I didn't want to hijack @extasiswings 's post but I also started thinking about Eddie not being around when that man's being dug out, aaand I couldn't stop...
Eddie looks down at his phone in surprise. Buck's ringing him, but he's supposed to be on shift, and if he was just bored in the station house he'd normally FaceTime, or send Eddie a litany of texts about his latest internet deep-dive (the great Canadian maple syrup heist was his latest obsession), but a phone call?
"Hey man, what's up?"
Buck doesn't immediately respond, but Eddie hears the shuddered inhale down the line, and now he's concerned.
Eddie gives Christopher a reassuring smile while he waits for an answer, and nods to his aunt that he's stepping out for a moment before ducking to the front door when he still doesn't get a reply.
"Buck?" he tries again. "Buck, come on, I'm here, okay? What's wrong?"
"I just..." Buck starts, faltering for a moment. "I just needed to hear your voice."
Buck sounds... shattered, honestly, something so much deeper than exhaustion, and the hairs on the back of Eddie's neck stand on edge.
"Talk to me. Did something happen on a call? Are you hurt?"
"No—we're fine, I'm fine," Buck says, but his voice is barely above a whisper and Eddie's not convinced.
"There was... this man got.... Eddie, he was buried alive. And dispatch tracked his phone but they couldn't get a precise location and by the time we started to dig things weren't looking good and—"
Buck's voice is shaking, but now that he's started speaking he can't seem to stop and his words are gaining fervour as he goes on. Eddie can feel his own grip on his cellphone getting tighter and tighter until finally he has to sit himself down on the steps of the front porch to try and catch his own breath. He knows where Buck's head is at—he can't help but go there too.
"—a-a-and I just...I couldn't stop thinking about the well collapse, and dispatch said the guy wasn't answering and I started thinking about trying to get a hold of you on the radio but we couldn't and suddenly I wasn't looking for the vic anymore, I was looking for you. I was back there in the rain and I was clawing at the ground, at the mud, and it felt like there was this vice around my chest and—"
"Breathe, Buck," Eddie interrupts a little desperately at the fear in Buck's voice, "breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth," he says as he tries to follow his own advice. "Take a deep breath, c'mon, do it with me, in for four, hold it—and breathe out for eight, and again..."
For a while there's nothing but a stream of breaths down the phone from the both of them, until finally a long steady exhale is followed by a stuttered, "sorry, I shouldn't have—"
"Don't be stupid, you can always—"
The siren rings out loud down the other end of the phone and Eddie jumps to his feet out of habit before he remembers that he's not actually on shift.
"I've gotta go," Buck mumbles, and Eddie can hear the rustling movements as he's obviously making his way over to the trucks.
"Yeah of course," Eddie says, and continues before he can second guess himself; "come over after your shift in the morning, we can go out for breakfast with Chris."
There's another exhale down the phone, but this one sounds lighter, happier, like it's being chased by a smile, and Eddie feels his own tight chest loosen considerably at the image he's conjured in his head.
"Yeah, that'd be great." Buck says, "I'll see you then."
"Perfect, it's a date." Eddie says, before hanging up.
(His own words don't register for another 30 minutes and by then Buck's already sent a smiley face emoji over text, and Eddie can't find it within himself to regret anything)
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i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him i love him <3
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what happens when we see the panic fizzle on eddie’s face as he tries to hide it so he can focus on anything but the g*n pointed at him and try to get out of this situation alive without another bullet scar but then he sees buck standing across the courtyard of the hospital and suddenly his composure breaks and when it’s all over his best friend’s name tears from his throat just as eddie’s tears from buck’s and they sprint towards each other and they’re clutching at each other so hard that they’re probably leaving marks but we see eddie’s shoulders drop and the fear ease from buck’s face what happens when we see that. then what. where do we go.
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Our Buck in 5.06 🥰
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Thank you so much for your weekly meta. You pick up so much what I would miss otherwise. Your writing about Taylor reminded me of something: when she first appeared it was Chimney who said that Buck dating her is bascially if he dated himself. I guess they are STILL too similiar - hence why T. is more focused on her work and feels guilty for neglecting her bf. in the 5x6 promo she's shot /working/ once again. not surprising but interesting given she's supposed to be Buck signficant other?
Hi Nonnie! Thank you so much for the kindness, I'm always thrilled to know that people have read and enjoyed my meta!
And yes, when they first met back in s2, Taylor was meant to reflect back to Buck the parts of himself that, while not bad in themselves, were the biggest obstacles to him finding a relationship he can be settled in. He was already in the process of changing, so they didn't work out back then, and you're right, even now they still seem to be in a sense too similarly dedicated to their jobs.
Yes, she's shown as reporting in the promo for 506. We'll have to see in what capacity they use her in this ep.
I actually find it most telling they use her in eps 501 and 503. For both eps, keep in mind that the thing where she's featured in an ep as Buck's gf, and since she's a reporter, the show also uses her for some reporting, that's pretty standard for TV shows, it allows them to save a couple of bucks by using the same character for two functions.
Now in 501, Taylor does no reporting, in fact there's someone else who provides voice over reporting as she watches the news. She's only shown with Buck in one scene, and that scene doesn't really advance the blackout plot in any way. It's Karen, in the very next scene, who solves the mystery (letting us know it's a malware attack). So they literally only paid the actress to show in an intimate scene, she's more focused on her job than on Buck.
Ep 503 is telling as well, in that one they only bring her in to report, she's completely absent as Buck's gf. And it's not like the info she's reporting is anything the audience needs in order to figure out what's going on, they actually paid the actress just so Buck could be shown alone in his loft, uttering that very ironic "hi honey, I'm home."
My point is, this is a very deliberate choice, they're featuring her just to show that something is lacking between her and Buck. That normally doesn't go away unaddressed on TV dramas. So yes, I'm reinforcing what you said.
Let's not forget, with most people, Buck's job would get in the way in some capacity. It was true with Ali, and signs point to it being true again with Taylor. Interestingly, Buck DOES admire dedication to one's job, that's been made pretty clear over the seasons. But do you know who's someone that he admires, someone who's dedicated to his job, good at it, won't get scared of Buck being similarly dedicated to a dangerous job, in fact someone who gets why Buck has to do what he does, and with whom both of them being so dedicated to what they do won't result in a conflicting schedule and lack of personal time to spend together?
I'm just saying, the show repeatedly builds them to be each other's perfect partner.
Thank you again, Nonnie! Sending tons of love your way! xoxox
And to anyone who sent me an ask, I am going through all of them, thank you so much for your patience! If you wanna check whether I've replied to yours yet, you can have a look at my ask tag. xoxox
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Buck: I’m leaving the 118
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I just realized 911 has a pattern of waiting an entire season for these characters to really talk about the trauma they went through if it doesn’t happen right away. Chimney’s rebar accident happened in 1x03 and he came back and seemed fine and didn’t get to talk about and face it until Stuck which was 2x04. Athena was attacked in 3x17 and didn’t talk about it with Bobby until 4x14. I fear we may have to wait til the end of the season for Eddie to truly open up about the shooting.
First of all, god bless you anon for recognizing this pattern and NOT saying it's unrealistic. Because it is extremely realistic for trauma to play out in this way, to take time to surface, especially for people who already have trauma histories (Maddie, Athena, Eddie, all of them) who did not get the support and care they needed when their earlier traumas happened.
So, Eddie. It would be in keeping with the pattern you noted for Eddie not to reckon with the trauma from the shooting until the end of the season. I am 100% confident it's going to happen eventually, even if it takes a while. And that very well may be how it plays out.
However, this time feels different. One difference is Buck. Eddie shared his trauma with Buck in a direct, explicit way. Yes, there are parallels to Bobby and Athena's attack, but Buck was literally sprayed with Eddie's blood and saved Eddie's life with his bare hands. So we have two characters with the same trauma that is unresolved.
The other is that the tension is palpable and building — between them, but also in Eddie. He's visibly showing strain, plus the string of calls that are directly related to Eddie's traumas — the fake "mudslide," multiple shootings, a helicopter crash, and next week a guy is shot and buried alive. On a meta level, the show is putting the pressure on Buck and Eddie to reckon with this.
Then, of course there's the added romantic dimension. Eddie's queer awakening, Ana, and some kind of revelation happening about his feelings for Buck when he was shot. All that is tangled up together and the show is not letting any of the pieces lie there or fade to the background. It is ratcheting up everything bit by bit, week by week.
Then, of course, Eddie is going to have a gun at his head in a few weeks. In front of Buck. Ratcheting everything up, again.
From a narrative perspective, I genuinely don't know how they could sustain this level of tension through the entire season. Something has to give.
But that doesn't mean that everything has to give. Healing takes a lot of time, so regardless, Eddie and Buck are going to be working through all of this for a while.
So, I'm willing to bet that something is going to break through by the end of the mid-season, but I don't know what. I don't pretend to be great at predicting the details, but I think as a whole, we are good at seeing the emotional arcs that the show telegraphs for the characters. Eddie reckoning with his trauma is one of them.
However, the show keeps surprising me with Buck and Eddie's story, in the best ways, and I'm willing to trust their vision and however it eventually plays out.
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(Cred from @/911onbrazil via IG)
Aghhh this hostage episode is going to be chaos but so good!
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These were posted from filming earlier today.
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4x12 | 5x06
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chim's voice breaking when he says it takes an ambulance 13 minutes to get to their apartment and chim's voice breaking when he begs the doctor to tell him why jee was in the ER
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dancing with our hands tied - taylor swift
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IF eddie rlly isn’t in 5x06 and we’re not just being bamboozled by 911 not sharing pics of him and IF they make buck be the one to face his trauma abt always being the one to almost lose eddie to these situations he has no control over and then 5x07 is the hostage situation and eddie’s life is in danger AGAIN with buck on the outside AGAIN helpless to protect him? i’m storming into the 911 writers room and demanding financial compensation (and an episode where eddie is forced to face HIS trauma)
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So you know that BTS pic of Buck with some sort of injury to his head? Here's some fun 5x07 thoughts - WHAT IF they're in the prison and Buck’s grazed by a shot, knocking him out, and the last thing Eddie sees before being taken hostage is Buck falling to the floor, unconscious, bleeding from the head after a shot was fired, and he assumes the worst.
(Cont): Eddie’s separated from everyone while he's held hostage, under the impression he just watched Buck die. That's why when, hours later, he finally gets outside and hears Buck’s voice yell “Eddie!” he can’t help the surprised/relieved, “Buck!” he yells in return. Just- what if they decided to go that hard??
Anon, I actually brought up a very similar scenario a couple of weeks back and I’ve been slowly losing my mind over it ever since.
if this whole damn thing comes full circle - Buck, watching Eddie get shot, being hit full force with the impossible idea of losing him - to Eddie, having the exact same meltdown about Buck several months later ?
I mean, just start digging my grave now.
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How have I only just realised in footage of them filming 5.07 where buck shouting eddie, we can also see him running to eddie
Yes we can!!! That’s why it makes it more dramatic imo that not only are they yelling for each other, but Buck is actually running towards Eddie. I feel like truly this has the potential to be something we haven’t seen before in the show. Every time we’ve seen Buck losing it when Eddie’s been injured, we always get Buck’s reaction but never Eddie’s. Eddie doesn’t really see the aftermath or how passionate Buck is with his concern. He doesn’t see the sheer panic and fear in Buck’s eyes at the thought of losing him. And he never sees Buck running after him. When Buck lost it and tried to dig for Eddie with his bare hands, Eddie didn’t see that. When Eddie got shot and Buck crawled under a fire truck to get him to safety, he was in and out of consciousness. He’s never seen Buck react to the idea of him being in danger. So the fact that Eddie is well and conscious enough to see Buck’s reaction tells me it’s going to be important. He’s not only going to hear the pain in Buck’s voice when he yells for him, but see the utter concern and love in Buck’s facial expressions. Buck’s always shown his true feelings on his face and this is something that is going to be very obvious to Eddie since he’s conscious enough to see it this time around. Add in the fact that Buck is literally running to Eddie, I’m sure these things together are going to cause Eddie to think about the entire significance behind all of Buck’s actions. So this is why I keep saying that I feel like the hostage situation had huge potential to shift their relationship into a specific direction, one in which feelings are realized and conversations must be had! I cannot wait for this episode nonnie!!!
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With Eddie not being in the stills I’m just hoping he’s off that day and spending it with Christopher and that we get to see them trick or treating
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i miss chimney so MUCH this is so sick i just want him back :(
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If you wouldn't mind sharing a thought or twelve, what do you think we might see unfold (unravel?) in episodes 5x08-5x10? After the hostage situation, there will be some time before the mid-season hiatus, so how high are your hopes for what we might get? Theories, dreams, etc. all welcome here.
This is such a tough one. Because at this point? After everything that has played out? Anything is possible. Anything.
And honestly? My one big dream — once it became clear to me that they were all in with the love story — has always been a queer awakening arc for Eddie. Not a coming out story, but a full exploration of Eddie's healing, through self-acceptance, self-love and allowing himself to love Buck. My dream is already coming true, and I am just sitting back, thrilled to watch the story unfold in whatever way they decide to tell it.
I've been sitting with your ask and ultimately realized the thing I am stuck on is what will be the culmination, the moment, the thing that will wrap up Buck and Eddie's 5A story and leave us likely reeling for several months until 5B?
I'm not great at — and generally don't try — predicting the details. I'm much more into emotional arcs, character beats, relationship developments. And generally speaking, the show is intentional (and getting less and less subtle) about telegraphing those things.
So, that said, it feels huge that the hostage situation happens in 5x07. (And I wonder if we'll be getting a cliffhanger into 5x08 ala 4x13/4×14.) Huge because that leaves so much room, unlike 4x14, for dealing with the emotional fallout.
The things that have to happen — that the show has intentionally laid the groundwork to happen — are:
Buck and Eddie individually being honest with themselves about their trauma, that they are very much not ok and need help.
Buck and Eddie talking to each other about their shared trauma.
Buck and Eddie grappling with the real-life implications of Eddie's decision about his will. That before, Buck would have willingly, easily risked his life for even the smallest chance to save Eddie's. Without even a first thought, Buck would thrust himself into danger. But Eddie ensured Buck cannot do that any more. What on earth is going to happen when Eddie's life is in danger again?
Eddie, at long last, relents and reckons with his feelings for Buck. (I am steadfast in my belief that Eddie reaching across the pavement to Buck, while he was dying, was Eddie's oh moment. He's just been fighting like hell to repress it.)
Buck wakes up to the true nature of his feelings for Eddie.
One of them reveals something to the other.
And then we're off to the next phase of the love story.
As for the Taylor of it all and the break up that is obviously coming, I honestly don't care that much. That relationship was dust before it even started and is utterly meaningless in the face of Buck and Eddie's epic love story. I hope it ends soon, but it's definitely ending.
I feel like we MIGHT get up to #4 by 5x10. It's reasonable to expect it will be a Christmas ep, so I'm hoping for warm fuzzies (especially after the rough emotional ride of this season) and quality Buckley Diaz Family content. It's important to spend time on just Buck and Eddie for a while — the romantic horizon that is theirs and theirs alone. But I would be surprised if we don't wrap up 5x10 with Buck, Eddie and Christopher together, at Christmas. It's tradition, after all.
So, very long story short, I have no idea! But I am ready for a WILD ride.
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I genuinely don’t think I’m like emotionally in the right headspace to deal with an episode with no eddie, no chimney, AND no Maddie like wtf is this season 1
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