#Anti took advice from the wrong person

[just-antithings]

Anti-ism is psuedoscience and a moral panic rolled into one

One of the most dangerous things about therapyspeak leaving the intended audience is that now antis feel fully qualified to tell survivors how they should and should not be coping, even to the point of attempting to override/contradict the advice of certified therapists.

I've had antis tell me the fiction I enjoy writing is retraumatizing myself, that I am doing harm by writing it; when I responded that actually, my therapist signed off on the stories I wrote (even when I mentioned the specific phrase "consensual nonconsent"), they said that my therapist doesn't know what she's talking about since she sanctioned my coping mechanism and explicitly labels her practice as kink-positive. Antis are attempting to make me, a survivor with mental illness that could ultimately be fatal if I leave a psychologist's care, disregard the advice of the medical professional supervising me when they have no certification at all. This could, if I were a more vulnerable person, be dangerous for not only my trust in my therapist, but it could sabotage my treatment as well.

They are using what amounts to little more than memes, based on misinformation, that use a few intelligent-sounding phrases that very rarely apply the way they think they do, as a wedge to attempt to assert themselves as authorities who can, with certainty, dictate the appropriate course of treatment for a total stranger, including telling them to disregard the therapies administered by a trained professional.

In other words? Antis are frighteningly similar to anti-vaxxers, who took medical terminology they didn't understand, applied it to shaky cause-effect logic models, started a moral panic, used statements generated by that moral panic as a citogenesis-fueled proof their initial starting of the moral panic was justified, damaged the doctor-patient relationship of millions of total strangers, jeopardized the healthcare of those strangers who now believed their doctor to be incompetent for following accepted medical best practice, and fomented dangerous fringe political ideologies that coupled themselves to other conspiracies based on rejecting commonly-acknowledged practices.

"Vaccines cause autism! Narrative therapy that implements any form of controversial kink causes retraumatization of the writer, reader, or both, and starts the writer on an inescapable slippery slope to becoming an abuser themself! It's better to be dead than autistic! It's better to suffer feelings of shame and/or isolation in silence than it is to use fiction to put a voice to your feelings! Your child is vaccine-damaged from thimerosal and is getting sick from virus-shedding! Your fiction caused me to groom myself and you're a porn-addicted monster for not facing your trauma the proper way! Your doctor doesn't know what's good for you, I do! Only I understand how your body/mind work and what treatment is appropriate for you! Your doctor has been manipulated by Big Pharma/kink supporters! The empirical-study-informed best practices for pediatrics/psychology are what's wrong, not me, whose research is carefully informed by TikTok videos and Twitter posts carefully formulated to cause amygdalar growth to keep me afraid so I will continue to engage with fear-mongering content that causes my politics to shift towards the alt-right, who coincidentally also push narratives based in fear, not in medicine! I am being perfectly logical here!"

Antis fundamentally reject empirical medicine just the way anti-vaxxers do. They just seem to get a free pass on it since it's "only" mental healthcare they are sabotaging, and few people acknowledge it as something as legitimate and lifesaving as other medical care.

#submission #just anti things

[flamingpudding]

Fictober23 Prompt: 5 - "You're the smartest person I know."

Fandom: DPxDC

Rating: T

Warnings: Mensions of Blood, Injury and Violence

A/N: This is kind of a bad timeline kind of situation that plays into the Gamer Pal Prompt I wrote before but can still be read independently.

Danny gasped as he staggered along the alley wall, with no idea where he was. He leaned with his shoulder against the wall as his left hand pressed against the wound on his stomach that refused to stop bleeding. He was confused, dizzy and pretty sure his father had given him a concussion, so closing his eyes and just sleeping on the side of the street was out of the question.

Tucker had thrown him through a portal Wulf had opened and that portal had spit him out here in… he doesn't recognise anything. But he was pretty sure he wasn't in Amity anymore. His vision was blurry but he was pretty sure that there were skyscrapers or at least buildings way taller than he was used to.

"Fuck." Danny cursed as another wave of pain made his body shudder. If he could just transform than maybe these injuries wouldn't be as bad but next to the pain Danny could also feel electricity surging through his body thanks to whatever Vlad zapped him with that stopped his transformation.

He coughed, squinting his eyes at the red spots that splattered to the ground. Things had gone to shit and real quickly and for a moment Danny thought that maybe they should have listened to their Gaming friend. Listened to his words of caution and advice to find a way to leave or to have at least a couple more of back up plans if things go horribly wrong.

Well it all came back to bite Danny like usually, as he spat out another glob of blood. Maybe Tim hadn't been as paranoid as they had assumed.

"You okay there kid?"

Danny needed to blink a couple of times until the red and brown blob before him finally took the shape of a person. He blinked several times more until his brain also finally caught up with who he was seeing before him.

"You're Red Hood?" Danny somehow managed to say in between coughing again. Tim had told them about Gothams vigilantes and how he could contact them to get them to help with Amity. To get them into contact with the Justice League. They had thanked him but refused the help, citing the fact that even one overshadowed hero could spell even worse trouble than they already had.

Now he felt stupid having refused that kind of help.

"Hey there kid." Don't black out now. Your bleeding pretty heavily we should get you to a doctors and-"

"No hospitals." Danny cut the vigilante off, coughing once more. Even though Tim somehow had managed to get the Justice League started on the removal of the Anti-Ecto Acts they were not yet gone. He couldn't risk that yet.

But meeting Red Hood meant that Danny was in Gotham, which meant he could probably go directly to Tim for help. His Gaming Pal did say that he knew his cities vigilantes personally.

"Okay no hospitals then." Hood confirmed for him as the man reached out to Danny just as he lost his balance falling forward. The last thing Danny remembers was muttering something along the lines of "Tim… I need to find him."

The next thing Danny then became aware of was the soft beeping of a heart monitor and loud arguing not too far from him. He groaned audible and the arguing stopped instantly. A wight rested on his shoulder and Danny blinked through the brightness and blurreyness once more until he vaguely recognised the shape of a person he so far had only seen through video chats.

"Tim?"

"You absolute idiot." Was the response he got and yea that definitely was the voice he had heard so often during all the late night Doomed gaming sessions.

"That checks out. You are the smartest person I know." Danny chuckled lightly until a sharp pain made him gasp. "Shit, I will feel that for weeks."

"The smartest person you know is Sam. Between the four of us she has the best grades, remember? Besides that, do you have any idea what kind of panic you and Tuck send us through?"

Danny peaked at Tim and grimaced at the frustrated glare the other teen was sending him. "Tucker was the one throwing me through a portal."

"You're lucky you landed in Gotham." The other then muttered, shaking his head.

"Again. You are the smartest person I know. You would have figured out some way to track me? Like the time you hacked our phones and tuned in onto Desiree's ectosignature to find her. Works better than the Booomerang that keeps hitting my head."

"That's because that thing is only tuned on you."

"And you somehow got rid of the GIW and I still haven't figured out how you did that."

Danny watched how the other teen shrugged. There was a silence between them. Tim was texting on his phone, probably informing Sam and Tucker. Danny, meanwhile, for the first time took notice that he was in some sort of medical bay, also noting that whoever Tim had argued with had already left. If he could believe Red Hood's words, then even if this looked like a hospital room it was not one.

"Hey Tim?" Danny finally broke the silence and the other teen only hummed. "Is your offer to stay with you in Gotham and to go to school and college here still open? I think I am ready to leave Amity behind now."

Tim looked up from his phone at Danny and gave him a feral grin. "About damn time. I had all the papers ready for you for ages now. It's about time we finally make use of them."

Danny chuckled. "And you still don't believe me when I say, that you are the smartest person I know?"

"Anyone in my family can do at least that, you know? These papers are nothing special."

Danny only raised an eyebrow at the other before both teens started to laugh, with one laugh getting cut short by a groan of pain and the other by fussing over the other right after it.

#fictober23 #danny fenton #danny phantom #dpxdc #dp x dc #Tim drake #jason todd #dcxdp #fanfic #Gaming pal #Danny needed saving #shit when down in amity #Danny escaped to Gotham with injuries #Red Hood found him #Tim and Sam were Panicked #they didn't know that tucker and wulf threw danny into a portal #Tim ended up arguing with his brother about how to best keep Danny save #Tim was prepared #Danny just needed to agree with him #unedited #no beta we die like danny #added tags after posting because I forgot some... sorry

[a-sip-of-milo]

What I find fucking hilarious is that people think I've been a blind supporter of personality disorders my entire life. They don't know that for years, I believed in narcissistic/borderline abuse. I believed all anti-socials were scary. I used psychopath/sociopath/narcissist as insults. I was even in Facebook groups that supported survivors of "narcissistic abuse".

After growing up surrounded by people who believed in these things, why wouldn't I believe them, too?

When I was fourteen, I began doing research on what it meant to be a narcissist. I had incredibly ableist intentions while doing so, and I went through weeks of anti-narcissist stuff before stumbling across blogs similar to this one on Tumblr. (yes. it took tumblr to change my mind, which shows you just how bad things are.)

From there, I began to drip feed myself information on NPD, occasionally scrolling through the NPD tag and checking out blogs that held the very beliefs I hated. I never interacted with them, but was interested in figuring out why there was so much positivity for something I deemed so wrong.

So, it wasn't even that I was "brainwashed" into believing these things. I did extensive research from both angles and even had discussions with my grandmother about it, who since then has also done a heap of self-education.

This is why I can't help but laugh when people tell me I'm uneducated on the subject, or that I need to do more research instead of blindly following along with whatever the people around me say. I'd say the closest I ever got to following that advice made me realise just how wrong I was about so much.

And now I'm diagnosed with BPD, which only further proves their point that not everyone was cluster b personality disorders are bad:)

#tw ableism #npd safe #aspd safe #bpd safe #hpd safe #cluster b safe #personality disorders #actually borderline #actually bpd #actually mentally ill #narcissistic abuse #narc abuse #anti npd #cluster b

[beesmygod]

hiveworks:

-ignored me when i tried to warn them about kinomatika, a serial scam artist, and more or less affirming that their abuse toward me (which i did not detail or disclose to them, i focused on the financial facts) was monetarily justified

-used me as an unpaid consultant for 7 years, including picking out the CEO's outfits, website design, and advice. all unpaid.

-disclosed to me the personal lives and habits of other comic artists despite me literally never asking. if youve ever done anything unflattering in front of xel, then i heard about it. for some reason

-tried to repeatedly impress me or....something by constantly sending me updates about their lastest frivolous purchases or big financial deal or total revenue i would mysteriously never see the results of even in the form of trying to improve hive itself

-desperately wants to be thought of as a leftist collective despite their reliance on advertising and financial focus. they are not a collective or community. its an advertising agency with perks, if youre already making money

-had to be begged to have my website added in a timely manner after i was accepted and was at the bottom of the "to-do" pile from that point on. refused to work with me when flash was becoming depreciated. i wanted to either change it to html5 or, barring that, replace the flash video with a youtube embed. for some reason they refused to do this. now that have access to my backend again i can do it myself in like a few minutes lol.

-right before i left, they nuked the group/official discord and started imposing incredibly stupid rules bc adults were having too many emotions where they could see it

-are objectively wrong about piracy and the preservation of digital media, taking a firm "anti" stance until they realized it was morally unpopular. this extends to the members, who chronically petrified at the actually delusional belief that people are pirating them to such a degree that it causes a financial deficit

-the way they talk about their audiences is putrid. like theyre constantly angry at the attention and praise they've gone out of their way to cultivate. a common refrain was "you dont owe your audience anything" which is literally and demonstrably not true lol.

-barely paid me 100 dollars a month for this

toward the end of my run, other artists started bitching that i was making hive look bad "because it reflects back on them" so i left. upon realizing and being told i was representing the company that treated me like this, i was offered an out and took it. as a gift to them, primarily.

bad company. didnt like it.

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

hello sex witch! this may or may not be something you can answer, but I was wondering if you had any advice on kind of disentangling the emotional aspect to sex? I’ve only slept with one person, and tbh I really psyched myself out bc I didn’t want to be the stereotype who gets way too obsessed with the person who took their virginity. I’ve never felt comfy doing casual sex to get more experience and a lot of that hang up is mental, and my friends advice has always been to meet guys on apps until something clicks, which to be fair I haven’t tried but idk. it seems like the wrong order of operations? like I need to sort out my emotional shit before dragging other people into it, even if I never see them again. it’s also not like an anti sex positive thing, I know Logically casual sex is fun and normal I just can’t seem to untie all that. I hope this was coherent lol, thank you so much for answering questions on this, it’s very helpful to have an objective take!

hi anon,

I think a crucial addition to everything you just said is the almighty "for some people." for instance, "casual sex is fun and normal... for some people." this isn't to suggest that sex between people who aren't in a committed romantic relationship is ever abnormal, of course, only that everyone's individual norms are different. frisbee golf is fun and normal, but that doesn't mean I personally get anything out of it. keep your frisbee away from me.

if casual sex isn't comfortable to you (a thing that you said, I'm not putting any words in your mouth) just. don't do that.

it's fine to save sex for a relationship where you're a little more attached. wanting a more substantial relationship with your sexual partner(s) doesn't make you obsessive, and it doesn't make you sex negative; sex negativity is what happens when you want everyone to have sex exactly the way you do and make up justifications about why the other ways are amoral and dangerous. what you have is, like, a preference, and an extremely harmless one at that.

you've made some allusions here to having some "emotional shit" to sort out before having sex with someone else. if you're referring to your disinterest in casual sex, that's not actually a problem. if there's a different flavor of emotional baggage that you feel would make you poorly positioned to be a responsible sexual partner then sure, by all means work on that first and good on you for recognizing it. but if the entirety of this perceived issue is that you'd rather go out a bit first and get to know someone before you have sex with them, that's nothing. that's something easily resolved by just talking to prospective partners about exactly what flavor of relationship they're seeking to make sure your goals align.

I prescribe you this chill pill, to be taken immediately, and assure you there's nothing about what you're doing that sounds like it needs to change.

#sex edventures 2024

[theswiftheartsystem]

(New!) The Swift Heart System Introduction💙

cw: syscourse, and general discourse.

Basic Information:

Collective Name: Refer to us as Swift Heart if not sure!

Collective Pronouns: They/Them, or Ask!

Collective Gender: Pangender, GenderFluid, and genders along that spectrum are all okay with us 👍

We are white, afab and American, keep in mind our perspective is based around our personal experience, and what we have learned about.

Alter Count at the moment: Around 400, but we are aware it’s more, we don’t really care much about alter count all things considered lol.

Host: As of now, none! Even when we have one it isn’t very long!

Origin: Traumagenic

Disorders that we have: DID (what this blog is mainly about), BPD, Autism, C-PTSD, GAD, and possibly OCD (although we would lie to discuss it with a therapist/psychiatrist beforehand for personal comfort!)

Extra: We are Pro-Endo!!!! Although we cannot stop you from interacting if you are anti-endo, We kindly request you please just block us and move on if you have a problem with that.

About Us:

Why are we pro-endo?: When we were first discovering our system we were desperate to be “real enough” and accepted. Although the first system we discussed plurality with was pro-endo, they left the internet shortly after we opened up, and this lead us to being around sysmeds. To prove ourselves we purposely forced ourselves to remember trauma which put us in a worse position mentally. It took a long time, but through working to accept ourselves, we realized how bigoted we were being, which lead us to question a lot of things, such as our beliefs on endogenic plurality. Although we have gone a long way, some of our alters do not agree with us because it got so drilled into our mind that “endogenic systems are somehow just traumagenic and don’t remember” (which is a incredibly misinformed and harmful.)

What do we plan to talk about on this blog?: Really whatever we feel like! We may talk about Syscourse, plural positivity, advice from personal experience, our trauma, special interests and hyperfixations, ect. If we want to talk about it we probably will. (Although we always try to put the proper trigger and content warnings, and if we miss one by accident please tell us so we can add it as soon as possible!)

How to contact us/ask us a question: DMs are normally open unless a situation is happening! Along with that, feel free to use the ask me anything button, comment section on posts, or reblogs!

Mistakes on post: If we make a mistake, please inform us! We are always open to editing post (and do quite a bit), and we aren’t perfect, and especially if we say something bigoted, please correct us we are always open to learning about these topics, and acknowledge that we are privileged in certain ways. We would rather delete a long post we worked hard on if it is harmful then keep it up and go “wellll- it doesn’t affect me personally”

What are we “Pro” on:

We are obviously pro-endo!

We are pro self help. Although we think therapy is beneficial in many ways, not everyone can get a good therapist, wether that’s for financial reasons, none near you, or ableism, racism, sexism, ect in the medical/mental health field. Also it can benefit everyone to learn new coping mechanisms! (Please see a doctor if you are ill! You can only help yourself so much! We do not condone refusing to see doctors when you need to!!!

We are pro self diagnosing! (Just please do proper research before so, and even if it turns out you where wrong, you aren’t faking unless you actively attempt to fake.)

We are pro neopronouns and xenogenders!

People with villainized disabilities and/or mental disorders!

What are we “anti” on:

The trans-Id community. We don’t talk about this on this blog due to a lot of these people in this community being children, although we think what they are doing is dangerous and harmful, We would rather not direct harassment towards children. That being said, please do not harass anyone. (Also wanting to add, we are not anti-BIID, BIID is a completely separate thing.)

Pro-shipping. A big excuse for pro-shippers on why it’s okay is “it’s just fiction” but the thing is, the media we consume affects us and how we view the world. That’s why propaganda is so powerful. Yes, it’s just fiction, but it normalizes these things.

Bigotry.

”Narcissistic/Borderline/ect abuse” People with personality disorders can be abusive like anyone else can, but the idea of “[PD] abuse” is just to villainies those with Personality Disorders. This stops making sense when you change the disorder. (Example: “Post-Traumatic abuse” this sounds over the top, but we have legitimately seen someone say this.)

Ending:

Thanks for reading! Have a nice day, and remember you are doing great.

#pro endo #did #did osdd #did system #endo friendly #dissociative identity disorder #traumagenic system #actually plural #endo safe #system #system introduction #cw syscourse #syscourse #cw discourse

[wendytestabrat]

why c&k are BOTH narcissists (FROM THE VAULT [i’m guessing 2021])

UPDATE 2024: it amazes me when people will be like “kyle isn’t a narcissist!1!1!” 😩 just bc he doesn’t act exactly like cartman and bc he has empathy. like bitch not all narcissists lack empathy, that’s only ONE npd symptom in the dsm-5. i think most narcissists actually do have empathy (and in my opinion the narcissists who are empaths are wayy more nauseating to be around than the ones who lack it LMAO bc the empathetic narcissists know how to weaponize emotions against u and shit). honestly lack of empathy is seen a lot more commonly in sociopathy/psychopathy than it is in narcissism. or like when bitches try to defend or justify kyle for blowing up canada by saying “he isn’t like cartman bc he felt bad after!1!1” 😫 LOL SO WHAT?! i don’t give a shit that kyle felt remorse after he did that, it was still a shitty unforgivable thing to do that he shouldn’t have done in the first place. kyle feels bad after he does shitty things all the time yet he still repeats the same problematic behavior and never learns from it soooo. i feel like covert narcissism is becoming more widely talked abt now especially after that line in taylor’s song anti-hero “did you hear my covert narcissism i disguise as altruism like some kind of congressman” but yeah i was wayy ahead of my time talking abt this shit before that song LOL. i also feel like a lot of covert narcissists end up as therapists too which is why kyle was shown to be a therapist in the future. that’s honestly why i don’t trust therapists anymore bc i’m convinced the majority of them are just covert narcissists who get a sick kick out of seeing u helpless so they can preach their advice at you to put themselves on a pedestal lol. i’ve had a couple good therapists so i’m sure not all of them are like that and some are genuinely caring people, but the majority of therapists i’ve seen i got this icky feeling from them like they were using my pain and suffering to feel better abt their own shitty lives. bc like no one would choose a career where they get to listen to people’s problems all day unless that person had some fucked up issues themselves lol. i remember years ago i thought i wanted to be a therapist when i used to be an annoying overly empathetic nosy bitch like kyle LOL which was why i took a bunch of psychology and child development classes and now i’m stuck with a useless 2 year degree in that shit that i didn’t even want but that’s a whole story for another day. i don’t want a job where i have to listen to people’s problems all day no thank you 🤮 that subplot in the panderverse special where randy and the other dads were lashing out at colleges for giving them a degree they can’t do shit with hits HARD for me lol. college is an overrated scam i don’t make the rules i enforce them.

don’t get me wrong i think college can be a great thing which is why i loved it, but like only if you can take specific classes to acquire certain skills u need at that time. the whole system where u are rushed to pick one major and get a degree in only that thing is complete bs and doesn’t do SHIT for you. it should be about LEARNING stuff not getting a piece of paper that shows u did.

#KYMANRANTGARBAGE #kyman #south park

[noddytheornithopod]

I really don't understand the 'vote no because sovereignty' thing. Surely acknowledging Indigenous peoples in the constitution strengthens sovereignty?

I'm not the best person to ask on the issue, but I guess to start, I'd suggest looking at the Blak Sovereignty Movement website.

I would also suggest watching anti-fascist activist Tom Tanuki talk to various Indigenous activists who each have different positions on the Voice referendum (I've yet to watch the Yes video, but I am hoping to to see what the case for voting this way is from a reliable activist source that isn't just mainstream media coverage, one that understands more needs to be done).

To summarise what I understand however: basically, the idea is that acknowledging Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander people in the Australian constitution is at best a symbolic gesture that is functionally pointless, and at worst actively assimilationist, claiming that the First Nations on this continent were the first peoples of Australia when sovereignty was never ceded to the current nation state. Radical Aboriginal activists fear that doing this will also make it easier for the government to make laws against them, and like yeah they're already finding ways to do awful things to Indigenous people but to them it's basically saying "you belong to us, therefore you can't question the laws we make of you."

From what I've heard, apparently there have been calls for constitutional recognition that actually could've been worthwhile in the sense that it would enshrine inherent rights to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander people. The amendment being proposed is not that. The idea for this modern idea of constitutional recognition is something that actually originated from the Howard government. Aka, the guy who began the Northern Territory Intervention, one of the gravest human rights abuses in Australia's recent history.

The current amendment being proposed is basically an extension of this (they tried to promote constitutional recognition with the Recognise campaign but that never took off), plus the gesture of creating an elected advisory body (the latest in many ineffective Indigenous advisory bodies) that can give advice on Indigenous policy proposals in parliament, but not have the power to actually approve or veto anything. Basically, it can give advice on policy, but the government can easily ignore it (which they almost certainly will given their track record). There's a reason mining companies feel they can support it despite their interest going directly against Indigenous land rights - because they aren't threatened by it.

Would I like to be proven wrong and the success of this referendum somehow actually improves policies for Indigenous people and the government actually listens to the Voice? Of course I would. But from my understanding of Australian history, I have no reason not to believe that this is going to be weaponised to create the illusion of progress and possibly even compromise discussion of Indigenous issues by treating the Voice as some ultimate authority (despite their lack of power) full of people elected that won't dare to challenge the colonialist status quo too much.

I guess I should put a disclaimer in that I don't follow mainstream political views, the closest you'd get to what I believe in are the socialist strains of anarchism. I have an inherent distrust of systems of power, and I believe the most radical voices for Indigenous sovereignty are the ones I agree with the most. You'll find that they're calling for things like treaties instead (and ones that will actually force Indigenous sovereignty to be acknowledged and pave the way to decolonisation, not just more symbolic hogwash that can be broken like all the other treaties with Indigenous people in other settler colonial states).

I'll begin to wrap up by saying this: I'm not expecting you or anyone to agree with me. I come from a very specific perspective, and I believe in supporting the most radical calls for Blak Sovereignty, because assimilating into the current Australian state isn't going to resolve the inherent systemic racism Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islanders face.

I should also say that despite how the media frames it, Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander people are more divided on the Voice referendum than people recognise. Many different perspectives are out there, some supporting the proposal, others against it. The reasons for Yes, No or any other position that may come from it can have a whole host of reasons, whether it be someone reactionary like Jacinta Price pandering to racist conservatives who think any proposed improvement for Indigenous people is going to somehow create a reverse racist dystopia, or someone more radical like Lidia Thorpe who is a staunch advocate for Indigenous sovereignty who doesn't trust the government to implement this in a way that will truly benefit Indigenous people.

Finally... I've said it before, but I despise what the discourse around this referendum has become. The enforcement of a binary viewpoint of what Yes and No and its respective supporters mean, and the amount of racism Indigenous people have had to face. I don't think I need to bring up Lidia Thorpe receiving death threats from Neo-Nazis again.

Anyway, I hope this gives some clarity to what I believe. I'm just trying to listen to who I believe are the most reliable voices on Indigenous issues, and this is the conclusion I have come to.

#auspol #the voice #indigenous voice to parliament #voice referendum

[abronzeagegod]

Eldritch Tech Support 6

more eldritch tech support stories

"Hello and thank you for calling Tech Support, what is the nature of your problem?"

"I have a ghost haunting my wifi."

"I see, this is a fairly common problem. What kind of haunting are we dealing with? Is it a poltergeist, something that will move objects around the room, because that is a very easy fix with some zip-ties and anti-yank cable attachments."

"No, it's not a poltergeist. It's more... uh.. spirit? I don't know what the difference is really."

"Apologies! Can you describe the problem?"

"Well I think we're haunted by my partner's mother, and she doesn't like me much. So I feel like whenever she's mad at me the wifi starts running really slow and things will stop loading."

"Oh that is bad. Have you talked to an exorcist? We can recommend a few good ones if you need."

"Out of the question. My partner took their mom's death real hard and likes having her close by even like this."

"Hmm... Well there are a few options. You can always try to move to a wired connection, much harder for ghosts to interfere that way."

"That's not always viable since I often move around the house to find a quiet space to work, away from the kids and pets and everything."

"We do have a couple of wifi routers that operate on different wave lengths that ghosts have trouble interacting with. They are mildly pricey and if speed is a concern this will not be as fast as you would be normally experiencing but you wouldn't have to deal with interruptions."

"Ugh, that's not ideal honestly."

"Those are the options as I see them, I'm sorry."

"Yeah, I kind of figured."

"Well there is an... unorthodox method that a friend of mine said worked for her sister."

"I'll take anything you've got."

"If you think of your ghost as kind of an unruly pet, you simply need to give them some enrichment. You can try to place some wards around innocuous things in your house and give the ghost something to try and overcome, or even put up a couple of eldritch symbols and have the ghost try to complete them. My friend's sister would put on horror movies and some episodes of the ghost telenovela 'The Fifth Rose was Black'.

"Does that work?"

"It can give them something to focus on and interact with. Like a cat. But I have not dealt with this personally, and of course I have to say that Tech Support does not recognize this method and is not responsible for anything that may go wrong if you choose to attempt this advice."

"Yeah, yeah, of course. I can give it a try and see what happens, I don't want to be responsible for exorcising my spouse's mother so I'll do whatever. Thanks for your help."

"Thank you, and if there's anything else we can do for you please give us a call. If you were satisfied with our service today there will be a short survey at the end of this call. Have a good day, thank you for calling Tech Support."

if you liked this maybe consider supporting me on kofi

#eldritch tech support #my fiction #this is a short one because i'm working on a much bigger and longer version to see what a capital S Story of this might look like #its gonna be weird and involved and i can't quite decide on a tone or methodology yet #we'll see #in the meantime enjoy this one

[autismvampyre]

ok so audhd rant/asking for advice

we had a psychologicist come to the class to explain autism and adhd today. the reason why is bc i have faced a lot of discrimination, ableism and bullying from my peers bc of my disorders. my teachers felt we should all learn what the words mean and why they should never be used as insults, and how that can affect someone, which is a nice sentiment.

the person they picked was recommended by my mother, which should've been my first warning sign, bc try as she might my mother does not understand the autistic community. she trusts the professionals which is good bc im not a doctor and they're qualified, i get it; but also i dont fucking trust professionals to understand me because not once did my doctors help me understand when i was diagnosed. i asked to meet her before she came to the school, but my mom insisted she was great so i held back and tried to be hopeful, because even if a lot of my experience with professionals has been negative doesn't mean they're all bad and ignorant

anyways, she was exactly like every other psychologist ever and explained everything in the most basic way ive even seen. she literally sounded like the people who explained my diagnoses to me when i got them at age 11 and those mf's were literally useless. it took me years to actually understand what my disorder meant and i only figured it out by talking to other people with autism and adhd instead of reading shit by professionals and autism moms. the way we are portrayed by psychiatrists is not my experience at all and they often use outdated language and speak in very broad terms and don't bring up any of the things that i find important. i know not everyone with adhd and autism is the same but i genuinely cannot relate to the way they talk about us at all. like, this psychiatrist didn't even mention executive dysfunction and kept talking about how it "isn't an excuse" and fucking everyone agreed.

i feel like almost an anti-vaxxer, claiming i know better than doctors, so i genuinely do try to understand and accept doctors but i just cant fucking stand it. am i wrong for thinking she's wrong? like she has a degree, but she also doesn't seem to understand me and idk if im just a weird outlier even in my neurodivergence or if im right and she doesn't truly understand. like im not a doctor, im just a person who has these disorders but i genuinely feel misrepresented and like all these explanations are for other people to understand that they have to put up with me. i feel infantilised and really fucking bummed. like, i knew she wasn't gonna be perfect bc she isn't actually in the community but the level of generalization and misinformation was so disappointing

i feel fucking crazy. cause who am i to disagree with her when she's the professional, yk?? im no one. they won't listen to me. my classmates can't empathize with me like they do each other, and so many of them think they get it bc they're white teenage boys with adhd that are low support(and im happy for them that they feel good about it!! genuinely! and not saying they aren't valid, but in my experience many of them tend to unknowingly invalidate other people with the disorder who are different than them/have higher support needs) and can't seem to understand that other people have different experiences and struggles with the same disorder. i also live in a very conservative city, and even if the school is more liberal, we are still very high in MUF(the moderate party's youth) and you can tell because everyone i know is either apolitical or conservative, except me and the three leftists. it's a hostile environment, and i feel like im rambling but whatever. i needed to get it off my chest

#nydias post #nydia vents #actually autistic #actually neurodivergent #actually adhd #autistic experiences #autistic community #adhd things #actually audhd #audhd things #ramblings #autistic rant #autistic rambling #adhd rant #adhd rambling

[prismatic-bell]

[This ask is about a situation related to antisemitism and since I saw it's passover definitely skip or put off answering this if you need to. I'm not Jewish so I don't really know the significance of the holiday but I can't imagine it's pleasant to read abt this sort of thing then. This is not urgent.]

I'm anxious sending an ask off anon but I need advice and you have good well-educated takes and are one of my favourite Jewish bloggers, so you were the person I thought of to ask this.

I'm a gentile raised nonreligious but culturally Christian and I have a close friend who is a very devout Christian. About an hour ago I found out they believe a conspiracy theory that sounds incredibly antisemitic, I'm not sure if it is and looking it up returns nonsense but 100% sounds like a dogwhistle. It made me so upset I had a panic attack at the airport bc they're a very good friend of mine from my country's equivalent to high school and I'm worried about the path they're taking and how to stop them. Right now I have my Discord notifications off because I have a flight soon and I can't deal with this stress.

They believe Hollywood has an anti-Christian agenda and is trying to push Satanic imagery in the form of subliminal messages because "nobody in Hollywood talks about God but they love talking about the devil" and this is supposed to turn people against Christianity or something? I told them this was ridiculous, Christian and culturally Christian people dominate America and have most of the political and social power there (we don't live in America but we are both half-American and also we live in Europe so we have a similar issue although more with culturally Christian atheists like me), and we have a responsibility as the dominant group to not play the victim and act like we are being persecuted and oppressed. They said this was actually untrue because the problem Christians are "not real Christians" because "there is only one type of Christian which you would know if you read the Bible" and even that such people are actively and deliberately lying about being Christian and all this other really upsetting and scary stuff that absolves themselves of any systemic privilege that would make this as dangerous as I was saying.

I am not part of any religion, and I have few friends, let alone friends that are religious minorities specifically. I want to help support Jewish people and call out antisemitism but I actually have no idea how to do it when the person I'm talking to doesn't even believe they have the systemic privilege to do that harm. How do I, who have only an outsider's knowledge, explain Jewish people's oppression, which is notoriously poorly explained to goyim like me, to someone who won't even acknowledge Christian hegemony? Is it even okay for me to try, would it even be helpful? As someone who wants to be an ally, should I cut ties with my friend over this, should I try to educate them, should I just make sure they don't fall further? I think this is only in the early stages where they have no idea of the implications of this kind of mindset, idek if it is an antisemitism thing but it feels so obviously like a dogwhistle that my friend just isn't Hearing yet, and they've found an excuse that works for them so they can keep believing anything so I'm scared it's gonna get worse. It feels so awful to know someone I appreciate so much is plugging their ears and burying their head in the sand about something this important. They're a trans poc but they can't even find it in them to learn about the oppression Jews face? It just. it sucks.

Thank you if you're reading this, even if you don't respond. Have a nice passover. Sorry if I was rude or got anything wrong, I'm very clumsy with this sort of thing.

You weren’t at all rude, and I’m glad you took notice.

So I think you’re right that this is an early-stage dogwhistle your friend isn’t hearing yet. This seems like a weird cross between 1980s satanic panic, and the “the Jews control Hollywood” stereotype.

I’m having a very soggy-brain week, so I’m punting this to @athingofvikings and @aliciabenissa. I don’t know that your friend is unreachable, but you seem to feel you don’t have the tools to do it, and if you don’t it’s definitely better to borrow from someone else’s toolbox than to go in empty-handed.

[art-of-manliness]

The Best of The Art of Manliness: 2023

Another year has drawn to a close here on The Art of Manliness. We’re taking this week off to enjoy the holidays and reset for the year to come. While we’re away, please enjoy some of the best and most popular content we published here on AoM in 2023. From podcasts that took philosophical dives into big questions to articles that offered guides to practical life skills, we’ve covered it all — all with the aim of helping readers and listeners live more meaningful lives and start taking action on big and small things alike. Podcast Most Popular Podcasts of the Year Based on Listens * 7 Journaling Techniques That Can Change Your Life * Escape the Happiness Trap * The Power of Keeping Your Mouth Shut in a World That Won’t Stop Talking * The Essential Habits for Becoming an Agile, Vital, and Durable Human Being * Optimize Your Testosterone * Become a Morning Workout Person * Master Microtransitions to Improve the Happiness, Success, and Flow of Your Life * Advice on Making Love Last . . . From a Divorce Lawyer * The Wisdom of Psychopaths * How to Avoid Death by Comfort * Get Fit, Not Fried — The Benefits of Zone 2 Cardio * The 5 Shifts of Manhood Our Personal Picks  (Some of the most popular above would be included in this list as well): * What Lifting Ancient Stones Can Teach You About Being a Man * Thick Desires, Political Atheism, and Living an Anti-Mimetic Life * The Most Insightful Personality Test * Throw a 2-Hour Cocktail Party That Can Change Your Life * The Survival Myths That Can Get You Killed * Counterintuitive Ideas About Marriage, Family, and Kids * Break Your Bad Habits by Escaping the Scarcity Loop * Turn Your Anxiety Into a Strength * The Golden Rules of Success * Unpacking the Emotion No One Likes to Talk About * What the World of Psychology Gets Wrong About Men We created a Spotify Playlist with all of our best podcasts of 2023. You can listen in the player below or here.  If you’ve enjoyed and gotten something out of the podcast this year, we’d be very grateful if you decided to subscribe to the show or left it a review. Both things give the show a big boost and help more people discover it.  Articles Most Popular Articles of the Year Based on Traffic * Use the 90/10 Rule to Decide Where to Live * 7 Japanese Concepts That Can Improve Your Life * My New Favorite Knot * How to Do a Dopamine Reset * Thomas Jefferson’s 10 Rules for Life * The Digestive Power of an After-Dinner Walk * Legendary Bodybuilder Mike Mentzer’s Heavy Duty Method for Maximum Muscle Growth * The Rocky Films, Ranked * 50 Amazing Rarely Seen Photos From World War II * Beyond the Standard To-Do: 8 Lists You Should Be Keeping * The Ideal Man According to 7 Different Philosophers * Dumbbell Workouts for Size and Strength Our Personal Picks * Nolan Ryan Energy * Aristotle’s 11 Excellences for Living a Flourishing Life * What Happened to Our Mental Bandwidth? * The Stages of a Man’s Life * How to Manage the Vampire Problem * Exit, Voice, Loyalty, Neglect: Why People Leave, Stay, or Try to Burn It All Down * 14 Attributes of Greatness * Think Like Feynman: Why You Should Have 12 Favorite Problems * How to Choose What Advice to Take * Is the 7-Year-Itch Real? * Are You a Strategist or an Operator? * 5 Lessons From the Iron Sunday Firesides Favorites * You Never Know How Many Chapters Are Still to Come * No Bad Feelings * Through Disappointment to the Stars * Worry More About Rusting Out Than Burning Out * The Courage to Be Well * There’s Only So Far You Can Get Off Track in a Week * Life Is for Living * Parent the Immature in Others * The Saddest Epitaph * Attention Adults — You Should Know What You’re Doing * Switch Off Your Handicap Radio * Remember IT Will Die To never miss an article or episode of the podcast, be sure to subscribe to our FREE email newsletter. You can choose the daily or weekly option.  Big thanks to everyone who… http://dlvr.it/T0gDk9

[alostlittleriverlotus]

i am actually so fucking mad.

Tw/Cw for minor mention of r*pe/r*pist/sexual abuse and ableism towards NPD and just shitty behaviour overall.

So I checked my notifs on quora. I used to post answers to questions to fight the ableism and actually educate on there since Quora users are...so incredibly ableist and anti-intellectualism especially when it comes to personality disorders. I had answered a question on "are all narcissists dangerous" or some shit like that. And it was a while ago. Literally just saw a reply to my comment from a guy that took what I said in my comment and applied it to r*pists like "r*pists aren't actually bad, they just have a sexual disorder. 'sexual abuse' isn't real."

Bro. What the actual fuck? That was disgusting. Went on to his profile and saw he said it's okay to hit a "mentally challenged" person if they hit you to teach them not to hit. Um no, that is not how you teach ANYONE not to hit. And then gave advice on how to get a girl to talk to you by saying you had to bribe them. Ew. Ew ew ew ew ew!!!

What the actual fuck? Luckily Quora lets you delete comments on you answers so I did. That was appalling and disgusting. What the actual fuck is with anti-narcissists and especially the ones on Quora? What the fuck is wrong with Quora users in general?! That is probably the worst I've seen and it pisses me off as a victim of sexual abuse and having had MULTIPLE FRIENDS be sexually abused and my girlfriend be sexually abused. Do not compare sexual abuse to a fucking personality disorder! That was...probably the worst comment I've ever received and I've been flat out called an emotional leech that drains everyone around me and told I was lying about my ex boyfriend being abusive. What the actual fuck is wrong with people? You cannot even begin to compare the two. That is disgusting.

#actually npd #narcissistic #actually narcissistic #narcissistic personality disorder #npd #ableism #tw/cw #tw sa mention #cw ableism #I'm actually so mad because that is repulsive to reply with THAT #Quora being ableist as usual #npd stigma #sa mention #pissed off

[parasex-jamboree]

Me vs Hypnokink

I don’t mean to bill myself as an export in hypnosis or even particularly accomplished. I’m just trying to collect my thoughts. Hypnosis evokes romantic and mystical imagery, but it’s a mess to figure out. And if you want to kink on something, you need knowledge and knowledge needs organization. It’s easy to restrain someone and inflict pain. It takes knowledge of the body in order for the subject to (eventually) walk away afterwards, with no loss of functionality. One should expect a similar standard for mind games.

My problem with hypnokink was that it felt unclear how to do it safely. From the start, I had two real world examples that I considered illustrative - the role of hypnotic memory ‘retrieval’ (often resulting in false memories) in the Satanic Panic, and the use of mind control myths such as MK Ultra as a method of control in abusive relationships. My time absorbing the chatter of hypno twitter presented me with a third example - online communities built around ‘addictive’ or ‘personality erasing’ audio files, that despite their outlandish claims, seemed to leave people with genuine distress and/or dissociative issues. Hypnosis seemed to do real damage, at least. 

I encountered multiple models of how hypnosis worked, without any citation and sometimes directly contradicting mainstream psychology (like my personal experience with cognitive-behavioral therapy). I felt that If I couldn’t trust the how of it, then I couldn’t trust the how it could go wrong. There seemed to be a dangerous optimism about hypnotism. The emphasis tended to be on the hypnotist being responsible with their influence, which struck me more as leaning into the desired fantasy of power rather than giving useful advice about when and why one’s influence might be greater or different than anticipated. Moreover, there was obvious reliance on the placebo effect, but it was rarely named and discussed circuitously. It began to feel reminiscent of the double-speak of pseudo-scientific conspiracy podcasts I used to listen to out of morbid curiosity. 

After bouncing off a few popular resources, like Mind Play, my search started to lean academic - specifically, the writings of Dierdre Barrett, Stephen Jay Lynn, and Marty Sapp. Here, I began to understand hypnotism and its problems as an issue of a subject’s ability to stay grounded in reality. What was often flattened into a scale of ‘hypnotizability’ or ‘responsiveness’ was actually the overlapping shadows of several tendencies such as credulity, visualization, dissociation, focus, etc. What created the extreme reactions to hypnosis was when a subject took one of these tendencies to the point of disorder. Also important is the assertion that nothing happens under hypnosis that isn’t possible under other circumstances. Hypnosis is not a state of the subject, but a formalism and a ritual.

My current opinion is that there is no objectively, hypnosis isn’t a useful descriptor – rather, my impression is that there are diverse would-be hypnotists of diverse traditions who all claim what they do (sometimes wildly different from each other) is hypnosis. I think it may be better to consider ‘hypnosis’ as an aspiration term akin to perpetual motion or anti-gravity. Hypnosis is a hypnotist’s attempt to communicate with some part of a person’s mind they have no conscious awareness of (roundly, “the Unconscious”). What constitutes the Unconscious Mind, if an Unconscious Mind even exists, or what can be gained through communication with the Unconscious are also vague and vary from hypnotist to hypnotist. From scientists to showmen, from therapists to thaumaturgists, the mythology of hypnosis keeps branching and changing as new would-be hypnotists find the idea too tempting (or romantic) to let go.

Because of this, I think it’s useful to separate “hypnosis” from “hypnotic techniques” – the actual techniques that hypnotists employ on their subjects. While there is no dependable evidence for hypnosis-as-claimed, various hypnotic techniques can produce effects recognized by mainstream psychology: task absorption, imaginative anticipation, relaxation, dissociation, etc. The ability of hypnotic techniques to elicit these effects is what fuels the myth of hypnosis. The hypnotist-and-subject dyad merely provides a ritual context where eliciting these phenomena can be (consensually, hopefully) agreed on. All of this is amplified by the Placebo Effect, where authority + ritual + expectation can give the subject the illusion of change or to misattribute the cause of change.

Why I think this differentiation matters is four points. First, while the narrative of hypnosis is part of the fun, I think it makes for poor organizing principle if you want to understand the psychology behind various hypnotic techniques. How these states work and the dangers posed by them can be researched completely independent of hypnosis. Second, I see the huge emphasis on the Placebo Effect as a consent issue. Placebos expressly depend on a difference between what the expert knows and what the subject knows. That’s not conducive to mutual risk agreement. Third, I think one of the dangers is when a subject mis-attributes the cause of what they experience. Developing the for-real conviction that anyone saying a trigger word can (for example) alter your memory is itself mentally dangerous. And fourth, I think that asserting that harm rendered by hypnotic technique is a unique class of harm may discourage victims from seeking appropriate professional help.

To be honest, I do feel better about hypno kink after parsing through all this. The climb is different than I expected, but I do feel like some storm clouds have parted from around the mountain. I’m not sure I’m saying anything particular new, but I do think there’s much that gets obfuscated just by universally applying ‘hypnosis’ – a pseudo-scientific term that twists to whatever’s being claimed – instead of demanding specifics. I’m learning and growing, and I’m trying to make sure I know what I’m growing into - not an all-powerful mentalist, but someone who knows what he can and can’t promise.

#hypnosis #hypnokink

[king-shango-the-great]

Hi! I’ve recently seen an argument you’ve had with a black!girl x kpop writer, and even though I’ve never been too fond of slapping a race on that kind of content, as I also feel that it’s fetishizing, I found a lot of your responses to be very thought-provoking and worth looking into (which I did). As a black person who does enjoy K-pop out of my love for music of all cultures (including French music, and Middle-eastern music), I couldn’t help but feel guilty for supporting certain artists: Should I feel guilty? Is it okay if I listen to them at all? Another thing I wanted to point out is that I agree that anime is VERY UNSAFE for black viewers and I never understood why black people (or people in general) wanted to be associated with it. I find it to be very exploitive of black culture, BIGOTED, and perverted as a whole—not my cup of tea.

But back to K-pop and the associated content here on tumblr, do you think it’s harmful that I read NSFW kpop ff (even if it’s not race-specific, but just random ones) in general? Is consuming SFW kpop fiction wrong too, even if it isn’t race specific?

I admit that i find some of these men attractive and reading the stories people come up with are interesting, but I never want it to be perceived as a fetish when I just find it fun. Though, perhaps I should reframe my idea of fun and find healthier means of enjoyment if you recommend. ✅

I’m a black teen in a society where Asian people are glorified, and I just really don’t want to be apart of anything that contributes to racism, self hatred, anti black ideologies, or that could hurt me or my people. I’d really appreciate it if you responded with tips/advice! Thanks ❤️ You’re doing a great thing by speaking up for what you believe in and going against the masses with boldness, btw!

Greetings!!

First, let me say that I appreciate the time you took to reach out to me. This is the dialogue I was seeking to have, before folks got defensive about it in that other thread. But, your response made it all the more worth it. I like public discussions, because even if the person I'm talking directly doesn't get it, then there's always people reading it that may gain something from what's been said.

You sent me 2 Asks on here, so I will answer both in this one ask, if that's okay.

<<Hi! I’ve recently seen an argument you’ve had with a black!girl x kpop writer, and even though I’ve never been too fond of slapping a race on that kind of content, as I also feel that it’s fetishizing, I found a lot of your responses to be very thought-provoking and worth looking into (which I did). As a black person who does enjoy K-pop out of my love for music of all cultures (including French music, and Middle-eastern music), I couldn’t help but feel guilty for supporting certain artists: Should I feel guilty? Is it okay if I listen to them at all?>>

I never want to be the person that tells people what they can and can't, or should and shouldn't do. My only intent is to inform people about the choices they make, while also leading by example and sharing why I don't indulge in certain things. That said, I have zero tolerance for cultures, religions, music, etc that disparages Black people globally. I don't know where you live, so for the sake of discussion, I'm going to assume you live in the US (feel free to correct me on that). As such, I don't even listen to Rap/Hip-Hop music, nor engage in the culture as much as I used to when I was much younger, for this same reason.

When I was your age, Hip-Hop was the voice of the people, that spoke to our issues of Oppression. Now, it's become a corporate-controlled, cultural catch-all for all the worst elements of our community: violence, crime, materialism, misogyny, substance abuse, sexual deviancy, gang/prison culture, use of harsh/ugly words, and an overall lack of intellectual growth. So, I take in very little Hip-Hop these days, and the little that I do take in, is usually from years past. Music for me should always be uplifting and inspiration for every listener, but very little music from contemporary Black America speaks of love, respect, etc. Its all depression music now.

So, instead of recommending what not to listen to, I much rather recommend some music genres that you could listen to, either instead of or in addition to your current listening choices. First, I think every one could benefit from listening to music that came long before them. I highly recommend listening to the music your parents, grandparents and great-grandparents listened to when they were your age and older. It was artful, soulful, and fulfilling in all the ways that current music is not.

Also, I personally do not listen to Middle Eastern and French music, because both these groups are highly oppressive to Black people. Nonetheless, it always amazes me, how Black people the world over will indulge in everyone else's genres, but not our own. As such, I would suggest dabbling in music from around the African Diaspora. Caribbean music (Reggae, Soca, etc), Afro-Latin Jazz, and Continental African (Afro-Beats, Amapiano, etc) are great places to find soulful, melodic, and rythmic music, directly from your own Ancestors. Tjere are a dozen different Caribbean music styles, & dozens of African styles. On my own page, I regularly post music under the tag "#Shango's Playlist". That could be a great point of reference for you with new music. 

<<Another thing I wanted to point out is that I agree that anime is VERY UNSAFE for black viewers and I never understood why black people (or people in general) wanted to be associated with it. I find it to be very exploitive of black culture, BIGOTED, and perverted as a whole—not my cup of tea.>>

I absolutely agree with this. For the life of me, I don't undertand the obsession with anime, especially for Black people. I posted this short vid about it recently....

And.....

As someone who is a writer, and has collabed with other artists on things in the past, it's weird watching Black people try to convey the Black experience via a non-Black lens. I've seen artists and writers mimic the Anime style and aesthetic, to the point that some of them try to even go to Japan to get jobs as illustrators, only to get rejected as soon as they get off the plane. It's sad and embarrassing, just how disconnected we seem to be about how the world works. But I digress....

>>But back to K-pop and the associated content here on tumblr, do you think it’s harmful that I read NSFW kpop ff (even if it’s not race-specific, but just random ones) in general? Is consuming SFW kpop fiction wrong too, even if it isn’t race specific?>>

I would say to at least try to balance the non-Black content that you indulge in, with actual Black content as well. Non-Black people should not live rent-free in your head, when your own people don't live there as well. But ultimately, K-Poop is racist, whether NSFW, or SFW. And this is why I don't ever, and would never indulge or partake in it. 

Furthermore, I also have no interest in K-Poop's watered down & exploitative take on the Black experience. If I wanna see people twerking with bandanas, gold teeth. & fake dreads, I can watch Black rap videos for that 🤷🏿‍♂️. Just like I don't wanna see non-Black women with fake butts & fake lips, when I can worship those natural traits on Black women.

<<I admit that i find some of these men attractive and reading the stories people come up with are interesting, but I never want it to be perceived as a fetish when I just find it fun.  Though, perhaps I should reframe my idea of fun and find healthier means of enjoyment if you recommend. ✅>>

Admittedly, I would always rather see Black people developing an attraction for their own first and foremost. And ultimately, it is in fact fetishizing those people. But it's good that you are at least willing to seek healthier (key word) means of enjoyment. I don't think in this society, Black people (especially the youth) are taught Black Love, as the media only portrays Black people with non-Black people on TV, marketing, etc. This is how misguided notions about beauty gets pushed on people, especially Black people, who suffer from self-esteem issues in this regard.

<<I’m a black teen in a society where Asian people are glorified, and I just really don’t want to be apart of anything that contributes to racism, self hatred, anti black ideologies, or that could hurt me or my people.

I’d really appreciate it if you responded with tips/advice! Thanks ❤️ You’re doing a great thing by speaking up for what you believe in and going against the masses with boldness, btw!>>

I cannot tell you how much this means to hear!! 🙏🏿

I don't understand the obsession with Asian people either, especially as a Black person. And that goes beyond their treatment of us as Blacks. The unparalleled Beauty of the Black Woman, and the raw power and strength of the Black Man is something that no other group can compare to. Personally to me, Asian women look like little boys to me; all small, frail, awkward, uncoordinated, etc, and that's not something that I personally find appealing. Not to say that every Black person is big and powerful, but there's a style and grace and charm to Black people that no other group has. Which is why I highly suggest tapping into that from your own people, be it in the form all of our creative expressions (music, dance, art, etc). Doing so will also help unlock all those wonderful qualities within yourself as well, because art imitates life (as I'm sure you know), and so Black expressions are reflections of all the wonderful qualities that are within you.

<<I’m the same girl from the last question, but I was also wondering if you think it’s harmful for non-black girls to engage with K-pop fiction (whether it be race-based or not, or 18+ or not).>>

Honestly, I really don't focus on what non-Black people do or don't do. Most of these Non-Black People feel the exact same way about us that the K-Poop people do, so they already have that in common. As Black people, I believe that our primary focus should come from, and should be on ourselves. Every other group puts themselves first, and we should be doing the same.

Hopefully this answers and addresses your issues. If not, please feel free to ask more questions as you feel the need. I'd be delighted to answer. 🙏🏿

#Each One Teach One #Shango's Thoughts

[a-moth-to-the-light]

dearest, there are no more demons in the walls. (nov 28, 2022)

The Day, In Short

Woke up very late today, which isn't unusual on my current cocktail of meds, but it was still disappointing. Against my will, I have been quite taken in by the current reading for my Monday morning class, The Great Gatsby, and I'm sad I didn't get to discuss it. Overall, it has been a somber but not unpleasant day. I took a walk, watched some TV, and attempted a trivia night, though anxiety and pain decided it was too much, leaving me to spend most of the event pretty much completely shut down before launching into full anxiety mode and leaving early.

Though I'm mildly disappointed in myself, it really is only mild. In my project of becoming anti-suicidal (as opposed to just not having suicidal thoughts at any given point in time), I've been slowly learning how to see life in the long-term (as in, past the next week), and that has been really helpful! Just because I can't do trivia night tonight doesn't mean I'll never be able to, and it certainly doesn't mean that I'll never socialize again. Through my experiences with chronic physical pain, I have come to understand my painful physical and mental conditions as cycles of triggers, downs, coping, and then ups, an understanding which is really instrumental to reminding me that my activity level in my down-phases will not be my limit forever and that pushing myself unnecessarily on these days will do nothing for my future self but harm her. Right now, I'm finishing off some leftover pumpkin pie after making progress on an important paper, so it seems that today's down isn't so completely miserable after all.

the little dot thingies

I got a healthcare point today for messaging my doctor! Yesterday, I got one for buying some therapist-recommended supplies for at-home trigger point therapy--there's one more thing left to buy, so I'll try to get to that this week!

I also got a point for journaling and a few for leaving something unfinished! A bit from today's journal entry, which was mostly about my difficulties with reading:

Back then (at least, as far back as we can remember), you read so much because you didn't like your life, because you wanted to be outside your body and the memories it held, because you couldn't feel anything without your books, because you needed something to help you forget about the demons in the walls. Dearest, there are no more demons in the walls. Now, reading, in many ways, is a bodily experience, and that, in fact, is something we love it for. We love the way our mind and body feel so in sync about books, the way we can, for once, coalesce, bonding together in joy. We like our life, and our body is an active participant in reading now, too. (No wonder we've been struggling physically with some readings.) Now, we feel so much--we have so many friends who aren't imaginary, and a history of lovers who aren't our obsessions from books. And, love, that isn't to say that we no longer need books, but simply to say... books need a new space in our life. Right now, our personal reading is, in many ways, a relic from our past, transported into a context in which it no longer works.

OMGOMG LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT

Greek Tragedy: I first heard this one at karaoke a few months ago, and it's back to haunt me. All I have for you, to justify the way I let myself cry over this song without doing the obvious and listening to something else instead, is this lyric:

It's wrong but surely worse to leave.

Go listen: Enjoy, suffer. Do both at once!

Princess & Tengic: Yep, I get "Princess" now. I tried listening to it back when it first came out as a single and couldn't even get through the song, but I gave the album a try on my walk today, and I suppose it's just the right day for Majiko's voice to hit like a ton of bricks--I left the poor song on repeat for a solid 15 minutes before finally coaxing myself on to the next track in the album.

I remember someone complaining about Taemin's voice on "Advice" back when it first came out, and I understand--I can hear how his strained high notes combined with the strangely agressive layering at the end of the chorus would be unpleasant--but his performance makes me feel all sorts of things anyway. I love "Advice", especially the parts of Taemin's vocal performance that echo the more grating vocal trends in rock music, so I love Majiko on "Princess" (and, by extension, "Tengic") for the same reason. It seems wrong to say that Majiko sounds fantastic here because of how odd some of her vocal choices are, but I think "awe-inspiring" as a descriptor is a perfect fit.

I have no idea where to fit this part, but the weird whirring EDM in "Princess" completely works for me, melding into the rest of the song like the most annoying noises do in f(x) tracks ("Hot Summer", anyone?), managing to add interest instead of making me want to click away.

things that make brain buzz

I've made a lot more progress on editing the first fiction piece I mentioned last time! I feel a lot better about its clarity, though I'm still working on polish, specifically in the flow of ideas--I think I'll try and get some other eyes on it to help me out! What's funny is, I'm not even sure what I want to do with this piece--maybe submit it to a contest someday? I just want to edit it because I love spending time with it, love watching its ideas become sharper and sharper with each successive round of work.

This is especially exciting because I struggle with editing as a process. I tend to write under a sort of spell, so making significant changes to my work has never made much sense to me: what reason do I have to leave my messy handprints all over words from the heavens? This view, of course, is problematic--if I just sit around waiting for the words to arrive, waiting to be possessed by whatever it is that composes the pieces I am most proud of, I'll never actually improve, never understand the artistry that goes into writing, and likely never be inspired enough to create a piece longer than a few pages--so I'm working to change it, and one part of that is growing accustomed to the editing process, twisting words into what I want instead of just relying on the belief that they'll be born flawless.

No quotes from this piece for y'all yet--I think I'll be posting it soon, since I feel like it's at a good stopping point where it can finally meet the world outside my drafts!

Will I Do Anything Interesting Tomorrow?

Right now, all I have on the schedule for tomorrow are my classes & therapy. Since I'm off-duty for apartment chores this week, I'll spend some time cleaning up within my room, maybe vacuuming or sorting through some books & papers. What with my classes, I doubt I'll have much time to myself beyond that (Tuesdays and Wednesdays are my most crowded days), so I'm not hoping for much more than to relax!

Quote of the Day!

The football where you wear the leggings is different from the football where you wear the shorts!

-- me, in class today

#majiko just keeps being fantastic #i never should have underestimated her after she released both irony and fantasy!!! #six keeps on running #looooooooooong journal #sorry bestie!