A 100% wish fulfillment ❤️🩹 (a type of lie in a sense) for the Twiyor/Loidyor fandom.
Happy April Fool's Day 😌
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Partly inspired by this post by @shinybluebirdwizard and @mika213, especially the “Twiyor is a lil slow dinky boat that upgrades over time” part.
The Musebunny(TM) saw it, then lovingly dropkicked me on the head with this idea.
Thanks again to all my friends who were both the test subjects and proofreaders for my elaborate shitposting 🫡 You guys are awesome ❤️❤️❤️
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"Stede wanted to be a pirate and now he's not going to be one, which is bad."
Did he really want to be a pirate? Stede wanted to be a storybook pirate; he wanted to be the pirate in his games and his imagination, who had swashbuckling adventures. The entire first season deals with him learning what piracy really is. He sees what it has done to Ed, quite literally history's greatest pirate, within the first half hour of their meeting. Most of the fun he has, has nothing to do with actual piracy - it's playing games with his crew, going on treasure hunts with Ed, putting on plays. He likes making up plans, but he doesn't like actual piracy. When he accidentally kills a man, it horrifies him and haunts him, and continues to until the end of the season. He goes to therapy about it.
Into Season 2, the entire point of Stede's piracy is still not piracy. It's to get back to Ed. Stede's fantasy in the beginning is about being the storybook pirate who defeats the villain and runs across the beach to his one true love, who isn't mad at him and never was. It's a fairytale. And even there, reality is creeping in - dream-Izzy tells him, "I didn't make you leave him. You did that yourself." The reality is that Ed has gone into a suicidal spiral, and Stede finds him mostly dead.
The one time that Stede becomes a "real pirate" in the real world, it goes to his head, but it's not even because of his love of piracy. It's because he's suddenly popular. People are buying him drinks and clapping him on the back. No one's calling him "Steve." No one's making fun of him. And still, the only thing he wants to do when he does something cool is go tell Ed about it.
And even then...it's hollow. Everyone around him are sycophants. Ed has left him. His crew are suddenly leaving him. It all ends with him getting his ass kicked by a real pirate. He didn't even like doing the thing that made him popular; he kills Ned Low and runs off to hide. The whole sequence at Jackie'z is a mirror of the sequence at the pub when he goes home - everyone thinks he's cool, but for none of the reasons that are authentic to who he is or what he really wants.
Stede wanted a family who loved him. He wanted friends who liked him for him. He wanted someone to play with. He wanted to marry for love. And he has all those things at the end.
He's not a pirate. He's not having second thoughts.
I'm not sure why this is hard to see.
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Monty: *stirring in his bed, then getting up to open the window to smile outside* I see you! 😁 You've been playing hide-and-seek with me all day!
Law: *stepping out of the shadows* Apparently not as well as I'd hoped if you found me so easily.
Monty: You're silly trying to do both at once!
Law: Still perceptive then...
Monty: What's persimmon? You're weird.
Law: Let me ask you something. Do you know who I am?
Monty: *nodding* You're the guy I dream about sometimes. The one who's mad at the whole world.
Law: So you know my name too?
Monty: It's Law!
Law: Just Law?
Monty: Trafalgar Law.
Law: And what would you think if there was a D added to that name?
Monty: No, your name doesn't work with a D. Where would you even put it? Would your name be Dlaw? Or Lawd? Or Tradfalgar? Datrafler? 🤨
Law: He may have been created before Doflamingo found out, so I shouldn't be surprised he didn't know about me having the initial. Even so, that should have gotten some kind of response. Doflamingo's hatred for the D clan runs deep. He and Cora knew it's significance from a young age. So why isn't this boy reacting? He should be chomping at the bit to attack me. Maybe he's lying to throw me off?
Monty: Your face still looks angry and your hat's still fluffy but you've gotten taller.
Law: *startled out of his thoughts* Yeah, things have changed over time. Take this island. It's not allied with the World Government and pirate attacks used to be pretty frequent, but recently they've dwindled to almost nothing. You have any idea why that is?
Monty: It's meeeeee! 😃 I keep all the bad pirates away with my strings!
Law: That right? You must be pretty fond of this place.
Monty: Uh-huh! I like it here!
Law: And just how long are you planning on staying?
Monty: Forever and ever!
Law: You sure? It's a pretty average island. Not very fancy, and the people here might not want to do what you want all the time.
Monty: No, it's great! See that thing on the roof? That's a gutter! You're a pirate so I bet you don't know what gutters are! They go on your house and make the water run down when it rains and it goes into a barrel, and when there's no rain leafs fall in it and you can toss them all over the place! 😃
Law: What does that have to do with-
Monty: See those flowers? I helped Mommy plant them yesterday. I rubbed mud all over my tummy and ran off with the hose and she had to chase me! 😆
Law: You have a very loose definition of "help".
Monty: Daddy's taking me fishing tomorrow! He says we might not catch anything, but I'm gonna catch lots of fish! I'm gonna catch a tuna and an octopus and some shrimp! Shrimps are my favorite because they're pink and... pink...😕
Law: *hesitantly reaching for Kikoku*
Monty: Wait here! *goes further into his room and brings back a drawing* Here.
Law: Look, I don't have time for...*stunned into silence*
Monty: *holding out the drawing of a tall blonde man covered in hearts* It's the Heart Man. I drew him today when I realized you were nearby. I don't like dreaming about him because he makes me scared and sad and mad, but I know you like him. So this is for you.
Law: *very slowly taking the drawing and staring at it for a long time*
Monty: Do you like it?
Law: Be honest with me. Are there any strings attached with this?
Monty: No, I only used crayon. So do you like it or not?
Law: Yeah. Looks just like him. *tucking the drawing into his coat* You should get back to bed. Big day of fishing tomorrow, right?
Monty: *big yawn* Not tired.
Law: Guess you are a bad liar then. *turns away* And you're right about this island. It seems nice. Have a good life here, Montalvo. *shambles' away*
Monty: *getting back under the covers just as his dad comes in*
Richard: Monty? Who are you talking to?
Monty: *happily flapping his wings* Law! He came to visit tonight and I gave him my drawing and he liked it! 😁
Richard: Oh, really? That's good to hear. But right now you two should be getting some sleep. You can talk to Law some more in the morning.
Monty: Nah, he'll be gone by then. But he'll be fine! Even if he doesn't have a gutter.
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I do a lot of baking especially during the holidays. Three years ago I made 12 -250ml bottles of vanilla extract, I used only the best quality vanilla beans and vodka. The longer it ferments the better it gets, and this is truly a gourmet extract.
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