#60 feels like so much but no this is the actual number

[faultsofyouth]

Honestly, the more I research into larger dog breeds, the more a rottweiler seems like the dog for me

#it ticks off all my desires for a large dog + my mom has had good experiences with them #they are good with other animals. good with children (not babies but i dont have babies in the house) #they are not exceptionally difficult to train + they are cuddly + they are guard dogs + they have a scary reputation #But they have a much lower attack rate than all pit variations. like yes they are considered the second most frequent biters #but the difference is 11% with rotties to 60% with purebred pits. not even including mixes in those stats #so like that is everything i want right there. of course i would have to make a lot more money in order to afford the right classes #(also just to afford the dog i mean. im unemployed lol) #but i want a dog that makes me feel like i can leave the house by myself at night. i want a dog that Looks intimidating and Will defend me #but who can also distinguish between a friend and a foe and actually Be friendly towards the former #also i like that they make happy grumbles like. ive never personally met a rottweiler but they do strike me as very charming #[also to be clear to those who dont just Know the dog bite stats off the top of their heads: #the aforementioned numbers = the percent of dog bites attributed to those breeds. so like 60% of all lethal + maiming attacks #are done by pitbulls and ditto for the 11% of rottweiler attacks. NOT that 11% of rotties attack people]

[davidtennantgenderenvy]

On David Tennant and Aging

So, I’ve seen a lot of posts in response to Tumblr users’ habit of affectionately calling their favorite middle aged dudes “old men”, David Tennant in particular, saying things like “clearly you’ve never met an actual old person”, “omg you talk about these guys like they’re 80”, “please be normal about people aging”, etc. And on one hand, all of these statements are objectively right and true! But as someone who’s always been really fascinated by and found a lot of beauty in getting older (which I’ve explored in some of my writing on A03 because nobody else is going to do it for me), I’d like to provide a bit more nuance on how I think this label applies to David in particular.

David, obviously, in literal terms, is not “old”, at least not to me- I don’t personally consider people old until they get past 60. 52 is middle aged, simple as that. And yet, when I see David stuck with the “old man” label, it still somehow feels weirdly right, for a number of reasons.

It annoys me so much when people say David “hasn’t aged a day since Doctor Who”, because, well…

He clearly has. A lot. He’s got forehead creases, deep crows’ feet and eyebags, and I think that post-Fourteen we’re gonna see him rocking the grey temples a LOT more. He also has the voice of an older man now, his upper range is still there but the default is much more deep and rich, with a gravelly, rumbling quality that just goes straight through you. I personally think Broadchurch was when David finally started to embrace looking his age- Alec Hardy just wouldn’t have been served by Ten’s fresh-faced boyishness.

Obviously, these are the kinds of changes you’d expect any 52-year-old man to have, but something about David just makes it all seem a bit more… intense? The expressiveness of his face combined with his almost gaunt frame makes his wrinkles very prominent, and when he works his voice to its emotional extremes, his lower register can sound positively ancient, to devastating effect.

David, I think, is someone with an old soul- I don’t think he could be as good as he is at playing ancient characters like Crowley and The Doctor if he weren’t. He has lived so many lives, given so much of himself to so many characters, often incredibly tragic ones, and I think it wears on him. David also has five kids. FIVE. Do you know how exhausting it is to be one of the hardest working actors alive and be a present, loving father to even ONE child? But David somehow does it anyway! Nowadays I see him and my heart breaks because he looks so tired, so weary and fragile. But he’s all the more beautiful for it to me because I know that that is because he is kind. He’s a deeply empathetic person who feels and lives to the absolute fullest, and that story is written so clearly on his face, along with every other story he has ever been a part of.

There’s other things about David that make the label endearingly fitting- his utter hopelessness when it comes to technology, for instance. And he’s just got that warm, wise, grandpa energy too sometimes- look at that above Fourteen picture and tell me I’m wrong!

I once showed my friend who’d only seen David in Doctor Who and Harry Potter a picture of David from Around The World in 80 Days. It was a particularly emotional scene, and his face had just the most beautiful expression of compassion and sadness, every wrinkle on full display. And she said, in a less than complimentary fashion, “he looks so old!” Which, of course, offended me quite a bit at first. But to me, referring to David as old almost feels like a badge of honor, something he’s earned by living fully and selflessly, working hard and being wise and compassionate beyond his years. I think David himself is secretly more than a little insecure about the fact that he’s getting older. There’s sadness behind every jovially self-depreciating remark he’s made about his age in the past year, particularly in comparing himself to Ncuti Gatwa. I know how much David struggles with his impostor syndrome and how people perceive him, and I can clearly see in his eyes the fear of being discarded, the anxiety he feels about if he’ll still be as loved as he was back in 2007 now that he’s closer in age to King Lear than he is to Romeo. So I hope David knows it’s a privilege to watch him grow older, to watch his soul and talents deepen with the crinkles around his eyes. If I, in my silly goofy tumblr girl-ness, call David Tennant an old man, it’s because it’s a label that suits him beautifully- even if it isn’t TECHNICALLY an accurate one yet.

#David tennant #doctor who #the tenth doctor #the fourteenth doctor #good omens #crowley #shakespeare #around the world in 80 days #phileas fogg #pro aging #growing old

[noneorother]

All the music you didn’t hear: The Good Omens soundtrack is lying to you. *Part 1*

The Bonkers Meta Series part 2: Electric Boogaloo.

I so rarely get a chance to misuse my experience in classical music, but here we are. When I realized on my most recent watch-through of the series that the David Arnold score was brilliant, but also really wonky in some parts and I couldn’t put my finger on why, @embracing-the-ineffable suggested I listen to the album soundtrack to compare.

And when I tell you what I found hidden in there, you’re going to need Eccles cakes...

1) The Song is the Clue

So right up top we have this banger. The 12th track on the album is the orchestral backdrop to the scene in the Job minisode where Aziraphale reveals Crowley’s crow/goats. The duration is 2:22 (the only track with multiples on the album), and if you look at the track by itself it doesn’t mean much. But the song just before it is actually from this fucking scene:

You know, the one where there’s a song that’s a clue to a mystery. Except Clue is capitalised, and Aziraphale pronounces it. I’ve seen guesses that this is a reference to the movie Clue, but I would put a lot of money on the fact that we are supposed to read the title of the song currently playing at that moment in the show *as a Clue*, which is super convenient, because the word Clue is capitalized in the track listing. 

Seems like the overlords of Good Omens have a message for us : The song is the Clue. It’s what God wants. Cool cool cool. WHAT SONG?

2) Symmetry in all things 

Before I straight up tell you, we have to go back and look at season 1.

Now I’m far from the first to notice tons of parallels between the story, details and even lines in both seasons. It got me thinking that maybe there are some fun synch-up parallels between the two season’s soundtracks, seeing as they are both 6 episodes long. Here’s the end of S1 and then S2

Oh that’s a bummer, I thought to myself. 

They don’t even add up to the same number, or playtime, and neither of them is exactly 60 tracks. But do you want to hear a secret? S2 is actually missing 3 tracks on the album. And because there are 2 discs in S2 (cute), the numbers of the tracks start over again from 1. Remember how much God likes sevens? Check out where all the weirdness is happening in disc 2 (I’ve added the missing track listings in red to add context):

After checking each track with the show and listening side by side (for reasons that will become clear in another post) I can definitively say that there is something *very weird* going on at the end of episode 4. 

First is track 7, Zombie dressing room, which seems to actually reach over two distinct scenes of the photo evidence in the dressing room and then Shax in hell even though it only has one title.

But *between* these two scenes we get an eerily silent wine date with Aziraphale & Crowley.

There’s really no music or even sound here besides the dialogue and room tone (until after the cheers), and it seems like a very intentionally silent version of a ritz date from season 1.

My best guess is that we are supposed to divide that track into two tracks of 7, before and after the date to get a second track 7. Or maybe the silent one is missing music? The third track number 7 is the weirdest one. It’s this scene here, when Nina parks her bike, and Aziraphale parks the car at the end of S2E4.

If you take a close listen to the music, it’s a jaunty little piece, with an oom-pah base in 3 ⁄ 4 time. The thing is, this music does not exist in any Good Omens album. Please feel free to correct me, but I’ve tried to find any part of any song that this could even be a reprise of, and I Shazammed it to be sure it wasn’t anything else. This song does not exist anywhere except in this scene. (It quickly morphs into a reprise of the original theme once Nina leaves Aziraphale). It’s an invisible song.

So we have 3 tracks at the end of S2E4: a long one, a silent one and an invisible one. Only one of which is numbered 7, but that all fit into that place in the track listing.

Which, when we add the two extras to the original total of fifty-nine we get... sixty-one! Hey wait a minute.

How are we going to get to 62?

3) The real missing track. 

So the real reason we had to go back to the S1 album was because it contains the missing track that God is talking about. Let’s compare the last tracks on each album.

I’ve highlighted the mismatch between the in-show music and the album in S2, which means I had to add A Nightingale Sang in Berkeley Square back into the S2 album because guess what, it’s not in the S2 album. Even though it plays in the show. 

You want to know how not in the album it is? Amazon had to track it in the show as a season 1 song. They had to give Tori Amos credit for her song on Good Omens in the X-ray bonus features because that’s how not in the album this song is.

So my fellow beings, if the song is the Clue, then It’s what God Wants.

And if God wants a happily ever after with Aziraphale and Crowley on their own side, then by Job, I think Neil is going to give it to her.

-----------

And there's more where that came from! Part 2 coming shortly.

#good omens meta #art director talks good omens #go season 2 #good omens 2 #go2 #good omens prime #good omens season two #go meta #good omens season 2 #go3 #good omens 2 meta #crowley x aziraphale #aziraphale #anthony j crowley #good omens spoilers

[poisonous-honey]

Just Unbuilt, Or Am I Unwanted?

As you try to improve Xiao's build for the 100th time, some of the others finally lose their patience

Who's Here! Amber, Aether, Lyney, Childe, and Paimon. The reader/player is off to the side with Xiao

Contains: Self Aware Genshin/SAGAU (Not The Cult), Childe being stupid (Childe slander), Angst if you squint but it's really just crack

Notes: Saw the idea from @devildomangel and kinda just ran with it. Because I took the idea from her Xiao is the player's main unit in this. Which is kinda unfortunate cause that means he's only talked about lol

---

Walking through Mondstadt, Amber is on her way to Good Hunter for her lunch break when she sees the traveller apparate before the fountain. His appearance usually means the player has logged on again so she swiftly abandons her lunch plans and rushes over to the traveller, waving her arms in greeting.

“Hey traveller! Welcome back to the land of the living!”

Aether turns in Amber’s direction before giving her a little smile and waving back. 

“Hey Amber. Good to be back.”

“Has the player finally logged on again?”

He sighs. It’s just his luck the first person he talks to wants to talk more about you than him. 

“Yeah.”

“What’re their plans today?”

And of course it’s just his luck he has to crush their spirits. What a wonderful way to start his day.

“... What do you think”

Amber pouts at that. You promised you’d build her sometime ago, but it feels like it’s been a year since you said that, and she’s still only level 60! She’s been sitting here off to the side for how long while your ‘darling’ is getting all your love and attention. There are so many characters that deserve some time, promises of stronger builds that need to be fulfilled, but you just won’t! Either you're willingly not doing it or you just forgot. She doesn’t know which one’s worse.

“A-are you sure? Maybe they’re going to work on someone else today! Maybe they’re going to work on Collei, or Lynette, o-or-”

“Amber please,” Aether sighs again and looks quite exasperated as he turns to Amber “... It’s Xiao again.”

As Amber is about to try and counter his claim, they hear the teleport waypoint activate and quickly hide out of view of the camera.

“Kathryn, expeditions, blacksmith, uhh I think I have to go to the Serenitea Pot today- wait what domain was I going to do again?”

Peaking around Marjorie’s shop, they watch as you hand in the daily commissions you didn’t do. Amber was hoping to hear you talk about anyone else to prove Aether wrong please prove him wrong while he wanted to make sure Amber didn’t do anything rash.

“Oh right I was going to farm Marechaussee Hunter today.”

Sparkles appeared in Amber’s eyes as she quickly turned to Aether, “Did you hear that? That’s the Denouncement of Sin domain-”

“It’s actually Denouement of Sin.”

“Oh! Thank you, but more importantly it’s not The Lost Valley! That means it’s not Vermillion Hereafter which means it’s not Xiao!”

Aether doesn’t know if he should be amused or sad for her. “Just give it a second.”

She tilts her head “Why would-”

“With Hunters Xiao basically has 60 CRT rate off hop. Paired with Jade Spear it’s 80… something. I’d barely need any CRT rate rolls and can stack so much CRT damage and ATK. It probably won’t be that much better than the sets I already have, but funny numbers win in the end time to farm for his fourth set!”

You teleport away, none the wiser to the despair you just put Amber in. All Aether does is pat her back before getting ready to teleport himself.

“I tried to warn you not to get your hopes up.”

Amber barely hears him as she drowns herself in self-pity. Looking like a husk of the person she is “... He’s getting a fourth. I don’t even have one.”

Aether winces, but can’t think of anything to say that might lift her spirits. He doesn’t think there is anything that can, so he teleports to Fontaine.

---

As he lands at the closest waypoint north of the domain and starts walking towards it, he notices a certain top hat individual staring in the direction of Denouement of Sin. As Aether gets closer he hastily turns around upon hearing his footsteps. Getting over his slight panic he brightly smiles.

“Oh ho if it isn’t the traveller! What brings you to this part of Fontaine during such a fine afternoon?’

“I’m here to keep an eye on our player Lyney. As usual. Seeing as you’re not making your way over to the domain I assume you’re not here to do the same?” Aether questions in a deadpan voice and crosses his arms, not up to deal with Lyney’s antics at the moment.

Lyney’s lips twitch downwards and a look of sadness crosses his face for a split second before he puts up his smile again. “Getting right to it, I see. Well I actually was here to watch our dear player, since they are technically farming for me as well today, but on my way over I happened to notice someone enter the side entrance to the domain. That’s not so suspicious on its own, but they were being awfully secretive about it.”

Aether’s eyes widen “Wait. Do you think they’re going to the backroom where the artifact codes are?”

“Bingo! I had stopped to ponder what my next course of action should be, leave and get help or spy on them by myself, when you just so happened to show up! Don’t you think we should go see what they’re up to?”

---

Aether and Lyney quietly enter the hidden side entrance in the mountain. Spawning on the outer regions of the domain they swiftly make their way to the backroom through the trees while trying not to slip on the wet grass into the water.

After a few close calls and one save from a floating jellyfish, they jump from the broken bridge into the backroom behind the Petrified Tree. There, standing in front of a clear screen with a heap of intelligible jargon and surrounded by machinery and wires is-

“Childe?” “Master Tartaglia?”

“Oh hello comrades!” He turns around and waves. Like he didn’t just enter territory that the Archons personally had restricted.

Seeing Childe standing over the console with the code open alarms both the other men at the scene.

Aether ignores him and sharply walks over to turn off the console when Childe blocks his path. Aether sends him the hardest glare he could.

“What do you think you’re doing Childe?”

“Hm? Oh, you mean the code! I’m just looking there’s no need for you two to worry!”

“With all due respect Master Tartaglia,” Lyney interjects as politely as he could to his superior while still being stern “That’s not exactly believable when barely anyone in Teyvat can even understand the player's written language.”

They all stand there in silence for a second before they hear Xiao’s plunge attacks and your laughs from the room over. This ticks off Childe more than he’d like to admit.

“Okay you got me I wasn’t initially here to just look, but, like you said, I can’t decipher what any of this means, so I was going to leave it alone anyway.”

Aether puts his hands on his hips with a disappointed look while Lyney crosses his arms and raises an eyebrow.

“So what were you going to do before?”

Childe turns back to the code “Well I was wondering if changing the rates to impossible odds would convince our dear player to finally see that they don’t need to work on some washed up warrior anymore and start building someone else for a change.”

In exasperation Aether pinches the bridge of his nose “Do you really not realize how stupid your plan is?”

“What no it’s great. After a little while they’d realize that continuing to build this guy is a waste of time when he’s been done for so long already. Maybe it’d get them to finally finish my own artifacts.”

“Doing this would cause the opposite effect of what you’re looking for. Just wait your turn.”

“It hasn’t been my turn in ages, comrade.”

Aether getting increasingly more done with this conversation pulls his sword out at Childe. “Step away from the console.”

Childe forms his hydro weaponry in retaliation and points one in Aether’s direction “Like you can get me to do anything by only pointing a sword in my direction.”

Lyney, realizing that starting a fight while the console is still on and the code still visible might not be the best idea, goes to step in between them. “Listen I don’t think-”

“WHAT’S GOING ON HERE!?”

“Paimon?”

The outburst from Paimon causes Lyney to instantly turn around, and he loses his footing, causing him to fall straight into Childe. Childe in turn quickly puts his hand onto the wall next to him to stabilize himself and keep Lyney from crashing into the floor.

Childe pushes himself off the wall and puts Lyney back into a standing position. 

“Thanks, I-” Lyney suddenly stops and stares in horror behind him.

“What? What is it?”

Childe turns around and sees the jagged hole in the screen and the machinery behind it. It stutters and flickers, scrambling the code before finally shutting down. He winces when he realizes he forgot to make his hydro weapons fade away. He tries to shrug it off, but can’t help the feeling this is the worst way his issue could’ve been solved.

“Well, I guess that’s one way to solve a problem?”

They all look at him in disbelief and soon Paimon is stomping in the air angrily.

“UGH! Paimon didn’t take you to be this big of an idiot! How did this happen? Why are you all even here??”

“We were following Master Tartaglia to see what he was up to. He wanted to change the artifact rates to be near impossible. He didn’t explain what about the rates he was even changing.”

Paimon backs in shock “WHAT? Why would you even do that. How does that solve any problem you could be having?”

For the second time Childe tries to get his opinion across. “Once the player sees they’re not getting anything good from this domain, surely they’ll pivot and work on someone else. Preferably me.”

“PAIMON CAN’T BELIEVE PAIMON’S OPINION OF YOU COULD GET ANY LOWER! That’s not what’s going to happen at all! All the player is going to think is that they’re getting really unlucky and will keep trying. Why would getting ‘unlucky’ make them try to build someone else when they think the artifact rates are the same everywhere. It’s just going to make building Xiao take even longer!”

It finally sinks into his head how bad this decision of his was and pure dread spreads across his face. 

He grabs Aether by his shoulder and swings his free arm in the general direction of the broken code “No wait surely we can fix this. It was just an accident I didn’t mean to actually go through with it.”

Aether sighs and crosses his arms “I’m sure the only beings capable of fixing this mess are the Archons.”

Hearing that the Archons might have to get involved stresses Lyney out of his mind.  “Are you sure? I can’t see the gods taking kindly to us even entering this room in the first place, let alone destroying the code.”

“I could ask if Albedo knows how. Though I doubt he’d fix it much faster than someone like the dendro Archon could.”

Paimon nods along with the traveller “Yeah! He’d also treat you way worse than the dendro Archon since it’s the player you’re upsetting. Nahida is probably your best option.”

“What do you mean ‘your’? This is partly your fault too Paimon.”

Paimon starts to argue with Aether that she was barely in the room, so there’s no way it could be her fault, while Lyney silently hopes Lynette is doing well. Childe wants to argue he could handle anything that either god or human would throw at him, before your voice suddenly rings throughout the room. 

“Damn nothing again? I guess I just started, but I’d like to get something with at least CRT damage. I just want to see some funny numbers game.”

Paimon leaves them to their frenzy, discretely slipping back to your side. The three hooligans all look at each other before hurriedly exiting the domain and rushing to Sumeru to get anyone to try and fix it.

You get nothing good out of that domain for the rest of the month.

#sagau #genchin crack #genshin reader insert #self aware genshin #x reader #pois.writes #pois.posts

[galaxymagitech]

Batfam Kill Counts

I believe that the kill counts for the Batfam are in the following order: 1. Jason (~500); 2. Tim (100-300); 3. Alfred (20-100); 4. Damian (~50); 5. Bruce (5-10); 6. Dick (1-5); 7. Cass (1)

However, based on the absolute certain facts and not just speculation, kill counts are as follows, I believe: 1. Jason (83 confirmed); 2. Alfred (many); 3. Damian (3+); 4&5. Cass & Bruce (1); 6. Dick (1-ish); 7. Everyone else (0)

These aren’t counting vampires or pre-crisis early Batman characterization. I have probably missed some stuff because I have only read some comics, but from what I’ve read and Google this is my general understanding.

Reasoning explained:

1. Jason — Jason has 83 confirmed kills, but honestly I don’t buy that he hasn’t killed more than that. I’m interpreting “confirmed” as in “we have absolute proof that the Red Hood killed them” whereas his actual kill count is much higher. I headcanon it as somewhere around 500 people, but the number could be in the thousands.

2. Tim — This one’s controversial…I personally think Tim killed people when blowing up the League of Assassins bases, but not nearly as many as people often say. He definitely blew up the bases BY blowing up their computer systems, and there are explosions shown. Probably around 100-300 people, as a side effect and not the goal.

3. Alfred — Served in the military, but people SEVERELY overestimate the number of kills a soldier would have from that, especially as he presumably wasn’t dropping bombs. In WWII estimates for average number of kills per soldier range from 5-20. Alfred was likely exceptional, but I doubt that he killed more than 100 people. He may actually be #4 on this list, with fewer kills than Damian.

4. Damian — Confirmed kills are Spook and Nobody, and he did those so easily that he has DEFINITELY killed routinely, but again, I think people attribute far more kills to him than he actually has done. He was raised in the League of Assassins, but they don’t just kill willy-nilly. He’s probably killed <10 people to prove he’s capable of it and <100 people (maybe even 0) for the League. Overall, I don’t buy that Damian has killed more than 60 people.

5. Bruce — I think he has accidentally killed a significant number of people. This one’s also controversial, but his methods are brutal and he’s been working for a long time. It’s likely that he’s done enough damage that the criminal dies in the hospital multiple times. He’s also done things like leaving KGBeast to die trapped underground or bleeding out unable to move in the tundra by his hand. I don’t think he’s watched someone die by his hands, but…yeah. He has also killed Darkseid for sure.

6. Dick — Killed Joker (who was revived soon afterwards, so it half-counts), has also worked with Batman so long that I think he has killed other people by accident too. Has also displayed disregard for if his actions result in a criminal being killed by other criminals, especially early on in Nightwing (1996). Considers himself to have killed Blockbuster, but…yeah no.

7. Cass — 1 confirmed kill. After that, she ran and put in a large amount of effort to avoid killing ever again. She became evil, but I’m pretty sure this has been unwritten and most people refuse to accept it anyway.

To my knowledge, Steph, Barbara, and Duke haven’t killed anyone, and likely have not accidentally killed anyone either due to their methods.

Of course, feel free to disagree!

#meta #batman #dick grayson #jason todd #tim drake #alfred pennyworth #damian wayne #cassandra cain #bruce wayne #batfamily #batfam #dc #dc comics #dcu #text post #dc meta #batman meta #headcanon #headcanons #batman spoilers

[thankskenpenders]

And now for something new

So, here's something I was never planning on doing, but I just couldn't shake the idea... Thanks Ken Penders is gaining a sister blog featuring an entirely different comic franchise!

Introducing... Thanks Steve Ditko, a blog where I read the Earth-616 Spider-Man comics, starting all the way back in the '60s! It's gonna be much more casual and less thorough than how I run things here on TKP, though, which I'll explain in a sec.

If seeing me post weird bits from old Spider-Man comics sounds fun and you need no further info, then just head right on over to Thanks Steve Ditko. But for longtime TKP readers, I know you probably have questions...

Number one: Why?

Spider-Man's always been my favorite superhero, and with the Spider-Verse movies kicking ass and my excitement building for the new Insomniac game, I've been in a Spidey mood. Inevitably, a thought occurred to me: Maybe I should actually read the comics that everything else is built off of and see the wildly varying contributions of all the original creators, rather than filtering them through big budget adaptations. If I can power through One Piece and all these other manga with hundreds of chapters, it can't be that hard... right?

And, well, after a few issues I quickly realized that my options were to either clog up my other accounts with random Spider-Man panels for years, or to just make a side blog. And so the side blog was born.

Two: Will this blog replace Thanks Ken Penders?

NO!!!!!!!!!

Okay but prove it

To allow the two to exist side-by-side, Thanks Steve Ditko will have a different format than what Thanks Ken Penders developed. Rather than an in-depth guided tour that critically analyzes every story beat of every issue, TSD will just be a place for amusing panels and brief thoughts as I casually read the comics at my own pace.

If you've seen me make a few tweets about reading Spider-Man recently, I'm basically just moving that to a dedicated Tumblr. It's a place for me to dump these things so that it doesn't fill up my media tab on Twitter for the next decade. (You know, assuming Twitter is still around in a decade.) There will be many issues where I only post two panels that I thought were funny. There will be issues where I don't have anything to say at all. Maybe I'll reach a run that I just cannot get into, and I start skipping around more. Who knows!

This may sound similar to what I thought this blog would be before it blew up. Aside from the simple fact that there's already mountains of Spider-Man commentary out there and therefore less of a void for me to fill, one of the main steps I'll be taking to avoid repeating the past is not enabling an ask box on TSD. I do not need people to ask me to go into ten times more detail on everything. I do not need to write seven essay-length responses to questions about Spider-Man minutiae every day. I do not need a place for people to chide me for not covering certain scenes, issues, or ancillary series.

It also won't have any kind of update schedule. I'm trying to keep it very casual. I'm reading these comics at my own pace, and if I feel like sharing a moment or commenting on something while doing so? It goes there. That's it.

(On the subject of format changes, I'm also listing the issue, writer, and penciller in the body of every post. This is a thing I wish I'd done on TKP so that people didn't misattribute every weird Archie Sonic panel I post to Penders.)

Three: So when will TKP come back from hiatus? You said it'd come back after you finished SLARPG!

I don't know! Sorry. I have a couple things on the backburner right now for TKP, but I'm not sure when I'll get back to proper updates where I read more comics.

I wanted to bring TKP back this year, and that's still possible. The main hurdle is that I want to reread my own archive (again) as a refresher, which is, uh. A lot of posts. I've developed a high standard for myself on here, and I feel like I wouldn't be doing my job right if I forgot half the ongoing subplots and character arcs and didn't bring them up in my analysis. Especially when I'm discussing the work of an author as obsessed with continuity as Ian Flynn. Unfortunately, the nature of this blog means that every time I go on another long hiatus for Life Reasons I have even more comic continuity to catch up on than last time.

(This is a big part of why I'm making Thanks Steve Ditko an extremely casual blog instead of promising to become a Lore Expert on 60+ years of Marvel.)

Mostly I've just been very burnt out this year after having finally finished a video game that took almost eight years to make. I haven't really had the energy for any creative projects, including TKP. But I feel a little bit of a spark here with Spider-Man, so I'm chasing that feeling to try to get back into the swing of blogging about comics - no pun intended.

So, basically, bear with me on this as I start this low-energy side project. But hopefully folks will enjoy Thanks Steve Ditko as its own thing, too.

Look forward to goofy shit like this

#tkp post

[jambeast]

Anyone know what the deal was with that Canadian residential school thing? A lot of people described finding graves and darkly hinted at them as being like... murder camps, where the children were sent to presumably be lined up against a wall and shot or something to that effect

And I’m not sure if there’s much to say they were murder camps so much as, like... kids just fucking died back in history-times. Especially children at Orphanages. And you couldn’t just leave them lying around so you buried them. 1800′s orphanages (especially in cold countries) are pretty famous for being miserable and tragic.

I guess sending a kid to an orphanage when you don’t need to back in the 1800′s was, like... similar to murder. Like you increased their chances of dying due to starvation/disease before puberty from like 40% to 60%. Like a 20% Marginal Murder Rate Increase.

I dunno, it’s one of those tricky things where like, it looks like a lot of people are mischaracterising an event, but the event was still really really bad anyway, but just not the same level of bad. It’s like if a bunch of people were insisting that 600 million Jews died in the holocaust and you couldn’t try and get them closer to the actual 6 million figure without feeling like a genocide denier. You don’t want to be the guy to be Defending something really bad, but also you wanna be clear on what actually happened. All the messaging I saw around it when the story came out was mostly Dark Hinting - a few snippets and numbers implying something dreadful and then the assumption that the reader would be too filled with rage to read any more.

[twig-tea]

Lately I’ve been feeling like Thai bl is truly all over the place with so many shows airing at once and some of the best ones flying under the radar while discourse is focused on a couple of the big messy ones. I think you’re the only person I know who is actually watching ALL of them and has been here for the whole evolution of the genre, so I’m curious what stands out to you about this current moment. Do the shows feel different to you? Is the way fandom is interacting with them changing? And what are your current favs?

I ended up writing a thesis, sorry friend lol To be fair to me there are 3 questions in there, all of them meaty! I've done my best to give a sense of where I'm at with Thai BL and how it feels like it's changed over time.

Caveating all of this: I am just one fan who I'm sure has had specific experiences that will colour my opinion, also a lot of this is just vibes so I'm open to being told I've forgotten something major or misremembered what it was like! If you are reading this and your opinion or experience is different please share, with stuff like this I'm always interested in hearing about differing opinions because the fandom experience will depend at least partly on where you hang out. For years, my main fandom space for BL was the YouTube comments section (RIP me).

Overall feel

Honestly, things overall don't feel all that different to me in Thai BL in particular, even though I'm about to talk about a lot of changes and ways it actuallyd does feel very different below lol And after reflecting about it, I think it's because these things still feel very much in flux, in a way that they've felt in flux this entire time. Producers are still figuring out the best funding and distribution models and merch models to make money; creators are still calibrating how queer these shows can be and still be popular; actors are still figuring out how to do BGP (business gay performances) without having fans interfere in their private lives off the clock. Writers are still trying to figure out how to write 12-episode arcs that don't drag in the middle or fumble the ending (which is also not new). The tension between established ships, fan expectations, and genre requirements has honestly been there almost the whole time, though the reverberations of missteps is louder now because of the larger fanbase that is (comparatively) more plugged in to live viewing. The core question in BL has always been 'how do we make this marketable', and that unsurprisingly hasn't changed, though the answer to that question has over time, if that makes sense?

Shows

Do the shows feel different? As a whole, I'd say yes. The biggest differences are of course total quantity and overall quality, but the actual distribution of % of shows that have high(er) production values (i.e. quality) feels close to the same--it was close to 50/50 in the late 2010s and now is maybe more like 40/60 with a higher percentage coming from more smaller production companies. But the numbers we're talking about are something like 15 shows in e.g. 2018 and something more like 50 shows in 2023 (being vague because there are shows that people could argue over whether they should count). The quality overall has increased, even the pulps look better, sound better, and tend to feel a little bit more put together than the pulps of even 2020 (please note that these are all relative qualifiers, most of these shows are still not objectively good). 2020 in particular was a watershed moment for high production value BLs; we get colorists and special effects artists, and sometimes decent sound production now!

There has also been an improvement in terms of what is depicted and how certain subject matter is treated very generally, though I think that's still in flux. Things like evil ex girlfriends are less common than they were and the women in BL are more likely (in general, still not always) to be treated as realized characters. We've gotten more and better femme representation in ensemble shows, and the "gay for you" trope is much less common. Consent is now considered sexy and is much more common than it was; non-consent as "sexy" has eroded and is much less common. Things that used to happen in almost every BL now happen in a much lower percentage. I also feel a little bit less worried about some of the actors on pulp sets because there is more general scrutiny about things like minor actors, intimacy coordination, BGP (business gay performance) expectations, and sexual exploitation. Overall, show recommendations these days come with fewer caveats.

The assumption that if you worked with someone on a BL once you would stay with them as an established pairing was surprisingly early in BL; I don't know if it's just because there were a few shows that had side pairings then get main shows, so the actors did work together on a few shows in a row, which made them feel established, or whether it's because the BGP started early to build hype both before and after shows aired, or whether audiences just made homophobic assumptions about how if two actors had chemistry they had to be gay for each other, and otherwise nobody would want to "play gay" more than once, or would want to have to kiss too many other men....in any case, there were huge scandals and blow-ups around this in BL on even the earliest shows, and some early shows were snubbed because of the pairing alone. Similarly, it was established very early in BL (i.e. 2016-17) that an unhappy ending for a pair would result in your show being panned; cheating was also a guaranteed flop in BL circles (though some ensemble shows that had gay relationships in them such as Friend Zone did fine with cheating plots and unhappy endings). Overall it feels like some things were only depicted in early Thai BL and creators have avoided them since due to the audience reception at the time. I will say, generally, that there have now been enough examples of people in a "branded pair" moving on to a new pair or multiple shows, that it feels less like a death knell to a BL career if one of the actors says they no longer wanted to make BLs, or if they switched companies.

I pay a lot of attention to queerness in BL, and that has changed a little bit too, though not in the way I expected. I had been expecting a more clear and steady trajectory in BL, but we've instead had real swings, and I've realized there will just always be shows that feel more or less actually gay or queer than others, and that's ok. Early Thai shows really spoiled us for good queer content, GayOK Bangkok and Diary of Tootsies are still shows by which i measure what we get now, and both of those are from 2016. I would say that more "mainstream" BL (i.e. by one of the major production companies) hit what turned out to be queer saturation around 2020 and that's where I was most surprised not see a more clear trajectory; rather than things getting more queer from there, I'd say a greater percentage of shows overall feel more queer, but we haven't (and I now suspect won't) reach the queerness we had in Thai tv in 2016. That being said, my secret running list of things I want to see in BL gets shorter every year as entries get crossed off, so I would say the range of queer experience is slowly getting captured as more content continues to be made by a wider range of production houses (PrEP being mentioned in a mainstream show is my white whale).

I know some people assume that shows are higher heat now overall, but I don't think that's true. I do think Thai television producers and directors have overalll gotten better at capturing sensuality, and acting workshops have improved chemistry-building overall too. But from what I can tell the ratio of high head and low heat content is still pretty similar to what it's always been, maybe slightly higher (e.g. at a quick glance I'd guesstimate 30% of shows had a sex scene in 2018 vs 40% in 2023).

Fandom

The main differences in fandom from the really early days and now are the ways we, as international fans, are able to engage with each other, with thai audiences at the same time, and with content creators, and the entitlement that comes with that. In the 2010s we were almost always watching after Thai airing, with either fansubs or, later, official subs, trailing online releases by days or weeks, which themselves may have trailed the Thailand airing date by days or weeks or sometimes even months. That became less true around 2019ish, and especially in 2020 when I think Thai producers were desperate to reach audiences during the start of the pandemic (and when audiences were desperate for something to distract us from what was happening in real life).

As a fan in the mid-late 2010s, watching something was either unofficial via a fansubber, or you were wading through hundreds of Thai comments to find anyone else writing about the shows in English. Now, it's actually rare we don't have immediate international distribution, though it may be paid. If the subs are not up at the same time as the official upload, even on free sites, fans get furious. It's a bit surreal to see people complain about waiting a few hours for subtitles, especially on YouTube, when we sometimes waited months for a series to finish being subbed (not to say people didn't complain back then too, because they sure did! But there were fewer international fans overall, and it wasn't an expectation that there would be subs, so fewer people complained when it happened). This meant that a lot of people only watched shows when they were complete, and people were not watching with any kind of synchronicity.

With international fans moving into simultaneous watching with Thai audiences, we suddenly had the chance to talk about shows as they were airing and affect the conversations about them and even, sometimes, the decisions. Folks seem to have differing opinions about what makes a BL, and what makes a BL good, and they are vocal about when a show doesn't meet their standard. This has always been true, but the strong opinions have more of an effect on the discourse when they're expressed in real-time to the show being aired. Also, when we have literally 3x the number of Thai shows being aired (nevermind other countries which have also increased), it seems so much more egregious to me to complain if a single show doesn't meet your particular taste. Just go watch something else! That was less possible in 2016, but now nobody has any excuse lol Please note here that I'm not saying shows should not be criticized. But when you have one loud faction saying shows should have nothing but innocent kisses if any skinship at all and showing more is distasteful and possibly homophobic, and another faction saying a show should be panned if they don't have at least one sex scene and if there is no good kiss it's homophobic, I don't know where that leaves content creators but I see the tension and how it sometimes results in my least favourite tropes like "blushing maiden" even after a couple has canonically had sex. These factions have always existed in BL fandom, this is not new, they just both seem particularly silly now with so much content to choose from.

The shows that get attention and the shows that get snubbed feel the same too, in all honesty. You can ask yourself the following questions:

Is the show a little slower paced?

Are the story beats less melodramatic?

Do its characters feel more human?

Do they feel more queer?

Is it a comedy?

Is there any risk of an unhappy ending?

Do people not think one of the lead actors is hot?

Do people ship one of the lead actors with someone who isn't his costar?

Do people have to do anything other than go to YouTube to watch it?

If the answer is yes to any of those questions, and especially to the last one, fewer people will be watching, even if the show is good. That's always been true. [Shows I'm thinking about when I say that: Make it Right, He's Coming to Me, My Ride, You're My Sky, Oxygen (though the sides in this one are also at fault), YYY, Something in my Room, Ghost Host Ghost House, Dear Doctor I'm Coming for Soul, Cooking Crush.] All this is to say, there have always been shows that have been ignored, though I agree with you OP that with more shows airing, more are being ignored at any given time.

The other thing is that when a show is good, it doesn't necessarily invite discourse. The messes are often what encourage people to dig in, fill in gaps, linger in the adrenaline. The part that does feel different is also related to the increase in genre BLs; genre stuff in general tends to get more attention in fandom spaces, and the way people are functioning as fans feels different in that they're bringing the way they interact with genre content to BL as BL has started having larger and better funded genre content. I'm thinking about those early genre BLs like He She It, My Dream, Love Poison, Golden Blood, So Much In Love, Why R U....we started getting genre shows in BL in I think 2017 and basically had 1-2 a year until 2020ish and then it increased from there; and the ones that had funding and decent distribution got engagement until they started going off the rails, and then they had even more engagement and then fell off. I don't think it's a coincidence that the shows last year that got people to write meta were La Pluie, Be My Favorite, and I Feel You Linger in the Air. When a show is building a world, there's more to say and interrogate about it, and when a genre show fails, it can fail more spectacularly than a regular romance story. The most popular BL shows used to all be straight-up BL bubble romances, but I think genre shows really started to take over a greater percentage of the popular spots in 2022 and 2023. Again, the main difference here is that there used to be 1-2 stand-out shows per year, and now there are closer to 6+ per year, and as we got more stand-out shows the variety of what type of show stood out as popular has expanded. I do think the overall percentage of shows that are more standard romance plots has reduced, partly because Thai production companies are running out of popular y-novels to adapt. So I'm anticipating we'll continue to get more genre content going forward, and maybe a higher percentage of original works too.

Shows I'm Enjoying Right Now

Right now, the Thai shows airing that I'm watching are:

Cooking Crush

Dead Friend Forever

Cherry Magic Thailand

City of Stars

The Sign

Playboyy

PitBabe

7 Days before Valentine

For Him

Of those, I'd currently most recommend Cooking Crush as a generic BL recommendation. Dead Friend Forever is very good, but is not a romance and is difficult for some to watch (there are a lot of dark themes in addition to the gore and scary bits).

Cooking Crush is doing so many things I love. I've written about the way it's set up its major conflict to be amongst the friend group here, and way the show is depicting communication between the two main characters and how they improve their communication with one another as they get closer here. Two of my biggest BL pet peeves are a conflict for the sake of a dramatic penultimate episode that ignores or retcons a character's growth or the building of trust that a couple has already gone through in the series, so the fact that this show is working so hard to establish strong communication between its leads and then setting up the significant drama to actually about friendship rather than romance is something I cannot overstate my excitement about. To tie this back into what I wrote above, this reminds me of Diary of Tootsies and I mean that in the best possible way.

Dead Friend Foreever is, like I mentioned above, not a romance; it's a slasher horror melodrama with a very well established mystery, an ensemble cast of mostly hateable characters (which I admit isn't usually my thing, but since they're likely all going to die as a result of the genre they're in I'm finding that more tolerable than usual, and there is at least one character I like). DFF did a great job of structuring the story for the ultimate payoff of information reveals. There are a lot of shows that have been messing with non-linear storytelling recently, Cooking Crush being one of the ones that actually does this poorly in my opinion, but Dead Friend Forever effectively uses non-linear storytelling so that we find out important pieces of information about particular characters at a time when that information will have the most emotional impact on what is happening in the "present" of the storyline. Every time there is a reveal, it informs what we've already seen, recontextualizes it, and means we understand some of the character motivations and actions differently from when we saw them the first time. I mentioned above that there are dark themes in this show; one of the things that I really like about this show is that the impact of class is not glossed over, and that the consequences of these events feel very real for the characters; people do terrible things in this show, but these actions are not treated lightly by the show itself.

You'd think these two shows would have nothing in common, but there are things that they share that put them both in my top category. Generally, in both of these shows, the character arcs are clear and logical; when a character does something, even if I don't like the action itself, I can understand exactly why they that and can see how it matches where they are in their arc at the time. The shows show change in characters as a result of what they experience, and the relationships in this show really matter. When characters start acting in ways that feel out of character or against their own arc because they have to in order to drive the plot forward, I struggle to remain invested; that's not happening with either of these shows. Both of these shows also treat serious topics with seriousness, and consequences for actions are real and felt by the characters in the show (and if someone gets away with something, the show is clear that this is not just). Nothing has happened that hasn't been signalled or implied earlier. Both shows also have clear class consciousness and represent the disparity caused by classism in a critical/harsh light.

Whew! I think I got to everything you asked. Thanks again for the extremely interesting question!

#ask game #bl meta #long post #typed so that I can stop thinking it #fandom meta #multi bl #thank you for the ask!

[rudeflower]

JESS ANGST SCHOOL ANGST COMPLEX TRAUMA ANGST

In Keg Max! Principal Merton tells Jess he has missed 31 days of school. Now that makes him a chronic truant for sure, it means he's missed more than 10% of the school year, the standard school year is 180 days. Let's say there's 10 days left in the school year.

That's a LOT of school to miss. Young people improbably here, do not miss that much school

But relative to what we're being told about Jess, it's a weirdly low number? Jess never goes to school!!!! He's working 10000 hours at Walmart instead of going to school no school never heard of him!

That means that Jess attended school 139 days. Most schools I've worked with define that as a certain number of hours attended, more than half the day. So even if he was skipping that's 139 days he went to more than half the day NOT GOOD AT ALL BUT

Even after he was eighteen (early in the school year) he still laced up his boots and showed up somewhere he hated at saw no point in going to WHY!!????

First of all this is actually a ridiculously overcommitted young person let's at least acknowledge that.

He works before school at Luke's, and he works in the evenings too, closing up at 11:30 in one episode. Not just filling coffee mugs anymore. By season 3 he's closing alone, keeping tabs on the delivery schedule and capable of (furiously) running the morning rush alone.

AND he's working 45 hours a week at Walmart doing physical work, AND (poorly) maintaining a romantic relationship, AND reading obsessively, AND YES GOING TO SCHOOL! Jess starts working at Walmart in November (if you treat the air date as the canon date with the show roughly does), combined with Luke's it's probably 60-65 hours a week and still went to school 139 days!

He's making ridiculous choices because he is a tiny little fool but also has a trauma soaked brain

Jess chooses to be maxed out every minute of his life because he cannot tolerate being unoccupied, like a lot of people with complex trauma (and ADHD and Autism and more all of which could apply to Jess but rn I am talking about complex trauma)

When someone is used to chaos in their environment they actually feel less safe when things are quiet and still. It leads to someone who needs to have their RAM at 100% every waking AND sleeping moment

So they work 65+ hours, go to school most days, and they

cannot relax without extreme stimulation AKA needing the music on to sleep

Walk while reading because walking and looking ahead isn't enough is not occupied enough need more occupied

and starts reading the second he's stops talking to someone or using his hands to do something else. Reading as default in any given second.

He reads compulsively, no matter how chaotic the environment.

Reading ALSO isn't enough must be annotating and analyzing too passive reading is NOT ENOUGH

So Jess would rather show up at school for 139 days where other people are moving around, where there are fights to get into and classes to move to and from, even after he's an adult and Luke wouldn't find out that he isn't showing up. He'll show up to a test just to be in the classroom, not to take it.

This is not mentioning what I'm too lazy to screencap, that he's always doing something. that especially when he's talking to Luke Jess is constantly and doing things with his hands constantly.

There's really only one time we see Jess sitting still doing almost nothing

But not really nothing because smoking really is something.

My dude needs to be as occupied as possible from the time he wakes up all the way up to and including when he falls asleep to stay occupied and all that he's got on hand is going to a school that says the pledge of allegiance in six different languages then he will go! It's 100%%% occupation or the horror of possibly relaxing and WHAT WOULD HAPPEN THEN

#if you are reading this thinking “well of course he goes to school he has to” #you are thinking with your brain on not Jess's #he is of legal age and can drop out AND lock Luke out of school communications #luke is very bad at keeping tabs on him and jess knows it #you can do whatever you want when you think no one cares what you do and jess does not need to go to school her doesn't need to do 149 days #I AM ADDICTED TO THESE POSTS!!!! #gilmore girls #gilmore girls meta #jess mariano

[bekkathyst]

I know it might be kind of personal, and you might not be willing to share this online, but do you have a number that would get you out of the negatives where you'd be able to keep going?

I've been following you for years, probably longer than anyone else I've followed on here, and I'd hate to see you have to give this up.

Hello 🙏❤️

Thank you so much for the question and the concern, it means a lot.

I don’t mind answering this, but the answer is kind of long and complicated, so please bear with me.

Right now we’re about $3,000 behind on important bills and that’s my main concern.

But, the other problem is that we need to have a bare minimum income of 3.000€ every month here in order to appease the Austrian government when it comes to my husband’s residence permit.

But of course that is the actual profit we need to have, so the monthly sales from the business need to be much more than that. This is a big reason why I’m trying to create more ways to make some money that don’t require shipping or spending so much money on inventory that just sits in our house. Since the Austrian post raised their prices, it costs us 20€ to ship a small envelope, and 25€ to ship a small package. So you can see why this ended up causing so many issues for us… a package of $60 with free shipping would cost us 25€ to ship out and then we’d barely break even after the cost of the crystals and shipping/packing supplies.

So my hopes here are that after I get rid of the free shipping (and replace it with a reduced shipping instead, most likely $15), focus heavily on the open box option so people can build their orders up to make it worth the shipping price, and I can incorporate other ways of making money than just selling crystals, I’ll be able to get back on my feet. I do think it can work out, especially if the sales I have planned this month go well and people are okay with the changes.

Last year when the shipping prices drastically increased, I was so afraid of changing the free shipping offer because I thought everyone would be upset, but based off of all the recent feedback I’m so grateful that it seems like a lot of people are okay with it 😭🙏 I feel silly for not doing anything earlier, because it really is a big factor as to why we’re in such a bad spot now.

#ask

[mygreatadventurehasbegun]

Something I’ve been thinking about lot lately are movies that I would introduce to people who haven’t seen many (or any) movies from Classic Hollywood.  If a friend came to me and asked me to recommend old movies, what would I choose?

What do I consider Old Hollywood “gateway movies”?

*Originally was going to stick to movies made before 1960, but one 60′s movie could not be ignored.*

Roman Holiday

I’ve heard this referred to as a “reverse Cinderella story” and I think that’s a great description.  It’s about a woman who just wants to get away from her stressful life and have fun...even if for only one day.  It really has it all...it’s lighthearted, funny, romantic and bittersweet.  And while these are in no particular order, this would probably be the first movie I’d suggest to someone.

On The Waterfront

To me, this works as a great introduction because it actually is a bit of a transition movie for Hollywood...and by that I’m referring to the acting style.  Nearly every actor in this movie came from The Actor’s Studio, bringing the more grounded, realistic approach to acting that modern audiences are used to (compared to the more presentational style of the 30′s and 40′s).  So, this movie is a great way to ease them into Old Hollywood.  And the story still feels relevant today...trying to find the courage to stand up to the big guy who has his foot on the back of everyone’s neck...and risk alienating your friends in the process.

The Adventures of Robin Hood

Of course, I was going to recommend this one!  This movie is just...so much fun...even if a person is new to Classic Hollywood, they are guaranteed to find something they like about this one.  Even if it’s just the swordfights or the score...but honestly, everyone I’ve shown this to has really enjoyed it (even people who don’t like adventure movies).

Casablanca

Yes, this seems like an obvious choice, since it’s one of the greatest movies ever made.  But there’s a reason for that.  The acting, directing and writing are iconic and you really can’t ask for more.  Plus, one of the main points of the story is about sticking it to the Nazi’s.  I think we can all (hopefully) agree that that’s a point in this movie’s favor.

12 Angry Men

Another movie that still feels timeless and relevant even after all these years.  It discusses themes of class, parent/child relationships, justice, ignorance and so much more, you’d believe it was written today.  And the performances from every single actor in that room is outstanding...there are some scenes that are so electric as you feel the tension rising.

How to Steal a Million

Another Audrey movie!  This is a perfect option is someone wants to watch a fun, fluffy comedy.  It’s light and relatively low-stakes...it almost feels like a send-up of heist movies, except they don’t wink at the camera.  It’s just that instead of stealing something because the fate of the nation depends on it, or to stick it to the man...Nicole just wants to steal back something she already owns.  And the way they go about it is absurdly hilarious.  The chemistry between our two leads helps a lot, as they are so much fun to watch.

Summer Stock

If I was only going to recommend one musical from back then, I’d have to recommend Summer Stock!  Not just because it’s one of my favorites, but because I do think it’s a fairly good choice to ease someone into older musicals.  It’s not super elaborate and grand...no Busby Berkely musical numbers or elaborate sequences...just a bunch of people trying to put on a show.  And the love story between Joe and Jane feels so real and grounded...no love at first sight, no enemies to lovers...just two people who happen to be perfect for each other, and were lucky enough to meet.  This is Gene Kelly and Judy Garland at their best and I want other people to see it.

Rear Window

And if they wanted to see a Hitchcock movie, but maybe aren’t super into horror...I think I’d start them off with Rear Window.  This isn’t a traditional scary movie...as with most Hitchcock movies, it’s all about the tension.  But it isn’t released with jump scare and music stingers.  And around the tension, you have this romantic drama between James Stewart and Grace Kelly, which is so fun to watch (and we can’t forget Thelma Ritter and her one-liners!)

And once they become hooked, the next round of films I’d suggest would be: A Streetcar Named Desire, The Maltese Falcon, Psycho, The Philadelphia Story, The Heiress, Gentlemen Prefer Blondes, and Meet Me in St. Louis.

Any that you would add?

#roman holiday #rear window #summer stock #on the waterfront #the adventures of robin hood #how to steal a million #casablanca #12 angry men

[spencerrxids]

memories

pairing : sparrow!ben hargreeves x fem!reader, past!umbrella!ben hargreeves x fem!reader

genre : angst, heartwarming, hurt-comfort

warning : prepare your tissue if you’re attached to umbrella!ben ig

summary : in which she found glimpse of them together through his eyes—the man that wore the face of the love of her life

wordcount : 3k

a/n : inspired by the song glimpse of us by joji. and i am aware that there are a lot of stories especially these days. If there are resemblance between this story with others then that is completely out of my control. great minds thinks alike after all. requested by @torchioethan i’ll try my best to interpreted the song to their relationship. the story is up to your interpretation by the way. on my remus lupin angst i wrote “some endings are meant to he interpreted differently.” also do you think this is ooc for sparrow!ben? cause this is what i think he’ll act like in this situation. also i put some addie larue reference in this iykyk

masterlist

Have you ever lost someone and then you just feel like you see that someone everywhere? Every place, every street, everyone, reminds you of the memories you hold dearly close to your heart no matter how hurt it is to remember for you refuse to ever forget about it. It hurts so much it does, but that’s the price you have to pay.

The first time she saw him again after going back from the 60s with the dysfunctional bunch of siblings, she thought she was dreaming. Perhaps, it’ll be easier if it were just a dream. Cause now she has to look at the face—at the body of someone who once had loved her and found nothing. A stranger with the face of the love of her life.

Same name. Same face. Different memories.

But does it all even matter now? The world is ending in hours. She could meet her Ben again, that only if he really does exist. She has never been the one to fully understand the concept of time and Five doesn’t speak in a language that she is capable of understanding.

She raised her glass of champagne in Luther’s direction as he danced with his newfound love before averting her gaze to take a look around the room. Diego and Lila being in each other's arms. Klaus being Klaus. Five who seem to be enjoying his time with the number of empty glasses on his table. And lastly, him. Sitting on the table far back from everybody else, drinking quietly as his eyes, too, roamed around the room. Even from a distance between the two, she could tell that he was judging all of them silently.

Slowly she rose and walked toward him with her glass wrapped around her fingers. Once she arrived at the spot, she gestured to the seat next to him. “May I?” Without hearing any response from him, she sat herself on the seat, putting her glass on the table. “The party is over there yet you distance yourself from the others, emo boy.”

He rolled his eyes at the nickname she gave him. “If anyone here is emo that would be your brother. All brooding, laying down alone in my room, wearing nothing but black.” He looked over at Viktor and she followed his line of gaze. “First, Viktor isn’t emo, and second, you just prove my point here.” She gestured to his situation right now. “You just described yourself.”

The look in his eyes was nothing like her Ben as he glared at her, glass tightly wrapped around his fingers. “Look, if you’re going here just to brag about your oh-so-perfect Ben. The others had took their chance every time they passed me so don’t even bother.” He leaned forwards to her—trying to somewhat looking intimidating as she looks at him, totally unfazed by it.

“No.” She leaned closer to him as he leaned back, clicking her glass with his. “That is a too sensitive topic for me to talk about. Actually, I was trying to give you some company.”

“Well, I don’t need your company.” He talked back.

She leaned her back on the seat. “Too bad. I’m already comfortable sitting here.”

“Then I’ll just go away from here.” He got up, looking at her irritatingly, clearly annoyed by her presence. Turning around he began to walked away from the girl that has been haunting his mind, but then she said something that made him stop. “You know you don’t want to, Ben. You wished to stay here. You want someone to tell you to stay. So here I am doing you a favor by saying this.”

Walking back towards her, he pointed his finger right in front of her face, a look of exasperation plastered on his face. “You stay out of my head. Don’t even try to use it on me.” He said. “You think you know me. You know nothing about me. Nothing. I don’t need your company and I most certainly don’t need your pity. I don’t need you.”

Her gaze softened at his words, his last words may hurt a part of her but it was nothing she hadn’t heard before. “I don’t need my powers to know what you’re thinking, Ben. Besides, it never works on you. Not on you. Not on any version of you, I suppose.” She looks back to her glass, avoiding his gaze before feeling him walking away from her.

***

Looking at Luther and Sloane, she offered them a large smile. “I’m happy for the both of you. Wish we could have more time to know each other, Sloane.” She said, eyes falling onto the girl that is wrapped around Luther’s arms before looking back at the sky that is torn apart every second that passed. “With the world ending, there’s nothing anyone wants more than spending time with their loved ones. I know I would do the same.” She could feel Luther’s eyes on her as she said that. “Cherish the time you have left together, okay?” That were the last words she uttered before she went back inside the building, leaving the newlywed to have their moments alone.

What she didn’t know was the fact that Ben was listening to her words as he finally succeed to get rid of Klaus’s presence. He was about to grab another drink when he heard her saying that. Spending time with their loved ones. What is left of his family are only Sloane and Reginald. One who is currently with the man of her life. The other one probably conspiring something against someone. Sloane, his sister, what left of his bunch of adoptive siblings, sure there’s a part of him that cares for her although he won’t admit it out loud. On the other side, Reginald doesn’t deserve any love from anyone in the building. An ounce of him may won’t stop trying to prove himself to the guy but he’s sure that there is no love that he holds for the old man.

Before the girl who just entered the building could fully walk passed him, he grabbed her wrist, stopping her in her tracks. She looked at him expectedly, a look of nostalgia flashed for a second. Perhaps it’s the alcohol talking, but the words come out of his mouth without permission at all. “Want a drink?”

She let her hand out of his grasp, raising one of her eyebrows. “Did Klaus really manage to talk some sense into you? Or is it the alcohol talking?” She paused before answering the real question. “The answer’s yes by the way. But not here. Let’s go somewhere else.”

***

“A windowsill?”

“A quite spacious one, yeah.” She put herself in a comfortable position before patting the space in front of her. “Come on. There’s still much room left here.” Rolling his eyes slightly, he sighed before sitting in front of her. Both of them facing each other, on the windowsill as the world out there is falling apart. Her gaze stayed on him as he sat there trying to search for a comfortable position. A nostalgic smile went onto her face. Happiness and sadness all become one as a glimpse of her Ben took over his position for some split second.

A memory from her past.

“Out of every place in this goddamn hotel, you-“ He began to complain.

“Hey, the world is falling apart. Be grateful for a few seconds.” She looked out the window. “Ben would’ve loved this.” She muttered loud enough for him to hear.

“I am Ben.”

“Well, not you. I mean Ben Ben.”

“The other Ben?”

“No. You’re the—Can you just drink it already and try to not be an asshole?” She almost forced the alcohol down his throat if it weren’t for him who already doing that as she spoke before. She looked at him before averting her attention to her glass, muttering under her breath. “Maybe this is a bad idea.”

“Not really. No.” His response caught her off guard as she wasn’t expecting him to even hear her. She pursed her lips, before taking a sip from her glass. “So you do need some company. Is this your attempt to not be alone at the end of the world? Was it because of the speech I gave earlier?” She put it down and then propped her chin on the top of her knee.

This time, he is the one that avoids her gaze, looking at the falling word around them from the window. “I thought you said it didn’t work on me.”

“Just because my powers don’t work on you. Doesn’t mean I’m an idiot who cannot connect the two dots together, emo boy.” She said.

He looks down for a few moments before looking back at her, an uncharacteristic look on his face. “Guess that—guess that makes me a special emo boy or what?” This time he didn’t complain about the nickname. Instead, he said the words that brings a smile to her face. She nodded slowly before leaning back to the window frame and with teary eyes she lets out a chuckle. “What?” He asked, raising one of his eyebrows.

“You’re making it difficult for me to not cry. You see, you’re not supposed to say that. Not with that face.” She paused, taking a deep breath trying to not let the tears out just yet. “Gosh, you don’t just look like him or sound like him. Now, you talked like him. I suppose my prayers are granted in a way. I see you again now. Breathing and alive. Just not—just not the you that I need. It hurts looking into your eyes when all I see is him and yet there is no trace of him in this falling world.”

“What was he like?” His gaze stayed on her, less tense than usual. “Truly. What was he like?” He asked once more.

“What did the others say?” She asked back.

Hesitantly, he answered her question. “He was……kind. Selfless. A tiny dark cloud on a perfect sunny day. A know-it-all. A scold. Most of them-Most of them are bad qualities.” He furrowed his eyebrows together and seems to be frustrated not being able to decipher why the other Ben was so special compared to him. “I’m the Number One. Numero Uno. He wasn’t, was he? All of those praises about him, look how he ended up 6 feet under.”

Brushing over his last comment, she nodded her head. “Well all of them are true. He was a great guy, wasn’t he? One of the best that I ever knew.” Her eyes trailed over the window. “I first met them all when I was around the age of 8 or 9. He was hiding behind Klaus or Number 4 at that moment. He was never been the one to love the public attention but somehow tried to gain mine. I suppose that makes him sweet. After his death, none of us have been the same. All of us were drowning in a sense, well we all have been drowning for a long time. But since that happened, none of us could ever reach the shore.” Her chest got heavy just from thinking of that feeling.

“Where are you now?” He inched closer towards her.

She pursed her lips before letting out a deep breath. “Just floating around, I guess? Not drowning but not completely free either.” She thought about her last interaction with Ben. “Perhaps this is it. With the world ending, I’m getting closer to my final destination.”

Looking back at him, she continued her words. “Ben. He was-He was easier to love out of everyone in that room earlier, out of all the people I’ve known in my whole life. And mind you remember this, I love all of them greatly—well not all of them,” She referred to Reginald. “We all have a fair share of memories together, mostly in our youthful days that are full of trauma created by your daddy dearest—even I had some of mine too and I’m not even a Hargreeves.” Both of them chuckled at her words.

“Very much relatable that last bit. Klaus said a similar thing earlier. About how he was easier to love.” Ben inched closer once more, perhaps this is the alcohol talking, but seeing him open up his feelings to her like this makes her pay no mind to the fact that by tomorrow he’ll probably change into hard-shell Ben again. “That doesn’t seem fair. All of you love him like that yet none can do the same for me.”

Biting back a snarky remark, she decided to say something else instead. “One thing about him is that he makes love seem to be a casual thing to feel, I mean it is, truthfully it is but not many people have the opportunity to realize that.” She wiped a single tear away. “There are a lot of things to pay for when it comes to love. To any kind of love. Meeting you is one of those. The price I have to pay for this moment is not a kind one.”

He nodded quietly before looking back directly into her eyes. “I’m not him, you know?”

She chuckled at his words. “Of course, you’re not. I’ve said that already. If yes then I won’t be just sitting in front of you right now.” I would hold you and never let go like you had wished once before your last moments. The last part remained in her mind. Glimpses of them together flowed around the two, yet she was the only one to remember. “It is a lonely thing, isn’t it? To remember when the other person doesn’t.”

“What if……the other person does?” Her head snapped back towards him as he said so. Letting out a shuddered breath, she opened her mouth to ask what he means by that but she wasn’t able to find her voice at all. Then he continued his words. “You know what sucks, you have all of these memories with your Ben and I-” He took a glance at the sky before looking back at her. “And the only recollection I have about you is the one I had in my dreams. The one that I forgot the moment that I woke up. The one I wished to remember because there’s this feeling that I can’t understand every time I am in that dream.”

“You said all you see when you look into my eyes are him. Yet when I see into yours all I see is you. No other version you. Just you you cause you’re the same one from my dreams. The dreams that left only glimpses in my memory. But then even in those dreams, you were with him, I suppose. That happy feeling was his feelings, it was never mine, to begin with. All this time I was dreaming of someone else’s memories.” Tears stream down her face as she takes in the look in his eyes, the same look he used to give her.

This Ben would never be her Ben. He was already gone from her world. Leaving nothing but the memories that remain in her heart. Nothing but the feeling that she would always feel till the moment she passed. Meeting this Ben had brought heavy feelings to her heart. Makes her yearn to see a glimpse of him in his eyes. And when she found what she was looking for, hurt was all she found. “I’m sorry, Ben.”

He smiled bitterly. “Out of everyone, I thought you hated me the most.” He said. Recalling her avoiding him at all cost during their first interactions when the Umbrella first comes back to the timeline. The look in her eyes when she first laid her gaze on him was one that he will not forget.

She looked at him with sadness in her eyes. “That is an ability that I am not capable of. I cannot afford that. I don’t think I could even if I tried. You’re too much like him. Any version of you they all-well, I’ve only met two of you but you’re much more alike than I thought you do. Your feelings. The way both of you feel, I found it beautiful.”

A comfortable silence engulfed both of them as the two leaned back to the window frame simultaneously. The world is still falling around them. Slowly fading away from reality. Most people are already gone, reuniting with their loved ones on the other side.

“You were right.” His voice makes her look back at him. He offered the palm of his hand to her, so she made up a scissor using her point and middle finger. “I won.” She said with a large smile on her face.

Ben rolled his eyes. “You’re so childish. I couldn’t see why he loved you so much.” He said, clearly lying.

She crossed her arms. “Oh, the alcohol finally worn out? I was enjoying the non-asshole you.”

“Oh shut up.” He hushed her.

“What was I right about?” She waited for his response.

He met her eyes once more. She could tell that he was hesitant about it. “With the world ending, there’s nothing anyone wants more than spending time with their loved ones. Any kind of love.” Her eyes stayed locked with him as she reached for his palm once more, a warm smile on her face.

“Any kind of love.” She replied back.

click for an edit here

click for another one here

new story concept

taglist! @glxssyhexrts @isimpforeveryone @pinkcherrytea @ray-of-sunrise @lodeddiperrodrick @ttaeh @birbtweettweet @gordona424 @wyrd01366 @pro-serpine @bryannabarradas @justaproudslytherpuff @tasmtrilogy @ac-book-nerd-13 @nao-cchi @jasmines-greentea @s1xthirty @corallyink @frxnchxfrxes @sunnsettee @avengersmarauders @glitter-and-gills @ladyofhellhounds @missbeverlyhills @nellie-mars @middle-child-syndrome701 @ttynatmyo @neotechclub @rogerslaufeysonn @divinekokomis @thebloodrobin @hiraeth-maximoff @maizieval @angel0signal @joyfullyswimmingface @kim-an-44 @morecthh @grievingghost @enviousofyoualways @iodinexo @bumbelbeeesblog @r0zu0 @iamyourgender @junsfilter @cherrychaeryoung @ajdahak @bebyyyyyy @sstellari @prissyimagines

#ben hargreeves #ben hargreeves x reader #the umbrella academy #the umbrella academy x reader #ben hargreeves angst #ben hargreeves fluff #the sparrow academy #sparrow ben hargreeves x reader #sparrow ben hargreeves #ben hargreeves imagine #the umbrella academy imagine #angst #heartwarming #song inspired #glimpse of us #tua #joji #sparrow ben x reader

[twbutterfly-milk]

Intro below ⬇️

Dm/comment for post removal. Feel free to suggest posts you would like to see :)

Tw: ED, stats, topics abt health problems and dni if u don't want to engage in a minor's post. I do post some non ED related stuff but i usually have tw if ur worried, so if u wanna see that stuff (examples, recipes, self care during periods/common cold which is coming soon, and weekly cute animal vid reblogs just because i can) then proceed with caution ig

Info abt posts + blog intro below the cut

Any other info can be found in my bio

Upcoming posts:

Hair care (especially with an ED, your hair doesn't NEED to fall out or lose strength I promise) ✅️

Ways to reduce bloating

Natural weight fluctuation ✅️

Easy tips to help you reach your daily water intake goal/ maybe i'll make a post abt how to figure out how much you need per day

Flexible and short workouts that allow u to stay consistent and get results (thinking of doing a thigh gap one first and seeing if i enjoy doing them oe not)

Recipes

Volume eating

Self-care during common cold

Self-care during periods

My little pony themed diets cuz I'm sick and tired of "themed" diets not having anything to do with the actual characters themselves. U can't just put a picture of Pinky pie in front of numbers and call it a pinky pie diet!!!! (Ok, now that i got that off my chest i feel a bit better lol, also i'm doing my little pony ones cuz i love MLP but if u want me to make a themed diet based of a theme u like, don't hesitate to request one)

OMG THE AMOUNT OF PEOPLE I SEE STRUGGLING AND MAKING BINGEING WORSE AS AN ATTEMPT TO STOP IT, i gotta start working on a binge reduction/prevention post (gonna take a while to do but it's ok) so more people know how to properly respond to binges ✅️

Intro to my blog:

Hello! I'm a nerdy, mentally ill MINOR (say it louder for the predators in the back lol) using this mostly as an ED blog. Undiagnosed due to reasons but i def used to have bulimia but i think i might be developing a different one now.

I am using this mainly to post health and safety info rather than just triggering ED stuff but i still do have a few posts abt that, so if ur in recovery, i don't reccomend engaging (recovery is so brave, keep fighting you CAN do this!). I truly do encourage recovery for anyone who can.

My bio has most of the info u need to know.

Despite my fear of carbs, sugars, fats and calories, i do like cake somehow.

Disclaimer: i am NOT any kind of proffessional yet, i will try to post my sources so u can fact check stuff, but i always encourage u to do ur own research too!

PLEASE COMMENT OR DM FOR REMOVAL OF POSTS**BLOCK ME IF U WANT JUST DON'T REPORT**FEEL FREE TO LEAVE SUGGESTIONS FOR POSTS YOU WOULD LIKE TO SEE**THANKS FOR BEING HERE

With that out of the way, my stats are below the cut

Stats:

150cm or 4"11'

(I'll convert the others to lbs when i reach them)

Important info: i'll prob be unable to go below 40kg/88lbs without being forced into recovery (even then it's too much) i try to focus on visual goals more, my current are to get a flat stomach, thin arms and a thigh gap by may/June

Key:☆reached goal □gained back. ■gained extra

Sw:50kg/110lbs

Hw:60'something kg/ >132 lbs (overweight, way before my ED)

Lw:47kg/103lbs (got down then gained a bit when i used to binge all the time)

Cw:50kg/110lbs

49kg/108lbs ☆

48kg/106lbs ☆

47kg

Gw1: 46kg/101lbs (if i reach this, i get to wear the new black top, it's rly hot atm cuz of global warming, so i hope i get here soon, i only set rewards when i'm getting closer to the goal, not that i need rewards but it feels good to be extra nice, gonna try to get slimmer arms tho cuz that top would make me feel insecure when it should make me feel pretty cuz it's a nice top)

45kg

44kg

Gw2:43kg/95lbs

42kg

41kg

Gw3:40kg/88lbs

Ugw: 35kg/77lbs

Thank you for your attention

#ana meal #ana bllog #ana rant #ana trigger #tw ana diary #ed meals #ed not sherran #ed relapse #tw ed sheeran #i just want to be thin #thin$po #thinspp #thinspø #tw thinspi #weight loss #gaining weight on purpose #i wanna lose weight #fat loss

[ewesless]

Quick little thing! No, I was wrong. It became a Very Long Thing...

We know that Diavolo is operating at an entirely different frequency and level of energy from Barbatos and Lucifer and it isn't just because he's a touch starved extrovert with repressed introverts for parental figures friends.* But he might be 18-21.... As a person from the early 90's this is a traumatic realization. I thought he was an early 30s year old manchild to be quite honest.

*love your takes so so so freaking much RadArchives 😭

Utilizes canon compliant relationship dynamics and Diavolo's Lucifer complex. Luke is aged up to cope with fanservice not facilitate it.

I interpreted it as Diavolo was between 10-13 when Barbatos agreed to be his Butler. OM indicates it was 800 years before Barbatos quit feeling angry at Diavolo for the incident (he was teasing). 10,000 is equal to 10 years, so based off my estimate Diavolo would be 18-21. Unless it was 800 plus years then, since Barbatos had time to cool off which would be much more comfortable to me 😂

The canon chronological ages are vague in order for players to have freedom (dads and mom coded old as dirt option through to bratty youngest brother who seems like an angsty and rebellious teen) so just for reference these are the ages I use:

Solomon - 34 (right there in the middle of adulthood and an older brother age bracket with Diavolo. Asmo is robbing his own cradle!)

Simeon - 40 (peers with Lucifer and they are only a few months apart! Perfect adoptive/group dad age of being mature and comforting without being old-old 😭)

Luke - 16 (Again, comfort level. He's a bratty tween, but I can't tolerate the fanservice with him as a 10 year old at all. 16 is a nice middle ground between emotionally charged, discovering self and independence, "I'm grown!" and the complex realities of the world. Him developing THOSE FRUSTRATING AND CONFUSING NEW FEEEEEEELINNNNNNGS are tolerable as well.)

Barbatos - 42 (the answer to life and everything. I'd place him closer to 60 as a foxy and wicked classy grandma older woman gentleman, but he looks like a pretty, young 30-something so this fits the bill. This also goes into my headcanon that Father made him before the angels and long before humanity.)

Diavolo - 33 (an out of touch with the youth and his peers, but still a youthful soul + gap moe)

Belphie and Beel - 25 (still young enough to do underdeveloped maturity and be doted upon baby brothers, but grown enough that they aren't actually immature and know better they just haven't put the effort into developing impulse control and practicing good judgement)

Asmodeus - 27 (pretty and passes easily for 23 but can hook up with the MILFs and DILFs as well as the young 20s. He's young, but not afraid of becoming older, not just because he's beauty everlasting and that skincare routine is ✨️flawless✨️ but because he sees the beauty and attractiveness of maturity and himself)

Satan - 23 (Personal Favorite + Occultic Number! Even though he's as old as Lucifer I feel like he was born at the age that Lucifer was created for additional headcanon reasons.)

Leviathan - 31 (*scoff* "Look at this old loser with a failure to thrive and manchild tendencies" says an old loser with a failure to thrive and the same tendencies)

Mammon - 32 (okay, this would go on for more than a paragraph or few run on sentences 🤣)

Lucifer - THE BIG 40 (caught up between older than the others brother who had to grow up too fast and never got to be young / middle aged surrogate father figure of a house full of rebellious teenaged adopted kids that never got to have his experimental young adult phase...)

Thirteen is a sensitive, trendy young woman so we DON'T ASK THESE QUESTIONS 35 I like an age gap with my ladies~ Candy is 39 (because 4 is associated with death in Japanese and I have a 4 year age gap with my sister which was a perfect combination of generational difference + ability to rebel from the older sibling, angst about idolization and knowing you aren't the same, but aren't meant to be. There's the possibility of strife caused by disappointment(s)/fallen idol for Thirteen and for Candy the pressure of the expectations of parents as first born and the care, protectiveness and responsibility of older sibling for their younger sibling. They're able to rely on each other even though Thirteen is a wild woman antisocial ambivert with a strong personality and even stronger opinions whereas Candy seems like a serious and violently antisocial introvert who conforms and does what she's expected to in all areas of life. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE TELL US WHAT CAUSED THE SCHISM BETWEEN THEM. WHAT HAPPENED WRITERS? WHAT HAPPENED?)

Mephistopheles - 31/35 (I like the idea of him having an age gap of 2 years with Diavolo either as a more mature junior to senior or a senpai who won't notice him because his eyes are set on a raven haired beauty with eyes like firy rubies that is also a heavily overworked deskworker with difficult teen boys and an involuntarily in a fatherly role for Diavolo too.)

Raphael - 39 (One year the junior of Lucifer and Simeon. Because he never rebelled I thought it had something to do with him being a degree separated from Sime and Lucy to Father, but still being close enough to him to be the devoted, but the most conflicted about it, son.)

Michael - 40 (Either he was created before Simeon and Lucifer or after them. He's got something seriously suspicious going on. I feel that it parallels Diavolo's, but instead of a hopeful vision for the future and further developing what his father started Michael's is in a self-serving manner and his personal agenda is founded on the self-perception that he knows better than his Father.)

#obey me #obey me nightbringer #obey me barbatos #obey me diavolo #obey me solomon #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me luke #obey me simeon #obey me thirteen #obey me 13 #obey me mephistopheles #obey me raphael #useless writing

[scientia-rex]

Medicine is a numbers game. I use probability all the time. If you don't understand probability, you'll look at someone with chest pain and have no fucking clue how likely it is that you're looking at a heart attack. You may not even know what the other top contenders are. GERD is common. Anxiety. An angry rib muscle. Lots of options. Most of the time, most chest pain won't be a heart attack, but sometime it'll be something worse--an aortic dissection that's rupturing will kill you even faster than most heart attacks.

I see so many patients who come in with a symptom that the Internet, whether Google or influencers, has told them is associated with this one thing. It's often the thyroid. And yeah! A fucked-up thyroid can cause all kinds of symptoms. But here's the deal: if I check your thyroid and it looks normal, it's probably not your thyroid that's causing the symptoms. It could be something else we understand. It is very often something we don't understand. But the fact that I can tell you modern medicine doesn't understand some process doesn't mean your naturopath or chiropractor or Certified Hormone Expert Influencer does understand it because they have this different way of looking at the body. Look, long, long before I wanted to be a doctor, I wanted to be an herbalist. I'm queer, I'm a woman(ish), I am neurodivergent, I am not The Man. I'm not beholden to the system; the system doesn't care for me and wishes I would sit down and shut up, most days. And I have a background in research science and statistics. I used to have a rubber stamp that said "Denied" and one that said "Approved" and I'd hit piles of paper for research applications at an R-1 university, in triplicate, with my stamps, because I understood research well enough to get a Human Subjects Division job evaluating it. If a naturopathic approach to thyroid worked well, I would be doing it. I'm a utilitarian. I don't give a rat's ass about the theoretical underpinnings of modern medical practice, I want things to work. Ideally I would like to know why they work, too, but hey, we can't always have it all.

So the dozens of patients I get every month who are looking elsewhere for answers, looking to people who don't actually know any better but are good at pretending they do, who pay money for elaborate supplement regimens or unvalidated genetic tests or (my personal least favorite) "memory-improving games," I have to be calm and professional and diplomatic about what I say. I can't say, "That's quack shit." I can't say, "Your favorite influencer is a liar and an idiot." Not just because I'd get lower patient satisfaction scores, but because patients wouldn't believe me, and they would reactively like me less and the other guy more. (You're calling me stupid? You're saying I wasted money? If I believe you're just a shill for Big Pharma, that hurts less.)

It takes years, even decades, to understand how to put together the probability maps. Chest pain in a patient under 40? Highly unlikely to be a myocardial infarction, but not totally impossible, especially if they've been doing cocaine. In a patient over 60? Much more likely. Is the pain crushing? Is it sub-sternal? How long has it been going on? Is it constant, or intermittent? Does the patient smoke? What other health conditions does the patient have? These are all deeply important questions, and I remember feeling overwhelmed by things like this all the time in medical school. It's taken so long to build my knowledge, and my background in research is only tangentially valuable most of the time.

Please don't believe authority just because it looks good. Don't trust people because you want to trust them. Learn about the scientific process, learn how the sausage gets made, and then you'll be in an infinitely better position to know whether this is a "wow! science!!!" or a "wow! science bullshit!" moment.

#the attending dr. kristophine

[fullmoonfireball]

Pikmin 2 Personality Quiz Translation

quick disclaimer: I am not especially fluent in Japanese, I'm just some shmuck trying their best, so take these translations with a grain of salt. especially since there's some i'm really unsure of here.

feel free to play along with this link! or just scroll all the way down to the "results" section at the bottom if you just want to see the descriptions

Thank you for Accessing [This Page]

Ahh, thank you! You came right away. I'm so happy.

Hey... If you don't mind... I could examine your personality!

View Content

(note: there's some usage of katakana in the paragraph where it typically wouldn't be, notably for the pronouns 'watashi' and 'anata', so I decided to bold those.)

Pikmin Personality Quiz

Q1: What is the most important thing in your life?

Friends

Money

Family

......

Myself

Q2: Of the following 5 colours, which do you prefer?

Red

Purple

White

Yellow

Blue

Q3: Who can you not say no to?

My parents

My lover

My boss

Myself

There isn't anyone (None)

Q4: What word best describes your lifestyle?

Fearful

Perky

Heart-pounding

Voracious

Impulsive

(note: these are all onomatopoeia in the original, so an exact translation would be impossible, or at least unreasonable. hopefully this does the job fine.)

Q5: You're flying in a spaceship. What happens to you next?

I crash

I sleep

I explore an undiscovered planet

I fall

I go back home

(note: "I fall" could equally be "I fail". it's hard to say with so little context, but either way it's not good.)

Q6: How much money do you have saved up?

No more than 100 yen

No more than 1000 yen

No more than 10,000 yen

No more than 100,000 yen

More than that! I'm rich!

(I'm here for translations, not currency conversions, but this would be (in USD, since I'm pretty sure most of you are American even though I'm not): $0.67, $6.67, $66.72, and $667.21 respectively. the fact this was probably made for children really shows here.)

Q7: What's your favourite game?

The leisurely Animal Crossing.

Pikmin, of course.

As expected, it's Zelda.

Obviously Mario, right?

Actually, it's none of these.

Q8: What's your favourite creature?

Pellet Posy

Iridescent Flint Beetle

Bulborb

Waterwraith

Pikmin

Q9: What's your LEAST favourite creature?

Beady Long Legs

Titan Dweevil

Bulborb

Breadbug

Bumbling Snitchbug

(note: this quiz seems to specifically be related to the New Play Control version of Pikmin 2, so the inclusion of the Titan Dweevil isn't QUITE as spoilery as it seems on first glance)

Q10: What's your favourite place?

Valley of Repose

Awakening Wood

Perplexing Pool

Wistful Wild

Inside the Onion

Q11: During a space trip, you're met with an accident, and end up shipwrecked on an uninhabited planet. What kind of planet is it?

A jungle planet

A sandy planet

A mechanized planet

A planet of bugs

It's actually Earth

Q12: If were shipwrecked on an uninhabited planet and could only bring one thing with you, what would it be?

My secret safe

My Game Boy Advance

My passbook

Lunch

A novel

Q13: If you were to start a family in the future, how many children would you have?

None

One

Two

I don't know

A lot

Q14: How would you describe your interactions with others?

Passionate

Cool

Devoted

Easy to get carried away

I don't care

Q15: Seriously, how old are you?

10 or less

20 or less

40 or less

60 or less

What a rude thing to ask!

Check your personality!

(note: if you click this button before answering all of the questions, you will get a popup saying "Q[earliest unanswered number] has not been entered.")

RESULTS

Your personality is [most like]...

The President.

Your strength is that you are honest about your feelings. Your energy as a leader is undefeatable.

However, you should maybe consider other people's feelings at least a little bit.

THIS → is the perfect partner for you!

Your perfect match is...

The President's wife.

She's straightforward about her feelings, more so than you.

She always toys with you.

However, that's because she believes in you.

→ Back

(note: I have absolutely zero confidence in that middle sentence.)

Your personality is [most like]...

Olimar.

A hard-working man who loves his family. He is popular among the Pikmin for his leadership.

However, he's a bit unlucky.

THIS → is the perfect partner for you!

Your perfect match is...

Olimar's wife.

No matter how destitute, she will always support you with great love.

There can be no secrets (such as a certain safe) between lovers or husband and wife.

You two can keep it together and not let the recession get to you.

→ Back

Your personality is [most like]...

Louie.

You're not so good at communication. People tend to misunderstand you, and have no idea what you're thinking.

Maybe you should voice your feelings more often?

THIS → is the perfect partner for you!

Your perfect match is...

Louie's nana.

Her narrow eyes make her look like she can't see anything. But trust me, she definitely sees the real you.

Even if it's hard, please indulge her as much as you can.

→ Back

(note: another really hard phrase to translate on the partner pages, yowch. this time, it was the last line of her description.)

Your personality is [most like]...

The Hocotate Ship.

On the outside, talkative to the point of being a blabbermouth.

But on the inside, actually a bit dry.

THIS → is the perfect partner for you!

Your perfect match is...

Mr. Beady Long Legs.

A strong personality that will really shake your heart. Whether it's out of fear or love, your heart will keep thumping.

Once you get over these feelings, a new you awaits...... Probably.

→ Back

(note: because "さん" is gender neutral, this could equally be Ms. Beady Long Legs. hocotate ship yuri, i GUESS.)

Your personality is [most like]...

The Pikmin.

Serious and hard-working. Your strong suit is cooperating with others. The type to thoroughly devote yourself.

But maybe you could assert yourself a little more?

THIS → is the perfect partner for you!

Your perfect match is...

Mr. Bulborb.

It will lead you with a WILD personality.

A big maw awaits you.

Please look forward to some wild kisses.

→ Back

(note: again, could be Ms. instead)

#Rambles Into The Void #Vesper's Translations #Pikmin #anyways i got the hocotate ship and idk how to feel about that