#95 theses

[facts-i-just-made-up]

am doing a history project. can u tell me about the 95 theses?

Because Germany used a logarithmic decimal system at the time, many people are unaware that Luther in fact posted only 9.5 theses on his local church door. Because the final thesis is cut off, it is considered the 0.5 beyond the other 9 theses. These theses are as follows:

Confession is good.

God accepts confessions, not the Pope.

Purgatory is a big load of Papal bull.

Paying for salvation is absurd, as God is already way rich.

God can buy anything he wants, he has so much money.

God could even buy the twittering of birds.

If God bought the twitter, then God should get to say anything God wants in those tweets, even reinstating banned bird species.

God can run twitter any way he wants, even if he wants to run it into the ground, because that's how free-market capitalism should work and everyone knows capitalism is the Christian way no matter what Jesus said about greed and the rich and the poor because America.

Comedy is now legal on twit-

Why Luther mentioned America is the source of much scholarly debate, as it had only just been discovered by Europe and was believed by most to be a small island notable only for having a new food called "potatoes."

Luther was thankfully largely ignored owing to his own heavily antisemitic statements, which he felt would be welcomed by the aforementioned twitter. He was soon forgotten, and Germany's Jewish population was not known to have any further problems.*

*According to many on twitter.

#martin luther #protestantism #history #twitter #95 theses #unreality

[nailsofvecna]

Early prototypes of this scroll lacked a limit on their duration. Mistakes were made, and lessons were learned.

#magic item monday #d&d 5e #homebrew #magic item #martin luther #95 theses

[boldlygoingtohell]

Just as Martin Luther posted his famous 95 Thesis to the doors of the Wittenberg Church in a public proclamation of purposeful disruption of the ruling party, so too did Regina George post and disperse the pages of the Burn Book in an attempt to publicly and purposefully disrupt the ruling class and status quo. In this essay I will

#mean girls #Martin Luther #95 theses #regina george

[bookishbrigitta]

I'm sorry, but we just don't get enough blatant, capital-R Reformation for the Jedi. The premise of "being weirdly strict and hypocritical is really the bigger sin" and "actually, priests should be allowed to marry" is already right there.

Like, give me some Martin Luke-r. You're already rebuilding the order. I'm sure the schools on Tatooine sucked, but Leia and Han would absolutely help you write 95 reasons the Jedi messed up.

#star wars #luke skywalker #protestant reformation #jedi order #martin luther #the jedi council #95 theses #star wars: reform of the jedi

[jtarmstrong]

Happy Halloween to all my fellow Christians out there!

On this day 506 years ago, a university professor named Martin Luther dropped a letter in the mail - a letter we know as the 95 Theses - and unintentionally started the Protestant Reformation. 

A holiday we know for its costumes and candy became the day that gave birth to the churches we attend each Sunday - Lutheran, Anglican, Episcopal, Presbyterian, Reformed, Methodist, Baptist, and Pentecostal. 

In October of 2020, while many cities, towns, and neighborhoods were debating whether or not to even have trick-or-treating, it was our churches that saved Halloween - by having drive through trick-or-treating and trunk-or-treats. 

While it is tempting to write off Halloween as a day that belongs to witches, ghosts, darkness, and Satan, nothing could be further from the truth - Psalms 118:24 still stands true - even on Halloween. 

“This is the day which the Lord hath made; we will rejoice and be glad in it.” 

Don’t join the witches in their dancing and incantations - Don’t join the demons in their prideful revelry and drunkenness. 

You and I have more important things to do - Let’s get busy rejoicing. 

The only ghost that Halloween belongs to is the Holy Ghost. 

#halloween #christian #church #spiritual #religion #Martin Luther #95 theses #protestant reformation #holiday #costume #candy #trick or treat #trunk or treat #witches #ghosts #demons #satan #devil #lucifer #rejoice #psalm #psalms #song #lutheran #anglican #episcopal #presbyterian #reformed #methodist #baptist

[twilight-zoned-out]

Halloween? More like Hallo Reformation

-Martin Luther

#history #martin luther #halloween #reformation day #protestant reformation #whoop #95 theses #Germany #twilight-zoned-out #it's a language pun #but doubled #hallo means hello in German #happy reformation day

[quixoticclown]

The 95 Theses were the original cringe compilation

#martin Luther #cringe #protestant #irish comedy #95 theses #catholicism

[be-ca-lm]

Halloween is always weird for me. I still am not comfortable with the holiday at all still. But hey, here's your reminder that Luther was a misogynistic, anti Semitic, evil bellend.

#halloween #ex christian #exvangelical #ex cult #ex religious #deconstruction #deconversion #apostate #apostasy #cult #cult survivor #cult shit #spooky #luther #martin luther #95 theses #protestant #catholic #christian

[relationaltherapist]

Martin Luther is credited as the spark that ignited the great Reformation of the church that history had been moving toward for the previous two centuries. Luther was appalled by rank abuses in the Catholic church such as selling indulgences to forgive sin, and awakened by his reading of the Bible, especially Christ’s words in Romans 1:17, “the just shall live by faith.” In 1517 Luther nailed his 95 Theses to the door at the castle church in Wittenberg, Germany.

Essentially Luther challenged the Catholic Church that 1) salvation was by faith alone, 2) Scriptures are the standard for Christian faith, and 3) the church is a community of believers in which all are priests called to offer spiritual sacrifices to God. For the world of Catholic Christendom, these truths would shake the foundations.

However, the protection provided by the princes of the time proved to be similarly as legalistic as the Catholic Church’s involvement with political rulers. Only one faith could legitimately exist in a given state, and that faith had to be the ruler's and could be only Catholicism or Lutheranism.

If the Lutheran reformation began in a monastic cell, the Anabaptist reformation in a prayer meeting, the Calvinistic reformation at a scholar’s desk, then the English reformation began in the affairs of state.

William Tyndale had already been translating, copying, and smuggling English Bibles into England. For this he was ultimately burned at the stake in 1536 before the new church was well started. His dying prayer was, “Lord open the eyes of the king.” Miles Coverdale and John Rogers continued this Bible work, until King Henry himself was convinced by Thomas Cranmer, Archbishop of Canterbury and highest church official of England, to allow and promote the “Great Bible” to be read throughout the nation. God had answered Tyndale’s prayer and reformation fires would continue to grow.

In this tide of science and intellect, faith espoused in three of the four Reformation groups receded from the robust doctrine of justifying faith to what is called Protestant Scholasticism, turning faith into a mental exercise. No longer an act of surrender to the mercy of God revealed in Christ, faith was now a formal ascent to doctrinal truths set forth by scholars, moving the center of faith from the heart ❤️ to the head 🫡.

#Luther #Reformation #faith #95 theses #catholic #scripture #william tyndale

[dejahisashmom]

Apocalyptic Apocrypha: What was Removed from the Bible - and Why? | Ancient Origins

https://www.ancient-origins.net/artifacts-ancient-writings/apocalyptic-apocrypha-0017214

View On WordPress

#1455 #1517 #1534 #1592 #1600s #1611 #1826 #1964 #1966 #95 Theses #Apocalypse #Apocalypse of Abraham #Apocalypse of Moses #Apocalypse of Paul #Apocalypse of Peter #Apocrypha #Apocryphal #Banned From the Bible #bible #Canon #Catholicism #Christian #Christianity #Church of England #Clementine Vulgate #Constantine I of Rome #Deuterocanonical #Eastern Orthodox Church #Gutenberg Bible #Infancy Gospel of Thomas

[dyslexic-asexual]

Windows 95 Theses

#windows 95 #95 theses #martin luther 95 theses #christianity #is this anything

[dontcallittimetravel]

Happy birthday to Martin Luther, not only the world's first shitposter, but also the first to go viral

#happybirthday #martin luther #95 theses #shitpost #protestant reformation

[trutown-the-bard]

And who said the 95 Theses aren’t relevant today?

#95 thesis #95 theses #martin luther #the pope

[depressed-bubbles]

Martin Luther had his 95 Theses/Grievances against the Roman Catholic Church, but today I come to you with my Top 3 Grievances against Sherlock bbc.

1. what the hell is this time line? i’m not even sure then is any canon time line for the entire series, let alone each episode. the only exact time we are given is of Sherlock’s “death” being two years long. and some people will say that the measurement of time doesn’t *really* matter, soooo who cares! I DO!!!! it matters so much, i can’t even iterate my reasonings except scream in a bucket. there’s so many concepts including Mary life before and after John, just Johns entire life before meeting Sherlock (by basic calculations he should be sooooo gosh damn old to work as a doctor as he does), Moriarty and everything he does outside of and pertaining to Sherlock, Eurus (her crimes, her time in Sherrinford, her time with Moriarty), just—- so many plots and aspects of this show make little to no logical sense because of how off and awkward the series chronically works, or doesn’t work.

2. John. his life. and by life i mean love life. i will admit i’ve never understood the concept of just meeting someone and suddenly dating them, maybe it’s the greyromantic thing, but hey…. this isn’t about me. but what the fuck? when does this guy have the time? he basically had three jobs: mystery man, doctor man, and sherlock babysitter man. when is this guy going out and meeting these girls? and why is he doing this? he knows he’s in no place to be #dating anyone, mentally or physically. the only person he hangs out with is the *cough* love of his life *cough* i mean unsocial flatmate, whom i heavily doubt would allow his John to get taken with anyone else. but overall, in the entirety of this show, John and dating don’t have a purpose except to show that John cares about Sherlock more than anyone he claims to care about more. to show his true hufflepuff— wrong fandom —his true loyalty and undying yearning to follow Sherlock into the deepest darks. except Mary, that has a plot, a good one? ehhhhhhhhhh but there’s q reason for the relationship, not just “here we go, another reason Johns not a H O M O S E X U A L

3. the ‘end’ of the season. personally i liked that episode. is it really weird and create a few plot problems and unrealistic scenarios based on what we know of our characters? yes, yes it does. but at the same time i don’t care and the only thing i truly hate is how annoying the Moriarty recordings were. they broke my ears. but this being the end of a series that i love so much and truly cherish, just breaks my heart because it’s so SHITTY! not a shitty episode, but a shitty one to end a series on. but yeah sure, they say they’ll do another season…………. i can’t believe that. at all. so, until i open Netflix and see a new season of Sherlock there I will be calling “The Final Problem” the series finale of Sherlock.

even though it sucks as one.

#sherlock fandom #bbc sherlock #95 theses #jim moriarty #complaining #lgbtq #why am i like this #i am sherlocked #john watson #eurus holmes #mary morstan #god why

[karryalane]

#God #Christ #Jesus #Bible #religion #Christianity #Martin Luther #95 Theses #Church at Wittenburg #Protestant Reformation

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

Mother's Day can be a painful reminder, so here's a salute to all the kids and adult children who grew up with absent mothers, angry mothers, negligent mothers, abusive mothers, overly-critical mothers, codependent mothers, overwhelmed and struggling mothers, mothers who ignored your cries for help, mothers who sacrificed your happiness to placate others, mothers who tried to do better but failed, and mothers who didn't try quite hard enough.

And to every child and adult who has a complicated relationship with their mother or caretaker--it's okay to feel conflicted. It's okay to feel hurt and love and resentment and pain and sympathy and longing and guilt bundled up into one big tangled ball. It's okay to struggle to reconcile the bad memories with the good ones that simultaneously exist. It's okay to be angry about the ways your parent failed you, and also aware of their personal struggles, and the way their parents in turn failed them. It's okay to recognize that you were loved but also that you were treated unfairly, unkindly. Contradictions are the natural state of the world. Multiple truths coexist. It's okay to be conflicted.

Parents are humans. Human relationships are complicated, and cannot be summarized by a greeting card. Wherever you are coming from, I hope your future holds healing and love, love, love.

#not a shitpost #serious post #abuse mention #neglect mention #mother's day #If you think im singling out moms just wait until father's day #you think martin luther had shit to say when he nailed 95 theses to a church door? bitch I'll double that