#AND TO THE TEAM FOR LISTENING TO ME - OH MY GOD!!!

[sourholland]

based off of taylor swift’s song style

a/n → well i bet some people didn’t expect this story to be updated again, however here i am and here it is. this is chapter 4. what mostly inspired me to try and finish this series is the continuous love i have received through it. there were a lot of people who told me how much they enjoy it and who am i to deny them. however i know that it’s been a year since i’ve updated this so if you want off of the taglist because of disinterest, please let me know!!! same goes for wanting to be on the taglist, just lmk 🩵

summary → he’s the quarterback of the cincinnati bengals, a worldwide heartthrob with an ego the size of lake erie—but does he have the heart to match it? you’re the bengals newest cheerleader, desperate to prove how much you deserve your spot on the team. it doesn’t take much to catch the eye of joe burrow, however that isn’t necessarily a good thing when you’re told that any romantic relations between cheerleaders and players is strictly prohibited.

warnings → strong language, nsfw content - oral sex

word count → 3.4k

reblog and leave some comments if you enjoy!!!

SERIES MASTERLIST

Chapter 4

“He’s fucking obsessed with you,” Sydney reasoned with you, listening to you finally debrief everything that had gone on between you and Joe over the last few weeks. “If you seriously start with all of this self-sabotage bullshit, I’m gonna kill you.”

Lena sat criss cross on the floor, silent and turning over the information you had given her carefully. Sydney was sitting on the couch beside you, knees pulled up to her chest as she spooned more ice cream into her mouth. It had been days since you slept over at Joe’s and besides a few text conversations and fleeting glances at the stadium, nothing more had happened between the two of you.

“She’s right,” Lena finally chimed in, her mass of curls held up in a claw clip she’d stolen from you during freshman year. “He’s obsessed.”

With a roll of your eyes, you turned over dramatically and buried your face into the throw pillow on your couch and screamed into it. If he was so obsessed, why hadn’t he called? Maybe because you completely overreacted after seeing one text on his phone like a psycho bitch, you thought to yourself begrudgingly. He probably thought you were crazy and territorial over guys you weren’t even with.

“I think I ruined it when I left the bar,” you sighed, considering screaming into the pillow again like a child.

“Oh my god, shut up. Men are so simple and literally do not care about stuff like that, I’m telling you. If he told you he let it go, he let it go. There’s no reason to overthink it,” Sydney assured you with a half-full mouth of chocolate ice cream. “Do you remember when I was fucking with Josh sophomore year and found out he was still hooking up with that one girl on the lacrosse team? Lily or whatever the fuck her name was–whatever, not the point–but do you remember when I deadass asked the front desk of our dorm building for a pair of scissors and walked a mile to where his car was parked and slashed three of his tires. Yeah, well he still hits me up. Men do not give a fuck.”

Lena had begun clutching her stomach in fits of laughter, rolling onto her back and shaking her head with tears prickling the corners of her eyes. You clapped a hand over your mouth, kicking Sydney and recalling how feral the three of you had been during your freshman and sophomore year. Moments like these made you wish the three of you were already living together again, as you had the prior three years. Well, Sydney shared a suite with you and Lena sophomore year and the three of you got an apartment junior year. After you told your parents that you planned to stay in Cincinnati after graduation, they knew you would need a place and gave you your graduation present early–a down payment on an apartment and your first month's rent. 

Cheering with the Bengals and substitute teaching on the side allowed you to save a little, but most of your money went towards bills. Lena and Sydney were planning to move in and split the cost three ways as soon as your prior lease was up. They had agreed to take on your portion of rent when you moved out of your previous apartment two months ago, knowing they wouldn’t have to put any money away for the down payment when they did move in with you. They still had about three weeks left until the lease was up, but you had all spent weeks packing up the other apartment slowly but surely. There were enough rooms for each of you to get your own, one was just significantly smaller than the other two. Lena had volunteered to take the space immediately, claiming she didn’t mind the lack of closet space or squeaky door.

Lena never had it in her to mind anything like that, she always just brushed it off and said it didn’t bother her one bit. She told you she was just excited to live with her two sisters, making you cry on the spot and tell her how much you appreciated her. Sydney would have taken the small room, she just wouldn’t have been happy about it and somehow both you and Lena knew she would find closet space one way or another. 

“I can’t wait for Joe Burrow to be sitting in my kitchen,” said Lena, letting Sydney spoon ice cream into her mouth now. “Or what about when you guys are fucking–”

“Lena!” You took the pillow you had been yelling into and pressed it into your flaming cheeks.

“Okay wait, answer honestly and don’t be modest. How big?” she swallowed, clasping her hands together in front of her, ready to inch them apart. “Tell me when to stop.”

“You’re both insufferable!” 

Lena, however, only continued to move her hands apart from each other with wide eyes when you still hadn’t said to stop. She hit a solid eight inches and you nearly wheezed the word out, tears freely streaming down your face as all three of you clutched your abdomens in hysterics and girlish giggles.

“Do you need a third or what?” Sydney joked, already having pulled Joe’s Instagram up to stalk for the millionth time.

“Obviously,” you gave her a playful once over and winked, sending the three of you into fits of laughter again. 

⋆------------⋆

Practices leading up to the next preseason game against the Giants were brutal. Coaches were through with putting up with excuses and mistakes, leaving most of you on the team crying by the end of the night. When they wanted you to suffer, you suffered. Some of the senior girls who had been cheering with the team for a few years tried their best to ease the anxieties of the less-veteraned girls.

Everything hurt, all the time. Your back and legs mostly, but the soreness in your thighs and glutes made even warmups painful.

“Y/N!” Coach Traci’s voice bellowed. “What are you doing with your arms? How many times have I told you that if you can’t get this, I’m moving you back for our sideline dance sequences so you’re less visible?”

“Multiple times,” your voice came out as a little more than an embarrassed squeak. “I’m sorry, Coach.”

“Don’t be sorry, be better.”

You had to get your mind straight, shaking off the criticism and putting everything into the next time you ran the dance. Coach Traci nodded at you, the only acknowledgement of improvement that you would get for tonight. After the shitshow that was the Cardinals game, you knew better than to balk or disrespect anyone during practices. Everyone was strung out and tired, it was during a water break when you realized Joe was perched in his usual spot, headphones around his neck and running through some easy sprints. 

Good fucking god, had he heard your scolding? The thought brought you back to high school, the feeling of getting a question blatantly wrong in front of your crush or being reprimanded in front of the class for talking too loudly during a lesson. That same flutter of uneasiness left you feeling uncomfortable within your own skin, distracted again but pushing the thoughts aside in order not to repeat the whole embarrassing ordeal.

Joe was doing his absolute best job of casually sitting in on as many cheer practices as possible. The last thing he wanted was to cause trouble for either of you, but he would have been lying if he said he wasn’t using the fact that he is who he is to do his workouts wherever he wanted around the facility without a second glance from anyone. There were very few people meandering around, telling Joe what to do. With his injury, he was just now getting back into light conditioning and drill work so it wasn’t out of the ordinary for him to remain at the stadium to workout after practice had ended. He was watching from the sidelines most practices, occasionally being able to do a few workouts and passing the football around while everyone ran plays. 

He would take advantage of the opportunity to watch you while it was the most inconspicuous.

Practice unsurprisingly went late. Joe had disappeared back inside at some point, to finally go home you assumed. Once you were heaving and your body felt like pure jelly, you were finally allowed to go and grab your things and head in to shower. There were two text messages from Joe, delivered fifteen minutes prior.

Joe: Text me when you’re done

Joe: Actually do you wanna do what you gotta do and meet me in our locker room??

This boy is genuinely idiotic if he thinks you’re just waltzing into the team locker room, facility still far from emptied out. You ignored the messages until you got into your own locker room, sitting on a bench and shaking your head at his idea once again. Joe had absolutely nothing to lose here, that much was obvious from the start. You were a completely different story, though.

Y/N: Joe omg

Y/N: There are cameras everywhereeeeeeeee

Y/N: Can you just call me later?

Joe: No

Joe: Just go around the long way, don’t take the hall Emily’s office is on and come around from the other side. 

When you didn’t respond right away, he texted again.

Joe: The security camera isn’t facing the door, it’s facing who comes down that main hallway

Joe: I swear no one is gonna see you, the cameras will literally only get you taking a different hallway to walk out of the building and we can leave out of different doors

Y/N: You’re actually insane

Y/N: How do you even know what ways the camera faces???

Joe: I just walked out of the locker room and looked

Joe: I basically walked the whole thing, everyone went home 

Joe: Obviously not your team but yk what I mean, your coaches office is on the complete other side of the building 

Y/N: Go home, Joe :)

Joe: Please

Your thumbs hovered over the letters ‘N’ and ‘O’, but there was a part of you that couldn’t deny how excited the idea of seeing him again made you. The sneaking around had your gut twisting in a way that had all of your rational thoughts going right out the door. You’re pathetic, you told yourself as you glanced over your shoulder to make sure no one watched you type your next message.

Y/N: You need to see me so bad that you’re saying please?

Joe: Desperately

Y/N: Oh you’re good lmao

Joe: So I’ll see you in fifteen

Liking the message, you put your head in your hands for a moment and huffed a laugh as you finally turned on the shower and stripped yourself of the now sweaty practice clothes. Most of the girls showered at home after night practices, so only a few remained readying to leave. You took your time, double shampooing and ensuring as many people as possible had departed from the practice facility. 

“Good night, girl!” Carolina called out, walking out the door and leaving only you.

“Night, Carol!”

With shaky breaths, you brushed your wet hair once again and looked into the mirror. You had no makeup on and wore shorts and a Bengals hoodie now, which did nothing for your confidence as you walked out of the locker room with your bag in hand and cast your eyes downward. In your attempts to look unsuspicious, you took the long back hallway that wrapped around the inside of the stadium. There was the muffled sound of the janitors' speakers, but they were far from where you were and each office and support center looked desolate and left for the night.

The door to the players’ locker room was slightly ajar, leaving you to glance around again and double check Joe’s camera assessment. He was right, there was a camera on the end of the hallway, but it faced the opposite direction and caught whoever took the main entrance inside of this part of the building. Quickly, you slipped into the much nicer locker room and shut the door behind you. 

“That was twenty-five minutes,” Joe’s voice sounded from behind you.

“This is a stupid idea,” you cast him a playfully annoyed glance and locked the door behind you, turning to find him in shorts and a black T-shirt. “You’re a really bad influence, you know that?”

“So I’ve been told,” he walked towards you with such ease that you wouldn’t have believed he was just bed-ridden from surgery. His fingers found the hem of your hoodie, smirking down at you in his usual arrogantly charming manner. “I’m still glad you came, though. Even if I compromise your moral judgment so badly.”

He is so fucking hot, you thought as he continued fiddling with your sweatshirt. How is it possible to have this much sex appeal? How is it humanly possible for anyone to resist a look like his? Your entire body was on fire, swallowing hard and wondering once again how you wound up here with him.

“I can’t stop thinking about you,” he confessed. “I know I keep saying that and you’re probably sick of it. It’s true, though.”

The pads of his thumb and index finger brushed your bare torso, the circular motion leaving you breathing a bit heavier. His touch was less feverish than usual, more gentle and fleeting like he wanted you to know how much he wanted you. Hardly blinking, you let the tense silence guide you towards him in a way that left you practically flush against each other. Joe’s breathing hitched, giving you those sultry bedroom eyes and stupid smirk.

This time it was you who could no longer resist, kissing him softly as if to say that you, too, could not stop thinking of him. He slid his arms around your lower back, allowing you to wrap yours around his neck. Your back arched slightly at the long kiss, his right hand lowering to grab your ass and squeeze. He somehow maneuvered the two of you farther into the locker room between open-mouth, breathy kisses. Your back collided with the wall to the right of the sequence of open lockers, his mouth on your neck and biting gently at the skin of your collarbone. 

He pulled your hoodie off, throwing it somewhere behind him. Your fingers found his hair, tugging as he marked your chest up ravenously. A problem for later, you pushed the thought away and let your head roll to the side as he palmed both of your breasts through the fabric of your sports bra, occasionally leaving a hum of pleasure against the soft skin between your breasts. He kissed down your stomach and held you roughly by one hip, sinking to his knees looking up at you asking permission. 

“Did you know this was going to happen when you texted me?” You teased, still holding onto him by his hair. 

“When I texted you,” he started, letting out a breathy chuckle. “I prayed to god that this would happen, but I figured you were gonna tell me to fuck off.”

With a playful shove of his head, you looked away with blazing skin and blown pupils. Joe pulled down your shorts in one quick motion, running his hands down your hips and thighs with a lustful expression. He kissed you over the fabric of your underwear, fingers digging into the flesh of your ass. There was no denying the arousal dripping from you, wetting your panties, leaving Joe to raise an eyebrow and flash you an egotistical grin. A breathy moan escaped you and he stopped, causing a near-whimper to come from you.

“Quiet, baby,” he chided softly, “I need you to be quiet or we’re both fucked.”

The fact that he had called you baby was something to dissect tomorrow, you only inhaled sharply at his words. He looked up at you again with hair falling over his forehead, “can you be quiet for me?”

If he kept looking at you like that, you would do just about anything for him. You gave him a nod and he kneaded the flesh of your thigh now, finally pulling your underwear down and discarding them carelessly. He wrapped your right leg around his shoulder, on his knees before you.

“Can’t say that I’m complaining at this sight, right where you belong,” you whispered, cheekily.

“You’re hilarious,” he rolled his eyes and pinched your backside. “I’m on my knees for you anytime, just say the word.”

He didn’t give you even a second to respond, tonguing you with such desperation that your toes curled the second he put his mouth on you. Your slick had already coated his mouth and chin, his tongue running between your folds as his nose brushed the bundle of nerves. You struggled to keep quiet, eyes squeezing shut as you rocked your hips into his mouth and relished in each breathy moan that escaped him and reverberated against your center. 

His thumb went to your clit, rubbing feverishly at the bud and watching you turn to putty in his hands. Your legs began to shake violently, wondering how much longer you could stand the tight coiling in your belly. One of your hands remained in his hair, the other gripped the hard wall for any semblance of steadying as he devoured you. 

He grunted against you, picking up his pace and letting his hands explore as you bit back each and every sound you wished to make. He steadied you as you came undone, panting and unable to move or see. Stars clouded your vision, black spots causing you to close your eyes and breathe for a moment as you regained feeling of your body again.

The handle of the door shook, someone was trying to get in.

“Fuck,” you whispered at Joe, who was already carefully dropping your leg and reaching back to grab your shorts and hoodie. 

You slid the shorts on, throwing the hoodie over your head and letting Joe silently lead you farther back into the locker room where the showers were. He gave you a look that said to sit tight and make no noise. He didn’t look nearly as nervous as you, legs still gelatin and causing you to have to lean back against the wall to ensure your balance.

“Anyone in there?” A man’s voice sounded, muffled slightly from the distance now between you and the door. 

“Yeah!” Joe called out as casually as possible, he sauntered over to the door and flicked the lock and opened it. A janitor stood before him, cart beside him to clean. “Hey, Phil. I stayed late tonight, I don’t know why I locked the door. Must’ve been a reflex.”

Phil nodded slowly, he looked into the locker room and saw it all emptied out. Joe rubbed the back of his neck, swallowing and waiting for the man to say something. Phil only coughed and averted his eyes when he saw the lilac underwear balled up on the floor. He met Joe’s eyes and muttered that he’d come back around once he left, but not to be more than ten more minutes. Joe gave him a gracious thanks and sighed in relief as the man retreated down the hallway and brought his cart into another room, shutting the door behind him and turning his radio up considerably louder than he’d ever heard him play it.

“You can come out now,” he said, turning around and seeing the panties on the ground. He had no clue if Phil had seen them, but he also had no doubt that Phil was no busybody or gossip at his ripe age of at least seventy. 

“Do I get to keep these?” He asked as you came out from the showers, holding them up and smirking.

“Did I or did I not say that this was a stupid idea?” 

“Is that a yes or a no?”

once again, let me know to be taken off of or added to the taglist

taglist - @humannoodlesoup @nikkisimps @teasandcrumpets @chmpgnnlace @hummusxx @rivivie @madsblogsstuff @nngkay @raeofsunshine629 @siutforjjmaybank @alternativemadchen @ryiamarie @ohreggieboy @coldheartedmar @obsessed-fan-alert @buckystwilight @dessxoxsworld @manic-pixie-bitch2 @hallecarey1 @heyitskay-21 @joselyn001 @stylesyourmine @toterry @countryday @adventuremood @blu3jeanbaby @sriusun @mikeyspinkcup @kittyhorror777 @riverdalexvixens @hornyforherbert @nhlbabes @unsaidjaelinrose @joselyn001 @littlelou22

#joe burrow fan fic #joe burrow imagine #joe burrow smut #joe burrow imagines #joe shiesty #joe burrow angst #joe burrow x yn #joe burrow blurb #joe burrow x reader #joe burrow fluff #joe burrow fic

[onesidedradiostatic]

(After the Respectless Reprise)

Velvette, calling Vox on the phone: VOX!!! End this stypid debate once and for all! What was the color of your turtleneck when you took that damned picture with Valentino?

Vox, picking up the call: Uh... What now?

Velvette: Some of your crazy "fans" cropped that stupid picture I took of you two near his desk with your monitors! They've been going crazy at the color of your stupid turtleneck in the leaked photo

Vox: Right right.... and..... This is my problem because....?

Velvette, muttering under her breath: I swear to god... this is just like that stupid dress thing all over again.....

Vox: The what now?

Velvette: Forget it! Your old arse wouldn't even get it anyway and we don't have the time! That stupid thing blew out of proportion!!! It's been trending on Vitter for Hell's sake so you better do something about it!

Vox: Vel, I don't see the problem. It's just a color for something that happened a long time ago. It shouldn't even matter.

Velvette: Well it does matter because demons—not even just sinners, Vox— have been going at each other's throats about this for hours on end just for the sake of their fanart consistency!

Vox: Fanart consistency?

Velvette: Oh for fuck's sakes, Vox— Aren't you connected to your network right now? You should be able to see just how bad it is in there!!

Vox: Mhm... yeah, yeah... well..... right...

Velvette: Vox. Are you listening to me right now?

Vox: *noncommittal hum* Yeah..... That's better...

*Velvette pauses for a moment before a look of realization crosses her face*

Velvette: Wait... Don't tell me your at your Alastor shrine again instead of at your office?

*Clatter clatter CRASHHH*

Vox: *cough cough cough* H-Huh? What? NOOOOooo... No, no I'm not. What are you talking about Velvette?

*Velvette side glances at Alastor still silently having his mental breakdown before moving onto Lucifer fiddling with his tie and cane as he refuses to meet anyone in the eyes*

Velvette: Yeaaah.... Right.

Vox: A-ActUALLY!! I was just about to go there. To— to my office I mean. I mean, I just came from an important meeting after all!! Yes, a very very important meeting. With uh.... About– Sinflix! Yes, yes Sinflix. You know how that annoying little parasite has been taking some of our profits with all their 'free services' shtick that we've been losing money in the other Rings.

Velvette: Right. Right. (I don't care)So... your turtleneck color?

Vox: RIGHT!!! *Ding ding ding!* Yeah, about that I uh....

*Side glances at the scarce remains of his closet that was once full of multiple variations of turtlenecks colored red, orange, yellow, and even blue. Some of them actually being striped. There was a sell in one of the secondhand-me-down shops if you buy in bulk back in the day when he first fell into Hell. And he wasn't one to pass up a bang for your buck. Unfortunately, he also had to burn a lot of them after Velvette joined team to avoid her wrath. And now he can't remember which one he wore during that picture*

Vox: Well... About that, I don't.... actually remember?

Velvette: You don't sound so sure of yourself.

Vox: Well, the picture itself is faded so some of the color has changed. Not to mention the lightning.

Let me ask Tino if he remembers.

(I hope you enjoy this. Someone please sedate me)

oh my fucking god (reference to this, and this, and the turtleneck discourse is just this entire fucking tag. basically we've been spending the last 2 days debating about vox's stupid fucking turtleneck)

literally everything being referenced is giving me fucking whiplash HELSPGKOS vox himself getting into the debate because he doesn't remember is hilarious

only thing I will have to correct there is that vox does in fact own netflix in hell so it's voxflix not sinflix

considering maintagging this and putting it out into the wild with zero context (until they check the links)

EDIT:

misunderstood whoops here's the clarification LMAO

#ask #osrs.txt #hazbin velvette #hazbin hotel velvette #velvette #hazbin vox #hazbin hotel vox #vox #radiostatic #staticradio #onewaybroadcast #vox's stupid fucking turtleneck #respectless anons #lucifer's commissions saga #am I really tagging 3 of these in a single fucking post holy shit

[littlecrittereli]

Doodle suggestions? Gotcha The crew in some comfy PJs because WHY DON'T THEY HAVE ANYYYYY

I was just going to do a quick doodle but I ended up liking it so much I made it into a full out drawing um...

They are having a silly game night :)

#Listen..... Team Tortuga as found family..... #they are EVERYTHINGG TOOO MEEEEEEEE #I feel like we don't get enough content of them just... being friends #BECAUSE THEY ARE BEST FRIENDS #They literally live together wHY DO WE NOT CONSIDER THIS MORE #and they were roomates............ oh my god they were roomates.... #The younger sibling experience of watching ur older sibling play video games #Im so sorry im crying and throwing up in the tags i just care so much plEASE GIVE ME MORE TORTUGA FAMILY CONTENT #wild kratts #chris kratt #martin kratt #wild kratts aviva #wild kratts koki #jimmy z #wild kratts fanart #wk fanart #littlecrittereli #fanart

[fujii-draws]

Realized now that the first time Dusknoir unhinged his stomach mouth wasn’t during the stoneship fight but ACTUALLY right before the betrayal???

NO WONDER HERO AND PARTNER WERE SO AFRAID.

#I ALWAYS THOUGHT IT WAS THE ‘’READY-TO-GRAB’’ MOTION THAT SHOCKED THEM BUT NO. #NOT ONLY THAT. BUT THE REST OF THE TOWN ONLY REACT WHEN THEY’RE ACTUALLY GRABBED. #<<<(which makes me wonder if Dusknoir whispered ‘Or is it?’ to these two oh my fucking god.) #(probably not but that would be so raw) #listen to me. LISTEN TO ME. #HE WAS NOTHING BUT KIND (DECEPTIVELY AT TIMES) UP UNTIL THAT POINT. #HE NEVER DID THAT BEFORE. NOT EVEN AT TEAM SKULL. #SO HERO AND PARTNER GENUINELY GOT SCARED #GWAAAH I LOVE NOTICING DETAILS LIKE THAT #NOT SURE HOW I MISSED THIS THE FIRST TIME #but GOD does it add onto the fear those two felt. him going from genuinely helpful and sweet to showing his true colors #FUCKKK I WANT TO REDRAW THIS SCENE AGAINN #anyways going insane over this ghost at 2am #pmd eos spoilers

[flamingwordsinthesky]

That little girl is me every time these two appear in a panel together.

Marvel Team Up #89

#spider man #comics #reading through comics #marvel team up #nightspider #kurtpeter #listen I'm a sucker for a rare pair #nightcrawler #nightcrawler x spiderman #them: have a few team ups that are few and far between #me: Oh my God they interacted!

[keepyourpantsongohan]

Yamato in Naruto Shippuden OP2: “Distance” by LONG SHOT PARTY (1/9)

#yamato tenzo #yamato #tenzou #team 7 #kakashi hatake #kabuto yakushi #sai #iruka umino #jiraiya #tsunade senju #when he goes :D #i hold this opening personally responsible for giving me yamato disorder #particularly the fourth shot. i was like. oh my god i'm listening #i'm going on a yamato search in the op and ed #u def were not meant to pause on half of these kjhgkgjh #ALSO tenzo mimicking kakashi's posture with his team #it's their extremely normal version of a matching t-shirt. goodbye #naruto series #ayesha talks anime #naruto ops #episodecaps #yamato ops and eds #naruto shippuden

[todayisafridaynight]

sorry if this is out of the blue guys but i think my brain just decided to convert me to being an adachi stan

#snap chats #again technically speaking #ANYWAY NO LISTEN THIS THE FUNNIEST THING EVER AND IM SO VERY CONFUSED #i havent had a dream that wasnt a nightmare about my mom in like Ever and the one time i do has got to be. The Coziest Shit #ive only ever had like one or three rgg dreams and half of them Vaguely had aoki in it so this is the funniest curve ever #you will read my dream summary we are at a sleepover motherfucker #do i even remember exactly what happened NO i just remember being in a lobby with some other bitches #and one of them Other Bitches included adachi. im pretty nanba was also there? iunno cant remember piss #point is i just hung out with adachi for like 80% of the shit. oh my god no i remember ichiban was there #and this is a significant detail for a thing adachi said to me BECAUSE ichiban was there and vaervLKjve #FUNNIEST DREAM OF MY LIFE but also the coziest one but also mr adachi... can we hang out again:( #blaming the fact i had my kirby plush for this one since it's round and soft like he was </3 #ok bye thats all i should be legally allowed to divulge bout my sicko dreams #it was just very funny waking up at the asscrack of dawn and being like Hang On....... What Was That..... #be yeah im an adachi stan now sorry team </3 maybe one day ill dream about one of my guys #tho i cant forget that period where i did just have ttm dreams for like. a week straight.... ok byebye fr now

[chloeseyeliner]

fun (ha) facts about me, i have reached the point where i can feel my heart physically shatter whenever i hear someone sharply telling someone else, even in a playful context, that they are talking too much/too loud/too passionately, and then that person just. loses all the light in their eyes and. stops talking or is quieter.

#like my parents have said that to me all my life but i think i am just numb about it nowadays?? idk #(it hurts i know it hurts i just don't... feel it) #and it hurts that i remember to have said sharply to one of my childhood friends to just stop talking twice or thrice #maybe bc of that #but i was a child and we still are friends and they are rambling on and on in front of me #so i guess they feel safe (they should i would listen to them forever) #but when i hear eg grown ups say that to children or 'more' grown ups to other adults #it just... stings a lot #you can see their smile drop #it's so bad #i was near a situation like this the other day #and i was like 'oh it happens in discussions! we get carried away sometimes that's okay!' #bc the person was so sad #and the person who told them so just... didn't utter a word #so i tried to comfort them since i was a part of the team #but they were so sad #anyway #i am sorry for my lack of vocabulary skills #just needed to get this out #especially if that person is neurodivergent... god it's likely so heart-breaking for them #ramble people #a random tiny tumblr blog loves you and your words so much #be kind #be patient #maria's random thoughts #rambles #ugh

[astrxealis]

shadowbringers musicebbajgeghbahebjgb some lyrics!

“in monochrome melodies, our tears are painted in red”

“we’re nothing more than scions and sinners”

the whole of ‘to the edge’ tbh. that stuff absolutely ruins me always

“like broken angels, wingless, cast from heaven's gates (our slumbering demons awake) / we only fly when falling, falling far from grace (hell take us, heaven can wait)”

“the road that we walk, is lost in the flood / here proud angels bathe in their wages of blood”

“AUTHORS OF OUR FATE, ORCHESTRATE OUR FALL FROM GRACE, POOREST PLAYERS ON THE STAGE, OUR DEFIANCE STRIVES US STRAIGHT TO THE EDGE”

“A REFLECTION IN THE GLASS, RECOLLECTIONS OF OUR PAST, SWIFT AS DARKNESS COLD AS ASH, FAR BEYOND THIS DREAM OF PARADISE LOST”

as you can tell i especially love those two. and everything tbh. but i’m listening to ‘shadowbringers’ rn so hi (’to the edge’ makes me so emotional though everytime)

“riding home, dying hope, hold onto hope...”

all lyrics in the shadowbringers expansion tbh. and the whole of ffxiv

THE LYRICS IN RELATION TO THE STORY. AND EVEN WITHOUT. IT IS JUST SO GOOD

shadowbringers is literally the best i am so obsessed with it i am so in love with it shb means everything to me omfg

this post is about lyics so i will stave off the want to talk about the music symbolisms and all haha. also no spoilers btw so dw

“la-hee” :))

“for whom weeps the storm, her tears on our skin”

“STAND TALL, MY FRIEND” <//3 <33

tomorrow and tomorrow always ruins me

#⋯ ꒰ა starry thoughts ໒꒱ *·˚ #⋯ ꒰ა ffxiv ໒꒱ *·˚ #⋯ ꒰ა ‹𝟹 ໒꒱ *·˚ #writing this hurt me !!! shb . to the edge. 5.0 to 5.3 oh my god that is the best piece of writing i have ever seen in my LIFE #it is just too good. way too good. aghbehgjabe (please play ffxiv. or at least listen to the music bcs soken and the team are GODS) #(also please ask me for my personal faves and/or recs haha /nf) #the lyrics are just too good my head will explode if i try to think about it properly rn. and then i'll start crying even if theres no #reason to and OH MY GODDD THE MUSIC IS SO GOOD THE MUSIC IS SO GOOD (listening to the main theme/the one in the trailer rn) #THE AMOUTN FO 'WE FALL'S IN INSATIABLE AGEBGJHBAEGJHBAEJGH AND. AND. AND. INSANITY IS JUST TOO GOOD !!! #the villain song that plays is sooo. it screams theatre madlad and that is SO emet-selch. #THE WAY . THAT. WITHT HE STORY. THE DAY AND NIGHT THEMES AND ALL AND AND AND AND!!!!!!JHBTJHBJHTBJHAHBDahjgbjs #about to cry just from the thought of shb <- daily occurrence #'WHAT ANGEL WAKES ME' IS SO GOOD TOO!! and then the uhm. the 4 beat thing i forgot what it is called bcs bcs bcs YEAH #AND THE REFERENCES TO DANCES AND SHAKESPEARE AND !!!!! OH MY GOD #hi i am so passionate about ffxiv and its music (please don't ask me about it. i will never stop talking.) #(please ask me about it actually)

[noxtivagus]

NO THOUGHTS ONLY SHADOWBRINGERS HFALKDSJFASLKD

#🌙.rambles #[ ffxiv. ] #sorry my head is like . ffxiv. yes. empty. just ffxiv. #i love love love love themes w like. apocalypses? the world ending wtvr yk. HDLFKAJDLFKS.. SHADOWBRINGERS. IS. SO. #okay i cld ramble on n on about each of the expansions n they're all equally special to me but i want to ramble about shb rn #i started ffxiv during shadowbringers so the expansion is. yeah. YEAH 🥹 #emet-selch.. he's srs my favorite antag ever. maybe hermes too if he counts idk but they're not necessarily cruel 'villains' #they're so human they're so goddamn human n it touches me so much i love them they own my heart #listening to ffxiv ost just gets me like this thank you soken thank you to the ffxiv team i love you guys so much thank you thank you #eulmore ost w. pain in pleasure & indulgence & masquerade. THE DEVELOPMENT FROM THE START OF THE GAME TO ENDGAME #IS SO GOOD. I LOVE IT. n then grr i love songs w yk the waltz yk or rlly just stuff like this so much it's just so pleasing to my ears #it sounds like heaven. n then. the scenarios it brings in my mind! i love fantasy worlds so much they mean so much to me #huh. realizing once more i rlly like a lot of charas that end up destroying the world one way or another. or wanted to or smth #sephiroth. lucilius. n yh emet-selch & hermes as i mentioned. #i cld ramble on so much abt emet-selch oh dear help me i'm still not over the 'angel of truth' thing n then. azemet T_T #azemet srs is like my otp. or uh. idk a lot of ff pairing r my otps #AZEMET. THE ANGST. hdfjasdlkf emet w azem n hyth hehe his friends r so. chaotic canonically. emet probably doesn't look the part w #idk bcs he looks so grumpy n old lol but he's rlly so kind at heart 🥺 i'm sorry i'm head over heels he's so ugly /lh i love him #ffxiv ost just has this. oh my god. it's so good. it fits so much w just every aspect in the whole game n i'm not exaggerating at all #when i say i know them all so well by heart. i could ramble for hours n days on each song in the whole game n what they mean to me #i love. ffxiv so much. the recurring themes n the way they tie stuff up together is just smth i've always loved nn #ffxiv's story was smth i looked for my whole life before finding out abt the game? idk the game rlly just means so much to me #one day. one day i'll create something of my own. smth like what ffxiv means to me but.. smth entirely my own. #goddamn i'm genuinely still very anxious n nervous abt the future. n like this year yh but. i'm even more excited. #i want to do a lot i. i want to reach out to tomorrow. i want to reach my dreams!!!! i'll reach. even further. forge ahead #help it's 1 am wnvr it's later into the night i usually end up rambling like this huh. #don't mine me i rlly just like writing n i talk to myself often 😭 i'm a bit tired for other stuff tonight but. #thinking of. stories or wtvr just refreshing my mind. i love ffxiv so much :<< all these stories mean so much to me.. #yk what i'll just do more tmrrw i just want to take this time rn for myself #hdjfaklsdf i love music. n video games. n stories n idk just all of it just HDLFKAJSDLF.. i'm so in love w them all i just appreciate it sm

[crossbackpoke-check]

Hi! Its the Anon re Mo and Zegras hanging out. So I got this from the interview of Mo on the spitting chiclets podcast (which...I really dont like spitting chiclets but I had to listen bc Mo). But if you want to listen to it, the interview (either podcast or youtube version) as a whole is like an hour and is incredibly interesting and the part re zegras is brief at 2 hours 1 min if you would like - Mo apparently chilled with the U18 USNDTP guys so it fits your story! Thanks again for your lovely thought spirals!

😪 literally just listened to the broadscast round table discussion on hockey media today lmao so my ire for sp*tting ch*clets is even more than normal! which is quite a lot! thank you for your service (✊😔 listening to That Podcast and sharing the important information so the rest of us may have content without suffering)

on a better note OH MY GOD i’m???? no words. how would they interact the dynamic this now gives the calder contention why did no one talk about this before 🤌🤏🫴🫰mo & z FRIENDS? frenemies?? is zegras mentioned by name?? which usntdp u18s were named or was it just mentioned as the entire (gestures towards amoeba in a FUCK OR DIE t-shirt) vague conglomerate Entity™️ that is the usntdp??

#me seeing you in my inbox again: HI BESTIE HOW ARE YOUUUUU #i’m not debating listening to it just for mo i’m not (mo reilly voice: willpower) #but i might google a transcript. or someone’s highlights post of the interview but i want the character information but i hate b*rstool 🤬 #liv in the replies #i’m so. i’m so. ????????????????????????????? babe ur kids leave for one summer & you’re having empty nest syndrome #where did i put. hang on did i post it yet somewhere i had a moment about the couch poem i’ve got to find it i’m out here like i refuse #but also it just lives in my brain now the mold is in the tupperware folks & it’s not coming out hEY DO YOU EVER THINK ABOUT HOW JOE VELENO #IS CANADIAN AND SO IS JAMIE DRYSDALE HOLD ON LET ME GOOGLE SOMETHING #HAND OVER MY MOUTH SCREAMING FLAILING ALICE YOU’RE THE LOVE OF MY LIFE YOUR HOCKEY TEAMMATES WEBSITE IS THE ��🧑‍🍳💋✨ BELOVED BEAUTIFUL PERFECT #S H R I E K I N G i. i typed in joseph veleno because i was like ‘official prospect right like they’d full name him’ & it went ‘ha that #doesn’t exist’ & i’m like oh no have i found the man that this system doesn’t even know?? but we’re not that niche ! joe isn’t !! & tHEN I #TYPE IN JOE & IT POPS UP & JOE&JAMIE PLAYED CANADA U20 ‘22 TOGETHER I CAN SPIN A NARRATIVE HERE SOMEHOW but i just about fell out my chair #i’m not retyping that tag but i mean 2020 which is the year z won gold & jamie was PISSED at him about it & at this point mo & joe had #already been playing together on the griffins & somehow?? z & mo saying hi after the draft running into each other at worlds OH MY GOD THE #FULFILLMENT OF THE NARRATIVE THAT’S THE EPILOGUE THEY HAVE THAT COUCH MOMENT & THEN A YEAR LATER EPILOGUE THEY’RE BOTH IN LOVE WITH BOYS ON #TEAM CANADA STANDING DOWN BY THE GLASS AT THEIR PRACTICE IN THEIR DIFFERENT COLORS JUST LIKE THE DRAFT mo in wings red z in anaheim black #but now mo in germany black z in usa rw&b somehow there’s something there about them reversed colors but idk yet & maybe it’s nothing more #than a nod a hello the gentle knowing of each other in companionable silence z looking up after joe shoots a puck at mo on the glass & z #says ‘that’s yours? your island?’ & mo says yeah & of course trevor hasn’t quite found his yet but there’s a comfort in knowing that someone #else has gone before you someone else made it through & maybe it’s just that jamie catches his eye here & dramatic irony we the reader know #the future here but of course trevor doesn’t mo’s smiling stupid big & z’s watching them skate around gets caught on number 6 (trevor’s no.9 #& somewhere in my brain there’s a thing about reversed tarot cards/flip sides of a mirror/mo & z parallels more like tangent lines but #jamie/z sine waves collapsing idk it’s just brring up there we’ve got mo/z NARRATIVE FOILS OKAY) & of course what z actually says to mo #what he calls joe is a poignant callback to the couch island discussion which i have not written & thus cannot properly state bc. no context #love to fully go off the rails about something unrelated to literally anything & also does not make sense unless you’ve read the post #i’m talking about which i will reblog in one moment see above and/or below i don’t know chronology it’s a poem bUT OH IF I KEEP BABY MO & Z #AS HOCKEY PLAYERS I CAN HAVE DYLAN HAVE A CONVERSATION WITH THEM as the au pair when they’re twelve & do you think everything would be #different if they could’ve known when they were twelve that it was okay for hockey not to be everything to have someone sit them down & tell #them they are loved & good enough & i’m not saying this like it’s bad right now but also i’m thinking about that one post that talked about #how we do not love men & now i am projecting onto au pair dylan who maybe burned out of hockey but takes care of these kids now can take

[psikind]

I beat pokemon scarlet today hi for the love of god hello

#I'm gonna wait to rb spoiler stuff til like next friday and when I do they'll be tagged under 'spoilers' BUT #I Will rb new pokemon designs now tho #still tagged with 'spoilers' but yeah #GENUINELY. GENUINELY HAD AN AMAZING TIME WITH IT HONEST TO GOD IT'S UP THERE WITH BW FOR ME THAT'S A HUGE DEAL #it has so so many graphical/mechanical issues yes I'd write a whole fucking essay about how gf needs to give it's employees- #-better work conditions and more time and pay and Yeah #but oh my god. oh my God oh my fucking god #the pokemon designs are SO inventive and interesting and good the flavor on these lil guys is so peak #THE CHARACTERS ARE SO!!!!! THEY ARE SO I LOVE THE FRIEND GROUP AND TEACHERS AND TEAM STAR AND GYM LEADERS AND YEAH #they way all the story paths and challenges are set up is very intuitive and fun!!!! you don't feel pushed to go a certain order #but if you feel like where you are is too strong then it's easy to gather yourself and figure out what to do #and it almost seems like the leveling accounts for the player wanting to fuck around and find out I did that a Lot #and was only a few levels higher then the final fight by the end #don't even get me started on the story I'm not gonna say shit here but I cried like 5 times and wanted to a few others even still it's so. #god I haven't fallen for a pokemon game this hard in awhile if you don't wanna get it full price please like #get if second hand or watch a cutscene movie at Least and make sure you get one with all the area zero dialogue #I'm sorry for all the tags I'm just. listen special interest became good again in a few aspects I am living #risk.txt #pokemon #also I got 7 shiny pokemon before even beating the game so that's how my infamous luck with that in this game went DSFKVHBFV #the first one I got after only beat the first titan and nothing else! she's a litleo/pyroar named rhea and I love her so much

[sawruhh]

I am really the happiest when I work hard and play hard

#today I woke up and drank my water and went down to the gym to get some sun and just walk on the treadmill for half an hour #I came up and made a lovely breakfast and ate and showered #and then I went out to buy peppercorns and vases and treated myself to brown mascara and some skincare refills #then I came back and arranged all my flowers (alhamdulilah) #and then I started work but then immediately stopped bc anxiety #I took a break and started again #had a call with an alum that not works at a firm I wanna go to #then more work #I made some more dal which has really been hitting the spot #I sent over my draft to the research team and now I’m listening to Valley’s cover of There She Goes and being grateful #like ok it was a full workday today which is quite unusual for me lmao #remember #so happy #oh my GOD okay and my first boss/mentor called me today and ok he’s like nearing 80 and retiring #so he told me about retirement and I told him about graduation and we were just chatting it up like besties #which is hilarious because I remember how scared I was when I met him and started working for him #and now he’s calling me on my cell and chit chatting hehehehe #I mean alhamdulilah #I’m surrounded by love and light and encouragement

[slimeciclecock]

if I wasn't so busy with irl stuff lately I would be cooking SO hard

#anyway stay tuned for my next fic titled take me home i dont wanna be alone tonight (slash JOKE) #fuck i wanna write again so bad #unfortunately i put all my ideas into the first fic and now idk how genuine I'll be if i write a second fic #granted the first fic i wrote was bc i got way too obsessed with mariana hsving that maid dress skin on for weeks #screw it im gonna listen to cross my heart on repeat snd explode #also actually one of my main motivators for the first fic was a mariana trench joke that never made the cut #oh my god wait i know how to link it ☠️☠️ #someone on red team: hey slime where are you we need to do x and x and x #slimecicle: sorry guys cant join you im deep in the mariana trench atm #aight. gonna go fall asleep goodby

[devilishcupid]

CARBON COPY | Miguel O'Hara

☆ premise: trying to find miles morales in earth-42, he encounters you. or at least, a version of you.

☆ pairing: miguel o'hara x fem!alt universe!reader

☆ warnings: across the spiderverse spoilers, pregnant!reader, clueless!reader, angst, hurt no comfort, miguel's pov, some swearing

☆ a/n: oh my god. across the spiderverse is literally a masterpiece. into the spiderverse already is, but the spiderverse team said, "we can do better." they didn't have to, but they did.

"Do you really think this is a good idea?" Jessica asked through the commlink. "This is risky, even by your standards."

"It doesn't matter. The quicker we find Miles, the quicker we get out of here." Miguel muttered into his earpiece as he walked through the busy streets of Earth-42's New York.

"Yes, but blending in? For all we know, a version of us exists here."

"Which is why you need to stop talking and start looking, Jess." Miguel hissed a little too loud, earning looks from a few passerbys. He winced. Jessica had a point. If a version of them did exist in this universe, it would be best not to bring attention to themselves.

"Miguel!"

And... that was now thrown out of the window. Cursing under his breath, he turned around reluctantly to face the person who called him—only to find that it was you.

His eyes widened, and his lips parted at the sight of you. Never in a million years did he expect to see her again. But here you were, the absolute spitting image of her. Your clothes were exactly the same things she would wear, your hair and makeup done the same way.

Finding different versions of people in different universes was not uncommon. There's literally a society uniting the different universes' own Spider-people, for God's sake. But Miguel didn't expect this. He didn't expect a carbon copy of his dead wife on a universe where Spider-Man did not exist.

He should've said he wasn't Miguel, that you were mistaking him for someone else. Hell, he shouldn't have stopped and turned around in the first place. He didn't know what came over him, but in a second, he had his arms wrapped around your body.

"Miguel, hon, are you okay?" You asked, your voice laced with surprise and concern. You had no clue that the man who was hugging you was not your husband. At least, not your husband in this universe.

Miguel grunted in response, his ability to string words together to form a sentence rendered broken by your presence. He squeezed you tighter. He couldn't believe he was holding you in his arms.

You weren't the same woman he fell in love with. He knows this. But he couldn't help himself. You looked exactly like her. Felt exactly like her. Sounded exactly like her. Shit, you even smelled like her.

"Damn it, Miguel, keep it together! She's not your wife!"

Hearing Jess' voice snapped Miguel out of his stupor. Remembering his mission, why he was there in the first place, he pulled away from you. He didn't want to. He wanted to hold you longer. But he knew that if he did, he wouldn't have been able to stop.

"Honey, what's wrong?" You asked, cupping his face in your hands. God, how he missed feeling the warmth of your palms. "You're acting weird."

"I'm fine, sweetheart." He gave you a small smile, his hands wrapping around yours and his lips pressing a kiss on each of your wrists. "I just missed you, that's all."

You laughed. "What are you talking about? You saw me this morning."

Miguel could only chuckle in an attempt to hide his sadness. What was only hours for you was months for him. "Right. I did."

"Are you sure you're okay, though?" You asked again, eyebrows furrowing and the corners of your lips downturned.

"Don't worry about it, darling. I am."

He wasn't. But you didn't need to know that. You didn't need to know that in another universe, the two of you were married. You didn't need to know that you had a daughter together. You didn't need to know that he loved you and your daughter more than life itself, only for him to lose you both.

"Listen, I have to go. I'm having lunch with a friend. But I'll see you later at Doctor Nguyen's, okay?" You placed your hands on your stomach, a smile forming on your face. "I can't wait to see her again."

Miguel swallowed the lump in his throat before forcing himself to smile. Only now he noticed the bump on your stomach, carrying a different Miguel's Gabriella. "Yeah, me too."

With a kiss goodbye on his cheek, you walked away, blissfully unaware that he was not your Miguel. He watched as you disappeared around the corner, knowing it was the first and last time he was ever going to see you again.

But that didn't matter. He'll find Miles. He'll make sure the canon isn't destroyed. He'll make sure another version of himself wouldn't have to suffer the loss of his family the same way he did. He'll make sure you and your kid were safe.

#˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ doll's fics #miguel ohara #miguel o'hara #spider-man #spiderman #across the spiderverse #across the spiderverse spoilers #miguel ohara x reader #miguel o'hara x reader #spiderman x reader #spider-man x reader #spiderman 2099 #spider-man 2099 #spiderman 2099 x reader #spider-man 2099 x reader #oscar isaac #oscar isaac x reader

[sillyblues]

𝐃𝐈𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆 | 𝐦𝐢𝐠𝐮𝐞𝐥 𝐨’𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚 𝐱 𝐠𝐧!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

ੈ✩‧₊˚𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬: miguel tells you how annoying you are

ੈ✩‧₊˚𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐬: last and second part of annoying is here!! thank you so much for the huge support yall broke my app my notifications weren’t loading properly lmao THANK YOU! this was supposed to be just a short one but here we are with a part two and a bit bigger word count m’gonna need rest and need more time for the preggo fic

part 1

Wordlessly, you left the team. You returned to your own Earth and did your own thing again. There was a slight tinge of unfamiliarity, knowing that you might never work with other spider people, your friends, again, but you forced the feeling down.

Miguel’s outburst haunted you wherever you went. Even as you fought villains that disturbed the peacefulness of your home, even as you mingled with the other civilians and hung out with your friends, even as you laid down in the comfort of your bed, his words would constantly echo through your head, and they would threaten the fall of your tears every single time.

If Miguel thought you were annoying, what about your other friends? Do they think you were bothersome as well? Maybe, you bitterly thought as you brought your knees to your face. Maybe the civilians don’t like you as well. The thought of the people you treasure and care for so dearly, the people whom you devoted most of your life to save, the people whom you risk getting hurt every day for, hating you, left you breathless.

More tears fell, and you gasped. The ache in your heart was too much to bear and seemed to sting your entire being. You clutched your chest as you laid sideways on your bed, pillows and blanket long scattered on the floor. You tried to muffle your cries, but it was useless, as they still vibrated through the room of your apartment.

Oh, god. Please don’t hate me. Don’t hate me, please. Don’thatemepleasedon’thatemeplease—

“[Name]?” the familiar voice momentarily halted you in your weeping. You slowly rose a bit, supporting yourself on your arm and looked towards the source of it. Peter’s worried look greeted you as he crawled himself out of your window. 

“Oh, [Name].” you wavered at his heartbroken voice. He immediately rushed in to hug you. He sat on your bed beside you and embraced you. He rocked you back and forth, one hand on the back of your head that leaned into the crook of his neck, and one hand caressed your back.

“P-Peter, I ca– I can’t,” you hiccupped, and with shaking fingers, you gripped his suit tight. You felt your heart would burst with the way it was beating so fast and hard, ringing in your ears. “I can’t— I can’t breathe.”

“It’s okay, [Name]. I got you. I’m here, okay?” his voice was slightly muffled by the top of your head, but you could still hear him. “I want you to listen to me. Stay with me, yeah?”

You tried your best to respond, but it felt like your body wasn’t listening to you. He pulled back a little and held your face in his hands. You look at his eyes full of undisguised concern overflowing, and you desperately hope he doesn’t hate you too. You gathered what was left of your little strength and nodded weakly.

“Can you tell me three things around your room?” you try to look around as you cling to his arms. You looked away from his eyes and looked around you. Your old lampshade provided you with dim lighting in your dark, cold room. Your messy books were in disarray on the table. You saw a mirror. You saw yourself and how miserable you looked. Your face was wet with tears, and your eyes were red. You also saw how Peter looked at you with such solicitude, and you want to cry all over again.

“Um, lampshade.” You said and winced at the painful scratch in your throat and your hoarse voice. “Books. Mirror.”

“Good job. You did well. Can you move three body parts for me?” you unclasped your hands from his arms and tried to clench and unclench them. You wiggled your head out of his hold, embarrassment starting to creep onto you being seen so sticky and so wet and such a mess. It was fortunate that he understood and he chuckled. You were silent for a moment, and you didn't know what else to move so you settled on headbutting Peter.

“Ow! Of all things, really? Can't believe this is what I get,” he grumbled as he rubbed his forehead. You giggled at his exaggerated expression and unknowingly to you, your tears had stopped flowing, and only hiccups remained.

“Are you feeling better, [Name]? You can talk to me, my shoulder is vacant for you. Or do you want me to just stay quiet? Because yeah, I can do either. Just tell me what to do,” you chuckled even more at that. “I’ll even give you a pass for laughing at me.”

Seeing Peter comfort you like that, there was a sense of relief wash over you. It was obvious he was being genuine with you and if he wasn't, he most likely wouldn't even have the patience to sit with you and let you cry on him.

“It's nothing, um, it's just that,” you sighed as you weakly played with your fingers. The words are lodged in your throat, and you slowly breathe out. He looked at you with encouragement to take it slow, to breathe and you did. “I found out people at the headquarters think I talk too much and they didn’t really like me. Then I made Miguel mad, and I learned how I was annoying him. He probably hates me. And, uh, it got me thinking, what if you and Jess and Hobie think the same way? What if everyone thinks the same way?”

There was an urge to cry again, but it felt like you had cried it all out. There was none left for you to cry anymore.

“Wow, I knew Miguel was all bite and no bark, but I didn’t expect he’d bite that deep. What the hell is wrong with him?” the genuine disbelief made you sputter and chuckle. 

“First of all, whoever doesn’t like you is automatically wrong. I mean, who could not like you? You literally make everyone’s day. Jess loves gushing with you about her husband, and Hobie loves talking about how his punk stuff and fighting the literal government which I think it’s really pretty cool of him don’t tell him that he’s going to tell me I should do it as well and I just can’t,” he said. “And I love talking to you because you’re funny and so positive you just know how to make me cheer up. Besides, I’m talking too much now, aren’t I? Always have been. But did you think I was annoying?”

“No! I never once thought you were one.” You replied without a beat.

“Exactly. Us either. Look, [Name], everyone loves you. Trust me when I say that.” He said with confidence and finality that you had no choice but to believe him,

“But, Miguel..”

“He's stupid. I know. Don’t mind what he said because it’s all bullshit anyways.” He grins. “Lyla told me what happened. I’m not taking his side because what he said is just wrong and I get you, you know? Having to hear all of that hurts. But from the bottom of my heart, I think Miguel did not mean what he said. Like, all the pent-up stress got to his head and boom, it suddenly burst out. I’m not saying that it was a valid reason, no. I just wanted to let you know that he doesn’t truly think you’re annoying, you know?”

“Besides, from all the time I knew him, I had never seen him genuinely enjoy his time with someone nor mope so bad when you didn’t come to the headquarters anymore.” He said with a deadpan expression at the end.

“Pfft, really?”

“Yes, really.”

There was a pause, it wasn’t awkward but it made you appreciate him more for coming here for you. He smiled at you and you did too, leaning on his shoulder for support. He hugged you sideways, one arm rubbing the side of your arm and you closed your eyes.

“I missed you, [Name]. We all did.”

“...I missed you all too.”

.

.

.

The decision to come back to the headquarters was a bit hard but you took it slow with Peter’s support. He never rushed you nor forced you to come back which you really appreciated and when you did return, you were sure you didn’t regret it. Jess and Hobie immediately latched onto you, they hugged you tight and told you how much they missed you so bad. They asked you how had you been, if you were alright, if were you hurt, and all that. Seeing their sincere worry for you, you smiled hard enough to hurt your cheeks and slowly you were going back to the old, happy you.

What changed right now was that you avoided Miguel. When you first returned to the headquarters, Miguel was there a bit far away from you. You could feel his earnest gaze at you and you looked at him briefly. The bags underneath his eyes seemed to be bigger and you wonder if he had gotten a bit bigger too. A reminder of his words rang instantly through your head and you breathed deeply silently. You quickly looked away as soon as you laid your eyes on him and that remained true for a couple of weeks.

During the briefing of your missions, he would look at you expectantly as if you would stand beside him like you always did. But you usually stood nearby Hobie who was at the entrance of his office. Sometimes you stood beside Jess and Peter which was a bit near him but not quite so.

“You’re not gonna be near him?” Hobie once asked as he lay down on a flat surface. He nudged his head in Miguel’s direction who was looking at you a couple of times as he talked about the mission details. You smiled bitterly. 

“Aight, guess I got more time to catch up with you, huh?” the tip of his lips lifted up, “Wanna leg it and come join the protest in my home?”

“Oh no.” you silently snorted.

“What? It’s fun and we’re doing the right thing, you know.”

“Hobie, are you listening?” Miguel’s voice interrupted you both. You look away, not yet keen on looking at him.

“Yes, big boss. Ears open for you, don’t worry about me,” he stretched his arms before he folded them to lay his head on his clasped fingers. You wondered why he hadn’t called you when you weren’t really listening to him as well. Maybe he targeted Hobie on purpose to make you feel uncomfortable? You bit your lip. No, that can’t be. Peter said Miguel didn’t hate you and you trusted him so despite the voices haunting voices once more, you decided to believe in him.

Sometimes, you two would meet outside the building on his favourite Mexican stand outside the building. Maybe it was a habit formed over the time you knew him that you would buy him his empanadas. Now that you couldn’t bring yourself to talk to him just yet, you bought some for yourself. You could not deny that you missed buying his food, only to eat half of it yourself.

“Ah, it’s [Name]! How have you been? I haven’t seen you in so long!” Mrs. Flores exclaimed as soon as she saw your walking figure towards her. You two have gotten close a bit back then and has since then insisted you to call her ‘Abuela’. “Have you lost weight? You’ve gotten smaller since I last saw you!”

You didn’t think you did but before you could deny she was immediately cooking some empanadas, “Just wait, I’ll cook some for you, okay? No need to pay.”

“Abuela, thank you, but I can’t accept this without payment. Please, let me pay,” you opened your wallet and took some money but she wasn’t having it.

“No! I told you I don’t need any money! Do I look like I need some, huh? Don’t make me angry,” she threateningly pointed her clamps at you. You just sighed, knowing full well that her stubbornness was stronger than any villain you had fought. Suddenly, a figure crept behind you and you paid it no mind, figuring it was some other customer but the voice surprised you.

“Buenas tardes, Señora. Lo de siempre por favor.” You looked at Miguel in reflex. He wore a plain white shirt and trousers and oh, he was so close to you. His mouth opened as if he wanted to say something but hesitation dripped from him so you took the opportunity to look away and stepped to your side to create some distance between you.

“Oh, ¿es tú novio, [Name]? ¡Lo sabía! Why didn’t you say so? He’s been the one buying empanadas instead when you were gone.” You choked on your own saliva and embarrassment immediately crept up your cheeks. You coughed it out as she side-eyed you. Miguel was silent and you wonder if he wasn’t going to clear this misunderstanding up.

“You had a fight, didn’t you?”

“No, Abuela, he’s not my boyfriend—”

“He isn’t? ¡Qué hombre más estúpido! Are your eyes not properly working? What are you still waiting for?” she snorted at him. The bubbling noises from the oil fill the silence as you didn’t really know how to respond in this situation. 

“Well whatever, you will fix it, won’t you?” she glared at him. In that moment, you felt loved once more and you were starting to truly believe that those who said you were annoying were wrong. You bit your lip. You did not deny to yourself that you were expecting to hear his answer.

“I will.” He replied with such determination and resolution as he looked at you. Your heart throbbed, you saw how much he wanted to fix things right with you and you didn’t know how to feel. Glad? Happy? But you also felt upset at yourself because you almost wanted to smile just because of that and it felt like you were too easy in forgiving him even though he hurt you so much. You quickly dismissed the confusing feelings down and when Abuela gave you the empanadas, you hurriedly slipped some bills while you took the food and almost ran off.

But everything would have to come to an end, including this avoidance of yours of him. You sorted out your thoughts, and your feelings, each day as you avoided him like a plague after numerous encounters because you feared that if you saw him one more time, you would burst out and say things that you didn’t mean like he did. 

On the day that you decided to finally stop everything and just talk to him, you were beaten to it by Miguel. You were looking through the windows in the building and stared at the beautiful blue skies and the white clouds that decorated it. The flying cars and the mega train running vertically were like the birds and the beam of sunlight back in your home and you were reminded of the differences you and Miguel had. 

“[Name],” his voice was so soft, so unlike the tone he had the day he yelled at you. You admit you had gotten comfortable with the pain you felt since that day that you still wanted to evade his gazes and attempts to reach out to you. But the rational part of you, the one that grew from the pain, knew you had to meet his eyes this time. To let him reach you this time. And so you did. You looked at him, you looked at his eyes that were looking at you so desperately, so hesitatingly.

“Can we talk, please? Just the two of us,” he said but to you, it felt like he pleaded with the way his eyebrows furrowed and his jaw was clenched, awaiting your words that seemed like it would decide his fate.

“Okay,” you breathed out and he did too. The crease on his forehead slowly thinned out and his shoulders moved back. You knew that if someone different saw Miguel like this, they would think he was normal and that he wasn’t acting differently. But you knew better. Despite the tough shell he portrayed, there was a man vulnerable just like you. You just had a soft shell.

You two went to his office and the door closed behind you two. He asked Lyla to not let anyone enter for at least a while so nobody would disturb you both. She saw you and waved brightly at you. She then nodded and finally disappeared.

“Before you say anything, can you honestly answer this one question I have? Just one, please,” you asked him, nerves started to creep onto you and you wanted to look away so bad but you have to search for the truth in his eyes. You have to know his answer to your question.

“Sure, yes. I’ll be honest, I swear.” He promised you.

“Did you ever really think I was annoying? That all I do was nothing but cause trouble for you?”

“Never.” 

“Liar.” You were disappointed. You were not as stupid and oblivious as others thought of you. There was a part of yourself that knew that you were bothering them. That you were bothering him. But you couldn’t help it. You cared for him and if talking too much, if bothering him would make him distracted from the grief and the pain he had from Gabriella then you would gladly do it.

“No, I wasn’t lying, [Name]—” you looked away. He couldn’t even be honest with you. Were you that unworthy of honesty? That was all you had asked. You clenched your fist and let your nails dig into your palm. “Listen to me, please.”

You start to walk away.

“[Name], por favor,”

You were nearing the exit.

“I— fuck it, yes! I didn’t like you because you were so annoying. I hated you.” You immediately looked back at him. Disbelief was obvious in your face and tears fell from your eyes. You felt a sense of betrayal at this. If he hated me so much, then why did he let me so close to him? Were you just a show to him? Were you entertaining? He was approaching you and strength had left your legs from the shock at what he said but you remained still.

“I hated the way you talked so much I felt like I was losing a part of myself because I wanted to know more about you and listen to you talk. I hated the way you know so much about me. I felt like you could see through me and I was so scared that you would hate me if you knew what I truly am. I hated the way you cared for me like no other because I cared for you too and I was so terrified to lose you too. I hated the way you’re so reckless, you don’t care if you get hurt as long as it’s for others.” He stopped in front of you and tears were also coming out from his eyes. “I hated the way you captured my whole attention whenever you’re there by my side because I can’t look at anything else anymore. I can’t work properly anymore. I can’t think properly anymore and– and I, oh fuck.”

What?

“You’re so annoying because you distract me so much. I hated you because I fell for you and you’re all I could think about and I just don’t know anymore,” he shakily breathed out. His figure was so big but at this moment, you felt like he was so small. His tears ran continuously like a furious stream and you were sure yours were too.

“When you left, it didn’t feel right anymore. I missed you talking to me. I missed you eating my food. I missed you annoying me. I missed you so much it hurts.” His voice turned hoarse and you finally moved. You caressed your hand on his cheeks and he leaned his face against your touch. “Lo siento, [Name]. I really am. Es la verdad, por favor créeme. Por favor…”

“Are you stupid? Why didn’t you tell me?” you cried out as you wrapped your arms around his neck and hugged him tight. But you couldn’t really blame him. Because he was the same as you. Despite his flying cars and vertical running train and your birds and beam of sunlight, there was still the same blue sky and white clouds. Despite his tough shell and your soft one, you two were just as vulnerable as the other.

“I’m sorry, don’t hate me please…” he croaked out and gripped onto your suit tight. You leaned back a bit to hold his face in your palms. His face was wet, his hair was a mess, and he looked so haggard. You lean your forehead against his.

“I don’t, I promise. I could never hate you and I hate you for it as well,” you giggled amidst your tears. 

Really, he was such a stupid man and you were so annoying.

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#blue writes! ✧˖*°࿐ #spiderverse 2 #across the spiderverse #spider man: across the spider verse #spiderman 2099 #atsv miguel #miguel o'hara #miguel o'hara x reader #atsv angst