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#5 pringles
shiftythrifting · 1 year
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pringles can. $4.99
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laniidae-passerine · 1 month
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the problem with Avenue 5 is that HBO was absolutely looking at the wrong demographic as the potential audience. bet you money they cancelled it because the 40-50 year old demographic wasn’t reacting to it like they did to Veep but that’s because Avenue 5 isn’t for them. it’s for the 18-30 year old demographic. because who else will see Hugh Laurie being the biggest lamest bisexual polyamorous weirdo fail guy in space and immediately want to see a billion episodes of him just eating metaphorical asphalt??? nobody. bring that loser and his crew of freaks and his insane wife and husband back to us!
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spooky-activity · 1 year
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Going insane over this Makoann fic because I’m gay with big feelings sometimes
+bonus I always forget how awful it is to be Makoto in the first bit of the game. Girl can’t catch a break. EVERYONE be bullying her
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coffeecakecafe · 2 years
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Yancy and his tiny child Esta and his giant dog Blink
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savleye · 6 months
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ive never played legal legends ever in my life but i will admit that i am not immune to catchy music or cute guys. iwishihad6holes. omg who said that
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shapoopy178 · 5 months
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Late to the party, pretty sure Spotify called me gay again
Pretty sure that makes 3 consecutive years with Against Me!, Halsey, and Polyphia in top 5 spots. It was a big year for FLETCHER and I've been on a Kim Petras kick since I saw her at Gov Ball this summer. Other honorable mentions in tags.
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trying to organise bday shenanigans but it's just a mortal reminder I'm getting old and I want to not
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peapod20001 · 7 months
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I have never once played a game of monopoly, but we have had the game for years
I always liked the thimble piece cus it could fit on my fingers
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clareguilty · 10 months
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Gummy bears, a cup of chocolate chips, and boba tea is not even a meal together, never mind separately!! You best be careful or I'll be making house calls with dinner😠
I just woke up and breakfast was 3 pringles
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toiletsquid101 · 1 year
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wolf on a shrek marathon: *vibin*
dad: *walks in* ITS 3 AM WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
me: *was eating Pringles with a furry mask on*..watching shrek.
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gingerninja8 · 2 years
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Sick of opening a pack of something to find less than a quarter of the packet containing food....
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iced-souls · 1 year
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I forgor to make a christlr pfp at the beginning of the month so I made it now—
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tainted-liquor · 7 months
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'Tiny hands; Little Baby ...ପ(๑•ᴗ•๑)ଓ ♡ ft. 42Miles
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...‧₊˚❀༉‧₊˚.
✩ingredients: Sugar, kisses, and baby powder!
˙⟡TWs: Cussing, Miles speaks mostly Spanish, so ready ur spanishDict
✩A/N: Miles is soft when it comes to his children. Its not ooc, he was based off of MY sisters father. parents usually 'calm down' after having babies. pls don't start complaining
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When you think of the ideal father, you usually would think of two types of people. The happy-go-lucky super kind and outgoing person, or someone who balances both fun and order. You never in your life expected to be a mother, or even wanted kids as a matter of fact. But everything changed when you met him. Miles.
Admittedly, when you met in high school shit was rocky. Typical 'anti-social social' kid. Everybody knew him, but nobody was ever able to say they talked to him. But things slowly began to change as the school year passed, and you seemed to pop up more and more in each other's lives. Art projects, a shared interest in graffiti, seating charts in chem, and ending up at the same bodega during the wee hours of the night.
You waltzed into the small store, grabbing a tube of Pringles and a bottle of cherry Faygo. You had a project to get done within the next 5 hours and spent 3 days working nonstop so you wouldn't fail this semester. Your eyes were low and sleepy, your movement was slower than average and it looked like you had been crying. A lot. What is a girl supposed to do when she feels like her life is being drowned out by constant numbers and big words?
You waited by the counter, tapping away on your phone as you waited for the man behind the glass to finish making your chop cheese, slowly raising your head to see who just swung open the door. You made eye contact with Miles for a brief moment, nodding upward as a form of greeting before suddenly being startled. Miles's eyes widened for a moment, taking a tiny step back as he took in how sleepy you looked. Your hoodie wasn't even on properly, one arm completely off your shoulder and exposing a fraction of your black tank top to the world around you. "Well damn, nigga. I know I look like shit but don't make it obvious" you snorted, rolling your eyes as you dropped your head back to your phone screen.
"Oh, my bad. Just not used to seeing you outside of school" he shrugged, making his way to the counter to order his food and standing next to you in silence. You both tapped away on your phones, scrolling through your Instagram while you waited for your sandwich. There was nothing else to it, really. You both waved bye to each other as you left the store, silently building a smidge of a relationship compared to being just strangers. For the most part, it was like that at school too.
There was no real reason to talk to him, outside of a small hallway talk and a nod or a wave. And it stayed like that for a long time, until a random day in the school's library. Miles came strutting through the oak wood doors, seemingly pissed off as he slammed his supplies on a nearby table and started working silently. You side-eyed him, continuing to blast the music in your headphones until you felt a presence begin getting closer to you. You grabbed one of your AirPods, removing it from your ear as Miles stood over you.
"Hmm?" You hummed, looking up at him as you paused your music. He said nothing, only showing you a piece of paper with honors calculus work. "Do you need help?" you asked, scanning over the paper briefly before putting your AirPods in your case. He nodded, letting you take the paper from him as he leaned against the table. "Aight, sit down. I'm only doing one problem though" you muttered, scooting your chair over to make room for Miles.
When Miles left that table, you were closer than normal. You spent the rest of the afternoon helping him 'study' (talking to each other while he finished his work) and exchanging numbers and Instagram. "Good luck with your test!" You smiled, waving from across the room as he left the library. He gave you a nod before swiftly exiting, leaving people asking you left and right "What's Miles like?" You didn't think anything of it, at all.
You never would have imagined that that same boy would be the father of your child almost ten years later.
“MILES!” You shouted as loud as humanly possible. “SÍ? QUÉ HICE??” He shouted back from the kitchen. “MY FUCKING WATER BROKE START THE CAR!” You yelled as you stared down in absolute shock. And it was absolute chaos from there. Miles was practically stumbling out of the house as he ran to start the car, muttering curses as he ran up to get you out of your shared room.
Unfortunately for Miles, he had no idea what was happening. He was terrified but tried to be as supportive as possible through the entire situation. He was out cold for most of the delivery, having fainted 10 minutes in from anxiety. "Sir? SIR-!"
BOOM
But other than that, everything went amazing! He cried for 20 whole minutes when he got to hold his beautiful baby girl. "W-what...sniffle... are you going to...sob...name h-her, love?" he asked between a puddle of tears. You took a good look at your baby through soaked eyes, realizing she was born...quiet. She had one green eye, and one dark brown eye that was taken right from her father's face, a cute little button nose, and a head full of placenta-permed hair. She cried once the entire birth and remained silent the rest of the way, just like her nonchalant-ass daddy. "I'm thinkin' about...Asomi" you replied before bursting out in tears, causing Miles to burst even further into tears.
You attempted to reach for your baby, earning a watery glare from your boyfriend. "Nigga I JUST PUSHED HER OUT! GIMME MY BABY!" you giggled as you attempted to grab your daughter. "nuh-uh. I'm not done holding her" he retorted, flashing you a middle finger as he held Asomi even closer. "Miles Gonzalo Morales."
"Lo siento. Te amo mucho. Tú eres muy bonita y inteligente" he quickly replied as he handed your daughter over.
And from that moment forward, everything in Miles's life revolved around his beautiful family. He spent hours rambling on and on to 'Omi', as he calls her, about anything under the sun. "Entonces," Miles began as he attempted to give 'Omi a sink bath. "Tú mami me dijo que necesito hablar más inglés a ti. I won't though, cuz you're my lil princess" he whispered as he curved Omi's hair into a bubbly mohawk and giggled like a child. He played with the bubbly water, pretending to be one of the countless tiny rubber duckies she had floating around in the water.
"Alright, c'mon. Necesito vestir tú antes consigue frío" he giggled as he put the kid in a prowler onesie you told him not to buy. He blew raspberries on Asomi's little belly, earning adorable giggles from his daughter as he carried the tiny baby with one arm. He cleaned up some of the toys on the floor, briefly pushing them inside the toy bin before grabbing the tiny purple pacifier and soft wooly lamb-lamb plush. Omi clung to his shirt, laying her head on his shoulder as she held the tiny lamb-lamb plushie. Miles kissed her on the forehead, sat down on the couch, and fell asleep with Omi dozing off right beside him.
You came home to two of your two favorite people in the world snuggled up on the couch. Omi's tiny hand gripped Miles's shirt as Miles held her like an inmate protecting his tray. You giggled to yourself, snapping a quick pic for the memories before joining their 'nap circle'.
"G'night, pretty babies" you whispered, pressing kisses on both of their cheeks.
"Mmh...noches."
...‧₊˚❀༉‧₊˚.
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Taglist:
@ashsostrange @chessbox @janaeby @faeriesoiree333 @fivestardior @an1bara @bachirasegoist @kxllanxtdoor
Taglist form on my profile !! pls fill that out to be added <3
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wellabridgemeprincess · 11 months
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youtube
If you haven't yet, please check out the YouTube version of Well Abridge Me Princess! It's all 5 episodes I posted to Tumblr, PLUS a brand new episode AND a brand new theme song!
Made by the cast and crew of Real-Time Fandub
ft. Nowacking from Tear Four Star, Kyle Carrozza from Mighty Magiswords, and NotEasyBeinWheezy from that TikTok where she put Pringles cans on her arms and screamed
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Y’all I’m cleaning out my junk because my dungeon got really fucking messy, I’m gonna be selling my old stuff at cheap prices, so if you have an apprentice that needs some equipment you can find some here
(Most of the stuff is untouched, I kinda bought it and forgor lmao)
I got:
Brooms(flying)~30 gold
Brooms(auto cleans your house for you)~30 silver, I don’t use them anyway
A shit ton of sceptres~15-20 gold each
Old wands~5 gold each
magical (gold)jewellery~50 gold each
Magical (silver)jewellery ~20 gold each
Wizard robes(didn’t wear them, I wanted to make copies of myself but scratched the idea)
Spell books beginnerlvl ~70 copper
Spell books intermediarylvl ~25 silver
Spell books advancedlvl ~50 gold
Magic rings(enhance magic power/stats/etc) ~20-40 gold
Magic swords(I killed a knight legion, they had OP shit but had no idea how to use it) ~60 gold
Enhanced magic knight armour~80 gold per set, I don’t sell pieces individually
Scrying glasses/black orbs ~90 copper each, I don’t scry often
Time seal scrolls(you throw it at stuff and it makes a barrier around it, stopping the time inside, good for food preservation) SINGLE USE~10 copper each
Time seal scrolls(same thing) 20 USES~ 20 silver each
Time seal scrolls(again same thing) INDEFINITE USE BUT CAN ONLY BE USED AT ONE OBJECT/LIVING THING IDK AT A TIME ~10 gold
A pran of cingles(really crispy chips, definitely not a can of Pringles)~1000 gold
NO REFUNDS
Hope y’all buy these, I have no idea where to put them
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arlana-likes-to-write · 11 months
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Reunited
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Summary:  After being deployed for 8 months, you return home to surprise your family.
Warning: Alternative Universe - No modern setting, fluff and angst, reader is the military and Natasha is a military wife, mention of violence/death, no usage of Y/n 
Word count: 2.3k 
‘The girls made sure to pick out loads of snacks for you and the crew. So make sure you share. There is something for your eyes only so please keep that to yourself. I countdown the days until you are home. All my love.’ You smiled as you reread the letter from your wife two more times. For the past 5 months, you survived on these letters and short phone calls from your family back home. You loved serving your country, it was the greatest honor but a wife and two kids at home made it harder to leave. “Is that from the misses?” Clint asked. You took the other envelope out before he took the box from you.
“Of course it is,” Maria said, joining Clint as he dug through the box. She chose a small can of Pringles. “Look at that smile.” You rolled your eyes, used to the teasing from them.
“Is this for us to share?’ Bucky asked, walking up behind you and grabbing the envelope in your hand.
“Hands to yourself, Barnes,” you said, placing the envelope in your pants pocket for later. “We all can’t be lucky enough to serve with our partner.”
“Ain’t lucky for us,” Maria mumbled, throwing a package of nerds to you. “Especially when you walk in on them.” Bucky’s ears turned pink but he shrugged his shoulders. He took a bag of trail mix. This was one of the reasons you hated the thought of retiring. You found a family amongst the men and women you served with. You were part of an elite group of soldiers that the US government sent in for Black Op missions. Under the command of Nick Fury, the team consisted of you, Maria Hill, Clint Barton, Bucky Barnes, and Steve Rogers. They were your brothers and sister but you could not wait to be home.
*
‘Everyone loved the snacks you picked out for them. I’m pretty sure they ate more of them than me. I told a local jewelry maker about you and the girls and how much you mean to me. So she made me three moon necklaces and a sun for me. She said it symbolizes that even though we aren’t together physically I’m always with you and you are with me. Similar to how the moon and sun can’t exist without each other, I’m not me without you. I can’t wait to be home with my girls. All my love.’ Natasha finished your letter. She wanted to reread it but Rose and Hailey were excitedly waiting for her to put the necklaces on. So she did. Once the clasp was in place, they kissed her on the cheek and ran outside to join the other kids. It was a spring day and the Romanoff house was filled with people, food, and laughter. Natasha sighed, stood up, and walked into the kitchen. Laura was there, cutting up a watermelon. “How was the letter?” She asked.
“It was nice hearing from her,” she held up her necklace. “Mind putting this on for me?” Laura nodded, taking the necklace and looking over the charm.
“It’s beautiful,” she said, placing it around Natasha’s neck. Laugher pulled the two mothers to look out of the kitchen window and out into the backyard. They watched as Cooper picked up Rose from behind and threw her into the pool. It was moments like this that Natasha wished you were home to witness them in person and not as a video or photo. Natasha would always support you and she knew you were doing great things but she missed you. Each deployment never got any easier. Laura sighed, putting the freshly cut watermelon into a bowl.
“It never gets easier, does it?” Natasha asked, looking at her friend.
“No,” Laura whispered. “I’m afraid it doesn’t.”
*
The party was over and the house was quiet. When it was quiet, it was hard for Natasha to mask how much she missed you and your absence affected her. She sat in bed with a photo album in her lap. She seemed to get sentimental whenever you sent a letter. Natasha worked at a gym as a personal trainer and Clint, who was a mutual friend, recommended you to try it out. As the story goes and a fact you liked to remind Natasha, she hated you. She thought you were cocky, arrogant, and annoying. But you were persistent and determined to break down Natasha’s walls. It worked and she was grateful you were patient and understanding. She grew up in the foster care system, bouncing between homes. Now she had everything she dreamt of as a kid; a wife that loved her, beautiful girls, and a house filled with love.
The bedroom door slowly opened and saw Rose and Hailey holding onto their stuffed animals. “What’s wrong, printsessy (princesses)?” Natasha asked, noticing their blotchy cheeks from their tears.
“We miss Mom,” Rose whispered. “Can we sleep in here?” Natasha smiled, placing the photo album on the nightstand.
“Come here,” she held open her arms as the twins climbed onto the bed and settled in on either side of her. Now that they were closer, Natasha saw it was the Build-A-Bears you got for them with a recorded message for their birthday.
“When will she be home?” Rose asked.
“Soon, moya lyubov' (my love),” Natasha kissed her head. The real answer was 4 more months.
“Do you think she’ll bring us another gift?” Hailey asked. It made Rose laugh so Natasha let the comment slide.
“I bet she will. Now let’s get some sleep.” The girls climbed underneath the covers and cuddled up against Natasha. “I love you, my sweets.”
“Love you too, mama.”
*
“Thank you for picking me up,” you said to Wanda. “I wanted to surprise Nat.”
“It’s no problem,” she smiled. “I almost had a heart attack when your name popped up on my phone.” You chuckled. You were home 2 months early. Usually, Natasha would be waiting for you at the airport with the girls and the signs they made. Instead, you called Wanda, your next-door neighbor. She and her husband, Vision, had twins of their own. Vision was in the military as well but was stationed locally in the cyber division. “Do you want me to record it?” Wanda asked. “I do love those military reunion videos on YouTube. They make me cry every time.
“That would be great,” you cried watching those videos as well. But right now you were focused on not throwing up all over Wanda’s car. Your leg was bouncing, you were so nervous.
“Hey,” Wanda said, pulling down the familiar neighborhood street. “It’s okay. She and the girls missed you.”
“I think I’m gonna throw up.” You admitted.
“Well don’t do that,” she deadpanned. “I just got the car detailed.” Her joke caused a momentary break in your anxiety and you laughed.
“Thank you for that,” you said as she parked the car in the driveway. You looked at your home. The driveway was covered in artwork from the girls and the plants had newly planted plants, that you knew Melina helped Natasha. Your wife did not have a green thumb. You got out of the car with your duffle bag over your shoulder. Wanda was right behind you as you rang the doorbell. You shifted on the balls of your feet as you waited. You’ve been pinned down by enemy fire, watched a van blow up right next to you, and had to administer first aid to save a falling soldier. But as you waited for the door to open, you were so nervous, terrified. Finally, the door opened and there she was, dressed in her typical workout outfit - black leggings and an oversized graphic T-shirt. Her red hair was pulled back in a high ponytail. “Hi,” you whispered.
*
Natasha had to be dreaming, right? There were 2 more months left of your deployment so why were you standing in front of her? With no sign of injury and wearing your off-duty uniform. You were here. You smiled, chuckling. “I haven’t seen you this shell-shocked since the day I asked you to marry me.” You teased her. Your small jab pulled her out of her trance. She dropped her pre-work bottle to the ground and ran over to you. You dropped your duffle bag to the ground and caught her in your arms. The force made you stumble slightly but you stayed on your feet. “Your home,” she mumbled against your neck. Her voice shook with emotion.
“I’m home, baby,” you said. “I’m home.”
*
“Rose and Hailey Romanoff,” the camp counselor called into the small gym. “Your mom is here to pick you up.” Her name made Hailey look towards the door and the small pause got her out of the small dodgeball game.
“You're out Romanoff!” Eric called out.
“That doesn’t even count,” Hailey said, walking over to the sideline where Rose was sitting. “I was distracted.” Rose giggled.
“You're so competitive for no reason,” she teased her sister. Hailey rolled her eyes. “Do you think we have a doctor’s appointment?” Hailey shook her head as the followed the counselor out of the gym and down the hallway of the school.
“Mom is usually good at reminding us. Maybe babushka (grandma) and dedushka (grandpa) came for a surprise visit.” Hailey loved her grandparents especially when she convinced Alexei to wrestle with her. Rose smiled.
“Or maybe Auntie Yelena came with Fanny and Lucky.”
“What about Aunt Kate or do you like Lucky more than her?” Hailey joked, watching her sister blush.
“You know that’s not-” The words died on her lips as they rounded the corner.
“What’s wrong?” Hailey looked away from her sister to the normal check-in and check-out area, expecting to see Natasha but no. She saw you.
“Mom!” They cried out, breaking out into a full sprint towards you. You knelt as they collided with you.
*
‘My girls,’ you thought as you hugged them. They looked so much like Natasha, fiery red hair and Rose had your eye color. Their heart was beating so fast, mimicking the speed of a hummingbird’s wings. You felt their tears on your neck. You looked over their shoulders and saw Natasha, tears in her green eyes. But she refused to let them fall. “What are you doing here?” Rose asked.
“Finished the mission early,” you said, pushing tears off her face.
“Did-did you beat the bad guys?” Hailey asked, refusing to get out of your arms. You didn’t mind, you’d hold them forever.
“Of course, I did, sweetheart,” you kissed her head. “Come on, let's go home.” You groaned as Hailey still refused to let go.
“Actually,” she said. “Can we get ice cream?”
*
“Are you watching the videos again?” You looked away from your phone and saw Natasha stepping out of the bathroom, wearing an old training shirt of yours and sleeping shorts. You placed your phone on the nightstand.
“You know if we post those videos with sad music,” you sat at the edge of your bed, parting your legs so Natasha could stand between them. “We could go viral.”
“Oh really?” She questioned. You hummed, kissing her stomach through the cotton shirt, and rested your hands on the back of her thighs. Natasha used her pointer finger underneath your chin and forced you to look up at her. She traced the slope of your nose and the bags underneath your eyes.
“Were you telling Hailey the truth when you said you stopped the bad guys?” You grabbed her hand and kissed her palm.
“We did,” you whispered. You never spoke about what you did overseas. Some of the missions were classified and you didn’t want to haunt the dreams of your family. “But some civilians didn’t make it.” She nodded, kissing your forehead and leaving her lips there. You closed your eyes, enjoying the feeling of her lips. “How long do we have until the girls come in?” She smirked.
“Not long enough so get your mind out of the gutter,” you pouted as she turned off the main light and you got into bed. “They’ll be at camp tomorrow and I’ll be all yours.” She said, settling in next to you and resting her head on your chest. You tightly wrapped your arms around her.
“I’ve missed this,” you whispered, taking a deep breath in her vanilla lotion. You felt her tears stain your shirt but you didn’t draw attention to them. You let her cry until you heard her quiet sniffles. It was your turn to lift her chin with your finger. “Do you want me to retire?” You asked. Her green eyes widened, a little red from her tears.
“You're too good at what you do,” she whispered. She was right in a way. You were an excellent marksman, hostage negotiator, and interrogator. But someone could replace you. Fury always had soldiers in mind to join the team. “You’ve saved so many people.”
“But I’m missing so much here,” you said against her lips. “I would need to do one more and I can be done with full benefits.”
“Okay,” she said, fully connecting your lips. You loved kissing Natasha. Her lips were soft and warm against yours.
“Okay,” you said. “I love you.”
“Love you more.”
*
When you woke up, Rose and Hailey were cuddled between you and Natasha. They were holding the Build-A-Bear stuffed animals you got them. You smiled, kissing both of their foreheads. Serving this country wasn’t worth missing. Your girls were your world. You needed to be home not across the sea in another country. “Mommy,” Rose mumbled.
“What’s up, baby?” She turned around to face you. Her eyes were barely open.
“I don’t want you to leave again,” she said, cuddling up against you. You closed your eyes, feeling tears swell.
“I know. One more,” you promised. “One more then I’m done.”  
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