#* sighs * it be like that sometimes i guess

[sciderman]

What does Loki even do in your universe?

his lokiest

#loki man. loki man. does whatever a loki can #sci speaks #I guess he does evil things sometimes . but mostly he just vibes I think . #not every character is really in my jurisdiction. there wasn’t a loki blog but. #like. I wish there was. I wish there were other blogs left in 9319… sighs. #I miss everybody. I’m so lonely. #I think the whole loki messing with deadpool and telling him he is his father definitely happened in 9319. #most of deadpool’s comics canon is canon to 9319. with some minor changes here or there. #which makes loki and wade’s sexcapades even more insane.. #but like. Wade’s sexcapades are absolutely batshit insane. #nate would frown so deeply if he knew everything wade got up to while he wasn’t looking.

[linkvcr]

Thinks abt the identity issues surrounding link and zelda post skysword and crumbles to dust

#sighs. its about the not being able to return to who you were before and also being a different person than you were #with someone who knew you so well back then #like. i think it gets a bit awkward at times bc theyre expecting eachother to act how they did before and they just dont sometimes #aughhh people that have changed but still love eachother. [claws at the wall] #like they just used to be regular ppl. and now theyre a goddess reincarnate and a hero who killed basically a diety and they just have to #learn to live with that i guess #txt #hc

[micamone]

the problem is i wanna play skyrim but i don't wanna update/fix my mod list but i don't wanna play vanilla

#so instead i'm just suffering. #my posts #sighs remembering those ''sometimes self care is doing the dishes'' post and realizes that's what this shit is #sometimes self care isn't mindlessly playing the easiest game :/ it's schleping through all of your fucked mods #and untangling them like xmas lights I guess :/

[pcktknife]

"nooo you don't want to be a vampire immortality is a burden" pshhh it's only a burden if you're boring as fuck like I could learn how become a master chef and still have the time to paint and learn instruments and party for a century like how is that a bad thing???

honestly but I did just remember how much I like italian food mm I still wanna get bit but I would be sad if I couldn't get a lil bit a garlic when I want

#sigh and i guess i like the sun on my skin sometimes or whatever 🙄 #im thinking too much about it im still down little sacrifices n all that #asks #anon #the immortality was never the problem tho like i get why other ppl dont want that it is kind of its own curse but like ....my curious nature #whats goin on past my death i wanna know im nosey lol

[bluepallilworld]

If I had the energy, motivation and skills to draw and write everything I daydream about, you'd all be done

#sillies and talkies #I would post so much #sometimes I have the ideas I have the motivation #then I'm like #yeah no #sleepy #later #sometimes I have the ideas and energy #and then #the drive to create went on a trip to the north pole #without warning #sometimes I got too many ideas and I can't choose #so I need the stars to be aligned in a very specific condition and the wind to blow at the exact speed needed so that I can draw or write #anything proper #*sighs* #delete later #vent #I guess

[lucyvaleheart]

.

#supposed to log good things #most of day was negative feelings and sadness #then. i remember feeling good #and then. tthe good went away #rreplaxed with the usual self doubt and loathing #the feelings of undesirability #the wish that i was. attractive in any way to anyone close to me that anyone wanted to. touch me #that i wasn't horrifically gross and disgusting #do the people who hold me do it out of pity? am i really so awful #pictures get a lot of praise #sometimes #less so lately #maybe the novelty of my personality has worn off #maybe seeing how broken i am #such a shambling wailing mess of a girl #....has made people realize how ugly i am #i don't know. its hard to care most nights #I'm supposed to feel better in the mornings #i don't usually #I used to #now i just feel..... dead inside #like a walking corpse #some part of me wants to make that reality #sigh. #anyway. #im sorry you had to read this whoever you are that's made it this far #it's a cry for help but my discord status says don't message me so it's. probably not gonna get much lol #.....i guess uh. if you've read this far and do want to say something you can take this tag in particular as a one time pass to do so #....i make no guarentees I'll respond but i will guarentee that i won't kill myself. at least not tonight or even any time this week

[purpeltomato]

Been a little while since i drew anything. Let me change that

#rhis looked HORRID WITH BG. IM NOT JOKING. #ive been pretty bored i cant use my computer and stuff so i guess ill be making stuff on ibis sometimes #i actually used to be like a master of ibispaint but i forgor💀 #i miss using mt drawing tablet #sigh #inanimate insanity #ii #ii 2 #ii microphone #microphone ii #ii mic #mic ii #ii taco #taco ii #screenshot redraw #inanimate insanity mic #inanimate insanity microphone #microphone inanimate insanity #inanimate insanity taco #taco inanimate insanity #girl i dont care if the lightning doesnt make sense bcuz theyre in a cave i just thought this looked cool😭 #ok i just noticed i fucked up their sizes taco is NOT that tiny but theres nothing k can do i guess she ll be tiny forever #my art

[jammboe]

Definitely worth staying up until 4am to paint this

#Ngl... She's like my main source of happiness right now. #Sometimes i look at a painting or drawing and just think... Wow i can actually do something decent #I guess i draw better when im feeling depressed. 😔 #Sigh #wanda maximoff #scarlet witch #doctor strange and the multiverse of madness #multiverse of madness #artists on tumblr #my art #digital art

[dandyshucks]

blinks tiredly. i decide "hm maybe i should try to expand my circle and step outside of it a little, lets go look at the main community tags" and im just greeted with a bunch of edgelords who think saying "fiction doesn't affect reality, don't like don't read" is peak activism and "fighting censorship". head in my hands. this is partially why i do not ever go into the community tags, my nervous system cannot handle blocking fifty weirdos every single day just so i can have a normal experience in the community tags hfdsjkl

#I HAVE SO MANY PEOPLE BLOCKED ALREADY. i am TRYING to curate my experience 😭😭😭 #and i have so many tags blacklisted fjdsjkl like. so many. every single variation of tag to do with those chuckleheads #which helps avoid them a lot of the time tbh bc it'll flag posts that ppl rb if the original post was tagged w any of those #so i can avoid rbing posts that have chuckleheads as the op most of the time #i also usually double check OP's blog before i rb stuff now bc man this place is rife with these weirdos #ANYWAYS. yes i want to try to engage w the community but i do not think i can handle it if theres gonna be so many edgelords jkdslfl #the only way i follow new ppl now is when yall do promo hour and i sometimes see a new face pop up fdsjkl #every now and then i have energy to try to engage with new ppl but its so difficult when so many ppl are such insufferable edgelords !!!! #''im the nasty pr-sh-pper your parents warned you about 😎'' cool man you sound like the most insufferably obnoxious person ever. :/ #''if you like CENSORSHIP-'' i am hitting block immediately bc u have a fundamental misunderstanding of what censorship actually is 👍 #I'M TIREDDDD WHY ARE PEOPLE SO DUMB ABOUT THIS STUFF. ''fiction doesn't affect reality'' I GUESS PROPAGANDA DOESNT EXIST THEN ???? #what a strange world they live in honestly. they dont understand how stories have served humans since the dawn of time. sighing loudly. #vent // #SORRY FOR THIS ONE IM JUST. ARGH. ppl talk abt encouraging community but i think maybe im not cut out for community #i want desperately to partake but i cannot handle it if it means dealing w all these bozos #it frustrates me to no end fdhsjkl and it upsets me so much and i wish i could deal w it better but. my nervous system is broken fdsjkl #i will try to expand my circle every now and then but i cannot do it often bc of this 😭 im not going to give up entirely though fdsjkl #(also this is partially why i dont tag my posts w community tags anymore bc i am just. so scared of these freaks getting their hands on it) #(the most i'll do is s.afeship or variations every now n then bc supposedly they're not in those tags fdsjkl) #delete later #dandyshucks

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

#im still procrastinating so bear with me #ive just been thinking abt something. like the idea of a support system #bc as a 1st year grad student ppl around me r like: it must be hard being away from ur support system or ive left my support system when i #moved halfway across the country. and like i dont really feel that way bc idk the idea of a support system is sorta odd to me #like for me i guess it would just b my parents who i kno love me but im just so weirdly asocial that i never really talk to them #like i hardly ever text them. we talk maybe every couple months. so like i guess i theoretically have support but its a bit abstract #and like i have friends i guess but again im a bit weird and dont really feel connected to ppl so i dont feel that close to anyone #surface level friendships i guess. i dunno. i just feel weird not not having a support system but also having it b hollow #i guess i cant feel it more now. like i feel like getting diagnosed as bip0lar made my problems seem more realized to my parents #like i dunno i just assumed they knew i was doing awful most of the time but maybe that wasn't the case #its such a weird thing to b diagnosed with. like the conotations feel a lot heavier and i feel like im not supposed to talk abt it to ppl #bc theyll think im unreliable or something. like it wouldnt b that big a deal if i was just depressed but the sometimes buring out of my #skin makes me somehow scarier. and i still feel conflicted bc i do have a bip0lar mood profile but i have very very high impulse control #and even when im going high my mind is still super rational about it. which seems weird bc low impulse control is common with #the diagnosis. its also y i dont fit an 4dhd profile. not that it really matters. i fit the criteria enough to be on the bip0lar spectrum #its not like someone's gonna come yell at me for not being bip0lar enough. i just feel odd about it is all #still feels fake i guess. hard to imagine feeling any different to how i feel now. which is weirdly stable. so i guess the meds r working #sigh... ok enough i need to go to sleep at 7pm so i can get up at like 2 to finish reading a paper. for some reason my god forsaken brain #works better in the early morning rip #unrelated

[cookinguptales]

.........lmao

so I was remembering the way I had to start wearing a training bra when I was like. seven or eight. and I hated wearing it so much that I would like hide it at the bottom of my drawer and try to sneak out of the house without it. (I was not allowed to go out without it, my parents were always on me about that.)

and I'd always conceptualized that as me just not liking my body being talked about the way it was now being talked about but sitting here in bed at age 33 I finally was like

wait there are times that I have to be really careful about wearing bras (or really anything that puts any pressure at all on my ribcage, including just well-fitting shirts) because that can cause rib subluxations. also, I regularly dislocate my shoulder while putting on bras.

and now I've got my head in my hands over here, because I swear, part of having chronic illnesses is just constantly recontextualizing your weird childhood behavior!!!

like I used to get in trouble a lot as a kid for sitting scrunched up at the dinner table (like crosslegged or knees pulled up to my chest) and when I went to Mayo to get diagnosed at 17 the doc was like "does she sit all curled up a lot?" and my mother was like "???? yes?????" and it turned out that was a behavior they'd noticed in a lot of kids with POTS because we had such weird blood flow problems.

(and yes, my mom then felt bad for yelling at me for it for all those years. lmao)

#but yeah that's also why I wear the baggiest clothes humanly possible while I'm at home #I can't wear anything constrictive at ALL because it's a subluxation risk #so I'm comfortable when nothing is touching me haha #it's also why I'm always stripping like the second I get back hahaha #I guess if we're also admitting gross things we did as kids I would run the shower and pretend I'd gotten into it sometimes #and just run water over my head at the end so people would think I'd showered and washed my hair #because I always got so sick in the shower #it was like the only duplicitous thing I ever did as a child lmao I was well-behaved to a FAULT #but I hated showers #STILL DO but now I know how to not pass out in them so much #.........sigh I always insisted on baggy clothes as a kid too #'they're just more comfortable!!' #EVERYTHING MAKES MORE SENSE NOW... #cw: #chronic illness #disability

[orcelito]

Still not used to how damn easy it is to make me cry anytime anything dad related is mentioned

It's like a specific trigger that is all over everywhere. Ah well. Such is life.

#speculation nation #not like every mention of a dad does this but if it makes me think about *my* dad. well nonzero chance ill start crying right there. #usually just a few tears. i wasnt even sniffling for this one. #just got punched in the heart and squeezed my eyes shut and what do you know. theres tears now. #stopping as quickly as they started. #and sometimes i see a loving dad in a show hugging his kid(s) and i get just a Deep ache in my chest... #this may or may not just be the entire rest of my life y'all. sigh. #negative/ #i guess. i know all the dead dad talk has got to be rather tiring by now. #but it's been almost 2 months and im still processing. alas. #i'll still be processing for months and months im sure. oh well.

[cherubifyy]

4 more days n itll be this blog's 1 mth anniversary..

#🔎 :inathink: #we r 7 hoomans away frm a cult following of 200 #im exhausted wif life n writing already #i like it but its taking so much from me #n living mainly ofc #sometimes i peer out the window n imagine its me on the concrete.. splat onto it n all #but then i close the windows with a relieved sigh #knowing that its not today #but if not today then when? never #i digress tho #guess ill write a one month anni fic #then continue wif the 100 special i promised

[snowflakeb0ttles]

my drawing tablet had better not be breaking right now or im killing someone i am so serious

#its not like. broken #but the cord has been fucking up for a few days and now it starts drawing when im not touching the screen sometimes #which while annoying. is not the worst thing ever. #so mayb i can finish these last few commissions and like. order a new one . i guess. #big dramatic sigh

[totalspiffage]

Starting to feel bad about my lack of any career advancement or satisfaction so I think time for bed before I start blaming myself for my many limitations

#sometimes I'm like okay but j could go way deep into debt moving to a place i hate for a few more cool roles but #sigh #disabled so that won't go well at all #so fuck me i guess #just gonna be forever looking at everyone else doing great!!! #anyway i do commercials good

[dreamerlynx]

.

#sigh. puts up the barricades please I do not want to see d.nf on my dash #and again I do have it super filtered #I’m just soooo tired every little thing being HARD LAUNCH HARD LAUNCH until the next thing bc of course that didn’t happen #and life went on as usual #look I get it I’m the minority I’m aroace and easily exhausted by shipping esp real ppl shipping #but it’s times like this I miss the lore fandom bc man the complete focus on platonic dynamics and relationships was so nice #look if they ever actually say they’re dating I guess I’ll eat my words but so far I am not getting the sense that that will ever happen #and so it is extremely annoying to want to follow drm fans and get 90% of One Single Ship #and no sap except as third wheel for said ship #sorry I’m the only one who seems to not care abt George 😭😭 not in a bad way just. he’s fine and funny sometimes I guess but #I Just Don’t Care. and also another thing I need to get off my chest #why do ppl act like George is really shady and passive aggressive and ‘oh he should interact w X person who wronged drm he’d ROAST THEM!’ #like huh #George is one of the most Don’t talk about anything be vague be private ppl ever #I’m not saying he hasn’t had his moments of public support for drm but I just don’t get it #(it’s probably because he’s so vague and noncommittal that fans can just project their own feelings onto him) #sigh anyway I’m done that makes me feel better a bit #no tags just venting #<- it’s funny that became my venting tag now that I only vent in tags #bc some things such as this I am afraid to even put under read more lol