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bess3714 · 19 days

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If I were in charge of DC here's what I would do to the Batfam comics in no particular order:

Batman and Robin:

I would send Bruce and Damian on a sabbatical/road trip across America. They of course keep running into crimes wherever they go and solve them, leading a couple of FBI agents to start investigating them for committing the crimes. One FBI agent will remind people of a chihuahua, and the other of a St. Bernard. Also Damian has his permit so he can drive, and since Bruce currently doesn't have a hand in comics I'd add in a plotline where they help an alien who grows back his hand as a reward but he does it wrong and now Bruce has an extra finger.

Batman:

With Bruce and Damian gone, I'd make Tim Batman and Stephanie Robin. They fight crime and bicker like old ex's, leading to some interesting rumors about Batman. I'd make a directive that Tim isn't allowed to be drawn as a twink anymore, but has to be drawn with the rippling muscles he had in the 90's and 00's. Stephanie also gets rippling muscles. Part of the b plot for a while is Stephanie's rivalry with her next-door-neighbor who turns out to be a drug lord, but the drugs he sells are like, insulin and ADHD meds that he and his gang steals because he's a doctor who lost his job for reporting some ethics concerns and now he's mad about the medical system. Stephanie gets mad because in hindsight all the clues were there that he was literally in a gang, and she didn't notice because she thought he was just an asshole. Also they definitely make out at one point.

Detective Comics:

I love what Ram V is doing right now but I think when he's done I'd put Duke Thomas in the main story investigating systemic corruption in Gotham, shining a light (because he's the Signal) on the worst parts of the government. At some point he's accused of murder and the police are all trying to arrest him so he blows up some cop cars and Batman calls to yell at him but he hangs up on Batman. Montoya has a dartboard in her office with a picture of his face on it.

I'd add in an ongoing run of a comic that resembles the original batman comics in style and content. Then I'd have a a bunch of stories with some lesser-known characters, like the Psyba-Rats. I'd really use Tec as a playground to experiment with unusual team-ups, fresh stories, and inventive artstyles.

Birds of Prey:

I like the current lineup but there needs to be 30% more queerbaiting between Barbara and Dinah. There's an issue where Barbara and Dinah pretend to be lesbians to get this himbo to leave Dinah alone because she's trying to let him down easy because he's so damn nice she doesn't want to hurt him. (Has anyone watched Rizzoli and Isles, coincidentally?) I'd also add Helena Bertinelli to the team but she has an eyepatch for inexplicable reasons (the reason is it looks cool). The eyepatch will be dropped without any recognition a few issues later. Barbara drops both Batgirl and Oracle and gets a new identity as the Cloud. Only the Birds of Prey know it's her; everyone else thinks the Cloud may or may not be an evil AI working for Lex Luthor.

Outsiders:

I'm not reading Outsiders so I can't really comment on what I'd do for that one, but if you guys have any ideas let me know and I'll do the opposite, inciting fan fury and starting a Twitter war.

Nightwing:

I would send Dick to live in New York and also I would make him broke and homeless. I thought about making him lose his memory too, but that's already been done so instead I'd give him violent visions of murder and assault so he thinks he's losing his mind but then it turns out to be a secret policy from the new mayor of New York City to quietly round up all the homeless people by releasing gas into the streets at night to knock them out, but Dick has had too much exposure to drugs and poisons for it to work right on him, so instead he gets hallucinations!

Batgirl:

That's right, you'd get a Batgirl ongoing from me! Cassandra Cain would be the main character, and in the first arc I'd have her join a dating app, but then every date she goes on turns out to be with a criminal who she then sends to jail, and just when she's about to give up on dating, on the very last date she goes on the guy tries to force a charter pilot to help him escape by plane but Cass takes him down and the pilot is like "so that was cool. Can I get your number?" and they start dating. After that Cass accidentally joins a gang but she keeps getting gang members sent to jail and no one suspects it's her, only at some point she actually becomes the gang leader. There's then a crossover with Batman where her gang beefs with Stephanie's next-door-neighbor's gang and Cass ends up giving her gang to him peacefully.

Batwoman:

While I'm at it, I'd launch a Batwoman comic. I'd get Chuck Dixon to write it and it would be both wildly homophobic and also the gayest thing you'd ever seen, but eventually ol' Chuck and I would have some creative differences and he would depart, and instead we would have a rotating cast of guest authors. I don't really know much about Batwoman but luckily knowing about a character in order to write them isn't a requirement at DC. I think we need some ghosts so there would be an arc about Batwoman getting haunted by a bunch of angry, vengeful spirits who she thinks are trying to kill her but who are actually trying to lead to their killer. One of the ghosts is a really hot woman and they share a passionate kiss before the ghost girl disappears after Kate gets them justice. The arc would be lauded in some articles as a 'major reversal of the bury your gays trope' because at one point Kate has to dig up their bodies to look for clues, while in other news outlets it would be decried as a 'vile depiction of the desecration of queer final resting places.'

Red Hood and the Outlaws:

Jason starts a club/gym for a group of teenagers where he teaches them cool stuff like 'how to throw a punch' but also 'how to buy and cook groceries'. The gym is threatened by various forces like gangs, developers, the city government, plus the kids all have personal problems they have to deal with, like mental and physical disabilities, generational trauma, homelessness, and poverty. The teenagers call the gym "The Saloon" and themselves "The Outlaws" because Jason always has a TV playing reruns of old western shows. There's a running joke where various people think Jason looks like a dead relative.

Poison Ivy:

I'm a few issues behind but this one I would leave alone. I don't think I could improve on it. Unless I made Janet from HR and Croc an item. That could be fun.

Harley Quinn:

Another one I'm not reading so I don't know what's going on there but it could be fun to have a crossover storyline with Poison Ivy where they grow and sell shrooms to rich college students and then influence them to do stupid stuff and get them arrested. You know, fun date night activities!

Conclusion:

My time in charge of Batman comics would be one of mass outrage and general fervor. My directives would be so unpopular amongst fans that petitions would be started to have me removed and violent death threats towards me would be de rigueur online. I would depart after a few short months and my replacement would almost immediately retcon all my creative decisions away into a dark universe that would then be blown up by Lex Luthor. Ten years later, a dedicated fanbase for the comics produced under me would emerge, and they would be so loud and annoying and insistent that fans would then clamor to get me back in charge of DC once again, but unfortunately by then I will have retired to start drama on Twitter and write a memoir after a failed attempt at starting my own comics company called Big M Comics and getting sued by McDonald's

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oldmannapping · 7 months

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HC Batfam sexualities. NSFW.

Note: I’m aging everyone up for this. Damian’s 17. Not gonna put a label on a 9 year old.

Bruce: Considers himself straight.

Considers any non-straight feelings or experiences he’s ever had as “interesting” and adds them to his personal file on himself.

Ardent believer in the Kinsey scale as a literal measurement tool and takes the test every 18 months to monitor any sexuality fluctuations so they aren’t an unknown variable that might impact his Batmanning.

Dick: Apologetically straight.

Aware of his huge LGBTQIA+ following as Nightwing (and to a lesser extent, as socialite Dick Grayson). Passionate supporter of LGBT+ rights and vocal patron of many charities and organisations.

Experimented thoroughly during his teen years and regrets some unfortunate paparazzi pictures taken during that time, as he worries that he was inadvertently queer-baiting with his public persona.

Loves love, loves to see it, accepts everyone. Oldest-child guilt for not being queer because he doesn’t want to disappoint anyone.

Told Bruce to stop making them all do the Kinsey scale because it’s creepy and invasive.

Jason: Doesn’t think about it.

Is pretty sure he’s straight, but has definitely had at least mild crushes on a few male figures in his life and in the media over the years. Has jerked off thinking about guys but never analysed it.

Sex isn’t his priority but he meets his needs when he has to, same as eating and sleeping.

Feels anger more than lust. Sees people as threats or targets more than sexual beings. Gets in his own head about the injustices of the world and doesn’t realise he has an unrelated boner.

Duke: Identifies as straight.

Has dated a trans girl, would be open to dating non-binary people, considers himself straight because he’s not into labels and considers trans women real women with no asterisks.

Romantic to his own detriment. Can come on too hard and fall too easily.

Can’t jerk off to someone he has a crush on in real life because he thinks it’s creepy.

Tim: Memorised every single sexuality definition and read seven books before settling on bisexual.

Thinks the Kinsey scale is outdated and irrelevant. Drafting a 350-question sexuality spectrum test for Bruce to use instead. Will recommend its implementation twice a year.

Forgets to think about sex until something minor triggers it and then he can’t focus on anything else. Obsessive.

Overthinks sexual encounters and is highly likely to read - and take the advice of - Cosmo sex tips. Bernard got him listening to Savage Love which was much more helpful for their relationship.

Steph: Has privately identified as queer for years but never bothered coming out.

Had some revelatory experiences with other women. Generally prefers men but her best orgasm was with a woman.

Owns an impressive and practical range of vibrators. Always packs one in her go-bag for missions, next to mace and her spare lockpick.

Is deeply glad she never slept with Tim because she thinks he’d overthink it and it would have been awkward, and made their friendship weird.

Damian: Thinks of himself as “currently straight”.

Likes to stand out for his skills and superior bloodline, not for his position outside mainstream social norms.

Doesn’t care about fitting in but doesn’t want to announce his sexuality in a crass way like Drake.

Is giving himself until he’s 21 to discover if he’s not straight. Refuses to engage with Dick or Bruce on “birds and the bees” talks. Put a sword through his tablet when Bruce sent him the Kinsey scale when he turned 16.

Cass: Lesbiconic. Steph coined the term and Cass loves it.

Lesbian. Never questioned it. It never mattered because her body was a weapon, not designed for pleasure.

Has three vibrators, two from Steph and one from Harper, that she hasn’t used yet but has inspected thoroughly.

Not interested in dating but will hook up with people so discretely that you won’t even realise she’s left the room.

Efficient at sex. Learning to not be overwhelmed by body language cues. Meditation is helping.

Alfred: Goes buck wild on cruises twice a year. Usually tells Bruce he’s visiting family in England.

Has seduced many married women away from their husbands, and charmed the husbands into shaking his hand afterwards.

Too powerful.

The world is lucky he prefers to remain in the shadows.

Considers labels a curious thing. Has primarily slept with women but would do what he had to for the mission.

Thinks Bruce and his Kinsey scale are adorably naive.

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dcsnextgaycharacter · 4 months

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Not a full list but can people send me panels they would like to see for any ship below, need to outsource help (Hank ships are in here but I don't need help with those, I am using Green Lantern/Sentinel: Heart of Darkness panels for HankTodd):

Hal/Ollie JayRoy HankTodd Match/Inertia Dick/Joey Joe Morgan/Al Pratt Bart Allen/Preston Lindsay Riddler/Scarecrow Jason Blood/Bruce Wayne Dinah/Helena Clark Kent/John Henry Irons Clark/Lex DinahOllieHal Mister Mind/The Joker Tiger/Dick Chastantine Rose/Cassie Edwin Payne/Charles Rowland Diana/Kate Kane Constantine/Lucifer Cassandra Cain/Rose Wilson Helena/Renee Sandman/Corinthian Jay Garrick/Alan Scott/Richard Swift Linda Park/Wally West/Hartley Rathaway The Shade/Jack Knight Richard Swift/Charles McNider BerKon Renee/Scandal Wally/Kyle Riddler/Penguin Hal/Earth Villains Lois Lane/Selina Kyle Ollie Queen/Eddie Fyers Plastic Man/Vic Sage Halowog Cosmic Boy/Lightning Lord Coldflash Maps Mizoguchi/Gold Beetle Nightwing/Catman Black Canary/Lady Shiva Tatsu Yamashiro/Selina Kyle Mr Freeze/Bruce Wayne Vixen/Wonder Woman Superbat Barbara/Kara Wally West/Pied Piper Max Lord/Booster Gold Harper Row/Punchline Brainiac 5/Superman Batjokes Riddlebat Jon Kent/Ash Damian/Jay Cir El/Natasha Irons/Traci 13 HalJohn HalGuy HalKyle HalAlan Beth/Yolanda HankCam Bluepulse

Sandwave Batlantern Brainiac 5/Invisible Kid DickGarth Lightray/Orion Catman/Deadshot Donna/Starfire TimKon MidDickPollo Wonder Woman/Circe Lee Travis/Wesley Dodds/Dian Belmont Boostle Todd/Kaldur Dinahbabs Bruharv Konbart BeaTora Anita Fite/Traci 13 JonDami CissieCassie Ghostbat TimJon StephCass Supercorp Dick/Wally Virgil Hawkins/Richie Foley Courtney/Emiko Talia Kane/Laurel Kent Isamot Kol/Vath Sarn Pied Piper/Trickster Two-face/Riddler Wonder Woman/Cheetah SinHal Tim/Lonnie Birds of Prey Polycule GuyJohn AnitaCissie StephMia TimBerBartKon DinahZatanna CarolDiana JessKori DickRoy BruceOllie GuyDick Bernard Dowd/Jay Nakamura Karen Starr/Helena Wayne Halbarry BruceConstantine Young Justice Polycule Lois/Diana Lex Luthor/Braniac Max Lord/Ted Kord Jessica Cruz/Soranik Natu Lex Luthor/Will Magnus Pre N52 Kara Zor El and Stephanie Brown Steph/Mia Mia/Cissie Alan Scott/Jay Garrick Selina Kyle/Talia Al Ghul Gotham City Sirens Polycule Kyle/Connor

#dc #dcu #dc comics #timkon #birdflash #batlantern #superbat #halbarry #green lantern #justice society of america #jayalan #batfam

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fantastic-nonsense · 5 months

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Now that we're a few months on from Batgirls ending, and with solicits out for the next few months, how are you feeling about where they're situated within DC right now?

(With the possible exception of Babs. I suspect I know exactly how you feel about Babs, because I feel very similar. About how she's situated in DC. right now.)

My short answer for how DC is treating the Batgirls right now is "much better than where they were in 2020 but significantly worse than where they should be, especially compared to all of the Robins."

In order, I think Cassandra is (ironically, considering the history there) being treated the best, being given the meatiest stories, and being utilized in ways that actually showcase her motivations and skillset. She co-starred in Spirit World, is a major supporting character in Ram V's Detective Comics run, and is now co-starring in Birds of Prey. Her pre-reboot history and characterization has basically been completely restored (except for that awful era we Do Not Talk About™, which. good.) and we have a concrete and tangible narrative direction for her again. Frankly, it's absolutely wild to be a Cass fan in 2023 seeing how she's being treated right now after 15+ years of some of the worst character treatment imaginable.

Barbara is in a very distant second place largely because of the implied elephant in the room (Tom Taylor's usage of her in the Nightwing book, the ableism, and DC's stubborn refusal to commit to letting her be Oracle full-time again). I'm also still....very frustrated and upset by Kelly Thompson's decision to relaunch Birds of Prey without her given that Babs has headlined BOP since the very beginning, in every iteration of the team, and the team would not exist without her. However, I do have to note that she's once again being showcased as a fully grown adult woman, is being regularly featured in comics, and is being utilized as Oracle in books like Ram V's Tec run, so there's potential there despite no one at DC seemingly being very interested in doing anything substantial with her beyond letting her be "Dick's computer geek girlfriend."

Which ultimately puts her above Stephanie...who basically isn't appearing anywhere significant now that Batgirls has ended and she's not dating Tim anymore. Which is...not great, to put it mildly. If you ask me why that's happened, it's because Steph has spent the majority of her appearances since her reintroduction back in 2014 being treated as "Tim's girlfriend" rather than her own character with her own wants, goals, and potential storylines. So where does she go now that Tim's dating Bernard? I don't know, but none of the writers at DC seem very interested in doing anything with her right now.

This treatment is of course very much in contrast to every single male Robin and ex-Robin character...where everyone except Tim (whose dedicated solo ongoing just finished) will either have active solo ongoings (Dick, Damian) or a solo mini (Jason) running as of February 2024. The difference in treatment is stark...but of course, that's nothing new to fans of the Batfam women. At least Kate is getting some chance to shine over in Outsiders, I guess, however poorly titled the book is.

#asks #dc comics #dc fanwank #barbara gordon #cassandra cain #stephanie brown #don't even get me started on helena. Ram V (the man. the myth. the legend) is the only one using her & she may as well not exist otherwise

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bothoutsiders · 9 months

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I have a request UwU can you please write something Jaytim but with Bernard as the bad guy in the story? Maybe some jealousy or stalking, it doesn't have to be extreme if you don't wanna I very rarely see bernard as the bad guy in fics, if I see it at all, and I have a bit of a craving for it :c pls ignore this if its not something you like! 🥺🥺🥺🥺

hey anon, i wrote something and i'm not sure if this will be of your liking. i have zero experience making someone the bad toxic person, but i did try it and i had a lot of fun. thank you for your request!!

“Baby bird, I thought you would never call.” The voice sounded muffled behind the helmet and even then, Bernard thought it wasn’t his real voice.

He tilted his head a bit to the side observing Red Hood. He was way taller than Tim, thus taller than him too. His muscles were impressive and seeing the guns on his sides, he knew he was also deadly. There was a stain of blood on his right thigh and Bernard wondered if it belonged to the vigilante or to someone else.

Red Hood was nothing but bad news. Bernard had googled him before. It seemed that Nightwing was popular even among the bad guys but Red Hood?... People always got killed when he was involved and he was sure that from all those bat people, he was the most dangerous one.

“Why is he calling you that?” He knew he shouldn’t be surprising a vigilante like that, but it bothered him how Red Hood seemed so close to his Tim. Just then he remembered the promise he made to Tim. Not to interfere. Not to speak, to pretend he wasn’t there, but he just couldn’t let it happen. He couldn’t ignore it.

Things began to move in slow motion as Red Hood looked in his direction. It was probably the fear making Bernard perceive time differently as two guns were cocked and pointed at him.

“Wait!” Tim immediately got between them. “Don’t shoot, don’t shoot!”

Bernard swallowed, feeling his body tense and alert, the back of his neck ice cold. He knew how to fight but this was completely different. He wouldn’t admit that standing close to Red Hood made him feel small and threatened.

“Who is he?” There was a pause coming from Red Hood, his tone wasn’t playful or happy anymore. “You know you can’t bring civilians to things like these.”

“Things like these?” Bernard asked, a light frown on his face. “Why is that? What do you two have to hide?”

Tim sighed as he looked at him, and behind him, he could see Red Hood staring too.

“Are you picking a fight, kid?”

“I don’t like the way he speaks to you,” Bernard said the same night after they were at his place. “He was obviously making a pass at you.”

It was clear on Tim’s face that he was more than tired of this. While their relationship had started as something new, exciting and more comfortable than any other romantic relationship he had ever had… this wasn’t what he expected from it.

After a few months of dating it turned into something overwhelming and completely different.

“He wasn’t. That’s how he likes to tease others.” He sat leaned to the side, away from Bernard even if both were on the same couch watching tv. “If you react to it, he does it more.”

“Tim,” he placed a hand on his thigh. “You know I care about you, I love you, and I won’t tell you to stop being a vigilante if this is what you like but… I don’t feel comfortable when you go to him.” There was a smile on his face, trying his best to be kind with his words and not to make Tim snap. He knew how Tim reacts when he’s tired or under a lot of pressure.

“You can trust me, Bernard. Nothing is going to happen. He is just… that way. He doesn’t interact with many people so he can be a bit weird.”

“Is not that he’s weird and was flirting with you, it’s that he is dangerous. Did you see how he was about to shoot me? If it wasn’t because of you–”

“You surprised him. I told you not to speak or even move, you were to pretend to not be there. I shouldn’t be taking you with me when I’m Red Robin and I still did because you begged me to. It was wrong of me.” Tim shook his head.

“Fine, but he is still dangerous. He kills people, Tim. Why don’t you let someone else deal with him? If you need something from him, maybe contact someone else that will do it for you.”

“... You’re asking me to stop seeing him because you don’t like him?”

“Yes, but not because I don’t like him. He’s dangerous.”

Tim got quiet for a moment and turned his whole body to look at him, as he rested his cheek against a cushion. “Bernard… It’s complicated with Red Hood. He doesn’t have a good relationship with Batman and the rest.”

“No surprise.” He smiled and caressed Tim’s hand. “I know you might be doing it out of pity, Tim, but he’s not your responsibility. He isn’t a big stray dog with bombs attached to him that you found and that you need to take care of. If he was in the streets then maybe he’s there for a reason?”

While his relationship with Jason didn’t start with the right foot, it didn’t mean that he was still on bad terms with him. On the contrary, they were close, and whenever they would fight together, it seemed that they had been doing it together for years. They were so synchronized that it even surprised them.

“Bernard, you’re important to me, I do love you but I can’t sacrifice my friendship with Red Hood because you don’t like it. If we need to get more information or if something happens, he will never get in contact with Batman or even make a deal with him. They don’t get along, I’m the only one Red Hood trusts.” He rubbed his eyes. “I’ll have to ask you to trust me. Nothing bad has ever happened and even if you think he might be a savage, he really isn’t.”

Things didn’t go that well after. There were days that Tim firmly believed that Bernard was completely jealous. That time in which Tim got a message from Jason with a dumb sticker that made him laugh, set some kind of alarm in Bernard’s head.

“It’s him, isn’t he? Does he even know we are together?”

Tim began to suspect it was was some kind of manipulation. Tim had gone through a lot of things and met so many different people. He knew about manipulation when he saw it, and this definitely felt like it.

“This is what happens when you’re trying to be brave. You should’ve let me kill them.”

There were noises coming from the window, they dropped something on their way in and then Tim stumbled. When Bernard took a look, he felt his blood boil.

Red Hood was holding Tim from under the arm, making his boyfriend lean on him and he couldn’t stand it.

They have spoken about the vigilante job and while Bernard was okay with it and even thought it was pretty cool, seeing Tim with someone strong and on the same field made him angry. It wasn't only Red Hood the one that made Bernard jealous, he also got irritated with Kon and Cassie. Especially Kon.

"Don’t touch him!”

The sudden voice made both of them look up, frozen in place.

“I told you I didn’t want to see you with him again. Why can’t you just do that little thing for me, Tim?!”

Tim was about to speak but Red Hood interrupted.

“I’ve been very patient with you.” It sounded more like a growl than just a threatening voice. “The only reason why I haven’t done anything is because Tim wouldn’t like it.” He made sure that Tim was leaning all his weight on him and carefully took him to the couch, sitting him down. “If I stopped touching him when you told me, I would’ve dropped him on the floor like a bag of potatoes. You’re his boyfriend, can’t you see he’s wounded?”

Bernard looked up at Tim and then he saw it. He saw the many wounds, the dried and fresh blood and how he was leaning forward to remove his shoes and massage his foot.

“Well, this is because of you. If you weren’t with him, he wouldn’t have come home like this. You are the one who kills people, you are always surrounded by worse criminals. You’re exposing him!”

There was a moment where Red Hood didn’t say a word, and Tim knew what it meant. He was doubting himself.

“Bernard… I need you to stop. What if you go home tonight? I’ll call you tomorrow.” He said removing what was left of his domino mask.

“Of course I’m not leaving. I’m not going to leave you alone with this… This animal!”

“Bernard, please.” He closed his eyes. The headache he had was killing him.

“Tim, please. We have talked about this before. Tell your friend to leave, I’ll take care of you.”

There was a small sigh coming from Red Hood. Something that no one would notice unless they’ve spent a lot of time with him and recognized the small details. He was about to stand up when Tim placed his hand on Red Hood’s knee.

“Stay.”

“Stay? Tim, he can’t be here.”

“You can’t be here, Bernard. You don’t understand and you are only making things worse." The throbbing on his temples only got worse. "I only want to disinfect my wounds and sleep for two days. You’ve been doing this for weeks now. I know what you want but I can’t give it to you. I’m sorry.”

“It’s him or me.”

Black spots were clouding his sight.

“Bernard. Close the door when you leave.” He closed his eyes and leaned back on the couch, massaging his temples. He couldn't stand it anymore.

He didn’t see Bernard leave but he heard him slamming the door when he left.

Red Hood didn’t say a word as he began to help Tim with his clothes, making sure nothing was touching directly his open wounds. He then left, only to be back a few moments later with something.

Tim didn't open his eyes, he knew by now that he needed to take a pill for the pain or he wasn't going to be able to fall asleep, even if he was exhausted.

He felt how his wounds were being taken care of. The few whimpers that escaped his lips found solace on a couple of "it's okay, baby bird", "you're doing good, pretty", "the last one, promise". His voice was gentle and Tim wasn't going to pretend he didn't like it when Hood spoke that way to him.

"He was lying." Tim said and felt how Red Hood paused on what he was doing.

"On what, exactly?"

"Being with you doesn't expose me to worse criminals. I think we make a pretty good team." He said proudly as he opened his eyes, only to find Jason looking back at him. He completely forgot how beautiful Jason's eyes were.

"Well…"

"You're stuck with me, Jason. We are a team. If you try to get rid of me, I'll just keep coming back."

"That's not something your boyfriend will like. You have a lot to explain to him."

Tim rolled his eyes before closing them again. "I'm single again. Now bring me something for the pain, please."

#JayTim #Jason Todd #Tim Drake #w: story #“bring something for the pain” can be emotional or physical you choose #request

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15minlatewithbatbucks · 1 year

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Bernard helping Tim with his hero name like

B: So, is Red Robin your final form? Like Nightwing or Batman?

T: Uh, Batman has always been Batman. Nightwing still freelances.

B: Oh?

T: But Red Robin wasn't mine, really. I want something that's mine.

Steph, who they thought was asleep on the bean bags: Yeah and Dick told him he has to grow up sometime.

T: Shut up.

B: Oh, a push the baby bird out of the nest situation?

S: You have no idea.

T: Go home, Stephanie.

S: You go home, Timberly. You don't even live here anymore.

B: So what are the options?

T: Well it's hard to not plagiarize these days. Um, maybe Cardinal?

B: Oh, what about an owl theme? They're supposed to be really intelligent.

S: Ah-

T: Sorry, no. That niche is already...

S: It's a whole thing, a whole Court really.

B: (taking mental notes to come back to that) Okay, maybe going with the emo theme. Blackbird?

T: That might make things confusing with a Black Bat and a Blackbird. I don't know. I don't want to step on Cass's toes.

S: She could handle it, she's a dancer.

T: Who invited you, even.

B: Okay, forget the birds and bats. You know what else flies?

S: What?

T: (seeing the thought train as it's derailing, but helpless to stop it) Bernard...

B: Moths.

T: You mean-

B: You could be the Mothman.

#bernard dowd #tim drake #timbern #stephanie brown #none of this is serious #none of these teenagers have a single braincell or even a place where one would go #i for one would welcome mothman tim

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qcomicsy · 1 year

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Batfam members on a scale of how able they are on rolling a blunt.

Alfred Penyworth

He was a spy. There's nothing he doesn't know how to do.

Harley 11/10

Her wife is plant based. And she probably learned on college, she's a medical major they're all either stoners or coke addicts.

She also has a power trip about rolling for hot people, it's how she flirts. Used to roll for Joker and she's is bitter about it until this day.

Tim Drake 10/10

With the amount of stress this poor soul had to endure in his 17 years of living on this godforsaken earth, there isn't NO WAY he's not a stoner. Probably Kon/Bernard/Steph was the one who taught him. I'm voting Bernard because they met eachother in highschool and 2000's bernard looks like the post card of a early 2000's stoner kid.

Dick Grayson 9/10

He's pretty. Most pretty people don't know how to roll, because there's always someone else to do it for them so he learned literally years after the first time he smoked just to prove to himself he could do it.

Steph 9/10

Knows how to do it. Doesn't smoke much or regularly. It's a thing in a life time. Used to smoke with Tim, now smokes with Cass, mostly rolls for Cass.

Kate Kane 8.

Solid 8. No I will not elaborate on that fuck you.

Jason Todd 7/10

Knows how to do it (10/10). Hate to do it. Will do it for a friend though, will also complain the whole time (will also do it wrongly on purpose to the same person stop asking him). Does not smoke. The only person who ever saw him smoke is Arsenal (when they were teenagers) and Harley (don't ask) and he like to keep it that way.

HOWEVER if the person rolling is Tim Drake, and exclusively Tim Drake he will take it from Tim's hands and roll it correctly just to be an asshole about it.

Barbara Gordon 5/10

Her father is a cop, it's not worth it the migraine. Generally smokes if there's someone else who bought and someone else to roll, she also doesn't see much the appeal and hates not be able to be able to control of her own body. Will make exceptions for the birds of pray.

Bruce Wayne 6/10

He can if he sets his mind about it but he only had smoked half of the times as Bruce Wayne™ playboy millionaire so there's always someone a simp to roll for him and the other half with Selina, Harley, Khoa and Harvey. And. every. single. one. of them rolled for him (each one for a different reason).

Cass 4/10

Would learn if she sets her mind to do it, but Steph rolls for her and she doesn't wanna lose this. So she pretends she's clueless about it.

Duke Thomas 2/10

Doesn't smoke. He's a fast learner so if he wanted to do it,he would probably would catch up quickly.

Damian Wayne 0/10

He's ten.

Probably he will eventually learn when he gets older, but not because he wants to smoke. He'll learn by himself because he's Bruce's son and Nightwing's younger brother, he wants to be prepared. Probably would roll for his friends like Jason does.

yeah I know he's not actually ten but in my mind he is fuck you

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yukiwhitetm · 5 days

Text

DR Characters Assigned DC Roles

The main premise of this is that Shuichi Saihara as Robin 3 is both dating civilian Kokichi Oma as Bernard Dowd and flirting/being flirted with by his alter ego Stray. Shuichi has no idea Kokichi is Stray but Kokichi definitely knows Shuichi is Robin 3. What order do these events happen in? Who knows!

The Bats and Birds

Batman (The Bat): Kyoko Kirigiri

Agent A: Makoto Naegi

Robin 1, Nightwing: Kaede Akamatsu

Robin 2, Red Hood: Hajime Hinata

Robin 3, Red Robin: Shuichi Saihara

Spoiler, Robin 4, Batgirl (Batboy): Kaito Momota

Robin 5: Fuyuhiko Kuzuryu

Batgirl, Oracle: Chiaki Nanami

Black Bat, Batgirl, Orphan: Maki Harukawa

Batwoman: Aoi Asahina

Signal: Yasuhiro Hagakure

The Cats

Catwoman: Celestia Ludenberg

Stray & Bernard Dowd: Kokichi Oma

The Rogues

Joker: Junko Enoshima

Punchline: Mukuro Ikusaba

Harley Quinn: Toko Fukawa

Poison Ivy: Komaru Naegi

Blackmask: Mondo Owada

Penguin: Kiyotaka Ishimaru

Scarecrow: Miu Iruma

Bane: Nekomaru Nidai

Mr. Freeze: Teruteru Hanamura

Riddler: Hifumi Yamada

Mad Hatter: Angie Yonaga

Deathstroke: Tsumugi Shirogane

The League of Assassins

Ra's al Ghul: Haiji Towa

Talia al Ghul: Korekiyo Shinguji

Prudence Wood: Peko Pekoyama

The Outlaws

Starfire: Sonia Nevermind

Arsenal: Nagito Komaeda

Bizarro: Ibuki Mioda

Teen Titans

Beast boy: Gundham Tanaka

Raven: Himiko Yumeno

Wonder girl: Tenko Chabashira

Superboy 1 a.k.a Conner Kent (Supergirl): Akane Owari

Kidflash: Mahiru Koizumi

Cyborg: K1b0

Aquaboy (Aquagirl): Hiyoko Saionji

Superboy 2 a.k.a. Jonathan Kent: Masaru Daimon

The Justice League

Superman (Superwoman): Sakura Ogami

Wonder Woman: Kirumi Tojo

Green Arrow: Byakuya Togami

Aquaman: Leon Kuwata

Martian Manhunter: Ultimate Imposter

Green Lantern: Kazuichi Soda

Captain Marvel: Nagisa Shingetsu

Flash: Chihiru Fujisaki

Zatanna: Sayaka Maizono

Black Canary: Mikan Tsumiki

Most of these characters have been assigned DC roles based on their personalities, regardless of gender (except for Superboy and Bizarro since they're clones of Superman so have to be the same gender as him)! I included some Rogues, League of Assassins, Outlaws, Teen Titans and Justice Leaguers because the Batfam interact with them a lot.

In my mind, Kyoko Kirigiri is together with Makoto Naegi and has been for the long term but her as the Bat and Celstia Ludenberg as Catwoman share some flirtatious banter.

Hajime Hinata as Robin 2 died and came back, and when he did he came back different. How much you want to lean into Jason Todd's backstory or Hajime Hinata's and whether you want to include Izuru Kamukuru is up to you.

Kaito Momota may or may not have had an unsuccessful romantic relationship with Shuichi when he was Spoiler and Shuichi was Robin 3. This can be prior to Shuichi meeting Kokichi or Robin 3 and Stray could have had some playful banter going on during this time (this works because Shuichi actually dates civilian Kokichi, which could be after he and Kaito break up). Kaito could be with Maki now!

Yes, this character assignment does mean that Masaru Daimon is Fuyuhiko Kuzuryu's best friend. Yes, that is hilarious.

I was running out of DR characters near the end so I started swapping some around to find suitable Justice Leaguers. Masaru was originally Captain Marvel but then that only left Kotoko Utsugi as an option for Superboy 2 and I thought Fuyuhiko would hate her. So, Masaru became Superboy 2 and Nagisa Shingetsu Captain Marvel. Byakuya Togami was originally assigned as Lucius Fox, the manager of WE, but I had to swap him to Green Arrow because he was just too perfect for that!

I hope you enjoyed! Please like, comment and reblog. Your support is much appreciated.

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radioactive-earthshine · 4 months

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If I was a writer for DC with zero pushback, I would do everything I could possibly think of to move the generational legacies along. Bruce Wayne retires as Batman, first off. Maybe someone replaces him in that role, maybe not (my outside shot is that Jason takes up the mantle after a big long emotional arc between the two of them) but he has to step down. He’s done way too many things that haunt his character for him to continue being Batman.

Following Nightwing’s lead in stepping up as leader of world’s biggest super-team, the other kids also advance in their legacy progression. Damian takes up a non-Robin role that lets him stand on his own, and finds a cause that he personally cares about.

Tim moves to an Oracle-type position so as to put Bernard in less danger Young Justice reforms as a Birds Of Prey style team that he directs with a focus on helping the young and neglected members of the hero/meta community, filling the role that the Teen Titans were meant to fill before they became the new JL. The YJ members all get new hero names as part of this process, obviously.

If I haven’t been killed in the street by an angry mob of fans at this point, I move on to another hero family that’s stagnating and repeat the process. Possibly the Superfam, although Clark is a lot harder to retire…

What would everyone's new names be? Bart should keep him name though.

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zorilleerrant · 9 months

Text

“Which is the dude from the thing?” Bernard asks, and Tim has to stare at him so hard it feels like his eyes are going to melt out of his head, but Bernard doesn’t even clarify until he clears his throat so blatantly it hurts. “You know, that one pop star that everyone wants to make fight Batman. I think he’s from – okay, now I can’t remember where he’s from, either.”

“Maybe you should go to sleep,” Tim says, rubbing his shoulders and kissing the top of his ear. “You’ve been up all night writing fanfic.” And it’s maybe selfish, but Tim kind of wishes he’d been up all night making chili or something, if he’s going to stay up all night, because the shitty fast food places aren’t open yet, and he needs something dense to eat. Whatever there is to microwave isn’t going to cut it.

“You’ve been up all night fighting clowns or whatever, so I think of the two of us, I make healthier life choices,” Bernard says, snappishly, but also without looking up from his screen. Tim knows it’s his fault that Bern keeps staying up, that it’s just a reaction to his anxiety, that it’s going to have to be Tim doing something, or else they’re just going to have to wait it out. But he still doesn’t expect Bernard, half asleep and writing what appears to be barely coherent language (and not entirely English), to say, “there’s a guy, he’s named after a bird? Shit, maybe he’s a superhero, actually. You guys all have bird names, and you’re superheroes, right?”

“Bern,” Tim says, gently, turning the chair so Bernard has to look away from his computer, which he clings very hard to, making agitated noises. “Bernard. Bernard, look at me. What the hell kind of bird do you think a Nightwing is? Do Oracle, Red Hood, Spoiler, Signal, or Huntress sound like any kind of bird to you? Are you tired enough to think a bat is a bird?”

“Red Hood sounds like it probably could be a bird,” Bernard mutters, scratching a little too intensely at his eyebrow, “some kind of like. A falcon or something. A hawk. What’s the dude who dresses in like super fashionable clothing and then he’s got like a motorcycle and stuff and I think he’s an assassin.”

“Bear, babe, you just described like half my family,” Tim says, tilting their foreheads together so he can attempt to look his boyfriend in the eye, except said boyfriend keeps darting his gaze back and forth, not like he’s looking for hidden dangers or weapons to fight them off with, but like he forgot something crucial. Turning off the stove level stuff. (Tim darts out to check the stove, just quickly, but it’s off.)

“He’s pink,” says Bernard, with a level of certainty Tim definitely can’t pull off on that little sleep, much as he tries. But he has no idea what kind of pink pop star motorcycle riding assassin fighting Batman Bernard thinks he – fuck.

“Flamingo?” Tim practically yells, wondering how to best pack incredulity into the rest of his sentence, “are you talking about Eddie fucking Flamingo, Bernard? That’s not a pop star and he’s not from a TV show, he’s real, and he has a rap sheet a mile long, because, as you said, he’s an assassin.”

“Right, yeah. Him. He’s cool,” Bernard says, with the tone of voice that definitely means that wasn’t the first adjective he thought of but he’s still worried Tim’s going to be jealous about it. Which isn’t totally unfair, because Tim still does get a little jealous when Bernard looks at other guys, but he’s trying to cut down on that because it’s not exactly helping anyone with anything. And Tim would like to be able to look at other guys without feeling guilty. (Just look.)

“He is not cool, Bernard, he eats fucking faces, Bernard, you need to go to sleep,” Tim says, and then pulls Bern’s face into his hands, and looks at him very long-sufferingly, but lovingly, and places a kiss on the tip of his nose. And then, just to drive his point home, repeats, “Go the fuck to sleep.”

“No, I have to get this scene,” Bernard says, typing the word Flamingo way too many times for Tim’s comfort, scrolling up and down through the document he has open, and several other files that don’t actually seem to have writing in them. “Hey, how strong is your dad, anyway? Could he like. Lift a motorcycle?”

“Could he lift a motorcycle?” Tim asks, giving up on spinning Bernard’s chair around again in favor of rubbing at his face and regretting asking any of these questions at any point, but unable to (after hearing that) let this lie. “How strong do you think Batman is? You know he’s human, right? Like a regular human? I did explain this, didn’t I?”

“He could have robots in his suit or something, I don’t know,” Bernard says, while Tim tries not to cry, because, admittedly, Luke can lift a motorcycle in most of his less compact suits. But the recharge time on those is astronomical, so it’s not like that’s a helpful comparison. There’s a reason Bruce uses them so sparingly, but there are a couple he obviously could lift a motorcycle in, if he saw a reason to use them. So Tim doesn’t even know what to say.

So he just reads over Bernard’s shoulder, while his boyfriend smirks and points out a couple of choice sentences, one of which he’ll have to come back to because that is definitely not a language he knows. It might be Mando’a. It’s written in roman characters, at least, which rules out a lot of things. “What do you need him to lift a motorcycle for, anyway?” Tim asks, because so far the motorcycle doesn’t seem to have appeared, although it might be in an earlier chapter. He’s really going to have to ask Bernard how many chapters this thing is.

“Oh, I want him to pick it up and use it to smack Flamingo in the face,” Bernard says, matter of factly, and then mimes what Tim figures must be what he thinks it would be like to pick up a motorcycle one-handed and then bitchslap someone with it. It’s a little bit too casual of a gesture to be convincing about it, though.

“Bernard, my love, my life, my reason for getting up in the morning,” Tim says, pinning his wrists so he can't open his browser back up again, “I have never been more serious about anything. You need to rethink this once you’ve slept.” The words grate, coming out of his mouth, and he’s not enjoying feeling sympathy for all the people who’ve said this to him, and probably he was still right and they were still wrong, but, like, he gets why they said it, now.

“No, no, it’s fine,” Bernard says, condescendingly patting Tim’s arm and giving him a rough kiss before turning back to the computer and typing rapidfire, in a way Tim’s pretty sure he’s never seen Bern do while completely awake. Some of those words are Portuguese, though. At least one sentence is in German. (It’s the one where the motorcycle finally appears.) “I think Batman can probably lift a motorcycle, if he gets a running start.”

Tim picks him up and carries him.

#look i said something #my writing #fanfic #batman #timber week 2023

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fishfrommars · 2 years

Text

MY IDEA OF HOW THE BATFAM TIMELINE GOES DOWN

(Based on what I have read. SPOILERS AHEAD FOR: REBIRTH, New 52, pride issue 2022, Robin 2021)

So does it go:

Batman becomes batman around age 25(?)

Flying Graysons die

Dick becomes Robin

Barbara becomes Batgirl

Dick stops being Robin

Dick becomes NightWing - has his Titans run, Chicago run, Blüdhaven run, etc. Boy is everywhere tbh.

Batgirl gets shot in the spine - becomes Oracle sometime

Jason becomes Robin

Jason dies

Batwoman in here somewhere(?) sorry Kate I have no idea when you start but it is in the beginning I know for sure :(

Dick and Bruce have a big fat fight *insert Batman slaps Robin meme* (i always thought it was about Jason when Bman slaps the bird but I think it's actually about Superman)

Tim and Bernard meet, their families are rich, etc they always end up at galas together, possibly the Waynes are there too...

Tim confronts Bruce and Dick about Batman and Robin

Tim becomes Robin

Tim's dad dies

Jason comes back, tho no one knows yet I think(?)

Timmy and Batman split up - cuz Bruce is a dick holy shit

Timmy is working with the Teen Titans

Jason tries to kill Timmy

Jason becomes mean Red Hood

Damian comes into town - which everyone (the three previous Robins) is mad about.

IDK when Stephanie becomes Robin but she is supposedly the fourth Robin - but becomes Batgirl and then Spoiler

There are two working Robins - Tim and Damian

Bruce goes missing - something about a time stream(???)

Dick chooses Damian to be his Robin - Timmy and Dick have a bigass fight

Everyone thinks Bruce is dead except Timmy

Connor dies

Steph dies(?)

Wally dies

(Holy shit Timmy's edgy time begins as he searches for Bruce) as Red Robin YUMMMM

Batman (Dick) catches Red Robin YUMMM (Tim) as Ra's al Ghul kicks him out a skyscraper window (holy fuck i loved that issue)

Bruce comes back - holy shit why does no one listen to Timmy

Jason forms the Outlaws(????)

Jason and Bruce reconcile (somewhere in here I am not sure where tho, suddenly Red Hood has a red bat on his chest and is occasionally out with the Robins and either only used rubber bullets or shoots people in the legs)

A little very short time passes where the batfam gets to hang out and do missions, which leads to the next event.

Damian dies

Wayne family fortune goes away(????) idk when it happens but here somewhere

Dick "dies" but the batfam doesn't know that he is an agent of Spiral

Batgirl comes back, Babs has her spine fixed with technology, so it works kinda like a conputer(????)

Damian comes back(?????)

Bruce loses his memory???

Dick comes back for a second - gets his stupid face punched by Jason, (timber and jaybird have been through a lot losing Damian, Bruce, and Dick in such a short time span holy shit) and he deserves it

Robin school(?????) (i did not finish the "Grayson" series so IDK what the frick that is about)

The world somehow forgets who Dick Grayson is through comic book magic????

Tim is back to being regular Robin(????) so there are two Robins?(???)

Alfred loses his hand (idk when this happens I just know it is in here somewhere)

Bruce's memory comes back

Dick gets shot in the head - honestly just... there are so many questions I had about this, the main one is why the fuck the Joker(s) are not dead yet, after everything they have done to the bats and the birds

Dick becomes Ric after losing his memory - we don't talk about it because - well - DC fucked up :/ (i have a lot of rants planned out for this tbh. Starting with how the bat fam treated Ric, and how after Nightwing went missing none of the bats decided Blüdhaven was worth defending, and how they did Bea dirty even tho she was an ideal partner to someone like Ric / Dick....)

Alfred dies

Robin - Timmy and Damian both in Gotham as Robins - i think Timmy is pretty independent at this point, also he is legally emancipated at this point so he doesn't answer to Bruce anymore...

Dick's memory comes back

Damian and Batman have a falling out(????) and Robin goes off on his own - the newest Robin (2021) series (which I totes recommend if you need to understand Damian a little more - also bonus all five Robins have a scene in it (issue 5 i think) and it is fantastic)

Fun fact all of the Robins have died by this point (though idk if Dick's counts cuz his heart did technically stop but there was no lazarus pit to bring him back just pure adrenaline shot to the heart...)

Tim and Bruce get along again?

Tim and Bernard go out after reconnecting (?????) new thing, waiting for the issue in August 2022 I think?

Tim gets shot in the neck(?????) new issue july 2022

Duke and Cass come into the picture as (?) Outsiders(????) i forget their group name I am sorry) So Spoiler, Signal, orphan now a team since Bruce adopted them I guess. Also Batwing is there (is that his name?) - it's Luke Fox, the guys who had a rescue mission and stole some cool Bat tech to get Bruce back after Talia kidnapped him (also a cool guy to check out. He is a good one to keep up with too. Butts heads with Bruce a lot when it comes to raising the bat babies - which GOOD).

Idk about you, but there is defs over 80 years worth of history here that is supposed to happen over the span of like 20 years (holy cow) and Bruce is supposedly supposed to pick up the mantle of Batman at around 25 or so, and a year and a half in he adopts 9 year old Dick Grayson. Holy shit these kids....

@ me if you think I forgot something or if I need to fix it :)

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fantasticgothicpeachsludge · 2 years

Text

Tim: I am an expert at identifying birds.

Bernard: Okay, what about those ones flying over there? *points at Nightwing Robin Spoiler and Red hood grappling over head*

Tim: Yep, they're all Robins.

#Bernard: Wait what??#Tim drake #bernard dowd #timber #timbern #robin #Red Robin #dc #Batman #incorrect quotes

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alto-tenure · 9 months

Text

okay. let's re-establish our characters:

main bat-cast:

TIM DRAKE as BATMAN

STEPHANIE BROWN as ROBIN

BARBARA GORDON as ORACLE

CASSANDRA CAIN as HERSELF

DUKE THOMAS as THE SIGNAL

other people that are in Gotham:

JASON TODD as RED HOOD

ROSE WILSON as HERSELF? (possibly Ravager. uncertain)

KATE KANE as BATWOMAN

BERNARD DOWD as HIMSELF

DARCY THOMAS as SPARROW

characters who are Not In Gotham for at least part of the story but are still fairly important somewhere:

DAMIAN WAYNE as NIGHTWING

DICK GRAYSON as ???

HELENA BERTINELLI as HUNTRESS

BRUCE WAYNE as BATMAN

TEAM SECTION

NOT-SO-YOUNG JUSTICE (less a team and more a friend group):

CASSIE SANDSMARK as SANDSTORM

KON-EL as SUPERNOVA

BART ALLEN as IMPULSE

CISSIE KING-JONES as HERSELF

ANITA FITE as EMPRESS

GRETA and SLOBO may or may not be around too

THE BIRDS OF PREY:

as mentioned earlier, HELENA and BABS

DINAH LANCE as BLACK CANARY

um. I do not know the Birds of Prey well enough to say who might be on a team with these three approximately five years after the current state of canon. Steph and/or Cass would probably go here if not for Extenuating Circumstances. Would Rose be invited to the team, given that she’s on better terms with some of the other vigilantes? No clue.

OTHER CHARACTERS THAT SHOULD MAYBE, PROBABLY AT LEAST CAMEO:

Clark, Diana, other characters that are theoretically Bruce's friends and would be sad if he died

idk a few of the Gotham rogues. Scarecrow? Selina? Ivy? Harley? The Penguin? I'm not including the Joker I don't like him enough for that

OTHER CHARACTERS I CAN'T FIGURE OUT BUT WANT TO INCLUDE:

GHOSTMAKER

yeah that's it

some explanations under the cut

there are definitely more characters operating from Gotham. I brought up some in some of my earlier posts about this AU. I just don't think Batman matters enough to them to justify their inclusion (Xanthe) or I don't know enough about them to say accurately what they would be doing (Claire Clover).

I don't think Sandstorm is a terrible name for Cassie. Yes Bart plays Darude a lot. There are some regrets. It is still too cool to give up.

Supernova!Kon is just cool. There are already two Supermen. We can chill. Kon should get a new identity to himself.

Anita is back in the vigilante business because at this point the kids are...definitely old enough to be in school full-time. It is still pretty chaotic. Greta I know has made a recent ish appearance. Slobo is still stuck in comics limbo I think? But the whole squad is here. YJ is primarily there to be Tim’s friends, so their hero selves don't matter as much, but they (esp the other core 4 members) are who Tim calls for backup first outside the Bats because it simply would not occur to him to call Bruce's friends when he needs help. He has his own friends.

I really want Khoa to be in this because the personality clashes between him and Tim would be insane. Alas I can't find a way to fit him in. I don't think Batman Inc is sustainable especially with Khoa as the leader...Khoa is not a teamup guy. This is like. The basis of his personality clashes with Tim. But I think the future of Batman Inc should be that Khoa pisses off everyone on his team to the point where he's left alone.

#dc #au: gotham needs a batman #<- please. if you're confused as to what's going on. check out the rest of this tag

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