#Bruce at a justice league meeting is completely stone cold and terrifying

[incorrect-quotes-batfam-edition]

My favorite thing about Batman is that he’s the best fighter and smartest person in the room…until a single one of his kids shows up.

Batman, normally:

*rattles off extremely smart plan with multiple contingencies*

*can beat Superman if given five minutes of prep time*

*is scary*

*can and will fuck you up*

Batman when one of his kids is within a half mile radius:

“Fuck if I know, ask Stephanie.”

*squints really hard* I don’t know that language. Talk to Nightwing.

“Red Robin is much better at these kinds of things.”

“Look, if you want an actually decent sparring partner, Cassandra and Damian are in the kitchen.”

*gestures vaguely* “Someone go find Duke, I need someone competent.”

“Jason, help me.”

*speaking directly into the bottom of his phone way too loudly* Oracle, comms are down. What do you want me to do?

#Bruce at a justice league meeting is completely stone cold and terrifying #but then he’s at home and just gets completely totaled by his army of traumatized children #bruce wayne #dick grayson #cassandra cain #cassandra wayne #jason todd #barbara gordon #tim drake #stephanie brown #duke thomas #damian wayne #batfamily #headcannons #batfam #batfamily headcanons #also I have my last final tomorrow and then I’m free till January #so I will possibly get back on a regular posting schedule