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#5seconds of summer imagine
summerainss · 2 years
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confessions of a drunk girl
A/N: I am backkk!! I finally had some inspiration. This is just fluff once again. I don't think I can do anything else haha :)
Summary: finally opens up to Calum but she needs some alcohol in her system first.
Warnings: alcohol use
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We were just having a wrap party. I was of course nervous. I thought about making a move however I wasn’t sure about it just yet. I don’t really like taking risks, but I thought this one I could take. We finished the project; we could bump into each other, but we wouldn’t be able to interact. I could do this, I wasn’t certain about it, sure but it wasn’t that big of a deal. Only thing I had to do was to just to take a few shots. I would have an excuse. If things went down bad, I could just tell him I was drunk. My shameless drunk flirting could also be good of a use well.
So here I was giving myself a really small pep talk to go up to him. I had the courage to go up to him, I just cared about him and didn’t want to mess this up. I wasn’t afraid of rejection. I just didn’t want to mess this up. I could take him rejecting me. I just really, really fancied him.
Shit, I fancied him, and I had to be drunk to be able to admit it to myself. How the fuck was I going to explain it to him? I hated myself right at that moment. The thing is my solution to hating myself while being drunk is to just drink some more. It turned out strange, my solution I mean. I wouldn’t call the outcome exactly terrible although there was some regrets and embarrassing moments, I am overall glad I got drunk that night.
           I took those extra shots, and everything started to slow down a bit, the music wasn’t as clear anymore. Instead it was just loud. I couldn’t make out the lyrics. I saw him, he was talking to a mutual friend of ours, Luke. I may have mentioned the possibility of me finding Calum attractive, he tried to play the matchmaker ever since that moment. He was terrible at it. He couldn’t be discreet; it was just painful to watch him find excuses to leave Calum and I alone. His excuse when I came up to them was just ridiculous: he had to “flower his plant”. We were at least in his house, but it was just absurd and wasn’t believable at all. At least he was an adorable dumbass so I could forgive his nonsense behavior. I have to be honest though, if he hadn’t left us alone that night we wouldn’t be here today so I guess I am grateful to him at some point.
“He is ridiculous sometimes,” is the first thing Calum said to me shaking his head as he  tried to hide his smile.
“We accepted him that way. I don’t think he is capable of changing anymore.” I stated as I was staring at the lanky dork’s back until he disappeared into the crowd in the kitchen and couldn’t be seen anymore.
“ I guess so… But I have to say I never approved thi- Hey, you alright?” he asked as his expression suddenly changed into a worried one.
“Yeah… yea… Just a bit dizzy. Are you dizzy or am I dizzy alone? I wanna sit down.” I whined. My last sentence accidentally came off like a child begging to have ice cream before dinner. Suddenly I felt his hand on my back as a support. If I wasn’t dizzy before I would definitely start to be dizzy, then. I became soft from his touch alone. I wanted to give my body up and just let him hold me. I wanted to feel his embrace so badly…
“Come on,” he said as he brushed a single strand of hair behind my ear, “let’s have some fresh air.” He lead me to the backyard.
There were people here having a cigarette, chatting, or getting some fresh air just like us. I secretly wished we were alone but when we sat down on the couch beside the pool we were basically alone. He let go of my back and cold suddenly hit to where his hand used to be on my back. There was some space between us but since I wanted to hit on him, lay down, and stop the spinning in my head; I laid down on his lap. He seemed surprised. I wanted to celebrate that moment. Finally, I was able to catch him off guard, finally I was able to get him frustrated. Now, this must be what having power over someone felt like. I felt like doing a little bit more of this. I started to move my head around and in the end my face faced his crouch. I was in an extremely risky situation, plus I could feel Calum tensing with every move that I made. I had enough of that though. I just wanted to tell him. Tell him my every little secret, starting with my crush huge on him.
“Cal… Can I tell you something?” I mumbled. I opened my eyes that I have closed just a moment ago to get my thinking straight. When I opened my eyes I caught Calum staring at me. Now, I was the one who felt uneasy under his gaze. I could see that he was thinking something, he had that examining look on his face that made me feel like he could see my thoughts. I felt like an open book to him which I didn’t like, because it wasn’t who I was. I liked keeping it to myself, I liked the fact that my thoughts were mine and mine only. I had all the control over how people see me, they knew only parts I wanted them to know but Cal was different. The reason I think he could see through me was because she knew what it was like to be like me. He himself was private, a riddle to the others. The thing about these people is that the people who are riddles themselves know how to solve the other ones. There he was now, so close to solving mine. His fingers were combing through my hair:
“Of course, do you need anything? Is your stomach good?” it kind of stung he thought I was that intoxicated to show him this much attention.
“Yeah, no I’m fine. I just… Do you ever feel like you crave love? I mean of course you are loved; you have your family friends and all that, in your case fans who would die for you but like, I mean do you crave to love and to be loved? To even belong maybe? Sometimes I feel like I could explode from all the love I have to give, but sometimes I feel so weak I feel like I can’t even to look people in the eye,” I tried to explain but Cal just had a light smile on his face. “I’m sorry. I’m just talking nonsense,” I said as I shook my head. His smile remained nearly the same but now his teeth were showing. He looked so cute with his cheeks slightly pink from the alcohol he had consumed, his dimples were showing, and his eyes were shining with the dim lights of the party lights creeping on to the patio.
“No, you are not,” he assured me with a soft voice. “Believe me or not I understood exactly what you were trying to explain.” His hand was still tangled up in my hair, slowly playing with it. I felt like sitting up straight. This was it, it was the perfect moment, now or never I thought.
Now we were sitting next to each other, too close maybe. I turned to face him. I made the most intimate eye contact of my life at that moment. He was just looking at me with a dazed gaze almost high I would say if I didn’t know any better. I caught his sneaky glances to my lips and thought now was the time.
“You wanna know something else?” he only replied with a nod. Now he wasn’t even trying to hide his glances. He looked from my eyes to my lips.
“I really wanna kiss you, and be in love with you. I think I almost love you and I also want to be loved by you,” I rushed. All of my thoughts were mixing up. I had just confessed my stupid crush on him to him, but it didn’t even make any sense. I have fucked it up. I shut my eyes embarrassed and hid my face to the crook of his neck. I was blushing so heavily I couldn’t show my face. I felt his hand on my cheek, it traveled down to my chin. He whispered slowly:
“ Do you want to know something cool?” I nodded still hiding in his neck. “ I think I almost love you too.” He used his fingers that have been resting on my chin to lift up my face. As he stabled my face he started to lean in, looking up from my lips to my eyes one last time before kissing me. This was it, I thought. This was what I had been craving all along.
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bucky-barnes-lover · 5 months
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Kinktober day 18: More Angst than Smut
Luke Hemmings drabble
W.C 191
Fling/Hook up! Luke x Fem!reader
Warnings: REALLY SHIT WRITING! Angst, Mentions of sex, cursing.
Authors Note: Honestly, Idk wtf this is, I didn't have any ideas for anything else, Sorry. Also I wanted this to be a lot more smutty but as I said, I didn't have any ideas for Luke.
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I grabbed his curls, Moaning his name loudly. Pleasure over taking my body.
"Fuck baby. Didn't know you could be so wild" Luke exclaimed, catching his breath. His thrusts slowed, hitting my g-spot a couple more times before squirting hot cum inside my wet pussy.
"Holy shit Luke. That was amazing" I groaned at the loss of contact when he pulled out. "You were fucking great" Luke responded in exhaustion.
"I guess I'll see you next Wednesday, yeah?"
I nodded silently, holding back tears.
I felt used. Of course he only comes around on Wednesdays to fuck. He probably has a side bitch for every other day.
I don't know why I keep letting him in and keep falling for him.
I watch as he gets dressed, throwing me my shirt to put on. He tells me every single time he's here,
"Get a shirt on love. You don't want anyone walking in now do you?"
He likes having sex with the door unlocked. Always at my apartment even though he knows I have a roommate and he doesn't.
I get the sense that Luke isn't who he says he is.
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We should all know the drill by now. NOT PROOF READ!!
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5secondsof5sos · 1 year
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If “older” were a food, it would be soggy white bread.
It’s ok, you can say your favorite song is “Bad Omens.” It’s a banger.
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metyouinthehallway · 16 days
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what the fuck luke hemmings is going on tour and NOT coming to my city😞 another out of state concert for me!!!
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emotional-blender · 4 years
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morning voices and light sensitivity. (michael clifford x reader)
a/n: i truly am not sure what this is, but i'm in a slump and just needed to get something into the universe. might expand on it, might not. might write more michael, might not. every speck of feedback is appreciated. if you want to be added to the taglist please send me an ask or a message and i'll gladly add you!
wordcount: 579
warnings: none
***
honestly, there was no sight you loved better than the contrast of your brown arm slung over the pink skin of his chest. early mornings were your favorite, even when they started with the shrill sound of the alarm. that alarm was always followed by disgruntled moans and groans from the boy you shared your bed with.
"i don't wanna go to school today," michael grumbled as you pushed him toward his side of the bed and the offending sound. you had refused to open your eyes yourself. it was bad enough that you could see the light through your eyelids, the familiar blanket of dull redness that was the morning sun shining right through your skin and whatever blood vessels traveled through the flap of skin. that flap of skin was all that protected you from the bright sun and you liked it 5 hat way, thank you very much.
you can't help the sigh of relief that  leaves you when the noise stops. you're not sure what took him so long to shut it up. you feel his weight shift back toward you and the sign morphs into one of content as his arm circles your middle, scooping himself closer to your back, pressing his head against your shoulder.
"then don't go," you finally respond after a moment. you turn toward him, your hand coming up to run fingers through his blonde hair. he let's put a sleepy laugh against you because there's no school, but you roll with his words unfailingly like you always do. your whole life is a mess of sarcasm and laughter.
when you finally open your eyes it's a mistake. you knew it was going to be but you can't help but whine anyway as you snap them back shut. "miss winter," neither of you are morning people and it's so much easier to force your eyes open when it's still dark out and the sun isn't being offensive. a moment later the red blanket that is your vision darkens and curiously, you peek an eye open. it's hard not to let a sleepy smile take over your face. michael's arm is up in the air, shielding your eyes from the bright sun with a sheet. it's much less offensive. 
"better?" he asks as your dark eyes meet his green ones. you nod, both eyes open now, allowing them the time to adjust in the gentler climate he's provided you with. 
"yeah," you put a single word to your motion and snuggle in closer, pressing lips to the beard on his face. he holds the blanket up for a few more moments before letting it down, his newly freed up arm circling you as he pulls you up onto his chest in one fell swoop. your laughter is as scratchy as his, like someone took sandpaper to both your throats overnight. somewhere the hug he's giving you turns into fingers wiggling on your sides, your ass, your thighs, your armpits. he's everywhere in all your most ticklish spots seemingly all at once. you wriggle against him uncontrollably. 
"mike! mikey! MICHAEL!" you're breathless and he finally let's up as you somehow. manage to yell out his name, failing miserably at sounding stern. but he's solved the issue of sandpaper morning voice and eased you put of light sensitivity. all that's left is to lay, half on him. and half off, quietly admiring the contrast of your brown arm on his pale pink chest.
taglist: @calumscalm @thesubtweeter @treatallwithkindness
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willddheartt · 4 years
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Babylon: Neon Lights | C.H. Chapter Two: Talk Fast
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DISCLAIMER: SOME PARTS MIGHT BE R RATED !! Series warnings: Substances (alcohol & cigarettes), Anger (snappy comments), that’s it?? 
Series Masterlist 
June 26th “Hey Ash, what movie should I put on?” I called from his couch  “I don’t know, do you wanna cry or laugh?” He asked, walking in from the kitchen with bowls of snacks.  “Should we ask the others when they get here?”  Ashton shook his head, “They’re late, no choice. Them’s the rules.”  “Okay, you pick,” I shrugged, handing two DVD cases to him  “Definitely 21,” He pointed 
I nodded, putting the disk in the player and waiting for it to read before taking a seat in the white chair to the left of the tv. Ashton pulled the table between, where he sat on the couch and myself so we could both reach the snacks. Just as the previews on the disk started playing the front door opened and we heard Michael yell through the house. “Honey, we’re home”  “What are we watching?” Violet asked, walking in and jumping over the back of the couch to sit in the middle  “You’re late, 21 jump street,” Ashton answered  “Aw, I love that one,” Michael said, grabbing a bag of gummies and sitting on the last seat on the couch, leaving Calum and Luke to the floor cushions. 
“Didn’t we watch this one last time?” Luke asked as he took a seat on the floor, leaning against the couch  “Wasn’t my choice, blame Ash,” I held up my hands  Calum sat next to the chair I sat in and scoffed at my words, “‘Course it's not your fault, never is, hm?” 
I looked down at him from the corner of my eye, shooting him a confused look, but shaking it off and turning my attention back to the television, doing my best to ignore Calum for the rest of the night. The new knowledge that Ashton gets upset when Calum and I bicker, making me more mindful of the situation and the people who are around. Halfway through the movie, I found my eyelids drooping shut as I sank further down in the chair, trying to cover up with my hoodie, but only being left colder. A tap on the side of my leg turned my attention to the floor, Calum handed me the blanket Luke discarded to the side when he first sat down. I muttered a quiet ‘thanks’, barely above a whisper, I wasn’t sure he even heard. 
Friday movie nights at Ashton’s everyone normally stayed over, most of us falling asleep during a movie, and it being too late to drive home by the time we woke up. Ashton's house was covered in mostly white, making even the latest hours of the night look like mid-evening.  It was two, almost three in the morning, I was so thankful I didn’t have work in the morning. I don’t think I could do customer service with two hours of sleep. I shuffled around Ashton’s kitchen, trying to get a glass of water as quiet as possible as to not wake anyone up, and failing.  Another pair of feet shuffled over Ashton’s hardwood floors, coming up behind me. I turned around, being faced with a half-asleep Calum. In the low light of the dark kitchen and his messy hair, it almost looked like I could fall for him. Almost. 
“What are you doing up?” He said coldly, voice raspy and laced with sleep.  I shrugged, sipping on my water to avoid answering him. I didn’t have an answer to why I was up, what? I couldn't sleep? Well no shit. “Ignore me, it's not like I asked you a question or anything,” Calum mumbled to himself as he waited for the glass to fill up “My bad Mr.Hood, do I owe you a reply?” I said innocently, raising my eyebrows trying to look shocked before letting my face fall and eyes roll. 
Calum and I stood in the kitchen in silence, finishing the glasses of water. Sometimes I wished things were different between us. Especially the times when he looked exceptionally attractive, there were times when the thought of hugging or even kissing him wasn’t totally repulsive. 
-
July 1st A new shipment of men's clothing and a bunch of slacking coworkers left me folding and hanging up the new men's dress pants and shirts. Though it wasn't all that bad, the speakers of the tired soundtrack that played day after day were quieter in the men's section, giving me a bit of peace.  I stood back in the dressing rooms, hiding away as I continued to fold the pants, along with any clothing that was left to be put away. 
I just finished the pile of pants and went to start on the mountain of clothing that was left from other customers but noticed a man walking towards me with an arm full of different coloured button-downs. 
“Do you need a dressing room, sir?” I asked, customer service voice showing my fake enthusiasm. “Yeah, please-” The man's nice tone faltered when his face lifted and his eyes met with mine as I stood in front of him.  “Calum, hey,” I said through gritted teeth, and went straight to unlocking the dressing room door.  “Rossa, I didn't know you worked here,” He sounded surprised,  I nodded, “Violet and I have worked here for a while now,” Calum hummed in response, “Just don't make a mess, and think I’ll have to clean it up,” I added before he entered the dressing room.  
There were many questions floating around in my head that I wanted to ask him, but at the same time, I knew we were not the type to talk outside of our mutual friends. I went back to folding clothes in the corner behind a table until Calum stepped out the door of the dressing room in a baby blue short sleeve button down.  “I normally ask the attendants how I look when I’m not sure but I don't know if you can give me an honest opinion,” Calum said nervously.  “Do you mean, can I look past our differences?” I asked, he nodded. “I guess, where I have to be professional,” I said, to anyone else who worked here it sounded like Calum and I were joking around like friends would from the tone of voice I used because I wasn't trying to lose my job over Calum Hood. 
I looked him up and down and motioned for him to do a spin, waiting for him to obey and do a quick twirl so I could see how the shirt fit in the back. I walked up to him, tugging on the sleeves, noticing the shirt was too big and baggy.  “It's too big,” I commented, “For it to fit right you need the size down. Try on something else and I’ll run outback and get you the proper size,” I said  “Don’t bother, it was just a maybe.” He shook his head, waving me off.  “Okay, but it doesn't look bad. The colour is nice.”  Calum nodded and went back into the dressing room, I returned to the table with the pile of clothes. This time I was able to get a few shirts folded before Calum came out. Just as I picked up a shirt to fold he came out in a yellow short sleeve button down, the same style as the blue one. 
“What do you think?” He asked, I had gripped the shirt I picked up tightly, so much so that it would need to be ironed before getting folded, I was sure he noticed the white of my knuckles and the way I swallowed the ball in my throat before speaking. “It's nice,” I nodded, “The yellow looks good with your skin tone.” He spun around to look at himself in the mirror, “Does this one fit right?” I asked “Yeah, it should be my size,”  “It's nice,” I repeated  “Are those your actual thoughts or just something you tell the customers to get them to buy the item?” Calum asked  “It's me putting our past behind us to honestly help you with shirt shopping, it's also me not wanting to lose my job from treating you normally but we’ll look past that,” He rolled his eyes and scoffed at my words,  “Alright,” He nodded 
Moments later Calum came out dressed in the same hoodie he arrived in and handed me the shirts he didn't want, keeping a wine red, forest green and the sunshine yellow one.  “Thanks for the help,” He mumbled  “My pleasure Mr.Hood.” I tipped a pretend hat to him, rolling my eyes at my own actions, “Anyway, if you don't mind me being nosey, Why the nice clothes all the sudden?” 
“Ashtons Birthday needed something nicer.” He shrugged  “What was decided on that? Nobody has told me,”  “Probably because they’re realizing how annoying you are,”  For once I was left almost speechless at something he said, “Ouch, that's low even for you, Calum,” 
The realization at what he said finally rang through his head, and I could have sworn I caught a sliver of guilt on his features.  “The club, Ask Vi, she’ll fill you in.” He mumbled before walking off. 
-
I caught Violet coming to take my place at shift change as  I was on my way to punch out. 
“Violet,” I said, catching her attention, stopping her.  “Hey,” She smiled  “Has Calum been different? Like did something happen or anything?” I asked the comment he made earlier still stuck in the back of my head. Violet shook her head, “Not that I know of, why the sudden interest?”  “He was in today for something, but something he said was just really out there, like worse than our normal bickering, that's all.” I shrugged  “Why? What did he say?” Violet asked  I shook my head, “Doesn’t matter. Probably just Calum being Calum. I'll see ya after work,” 
Calum being Calum, something that never changed. Especially in a few hours. 
Violet and I were having dinner with the boys, as a celebration for Ashton’s birthday without the huge amounts of alcohol. It was just time to spend with close friends at a nice restaurant and talk. Even though we all spent a lot of time together, at one another's houses, it was nice to go out for a change.  Ashton picked the restaurant we were eating at, thankfully it was nothing fancy, and we ended up at a bar-restaurant. With the poot tables and bar on one side and restaurant on the other. The entire night Calum continued to make really low remarks, much like the one he made earlier today, his actions turning me away from wanting to spend time with the rest of the group. 
Excusing myself to get some air, was actually my way of saying I was going to chain smoke two cigarettes quickly to ease the stress. 
The only thing swirling around in my mind, as the second cigarette took the edge off, ‘What did I ever do to Calum that made him so hostile?” 
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lashtoncurls · 6 years
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Lucky
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Summary: Calum being a sweet nugget, nothing more 
Words: 432 (first drabble i write in a while, lol)
Warnings: couple curse words, that’s it
“Woooo!” Calum yelled out as he continued dancing to the loud music blaring around the apartment. You laughed and got off the couch as someone called you from the kitchen.
Cal had decided that you guys had a party to celebrate everything that had been going on with the album and to celebrate before they left on tour. You would be accompanying him on the second leg of the European tour, but that was still two months away from him and his antics.
“Y/N, do you think maybe we should pull him down from the table?” Ashton asked, watching Calum dance crazily on the living room center table.
“Let him have his fun, Ash.” You replied laughing, but was cut off by a loud thud and a lot of curse words and grunting. You and Ash ran towards the commotion, only to find Cal laying on the ground with his drink all over his shirt and face. Ashton burst out in laughter as you watched him get up.
“Fuck off, bro.” He said to Ashton and pushed him off but you could see the smile in his face.
The rest of the party continued like this, the boys getting hammered and the loud music going. You watched how animated Cal got when he was drunk and around his friends. He always was up for having fun, specially if it included a couple drinks and Nickelback.
Slowly but surely everyone started heading home, leaving you guys alone for the night. He was really hammered which meant he was going to talk until he drifted off to sleep. You smiled at him as he came to the couch and laid his head on your lap.
“Thanks for putting up with me, babe.” He said as he traced circles on your thigh.
“It’s no problem, Cal. I seriously wouldn’t have any other way.” You answered as you ruffled his hair and smiled.
“But you’re so good to me, Y/N. I don’t know what I did to deserve you.”
In that moment, you thought back to how you two had met and how luck you had been to end up with him. “I’m the lucky one here. You’re the best boyfriend and person anyone could ask for.” 
He looked up at you with a smile in his face and settled back into your lap, his breath slowing down as he drifted off to sleep mumbling what sounded like an i love you. You closed your eyes and fell asleep as well, the light rumble in his chest from his snoring lulling you to sleep.
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Let’s Dance {Michael Clifford}
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There were not many people that Michael trusted with his hair; Lou Teasdale and himself were the only two for a long time until he met the woman he was marrying in less than twenty-four hours. She had come into his life like a goddamn hurricane and turned it upside down from everything he knew in the best way possible. One of the first things she had addressed was the dryness of his hair and how brittle it got when he stripped the off-the-wall colors in order to change it. Now he was never without coconut oil in his bag on the road and their medicine cabinet at home was an amalgamation of different brands of the miracle substance.
Naturally, this meant that Michael was spending his last night of being an unmarried man with his hair shiny and slick from the oil and wrapped up in a towel (like she had taught him) to keep the heat in. He wanted to have his hair looking smart for his bride the next day.
“I should take a picture of you and put it on Instagram,” Calum chuckled from the loveseat across from him. “I’m sure the fans would just eat this up!”
Michael shrugged. “They’ve seen me looking a hell of a lot weirder, mate.”
Calum could only laugh at his friend as they both began scrolling through their respective Twitter feeds, the silence that followed comforting. It reminded Michael of when they were younger and hanging out after school in his bedroom, ignoring their homework in favor of searching dumb YouTube videos in each other’s presence.
“Is it weird knowing you’re getting married tomorrow?” Calum asked, breaking the silence some time later as his best friend’s fiancé popped up in his feed saying how she needed her beauty rest for the next day.
“Kinda,” Michael admitted as he set his phone to the side. “I mean, I don’t think it’s weird to know that I’m marrying her because she’s the only person I’ve ever thought about marrying for real. She’s it and I know it. It’s weird to think that I’m getting married in general though. Like, I’m still just some punk ass kid from Sydney who dropped out of school to be in a band. I always thought that adults were the ones who got married and I guess I don’t feel like an adult. I feel like we’re just two kids who know we’re it for each other. Does that make sense?”
The bassist nodded with a smile on his lips. He was happy that one of his oldest friends was about to move forward in his life with the woman who helped bring out his best. Michael deserved to be happy.
~*~*~ *~ *~ *~ *~ *~ *~ *~ *~ *~ *~ *~ *~ *~ *~ *~ *~ *~ *~
‘The coconut oil last night was a good decision,’ Michael thought as he checked himself in the mirror one last time. His hair looked healthy and bright. He was clean-shaven and his suit looked really good if he did say so himself.
He was ready to be married.
He chuckled to himself as the realization hit him and he turned his back on the mirror to exit the small powder room attached to the office where his groomsmen were gathered. Michael surveyed them like a general, giving each of them a onceover just to be sure they were completely dressed and ready.
“Stop biting your lip,” Ashton chastised him. “If she walks down that aisle only to find you with a bloody lip she’ll kill you before you get the chance to say ‘I do.’”
Michael hadn’t even realized that he’d been biting his lip, but he composed himself quickly knowing that the drummer was right.
Luke rested a hand on his shoulder. “We gotta get out there. You ready, mate?”
Taking a deep breath, Michael nodded. He waited until all of his groomsmen had filed out the door before following behind them, breaking off to head to the front of the church while they headed back towards the bridal room.
When he walked out to take his place to the left of the officiant, his eyes scanned the crowd.  It was amazing to see all the people from his life and her life that wanted to be here to see them make it their life. He immediately caught sight of his parents across from hers in the front two rows. He smiled when he spotted John Feldmann and his family next to the Madden brothers and their families (Michael never thought Nicole Richie or Cameron Diaz would be at his wedding but some things in life are really weird). Alex and Lisa Gaskarth were behind them—Alex having a protective hand on the tiny bump under Lisa’s dress—with the other members of All Time Low close by.
“It’s wonderful to look out and see all those who love you, isn’t it?” the officiant asked, catching the groom’s attention. Michael could only nod because he thought if he opened his mouth all that would come out would be a tiny squeak. He was nervous that something would go wrong like that ridiculous miniseries she had made him watch when they first got together, but deep down he knew that he was just anxious because this was a really fucking important day and he would die of embarrassment if he messed it up somehow.
After what felt like an eternity to Michael, the woman across the way from him began to play a light processional on the organ and the doors at the back of the church opened.
Ashton and her youngest sister entered first, the height difference not as comical as it was the night before at the rehearsal since this time she had on her heels. Both of them smiled as cameras flashed on either side of them. Ashton being used to it, was calm as could be—happy actually, to be photographed doing something important instead of buying a cup of coffee. Her sister was beaming, happy to have a tiny slice of the attention on her oldest sister’s big day.
Next came Luke and her other sister, just a few years younger than her. Unlike Ashton and her youngest sister, those two were still as awkward as the night before. While Luke was used to the flashing of the cameras and having a lot of eyes on him, he wasn’t used to it with a lanky girl in heels clinging to his arm for dear life. Her poor sister looked like a deer caught in the headlights as she cautiously walked forward with Luke.
As best man, Calum entered next with the maid of honor, her best friend, on his arm.  They walked together with ease, used to all of the cameras flashing every time they went out. Dating a rockstar made her best friend adjust to the attention quickly and it showed as they glided arm-in-arm down the aisle with confidence. Each of them gave a reassuring smile to Michael as they reached the front and parted ways to go to their respective positions.
The organ music changed to the wedding march then, and everyone rose from their seats to get a good look at the bride as she made her grand entrance. Having chosen to walk alone, she moved in a perfect line down the center of the aisle as everyone around her scrambled to get a picture. She kept her gaze forward and a small smile on her perfectly painted lips.
Michael was in awe as he watched her grow closer, more tiny details catching his attention. He took in the sparkle of the beading on her dress as it caught the bright church lights and the way it matched the sparkle of her earrings perfectly. On her left wrist he spied the bracelet he got her for their first Christmas together, the delicate silver loops intertwined just north of the engagement ring she had been wearing proudly for almost a year.
It wasn’t until she was directly in front of him that he noticed the aged medallion around her neck, St. Christopher’s likeness surrounded by a prayer for protection. The family heirloom that her mother kept in a display case in the den of their home was an interesting sight for Michael. He had never seen it outside the case in all the time they were together.
He flicked his eyes from the medallion up to her eyes as he reached his hand out to help her up the stairs separating them from the officiant.
“You’re beautiful,” he whispered as they climbed the stairs together.
~*~*~ *~ *~ *~ *~ *~ *~ *~ *~ *~ *~ *~ *~ *~ *~ *~ *~ *~ *~
As great as it was to actually marry her, Michael was excited for the reception. He knew parties between their two families were fun but now they were adding in the rest of the band and numerous other musicians who were going to take full advantage of the bar. There was no better recipe for a party in his opinion.
After getting their pictures taken for what felt like an eternity, they were able to make their way to the reception with the rest of the wedding party. They didn’t wait long before the groomsmen and bridesmaids entered the expansive ballroom, followed by the newlyweds who had decided to enter the reception to the “Imperial March” from Star Wars.
Toasts were made by her best friend, father, and each of Michael’s band members which segued into the quick serving of dinner to the guests. Everyone ate and chatted merrily as the DJ played classic rock ballads from REO Speedwagon and Led Zeppelin. Laughter flowed as freely as the drinks from the bar when the bride and groom cut the cake, the pair smiling just long enough for the photographer to snap a sweet picture before smashing slices into each other’s mouths.
Their first dance as husband and wife was slow, close, and intimate- they swayed together effortlessly. The soft chords of the song they danced to blurred Michael’s gaze into tunnel vision which led directly to her smiling face and wide, excited eyes. Even when their first dance ended and every other importance dance ensued, he couldn’t focus completely on anything except her and the pure joy on her face.
The joy escalated as the night wore on. Laughter loud and sweet as church bells poured from her mouth when he went under her dress for the garter and when she threw the bouquet, her dimples popped out from her flushed cheeks as every guest lined up to take their turn to dance with the bride (after taking a quick tequila shot, of course), and happy tears gleamed at the corners of her eyes as she swayed with Michael to the last song of the night, whispering to him how she couldn’t wait to have their first breakfast together as The Clifford’s.
“In honor of it, I won’t even eat scrambled eggs,” she giggled, knowing he hated eggs.
Michael beamed. “I love you, Mrs. Clifford.”
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jjchantill · 2 years
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Content: Calum
A/N: Another request is done! Happy reading folks!
He nervously taps his fingers against the steering wheel while stealing glances over at you. What was wrong with you? Why were you being so quiet? Why were you sitting so far away? He doesn't remember doing anything to make you angry and he hasn't forgotten any important dates. So, why are you sitting in the passenger seat, facing away from him, and sitting quietly? What could he have possibly done? Usually, your fingers are intertwined with his, or your hand is on his thigh. Usually, you're singing along to your favorite song on the radio. However, today for some reason you haven't touched him, and you've been silent since you got in the car. He clears his throat causing you to finally look over at him before shooting him a small smile and returning your gaze to the window. Finally, he decides to speak up.
"Are we going to talk about what I did to piss you off or..."
"What do you mean?" you ask, turning to face him.
"What do you mean, what do I mean? You! You're being all silent and distant and stuff, so I must have done something to make you angry. Usually you're all happy with your singing alone to the radio and touching me. Today, you haven't spoken a word since we got in the car and you're sitting as far away from me as possible, so what's wrong?"
"I'm not angry and nothing's wrong. Should something be wrong?" you ask.
Calum shrugs, "I don't know but you're clearly angry about something because you only give me the silent treatment when you're mad."
You're silent causing him to glance over at you, his eyes meeting yours.
"Well..."
"Well, what?"
"Well, what's wrong?" he asks.
"Do I seem like something is wrong?" you ask.
"No, but..."
You shake your head, "Calum, I'm fine. Nothing is wrong. I'm just...content."
"You're never content," he says.
"Hey!"
"I'm not saying it's a bad thing. I'm just saying you always feel things in a big way. Like you're always super happy or super sad or super angry."
"Well...today I'm content," you say, turning back to face the window.
"Love..."
"Calum..."
"Just tell me what's wrong so I can fix it," he says.
"Calum, there is nothing wrong. I'm fine, okay?"
He glances over at you," okay."
While he said okay, he still wasn't convinced that you weren't mad at him for some reason. Which causes him to keep stealing glances at you while you fiddle with the radio.
"Calum, I can feel you staring."
"I'm sorry, I just..."
"Think something is wrong?" you finish for him.
"Well, yeah. You've been silent for almost this whole drive, and haven't touched me once. Normally, you're like holding my hand and singing at the top of your lungs."
"Have you ever thought that maybe I'm not in the mood?"
"You're not in the mood to touch me?"
"Yeah, I'm content with keeping my hands to myself."
"That's bull. You're always in the mood to touch me. Just like I'm always in the mood to touch you. We're a very touchy couple."
"We're a touchy couple?" you say.
"Yep."
You shake your head at him, "whatever you say, babe."
You return your gaze to the window again and it only takes a moment before Calum is once again clearing his throat.
"For the love of...if I touch you will you stop asking me if something is wrong?" you ask.
"Yes."
You roll your eyes before grabbing Calum's hand and intertwining your fingers with his.
"Happy?" you ask.
"Extremely. You?" he asks.
"I'm annoyed because my fiancé wouldn't leave me alone until I held his hand," you say.
"Wow, he sounds like a real pain in the ass," he says.
"He is," you say.
"Hey!"
"I'm kidding," you laugh.
He shoots you a wink before kissing the back of your hand, "I know and besides it takes one to know one."
"I take it back, I wasn't kidding. You are a real pain in the ass," you laugh.
"But I'm your pain in the ass," he says.
You laugh again before squeezing Calum's hand and starting to lightly hum along with the radio. Calum can't fight the smile that crosses his face as he settles in the for the rest of the drive.
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loveofmylife12 · 3 years
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My fav writers
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Be Alright (l.h)
Pairing: Luke Hemmings x Fem!Reader
Requested: Yes!
Summary: You go on tour with Luke and the boys for the first time, but things don’t go as planned as you try to fit in.
Warnings: Angst with Fluff. Anxiety, panic attacks, low self esteem. Language. Hostility. Some grammatical errors (English is not my first language, I’m sorry)
Word count: 6.9 k
Author’s Note: This fic takes place after the pandemic. It deals with anxiety and panic attacks, but please remember that the symptoms as well as what the person experiences it’s always different, this is just how I see and experience these cases. Please, if you want to learn more about them get informed by a reliable source. Remember that Reblogs, Comments, Likes and Feedback are much appreciated and you don’t know how much it helps me! ❤️ Hope you like it and Happy Reading 🌻🦋✨
My materialist // wanna be part of my taglist?
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Picture taken from Pinterest
@theshyspy : (...) So I was wondering if you could write something with Luke or cal (whoever feels most natural?) where the reader just gets really anxious and he takes care of her and calms her down? maybe making sure she eats and/ or drinks enough, that she gets some rest, perhaps he sings for her? Idk just some fluff🤷🏼‍♀️ (It’s totally ok if you don’t want to, or don’t feel comfortable writing it !! I know it can be triggering for some people so just leave it if it bothers you in any way!!🙆🏼‍♀️💕)
The feeling of an ice-cold touch shook you out of your dreamless sleep. You nearly jumped out of your seat before remembering where you were and what you were doing.
The light came through the small window, illuminating your seats and the small aisle that separated you from your friends. The air conditioner was turned off and you made a mental note to thank Luke later, he knew how cold you get on these travels.
Speaking of “Why are your hands so damn cold?!” You scolded your boyfriend as you rub your eyes, trying to wake up and steady your heartbeat from the scare you just got.
Luke just pressed his lips in a thin line, not wanting to laugh at your sudden reaction but also not to smile like an idiot due to your sleepy state. Even after a 15-hour flight you still looked cute as hell in his eyes.
“Sorry, love,” He said with a smile once you looked at him “I was having a drink, and then came time to wake you up. I didn’t notice my hands were cold”
You murmured some gibberish close to an ‘okay’ and yawned “How long was I out?”
Luke cringed “20 minutes”
“What?!”
It was no surprise, you could never sleep well in places that were not a proper bed. You didn’t want to think about how it would be like to sleep in a bunk next to your six-foot-four Australian boyfriend.
“I thought I slept longer” You pouted “Although it didn’t feel like much”
“Another bad dream?” He asked, placing his head on your shoulder as he intertwined his fingers with yours, slowly playing with them.
“A lack thereof, actually,” You said, yawning again “But don’t worry, I’ll sleep when we get to the hotel”
Luke smiled and brought your hands to his lips, softly placing a kiss on your knuckles as you cuddled next to him.
Your heart was beating loud and you hoped he wouldn’t notice, or if he did then he did not say anything and you were grateful. It was stressful enough to travel on tour for the first time and to know that you might bring him down with your anxious overthinking was not doing great with you.
Luckily, your mind grew quiet as Calum popped his head from the seat in front of you.
“Excited for your first tour?” He asked with a grin. He looked brand new, and as you looked around you realized they all do. For a moment there you had to remind yourself that this is what they do for a living.
“Mmh hmm” You hummed, head still placed over Luke’s while you played with his hair “Kinda nervous, though” You admitted.
“Why?” This time it was Ashton the one who asked, popping his head from the seats next to yours as he joined the conversation “It’s going to be fun! Like a big road trip” He chuckled.
“Yeah but-” Your voice was cut out by the pilot who announced over the speakers your arrival at the airport.
You thought about sharing your fears with the boys, given that this was your first time flying across the world with them you didn’t exactly know what to expect and you were scared to find that out in the worst situations. But then, how could they know? After all, how much pressure could they have when they pretty much secured the love of everyone? You, however, were just the girlfriend and it almost felt like you have to earn that place on tour.
The fans will be looking at them but criticizing you. It’s not like it would be your first time dealing with it since you went public with your relationship, God knows it’s not easy dealing with that But it won’t be just them this time, there’s also the paparazzi, the crew, the boys themselves even if they don’t notice; they are all expecting you to be ready and up for it, perfect all the time. Not to mention the stress of traveling and the schedules, the jet lag and the-
Once again your thoughts were put on pause before you could finish overthinking them as you felt Luke shake next to you. You met his gaze but he was looking to the side, trying hard to stiffen his laughter as Ashton dropped an ice cube into Michael's back under his shirt, waking him up with a jump and a mix of curses.
You shook your head and laughed along with them. You should be thankful for having them, after all, they are your friends and they could help you manage all of those pits of anxiety that started to grow. Anything could happen on this tour and, at least you know that you won’t be bored.
Luke helped you with your carry-out and let you walk in front of him, all while placing his hands on the sides of your waist and walking -or actually more like waddling along with you. You giggled as he placed his head on top of yours, making it difficult to walk for the both of you but he wasn’t going to let go. That’s one of the things you love about him; he is never afraid to show his affection and be close to you, almost in a protective manner. You feel safe with him and you know the feeling is mutual.
You laughed with the rest of the boys as you made your way to claim your luggage, joking around and teasing each other much to the annoyance of the other passengers. You felt how Luke’s chest rumbled with laughter, and in the few quiet moments, you got while waiting for your bags he managed to hold you closer and press little kisses around your forehead and cheeks, making you giggle in his tight embrace. You almost forgot how tired you were from the flight.
Almost. But your body had a different plan.
As your bags were taking their sweet time, you could hear the distant voices of the boys drifting away from you. Slowly, you began to drift away too, your eyelids becoming heavy as you struggled to stay up. Soon enough, the notices became a light buzzing sound inside your head.
“Y/N?” Luke asked as he felt you become heavier on his grip “Baby?” He looked down at your face and saw you fight to get your eyes open and failed to do so as they kept shutting without your permission.
He cringed as he saw your tired face, knowing that he was once again tasked with the job of waking you up. If it were up to him, he would’ve carried you in his arms all the way to the van just for you to get some sleep. But it was common for them for fans to welcome them in the airport accompanied by some paparazzi who tried to get a bad shot out of them and, despite his wishes for you to be completely rested and healthy, he needed to wake you up.
“Y/N, are you alright, love?” He asked whispering in your ear, rubbing his hands up and down your arms hoping that in that way he could somehow share some of his energy with you.
You quickly came back to your senses once you felt Luke’s arms leave your waist and hold you by your shoulders and elbows. A red flush covered your face as you realized where you were standing -and almost falling, asleep.
“Y-yeah,” You said, standing up straight as you pull away from his hold, somehow trying to prove your point “I’m just-“
“Tired. Yeah, it’s okay” Luke reassured you as he came closer and wrapped you in his arms by the waist “I was just like you when I experienced my first jet lag. It will go away”
You scoffed “Yeah? In how long?”
“In like four months when we get home” He teased, immediately bursting into laughter when he saw you glare at him.
You slightly punched his chest, mocking anger. But soon enough you found yourself laughing along “I think I just need to eat something”
Luke stopped laughing, replacing his smile with a concerned gaze “Didn’t you eat on the plane?”
“I couldn’t. I tried to eat while you were asleep, but my stomach just rejected the food so I chose to wait until we were on land”
Luke shook his head and was about to say something when Calum interrupted him to give you both your bags.
“Those were the last ones,” He said “We need to get going”
Luke nodded as he watched him walk away, turning to you once he was out of sight.
You could feel his worried stare, but you just smiled at him as you placed your hand on his cheek “Don’t worry love. I can buy something from here and then eat some real food at the hotel if that would make your worries go away”
He just sighed and nodded. You smiled reassuringly at him and brought him closer to peck his lips “Love you”
“Love you, too,” He said with a love fool grin “Ready to start the tour?” He asked excitedly.
You nodded enthusiastically as you grabbed his hand and started walking along with him towards the gates, feeling ready to face up anything.
Well, you weren’t ready to face up to what ensued.
As soon as those gates opened you were bombarded with flashes of cameras and screams from thousands of people.
Fans were gathered outside the airport gates, waiting for their favorite band to arrive. Of course, this led to the paparazzi being there as well, waiting to get an inside scoop of the boys’ first arrival on their world tour after the pandemic.
There were too many people for you to be able to see more than three meters in front of you. All of them were shouting Luke’s name as he tried to make his way out of there and lead you to safety.
You lifted your gaze and saw how he was smiling at the fans, waving with his free hand as his grip on your hand became tighter. Strangers were approaching the both of you very quickly, pushing their way to the front as they asked and demanded a picture of an autograph.
Your personal space was becoming smaller and smaller as they pushed through you, trying to separate you from your boyfriend’s grip. They bumped your shoulder and kicked your sides with elbows and frantic arms. You felt your voice getting drowned out as you called for Luke, hoping that he could hear you over the commotion and come help you out.
It all happened so fast. Luke let go of your hand by accident for just one second as he tried to look back at you. His heart shattered as he struggled to find your eyes in the crowd of pleas and flashing cameras “Y/N?!” He called, trying to appear calm in front of those strangers, but on the inside he was desperate, kicking himself over and over for ever letting go of your hand.
And then, he heard it “Luke!”
Your eyes were wide and filled with tears as people pushed through you to get to him. His eyes filled with regret as he sucked on a breath and walked towards you, easily making his way back as all of the people who were standing there stepped aside to let him through. No one pushed him, no one yelled at him for stepping into their place. No one dared to disrespect him as they disrespected you.
In a matter of seconds, Luke was standing in front of you, wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling you closer to him. You felt like you could breathe again.
“You okay?” He asked, mumbling as he kissed your head. You heard the faintest “aww” coming from the fans witnessing this little gesture and confusing with something cute instead of what it was: he was shielding you from them, protecting you while comforting you the best he could. Yet, all you could hear was Luke’s beating heart as you hid your face in his chest.
“Let’s get out of here,” Luke said, tensing his whole body as he pulled you to the side, not letting go of his grip to your waist as you walked rapidly towards the exit.
You both ignored the calls and flashed from your surroundings. You could feel your breathing becoming heavier as you tried to keep up with his steps, not really relaxing until you saw the van’s door opening and Calum making space for the both of you.
You jumped inside the car and Luke quickly followed, closing the door and letting out a breath he was holding.
“So…” Ashton said, breaking the silence after they drove away “That was fun. Nothing like a little chaos to start the tour”
For the first time in your life, you wanted to punch his face. Your heart was still beating loudly inside your chest and they were all so calm. It truly seemed like they didn’t care that you just went through one of the scariest experiences of your life.
Yeah, you know you might be exaggerating. But it’s your first flight with the boys, first time in a foreign country, first time with a multitude of fans and photographers where they all pushed you to get to your boyfriend. And they were all fine? Like it wasn’t a big deal? And they say it was fun?
The chattering continued, all three of them talking about the fans they saw and how they reacted to them. Joking around and teasing each other for various reasons. No one noticed how your hands were shaking or how you didn’t say a word since you got up in the car.
You tried to steady your breath and to hide your hands somewhere until they were cool. You still feel a sting where one girl elbowed you, knowing it might leave a bruise. You tried to close your eyes and think about nice things to get you off your mind for a while, but all you could see was how Luke drifted away from you, going farther and farther as you lost sight of him; and no matter how hard you yelled his name, your voice was drowned and lost among all the others.
The tears started to pick up in your eyes and you held them back as hard as you could. You needed to be strong, this is just the first stop of the tour and you needed to toughen up if you want to keep up. You just hoped you could do it before anyone noticed it.
Luke was sitting beside you, not participating in the conversation of his bandmates, but rather he was looking at you and how your leg bounced up and down in a rapid motion.
He knew your mind must be going ten miles per hour at this moment. You weren’t used to this whole lifestyle and for that to be your first experience must be nerve-wracking. He wished he could just erase all those bad feelings and bring you the comfort you deserve.
“Hey,” He finally said, softly enough for you to hear as he leaned closer to you. Your eyes quickly snapped in his direction, finding some kind of peace in his baby blue eyes “Are you okay?”
He knew the answer was no, but he also knew you would never admit that, so it was no surprise when you smiled at him and nodded. Only this time the smile didn’t reach your eyes like they always do.
“You know just… a bit tired, that’s all,” You said, not wanting to worry him. But it was a little bit late for that and you noticed that the instant he furrowed his brows and gave you the ‘I know you’re lying’ look.
“Are you sure? Because that out there was pretty crazy and-“
“I’m fine, Luke” You reassured him, scooting closer to him and leaning against his frame. He immediately rounded his arm around your shoulder and started drawing circles on your skin with his thumb “I don’t really want to talk about it right now. I just need you close for a while, is that okay?”
Luke sighed and held you tighter “Yeah, of course, love. Whatever you need. You should try to get some sleep, I’m sorry we couldn’t buy you anything to eat back in the airport”
You look around you. All the boys were singing and joking around, not paying attention to you and Luke; making it difficult for you to just drift back to sleep.
“No, don’t worry. I’m okay. I’ll eat and sleep when we get to the hotel”
You watched the scenery pass by as the car drove you to your destination. You tried to focus on the conversations going around you, but you were too distracted by the beauty of it all.
It amazed you how after such a scary experience could come such comfort; you were surrounded by your best friends and your lover, experiencing new things and memories you knew you needed to treasure forever.
From time to time you could feel Luke staring at you, almost like he wanted to make sure you were okay and you would reassure him with soft smiles and little pecks on the cheeks as the other guys reminisced about their previous times abroad.
Suddenly, the car came to a stop and you found yourselves parked in a huge parking lot. You looked at Luke with a confused expression and he did the same. You didn’t know where you were.
“Uh, why are we stopping?” He asked as Calum and Ashton opened their doors and stepped out of the van.
“Because we are here?” Michael asked, not getting his friend’s confusion.
“This is the hotel?” You asked.
“This is the venue…” Michael said, pulling a lever so he could push Calum’s seat out of the way and step outside “We are not going to the hotel till tonight”
“What?!” Luke half asked, half yelled.
“Yeah, dude. We’re behind schedule so we need to do a quick soundcheck and then hop in the car and go do a couple of interviews in radio stations… did you not read the email?”
Luke facepalmed himself “No…” He lamented as he rubbed his face with the palm of his hand, then he looked at you with apologetic eyes “Oh my god, Y/N. I’m so sorry, love”
“It’s okay, Luke” It was not okay, you really wanted to take a nap and a shower before the show. But you couldn’t have avoided this at any cost and it wasn’t his fault at all, so there was no need to bring him down because of this.
“No! Of course, it’s not okay. You need to rest and eat a proper meal. This is it fair to you and I’m so sorry”
You could tell that he was kicking himself inside his head and you hated to see him all worked up and anxious. It broke your heart to see him so frustrated with himself.
Your palms cupped his face and made him look at you “Luke, baby. It’s fine, I promise. It will be fun! Plus, I can always nap on the couch” But he didn’t look conceived at all “I’ll be fine”
He sighed “Promise you will eat something there? And drink some water?”
You nodded with a smile “I promise. Now go! You have a soundcheck to kill” You winked at him and pecked his lips before jumping out of the van.
“What would I do without you?”
*
After the quick soundcheck, the boys changed clothes and got ready for an afternoon filled with interviews and quick appearances. It was going to be a wild ride, so you opted out of staying in the venue until they got back.
“Are you sure you’ll be okay?” Luke asked for the tenth time.
“Of course she will!” Intervened Ashton “She’s Y/N/N, she can take care of herself”
You rolled your eyes at him and stared back at your boyfriend “I’ll be fine, love. I’ll just stay right here and maybe I’ll take a nap”
“And you know where the catering room is?”
You certainly didn’t, but he didn’t need to know that right now. You would manage well enough.
“Yes, dad” You teased
“Y/N!” Luke mocked a shocked expression “Not in front of the boys!”
You scoffed and lightly pushed him in the chest “You pig! Not everything has to be dirty!”
“You started it!”
“Go!” You laughed, kissing him one last time “Give your fans some content”
You saw the four of them walk through the door and you let out an exhausted breath. This is the first time you allowed yourself to relax since you boarded the plane almost 24 hours ago and you were beyond tired at this point.
How did they do it? Fly across the world and still look like superstars, what kind of deal did they make, and with whom?
You looked around the green room, your eyes landing on your reflection. You physically cringed at the image in front of you; dark heavy bags rested under your eyes and your hair, although pulled back, seemed oily and tangled in knots; your clothes had wrinkles in them and you seriously regretted sending your luggage directly to the hotel, leaving you with this shirt, a hoodie, and your black jeans.
A sigh escaped your lips as you tried to think of nice things; things that would keep your mind out of overthinking every single detail that has gone wrong since the minute you left home. How were you supposed to prove that you belong on the tour if you couldn’t even handle the first day? You needed to gain your energy back before the guys came back, and what better medicine than a little nap?
You moved Ashton’s heavy bag from one corner of the couch and laid on your back, but the awaited relief never came. You tossed and turned in different positions, hissing every time the warm leather glued itself to your skin only for it to be peeled off with every movement.
The sounds from outside of the room grew louder as the crew hurried to put everything in its place on time for the show. People were running in and outside the green room, not paying attention to you laying on the couch trying to find an ounce of sleep as they focused on their tasks.
You don’t know how long it’s been and, honestly, you’re afraid to ask. It was clear that you were not going to get any sleep here, not while everyone’s acting frantic because of a scheduling mishap and not while your mind is still preoccupied trying to keep up instead of relaxing as Luke told you to do.
You tried one last time to get at least a five-minute nap, but it was almost impossible. You opened your eyes with a groan and got up, so frustrated that you didn’t even feel the burn on your skin when you separated yourself from the uncomfortable couch.
The second your feet touched the ground and you lifted yourself on your feet, everything started to spin. You felt how your blood seemed to have disappeared from your body, leaving only a carcass that couldn’t stand for itself, making you fall on your ass back into the couch.
You felt nauseous, but the growling in your stomach reminded you that you haven’t eaten in all day. You had to eat something before you passed out, but the mere thought of eating made you feel even dizzier if that was possible.
You counted to ten, ignoring the way your head pounded with loud warnings and stood up. It took you a few seconds to find your balance again, but once you started walking you felt like you couldn’t stop.
You got out of the room, not really knowing where the catering was but you were determined to get there. You couldn’t let Luke and the rest see you like that, so weak and pathetic. It’s just day one and you are already passing out? How stupid is that!
The loud bangs in your head increased with every step you took, soon becoming voices that screamed inside your mind, drowning every ounce of clarity you might have; turning to the right and then to the left, then to the end of the hallway and back to the right. Did you even know where you were going?
Did you even know why you were here?
It was bound to happen, sooner or later, that Luke would ask you to accompany him on tour. Bet he is regretting that decision now. You tried, you really tried to be the supporting girlfriend, but how could you be of any support when you were the one who needed it? He didn’t come here to be your nanny and yet all he’s done is worry about you! You should be able to take care of yourself, yet you can’t even do that for him.
What a terrible girlfriend you were. He will surely break up with you and send you back home on the next flight. He didn’t need this kind of energy, this cloud of darkness you were becoming, ready to drown out his light with your problems. If only you could do better for him. For Luke.
Luke, the simple thought of him brought you to the brink of tears. You loved him so much, so much that it hurt to love him yet at the same time it was the best comfort in the world just to be standing by his side. You wanted to be by his side and never let go, but you were pushing away from him. Your mind and meaningless needs were separating you from him, telling you that he deserves someone better, more equipped to handle the lifestyle you weren’t ready for.
He is the brightest star in the universe and you are just a firefly, trying hard to be something you’d never be and everyone can see it. The fans see it, the media sees it and even your friends will someday. They will realize that you were nothing more than a girl who just hoped she could be enough but ended up becoming one more burden to carry with.
You couldn’t survive out here, not right now, and not without Luke. You are falling and you feel like if you stay you might drown him with you. You were disappointing him right now, pacing around the-
Where the fuck were you?
The voice inside your head died down as you didn’t recognize the place where you were standing.
You were supposed to be on your way to catering, and you were… but you didn’t know where it was and now you don’t know where you are.
Great.
The screams of the fans reverberated through the walls of the narrow hallway, you only now realize that the doors must be open and the show is about to start. You brought a hand to your back pocket, thinking about calling Luke and telling him your situation and asking him how to get to where they were. But your pockets were flat and your phone was nowhere to be seen, you must’ve left it in the greenroom.
“Fuck!” You yelled, voice hoarse from not having drunk anything since this morning. You looked to your left and there was just a blank wall staring back at you with no way out. You thought about going back, but you weren’t paying attention to where you were heading, so you risked the fact of getting more lost before someone could find you.
Fuck it.
You turned around and started walking, faster and faster. You were almost jogging through the deserted hallways trying to find your way back. You were panicking with every turn, every curve. To the right, then left, then a left, and a right again. You could hear the faintest riff of a guitar, so you speed up your pace. Your exhaustion had nothing compared to the fear in the pit of your stomach, you needed to get back. You needed to be there for Luke, to find your way back.
The desperation you held inside made you ignore the tears that were spilling out of your eyes without permission. You didn’t want to be alone anymore in a place you don’t know. You are sure your mind is playing tricks on you, making the hallways longer and the seconds everlasting, constantly repeating in your head how you were nothing more than a little lost girl who was playing something she shouldn’t. Something she wouldn’t ever be.
People passed you as you turned around corners, your heart beating loud as you recognized some faces from the crew, getting closer and closer to where you were supposed to be.
And finally, you arrived.
You let out a breath, you didn’t know if it was from relief or just a way to drown out the sob that was threatening to come out. You made a move to open the door but you noticed your hands were shaking. A cold feeling ran through your body, making you shiver as you wiped your sweaty palms on the front of your jeans. You were so close but why did you feel so far away? Drifting and drifting further and further….
What was happening?
“Y/N?”
You heard your name being called by a familiar voice. You lifted your head and saw Michael standing at the door of the green room, his eyes scanning you carefully. You swore you could see a hint of fear in them. He quickly moved out of the way, opening the door wider so you could step in.
You lifted your gaze, your teary eyes meeting Luke’s as he stood in the middle of the room, pacing back and forward with his phone in his hand, gripping it so tightly you thought it might crack.
“There you are!” He said, pressing a button on his screen. He was smiling, relief visible on his features as his eyes took you in “I’ve been looking for you, the opening band already started playing and- Y/N?”
Suddenly, everything stopped. Luke’s eyes denoted fear as he saw you collapse to your knees the moment you stepped into the room. He saw everything happen in slow motion: the way you wrapped your arms around your stomach; the shaking of your entire frame as you let out a heavy breath mixed with a sob; and the tears in your eyes as you tried to make sense of what was happening to you.
He acted fast. In one swift move, he was kneeling in front of you, taking you in his arms as he pulled you closer to his chest “She’s having a panic attack!” He said, loud enough for everyone in the room to hear, but none of his friends moved as they were still shocked by the image of you falling into the ground.
“Michael!” He called, remembering that people act better in an emergency if given direct orders “Go find a doctor. Ashton, bring her something to eat. And Calum, find water and soda. She’s dehydrated and needs some sugar”
All three of them didn’t think twice before jumping out of their seats and running through the halls to find those things for you. But you couldn't hear any of that.
“I’m sorry,” You cried, over and over again “I’m sorry, I’m sorry!”
“Shh, love” Luke cooed, lifting you and sitting back down on the couch, placing you on his lap as he rocked you back and forwards “It’s okay love. Nothing to be sorry for, I’m here. I’m here”
You kept crying into his chest, struggling to breathe as every sob seemed to tear your throat in two. You knew Luke was touching you, but you couldn’t feel his hands anywhere as you shook through your cries.
“Baby- Y/N, listen to me. Okay?” He said with a calming voice, completely contrasting how he was feeling inside “Listen to my voice, baby. Breathe with me, okay? One,” He inhaled deeply, his finger tracing a line up your back so you could follow him “Two” He exhaled, bringing his finger down “Good, do that again, please? One, two”
He was trying so hard not to panic along with you. Seeing you so frail in his arms made his heart break into a million pieces. He didn’t know what was going on in your mind or why or what you were apologizing for. All he knows is that he would do anything not to hear your broken cries again, so desperate and hopeless. He would do anything to make sure you are alright and safe.
You imitated Luke’s breathing pattern as close as you could. Breathing in and out every time he asked until you could feel his finger running up and down your spine, his touch finally bringing some comfort to your body and mind as they recognized him. They recognized home.
Your cries died down the moment Michael stepped through the door accompanied by a nurse, Ashton, and Calum who all brought some type of food and drink to lay down on the table.
Luke made some space so the nurse could sit down next to you, but he never once let go of you or stopped moving his finger on your back. He needed you to know that he was still here and he was not going anywhere.
“She seems good,” The nurse said after quickly giving you a check-up “It was just a panic attack. You did well in calming her down” He said to Luke, giving him a pat on the back “I’m gonna leave here some pills for her to take once she eats and drinks something, these will help with the body ache and headache she will feel later and also will help her sleep”
The four men thanked the nurse as Michael closed the door again. All eyes were fixed on you as you rested your head on Luke’s shoulder, eyes closed as your breathing became even and lighter again.
“Is that-? Is that a half-eaten burger?” Calum asked, pointing to the table filled with foods and drinks, and breaking the silence that had set upon them.
“I panicked!” Ashton answered.
“Could you guys give us a moment, please?” Luke asked, eyes never leaving your face as he held you closer. His friends nodded and walked out of the room, leaving the two of you alone.
“I’m sorry, bub,” You said, voice broken and soft.
You slowly opened your eyes and suddenly felt like crying again when you met Luke’s gaze. Surprised at the fact that he didn’t seem angry; all you could see in his eyes was a relief.
“Why are you sorry, love?” He asked, voice as soft as yours as he caressed your cheeks with the back of his free hand “You have nothing to apologize for. These things happen and we can’t really avoid them”
“No,” You said, pushing away from him as you separated from his lap and went to sit on the spot next to him.
Luke’s heart broke at your actions, but it completely shattered when he saw the tears picking up in your eyes again.
“I’m sorry for ruining everything” Your voice broke as you started talking “I’m sorry for being one more burden in this tour that hasn’t even started yet. Look at me! Not even a day in and I’m already falling apart! This is not what you expected of me, Luke and don’t try to deny it. I’ve disappointed you, the band, myself-”
“You did not do such a thing” He tried to say, but you weren’t listening.
“Maybe I’m not meant for this” Your words took his breath right out of his mouth, he didn’t like where this conversation was going “Maybe I’m better off at home. At least there I’m not embarrassing myself in airports or with your fans or with your bandmates and crew- I want to be someone you would be proud of but all I do is overthink every little thing that I forget the rest. I tried so hard to keep up, to prove to you and the others and even myself that I could belong here on tour; that I could live this life with ease as you all do and I just keep failing everyone. I love you, Luke. But I can’t stand the thought of slowing you or pulling you down with me, and you don’t deserve to be tied up with some mess like me-”
Your words were cut off by Luke’s lips clashing with yours. It took you a minute to respond and kiss him back, letting all your worries slip away for only one minute. Only one minute where you could pretend that everything was alright.
Luke pulled away first, placing his forehead against yours “You uplift me, Y/N”
“What?”
He cupped your cheeks, making you look at him as he spoke with such care and love.
“You could never bring me down, you are the one keeping me above the water, my love. I deserve to be with you as much as you deserve to be right here with us”
“Luke-”
“It’s my fault,” He said with a sad voice, you opened your mouth to say something but he beat you to it “Don’t try to deny it, Y/N. It’s true. I should’ve prepared you more for what was coming instead of throwing you into the lion's den without a single warning. I knew from the moment I saw your face in the crowd back at the airport that I had failed you, not the other way around. But you stayed, you pulled through and told me that it was okay when it clearly wasn’t. Y/N, you are stronger than any of us and much more caring and loving… I’m so proud of you and that I get to call you to mine that sometimes I can’t even believe it”
He carefully wiped a tear from your cheek, his heart fluttering with joy at seeing you smile back at him “I love you. And if you say that you are not ready for this, then I will book you a flight tonight. I don’t want to see you in pain, my love, even if you try to hide it. I couldn’t stand the thought of being the one who breaks you” He took a moment, thinking over his words “But if you decide to stay. I promise you I will make every single minute of it worth it. I’ll protect you better. I’ll do my best to take care of you the same way you take care of me. You’re my angel, Y/N. And I need you close”
Tears were falling down your eyes again as you pulled him closer into a hug. Luke quickly swung your legs over his lap and held you as tight as he could, almost fearing that you would slip off his embrace if he ever let you go.
You could hear him mumbling something as he rocked the two of you back and forwards again, this time to comfort you both. You pulled your head slightly from his chest so you could hear him better, he was singing the words from “Still”, your favorite Niall Horan’s song.
”Oh, we'll be alright
Oh, it'll be alright”
You always loved when he sang to you, always bringing you the sense of peace you so much needed.
But as you cuddled closer you noticed that not only was he singing, but you could also hear the guitar, the melody, the crowd…
Luke noticed your confusion and chuckled “I asked the opener to cover this song for us; for you. Wanted to surprise you on your first day”
You swore your smile couldn’t get bigger if you tried. Your eyes filled with tears as you chuckled “Well,” You said, sniffing as you knocked your forehead to his “I can’t wait to see what other surprises you got for the rest of the tour”
Luke’s eyes sparkled with the happiness of a little boy on Christmas day “You’re staying?”
You nodded “As long as you want me to”
“Forever, then” He smiled before connecting your lips with his once again. Letting go of all your worries, for all you could feel was love.
*
The concert was going great. You were convinced this was their best show up to date, but you were saying that since the tour began two months ago.
Luke stayed true to his promise of making everyday worth it. Although you knew that every day that you woke up next to him, whether it was in a bunk or a plane or a hotel bed, that it was worth more than enough. You were home, wherever you went, as long as you had him.
You smiled, laughed, and danced along with the songs on your side of the stage, looking proudly at your boyfriend who lived to do what he loved. But your favorite moment of the night was this; seconds before he started their next song, he would look for your eyes backstage and once he’s found you, he would smile at you and say.
“This is ‘Lover of mine’, everyone. Sing with your heart”
*
Tags : @iknowyouthinkimbulletproof @mystic-232 @talksoprettyjjx @theshyspy @sarcasticallywitty15 @hoodhoran @flaneurcth @notinthesameguey @bubblegum18 @myloverboyash @nicebasscalum @calumspupils
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realbootyboobs · 3 years
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♡ if u feel this
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bucky-barnes-lover · 6 months
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Kinktober day 8: Dirty Talk
Moodboard. Luke Hemmings
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I feel like Luke would just have such a dirty mouth idk.
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5secondsof5sos · 1 year
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Also darling who would you like to see 5sos collaborate with musically and also what song would like to hear them cover. Me personally would love to hear them covered smooth by Rob Thomas and Carlos Santana
Hi friend🤍
this is such a great question! Thank you so much for asking!
they would sound AMAZING covering that music!
I’ve always been a fan of Michael’s sound and will always push to hear him sing more. Demi lovato’s on tour now and performing their older songs. Id love to see Michael sing lead on “don’t forget,” “la la land,” “skyscraper.” Imagine Michael singing “skyscraper” with that growl in his voice!! Imagine those live from the vault!!
id also love to hear michael cover my chemical romance. Michael always talks about my chemical romance and I know michael would do an amazing cover of black parade, I don’t love you, cancer, im not okay.
Luke would sound so amazing covering “wild thoughts” by dj khaled and Rihanna. Harry styles did a cover of this song and made it sounds like a classic rock song. If 5sos performed that it would sound amazing! Id also love to hear 5sos cover “yellow” by Coldplay. They’d sound amazing!
Ashton would sound amazing covering “you’ll be in my heart” by Phil Collins. And “son of man,” also by Phil Collins. I think their voices sound quite similar and 5sos would make a stunning arrangement of these songs!
Calum would sound amazing covering “mr bright side” by the killers. And it has such an amazing drum solo that Ashton would dominate. Ashton deserves more drum solos. Always.
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The Sweetest Taste
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AU Ice Cream Shop Featuring Cake for the 5sos fic event sponsored by @maluminspace and @h0tsos
Word Count: 5,979 (I’m a long winded bitch, oops)
CW: this is smut so 18+, NSFW etc. M/M and M/F oral as well as sexual situations and strong language from the outset and throughout.
Special thanks to @adoring-lrh for helping me edit this monstrosity.
Event Masterlist
"I'm so bored," Calum complained, leaning back against the counter. 
"Me too, but I have to train you how to close so you're not leaving early," you told him but you were just as bored as him. 
Your parents had recently expanded the family business by opening up a second Cali-Cone Dream location in the touristy "historic district" downtown. Your dad's grandparents started the ice cream shop after moving to California from Missouri after World War 2.  They'd invested their life savings in the shop and helped build the boardwalk. You’d grown up in this shop, and since it was early in the season and still slow, it was up to you to train the new hires. It was a pain in the ass, but at least your parents weren't breathing down your neck. 
"If you keep complaining I'll make you clean the freezer. You'll have shrinkage for a week," you teased him. 
"Like you wouldn't find a way to fix that," he shot back, wiggling his dark eyebrows at you. 
Calum was the only new hire you liked. Jeremy was a kiss ass to your parents, Rico was boring, and Amanda was dumber than a bag of hammers. The smartest thing to come out of that girl's mouth was her boyfriend's dick. You'd already told your Mom it wasn't going to work out when you'd asked her to cut lemons for tea and she came back with oranges. Calum, however, was funny, a quick learner, and great with customers, not to mention drop-dead gorgeous.
"How is it only 3 o clock? Can we play cards or something? If I stand here much longer I'm gonna keep eating ice cream, and this is supposed to be my hot girl summer," he pouted before giving you a saucy wink. He was a total flirt and you weren't complaining. Three weeks ago he'd barely said a word, but you two had become fast friends and he'd really come out of his shell. 
"I don't think you have to worry about that," you laughed.
 The dark blue, slightly too tight, uniform t-shirt accentuated his bulging biceps, broad chest, and golden brown tan. The Cali-Cone slogan, "The Thrill of the Taste" scrawled across his back in bright red letters kept giving you dirty thoughts. 
"We could close early, maybe show me another of your secret spots." Calum leaned towards you with a smirk and you rolled your eyes.
 A week ago you'd gotten tired of him whining that there was nothing to do now that the college bars were dead since most students went home for the summer. You'd taken him out with you after you closed up shop. You'd avoided the popular rowdy country bar, and the dark thumping underground hip hop club, choosing instead to head for the beach. You took him to a spot under the boardwalk past the large boulders known as "The Breakers" where the local police patrols usually stopped.
You brought your beach bag and a popup tent you could both lounge in so bugs wouldn't eat you alive. He'd managed to sweet talk a bottle of wine out of his landlady, who knew he was only 20. It wasn't very strong, but it made you giggly and warm. Perhaps Calum lounging next to you on the blanket had something to do with that.  After a few rosé flavored kisses his hands began to wander, and you had to put an end to it.  Calum started to apologize, but you told him that the only reason you stopped was that your cycle hadn’t ended yet. 
After that, Calum laid back on the blanket and began to talk.
He told you he was in his second year studying music composition and theory at the Strozzi Conservatory. He'd recently broken up with his high school sweetheart, and it had been painful. As a result Cal decided to not go home for the summer, deciding instead to take a workshop on-campus teaching local teens. He was a bit lonely but looking forward to the tourist season.
"This is the first time I've had time to myself where I don't have to worry about what anyone else thinks about me or what I do," he told you, taking a gulp before handing you the wine to finish off. You were sitting up and he was laying across your outstretched legs looking up at you.
"Ooh the wild college years," you laughed. You had seen many sheltered middle-class suburban kids get the first taste of freedom away from their helicopter parents and lose their minds. "If you're trying to get fucked up don't buy anything on the boardwalk. I've got a friend so at least you know it's clean." 
"Nah not like that, but good to know." Calum took a deep breath, looked up at you, and then away. The shadows from the small camp lantern made him look mysterious and brooding. "Can I tell you something? I feel like I can trust you." His voice was soft and he rolled on his side concentrating on tracing lines along the skin on your legs. 
"You can tell me anything," you assured him.
"I want to--uh I guess experiment with different sorts of types of experiences with something new. I mean, obviously new. What I mean is, not what you'd expect maybe. Shit!" Calum rubbed his eyes and you held back a smile. "What I'm trying to say is that," he paused again.
"Calum, are you into guys?" You ask, not wanting to rush, but you were running out of time. You only had about half an hour before the tide would start coming in and you had to leave. 
"Is it obvious?" He asked, his eyes wide. 
"Nope, I wouldn't have guessed at all, but I've had this conversation with a friend before. I'm glad you trusted me enough to tell me, but we have to leave here in a bit." You checked your phone.
“So that’s it?” he asked. 
“Dude, it’s not that serious. Tell me who you’re scoping out and I’ll let you know what’s up. That doesn’t mean we can’t have fun as well,” you told him.
He looked so relieved, and you could only imagine what it took for him to tell you that.
Calum sat up and you started rolling up the blanket. You packed up your beach bag and Calum held the lantern as you twisted and folded the tent in three quick fluid motions before sliding it into its bag. 
"How did you do that so quickly in the dark?" Calum looked impressed.
"Practice, now come on, follow me, watch your step. It's slippery," you cautioned him.
It had gotten chilly and you were both shivering as you ran back to your car. 
"You won't tell anyone at work will you? I know it's not a big deal but I don't want everyone in my business." Calum bit his lip and you could tell he was questioning his decision.
"Dude you're fine, but what made you decide to tell me?" The question slipped out before you realized it.
He looked embarrassed and rubbed the back of his neck. "I was hoping maybe you could help me out. I don't know how to read people and I don't want to make an idiot out of myself." 
"Of course," you replied, reaching over to squeeze his hand. “Did you have anyone in mind?”
“Well there’s this lifeguard. He’s blonde and has a bird tattoo on his arm,” Calum told you. 
You cringed, knowing exactly who he was talking about. “Sorry sweetie,” you replied, “ that’s Cody and he’s not only straight, he’s a complete jackass.”
Calum slumped and looked defeated. “Don’t worry sweetie,” you reassured him. “The summer is just getting started”
A clap of thunder pulled you from your daydream.  If it was going to rain there was no chance business would pick up. You glanced over at Calum perched on the stool behind the cash register playing on his phone. His dark curls were falling across his forehead and your fingers itched to play with his hair. Being bored and horny was never fun and you were willing to bet Calum could take care of both. As if he could read your mind Cal looked up and caught your eye. The smirk that spread across his face let you know you were being too obvious, but you didn't care. 
"If you keep looking at me like that I might forget I'm on the clock,"  Calum licked his lips and looked you over. "You're lucky there are cameras."
"Oh yeah? What did you have in mind? It just so happens I know all the spots the cameras can't see," you raise your eyebrows at him, challenging him to take it further. 
The loud jingle of the bells hanging from the door startled both of you. You look up to see a familiar figure ducking through the door just before the sky opened up and began pouring rain. 
"What's up Luke? Since when are you afraid to get wet," you teased the tall blonde walking towards the counter. You'd known Luke Hemmings for years, his dad was on the city council with yours and his mom taught sixth grade. He'd been a year ahead of you in school, and you'd both played varsity basketball in high school. He'd dated several of your friends, and before that, your older sister had a tumultuous relationship with his brother Ben several years back. 
"Maybe I'm sick of the pool and want my old job back," Luke shot back. He'd worked three summers scooping ice cream next to you until he turned 18 and could work as a lifeguard on the beach. 
"Sorry, dollface, I've managed to replace you, I even found someone better looking," you replied. 
The Hemmings brothers were gorgeous and always had girls falling at their feet, but you'd never been that impressed. Not that it stopped y'all from hooking up on occasion, including once in the walk-in cooler after closing the summer before your senior year. It was a small town and you'd dated, hated, or hooked up with most of the guys your age.  Luke's history was more extensive than yours. He'd not only hooked up with you and many of your female friends, but you'd kissed many of the same boys. 
He looked from you to Calum who was standing to your right suddenly engrossed in the patterns on the tile floor. You could see the flush on his cheeks and his leg was jiggling nervously. Luke looked Calum up and down, his blue eyes lingering on the younger man before shooting you an approving grin. 
"I see you found a college boy. Can't say I blame you, much better looking than that ginger from last year," Luke snickered.
"I'm gonna go check the cooler," Calum told you, barely audibly before ducking in the back. 
You looked at Luke who was as confused as you were before excusing yourself to follow Calum. 
You barely made it around the corner before Calum popped out at you nearly scaring you to death. 
"What the hell," you squealed as he pulled you into the freezer.
"That's the guy I was telling you about," he hissed as the door shut behind you.
"What are you talking about?" 
"Remember when you drove me home the other night? You asked if I had anyone in mind so you could find out which team they played for," his voice was a panicked whisper, and his dark eyes were wide as saucers.
Then it clicked. "You were talking about Luke?" I asked, my voice louder than I meant for it to be.
"Why are you yelling? Yes, obviously that's him, except you told me his name was Dylan."
"You said tall, curly hair, with a bird tattooed on his arm. Luke doesn't have any tattoos, his mom
hates them," I replied, but doubted myself now. I hadn't seen Luke in ages, he'd always been a spoiled Mama's boy and maybe Liz finally caved.  
"That tall drink of water has a hummingbird tattooed on his arm, but that's not important right now. Have y'all hooked up?" You nodded and Calum scowled. "Figures he would be straight," he sighed.
Your brain finally caught up to the situation at hand, and you had an idea. 
"Listen to me Calum, you're gonna wait on him. Offer him a strawberry waffle cone, it's his favorite," you pushed him out of the cooler and back towards the front. 
You popped your head around the corner and whistled making Luke look up from his phone. "I'll be out in a second. I keep telling Dad this freezer needs replaced, have one on the house, but try not to scare off my new employee please," you shoot him a stern look as Calum came around the corner behind you. 
"I'll try not to bite, but I make no promises," Luke laughed before turning his attention to Calum. 
You moved just out of their sight, but still within earshot to see if your little plan worked. 
"So uh, yeah, the boss said you could have a free waffle cone. She said you like strawberry ice cream," Calum started out a squeak but he cleared his throat and continued, in a deep rough tone that gave you the shivers.
"Did she now?" Luke's voice dripped honey and you could hear him smiling. "I'm surprised she remembered, but she's good like that." 
"That's why she's the boss," Calum was cautious, and you stifled a laugh. "Have y'all known each other long? Are you close?"  
"Oh we know each other very well, and we've been close, very close sometimes. She's easy to talk to, I'm sure you know how it is," Luke answered and you had to put your hand over your mouth to hold back a laugh. You'd recognize that syrupy flirtatious tone anywhere, it was obvious Luke was seducing your new employee. You peeked around the counter to see Calum handing Luke his ice cream cone. A double scoop, perfectly dipped, pink and creamy, just barely starting to drip around the edge you watched Luke begin to lap it up while keeping his eyes on Calum.  
The power flickered as Luke leaned back against one of the tables in the dining area, half sitting half standing, his long legs crossed at the ankle. He was wearing the black swim trunks trimmed in bright red every lifeguard wore on duty and a thin white reflective windbreaker unzipped almost all the way to his waist revealing his broad bare chest. You could see Calum fidgeting nervously with the ice cream scoop while trying not to stare. Luke was not making that easy, his lips and tongue working obscenely in a way that was starting to make you horny, and you knew what he was doing and why. Poor Calum didn't stand a chance. It didn't help that he'd worn basketball shorts to work and the clingy fabric made his arousal obvious even where you were standing. 
You stepped back trying to figure out your next step. Your intention had been to introduce Luke and Calum but watching them together made your thoughts wander places they shouldn't. The rain was really coming down, sheeting the windows and sounding like pebbles being hurled against the roof. Daylight had turned dark as the storm really kicked up. You could hear the guys talking as you checked the weather on your phone. You were stuck here at least another 30 minutes as a big blob of red on the radar moved through your area. 
"She said I dare you to kiss the person on either side of you, and I didn't know if I wanted to kill her or kiss her." You heard Luke's voice and realized you'd zoned out and you headed back towards the front. 
You stepped through the swinging doors just in time to hear Calum ask, "why was that?" 
"Because the girl to his left was my friend who was absolutely gagging for Luke's cock," you answered as Calum jumped and Luke laughed.
"What was her name? Crystal? Kristen?" Luke bit the tip of the waffle cone off and sucked the remainder of the ice cream out of the bottom, glancing at you before his eyes returned to Calum. 
"Kirsten, you did end up sleeping with her, " you reminded him. "Tell him who was on the other side."
Luke licked his lips and grinned. "Keeeerstin, that's right, and that 4th of July we all did crazy things if I remember correctly. To my right however was the hottest soccer player in school who I'd had a crush on for ages." 
Calum nodded and Luke's gaze flickered your way once again, his blue eyes bright and mischievous, before he continued, "I was freaking out when we kissed but then he ended up taking me back to his house and we fooled around on his sister's swing set." 
You laughed along with Luke as you watched Calum realize what Luke said. His head snapped up, blinking rapidly and his mouth opened and closed refusing to find words before you saw him look at you, then Luke, and then back to you as everything clicked into place.
"Is that what strawberry ice cream meant? Were you setting me up?" Calum asked.
"Not a setup, but wanted to see if Luke remembered the code. Turns out there's not as dumb as he looks," you walked up to Calum stopping just inches from his chest looking up at him. "And you did say you were bored." 
"What did you have in mind?" He raised his eyebrows at you, still unable to look at Luke. 
“I mean, Luke likes strawberry ice cream, and so do you. I doubt we’re going to have many customers with this rain,” you told him. 
“They closed down the beach because of lightning so no one is coming out,” Luke chimed in. 
“That’s what I was thinking, so it sounds to me like the three of us have some time on our hands,” you replied. You looked at Calum and he nodded but his eyes burned into you.
“Are you sure you’re up for that?” he asked apparently reading your thoughts. 
“I can handle anything,” you puffed your chest out and heard Luke snicker, but you didn’t dare take your eyes off Calum.
“I’m down if y’all are,” he challenged, finally looking at Luke. 
Am I really going to do this? Your thoughts were racing and your heart was pounding as hard as the rain. CAMERAS you thought before remembering you'd been the one who updated the security system and there was a workaround.
Thunder crashed so loudly you felt it shake your bones. No one would come around today, and it made no sense to stay open or send Luke home in this storm. 
"Calum, go make sure the back door is locked, Luke if you could flip the bolt and get the blinds," you told them before you ran back into the office where money was counted. Behind the desk was the breaker box and you flipped the switch that shut off the security cameras and half the lights. 
You poked your head out at Luke and motioned for him to follow you towards the back. You bumped into Calum as he came back towards the front.
"Where are you going?" He asked
"Break room, even with this storm I'm worried about someone peeking in," you reply.
"Really?" Calum was skeptical.
"Around here you never know," Luke told him.
You flipped the light switch, but only two bulbs lit up casting the room in soft blue light with long shadows. 
"So I hear you got a tattoo, Hemmings," you said, trying to break the ice. Calum looked even more nervous than you felt, and you silently asked Luke to take charge. 
He winked at you unzipping his jacket and shrugging it off his shoulders. You noticed he was still lean and lanky but he'd definitely filled out, added some muscle definition. Sure enough, there on his right bicep was a small hummingbird. 
"I can't believe Liz finally caved," you teased.
"Honestly I just went and did it, and then dealt with the consequences. She's still mad, but nothing I can't handle," he replied. Luke looked over towards Calum. "You have way more than I ever will, can I see them?" 
Calum nodded and came up beside you. He started off nervous, but as he explained his tattoos starting with his parents’ initials on his hands, working up past his wrists, to the lovely bird with his sister's name, he explained when and where he'd gotten them. Some, like the thistle on his left bicep, had special meaning relating to friends and family. While others, like the spade and the horseshoe, were aesthetic choices. 
"Is that it?" Luke raised his eyebrows and bit his lip. 
"Nope," Calum smirked, warming to the other's man's attention. He reached behind his neck and in one swift motion pulled his shirt off over his head. You felt your pulse quicken and heard Luke suck in his breath next to you. Calum was brawnier, broad-chested with black ink on brown skin. Without realizing it you reached out to touch him, trailing a fingertip along what looked like a feather etched underneath his collarbone.
"What's this?" You asked, feeling your insides quiver when he turned his brown eyes towards you. 
"It's a silver fern, my mom's Maori from New Zealand," Calum's voice was a sultry whisper.
"And this?" Your fingers slide down to the "Choose Life" on his chest.
"It's from Trainspotting and- OH," Calum moaned as you absentmindedly tugged his nipple.
"Do that again," Luke told you, his hand sliding down over his dick now a bulge in his black and red lifeguard trunks. 
You tugged, harder this time, and were rewarded with a sound somewhere between a moan and a hiss. Calum licked his lips before his mouth hung slightly open as your fingers traveled to the other one, repeating the motion. Both men moaned in response and Calum noticed Luke palming himself through his shorts.
"Enjoying the show?" He asked with a slight smirk.
"Oh my God yes," Luke responded, squeezing his cock slightly. "All I can think about is the two of you sucking me off." 
"I'm down for that," you reply. "What do you say Cal." 
Uncertainty crept into his expression and he paused, "I want to but I've never done that before."
"If you want I can show you," you offered, the idea had you excited like never before. 
"Is that ok?" Calum asked.
Luke's blue eyes went wide. "Fuck yes, please," he whispered.
You untied the drawstring on Luke's shorts and tugged them down past his hips letting his long cock spring free. Rock hard and leaking as you wrapped your hand around the shaft, you could feel his body react to your touch. You stood on your tiptoes and playfully kissed his lips before you sank to your knees in front of him. 
You looked up at Calum who was watching your intently, lips pursed in concentration. 
"You know what you like so start there. Personally I like to tease a bit to start off," you tell him, flicking your tongue around the tip. "You wanna keep it wet and keep it moving. I think spitting is gross but if you gag a little it gets everything nice and sloppy." You took Luke's cock in your mouth getting it slick and shiny as you bobbed your head, taking him further down your throat each time until your nose was almost touching his belly. 
"Oh shit," you heard Luke's growl above you as you came back up for air. You continued pumping him with your hand as you looked up at Calum. 
"Come on, you try," you beckoned to him. 
Calum was eager now, as he kneeled next to you, looked up at Luke, and wrapped his hand around your much smaller one as you stroked Luke's cock together. 
"Oh God," Luke moaned, the sight almost sending him over the edge. 
Calum leaned forward and brushed his lips against the taut skin before his tongue darted out to get his first taste. Luke's knees started to buckle and he leaned back against the break table which was inches behind his thighs. Calum hesitated, eyeing the table before glancing at you, but both you and Luke knew the table could easily hold his weight. 
"It's fine, keep going," you pulled back and gave his arm a nudge.
"Are you sure? I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I have no idea what I’m doing. I almost never do,” he replied.
"You're sucking a dick not disarming a bomb, just don't bite and you'll be fine," you told him with a giggle.
Calum swirled his tongue around the tip and you saw Luke grip the table's edge, his knuckles white. Calum began sucking, softly, and slowly before gaining confidence he built up a rhythm. Luke grunted, his eyes screwed shut and his chest heaved.
"Stop," he pleaded, "you're gonna make me cum too fast." 
Calum pulled back with a pop. "I thought that was the point,"  he smirked up at the older man.
"God what I wouldn't give to let you both take turns riding me," Luke moaned, grasping his cock tightly, fighting for control. 
"What's wrong Luke?" You reached up and ran your thumb along Calum's plump bottom lip. "His pretty mouth got you all excited. Thinking about how you're the first guy he's ever sucked off? About how lucky you are?
"You keep talking like that and you're gonna make me cum in my pants," Calum warned you.
"Not yet, I wanna help with that," Luke growled. 
"We gotta finish you first," Calum grinned and got back to work. Luke cursed loudly as his cock disappeared down the other man's throat. Calum stopped and almost pulled back but kept going. 
You looked up at Luke, he was staring down at the two of you with half-open eyes. You reached up and cupped his balls, giving them a gentle tug. That sent him over the edge.
"Oh shit I'm gonna come," Luke yelled, bucking his hips. Calum tried to swallow but he started coughing so he leaned back, cum dripping from his chin and splattering on his chest. You watched Luke fight to keep his eyes on Calum before they rolled back in his head as his knees shook and his breath escaped him in ragged gasps. 
He sank to the floor next to the two of you watching as you pulled Calum in for a kiss tasting Luke on his lips. When you broke away, Luke was there kissing you first and then Calum. 
"That was so good, let us take care of you now. I bet you're ready to burst. Let's see what we're working with here," he said as he reached into Calum's shorts. You both smiled as Luke pulled out a cock that was a bit shorter but thicker than Luke's. 
"Damn Cal, you've been holding out on me," you purred in his ear as you moved behind him. 
"I would've fucked you that night on the beach if you'd let me," he admitted.
"I was indisposed, but we'll have to make up for that," you tell him before you kissed your way up his neck.
"Raise up a bit," Luke told him as he pulled his shorts up before laying on the carpet. He positioned his head just under Calum's balls blowing on them as you reached around and massaged Calum's cock. "This is gonna be all I think about tomorrow at work. I'm gonna be rock hard sitting up in that chair just thinking about what I wanna do to the two of you." 
A huge thunderclap seems to shake the building and the lights flickered as your lips found Calum's neck as you nipped at his skin. You'd been fantasizing about marking up his throat and couldn't resist leaving a mark. He whined in response and pushed back into you before moaning as Luke's mouth went to work getting Calum's cock nice and wet before sucking and humming on his balls. You continued to suck tiny bruises on Calum's flesh as Luke's mouth stayed busy alternating between working over Calum and talking dirty. 
"I'd love to watch you fuck her before I come up behind you and take that ass. Imagine being between us, having your cock buried in her pussy while you're stretched and full," Luke told him and the idea gave you the most delicious thrill. The idea of Luke fucking Calum into you had you aching for your own release, but right now you wanted to make Calum feel good. You twisted your hand slightly as you stroked his cock.  Calum's head rolled back resting on your shoulder, moaning over and over as you kept one hand on his dick and the other tugged his nipples. You couldn't see what Luke was doing but you heard sucking noises between Calum's moans. 
"I'm getting close," Calum warned you. "Oh God keep doing that," he gasped and you could hear Luke humming as he sucked. 
You jerked him faster, concentrating on the tip, tugging his nipples harder as your teeth grazed along his shoulder. 
He erupted onto Luke's chest with an "Oh God" that was both a prayer and an exultation. Luke quickly moved so he was sucking the tip and the two of you worked together to drain every drop. 
Calum slumped back against you and you peppered his skin with kisses as you felt him shudder as he came down from his high. 
"That was incredible, I don't think I can feel my legs," Calum said as he shifted so he was no longer kneeling. 
"I bet," Luke laughed as he got up. He walked over to the sink in the corner by the refrigerator and grabbed some paper towels. He got himself cleaned up before bringing some back for you and Calum. 
"Are you ok?" Luke asked when he noticed you were breathing heavily. "Do you need your inhaler?" 
You reached out your hand so he could help you up. "I'm fine, that was just intense and I got excited," you winked at him as you stood up. He pulled on your arm and caused you to stumble and fall into his chest. He wrapped you in a cuddle and bent his lips closer to your ear.
"I haven't forgotten about you princess," Luke's words made you shiver with the anticipation. You could tell your panties were soaked and your core throbbed as Luke gripped your hips and lifted you on to the break table. He stepped between your legs and put this hand under your chin and pulled you in for a kiss. Calum was still on his tongue as it tangled with yours and you tasted his essence which was sweeter than Luke's. His hands tugged at your shirt and you broke away to let him lift it over your head. He kissed you again as you fumbled with your bra, unhooking it before you tossed it across the room. Luke's mouth moved to your breasts and you saw Calum still seated on the floor as he watched you with Luke, his eyes glazed over with lust.  
When your eyes met Calum jolted out of his gaze and scrambled to his feet. You almost laughed as he tripped over his own feet as he readjusted his shorts, but at that moment Luke's mouth closed over your stiff nipple and the laugh became a moan.
Luke's fingers were clawing at your waistband and you lifted your hips as he pulled your shorts and panties down at the same time. 
The rain was beating against the roof in sheets now, but you could barely hear it over the sound of your own heartbeat.
Luke spread your legs and stepped back to show Calum. "She how pretty and wet she is for us. We gotta give her something special as a thank you. Want me to show you how to make her squirm," Luke teased, running a finger in between your soaked folds, and you pushed your hips up with a frustrated grunt. 
"Nah," Calum looked you dead in the eye with the cockiest smirk you'd ever seen in your life.
"Trust me, I know what I'm doing. I've been fantasizing about this for weeks," he was talking to Luke but his eyes were on you. "Tell me princess, do you taste as good as you look. I bet you're as sweet and juicy as a pink Starburst." 
You don't even recognize the sound that escaped your lips when Calum's mouth moved between your thighs. His tongue danced and moved in ways you'd never experienced, curling inside you before swooping up between your lips and lapping up your nectar. His pillowy lips sucked on your clit alternating with soft cool puffs of air over your fevered skin.  
Luke buried you in a flurry of kisses and you didn't know where each one was going to land, your mouth, breasts, neck, belly, shoulders, along your hairline or on your fingertips. 
Calum was relentless, barely coming up for air as he buried his face in your pleasure. You felt like a live wire as your nerves danced under your skin while Calum's tongue found every pleasure spot. Your heels beat the table in time with the storm raging outside as your orgasm started to build. You wanted to praise him or cry out but Luke covered your mouth with his. 
You arched your back almost slamming your head back on the table as Calum furiously worked on achieving your high. He wasn't going to let up until you were screaming for him, and you gladly obliged. Your climax hit you hard enough to see stars and your whole body let go.
"Damn baby," Luke's voice was in your ear but sounded very far away. 
You tried to close your legs but Calum wouldn't let you. He held them open still sucking your clit his fingers buried inside you as he coaxed another orgasm out of you.  He moaned into your skin as you drenched his face, your thighs, and the table as you came undone. He didn't stop until you were whimpering from being overstimulated, and only then did he finally pro back. 
He stood up and grabbed Luke for a kiss leaving the tall blonde as breathless as you were. The storm was still raging but your heartbeat was returning to normal. You sat up, a bit embarrassed by the mess.
"Sorry about that, can one of y'all get some towels?" You ask even though you hated to interrupt them. 
"Don't apologize," Luke stroked your thigh, and Calum did as you asked. "That was the hottest thing I've ever seen." He looked over at Calum, "will you teach me how to make her squirt like that." 
"Hell yeah," Calum answered as he gently cleaned you up. He landed a tiny kiss on your nose. "Thank you," he whispered, almost too softly to be heard. You reached down and squeezed his hand as you shared a smile. 
"How about I help y'all close up and we head back to my apartment?" Luke asked. 
"Great idea, we'll order pizza and see where the night goes."  You slid off the table, wobbled a bit but Calum wouldn't let you fall.
"Sounds like a plan, boss," Calum grinned. "Can we get ice cream too?" 
"Sure, what flavor?" You asked as you pulled your shorts up and Luke tossed your bra to you.
"Strawberry," they answered in unison before you all cracked up.
"Oh this is gonna be a great summer," you called over your shoulder as you walked out of the room.
@kiiiimberlyriiiicker1995 @ghostofmashton @sexgodashton @sublimehood @ihatetigers @calteahood @5-secondsofcolor @tea4sykes @wildmichaelflower​ @noshamenion​ @punkrockpreferences​ @rosecolouredash​ @cal-pal-cuddles​ @damselindistressanu​
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emotional-blender · 4 years
Text
fatigue (calum) au nurse!calum
a/n: hello! they say to write what you  know so, here i am. i’d like to introduce you to nurse!calum, a concept that hit me one night while i was thinking about some of the boys i’d gone to nursing school with, some of the male nurses i’ve had the chance to work with, and the way i remember feeling after long rough shifts. i wondered how cal would deal with that. there’s so much more to explore than what’s sunder this read more and i fully intend to whether or not anyone reads or likes this, because i know i’m gonna love reading it back to myself later. the “you” might not be the same in each situation, each piece may not have the same continuity but in each one he’ll be nurse!cal doing nurse things.
i intended this to be short and sweet but then things happened. i just would like to say thank you to nad, @calumscalm, for allowing me to talk her ear off about this from the conception of nurse!calum to deciding what i wanted to write my first piece about (and for continuing to listen to me yammer on about future ideas)
warnings: domestic fluff, long term relationship, swearing. basically not much. 
length: 4.6k
When Calum had crawled out of bed at 5:15 that morning, he’d done so without waking you. He wasn’t even gentle about it. He’d jerked awake at the sound of his alarm and clumsily turned it off before ambing out of bed and into the ensuite to get his shower. You were just used to this - for three days in a row Calum would get out of bed this early and be out the door by 6:10 after a filling breakfast. He’d shower, make sure he had shaved clean on the first of his three shift rotation and put on his deodorant and scrubs before crawling back into bed with you for a moment or two. With at least an hour left before you had to be awake, he never wanted to wake you. Instead, he placed a couple of sleepy kisses to where ever he could manage from his side of the bed - sometimes it was the back of your neck, sometimes it was your forehead and cheeks. Occasionally, on the good mornings, you’d sleepily open your eyes and reach for him, pulling him into a longer kiss goodbye for the day. Those mornings were his favourite.
“See you tonight, Swetpea. Love you,” He’d speak quietly as he rolled out of bed and on the mornings you’re awake to hear it, you’d smile because you can’t not smile at the nickname he gave you while you were still just friends. 
“I hate pet names,” You wrinkled your nose up a little as the two of you sat in a booth at a diner, waiting for friends to show up. You had carefully concentrated on tearing the paper off of your straw, paying more attention to it than you had been to Calum himself. You’d only known him a couple of months at that point and hadn’t given him much thought as anything more than a friend of a friend. He was cute, but he had a girlfriend. You really thought they’d get married and have kids and a dog. Besides, right now, he was quizzing you on your tastes, insisting that he knew a guy who’d be perfect for you. A moment later you grinned widely, bringing your eyes up to look at him, the straw finding its way to your mouth as you blew into it, sending the paper flying straight into one of his cheeks. You couldn’t help the laughter that spilled out of you at the look of shock on his face. It had taken him a moment to recover, reaching for the piece of paper, balling it up and setting it aside. 
“Smooth move, Sweetpea,” His tone was dry and he rolled his eyes a little, but you could see the tiny smile pulling at the corner of his lips. He may not have retaliated with words, but the nickname on it’s own had you wrinkling up your nose again, eyes narrowing as you lifted a hand, giving him the finger silently as you took a drink of your soda. He’d never stopped calling you Sweetpea after that and what started out as a way to aggravate you became a real nickname and overtime, as Calum broke up with his girlfriend, and as you two got closer your reaction to the nickname had evolved from that nose wrinkle to a silly smile. 
He always made sure to get to the hospital by 6:30, appearing on his unit with a fresh hot coffee in hand at 6:40, ready to get started on what was always a long day of testing the lengths of his own bladder and seeing how far that breakfast would get him. If he was lucky, he would get his break when he was supposed to. Somedays a half hour break had turned into a fifteen minute race to stuff his second breakfast down as quickly as he could before getting back onto the floor to make sure a patient who wasn’t looking the greatest was still alive when he got back. There was only one sure thing about being a registered nurse - that was the fact that Calum never really knew what he was walking into when he went into work. It could be anything or it could be nothing. There was never a way to tell what his day was going to look or feel like. 
From the start of his day, everything had been off. With patient notes in hand, he’d listened intently as the night nurse went through the patients she was handing off to him. One at a time she’d given him essential information; it should have been an easy day. Or at least, as easy as a day could be for him. But there was a rock sitting in the pit of his stomach from the time he’d walked in behind the nursing station. Biting his lip, brow collected in thought, he looked at his notes, deciding where to start before disappearing toward patient rooms, something inside telling him he really needed a headstart today. 
Before he’d even finished properly doling out his patients’ morning medication, a yell pulled him from what he was concentrating on. 
“She’s not breathing!” 
His head whipped up from what he was doing and Calum immediately bolted toward the sound of the voice. His hand instinctively reached into the pocket of his scrubs to pull the stethoscope from it’s usual home. His feet carried him at high speed into the room, where he listened for a pulse on her chest and hit the button in the wall when he couldn’t hear any. Everything around him was chaos. As alarms went off letting the rest of the hospital know there was a code blue in his patients’ room, every nurse who worked on the floor seemed to show up, working like a well oiled machine. Calum himself had started chest compressions; someone else started breaths with mask and bag; another person read her blood pressure; and still, someone else wrote everything down. It was a blur and as he concentrated on making sure her heart was pumping hard and fast enough to keep blood and oxygen circulating, he couldn’t help but think, at the back of his mind, that his day was going to be so much longer now. 
The thing was he hadn’t been wrong. Even after the patient had been resuscitated and moved to a different floor (and off of his caseload), his day was set back nearly an hour. And if there had  been a second thing Calum had learned for sure in the relatively short time he’d been a nurse, it was that an empty bed or a discharge always meant an admission was coming. As he went about the rest of his morning, never once moving at a leisurely speed, he watched the now empty room, silently hoping the custodial staff took their time getting it ready and available for someone else, just so he could catch up. 
Calum didn’t get a first break that day. By the time his second had come around, he was hurriedly preparing discharge papers for an impatient woman who’d been ringing her call bell every half hour wondering when the doctor would be there to discharge her, and then, wondering when Calum would have her discharge papers ready. Truthfully, Calum was just as impatient as she was, though the woman and her husband would never be able to tell by the friendly smile and warm tone he used every time he went in to answer the same question over and over. 
“Cal, have you taken a break yet?” The familiar voice of the nurse who’d trained him when he started his job cut through his concentration as he filled out the forms in  his scratchy handwriting. 
“Haven’t had time,” He responded without looking up, lip tucking between his teeth as his brow furrowed, reading over the paperwork one last time before standing from the chair he’d been slumped over in safely in the refuge of the nursing station. When he finally looked up at the petite blonde with her curly hair pulled up into a ponytail, he was met with a look of understanding. He couldn’t help but offer a smile of his own, as if to reassure her that he was fine. 
“Well, there’s code pizza in the staff lounge,” She offered, with a nod of her head in its general direction. “Make sure you get some, it was your code,” 
At that, Calum couldn’t help but laugh a little and shake his head. Management didn’t often treat their staff to anything. Any food in the staff lounge had always been provided by the nurses themselves; an organized group order or just the copious amounts of baking someone had done on their days off, bringing it in to keep themselves and their families from gorging on it. But a code blue always guaranteed a couple of pizzas would appear in the lounge, for the specific reason that a code tended to throw everyone’s day off, though some more than others. 
“I’m going right after I get 422 out of my face,” He commented, straightening up and sticking his pen in his pocket as he wandered toward the room in question to do just that. 
His second break was cut short and as he sat in the lounge, he was finally able to fish his phone out of his pocket, sending you a text. 
Longest day... Just getting my break.
When you looked at it, you couldn’t help but frown and glance at the clock. It was already nearly four in the afternoon, and while your day was nearly finished, you knew he was probably just getting his first break for the day. You knew he was starving and that whatever he’d packed for the day wouldn’t do much. The thing about Calum was that he was responsible - he didn’t pick food for work that was going to bog him down. He went in with veggie wraps and salads, with yogurts, cheeses, apples and peanut butter or hummus and crackers for protein. Healthy, but not as filling as you knew he wanted if he was texting you for the first time that day at 4pm.
:( hate that for u, bubs. 
You replied simply, knowing he just needed to vent, to let his mind wander from the hospital for a moment, to break up the chaotic day he was having. 
Thai take out later? Pleeeeeeease???? 
You couldn’t help but smile at the quick response he’d given you. 
Pad see ew AND the good cold veg rolls, yes of course. 
Honestly, at the end of not only his usual three days at work, but an extra for the overtime cash, Calum could ask you for anything and you’d give it to him. Thai food was easy to make happen. You’d try your hardest to make sure it got to the house you shared around when you knew he’d get out of the shower.
Can’t wait. Love you. Gotta get back. 
Love you too. 
That was the last you’d heard of him until three hours later when another text came through as you finished putting away some of the groceries you’d picked up on the way home. Again, you couldn’t help but frown. 
Might still be an hour, crazy day. Finishing up some charting. 
You take notice of the time again and plan to order food accordingly. He comes into the house about twenty minutes earlier than you expected, looking more tired than you’ve seen him, well, since the last time this happened. Looking up at him from where you were sitting in the living room, he offered you a small tired smile as he kicked off his shoes and dropped his bag down beside them.
“Didn’t take as long as you thought?” You asked, turning your body a little so you can see him better. You feel Duke, the small dog Calum’s had for a few years now, jump off of the sofa and run towards his favorite human. 
“Honestly? Didn’t care if I looked lazy only putting in what was different instead of every single thing,” He explained. Even his voice sounded tired. A groan left him as he looked down at the dog who’s entire body was wiggling excitedly. 
“Oh, not yet, buddy. Pop’s fuckin filthy boy. Go see mama,” Calum couldn’t help but reach down anyway, giving Duke a scratch behind his ears before he walked the rest of the way into the house, stopping to get a better look at you. “I need a shower,” His voice was soft and you nodded a reply, turning back to what you were watching on tv as he went straight to the laundry room, pulling off his dirty scrubs and throwing them into the washer directly, letting his underwear and socks follow. When he’d passed by you again he was completely naked, walking from the laundry room, past the living room and down the hall to the bathroom. You couldn’t help but crack a smile, craning your neck a little as you watched him wander down the hall and disappear.
You gave him some time after you heard the water turn on, a few minutes to stand there and let the room fill with steam while the hot water helps to relax his muscles. Then you couldn’t help yourself. It was so easy to slip into the bathroom behind him, peeling off your own clothes from the day and letting them drop to the floor before slipping into the shower where he was just standing with his eyes closed. 
“Miss me?” He asked you, cracking an eye open as he looked down at you and you couldn’t help but laugh because even when he’s exhausted, he’s got the energy to make fun of you. 
“Water conservation,” You denied the fact that you did actually miss him. You always missed him on the runs when he pushed himself to work four 12 hour shifts in a row. You knew the overtime pay and the opportunity to learn fueled his decision to commit to the occasional 48 hour work week, but you also knew that when he got home on  his last day he was dead on  his feet and ready to sleep on and off for the next twenty four hours. Truthfully, you missed him a lot and as much as Calum couldn’t wait to get home at the end of his work week, you couldn’t wait for him to get home either. 
“Seems legit,” He replied, lips pulling into a smirk as he lifted his arms to push his hair back out of his face. His head tilted back, neck exposed as he really let the water wash over his face instead of his shoulders. You couldn’t help but shiver a little,  his body blocked the stream from you, but there was no way you were going to make him  move for you. Instead you grabbed the washcloth he’d brought in with him, reaching for his soap and lathering it up on the cloth. 
Wordlessly, you let your hands guide the soapy cloth over his chest and shoulders, washing his skin and earning a soft groan of approval as he just stood there and let you. You took your time with the task, knowing that even after he was sufficiently clean, the feeling of the soapy cloth dragging across his skin was relaxing him. You spared no effort, washing from his shoulders and chest down his arms and  to his thighs. 
“Turn around, bub,” You spoke softly and there was nothing he could do but listen to you, turning so that the water rinsed his front. You continued your care on  his back side, across his shoulder blades, down to his hips and over his glutes, taking your time. You couldn’t help the small smile that shoved it’s way onto your face everytime he let out a soft moan or groan of appreciation at your actions. This is exactly what you wanted; to take care of your tired love. He needed to relax. 
“All done,” Your voice was quiet. He turned back toward you and you held out the cloth so he could wash the parts he felt like maybe you didn’t go over thoroughly enough - his armpits or the space between his thighs where you knew his balls had gotten sweaty over the day. 
“Get under,” He smiled down at you and you grinned, reaching for his arms as the two of you shimmied past each other, switching places. When you were under the spray, wetting your hair, you felt his hand reach up to squeeze at your breast, eyes snapping open to look at him, laughter bubbling up from your chest at the look on his face. 
“What?” He asked, feigning innocence, hand still on you, just resting there. “How are you gonna lift your arms like that and expect me to keep my hands to myself?” And just like that he gave one more squeeze for good measure before reaching for his shampoo, lathering up his hair while you reached for your own. A moment later had you both standing there, staring at each other with soapy hair. Giggling, you stepped closer, out of the spray as you stretched up to his hair, letting your hands sculpt it into a messy mohawk before you moved to rinse your own shampoo.
“Silly,” He commented before you were doing the switch again, letting him under the spray to rinse his hair while you put conditioner in yours and lathered up your bright yellow loofah with your own soap. The smell of lavender burst through the steam as you started washing up yourself. It didn’t take long, but still when you were finished your eyes found Calum’s staring at you, drinking in the sight of you while he enjoyed the spray still washing over him. You really couldn’t help the way you grinned at him, cheeks flushing just a bit, though with the heat of the room, it surely wasn’t noticeable. 
“Switch,” You mumbled softly and you do it one more time, a well practised maneuver that had you avoiding touching him and getting your soap all over his clean body. You rinsed quickly, and this time when you shimmy by him, less careful about not touching, it’s to slip out of the shower and into your robe. 
“Can you grab me a beer?” He asked as you wrapped your hair in a towel, rolling your eyes a little and looking back to where he had his head poked past the shower curtain to look at you. There was a big smile plastered on his face, his eyes turning to little moons. “Please,” He added a moment later and you laugh, nodding your head before disappearing out the door, leaving it slightly ajar, letting some of the steam out into the hall. 
When you get back to the bathroom, Duke had flopped on the floor outside the shower, enjoying being as close to Calum as he could get. You didn’t bother chasing him out like you normally would, instead you peeked your head back in the shower and held up the can of cold beer. 
“That’s my girl,” Calum voices his appreciation as he pops the tab and you swear he drinks half the can in one go before setting it on a shelf and going back to what he was doing previous - standing under the spray, letting it relax his muscles. 
“Dinner will be here soon,” You let him know as you started moisturizing, sitting on the toilet with the lid down. When Duke had come up to your legs and started licking, you let out a giggle, shooing him away with your foot. 
“No way, little dude. You can’t eat mama’s lotion,” Despite the amused smile on your face, you try to be stern in your tone and you hear Calum’s own deep laugh make its way from behind the shower curtain. The water turns off a moment later and before he could even ask you were holding Calum’s towel out for him. Opening the curtain, he gives you a tired sweet grin, teeth bared, cheeks high on his face, eyes crinkled before leaning over just enough to press a kiss to your lips. 
“I’ll be down in the dining room,” You let him know before giving him one more kiss and leaving the bathroom. He tried to swat at your ass, just barely missing it and you give him one last look back, sticking out your tongue before you’d really disappeared. 
He hadn’t taken as long to dry and get dressed, appearing in the dining room about ten minutes later in just a pair of low hanging grey sweats. When you'd seen him you were standing at the table, unpacking a big brown bag of Thai food. You sighed softly as he wrapped his arms around you from behind, breathing in a deep breath of his fresh post-shower smell and his minty toothpaste. The pause in your movements couldn’t be helped, your hands moving to rest on his as he gave you a squeeze and pressed a kiss to the top of your still wet hair. 
“Knew you’d come through,” He mumbled against you, letting his head rest there. You could feel his body relax against you, slumping slightly and using you to hold himself up just a little. You nodded your head and tilted it a bit, squeezing his forearms before you started moving again. You wanted to urge him to go sit on the sofa, but you knew he wouldn’t go. He never did, insisting he wanted to be close to you as much as he wanted to be alone. The trade off was comfortable silence, so you were wordless as you finished unpacking the bag, lifting the container his food was in along with a pair of wooden chopsticks. Turning your body a little, you grinned up at him as you handed them off. 
“Now go sit, I’m right behind you,” You nudged him away with your hip and he gave a sleepy nod. You can tell the jolt of energy the shower had given him was wearing off. Combined with the beer he’d quickly downed, he was definitely going to fade fast. You tucked two beers from the fridge into the pockets of your robe before following him with your own food. You can hear him let out a groan as he sunk into the couch and you knew without looking that his limbs were sprawled out with his food sitting on the coffee table in front of him. This is routine; something you’d built into your lives since you’d moved in together. You allowed yourself to sigh silently, wishing his day hadn’t been longer than it should have been, and that it had gone smoothly.
While you never knew the exact details of his day, you were the person he came home to. You knew intimately how exhausted he was after his regular thirty six hours of work, let alone the forty eight he’d just endured. You knew by the way his shoulders slumped if they’d been awful days or by the tired but genuine smiles he saved for you if they had been good ones. There were days when his face was stone cold and talking wasn’t something he was willing to do. But then there were days when he spoke. Those were the days when you were reminded how much he trusted you, because even though there were never any details about the things he needed to get off his chest, the utmost trust was required even to let the most vague rants slip off of his tongue. There was a certain catharsis in venting; confidentiality was woven into the make up of Calum’s job. He had to trust more than completely that the walls of his home and your love were safe sponges. And they were - that was something you had made sure of. 
Today wasn’t a day for talking. You sat on the couch beside him, fishing the beers our of your pockets when you were settled, hanging him one and popping the top of your own. You ate quietly, laughing occasionally as an old recorded episode of Drag Race played in the background. He shoveled nearly the entire container of noodles and vegetables into his mouth in record time, his second beer disappearing a little slower but definitely disappearing. You took a little more time with your food, leaving leftovers as you set it aside and sat back, shifting your body and beckoning him closer. He came willingly, head resting on your chest as you let a hand card through short thick curls.
“Don’t let me fall asleep,” He mumbled and you couldn’t help the laughter you responded with, bowing your head to press a kiss to the top of his head. 
“You’re a grown man who can decide where and when he falls asleep,” You tease, your hand rubbing down the side of his face to his chin and back up, smiling at the way his four day old scruff feels. His reply is a snort because this is routine, too. As you let the episode finish, Calum will shift. He’ll snuggle closer, press his cheek to your breast and let a hand rest on your hand, fingers contracting and squeezing a few times as his body twitches, getting rid of the last of its excess energy as he falls asleep on you. You’ll let him, not having the heart to either wake or move him. It won’t be until you or Duke need to use the bathroom, whichever comes first, that you’ll wake him with a hand rubbing his arm and kisses to the top of his head.  That’s when he’ll grumble at you, whining low about a crick in his neck as he lifts his head, lips jutting out a little as he waits for you to give him a kiss. You never deny him, pressing your lips to his for a long moment and then a few short pecks as you shove him up to an upright position.
There’s no fanfare as you shoo him off to your bedroom with the promise that you’re right behind him. You watched his tired body retreat to where he can actually lay down comfortably, then you lead Duke’s wiggling excited body to the back door, letting him out one last time for the day before, as promised, you let your feet carry you the rest of the way to your bedroom. 
The effort it takes to get into bed is minimal. Even in his sleepy state Calum pulled the covers back for you. You slid out of your robe and into the blankets beside him like it was a seamless practised dance you’ve done over and over, and like everything else this evening you have. Flicking the light of the lamp beside you off, you settled, pulling him to you and letting him resume his previous position. He pressed his cheek to your bare breast and you could  feel the steadily timed gusts of his warm breath on your skin. It was comfort at it’s most reliable. Less than five minutes later sees you listening as his snores filled the room and you’d let out a content sigh, shifting just a little and closing your own eyes. You always take longer to fall asleep, but on nights like this when you didn’t dare move a muscle to disturb him, it came to you a little easier. That night, you fall asleep without an alarm. 
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