#Anyway I've been rereading Desert Storm and my love of badass and disturbingly military Future Ahsoka keeps rearing its head

[phoenixyfriend]

So sometimes when I read time-travel fics about Ben Kenobi, I just get really hyped up with mental images of him, after a few years, getting a message from just-arrived time-traveler Ahsoka (default is Systems' Scourge, but a late-Rebels Fulcrum is also good so long as she can bring Rex, maybe Wolffe and Ezra).

And just. Like. That first meeting is Ahsoka reaching out with a message to the council for Ben (after catching wind of him through bounty rumors or on an Official Jedi Business Press Release):

Hey,

Rex wants to know why you're palling around with the Prime.

Signed, The Girl Who Died at Mortis

which is enough Words Of Import that it's Obviously Her without explaining a goddamn thing, and Ben just. Completely stalls out and has a breakdown on the spot.

Mini-Obi, calling the number she left on the message, in front of the entire council: Hi this is Padawan Obi-Wan Kenobi, who are you and why are you breaking my Uncle Ben? He's just standing there. You broke him.

Ahsoka: Hi, Obi-Wan, this is General Ashla Torrent of the 501st, aaaaaaaaaaaand let's call it payback for the Hardeen Incident.

Ben, snapping out of it at the sound of her voice: I THOUGHT YOU DIED IN THE PURGE.

Ahsoka: WELL I THOUGHT YOU DIED IN THE PURGE TOO, SIR.

Ben: I WENT TO MANDALORE. I VISITED YOUR GRAVE.

Ahsoka: AND I ATTENDED YOUR FUNERAL AFTER YOU FAKED YOUR DEATH IN MY ARMS WHEN I WAS SIXTEEN, WE'LL CALL IT EVEN.

Obi-Wan: Hold on what the fuck even are you two to each other this is NOT where I thought this was going

--

"So this Purge happened on... Mortis?"

"No, I was on Mandalore when Order 66 went out. Mortis was like two years earlier and I actually did die but it was only for a few minutes so it doesn't count. I was fifteen so it was like ten years ago for me, it's fine."

Everyone assumes she means like a "My heart stopped long enough for a clinical death" sort of thing and doesn't pursue it.

--

Someone: She’s got lightsabers. Is she a Jedi?

Ben: Good question. Are you a Jedi?

Ahsoka: No.

Ben: I guess she’s not a Jedi.

- @atagotiak

--

"Are those soldiers Mandalorian?"

"Debatable! Let's go with no."

"They're wearing armor and refuse to de-helmet."

"Trust me, you don't want them to."

--

Also in this context, everyone just kinda goes [shrug emoji] and says Ahsoka was Ben's Second Padawan whose training was cut short because Reasons (and now she's not a Jedi anymore), because most people don't want to sit through the full story of which padawan is whose and why the age differences were stupid when he was handling half her training anyway.

The main joke is actually that she's Ben's Padawan One Point Five. Only people who sit through the explanation (which isn't actually that long) get to understand it.

--

Ahsoka just casually joking about her experiences as a war padawan and everyone's like Oh So That's Why Ben Drives His Students So Hard.

He Had To Keep This One Alive.

--

Ahsoka, brightly: My first day with my master, I almost died four times and that was considered normal.

Jedi: [horror]

Ben, thinking about Bandomeer: I mean, same.

Ahsoka: And so did my official master!

Ben: Well, he spread it out over a week, but he was also nine, so...

(They're technically lying but only because in all three cases, their near-death experiences occurred in the day/days leading up to their Master accepting them.)

#the clone wars #star wars #Ahsoka Tano #Obi Wan Kenobi #Ben Kenobi #Captain Rex #Phoenix Talks #Anyway I've been rereading Desert Storm and my love of badass and disturbingly military Future Ahsoka keeps rearing its head