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#*slowly removes my heart-shaped sunglasses*
grimmanxiety · 9 days
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Incorrect quotes~
Wiggly: What’s something you guys are better than Pokey at?
Tinky: Mario Kart.
Nibbly: Yeah, video games.
Blinky: Emotional vulnerability.
Tinky: There. How do I look?
Blinky: Like a cheap French harlot.
Tinky: French?!
*The Squad is eating dinner*
Blinky: Can you pass the salt?
Pokey: *throws Wiggly across the table*
Tinky, holding an antique bottle: Is this whiskey or perfume?
Nibbly: *grabs and chugs the entire bottle*
Nibbly:
Nibbly: It's perfume.
Nibbly: Hello Blinky, made anyone cry today?
Blinky: Sadly, no. But it’s only 4:30.
Wiggly: Happy Throwback Thursday! Here’s a throwback to when Nibbly ate an entire tube of lipstick.
Nibbly, whining: But why would it be cherry-flavored if you can’t eat it?!
Pokey: Here is my wall of inspirational people.
Wiggly: Is that a picture of you?
Pokey: Yes, I am big enough to admit that I am often inspired by myself.
Tinky: Honestly, I am so evil. So full of darkness. I feed of the souls of the living I strike fear into-
Blinky: You sleep with a teddybear.
Tinky: He’s my sECOND IN COMMAND IN MY ARMY OF DARKNESS!
Blinky: *slowly removes heart-shaped sunglasses* I beg your fucking pardon?
Pokey: When you've been on the internet for as long as I have, you develop a thick skin.
Wiggly: *walking past* Navy blue isn't your color.
Pokey: Navy blue brings out my eyes, you prick! *chases after Wiggly*
Pokey: Request for you not to be a bitch.
Wiggly: Request denied.
Uncle Wiley: I am not gaslighting you. I am lying to you. Gaslighting implies a level of effort that I am simply not putting in.
Uncle Wiley: Deceiving you does not require much
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Fantasy High Text Posts Part 5
Aelwyn and Fabian: "i can fix him" Bitch you're worse Riz: i'm going to give my inner child a gun Fabian and Riz: Bro your relationship with your friend is borderline homosexual and I think that's beautiful Aelwyn: and just when you think you've hit rock bottom, you want to fuck a blond guy Gorgug: that's my girl [said about a man] Fabian: the worst part about kissing a ten is the cold feeling your lips get from touching the mirror Fig: *slowly removes my heart shaped sunglasses* i beg your fucking pardon Kristen: *don't stop me by queen now plays as i lay bleeding to death in walmart* Adaine: got cringe trauma in my fail brain
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slifarianhawk · 4 months
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Chapter 40: Gifts
It had been just under a month since I had bonded with Uroboros. The undying Hadean-level heat finally died down about a week ago and Albert's touch stopped feeling like in inside walls of a walk-in freezer.
He had taken to the Angelis virus perfectly hardly any changes except his skin tone was just a tad paler and his hair was slightly brighter as well. He stood on the balcony of our apartment. With a book in his hand, he stood out looking at the horizon. 
I sighed, I looked over at the calendar noticing the date. It was the twenty-fifth, back before we had taken our separate routes we had spent this day in the past with William and his family. My after my mother passed Chris and Claire busied themselves with either volunteer work or staying on their military base around the holidays.
Albert walked in and saw my cloudy eyes. He places his book on the left-hand side table and walks to the closet.
"I have something for you dearheart." He said walking over to the wall away from the bathroom door. He removed his glove and pressed his wedding ring on the black pad attached to the wall. A secret panel was unlatched and opened up.
"These are some relics from our past I couldn't just let go of. I was planning on giving you this sooner but your body was so hot from binding with Uroboros that I decided it was a better idea to wait. There is also something I couldn't risk Sergei taking after you told me how much it meant to you." He said pulling out a small old fruit-patterned suitcase that we had bought for our honeymoon tour of the Mediterranean.
"Wow! Now that old thing brings back some memories!" I chuckle my eyes brightening a bit at the sight of that.
He set it on the bed and unzipped the old case. The zipper broke off from the track likely due to the lack of use from over the years. Rust is prevalent on the zipper. He pulls out a box wrapped in a plastic bag. He removed the broken suitcase from my sight more than likely in the kitchen. When he walked back in he smiled and removed his sunglasses setting them on top of his book.
"Go ahead open up the package, my lotus." He said sitting next to me on the bed.
With a smile and a sigh, I ripped open the vacuum-sealed bag. Upon pulling out the box I noticed it had a familiar scent to it. It reminded me of our bedroom back in Raccoon City.
I opened the top and nearly cried when I pulled it away. It was our old sky blue and gold cotton comforter. William and Anette had bought it for us for our wedding. It was in just as good shape as the last day Albert and I had slept under it. I stuck my hands into the soft slightly scratchy only to find an even more scratchy material.
"What's this?" I ask slowly pulling out a neatly folded light yellow knitted square. At the moment I saw it, my heart nearly stopped. Yet another item I had thought Sergei destroyed. It was the baby blanket my great-aunt on my mother's side had knitted for me as a baby. I kept it with me even when I went to the Umbrella management training facility. Anette found the fact I kept a hold of it weird but Wesk never did.
"I still remember the day you told me about it, dearheart." He said removing the box and bag from the bed while pulling me and the blankets up to his chest, "The day that one girl tripped you down the stairs and you ended up breaking Marcus's favorite vase. He gave you the worst verbal lashing anyone there had seen. We were just friends at the time but I knew I had to do something."
Tears dripped down my eyes, "Yeah, I heard you told Marcus what had happened.  While I was let go from being sent on dish duty I still remember that bitch being there until she snuck into the leech lab." I said with a sigh bringing up the small knitted blanket to my face.
"I meant when I came to your dorm that night. You were sobbing and holding that blanket up to your lovely face much like you are doing right now. Do you remember what I said to you when you told me it was your baby blanket?" He asked stroking my hair and placing it behind my ear.
I had to think for a moment but slowly the memory haze cleared away and that moment became recognizable again, "How could I not? We shared our first kiss just after you had told me. You said 'Tabitha, it is okay to hold on to the past. We need the past to make a stronger better future. I don't think having a cherished item holds you back but rather it helps move you forward.'"
I looked up at Albert to see a nostalgic smile gracing his lips, "And that is when you planted a small kiss on my lips. It stunned me that you would be so bold as you were very much sheltered by your family."
"Yeah well, I have you still even after all the time apart, we fit together like gears in a clock," I whispered kissing the shell of his ear.
"Given the date, I do have something else for you my precious lotus," Albert said but I pressed my right index finger to his lips.
"And I have something for you as well my treasure but this is not the place. If you would please follow me." I said as my comms choker vibrated.
"Pheonix here," I answered.
"What is taking you so long? I had everything set up like thirty minutes ago and you know I don't like waiting," Gale said in a grumpy voice.
"I was just heading down with him now," I answered clicking off my comm, "Grab what you got me, and let's go."
Albert just shook his head and walked over to the secret panel closet. He grabbed a black large attache case that had two fairly durable locks on it. I smile walking over to my closet. I put on a flowy blue and white dress that covers my feet along with white flats.  I pulled out a snowflake necklace that I had stashed in my pack when I first got captured by Albert.
"Who's necklace is that my lotus?" He asked looking at me in the mirror.
"It was Alistar's. I sent her family this pendant in ninety- two when I was on the run from Umbrella with our second child. She was wearing it the day she died." I said hugging Wesk as he held the white sapphire snowflake in his hand.
"She would have reminded you of a snow-white lily, she was so pure and innocent. Even stained in blood she was as innocent as a turtle dove." I whisper as I head towards our private elevator.
"Wasn't that the name you had chosen for her if you had kept her?" He asked as he grabbed his trench coat from the coat rack in our kitchen.
I smiled and gently brushed the falling strands of hair out of his face, "I'm surprised you remember that."
"Of course, I would dearheart. She was our first after all." He called the elevator and we got on soon after. Albert brushed his hand against my own. He wasn't wearing his gloves for once. His face while stoic radiated an air of serene peace.
"Something caught your eye dearheart?" He smirked turning towards me.
I smiled, "Just you, my god."
He laughed as he pulled me close and kissed my neck, "You are so precious to me, my lotus. I never wish to lose you."
"Merry Christmas Albert," I whispered.
"Merry Christmas Tabitha." He said into my neck.
The elevator door opened and Jill was waiting for us. She was wearing a red sweater with a green overcoat and white leggings. She greeted us with a smile on her face. She wasn't acting I noticed.
"Come on you two. We were waiting for you." She giggled and took the weapon case from Wesker. She started to walk towards the library as Albert had a confused look on his face.
"We? Who did you gather? Excella is not here and most of the staff are B.O.Ws." Albert asked.
"Just some people that matter to us, well more me but you need to expand your horizons my treasure. Some social interaction would be good for you." I said as we arrived at the massive library.
Jill scanned my keycard and the sliding steel door opened revealing a small festive gathering. Gale sitting on a leather sofa next to an ornately decorated Christmas tree. Arjuna standing at the gift table. Steve and Nighthawk are drinking cider next to the fireplace. Irving was drunk and talking to a column.
Jill dropped the black attache case off at the table and then sat down next to Gale, kissing him on the cheek. A light blush grew on his face as he sipped at his vodka cranberry. Jill just chuckled taking a glass of French champagne.
I smiled up at Albert who looked stunned at the small gathering. He shook his head slightly and then looked down at me with the smallest smile I'd seen from him. Clearly trying to hide some emotion.
"However did you plan this without my knowledge dearheart? I'm awake nearly twenty-four-seven save for the times I rest next to you for a few hours. Even then you are normally by my side so how?" He purred in my ear.
"Simple, I did it the same way I'm planning our vow renewal. Alistar programmed White Queen to manage Pheonix Corps. in my absence. That included charity balls and galas as well as small parties for the facility. To do it without you noticing all I had to do was keep an eye on you, my love, and turn up the charm a bit.
Albert chuckled, "You would be an amazing field operative if I were to ever need one but I will tell you this I had planned on at least bringing out Archer for the holidays."
I burst out laughing happily, "That explains why he said that this co aligns with his plans. But at minimum, I'm twice the agent than Ms. Wong is."
"Indeed you are." He said pulling me close.
Albert and I kissed. He walked over to the black leather armchair and grabbed a bottle of Johnnie's blue label. He poured himself a glass on the rocks and relaxed on the chair.
Arjuna walked up and hugged me. He was in his Phoenix Corps. management attire. I was happy he was able to come normally I had the lodge running over Christmas but this year I wanted to give my employees time with their families.
"It's good to see you, Tabitha" Arjuna said with a smile his hair back to being a solid black.
"And it is great to see you, my dear. How are things at home?" I asked floofing his silky hair.
"Things are running smoothly. Billy has taken up more of a managerial role and is the one in charge while I am away. I also brought a batch of viral stabilizing pills and activators just in case you ran out of stock." He smiled and walked toward the grand piano in the center of the room.
I watched as Albert stood up as well and joined him.
"Do you know how to play Arjuna?" Albert asked as he sat down on the bench, his glass of high-quality scotch in hand.
"Yes, it just has been a while, sir," Arjuna said with a slight bow.
"No need for such formality with me, your mother is my wife, and while we haven't bonded in the little time we have had. I do care for you." Wesker said motioning for him to sit next to him.
"Thank you, but still I will address you as sir till I feel comfortable around you," Arjuna said sitting next to him.
"Understandable, now do you know how to play any Christmas music?" Albert asked and Arjuna reluctantly shook his head no.
"I only know a partial of Carol of the Bells. The only song I really know is Moonlight Sonata I learned it for Tabitha."  Juna said earning a chuckle from Wesker.
"Her favorite classical piece. Then take the lead," Wesker said taking a sip of his scotch.
Arjuna started to play and then Albert followed suit. The music of the grand piano danced through the air. The sound sends shivers down my spine. Two of my favorite men playing one of my favorite classical pieces. I couldn't help but smile not letting the negative thoughts of Umbrella ruin this lovely moment.
Jill and Gale kind of cringed at the memories this song brought up. Yet the memories of the mansion incident seemed so far away to me.
"Even after everything that's happened, I can't help but feel nostalgic when I hear this song." I sigh walking up behind my two lovely men.
When they finished playing I pulled them into a warm embrace, "You both were amazing."
"Thanks, ma I enjoyed myself." Arjuna smiled standing up from the piano.
"Tabitha dearheart, I do believe people are ready to exchange gifts," Albert said taking a sip of his scotch. I knew this was difficult for him. He had so many unresolved traumas from the holidays. I was working through them the last few years before the mansion incident. Namely in S.T.A.R.S. but those are memories for another time.
"I'll help pass out the presents then," I said as Jill and Steve walked up to help me.
"Let me do the heavy lifting! Steve said quickly taking the heavy boxes.
"Whoa! OK! Seesh! CALM down, Steve." Me and Jill laughed as I grabbed Albert's presents from the table where they were stashed.
The sorting went swiftly and easily. Not to my surprise Jill and I had the most gifts. She had about two more than me, I would say.
"Alrighty, ladies first," Irving laughed and I rolled my eyes smiling as Jill opened a blue and silver box.
"I wonder who this is from... T." She jeered with a smirk.
I simply stuck out my tongue and Albert rolled his eyes sipping his drink. I doubted he'd get drunk but it was nice for there to be similarities to the past.
Jill smiled as she pulled out a lockpick set that had blue grips and a star on the end of the handle.
"These are nice T. Thank you." Jill smiled setting the case down.
"Now it's your turn boss lady," Gale said his hair slicked back, "the black and red box is from me open it."
"Alright, thanks, Gale." I smiled opening the box, and a gentle smile graced my lips, "These are nice, Gale. Are they corrective?"
"Same prescription and same color just stronger and less likely to fall off your face when in combat," Gale said kissing Jill on the cheek.
I pulled out the black pair of shades with purple lenses. There was an etching of a silver phoenix on the arms. I slide them on and the bright lights dim. The subtle headache that was growing quickly faded.
Quickly we went through the gifts. There was a wide variety of objects were given. From Wesker receiving a watch from Nighthawk and Arjuna. Arjuna finally told us that they were together and had just celebrated their six-month anniversary. I felt proud they had the confidence to tell us.
Irving got a couple of nice dress shirts and a decent-sized leather briefcase. Steve was hard to shop for but was still a kid so I got him a new deck of cards and a guitar similar to Chris's old acoustic one. Gale and Jill exchanged the most gifts with each other. They were mostly small bits and bobs but they had one gift each that they had put work into. Jill got Gale a necklace that matched hers.
"Something is written on it," Gale asked looking at the back of the pendant, "My sniper."
"Something to remind you of me when we are apart," Jill said smiling.
"We had the same idea then, " Gale said as Jill opened her black and red box.
Jill pulled out a leather bracelet that had a gold plate on the front with a lock pick etched into it, "I'm giving you the key to my heart Jill, like I should have when we were in S.T.A.R.S."  Gale smiled.
They hugged and gently kissed each other. When they did, I snuggled into Wesker's chest on the leather couch. I handed Albert a manilla envelope. He looked confused as he sat up and opened it. He pulled out pictures of a young man who was sixteen at this time. He had red-brown hair similar to Claire's and Albert's stormy blue eyes.
"I don't understand dearheart. Who is this young man?" Albert asked stroking my hair gently.
"One of my old contacts, the man who trained me. Hunk was his codename. I had him do some searching as a favor. The name of the lady who I left our son with was Reina Mueller. She was a dear friend of mine. That young man is her only child, the one she adopted in ninety-two. That young man is currently being trained as a Merc. He is being trained by the Grim Reaper himself. That young man's name is Jake Mueller." I said taking a glass of sparkling pear cider from a nearby table, "That's our son, Albert. I know we have that mission in Europe coming up. After we had completed it, I found some lodging. I booked it with Pheonix Corps. Resources and we are attending his mother's funeral. She died of a rare form of lymphoma. We are going to meet Jake."
"You have been quite busy dear lotus. I'm afraid my gift pales in comparison." Albert said unlocking the weapon case in front of me.
"I doubt that my love.  You know I'd cherish anything you'd give me. " I kiss Albert's cheek in a gentle manner
"I know dearheart. I just like making you say that." Albert smirked pulling out a fifty-cal-looking rifle decorated in black snake scale. The scope could switch between thermal, night vision, and regular sights, "I call this rifle scorpion. It can be charged by your electrical prowess. It is semi-automatic and fully modded for maximum damage. It's also lightweight and compact with minimum recoil. It's an anti-B.O.W. gun."
"I love it Wesk. I was always a lock-on kind of gal, not a spread-spray-and-pray kind." I joked around but it was a seriously nice sniper rifle, "Looks like I may be retiring my bow here soon."
"Alright I do believe that is all the presents let's start to pack it in and..." Arjuna started to say when Steve walked up and put a hand on his shoulder.
"Not quite arjuna I still have one gift left and it's for Wesker and Tabitha." He smiled.
"Well, what is it, Steve?" I asked curiously very much confused.
There were no more boxes or envelopes.  So what gift did he have for us? I glanced up at Albert. He wore his usual stoic expression but there was curiosity in his eyes.
Steve pulled out his laptop and went into the medical records portion of the U.M.F.014. White Queen appeared on his screen and smiled.
"Greetings Dr. Burnside, would you like to continue where we were last viewing?" She asked.
"Yes, I would White Queen and blow the image to full-screen," Steve said handing me and Albert the laptop as an image of an ultrasound was pulled up.
"I ran your blood work when you came in to see if you and Uroboros were properly bonded. while that came out with resounding positivity another thing came up. By the time I returned to my office, you were asleep pretty heavily on the medical bed. So I had to check the results and this is what I found." Steve said as tears started to well up in my eyes.
There were three small shapes hugging the walls of my womb. How far along was I? Albert held me close I felt his smile in my hair. We were pregnant and we were going to have triplets. This explained the bouts of nausea I had been having and the extreme exhaustion.
"From my knowledge based on the blood tests and the ultrasound, you are about six to seven weeks along. It seems you have succeeded in your side project." Steve smiled closing the laptop.
"Well, I'll be damned! Congratulations you two. Looks like I get to be a cool uncle after all." Gale laughed kissing Jill.
I started laughing as well pressing my cheek into Albert's chest. Parents, we would be parents.  Tears streamed down my face.
"Tabitha my dear lotus, this is the best Christmas I have had, and something tells me the next ones will just be even better," Albert said kissing me.
"Merry Christmas everyone!" I shouted out and smiled brightly.
This has been one hell of a year.
Hey everyone slifarianhawk here and Merry Christmas to all. Spend time with your loved ones and enjoy them. I'll be on a brief holiday till the new year so I can spend some much-needed time with my partners (I'm in a trouple ^^) and I love all of ya'll. My name is Silfarianhawk and I'm not so far away.
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blueaiyuice · 10 months
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*slowly removes my heart shaped sunglasses* i beg your fucking pardon
(some chen jianyu fanart!)
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amcrist · 1 year
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*slowly removes my heart-shaped sunglasses*
i beg your fucking pardon  
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incorrectechobgr · 1 year
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Networking 💬📱📧
Khushi: I hate citations, why can't you just trust me?
Aaryan: Tragic that someone this sexy has to go through this much.
Jyoshitha: Ideologically I don't agree with organised religion but they kind of went off with stained glass
Parth: I eat 15 apples for breakfast then drive myself to the hospital just to watch the doctors get blasted backward into the drywall because they can't withstand my aura
Aastha: Emotionally I am the chair laundry
Elijah: *slowly removes my heart shaped sunglasses* I beg your fucking pardon?
Harini: My self care routine? "Keep going bitch!" Said to myself in different accents.
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animatedtext · 3 years
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poisoned-peppermint · 2 years
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I'd throw this brick at you but that police car needs its window broken (Incorrect quotes)
More Incorrect quotes the bees demand it and I must fulfill their desires
Long post
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Velvet: Did it hurt?
Antfrost: *rolls eyes* let me guess, when I fell from heaven 
Velvet: no
Antfrost: What?
Velvet: *grins* when you fell for me
~~~~~~~
Skeppy: Hey, you wanna see something beautiful??
Bad: Sure!
Skeppy: *holds up a mirror facing Bad*
Bad: *blushes*
Bad: *whispering* I wish you would stop sometimes…
Skeppy, casually: only when you stop being so irresistibly adorable.
Bad: *blushes harder* 
~~~~~~~~
Skeppy: Who the fuck
Bad: Language
Skeppy: Whom the fuck
Bad: *sighs* no
~~~~~~~~
George: you know I’m jealous of you
Dream: Huh? Why?
George: your partner is way hotter than mine *walks away*
Dream: wait but
Dream: but wE ARE DATIN-
Dream: COME BACK HERE YOU LITTLE SHIT
~~~~~~~~~
Dream: *drunk*
George: Come on, let's get you home
Dream: I am
George: ??
George: whAt
Dream: I’m with you
George:
George: *dies inside*
~~~~~~~
Sapnap:Have you ever dated anyone?
Karl:No
Sapnap: *genuinely surprised* HOW!?
Karl: *shrugs* I don’t know, never asked, never got asked.
Sapnap: *under breath* but you’re so beautiful 
Karl: what?
Sapnap: what?!
~~~~~~~~
Tubbo: I was sitting there so like move.
Ranboo: *grins* Nah
Tubbo: Fine then *Sits on Ranboo
Ranboo: This is nice *hugs tubbo from behind*
~~~~~~~
Dream: Gonna see how hard I can bully the gay little protaganist kid until I get my redemption arc privilege revoked 
~~~~~~~
Skeppy: *sitting in Bads lap* Pay attention to me.
Bad: We were just making out two seconds ago
Skeppy: I don’t see your point.
~~~~~~~~
5up: I want to see us grow old together.
Fundy: Are you assuming I want to live?
5up: …Are you ok?
~~~~~~~~
Ranboo: Why must my feelings be “rational”? Is it not enough to sit quietly in my Hawaiian shirt, deranged?
~~~~~~~
Skeppy: I like my men fruity and pathetic. You wouldn’t get it.
~~~~~~~
Techno: I think killing people should be legal because it’s funny.
~~~~~~~
Tubbo: *mob boss voice* look how they massacred my poor little meow meow
~~~~~~~
Fundy: Vibe check! *eats your heart and absorbs your power*
~~~~~~~
Fundy, playing a rhythm game: no one will ever Fucking love me. Omg full combo!
~~~~~~~
Fundy, in a vampire voice: I vant to be emotionally stable
~~~~~~~
Bad: I’m well aware that I've accidentally set myself on fire and it’s none of your business. I don’t need your pity water either. Let me burn in peace.
~~~~~~~~
Bad while sipping apple juice out of a champagne glass and looking dramatically off into the distance: I’ve had it.
~~~~~~~
Bad: Blood is, of course, one of the greatest fashion statements.
~~~~~~
Tommy: Watch out bro…next thing you know i’m gonna be peeling an orange and sharing it slice by slice with you
~~~~~~~
Bad - mallgoth malewife manwhore
~~~~~~~
5up to Fundy: baby boy you are so cringe i want you
~~~~~~~
Tubbo: i go to home depot
Tubbo: i eat the tools
Ranboo: Stop it
Tubbo: crumch
~~~~~~~
Wilbur: No alcohol in this flask girl this is miso soup
~~~~~~
Bad: Do you ever get water hungry?
Puffy: Water Hungry??
Ant: Do you mean thirsty?
Bad: *blinks* oh
~~~~~~~
Tubbo: *Coming out of the shower*
Ranboo: Finally.. I can brush my teeth.
Tubbo: Brushing your teeth is the only time you clean your skeleton.
Ranboo:.......Thanks...I needed that weird out of the blue fact today.
~~~~~~~~
Skeppy: Babe ur eyes are like stars. There’s so damn many of them. Why so many eyes, my sweet eldritch beauty? Wh
~~~~~~~
Ranboo to tubbo: you alright babe?  you hardly said cows when we passed that field of cows
~~~~~~~~
Niki: *giggles cutely* i'm going to snap
~~~~~~~
Puffy: Diversity win! Im bisexual and im going to kill you!
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Eret: *slowly removes heart-shaped sunglasses* I beg your fucking pardon
~~~~~~~~
Dream: Stop calling me a bad person just because im orchestrating your down fall
~~~~~~~~
Dream: half of me is a hopeless romantic and the other half of me is, well, an asshole
~~~~~~~~
Skeppy to Bad: “I’m feral and goblin-like” that’s great now can you get all the bowls of cereal out of your room
~~~~~~~
Sapnap: In my deffence I’m dumb as hell, your honor
~~~~~~~~~
Ponk : Dudes be like “I know a place” and then you end up chained in their basement
~~~~~~~~
Niki: “I could fix him” good for you I guess. I could be the only thing he’s truly afraid of.
~~~~~~~~~
Bad: I will never elaborate because I have no idea what I just said.
~~~~~~~~~~
Bad: every day I put on my evil little clothes and do my evil little tasks
*after the usual feedback* 
Bad: every day I put on normal pants and do my normal flippin tasks. That is what you guys wanted me to flippin say! Everyday  I wEAR THE SAME T-SHIRT I WORE YESTERDAY AND TOAST MYSELF A FUDGEING BAGEL IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT!
~~~~~~~~~~
Wilbur: ok first of all I didn’t “miss” the red flags I looked at them and thought yeah that's sexy.
~~~~~~~~~
Quackity: ok yes I may be evil and morally corrupt but I’m also incredibly beautiful and I think that makes up for it honestly.
~~~~~~~~~
Bad: Attacking people and biting them and killing them has many health benefits. Not for them obviously but my skin has never looked better.
~~~~~~~~
Bad: I’m not angry with you, I was being playful. I stabbed you with my fun knife.
~~~~~~~~~~
let me know if you want more along with the increasingly odd titles   
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cemeterything · 5 years
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*slowly removes my heart-shaped sunglasses* i beg your fucking pardon
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Neighbors
Summary: After breaking up with your fiancé you find yourself moving back in with your brother and his daughter just outside of the city. Marcus Moreno is his neighbor and he really does take his neighborly duties to heart. Including taking care of mowing the lawn when your brother had to leave for work for a while. 
Pairing: Marcus Moreno x F!Reader
Wordcount: 2.5k
Warnings: yearning, sexual tension, k-i-s-s-i-n-g, way too many mentions sweat and a lawnmower
A/N: This one goes out to @mouthymandalorian​. I still have no idea how this happened but I am not complaining 😂
Masterlist
Taglist in reblog (you can add or remove yourself by clicking on the link or just ask me and I’ll add you)
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The first time you met Marcus Moreno was on the day you moved into your brother's place.
It was autumn when you found yourself in front of your brother’s house. Your fiance and you had decided to end things, which left you temporarily moving into your brother’s place. At least back then you thought it would be temporary. He had bought a house outside the city a couple of years ago and was living with his daughter. He had been divorced a couple of years ago and immediately said yes when you asked him for help.
It was a beautiful and quiet neighborhood.
“And you won’t be safer anywhere but here. The leader of the heroics lives just across the street.” And as if he could hear your brother say those words he was walking over to the moving truck, offering his help. Marcus Moreno. Of course you knew who he was. The whole country probably knew. He had introduced himself, taking one of the boxes you were carrying from you, and followed your brother inside the house. He stayed for dinner that evening, your niece Tara and his daughter Missy having to work on a school project. You learned a couple of things about him that evening. Marcus and your brother were buddies and the only single men in the whole neighborhood.
“Dad is completely oblivious to all the women ogling him every time.” Missy rolled her eyes, making you chuckle and Marcus frowned.
“Nobody’s ogling me, Missy.” She just shook her head and you smiled at her as she left the room to pack her things.
“They are totally checking you out, Marcus.” Your brother teased. “Just like my sister here.” Marcus turned his head to look at you and you turned away to slap your brothers arm.
“Very funny, asshole,” you shook your head with a laugh, almost fleeing out of the kitchen.
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The first weeks flew by and sooner than you thought Thanksgiving approached. You were planning on having the best Thanksgiving dinner ever, going a little bit over the top with the groceries.
“You need some help with that?” A voice behind you startled you, making you almost drop the bag full of food. Before it hit the ground someone caught it and you felt yourself blush as you looked into the warm eyes of Marcus Moreno.
“Sorry,” he smiled a little. “Didn’t want to startle you.”
You noticed him more often from that day on. Missy, his daughter, and your niece Tara were close friends.
Marcus was always nice. Always. He offered help where he could. You noticed yourself staring at him more and more and he always smiled back when he noticed you. Nothing could however prepare you for when spring came around.
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You were up early going for a run. Your way of dealing with break-ups was eating your feelings and you really needed to get back in shape. With your headphones on you only noticed the unmistakable noise of the lawnmower when you were close to home. Changing to the other side of the street you caught a glimpse of Marcus outside of his house, mowing the lawn. It was still pretty early and a little chilly, yet there he was, dressed in some old jeans and a dark grey shirt, headphones in his ears, oblivious to the outside world. You slowed down, pulling out your headphones as you tried to get a better glimpse, knowing for sure that the way his arms flexed would be a picture you would be thinking about for a while. You were so focused on Marcus you almost ran into a tree, cursing to yourself. When you turned you caught his eyes and he winked, waving at you in greeting. You smiled awkwardly, waving back before you crossed the street to get back into your house, cursing to yourself until you were in the bathroom where you definitely weren’t thinking of how strong his arms would feel around your body.
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The more time passed, the more you were sure Marcus Moreno was everything but oblivious to the way people looked at him. Or at least to the way you looked at him. He never made a move, but he made sure to greet you whenever he saw you, offering his help when you had something to carry. And you caught him staring at you across the dinner table more than once when he was over for dinner which seemed to happen more often now that you were cooking. He told you that he was a terrible cook and that your brother wasn’t much better and that this had been the first time since his wife died, that he and Missy were having home-cooked meals regularly.
You remembered the warm feeling that spread in your chest as he opened up to you. That had been the first time you hugged him. And he didn’t let go until you both heard someone breaking something in the living room.
In summer your brother had to leave for this job for a couple of weeks, leaving you and Tara alone. You didn’t mind. You loved her like your own child. And she was growing up so fast.
“Mr. Moreno is coming over tomorrow to take care of the garden,” Tara informed you at dinner on a Friday night.
“Oh?” You asked.
“He said you shouldn’t have to do it on your own just because Dad is gone.” She shrugged, focusing back on the TV.
“That’s nice of him.” You nodded, eating your dinner.
The aspect of Marcus Moreno spending the whole Saturday in the same place as you made it hard for you to sleep. Which was stupid cause the man was living across the street and you saw him almost every day. You were terrified of saying something dumb in front of him, mostly because you were crushing on him, hard. But he had to know that at this point.
More than once you heard Missy complain about the moms at her school when Marcus picked her up.
“The way they look at him? Ugh gross. I’m happy your Aunt is not a lovesick puppy like those moms at school.” She said one day and you chuckled.
“Because I’m a cool aunt.”
“For the most part.” Tara teased and you looked shocked at her before all three of you burst into giggles.
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It was supposed to be a hot summer day. You dropped Missy and Tara off at the local outdoor pool before you made your way back home. You stopped on the way to get some groceries, intending to make some fresh lemonade today. You completely forgot about the time, cursing to yourself when you saw Marcus walking over the street as soon as you parked the car.
“Shit. Sorry. I completely forgot the time,” you said as you jumped out of the car.
“No worries. It’s not like I have a long way over here,” Marcus winked. You smiled a little, turning away from him to control your face as you made your way towards the front door.
“You sure you wanna do the lawn today? It’s supposed to be the hottest day of the week.” You asked, putting the bag full of fruits down on the kitchen counter.
“I’m sure. Nothing I can’t handle,” he smiled. You looked at each other, uncertain how to continue and you could swear you saw his eyes wander to your lips before he nodded.
“Okay. I’m gonna start before the sun is gonna melt me.” He took his glasses off to change them to the sunglasses he had brought before he turned around and walked out and into the garage. You definitely weren’t checking out his ass in his jeans until he was out the door.
Ignoring him outside at first you got into making the lemonade and some ice tea. You smiled as you saw the picture Tara and Missy send you, asking if it would be okay if they went for a sleepover at one of their friends' places. The perfect opportunity to go outside and ask Marcus. Maybe it was time to turn up the flirting.
Changing out of your Jeans shorts and Shirt you put on a light summer dress. It wasn’t short, going just over your knees but the neckline and backline were probably a little more revealing than you should be wearing outside of your home. But the front yard still technically was your home. After you changed you stopped at your window and felt yourself growing even hotter. Marcus was just below your window, his white shirt drenched with sweat, clinging to his chest, his hair wet and curling in his neck. You saw his strong tanned arms glistening with sweat as he pushed the mower and you felt your knees getting weak.
“Fuck me…” You whispered to yourself before you made your way downstairs. With a mission.
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He didn’t notice you coming out of the house. Carrying two big glasses, one with lemonade, one with ice tea you made your way over to him, smiling to yourself as you caught him humming along to the song he was listening to. You tried to notice the song and were pretty sure it was “Take on me” by A-ha. He looked up when you were close, giving you a small smile as he turned off the mower and pulled out his headphones.
“Hey.” He said.
“Hey. I thought you might need something to drink?” you raised your eyebrows in question. He nodded, pulling the hem of his shirt up to wipe off the sweat from his forehead, giving you a glimpse of his stomach. You swallowed but didn’t look away.
“Lemonade or Ice Tea?” you asked instead, looking into his face as he straightened down his shirt.
“Ice Tea,” he answered and you handed him the glass. His fingers brushed over yours and your smile got a little wider.
“You do know that mowing the lawn in the heat of the sun will kill the lawn at some point?” You asked. He gulped down his Ice Tea, watching you intently. You didn’t hide the way you were ogling him, feeling the sweat slowly drip down between your breasts the longer you stood here in the sun. It really was a hot day.
“I’m almost finished and this isn’t my yard” He handed you the glass back with a smirk and you shook your head. “Thank you.” He smiled, you nodded and turned around to leave.
“Oh before I forget,” you turned around again, catching him staring at your back, his eyes finding yours only slowly. “Tara texted to ask if it would be okay if Missy and her slept at Nicole’s place? Her mom said it was okay, but I’m gonna check in with her.”
“Sounds okay for me. I’m gonna check in with her Mom too when I’m finished here.” He said hoarsely and you nodded.
“You wanna maybe stay for dinner? As a thank you for your hard work,” you added. He smirked. “I won’t say not to that.” He winked before he slowly pulled his shirt off. You were sure your eyes popped out of your head before you turned around and walked into the house, hearing him chuckle behind you.
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You were on the phone with Nicole’s mom, leaning on the kitchen island, your head propped up on your hand when you heard the door close behind you. You looked over your shoulder, seeing Marcus enter and smile at you before you turned away again.
“I’m okay with it. Marcus just got in. If he’s okay, it would be great if you pick up their overnight bags when you pick them up from the outdoor pool.” You said.
“Great. Nicole has been dying to camp in the garden for one night, but she’s scared alone. Having Tara and Missy with her would be great.” You listened to her, but almost jumped when you felt Marcus’ hand on your lower back. His hand was warm and you closed your eyes as he leaned closer. You turned on the spot, the phone still in your hand, and looked up at him. He wasn’t wearing his glasses and was still shirtless. You were faintly aware of Nicole’s mom talking on the phone, but didn’t hear a word she was saying.
Marcus leaned with one hand on the kitchen island, his other hand coming up to take the phone out of your hand. His eyes didn’t leave yours as he talked to Nicole’s mom and you felt yourself shiver. He wasn’t touching you, yet it felt like your body was on fire with the way he was looking at you. He ended the call, putting the phone down.
“Nicole’s mom will be picking up the girls in two hours. We gotta pack some stuff for the girls until then.” He whispered, one of his hands coming up to cup your cheek.
“Why do I think that you are everything but oblivious to the way women look at you?” You asked him. He smiled a little. He was dirty and sweaty and you couldn’t care less with the way he was looking at you.
“I don’t care how women look at me. I do notice how you look at me though.” His thumb brushed over your cheek, slowly running down to your lip.
“And how do I look at you?” You asked.
“Like you wouldn’t say no if I kiss you right now.”
“Even as sweaty and gross as you are right now?” You teased. He chuckled.
“I can go and take a shower first…” You didn’t give him time to finish as you got on your tiptoes to kiss him softly. Surprised he dropped his hand from your face, parting from you for a second before he pulled you close to properly kiss you. It felt better than you would have ever imagined it and you sighed against his lips, your hands wanting nothing more than to run through his soft hair when you giggled, find it damp with sweat.
“Okay, this is kinda gross.” You still giggled and Marcus laughed. “But also kinda sexy,” you teased, looking at him. He smiled a little shy at you.
“I’m gonna take a shower and pack some stuff for Missy and then…”
“‘Then I’m coming over to cook dinner at your place,” you finished his sentence.
“My place?” he asked.
“I really don’t want to have sex in my brother’s house,” you grinned and he laughed.
“You sure?”
You nodded.
“Good. Cause I really don’t want to have sex at your brother’s house either,” he leaned down kissing you again.
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glitteryhellhole · 3 years
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alright lets do this
here we go
Title: The Tent Fandom: Z nation Pairing: 10K x female reader Word count: approx 3k Rating: 18 Description: fluffy smut with awkward cinnamon roll 10K
A gas station. A real life, untouched gas station. Apart from the bloody handprints smeared on the concrete walls.
It didn't take long to sweep and secure the area, then fill up the truck and the reserve cannisters. Afterwards Warren gestured with her gun to the convenience store. “Look for anything useful.”
The place had been untouched since day one. Mummified hot dogs still sitting on a rack. The register hanging open- perhaps in the beginning some people had looted cash, but it didn't take long to realise money didn't mean anything anymore.
You shoved bottles of water and packets of candy into your rucksack before following Addy's gaze to the toiletries shelf. Pads and tampons, little travel-sized bodywashes, an actual toothbrush.
“It's a whole new kind of mercy,” she whistled.
You picked up the first aid kit and the two crushed boxes of painkillers, turning to ask Doc if they'd be any good- and found him and Murphy kneeling on the counter, pulling away the plastic panel which guarded the cigarettes.
Priorities, huh.
Loaded up, you looked around you. Warren was on watch so 10K had let his guard down for once and was poking at the faded magazines. You saw his pink lips move as he mouthed the titles to himself. Something familiar caught his eye, probably the one with guns all over, and he reached up- and the whole top shelf came tumbling down. Suddenly 10K was surrounded by glossy double-page spreads of unnaturally bronzed and perky breasts and butts.
He froze like an animal in a trap.
“Found what you're looking for?” Doc's voice was loud and his arms were cradling an impressive quantity of alcohol. “There's a lot of generic lesbians, over forties, asian fetish, but for a beginner I'd recommend-”
The rest of his sentence was drowned out by a crash as 10K backed rapidly out of the shop, cheeks ablaze, taking down a stand of air fresheners and sending sunglasses skittering across the floor in every direction.
The rest of you laughed, for the first time in a while. Back in the truck and passing round bags of only-slightly-stale chips, you all agreed that the gas station was your best find in quite some time.
Except perhaps for the tent.
A little way back, a stranded family had been incredibly grateful for a tow out of the ditch, and had gifted you their spare tent. No ordinary camping gear, this thing was foil-lined and had a built in waterproof, cushioned underlayer. On an especially hot night you'd probably want it to yourself but the rest of the time it comfortably housed two people, keeping in the heat. You'd been taking turns each night, with priority to the injured, meaning that every morning there was at least one person who was fully rested and recharged. Ideal when every day was a battle for survival.
Of course, there was one other advantage to the tent. Privacy. Human needs didn't really get talked about in this un-human world, and whatever got overheard in the night would also go unspoken.
It was nearing dusk and you were pulling over to make camp. “Who's turn in the tent?” Murphy called out as he threw himself down on the ground. “Dibs.”
Warren, who was unloading a heavy bag, gave him a kick in the side. “Get up and help. I don't think 10K's had a turn yet.”
“Neither's she.” He nodded at you.
“Settled then.”
Murphy sniggered.
Since there was plenty of water, there was a rare chance to wash up a bit. Ladies first while the men stood watch with their backs turned, and then vice versa. Nowhere near to having a hot shower in privacy, but it was something. You noticed that 10K didn't bother putting his shirt back on afterwards as he squatted by the fire cleaning his weapons, a cigarette dangling from his mouth.
How could somebody so skinny be so strong? Must be the result of life outdoors.
He raised an eyebrow and you realised you were staring. Oops.
“Here.” Somebody passed you a can of cheap beer that had come from the store along with the snacks and cigarettes. It was almost like being at a camp-out. The beer was gross but it gave you a nice warm feeling in your chest, and the idea of lying down somewhere soft started to seem quite appealing, so you said your goodnights and retreated into the tent.
You weren't sure how long it was until you were joined, perhaps you'd started to drift off- the sound of the zip jolted you back to your senses as 10K flopped unceremoniously into the tent, stretching out next to you. “Beer makes shoelaces hard.” He complained.
You giggled and sat up to help. “When was the last time you slept without shoes on?”
“Probably before my voice broke.” He scratched his head while watching you remove his boots and then said, “I'm not good at talking, especially to girls, but you don't scare me.”
“Thanks for the compliment, I think?” You laid back down, closing your eyes and pulling your blanket over you. There was silence for a minute but it was oddly comfortable, the security of a warm person breathing next to you.
“What was your first word?” You asked into the silence. “I bet it was gun.”
“Actually it was primrose.”
“Huh?”
“My momma's favourite flower.” He rolled over onto his stomach, closing the gap between you, and rested his cheek on his folded arms. “I was six. Doctor said I wasn't learning but I was paying attention to everything. She used to take me to the library in town to look at all sorts of books, that where we learned to sign.”
You couldn't help but ask. “When did she...?”
“When I was nine. Pops wanted me to try and be a normal kid but once she'd gone he didn't want anything to do with the rest of the world and stopped sending me to school.”
“I'm sorry.”
“It's ok.” He wriggled a little to get more comfortable. “Can you talk for a bit now?”
So you talked about your own parents, and your hometown, and it surely wasn't very interesting but 10K watched you intently as he sobered up, studying your face, and you hoped you weren't blushing. After a while you came to a natural conclusion in your story and realised that his fingers were twitching, as though he were nervous.
What's up?” you asked softly.
He blinked slowly. “Ain't always easy to tell when you're supposed to say stuff and when you're not.”
Unsure what to expect, you gave him an encouraging nod.
“Can I... touch your hair?”
Your heart started to beat a little fast and you nodded again. 10K's fingers reached out timidly to feel you hair, twisting strands and brushing them away from your face.
You hadn't felt human touch in so long, and you couldn't help but rest your head on his arm as he stroked. The pair of you seemed to breathe in unison. It was almost peaceful.
Almost. Apart from the little sparks of electricity that seemed to fizzle into life where your skin touched his.
Could he feel it too? It didn't seem so. There he was growing more and more serene, while you were   warming up in a way that had nothing to do with the insulated tent.
“Um...” You fidgeted awkwardly, trying to choose the right words. “10K? You know why they were giggling right?”
“Uh-huh.” His eyes were closed. “People do stuff in the tent. Its pretty obviously I've never... y'know.”
“Does it bother you?”
“A bit, but its not like I can go meet a girl and ask her Pops if I can take her to the barn dance.”
You couldn't help but laugh a little. “I mean the teasing.”
“Oh.” He blushed slightly as he opened his eyes to look at you. “I get why, you're near my age and you're pretty. Any guy would be lucky to date you.”
Oh indeed. Maybe he did feel it then.
“You could...” You bit your lip and steeled yourself. “You could pretend that you were.”
He sat bolt upright, making you jump, and a wide grin spread across his face. “I could ask you on a picnic, at my favourite place in the woods.” His words were tumbling out fast from nervous excitement. “Make nice bread, Mom's special recipe with the dried fruit. And we could talk like we did earlier and I could pick you flowers and then I could kiss you.”
His lips were clumsy as they first met yours, but eager, and didn't take long to find a groove. You sighed and leaned in, one hand reaching up into his hair, and-
A single gunshot cracked through the air.
In an instant 10K was lurching for the tent entrance where his gun was propped. You reached for your shoes, panic rising in your chest.
“False alarm.” Doc's voice came from outside. “Nothing to worry about. Hey, you okay in there kid? Need me to give ya a quick pep talk on anything?”
“I'm good.” He zipped the flap back up then turned back to you. “Actually do you think maybe I should? I don't really know what to do.”
You couldn't help but laugh again. He was way too innocent for someone so good-looking.
You put and hand on his chest, feeling his heartbeat.  “Just do what feels natural.”
“Okay.” He gave you another wide grin, showing those adorably crooked teeth, and then practically launched himself at you, so you landed on your back and he was on top of you, lips moulding to the shape of yours. You gasped for air and 10K made an apologetic sound without pausing the kiss, propping himself up on one elbow so that you could breathe.
His hand rested on your stomach, fingers still for a moment before balling up your shirt and gently navigating the exposed skin. Tentative. Like soothing a spooked animal.
You reached your hand up to touch his shoulders, feeling hard muscle under surprisingly soft skin. Tracing his collarbones and around the back of his neck. He shivered and broke the kiss, and you saw his tongue dart out to wet his lips.
“Maybe I could take your shirt off too.” He mumbled. In answer you sat up and held your arms above your head. 10K pulled your shirt over your head- sending the little lamp tied to the tent roof swinging- then looked confused as his thumb hooked into the shoulder strap of your sports bra. You kind of wished you'd been wearing something nicer for this occasion, but you'd dressed for practicality before hitting the road.
“Here. Let me.” You wriggled out of the bra, trying not to elbow him in the process.
“Wowee.” 10K let out a whistle. “You look even better without clothes on. Why would anyone want to look at random pictures?”
It seemed like he could have sat there and stared forever, but you didn't have forever, and so you pulled him in to kiss again. He trailed his lips across your face and on to your neck, one arm supporting you from behind and the other hand landing on your chest, squeezing experimentally.
“Not so hard,” you gasped.
“Sorry. They're squishier than I expected.” He let out a humming noise into the crook of your neck as his fingers found a hard nipple and brushed back and forth.
You dipped your head down too, lightly touching your teeth to his throat. A low growl escaped and he pushed you back down, pressing his body close to yours, and you could feel his eager hardness against your hip.
10K tried the same move, nipping at the skin under your ear. His breathing was very shallow and rapid as he licked and sucked experimentally, moving down over your breasts.
“You taste good. But not in a zombie way.”
Your hands rested on his hips, fingers splaying out to softly squeeze his ass and then dipping below the loose waistband.
“Oh, wait.” He rolled off you to shed a pile of concealed knives and the little sharp discs that he used in the sling shot.
“What else are you hiding down there?” You smirked. For a moment he turned beetroot red and covered his crotch with his hands, but then met your smile with one of his own.
“Just means I like you and I like this.” He shrugged. “Do you-”
“Mmhmm.” You reached out to ease his trouser buttons undone, fumbling slightly, but you weren't nervous. It just felt right with him. “I like you. And I like this.”
He groaned softly as the restriction on his hardness eased and grabbed you for another kiss, this time hungry and slightly sloppy. 10K's fingers found the fastening of your own jeans and made quick work, tugging them down to your knees. Then he paused for a moment, putting a finger to your lips.
There was no noise from outside.
“We're good.” With a bit of awkward shuffling, you both shed your trousers and then looked at each other.
“We probably shouldn't go all the way,” you said almost reluctantly. “No protection and all that. But there's still stuff-”
“Anything.” 10K blurted out without a second's pause. “Everything. I'll do whatever you want. But not what you don't want.” His tongue darted out to wet his lips again as he stared at you earnestly.
You felt a shiver travel down your spine. Nobody had ever looked at you quite like that before. Not just lust but something deeper, as though he was seeing through your skin and right inside you.
“Come here,” he whispered huskily, grabbing your waist and pulling you onto his lap. You sighed into the kiss and slowly moved your hips, letting your centre rub against his as you straddled him, tangling fingers in his messy hair.
10K moaned something that sounded like “shucks” and you couldn't help but snort. What would it take to make him swear? You dug your nails in a little, catching his lip between your teeth.
“Want to touch you.” He moaned, gripping your hips. “Want you to touch me.”
You trailed your hand from his cheek all the way down to cup the pronounced bulge in his boxers and his eyes rolled back in his skull, but then he visibly shook himself and swatted your hand away. “Ladies first.” The hand slid a little clumsily down into your knickers.
You closed your eyes and rested your forehead against 10K's, feeling how hot his skin was. His curious fingertips traced your labia and in between.
“It's wet.” He sounded surpised, and brought a thumb to his mouth to taste.
“That's a good thing.” You felt a little self-conscious as you explained, watching him suck his thumb. “It means I'm, you know, turned on.”
“Show me how to make it feel good,” he murmured, lifting you off his lap and laying you back down before tugging your knickers all the way down and spreading your legs.
You took his hand in yours and guided him, showing him your clit. His marksman fingertips quickly picked it up and he kissed you again as he touched you. “Am I doing it right?”
“Yeah you're- oh, yeah thats good.” Your voice was high-pitched and breathy. 10K made a satisfied “hmph” and nuzzled into your neck. He smelled of safety. Less dirt and blood than usual, traces of soap, whatever he was using for hair gel, engine oil. Sweat but not in the just-been-running-and-fighting way, in the musky hormonal way.
The feeling swelling inside you was something you hadn't experienced, hadn't even thought about, in a long time. But here and now it was growing, consuming, and you couldn't imagine anything other than his touch, his hot breath on your cheek.
“Hey.” 10K's voice was husky again. “You need something else?”
You became aware that your hips were twitching. “A bit faster maybe?”
A moan escaped your lips as he obliged, and 10K grinned. “That's hot.” Then he cocked his head to one side, raising his eyebrows. “I assume girls can- y'know-”
“It looks a bit different but yes.” You were gasping now as you spoke, chest rising and falling.
“Do it for me.” He murmured, watching you as though hypnotised and biting his lip. His words and his gaze loosened the coiled spring that was weighing down your abdomen and the endorphins came rushing as you climaxed.
“Shh.” He pressed his mouth to yours and swallowed your moan, pressing his fingers harder as you moved beneath him until it became almost too much. “Do you want them to hear us?”
You shook your head, trying to control your breathing.
“Maybe you do.” He raised an eyebrow again as his fingers finally slowed to a halt. “I kinda do. So they all know what I just did to you.”
“Do you want your turn or not?”
That shut him up. He glanced down and you followed his gaze. He was still very much erect, and there was now a distinct wet patch where he'd leaked a little in excitement.
You pushed 10K onto his back and settled yourself next to him. “Let me know if something's not ok,” you told him. “I won't do anything you don't want.”
He nodded and closed his eyes. He flinched a little as you pulled his boxers down but then his face relaxed and his lips parted as you touched him.
“Have you done this to yourself?” You asked. “So you know what you like.”
He nodded, looking somewhat bashful. “A few times. But this is different. Better.”
It was your turn to grin as your fingers circled his erection and found a rhythm. 10K's head tilted back and the smallest of high-pitched noises escaped his open mouth. You lowered your lips to his exposed neck and sucked gently at the skin. There was a red mark when you pulled away.
“Mmmph.” He rasped through gritted teeth. “Again.”
“It'll leave a bruise.”
“Don't care.”
You began to create a trail of little hickeys down his throat and across his collarbones as you continued to stroke, and his tiny whimpers grew more frequent. You knew it wouldn't be long.
10K was holding onto you tightly, nails digging in, droplets of sweat visible on his forehead. “I think I'm gonna- ahh....” He seemed to lose the ability to speak as you attacked his neck again, eyes rolling back. A few moments later, his hips bucked and you could feel hot sticky warmth coat your fingers.
“Fuuuuuuuuuuck.”
So he did swear after all.
You kissed him again, and then looked down. “Um, got anything to clean up with?”
Still breathing heavily, 10K sat up and reached for his trousers, pulling a bandana out of one of the many pockets. “It's my least favourite. I'll burn it.”
Like the gentleman he'd been raised to be, he wiped your hand off first before tending to himself, then tossed the soiled cloth out of the way and pulled you close. You rested your head on his chest. You'd heard the term 'afterglow' but never really thought that it was a thing; it apparently was. The chemicals your brain was releasing and the protective hold of his arms made you want to laugh, and cry, and drift off to sleep, and run a mile, all at once.
Just for a moment, there was no apocalypse. There was only you and him and the little lamp above your heads.
It was 10K who broke the spell. “I need to pee.” he said apologetically. “Like, real bad.”
You laughed at the face he was pulling and threw his trousers at him. 10K slithered with some difficulty into them, kicking the side of the tent, and then stumbled outside.
You realised how cold it was now and reached for your own clothes. As footsteps indicated 10K's return, you could have sworn you heard the sound of a high-five.
“What was that?” You demanded as he re-entered the tent.
“Never mind.” He grabbed the blanket and laid it over you.”I  want to do that again. But we should probably get some sleep.”
“The whole point of the tent is to get proper rest right?” You scooted closer as he laid down, offering the blanket, but he refused, tucking it round you and then wrapping his arms round too so you were tightly cocooned against his side.
“Yeah. Sure.”
>>>>>Thanks for reading! This is the first fanfic i’ve done in literally years. Open to feedback and even perhaps requests :) PS i am v english so I apologise to any Americans insulted by my attempts at your words
367 notes · View notes
najatheangel · 3 years
Text
𝐌𝐲 𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐌𝐨𝐨𝐧
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pairing: jeon jungkook x reader
genre: extra fluff
requested: by angel anon
summary: Jungkook and his girlfriend can't sleep so they cuddle reminiscing about their relationship under the moonlight.
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As you toss and turn in the sheets, you’ve decided to tease Jung kook a little by blowing in his ear and whispering “Jung kookie, wake up I can’t sleep.” At first he moans turning your direction.
“That didn’t seem to work...” You try whispering one last time to wake him right up, but before you get the chance, swiftly wraps his arms around you pulling you closer to him leaving you surprised.
He slowly opens his eyes pretending he’s a zombie that’s risen from the dead and whispers “Grr, Gotcha!” He kisses you on the nape of your neck making you squirm and decide to cuddle filling the room with laughter.
“Jungkook, how long has it been since we’ve officially dated?” You lean your head on his shoulder looking up at his face.
“Hmm, well ever since last summer I believe. That was a special time for me, because that’s when I’ve first met you and decided to call you mine.”
You giggle at his cheesy comment remembering the first time meeting Jung kook around that time. He remembers traveling to Italy with the boys to shot the 5th episode of Bon Voyage where they’re strolling around the city taking group photos for their fans to see.
Jung kook was in the middle of filming for his big G.C.F. Projects and just so happen to film you during the process. He remembers you wearing a long beautiful sunflower dress with bergen sandals and a pair of yellow sunglasses smiling while drinking a glass of white wine. 
While looking back at his work he had filmed, he noticed you made an appearance and fell instantly for how beautiful you turned out in the video. He was asking people all around the city like a crazy man looking for you so he won’t miss his chance to talk to you.
This last for hours until he saw you again at the Roman Empire Colosseum standing under the moonlight glowing like you always do. Ever since that day you have been keeping touch with him ever since.
“You were so beautiful in your cute little sunflower dress. You know I couldn’t leave without meeting you one last time.” He looks down at you smiling while playing with your hair.
Another memory clicks in your head as he said that. “I also remember couple of dates at the beach where we got to play beach volleyball. You totally beat me big time as usual.”
When you and Jungkook started dating you’ve tend to travel city to city with him most of the time visiting all kinds of restaurants, visiting all kinds of places to take photos or some dates are on the low budget where you two just stay at each other’s homes, play video games and spend the night.
“Y/N, I’ve got a question. What’s your favorite date I’ve ever took you on?” When he asked you that question you, you’ve took the time to really think about it. Your favorite date with him the time Jung kook first said I love you.
You remember that day clear as light it was on your birthday and Jung kook rented out a stadium and rehearsed all week for the song he made for you and performed it live in front of your friends, family and you. It was a one man show he played the guitar, did his own choreography, and even came up with the concept for the stage design.
As you were watching the performance at that time from start to finish, you felt like the luckiest girl in the world to keep such a hardworking, multitalented and heart warming person as a boyfriend in your life. He walked towards you with your birthday cake and candles as everyone sings along with him.
“I love you y/n, do you love me too?” He looks at you smiling with his sparkling almond shaped eyes. “Yes, I love you too Kookie. Very much!”
He taps you snapping you out of dream land still waiting for your answer. “Oh sorry baby. I was remembering the time you confessed to me on my birthday.” You giggled as he leaned his head in your shoulder turning red from the memory.
“My heart was pounding so much that day. That has to be my favorite date and memory with you. What about you Kookie?”
He makes that silly face where he pretends he’s thinking.
“Hmm honestly everything, but today was pretty special. It’s the first time in forever since I’ve seen you and now we’re laying here under the moonlight together. That sounds like paradise to me.”
Hearing his words just makes you want to kiss him like crazy like there’s no tomorrow. You give him the most gentle yet passionate kiss on the lips and then smile one last time before dozing off to sleep.
“Jung kook I’m so glad to have met you. Seriously I love you.”
He looks at you one last time before leaning his head on top of yours sleeping right beside you in his silky black bed sheets.
“I love you much more y/n...”
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Thanks so much angel anon for requesting this lovely idea and I hope you enjoyed it.💖💖
𝐓𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 🏷 : @thechoppersan @starrdustville @dundun-baby @xxminmixx @purplepsycho03
Send an ask if you want to be added or removed from the taglist.💫💫💫
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incorrect-hs-quotes · 3 years
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Roxy: *slowly removes my heart-shaped sunglasses* i beg ur fucking pardon?
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kpophours · 3 years
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Stray Kids as some of my favorite tumblr text posts
Bang Chan: *fixes my sleep schedule* *ruins it the very next day* bro
Lee Know: my condolences to anyone who‘s ever lost me
Changbin: is ‘no’ an emotion because I feel it 
Hyunjin: how can I be ready for the future when I’m not even ready to get up in the morning
Han: I know it’s unhealthy to live in your own dream world but like... it’s safe bitch
Felix: *slowly removes heart-shaped sunglasses* I beg your fucking pardon
Seungmin: are you http because :// 
I.N.: from now on, by law, no one is allowed to ask me what I plan to do with my life or about my future plans. I‘ve updated my privacy policy.
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dreamiehrs · 3 years
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2:37 pm \
it was just another ordinary day in wizard school, or at least that’s what you thought. with your best friend donghyuck in your last class of the day, something bizarre happening was part of the package that came with him. you couldn’t even count the times he had accidentally cast a dangerous spell that blew up half of the room, and you’re honestly surprised that the room is still intact after all these years. even though that sounds bad, that isn’t even the worst of it.
besides almost blowing the room to smithereens every day, donghyuck also had the habit of misplacing his spell notes. you already knew that this habit of his would end up just causing problems for everyone, including himself, so to the best of your ability, you would help him find and organize his notes in spellcasting class every day.
however, even you were bound to make mistakes helping him with his notes, and it seemed like helping donghyuck would come back to bite you in the back today.
“y/n, do you remember where I said I was going to put my notes from yesterday? I can’t seem to find them.” he whispers from beside you, trying not to get yelled at by the teacher for talking when he wasn’t supposed to.
you sigh, setting down your pencil from writing notes, already planning on texting jeno later for the rest of the notes. “hand me your bookbag, hyuck.”
he does as he’s told and hands you his bookbag. once you’ve opened it, you can hear him whisper: “and please hurry, the teacher wants us to practice the spell from both yesterday and today in a few minutes.”
you quickly get to work to find the notes he had misplaced yesterday, taking out all of the papers he had carelessly stuffed in his bookbag and scanning over all of the spellcasting steps. unfortunately, another one of donghyuck’s habits was that he never titled his notes, so it was pretty impossible to discern which spell was which.
so far, you had slimmed it down to two sets of notes, however, another problem was that the steps for both spells looked exactly the same. it was up for your memory to remember which spell your class learned yesterday, and with donghyuck poking your shoulder to tell you that time was almost up, you had to pick the correct one, and fast.
with only a little time left, you ended up doing mental meeny miny moe to choose which spell sheet looked close to what spell you learned in class yesterday. you hand donghyuck back his bookbag and place the spell sheet on his desk. “hyuck, you really need to get into the habit of titling your notes, because it’s quite impossible to discern which spell is which. I’m not even sure if that’s the correct spell, to be honest.”
“yeah, yeah, I’ll just text you for the titles later. now, let’s go before the teacher yells at us for taking too long.”
you and donghyuck go over to a corner in the classroom with your spell sheets in hand to set up the spell. you two agree to let you go first with the first spell, then let donghyuck go, and continue in that fashion until you two are done with casting both spells.
you take one quick glance at donghyuck, to ask if he’s ready, and he sends you a smile before nodding. you look over your notes from the spell you guys learned today and start to trace a pentagon with a star in the middle of it with your wand. after doing so, you gently place your wand down on the desk closest to you and press your palms together. you close your eyes and focus all of your energy on the shape you made earlier with your wand, and a dark blue light starts to encompass both your body and donghyuck’s.
when you open your eyes, you’re relieved to see that the spell had worked and that donghyuck had now been trapped in a cube of ice. you then pick up your wand again and follow the instructions to cancel the spell and donghyuck shivers after he’s released from the ice cube.
donghyuck then casts the same spell onto you, and the following spell you cast onto him makes his hands feel like they’re on fire. you quickly dispel the spell you cast onto him, and now it was time for him to cast the same spell onto you. you were quite nervous and sure that the spell he would cast on you would be way worse than him accidentally blowing up half of the classroom.
“let’s hope this is the right spell from yesterday.” you breathe out, watching as donghyuck reads the instructions for casting the spell carefully. he pulls his wand out of his pocket and takes a look at you.
“yeah, let’s hope.”
after saying that, you watch as he traces an octagon with many various tiny shapes in it into the air with his wand. he then presses his palms together and focuses on the shape he drew into the air earlier, and soon enough, a dark pink light starts to encompass your entire body.
you furrow your eyebrows in confusion, as the light encompassing you looked entirely different from when you casted the second spell on him earlier. your jaw then suddenly drops when you realize. “wait, hyuck! I think this is the wro-”
before you could even finish your sentence, he had already finished casting the spell on you, and you could feel the effects already. your heart started to feel like it was beating out of your chest, and whenever you looked at donghyuck, your pulse would quicken, and a warm feeling would cover your entire heart.
“wait a minute… this spell… feels like… A LOVE SPELL!” you hear donghyuck yell out, and after he said those last three words, you knew it had to be true.
“YOU CASTED A LOVE SPELL ON ME?! WHAT THE FUCK!? REMOVE IT!”
“BUT I DON’T KNOW HOW TO! THERE WERE NO INSTRUCTIONS AS TO HOW TO CANCEL THE SPELL!”
“YOU WHAT?!”
at this point, everyone’s eyes were on you two in the classroom, and you knew that your teacher would reprimand you two afterward, but you didn’t care at this rate. what was more important was that donghyuck had accidentally performed a love spell on you and that the effects of this spell would last around a week before dispelling the spell would work.
“y/n and donghyuck! get out of my classroom right now!” your teacher screams at the two of you, and you guys slowly shuffle outside of the classroom and into the hallway. you two plop down beside each other as you put your head in your hands, not daring to look at the boy beside you.
“well, at least the spell wasn’t one that blew up half of the classroom like last time, am I right?” donghyuck bumps your shoulder from beside you, trying to lighten the mood, but it seemed to do the opposite.
you swat at his shoulder, not moving your head from your hands in fear that your heart will explode if you glance at him. “don’t even try to joke in this type of situation, hyuck. nothing you say will make me feel better. you casted a love spell on me AND we both made embarrassments of ourselves in front of the entire cast. how am I going to live this down?”
it’s silent for a while between you two, and you’re tempted to take a look at him to read his expression, but you know what you’ll face if you do so. you’re not really sure as to how you’re gonna handle being around your best friend all day with this love spell on you, since your heart basically explodes if you give him the tiniest of glance. you mentally note that you should invest in some sunglasses to wear for the next week before donghyuck starts to speak.
“hey, y/n. look at me for a second.”
“are you purposefully trying to make my heart explode into millions of tiny pieces? because if so, that isn’t fun-”
he moves one of your arms that was covering your face to get a good look at you, and once you two make eye contact, you can already feel your heartbeat pick up. he grins after he sees your expression, and you already knew that you weren’t going to survive the following week after this.
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w.c: 1,432 words ♡ warning(s): slight swearing ♡ pairing: donghyuck x reader ♡ genre: comedy/crack, some fluff
requested by: @hwanunjin​ (17 w/donghyuck~)
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allsassnoclass · 3 years
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okay so re: smutless long fics, I’ve tried to compile a list of fics as close to 50k words as possible since that’s the wordcount the anon cited and tbh my friends there really are not that many that I personally have read but I did my best.  All fics under the cut are over 30k and have either been verified good by me or my trusted friends
delete this transmission by @anxietycalling: 67k mashton sci-fi. I reread this one recently and it’s just as amazing the second time around I very highly recommend it
“Yeah,” he says, catching sight of his reflection in the dimly reflective surface and running fingers through his hair to fluff it up. And instead of getting on the mag-train home like he wants to, he catches the northbound train to the greenlawn with Calum. “You know, I think I might not go through with it,” he tells his best friend, meaning his activation. They sit together across from the back doors of the car and watch the adverts for an upcoming showing of ‘Titanic’ at the interactive theater. While Calum sits beside him silently he gnaws on a thumbnail and wonders whether it’s too late to get his money back.
“You can’t go back on it now,” Calum tells him.
And it’s true: His payment has already been processed, the credits removed from his profile. The invoice showed up in his e-net overnight and he’d added it to his encrypted folder. “It’s just - weird,” he says, weighing each of the words on his tongue before he speaks. “To be in charge of another person like that. I don’t want that responsibility.”
I’m a Falling Star by @pixiegrl: 55k lashton fantasy, very cute and sweet
A philosopher once asked, “Are we human because we gaze at the stars or do we gaze at them because we are human?” Pointless really. “Do the stars gaze back?” Now that’s a question.
Or: Ashton’s a shop boy setting out on a adventure to find a star to help grant a wish. Luke’s a star crashed to Earth looking for some help to get back home. They’re both in for more adventure than they bargained for.
I Wanna Sleep Next to You... by milecgv: 54k malum college au.  I read it over a year ago but I’m pretty sure I enjoyed it then
"Cuddle buddies, how can I help you?"
Pausing, Calum thought, he could just hang up. Get over the moment of weakness and face the rest of the night alone. He could do it. But the idea of spending one more second alone, brought a fresh pang of hurt to his heart and really, he couldn't bear it. Before his thought process could spiral out of control, the calm voice repeated itself.
"Um, yeah. I-, I need someone to-" He cut himself off because really, how was he going to phrase this?
Chuckling softly, the man on the other line interjected. "Sir, do you need someone to cuddle you?"
Shit, it was now or never. "Yeah. I-uh, I do." His voice came out so small, and he really hoped the man on the other side wouldn't pick up on how desperate he was.
~~~
Calum gets the opportunity to live out his dreams in New York City but it proves too much for him, and on a lonely night he ends up calling the professional cuddle service he swore he'd never call.
those are the only three completed fics over 50k that I personally can vouch for, but here are a few more longer ones I’ve read and I’ll link some over 50k that have gotten good reviews from my friends after those.
Destination: Perth by onlythevoid: 34k lashton 
The stranger swung into the seat next to him and sighed contentedly. Luke stole a glance from under his hat. It was a boy with light-brown messy hair, reminiscent of surfers Luke saw on the beach in Brisbane - he had a t-shirt on and black jeans, and fade-tint round-frame sunglasses propped on his straight nose.
The stranger caught Luke’s eyes.
“Hey?” The stranger asked. Shouldn’t have looked at him, Luke thought. Too late.
The stranger had set his sunglasses on his head and was peering below Luke’s cap. “Dude. You look terrible. Are you okay?”
Oh, so the stranger was one of those guys. Too friendly and ever-inquisitive. Yes, Luke looked like shit; he’d been crying for an hour at a time, every few hours, and all he’d had to eat in the past two days was some wet broccoli at the hospital and a bag of chips he’d bought that morning in Brisbane, and there were bruises all up and down his right arm from a car crash he wished he’d died in.
Luke didn’t say any of that. He prayed his voice would be steady and said, “Yes. Thanks.”
The messy-haired boy did not seem convinced. After a pause, he offered, “My name’s Ashton, by the way.”
hello, hello by @clumsyclifford: 30k lashton
For one long, blinking minute, Luke stares at Ashton and wonders if he’s hallucinating. Because that’s definitely Ashton. That’s Ashton Irwin, his former best friend from Sunny Days, the show they co-starred on as children.
But it’s also definitely Ashton Fletcher, professional film actor worth many millions, possibly hundreds of millions, of dollars, standing on his doorstep, wind ruffling his hair.
Now for the fics that I haven’t read but can confidently say are good through a rigorous peer review system (aka I have friends who read them/I have read and enjoyed other works by these people)
home is wherever you are tonight by @lifewasradical: 72k lashton. this one is on my tbr, I have only heard good things, and I’ve read other things by Amanda and trust her as a writer
Life has become so mundane in the past few years that there’s very little that sends a thrill up Luke’s spine anymore. It’s that idea that had him saying yes to the idea of moving out here for a few weeks anyways: the knowledge that this was a completely new place where no one knew his name. He could be anyone he wanted to be here, within reason. He wouldn’t be seeing any of these people again after May, so what’s the harm in becoming a new person for a bit? Someone not so bogged down by the shit in their head that they can’t get out of bed some mornings. Maybe this is a step in the direction of the person Luke wants to be in the future anyways.
Or, Luke inherits a beach house on a tiny costal island that needs some work. He didn't plan on falling in love with the guy at the hardware store.
world war series by prettyluke: 58k lashton historical au. Megs really likes this one and I trust her judgement
Even after months of seeing bodies ripped apart by bullets and bombs, Ashton still isn't prepared to be ripped apart by the fragile German soldier who has seen far more than any child should.
and
Luke shows up in Britain after 25 years right in time for World War Two to start, and Ashton has been waiting for someone to yank him from his melancholy since Christmas of 1914.
i’ll keep on fighting (just to make you believe) by @squishmichael: 33k muke I have heard good things about this one, have read other works by Taylor and trust them as a writer, and also I did skim this one when it first came out and it’s good I just need to sit down and fully read while paying attention
“Hi, Mike,” Luke says softly.
Michael might have cried from hearing his voice so clearly, not through a phone line, but instead his smile just gets bigger and bigger until his cheeks hurt.
“Hey, Luke,” he replies before throwing himself at Luke, arms looping around his neck and holding tight.
“Easy there, tiger,” Luke says with a chuckle, but he hugs Michael back.
It feels so different, all the shapes and sizes wrong, yet Michael has never felt so at home, melting right into the hug. Luke still fits so perfectly against him despite everything. Because it’s them, and they’re meant to be, and Michael never wants to let go.
*
In which Luke is finally coming home to Australia for the summer after two years, and everything should be perfect. Michael quickly realizes nothing is.
Under the High Low Lights I See You There by @pixiegrl: 33k lashton 90s bar au. I have heard a lot of good things and I have read and enjoyed Emily’s writing
Luke moves onto cleaning the glasses, sneaking glances over at him, admiring the open blue flannel he’s wearing with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows, his chest in the white tank top he’s wearing and the pull of it over his muscles, the acid wash denim pants straining over his thighs. He’s attractive and Luke knows he shouldn’t be looking, shouldn’t be so obvious in his stares, but he can’t help it. The man was made to be admired.
Or: It’s the summer of 1996 in New York City when Luke meets Ashton at his bar. Things aren’t always as they seem.
He Did Ballet by @kaleidoscopeminds: 34k cake. people love this one and meg is a great writer
Like the way he danced, everything in Luke's life was perfectly placed, an allegro exercise all on beat, an enchainment with no mistakes. The last thing he needed was a distraction, something to pull his attention away and make him stumble, like losing your spot during a series of fouettés. He glances back towards the bar and sees Calum still looking in his direction. Luke catches his eye again by mistake for just a second too long and Calum smiles slowly and winks at him. Luke shivers slightly and already feels slightly unbalanced. Calum is definitely not a good idea.
Luke's life is perfectly on track. He is about to get everything he's ever wanted, to become a Principal dancer for the Royal Ballet. He's focused, determined and nothing will get in his way. Then he meets Calum, a smooth-tongued barman with dangerous eyes, and suddenly not everything's so simple.
The Sun Is Burning Down Los Angeles by @burstingsunrise: 40k cake. have heard good things and Molly is a good writer
Calum probably signed a form saying he wouldn’t fall in love with the lead singer of the band. And he really doesn’t want to. What a cliché. It’s just…people get famous for a reason. This guy got famous for all the reasons.
***
Calum moves to LA to work for 5SOS.
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