#-hyperrealistic reliving of you narrowly escaping something like that

[g0reoz]

:|

#tw for csa mention and overall not great stuff being vaguely talked about #u gotta love when a dream about getting lunch turns into a dream about a psa on s*xual pr*dators to children which turns into a- #-hyperrealistic reliving of you narrowly escaping something like that #like what tha hell is my brain doing rn. can we not #i’m 100% convinced this is bc of the court thing at least partially bc that’s been fucking me up lately #and i only have around a month left #so there’s that #like the dream didn’t even end there it just ended with me running to my house and grabbing a gun and then i woke up #i have noticed that violence has definitely been a recurring thing in these dreams over the years #like my brain is trying sooo hard to rewrite everything so i have more power to defend myself physically/mentally/emotionally #bestie it’s not working <3 please stop trying i don’t want to deal with these fucking dreams again #i also don’t want to have to make more vent art as a way of dealing w this because i have Actual Fun Art that i’d rather work on #but sometimes that art is the only escape i have bc texts are monitored and i can’t just. talk to my parents bc of how closely- #-connected to religion this is too and how religious they are #they see him as some bitch-ass kid fucker which is bad enough but how do i explain that he also was one of the major contributors- #-to my religious trauma? like he was very much a c*tholic fundamentalist but i can’t get into that w/o my parents finding out all- #-the OTHER religion-related shit i had to deal with and am still dealing with #annnnyways yeah i just want to make fun art and not deal with any of this :’) sadly that’s not always the case tho #.woof.