#2 hours to escape this shithole i'll take it | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

republic-korlan · 10 months

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20 Miles from Fort Tataromoa

"What's that?"

"I hear something..."

"Where is it coming from?"

20 minutes later

"It's getting a bit dark, but I think I see something..."

"Taone Nui..."

"I'm home..."

"I need to find someplace where I can make a call."

"Maybe there is someone still loyal to me here..."

"I certainly hope so."

"Maybe Aata is still around."

"I'll head to his office."

2 hours later

"This place is a shithole..."

"I guess Storinka's guys got to him..."

"Maybe I can still find a phone."

"Oh fuck..."

"They just... left the bodies here..."

"They're unrecognizable."

"They didn't even give them a proper cremation."

"They just left the bodies."

"Atuae, I hope there are no Ngaro around..."

"Oh, finally, a phone."

"Hopefully Oliver uses the same number..."

Ringing

"Hello, this is Oliver Cronkite..."

"OLIVER, HELLO THIS IS NGAT-"

"Sorry, I cannot reach the phone right now, leave a message after the beep."

"Fuck."

Beep

"Oliver, hello."

"This is Kauri, I know you're probably confused."

"You might've thought I was dead."

"But I just escaped Fort Tataromoa."

"It was just attacked, Korlan is at its most vulnerable right now, and you need to contact someone."

"I need you to call Lucerne, call the Continental Concord, call the Tokarokan Alliance, call the UKC."

"I need you to tell them this is the time to strike Korlan."

"This is when you need to join in and fight Korlan."

"You need to join the war, fight against the Allied Effective."

"You need to put a stop to them."

"They're powerful, they really do have a chance at winning."

"You have a change here, Oliver."

"To be the good guy."

"To put an end to a global conflict."

"To end a genocide."

"You need to join this war."

"You need to help me take my country back."

"Please."

#korlan #ailou #fort tataromoa #kauri ngata #haravenia #oliver cronkite #ulina #allied effective #zapita

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coffee-bat · 3 years

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oh, oh geez-

i should have stated it more clearly, oh god- i mentioned in the tags of a post i made earlier today that i managed to get back home-

thank you so much. all of what you said is REALLY good advice, and pretty much what was going on in my head when i was there-

(i ended up writing a LONG vent about the hospital, so i'm gonna put a read more here, sorry)

[[MORE]]

i spent a bit over 24 hours there (thankfully only that long). the first few hours, i was panicked- i could barely breathe and the smoke stang my eyes, i had a migraine and no water to swallow painkillers, on top of that i was on period and with no easy bathroom access (it was in the "actual" psych ward down the corridor, meaning i had to be let out of my current room (which was locked at all times), led to the ward entrance (locked too), let in, let to go to the bathroom, and then repeat the same procedure to go back, which sucked)- i was close to attempting escape. like at some point i almost fully decided that the moment someone opens the door to check in on us, i'm fucking running. the only thing that stopped me was that if they ended up catching me, i'd be labeled a nutcase and given even less opportunity to escape. that, and it was below zero degrees outside, i don't know where i'd wait for mom to pick me up. so i decided to wait. stay by the door, where there was a small gap under it, so there was a bit of fresh air, and wait.

i was taken there involuntarily- mom and i had an argument that, as usual, triggered an episode for me, and i ended up cutting both my inner arms (usually i only do the left one, and avoid the inner side). mom decided that she's calling the ambulance on me (two days prior i received an asylum referral that was supposed to be up to my decision), which just left me a bit of time to pack my stuff. the ambulance came, the paramedics were angry that they were called despite me "having barely scratched myself" (thanks, i'll try harder next time), but ended up taking me. i was supposed to go to a respectable asylum in the city (which i currently live 30km away from, but it's the capital of the voivodeship), but it turned out to be closed due to having a covid case, so i was taken to a shithole hospital in a town closer to my house. terrible idea. it was a normal hospital with a psych ward in it, instead of full-on mental hospital, which y'know, tends to go with how they're treating you. so i was put there, without my consent, locked into a small room with two grown men and an older woman, all of them smoking.

the roommates were really anxiety-inducing, honestly. like to the point where i was scared to fall asleep (ending up putting my phone and wallet under my pillow every time). the men were both drunks, and the woman seemed to be too. on top of that, the woman was an ACTUAL nutcase. no idea what was up with her, honestly, but it was nerve-wracking. she didn't know what town she was in, didn't know why she was here, seemed to have some point of memory loss, as she asked me for cigs multiple times, and was suprised when i responded that i don't smoke literally everytime, would talk to herself constantly, at some point started yelling "MOOOM. MAMAA!" out of nowhere- she wasn't aggressive or anything, but it's honestly really scary to be locked with someone you don't understand nor can predict. i felt sorry for her. the men spoke mostly in swear words (the famous "kurwa"s), stared at me weirdly, mostly walked around and smoked. no nurse would listen to me when i tried to explain that 1) i'm scared 2) i can't fucking breathe, why the fuck is noone doing anything about them smoking indoors.

i was shortly talked with by doctors a total of two times- the first one was on the day i was put there, she interviewed me shortly and proceeded to give me sedatives because i was shaking and stress-stimming. in consequence i passed out and slept for three hours, then was really unsure on my feet for the rest of the day. noone listened when i tried to mention that i seem to have reacted badly to the meds. which is to be expected, but y'know. sucks when you have to constantly hold onto something when walking/standing and everyone is pretending it's fine, because they just don't care.

i did my best to keep a calm demeanor through all the time i was there, so i would have bigger chances of being let out- and apparently succeeded, as in the "doctor's description" in the document they gave me upon leaving, i was described as "calm, level-headed and aware". which is nice, as they kept questioning me to check if i'm a nutcase or not ("what year is it? do you know where you are? why are you here? what's your name?"), which was real fucking annoying. i also kept insisting in all the minor check-ins that i should be let out. in my second doctor visit, in the morning of my second day there, i was finally asked "if i think staying would be beneficial for me", and i said fuck no (in the calmest and most level-headed way possible). they asked me a few more times, and when my response didn't change over the course of a few hours, they finally agreed to discharge me, and i called mom to pick me up.

mom was the one who put me there, but when i vented to her about the conditions, she agreed that i have to do anything to be discharged, and she'll pick me up. dad knew too, but he doesn't have a car, so he couldn't really do anything. that, and i'm legally an adult (even if they didn't treat me as such), so i can't really depend on my parents in situations like this. so i was kinda alone in the struggle.

the physical conditions were obviously horrible. it was cold (snowing outside), the room was dirty, i had no privacy or way to hide from the men, so i ended up just not changing. the only food i was given was dry bread with green-ish ham and a small apple (supper) and dry bread with cheese that smelled highly suspicious and a one (1) inch wide piece of bell pepper. so i ended up eating dry bread and the fruit/vegetables. they gave us plastic cups, and there was a sink, so at least i had a way to drink. the water left sediment in my mouth, but it was still something.

the bathroom situation was fucking ridiculous. on top of having to be let out to go there, there was obviously no toilet paper, cause what did i expect. when i was woken up in the morning to go to the other doctor, i practically begged to be allowed to go to the bathroom first. they denied, so i asserted my dominance by bleeding on the therapist chair (and ruining a pair of pants).

so yeah, tl;dr: mental hospitals suck, especially when they're in underfounded shitholes.

(bonus: pictures of my room to illustrate my points: )

#sorry for the long rant/vent #but the moment i tried to form a comprehensive sentence about the hospital it just came pouring out y'know?#long post #ask #personal #vent #mental hospital tw #asylum tw #abuse tw #(i guess)#period ment tw #self harm mention #blood mention #mental illness mention #there are probably a lot more tws i should put here but i don't know what #my pics

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