#...no relation to the golden core issue nope not at all :)

[rnmyn]

Xianxian is three!

But literally.

(  ﾉ *´ ▽ `*) ﾉ ✧ SMOL ROUND WEI WUXIAN(S) ✧

You can find me on ko-fi now  ( ´ ᴗ ` )

#mdzsnet #dailyuntamed #mo dao zu shi #mdzs #the untamed #wangxian #mdzs fanart #wangxian fanart #wei wuxian #lan wangji #fanart #rnmyn.art #mixed and matched a few of their designs with the diff adaptations #a wwx for every day i'll spend stressed this week uwu #inappropriate use of forehead ribbon: tiny husband seatbelt #had to ask for assurance from bestie if the 蓝湛 i wrote looks fine #(if it doesn't that's on me im sorry!!) #bb!wwx and married!wwx are having the time of their lives being carried around by hgj #yllz is tucked in hgj's robes bc hgj is afraid he'll get cold #...no relation to the golden core issue nope not at all :)

[lydias--stiles]

“The simple act of being in love with you is enough for me.”

jiara | post-s2 | pining idiots | title: quote by Pacey from Dawson's Creek

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“Kie.”

“Hm?” The girl’s mop of curls obscured her face as she mumbled out some vowels, clearly still buzzed from the night before. An amused smile ticked up his lips and slapped her calf again. She sighed. “What?”

“Leggo,” he pushed, “we gotta get to Pope’s place.”

“Why?”

Even if everyone else would deny it, JJ swore Kie was as bad as he was: slow and fucking lethargic before eleven in the morning. Sure, she had better grades in school, but he wasn’t gonna give her more credit than that. Speaking of, “Helping him with that new scholarship, remember?”

The girl groaned and rolled over to face him, droopy eyes cracking open to scowl at him. She slept where he used to crash whenever his dad’s place became too much, but since the old man fucked off to Yucatán, he found peace in the quiet walls and cracked windows. Regardless, it was weird seeing her sprawled on this mattress, the boy almost able to envision himself beside her. A dangerous fantasy to linger on, so he pushed it aside and kept on trucking.

“C’mon, Kie.”

“Yeah, yeah,” she muttered and sat upright. “How did you even get in the Château?”

JJ grinned and snagged a key chain from his shorts. “Spare key. Duh.”

She rolled her eyes, uttering, “John B’s stupid,” and then pushed him out the guest room, telling him she’d get ready. His mouth opened to make the joke if he couldn’t stay and watch, but the door slammed in his face and that was that.

Having a crush on Kiara was the freakiest thing ever. First of all, JJ and emotions didn’t mesh well — it only led to trouble, a perfect example being his dad and him with the most fucked up dynamic to boot. He preferred to not even think about the man, though one glance in the mirror often betrayed his mind and brought a rush of memories to the forefront, whether it was a shiner against his eye, or the fact that he resembled his father when he was young.

So yeah, he didn’t like anything ‘love’ related. It was stupid. It was more reckless than buying a jacuzzi or trying to steal a golden cross from a boat with dozens of armed men. Friendship, however, was easy. He told the Pogues just that: they were ‘it’ for him, he’d go through fire for them, through hell and fucking back.

But he didn’t think he’d actually die for them, which almost happened when he tried saving Kie on the Coastal Venture — to which she ended up saving him. (A vision illuminated by a golden sun, hovering over him. He’d never forget it.)

While he inspected the contents of the fridge, embarrassingly filled with only beer, eggs, milk and junk food, the door creaked open and revealed a dressed and less-wrecked Kiara. His gaze flicked up and down her frame, quick, and then averted it back to the fridge.

“You got no food, man.”

She chuckled. “I know. It’s not exactly The Wreck type of food…”

“You haven’t gone back?”

“Nope,” she replied, curt, and moved past him to shove a container of sausages aside to grab a bottle of almond milk. Even if she wasn’t with her parents, she still somehow kept up her ‘no dairy’ principles.

Also, Kiara was hella beautiful. He hadn’t let it register when she walked in, but it was true. Her soft-looking, shiny skin, sporting the prettiest smile in all of the OBX, and she was just hot. Especially when she propped herself on the kitchen counter, to which he settled beside her to not look at her legs.

“How many scholarships are there?” she asked. “Like, I’m obviously proud of him, but…”

“He told us last night,” JJ laughed. “You were that fucking high?”

She giggled, “Yeah! You were there, I was just on my ass.” And then, quieter, “And… I don’t know, I guess I��ve been kind of distracted.”

He perked up, surprised. Though the Pogues were family, openly talking about emotions when it wasn’t prompted by anything, remained rare. They were better at talking shit and smoking and napping on boats. Whatever, he took the bait.

“Why?”

She shook her head. “It’s stupid, JJ.”

“Kie, you’re talking to me,” he nudged her shoulder, “throw me a bone here. Is it Pope? You got the hots for our favourite nerd again?”

Taking a sip from the bottle, her brow quirked up as though that was the stupidest thing he ever said, and retorted with, “Why’re you always doing that?”

His hands raised instantly, defensive. “Doing what?”

“You’re always digging, like, when I was with Pope you got all weird.”

“I don’t dig.”

“You do.”

“I don’t. Kie, what’s up?” He kept it moving before she found the core of his problem, and bounced back to the original issue. “Before I start saying shit to Pope.”

She scoffed. “You're full of shit.”

“Oh, Kie,” he drawled with a smirk. “You can do better than that.”

Silence fell. He waited, fiddling with his fingers, and quietly hoped Pope wouldn't be too annoyed when they arrived late — then again, they were begrudgingly coined 'tortoise and tortoise' by the group anyway.

She placed the bottle back in the fridge and sent him a rueful smile, one he often saw her showing Sarah before they went aside and had a private talk. Their eyes locked and she finally spoke.

“Sometimes, I… I miss my parents. And it's like, I don't get how they don't just accept that I'm a Pogue, that I'm friends with you guys, you know? But I still miss them.” She looked down at her feet, crossing at the ankles like a little girl waiting to be reprimanded by the teacher. “I miss my dad's hugs.”

Instantly, his arm swung around her for a gentle side hug, a grateful smile pulling on her lips as she leaned into him. Both knew they should savour a moment like this, as hugging with a twitchy JJ and often irritated Kie happened once every blue moon.

Ignoring the guilty look in her eye — yeah, he didn't understand missing a paternal embrace, rather used to a blow in the stomach or a crude remark, but that didn't mean he lacked empathy — he resisted the urge to encourage her to reconnect with them. Knowing her, she'd just close up and glare at him for the rest of the day.

So no, he wasn't going to ask her. And no, she shouldn't feel guilty. P4L 'til the end, baby.

“Thanks, JJ,” she whispered.

He snickered and pushed her off. “You can't tell the guys I'm becoming soft, dude. Theyʼll give me so much shit for it.”

“They know you're soft,” she teased, “don't even try.”

“I'm tough,” he tried.

“Like Play-Doh.”

“Whatever,” he mumbled and motioned at the kitchen door. “Let's go, Carrera. Before John B and Sarah come back and act all married.”

Now that was fucking annoying. After John B and Sarah faked their death, they got married by a bandana strip and hadn't let that notion go after returning. Sure, there was that small blip when they were fighting the crazy religious chick, but that was old news.

John B made him swear he wouldn't tell a soul, but the guy waxed poetry about Sarah whenever they were drunk and alone. It was hilariously sad. Another man lost to a girl.

(“She wants a beach wedding,” JB sighed a couple nights ago. “Nice, right?”

“I– yeah, I really don't care about this, man.”)

JJ knew that when he got a girlfriend (Kiara unintentionally but also very intentionally crossed his mind), he'd act normal. No mushy shit. No poetry. Definitely no creepy Romeo and Juliet references thrown in as if that shouldn't freak the Pogues out. Their behaviour better not be infectious.

Expectedly, Pope's scowl reached them all the way from the car, Kie and JJ sharing a sheepish look before stepping out.

“Gee, guys,” the boy deadpanned, “thanks for making haste. Really appreciate it.”

JJ's wide grin hoped to salvage it. Slapping his friend on the shoulder, he pushed past him and yelled, “Kie was dead, dude!”

Pope grimaced. “Don't joke about that.”

He watched as Kie stopped beside Pope with an apologetic expression, telling him she overslept and was sorry and that he knew how JJ was — “Always joking.”

His chapped lips pursed, a familiar punch hitting his chest with him then pretending it didn't hurt. She always did this. Even if she claimed she didn't, she always took Pope's side. Relationship or not. JJ knew she didn't owe him her 'side', but it'd be a nice change of pace either way.

Whatever. This wasn't the JJ Pining For Kiara Show. Pope needed their help.

A state-wide scholarship competition gave Pope another shot at winning a huge chunk of money (no gold type of rich though) and getting his ass out of OBX, hopefully launching himself into some fancy college when he revealed to be of Denmark Tanny's lineage. Those hibrow assholes loved a good sob story.

All Pope had to do was score hella high on some test — easy — and impress the panel — not so easy — and he'd be the luckiest Pogue of all.

But that did mean Kie and him had to sit on his creaky bed with a freaky amount of flashcards while a stressed out Pope paced around his room. He was pretty sure the floor was eroding.

Also, he had no fucking clue what any of the flashcards meant. Did Pope's smarts really attracted Kie that much? Was it the brain? Brain over brawl? But where was the fun in that? JJ loved Pope to death, but the guy had to be fully medicated or high before his brain shut off and he acted carefree.

“Pope, do you even know what this all means?” Kie bemoaned, flipping the cards around.

“You got a dictionary somewhere?” added JJ, squinting at the word aberration. It sounded like some weird disease. He showed him the word.

Pope dismissed it. “It means: different from the norm.”

“Dude, why not write that then?”

“Because they want aberration.”

He didn't get it. “No one uses it though.”

“JJ, that's just the way it is,” Pope pressed.

“Guys, stop,” Kiara interrupted. “But honestly Pope, it's so, like, elitist. None of these questions are important to the world, or the well-being of the people.”

“Sorry, Kiara, but unfortunately not everyone cares that much,” he sighed. JJ could tell they were starting to annoy their friend, their tortoise bullshit bleeding through.

Her nose scrunched up, peeved. “Right. Because there's a planet B just waiting to be used by us. Duh.”

“Ooh,” JJ drawled, nudging her arm. “Are there donkeys shitting money?”

Kie laughed. “Yes. All beaches, clean air, no Kooks, and money-shitting donkeys.”

“Nah, I want it to be hella Kooky,” he joked, gesturing wildly. “I want a yacht and tell people someone else does my laundry, or something.”

“You don't even do your laundry anyway,” she bounced back with a roll of the eye. “I know you force John B.”

“He's already playing House with Sarah, might as well wash my underwear, too.”

Oh, man. He could do this all day. Talking shit with Kiara went as smooth as fishing for him. Each time he thought he one-upped her, she threw more on top and kept it going 'til neither knew what the point even was anymore. Sarah dubbed it as 'banter' which he believed was a rich way of saying 'talking smack.'

“I don't believe you even know how to do it,” she challenged.

JJ huffed and crossed his arms. “I can do it.”

A smirk bloomed on her lips as she kept jabbing. “It's kinda cute, how you need John B to be your mom.”

“I don't.”

“You literally said it five seconds ago.”

“Guys,” Pope groaned, followed by an exhausted sigh eerily similar to Heyward. “Can we get back to the flashcards?”

Kie and JJ were too far into their discussion though, jabbing at each other at rapid speed. Then she threw her cards at him and all bets were off. He yelled she should make a goal with her hands, to which he folded up a flashcard and shot it straight between her fingers.

And that was when Pope kicked them out. JJ presumed it was a victory they lasted as long as they did. Kie kept apologising over her shoulder, prompting Pope to ask Cleo for help instead.

For a beat, they were silent stepping out of his place and back into the car. JJ felt a stab of guilt for fucking up Pope's study time, but it was hard to dial his brain to school when his friends surrounded him. Just when he wanted to ask if she felt bad too, she went off about the climate — as usual.

“It's so dumb how there were no questions about the environment or human rights or, or anything like that! It's all science and lit, like, there's more to life than fucking chemistry formulas!”

“I skipped those cards. Didn't get them.”

“It's so fucked,” she hummed. “And I'm obviously glad that you drove to the Château to wake me up and all—”

“Yeah?”

“—but I really wish those questions would matter. We almost died, JJ!”

“No, shit,” he grumbled, quickly starting to lose his patience with the ranting girl. She didn't even realise what the fuck she was saying anymore — what she did to his heart, skipping like some elemtary school girl on the playground, when she slipped some nice words in.

“Died!” she pressed. “Why even care about stuff like that?”

“Fucks sake, Kie—”

“And I didn't want to say it, but did you see how many flashcards there were? How many trees were cut for that? It's like, hello, Quizlet exists!”

“Kie, shut up!” he yelled.

Her mouth fell slack, gobsmacked, gawking at him like his interruption was a slap in the face.

Gesturing wildly with one hand, he exclaimed, “You know, you can just go on and on and I hear you talking and it's like, yeah, we get it, Mother Earth needs to be saved, we're fucked, you don't gotta repeat it twenty-four seven.”

“What the hell, JJ!”

“You have an opinion about everything! A man gets tired!”

“A man?” She scoffed. “You're not even eighteen.”

“Point is you don't gotta act all preachy all the time.” He turned the corner, hands tightening around the steering wheel.

Kie scowled. “Where is this coming from? I'm not preachy, I'm educating you.”

Now that was just fucking with his head. Incredulous, he exclaimed, “You think I don't listen? Kie, I'm the only one that does. JB is on Planet Sarah all the damn time and Pope only did shit 'cause—"

"That!” she yelled, throwing her hands up with frustration. “That's what I mean! You're doing it again! You dig!”

“What?!”

“Every time you mention Pope and I, you dig. You needle!” Twisting in her seat, his gaze flickered to catch her disgruntled expression. “Why do you do that? It's so… sus.”

JJ laughed. “Sus?”

“You don't ask John B about Sarah.”

“'Cause they're fucking obvious.”

“Still,” she pressed. “Did I do something to piss you off? Is that it? Is it me constantly asking you to recycle and yet — shocker! — you never do?!”

“Fucking God,” he grumbled under his breath.

With frazzled thoughts and shaking hands, adrenaline coursed through him as he swerved to the side of the road and stopped the car. If he fought with Kie any longer to this degree of fuckery, they were gonna crash.

She frowned. “What're you doing?”

“You, Carrera, are driving me insane,” he deadpanned, matter-of-fact. Then he slammed the door open and stepped out, desperate to catch his breath.

In the back of his mind, he had an inkling as to why he was so keyed up. Kiara would call him a Neandethal, but fuck it, here was the truth: Kiara was hot as hell when she argued with him.

Following his lead, she got out, her sneakers stomping against the asphalt. The sun steeped low on the horizon, the light hitting the hood and reflecting onto her face; her curls shifting from dark brown to gold. Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck. He was so fucked. He almost missed the start of her spiel, too enthralled.

“I'm driving you insane? I'm always getting you out of trouble, because you never think things through! You never see the bigger picture!”

He rolled his eyes. “Bigger picture? The only thing I see, Kie, is you going on about nature. That easy.” And then, before he could stop himself, he spewed out, “And you don't have to do that.”

“What?”

“Getting me out of trouble,” he said, pursing his lips. “That's not your responsibility.”

“Right. Duh. Because after everything we've been through, I can't care about you,” she exclaimed, face twisting up in pure fury. She got in his space, shoving his shoulder, but when he didn't budge, it only seemed to anger her more.

JJ didn't know what was going on anymore. Why was she so mad? Even if she didn't want to admit it, he was telling the truth. Of course all the Pogues had each other's back, but Kiara doted over him more than was necessary. The constant checking of injuries, limiting his day drinking, all that. Like he was some child!

He leaned in and mumbled, “I can take care of myself.”

Kie smirked. “Then do your own laundry.”

It happened naturally. One second he stared at her furious eyes and thought about how much he loved arguing with her despite the bullshit, the next his fingers curled into her hair and pulled her in a fierce kiss.

At first, her hands laid frozen on his shoulders, surprised, but the moment he realised his impulsive decision was a mistake, they slid around his neck and kept him close.

JJ sighed in relief and deepened the kiss he'd been craving ever since they were fourteen and Kie went from gangly to statuesque. Her lips were warm and soft and her hands were soft and she hadn't let go and holy shit — he was kissing Kiara Carrera.

The kiss lessened when her mouth quirked into a smile, their grins pressing flush together, and JJ shivered from delight. Oh, man. He was gone.

“You drive me damn crazy, Kie,” he murmured, voice dropped to an undeniably soft tone.

She bit back her silly grin and whispered, “Good.”

Taking a deep breath, he tried focusing up, but all he could do was stare at her face. A shy hand grabbed hers.

He had to get it out of the way now, or else he'd kick himself later. “I'm… really into you. I'm– oh, fuck, uh–”

“Maybe we can talk about it not on the side of the road?” she suggested, amused.

JJ grinned, elated (What was the word he saw on the flashcards? Exalted!), and kissed her again, because he could.

On the ride back to the Château, he confessed to seeing her in a different light for years, while she couldn't really pinpoint a time or moment, that it just happened. It didn't matter, though he was in utter disbelief that he and Kie were having this conversation. No jokes, no BS, all seriousness. Tomorrow, he'd wake up and it wouldn't be some sick dream. Kie liked him back.

JJ was sure he'd doubt himself or overthink it in the future, but today, he'd bask in the certainty and the major ego boost.

“Okay, but did you ever legit like Pope then?”

A sheepish smile crawled up her cheeks as her gaze averted to the window. “I thought I did. But we have, like, no chemistry, so…” She shook her head. “I was confused.”

“That's okay,” he uttered. He couldn't give her shit for it. Even if he did torture himself with their short-lived relationship, he understood.

How would he react though? John B and Sarah wouldn't care, or Cleo, but Pope? He didn't want one of his brothers hating him. Being iced out by the guy fucking sucked, as it meant he was truly hurt and therefore meant JJ truly fucked up. He couldn't handle disappointing him.

Kie read his mind. “He'll be fine with it.”

“I dunno, man…”

“He will,” she repeated. “We're Pogues. We've all narrowly survived death. And besides…” She turned back to him with a secretive grin. “I think he has a thing for Cleo.”

Whoa. He did not see that coming. His brows shot up to his hairline, mentally kicking himself for being so focused on Kie that he didn't even notice the shift of interest between Pope and Cleo. They made sense, too. Know-it-all's, but well-meaning, and only speaking when needed.

If the idea didn't relief him of worries, he'd be concerned as to why they were all seamlessly coupled up like in some 90s sitcom Big John had on VHS.

“What a player,” he joked.

“Tell me about it.”

They arrived at the house, the Twinkie and Sarah's bike sprawled on the overgrown front lawn. JJ frowned. He had hoped to have some alone time with Kie, not to jump her bones and fulfill a regular dream of his, but to talk. To figure it out. He wanted to do this right. Because after everything, they deserved to have good things, to start on a high note — he deserved it.

Kie noticed it, too. Puckering her lips on contemplation, her gaze trailed from him to the rest of the property, ending on the trusty ol' hammock. She jabbed her thumb at it.

“Let's sit there.”

Normally, they laid on opposite ends on the hammock, if they even shared one to begin with. But now, she pressed herself right beside him and he felt like heaven dropped down on them in the best way possible. He suddenly understood what John B was lamenting about — the company, intimacy, the ease. Nerves rippled through his body like a summer storm, but he figured that was what it cost to lose one's mind over a girl.

He didn't know what to say, so Kiara spoke instead.

“I don't want us, the way we are around each other, to change, you know?” she said. “Like, I don't want you to think you have to act like some mellow ass boyfriend all of a sudden.”

He smirked. “Who said anything about boyfriend?”

“Bye.”

“Hey, wait,” he grinned, latching onto her arm before she pushed herself out. “C'mon, Kie.”

Her nose scrunched up. “I don't do this usually, okay?”

“You think I do?” he asked. His hand softly slid down to wrap around hers, to which she hooked their fingers together. Okay. Wow. It felt so damn nice that it propelled him to say, “I wanna be your boyfriend, Kie.”

The girl smiled and then surprised him by leaning in herself, pressing a gentle kiss on his chapped lips. It was overwhelming having her instigate it, his gut twisting up in excitement like when he was about to backflip from a boat, or cliff dive, or something similar like that.

He let go of her hand to cup her cheeks, only to whisper, “That's a yes, yeah? Gotta get a yes.”

“Yes, JJ,” she uttered back. “Here's to not fucking this up.”

“Cheers, baby.”

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#jiara #outer banks #obx #obx fanfiction #otp: cause i'll come #It's messy but in a cute way

[writing-frenzy]

Airplane Crossing Over Plots~

Like it says on the tin, these were ideas I had for crossovers involving our fav writer~ (EDIT: Thank you @guiltycorp for inspiring this a bit XD)

Now, I’ve mentioned before, with Airplane choosing the go home option, he ends up still with a golden core in all this mess but he needs to cultivate his body really carefully because of it. (come on, he put in all the time and effort to be an immortal master, he should be able to still have his bad ass skills; not to mention with it being a soul thing, because a golden core is just as spiritual as it is physical, so he will definitely still have it.)

So, sealing his core and having his Nascent Soul outside his body to relieve some of the pressure on it, (having it look like a little chibi SQH that usually hangs out in hoodie pockets or hiding in Airplane’s hair with an aura of disguise around it), Airplane has to go and actually work out, which isn’t too much of a hardship for him at least, seeing as he’s had years to get into a routine and survival instincts kicking in to help him out there.

And, he may have actually started taking school seriously again, actually applying himself, maybe even getting an online accounting job to help supply his income. When he’s steady with that, he finishes PIDW the way he had been leading up to, the ending that makes the most sense and satisfices the writer the most (and if it gives him some closure, he isn’t saying anything about that.) Now that he is finally free from PIDW, and has college and work to worry about, he writes whenever he damn well pleases, and whatever he wants to fuck what anyone says.

(He might or might not write some absolutely filthy porn whenever the mood hits him, and cackles how his fans both greedily read it and cry because his newer works are so tragic, even if they have happy endings at times. Yes, Airplane Shooting Towards the Sky is a porn writer, but first and foremost is he an angst writer more~ His fan’s tears and cries just make him stronger kind of writer~)

(I just honestly want Airplane to write what he wants to now, that is one of the biggest motives behind all this honestly)

So, we have the set up :D let’s get to what we can cross over here~

First Up: ~Cutivation Group Chat~

Come on, how can one resist this? Plopping good old Airplane into this wild ride is one of the few things that makes me so happy in life. The thought of it makes me grin, especially since it can go two ways in my opinion~

First way: Airplane replaces Song Shuhang; like, just seeing Airplane, who was an Immortal Master and Teacher in those situations would be so funny, yet intriguing as well to see how he handles it, because you know he’ll be able to, just in ways no one ever expects. (Besides, that werid luck of Shuhang’s would be perfect for him, tho he won’t seek death like the other would~ :D Airplane still has a lovely sense of self-preservation~)

Second way: Airplane is one of Song Shuhang’s roommates. (for this, I’m going to say their Dorm was big enough for five peeps, because I want Airplane to have more friends damn-it.) Just... the imagery of the two neutral disasters getting into so much mayhem and hijinxs together, giving Song Shuhang not only a friend/brother in arms he can always depend and rely on, but also a steady source for learning and cultivation as well :D

(Also, Airplane and Gou Moumou being writer friends, the two of them able to bounce ideas on to each other (oh god, now you have inspired me, how dare you make me write this./hahahaha, you know you want too/ bitch turnabout is fair play/ ah fuck.) also: just the image of Airplane meeting Senior White and being completely unaffected because not only is his survival instincts going in overdrive, but also:

Airplane: ? He’s not my type.

Everyone: *jaws dropped*

:D Anyways~

Second Idea: Card Room (Rebirth)

Now First, for those who don’t know Card Room (Rebirth), this is an action/survival/mystery thriller BL Unlimited Flow type of novel; it follows one Xiao Lou, a medical professor who specializes with examining the dead, and his journeys through multiple rooms after having died in reality, the difficulty of each of these rooms measured with Playing Cards from 2 to K and with different types of rooms being sorted by their suits of Hearts (Mystery), Diamonds (Puzzle), Spade (Survival), Club (Luck/Money). The Goal of the story is to beat all the rooms and return back to the world of the living once more. To aid in this, people can get special cards to help them fight/ take care of their health/ or even just daily life essentials to be able to actually get through places. 

So... this means after getting all used to living once more and getting into his grove in the modern world... Airplane unfortunately kicks the bucket, yet again! Thing is, this time it happened after he played a card game with some of his roommates, I’m going to say poker, and they were betting who would do what chores. Aiplane managed to make out pretty well, and was pleased with it, so was very much bummed when he ended up dying yet again.  He goes through the room, some by the skin of his teeth, but with his cultivation abilities still usable (can’t stop something on a soul level here) he gets by okay. Though, all his cards either deal with writing, supplies, and the rare cultivation one at times.

He gets by at least.

Now, because this series gives me some emotions, here is one thing I will say: Airplane and Liu Ying end up partnering up and break through together, because damn it, Liu Qiao and her sis deserve some damn happiness ;-; Maybe Airplane and Liu Ying meet by chance, Airplane impressed by the young woman’s intelligence and Liu Ying can in turn be grateful for Airplane’s resourcefulness. Maybe even include the original girl that Liu Ying teamed up with, So we have three people already in your team to survive! (because surviving the rooms 2-4 is already damn amazing considering how hellish they get :D ) 

This is a fun crossover for me to imagine honestly, because it would be perfect to showcase Airplane’s skills in logic, reasoning, and pure survival our boy is known for; let that resourceful and logistic riddled mind out to play as he fights to get the fuck out of this world, even if The City of the Moon is beautiful and all.

:D So, those were the ideas I would like to really see, but here is some more for anyone curious:

Honorable Mentions: These are ones I would love to see Airplane accidently going into, and just going yikes, or nope! or even ‘Really?’

Lord of End of World:

... This story, it concerns me greatly; I like the worldbuilding, even has a few really cool girls in it, and I find the protagonist rather curious (to an extent, blackened Gary Stu that he is...) but does it make me cringe at times with the underage theme to it; it’s part of their cultivation and all, but god damn does the way this story push some of it really sqink me out, I had to drop it because it made me so uncomfortable, so just a heads up there. this is one of those stories that makes me want to write spite fiction, but also make me cringe at the thought of remembering it at times.

Anyways, so, how it boils down to it is that this poor guy, known as the Young Master of the Unground Palace, was abused in all the ways one can practically be abused, just so their Master can get stronger themselves by forming the perfect cauldron to absorb, but who manages to kill their master only to die as well. He ends up transmigrating into Gong Lixin, a 16 year old wealthy young master about a year (I believe) before the apocalypse happens... (Like I said, I have so many damn issues with this damn story, I cry.)

Just, on one hand, imagining Airplane in this world also makes me laugh (and maybe hope), because maybe here Gong Lixin could actually learn a cultivation style thats not only suited to him, but also doesn’t need him to dual cultivate all the time and rely on cauldrons (maybe get some needed therapy as well, Airplane knows some peeps; I can dream~), he can have a stable, reliable teacher here who will have no lust or attraction to him, Airplane helping the kid out at first because they look like they’re recovered from a really bad Qi-Devitation and the teacher in him can’t leave that alone. Airplane can also relate with the youth about transmigrating, maybe even telling him about his own time with that. (And Airplane can use his own cultivation to smack around any bitch looking sideways at his student, because fuck that shit, he is only seventeen and traumatized.) Just, turning this story into a cute mentor and discipleship and emotional healing would make me so happy.

Monster Inn Rectification Report

So, this is another Transmigration story~ MC transmigrates as a poor canon fodder son, who would have ended up in a vegetable state after being neglected in favor of the super amazing awesome adopted son. He then goes on to accidently inheriting a supernatural end for Monsters~

Like, this idea makes me grin evilly; though things will change up a bit, since both of Airplane’s parents have already split up and have their own families? Just, the Former An Ding Peak Lord running an Inn? :D Building it from ground up from bascially nothing? :D Oh, man, this man has run worse things, and even a Demon Kingdom, he got you~

Supernatural Movie Actor App

Its a BL about a guy with a split personality who does realistic (as in for real) horror movies through an app, to get his wish to come true.

This actually goes really good with my idea of Airplane wanting to be an actor and all, only to have his dreams crushed :D He doesn’t at first realize what he is getting into when he gets the app, thinking it might be a chance for him to still be able to do his dream, only, surprise, surprise, he ends up entering a real life Horror movie environment~ I’m really curious about what he would dream about~

I Have Medicine

:D Airplane and Gu Zuo interactions make me smile~ these two would be so fun, seeing them bounce off each other would be a treat.

So What if You’re Reborn

.... hahahahahaha, oh, the chaos that could be unleashed in this timeline would be glorious~

Running Away From the Hero

:)

#SVSSS #Scum Villain Self Saving System #Scum Villain Self-Saving System #Airplane Shooting Toward the Sky #Shang Qinghua #Cultivation Group Chat #Card Room (Rebirth)

[aspiringprofessionalnerd]

Wei Wuxian and the Trauma of the Burial Mounds

Sorry folks I am officially In My Feels after therapy this week, and then I came online this afternoon to see that @hunxi-guilai has knocked it out of the park with their analysis again. I love to see that people are talking about the portrayal of WWX’s trauma on a larger level, and I wanted to add my two cents:

Pre-Resurrection

First of all, I want to acknowledge that WWX is far from the only person who experiences trauma throughout the course of CQL ahem Jiang Cheng . Even WWX endures various types of trauma throughout his first life. But what I’m so impressed (and gutted) by is the way in which the show establishes that it is WWX’s first stint in the Burial Mounds specifically that breaks him (or, at least, catalyses his breakdown). 

We know WWX has had a difficult childhood and teen years. He lost his parents at a young age and had to survive on the streets for an unspecified amount of time, facing physical and logistical hardships like running from dogs and battling starvation (no cultivation training yet, so no opportunity to train inedia) as well as the grief of losing his parents. Yet, remarkably, aside from his lingering fear of dogs, these incidents don’t seem to leave too many lasting physical or emotional scars. WWX is able to jump around and play with his adoptive brother on his first night at Lotus Pier, and when we see him in his teen years at Cloud Recesses Summer Camp he is a warm, bubbly individual with no reservations about physical contact (on the contrary, he’s more gung-ho about it than LWJ would like). He remains open to new experiences and new people, and even though he uses humour to obfuscate at times, the people close to WWX can still see through to his deeper intentions (take, for example, Yanli reminding Jiang Cheng that WWX is serious about the important things). Moreover, once the Jiang siblings and WWX return to Lotus Pier, we gain a greater appreciation for the past things WWX has survived, including years of verbal abuse some awkward family dynamics. Madam Yu’s words obviously hurt him, but even so he bounces back almost immediately and diverts his attention to comforting Jiang Cheng despite the fact that he is still recovering from Teenage Mutant Murder Turtle injuries himself. I think there is an important distinction to be made here: it’s not that criticism and harsh conditions just roll off of WWX. He DOES process and internalise them, but he keeps going and maintains his faith and openness in spite of having these negative experiences. Clearly, he is a remarkably resilient person. 

After the massacre at Lotus Pier and Jiang Cheng’s loss of his golden core, we see WWX wrestle with more complex emotions: grief, guilt, and concern. It’s obvious that Wei Wuxian is suffering acutely, but he’s still doing it in a way that’s very true to his character as we know it. He’s crying. He’s seeking physical comfort from Yanli. He’s proactive, looking to plan and problem-solve. Yes he balks a little at what JC’s core recovery will involve, but his overall reaction is primarily one of satisfaction and relief. 

We don’t see too much of WWX between the mountaintop ordeal and his dropping into the Burial Mounds, but I think we have enough material to say that he is still in command of his own mind and maintains his sense of agency. You can tell that our Wee Sweaty Boi has been through the wringer, but he’s still quite animated and even cheeky when facing off against Wen Chao and Wen Zhuliu in the teahouse. That dog speech? Damn. Classic WWX. He might die, but he’s not going down without getting the last word. It’s only when they are all riding swords to the weirdest and most out of place glam rock score in the entire series wtf over the Burial Mounds that we see an inkling of genuine horror cross WWX’s face.

Take now, by contrast, WWX’s reactions and interactions post-Burial Mounds. His flinchy moments inspired such a visceral reaction in me. I’m a repeat trauma survivor as well, and when I saw the way that WWX jerked back from NHS’s hand, it was deeply uncomfortable to watch precisely because of how familiar it was. This is an instinctive, almost animalistic response to touch, and it’s a FEAR response. Moreover, this isn’t some rando about to bump into him; this is one of his best friends from childhood. This is the reaction of someone who has survived by believing that the only possible safe space he has is within the confines of his own body; if anyone touches that, it will shatter. Wei Wuxian’s logical mind can tell him that NHS is not a threat, but his trauma-brain can’t turn off the panic simply by knowing that. (And why should he trust his logical mind, anyway? As we get glimpses of in the first few moments of the Burial Mounds, it’s as much the voices of people he knows and loves as the voices of unnamed resentful souls that prey on him during those three months. The psychological trauma in the Burial Mounds was not just the introduction of external threats, but the convoluting of things WWX knew and loved into instruments of torture so that even once he returned to the world, he could not shake those negative associations.)

We get an equal-but-opposite illustration of WWX’s trauma in instances like his reunion with JC and LWJ or his soup session with Yanli. There’s a deadness behind the eyes, an uncanny stillness. Wei Wuxian is in survival mode, going through the motions of what ‘should’ be his return to normal life but wondering why it doesn’t feel right this time. Wei Wuxian had told himself in the Burial Mounds that all he needed to do was survive the Burial Mounds themselves and then everything would be alright: he would go back to Lotus Pier, JC would be healed, and he would make up a new version of the plan that had been shot to hell (I’m convinced that WWX DID originally have a plan for how to navigate life in Lotus Pier post-golden core; however, he never got to put that plan into place because he got dumped into the Burial Mounds before he could enact it). But Wei Wuxian returns, and what he’s told himself isn’t true, because in all his planning for returning to Yunmeng he didn’t account for the fact that what it took to get there would fundamentally alter him. As a result, Wei Wuxian doesn’t fit anymore--not because the world has changed, but because Wei Wuxian has changed. And he can’t talk about that with anyone.

Why not? Sure, in part it’s because he feels bound to keep the secret about Jiang Cheng, but I think there’s another aspect here that’s been significantly overlooked: namely, that Wei Wuxian is the ONLY person to survive the Burial Mounds in any kind of living cultural memory. The problem isn’t so much that he can’t tell people as it is an issue of no one being able to understand or relate to his experiences even if he did share them. After all, how do you convey to an outsider what it was like to survive for three months in a place where every single bit of torture was customised to draw on YOUR individual, personal fears and hurts? Significantly, this is also the point in the story where we see Wei Wuxian begin to answer questions by in turn asking, ‘Would you believe me if I told you...?’ The question is rhetorical: he doesn’t expect people to believe him (although it still hurts when they don’t), but even if they do believe, it’s still not enough because they don’t understand. IMO, the rest of WWX’s issues leading up to the cliff at Nightless City stem from him trying--and failing--to come to terms with the loneliness of that knowledge.

Post-Resurrection

After WWX comes back, we see a shift in him. He’s no longer focused on the fact that no one will understand him; he’s decided that having someone (namely LWJ) believe him is enough. This resolves many of the auxiliary issues that had been plaguing WWX before his death, but it does NOT resolve the original trauma of his first experience in the Burial Mounds. WWX continues to have nightmares, and what are they about? Not Lotus Pier. Not Qiongqi Way and his sense of guilt. Not Shijie getting stabbed right in front of his face. Not his final, distraught moments with LWJ and JC. Nope, his nightmares continue to revolve around falling into the Burial Mounds all those years ago: an experience for which even death and rebirth are insufficient to ease the pain. 

I’m convinced that even at the end of CQL Wei Wuxian still has a LOT of healing to do, and I think this healing is not something that can happen through Lan Zhan’s love alone. Thank goodness for fanfic and headcanons, eh?

**Gentle reader, this turned out to be more like 50 dollars than two cents. Thank you for reading to the end if you’re still with me!

TL;DR I believe Wei Wuxian’s turning point moment in the story is his dumping into the Burial Mounds. It’s easy to get swept up in how many terrible things happen to him AFTER that in the lead-up to Nightless City, but I genuinely think he could have endured the loss of his Jiang family, the censure of LWJ, and society turning against him if he had not been psychologically broken during his first three months there. The writers, directors, and Xiao Zhan give us a very raw, real version of what trauma looks like with their depiction of post-Burial Mounds WWX, and it is utterly harrowing.

#cql #xiao zhan #big angst vibes #the untamed #meta #wei wuxian #i've edited this too many times because i'm a perfectionist #but it's still a mess because i've picked up slang from each country i live in #also talking about my own feelings? #nope don't like that one bit #projecting hard #ptsd #mdzs

[aproblematicpanda]

IF YOU ARE BORED I WILL APPEAR: the 100 for the in depth fandom questions 💖💖

Excellent timing, I just sent you an ask, too! :D Thanks babe. <3 I feel like I have so much more to say than I just did but the inspiration seems to have bailed on me. Oh well. If you have any follow-up questions hmu!

Top 5 favorite characters: Octavia, Echo, Lexa, Lincoln, Murphy Other characters you like: Gaia, Raven, Emori, Monty, Harper, Diyoza Least favourite characters: Clarke, Abby, Kane Otps: Octavia and Lincoln, Lexa and Clarke, Bellamy and Echo Notps: Bellamy and Clarke, basically anything involving Abby Favourite friendships: Murphy and Raven, Monty and Jasper Favourite family: Spacekru Favourite episodes: 4x10, 5x02, probably more but I can’t really think of anything else right now (I appreciated 7x02 but I’m not quite sure yet if I’m gonna call it a favorite, that will depend on how the rest of the season turns out) Favourite season: Season 2 Favourite quotes: “We’re back, bitches!” “I don’t choose pain. I choose life.” “Not everyone. Not you.” “ You're the most beautiful broom in a broom closet of brooms.” “ I can't change the tide if the moon won't cooperate. It's basic physics.” (I’m including this last one because of an amazing Monty/Jasper gif set I saw once.) Best musical moment: Ehh... Well I stll tear up basically every time I hear Cloud by Elias, the song that played during Lincoln’s death scene. It’s an amazing song and anything related Lincoln’s death still gets to me, not just because of the characters but also because of everything that went on with Ricky and everything he was put through, it’s just... it’s a very loaded moment in the series as well as behind the scenes. I’m not sure ‘best’ is the right word here but it’s the moment I’m going with. Moment that made you fangirl the hardest: When Octavia became Skaikru’s champion. I found it rather poetic that a young woman who had been spat out by her community simply for being born was their only hope for survival. Plus, she looked incredible. When it really disappointed you: It’s not just ‘a moment’ but I’ve been really disappointed by the show’s treatment of Octavia and how its hypocrisy concerning other characters who have done way worse shit than Octavia yet they are patted on the back and protected for it by the narrative. It aggravates me. I’m not mad that Octavia has had it rough, when a character gets everything handed to them on a golden platter with no real consequences, that’s boring. But it makes me mad that she’s the only one who has to pay for her mistakes and none of the others have to, and the way the characters are now comfortable joking about what has been the most traumatizing, horrifying and scarring thing anyone has ever had to go through really pisses me off. Octavia deserves so much better, the show really dropped the ball here. I’m also extremely disappointed by the way the show handled Lexa’s death. Octavia survived a sword through the gut and falling off a big ass cliff, but Lexa can’t take a stray bullet in the presence of someone who is meant to be a doctor? I mean I get that this was supposed to prove that we’re all vulnerable and that even Lexa, Heda of the thirteen clans can’t escape death, but come on. Also the way Jason treated the Clexa fandom was gross. Saddest moment: The moment Bellamy called Octavia “the queen of cannibals”. Up until that point I held onto hope that things would get better, that the show would still turn things around, that everything Octavia had been put through would be put into perspective when she could tell the one she loved the most about the horrors the bunker put her through. But when Bellamy called her that, it was made clear that not only did he find out about the most traumatizing part of his sister’s life (and it’s not like it lacked trauma before) but he also didn’t care. It was the moment where I had to give up hope that they could ever get to a place where I would respect and care for their dynamic again and it made me sad, because Octavia deserved so much better. Most well done character death: Oh god, this is a difficult one, because I have issues with most of the main characters’ deaths lol. So I’m gonna go with Nia for this one, because I really liked that Lexa recognized who the real threat was and took matters into her own hands and did what she could to maintain the coalition. I can’t think of another death that I didn’t hate. Favourite guest star: Probably Jessica Harmon Favourite cast member: Marie Avgeropoulos Character you wish was still alive: Lincoln, hands down. So many things would be different right now if he had still been around. One thing you hope really happens: I hope Bellamy and Echo are endgame and not just that, I also hope that the show will allow Bellamy to treat Echo with the love and respect she deserves. Because so far the show hasn’t really shown their relationship much respect and most of the effort is coming from Echo’s side and I don’t care much for that. Bellamy clearly loves her a lot, so I hope the writers will let him show and prove that to us in the final season. Most shocking twist: I don’t really think the 100 is good at shocking twists? You see most of them coming from miles away lol. When did you start watching: When it came out, basically. :) Best animal/creature: Helios! Favourite location: Ehh... I’m gonna go with the dropship or Arkadia, not because I love those places so much but because they’re where the show’s best seasons (one and two) basically happened. Trope you wish they would stop using: BYG One thing this show does better than others: Pissing off its fanbase! :’D Funniest moments: Most of Monty and Jasper’s interactions in the earlier seasons, those two were amazing. Couple you would like to see: I wish the show would make Niylah and Octavia a thing even if I don’t passionately ship it. I also became a huge fan of Clarke and Gaia! Actor/Actress you want to join the cast: I really don’t know anyone for this question... I’m a big fan of Kristen Stewart so I’d probably be thrilled with that, but it’s not something that I actively want or anything. Favourite outfit: Ehh... As much as I hate to say this, Clarke does get the best outfits and I think I’m gonna go with the dress she wore early in season 6. I’m also a huge fan of Octavia’s grounder look bw. Favourite item: Lincoln’s diary Do you own anything related to this show: Nope What house/team/group/friendship group/family/race etc would you be in: Well I don’t know which one I would be in, but Spacekru or Trikru seem like the most fun so I’d want to be a part of one of those! Most boring plotline: I never really cared for the City of Light although I will admit that storyline had a lot of potential, I’m just not sure the show really handled that well? Most laughably bad moment: The fact that Clarke just becomes anyone’s leader anywhere while not doing anything for it. And how fast she was forgiven and integrated into Spacekru in season 6 while doing the bare minimum to work for their forgiveness and showing no signs of remorse or wanting to change. Best flashback/flashfoward if any: I really liked the flashbacks of Octavia’s childhood, they did a good job of portraying what life had been like for her and it helped us understand her character better, even if they were short and limited to one episode. I also really enjoyed watching Octavia during those ten years in Skyring, but I’m not sure those qualify as a flashback and I do have some issues with them, still, so I’m gonna go ahead and stick with 1x06. Most layered character: Octavia, hands down Most one dimensional character: Oh god, how do I answer this... Of the core group I guess I would go with Raven. And that isn’t because I don’t love her, because I very much do, it’s the show’s fault for not really digging into anything that’s related to her. She’s just in the background until they need her to fix a problem they’ve been having or until they need someone to be tortured, or lately when they need to make Clarke look less horrible. She just doesn’t really get much else to work with, we don’t know what motivates her, we barely see her feel a type of way about the things she’s put through and when she does get a voice, it’s obviously meant to create sympathy for other characters so... yeah. Scariest moment: I don’t find it a very scary show hahaha. Grossest moment: The graphic scene of Lincoln’s execution, it was in such poor taste, especially considering everything that had been going on with Jrot and Ricky. Best looking male: Murphy Best looking female: Octavia and Echo Who you’re crushing on (if any): Octavia and Echo Favourite cast moment: Ehh, I don’t really keep up with the cast so idk? I did love Marie calling Echo Octavia’s sister-in-law though. Favourite transportation: None I think, I don’t really care? Most beautiful scene (scenery/shot wise): The one that comes to mind right away is the one of Octavia swimming towards the surface after she ran into the anomaly, it’s just such a pretty shot. Other than that, well, The 100 is shot in a beautiful environment so a lot of their scenery is gorgeous but I just immediately thought of this one. Unanswered question/continuity issue/plot error that bugs you: Jason’s blabbing about the damn worms. The way 3x01 felt completely disconnected from everything that happened in 2x16 also still bugs me. And how it feels as if the new writers never really saw the previous seasons and instead just read character descriptions, I feel like they didn’t really grasp the relationships and stuff like that in season 6. Best promo: Ehh, I usually just watch the episodes so I don’t really have an opinion about this. Loved the uproar the one for season 7 caused, though, because I’m a sucker for drama hahaha. At what point did you fall in love with this show/book: As soon as I met Octavia, she’s my baby and you will have to take her from my cold. dead. hands.

Send me a show/fandom and I’ll answer

#the 100 #ask

[ginnyzero]

Completely Harmless Ch. 30

Completely Harmless An SSO SilverGlade Re-imagining Story (Or Fix it Fan Salt fic) By Ginny O.

When Lily and her friends wanted to buy horses and were directed to the Silverglade Manor and its myriad of problems, they didn’t expect to start a revolution. They were just a bunch a stable girls. Completely harmless. Right?

A/N: Things are only canon if I say they’re canon. Pre-Saving the Moorland Stables compliant for the most part. Posted in its entirety on my website. Posted in 2000 to 4000 word bits here. Rated T for Swearing Word Count 177,577

Chapter Thirty A Very Bad First Meeting... Twice

Alex Cloudmill, beanie cap and all, strolled into the temporary pavilion with a look of complete and utter awe on her face. Like, she couldn’t believe everything she was seeing.

Now, Lily didn’t have the best impression of Alex. She’d heard through Pia about the way Alex treated James once she found out about Token after the big meeting. While, Lily didn’t like James, Alex wasn’t helping matters with her attitude. James wasn’t the only Cloudmill with social and behavioral issues. So what if James had a plushie he cared for, a lot of teenagers had plushies they cared for, and he wanted to do something positive with it for Jorvik.

But no, she had to pick on him about it.

Alex had her fingers in her pockets. “So, you must be Lily,” she said as she sidled over towards her.

“I’ve seen you around Moorland, Alex Cloudmill, right?” Lily tried to keep her voice polite. She didn’t know what Alex wanted and she shouldn’t be Loretta.

Alex rubbed the back of her neck and chuckled. “There are so many campers, I can’t keep track of all of you.”

“We’re coming and going all the time,” Lily said, sarcasm rolling off of her in waves. Not that she expected Alex to remember her at all. It wasn’t like Alex even bothered to try. Maya had more of an excuse than Alex did. Or maybe it was less of one since she worked with the campers. Lily pushed it away for later. Alex wasn’t a camp counselor.

Alex missed the sarcasm. “Exactly.”

“What brings you out here, other than Linda,” Lily decided to cut to the chase.

“Well,” Alex scuffed her shoe on the ground. “I want you to come meet Elizabeth Sunbeam. I mean, you’ve been doing all this great stuff, and,” she trailed off.

“Being a good leader with a mild side of delegation and organizational skills doesn’t make me a candidate to be a, what is it again?” Lily said.

“Soul Rider,” Alex supplied. “I think Elizabeth could help clear up any misconceptions you have about it.”

“If she’s not going to work with Melissa, who, by the way, is the Club leader at her stables, then why is she going to work with me?” Lily crossed her arms. “I’m, for all intents and purposes, the Baroness’ lady.”

Alex shrugged. “I think you should meet her. She’s a power.”

Lily glanced around. The other girls had edged closer and were blatantly listening in. “What do you girls think?” She asked.

“Go,” Pauline said.

“Get it over with,” Regina nodded. “We’ve got our stable and we don’t want any problems with Melissa though.”

“Nope,” one of the other girls said popping the p.

“All right, I’ll go,” Lily said.

Alex grinned. “I’m sure this is all some miscommunication and a good chat will clear things up.”

Lily strode past her to get to her horse. There was another horse next to hers, golden in color with a blonde mane. “Yours?”

“You should see him out in the wild.”

“Yeah, we haven’t been out far enough for that yet, I guess,” Lily said.

“You do know about it,” Alex blinked.

“It was brought to our attention that the Jorvik Warmblood Sports aren’t like other horses.”

“Well, this Tin Can.”

The horse whinnied.

“Nice to meet you too, Tin Can,” Lily said as she mounted her horse. “Transports okay with you, or would you like to get your hooves dirty?”

“Uh, he’s fine with a transport,” Alex said slowly, brow furrowed.

Lily nodded and urged her horse over to the transport. They rode in silence to Valedale. The transport slowed to a stop.

“I want to thank you for um, looking after my brother, and Justin,” Alex said abruptly. “I know he’s a pain in the ass.”

“James or Justin?” Lily asked.

“James,” Alex said quickly. “Look, I, I appreciate it. I mean, he told me how it was your plan to buy some of the Baroness’ horses for his stable and everything. We want him to succeed.”

“No one really wants anyone to fail. I mean, unless they’re a murderer or a fascist or something,” Lily blinked rapidly. “He’s got good ideas. He has really bad ways about executing said ideas.” She nudged her horse down the ramp.

Alex followed her. “Right.”

“Good people help other people,” Lily said. “So, you’re welcome.”

“And expect the same treatment?”

“Verily,” Lily nodded.

“I don’t know what that means,” Alex said.

Lily looked around. But what grabbed her attention first was the waterfall. It was neon green. It tumbled down the mountain and into the pool below with a great deal of mist and spray. If it was this bad at the head of the river, Lily couldn’t imagine what it was like over the mountain with the Lake that was placid in comparison. (She pondered if the Lake drained down into the river as well through underwater channels. The water had to go somewhere if it was constantly being filled.)

She tore her gaze away from the green water. She didn’t see any of the girls in their celtic uniforms.

Melissa and the others must be at the ruined summer house still. All for the best, she guessed. She stopped by a girl that had to be related to Jenna and Judy. “Morning, I’m Lily with the Silver Drakes Riding Club.”

“I’m Claire, Valedale Stable Master. Melissa’s told me a bit about you.” Claire grinned at her.

“All good I hope?” Lily’s lips twitched.

“Absolutely. Looking forward to Rainbow Week, it sounds like what you girls are putting together is going to be awesome. Going to have to take some days off to enjoy it all.” Claire nodded. “You might set an entirely new standard for holidays.”

“We hope so,” Lily said. “You have a lovely stable.”

“It’s quiet. We like it.”

“Nice meeting you, Claire,” Lily said.

Alex nodded at Claire. “Claire.”

“Alex.”

“She’s this way, cottage right next to the inn,” Alex said.

Lily noted a blonde woman sweeping her stoop wearing a dress with Celtic patterns on it.

“Elizabeth!” Alex called out as they got closer. “I brought someone to meet you.”

Elizabeth Sunbeam set her broom next to the door and brushed down her skirts. “How kind of you, Alex.”

Alex grinned. “Elizabeth, this is Lily. She’s the President of the Silver Drake’s Riding Club at the Manor.”

“Charmed,” Lily said.

Elizabeth peered at her. “Are you, are you really?”

“If I wasn’t, I wouldn’t say so,” Lily said blandly.

“I suppose like Young Melissa you think you know everything.” Elizabeth pushed her hair back over one shoulder.

“I know nothing about the druids or your religion or much about Jorvik. I lead a group of girls that like horses and want to see our stable thrive. Hopefully, if we get to train, we can make it to the Claymore Challenge. However, as my friends and I go about our business in Jorvik, we keep running up against the G.E.D. and a group called Dark Core. These groups we understand are rivals to you. While in most circumstances this would make us allies for the enemy of the enemy is my friend,” Lily trailed off.

Alex stared at her with parted lips.

“The battle between light and darkness,” Elizabeth started.

“Your methods of fighting the darkness leave me questioning how light you actually are. The ends don’t justify the means, Ms. Sunbeam.” Lily shifted in her horse’s saddle. “Dark Core is trying to steal horses from South Hoof Peninsula. The Hightower family won’t listen. G.E.D. has drilled deep into the Greydew Mountains and has completely blocked off Old Hillcrest, yet, no one does anything. Dark Core is situated just up there,” Lily nodded at the mountain side above Valedale. “You can see their camp through a telescope or with a zoom lens. You’re happy to help sick horses. Are you going to help a sick land?”

Elizabeth frowned at her. “I must advise patience.”

“Patience? Lisa Peterson. Anne Von Blissen are missing without a trace. These are your people.” Lily squared her shoulders. “I came here willing to listen and thus far you have neither been welcoming nor said anything I care to hear. I judge you on your inaction. You allow the Silversong River to be tainted on your watch. First the fish near here will die. The plants on the banks will dry up and rot. The dirt will start falling into the stream choking the waters. Then it will spread to the ocean. It’s a ripple and it starts here in your sleepy mountain village.”

Elizabeth straightened. “You play with forces beyond your understanding.”

“And you seriously underestimate how much I don’t care,” Lily said in a tight voice. “Ms. Sunbeam, I don’t know who you work for or who you worship, but here’s my message. Lead. Follow. Or get the hell out of my way. Change is coming on swift wings to South New Jorvik County. So far, none of you have been part of it.”

“You overestimate what I can do.” Elizabeth’s voice turned harsh. “And what you can do, a teenager, and a stranger to Jorvik, her magic, and her ways.”

Lily leaned down. “You were all strangers to Jorvik once.”

Alex shivered.

Lily straightened up and gathered the reins in her hands. “I’m sorry that this didn’t go as you hoped, Alex. With great power comes great responsibility. Do keep an eye on Justin for us.” She nudged her horse with her heel and he turned and flicked his hoofs daintily as he went down the hill.

Lily rode off to the Summer House.

Melissa looked confused to see her coming North from Valedale instead of West from the Manor.

Lily opened up without any preamble. “The Druids have gotten complacent.”

“Wow,” Melissa said. “You met Elizabeth. What did you say?”

“I threw down the gauntlet, quoted Spider-Man, and departed before she could get over her shock at my audacity.” Lily let her gaze rove over the Summer House.

“You should have seen it before,” Melissa joked.

Lily grinned. She sobered. “I wanted to warn you because I’m sure Claire will tell you I showed up.”

“Yes, the famous Lily,” Melissa leaned against her shovel and peered at the fire they had going on what remained of the hearth.

“Infamous more like,” Lily said drolly. “I really don’t know what came over me. Maybe it was seeing the waterfall and the camp right there. How can she live with that every day and claim to be a druid?”

“I don’t think she’s a druid in the way that we think of druids,” one of Melissa’s girls said. “She worships this Aideen woman, rather than nature.”

“The problems with language being imprecise and terrible for nailing down ideas,” Lily shook her head.

“Well, I’m properly terrified,” one of the other girls said.

“Oh you,” Melissa snickered.

“See that you are,” Lily teased. This was going much better than meeting Elizabeth.

“Now that you’ve seen it, any ideas?” Melissa asked.

“Everything we’ve done before has been through proper channels making sure they had permits and all.” Lily shook her head.

“You know, those are probably supposed to be posted,” one of the girls said.

“There’s a Ranger station in Firgrove. Ingrid told me about it,” Melissa examined her nails. “It’s small.”

“Rangers take their duty of care to the pristine land of Jorvik seriously,” Lily said and almost managed a straight face. She sobered. “Just be careful.”

“We should have reconned better the first time,” Melissa fretted. “This could be over already.”

“You don’t have my club’s flair for skullduggery,” Lily wiggled her eyebrows.

“Next meeting, tips for skullduggery,” Melissa said solemnly.

They all burst into giggles.

Lily’s phone buzzed. She frowned. “It’s Sonja. What in the world?” She picked it up and put it in her ear. “Lily, champion of horses, at your service.”

“You’re in a mood already,” Sonja said. “I need your help. Luciana is having a run in with someone who I’m sure has lovely intentions and, I think she’s one of those druids.”

“I’m on my way,” Lily said and hung up. “Code red at Dundull,” she explained. Sensing her urgency, her horse spun on a dime and galloped back towards Valedale. She slowed him down long enough to enter the transport without running into anything, shouting “Dundull, ASAP,” at the driver.

The driver gave her a thumbs up and they were off.

Lily wondered what was going on the entire way. Last she had heard, G.E.D. had tried to bottle and sell the water of the spring at Dundull and in order to save the town or at least the lake water, Rania’s mother had become Mayor.

The trailer parked and Lily shouted her thanks as she got out. She texted Sonja about where they were.

“Stable,” the text read. “Turn right.”

So, Lily went right and found herself in a large stable yard. Rania and Luciana were squared off against a woman in a green vest over a green shirt and actual brown leather breaches.

Emma looked close to tears.

Horses stood in a circle around them. A big palomino draft horse with a strange blaze in the shape of a lightning bolt. Lily wasn’t sure of the breed.

“Harry Potter, much,” Lily muttered. Then she grinned. Her name was the name of the main character’s mother after all. “No relation,” she added under her breath.

Then there was Dellinger, Rania’s Commenara who was trained to help her with her blindness. Sirio, the black Lusitano that was Luciana’s main ride. Sonja’s white on white Jorvik Warmblood Sport. And lastly, a muddy colored palimino horse that looked to also have the lines of a Jorvik Starter Pony.

“Muddy is Emma’s horse,” Luciana said. “You can’t just take him away when she’s bought him fair and square from Kirsty.”

“They even had the proper bonding ceremony,” Rania added. “It was very beautiful. I cried.”

“I’m sorry girls,” Rhiannon said. “Muddy is a Starbreed.”

“You can’t take Starbreeds from people they’ve bonded to,” Rania argued. “I’ve lived here all my life and I know that much!

Sonja trotted over. “They’ve been going around in circles like this for close to twenty minutes.”

Lily rode over. “Excuse me,” she said.

“Lily,” Emma said and ran over. “You have to make this woman listen. I love Muddy. I bought him fair and square with my earnings. We’ve bonded. Muddy is my horse.”

“You have papers?”

Emma nodded.

“I’m not asking you to give me, Muddy. I’m asking you to sell him to the druids.” The woman said. “He’s a special horse.”

“I don’t want to sell,” Emma said. “I just got him.” She flung her arms around the horse’s neck. “I’m not going to give you up, Muddy.”

“Not gonna let you down,” Sonja sang. “Not gonna run around and desert you.”

Lily glared at her.

“Sorry,” Sonja muttered.

“I didn’t come out here to be rick-rolled,” Lily hissed. “Look, Ms.,” she paused.

“Rhiannon,” the woman said.

“Rhiannon,” Lily repeated to put the name firmly in her mind. “If Emma has papers, the law is clear. The horse is hers. If she doesn’t want to sell Muddy, she doesn’t have to sell Muddy. Repeatedly asking when the answer doesn’t change is not only the definition of insanity. It’s harassment.”

“I’m afraid that Emma won’t be able to take care of Muddy properly. Muddy’s a Starbreed.”

“He’s a Jorvik Starter Pony,” Emma defended with her face in Muddy’s neck. “And his name is Mudskipper.”

“By what authority are you saying that he’s a Starbreed?”

“I’m a druid,” Rhiannon said.

Lily wanted to scream. Oh, she was not getting on a good start with these druids. “I’m sure druids understand property laws. I know the G.E.D. and Dark Core don’t seem to but surely an upstanding, are you even an organization, like the druids would,” Lily sighed. “What am I saying? I sound crazy. Fine. What is a Starbreed?”

“I can’t tell you that,” Rhiannon said. “You aren’t a druid. They’re special.”

Lily’s temper broke and sarcasm filled her voice. “And you used your mystic powers to determine this and now you want Emma to sell her special friend.”

“Essentially,” Rhiannon tried for a smile.

“Mudskipper,” Lily addressed the horse directly. “Are you happy with Emma? Is she your special rider?”

The horse nodded.

“There, it’s settled. The horse wants to stay with Emma.”

Rhiannon’s brow furrowed. “Can you talk to horses?”

“We can all talk to horses.”

“I mean, can you understand them when they talk back? Are you a druid?” Rhiannon asked.

“You couldn’t pay me at the moment to be a druid,” Lily’s voice turned icy. “I’m dedicated to getting things done in a prompt, efficient, and timely manner.”

Sonja ducked her head and smirked.

“Motivation that the druids seem to be lacking,” Lily finished.

Rhiannon’s eyes unfocussed. “Your horse is also a Starbreed.”

“And you’ll get my horse over my cold dead body,” Lily snapped. “You can’t just look at horses, wave your hands, and expect people to turn them over.”

Rhiannon shook her head and her eyes focused. “You aren’t from around here.”

“What gave it away? My accent or my attitude.”

“The druids,” Rhiannon began.

“Sorry. I already got into this with Elizabeth Sunbeam not thirty minutes ago.” Lily held up a hand. “People have more to fear from G.E.D. and Dark Core than they have to fear from you, and G.E.D. is barely competent at what they do.”

Rhiannon sucked her cheeks in. She nodded at them. “I’ll leave you to think it over.”

“There’s nothing to think over,” Emma wailed.

Rhiannon mounted her horse and took off.

They all watched her go, the other stable girls drifting from where they’d been watching.

“She’s off to chat with Elizabeth over how rude and disrespectful I am, I’m sure.” Lily said. “So, anyone have any idea what a Starbreed is?”

“The druids claim all the horses they ride are Starbreeds,” Sonja said. “They sweep in at foaling time, check out all the foals and come back for the ones they claim are Starbreeds when they’re weaned. No one is quite sure where they take them or what they do with them.”

“Are there enough druids to justify taking all these horses?” Lily asked. “I mean, that’s rather suspicious. And how did my horse get missed then?”

“The Baroness banned them from her paddocks. They might have missed Muddy by accident,” Sonja shrugged a shoulder.

“Good on the Baroness,” Lily murmured. She picked out her phone and texted all the other presidents that there were special horses called Starbreeds that could be found among the horses and if anyone knew anything about them, they should share.

Kelsey texted back that it sounded suspicious. What if Dark Core wanted a Starbreed horse?

It made sense to Lily. If the Starbreed horses were the horses of the druids and these dark riders were the druid’s opposites, then of course, they’d want a Starbreed horse for whatever they were doing. She didn’t and couldn’t text all of that to Kelsey. Linda hadn’t texted her druid business for a reason. Maybe Dark Core or G.E.D. was more tech savvy than they appeared. So, she texted back a confirmation. Though if only the druids like Rhiannon knew how to figure out which was which, she didn’t know how that would help Kelsey.

Or Dark Core.

If Dark Core couldn’t tell. They’d get a lot of horses before getting the one they wanted. Not that Lily wanted them to get their hands on any horses. She sighed. “I think I’ve done enough damage for today.”

“No. No. No. Don’t say that. Watching you stand up to that woman was empowering,” Sonja said.

Lily smiled tightly at her. “Last straw, I guess. I’ll see you guys before Rainbow Week I hope.”

--

She used the transport to get to the Manor. Tracking down Linda, she interrupted Alex rhapsodizing about her stand against Elizabeth.

Linda cleared her throat. “Lily.”

“Oh, I was going to tell you all about it,” Lily flushed. “I don’t want you feel forced to choose sides or anything.”

“No. No forcing here,” Linda reassured her.

“Yeah. It was excellent.” Alex said. “Like, I’ve been pushing for action ever since Lisa and Anne went missing!”

“Well, Rhiannon, another druid, I guess,” Lily explained the situation with Emma and Mudskipper. “Do you two know what a Starbreed is, and can you tell me?”

“Only in the way it related to Starshine,” Linda said. “His mane turns electric blue out in the wild. Herman thought it made him special, a Starbreed. I suppose by being our horses, they have to be Starbreeds. Though, Herman always said that Starshine, Meteor, Tin-Can, and Concorde were reincarnated versions of the original Starbreeds. Not that they remember their lives before, but that our souls have been together a long time.”

“You’re reincarnated too.”

“I guess?” Linda shrugged.

Alex sighed. “They really don’t like to explain unless you’re high up in the inner circles. We’ve only been at this a year.”

Linda gave Alex a chiding look.

“Not that we’re supposed to talk about it.” Alex waved her hands.

“All right, if you can’t, you can’t.” Lily said. “Be warned though. We can’t guard against people we don’t know about.” She left them there to get back to work. She’d been gone long enough.

She hoped those words wouldn’t come back to haunt her.

FOR THE ACCOMPANYING IMAGES PLEASE DO NOT REMOVE MY WATERMARK AND CONTACT INFORMATION. THANK YOU. I get it. Some of you might get excited and want to see this stuff in the game, especially the clothes, tack, and pets. However, the only way I want to see this in the game is if I get paid for it. If I see it in the game and I’m not paid for it, there will be hell to pay. You think I’m salty. I’d be angry. Personally, I’m not going to send this info to SSO. If you do, leave my contact information there! Don’t give them any excuses to steal.

Now, I’ll know you haven’t read this note if you leave me comments about how ‘salty’ I am about the game and if I hate it so much I should do something else. I am doing something else. It’s called Mystic Riders MMORPG Project. Mystic Riders however is a very baby phase game. You can check out our plans on the game dev blog. (Skills, Factions, Professions, Crafting, Mini-Games, 25+ horse breeds!) If you know anyone who would be interested and has money or contacts about game making, direct them to the blog.

#star stable #sso #star stable online #fan fic #jorvik reimagined #star stable salt #silveerglade reimagined #completely harmless #many nods to ruth westside #the druids didn't make a great impression #also conflict means plot #i blame the update schedule #though the story doesn't help

[pepperoniwhirlwind]

~Honesty Hour~

     I was asked by @lovelynhiddenkittens to do all 150 questions in the Honesty Hour tag! 😮 Thank you, lovely and curious stranger~! 😆 But since that’s a lot for one post, I’ll break it up into chunks of 50 questions so it’s easier for all my blogging buddies to digest. 😊 Starting... now! 😝

1. Who was the last person you held hands with?      That would have to be Alex. He was warming my hand for me because it was ice cold. Though he doesn’t know that’s because I intentionally held my super cold drink for a really long time with that hand, then casually mentioned how cold my hand was so he’d try to warm it... >//> Introverts are sneaky flirts, what can I say? 😆😏

2. Are you outgoing or shy?      Shy, definitely. Though there are alters in the system much more outgoing than me.

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing?      Tyler! 😄 I’ve been staying over at her apartment every weekend this past summer, and always enjoy our movie and gaming marathons. 😝

4. Are you easy to get along with?      I think so. I’m not very easily angered, a pacifist at heart, and a people-pleaser at my core. 😂 So it’s pretty hard not to get along with me.

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you?

     I don’t know, Alex is a sweetheart so he’d probably help, and Tyler cares but she doesn’t do bodily fluids. 😆 So, it depends. And considering I’ve never been drunk, and seem to have too high a tolerance to get drunk without having to rob a bank to fund the sheer volume of alcohol needed, I doubt this problem will ever arise. 👌

6. What kind of people are you attracted to?

     Kind and funny people. 😊

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now?

     I have no idea, but I won’t rule it out. Alex has kinda been cute and flirty towards me lately, so maaaybe~? >//>

8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind?

     Uh, well, the subject of the last question was Alex, so, him. 😆

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?

     A wee bit, yes. 😅 I put up a good facade though, but being asexual, sex is kinda... bleeehhh~ for me. e~e

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?

     That would have to be Tyler. :3 She’s my bestie from my ASL classes~ 💜 We have a looot in common, so we talk for hours at a time, in between movie and game marathons that is. 😆

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say?

     Context: I was spamming Tyler gifs of adorable animals earlier today.

     The Text: “Aaand now I gotta get ready for therapy, so this shall be the crowning gif of adorable goodness!”

     Followed by a gif of two golden retrievers fighting over a tennis ball, with a third retriever (being shoved into the frame by a fourth, offscreen, retriever) resting his head on the two dogs feuding over the aforementioned tennis ball. 💖

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?

     This is rather hard... so I’ll just list the songs that I listen to on repeat a lot.

     1. “The Cure” by Lady Gaga

     2. “Insomnia” by IAMX

     3. “Middle of the Bed” by Lucy Rose

     4. “All the Rage” by Allie X

     5. “Wires” by The Neighbourhood

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair?

     Yes. No. Kinda? It depends... If I’ve just had a shower and my hair is clean, I love it. ^w^ But if it’s been a bit and my hair isn’t all that clean I just feel embarrassed if people touch my hair. e~e

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles?

     Ehhh... Depends which alter you ask really. Me, personally? Not so much. My family has always told me our family line is cursed to have bad luck, so if I believed in such things, I guess I’m doomed. 😂

15. What good thing happened this summer?

     I’ve started working on myself and my social life, strengthening friendships irl and online, or, at least attempting to. 😅 Sometimes I’m just bad at not isolating. But this past summer I’ve been spending basically every weekend at my friend Tyler’s apartment and hanging out with her core group of friends. It’s been a nice break from the chaos of the school semester. 😊

16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

     Well, considering she’s on the other side of the country back in my home state, probably not. She was a lovely first kiss, but I’ll leave it at that. 🤭

17. Do you think there is life on other planets?

     With how many planets there are in the galaxy; the universe? Not to mention how many planets within The Goldilocks Zone that share a similar atmosphere to earth within the observable universe alone... How could I not think other life exists? At the very least, in some kind of bacterial form, though, I dare to dream a little bigger. ✨

18. Do you still talk to your first crush?

     Well, I’ve never really had a crush, per se, though plenty of squishes. :3 But my first squish did not turn out well, so, no. :c

19. Do you like bubble baths?

     Yes, especially if I go all out and light candles and play music on my phone. 🕯️🎶😌 However, I don’t do that very often. I take showers mostly.

20. Do you like your neighbors?

     Yeah, they’re chill people. The neighbors with the overly-territorial pitbull that kept us prisoner in our car for hours and broke into our fenced-in backyard to take massive doggie dumps out of sheer hatred for us moved away because their dog kept terrorizing the neighbourhood and was going to get put down if it didn’t stop breaking out to chase children on trikes and joggers onto rooftops. So, the neighbors we have now are awesome! 😆

21. What are your bad habits?

     Sometimes I’m too honest and don’t know when to stop talking, other times I’m so socially anxious I might as well be a feature of the wall at parties. 😂 I also have trichotillomania, a compulsive disorder related to OCD, in which I get really strong urges to pull out my hair sometimes, so definitely a bad habit... Just talking about it kinda... ehhhh... moving on. e~e

22. Where would you like to travel?

     A lot of places. Though Scotland is at the top of my list. Scotland is a huge part of my family’s heritage, and some of my family still lives there. So I would love to visit and spend some time in nature there~  💕

23. Do you have trust issues?

     Yes.

24. Favorite part of your daily routine?

     Well, anytime I get to de-stress is nice. I know wiping down my face with a face wipe always feels nice and refreshing after a day out running errands and attending classes. It’s the little things that are the most help~ 😊

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with?

     All of it. If I could edit my body, that would be nice.

26. What do you do when you wake up?

     Hit snooze on the alarm a couple times, get up, walk to the bathroom... you can imagine the rest.

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker?

     Nope, I’m quite happy with my vampire pale skin, and even my dirty blonde, curly lion’s mane of hair, and my blue eyes ain’t so bad either. I’m not completely hideous, just 97% hideous. 👌😂

28. Who are you most comfortable around?

     Myself. My alters. Tyler. Alex. My Tumblr fam~ 💞

29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up?

     No, because I usually cut them out of my life after they break my heart. Some have tried to stay friends with me or become friends with me again years later, but... no. I don’t need backstabbers in my life.

30. Do you ever want to get married?

     Maybe, someday. When the time is right, I’ll know, until then, I’ll enjoy my singledom~ :3

31. Is your hair long enough for a ponytail?

     Yes, it’s in a ponytail right now actually. 😆

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?

     NONE.

33. Spell your name with your chin.

     gtlo nhy (Oh gawd... What a name. 😂)

34. Do you play sports? What sports?

     Mi-Suk used to play on tennis and basketball teams, but our spine is a little too deteriorated nowadays to attempt such things.

35. Would you rather live without TV or music?

     Without TV, hands down. I’d die without music. I bleed music.

36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them?

     Yep. I had a bit of a squish on this kid named Travis in elementary school and never told him. My frenemy told him I had a crush on him, and he never talked to me after that. 😭

37. What do you say during awkward silences?

     I either make a joke or just enjoy the silence. Depends what mood I’m in. Sometimes I’m more introverted and just want to sit in silence or listen to music instead of talk. Other times I just wanna connect with people and I tend to crack a lot of darker, self-deprecating jokes as a way to break the ice, or tension if I feel some.

38. Describe your dream girl/guy?

     I want someone who is genuinely kind, patient, and funny. It also helps if they are neurodivergent like me, and have similar enough interests, sense of humor, etc. to my own. c: Overall, I just want to feel comfortable and safe with someone. 😊

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in?

     I buy food at Fry’s... so... Fry’s?

40. What do you want to do after high school?

     I’m already out of high school, bub. Now I’m in college, and I still have no idea. I have dream jobs, dream homes, dream lives. But none of them seem realistic.

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?

     Depends on the crime, really. If I hired someone to babysit my hypothetical children, and they forgot to tell the children to clean up their toys, I believe a second chance is in order. If they, however, ditched the job to mack on Paul Puffy Lips next door, leaving my children to starve, I don’t believe I’ll be giving them another call.

42. If you’re being extremely quiet what does it mean?

     It means I’m probably really socially anxious at the moment and would prefer to not be made the center of attention. o~o’

43. Do you smile at strangers?

     Yes, sometimes to spread cheer and joy, other times because I’m worried they’ll think I’m an up-to-no-good deviant or zombified by depression, which is how I feel at least 80% of the time, and worry everyone notices, even strangers, who probably would not assume such things, but that’s social anxiety for you. 😂

44. A trip to outer space or the bottom of the ocean?

     Why not both? However, humans are so preoccupied with space that we’ve only explored 5% of our oceans. I don’t want the oceans to feel lonely, so I’ll visit them first. 💙

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning?

     Sometimes the looming responsibilities in my life, other times I just don’t get out of bed. 

46. What are you paranoid about?

     A lot of things, but the most pressing concern of mine is that everyone will inevitably leave me because I’m a terrible, horrible human being who doesn’t deserve friendship. 😅

47. Have you ever been high?

     Every day, if I can help it. I have a medical marijuana card and have for a couple years now.

48. Have you ever been drunk?

     No.

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?

     No, not really. Nothing is coming to mind. 

50. What was the color of the last hoodie you wore?

     Well, I’m wearing a hoodie now, and it’s gray, with the Nirvana emblem on the front. 😝 It’s my favorite and coziest hoodie of all.

#honesty hour #asks #tony