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#:((( I was so so sad to see ya gone bb
skellymom · 5 months
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Posted 10/31/2023
Chapter 3
The BAD BATCH Mini Series HALLOWEEN Fan Fic
"The Tale of the Dathomir Witch"
To read Chapter 2:
https://www.tumblr.com/skellymom/731405312676003840/the-bad-batch-mini-series-halloween-fan-fic?source=share
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(Credit for awesome Halloween BB dividers goes to: stars-n-spice!)
The Batch and Old Daka leave Ord Mantell to KICK SOME BUTT!
All Ages: Sadness, mentions of canon Star Wars Empire badness, crying, and some sweet revenge at the end of this tale (It's coming in Chapter 4)!
Word count: 2.5K
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“Take Cover” by Unsecret: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dB7LWLDa0qs 
The morning sun rose upon Ord Mantell.  The Batch awoke from their slumber surprisingly refreshed.  Unbeknownst to them, Old Daka had swept away the nightmares like old cobwebs.  Unfortunately, she couldn’t take away the hole in their hearts. The one approximately the size of their sister. 
Hunter was still unaccounted for.  The last anyone had seen him; he had run away after Omega and Riffraff's departure.  Gone all night.  Tech inquired out loud about his absence. 
Old Daka, who had been meditating and humming opened her eyes, “He’s on his way back.”  Then she closed her eyes and resumed humming.  Ten minutes later Hunter stumbled aboard the Marauder, dirty, sweaty, exhausted. 
“Hunter!”  Echo exclaimed. 
“Caf, shower...” he rasped.  Hunter, trying to be a leader after his absence and thinking those two things would give him the energy to continue forging ahead on the journey. 
“Shower THEN sleep!” Daka commanded, eyes still closed.  “You may have started to process your grief, but rest is required...then caf.” 
Hunter, too tired and beat down to argue headed to the refresher. 
“Clever Boy and The Unbroken, I will give you the coordinates to our destination.” 
“What is the plan of action to secure us proximity to Darth Sidious undetected?”  Without Hunter present, Tech needed details. 
“You all are on a need-to-know basis for now.  For safety reasons.” 
Echo leaned over and whispered to Tech, “Pretty glib, eh?  Hope she knows what she’s doing.” 
“I heard that.  And, yes, I do!”  Old Daka sassed, eyes still closed. She resumed humming. 
Tech and Echo exchanged glances. 
Tech fired up the Marauder and took off from Ord Mantell.  It left the upper atmosphere of the planet and eventually settled into hyperspace. 
“Granny Daka?” 
Old Daka stopped humming and opened her eyes.  Wrecker was standing before her holding out a ration bar and cup of caf.  “Thought ya might be hungry.” 
The old woman smiled warmly at Wrecker.  “You’re a sweet boy.  Thank you.”  She patted his hand and took the items.  “You’ll be a wonderful partner to Hazard.” 
“Who’s Hazard?” 
“Oh...you’ll see.” Old Daka smiled and winked as she bit into the ration bar. 
************************************************************************
Many hours later Hunter emerged from his bunk.  He looked much better than he did earlier in the rotation.  Daka had helped him sleep while she meditated.  Echo handed him a cup of caf. 
“So... what’s the plan?”  Hunter inquired. 
“According to Old Daka, we are on a need-to-know basis for safety reasons.”  Tech quipped. 
“I know we usually go by the seat of our pants, but this seems like a mission we shouldn’t be improvising.”  Hunter sipped his caf. 
“My thought’s exactly.” Echo added. 
Wrecker sat and watched the conversation unfold. 
Old Daka was quiet for a moment.  Then she spoke, “We are to be captured.  That is the easiest way to gain access to Sidious.  I will give you more information as we progress.  If I were to give you too much, he would be able to read your minds with the Force.  That would put a damper on our mission.” 
“Wouldn’t he be able to anyways.”  Tech playing devil’s advocate. 
“He’d see us coming before we even got to his location.” Echo stated. 
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“No. Because I will be dampening his ability to see us clearly.  And the less you know, the less he will.  The rest you must trust me on.”  Old Daka closed her eyes and started humming again. 
“What makes you so sure you can block out a powerful Sith Lord like Sidious?”  Hunter asked. 
Old Daka kept humming with her eyes closed. 
“Uh, Granny...hello?” 
Still humming.  Eyes closed. 
“Good talk.”  Hunter frowned sarcastically. 
*********************************************************************** 
“Hide and Seek” by Kergy: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c03J4wXMuGM&list=RDEpak9TqrKLs&index=13 
Several hours later Tech perked up and addressed Old Daka.  “We are nearing our destination in a few moments.  What is our next plan of action?” 
Old Daka opened her eyes.  “The large Imperial ship we will be infiltrating will enquire about who we are as standard protocol.  Answer them as you would if you were bringing me in as a prisoner.” 
“They’ll recognize us right away.  We’ll be blasted right out of existence.”  Echo piped up. 
“Sidious has had a large bounty on my head for some time now.  Delivering me was eventually expected.  Plus, I can handle the crew on the Imperial bridge right from here.  For all they know you are Trandoshan Bounty Hunters who finally managed to bring me in. Speak as you normally would.  They won’t suspect a thing.” 
The Batchers, all shot each other uneasy glances. 
“Hope you're right Granny, or this is going to be a VERY short mission.”  Hunter frowned. 
The Marauder left hyperspace and a large Imperial vessel came into view.  A minute later, the Marauder was being hailed.  Tech opened communications then glanced at Old Daka.  She closed her eyes and took a deep breath.  The Imperial ships bridge inquired about their presence.  As Tech began to speak, Daka waved her hand and muttered something under her breath. 
“This is Cradossk aboard the Trandoshan Bounty vessel.  We have captured Night Sister Old Daka and are here to claim our bounty.  We request access to board.”  Tech’s leg bounced continuously as he spoke to help keep his voice even. 
The comm was quiet.  Everyone held their breath. 
“Do ya think they bought it?”  Wrecker finally spoke up. 
Still no answer. 
Echo ran a hand down his face, “We’re kriffed.  Lads, it’s been a pleasure working with you.”  He looked at Old Daka, “Well, at least we tried.” 
Still no answer. 
Then... 
“Permission granted.  Proceed to Docking Bay 3.” 
Everyone exhaled audibly.  Tech maneuvered to land inside the ship.
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“Before we land, I should inform you all that Sidious isn’t alone on that vessel.  I sense another strong presence on board.”   
“Oh?  And who would that be???  Hunter had a bad feeling. 
“Darth Vader is with him.” 
Everyone on the Marauder threw up their hands and groaned. 
************************************************************************
The Marauder touched down at Docking Bay 3.  The Batch stood and awaited their next piece of the plan. 
“Clever and Strong Boys, you will stay with the ship and leave when I give the signal.  From there you will proceed to the blue green planet I gave you coordinates to.”  Old Daka nodded to Tech.  “Keen Man and The Unbroken will chaperone me as prisoner.” 
“How will I know ‘The Signal’” Tech seemed confused. 
“You will ‘know’ through the Force.”   
“That will be difficult as I lack Force sensitivity.”  Tech was concerned 
“No matter.  I will use the Force to alert you.  Trust me.”  Old Daka’s reply had him scratching his head. 
Hunter interjected, “Wait...once we step off the Marauder Echo and I won’t see Tech and Wrecker ever again?” 
“Yes.” 
“Lady, you sure don’t leave people time to say goodbye!”  Hunter was trying to hold his composure.  After having to quickly leave Omega, losing two more brothers was more than he could deal with. 
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Echo stood by terribly crestfallen.  His face didn’t hide it.  But then he had lost so many brothers before joining The Batch.  At least with this mission there would be a reason...and possibly a future. 
Tech knew logically this was the best scenario for the most favorable outcome.  His head accepted this.  However, he had a horrible feeling in his chest...just about heart level. 
Wrecker knew he had no control over the situation and did what a good soldier and brother should: follow orders and complete the mission.  It took everything he could to not break out in tears again. 
Hunter grabbed Tech by the front of his shirt and pulled him into a hug.  His other hand reached up and pulled Wreckers forehead to his.  Wrecker gave up and started bawling, squeezing them both in a huge bear hug.  Tech was trapped in the middle, silent tears escaping his goggles.  Wrecker reached out and grabbed Echo, squeezing him into the group hug. 
Old Daka watched the clones say goodbye for the last time. “We must hurry.  An Imperial officer, Vader, and two stormtroopers are approaching.  I will use the Force to disguise you as Trandoshans.” 
The Batch parted.  Wrecker wiped his face.  Tech dabbed at his goggles.  Hunter grabbed handcuffs and snapped them on Old Daka’s wrists.  Echo disengaged his scomp, holstered it, and replaced it with his mechanical hand.  Then he along with Hunter took out their blasters and escorted the old woman to the Marauder’s gangplank to leave the ship.  Everyone had a lump in their throat. 
Old Daka took a deep breath and exhaled.  Nobody but Hunter could feel something in the air change.  Everyone and everything looked the same, but he suspected Daka’s glamour spell was radiating around them. 
Hunter and Echo escorted Old Daka off the Marauder.  They walked down the gangplank and a few feet into the landing bay to meet Vader and the Imperial Officer. 
Daka had cloaked Hunter and Echo with her glamour spell.  Everyone laying eyes on them wouldn’t know the difference...except...she sensed a presence... 
…up above and ahead several floors up a tall, thin man with silver hair stared down at them.  He seemed very interested in the interaction that was to take place.  Strangely enough, he was hard to read using the Force.  Not that he fought her trying to read him...there was just...nothing.  An impenetrable wall to the inside of his head, his thoughts.  This man was trying very hard to hide his true feelings.  She didn’t sense Jedi, but more like Hunter, someone actively designed with a special ability.  He also had a long-range rifle trained on them.  
  “Start a Riot” by Beginners: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WRa9XSVrblI 
Tech, ever-vigilant noticed their brother on the upper platform. 
“Wrecker, look!” He whispered and pointed out Crosshair’s position. 
Too late, Vader sensed some small change in the Force, cocked his head.  Old Daka, catching this employed an underhanded tactic to distract Vader. 
“Ani?”  Vader started at a familiar voice.  His gaze shot back at Old Daka...but she wasn’t there.  Instead stood Anakin Skywalker’s mother.  “Ani!  Don’t let them kill me!!!”  She had tears in her eyes, her face pleading.  His sweet long-lost mother.  
Vader was prepared for some type of scheming and magic by Old Daka...but NOT this.  Old vivid memories ripped through his head and heart.  He Force snatched the old woman up by her neck.  She expertly kept her glamor spell up, still pleading and crying as Schmi Skywalker, but could only barely maintain this deception.  Her glamour spell on Hunter, Echo, and the Marauder melted away and they were revealed. 
The Imperial officer yelled an order to open fire on them while attempting to comm for backup.  A blaster shot caught the back of his head and he went down.  The two stormtroopers next to him barely had enough time to squeeze off a shot before they too were taken out.  Hunter looked up to catch a glimpse of Crosshair and they locked eyes for a moment before all hell broke loose.  Imps spilled out into the bay, shooting. 
Aboard the Marauder Tech opened fire from the pilot's seat and Wrecker from the tail gunner's roost.  They had kept their shield up ever since landing and the stormtrooper blaster shots harmlessly pinged off it. Tech engaged the Marauder’s propulsion system to turn the ship 360 degrees so they could continuously fire at everything in the landing bay.  Explosions and smoke filled the space.   
Hunter and Echo ducked double wielding their blasters while furiously looking for Vader and Old Daka.  They had disappeared entirely from view.  Fortunately, Hunter could still sense the old woman’s glamour spell.  It tickled his senses but was quickly getting away from them. 
“Echo!”  He yelled.  “Vader took Old Daka into the ship.  Cover me while we follow and track her.” 
“Got it, Vod” Echo yelled back. 
The Marauder came full circle firing away.  Tech spotted Hunter and Echo through the windscreen attempting to get access to the Imperial ship. 
“Wrecker, I’m opening the gangplank.  You must cover Echo and Hunter!” 
“I’m ON IT!!!”  Wrecker jumped down from the gunner's seat, grabbed the rapid rotating blaster from the Marauder’s gun rack.  He took his position at the open gangplank and fired away hollering like mad. “AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!” 
Tech aimed for the door between the landing bay and inner ship entrance.  He fired the Marauder’s cannon and blew a hole through it.  Hunter and Echo hopped over the smoldering wreckage of the door, quickly turned and saluted their brothers.  Then they both disappeared into the ship.   
Wrecker stepped back onto the ship and ran back to the aft gunner's roost. Tech closed the gangplank. With the Marauder’s shield still strongly intact, they continued to use the ships’ cannons to shoot and destroy everything they could until they were signaled to leave the Imperial vessel.  
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Hunter’s senses tingled stronger.  He was on Vader and Old Daka’s trail.  He holstered his second weapon and pulled his vibroknife, slashing and shooting as he progressed forward.  Echo, holding the rear shot furiously at anything that moved. Troopers fell by the dozens as both clones progressed quickly down several hallways and corridors. 
************************************************************************
Meanwhile, Old Daka kept up her ruse as Schmi Skywalker, crying, pleading. Vader still had her by the neck as he Force dragged her above the floor and down the corridor towards Darth Sidious’ room aboard the vessel. He was angry about her choice of deception. It hurt him deeply, but he couldn’t kill her. Sidious needed her power...and... even if he didn’t...Vader seriously started to doubt he could kill her. Not due to a lack of power...but a lack of will.  
Backup stormtroopers advanced past them to stop the oncoming clones. They stole glances at Vader yanking a crying, levitating woman past their formation. A few stopped cold, tripping up troopers behind them. Shaking their heads and unsure what was going on aboard the ship. This was indeed unprecedented and shocking. 
Vader arrived at Sidious’ door. Blaster shots rang out from Hunter as he and Echo rounded the corner and advanced. Vader turned to see Hunter fully feral shooting a blaster in one hand and mowing down Imperial troopers with a vibroknife in the other. He ducked, parried, jumped, flipped, and dispatched them easily. Darth Vader briefly admired this clone. He would have made an ideal Sith. Pity he would be killed. Vader then turned, dragging along Old Daka, and slamming the doors shut behind them. 
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To read Chapter 4! And juicy revenge!!!
https://www.tumblr.com/skellymom/732696079947251712/posted-103123?source=share
PLEASE like, comment, and/or REBLOG!
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hotwaterandmilk · 4 months
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Paripi Koumei/Ya Boy Kongming! drama finale extremely brief almost-4am thoughts.
I'M NOT EVEN MAD ABOUT THEM DOING THIS TO ME. IT HURT SO GOOD. I LOVED IT OH MY GODDDDDD.
It's the middle of the night and I should be sleeping, but I have no self control so when I saw this was available I needed to watch it immediately. Summer Sonia plan has its bumps but everything works out. Eiko and Maria sing together, everything is AWESOME for everyone who isn't Keiji and the show has 10 mins to go and yayyyy!
But then Kongming is drawn back to that meeting with Liu Bei they've been blue balling us with all series and he realises:
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Cue Kongming and Owner having a heartfelt conversation in a way only two middle-aged men who converse exclusively through Three Kingdoms lore can.
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Obviously the exact details are kind of skewed, but Kobayashi has previously suggested Kongming's dreams are calling to him so he can accept that Kongming has to go and lets him. Eiko is performing and doesn't realise any of this is going on. Later that night at the BB Lounge she thanks Kongming and he gives her his final pep talk.
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But can't bring himself to say he thinks he's going back to being dead or whatever, so he holds back tears and Eiko just goes about like :D before singing upon Kongming's request without realising he sees this as the final performance of hers he'll ever witness. FLASHBACK TO ALL THE GOOD TIMES. SHOW WHY YOU DO THIS. HE BEGINS WALKING TOWARDS LIU BEI...
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Cut to everyone else coming in for the evening's celebrations as Eiko is performing, Kongming lets everyone step in front of him until he disappears behind the crowd...
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Outside the club Kobayashi (who has been escorting KABEtaijin) suddenly looks up at a shooting star in the sky and silently mouths "Kongming."
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KABE and Kobayashi head inside, everyone is celebrating and it's super cute.
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Kobayashi looks around for Kongming but can't see him so heads behind the bar. Then Eiko, oblivious Eiko WHO HAS HAD NO IDEA WHATSOEVER THAT ANY OF THIS WAS HAPPENING, can't see Kongming anywhere either! She calls out for him, asks Owner but he says he hasn't seen him... Kongming is just... gone...
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She looks everywhere for Kongming, calling his name....
😭😭😭
... and then she finds him in front of the mirror in the back room crying but IT'S OK BECAUSE HE'S.STILL.HERE.
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He didn't die on the way back to his home planet like Poochie! He's stuck in Shibuya using Paypay like everyone else! MASSIVE MASSIVE FAKE OUT JUST TO TOY WITH EVERYONE'S FEELINGS IN THE FINAL 10 MINUTES OF THE SHOW OH MY GOD.
But I'm not mad because it got me good. I was like 😭 at every turn, then he just doesn't go and it's like y'know what? That's cool. I'M JUST GLAD HE'S HERE OK.
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The problem with the idea of sending Kongming "back" is that, well, he died in the past. The first thing he does in the present is check his pulse and he's alive now, so given he's not a ghostly presence or anything there isn't any real "going back" to be had for Kongming imho. He's just some ojii-san in the city now and I couldn't ask for more. He did finally make peace with the presence of Liu Bei and his failures in the past, now he's purely living that Shibuya life and the drama is entirely open to a movie or sequel.
The ratings weren't great so I'm not sure that will happen, but I am just truly happy that we got these 10 episodes of television. The production values were high, the cast were excellent and the writing fleshed out the manga story beautifully. The whole concept is absolutely absurd and these last couple of episodes felt somwhat rushed, but the drama approaches everything so earnestly that it's hard not to get swept up in it all.
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So now I have to go try and sleep without dwelling on all the sad Kongming faces I just had to endure.
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😭😭😭
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nerdyerror · 2 years
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fo4 Characters who should’ve been companions but weren’t dialogue swap pt 1: Sturges
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Note I headcanon that Sturges’ synth designation is M1-69, cause he and Danse look so similar, and I feel like Sturges would be able to get farther into the security of the institute so he knows he’s a synth, and he knows a lot more details about a lot more synths. I’m just saying that I’m going to incorporate some of that in the companion swaps.
Dogmeat: *sad whimper*
Sturges: Aw, don’t worry bud, I’ll bring you back something special.
Dogmeat: *curious whine*
Preston: Stay safe out there.
Sturges: Always do Pres.
Deacon: Wow if it isn’t the minutemen’s miracle man, able to build anything out of nothing!
Sturges: Uh… Thank you?
Curie: Oh Monsieur Sturges, a fellow man of science, When you return I would love to pick your brain on somethings.
Sturges: Oh sure Curie, sounds like we’ll both be able to glean something from that!
Piper: Any word on you latest invention.
Sturges: Not for you.
Danse, pre bb: You are clearly a great asset to the people of the commonwealth.
Sturges: Thanks, you could be too.
Danse, post bb: What sort of magical contraption do you have planned this week?
Sturges: You’ll just have to wait and see, brother.
Nick: Stay safe out there Sturges, don’t get too caught up in some old tech you stumble across.
Sturges: Thanks but I can’t make any promises.
Codsworth: Ah Mr. Sturges, do stay safe out there.
Sturges: Sure will, ya need anything I could pick up?
Codsworth: Well I think my joints are getting rusty.
MacCready: One of your contraptions hasn’t gotten you killed yet.
Sturges: Not yet, and not for a while. S’pose you’ll be counting the days.
X6-88: You are one of the more intriguing specimens the wasteland has to offer.
Sturges: I’ll take that as a compliment.
Cait: Sturges! It’s been a while.
Sturges: Sure has Cait, you holding up?
Cait: Well as can be expected.
Hancock: I’ve heard of you, and you’re devices, you sure you’re not doing chems?
Sturges: No Sir, my Pops always said that chems were for cowards, er not that I agree with that sentiment exactly I just personally don’t believe in chem usage-
Hancock: Don’t sweat it, kid.
Strong: This human think too much!
Sturges: I think just the right amount, sir.
Longfellow: This one’s got a good head on his shoulders, knows hot to listen to his elders.
Sturges: Well generations of knowledge do better than one incomplete lifetime.
Sturges: Find me something useful while you’re out there buddy.
Dogmeat: *wags tail happily*
Sturges: Sure is lucky that I ran into the two of you.
Preston: Same to you, you’ve gotten us out of a lot of tight spots, Sturges.
Sturges: If ain’t the railroad’s star spy, out to do good for synths everywhere!
Deacon: Thanks, Sturges.
Sturges: I have complete confidence both the general and you will be safe out there.
Curie: Yes with her/his battle prowess and my medical expertise we will be quite safe indeed.
Sturges: You and I might not get along but I know you’ll keep the general safe.
MacCready: *shooketh* Uh… Thanks, Sturges
Pre BB Sturges: Stay safe out there, you two.
Danse, genuinely confused: We aren’t planning on getting into danger?
Post BB Sturges: Don’t get hurt out there Danse, see ya later.
Danse: Yeah bye, Sturges, don’t hurt yourself well I’m gone.
Sturges: A real life detective! Like the silver shroud!
Nick: Thank you Sturges, what are you gonna work on?
Sturges: I’ll have to find out! :)
Sturges: Mayor Hancock, it’s a pleasure.
Hancock: A pleasure? To meet me?
Sturges: Miss Wright.
Piper: I would respond with Mister your last name but you don’t have one.
Sturges: Codsworth, if a bolt comes lose well you’re out there I’ll fix ya up.
Codsworth: Oh thank you, Mr. Sturges. How kind!
Sturges: Your name is certainly accurate.
Strong: Strong’s name is right for strong!
Sturges: Preston stay safe out there…
Preston: Always do.
Sturges: Cait, I know you’ll keep them safe, but don’t forget about yourself.
Cait: No promises, Sturge.
Sturges: I know you don’t think is but a lot of people care about you, don’t get hurt.
Sturges: Ya sure about trusting this guy?
X6-88: Likewise.
Sturges: Well, I know the general’s in safe hands.
Longfellow: Thanks, private.
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mysterylover123 · 4 years
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BNHA Chapter 285: I’m Not Ready to Say Goodbye
mysterylover123
Yesterday: “I’ll go on Tumblr for just a minute. Surely no spoilers have leaked yet”. Instantly learns: “HEADLINE: INTERNET HAS GONE CRAZY DUE TO BAKUGOU PRETTY MUCH DYING”. 
never go on tumblr on thursdays
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Honey I was wondering about this. So unless Deku manifests a healing/regeneration quirk right the Ff now we’re gonna have to start looking into some robot arms.
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Don’t you dare get my hopes up Shiggy. I saw those leaks I know how this ends.
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sobs
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You’re making your boyfriend worry so much Deku.
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Quick, time for some TD/BK to distract me from my emminent feels!!
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YAS I KNEW YOU WOULDN’T LEAVE TDDK OUT OF THIS! THE OT3 IS COMPLETE. (and apparently about to become an OT2 sobbbbbbssssss)
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HE SAID THAT CAUSE HE WAS WORRIED ABOUT DEKU OH. MY. GOD. Litereally everything Bakugou has ever done is now legitimately interpretable through a “cares about Deku” lens.
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MORE BB BKDK SOB HORI WHAT’RE YOU DOING TO ME
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Guess who just rewatched season 1 guess who’s drowning in BKDK feels you got it me
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I’m sure this’ll work. Hey Endeav remember the last time you used this attack on a regenerating League of Villains baddie? Remember what he did to you IMMEDIATELY AFTER that looks remarkably similar to those leak images?!
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is Tomura actually getting possessed by the Ghost of AFO or something?
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Shoto’s gon lose his dad and his boyfriends in one day dammit our 1/2 and 1/2 boy doesn’t deserve this mus protecc shoto he deserves the world
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IKR? That’s what we’re all thinking!
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shit shit crap here it comes
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SAD BKDK MONTAGE TO MAKE THE MOMENT HURT AS MUCH AS FUCKING POSSIBLE BECAUSE OF COURSE KACCHAN’S LAST THOUGHTS WILL BE OF DEKU AND MY OTP NEEDS THEIR SWANSONG DAMMIT IS THIS THE LAST RIDE?!
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I think this image has burrowed its way into my psyche and will never leave until I either reach the series’ final chapter and see Katsuki getting a happy ending or know for sure if this is the last time we’ll ever see him next week. please oh please oh please oh please don’t be dead
I know a lot of people are being like “chill, he’s not dead, he’s a shonen character”. But I also know that this series is known for subverting shonen tropes. Hori doesn’t do things by the books and doesn’t like to be predictable. If he wants to kill Kacchan then Kacchan’s dead, that’s all there is to it. I don’t want this to be the end. But until next week...well, even beyond that, there’s no way to know for sure. If this is where Bakugou (And BK/DK)’s story ends...well, I can’t say it isn’t poetic and moving. To have Bakugou decide to sacrifice his life for Izuku, it’s pretty much the ultimate expression of both love and character development.  It would hurt like hell but if it is, I’ll just have to deal with it. If it is, Deku is about to lose his shit so badly there won’t be enough of Shigaraki left to scoop up with a teaspoon. 
 If it’s not, then this moment marks an unbelievable growth for our hero. I haven’t failed to notice that the title is “Rising”, which is likely an allusion to both Movie #2 and Yaoyorozu Rising, volume 8. The latter is really interesting to me, since that was Momo’s biggest moment of character journey in the early part of the series, and Baku is channelling her a bit here, taking over as the commander (makes those TDMM/BKDK parallells even stronger too). If Baku does live, with his quirk gone maybe, this will change things for the Wonder duo. Baku has decided to do saving, and saving Deku. I worry that him losing his quirk would drive Deku pretty far over the edge as well. And maybe have him offer to share OFA with him like in HR. And I’m not sure how this new dynamic would play going forward, though it would also be pretty poetic.
Either way I’m drowning in feels and I can’t write anymore and I need to go pretend my heart’s not broken into pieces and wait in agony for next friday. Never go on tumblr on thursdays, people. Just don’t do it.
1K notes · View notes
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A Review on NCT 127′s 3rd Album <Sticker>
So NCT 127 just came back with their 3rd Full Album <Sticker> and this is my first 127 comeback since I became a fan last year! Neozone is such a special album for me as it was their first album that I explored entirely. I've known NCT as the group who never fails any expectations so I've kept mine up although I know they'll exceed it anyway. And guess what, they did! I absolutely love their new album hence this review~
This isn't a technical music review—as I am not a musician myself—but rather a listener's honest takes, goofy notes, and interpretation on each of the tracks in the album. I admit I've also struggled to build my own opinions on some of the tracks until I listened to them over and over again.
I have also heard there are mixed opinions on the title track <Sticker> and a lot says it's another acquired taste. But I think it's not just that, as it can be a grower, just like how most of NCT's songs were for me. Maybe after a few listens and a right passage of time, it will grow on those people. The bottom line here is, I like it a lot! 😛
So I listed down the songs according to their respective track numbers and followed each with a bulleted list of my opinions and interpretations.
(Viewer/reader discretion: before you continue, minors, do not interact as there are few 18+ contents under the cut. Thank you.)
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1. Sticker
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THEY DIDN'T JUST PUNCH A NEW NOTCH ON THE BELT LIKE THAT
THIS SONG SLAPS, LITERALLY SLAPS… AND WHIPS 
The recorder at the intro boyyyy I thought something was wrong but then I remember it’s NCT lmao
It already stuck in my head from my first listen from the Instagram audio.
With Taeyong opening the verse with his divine rapping, I knew I'm in for a new ride.
STICK-UH STICK-UGH STICK-UGHGHGH
To those complaining it sounding like noise music, imagine it sounding generic. I don't think it would fit as the title track. Not a b-track or in their repertoire, even. They are called NCT because they define the NEO in the music culture and music technology!
It honestly was an unorthodox, just like all of their title tracks, which I’m inherently here for.
Literally, no one does it like them!
The growls and the vocal flexes and adlibs! (You can tell it has Yoo Youngjin's brand.)
The crisp metronome sound that’s consistently ticking except for the pre-chorus and the dance break adds depth to the soundscape. I love how it’s used instead of the usual snaps.
The production quality blew my mind. Like how can someone think those melodies would sound so exquisite? CAN I CALL THEM GENIUS?
The piano at the back, oh my God—Yes! It adds this mystifying element to the song.
I'm not sure if it's a midi violin at the pre-chorus, but it added thrill to the song. It was a great transition from the bass line in the verses to the combination of the flawless harmony with the same instrumental.
"You treat me like a boy, like a grown-up child chasing a dream" JUNGWOO BABY NO MORE HUH
Taeil, Doyoung, and Haechan—the bridge vocal trinity!
But why the heck are they cowboys? I dig the concept, but why? LMAO
BTW GUNSLINGER MARK I’M ON MY KNEES YEEHAW
This is easily one of my favorite tracks from NCT 127's entire discography 💚
2. Lemonade
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(⌐■_■)
Jaehyun starting off this song with his deep voice eee
The song opens to a verse oozing with chill confidence. They're like, yeah you're lurking because we’re cool.
This is such a huge slap to their haters. NCT's not chillin' like a villain, nah they're the main characters!
Well maybe they’re villains, but still ya not cooler than them ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Funny enough how they could have just referred haters as simply lemons whose sour/bitter to the taste, but 127 squad's success is sweeter than all the haters' spiteful remarks so yeah, SIPPY SIPPY LEMONADE 🧃
"WOOF"
I might have just barked too wOW
Yuta’s vocals hooooO his voice just sounds so glamorous mhmm
Also Mark referencing their previous title tracks such as: Firetruck, Cherry Bomb, and Regular (it's Irregular in the lyrics) in his rap part 👌💅
I just love Mark's energy when he raps. HE RESOLUTELY BITES AND STRAIGHT UP EATS EVERY TIME HE DOES.
3. Breakfast
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Now breakfast time, oh jeez!
AAAHAHFU—
Summer 127's bestie!
If Summer 127 talks about dancing all night long, Breakfast is the morning after.
You know what it is.
"Even if I gulp and drink you, it's not enough for me." oho Taeyong no you ha—STOP
Sexual innuendos aside, isn't it just sweet if someone tells you they'd want to have breakfast with you every day?  Okay maybe I'm melting at the thought 😩🙈💞
And I can see myself dancing to this song as I make breakfast (in the afternoon or at midnight bc I’m crazy)
This was an okay b-track for me at the first skim on the album, but boy it grew on me wildly.
Honestly one of my favorite tracks in this album.
4. Focus
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Did I just invade a private call? LMAO
The analog voice filters make it like so.
Dude, this feels intimate in the level of eavesdropping a phone call between seasoned lovers. Then you realize you hear them whispering their kinks over the line and you're ooh, that's sexy! hfgklhfhf
My first listen to this, I almost went feral because,
"I can't wait to eat you…" when it's actually "I can't wait 'til we chill…" aahaha
"Baby call me when you want me." OKAY!
This sounds relaxing and chill. I'd love to play this on a late night drive or just before bed time along with Fly Away With Me, Sun & Moon, My Youth, and Long Flight.
Belongs to ‘make out session’ playlist  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
That was lowkey a playlist recommendation, huh?
I'd be kidding if I don't say I could touch myself while listening to this song AHAHAFGHFJFJ
I didn't know this would grow on me this much lol I love love LOVE THIS!
5. The Rainy Night
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Ooh, the holy melancholy!
Piano at the intro—I knew I'd cry to this.
This song isn't just about break-up, but the heartbreak after one.
The yearning; the remnant pieces from the shattering of what was once there.
I think I crumbled from this one.
This hit so hard I felt like I fit in the shoes with the lyrics throughout the entire song.
What’s fascinating is I clearly forgot the title when I mentally said this sounds like a sad rainy day song from the first listen.
Something I’d turn up when it suddenly rains, just because I want to feel the blues.
Taeil and Haechan singing in lower register? I wanna cry :( they’re just one of the best vocalists in K-music industry right now.
Could have been also nice if they added Yuta to the vocals.
"My selfish heart who waits for you to come back," OKAY WHO HURT THEM?
And the fact that they sang it so good that it translated every ounce of the emotions well even before I looked up for English translations is the reason why I love this song too.
6. Far
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Hmm… What the hell?! Do I like this? Wait...
Alright!
The jumpy vibe from the first verse to the pre-chorus set the mood for this song. It sounds merry and heavy. It was honestly too much to take until I’ve reached the chorus part.
Honestly, I think this song could fit NCT Dream better, as it gives off a vibe similar to Hello Future's b-tracks. If some credible source say this could have made HF’s track list, I might believe you too fast.
Also Dream’s Deja Vu where they go na nananananana na na na~
Playful yet confident! That’s what I mean!
As usual, the vocals are insane! Vocal flex from left to right!
I swear Jungwoo sounded a bit like Taemin at the second verse that I had to replay it hahaha
I love hearing Johnny as a vocalist! SM, how many signs do you need until you utilize his vocal talent???
Taeil's part where he sings, "go nuts, go nuts, 'til we go bust, go bust" IDEK BUT I SNORTED A LAUGH AT FIRST LISTEN HFCAHKFHK
Not my favorite, but still great though!
But wait it’s actually stuck in my head???
7. Bring The Noize
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Yes, they never beat those noise music allegations
HERE'S SOME NOIZE, BITCHES
I love me some noisy percussions. AND THE BASS YO
This screams so much confidence!
The build up from the pre-chorus to the chorus—FIRE!
This song reminds me a lot of SuperM's Super Car, especially with the engine roar samples and the battle cry-like singing at the chorus.
JAEHYUN RAPPING? You mean Jaehyun the visual, the vocalist, the actor, the model, the funny dude, aka my everything?! (markie bb look pls look away for a moment)
THEY DELIVERED IT STRAIGHT FROM NEOCITY THAT'S SOME NCT MUSIC RIGHT THERE NO ONE DOES IT LIKE THEM
When I said I'd play Focus on a late night drive, and if I add this in the playlist, VROOM VROOM SPEED LIMIT WHAT
OUTTA MY WAY
“We got no shame” ouh TAEYONG’S FLOW IS JUST VERY HIM AND HE’S IN A LEAGUE OF HIS OWN
You know what's so clever about this song? It's how it ended with Mark's final rap without any instrumental, leaving you  standing there with a doppler effect-like post experience.
A super car on a super speed just whooshed past you and you look its way as it zips through the road. It's gone in an instant but you're floored dumbfounded at a sidewalk. That's how I describe this song.
8. Magic Carpet Ride
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This song… Wow. Oh gosh it's so beautiful.
Their harmony in the chorus—it makes me want to kiss someone so passionately that I'd cry.
This makes me want to feel love that transcends the universe. Literally, just please take me on a magic carpet ride :(
The background harmonies too oh my goodness—HEAVENLY.
Jaehyun's voice is so warm and soulful it fits perfectly with songs of this genre.
Okay alright Doyoung Grande!
And Taeil makes me feel like I'm listening to old school R&B.
The first time I heard this from the track video, I can't stop replaying because it's just that great.
This makes me want to love. I think that sums it up.
9. Road Trip
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This is such a soothing song for me, especially how I easily become nostalgic thinking about the road trips I've had.
Whenever I listen to this, my brain immediately conjures up thoughts of my ideal getaways. Gazing at the sky through the car window, stirring up from a nap in the middle of the ride, and   eventually reaching your destination.
Oh, to travel around anywhere... (curse you covid-19)
Okay that's it. I'M PACKING UP.
But where do I go—
I could also imagine Mark playing this on the guitar and the other members sing along together, something like that.
Just Wholesome™ vibes.
I love how it evokes such a nice emotion within me effortlessly.
This isn't my favorite, but I still love this.
10. Dreamer
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Eyyyy such a refreshing song!
This song is so bright it makes me want to dance. I play this first in the shower!
It reminds me so much of Elevator (from Neozone)
The horns make it more lively I think!
Yuta and Jungwoo's voice suits lively songs like this.
The background vocal in low register in Taeyong's part in the first verse is so good ahhfhf
Taeil, the R&B vocal king you are...
There's this part where Doyoung and Johnny harmonized, that at first listen they seemed to clash, but it sounded actually fine after a few listens. Maybe it's just that I've never heard them do it before.
And I think it's Doyoung's laugh at the end of the bridge? Oh my goodness I really love this too!
11. Promise You
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MY FIRST LOVE AND MOST FAVORITE SONG IN THE ALBUM!!!
The first time I heard this from their NCIT Sharehouse Sitcom, I fell in love with the song already.
It sounds like something you'd feel from a warm, welcoming hug.
The lyrics are so beautiful and endearing. It's definitely a be-there-for-you type of song that will touch your heart.
It definitely sounds like a promise.
A song about platonic intimacy.
This really fits to be the closing song of the album. It's like the end of it but holds a promise that says “see you soon.”
Because they cherish their fans like that.
It's also like I've watched a movie with a happy ending, where the camera pans up to the clear sky and this song starts playing.
Speaking of ending, I would love to hear them sing this as an encore stage in their concert. You know, that moment just before the stage lights die down at the end of the concert where they send final blows of flying kisses to NCTzens. Then you come home smiling and crying.
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This wasn't supposed to be this long since I originally planned to write this with just simple phrases and emojis but I got too engrossed lol. I also meant to include my own ratings but I figured it’s pointless since I can’t really decide about them hahaha
I really enjoyed the whole album and I love how they're progressively defining what NEO means by breaking through standards. It's not NCT music if it doesn't make you say "WHAT THE HECK WAS THAT?" But then you realize it’s stuck in your head and you’re enjoying it already.
✨ OVERALL RATING: 127/10 💚
if you’ve reached until here, thank you for letting me share you a braincell or two 💞
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heartbreakgrill · 3 years
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hi bb! could I get a cute zach x reader fic? you can take this in whichever way you like but I was thinking some fluff like a movie night at Zach's or he teaches the reader to play video games? you can do it either way/come up with something of your own too! xxx
Slow Down; Zach Herron
a/n: hope you like it, queen!! 💘
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You knocked gently on your boyfriend’s front door, feeling insecure in your leggings, your sweatshirt, and sneakers. You’d been to the boy’s house before, but this was still only your second time, and you’d never dressed so casually in front of Zach. Your relationship was still fresh- only 8 dates had happened so far- so you were still holding back parts of yourself you were afraid of him seeing. The lazy, messy part of you that some guys were turned off by.
You wrung the sleeve of your sweatshirt between your fingers. The door opened a moment after you knocked, drawing your eyes from your feet. Jonah, tall as a tree, stared down at you, a sleepy smile growing to his dark features.
“Hey, Y/N, good to see you.” Jonah swept an arm through the air and you walked into it’s path.
The house was noisy, as per usual. Lights were on all over, Corbyn and Jack were shouting over the shooting noises of a video game on the tv, music was streaming from the Bluetooth speakers, Tessa sat at the kitchen island. Daniel was probably out in his studio, and his brothers were strewn around the living room, watching Corbyn and Jack beat each other.
You felt so out of place in the group’s familiar Friday routine. Jonah could tell, harboring the same feeling of social anxiety, and gently touched your elbow.
“I’ll go get him, okay?” You’d been in Zach’s room, he must’ve not have been in there, because Jonah walked outside after you nodded.
You busied yourself with removing your sneakers. You squatted and gently set them beside somebody else’s shoes on the rack. You peaked around at the door and shut it all the way. Somebody finally spoke up when you turned back around.
“Oh, hey, Y/N! Come sit,” Corbyn patted the spot next to him on the couch.
“Shit, sorry, we just completely ignored your existence,” Jack added on, laughing into his headset.
“No worries,” you smiled at everybody, carefully stepping over Christian’s legs to sit next to Corbyn.
“How ya doing, Y/N?” Corbyn glanced at you.
You folded your hands. “I’m okay, thanks. How are you?”
Corbyn went to answer when something happened in the video game and everybody yelled. That’s when you noticed Zach making his way across the room. He pushed Christian’s legs out of the way, earning a playful punch to the thigh. You stood up as he did, giggling at the laughter the two boys exchanged.
Zach threw his arms up when he laughed, one of his cutesy quirks that you had learned yet. His hands landed on you- shoulder and hip. He gently pulled you into his chest, your hands moving to his back.
“Hey,” he laughed in your ear, fingers moving to your back, but landing on your mini backpack.
“Hi,” you leaned away. His fingers slid down your shoulder and gently held your fingers.
He tugged you behind him, guiding the two of you to his room. “Sorry I didn’t answer the door. Daniel was having me record something.”
You shrugged, “No worries. I got a warm welcome from everybody.”
Zach sighed, letting go of you to shut the door. You sat on the edge of his bed. He said, “Yeah, they can be overwhelming at first.”
“No!” You disagreed. “They’re all really great. I like the energy.”
Zach smiled at you as he walked over to you. “You look very cuddly.”
Your anxiety settled in your subconscious, no longer a part of your worries. Instead, a blush painted your face. “We have never cuddled before.”
Zach sat beside you, setting a hand on your knee. “We don’t have to.”
“No, I want to,” you assured him, grabbing said hand and squeezing the knuckles. “I know you’re probably used to moving a little faster, but I’m just nervous. I’m sorry.”
Zach shook his head, carefully studying your eyes. He brushed the hair from your face, behind your ears, “I think I need to slow down anyways. With my career and looking back on my past relationships, I think it’ll keep me grounded. You’ll keep me grounded.”
Your stomach whirled with adoration. You found yourself leaning forward and kissing him. It wasn’t your first kiss- actually, it was your second. But it felt like the first. You hoped that feeling would stay.
Zach cupped your cheek, thumb just barely pushing your chin up into him. Your hands found his jaw, fingers molding between his hair. You kissed for a moment longer, and intended to keep going, but someone knocked at the door.
You jumped back from Zach, laughing from your naive fright at the sound. Zach pecked your lips and went to the door.
“Hello?” He opened it towards him, leaning against the door frame.
That was hot.
Jack waved from his side of the door. “Can y’all go pick up the pizza?”
Zach rolled his eyes, huffing. “Really? There’s, like, 10 other people here. Why can’t they?”
“Thought maybe you wanted alone time with your girl,” Jack shrugged. “Also, Jonah and Tessa just left, Daniel is busy, the rest of us are playing a game. Please?”
Zach obviously wasn’t going to argue with his band mate in front of his girl, as jack had put it. So he agreed.
Zach went to the closet as you waited on the bed, picking out a hoodie. He slung it over his head and sat beside you again to put on his shoes. As he did, you told him about something you did earlier that day. He was a good listener and conversation came so well between you two.
Zach stood up, offering you his hand. He pulled you up, purposefully tugging you close to his chest. He held you by the back and kissed you again. You giggled into his mouth, feeling his fingers squirm against your sweatshirt. He pulled away, to your disappointment, and looked at your sweatshirt with furrowed brows.
“No, this won’t do,” he tugged at the hem of your sweatshirt.
You looked at him with utter confusion, “Huh?”
He walked back to his closet, voice echoing from inside. “If you’re gonna be my girl, you gotta wear my sweatshirt.”
He settled back in front of you, holding out the hoodie.
You carefully grabbed it. “Is that you asking me to be your girlfriend?”
Zach tipped his head at the sweatshirt, “Is that you saying yes?”
You answered by taking off what you had on and replacing it with a hoodie that the The Invitation Tour logo on it. You followed Zach out the living room again and sat down on the floor to put on your sneakers while he found his keys. He helped you off the floor, like in his room, and led you to the garage.
He opened your door for you like a gentleman, passing by with a sweet kiss. You let out a deep breath once you were settled in the seat, feeling a weight of emotions in your stomach.
Zach got in and then you guys were gone. The pizza place was ten minutes away, but they didn’t offer delivery because of COVID. And, of course, you forgot your mask. Zach just shrugged it off while you felt bad he carried two pizzas and a bag of 2 liters to the car. He put it all in the back seat before joining you again.
On the way back, Zach told you to put on music. Meanwhile, his hand sneakily found it’s way to your knee. He didn’t want to automatically place it upon your thigh, genuinely meaning what he had said earlier.
You wrapped your hand around his, letting your intertwined fingers rest in your lap. When you got back to the house, Zach didn’t allow you to carry anything again. As soon as the pizzas hit the kitchen counter, the boys went ravenous. Even Daniel appeared from his cave to get food.
You stood off to the side, feeling rude just diving in. Corbyn noticed you and automatically spoke up over the crowd of men.
“Hey! Guys, we should probably let Y/N go first,” he motioned to you.
Your face flushed and you felt your neck started to clam up. “Oh, I’m okay.”
Zach, who was caught up getting cups for everyone, sighed. “I’m sorry, I should’ve told them to wait.”
“No, it’s no worries, guys. Please, go ahead,” you insisted again.
Daniel shook his head and handed you a plate, “No, Y/N, go ahead.”
You carefully took it and joined the hoard at the island. You took a single slice of cheese pizza and circled back to your spot.
Christian disagreed with your sad plate, “Oh, cmon. Get another slice, and some chips and a drink.”
You began to protest when they all spoke over each other, insisting. Daniel slapped another slice onto your plate, Corbyn held up two bags of chips in your face, and Zach had already poured your favorite soda into a glass. You tapped on the Dorito’s in Corbyn’s right hand and he poured some on your plate.
You had a restless, wide grin on your face the entire time. “Thank you so much.”
Everybody went back to being savages. Zach quickly got in and got out, leading you back to his room. He crawled across the bed and leaned back on his headboard. You carefully sat beside him as he turned on the television.
“You wanna watch that movie you told me about the other day?” He held out the remote to you.
Your mouth fell agape for a moment and then you nodded. “Yeah- uh, yeah.”
How was he such a good listener?
You found the movie on Netflix and put it on. Zach finished his food quickly, but you ate carefully and slowly. Zach simply layed out on the bed, waiting for you to finish. Once you were done, you stood up from the bed.
Zach paused the movie, “You good?”
“Yeah, I’m fine. Wanna give me your plate?” You held out your hand.
Zach jumped up suddenly, grabbing his plate and yours before walking out.. You caught up to his long-legged strides with protests.
“Zach!” You called after him, tugging on the back of his sweatshirt.
He finally turned around after he set everything in the sink. “Yes?”
You tried to glare at him, but his smile was so sweet, you broke into a grin. “I was gonna take them!”
Zach shrugged. “I got it, babe.”
You lifted a finger to point in his face, but froze when the pet name registered. Your face went red again.
Zach’s innocent smile turned even cheekier- if possible. He kissed your cheek and left you standing there. You followed him to his room, stopping him in the middle of the hallway. You tugged him around to face him, practically launching yourself into his arms as you cupped his jaw and kissed him. He held the curve of your back, leaning into the kiss.
You broke off, breathless, with matching smiles. “Wanna finish the movie?” You jerked your head in the direction of his room.
Zach nodded in a less than calm manner and followed you inside. He shut the door, splaying back in his spot on the bed. You carefully lay beside him, resting your head on his bicep, which he extended out beside him. His hand clasped around your shoulder and tugged you into his side. You got comfortable over the span of a few minutes, at first slightly stiff. When you were in position, your leg was tossed over his, your hands on his chest.
The movie ended and you began another before your breathing evened and your eyes couldn’t keep themselves open. Zach noticed and carefully shut off the lights and tv with the remote. He pulled the blanket at the end of the bed over you.
“Want me to take you home?” He whispered into your ear.
You hummed a disagreement back, curling further into him. “Is that okay?” You sleepily said.
Zach responded by kissing your forehead and mumbling a goodnight.
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why do you still consider yourself a fan of bb if you are just blasting him all the time
Why couldn't you ask this off anon if you're so curious and want to play the Ben Barnes Fan Police with someone that's been a fan of him for almost a decade?
You don't have to like or agree with all of the career or personal choices that someone you're a fan of makes. People taking on shitty, beneath them roles or making subpar music or dating sleeping with associating with vapid idiots doesn't make me any less a fan of their previous (or potential future) work.
I'm excited for this GDT show episode. I am very curious about why he needed to be cleanshaven because I think it makes him look like a child, and I'm leery because Netflix is behind it ... but I'm excited to see what he does with horror and with a script written by someone that I KNOW has some serious horror-creating talent.
I've "blasted" him for taking on a role as a manipulative villain that emotionally abuses and physically maims a teenager, and talking about it like there's any actual redeeming qualities to the character. I am too old for poorly written YA that is nothing but tropes. I am DEFINITELY too old for multiple seasons of overacting and shitty, low budget special effects.
Shadow and Bone wasn't the first of Ben's projects that I've side eyed when it comes to quality, either. Locked In was a goddamn dumpster fire. By The Gun was AWFUL. We don't need to pretend like everyone liked them.
I've blasted him about his COVID travel and his association with Julianne Hough for good reasons that I've gone into in detail before and won't do it again. But I know too many people that lost loved ones to COVID to ignore him blatantly disregarding the things that he used his IG to promote for MONTHS and to flat out deny personal involvement with another person that never once took it seriously.
If they'd admitted that they were actually together and didn't play up the "we're just friends!" angle, it would have been a different story. It's hard to fault someone for doing the types of things he did with her with someone that they're in an actual relationship with, but anyone that had fuckbuddies or hookups with strangers during COVID is going to get seriously judged by me - especially when you go out of your way to hide it by blocking people and deleting comments.
I've blasted his music, because I do not like it. I think the lyrics are juvenile for the most part, and the fact that he's spent so much time talking about how "from the heart" and "deep" and "introspective" they are ... and then he releases fucking songs about Tinkerbell and 11:11 and using word salad just to make things rhyme and then making two music videos where all he does is stare at the camera and look sad because women left him or he never even had them in the first place... I'm gonna question it.
If it's so meaningful to him and such a labor of love, give us more than thinly veiled "well it's not about anyone specific, it's about the things I've felt over the years". Don't spend 3 months as a 40 year old man playing emoji tag on IG and then get defensive when people assume that the songs are about one person - without ever outright denying that it's about them.
It's great that he was finally able to create and release music of his own. I'm happy that he's doing something that makes him happy, but when you release things like this - or take on "difficult" roles or date problematic people ... you open yourself up to criticism from the press and from fans. I've NEVER just blindly liked everything someone does because I'm overall a fan. My favorite band has made a few CDs that I don't like. I skip over a lot of songs on them and even on the albums that I love, too, but that doesn't mean that I like their other body of work any less. There are movies and shows that other actresses and actors that I follow have made that are flat out HORRIBLE, and I've never not admitted that. (We Can Be Heroes and Wonder Woman 84, I mean YOU specifically).
Ben has a great voice and some serious musical talent, but it's not showcased with this EP very well, and I prefer his covers to his original content.
You can be criticial of actors and musicians and artists and friends and family when they do things you don't like or approve of without turning away from them.
It's healthy to be critical of the things and people you enjoy. I have a lot of opinions and thoughts and if you've followed my blog for any period of time, you know that I've never been shy about that. I do not sugarcoat things unless there is an absolute NEED to do so - and Ben Barnes is a 40 year old man (and a public figure!) and should be able to handle some criticism when it's legitimate.
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saharamae21 · 3 years
Text
Vapor (Part 18)
Hey guys.... It’s been a while, but happy late thanksgiving. Sorry I meant to update before I went home but here I am. I’m sleep deprieved and stressed but I love ya all. Please let me know if you want this to keep going on.
GIVE ME FEEDBACK - I WANNA KNOW IF YOU GUYS EVEN WANT TO READ THIS STILL
Work count: 1.5K
Warnings: Language, mentions of kidnapping and violence.
IMPORTANT (PLS READ) : There is two ways this fic can go depending on what you guys want. It can go on for about 3-4 more chapters or about 7-10 more chapters. I don’t know if you guys aren’t reading it anymore or if you lost interest, so please let me know.
_________________________________________
I had no sense of time anymore. Everything was a hazy mess as I woke up and fell asleep, constantly under the influence of some sort of drug. I wondered if it had been hours or days. I wondered if anyone was looking for me. I wanted to believe that JJ was spending every waking moment searching for me, but I couldn’t be sure. As the drugs played tricks on my mind, I remembered the look on his face. The way he glared at me caused my heart to sink further and further into my stomach. Ever since I was 12, I just kept disappointing him more and more. And as much as I loved him, I would be lying if I hadn’t thought that me being out of his life was for the best. I brought out the most extreme sides of him, the parts of himself he couldn’t control. I made him contemplate everything he’s ever known. I didn’t want to tear him apart anymore.
I woke up and the room was silent. No lights were on and the walls were moving in a ripple like effect. I could barely see through the darkness, but as the minutes passed, I became more and more coherent. I knew better than to speak out at this point. I knew better than to draw attention back to myself. As the current waves of drugs left my system, my mind wandered back to the pogues.
I wondered if John B had worked out a way to get the gold. I wondered if he and Sarah were happy together. John was always one of those people that you look at and smile. To me, he always had things figured out to an extent. He might not work well under pressure all the time, but he preservers no matter what. I knew that he would thrive no matter what the situation was. The truth was, John and I were never super close. I constantly competed with him for JJ’s attention and that often made us argue. I respected him though for doing the one thing I couldn’t the past few years, protect JJ.
I wondered if Pope had gone to his scholarship interview already. I had no doubts in my mind that he would crush it. He was the smartest person I knew and that was honestly an understatement. Not only was he booksmart, but he was streetsmart as well. He knew how to handle himself in a situation and overcome everything. He might not completely understand social cues, but he was still one of the most friendly souls that I have and will ever meet. If I ever needed anything, he would be the first person I would go to for help.
I wondered if Kiara was holding up. She had her hands full with the three boys. I remembered always being jealous of her as I grew up. She became a kook and they still wanted her around, but when I became a kook, they were so ready to push me away. I wondered what made her special enough to keep around over me, but as I grew closer to them all again I began to realize. She was special. She knew exactly how to handle everyone and keep situations under control. She was also the most caring and genuine person I’ve ever met. I would’ve kept her around over me as well. I hoped she wasn’t trying to pick up the pieces of the mess I caused.
I wondered if JJ cared that I was gone. I wondered if he thought I had disappeared on him again and that this was good riddance. I wondered if he was tearing himself apart. I couldn’t figure out which scenario I wanted more. On one hand, I wanted him to care that I wasn’t by his side right now. I wanted him to tell me he loved me and that nothing would ever hurt me again. However, with that came the guilt. I knew he would be worried sick. I knew that he would blame himself. Then there was the part of me that wished he couldn’t care less about me. The one where his anger gets the better of him and he eliminates me from his mind. He wouldn’t hurt that way. He wouldn’t see me as I slowly unraveled. But, after how long would he begin to lose bits of himself? Would he close himself off to the world again? Even if that did happen, he would have his friends to help him pull through.
I lifted my head once again and my throat felt dry. Nothing had changed since my thoughts ran wild, but something in me had changed. I was preparing to give up. I had reflected on the ones I loved the most and I had made peace with the idea of slipping through their fingers once again. My head was spinning and my body felt heavy. I was thankful for the moments that I had spent reconnecting with them, but this was the full circle ending that my life was destined. I didn’t die like all the children before me even though I was nothing special. Nothing set me apart from those children and I should’ve suffered the same fate. I shouldn’t have to live knowing that I was the one that got away… This was the ending of my full cycle.
JJ’s POV:
I sat awake and thinking about all the horrible things Addie could be going through. I wondered if I should tell her parents. Maybe they would know what to do, but how could I tell them I lost their daughter for a second time? I mentally screamed at myself. I knew that I should be out doing something, anything, but what if she came home while I was away. What if I just messed everything up further? A million thoughts ran through my head at a million miles an hour and I couldn’t keep track of them all. I let out a soft sigh and buried my head into the pillow beside me. How could I live with myself knowing that I kept failing her over and over?
I raised my head at the quiet knock and a small voice. My name left their mouth in a desperate manner. Sarah stood cautiously at the door, staring at me with sad eyes. I knew that none of this was her fault, but anger still filled me when I saw her. Her brother was doing this to Addie. Her family always looked down on people like me. That didn’t mean she was like that though. I saw the way John B and her cared for each other and I was happy for them. I just wasn’t happy at all right now.
“JJ?” she asked again. My eyes met hers and I looked away.
“Go away…” I muttered. My voice cracked as I forced the words out. I knew she was just checking up on me, but I didn’t think there was anything she could say to make me feel better. I was wrong.
“I think I know where Addie could be…” Her words repeated in my mind as I rushed with her to the car. My hands were shaking and I was sweating. I sat in the passenger seat and tried not to lose my cool. I just needed her to drive faster. I needed Addie. When we arrived at the shipping dock, I thought she was pulling my leg. I looked around frantically and saw no sign of A. I was losing my fucking mind without her.
“This way…” Sarah muttered. Her voice was small and scared. I followed her up to a shipping crate. I heard her mumbling about how her parents use this for storage. I heard her, but I wasn’t listening. I started as she fumbled with the keys and opened the doors slowly. The crate was dark, but I could still see perfectly. Addie.
I rushed forward to her and knelt down in front of her. I gently placed my hand on her cheek. Her eyes fluttered open and stared at me. Tears filled my eyes at how weak she looked. I muttered out apology after apology, begging for her to forgive me. I untied her as I pleaded. As soon as her arms were free, she reached forward and lifted my shirt. She said nothing, but she brushed her hand over my closed wound. I broke down at the small action. I told her to stop. I told her to stop worrying about me. I told her I was sorry. It wasn’t enough though. She made herself small around me. She was hurt because of me. I pulled her into my arms, lifting her to carry her to the car. Her small, hoarse voice whispered softly next to my ear.
“I’m sorry,” she said. I hugged her tightly in my arms as if to tell her I would never let her go again.
“No, no, no. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry,” I said back. I rushed to the car, my main focus on getting her somewhere safe. “I love you. I’m sorry.”
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GIVE ME FEEDBACK - I WANNA KNOW IF YOU GUYS EVEN WANT TO READ THIS STILL
Tag List : @thebendslikebendover @justcallmesams @jellyfishbeansontoast @prejudic3 @jjtheangel @jiaraendgame @obxmxybxnk @waywardbarbie @talksoprettyjjx @bb-tings @agirlwholovescoffee-blog @thoughtsofthestars @outerbankslut @potterheadhollander @baby-pogue @obxlife @queenieloveswriting @rockyyc77 @beth-winchester @outerbongs @sunwardsss @ilovejjmaybank @kaelyn-lobrutto24 @jjmaybankwildtimes @canibeoneofthepogues @raekenliar @jjpogueprincess @casper17 @waywardbabie @iateamoth @judayyyw @drewswannabegirl @maybanksbaby
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pixelated-pogues · 4 years
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hiiii happy birthday! Could I get #14 from angst with john b?🥰
hii bb, sorry for the long wait on this! 
Prompt: “Just get home as soon as possible, okay?!” Pairing: John B x reader Warning: angst, ----------------------------------- You stare down at your phone in confusion as you walk out of work. Your notification center is flooded with missed calls and texts from your friend group and parents, forcing the content smile off of your face as you scroll through the mess on your screen in an attempt to make sense of what was going on. 
“See you later, Y/n,” your coworker waves, passing you in the parking lot.
“See ya,” you tell her, quickly answering your phone when your mom's color ID flashes onto the screen. “Hey, what’s going on? I just got off of work and my phone is blowing up.”
“Honey, John B is at our house,” she begins, her voice wavering slightly. 
“Okay? What’s the big deal with that mom? He always meets me there my shift gets over,” you question, your feet planted to the ground by the exit of the store. 
“Honey,” she continues, the tone in her voice making your stomach drop. “John B’s father is missing, the boy is a mess.”
“Missing? Mom, what are you talking about, Big John is fine. He was just going on a short trip,” Your stomach twist anxiously, your mind unable to comprehend the information.
“Something went wrong,” she informs you. “They don’t know where he is, and it’s not looking good. Just get home as soon as possible, okay?!”
“Okay,” you repeat, shaking yourself out of the daze the newfound information has put you in. “I’ll be there soon.”
Your mind clouds with countless possibilities and scenarios throughout your trip home. You attempt to process the brief information that you have about the situation, but with the little amount that you know, you’re struggling to comprehend anything. 
John B’s van comes into view, parked in front of your house, making your heart jump in your chest. You rush to park your car in your driveway, mentally preparing yourself for the chaos awaiting you before you run into the house. The sound of your mothers voice rings in your ears, loud sobs catch your attention causing you to have tunnel vision until your eyes rest on the source of the sound. 
“John B,” you murmur, the sound of your voice causing him to lift his head off of your mother's shoulder so that he could see you. You hurry to stand in front of him, taking your mother's spot next to him while she pats your shoulder with a sad look on her face. “What’s going on, baby?” His swollen eyes well with a fresh round of tears, a mixture of sobs and hiccups escaping his lips, as he shakes his head in denial. 
“He-He’s gone. They can’t find him,” he stutters, falling against you. His body shakes violently as he holds onto you for dear life. You tuck him into your chest, your own eyes stinging with tears due to the broken boy in front of you. 
You hold him for hours, mustering up everything you could to comfort him to the best of your ability. He eventually falls asleep against your chest with your fingers curled into his hair while you lay awake, afraid to move because you don’t want to wake him. 
“You want me to move him to the guest bedroom,” your dad asks, quietly walking into the room. 
“Do you mind if we sleep here? I know you don’t want us sleeping together, but I really don’t want to leave him alone,” you whisper, silently rejoicing when he nods in agreement. He helps you get situated into a more comfortable position, careful not to wake John B as he tucks the two of you in a light blanket. 
“See you in the morning,” he smiles, pressing a gentle kiss against your forehead as John B stirs enough to wriggle closer to you. “Don’t hesitate to come get me if you guys need anything.”
“I won’t,” you tell him, feeling your body give in to the exhaustion the night brought you. Though all you want to do is sleep, your eyes stayed alert as your mind continued to race with the news. Your heart quenched in anguish at the soft whimpers leaving John B’s lips in his sleep. His fists clench your dirty work shirt tightly as his face contorts momentarily, unrecognizable words pouring from his lips before he falls back into a deep slumber. 
“It’s going to be okay,” you breathe, losing your fingers in his hair once more. His body relaxes at your words, giving your mind a break long enough to allow your eyes to droop enough to let sleep welcome you. 
--------------------------------------- I’m sorry, but the thought of comforting John B when he found out about his dad kind of breaks my heart. 
Taglist: @thelocalpogue @kitluvs1 @maaybanks @thatsme-johnbookerroutledge @drewstarkey @maybankdreams @bluebirdsbluebells @ssjiara @spilledtee @outcrbanx @maebanks @poguemacking @tomfreakinghollandneedsaoscar @outerbongs @ilovejjmaybank
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unexpectedreylo · 3 years
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Yes, It’s Been Half A Decade Since TFA Was Released
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Five years already?  Geez!
If you’ve been following my humble Tumblr blog since the beginning, you’ll know I was not truly a Reylo until I saw TLJ.  Before then, I was dealing with a movie that left me with a lot of mixed feelings.  Why?  I missed George Lucas for one thing.  He has an indelible style that few can match and few really cared about that universe and its characters as much as he did.  I was very unhappy to hear a month before TFA’s release that Disney tossed out his story and came up with something he didn’t really like very much (as later confirmed in Bob Iger’s memoir).  As a long-suffering prequels fan I didn’t like either the vaguely anti-prequel tone the pre-release hype took.  Whatever you do in life, don’t disrespect the man who created the GFFA. 
The post-release hype probably annoyed me even more.  Remember the doofuses screeching on t.v. that it was the best SW movie since TESB?  LOL.  (No, that would be ROTS and the only thing that came close since was TLJ.)  I hated that a movie I felt was flawed not only got passes from the media that really trashed Lucas and everybody who worked on the prequels, but also got lavish Best 10 lists and award nominations.  I was one bitter chickie for a while and later got a good laugh out of the backlash.
I thought it would be funny to post what I thought at the time, with added commentary:
Oh yes, the movie. My mother called it…it’s good, we all enjoyed it and were entertained, but Lucas’s touch is definitely missing. The romantic epic sweep of Eps I-VI, the goofy and whimsical touches, the feeling of being immersed in another galaxy, and Lucas’s gift for aesthetics aren’t there. The visuals don’t have that beauty and some of it is kinda ugly. The creature designs just aren’t as good. It’s not the kind of movie you watch dozens of times to catch little things. Even John Williams doesn’t have a knockout track like “Duel of the Fates” or “The Imperial March.” But it’s hard to think of how this was ever going to live up to any of it any more than I’d expect Suzanne Collins to write a Narnia book as good as C.S. Lewis. We lost those things when we lost Lucas.
I like the visuals a lot more now but TLJ’s cinematography rules the ST.  Still feel the same about creature design; I see better aliens and creatures on The Mandalorian.  One weird thing about the ST is how the filmmakers seemed to have avoided putting in anything at all that we’ve seen before.  No Jawas, no Togrutas, no Twi’leks, no Zabraks, no Quarren, etc.. Just Chewbacca and Admiral Ackbar.
The music didn't leave much an impression on me at the time but now I love “Rey’s Theme,” “Kylo Ren’s Theme,” and “March of the Resistance.”
As long as we’re on that note, I’ll get to the film’s flaws first. The movie has a lot of snappy, arch, and funny dialogue but you can tell the script was cranked out in a hurry. It lacks the careful structure of its predecessors and cribs a little too much from ANH. Poe disappears and you are led to believe he’s dead then he suddenly shows up healthy and hale with no explanation. Abrams’s first Star Trek film was riddled with unbelievable coincidences and unfortunately this movie has some of those too, such as when Han and Chewie just happen upon the Falcon in space. The film does very little to set up what’s going on and why, such as why the hell is the Republic fighting the same a-holes after all of these years. Abrams prefers instead to keep the action going instead of doing much exposition, which is pretty much what he did with the Trek films. Those little moments in Lucas’s Star Wars films don’t happen much here. Things must always be occurring, which dumps all of the responsibility for character development and world building on Rian Johnson and Colin Trevorrow. I have no idea why they decided to be all teasy-weasy with who Rey’s parents are instead of just telling us. (I suspect Luke is her father.)
LOL!   I guess the adoption by proxy thing at the very end of TROS proved me right or...did it?  Yes, my first assumption after seeing TFA was that Rey and Kylo Ren were cousins.
As for the rest of it, I still feel the same.  Rushed script, borrows too much from ANH, precious few explanations/set-up, not as good structure but still full of humor.
BB-8 is a charmer, Finn and Rey (who are so going to hook up) HA!  But remember I thought Rey and Kylo were cousins! have some charm and potential growth as characters, and it was great seeing our old crew again even if not under ideal circumstances. (Personally I would’ve preferred NOT to have broken up Han and Leia.) Hux had some mustache-twirling moments and Abrams was at least smart enough not to kill off him, Ren, or Snoke just yet. Finn and Poe have a good rapport (maybe they’re going to hook up).
Stormpilot definitely pinged the slash-dar.  It was completely unsurprising to find fans shipping them.
Abrams seemed to have avoided the mistake James Cameron made in “Avatar” when he killed off his most threatening villain while planning sequels. As you might have guessed, I was really shocked at Snoke’s death in TLJ.  I wasn’t expecting that until IX.  I was also really shocked at the casual, quick-get-rid-of-him ways both Hux and Ben were killed off in TROS.
The most compelling aspect of TFA for me was the Skywalker family drama, which made me wish it was more up front rather than a subplot. Ben Solo/Kylo Ren is a conflicted guy with a huge chip on his shoulder and it makes you wonder exactly what happened to him because I think he may have mental issues. Leia knows there’s still good in him but can a guy who commits patricide be saved? (RIP Han…I so knew this would happen because I figure it was the only way Ford would’ve done another film). Can his cousin/half-sister or whatever Rey save him? Would she want to? With Luke back in the picture and Artoo activated again, what will happen next? Even though they split up Han and Leia I liked the banter between them; it’s sad because they clearly still loved each other.
This is still true for me.  A few days after posting this it struck me just how nihilistic TFA was because I found Han and Leia’s split unnecessary (had Han gone out for Chinese food or on a mission for the Resistance instead of just being a loser smuggler, it wouldn’t have changed anything that happened in the film) and what I thought was Kylo’s certain fate to be a narrative bummer.  TLJ made me think they weren’t going on that direction only to be proven right in TROS (sadly).
I’ll dispense with the stupid Snoke is Plageuis theory and my dad wondering if Finn was Mace Windu’s lost son or something, though I’ll give him half a point for Finn turning out to be Force-sensitive after all.
I don’t know why people have said this takes them back to the ’70s because the film really is a 2015 movie made for an audience reared largely on the MCU, YA flicks, and other staples of contemporary geek culture. It is what it is and we aren’t going to get back the films of George Lucas and his influence. TFA might not be an awesome Star Wars movie but it is at least a good sci-fi action flick.
I still stand by most of this.  Time and TLJ made TFA a better movie in my eyes.
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bloopbyoop · 3 years
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weep woop
ayo. ive read my scheduled email and its time for freewriting shit again. lmao. I want this post to be like a small light from a lit match stick inside a very hollow, icy, and numbing cave. (sounds cartoonish right? I know. Im obsessed with Adventure Time.) I want all people to be genuinely happy.  Spiritually, emotionally, and physically. Upon reaching my 24th anniversary in this world, I finally learned how to truly embrace all my emotions. Some are more overwhelming than the other, but we have to heed in our treacherous yet perplexing minds that everything is fleeting and we are in control. The feeling of extreme sadness fades, but so does joyful states. Everything can change in a matter of minutes or years. You are in control of all your emotions. You are in control of all your life choices. Your actions. Your words. Your perspective. It feels weird to actually write about it. I've wanted to talk about it. I never wanted help from anyone as I firmly believed that I was alone. Sure, I have a family and friends, but it is hard to see that when your head is clouded with negativity. I've even come to the point where I was too overwhelmed, I found being physically hurt less painful. The pain I felt distracted me from what I was thinking. My mind tended to go bonkers. lmao. But bro, I was so good at concealing my bonkers mind. It's easy to fake any emotion that you have. Slap anything sunshine-y or happy to anything and people would believe you. It went on for years. Long story short, thousands of bracelets collected, it became worse. The physical pain could no longer withhold the emotional pain. Couldn't sleep. Couldn't stop thinking. And voila! I found a good amount of self help books (from tumblr) and novels. Novels that brought me to different places. Self-help books that made me understand what I feel and what to do. I've read that taking the easy way out will leave everyone sad. AND IN THE FIRST PLACEEEEEE, I NEVER WANT THATTTTTTT. I want everyone to be happy. I would act foolish and do dumb shit to make everyone happy in a heartbeat. So, that idea made me push a few more years. Later on, the crippling shit came crawling back again to my head, sooooooo I needed new shit to keep me distracted again. Films, series, music, and short clips from YouTube helped me out a lot. Every single time that my mind is going to think like anything that can think of, even to the point that I was just going to think that I might be hungry, I'd watch something. There's just something about silence for me. Because of this new habit of mine, I've learned more about myself. I love different types of things. I like horror. I like thriller. I like comedy. I like romance. I love all types of films, but there is something about the horror genre that interests me. I still can't point out what, but I love watching horror films. With regards to music, I've learned that I love Indie, Punk Rock, Rap, and Pop. We all can't like a specific genre. It's stupid to ask "what genre of music do you like?". It's not actually stupid-stupid, it's just stupid. Ya know? Anyway, passing this phase, I needed to find something again because it's not doing the shit that it was supposed to, I tried investing more time on video games. By investing more, I mean a whole shit lot. I love video games since I was young cuz.... u know.... they keep u... try to guess it! oh yeah. you got that right! distracted! I love the aggressive plays and trashtalks that my friends and I make. The short stories we tell one another. The rants. The lame jokes. The late night we sound drunk but we are not drunk jokes. The roleplays. The lame jokes. The memes. And once again, The lame jokes. Something about lame jokes and the laughs and curses after that always gets me every single time. Oh shoot. Yup Yup. Few years later, I finally noticed the pattern that my sadness is temporary. I got over it one way or the other (or another. depends on how you wanna read it. i dont wanna say another cause i might write about one direction like what im doing now so-). Happiness is temporary as well. But, we are the ones who are actually in control of our emotions. If you wanna feel sad, be sad for a while. You're getting too sad? Try hanging out with your funny friends. Can't do that? Find an alternative. Watch a movie, knit a sweater. Anything your mind could think of as long as it will keep you mentally distracted from being physically and mentally hurt. I do have a few notes though. We cannot and should never assume what people are going through. It may be petty for you, but it may be very crucial to them. So never everrrr say things like: -Some people have it worse than you -At least you have ..... These sheetsss are annoying as heckkk and could really down someone. I know it is not your intention to annoy but people react differently. alsooooooo, it is not okay or normal to hate on things for bandwagon. that is just plainly crazy and stupid. let people enjoy things. anddddddd never suppress your emotions. admit what you feel inside and try to think of a way to resolve ittttt. keeping it to yourself will just make it worseeeeee. find your own outlettttttttt. hihihi ️ alsooooo. being more spiritually full with God's words and ideas really help me to be spiritually happy. ps. im christian but i dont discredit other religion and even applaud other religion's ideas and beliefs. this is a really long, selfish post so i might as well recommend some things I like : Songs with their lyrics that made me go through life. “I’ve got soul but I’m not a soldier” -All These Things That I've Done, The Killers “It's not too late, I'm still right here” -Breaking Your Own Heart, Kelly Clarkson "And the salt in my wounds / Isn't burning any more than it used to / It's not that I don't feel the pain / It's just I'm not afraid of hurting anymore / And the blood in these veins / Isn't pumping any less than it ever has / And that's the hope I have / The only thing I know that's keeping me alive" -Last Hope, Paramore “There is not a single word in the whole world / That could describe the hurt / The dullest knife just sawing back and forth / And ripping through the softest skin there ever was / How were you to know?” -Hate to See Your Heartbreak, Paramore "It's holding on, though the road's long / And seeing light in the darkest things And when you stare at your reflection / Finally knowing who it is / I know that you'll thank God you did" -1800, Logic "Did some things you can't speak of / But at night you live it all again / You wouldn't be shattered on the floor now / If only you had seen what you know now then" -Innocent, Taylor Swift (My bb) "10 months sober, I must admit / Just because you're clean don't mean you don't miss it / 10 months older, I won't give in / Now that I'm clean I'm never gonna risk it // Rain came pouring down when I was drowning / That's when I could finally breathe / And by morning gone was any trace of you, I think I am finally clean" -Clean, Taylor Swift “I guess I always knew / That I had all the strength to make it through.” -Believe in Me, Demi Lovato "I'm addicted to the madness / I'm a daughter of the sadness / I've been here too many times before / Been abandoned and I'm scared now / I can't handle another fallout / I am fragile, just washed upon the shore / They forget me, don't see me / When they love me, they leave me" -I Hate You, Don’t Leave Me, Demi Lovato “I'm overwhelmed / I need a voice to echo / I need a light to take me home / I need a star to follow / I don't know” -Nightingale, Demi Lovato "I'm a walking travesty / But I'm smiling at everything. // Arrogant boy, Love yourself so no one has to." -Therapy, All Time Low "I tried it once before but I didn't get too far / I felt a lot of pain but it didn't stop my heart. / But maybe I'm alive 'cause I didn't really wanna die / But nothing very special ever happens in my life / Take the blade away from me I am a freak, I am afraid that / All the blood escaping me won't end the pain / And I'll be haunting all the lives that cared for me / I died to be the white ghost / Of the man that I was meant to be" -Ghost, Badflower "Are the pieces of you / In the pieces of me? / I'm just so scared / You're who I'll be / When I erupt / Just like you do / They look at me / Like I look at you" -DNA, Lia Marie Johnson Movies and series to try : -The Perks of Being a Wallflower (The book is bomb af. if yall havent tried, ur missing out) -The Kings of Summer -Never Let Me Go -The Art of Getting By -Silver Linings Playbook -Winter’s Bone -The Lovely Bones (The script. The words) -Me and Earl and the Dying Girl -American Horror Story -Black Swan
pps. remember that every one has their own pace and point of view. don’t push yourself too hard, and don’t overthink. give yourself time, and respect all your emotions. analyze them but not more than like 5 minutes as anything beyond that might cause you to overthink and be sadder. and sad is not rad. hehe. you got this. you got you. self love is the best even though it can be tricky to do. nobody else is like you. you’re the only one of you (i just remembered me.......... i might have hummed it while typing it mid sentence). consider other people’s opinion but do not let it cloud your own judgement as you know yourself best. dont let other comment’s define you. spread love. vibe people you vibe with. ayeeee lets go!!! 
ppps this is my last post bc im happier now and know myself better. i no longer limit myself on the age that I want. I want to live as long as how God wants me to be. hehe. 
x :D
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heck-damn-so-i-draw · 4 years
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The hotel was cheap, mostly because they wanted to save money, but also because it was the only hotel close enough to where they were going to be situated. Once the daybreak hit, the boys were up and ready. By 7 am they were approaching the old farmhouse and pulling into the driveway like last time.
☠  ̷͔͕̚T̶̢̃̽h̸̨͋͐e̵̛̞͊ ̶̗̈́̓ḓ̶͈̊e̴͆́ͅm̷͇̀͂o̶̧͓͛̕n̷͉̏̿ ̶͍͎͌š̵͕͔ą̷̜̉t̶͎̏ ̶͖͒o̵̩͗͝n̶̩͐ ̵̞͙̽͆t̷̩̊̚h̴͇͕͝͝ë̶̠̳ ̴̬̃͝ͅr̸̹̉͂ͅo̴̥̮̽́o̵̫̭͆́f̴̧̊̏t̷̙̤͐̍o̵̢̓p̵͙͚̓̚ ̵̣̠̈́̇n̴̞̓̏õ̶̩̑t̸̬̫̎ ̷̢̻̄̈t̶͖͔͆ȍ̵̪̮o̶̹̙͌ ̵͈̱̅h̸͓̘͝ả̷̠̝͂p̸̮̂̿p̸̜̆y̷̝͚͛̾ ̴̣́t̸̝͆ȟ̴̖͉a̷̳̰̐͝t̷̥̥̽̏ ̶͚͌͂t̴̼͝ḣ̴͉͓é̸̪͆s̴̓͝ͅͅe̴͛̈͜ ̷̘̳́̂b̴̟̦̈ủ̸̬̟ȓ̵̦͆d̵̢̤́̉ȩ̷̾́n̵̰̎s̴͈̈ ̸̠̈h̵͙͉͒̓a̶̼̾̈́ͅv̵̛̺̺e̸͍̓͛ ̴̻͗̍r̵̮̜͌ḛ̵͖͆̚ẗ̷̤u̴̼̿͘r̴̙͓͆͋n̶͓̒̎ë̴̻̫́̇ḑ̸̆͊ ̷̬̼̋́ţ̴̧̋ò̸͕͜ ̸̨̣͆͋h̴̛̲̫i̵̜͊ŝ̸͙́ ̷͇̠̉ẗ̷̗́h̴̪̓r̷̺̺͘e̶̝̟͌s̴͍̭̀h̵̺̕ő̵̹̾l̷̮͛̇d̵̘̣͗.̸̗̽.̶̞̻͐.̸̴͍̗̤̆̾͂̌ ̷̵̖̹̜͌͊̈☠ ⛧
The weather, and ultimately the atmosphere was considerably darker than yesterday, and though the boys would never admit it to each other, none of them slept very well. That didn’t stop Marcel from quickly getting out as much equipment as he could carry and taking it back to the tent they had set up yesterday. “Aw- jesus Tyler! You didn’t zip the door! There’s probably a shit ton of mosquitos in there now…” He complained, walking into the open tent and setting the heavy things he carried in on the table that they didn’t want to take with them. He then looked around. Yeah.. there were a few mosquitos flying around. Of course they didn’t bring bug spray either, fuck.
Tyler walks into the tent, two CPU boxes tucked in his strong arms, (brian is coming behind him with the monitors), and he throws open the already open zip up door. “What’s up mosquito bitches? Daddy’s home!” He joked nonchalantly, setting the machines on the table as well.
“Shuddup will ye? Jesus christ, a priest is gonna be here soon-” Brian starts, then get interuppted by the american who does not give a fuck. “And i’ll make him call me daddy, too.” Brian set down the monitors and nearly had a stroke fit of laughter. “Oh F’eck off.”
Evan took the last three bags of equipment from the back of the SUV, taking his time getting up the hill and to their tent. He can hear someone- something near. It whispers in his ear and tells him to run. Get out. Leave. Of course it sends a shiver down his spine and a chill deep into his bones, but he continues up the hill and tries to make out the difference between male and female in the voice he heard. It was deeper toned, a bit raspy and sad. Evan concludes male as a dark sad atmosphere starts clinging onto him. Evan sets the bags up where Tyler and Marcel want them. “When did you say he was gonna get here, Brian?”
Brian was swatting a few mosquitos out of the air when Evan asked about David. “Well, he said he’d be here probably by noon or something in his texts-” There was a loud groan from Tyler. “Are you serious? Noon? And the dude expects us not to go in until he gets here? We need to investigate.” 
“I know, I know, Tyler, Ya don’t think i’m just as pissed as you? I just want to be safe about this. You don’t-” 
“Get it?” Tyler responded, salt in his tone that cuts deep into Brian’s words. “Then help us understand. How dangerous is it really? It’s just a buncha dead guys-”
“It is not just a bunch of dead guys- are ye fockin’ stupid? Tyler, there is a demon in that house. A powerful demon who takes control of people. Controls their thoughts, how they act. Makes them do unspeakable things, tyler! You can’t just fuck with something you can’t see.”
This pisses Tyler off more, makes him give Brian the camera angrily. “Then you go in there and record with Evan. We need footage. When the priest starts to show up I’ll call you and tell you to get out of there.”
“Wh- But David said ta-” Evan took Brian by the arm and started to walk out with thi, “Ignore him, Brian. Let’s just see what we can find.”
Brian had a terrible feeling about this, but against Evan’s grip, he just complies and walks with him to the building. When they get to the front of the  building, Evan takes the camera from Brian and starts recording himself. “Alright guys, we’ve got a priest on his way, a good old friend of Brian’s by the name of David Nagles. We’re just going to go inside to see if we can find anything else before this guy shows up. Tyler and Marcel are getting everything ready to watch us from inside out base.. Alright. Let's head in one more time.” He paused the camera feed and looked to Brian, who didn’t seem too happy to be here so soon. “Hey.. It’ll be fine. You still have that holy water right?” 
Silently steaming, Brian pulls the half empty bottle, about the length of his forefinger and thickness of his thumb. He pops the cork and hands it to Evan, who, though pained at the look on his buddy’s face, applies it to the rim of his ears as Brian did before, then gives it back to its owner. The canadian sighs, looks towards the house, and then starts stepping closer. 
“Wait-!” Brian suddenly calls, grabbing Evan by the shoulder and holding him back mid-stride. “There’s someone right here-” He steps in front of the confused Evan, facing a tall shadow of a man, a crying man, multiple stab wounds carved into his chest, still bleeding. As Brian approaches the spirit, it seems to flinch back, then puff out its chest and stand taller over the lad of 6’0, mouthing curses and angry words. From the back, Evan speaks, a feeling of nausea and dizziness hitting him in the chest as he holds the camera out to see  “He-... He’s saying to leave. He wants us out, and he wants us out now.” 
“Yeah he doesn’t look too happy… Ask him his name.” 
Evan takes a deep breath and steps forward, listening carefully as words float to his ears. “Hey.. It’s alright, man. I know some bad shit happened but … What’s your name?” 
The spirit-shadow stopped yelling at them, went quiet and stared at Evan dead in the eyes, even if the living man couldn’t see him. The words he uttered sounded muffled, quieter, it sounded like he was… under water.
“J...Jon.” 
“Jon?” Evan repeated for himself and the camera. “Jon…” He looked up at where brian was looking, taking his eyes from the screen. God.. if only he could just .. see it. Then he caught the whisper of something.. “Assholes…”
ARE YOU SERIOUS-
“Why you little-” Evan started, but before he could finish his thought, Brian interrupted with a sigh. “He’s gone… Alright, let’s head inside-” As he picked up his foot to head back inside the house, putting on his big boy pants and gaining the courage one step at a time, he was jolted by the sound of a car horn. His heart racing a million miles a minute as he turned around to see who the hell is honking, he hears a distinct irish yelling of anger, and a phone call. He inhales slowly through his nose, closing his eyes in frustration and exhaling before answering the call. Before Tyler can speak or even say he’s sorry, Brian snaps. “I know he’s fockin’ here, jackass.” Then he hangs up and walks past Evan, who is staring, to the small black rented caddy. 
“The hell did I tell ye about goin’ in before I got here, ya twit? I told you- I told you specifically, Don’t go in!” He yelled loudly as he parked. Brian was beyond caring. When David pulled in next to their car rather violently, he parked the car and got out, still heated. “You-!” He starts to go off again, but Brian just holds up his hand. “Oh shove it, I’m not a goddamn baby. I was lookin’ round the porch so I wasn’t jus’ wastin’ my damn time waitin’ f’er y’er ass ta show up-”
As much as watching two Irishmen bicker is amusing, Evan stepped towards them and sighed, knowing they’d have to cut that from the video. “We didn’t go in, I swear. Thank you for coming, Father.” He wasn’t really religious, but he was respectful, and hated actual conflict that wasn’t a joke. The tall man sighed through his nose in response and turned from his friend, to the man he didn’t know. Right… be professional, Daithi. “Thank you, It’s nice to meet you, mister..?”
“Evan.” The canadian smiled, automatically reaching out his hand to shake the priest’s.
“David.” The man replied, replicating that contagious smile.
“Well, you might as well come meet the rest of our team, then we should really get started.”
~STAY TUNED FOR PART 6~
->
:D <3
Wanna read the whole story without scrolling through Tumblr? Here!
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1BtwQY83MEgIH46KdMA3NPKInBf0i3jiBrdgj3EoJiCo/edit?usp=drivesdk
Don't be afraid to leave comments!
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britishchick09 · 3 years
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1984 livewatch
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the time has finally come to watch the full movie! it’ll be sad, it’ll be disturbing, it’ll possibly be cringy, but it’ll be a lot of fun! :D
we start out with the mgm lion! noice ;)
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epic quote B)
wait why is opera music playing i thought we’d start at the 2 minutes hate
OMG what if they’re gonna hate on opera
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this looks like a drive-in movie tbh
narrator: “this is a land of peace and hope, a land of plenty...” OH SHUT UP YOU
they’re showing wheat like it’s little house on the prairie BOI YOU’RE IN LONDON
this is epic propaganda B)
what if the war footage was taken from ww2 and thus... isn’t real :o
HOLD UP is the eurasian war racist?
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THE QUEEN HAS ENTERED THE CHAT
WHAT ARE THEY ALL SHOUTING I CAN’T HEAR WHAT THE FDR GUY IS SAYING SHUT UPPPPP
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oh no it be u (his face is like ‘WHAT IS GOING ON’ and it’s very lol)
julia’s so into this! :o
o’brien’s like ‘ohhh!!!’
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look who decided to SHOW UP FINALLY
he pauses a bit before reluctantly joining in yas ♥
OMG THIS IS LIKE A SCHOOL ASSEMBLY STOP TALKING GEEZ
good they stopped!
WOWWW DON’T EVEN LIST SUZANNA HAMILTON’S NAME WITH THE OTHERS GIVE HER A ‘WITH’ CREDIT WOWWWWW
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this IS a school assembly they’re going back to work!
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winston in glasses *chef’s kiss*
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ooh a rotary dial! great use of tech from when the book was written :D
winston’s looking over at syme WITH SO MUCH JEALOUSY lol
what if the words they speak are just random stuff with no meaning
OMG confession!!!!!
poor winnie with his cough :(
this confession sounds JUST LIKE WINSTON’S OMG!!!!
winston: “bugger!” he’s a brit lol :D
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epic B)
OMG this guy read goldstein’s book SO DID WINSTON!!!!
i love how the diary is in a brick hole that’s so cool :D
the diary scene was filmed on april 4th just like in the movie so that’s way rad man :D
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i want you valley!!! :D
ooh they’re put a smol scene of his childhood in there coolio! :D
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he  s l e e p
this violin squeak tho :o
OMG THIS IS THE STANDING UP SCHOOL SCENE
it’s not but i can easily imagine it lol :D
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he’s a stick omg ;o
when the lady talks to him you know it’s not a recording ;)
lady: “anyone under 45 is perfectly capable of touching his toes” BOI
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oh no PARSONS
parsons: “choco rations are going up” c h o c o
parsons: “i seem to have run out of razor blades for some reason’ yeah,,, for some reason... ;)
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this is so a cafeteria scene at school
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THEY SAW EACH OTHER OMG
♫ i suddenly see him standing there, a beautiful stranger tall and fair, i wanna stuff this weird food in my faaaace! ♫ :D
me: “this is so romantic!” winston’s thoughts: “lemme smash HER WITH A ROCK”
wait did the lady say pineapple grenade???
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HIS FACE LOOOL
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syme rip boi
the 11th edition isn’t thicc :/
aww winston’s smol nod ♥
parsons: “by 2050 we won’t have conversations like this!” yeah because of screens lol
OMG the food looks and taste like meat but isn’t IT’S PLANT BASED MEAT!!!! :o
parsons just pulled a ‘hey need help with that?’ and put winston’s food on his plate EPIC
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julia’s lookin’ at u ;)
YAS PROLES HOPE!!! :D
oh no DON’T TALK ABOUT THE 50 YEAR OLD WOMAN SEX WINSTON
OH NOOOOOOO
he liked the ‘bright red lips’ yet...
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THIS CHICK’S LIPS AREN’T BRIGHT BOI
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poor baby desperate for money :(
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let’s GET THIS BEAT
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hand on cheek = doublepluscute ^_^
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epic foreshadowing B)
OMG CHESTNUT TREE POEM FORESHADOWINNNGGGGGG
OMG a couple is making out in the bar EPIC
winston’s just like ‘nnope’
OMG THE THOUGHT POLICE WERE FOLLOWING????
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he’s at an antique store in prescott bless his heart ♥
mr. charrington sounds so kind WHYYYY
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THE BIRTH OF A QUEEN ♥
mr. charrington says ‘4 dollars’ but they’re in london??
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YAS BELLS OF ST. CLEMENS!!!! :D
winston: “what was that?” mr. charrington: “something old.” no DUH
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they see each other againnn!!!!! :D
winston writes that he hates her SAME WITH A LOOK LIKE THAT
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OMG SMOL WINNIE BIG O’BRIEN????? :o
his mom is lying dead in the field like the erza kid in ‘kirsten’s promise’ :(
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he’s just... staring
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OMG SPYING ON THE SPICY STARING ACTION :o
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she PLONKED
that ‘ow!’ was so fake jules!
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this is like anna and hans but not as bad underneath!
julia: “it’s nothing!” but this is turning out to be something... ;)
we’re half an hour in and wowza it’s gone by so fast! :D
winston: *gets a cute love note from julia* YEET!
THE HELICOPTER IS BACC!!!!! they’re really not making the spying subtle
OMG THIS IS THE THOUGHT CRIMINAL SCENE YAAAAS!!!!! :D
winston is the best plummer confirmed
kid: “you’re a thought criminal!” winston: *gives a slight ‘wha’ face and smiles* ICONIC
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:)
the crowd is clapping and cheering over the war yet winston’s not doing anything SAME
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jules is just scooching by lol
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HAND HOLDING WHILE PASSING A NOTE OMG ♥♥
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the sky does exist! :o
the telescreen has some great music :D
winston’s joining the ‘big man’s hiking group’ suure you are... ;)
the train is going to the beat of the kids’ singing coolio! :D
big brother is called ‘bb’ yas bby!
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YEEES THE I WANT YOU VALLEY SCEENE!!!!!
the lq audio made the twig crack and the leave brushing really weird lol
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winston: “i want you.” I-CON-IC!!!! :D
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THAT SMIRK THO
winston: “i want everyone corrupt.” julia: “i’ll suit you, then. i’m corrupt to the core.” *mal screech*
OH NONONONOONO SHE GONNA TAKE HER TOP OFF BI PANIC BI PANICCC!!!!!
she really went commando huh
ALL THE WAY
the sex looks like it hurts NO WAY MAN NOT FOR ME NNNNOPE
i’m glad it was only a part you couldn’t really see and not a full on thing I DON’T NEED THAT
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awww she’s so peaceful after big naughty :)
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this is vaguely gay...
aww winston’s hair ruffling in the wind ♥
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c r o n c h
also did he just cronch into a potato???
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OMG THIS IS JUST LIKE SCHOOL
teacher: “when the orgasm is finally eradicated...” totally julia: “NOT ON MY WATCH”
winston is the kid who smokes in glass while julia is the one kid who Just Doesn’t Care lol :D
thoughtcrime THIS IS THOTCRIME
wow syme is still alive?
julia: “you dropped your ink pencil” you mean pen?
winnie’s back in prescott! :D
the room is 4 bucks a night noice B)
BACC TO THE H8 BBY
the modern say 2 minutes hate is probably just a livestream with kids texting ‘h8 xd’ in the chat lol :D
winston’s thoughts: “she who is so careful...” boi she threw a dictionary at the telescreen in the book THAT’S SO NOT CAREFUL
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hey girl CUTE LQ SMILE YOU HAVE THERE!!! :D
YAS THE REAL COFFEE SCENE!!!!! :D
she has so many smiles YAS!!!!
she’s so eager with showing him I LOVE YOU SO MUCH JULES ♥♥♥
she says ‘real sugar, real bread’ and... jam
winston: “how did you manage to get all this?” jules has her ways... ;)
winston: “i want you” julia: “i want you too” YAS :D ♥♥
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the thiccc singer is here!! :D
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she’s so pretty! ♥
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aww the stroke ♥
his hands are shaking as he touches her :(
winston: “freedom is the freedom to say two plus two equals four. if that is granted, all else follows” iconic!
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YAS THE PAPER!!! :D
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it be gin time ;)
he scratches the face off the gin bottle woah :o
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I JUST REALIZED THAT THIS IS O’BRIEN :o
winston’s little ‘yes!’ at getting the 10th newspeak dictionary ♥
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that’s a look of longing my friends! :o
winston: “the call has come. all my life i’ve been waiting for it...” and now he’ll go into the unknown... ;)
AAND we cut to naked julia eating an apple! slight bi panic
she’s touching the paperweight queen love it ♥
SHE KNOWS THE CLEMENS YAS!!! :D
julia: “i just know it!” BOI YOUR G-PA HELPED OUT
winston: “the only thing to do is to walk out of here before it’s too late” thus my ‘julia lives’ au comes in! :D
winston: “never seen one another again” ...oh he was talking about that NOT IN MY AU SON
julia: “you do, i do.” omg marriage :o
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YAAAS JULSTON KISS!!!!!!! :D
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fluffy! ♥
julia: “i love you.” awww :)
winston: “julia. do you think the resistance is real?” julia: “none of it’s real.” STRAWBERRY FIELDS FOREVER!
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OMFG THERE WAS AN EXPLOSION :o
work is scrambling like eggs!
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poor headache bby! :(
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epic B)
winston’s dreaming of his bishy selfish chocolate mom adventure!
the rats were there when his mom and sister were vaporized! :o
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she’s in the dress! ♥
they’re talking about betrayal and julia’s like ‘they can’t do that!” OH BOI BUT THEY CAN!!!!
julia: “they can’t get to your heart” aww :)
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awkward...
winston sees o’brien WITHOUT JULIA THE F????
this feels like the principal’s office lol :D
o’brien’s voice is so deep and british ♥
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the way he clutches the newspeak dictionary is so cute! :D
aww he’s stroking the pages as he reads :)
the oceania anthem sounds russian :o
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YAAAAAAAASSSS!!!!!!! :D
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so soft ♥♥
winston: “julia, my love.” MY LOVE MY LOVE AHHH!!!! :D
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YEES THE COFFEE SMILEEE!!!!! :D
she’s hungry... she wants coffee... who’s gonna tell her coffee isn’t food?
omg i saw winston butt :o
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:)
winston: “she’s beautiful.” julia: “she’s a meter around the hips easily” winston: “that’s her standard of beauty.” YAAAS!!! :D
winston: “the future is ours.” YAS
OH CRAP THEY SAID ‘WE ARE THE DEAD’ NOOOO
mr. charington is loud compared to how i thought in the book
his ‘you are the dead’ should’ve been quieter like winston and julia’s then he could be loud!
FBI OPEN UP!!!!!
charrington: “here comes a candle to guide you to bed, here comes a chopper to chop off your head!” OHHHH NICE ONE MR C!!!!!! :D
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RIP TO A QUEEN :’(
i should be a bit more heartbroken BUT THAT MR C RHYME MAN
OMFG THEY JUST BEAT UP JULES
SHE’S IN SO MUCH PAIN NOOOO :’(
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why does he look old
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awww :(
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delete the drunk old lady BUT GIVE US PARSONS SUUURE
i dread the scene to come...
parsons didn’t say that he said ‘down with big brother’ so that’s a bummer :/
aww poor parsons he’s crying! :(
oh SNAP room 101!!!! :o
poor parsons but at least that scene wasn’t a thing!
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OUCH THAT SMACC LOOKED LIKE IT HURT
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is this leading into the bloody mouth scene? I STILL NEED TO KNOW WHAT THAT IS
winston doesn’t know where he is IT’S THE I WANT YOU VALLEY!!!
hold up this is just a vision ok BUT WHERE’S THE BLOODY MOUTH SCENE
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frankenstein and spirit halloween called!
also o’brien flipped the switch without warning BISH
o’brien: “you suffer from a defective memory” and you suffer from a BISH MEMORY SIR
remember winston it’s all in the mind... ;)
WHY DID O’BRIEN SHOCK  WINSTON HE SAID FIVE
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'how many fingers’ is a trick question because winston sees four YET WE SEE FIVE OHHH
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mother gothel vibes...
awww winston’s little scared squeak :(
winston: “i don’t know... i don’t know!” SAY FIVE WINSTON SAY FIVEEEEE
o’brien’s voice is so calming yet it spouts evil words...
julia immediately betrayed winston BECAUSE SHE HAD A ROSEMARY KENNEDY yet she’s somehow still alive without damage by the end???
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ooh a new shot! :D
they just faded to black and showed a new angle which is a bit weird...
o’brien: “you’re thinking that my face is old and tired...” because it belongs to poor richard burton!
o’brien just yoinked winston’s tooth out tho :o
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mother gothel strikes again!
winston to o’brien: “i love you.” you don’t say that back to jules YET YOU SAY IT TO O’BRIEN BOIIIII
o’brien: “you’re one of us. one of the chosen.” one of us gooble gobble! also ANAKIN IS THAT YOU????
winston just said ‘i love you’ oMG OMG OM WAIT WWAIIITIT
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AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D
seconds after she says ‘i love you too’ SHE’S FREAKING SHOT DAAANG NO PUNCHES PULLED BACK!!!!!
aww he called her ‘my love’ even in a dream
so that was the infamous bloody mouth scene and it was quicker than i thought it would be? at least i have a bright julia smile! ♥
OMG winston’s calling for her yet it sounds so weird WHYYY
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he’s much improved!
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they’re skyping lol
after all he’s been through he still hates bb! :o
ROOM 101 :o
room 101 is a personalized experience just for you! :D
also IT’S A DREAM MIRROR
omg the rats are GOING AT EACH OTHER GEEZ
winston’s squeak at the rats no!!! :(
‘do it to julia’ sounds a bit selfish but it’s the betrayal we’ve been waiting for!
...NOT
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uh oh here comes the awkward reunion...
they should’ve said “...sup.” to each other
the bartender saying “on the house!’ tiredly each time is great :D
winston: “thank you for coming.” julia in her thoughts: “yeah whateves bro.” :/
at least they can still bond over something :)
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jules gin time ;)
they ratted out on each other true love???
julia: “we must meet again.” winston: “yes, we must meet again.” ...they never met again
but if they did it would be a bro time!
winston: “i have seduced party members of both sexes” BI NANI???? :o
since his crimes are like the guy’s from earlier... what if he didn’t do them and was convinced that he did? :o
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in the book he says i love you to bb, but here he turns away and says it... what if he still loves julia? :o
and with that question, the movie has come to a close! it’s a fantastic little film that closely follows the book. while i would’ve liked to see julia with winston at o’brien’s and the drunk jail lady, the cutting of the gross parsons scene, the addtion of the bloody mouth scene and the possibly hopeful ending make up for it. overall, this is an amazing adaptation of such a great book! :D
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It’s a Grey Area
CHAPTER 6
A/N: Getting further into last episode. Not gonna lie... I saw it like 2x... It wasn’t great either times. So. Trying to get through it. If some things are off between this and the next couple of chapters, it’s cause I’m going off my memory and basic summaries on the internet. It’s not going to end once we get through the plot of Ep 9 though. There’s still more to explore. So. I said, I was changing some things, but not everything. I am not a medical expert, when I talk about the brain scans, I’m going off what I remember of what certain brain disorders look like. Other than that: “talk” ‘thoughts’  “Force Talk” 
Gif is from @captain-flint of whom i wouldnt remember this entire scene without.
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The next few weeks were hectic. There came word of a spy for the First Order, and they gave damn good information. However, no one knew who it was. They passed on their information through a network of rebel sympathizers.
That’s where Poe currently was, gathering the new intel. Blix was in the middle of training with Ben and Rey. Ben didn’t need too much training, but his skills were being refined. He was learning to use the Force for good. Rey was learning just how powerful she truly was. However, there were some… concentration issues, as Blix soon discovered.
Rey came forward after running the obstacle course, with BB-8 directly behind her looking… rough.
“Oh. No. Uhoh. Um. Maybe I can fix you before Poe comes back,” Blix fretted as she kneeled down and looked him over.
BB angrily beeped at her, saying a tree was dropped on him. “I know honey. I know. Uhh. Oh boy. Poe’s going to kill me.” He beeped. “True. He’ll kill Rey then me.”
There was commotion behind them near the flight deck, and as they turned their attention to it, they saw the Falcon… on fire.
Rey stared at it and Poe and Finn in disbelief as they made their way over to them.
“It’s on fire. The.. the whole thing is on fire,” She began looking at Poe with mild horror. “Han’s ship.”
“What did you do to the droid?” Poe asked staring down at BB with an expression mixed between concern and anger.
“What did you to the Falcon?” Rey threw back, glancing at the 2 annoyed.
“Falcon’s in a lot better shape than he is,” Poe argued gesturing toward BB.
“BB-8’s not on fire-“ Rey began before she was cut off.
“What’s left of him isn’t on fire!” Poe nearly shouted his own look of horror growing as he continued to examine the state of BB.
Finn and Blix glanced at each other; Finn shrugged not wanting to get involved, and Blix was trying to not laugh.
Their arguing continued, and when they thought it was over, BB-8 then felt the need to tell Poe what had happened. That stirred the arguing back up before Poe stormed off in a huff.
“BB. Was that really necessary honey?” Blix lightly admonished him. “C’mon. Let’s go get you fixed up and then go find your dad. Hopefully by then he’ll have settled.”
An hour later after a quick stop in the repair shop, BB-8 was bright and shiny again. “Alright. Let’s go find Poe yeah?”
They took off toward his room, and as they stepped in, they see Poe tiredly running a hand through his curls, exhaustion radiating from him.
BB rushed forward to show himself off. Poe quietly told him he looked great before turning his gaze toward Blix. He beckoned her over with a wave of his hand, and she strolled over to him, a look of concern on her face.
“What’s up honey? What happened?” She quietly asked as she stood between his knees.
“It.. we had to light speed skip.. to get outta there. Ya know… I’ve gone on many missions… but this is one of the rare few times… that I was scared that I wasn’t going to come back… It’s like… the closer we get to finally finishing this war… the more I worry. About… everything,” He quietly confessed as he leaned to rest his head against her stomach.
She gently brushed her fingers through his hair, trying to relax him. “That’s not all that strange honey. It just means, that you are finally seeing the end, and the closer you get to it, the scarier it is. Besides, you’re not allowed to die. Not until we’ve married, had many kids and grow old with each other,” She informed him, pressing a kiss to his unruly curls.
“Is that so? Well. I’ll make sure to not disappoint you,” Poe sadly promised.
“You could never disappoint me. I got to work the Medbay for a couple hours. I’ll come get you for dinner,” She whispered to him before urging him to lay down and rest.
He laid down with a nod and muttered something that sounded like he understood.
Blix made her way to Medbay and began working there. About 30 minutes before her shift was to end, she got a visit from someone she didn’t expect.
“General Leia. What brings you here?” Blix asked concerned.
“I have been having some headaches. Wondered if you could help me figure out what’s wrong?” Leia answered with a heavy sigh.
Blix nodded quickly and led her over to one of the beds, so she could sit or lay down.
“How long have you’ve been experiencing the headaches? Any confusion, lightheadedness, trouble remembering stuff?” She began as she grabbed a device to scan her head.
“Sometime after Crait and yes to all of the above,” She answered.
“You mean… sometime after you were tossed into space and nearly died? That long?” Blix asked alarmed.
Leia nodded once. Blix completed her scans and made her way over to computers to print them out. A few minutes later, she was examining them with a deep frown. She took a deep breath before mentally reaching out to Luke.
“Luke. Get Ben. The both of you need to come to Medbay. Now.”
A few minutes later they both walked in and began to ask her what was going on when they realized Leia was lying on the bed.
Blix led them over to her, and said, “I’m sorry, but… they need to know.”
She sets the scans onto the nearby board, grabbing a seat to begin explaining.
“This is your brain. See the large dark spot? That is inactivity. In most cases that’s not fairly abnormal, but when its almost the entire brain? There’s a problem. From… from the looks of it… your brain is dying. I don’t know if… its because of lack of oxygen from the attack, if you picked up something while exposed to space,” She began to explain.
“What… what do you mean? Can-can it be reversed?” Luke asked stuttering slightly.
“If we had known sooner? Maybe? At this point, it’s not a matter of if but when. I’m so sorry. I-… I don’t know of anything I can do except make you comfortable,” She hesitantly informed.
Ben turned and walked out at that. Luke began to follow after him, but Blix stopped him before he got out the door.
“Luke. Go after him. Do me a favor…. Talk to him like he’s your nephew, not your student. He doesn’t need Master Skywalker. He needs Uncle Luke,” Blix requested with a small frown.
Luke nodded and looked back over to his sister sadly, before exiting.
“I apologize for bringing them in without warning you, but they needed to hear that as well. What… What do you need me to do?” Blix appeased turning back to Leia.
“Honestly. They did need to know. You saved me the trouble of having to tell them later. Can you have Commander Dameron come in please?” Leia asked with a sad smile.
“Of course. Then I’ll give you something for the pain, something light, to at least take away the headache,” She promised before going over to her communicator.
She quickly got ahold of Poe and asked him to come see her. A minute later he walked in, looking slightly disheveled.
“What’s up baby?” He rasped rubbing the sleep from his eyes.
She nodded her head over to Leia, and he quickly made his way over to her. They talked quietly for a few minutes before Leia called Blix over.
“Dr. I wish for you to make a notice and note it my medical charts. I am currently unfit for duty, and as such has appointed Poe Dameron to acting General,” She commanded.
“Yes Ma’am. Lemme get you that medicine real quick too,” Blix noted, quickly giving her some medicine before doing as she requested.
Soon enough the entire base knew that the General Leia was unwell, and that Poe had taken her place. They both escorted Leia back to her room, before returning to Poe’s room. They both plopped down onto his bed with heavy hearts.
“You’re sure there’s… there’s nothing that can be done?” He sniffled.
“Jedi have the ability to heal, but… when the damage is that extreme… It would be giving up a life for a life,” Blix croaked.
She sees out of the corner of her eye, him nodding. His hand slowly reached out and held her own, fingers laced. They both slowly fell back onto the bed, staring at the ceiling.
“I… I don’t know how to be a general. I’m barely good at being a commander. What… what the hell am I supposed to do?” Poe questioned softly, shaking his head.
“Leia trusts you. She believes in you. You know the Resistance inside and out. I can’t think of anyone better suited to take over. You can do this baby. I know it,” She encouraged turning on her side to look at him.
“I’m going to make us some sandwiches, and then we should head to bed. We got a busy day tomorrow,” Blix announced as she sat up, and made her way over to the kitchen.
Tomorrow they would be heading to Pasaana, to figure out what happened to the Sith Wayfinder and the man who had it last. They ate dinner silently, and when they went to bed, Poe laid down, resting his head on her chest. They soon feel asleep with sadness in their hearts.
The next day, Poe, Rey, Finn, Chewie, C-3PO, BB-8 and herself were on their way to Pasaana. Ben stayed behind to watch over Leia with Luke.
As they landed and began making their way, following Luke’s steps, they realized that a festival was occurring. 3PO excitedly informed them it was a celebration of their ancestors and that it only occurred every 42 years. As they moved through the crowd, Blix looked over at Poe with a smile.
“What? What’s that look for?” Poe asked trying to squash his annoyance.
“Anyone ever tell you that you look very sexy with a scarf?” She flirted as she moved forward, her grin growing at the dumbfounded look that appeared on his face.
She came up to Rey as they were conversing with a local. She heard them talking about last names, and before Rey could say anything, Blix bounded forward.
“She’s a Kenobi. Adopted. But a Kenobi. C’mon lil sis, we got work to do,” Blix answered before dragging her away with a laugh.
As they made their way back over to the guys, another native walked up to her, and began to speak to her.
3PO began to translate, “I’m sorry to interrupt, but is that man over there your significant other.” And she motioned at Poe.
“Yes. He’s mine,” She answered with a smile.
She then draped a crown of flowers on her head, and then gave her a necklace to give to Poe.
“Do these items have some sort of significance? Are they important?” She asked curiously as she gently held the necklace with both hands.
3PO informed her, “That it was to signify your union. In some ways, it is considered a marriage in their culture, if General Poe accepts the necklace.”
She silently mouthed an “Oh.”
She looked over at Poe and then back at the native and said, “Wish me luck.”
Blix made her way over to him, and Poe stared at her curiously, his eyes glancing up at the flower crown.
“So. Apparently… if you accept me giving this necklace to you, we are considered hitched in this culture. May I?” She offered holding the necklace up.
He smiled, shaking his head slightly, but leaned down to allow her to put it on him. While he was leaned down, he asked, “Do you really think I look sexy with this scarf?”
She gave him a kiss in response and a wink. He tensed as he looked over her shoulder. “We got stormtroopers.”
A few minutes of panicked running and they were safely hidden with Lando Calrissian. Rey grabbed her attention really quick and asked hesitantly, “Did… did you mean what you… what you said earlier?”
“That you’re a Kenobi? Yeah. Damn straight you are. Listen. If or when, we find out your lineage, it won’t change how everyone in this caravan or within the Rebellion sees you. You’ll still be my kid sister. May as well make it official,” She assured holding her hand.
Rey smiled at her, her eyes watering up.
“Don’t you dare cry. If you cry, I’ll cry, and that’s not a good look for either of us,” Blix fretted jokingly.
Rey laughed at that and as they pulled to a stop, they followed Lando’s instruction over where they last tracked Ochi’s presence.
They explored the area, walking onto a strange patch of blackened sand. They looked every which way trying to figure out what had happened, when suddenly they began to sink. Poe grabbed onto her, as Finn tried shouting something at Rey.
When they finally dropped, they were in a small tunnel. Blix pulled out her lightsaber and turned it on, prompting Rey to do the same. As they moved forward, they looked around cautiously. They soon ran into a large serpentine creature, who allowed them to move past, when Rey reached down to heal it.
When he had moved, they discovered a corpse lying there. Ochi. Amongst his remains was a dagger that had a strange language inscribed on it.
Blix gently picked it up and stared at it concentrating. “It’s the Sith language. It’s… old… Difficult to translate.”
“But can you translate it?” Poe asked looking at the dagger over her shoulder.
“It would take time. Time we don’t have. 3PO? You got any ideas?” She admitted before turning her attention to the droid.
“Why, yes, I can translate it, Doctor. However, it is against my programming to translate it,” 3PO stated.
“So, the one time we need you to speak, you can’t?” Poe and Blix asked at the same time.
“Cool. Great. So… who knows how to override said programming?” Blix asked the group.
Poe winces, his face scrunching up as he thought. “I do. But. It’s risky.”
“Risky? How?” Finn asked exasperated.
“I’ll explain later, let’s get out of here for now,” Poe dismissed moving forward, following the path the serpent took.
Blix, Rey, and Finn all squinted at him in suspicion and looked at each other, then back at him.
“That was sus, right?” Blix asked in a whisper.
“Extremely,” Finn replied squinting his eyes at Poe’s back as they began to follow him. “Blix. Ask him why he bein’ weird?”
“What? Why me?” She blinked in slight confusion.
“He’s your boyfriend.” Came two voices in response.
Blix sighed with a laugh and ran up to walk alongside Poe.
“So…Why you bein so secretive, babe?” She asked, after a moment, not looking at him.
“We have to go to Kimiji,” He quietly muttered.
“….the planet… where you were a spice…runner? The one where your partner stabbed you? That Kimiji?” She clarified her voice slowly becoming more and more panicked.
He quickly grabbed her hand with his, and shushed her gently, “Hey. Don’t panic. It’ll be fine. I promise.”
“I wish I had your undying hope, but past encounters throw doubt,” She angrily whispered back, making her way forward, toward the end of the tunnel, shaking her head.
“Are you… are you seriously mad at me?” He asked incredulous, running up to catch her.
“Yes. You want us to go to the one place, where you could potentially be KILLED. Just for existing. And what? I’m supposed to be okay with that? No. We can… we can find another way, another… something. I don’t know,” She ranted panic beginning to consume her.
“Honey. Honey. We will be fine. You just said, we don’t have the time. You want to spend however long trying to find someone else to reprogram a droid, or do you want to try and translate it yourself?” Poe reasoned, trying to get her to focus on him.
Blix breathed heavily through her nose, looking away, not thrilled with this plan at all.
“Let’s just… get back to the Falcon. Regroup there,” She said finally walking in its direction.
As they were walking, Blix slowly came to a halt. She felt a presence coming toward them, a dark one.
As everyone began stepping up onto the rock formation, to get into the Falcon, Blix turned her attention toward the energy she was feeling. Rey quietly walked over to her and tensed as she realized what was going on. In the distance they could see a TIE-fighter rushing toward them.
“Rey. Run. Now!” Blix commanded shoving her toward the Falcon.
She turned her lightsaber back on and prepared herself. She took a deep breath and twirled the lightsaber.
As the fighter approached, she tensed her legs, preparing to jump. As soon as it was close enough, she leapt into the air, flipping over the fighter and running her lightsaber down its left wing. She landed in a crouch as the fighter crashed a few feet away.
From the wreckage, a figure dressed in black, wearing a hood and a face mask appeared. As the figure came to face her, she could see a pair of eyes that glowed like amber.
“Darth Sidious didn’t mention another Force wielder. Who are you?” came a raspy, feminine voice.
“I’m complicated,” Blix said sarcastically, throwing her hand out to use Force push the Sith away.
The push threw her back a couple of steps, but otherwise didn’t deter her. The Sith began to walk toward her, when Rey intervened, slashing at her with her own saber.
Blix tried to intervene, but the Sith was now focused on Rey, taunting her; trying to provoke her for some reason. They kept moving away, so she couldn’t hear what was being said, she just knew that all of sudden, Rey screamed in anger, lightning shooting from her hands.
Blix’s eyes widen in surprise, she could vaguely hear Poe screaming about more enemies coming in. Rey looked at her with such terror at what she just did. Especially when bolt was directed at another enemy ship that may have had Chewie on it.
Blix looked at the Sith who stood quite smugly, staring at Rey. While she was distracted in her gloating, Blix decided to give her a taste of her own medicine. She felt the Force surge around her, and she directed as much energy as she could to both of her hands, throwing them out at her.
The Force blasted her off her feet and tossing her several feet away.
“REY! C’MON!” Blix yelled out.
Rey rushed over toward her, grasping Blix’s outreached hand, the both of them rushing to the Falcon
As they raced onboard, Poe taking off as soon as they had jumped onto the ramp. It took mere seconds for them to reach space and make the jump to hyperspace. The both of them collapsed against the wall, breathing heavy.
Blix looked at Rey and pulled her into her arms. Rey shook, soft sobs coursing through her. She could hear her thoughts running amok, one thought that stood out clearly: ‘I killed Chewie.’
“Honey. We don’t know that. There were two transporters. It’s quite possible he was on the other one, okay? If so, we will save him, alright?” Blix whispered to her, as Rey held onto her tightly.
“As for the other thing… even if… you are his grandchild… that doesn’t change how everyone here sees you. That doesn’t change our love for you. You’re still my adopted kid sister, got it? In my eyes, you are a Kenobi,” Blix affirmed turning Rey’s head to look her in the eyes.
Rey tearfully nodded her head, before burying it back into Blix’s chest, her tears continuing, but not as harshly. They sat like that until Rey calmed down, and slowly fell asleep in her arms. Blix pressed some kisses to her hair affectionately. Blix slowly gathered her in her arms, picking her up, and carrying her over to one of the beds. She laid Rey down, making sure she was comfortable before grabbing blanket to cover her.
Blix made her way to the cockpit where Poe and Finn sat.
“Finn. Can you… can you go watch over Rey? I don’t want her to be alone right now,” Blix quietly requested.
Finn nodded his head, standing up. “How… how is she doing?” He asked as he got next to her, pausing.
“Not good. She just now fell asleep. I don’t know how long she’ll sleep, but I don’t want her to wake up alone.,” She began. “She’s feeling lost. Don’t..uh. Don’t. bring up what happened unless she does first. She’s still processing it, okay?”
Finn mumbled he understood before continuing out to her.
Blix all but collapsed into the co-driver’s seat.
“If you didn’t join the Navy, or the Rebellion… what would you be doing?” Blix wondered, staring at the ceiling.
“Ooh. Tough question. Mechanic. Or smuggler. Think I could’ve given Han a run for his money,” Poe answered thinking on it for a second. “You?”
“Pod Racer. Politics are too boring. Maybe even train kids on it,” She noted with a tired sigh.
“When this war is finally over… I’m taking you to my home in Naboo, and we are not leaving my bed for a week,” She announced as she straightened up.
“Deal. But you have to also come home with me to Yavin and meet my dad. Need for him to meet the woman who’s going to become his daughter in law,” He countered leaning over to press a kiss to her lips.
“Sounds good,” She replied leaning forward, resting her elbows on her thighs, looking at her hands.
“My mom would’ve liked you,” She whispered staring at the ring he got her on their first date.
“My mom would’ve loved you. Would’ve thought it was hilarious that you kept rejecting me for a year. She always said, I would wind up with someone who would keep me on my toes,” Poe admired, his hand gently stroking her cheek.
“How long until we reach Kimiji?” She wondered looking at the controls. “And uhh… can the controls go on auto pilot?”
Poe flicked a couple of switched with a small smile. “It’ll be a couple of hours. Wanna go lay down for a bit?”
She nodded her head, and they both stood up, walking toward the nearby bed. Poe laid down first on his back and waved her over once he was situated. She grabbed a blanket, holding it over her shoulders like a cape, before crawling on top of him. She gently maneuvered the blanket to cover the both of them, before sinking onto his chest.
The gentle lull of his heartbeat coaxed her to sleep, as Poe watched over her for a few minutes before going to sleep as well.
C-3PO and BB-8 were charging after the hectic morning. Rey had at some point woke up, and persuaded Finn to curl up next to her. The moment his arm wrapped around her; she was out again.
“I want to tell you, that I love you,” Finn whispered into her hair. “Maybe one day, I’ll be brave enough to tell you when your awake.”
He eventually fell asleep as well.
The occupants of the Falcon were momentarily at peace. It had been a rough couple of hours, and they all knew, that it was probably going to get worse. But for now, they were going to take refuge in the peace. Once they dropped out of hyperspace, things would be hectic again. But the end was near. They were on their way to finally defeating the Empire, they just needed to continue fighting.
ELSEWHERE
Darth Sidious was angry.
"What do you mean "there was another Jedi" Maeve?" He seethed.
"Exactly that, my lord. She was powerful. She was able to toss me like I weighed nothing. She's protective of your granddaughter though. Maybe we can use her to convince Rey to join us?" Darth Maeve suggested.
"Hm. We shall see. I need to know what drives her. If she can be turned easily," Darth Sidious contemplated cackling. "If so, we can turn the tides on this ridiculous Rebellion, and the Dark side shall rule all. Continue with our plans for now."
"Yes, my lord," Maeve responded disconnecting her projection.
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spiderrpcrkerwrites · 4 years
Text
Almonds
A/n: anyway obligatory 'tanya is very fuckin desi and will write absolute crack every 3 months after radio silence' ficlet. Beta read by @thebookwormslytherin and @desitonystark (love u bbs). Desi!Fem!Tony, established winteriron marriage. I do not know how to write children speaking apparently lmao
"Hello, siiiiir! Here to see your wife after a 2 month gap? I was pretty miffed when you didn't show up at the airport." Tanishka 'Toni' Stark smirked to herself as she busied herself with resetting her lab after a sabbath to visit home. Whirling around, she expected to see James with that insufferable smile of his. She saw instead her son rushing up to her still in his pyjamas.
"Hi baby! It's 3 AM, why aren't you sleeping in your nice, nice bed?" She cooed at him as she picked Peter up and set him on the desk.
"No sleep. There is a monster under my bed."
"Aww baby, you wanna help mum?" She knew jet lag wouldn't let him sleep anyway. Childhood trips from the States and back had led to many sleepless nights in her childhood, much to the chagrin of her many nannies, until her mother would be roused and would come rushing to put Toni to sleep by singing to her.
"Wanna….watch." Peter yawned. He was learning new words every day, even picking up some of her native language. He was growing up too fast, it seemed like barely a year ago that he was babbling and reaching out to grab her hands.
"Oh? Well let the show begin then. Fri, where's my husband disappeared to?"
"Major Barnes is currently on a reconnaissance mission. He has requested minimal contact. He and Captain Rogers left a week ago."
"Huh. And I wasn't informed...why?"
"Major Barnes specifically requested me to not inform you, ma'am."
"For heaven's sake, my husband is off God knows where and I haven't slept in 72 hours. Fri, where is he?"
"I'm afraid I cannot tell you that, ma'am."
~
When James stepped off, he felt as if something was off. He couldn't put his finger on it, the mission was a success and miraculously no one was injured, why did he feel strangely afraid?
It hits him as he steps out of the debriefing room. Toni is nowhere to be seen, despite Friday's assurances she's back. Whistling, he strolls up to Peter's room, surprised to see him asleep in the day. Normally the kid was bumbling around during the day, insistent on never napping.
He wakes up squealing when he sees his father sitting cross-legged on his bed, smiling at him. He immediately clambers about, chattering his head off about his first trip to his mother's home.
He suddenly stops when James looks confused.
"Dada?"
"Yes, baby?"
"Why you were gone? Mumma was sad."
"Oh?" He knew he had been forgetting something when he'd left abruptly for the mission. It hit him now how Toni would be worried sick about him.
"D'you know where mumma is now, kid?"
"She's in-inventing!" Peter sits up. "Do you wanna watch?"
"I'll go, kiddo. You stay right here and take a nap, 'kay?" He kisses his temple and gets up from the bed, tucking Peter in.
~
He nearly crashed into the glass when the doors refuse to open. The lab had biometrics registered, but it refused to let Bucky in despite confirming his identity.
He waved to Toni, who was scowling at him through the doors. Showing him a finger, she turned back to the desk.
Bucky dramatically threw himself on the doors, claiming ignorance of the blaring alarms. It might be resistant to missiles, but the lab and its inhabitant weren't impervious to a mopey super soldier. The door crashed open and Bucky toppled to the ground. Toni turned to check on him, and upon seeing nothing but his ego was bruised, she pretended to busy herself on fixing the gauntlet in front of her.
"Meri jaan…" The words had begun to sound less foreign on his tongue, and he only stuttered through foreign languages when he really wanted something.
"Yea?" She turned casually, taking a handful of almonds and munching on them.
"I'm uh, sorry. Like really, really. I truly, genuinely forgot."
"Aww, really?"
"Yes, really." He stood next to her, picking up the gauntlet as if seeing the armour for the very first time.
"Maybe you should also eat almonds then."
"Huh?" He dropped the gauntlet with a resounding crash, as both of them grimaced.
"Ya know, kids are told to have almonds before exams to help them remember. Amma was telling petey all about it." She rolled her eyes but didn't protest as Bucky gathered her in his arms.
"Yeah? I don't like almonds."
"I don't like you." She scrunched her nose and grins as Bucky made an expression of disgust at the almonds she offered him.
P.s.: yeah so almonds are apparently said to boost your memory power and apparently Toni is a troll lmao and i agree with Bucky almond skins always get stuck in your throat and mum chases me around trying to get me to eat them akjdjsjs
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qualityrain · 4 years
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Z - Just ramble about something fan-related, go go go! ✨💫
so i was going to send the suizen ramble page here but the new episode of gq:x7(?) happened and im sad
so disregard everything under the cut
suizen,stormlost echo rambles
suizen 🔹-headcanon 🔸-thinking stuff
(I associate raijin with suizen because shaly from bnc said suizen was based of raijin)
Suizen (吹禅) (“blowing Zen”) is a Zen practice consisting of playing the traditional Japanese shakuhachi bamboo flute as a means of attaining self-realization.
-🔹Headcanon that suizen plays the flute
Leader Skill: Narukami
Raijin (雷神), also known as Yakusa-no-Ikadzuchi-no-Kami (八雷神), Kaminari-sama (雷様), Raiden-sama (雷電様), Narukami (鳴る神) and Raikou (雷公), is a god of lightning, thunder and storms in Japanese mythology and the Shinto religion.
According to a user from Massachusetts, U.S., the name Narukami is of Japanese origin and means "Roaring God".
Extra Skill: Rakurai
落雷 ( rakurai)
らくらい - rakurai - lightning strike, thunderbolt, bolt of lightning.
Brave Burst: Avidyān Roar
Avidyān is like,,, Indian philosophy of like one who has no knowledge (of the ultimate) taken from the book A Concise Dictionary of Indian Philosophy: Sanskrit Terms Defined in English
-🔸The ultimate here might be the Darkness that Hakuzo talks about in the grand quest, since Hakuzo thought that he was the only one who knew what was coming(but it is revealed that Suizen knows too)
-🔸Apparently Hakuzo’s and Suizen’s world is gone, “fallen away” in Hakuzo’s words,(by s’eljah? or kranus?) and yet Suizen still remains.
-🔸Hakuzo says that Suizen knows that their world was a “lost cause”
-🔸idk its just an ironic (?) moment where Suizen seems to be unaware but he actually is?
Super BB: Dhammapada Seal
Dhammapada, (Pali: “Words of Doctrine” or “Way of Truth”) probably the best-known book in the Pali Buddhist canon.
Ultimate BB: Three Steps to Śūnyatā
Śūnyatā (Sanskrit: शून्यता, romanized: śūnyatā; Pali: suññatā) – pronounced in English as /ʃuːnˈjɑː.tɑː/ (shoon-ya-ta), translated most often as emptiness[1] and sometimes voidness[2] – is a Buddhist concept which has multiple meanings depending on its doctrinal context. It is either an ontological feature of reality, a meditative state, or a phenomenological analysis of experience.
"Śūnyatā" (Sanskrit) is usually translated as "devoidness," "emptiness," "hollow, hollowness," "voidness." It is the noun form of the adjective
In Mahayana, Sunyata refers to the tenet that "all things are empty of intrinsic existence and nature (svabhava),"
The concept of Sunyata as "emptiness"
hypaeas and suizens dbb name: Trilakṣaṇa
Three marks of existence
Description DescriptionIn Buddhism, the three marks of existence are three characteristics of all existence and beings, namely impermanence, unsatisfactoriness or suffering, and non-self.
According to Thich Nhat Hanh,[6] the three seals are impermanence, non-self and nirvana. He says in "The heart of the Buddha's Teaching" that "In several sutras the Buddha taught that nirvana, the joy of completely extinguishing our ideas and concepts, rather than suffering, is one of the Three Dharma Seals."
Part of Suizen’s summon quote: To be ephemeral, to be transient—that is life
-🔸There’s something here but I don’t know what. It just,,,connects?
~lore~
"Though its scent lingers, the flower's form has long since scattered. Such is the transience of life; such is ephemeral beauty."
-🔸Connect with the SBB and UBB and all that stuff above because I don’t know how to connect them even though I know there is a connection there
Sages and fools alike pondered the passage of time, each inevitably concluding that indeed, everything is temporary. A gentle, wistful melancholy pervaded their world and was rooted in their hearts
-🔸Connect again
The gods of their land, known as kami, were symbolic of such transient cycles. As forces of nature, they were simultaneously fleeting and omnipresent: like the flash of lightning or the swirl of incense smoke.
-🔸 Connect more dots
Given form, they were beings and took names; yet among them was a human of such extraordinary circumstance that he was counted among their ranks.
-🔸 Suizen being a human once? Is this what it implies??? I’m taking this as a headcanon now
-🔹Suizen used to be a human. I associate him with a ton of death because of the thunder god he’s based off(raijin i think). tldr: Backstory: major character death.
-🔹I headcanon his mother died while giving birth to him. (There, Izanagi found Izanami's corpse. On her body maggots gathered, and on her head arose Great Raijin (大雷神), on her chest Fire Raijin (火雷神), in her stomach Black Raijin (黒雷神), on her vagina Blossoming Raijin (咲雷神), in her left hand Young Raijin (若雷神), in her right hand Soil Raijin (土雷神), on her left leg Roaring Raijin (鳴雷神) and on her right leg Bending Raijin (伏雷神); collectively called Ho-no-Ikadzuchi-no-Kami (火雷大神).) (From wiki. A lot of these things are from wiki. Take it with a pinch of salt.)
-🔹🔸With this headcanon of Suizen being connected with death, maybe thats why Hypaea and Suizen are bonded?? Hypaea killed a man when she arrived in a meteor, Suizen’s based off a thunder god who brought death?? Connection?? With how their DBB name translates to three marks of existence, one of which can be interpreted as suffering, it kind of makes sense?
None can say who or what the ascended kami Suizen was in life, only that while his flesh was fragile, his spirit was not.
-🔸 Suizen isn’t alive? Or does it mean when he was a human? Why does “his flesh is fragile” vibe like angst? How do you know his flesh is fragile?? Gumi i need answers
Humans become kami after they die and are revered by their families as ancestral kami. (From Shinto - Japan Guide)
-🔸 The dots are th e r e
He etched his being not only in the roar of thunder, but in the echoing silence that followed.
-🔸Why does this sound like a character defining moment. Idk “etched his being”. Idk “etched” means engraved, so Suizen probably created his own identity for himself -\(:/)/-
-🔹For the creating his own identity thing I headcanon that the other kami gave Suizen his name? As an ascending “gift”??
-🔹Maybe that’s why Suizen asks Hakuzo about his name and how there was tension between them after Hakuzo says that his name is no big deal
Despite his fearsome symbolism, Suizen is polite and demure, and is said intervene in affairs far more than any other.
-🔸If Suizen was a human it would make sense why he is modest and polite, since he knows what it’s like to be human. (Though his meddling and the way he talks to Hakuzo, gives him this self righteous vibe as if he is above Hakuzo. I mean he is,,,but idk if its just for Hakuzo, because Hakuzo feels that way.)
Not long after, a trickster slipped among the faithful—a centuries-old fox, whose cruel wiles displaced an elderly priest and fooled the followers.
-🔸The way “tricker” and “cruel wiles” described Hakuzo. Idk just neat. Since Hakuzo is an ass in that situation, even if Hakuzo doesn’t see it that way.
-🔸Seems like the faithful Hakuzo tricked were Suizen’s, which might be said in the GQ but im forgetful.
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