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i love you, will you marry me?



You were numb.

You couldn’t feel or hear anything.

You knew the Colossal Titans stormed on toward you and the members of whoever was left of the Survey Corps; how could you not? You just couldn’t comprehend this moment. 

Here, where your love said her final goodbyes.

Your throat burned and you could feel your damn brain pulsing against your skull as she spoke. You clenched your fists tightly, drawing blood in your fists.

You noticed one thing.

Why wouldn’t she look at you?

You swallowed thickly, forcing yourself to wipe the tears from your red eyes.

Hanji-” You began. Your voice had turned coarse.

“Goodbye everyone,” Hanji said, speaking over you. She seemed to be strangely satisfied with her fate. Her farewell was a stark contrast to the horrified expressions around her. 

Hanji’s eyes floated among everyone in the group; Levi, Jean, Armin, Connie, Mikasa, Annie and Reiner.

But she wouldn’t even glance at you. 

You; the one who’d been by her side long enough that losing her would mean losing a great part of your soul.

Confusion mixed with anger bubbled in your chest.

“Hanji-” You began again, louder this time, only to be ignored again.

“Levi is now your subordinate,” Hanji announced to the youngers, with her back turned to you, in something like a joking tone. “So feel free to boss him around as you wish.”

Your face darkened. Fresh tears ran down your cheeks as your fists subconsciously clenched again. Levi noticed your blatant irritation, pursing his lips tightly.

Why was she doing this? Why was she ignoring you? 

Would she truly leave you alone without saying goodbye?

Without a word, you narrowed your teary eyes and marched behind Hanji. You roughly grabbed your love’s arm. “Hanji,” This time, your voice cracked horribly and you let your tears flow freely. “Hanji, I know you hear me.”

A moment passed before Hanji sighed quietly.

The brunette turned to face you. Your expression softened immediately. Hanji’s beautiful brown eyes were equally as anguished and tearful as yours, if not then more. Her entire face was red, and her olive cheeks were soaked with tears.


On this day, 6 Years into the Past


What the hell? 

Your eyes twitched, but you kept them closed.


Is that Hanji?

You groaned a little, lazily flopping your arm in the direction of all the chaos.

Hanji crossed her arms and pouted. “Why. Won’t. You. Wake. Up,” Hanji poked your face with a pen, emphasizing every word she murmured. Much to her surprise, you actually responded back this time.

“Maybe because you’re screaming in my ears.”

Sure, your response was sarcastic and barely audible due to your face being pressed into a pillow, but it was still something.

Hanji smiled brightly. “Oh, so you were awake,”

You groggily sat up and rubbed your eyes, which were still growing acquainted to the bright morning light. “I suppose so,” You mumbled, yawning. Hanji noticed the tone of slight irritation in your voice. After all, she did tear you away from sleep. Very loudly, at that.

Before you could process it, Hanji, in her spirited nature, grabbed your face with both hands and pressed a quick peck to your lips.

“Good morning, my love.” 

Her beautiful smile shone brighter than the sun abusing your poor eyes.

Your face softened, and soon you found yourself giggling. You decided to let go of your little grudge.

“Good morning, beautiful.”


The day had gone on as usual. You’d spent your days in the military assisting your love in her lab, which you could only describe as a dream job. Every day was a new adventure with Hanji, and you would never have it any other way. Lately, Hanji had been cooped up in her lab for longer periods of time; forgetting to eat, drink, and sometimes even forgetting to sleep. Luckily she had you, her assistant and her lover, to make sure she was properly taken care of.

As the day neared its end, you walked through the hallway leading up to Hanji’s door, balancing a full plate of food in one hand, and a cup of hot tea in the other. 

“Hanji,” You called. “Open up.”


A deafening yell and a number of crashes and thuds boomed as your response.

You flinched so hard that you almost dropped everything in your grasp.

What in God’s name just happened in there?

“H-Hanji?” You said again.

 No response.

Your eyebrows furrowed in concern. “Hanji, I’m coming in now.”

“N-No!” Hanji’s muffled voice hollered. “Don’t come in here!”

“Yeah, why not?” You asked. “I brought you food.”

“Really? I can only imagine where I’d be without you,” She gushed, then paused. “B-But still! Don’t come in here!”

You rolled your eyes. Whatever she was worried about couldn’t have been that bad. You’ve seen it all when it comes to your wacky genius. “I’m coming in now.” You ignored her protests and turned the doorknob handle.

You swung open the mahogany door, setting the food down on the nearest table. You scanned the room. Hanji’s lab was overall in order, but her desk was a nightmare. Papers were sprawled along the floor, empty cups were broken and Hanji stared at you with a nervous smile. Her hands were hidden behind her back.

You’ve got to be kidding me.

“Hanji,” You sang, slowly walking toward her. “What’s behind your back?”

Hanji stepped back with every step you took forward.

She gulped. “I.. Well, you..”

 You could see her eyes shooting back and forth between you and the open door behind you both. 

Oh no, you don’t-

Hanji launches herself toward the door, cackling wildly. “If you want to see it, I suppose you’ll have to chase me!” 

You found yourself smiling to yourself at the laughing fool. You ran after your crazy woman with the same reckless abandon.

You two passed your subordinates, as well as Captain Levi and Commander Erwin who looked at you two with complete confusion written into their faces.

“I don’t even want to know,” Erwin sipped his tea. Levi shook his head. “The less time we spend trying to understand those two, the more time we get to function.” And the two went back to talking about whatever they were talking about.

You and Hanji found yourselves running the streets of the town under the blanket of the night sky. Internally you thanked whoever heard you that you were in such good shape from even being in the military; you’d chased her a pretty far distance before you felt yourself starting to become exhausted.

“Hanji,” You huffed, slowing down. 

“What is it,” You heard Hanji tease. She was starting to slow down too, but she made sure she was out of your reach. “Running out of breath already?” 

“Just tell me what’s in your hand!”

With no response, Hanji turned a sharp corner. You groaned to yourself and decided to stop chasing her. You were sweating like hell, and you were huffing and puffing like a crazy person. You were sure you looked like one, too. You rested your hands on your knees, and looked around for somewhere to rest. Your eyes fell upon a spare wooden box in a dark, crooked alleyway. It wasn’t the prettiest-in fact it was a little creepy- but you only wanted to sit and catch your breath for a moment.

You sat on the box and rested your back on the brick wall, feeling yourself become wearier as time went on. Your eyes began to slowly close when-

“Y/N,” A velvety voice called above you. 

A warm cloak fell lightly upon your resting shoulders. You opened your E/C eyes and saw the soft grin of your love herself.

Hanji sat next to you and pulled your tired head onto her shoulders. “I was looking for you everywhere.”

“Was I out for that long?” You mumbled tiredly, inhaling her sweet, intense scent. You closed your eyes once more, but you weren’t asleep.

“No,” Hanji hummed. “But you were gone long enough to make me think.”

You remained silent, listening to her soft words.

“You’re still wondering I was holding in my hand, aren’t you?” Hanji brushed your hair with her fingers. You nodded.

“It’s a.. Well..” She fumbled over her words, and began to play with her hands. You peered up to see her face heating up.

You were confused. What could it have been? Then you wondered if you were pressing her too much.

“Hanji, its okay,” You started. “You don’t have to tell-”

Hanji cleared her throat. 

“I’ll put it plainly, its a ring.”

.  .  .

A ring?

Your lips parted ever so slightly. Your eyes were wide. “A ring?” You repeated your thoughts. “Hanji, does this mean you want to-”

“Yes,” Hanji was beaming now, but not at you. She had her starry eyes in the sky, while her arm pulled you close.

“Truth be told, want to spend the rest of my life with you,” Hanji began whimsically. “I’ve been working on making it for you for a while now.”

Suddenly it all made sense to you. The sleepless nights, the skipping meals. 

Had it had all been for you?

Your eyes filled with warm tears. Hanji’s delicate fingers lightly brushed them away.

“I want to show it to you,” She revealed a cloth in her palms, in the outline of a finger band. “But I can’t. At least right now I can’t.”

“Why is that?” You asked.

She turned to face you, wonder in her brown eyes. “I want to wait until the world is ours,” She exclaimed.

“When the titans are gone and remembered as societies nightmare, we can live together as a bickering old couple. I want to marry you so, so badly Y/N, but I want to do it right. I want to do it when this world is at peace. I want to die knowing I’m married to Y/N L/N.

She grasped your hands tenderly within her own. Hanji stared into your emotional E/C eyes, with her own beautiful brown ones.

“What do you say, Y/N? Would you marry me?”


Present Day


Hanji swallowed the bile that burned the back of her throat. She tried so hard to avoid looking directly into your pained expression. Hanji absolutely hated hurting you like this.

As much as she wanted these final moments to last, she felt the rumble of titans approaching.

 She had to make this quick, and she hated it.


Hanji breathed shakily. With a quivering hand, she reached into her dark green cloak, watching as your red eyes trailed her every move.

“I hope that someday,” She inhaled sharply. “Someday, you can forgive me for what I’m about to do,”

Hanji’s fate was sealed, yet she kept that damn smile on her face as she spoke. Your heart pounded in your ears as Hanji finally approached you. She grasped both of your hands in hers, just like she’d done on that day.

“Y/N L/N,” She announced.

“I love you. Will you marry me?”

Your eyes widened. Your mouth fell slightly agape. 

No… This isn’t how it was supposed to happen…

You nodded, as if you were entranced. “Yes,” You mumbled breathily.

Hanji’s grin only spread across her whole face as she pulled you into a tight embrace. Hanji nuzzled her face into your neck. She was wetting it with tears, but you didn’t care. You tried so hard to take in and remember as much of her scent in as you could. You knew you would never smell it again.

“Thank you,” Her small voice whispered into your ear. “Thank you for everything.”

Soon, Hanji pulled away, but not before leaving a small peck atop of your lips.

And even as you screamed and cried and begged Hanji not to go,

even as Jean held you back from chasing your crazy scientist into the death mission,

Hanji smiled to herself as the world of Titans around her began to fade.

She’d finally gotten to do what she’d always wanted to.


You hadn’t even realized your palm was still closed from when Hanji had held you. You felt something cold within your fist. Cracking open your hands, your eyes brimmed, and your throat knotted at what you had saw.

A silver and gold ring.


this is my first story in a while :))) i hope you enjoyedd- nila

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“Maybe we could go to Reiner’s house?”

That’s what Bertholdt suggested with a timid voice when he and his friends got surprised by the sudden downpour. The park was now covered with a white curtain of cold drops and the tree they all huddled under struggled to protect them from the rain.  

Bertholdt would have gladly sheltered them at his studio since he didn’t live that far from the park. But his place was too cramped to welcome such a group. Marcel and Porco’s house would have been a better plan if only it hadn’t been located on the other side of the city. As for the girls, Pieck was from the neighboring town and Annie’s flat mate refused to let the Galliard brothers in since… the last time.

Now, the Braun’s house was close, spacious and empty at this hour, save for Reiner, his boyfriend, who’d surely open the door for them. It was obviously their best option at the moment and Bertholdt felt relief when the others promptly agreed to his suggestion. Soaked like they were, they didn’t need much convincing, anyway.

Read the full story on AO3

My MRB fic is finally done! Lot of reibert, lot of flirty Marcel, a little hint of trans!Porco, Ace!Annie, Nb!Bertholdt but also pikuani, marurai and maruberu. And a dog! Thank you @whiteasy for encouraging me, and thank you @wanderingtycho for editing! <3

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A Brief History Of My Musical Theater Days

let’s revisit my shadowed musical theater past, shall we? all jokes aside, although i don’t perform in musicals these days and instead: write them, i had a blast doing this!

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