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andi-o-geyser · 8 months

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a full SAGA of chaos choices at the diner in the centre of your mind

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inkskinned · 1 year

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it's been said before and i'm sure said better than i can phrase it. but really, really - if you like making "i'm going to kill myself" jokes, please try switching to being ironically conceited instead.

anytime something goes wrong, say things like "ah well at least i'm beautiful and charming and everyone loves me." when you forget something, try "my big huge brain is so smart and thinking about too many other very big wizardly thoughts you wouldn't even understand." when you're frustrated by one of your symptoms, start talking like you're in My Immortal. "Life has come for me but my eyes are beautiful pools of gorgeous fire and my hair is amazing. I stuck my middle finger up at life and told it to fuck off and it did."

just... try it for a month or two. try saying the most absurdly self-congratulatory shit you can think of.

i know it's tempting to make suicide or self-harm jokes. and for me at least, a decade ago (!) when someone suggested i stop making those kinds of jokes, i was kind of at a loss for what to replace them with. i wanted to make light of these moments, but genuinely (at the time) my first thought really was suicidal ideation. there was a part of me that even felt like ... i was kind of "making light" of that voice. that if i could say i want to die lol, it would help take the sting out of that genuine (albeit passive) desire. like i could turn my illness into a joke.

when i started complimenting myself instead, it felt awkward and stupid. it felt really, really ironic. what i was actually saying was nobody would ever think this stuff about me, that's what makes it so fucking funny.

but. the effect was immediate. first thing i noticed was the people around me. when i dropped a glass and said ah my skin is too beautiful and sleek the glass has swooned and broken for me, other people were suddenly overjoyed to jump in with the joke. rather than making an awkward moment, we'd both start cracking up. ah princess sleek hands, i've heard of you.

i was 19. i hadn't noticed i'd been making others tense when i said i want it all to end. i know now that it's incredibly hard to know how to walk that moment - do you talk to them about your concern? do you potentially make them uncomfortable by asking if they're okay? do you ignore the situation? do you help them pick up the glass, or do they need to do it by themselves? are they genuinely made suicidal over this small moment? and most importantly, how do you - without professional training or supplies - actually help?

most people want to help you pick up the glass in your life, they just have no fucking idea how to do it. they don't want to make anything worse. they don't want to make assumptions about you. they love you, they're scared for you - and being scared makes people kind of freeze up. it's not because they don't love you. it's because they do.

now when something bad happens, my first thought is how can i make a stupid joke about this. it isn't my brain saying you're a dumb fucking bitch. i spend more time laughing. i spend more time being gentle with myself. i spend more time feeling good.

and the thing is - what's kind of funny - is that you'd be surprised by how many people agree with you. the first time i said i'm too pretty to understand that, someone else said to be fair you're the prettiest person in this room. i promise - you really don't know how kindly your friends see you. but they love you for a reason. they sort of reverse-velveteen-rabbit you. your weird and ugly spots fade away and you just become... the love they want to give you.

go love yourself ironically. the worst thing that happens is that you end up tricking your reflection into actually loving you.

#something something toxic relationships notwithstanding #(re: the friends stuff)#most people love you. automatically. for being alive. like people are just MADE that way.#and the reason kms jokes don't always land is bc people fucking love you and are like - ahhh how do i help #let them help you!!!!!!

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theoldkyokodied · 7 months

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The Allegiance of the Ascended Vampire and the New God of Magic

#bloodweave #baldur's gate 3 #bg3 #gale x astarion #astarion x gale #gale dekarios #astarion ancunin #yes this is about astarion helping gale defeat mystra and take her place with the crown in exchange for gale helping him with the ritual #the ‘they can make each other worse’ part of their relationship turned to the max #I enjoy them being reluctantly soft for each other more but from time to time I just think about how powerful they could get together #toxic evil boyfriends. take love and twist it up until it’s unrecognisable #I like to think that astarion approached gale with that offer after realising no one else in camp is gonna help him #and that he can use gales own hunger for power which backfired when astarion actually became emotionally invested in gale #and after gale kept his word despite everyone’s concerns astarion changed his plan from not fullfilling his end of the bargain to actually #helping gale kill mystra (mostly so that gale could belong to him and him alone. and letting him take the place as a god bc having a god #at you beck and call is definitely appealing. especially one as eager to please as gale)#anyway what I want to say with this is please please please let me kill mystra i don’t even care if the weave gets destroyed again

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mroddmod · 7 days

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one of the very few to show the batch kindness back on kamino

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spiderversegf · 1 year

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one important thing that Must be understood about interpersonal relationships is that you have to stop interacting with people who love you like they’re one slip-up away from leaving you. you have to trust that the ppl you love mean what they say. you have to believe that when they say “this hurt my feelings,” that they’re also saying, “can you please love me this other way next time?” and you have to wrap your head around the fact that even if you don’t understand Why someone loves you, you can accept that that they do. true, honest, & open love does not function like hp in a video game !!!!!!

#🍜#wish i could remember this more. trying to rmr that when ppl are honest w ways they are hurt it’s bc they love me enough to be honest ab it #i am not perfect. but i can do my best to love people well and to apologize when i mess up #i do not have to punish myself! i can apologize and do better in the future #the love i feel increases when people tell me how to love them. the love i feel increases when people tell me how to love them. the love i-#sueñito tag

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dulciechi · 9 months

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Went to Google this fr after the game, and died when I saw how many people did the same thing 💀

Bonus!

Tbh, I made this so I could have an excuse to infiltrate the fandom and beg for more content 🥺 I’m going feral

Pls pls someone link me to more Narilamb blogs to follow 😭 It’s ok if they’re no longer active— I wanna see the old stuff too. I keep reaching the end of the Tumblr tags 🥲 Also, is there a Discord server for these two? 👉👈

also also, is “true devotion” another ship name for them?

#cult of the lamb #narilamb #cotl #narinder x lamb #cotl fanart #cotl the lamb #cotl narinder #cotl art #i hope you like the wedding clothes bc i LOVED making them #my art

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pangur-and-grim · 17 days

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HELLO, welcome to the kitten gacha game!

here's how it works: all pointed cats are born white and mysterious. that's because pointing is temperature dependent, and cats are baked at an even temperature in the womb! as they age, their colder extremities develop colour

a while ago, I received photos of three pointed kittens, and had to guess where they fell on this chart based on subtle clues:

I ended up choosing a grub who developed into a seal point with white (my sweet Belphegor!)

and now I'm giving YOU the chance to choose! kittens A, B and C will each become one of the colours on the chart as they are manufactured age.

reserve them now at greerstothers.shop, and receive your enamel pin grown kitten in the mail!

(close-ups of the clues under the readmore)

feel free to guess their colourations in the replies/reblogs! I'm curious to see how many people get it right.

the enamel pins will come with a breakdown of their colour genetics on the backing card!

#I hope people like this bc I am going full autism #love cats 😤 love genetics 😤 love cat colour genetics 😤#I spent ages on the final enamel pins to make them look as bullied as possible #huge wet kitten eyes etc

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ladybeug · 4 months

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So a while ago I was talking to @anna-scribbles and @marimbles about adrien and gender (as you do), and as a part of that conversation we said... hey do you remember that jenna marbles video where she put rhinestones all over her face?

and then, tangentially... do you remember that one clown makeup vine?

hold on i'm going somewhere with this:

We got to where I was going. but i'm still driving:

#ive had these comics in my drafts for so long and kept not posting them bc they start on such an incomprehensible note #for me personally that 'actually i AM busy' vine is iconic but i dont think thats true for everyone #watch that jenna marbles video its the first one i ever watched and i love her #my art #miraculous ladybug #comics

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spoopy-arcade · 9 months

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More Ruin stuff bc it "RUINED" my life !!!!!!!!!!!!! (affectionate)

#and by more ruin stuff I mean more roxy and cassie <3333 #BC I LOVE THEM SO MUCHHHHHHH #EXPLODES #fnaf security breach #fnaf sb #fnaf ruin dlc #fnaf ruin #ruin dlc #fnaf #fanart #my art #digital art #roxanne wolf #cassie #glamrock freddy #gregory #ruin dlc spoilers #artists on tumblr #fnaf fanart

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rileyclaw · 1 year

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bunch of silly doodles of these guys from the past week or so

#sorry but i have a lot of love and the only way i know how to show it is to put these kids in situations. horrifying OR silly.#especially silly bc im silly and it's what i want to see.#watch my art style change subtly each time bc i can never commit #the owl house #toh #emerald trio #gus porter #willow park #hunter noceda #hunter toh #my art #my fav is the one where shes chasing them up the steps #fanart #the owl house season 3

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inkskinned · 5 months

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in internet posts it is easy to cut them out of your life. they are hurting you! they aren't listening to you!

they held your hair back. they lent you lipstick. they held your hand at the train station and got you home safe. they rounded on your bully, got loud, said get fucked, spitting-mad in your defense.

they also cut the hair off again. told you that you should really think twice before wearing something like that. took you for granted. took your insecurities and threw them in your face again.

you know logically it should be easy. all the internet advice comments always read it will feel better. like an equation - if a person is rotten, you just remove them. you pull the tooth that's hurting.

but it was never a big flare-up moment. you don't live in a sitcom. they never tried to take your boyfriend or steal from your apartment. they showed up to birthdays and they wrote songs about you and bring you water without you asking. once you found out they carry an emergency inhaler for you, even though you haven't had an asthma attack in years - just in case.

where is the line? people fuck up. sometimes they fuck up badly. sometimes people have raw personalities, like a powerline, and being around them is dangerous. addicting. sometimes they can't help themselves, but you know they're trying. sometimes they are just rough-around-the-edges. sometimes they don't even realize how they sounded when they said that. sometimes it's just - you've both loved each other for so long now, the way this thing hurts goes back to the root.

and that's the fucked up part. you have pushed your fingers against the sweetheart of memory. things these days are electric, tense, harrowing. they didn't used to be. there were a lot of good days in there. sometimes you want to just close your eyes and say can this be over yet? do we still need to be fighting?

doing that would give up any chance you get of getting an apology, but you don't always know that you need an apology, you love them. once they flaked on your birthday party. once they told you to get over it, people are always dying. they also let you crash on their couch for a week after the breakup, handfeeding you when you were so sad you couldn't eat. they are also judgmental about everything, occasionally react to banal statements with an attitude that is weird and fiery. they also love you like a lighthouse sometimes, so strong they cut the storm like lightning.

but the problem is that you might be storm. you might be the thing that needs breaking. what if you are two forces who are desperately, horribly drawn to each other, shaped by the other person's passions, and both good for each other and bad in equal measure.

what if you're both just people, and you're no saint neither.

just cut them off! swallowing the saltwater, you catch yourself in the mirror. you've been shaking more than usual. there's an ache in you that is oblique, loud, impossible to soothe. is this what it looks like? when life is "easier"?

your mouth will always have a hole, is the thing, if you remove the tooth.

#spilled ink #warm up #writeblr #this is about someone specific but feel free to blorbo on main.#tbh this is familial for me so that is an element but it's also about childhood best friends #and probably about ur enemies to lovers blorbo #(but i want to specifically say if ur partner is like this. not necessarily a good partnership lol.)#(the dynamics at play in familial/friend relationships feel equally important and in some ways are HARDER to escape.#bc we can see that this is a potentially toxic romantic foundation.#but in family ? ...... it's toxic and it doesn't stop u from loving them. bc u always have.#and i think that makes it harder. by a lot. which is what this is referencing).#but genuinely and really truly forever feel free to tag ur potentially toxic enemies to lovers on this and all my poetry #here i'll do one for u - adora & catra :x

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cosmosnout · 2 months

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