, your mascara was a mess from your crying and you had scratches on your knees, indicating that you must’ve fallen down somewhere tonight. The volleyball player clears his throat and slowly approaches you, “Hey.” he softly says, taking out a handkerchief from his pocket to hand it to you.

You hesitantly take it and try to get rid of the mascara running down your face.

“Come on, Y/N.” He croons as he takes off his jacket to put it on you, ‘samu was right about one thing, he really couldn’t say no to you, “Let's take you home.”

It was that little moment that made Miya Atsumu’s stepping stone towards you.

Yet in the end, despite those endless times of him chasing you, you still chose to run further away from him instead.

tag list (closed)

@fortheloveofiwaizumi @svtbitch @ryaaaax @kiyoomile @lovedanii  @juno-multifandom​ @gyubit17​

#haikyu!! fanfics #miya atsumu x reader #miya atsumu imagine #atsumu x reader #atsumu imagines #miya atsumu scenarios #haikyu imagines #haikyu headcanons #haikyu scenarios #haikyu x reader #coward series

[purplesurveys]

945

A Survey For College/Uni Grads Survey by emptyspaces

What year did you graduate? 2020. It’s only been a little over a month, too.

What degree do you have? Journalism, but I might as well have had a minor in history because of the amount of history electives I took as well haha.

What classes did you take your first year? The first semester of my first year was purely for general courses, so I took basic courses on English, biology, math, philosophy, and Philippine history. By the second semester I took more basic courses on public speaking, physics, and social science, but by then I was already allowed to take two journalism majors.

Second year? My general courses included a basic course on art history, chemistry, English, Filipino, Asian history; my majors were on communication and media, news reporting, media law, media theory, journalism ethics, and an introductory course on broadcast communication.

Third year? The only general courses I had by this point were an intro to political science and a class on Philippine government and politics. I mostly took majors this year though, which wiped me the crap out: my majors were on media and society, feature writing, public relations, international relations, fact-checking, broadcast management, Southeast Asian history, and introductory courses on macroeconomics, film, psychology, and communication research.

Fourth year? I took up journalism design and layout, contemporary Philippine history, Philippine social history, pornography in media just because lol, an introductory course on anthropology, and I also got started on my thesis as well. My second and final semester got cancelled entirely because of the pandemic, but I would have finished units on business reporting, online journalism, community press, and the history of women in the Philippines.

Did it take you longer than four years to graduate? No. That would have disappointed my parents big time and considering how much effort they’ve put to send me to good schools, the least I could do was to graduate on time. Even if I wanted to shift out of my course, it would’ve led to a delay and I didn’t want that for them and I personally didn’t want that for myself either.

Did you start at 18, or did you have a gap year(s) after high school? Again, I didn’t want to take gap years for my parents’ sake. I immediately went to college right after graduating high school, like what the majority of students here do.

Was it a small or large college/university? Very large. The competition is even bigger – 100,000++ high school seniors take the entrance exam every year but they only take in around 10,000 passers. Still, 10,000 new students every school year is so many, and it’s always a bitch to get class slots because of our population.

Public or private? Public. 

Is there anything the school is well-known for? All sorts of things. It’s one of the top schools in the country, so we hog the spotlight in the national news pretty much everyday. I think the biggest things we’re known for though is our reputation for research and our activism history. It also makes us a popular target of pro-government trolls.

What were some of your favorite classes? I loved taking up art studies and all of my political science and history electives, and as for my journalism electives I really only enjoyed public relations and that one class where we ran an online magazine for a whole semester.

What were some classes you hated? Fucking economics. And fact-checking. And the fact that I took both in the same period...got my lowest average for that semester because of those classes, too. I feel like I would have done better if my economics class didn’t have a population of 200 and if I had a more experienced professor fact-checking but shit happens, I guess. I also felt like my porn class was a waste because the readings were so pretentious. And of course, philosophy.

Did you have any super-long classes? Like 3 hours or longer? All majors in my college are 3 hours long. So classes like PR, journalism ethics, feature writing, business reporting, media law, communication theory, etc. all definitely took a big chunk of my weekdays.

Did you ever change your major? No. I had multiple conversations with myself to decide if I should, but aside from not wanting to get delayed I also accepted the fact that as much as I had grown to not like journalism as a practice, the technical skills taught in it were still going to be super useful in the industry I want to get into, which is communications and PR.

Did you do any internships? If so, where? I did. I interned at a PR agency last year but it was part of my requirements to complete my course, so it felt forced to an extent. I’m currently interning at another PR agency, but this time I’m out of school and it’s a personal choice of mine.

Did you ever take any online classes? If so, which ones? I only had one or two online class sessions at the beginning of the lockdown, but my school ultimately cancelled the semester altogether in consideration of disadvantaged students who may not have laptops of their own or wi-fi at home. In the end they just gave a grade of ‘P’ to everyone, which meant Pass.

Were textbooks expensive? I didn’t need to buy entire textbooks because my professors usually just took excerpts or chapters from certain relevant books and let us photocopy the pages, which costs a lot cheaper than having to buy books.

What other supplies besides books did you have to buy for your classes? Other than course readings I didn’t need to spend much. Journalism isn’t a material-heavy course like how film or broadcast communication is.

Were you in any clubs or student organizations? Yes. I was in a journalism org, our graduation committee, and was part of a student publication at one point. I also tried to join AIESEC but my schedule was so hectic at the time that I had to drop it.

Did you ever volunteer anywhere? I was a lecturer and facilitator for the journalism workshops that my org regularly held (and will probably continue to volunteer even as a grad, since I know they appreciate alumni lecturers lol), and one time I also volunteered to be an usher for Batch 2019′s graduation.

Were you on any sports teams? Nope. I liked playing table tennis, but I was never trained properly enough to make it to varsity. 

Where was your favorite place to eat on campus? It depended on how much of a hurry I was in and how much I was willing to spend. The cheapest option was the network of kiosks scattered around campus which sold the same instant noodles and street food. If I wanted to reward myself but was on a tight budget, I went to Area 2 which is a residential street in campus that was also dotted with small food booths ran by the homeowners; if I had some money to spend and the time to stay in a sit-in restaurant I used to go to Chocolate Kiss.

Did you work while you were in college? I did not. I was lucky to be in a privileged position where my parents were able to provide for me and where I never had to worry about finances.

If so, where? How many hours per week?

How many times did you move throughout college? I didn’t. We lived in the same house the whole time I was in college.

Did you live on campus, in an apartment, or somewhere else? I lived at home and I just drove to and from school everyday, since the campus was near-ish enough for me not to avail of a dorm or condo.

Did you live with roommates? Alone? With a significant other? I lived with my family, but tbh it was mostly my mom and brother at home since my sister stays at a dorm and my dad works abroad.

If off-campus, how much was your rent? Never had to pay any.

How often did you go back to visit your parents? I went home to my mom every night lol, unless I had a sleepover at someone else’s place.

Did your parents help you out with living costs? Sure did. Nothing changed with my living arrangements and I still lived under their roof.

Did your parents (or someone else) pay for your tuition? They paid for the first two semesters; then by my sophomore year the government passed an act implementing free tuition for all state universities so since then they never had to pay a cent for my education.

Was it an expensive school? Not at all, which is why the competition to get in is so fierce. To illustrate, four years in my school is just equivalent to one semester in my sister’s college. Last time I checked one unit is ₱1500 or roughly $30.

If you paid for it, do you still have student loans you're paying off? I don’t have student loans. Idk if that’s a thing here, actually. I don’t think it is.

How many people did you date throughout college? One.

What was your longest relationship while in college? The whole four years. I was in the same relationship when I started and ended.

Were you in a sorority/fraternity? Fuck no.

Were you into partying? Just occasionally. I wasn’t a wild partier but I did go to a few college parties every now and then, and I certainly went to nearby bars nearly every Friday.

Where did you and your friends usually hang out? Along Katip, since there were enough places there to hang out in. Occasionally we’d go to Maginhawa, but I prefer it a lot less because the parking there sucks balls.

What did you and your friends do for fun? Drink, eat, play games.

Do you still keep in touch with any college friends? Very much. I support those who remain in the org, and I occasionally catch up with those who had already graduated.

Did any of them graduate with the same degree as you? Most of them did. It’s how I met them.

What did you do after you graduated? I rested for a bit but an existential crisis quickly came over and now I’m in a bit of a mental slump, but at least I’ve scored this internship to keep me occupied.

How was the pay at your first job out of college? The company I’m currently interning for objectively pays well, but they acquired me as an intern because they aren’t offering full-time positions for now. That said, I get an allowance rather than a salary so it isn’t much at all, but I’m still happy to be in the company because it’s supposed to be one of the top agencies in the country.

What classes prepared you the most for your career? PR, feature writing, public speaking, news reporting, online journalism...and tbh org work. 

- Five favorite memories from your college days -

1: UP vs DLSU basketball game from September last year HAAAAAA

2: Attending my organization’s orientation and encountering them for the first time, not knowing I was going to bloom so much there and gain my closest friends

3: High Def 2018 and 2019

4: Drinking at VSpot with Angela, Hans, Gabie, and whoever else from their Ateneo gang that also got invited

5: TK with orgmates

#survey #surveys

[vmstudies]

30+ things i learned in my first semester of college

Okay, so as a college freshman in her second semester, I wanted to write all this down before I forget it all or it becomes irrelevant. College is a trippy af time, especially for freshmen, and I know high schoolers are all freaking out trying to find what’s true and what’s not. So here’s what I learned my first semester of college, and some stuff I’m still learning.

Warning: this post is long af. 

disclaimer: I’m a nursing ROTC student so I’ve got like a million and one things on my plate at any given time, and I have a wake up call at 5:00am almost every day of the week, so if you have to/already do wake up early, this will be great for you.

1. Be patient. You’re going to have people around you doing all different things. You may not be going out, but your hall mates will. Learn to let go and let them be. Unless they’re screaming excessively in the hall at 3am. Then maybe say something.

2. Do all the extra credit you are offered. Most professors only have 3-4 exams and a final. At least 99% of mine so far have done that. Take what you can get and do everything to keep your grades up.

3. Time management is key. I personally suck at it, but I find ways. Unfortunately sometimes, for me, it means cutting sleep, which I would not recommend, especially if you’re waking up so early. But learn to manage your time the way that works for you.

4. Find a good pair of headphones. Some noise cancelling ones preferably. Those will become your best friends.

5. Coffee will be other your best friend. Even if you don’t drink it. I never had a single cup of coffee till first week of second semester. I drink a cup a day now.

6. Eat well. It doesn’t have to be a salad every meal, but find the healthiest options you can that you like. The Freshman 15 is real, and I gained it, but I’ve lost 10 pounds just by eating a portioned amount of each food group per day.

7. Exercise. This goes along with eating in preventing the Freshman 15, but it also helps with stress relief and focus among a million and one other health benefits.

8. Take chances. Nothing illegal and nothing that could jeopardize your health, grades, or future, but just remember that when a moment passes, you can never get it back.

9. You don’t have to be best friends, or even friends at all with your roommate. But make an effort to get along. My roommate and I learned very quickly that we were not going to be best friends like we thought, but we get along well enough, and that’s all that matters.

10. You’re probably not going to remain friends with all of your high school pals. Even the ones who go to school with you. I thought the group from my high school at my uni would be my best friends and now I only see them when my roommate brings them by.

11. Take a chance on everyone. You’d be surprised who could become the best friend you’ve ever had very quickly.

12. Colleges will want your living situations for next year very quickly. Don’t panic. Just get it done before rents go up.

13. Look for ways to contribute to your city. Volunteer at churches or food banks or homeless shelters or hospitals - wherever works best for you. You start to feel a part of a community when you give back to it.

14. Skipping class isn’t bad, but only when it’s done a few times. If you only show up for exams, you’re screwed, because there are things on the exam that won’t always be on the PowerPoints. TL;DR: show up to class.

15. Don’t drink after people. Mono runs rampant on college campuses, and it’s now airborne. Hand sanitizer is your third new best friend. 

16. Exam season isn’t that scary. As long as you’re maintaining your grades in a class, the finals should be okay. Should be.

17. Assuming you aren’t a commuter, if you have the ability to go home every weekend, don’t. The weekends are a time for you to hang out with friends and have fun at college. If you’re spending it at home, it’s not even worth it.

18. That being said, if you have the ability to go home “often” and you’re happy and comfortable at home, visit every once in a while. It’s good for the soul.

19. Many professors are there to complete research requirements. That being said, it doesn’t matter to them whether they’re good professors or not so long as they get their work done. That being said, you will have some shitty professors. Just work hard and beat them by beating their class.

20. You will have some professors who are, to put it nicely, absolute dicks. Again: beat them by beating their class. Ace that shit then never sign up for a class with them again.

21. Find the study style that suits you best. Rewriting notes is absolutely useless for me. This semester, my study style has become taking notes in notebooks in my dorm, and just having the PowerPoint up to add notes to the slides as my profs speak. It works.

22. Have someone in every class you can text and ask questions or study with. Cooperate to graduate, kids.

23. This one is huge. You will get homesick. It’s almost a total guarantee. It may not be immediate, but it will hit and it will hit hard. Don’t worry. Nobody’s freshman year is what they say it is. Yeah, you’ll find your group, but chances are you’ll spend the first semester drifting and asking if you’re the one person in the entire world who isn’t enjoying things. You’re not. We’re all in the same boat. Just keep drifting. You’ll find your group eventually. Who knows - they may be closer than you think.

24. Sororities and frats may seem like all that, but - at my university at least - while they’re huge here, they’re also a major pain in the ass. Rush for sororities was literal hell, and one girl I was talking to the other day said she lost 12 pounds in just that one week. Know what you’re getting into.

25. If you’re single and remain that way, don’t worry. There’s nothing wrong with you there either. People move at their own pace. My best friend has, like, 5 guys wanting to date her right now, and I have absolutely no one (that I know of). Don’t worry. Just keep doing what you’re doing. The right one will come eventually.

26. Know what you’re worth.

27. Get to class at least 5 minutes early. I’m always running to my 8:30 and it sucks.

28. 8:30 classes aren’t that bad. As someone who is most definitely not a morning person, I have yet to complain. It’s nice to get up and get going for the day.

29. 6:00pm classes suck. Mine ends at 7:15 and then I still have to go get dinner, which is in the opposite direction from my dorm, get back to my hall, shower, eat aforementioned dinner, do schoolwork and study, etc. It’s a pain.

30. Find something small you can do that makes you happy. For me, it’s Korean. I started teaching myself Korean halfway through last semester and I like to think I’m doing pretty well for someone self-taught. I also have a stack of notecards that hits the 26oz mark on my Nalgene. It’s kind of insane.

31. BUDGETING IS SO FREAKING IMPORTANT. I cannot stress this enough. And so is saving. If you get a paycheck or an allowance of any kind, put some of it away in savings every time you get paid, and try not to touch that savings money.

32. Be open to everyone else’s likes/dislikes/thoughts/feelings/opinions. You don’t have to agree or like it, but respect it. You’ll meet people who have all different hobbies, opinions, religious/political views. As long as they’re not out there preaching that we should all just kill each other or whatever, idk, respect it. Respect Dems if you’re a Republican; respect Republicans if you’re a Democrat. Respect Muslims and Jews and Christians/Catholics and Hindus and Buddhists and anything else you can think of. Respect.

33. Keep your dorm neat. Make your bed every day. Clean room=clean mind. Clean mind=better studying.

34. Do your laundry every week, y’all. Shit gets nasty.

35. Only bring what you need. If you find after 2-3 weeks you haven’t used it, send it home. Dorms are tiny. You need all the space you can get.

36. If you’re religious, find your religious community. It will be a great reprieve a few times a week. I was never overtly Catholic, and I’m still not, but it’s nice to get away for an hour a week. Plus after 5pm mass Sundays they feed us home-cooked food, and it’s freaking good. Take advantage of that.

37. Find a place on campus that reminds you of why you’re there when you have doubts or you’re feeling homesick. For me, it’s the first place I ever saw when I stepped on campus: the main lawn. It’s super relaxing and it’s a great reminder that I’m there to kick ass, get a degree, get a commission, and become the person I’m supposed to be in the process. It can also mean the difference between contemplation and a total breakdown. TL;DR: find a place that eases your mind.

That’s all I can think of right now, but if you have more that I missed, feel free to add on! Again, this is all from my own personal experience, and if you find that you don’t agree with one, okay. One size does not fit all. But this is just what I recommend. Have fun in college and good luck! Remember: YOU GOT THIS THING!

#studyblr #studyspo #college #college prep #things i learned #tips for college #college tips #self care

[heuristicc]

Can you share some tips on 1. How to manage time 2. How to deal with/ professors Thanks

yeah i would love to! 

okay so time management: the best advice I can give is to write out every single thing you have to do and when you have to do it by and then prioritize your time around that. i know this can be incredibly tough when taking multiple classes and working and trying to fit in exercise and a social life so it will take some practice. i highly recommend the website mystudylife.com because it really helps to see all of your assignments for the semester laid out in one place. i also made myself a schedule for the end of the semester just on the calendar app of my laptop/phone for when i can work on what because i know if i dont i would leave everything until the last minute and have to do it all in one night. but also don’t kick yourself if you fall behind schedule! life gets in the way a lot and (most) professors understand that and this is a segue into answering the next point...

dealing with professors: i think the most important thing to remember is they were a student too once. they may not have had the same pressures we face today with rising tuition costs and having to work more hours on top of our course load to pay for it, but they do understand the stress of a million deadlines seeming to all come at you at once. most professors in my opinion want you to succeed and will do whatever they can to help you do that, it’s only the rare few who are too bitter and stuck up to admit they were once in your shoes (this is why i highly recommend checking ratemyprofessors.com before choosing a prof). most profs are excited when students ask questions in class or by email because that means you’ve taken an interest in the subject and/or really want to understand it, so ask anything that comes to your mind, whatever is going to help you understand the material better. also, if you have a question, chances are at least five other people in your class were wondering the same thing and were just too shy to ask. also, don’t be afraid to ask for extensions! the absolute worst thing that can happen is they say no, so it’s always worth the risk. 

one final point: you know how people would roast you in high school for being a teacher’s pet? that can literally save your grade in college/uni. I had one professor with a super strict no late assignments policy (like straight up would not accept late assignments) but I always paid attention in class and contributed to discussions and handed my work in on time so one day when I totally blanked and forgot to hand in an assignment I explained to her that I did do it I just forgot to hand it in, she let me hand it in with no penalty because she trusted that i was telling the truth. 

#thank you for the question sorry i wrote a whole ass essay on it #desireeescalonasblog #answered

[shoddy-sonneteer]

Felicitous Rivals

Pairing: Jinyoung*reader

Genre: Enemies to lovers! AU, Fluff

Word Count: 2969 words

Summary: Your life takes a turn when you decide to agree to a lucrative bet placed in front you by your rival, Park Jinyoung.

 The scores for the class test that you and your classmates had taken a week back was being announced by your professor. Even before your name was being called out, you were an anxious mess. You knew you had done fairly well. If you were being a bit too confident, you would also say that you had done better than majority of the class. You were listening intently to all the names hoping for your name to be announced soon so you could get rid of the anxiety.

Soon, your name was called and you had scored 95% in the test. You were the happiest person in the whole hall as you were the only had scored above 90%. But that happiness was short lived because of the name of the next person that was called out.

“Park Jinyoung. 96%.”

Surprised, you turn to look at the owner of that name as he shot you a smirk cocking his eyebrows from his place.

Fucking Park Jinyoung! You absolutely hated that guy though the both of you have barely spoken to each other. He was there in almost every class the you attended and his name always comes right behind yours.

There was a silent and unspoken competition between the both of you regarding who would score more than the other and it had only been getting intense as days pass by neither of you wanting to give up.

At first it didn’t seem as if it was a competition. The both of you were seated at the far ends of the big hall with no means to contact each other. You even have completely different set of friends that had no connection in any way.

It started when you were in your sociology class and a similar class test was conducted. You had scored more than him but since you didn’t know him, you paid no mind to the judgy look he sent your way. But in the next test, he scored more than you and gave a look that said ‘Got you loser’ and you were no loser. So, you decided to put your heart and soul and prepare for the next text and this is exactly how the competition came into effect and has been going for the past one year.

The more annoying thing was that this competition wasn’t limited only to the test. The both of you proceeded to compete in almost every competition held by your uni. You didn’t know if he was keeping track of his wins and losses, but you sure were in order to pay him back for every loss of yours.

Your friends never really understood your need to win in every competition and thought your obsession to win against him as an obsession to win over him which annoyed you further. They sometimes would never shut up when you whined to them about how he scored more than you. As a result, you stopped talking to them about Jinyoung altogether.

 Determined to score more than him in the next test, you exit the class to find your friends before heading to the next class. But you had to stop dead in your tracks hearing the voice of the one person that you didn’t want to calling out for you. All you wanted to do right now was hide under a rock than look at his smug face which would tempt you to punch his face.

“Yes?” you asked turning to face him you could see that he didn’t even make an attempt to hide the smug look on his face. Well did you expect him to not flaunt it on your face? Absolutely not because you would have done the same.

“I want to make our ‘competition’ more interesting.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, we have been competing for so long with neither an end to it nor any reward to the winner.”

“That’s because this is the first time, we are even talking to each other properly and not glaring.”

“You sure about that? Because I feel like if looks could kill, I would have dropped dead for more than thousand times within the span of two minutes we started talking now.”

You couldn’t help but roll your eyes at his exaggeration. Maybe you were slightly glaring at him right now. But that was because he scored more than you and were being detained by him to talk about something that he wouldn’t get to any time soon.

“What do you propose?” you asked ignoring his last comment.

“Uni is ending with this term and we are going to part ways after it for good. So, I was thinking, the person with the highest GPA at the end of this term is the ultimate winner and the loser has to do whatever the winner asks them of. For 24 hours.”

You thought about it. Though on one hand it seemed lucrative, it was risky, the margin in which either of you lost to each other was very small and that’s what made this competition between the both of you interesting. Besides the reward seemed attractive. Imagine the things you could make him do for one whole day.

“Sounds good. I’m in.”

“Great. It’s a bet then.” He announced extending his hand for a shake. You shook his hand with a smirk. You were least surprised to see a similar smirk because the both of had the same thought of winning and making the other your slave for one whole day.

Ever since the bet, you had been spending more time reading either at the library or your apartment where there was less chances of distraction. You had to win this bet at all costs because losing meant you doing whatever Jinyoung wants you to do. And you didn’t even want to think of all the sadistic plans he made in that pretty – sorry petty – brain of his.

Everything was going great and as per your plan. You had finished studying the complete syllabus and had also done your revision one week before the final exams. You were quite confident that the one losing the bet would not be you.

After completing your revision, you decided to step out of the apartment to grab some dinner and also get some fresh air. Since you didn’t want to spend a lot of time looking for a good place and travelling, then eating and then travelling back to your place, you decided to go to the diner that was situated near the college dorms.

As soon as you entered, you weren’t the least bit surprised to see that majority of the population that was occupying a seat was from your uni. You took a seat at the counter service and ordered your regular dinner.

But your plans of having a peaceful dinner had to be thrown out of the window because the devil himself decided to take a seat next to you instead of sitting with his friends who were seated a few booths away.

“Enjoying your meal?” he asked handing you the bottle of ketchup that you were reaching out for.

“Thanks, and yes. Isn’t that why you’re here too?”

“Yea. But I wanted to talk to once before the exams start.”

“Go ahead. I’m listening.” You said looking at him with full concentration.

“Well, its nothing big. I just wanted you to be ready to do my bidding for a whole day after the results are declared.”

“In your dreams, Park. There’s no way I’m losing that bet.”

“We’ll see (Y/L/N). after all the exams start in a day and the results will be announced in a month. But you know, after analyzing our history, I thought I should give you a heads up.” He said with a smirk which only annoyed you further.

But you decided to not act upon that annoyance when you could rather prove him wrong by beating him in that bet.

“Thanks for the heads up then. Now, can I eat my dinner in peace?” you asked passing him a fake sweet smile that made him chuckle.

“Of course. Who am I to stop you from eating your delicious meal? I’ll see you later, (Y/L/N).” he said walking away to the booth where his friends were already seated.

You knew that if you paid too much attention to what Jinyoung had just said, it would mess with your brain and you might end up forgetting whatever you had already prepared. In order to distract yourself from his words and the commotion at the diner, you started listening to music in your earphones successfully tuning out all the noises.

After having your meal and paying for it, you decided to revise a topic that you weren’t so sure you’d be able to write well if asked. Though your brain had this idea. Your leg had a mind of its own. It is no surprise that you were a clumsy person and often tripped on air even on flat surfaces.

Just as you got off the stool, you collided head into a person that had been walking in that direction and while you made an attempt to steady yourself, your hand slipped from the stool and fell on the ground hitting your head hard on the diner counter.

The events that took place after that were a blur to you – literally. You couldn’t see anything clearly and that was until you slipped into a state of unconsciousness.

 When you woke up later, all you could guess was that you were at a hospital. But you had no idea who brought you here and how they did it and for how long you were unconscious. You decided to call for a nurse but your throat was dry as a parchment and to your luck, no one could see you because of the curtains drawn around your bed.

Soon, you heard some voices talking behind those curtains, among which only one of them was a familiar one. As much as you were embarrassed to meet Jinyoung right now, he was the one to whom you could ask the happenings of the previous (hopefully) night.

After he finished talking to the person who you assumed was the doctor, you saw him part the curtains and approach your bed with a bag in his hand.

“You’re awake.” He declared noticing that your eyes were open wide as compared to the last time he saw you at the same bed before leaving to grab some necessities. “Want some water?” he asked handing you a bottle of water not exactly waiting for a response.

You took the bottle from him mumbling a small thank you and emptied its contents in record time.

Now it was time for some answers.

“What happened?” you asked looking at him with a clueless expression.

“You tripped and fell, hitting you head hard giving yourself a severe concussion. You are under observation as of now. I spoke to the doctor about you having the exams. He said that you will be discharged within tonight.”

“How long was I out?”

“Well, let’s assume you tripped at around 8:30PM. And since its around 10, let’s say a solid 13.5 hours.”

“How did I get here?”

“My friends and I called for an ambulance and since they wanted one of us travel and stay the night, I volunteered.”

“So, you’re saying that you were there with me the whole time?” you asked shock lacing your voice.

“Yea. Who else?” he asked in a tone that made you seem like a little child being scolded.

But Wow. That was a lot of information to take in at a span of five or more minutes. You had tripped multiple number of times before but never once was it too serious for you to get hospitalized like this. And you also never expected Park Jinyoung to stay by your side till you woke up. I guess things really do change.

“Thanks for staying and taking care of me.” you thanked him sincerely as he took a seat that was near your bed.

“It’s no problem. Besides, I had to make sure that the person with whom I placed the most important bet of my lifetime was ok. But looking at you right now, I guess we will have to cancel the bet as you are not exactly you.”

“NO! I mean no. I’m fine right now. And I’m sure I can do well tomorrow at the exam if I revised properly right now.” You answered eyeing the book he had in his hand.

“You sure you’re not lying in order to continue the bet?” he asked eyeing you warily.

“No. I really feel fine right now. Besides, I was out for more than 13 hours. So, I feel somewhat fresh right now. Though it would be better if someone gave me some food.” You said pouting making him chuckle.

“Here, I saved an apple for you. I will ask Bam to bring some legit food for lunch for the both of us.”

You mumbled a small thank you and started eating the apple and asked him to help you revise for tomorrow’s exam.

As much as you hate to admit it, studying with Park Jinyoung was actually good and the both of you were studying till you were finally discharged from the hospital. He even made sure you reached your dorm by dropping you till your door and then left for his own room.

As soon as you entered your dorm, all you did was lay in your bed and sleep as you felt all the fatigue from earlier hit you at once.

 Next day when you woke for the exam, you knew that you were fucked and it was not in the good way. Yes, you had been studying for these exams for more than 3 months. But the concussion you suffered still had your brain fuzzy for the next few days that followed and though you knew you would pass the exams but at the same time, you also knew that you may not win the bet you had with Jinyoung.

You can’t back out of it now because when he offered to cancel the bet, you had let your pride get the best of you and had asked him to not cancel the bet. All you could do while waiting for the results to be declared was prepare yourself mentally for doing whatever he asks of you for one whole day.

 On the day the results were declared, Jinyoung sent you a text asking you meet him at the same diner where your accident had taken place.

When you arrived at the diner, he was already seated in one of the booths that was situated in the far corner. You approached him with confidence as you were prepared for your fate.

“Hey.” You greeted him as you took a seat facing him.

“Hey. Saw the results?” he asked cutting to the chase.

“Yea. My GPA is 3.7.”

“Not bad for a person that wrote the exams with a concussion.”

“Thanks. What’s your GPA?”

“A four.” He said with a smirk.

“Congratulations then.”

“Thanks. But the both of us know that we are not here to congratulate me. We are here to finish that bet once and for all.”

“I know. And your 24 hours start from now based on one condition that your demands must not be unreasonable.”

“Does asking you to go on a date with me fall under the category of unreasonable request?”

His question had thrown you off guard. You had been preparing yourself for petty requests like cleaning his apartment, doing his daily chores and similar activities. But not once did you imagine that he would ask you out on a date.

Park Jinyoung wants you to go on a date with him. But you two were never able to see each other eye to eye because of the competition you had going on. But now it was all done. Uni was over and unfortunately for you, you lost the bet. But he is giving you an option to say no to the date too.

That time when the both of you spent at the hospital together when you were under observation was not that bad. He was sweet to you and made sure you studied something in a manner that you weren’t giving your brain too much work. Maybe he’s not all that bad and anyway, one date couldn’t hurt anyone right?

“I don’t think so.” you replied, this time throwing him off guard. He hadn’t expected you to say yes so easily. But then again, you were so full of surprises.

“Alright. Be ready by 6PM for our date. I’ll come pick you up.”

“Okay. Anything else?”

“Nope. Just this one. For now.” He said his boyish features returning along with a smirk.

“Don’t make me regret saying yes, Park.” You threatened him narrowing your eyes.

“Don’t worry (Y/L/N). I’ll make sure you have a good time.” He replied with a chuckle.

“I’ll see you at 6 then.” You said getting up from your seat.

“Okay. But be careful when you walk at this diner. I don’t want you getting another concussion.”

“It was once ok? Just let it go.”

“It may be once for you. But it’s one too many times for me to see you at the hospital.”

“Fiine. I’ll be careful. Bye.” You said heading out of the diner minding your steps just in case to avoid another concussion.

Despite how you feel or rather felt about him, you were actually excited and looking forward to this date and kinda hoped it would turn out to be something nice in your life.

#got7 #got7 scenarios #got7 jb #got7 mark #got7 jackson #got7 jinyoung #got7 youngjae #got7 bambam #got7 yugyeom #got7 fluff

[khazelton98-blog]

The XX of Equal Pay

In this blog post, I will be writing about the Gender pay gap and I will touch on factors that cause the pay gap. I will talk about the dark truth of media companies who are I may add owned by old rich billionaires which I will include their opinion on the matter (eyeroll) and see if there are issues with the gender pay gap in their company mainly focusing on the BBC issues with the gender pay gap. 

As we know the BBC gender pay gap caused a lot of questions in the media industry on unequal pay for women. This happened because of the UK government demanded that the BBC had to release figures of those who work at the BBC who earn more than 150,000 pounds as a part of it’s so-called “royal charter’ ( which basically guarantees that the corporation will receive its license fee for another 11 years). The BBC published those who earned more than 150,000 pounds of the 96 only a third of them were women. The BBC consistently objects to the disclosure describing it as “poachers” that will drive salaries up in the media industry and that it helps others in the media industry headhunt its staff.  (Ruddick,2019) Even though the list is not very long it is important to note that it is the payment that the BBC was directly paid from the license fee. This means that payments made to other staff members from independently run production companies and BBC worldwide is not included in this so-called “headhunt”. This is why some absolute BBC legends are missed off the list such as Sir David Attenborough, David Dimbleby, Matt Leblanc to name a few are missed off the list due to the fact the cut off is 450,000 another example is Sherlock which stars Benedict Cumberbatch are not included due to been made by an independent production company. (Clarke and Clarke,2019)

The gender pay gap shows of the 96 that 62 were men and 34 were women. This reveals even more than just a simple lack of women that there is also a lack of ethnic diversity among those who are earning the big bucks at BBC. In 2016 it revealed that British journalism is 94% white. (Hitsch,2019) There is even evidence that the industry is lacking diversity and that people from a less snooty background are being overlooked. Mr. David Lammy (a Labour MP from Tottenham) on the 14th April 2016 made this statement in parliament “ I beg to move, that this house notes the crucial cultural role the BBC plays in modern Britan; welcomes the fact that one of the public purposes outlined in the BBC charter is to represent the UK, its nations, regions and communities; notes with concern that the last employment census in 2012 showed the number of black, Asian and minority ethnic people working in the UK creative media fell by 30.9% between 2006 and 2012; believes that a BBC target of 14.2% for 2017 is insufficient.” (Hansard.parliament.uk,2019)

This is after BBC editor Carrie Gracie resigned in January after she said that women employees were discriminated over equal pay. In response to her claims a BBC spokesman (no surprise there) said:

“While we still have more to do, much of this report is already out of date. Recent disclosures by other media organizations show that the BBC’s gender pay gap is amongst the smallest and well below the national average.” Here is the funny thing about this statement he says it’s amongst the smallest but yet there shouldn't even be a slight gender pay gap. So he carries on saying...

“But we do hold ourselves to a higher standard. This is why our action on pay has seen the BBC make real progress in addressing equal pay cases; carrying out an independent audit of equal pay; introduce independent oversight so that disputes can be resolved; take clear steps to rebalance top talent pay; reform out pay structure to ensure fairness and give an unprecedented level of transparency and information about pay ranges for all staff; and set up independent reviews to see what further steps should be taken on pay transparency.   

That's why so many colleges have contributed to project were doing- on gender, ethnicity, disability, LGBT and socio-economic diversity. We all want to make this a great place to work, where people are properly rewarded for their expertise and experience” (Press Gazette,2019) 

Going off from this statement what a load of pretentious old tosh to come out of BBC ( from a MALE spokesman had to type MALE aggressively their).

Surprise surprise.. the gender pay gap just doesn't happen in the BBC it happens all over the media industry it's funny because all these other big cats sure like to jump to the gun about BBC but yet their only doing the same thing. Many women are losing out to men in pay, with them earning more, more senior roles and getting big bonuses, the government gender pay reporting service revealed. The press Gazette showed that 91 percent of UK-based media companies paid men more than women on average based on the mean hourly rate, and 85% paid more in mean bonus pay. This is not because us women are less qualified or few enter the industry. Prime minister (bless her a lot of sarcasm there) choose the Telegraph to write about the issue about the new gender reporting rules she says “ By making this information public, organizations will no longer have anywhere to hide. Shareholders and customers will expect to see improvements and will be able to hold organizations to account if they fail to achieve them.” (Ruddick,2019)

Yet this lovely little statement in the Telegraph is so biased because they have the highest gender pay gaps in the media, with women getting paid 35% less than men on average. 3/4 of the Telegraph highest-paid staff are men, with women working  61.6% of the lower jobs. Men received bonuses of almost twice paid to women on average. Even though it is an issue in the Telegraph it is the only media company that targets to have a zero gender pay gap across the company. Nick Hugh (Telegraphs groups chief executive) has set 2025 as the year by which the company must achieve this saying it “demonstrates where we see the future of the telegraph.” They pledge to monitor frequently and improved maternity benefits. It has offered the option for more flexible working, while 50/50 gender shortlists were introduced for all of its roles.  Some others in media want to reach a zero gender pay gap sooner but only within higher brackets, while others have said they are aiming for total gender parity without setting a deadline. For example, The Financial Times aims to achieve gender parity across its global leadership by 2022, Sky pledges to fill half of its senior roles with women by 2020 and The Guardian targets a 50/50 gender balance in the top half of the organization within 5 years. (Press Gazette,2019) 

BBC’s TV competitors ITN, which produces news for ITV, Channel 4 and 5. Paid men an average of 19.6% more than women and bonus payments jumped to 77.2%. (National Union of Journalist,2019.) Their excuses for this are even funnier they mainly have more men in senior roles with 17 of its 20 top earners being men. The company has published “TARGETS” which are a 50% reduction in the pay gap within 5 years and a third of the 20 top earned will be occupied by women within 3 years, that it will publish salary bands, introduce a development program for high potential women and men, family-friendly working policies. Yes, this does sound all lovely but the fact is still why 5 years why not now.  There shouldn't be a program they should see potential from now and why do they need to make targets it should just be automatically in place now we should be equal now not in a few years. Women at ITN and BBC set up a Whatsapp group to discuss concerns on the pay gap. Natasha Morris legal and equality officer for NUJ says “ It is clear from the latest figures more needs to be done to support women into senior positions within the workplace, ensuring the maternity leave does not mean the end of career progression. It is vital that companies are transparent about pay and where inequality is identified and immediate measures are taken.” (Press, Gazette 2019) 

A book called Lifetime Disadvantage, Discrimination and The Gender Workforce by Susan Bisom-Tapp (a professor of Law in California) and Malcolm Sargeant (a professor of Labour Law at Middlesex uni). Which as your reading this I recommend you have a mental checking list in your head ticking if you feel like this is you because for me personally I totally agree with their points and I agree that being a woman in 2019 still has disadvantages and have handled a lot of discrimination on a daily basis. 

They write about Gender-based factors which effect from a very early point in their lives as girls and later as women. One of the factors is education and training whilst education is an area where young women have made progress, young women are maximizing their potential. In terms of educations access, attainment, and ambition. In terms of education access, attainment, and ambition, girls on average in OECD counties ( The Organization for Economic Co-operation and Development which included the UK.) Amongst OECD counties, girls on average are more likely than boys to anticipate in high-status careers.  Side note I as a women hope to be in a high-status career. Young women clearly are more into undergradute study as on average in OECD counties 59% are female university graduates. So from this, no media company can’t technically say women are not qualified because there is the proof in the pudding we are more likely to have a degree so, therefore, why are we not seen to be more ambitious than males just from that fact. 

Stereotyping is the second factor in the model. Which begins in the classroom and extending into the workplace, gender beliefs about the different characteristics of male and females may lead to differential treatment. In the classroom, boys tend to receive more praise than girls are more frequently accepted. Research reveals that girls are likely to be rewarded for quite and compliant behavior. Which I agree with I felt like this was a problem personally primary and secondary school it was like its accepted for girls not to have a voice and that we should be quiet and poised which is completely wrong we should be outspoken because without it change will not happen. Despite the long-standing prohibition of sex discrimination in the workplace as well. These biases may infect articulation of a given jobs description and skill requirements and the way employment decisions are made. Due to this stereotyping, this has an enormous effect on occupational advancement over time. Which kind of suck for us women because it feels like these companies are writing rubbish job descriptions to hold us back which is not fair. 

Income inequality is another factor is the UK is high, with a rank of sixth amongst the (OECD). The top 10% average income in 2012 was 10.5 times that of the bottom 10% owning 47% of the country’s net wealth. Multiple discrimination women may occupy statuses that further complicate the way in which they are being viewed and treated. One complicating factors is the issue of ageing which I think is so ageist that older workers are viewed as less competent and more difficult to train and more expensive than a younger worker. Which in my opinion is wrong because older people have earned their stripes, their experience so therefore they should be an expense its only fair. Women can encounter other issues and their position in the workplace including minority race-ethnicity, migration status, religion, disability, and sexual orientation.  This is terrible not only just because we are women it's all these so-called attachments that can affect us which shouldn't be the case. Who cares where you from, what you believe, what you like or what you believe in. Those with children may collide with a ‘maternal wall’, which diverts or even terminate career paths when women become pregnant, give birth or choose to work in part-time or flexible work arrangements in order to meet family responsibilities. Whilst some women may have to choose a ‘zero hours’ contracts (which are vile and should be full stop banned). Their pay may suffer from working in such positions and which could affect retirement savings and planning. Women can find the unpredictable hours of work be troublesome with caregiving responsibilities. 

To finish this off the gender pay gap will always be a burning issue in the media industry due to being an “a mans world” and fat cats such a Mr. Murdoch, the brothers, and other idiotic pigs it will not change until there is a change in the upper parts of the media industry. It should be an industry for everybody but sadly it is not. I believe there should be a constant review on the gender pay gap and it should be changed instantly it shouldn't take years because if they can give bonuses to men so easily, they can do the same for women. The disadvantages of being a woman in the media industry out ways the positives it is very sad to see in the 21st century we are still dealing with issues of women not been seen the same as males. Women have fought for decades before for equality and yet we seem to be in the same boat decades later. I can see how women feel unfortunate to be a woman because of the way they are being treated but we need to stand up for what we want and not just look at the basic gender pay gap but look at all the others issues such as race and factors that are simply out of our control and more importantly stereotypes. This is what news should be about rather than the fat cats slating each other when they are all as bad as each other. The change will happen but it looks like it will be a long time till it is in reach. 

word count: 2402

#unequalpay #bbc #genderpaygap

[izumitate]

missed the last train back to me&you

kurodai week day 2: post-breakup

I think this is the only kurodai fic I’ll ever write where they don’t eventually get together. :(

French vanilla with two teaspoons of sugar and a dash of cream, just the way Daichi likes it. Served in the same worn yellow mug that Kuroo used to always save for him whenever he was over.

(“It reminds me of you, that’s why,” Kuroo explains, smiling to himself as he dries the dishes Daichi hands over.

“Because it’s butter-colored?” Daichi teases, memorizing the way surprise settles in Kuroo’s eyes like a summer moth on a lantern before it flits away.

“No! No, it’s- god, this is cheesy. It’s not butter-colored, you goof. It’s sunshine-colored. So, uh. That’s why.”

“That’s...really sweet, actually. You’re cute in unexpected ways, Tetsurou.” With careful hands Daichi picks up the sunshine mug, washing the soap bubbles away. When he passes it over, their fingers brush, and he glances down, hiding his flushed face by concentrating on scrubbing the next plate.)

The coffee is bittersweet.

Light splashes the kitchen table from the high skylight window the way it always did, but there’s a glass mobile hanging there now that catches the sunbeams and scatters them in rainbow shards across the room. Kuroo still takes the stool directly beneath the window, leaving the other one for Daichi, in the shade the way he likes it.

He had also hung Daichi’s coat on the hook farthest from the door, and put out the cream-filled biscuits they used to buy at the corner grocery for a mid-morning snack. They’re the kind of minutiae that he wouldn’t expect someone to know unless they had lived together for quite some time.

It’s not that Daichi is surprised Kuroo still remembers the little details after all these years. It’s just that it aches more than he expected, this reminder that they used to be more than what they are now.

That they used to be in love.

“So you’re still at the same university then?” Kuroo asks after Daichi puts his cup back on its coaster. Those are new: round little silicone things covered in abstract designs and noisy colors. It’s not an aesthetic Daichi would’ve expected to see in Kuroo’s home. Then again, it isn’t just his home anymore.

The blue checkered cotton hand towels in the bathroom. Bottles of sparkling water in the fridge. Frog slippers at the entryway. New chair, new carpet, new curtains. New bedsheets. New indentation on Daichi’s- no, on the other side of the bed.

Kuroo’s house belongs to two people now. Kuroo’s life belongs to two people now, and Daichi isn’t one of them. And it doesn’t hurt to know this, but there remains a hollow spot in Daichi’s heart reserved for the feelings he used to hold for Kuroo that can never be filled.

“Yeah, well, I’m just two years away from tenure and I like my colleagues and my tiny office, so I figured I might as well stick around. And professors get free coffee on Thursday mornings at the uni cafe, so there’s that too.”

Kuroo’s dreadful laugh is the same, all cackle and no panache, and it brings a smile to Daichi’s lips as easily as it ever did. He looks much the same as he did back in high school, in college, and after. Untamable hair, shrewd eyes, and the sweetest smile when the lights are low and sunrise still hours away.

“Sounds like you’ve got a good gig. The hospital caf is the literal worst; I wouldn’t eat there even if they paid me to. And they’re definitely not paying me to.”

“I hope you’re not skipping meals again.”

“Aw, you’re still a worrier, Daichi. Don’t worry, I bring homemade bentos now. No more skipping.”

“Oh! That’s great. Healthy and delicious.” God, Daichi feels like he’s stumbling over a conversation that should be easy, tongue-tied by a few implications that should have been obvious. Home-cooked lunch. That’s good. Kuroo spends so much time taking care of other people that he forgets about himself. It’s good he found someone who pays attention to him the way he deserves.

(“Shit, we’re so late,” Kuroo laughs as he shoves Daichi’s papers into his bag. With one hand he catches the umbrella that Daichi throws his way. Outside, the rain patters down in a spring shower, leaving droplets behind on every budding branch.

“Not if we catch the 6:10 train, we’re not. C’mon, let’s go, let’s go.” Daichi gets one foot into his shoe before Kuroo lets out a wail and backtracks into the house.

“Lunch, we forgot lunch!”

“Of course we did,” Daichi groans. He kicks his shoe off, accidentally flinging it into the door as he scrambles back inside as well. Their bags lie abandoned on the wooden floor.

They find a scavenger’s meal in their fridge: an apple for each of them, leftover soup and old rice, some scraps of sausage and boiled vegetables that they hurriedly scoop into a thermos. Daichi drops a sausage on the ground and Kuroo immediately bends down and crams it in his own mouth.

“Don’t waste food,” he admonishes Daichi, who’s laughing too hard to be able to properly clean the spot of sauce off the kitchen tiles.

“Don’t keep pressing snooze on the alarm clock!”

“That’s a different issue.”

“We have a lot of issues,” Daichi says as he hustles them out the door. “Like owning only one umbrella.”

“We’ll share, Daichi. It’s more romantic that way, eh?” Kuroo links his arm with Daichi’s as they head down the street, which becomes a liability when they start running to catch the train, umbrella almost flying out of Kuroo’s hand as they sprint down the sidewalk soaked by rain.)

“So,” Kuroo says almost bashfully once they’ve made the requisite amount of small talk before gossiping about the people they know for fifteen minutes. “You’re probably wondering why I called you here. Or you already know. I mean, of course you know; you’re smart, you must have pieced it together-”

“You’re rambling again, Tetsu,” and it’s unfair to sound as fond as he does, but he can’t help himself. “I received the invitation. It was lovely, by the way. You have better taste than I remembered.”

“No, I’m exactly the same,” Kuroo admits. “I had minimal input on the decor. Food and music were more my thing.”

“Oh, no. That’s even worse. Please spare us,” Daichi says in monotone, and Kuroo rolls his eyes good-naturedly.

“Sure, get your laughs in now, jerk. You won’t be laughing when I withhold cake from you.” Kuroo’s smile slips for a second into nervousness and he tugs at the cowlick on the back of his head. The one that appears when he showers before going to sleep, leaving his hair extra birdlike in the morning. “Which brings me to what I wanted to ask you. I know it’s not usually good form to invite your- um, your ex to your wedding, but we talked it over and...I mean, you and I are still friends, aren’t we?”

Friends, former rivals, former lovers. Something else.

“Of course we are, you dork,” Daichi says, shaking his head like Kuroo’s foolish for even asking.

It’s not that they’d been avoiding each other. It was just a consequence of growing older, Daichi presumed. They’d never had a falling out, or anything so dramatic. Their lives had just started to unwind from one another’s, each of them branching toward something incompatible with the other person’s growth, and sometimes, love stretches too distant to sustain itself.

“Right, and I know we dated, but that was ages ago, and I don’t want that to supercede the friendship we’ve always had. Aki and I discussed it already, and we’re okay with whatever happens, so I don’t want you to think there’s any awkwardness on our end, but I don’t want to pressure you either-”

“Kuroo,” Daichi has to say with gentle firmness, “it’s okay. You can ask your question.”

For the slightest of moments, it seems like Kuroo is going to say something else, his amber eyes caught on Daichi’s the way they used to when they were walking home from the bar and circling around each other in another silly argument over something trivial just for the thrill of the fight. But it passes just as quickly, and he rakes a hand through his bangs before nodding.

“Yeah, you know how I get when I’m anxious. Um, yeah, so I just wanted to ask you in person if you’d like to come to the wedding. With a plus one if you want, of course. I feel like we’ve fallen out of touch recently, and it felt too impersonal to start reaching out again over a piece of paper.” He glances down at the table, just a flicker of his eyes betraying his nerves, before he gathers the iron resolve Daichi has always known him to have and meeting Daichi’s gaze again.

Daichi had always admired that willpower, had come to love it. Some part of him still does, perhaps.

“I’d love to. I’m happy for you, Tetsurou,” Daichi says warmly, and the worst part is that it’s true. He really is happy that Kuroo could find the person he was meant to be with. “Aki seems wonderful, and I’m looking forward to the chance to finally meet.”

Kuroo still brightens with the same glow as he always did whenever receiving good news. “Yeah? That’s great! It’ll be awesome to have you there; Bokuto and the others will be stoked. I missed this – hanging out with you. It’s been too long.”

“Hey, we’ve both been busy. But you’re right, we could make more of an effort. How about after all the excitement from your honeymoon period dies down a little? We’ll get together with the old group.”

“Well, be careful who you invite. Some of them are lightweights in their old age now.”

“I think I’m more scared of the ones who can still party as hard as they used to,” Daichi says with a grin. Kuroo gives another awful laugh, and some uneven part of their relationship slips back into place where it should be, where it had always been.

(There’s no way they can see the meteor shower in Tokyo, but they climb up to the roof of their apartment anyway, hoping to catch silver dust glimpses streaking across the sky before blinking out of existence.

The night is already warm as it is, for an early summer day, but Daichi lies close to Kuroo anyway, their bare arms pressed right against each other on top of the blanket they’d thrown across the hard roof tile.

A few times, they sit up in excitement, thinking they’d caught a falling star, but it would almost always turn out to be a star of the city’s making instead: lamps and lights reflecting into the sky. Now, they’re just lying still, trading stories about what they used to think they could find in space when they were children.

“Tetsurou,” Daichi whispers, trying not to disturb the patterns of quiet and noise that mesh together to make the city ambience that surrounds them. Overhead, another fleeting sparkle of white vanishes before Daichi can even realize he saw it.

“Daichi,” Kuroo whispers back, squeezing his hand once. His eyes glow like autumn in the dark, more real than any light in the city. “What’s up?”

“I think...I think that I could stay here with you forever.”

Beneath the canvas of Tokyo’s lights, Kuroo leans over to kiss Daichi ever so softly at the corner of his mouth.

“I’d like that.”)

#kurodaiweek #kurodai #kuroo tetsurou #sawamura daichi #haikyuu!! #hq fic #post-breakup #my fic

[analyticalargumentessay358]

college papers

About me

Original Essays

Original Essays Writing and writing one thing something nicely will have a huge time discrepancy even if each writings are the same size. Just as a result of you are able to finish one thing quickly doesn’t imply that’s the easiest way to do it. You would possibly want your essay to be written rapidly, but when it’s an essential essay, taking your time will give you a greater finished product. It’s higher to seek out that you’ve still obtained time left over than to expire of time and find yourself dashing issues off with a looming deadline. If you’re writing for grades and want a good one, you need a really good essay. Some of us can simply skim a chunk and pick up all of the salient points. Others must read with more consideration, and even re-learn a piece a number of occasions to extract the knowledge we want. Having good reading and comprehension abilities makes writing much sooner because you’re capable of “get” the facts sooner and organize them better. Now you understand why you had to do so many studying comprehension tests at college. Effective recommendation for making a fantastic research, term & midterm paper. The introduction and conclusion only have to be a paragraph every. They should be mirrors of one another in structure, however not in phrases. The beginning of the introduction ought to embody a hook, followed by a bridge to the thesis, then the thesis. Don’t start writing it the day earlier than you have to hand it in. Try and get your first draft down at least a day or two before you must submit your work. Read your essay aloud to your self, since this will help you pick up any careless errors you wouldn’t in any other case spot. Furthermore, I was required to signal the document as properly to indicate that I also had read and understood the insurance policies. Ideas,ideas,tutorials,essay papers– everything we'd’ve liked to have recognized, seen or heard throughout our excessive-college & UNI years, we wish to deliver to YOU. Shorter essays will be combined and paid as one to make as much as a thousand phrases. The conclusion ought to restate the thesis, then embrace some review from the paper. EduBirdie is your one-cease-shop for enhancing and proofreading! We have an expansive database of editors who might help hone and perfect your tutorial paper, eliminating all grammar and syntax mistakes alongside the best way. ” For some, it'll solely take a couple of months while for others it'll take a lifetime. it additionally is dependent upon the type of writing you’re doing. Some writing is straightforward and fast and other writing is tough and requires big amounts of research. Research, first draft writing, modifying, and rewriting are all a part of the writing course of. I think the time it takes to do all of them must be counted in the time it takes. Check to see in case your information flows logically from one level to the next and make sure that you’ve introduced your information clearly. The extra in-depth your report is meant to be, the longer you need to spend on it. I can often analysis and write a fairly technical magazine article of 1,000 phrases in three hours, however do remember that I’m an expert writer. We will ignore essays that we suspect are mass-produced or spin. Optionally, you'll be able to include samples of papers or copies of sources in your order. If it's not important, you possibly can go away it up to the writer. Your professor can let you know whether or not it’s acceptable to reuse or rework components of old assignments. On an internet platform prospects can create private accounts through which they will manage all transactions and pending bids. Much like how prospects on platform can rate sellers that they’ve immediately purchased products from, we only use real testimonials from customers who’ve actually obtained a finished essay. They are mendacity, in fact, but that may be a moral issue, not a authorized one. Legally, the scholar is, nearly actually, breaking their dedication to the institution to produce authentic work.

[thisisthemostimportantidea724]

college papers

About me

Essay Writer & Essay Writing Service

Essay Writer & Essay Writing Service If you need to use an essay writing assist then the one Edubirdie offers is superb. I am not sturdy with English written text, so using this site was a blessing. Your satisfaction is what we value most, and we undoubtedly gained’t let you get in bother with professors. ” If you’re a student, you’re likely to ask this query no less than sometimes. Everyone has skilled a state of affairs the place they received tons of assignments on numerous topics, and doing all of them on time could be troublesome. You might lack time or feel underwhelmed, however the deadline is operating close, and the school teacher isn’t going to be forgiving. They start googling, hoping to find someone who will do homework for them at inexpensive costs. This isn’t a common rule of thumb as many bilingual writers excel at international writing, but we’ve seen that domestic fluency can influence shopper rates. However, they also have native purchasers that frequently rent them and don’t low-ball them. They are working a enterprise based mostly on relationships whereas eliminating worldwide penny pinchers. Often occasions when corporations hire throughout the pond, they are doing so to value-cut—particularly abroad writers. Local sustainability – Finding native shoppers who need great writers can yield terrific outcomes. As we’ve mentioned above with locational charges, native speakers can usually cost extra for native content material. Cultural nuances and sensitivities can impression writing pace and relevancy. The expertpaperwriter.com website does not and cannot present evaluations of all writing services within the trade. There are different companies you can use alongside these examined by our group. The Virtual Learning Resources Center is an online index hosting 1000's of scholarly websites, all of that are selected by academics and librarians from around the globe. Department of Education, the Educational Resources Information Center is a great software for academic research with more than 1.3 million bibliographic information of articles and online supplies. ERIC supplies entry to an intensive physique of schooling-associated literature including journal articles, books, research syntheses, conference papers, technical reviews, policy papers and extra. With more than eight million searches every month, it’s no wonder why this search engine is a good web supply for education. With its minimalist design, Refseek doesn’t seem like a lot. However, the engine pulls from over one billion internet pages, encyclopedias, journals and books. It is much like Google in its performance, except that it focuses more on scientific and educational outcomes—which means more results will come from .edu or .org websites, as well as on-line encyclopedias. It also has an option to go looking documents directly—offering quick access to PDFs of educational papers. With so many resources on-line, it’s hard to narrow it down and find ones that are not solely reliable and useful, but also free for college students. We’ve saved you the time and picked out our 15 greatest free search engines like google and yahoo for research. The Open Access Button began when a group of students obtained uninterested in hitting paywalls. To repair the broken system, they launched The Open Access Button was launched in November 2013, leveraging public repositories of analysis papers to make publicly funded analysis accessible to all. We will discover the author who can handle the duty for you since we have an enormous database of writers who focus on different fields of research. That means, we are able to find the one who can embark in your task and make in with that skilled contact you'd wish to see in your finished work. You plan to use to a school or a uni of your dreams and need a clever, partaking essay that’ll stand out? Each of the assignments produced by our writers is proofread and double-checked for plagiarism. Besides, examine your work for plagiarism yourself through the use of our free plagiarism checker. She let me know at each stage what she was working on and he or she used the sources that I supplied. Latest news, guides and our approaches to finding the best paper writing service. Very strict refund coverage which can not please everybody. That’s right, the writers need to be paid for the work they completed, however how to ensure that you didn’t waste money for a plagiarized paper? Especially, when the platform has a scamy status because of the dual web sites. While the compensation may influence the order by which hyperlinks and knowledge seem on our platform, it doesn't affect the way we analyze and evaluation writing providers. Please, do not consider the order in which we publish links and information on our web site as a promotion.

[inevitably-johnlocked]

Hi, Loving the blog my darling ❤️ Currently starting uni at the grand age of 21 with absolutely no clue what I’m doing in life. My mental health has really been tough and I feel as though everything is going wrong 😩 I just can’t fathom how people find out who they are or what they enjoy - life just seems to be one big grumpy ball determined to knock you over 😓 any grand life advice you Wish you’d been given or things you think everyone should be aware of? ❤️❤️❤️

Hi Nonny! *HUGS* 

First off, I’m so sorry I put this off so long... I’ve had a headache for a few days and it’s hard for me to give good responses when I do.

That said, I’m not a professional, so please use your own judgement after some of your own research

First of all, don’t feel bad about starting college “late”... there’s NO SUCH THING as too old to learn. I also started at 21, and there were people in my classes on their “second career” (in Ontario, the gov’t used to offer grants for people who were laid off and wanted to pursue higher learning in a second career; not sure if they still do that). I was also in the same boat you were: I had no idea where my life was going to lead, I just knew that if I wanted to work in a professional field, I needed college, and I literally chose my career path by browsing the course offerings at the college I wanted to go to.

In hindsight, MAKING THE EFFORT TO GO TO SCHOOL was a huge first step in a new direction I was terrified to make, and so I totally understand WHY you’re scared, and coupled with mental health issues I can’t begin to imagine the levels of stress you’re feeling. So, I think when you first start (or just before you begin) look into your college’s counselling services; it’s part of your tuition and they’re there to help you get through your schooling. Every college and uni have their own websites, and if you’re willing to dig deep enough (actually, just go to their “site map”, it’s supposed to link every single page their website has), you can find faculty emails and information about counselling services offered and / or any restrictions they have. I highly recommend you start there, try to get an appointment early since many people will be doing it as well. Write out some concerns you have, and bring them with you when you go to see your counsellor. Also, make sure you find out if it’s a life counsellor vs a career counsellor... actually, I just had a thought, all unis and colleges (in Canada at least) have an on-site health centre which actually may be the best place to start for your mental health resource quest. THEY may be able to direct you in the right direction for that aspect. BUT since you’re not sure what you want to do with your career, I do still suggest seeing a counsellor who can help you understand what you can do with your chosen degree / diploma. Doing that may help ease your stress about that. 

Next, let’s tackle the “find out what they enjoy” aspect of your ask: I TOTALLY feel you on the grumpiness, I really do. Even today, nearly 2 decades after my own college life, I’m constantly grumpy and stressed. And I’m not going to tell you to “just think positive!” because that’s ridiculous, and it’s more complicated than just that, and poo-poo to anyone who tries to tell you otherwise. For me, I think it was just trying to do things I never would have, and being brave and talking to people in my classes. My best friends inevitably are the ones I made in college, because we have a lot in common and we did a lot of new things together. I suggest maybe reaching out and doing the same! Colleges and unis ALWAYS have some sort of groups going on, like LGBT, Anime, movies, hiking, etc. TRY THEM ALL. Have fun! Be daring! Most of those types of groups plan outings and activities either for free or at low-cost, and who knows, you may find out you enjoy something you never thought you would! If you spend all your free time just studying or doing school work, you’re gonna burn out before the first semester is over, trust me on this one. 

First year is PURPOSELY the hardest year, just as a word of warning, because they need to weed out those who aren’t serious about doing the program – they don’t want to waste your time and money just as much as you don’t, believe it or not. I’m not going to sugar coat that for you at all... I almost failed first year, but finding a good balance between school and personal activities as well as discussing concerns I had with my professors, I was able to pick my grades up and make it through to second year... and it actually got a LOT easier in second and third year, because the professors were marking us on quality as opposed to technique. Sure, I pulled my share of all nighters, but mostly because I am the WORLD’S WORST PROCRASTINATOR. 

So my tip: if you’re a procrastinator, get that shit out of your system, because spending all night painting colour-matching squares on illustration board is legit the un-funnest way to spend a Sunday night when I had all week to do it. Some people work better under pressure (I actually do, strangely enough) but if you don’t have the mental ability to handle the stress, I really, REALLY recommend you DON’T PROCRASTINATE. Keep a day planner to help you sort your work vs personal time, and you should be just fine. 

Hmm, what else? 

Don’t forgo food, for the love of god. Groceries are cheaper than eating out, so learn to cook simple things: Pasta is literally boiled water and noodles, and canned sauce. That’s literally under 10$ for a few days’ worth of food. It’s delicious and keeps you full and alert to get on with your days. 

As I said above, schools have a health centre with FULL medical services, at least in Canada. Take full advantage of their services since you’re paying for it. Get check ups, talk to nurses about your mental health, and get recommendations to local therapists if you feel you need more than what the on-campus ones can offer; recommendations with doctor’s notes gets you reduced rates for therapy, if I recall correctly (please correct me if I’m wrong, lovelies).

Most schools also have gym memberships paid-for in your tuition; ours was a branch of the YMCA good at ANY YMCA in Canada, and we could use the on-campus gym any time of the day or night. TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THIS. Physical activity helps promote the natural endorphins in your body which help you feel better mentally. It doesn’t have to be anything strenuous: when I first started, I just did one hour on the recliner bike every day. It made me feel better and encouraged me to try other things in the gym, like the treadmill and weights. I found out I actually like working out a few times a week. I do it for ME, not for anyone else. Don’t do it “to be thin” or whatever (that’s a WHOLE other heap of garbage I’m not getting into here). Do it because it makes your mind happy. The gym is an EXCELLENT place to sort out your thoughts and plan your week ahead. The benefit to the recliner bike is that you can have a book or something and jot notes down while getting the exercise in.

DON’T PROCRASTINATE, like I said above. 

Get a part-time job if you find yourself needing something to do with some time you have. Some schools have a student-job centre where you can work on-campus for the print centre or student union, or you can just get a 8 to 16 hours-a-week job like at a grocery store (which is what I did) which wasn’t stressful at all because it was cleaning and food prep; it will look good on your resume that you can multitask like that, having a job and school at the same time, and job skills are transferrable to school as well :) Most part-time jobs will accommodate your school schedule.

HAVE FUN. Seriously, college were the best years of my life, not because I was out drinking every weekend (I actually WASN’T), but because I gained a lot of valuable life experiences from my time away, and I made amazing friends and a lot of my favourite memories were the activities we did together. We did a lot of hiking trips together, and I loved those.

Not much else I can say, Nonny, really, other than it’s perfectly normal to be scared and worried about your future. That’s why taking some time out to sit down and make yourself a schedule will help you handle it. I believe in you and I really REALLY think you will have a great time in college. So exciting, moving onto the next chapter of your life!

Good luck, Nonny, and I love you!

#steph replies #life advice #my advice #college and uni #keep us updated lovely! #Anonymous

[taytayize123]

A Challenge

This was requested by @niallhoranusa Where, Frat Boy Niall is into Y/N but she doesn’t give him the time of day until one night.. 

Rating: Smut 

It was the beginning of freedom for Y/N it was her first day at Uni she was so nervous it felt like there we’re butterflies swimming around in her stomach as she entered her first lecture of the day. It was a business course speciality in marketing which was the field that interested her the most. Her dream was to be a CEO of a large company to create products she herself loved and were proud of. As she sat down in a open seat she begins to take out her laptop, a notebook, and a pen. She was prepared for the day that was one thing she always was which is very organized to the point where sometimes her friends laughed at her lack of adventurous skills. She didn’t care because deep down she knew what she wanted and their wasn’t gonna be anything to get in her way. 

The first, sighting of him was when he sat behind her. She knew he had his eyes on her as his friend talked about the next big football match that was coming up. Niall leans forward and says, “Hey sweetheart do you happen to have a pen?” I giggle at his stupidity like serious it’s the first day of class and you don’t have something to write with what a typical jock. I nicely, handed him an extra pen I had but didn’t say a single word. I could tell he was taken aback by my lack of interest in him because come on he’s a jock he has girls waiting for the chance he looks in their direction but I sure as hell wasn’t gonna be one of them. During, the lecture I could hear his friend whispering jokes about how Niall got burned by a girl the first day of class and if this keeps up he’ll never get laid again. I snicker to myself as I slide down in my seat to start typing up the homework assignment. I had a feeling that this wasn’t gonna be my only interaction with him. The weeks passed by with him attempting to speak to me at any time in class I could see how much he flirted with all the other girls on campus and didn’t want any part of this player type dude he was acting like. Sadly, though we had been spending more time together because we we’re paired up to do a project together which somehow I think he was being sneaky and must have paid off the TA to put us together because our professor said he choose them based on our latest marks on our last chapter test. I scored high earning an A and Niall earned a C+ at best so I knew something was up.. 

After class, Niall and Y/N sat and talked about how they wanted to create this make believe product they had to create and market towards a certain age group. Lucky for us, we got ages 18-24 which are most normal college aged students so we knew that whatever we created we could sell at sport events, party’s, and other events that we happening on campus through out the month. Everything was going pretty well until Niall cancelled the meeting with Y/N to go over plans on the design of said product which was an app that told the user where the best rated bars and clubs were including line wait times, reviews on food, and the overall vibe of the place. In our minds the idea of Yelp but used for the club scene! The meeting was cancelled because Niall had football practice at the time we agreed to meet at instead of just meeting at a different time he had me meet him on the field sitting on the benches with my book bag filled with my laptop, paper designs about how the app will look, and tons of reviews on the bars and clubs near and around campus. He waved at me from the field as I sat down. I frowned giving him a death stare and started typing away to pass the time. Practice ended and he ran up shirtless totally and completely covered in sweat then gave me a hug that was unwanted on my half as I pushed him away giving him this WTF look like dude ew! Not only did I wait a whole two hours for him to finish practice but now he’s only talking about some stupid Frat party his mates were throwing on Saturday and I should totally come and can talk about our project. I glared at him, “excuse me you really think I’m dumb enough to think we will actually talk about the project at some frat party that’s filled with booze, drugs, and half naked girls?” Niall smirks at me. “Yes, we can come on just go we will have a good time! Don’t get you’re panties in a bunch just have some fun for once.” I gave him my best resting bitch face as I agreed because I wasn’t gonna get a shit grade just because this frat boy just wants to party all the time. 

Thankfully, I convinced two friends to go with me not only did I agree to go too his frat houses party but now my friends dressed me to the nines in this body con dress in a beautiful deep midnight blue color paired with a striking pair black stilettos. My deep chocolate brown hair curled perfectly flowing down my back. Make up just enough to bring out my natural features. I was as ready as I will ever be... We entered the huge house. Music blasting at full blast, the smell of pot and boozed punched my nose as I take a deep breathe and walk towards the bar with my friends to grab a drink. Maybe a few seconds goes by as my two friends drift into the sea of people dancing the night away. I sigh knowing this was a dumb idea. Why was I even still here? Yes, that’s right because of Niall who just walked up to me and asked me to “dance” with him. I looked at my two friends who happened to be grinding on two footballers that we’re also friends with Niall their faces filled with excitement and happiness I choose to take the metaphor stick out of my ass and give in and go dance with Niall. He takes my hand and drags me to the middle of the room. He places his hands on my hips as I’m slowly circling my hips against his body beginning to enjoy myself. The song “I’m N Luv (Wit A Stripper) by T-pain comes on the stereo everyone freaking out because this song is still a jam whenever it comes on. I start working my moves on Niall digging my booty against him sliding up and down his toned body that was covered by a pair of cargo shorts, a black v neck tee that showed off his chest hair, and a pair of toms. A typical jock fashion statement but for some reason I didn’t hate him as much as I did when I first met him. Perhaps, it’s the blunt we smoked and the many drinks we downed before even starting to dance with each other. I snap out of my thoughts as I feel Niall lean into my ear and say, “You move your hips like that one more time I will fireman carry you upstairs and show you who’s really in control.” I gulp, feeling turned on so I choose to slow down for a minute but speed up as soon as the chorus of the song started back up. I slide up and down one more time until he threw me off his shoulder and physically removed me from the party. He plopped me down on the bed kissing my lips tasting like vodka and expensive men’s aftershave. I realized I liked it. We soon we making out as I sat on his lap on this bed that I hoped was his. I got ahead of myself and stripped off his clothes until he was sitting their in his Calvin’s looking like a damn model. His chest toned, abs shaped like god craved them himself, and on god, that boy was hiding something huge in those white Calvin’s and I couldn’t stand it anymore until, Niall flipped us over so I was on my back as he removed my dress, bra, and thong I was laying their naked for his pleasure. His eye’s we’re black with lust his once bring blue eyes I knew were gone switched for a midnight blue that matched the dress I use to have on my body that now Niall had total control of and I wanted more. Niall told me I was gonna suck him off I grinned like a child being told their were gonna get ice cream. Funny thing, about ice cream is that when it’s hot it melts well, I got to work I opened my mouth took him in and began sucking lightly well, Niall didn’t want to be teased so he grabbed my hair thrusting himself deep down my throat causing me to gag. He grinned. It got beyond messy fast. Split from my mouth dribbling down my chin mixing with his pre-cum tasted like heaven I was so drunk in lust with this greek god of a man I just wanted all of him no matter how much pain I may have been in. Niall speeds up and says: “ Come on, Sweetheart that’s it you take my cock so well like it was meant to be in your mouth.” “That’s right, you little slut suck until you have tears running down your face because you can hardly breathe cause my big cock is deep down in your throat and soon will be balls deep in you’re wet, warm, and snug pussy I bet right now that’s what you want most hun?” I could feel my own juices running down my thigh as I bit the tip ever so slightly which caused Niall’s hips to buckle and his tasty cum shooting out of his cock deep down my throat coating it as if a chocolate is melting from the heat of your mouth. I open my mouth letting Niall’s cock slip out of my mouth he grabs me and flips us over both of us laying on our backs gaining our breath back and our heart rates slow down he turns to me propping himself up on his elbow smirking at me saying, “Oh sweetheart that was the best blow job I’ve ever had now did you think that I wouldn’t repay the favor? Now, open those pretty legs for me girl now it’s my time to get to hear my name come from those perfectly pouty lips over and over again.” 

#niall horan smut

[macyinmotion]

testing the waters

I feel like this should be the start of something, now, in this specific moment, because I’m feeling like it is truly the end of some very wonderful things. 

For starters, my best friend is moving on. I never really knew what it would feel like when she did, because I guess I never really realized how much I depended on her; we talked, we fantasized, I ranted, she listened, and it worked. It was a friendship that worked so unbelievably well, I hadn’t even recognized how fucking natural it was. On the contrary, I definitely took for granted how much I needed her, and how much I’d miss her. I mean, I’m thrilled that she is finding her groove in college-life and engaging in all the wild shenanigans she missed out on in high school — I just wish I could’ve been there to watch her enjoy it. 

Another thing driving me crazy is how much I miss another one. Or rather, how much of her I feel I’m missing out on… it’s like, she’s gained this brand new sense of self, and she’s finally letting herself be the girl I always knew was in there, and I don’t get to see it! I am so proud of how she’s growing up, and the fact that she’s letting herself live and enjoy small moments even when she knows they won’t last. She used to overthink everything, always looking too far ahead, always dwelling too long on the potential consequences of what she was about to say, and now — I think it’s safe to say she doesn’t give a fuck. She knows she looks amazing, she knows she’s hella fun, and she’s owning it. 

Yet, however proud I am of my beautiful best friends, I’m almost feeling jealous of how quickly they’re moving, and I think that’s because I feel stuck. I’ve never stayed still this long in my entire life; I’m not used to being stationary, sleeping in, having to think up ways to spend my day rather than having my day spend itself before I’d even gotten a chance to breathe. It’s hard for me, seeing them laughing and smiling, and knowing it’s their turn to feel that way but also wanting desperately to feel it with them. 

Which brings me to him. In my best words, he makes being stationary feel okay. His existence isn’t earth-shattering like that one from Boston, nor is it completely without a future like… all the others. He makes me smile, which is good — that’s like, a baseline for what someone should do for you. He also makes me think, and makes me laugh, and makes me push my own boundaries. 

Like, sitting on his roof — or back up to climbing up on to his roof, that’s an even better visual: I’m not a physical-risk-taker. I don’t scale the rocks if there’s a likelihood I’ll fall, and I don’t jump into the water because there’s a chance it could hurt. But I didn’t think twice about following him up that ladder, and I didn’t think twice when he lit a cigarette and asked me about my life. I just, did it. 

So, yeah, he pushes me. Which is a change of pace, because he doesn’t push me in small-town ways. He’s not, “c’mon, just sneak out, your parents will never know” —  he’s, “let’s go off-roading and smoke a cigarette on top of that mountain.” Which, I’ll admit, is refreshing. But he doesn’t make me reconsider leaving, not in the slightest, and for that I’m grateful. 

I cannot imagine how devastating it would’ve been to have fallen in love here. 

Truthfully, I’m stoked to be moving; I don’t think I could get out of here fast enough, because while it is refreshing and comforting to be resting up in such a beautiful place, any longer would drive me insane. 

I crave stress: the emotion and dedication of studying, learning, producing things. I miss the deadlines and the red pens, and although I know uni is going to be a very rude awakening and I am definitely going to flounder, I still cannot wait to begin. It’s too easy, being here, drinking coffee on the beach while the dogs chase those damn migratory rat-birds. I want to be overwhelmed, pushing myself to do things I’m uncomfortable doing, making new friends and trying out new identities and different ways of carrying myself. I want to say something wrong to a professor and have them make some comment about “those damn Americans,” and I want to learn from that. 

That’s my problem with being here, is that I’m not learning. Which is why this has to be the something new that starts. I have to put words to paper again, or I’ll explode, I could feel It happening. I was imploding, every beautiful sunset and brilliant smile from him, all I wanted to do was write about it, and I felt like I couldn’t. It was driving me mad, but now it doesn’t have to. 

He texted me tonight, explaining why he hasn’t been responding well — but I knew he didn’t like texting, that’s why I never expected much, so I’m okay with that. I just, sort of can’t wait to be in a place where I’m expected to meet people, where I don’t have to make excuses to get coffee with someone, and where I can explore what I really want without anything holding me back.   

Now that I know where I’m going, for sure, I feel giddy. I thought I already knew, and knew what it felt like to be excited about it, but it seems now that I was holding my breath. It’s like, when that email came through saying I’d met my conditions, that was the moment all of my hard work paid off, not back when I got the scores. I knew the scores were good, because I knew I’d worked hard. Getting that confirmation, though — that validation that I was qualified to be where I’d always seen myself going — that was when it hit me. All of those hours studying and worrying, every single cup of coffee consumed in a vain attempt to seem as if I was prepared for whatever I was engaging in that day. Sometimes, I wish I knew how much of it was completely unnecessary — how much of it was just fluff, just bullshit verbiage on a resume that didn’t actually impact the hiring decision. But then I think, no. None of it was bullshit, because all of it taught me something and none of it taught me nothing. Everything I did had a purpose, an end game — even if that end game was just, disciplining myself to do boring, trivial things for the sake of doing them. 

Like, Pony Club. I could have just as easily ridden horses on my own, gone to competitions, learned my life lessons and not dealt with all the stress and trauma of ratings. After all, ponies were my hobby, not my career move. Nevertheless, I did the ratings, and I earned my certifications, and I don’t regret a second of it because every time I tied that goddamn stock-tie and shined those boots, every time I said the wrong thing to the wrong instructor and found myself on the end of a “you can’t simplify it like that” lecture that ends with me cantering 15 meter circles with my pinkies tied to my saddle, no stirrups, shouting Katy Perry’s “Firework” to the tune of the national anthem to prove you can, in fact, multitask — every time I picked myself up out of the dirt and swung my leg back over, I was solidifying a huge piece of my make-up. When I wiped my tears and simply tried again, and again, and again, and again, and again I was creating a person who refused to give in no matter the pressure. 

And that’s who I am. I don’t give in. Even though this time in my life is full of crazy and chaos and uncertainty, I won’t fall back on my old tricks just to avoid a bit of a fight, because all of the shit I did to get here taught me how to throw the first punch. 

#rambling #moving #bigthings #college #uni #learning #building #trying #succeeding #guessing #perfection

[a-memoir-of-me-blog]

imma not even proof read this....but this is a convo again, before i even met my true love

Texts to x:

idk what i was talking about....i think US and education and free education

*sent a pic from usnews.com*

“Wiener Professor of Social Policy at Harvard Kennedy School, believes that the last 30 years of rising American inequality can be attributed to three key factors:

The US government does ‘considerably less’ than comparable democracies to even out disposable family incomes, Jencks says. And current state and local tax policies ‘actually increase income inequality’ (in america, yeah, because people in low income areas dont use this to their advantage--future writings will make this make more sense. This is from december 2016 or january 2017...dont remember).

‘All the costs and risks of capitalism seem to be shifted largely to those who work rather than those who invest’, he said

Compounding the economic imbalance is the unlikely prospect that those at the bottom can ever improve their lot.”

Me: shouldnt that mean that not only should we work. But invest [in things that can help us develop--ex: infrastructure companies, and all things that benefit to the public--instead of the government being a monopoly, we (markets, the people) will put in our money to companies we like that we believe will be the best for us, and just let us give money to all these companies, that will work together since theyre all gonna do the same thing and we all just want the same thing, and they can just collaborate and make the best that they can. And then we didnt have to pay taxes and not know where it is going. In a sense, investing in companies is like paying taxes, but more transparent and more control of where your money goes--which is to support a company to do x,y,z to help benefit your community and/or country]? But like….thats not taught in school because they want to keep the power limited to only a few and not the masses (the markets, the people who all gather and pool their money in all of these companies that will then go to work together and make the best thing they can make) lol. Oh america…

*pic from same thing*

“Hendren, along with Harvard economists Katz and Raj Chetty, now at Stanford Uni, looked at the lasting effects of moving children to better neighborhoods as part of Moving to Opportunity, a short-lived federal housing program from the ‘90s. Their analysis, published in May, found that the longer children are exposed to better environments, the better they do economically in the future. Whichever city or state children grow up in also radically affects whether they will move out of poverty, he said”

Me:Power of association!! And media flaunts the “low-income” area lifestyle...and they keep the cycle going! Gotta learn the system (the cycle). Exploit it. Give back to education and other welfare shit [but only let them pay if they 1. Waste our help 2. Are greedy 3. Keep fucking up more than enough times that we can afford--which i assume is where an actuary would come in--keep reading because i mention more to this with prison, media, college tuition]. BUT. I think the the biggest thing to give back is knowledge (of surroundings, their influence, give them power to empower them, let them be them and not what media makes them want to be, not what their surroundings want them to be) and the confidence and the belief that we all can come together and learn of ourselves, our difference (and explain to one another why--but it always goes down to that we are human and just want to survive) and to learn to get the power from within us already, and use that and use things we learn and use them for good. Use this and that part of what the world offers and tie them together and make it for the good of all. Knowledge of self, history, psychology, cycles is power. Power over our human. Our flaws and ego and pride.

Me: we think that public things arent ours (when they literally are--we share them--it was our taxes--so that the government can do this and make it available for us--but yeah, it has no explicit value--we paid with taxes--we will think it is not worth it and not good--but thats where people who do value this PUT THEIR OWN VALUE IN IT. then they abuse it and fuck it up for everyone and as a result….we wasted….as a result, we inflate. As a result, we fucked ourselves over. We as people in a democracy rely on one another...so stop stealing. Stop wasting. And with this mindset, then we know we are obligated to have it and it is evenly given to us (because we gave it to ourselves!) and we help not just other people, but you help yourself.

Me: however the only issue i see is that middle class people who are really trying their hardest to survive out here are definitely the ones who deserve more. (Their market is getting smaller, but they are paying more (is it because it will then add more people to middle class? But those below us dont use it to their true full advantage to educate themselves and move up from their surroundings and change their lifestyle around). And thats where middle class working people will then have to cut down on keeping their minds and bodies healthy--they overwork with unhealthy food--that makes them lose money and unhealthy--and that makes them become poorer and poorer. We ALL can do something about this. And i think that for working class middle class people, they shouldnt get health insurance benefits--but rather things to AVOID getting it, because 1) they are still getting unhealthy because they are still in the system and 2) continues for them to keep paying into these things--and instead pay to innovations in food, and making sure the planet is okay, there isnt an imbalance in one thing that can tip something and cause a famine or extreme weather or a drought or have too many certain animals and how that can throw off the whole ECOSYSTEM.) their quality is getting worse and worse because they have to settle for less (government stuff--which we give to) and they are paying more and more (...so instead of doing that....instead of getting food from this and that with harmful things on them...instead of making yourself sick, give yourself life! Ensure yourself and your health and your life...or you can make your own company and run your own self sustaining home and life and have balance--and teach others, and give to them). We cant even buy good things for a good quality life. Housing. Goods. Etc. like. Food is the BEST remedy and preventor. Get healthy food and you keep your health. Its worth spending your money on that, instead of then having to spend it on things mentioned before. Same with education and spreading knowledge and ideas and giving it all back. Because it is a chain reaction. We are all interdependent. Be smart. Be empowered. Give yourself power. Get rid of the money. Dont be afraid to let go of that bc if you dont, you are afraid of your true life. Give live and power to yourself. Get health. Make sure you are healthy. Eat healthy. Live healthy. Feed your brain healthy things. If you have to, live in a shitty area for cheap, but your environment doenst define you. What you put into yourself (that true life) is what defines you. You can define yourself.

Me: and because they get taxed so much, ppl cant afford to go to school because they are just trying to make it alive (and they get stuck in there. And they go to drugs. They go to crime. They go to temporary satisfaction. They get a girl pregnant and they cycle continues and/or gets worse.

Him: yeah but knowledge costs money a majority of the time. Education costs thousands. GOOD education reaches the hundred thousands (my reply rn: UMMMM. Doesnt matter!! That is subjective!!! Life is always the same! But it depends on the PERSON! Do you find value in something because you put your efforts in it? Someone can have a SHITTY life, but they can either learn from it, or let it USE THEM and OVERPOWER them. They are giving their circumstances the power over them, when they can take that circumstance, learn from it, gather knowledge and ideas and MAKE IT BETTER FOR THEMSELVES!)

Him: i agree we should fund our own shit (my reply rn: yeah we should, but then whatever we get...USE THE BEST OF IT, even if it is small, because you are gaining experience and knowledge and you can take it all and add it all up to make it enough for you!)

Me: like people arent making enough. So they cant rely on the government alone. They need to learn the system (aka take what they were given. Use the lessons. Take it all apart. Rebuild it to make it better for yourself...afterall...the system is there because you let them….so make the most of it...spend more money on healthy food...spend more money on books. Spend more money on travel. Spend more on living! Everythingggg is interdependent)

Him: public water fountains, parks, etc...would be so much cooler and cleaner. How would you use the system? If you dont control the system? (ummm….i have control over myself...i dont let the hate, and greed, and all those 7 sins all around me corrupt me). If you wanted to control the system (which i dont at all. I want to liberate people from their fears that they feed into them and then provide a solution to get money off of them and repeat it….we can innovate without having the extremes happen...see one flaw and fix it! Before the whole thing collapses!) you need to be the one giving the government money and that requires hundreds of millions (unless we all stop living in the grid and in the system that they made for us and be more self reliant on life sustaining things and happiness….then we dont need money...at all lol). We could have it all if all our tax dollars didnt go to war (which is the extremes that happen….but we let things keep falling and getting worse…)

Me: so then they can 1) afford to live. Not just live and make it. But to have a healthy good quality life that they can actually enjoy 2) fund a better education for kids, aka, the future of our country and our world. (so we dont get stuck in the cycle) and we need NEW ideas. Because were stuck in a patriarchal and oligarchy society (which i will write about later on about how females were actually the ones who run the world--and we still do--but it is the man who is given too much power and wants more and more and then will attack their giver and keep all of the incoming ones down) ALSO! READ MY SHIT! MY STUFF THAT I WROTE IN ENGLISH CLASS! Because I do mention that we can educate more people and improve the country in the long term. Instead of sending them to war with bad weapons and for a temporary profit that is only good for the short term and for one side. But for the long term? And the longer and wider term? It doesnt work. And it sucks for not just america, but then any other place we connect with through trade and all that other stuff and it gives us the result of having to shoot ourselves back down. Whatever we do short term, comes back in the long run in a bad way.

Him: and there hasnt been a new system of eons. Capitalisn, facism, democracy, and communism is the best humanity has been able to do. Yeaeh we can do a lot more than 50% of our taxes going to us lol

Me: Communism will stop growth. And its just not in our human nature (or any nature). Because we need incentives….we need to work for an unknown set up and set it up (the bar) for ourselves and see where we go from there. We need to not just know what we get and/or dont get out of x,y,z….but its what drives us and what makes us take risks to then go to our highest point

Him: hmmm. The incentive in communism arguably could be that you want the best for everyone (MY SIDE NOTE...or they just want everyone to just be their puppets and set everything up in their way….which is close to dictatorship and totalitarianism and extreme authoritarianism….). Like you dont want anyone to be homeless so you give up your mansion for an average sized home so that maybe 10 more people can have average sized houses who never had a house. (or….we all can be given all these things….like set with all the greatest and biggest things ever...but if we dont put in the effort and the time….then that will just become smaller and smaller and we lose our own value that is already within us…..)

Me: Yeah but that wouldnt be fair if we all get the same and one does wayyyy more than someone else and they get the same. (thats like someone who is a sinner, but the more someone wastes and the more they do this and that….then it will be more repentance they need….which is imo, something that would be a good college structure. Get a set salary, and if the teacher passes x amount then they get a raise from the people who set it. However, if a student still decides to fail...then they must pay back for what the professor may have been given the raise for….or they can just pay for what they failed bc the teacher had a set tuition and gave their best to teach these kids and not let them put the knowledge to waste...it would teach kids to really apply what they are learning in the time they are given and be smarter and choose smarter, etc….because they dont want to work for x amount of time just to repay the teacher….or….students can get a stipend for their efforts and continuous good grades...which could also act as a positive praise….like there is a negative punishment where they take something someone likes to punish them….or they give them something they dont like….which is suffering something in some form). Human nature doesnt work that way. We need to change the mindset and let people think like this: do your best. Educate yourself. Empower yourself. Dont let the bad 1% of the 1% fuck u up. Try to get involved. Voice out your opinion correctly and strong and respectively and still listen to other opinions and then put that one together and then you can make a good and/or maybe better deal. And spread it

Him: but then its not fair that most people have to be at the bottom for others to be successful

Me: (ummm….started from the bottom….duhhh lol. Its the effort!). No..because we will be educated and school would be available. And tbh. We ALL have the tools we need to succeed. And yes...it will be harder for others because they started at the bottom and/or they were oppressed (and again it goes to their perseverance and their risk taking and how they calculate this and that and knowing what they want and why..because every view that is higher than where they were is always better than the one below….so never really have expectations. But go in increments of getting it done….because then you will be happy you got there, and be happy you have more than what you previously had and then you can use all that you used before, like the leftovers, and then add more to that from where you are now and then how you can get even higher...kinda like exponential growth). But they need to use the tools more resourcefully. Like yo. We got the internet. That has everything on there and it connects people and knowledge and thats just expansion waiting to happen...and the reward feeling will be beyond them. Theyll be super happy. Share and spread how. Their stories of success and it will inspire people. And thats why people think education is being wasted and not as valued as it should be anymore (because a lot do waste it and its because they are just another cycle…) people dont use it to their best advantage and they dont realize how advantageous it is, so it only SEEMS like it is getting people nowhere. AND on top of that (culture), there is a lot of entertainment and superficial things out there that distract them. And entertainment takes the education process out. I reallllyyyyy think education and learning in general is great. And i do think that entertainment can be cut down lol. Like idk. Raise prices for those things and make people get pushed out of that due to the fact they will waste mad money and time on it and not get anything in return. I actually want to be an educator. But not the typical one. Just empower people and put emphasis on autonomy and using resources out there to their best ability and even get creative about it. Emphasis on self education, reading, thinking deeper, questioning underlying things, learning outside of school, connecting things and how things affect what and who and why and how and where it all starts and what the time was and repeat that. How to actually improve things and do research and develop our own thoughts and stuff, instead of just rioting and protesting and boycotting and strikes. Instead of when there is a problem, dont fight with nothing….go make something. Because again…..that damage will be reflected in our own tax money….so really take these things and use them to make it better...i think knowledge and questioning everything you THINK you know...and wonder if it is rlly you or just what THEY want you to think (which is what DJ Khaled is trying to tell us)

*sends pic from usanews.com*

“‘Its definitely been a strategy’ to justify starving government resources, which in turn weakens it and makes it less attractive as a tool to accomplish big things, said Skocopol. ‘In an everybody-for-themselves situation, it is the better-educated and the wealthy who can protect themselves’”.

The middle paragraph tho. They already have a huge privilege to be in school. I have the internet and books too so i can even further my knowledge. However, that is not accessible to everyone. And they will be left behind and isnt it a constitutional thing that we ALL have the liberty to use things to achieve our pursuit of happiness?