#Based on assumptions

[aropride]

are they really “fem presenting” or do they just have boobs. are they really “masc presenting” or do they just have facial hair

#text #are they ‘presenting’ or ‘aligned’ as ‘masc’/‘fem’ or are you making assumptions based on uncontrollable physical traits

[inkskinned]

he says i hate everyone except you and that is addictive and that is kind of romantic and beautiful because you're young and you're kind of a sarcastic asshole too and you don't like bad boys, per say, but you don't really like good ones either. and you like that you were the exception, it felt like winning.

except life is not a romance book, and he was kind of being honest. he doesn't learn to be nice to your friends. he only tolerates your family. you have to beg him to come with you to birthday parties, he complains the whole time. you want to go on a date but - people are often there, wherever you're going. he's just so angry. about everything, is the thing. in the romance book, doesn't he eventually soften? can't you teach him, through your own sense of whimsy and comfort?

at first - you know introverts often need smaller friend groups, and honestly, you're fine staying at home too. you like the small, tidy life you occupy. you're not going to punish him for his personality type.

except: he really does hate everyone but you. which means he doesn't get along with his therapist. which means he has no one to talk to except for you. which means you take care of him constantly, since he otherwise has no one. which means you sometimes have to apologize for him. which means he keeps you home from seeing your friends because he hates them. you're the single exception.

about a decade from this experience, you'll type into google: how to know if a relationship is codependent.

he wraps an arm around you. i hate everyone except you. these days, you're learning what he's actually confessing is i have very little practice being kind.

#i used to think it was romantic too and then i was like. now i see it as a HUGE red flag #writeblr #it is also almost EXCLUSIVELY said by immature ppl who think this is normal #fyi even if u think it's funny and ur like 'im an introvert it's just TRUE' like. you need therapy (ily tho) #healed introversion is just ''i would prefer to be by myself'' not ''i hate every person'' ... hate is not normal. that is not healthy #im sorry. i know it feels accurate. but if you're walking around with that kind of rage.... #1. you're making a LOT of assumptions about every single person u have ever met. which is often unfair and unkind #and also usually involves judging people based on their worst moments or little mistakes #2. you are being unfair to the person who is ur ''exception'' #3. there is a VAST difference between ''ur my favorite person'' and ''the ONLY person i like.'' #idk i think this is just a personal bias thing tbh #im sure there are people who have this experience normally #but i have YET to find a man who thinks like this and ISNT absolute DOGSHIT. although tbh.... like. im sure he exists #when u hit like 30 some of the things that were once kind of hot now just sound fucking exhausting. like ''im in a band'' #edit in the tags: i used to kind of be like this too. but the thing is that like. my life became so much more peaceful #once i started believing that people are generally good. like yes i am mad at the world at large #but it's just.... a very hard way to live. you're not a bad person or wrong for the ways other people hurt you and taught you to be angry. #but that anger will continue to hurt YOU. it will punish YOU. it will prevent YOU from making new deep connections. it will protect you yes #but it will also cause MASSIVE blowback. bc if you lose the One Person... your life will fall apart. i know this personally. #i really recommend just trying to be... cautiously optimistic instead. like. yes #people can be horrible and cruel and there are some communities (incels for example) that aren't worth that optimism #but i think like... most people will hold a door for you . most people want to help you find your wallet . #i hope one day you are able to find peace. i hope that rage eventually smooths over. i know how hard it is PERSONALLY #and i know what must have happened to you. and im deeply deeply sorry we share the same wound. #but i promise - sometimes we all need someone else to help us carry the weight. eventually the rage has to die so that we can let help in #i had to spend years biting at outstretched hands. i still often do. im still very wary . and my heart breaks that you flinch too. #here's the thing: i don't blame you. but we were both acting out of fear and pain. .... not out of healthy behavior. and ... change #was needed. i needed change too. rage was useful for a while. then it just left me isolated and bitter. i had to (with effort) #choose to let that rage go. and let people in . VERY SLOWLY THO LOL

[carlsdraws]

the last remnants of [REDACTED]

#in stars and time #in stars and time spoilers #isat #isat siffrin #isat king #isat head housemaiden #isat euphrasie #euphrasies in there bc i’m making the assumption based on her knowledge of wishes and white hair ! #and also that’s very interesting to me #my art

[gnarlyimp]

i probably shouldn’t rant here but i don’t have anyone to talk to so

#there was a big storm earlier and the power has been out for two hours #i dont sleep until late 11-midnight bc i cant sleep through the night if i dont #and bc of the power outage the ac isnt on and its hot #and its dark and im scared #and i dont like sleeping in heat #as much as that makes me sound bratty its just my sensory issues i cant stand it :(( #my phones on 9 percent and the power isnt getting fixed until 11 #based on assumptions #i rlly hope it comes back on sooner than that im rlly scared #i love storms but that one was so bad #toby growls

[great-and-small]

I don’t know who “Brennen Lee Mulligan” is (google says comedian?) but based on the way his name is always invoked on specific personal posts of mine I am going to go ahead and theorize that he is…

1. passionate about birds

2. bad at identifying them

and while I deeply wish I could deny the second half of that assumption to myself, my weakness in gull identification suggests it is probably a fair comparison

#sorry if im wrong about this guy this assumption is literally based on how people tag his name on my posts lol #birds #brennan lee mulligan #don’t ask me to differentiate Franklins gull from laughing gull I will cry #and don’t even get me started on flycatchers

[labmousegirl]

are you disabled or suffer from other chronic conditions that often leave you bed bound? do you often feel like you’re in the “damn bitch you live like this?” meme because cleaning is too exhausting?

my protip is get yourself one of THESE bad boys and hang it by your bed

it’s an over the door shoe rack and the pockets are perfect for holding a lot of household objects.

you can use the pockets to store trash, snacks, meds, and water bottles. if you worry about hygiene, you can also keep some for dry shampoo, deodorant, body wipes, clean undergarments, or toothbrush materials. on good days, you can clean it out and restock it, or have someone else help you. on bad days, you won’t have to worry about getting food and you’ll be able to feel a little better about hygiene.

it’s also really great if you want to keep your hobbies close by!! i can often only work on my bed, and then i have to worry about putting everything away if i have to lay down. if it’s a hobby that has materials that can be stored in the pockets, it can feel more accessible to jump in and out of and take less spoons to set/clean up.

#spoonie #chronic illness #chronic pain #chronic fatigue #disability #tagging for exposure bc i want this tip to get out it helped me a lot #feel like shit today might as well share this tip so i feel sort of productive #worth mentioning i suffer from chronic illness and fatigue that they’re still testing (altho medicating under the assumption of narcolepsy) #but i have trouble sitting and standing for long periods so i spend a lot of time in bed and so whenever my bed gets gross i feel gross #so this is based on chronic fatigue mostly

[liquidstar]

this is not a comprehensive list

#in order from left to right (with explanations): #k on #(self explanatory. definition of moe.) #a place further than the universe #(theyre at least a little insane for going all the way to antarctica for funsies) #bocchi the rock #(good mix of insane and sweet. most of the insane parts come from bocchi herself) #nichijou #(literally so much happened all the time) #and asobi asobase #(they did do arson) #i haven't seen azumanga daioh or yuru camp and i never finished lucky star #but based on what i know abt the first two id put it... azumanga between bocchi and nichijou. and yuru camp with or after k on #and from what i remember abt lucky star its also just after k on #a bit quirkier but nothing ever really happens in it. as far as i watched. which is why i stopped watching LOL #but thats all assumptions and second hand knowledge so i figured i shouldnt actually include them unless i was SURE #i also thought abt putting asteroid in love in here too but that one is a bit more niche so i left it out #i also excluded any idol shows bc that feels like a different category. and would make this too long #sorry zombieland saga and love live.... #i also excluded straight up yuri. this is more abt Hanging Out than romance. but some is allowed as long as its not the focal point #like kita in btr. shes very yuri but the show isnt about that #you could probably also put is the order a rabbit on here but idr much from that. i think i watched like 3 episodes umm 100 years ago #i also thought abt putting the highschool girls segments from daily lives of highschool boys here. but they arent in most of the show #tho theyd probably go between nichijou and asobi asobase. or maybe on par w nichijou #that one girl did almost kill the other two with a rock as im sure youve all seen

[dumbbullet]

Thinking back to the interaction i had with my niece a few weeks ago.. local woman nearly throws hands with a 4 yr old over Blorbo from her childhood. (I did not try to fight my niece, but I did gently suggest that maybe Shadow needs to learn to communicate better?) Also apparently today was hourly comics day but I always forget when it is so this counts as my attempt to participate.

#Dumb doodles #Comic #hourly comics #artists on tumblr #shadow the hedgehog #Sticking to my trend of making a thing and shooting it into the void right before I go to sleep #I understand how she could make this assumption based on the 5 mins of screentime in prime and also being 4 #But I won't have my niece be a slanderer

[mugiwara--ya]

one piece fan starts thinking about the story's timeline 20 dead 500 injured

#based on my calculations and a handful of assumptions pre timeskip lasted around 8 months and the current year is 1523 #give me a fucking second i want to. i want to explain my thought process #i just gave myself a massive headache. help #sol.txt

[onlowandhigh]

It would be fucking hilarious if the Rat Grinders just like, have no actual ill intention towards the Bad Kids. Like what if the Bad Kids are all just majorly stressed out and paranoid and are projecting?

Also, the name switch n party member (supposed) death got me thinking: What if the Rat Grinders used to go on real adventures like the Bad Kids, and Lucy Frostblade was killed on one of those adventures? And after that traumatic event, the group switched tactics to the less dangerous rat grinding method to keep themselves safe while still passing their classes, because they didn’t want to loose anymore friends?

The Bad Kids have brought up multiple times this season how bullshit dangerous advertising is- and that’s true! So with that in mind, would it really be so odd that a group of CHILDREN try and do something safer?

#fantasy high #fantasy high: junior year #dimension 20 #the rat grinders #the bad kids #fantasy high junior year #just like- it really feels our intrepid hero’s are making some assumptions #based on vibes that aren’t necessarily there #lucy frostblade #kipperlilly copperkettle #oisin hakinvar #ivy embra #ruben hopclap #buddy dawn #mary ann skuttle #fhjy #d20 fhjy

[un-monstre]

So, I’ve said before that one of the reasons I like classic literature is that it helps me understand the culture of the times. Rereading Sherlock Holmes made me realize that Victorian-era phrenology didn’t go away, it just….got better PR.

#Anyway! If I see you make assumptions about people’s health/behavior/personality based on their appearance or body shape #I’m going to consider you a guillble motherfucker who hasn’t learned anything since 1881 #letters from watson #monstre.txt

[acowardinmordor]

Eddie mumbles something about how he's always wanted to try it and kisses Steve in the Upside Down because he figures he's gonna be dead in a minute, so its whatever. Tragically rolls a 1 on that plan. Crit fails his plan so hard that he ends up surviving what the doctors kept insisting should have been fatal blood loss.

Eventually, despite his requests to the nurses and to Wayne that he not have to see Steve, the guy manages to get through, late at night when the others were at home in bed.

Steve looks serious, forehead creasing, and awkward as hell. Uncomfortable. Eddie isn't an idiot, so he spotted Robin years ago. As close as those two are, Eddie knows that Steve must know about her, and must be cool with it. But its different when its not a lack of attraction, but an unwanted one.

Steve asks, tensely, with careful words, why Eddie kissed him, and what he meant when he said he always wanted to try it.

Eddie doesn't lie.

'I didn't want to die without ever kissing someone.'

'And... I was the only one around who wasn't 14.'

Steve exhales and his shoulders relax, and the only thing Eddie can label that as is relief. He doesn't ask any more questions, and he leaves Eddie alone for the most part, even after Eddie leaves the hospital. Whenever they're in the same place though - parties, hangouts, the kids - Eddie can feel him looking. He never catches him. Steve reacts too fast, but Eddie knows he's watching him. He tries, he forces himself to keep his comments fiercely platonic. Perfectly heterosexual. He's successful.

So is Steve. Eddie doesn't catch him staring, so Eddie never sees how Steve looks at him.

#steddie ficlet #idek man #I'm so tired #and was rereading Hold me now i need relief #and love soft misunderstandings #ones born of two people being afraid #and making totally reasonable assumptions based on the evidence they have

[commsroom]

as an extension of how hera reads as trans to me, hera/eiffel resonates with me specifically as a relationship between a trans woman and a cis man. loving hera requires eiffel to decentralize his own perspective in a way that ties into both his overall character arc and the themes of the show.

pop culture is baked into the dna of wolf 359, into eiffel’s worldview, and in how it builds off of a sci-fi savvy audience’s assumptions: common character types, plot beats, or dynamics, why would a real person behave this way? how would a real person react to that? eiffel is the “everyman” who assumes himself to be the default. hera is the “AI who is more human than a lot of humans,” but it doesn’t feel patronizing because it isn’t a learned or moral quality; she is a fundamentally human person who is routinely dehumanized and internalizes that.

eiffel/hera as a romance is compelling to me because there is a narrative precedent for some guy/AI or robot woman relationships in a way i think mirrors some attitudes about trans women: it’s a male power fantasy about a subclass of women, or it’s a cautionary tale, or it’s a deconstruction of a power fantasy that criticizes the way men treat women as subservient, as property. but what does that pop culture landscape mean in the context of desire? If you are a regular person, attracted to a regular person, who really does care for you and wants to do right by you, but is deeply saturated in these expectations? how do you navigate that?

I think that, in itself, is an aspect of communication worth exploring. sometimes you won’t get it. sometimes you can’t. and that’s not irreconcilable, either. it’s something wolf 359 is keenly aware of, and, crucially, always sides with hera on. eiffel screws up. he says insensitive things without meaning to. often, hera will call him out on it, and he will defer to her. in the one case where he notably doesn’t, the show calls attention to it and makes him reflect. it’s not a coincidence that the opening of shut up and listen has eiffel being particularly dismissive of hera - the microaggression of separating her from “men and women” and the insistence on using his preferred title over hers. there are things eiffel has just never considered before, and caring for hera the way he does means he has to consider them. he's never met someone like hera, but media has given him a lot of preconceptions about what people like her might be like.

there’s a whole other discussion to be had about the gender dynamics of wolf 359, even in the ways the show tries to avoid directly addressing them, and how sexual autonomy in particular can’t fully be disentangled from explorations of AI women. i don’t think eiffel fully recognizes what comments like “wind-up girl” imply, and the show is not prepared to reconcile with it, but it’s interesting to me. in the context of transness (and also considering hera’s disability, two things i think need to be discussed together), i think it’s worth discussing how hera’s self image is at odds with the way people perceive her, her disconnect from physicality, how she can’t be touched by conventional means, and the ways in which eiffel and hera manage to bridge that gap.

even the desire for embodiment, and the autonomy and type of intimacy that comes with it, means something different when it’s something she has to fight for, to acquire, to become accustomed to, rather than a circumstance of her birth. i suppose the reason i don’t care for half measures in discussions re: hera and embodiment is also because, to me, it is in many ways symbolically a discussion about medical transition, and the social fear of what’s “lost” in transition, whether or not those things were even desired in the first place.

hera’s relationship with eiffel is unquestionably the most supportive and equal one she has, but there are still privileges, freedoms, and abilities he has that she doesn’t, and he forgets that sometimes. he will never share her experiences, but he can choose to defer to her, to unlearn his pop culture biases and instead recognize the real person in front of him, and to use his own privilege as a shield to advocate for her. the point, to me - what’s meaningful about it - is that love isn’t about inherent understanding, it’s about willingness to listen, and to communicate. and that’s very much at the heart of the show.

#wolf 359 #w359 #doug eiffel #hera wolf 359 #hera w359 #eiffera #i still have a lot more to say about this honestly. but i hope this makes sense as an overview of my perspective. #with the caveat that i understand how personal trans headcanons are and whatever brings you comfort in that regard. i think is wonderful #but to me eiffel is one of the most cis men imaginable. and that's a big part of what he means to me in this context. #when i said some of this to beth @hephaestuscrew the other day they said. minkowski missteps in talking to hera based on #a real world assumption about AIs while eiffel missteps based on pop culture assumptions. and i think that's a meaningful distinction and #is something that resonates with me in this context as well

[goodtimeswithgrian]

look i know we all want our little guys to be in hermitcraft but maybe. maybe one of the new ones is not a guy.

#my personal extremely unpopular choice for a new HERmit: taneesha #based only on my assumptions because: i like her :) #also tango raided her streams several times. thats why i know her. you should check her out #anyway tell me about your niche mcyt women you'd like to see in the 3px wide arm render on the hermitcraft website #szad.txt

[mayasaura]

One thing that really stuck me about gender in Nona was the sexism in the teacher's perception of Pyrrha. She sees two young women living with someone she perceives as being male, and on learning they're not related, her immediate assumption is that Pyrrha is taking sexual advantage of them. How incredibly unfair that assumption is to Pyrrha, to assume this about her and to continue assuming this despite how clearly Nona adores her. What it implies about the broader setting that this was apparently a somewhat reasonable assumption to make, and that there are battered women's shelters for her to try to gently direct Camilla to. How starkly it throws into relief that this assumption has never once been made in the series before.

That's what really hit about the scene. This was the first time a perceived-male character had been assumed to be a sexual threat. It was the first time being a woman or a girl had carried an assumption of victimhood. I had already noticed that the Nine Houses seemed to lack any kind of gender-based hierarchy, and didn't show any signs of misogynistic gender roles, but it really struck me again in that moment how freeing it had been. To have had two whole books from the perspective of teenage girls with no concept of sexual violence. To have had a whole setting where those assumptions just didn't exist, and would never have occurred to anyone.

And I think that's one thing that really holds me back from agreeing that 'Nine Houses' = Bad and 'Not Nine Houses' = Good. The societies outside the Nine Houses are still the legacy of the billionaires who left the Earth to die. They're still capitalistic, they have plastic bags clogging their bays, and after ten thousand years, they still haven't been able to put down the misogyny juice. I don't think it was a mistake that this information about the setting was communicated the way it was, using this assumption about Pyrrha. The delivery cuts way too deliberately to the putrid heart of gender bias; where misogyny, misandry, and transphobia are all just different angles on the same damn thing. A total milf perfectly playing the part of loving and beloved father, but still assumed by observers to be a sexual predator. That's not a culture I want to champion.

#it's not even overtly transphobia because she straight up doesn't know Pyrrha's a woman #but it's based on the same set of assumptions as transmisogyny and transphobic just the same #the Houses aren't the good guys either ofc #when it comes to the occupation of New Rho they're clearly and objectively the bad guys #but I don't think one CULTURE can be elevated over the other as being objectively better #they both have their problems #the locked tomb #nona the ninth #ntn spoilers #pyrrha dve #transphobia cw #sexism cw

[uncanny-tranny]

The frustrating part about conversations like "should people with self-harm scars warn others before showing off their body?" and conversations like it is how nobody would tell me that my scars are obscene or should be hidden despite, literally, being self-harm scars. They just do not know because people literally do not know what self-harm scars are and what self-harm is.

Our bodies are not vulgar or gross. We deserve to live our lives, and if our scars make you uncomfortable, we can be compassionate about that, but that doesn't mean that our bodies are Bad and should be Locked Away. Treat us like we belong, because we do.

#mental health #mental health advocacy #self harm #self harm tw #sh tw #it's just funny seeing what people think self-harm is #because they wouldn't think twice about my scars but they would rain hellfire on somebody who has scars that LOOK like they're... #...the result of self-harm (even if they are not from it!) #people just run with the assumptions they have based off of like... pop media and sad songs and never from us #/especially/ if you are somebody who never self-harmed in the most 'conventional' or 'understood' way... #...i found that as somebody who fits that category nobody knows how to treat me... #...which tied into a different post i made about 'unconventional' self-harming bahaviour #and the idea that we should be hidden away like a broken doll just helps contribute to us not getting help or being able to recover... #...like part of the reason i have self-harmed is because i was told how my trans body was obscene in cis society... #...it was more complex than that but being told you are Fundamentally Broken and Bad is genuinely evil