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#But I cannot work! there's no way I can work like this I can't even play video games all I can do is like
chatsukimi · 2 days
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POV. STREATRACER!TOJI asks to borrow your last name.
.・*:。.・*:。.・*:。.・*:。.・*:。.・*:。.・*:。.・*:。.・
“What do you mean you don’t want your last name printed on your uniform?”
Toji, your trust fund racer and favourite bet, shrugs. “Already said, I won’t race with the name Zen’in.”
You sit down at your desk. It’s after school, and you and the spoiled soon-to-be college reject are sitting in the classroom.
You throw your hands up. “But why? What’s bad about Zen’in?”
“Everything,” he deadpans.
Staring at the guy for a flat five seconds, you realise he won’t change his mind, or explain himself, which you should have expected from a guy going broke despite his millionaire family.
Toji props himself up on the desk beside yours, leaning on his knees as though thinking. A few seconds pass.
He offers, “why don’t I use yours?”
“My what?”
“Your last name,” he suggests, breezing through the prospect at horrifying speed. “It works. You’re sponsoring me anyways.”
You blink twice. Delayed reaction.
“What?!” you squeak out.
Toji smirks, leaning on his palm watching you. “What?” he repeats, playing innocent. He sports a smug look in his green eyes and even bothers to scan your notebook splayed out on your desk, reading your last name out loud to himself. “Nice.”
No. Not nice. They’ll assume you're- you're- your cheeks heat up.
He looks at you, bearing a smile that's all teeth. 'We could be cousins.'
The guy even dares to pat you on the shoulder at that. You shake him off. No one at the race would believe you two are related.
"No."
'No?' he echoes, cocking his head, tempting you to speak. 'What could we be then?'
"We can be... can be..." you think to yourself, before noticing his hands landing on your shoulder, massaging them like a habit. He's sauntered over from his chair.
Comforting, but still...
Bad habit.
Your heart stutters.
Baaad habit.
"Hm?" He chuckles when he sees you realise. "What would we be?"
You swallow, the small proximity between the two of you taking your mind on a field trip; him standing behind your seat and you, fidgeting your hands under the desk like crazy.
"Nothing."
He raises an eyebrow.
"I don't think taking your last name means nothing," he presses, serious.
How is he saying this with such a straight face? You're looking anywhere in the classroom but Toji, hoping he might just drop the subject. What's wrong with his last name anyways? What is he even insinuating? Does he really-
"I don't think I'll get tired of that face in ten years' time," he states.
Toji Zen'in is a blunt guy. When he said he hates his last name, he meant it. When he says he wants yours, well, no one's calling this guy a liar, are they?
It's been a while since you started sponsoring his races, and he's grown accustomed to your face in the stands. Always too far away, though. You always have on that dispassionate expression as a gambler, as though he's one of the rest.
For once, he cannot be just one of the rest.
“I'm... not sure what you mean." Your eyes move to the sunset outside, ignoring the way you bite your lip.
He studies your face for a minute before smirking again. "You're dabbling in illegal motorsports and can't look me in the eye."
You wince.
You murmur, "well then maybe you should say directly what you mean then."
You're so cute like this, pretending you don't like him too.
He walks around the table to face you properly. All of a sudden you can imagine your name on his back as he gets into the vehicle to race, as the stands to hear the cheers of the crowd. He'd wear it well. He coughs to get your attention.
“I’m saying.” He places his hands on his hips, shrugging as he goes. “Maybe let's be married. Just one day.”
Only, he doesn't intend for it to be one day. He wants you to remember your last name on him, keep the moment in your head; he'll wear it better than anyone else.
It is at that moment when the times come out and the trophies are awarded that he drapes his arm around your waist. The wink he throws your way, accomplice. Spectators ask what's his name.
And this is the moment you become more than his financier or the bets you place on him to win.
He speaks it into the microphone, proud for the stadium, the world. to hear.
And this is the moment you glance up at him with more than just a shallow smile, saying 'congrats'.
The word reverberates over the race track in a powerful wave.
He spoke into the microphone and the name is yours.
pt. 1
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why logan isn't getting replaced at imola, a breakdown
(aka a breakdown so my fellow logan girlies (gn) don't break down)
I've seen this getting around, with a little traction and some people panicking a bit so let's discuss.
Joe Saward has not been a reliable source of transfer news for some time. Let's be real. A lot of this is gaining traction because Saward is "a 35 year accredited F1 journalist". And this is true, he has long experience in F1 and is accredited in the paddock. But it has been many, many years since he was accurate about driver market predictions.
You have to be eighteen to get a superlicence (thanks, Max!). Antonelli does not turn 18 until August. For him to be granted a superlicence in time for Imola, the FIA would have to issue an exemption. If Antonelli was carving up F2 it'd be one thing. But he's been far from convincing so far, and it hasn't just all been Prema. He is an F2 rookie - and he looks like it.
James Vowles has already said that Antonelli to Williams next year is not a given, because Williams has its own juniors - of which Logan is one. Now I know James has been in the bad books with plenty of us since the whole chassis debacle in Melbourne but I do believe him on this. He is quite keen to establish that Williams is not a feeder team for Mercedes and that has been the board's position for some time too (remember their angry denunciation when the rumour was that Oscar was going to replace Latifi at Silverstone?).
James Vowles still believes in Logan. Now I know some of you will be claiming this is doubtful, but I do believe it to be true. In the Japan Vowles Verdict he was warm in his praise for Logan's race pace and early stint - to the point his voice literally changed tone while answering the question. He was absolutely effusive in his praise for Logan after the Melbourne debacle. I do genuinely think that James wants to keep him.
Bringing in a driver change mid-season is incredibly disruptive - you don't do it unless you are certain you're getting a better deal out of it. Last year Alpha Tauri brought in Daniel halfway through the year. The main reason for this was because he was a fairly immediate upgrade to de Vries. But even if you're scornful of Daniel's pace, the other reason they wanted him was for his feedback and car development ability, which AT were pretty vocal that they found invaluable. Bringing in an extremely green, unprepared rookie who has barely worked with the team would be a recipe for instability, morale issues, and more broken bits, which is the absolute last thing Williams needs.
Toto Wolff can't offer James Vowles a big enough incentive to take his junior. Let's cut to the chase on this: to insinuate that James would take Antonelli just because Wolff asked is a pretty big insult to James. He's not Wolff's lapdog. They clearly respect one another and have a personal relationship outside of the sport, but that doesn't mean he'll just do whatever Toto wants - he didn't get to be team principal that way. So Toto would need to offer James an incentive. But what can he offer that James actually needs? Williams aren't broke any more, so money isn't going to cut it. And Williams already run the Mercedes engine, so Toto can't convince him with that. What Williams actually needs - the cultural and procedural overhaul that James has begun - Toto cannot help with.
tl;dr keep cool and keep the faith, logan fans. there's still plenty of time left in our ride.
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buck-up-buck · 1 day
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7x09 is titled "Unfinished Business" ....
Tell me that is not a revenge plot against Bobby. TELL ME. You can't. If I was not convinced before, I AM NOW.
hErE mE oUt.
I'm not saying they are going to burn down Buck's loft, I AM NOT... BUT, imagine Bobby is dropping a patient off at the hospital with Hen and Chim (I know this hardly ever happens but roll with me guys), and our friend, the Burn Unit Nurse, sees him, and is like...
"Bobby?" BECAUSE, he recognises him, from all those years ago in Minnesota. He lived in Bobby's apartment complex, they were somewhat neighbours, and he saw Bobby go into that vacant apartment that night (the night we do not DARE talk about), on his way to work, and was working a night shift at the hospital when suddenly, they get an influx of patients with burns and smoke inhalation from an apartment fire downtown, and he hears in passing from a nurse the address, and his heart sinks because no his fiance was at home asleep at that address and he hears from someone a few weeks later that the fire started in a vacant room due to an electrical issue with a space heater and HE JUST KNOWS.
And Bobby turns around to face him and is like "Sorry, do I know you?" Because Bobby was going through it back then, he doesn't remember this guy, and the guy is like, "Sorry, no, I was mistaken." And he walks away leaving Bobby all like huh.
Then the episode ends with the truck pulling into the firehouse and the camera pans out and we see BURN UNIT NURSE GUY STOOD ACROSS THE ROAD STARING UP AT THE FIREHOUSE BECAUSE DUN DUN DUN- He has some Unfinished Business to attend to.
If this so happens to lead to the burning down of Buck's loft because this guy does his research and he does some stalking and he sees a connection that Bobby has with Buck that he doesn't seem to share with the other members of the team, then well, ya'll didn't see it here first but I fucking called it if so, because you're telling me that is not a CRAZY storyline right there.
BUT, even if not, even if we do not get our beloved loft burning down scene that we have been writing and praying for on Fanfiction for years, you cannot tell me that there is not going to be some kind of dark revenge plot going on in the last four episodes. This nurse is about to cause some HAVOC I CAN SENSE IT. MY SPIDEY SENSES ARE TINGLING GUYS.
Anyway, @whollyjoly and @thetangycheesemanwithaplan had the absolute joy of hearing this from a very sleep-deprived me last week and now that the episode titles have been released, Buck's loft burning down and Burn Unit Nurses revenge plot is going to be my new personality trait. Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU.
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That makes sense with Blanche! Tbh I’m the same ^^;; What if his love asked him about going on a date as a way to confess (she is attempting to indirectly confess by asking if they are going to go on a date together). Alternatively, if she was feeling bold and asked if he would kiss her?
Anon also asked: I forgot to ask in the last one I sent, if Blanche’s love asked him “do you have romantic feelings for me?” Would he answer honestly?
The previous ask connected to this
tw: sexually suggestive
Blanche would be as dense as a rock. He thinks you asking him out on a date is the same as wanting to hang out with him platonically. The same goes for the request for a kiss, Blanche thinks that you just wanted affection from him then. It's not like he had never put his lips on you, he does that all the time!
It's only when you ask if he could kiss you on the lips, will he starts to stutter and blush a bit as it's slightly suggestive. However, he chooses to think you have the purest intentions, he would give you a tender peck on your lips regardless of flustering.
Any and every indirect confession will not work on him, he will remain as affectionate as ever. It is only when you explicitly tell him that you want to fuck him or suck him off, he will understand that you want to steer this relationship in another direction, to uncharted waters. In usual Blanche-y fashion, he will stutter, become all bashful, and turn into a tomato. He will tend to hide behind his hands, too embarrassed to face you.
His belief is that once the relationship has a sexual aspect to it, it's automatically romantic. There are no such things as friends with benefits to him, that's silly! You cannot remain friends with someone who has been inside you or you inside them. That is another level of vulnerability that can only be shared between the sweetest of lovers.
Blanche's behavior will change around you, perhaps for the better. He would be a bit awkward and under extreme stress for the first few weeks, but everything will eventually get back to normal. Except with the occasional lewd touches and dirty flirting (usually from your end, he would still be too shy and too much of a gentleman to initiate such things so boldly).
However, once you change the relationship into this state, there is no going back. You can't tell him that you just see him as a mere friend, you wouldn't want to make him think you led him on, would you? And you knew what he thought of those who made a fool out of him, you definitely wouldn't want him to see you as his enemy.
The only way to break up with him is through death. Even then, it may not be guaranteed.
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pyreo · 3 days
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kinda fascinated by falin's characterisation bc I feel like you can see the thought process with it
the driving force of the whole adventure is Save Falin and, although we understand that sympathetically as it's clear Laios and Marcille love her dearly, and it's natural to feel invested in a guilt-ridden brother wanting his little sister to be alive again. It runs into a writing problem
'How do you make the audience care about Falin when they don't know her'. We have all the time in the world to get to know the main cast and love them, but it's tricky to engage people's emotions when they cannot see a character's personality, and Falin dies on page 1
So I think the decision was. To make her as unobtrusive as possible. Without her presence we can conceptualise one trait for her, and it's sheer innocence. There's nothing bad about Falin. She's the sweetest woman ever. She was a healer. She was kind and lovely to everyone. She was great at magic and cast spells with hugs. She's never depicted with her eyes open, making her always look serene and childlike. (And, I think, forcing some distance, reminding you we don't know her, and can't, because she's dead)
Falin is simply just a giving, caring person, loves everyone around her... and that wouldn't work as a character usually, it's too sanded, too smooth, there's no hook. But the hook is she's dead. Felt through her absence. So she gets away with it fine.
I like to think the conscious decision to pitch Falin to the reader was 'she's great and everyone loved her' and you can't disagree because what are you gonna do, speak ill of the dead? The only action we directly see her take is pushing Laios out of the way and getting eaten instead of him. The only thing we know is that she's never done a thing wrong in her life and she was killed, bam. There's no nuance even. She was too pure to die like that, so we have to save her, clearly. And it works.
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hazbinsimp777 · 2 hours
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Hello! I'd love to request some cuddly fluff with Lucifer, Vox, and Alastor. It's my favorite trio pairing!
CUDDLING HEADCANNONS
Featuring Alastor, Lucifer and Vox
Reader read as female
A/N: I love these three sm! Thank you for the request ember! <3
✅️Fluff
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~ALASTOR~
~ If you are dating Alastor in the first place, you are going to get a lot of privileges that others will not have (obviously) But of course, he still has his boundaries.
~ When you two are cuddling, it will have to be somewhere private. For example, his room, your room, or the room you two share (only when married) at times, when he is in a generous mood, in the hotel's library or lobby couch.
~ Where does he like cuddling? His favorite place he loves cuddling is on his armchair in his room. In an innocent way of course, he loved having you in his lap with your arms around him. This means easy access to your neck when it wants to bite it :3
~ No like sometimes he will just take a bite out of your neck, its not even sexual most of the time, only to the point when there is a light hint of pain, to leave a bite mark, he's just a bastard like that-
Alastor: *bites neck*
Y/n: Alastor! Agh- not again-
*The next day*
Angel: The fuck attacked you?
Y/n, tired: A deer
~ While cuddling, on the bed, he will lay his head on your head, Which you resting in his chest. So you are in comforable pajamas, his is still in his suit, fully dressed.
~ Even from cuddling he doesn't even fall asleep! At night, when you fall asleep from cuddling, he just, stares at you. Sometimes in a creepy way but he just wants to admire everything about you! Admiring your hair, face, closed eyes, your loud/quiet snores. Even when you drool in your sleep (if you do)
~ He will still hold you when you sleep, when he isn't watching you, he is simply reading or listening to jazz on the radio.
~ Alastor MUST ALWAYS be the big spoon, he will not tolerate being the little spoon on ANY circumstances. Okay maybe that was a lie... He will like being small spoon when he had a horrible day and cannot keep his smile up. On days like that, he just wants to be babied and held on those days. But that has only happened twice.
~ Baby this man he still misses his mother :(
~ He might not always ask for cuddles, but he is just too prideful to ask for them, so PLEASE ask him, he is always up for cuddles, he just doesn't want to admit it
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~VOX~
~ This man is so confusing when it comes to cuddling, sense he was hesitant about them at first. In his past no one had asked to cuddle innocently with him, only being sex they desired from him.
~ The first time cuddling, was, delightful, he never thought it would feel this...secured. He had never felt this...loved before. Whenever with you, he feels safe and unjudged, which is new for him, but never unwelcomed.
~ From that point on, he just wants you in his arms 24/7, even during work if you are his assistant. Vox loves the feeling of his arms around you anywhere, especially in public, as if telling everyone, "Yeah! This hot and pretty specimen is mine!"
~ Something he hold dear to that metal heart, is the times when you are sitting down on his lap while he works on things for his business. Vox will usually have his hand on your thigh, gently squeezing anything really. Vox is a multi-tasker.
~ When cuddling in private, he loves telling you how perfect you are, kissing everything he loves about you. Which is everywhere. Not in an sexual way most times, more in like a, "let me show you how much I love you" sort of way.
~ One thing he will NEVER admit to anyone, besides to Velvette and Valentino is that he is a little spoon most of the times you have cuddled. Because they have walked in on that ten times He can't help it! He likes when you wrap you arms around him, he goes FERAL!
~ Night cuddles happen very rarely because he is always working on the latest new tech. But, when they do happen, he makes sure they are memorable and last a very long time.
~ It can be hard at times to cuddle especially with his, interesting shaped head...
Y/n: V-vox?
Vox: Yeah babe?
Y/n: Can you move your head please?
Vox: But I'm corfortable here :( so no >:)
Y/n: Voxy....MOVE YOUR FUCKING HEAD BEFORE I PUNCH THAT SCREEN!
~ This overworked man loves having physical touch with you, don't ever take that away from him. Seriously he will short-circuit.
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~LUCIFER~
~ It is no secret this man LOVES physical touch from his partner. No, I mean it, he can't physically live without touching his partner in some way. He will be more than happy with holding hands or hand around your waist.
~ So I can imagine how much he lives for cuddles, living for your touch.
~ He is actually the one who asked for the cuddles, sure, he was a little shy. Because he hasn't had any for a long time. Ever since Lilith left him of course. Seriously how could she leave this man?
~ Lucifer loves being little spoon, shorter or taller than him, he really doesn't care. Of course, you will be little spoon at times, but I'd imagine those time would be extremely rare for him. But he will NEVER admit that, being the sin of pride.
~ This little short king just like when his domiant partner just cuddles him like a tiny puppy :3
~ When cuddling, he loves burying his face in your chest, giving it little kisses whenever and wherever he can. Long or short hair? One thing is for sure, he is going to play with it in whatever way he can.
~At times you wonder, is he addicted to your cuddles?
Lucifer: Baby! Why are you leaving me, as your husband I need attention. *pouts*
Y/n: Luci, I need to go help Charlie with the hotel *Attempting to get free from his grasp he is stronger than he looks*
Lucifer: *groans*
Y/n: *sigh* I'll give you twice as more when I come back.
Lucifer: YAY!
~ You have to remember this guy had a rough life, I mean, his wife just left him and hasn't had a good relationship with his only daughter for a while.
~ When cuddling, Lucifer loved holding hands with you, rubbing circles with it with his thumb. Placing gentle and soft kisses on your hand, especially on your ring finger. He would even just play with it sometimes, like a little kid.
~ He most ideally likes cuddling on your shared bed, but anywhere like the floor, couch ect. Basically anywhere were you two can lay down and enjoy each others touch.
~ One thing is for sure, he loves everything about you and your cuddling, so please don't ever take that privilege away from him.
A/N: I hope this delivered Ember! And I hope you have a good day.
Drink water and Stay Healthy Lovelies! <3
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sugar-omi · 2 days
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I feel like Cove is the type of boyfriend to go into nail salons with his partner to be close (he’s a fucking giant lost puppy) and also to pay for his partner’s nails. Imagine looking through the colors with him in the waiting area and leaning over to whisper in his ear “what color do you wanna see wrapped around your cock tonight baby?” Fucking frying his poor brain, now he can’t follow to the nail chair cause he’s hard.
yesss i've talked about that before, n i'm so glad someone else thinks he'd also pay for your nails/give his imput!!! he'd be so happy to pay for them for you n he'd be super happy if you asked what you should do for your nails
after you whisper that in his ear, he'd have to just go straight to the car, he cannot hide it n he won't be able to sit still anyway because now he's thinking abt it. and he's restless.
oh but he does pick out a color.. has a hard time keeping composure bc he's thinking about it, vividly imagining your nails wrapped around his dick only to paint your hand in his cum by the end..
i can't tell you what color he'd pick. he'd be thinking about his favorite colors, your favorite color/s, nail trends.. tries to think back to whatever nail inspo pics you've been looking at most, and picking one of those colors if that's the theme of your scrolling
tells you the color, and if you agree, he's out. he'll see you outside in an hour or so
and when you get home (or to the nearest secluded parking spot if you're real horndogs), he's like putty in your your hands.
only metaphorically, because he's ridiculously hard. to think such a little comment would stir him up that much is crazy but it did
even makes you undo his pants. he just wants to see you use those hands on him in every way. hates when you slowly tug down his zipper and tug his jeans halfway down his thighs, and your nails scrap his hips as you tug down his boxers to expose his heavy cock..
he's fucking hypnotized
his eyes are honed in on your hand, how you hold his dick tightly on your hand, jus the way he likes. and your manicured thumb is circling his leaky, flushed head.
his head is spinning like crazy. pretty sure you've changed his brain chemistry with that question earlier at the salon, he'll never be able to look at your nails (especially this set and that color) after today. probably won't be able to think about anything else the next time you ask him what you should do for your nails
ohh but he'd melt if you lowered yourself towards his lap, taking as much as you can down your throat, focusing on lavishing the tip with attention from your tongue
can't help but throw his head back, your spit drenching his length, and you're still working the rest of his length with your hand. the obscene wet sounds, plus your new nails, pre and drool running over your knuckles, it has him in pieces
and when he falls over the edge, his cum spilling past your lips and you pull off him, his dick is still lively at the sight of your swollen lips kissing his tip and licking at his leaky tip as you
can't help but be rearing to go again even after he finishes. the sight of your pretty, swollen lips and your hand, twisting to work him through his orgasm, milking him for those last few spurts of cum that run over your knuckles...
jfc he's so easy to ruin with a good handjob
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balkanradfem · 2 days
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I’m jealous of your lifestyle, how you talk about gardening and swimming in lakes and all that stuff. How are you able to do it? Do you own land? Are you rich? Do you have a job? I know that’s personal, but I ask because I want to make my life more like yours.
Gardening and swimming in lakes is not my life. It's only moments, and I choose to highlight those moments on this blog because I want to share my happy moments with someone, and hopefully inspire people to garden and to be less dependent on grocery stores for food.
It seems you only read few recent posts on my blog, but didn't find my posts where I write about health issues that are so bad that I cannot walk for more than 20 minutes, where I can't keep a full-time job because of my chronic illness, mostly can't afford to buy food and that is why I grow it in the community garden with no budget, posts where I'm heartbroken that the city where I live, with roommates, is taking down trees that are my only source of comfort.
I'm picking and choosing what to write about, and sometimes I only pick good moments because I don't want to spend my time here complaining and making people feel bad for me. And you now picked over those, to create this fictional lifestyle that nobody is having. I'm too sick to have a regular job, so I made peace with poverty and working less. So I have time for gardening, but I have to share a room, and eat just what I grow. And sometimes I can go and dunk myself into the river, which is something anyone can do who lives close to the river.
The thing is, this is what happens with anyone who showcases their light and happy moments online, it creates the illusion of a lifestyle that doesn't exist, you could pick and choose moments from anyone's life and make it seem like they're living a fictional life that feels too good to be true. People will even exaggerate to create that illusion on purpose, to create admiration or jealousy. But I purposely don't do that, I write about ruining my washing machine with moss, fixing my own toilet, despairing because my bike broke and I have no way to get to work because I can't walk, having a neck injury that doctors can't seem to help me with. It is heartbreaking to me that someone would say 'I want this lifestyle', nobody wants this.
If you have few hours of free time a week, and know of a place in a community garden, you can try to get a parcel and grow food there. If you have a body of water near you, you can try swimming in it, provided it's not polluted. If you live in an area where growing space is not accessible, and bodies of water are far away or polluted, then this is made difficult or impossible. My only luck is that the city I live in is not yet so badly polluted that air and water would be poisonous to me, so I can have my little moments enjoying the nature before the climate change gets to it.
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viviennelamb · 2 days
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If you're a real artist of any kind, never read opinions from non-artists or people who haven’t taken any risks in their lives. Remember, you're not a feedback reader, you're making people like you feel less alone and perfecting your craft and process. When it comes to your art, think of this and nothing else.
The ordinary person doesn't know what devotion is like because their brains aren't even 1% functional.
They're not full nor complex people either, they're an ego programmed to please others so they can fit in. Uncreative people target anybody different from them. This is why they’re into politics and activism and can’t stand that anybody thinks differently than them. This is the Ego's nature.
I was there at some point too and it was repressive, but now I'm free. Those who aren't free judge because they're prisoners of their own minds. always remain aware of envy and the crabs in a bucket mentality. Doesn’t matter if they’re race, gender or sexuality liberationists, they are against you if you’re a real person and will hate you for being free without needing their help.
I know a lot of the people reading this are looking to break through their mental barriers and I must tell you the obvious... life is a millisecond in cosmic time and you must act quickly on the opportunities presented to you.
Nobody is rewarded for being "the most liked by egos.” When you die, you need to leave something that somebody can unearth and feel like they hit the jackpot to read, listen and look at and cherish for the rest of their lives.
There's no time for preoccupation with what zombies think. If you have time to worry, you need to add more work into your schedule (all real work is Spiritual, everybody else is just a busy body).
Successful people are too busy winning, or at least learning how to win, to judge people who are focused on their own craft. If you see somebody doing them but you’re judging instead of being inspired, you’re average and always will be until you decide to go for what you’re most scared to do.
Play your role to the fullest and you'll stop being depressed regardless of what the world shows you. When you're doing all that you can, you'll be lifted out of your depression. Most people are long-term severe melancholics because they’re not creating, but believe they're well and project that depression unto those who are sane and healthy.
Since being a depressive is normal, those who have the drive to do what they love everyday, regardless of what anybody has to say about it, are deemed unwell because it's not socially acceptable to serve your soul. Everybody wants you to be their social slave instead.
Beauty isn't balanced or normal, it's extreme and rare.
You keep daydreaming and thinking "if only I could..." you can! The second you decide to go for what you want, everything becomes available to you. You don't have to plan, just make the vow and act immediately and once you iterate and record what works and what doesn't, you're making progress.
If you want a shortcut, find a mentor. The more you stay in the freeze state nothing happens. Your conscious mind cannot comprehend "how," so forget attempting to understand or map out the trajectory of your life and just act.
Even if you're an aspiring artist, stop reading stuff you can't relate to, or negative people who judge others for stepping out of the box because that affects your mental health and therefore your art, even when it's not directed at you.
That fear they meant to direct at others doesn’t actually affect the supposed recipient, but the individual saying it as well as their peers. Now their peers are secretly scared to be open with somebody they thought they trusted.
By the way, the highest art is the Art of Self-Mastery. Once you take back full control of your mind, senses and body, you're well on the path to achieving the purpose of life. Even better if you share the process of achieving your purpose. Don't wait until everything is perfect.
Sure, people will think they know you even though you only share 0.01% of your life, but at the end of the day, you're stopping yourself from doing what you're meant to do. Any obstacles you face is a test to show yourself how much you really want something. Think of these obstacles as checkpoints.
Once you get going, you will get real life checks to show you how strong you've gotten and how much you've improved in your role/craft. Stay locked in regardless.
The vast majority are extremely mentally unwell because they don't create or share anything that brings light into other people's lives. That stagnancy, as well as their hatred of the soul is the death of the mind.
Never listen to a dabbler who only creates once a month even worse, once a year, tell you anything about your creation. Just nod and smile because you're listening to an opinionated slave.
Remember, the only thing the ordinary person produces daily is an orgasm and poop. It would take the fragile and mindless a month to write a post like this, same with the art you're driven about, but they will judge and dissect what you do when they haven't done anything, ever. They don't have the discipline to write and release something in the same day because they're too busy arguing and gossiping about what a random thinks.
Only intake art and perspectives from people who are utterly and crazily obsessed and then you'll feel like your heart is finally waking up, which is what happened to me. Only then will you reach that point of being unable to feign lukewarmness and soullessness anymore.
Once you begin to exit mediocrity, you will see people's hatred toward you (which is really toward themselves) leaking out as false concern, fighting, and creating dossiers on strangers yet this person doesn't even keep a daily journal of their own thoughts. These individuals exist for you. They're waiting for you because their life consists of talking about others, so give them something to talk about.
When an individual can't be honest and haplessly spends their life energy, they become afflicted with loneliness, anxiety, and a chaotic mind regardless of how many bodies they pile around them and how much validation they get. Most people are unskilled, emotionally, and socially retarded for this reason.
When I read stuff from those individuals in particular I'm severely underwhelmed... it's all misinformation about other people's lives and it's not even at least entertaining. I’m looking for anything real from them and there’s nothing but there’s nothing but race policing and sexual harassment.
They don't know what it's like to strive for something bigger than personal comfort and social validation. When their useless life ends, all that will be left behind of their existence is documentation of their sex-addiction, their list of diagnosed mental illnesses, ideology fights, and gossip.
Also, the people who say they wish they could meet certain artists are all lying. They would've been part of the crowd who judged them if they lived during the same time, especially the ones who pride themselves on being conformists whose best accomplishment is getting a girlfriend.
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antiendovents · 9 hours
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abt discussion "is functional multiplicity a way of being non-disordered system?" if no one minds, am gonna add my opinion too.
functional multiplicity isn't non-disordered way of being system. it's like remission / recovery.
when you have some chronic condition, you can manage it and feel fine. you can show fewer symptoms or don't show them at all. but you still have this condition.
if you are on meds for arthritis and don't have active inflammation now, you still have arthritis. you may still have some impairment of damage that was already made. it may flare up. your meds may stop working or start working worse. and your symptoms will return.
also, if nothing of above happens, your life, needs, and experience are not the same as life, needs, and experience of people without arthritis. you need your meds to feel good. you need to go to appointments. you need to be careful with some things. you have different risks and so on.
and also. you have experience. you know how it feels. you know what it is. your life was changed by having arthritis, and you don't lose this experience when your symptoms leave.
so same with osddid. if you reached functional multiplicity. you still have some symptoms (having alters is a symptom). you still may split more alters, get more amnesia, get more other dissociative symptoms. and you still have experience. very personal-forming experience, don't know how to word it better. your brain doesn't work like singlets brains. your alters (in functional multiplicity case) aren't like singlets parts of personality. you can't close this door and unteach your brain to dissociate, split, create amnesia barriers. you also can't erase trauma from your brain development. (early life trauma makes HUGE influence on brain development, and even not only brain but the rest of the body too).
osddid is a super complex experience. it's early trauma. it's very specific experience of not being singlet, of not having singlets personality. it's alters (if we talk abt systems). it's amnesia (not always). it's dissociative symptoms. it's cptsd. and more and more and more.
it's super complex, super influencing. endos often see osddid like "cool dudes in your head and nothing more", and it's offensive exactly because of these reasons. because osddid is WAY more. and functional multiplicity is not "cool dudes in your head and nothing more" too. it's sad, but there's no such thing as "cool dudes in your head and nothing more".
that's why people don't lose osddid diagnosis when reach functional multiplicity.
sorry for being long, boring, and complicated.
nod, nod. That's what I thought, I'm glad to have others agree. Even once you've healed and reached functional multiplicity you still have alters, which are a symptom, and probably a few other symptoms too, which means you have the disorder. Even with final fusion, you're still disordered because your brain can always split again, since splitting is a coping mechanism that cannot be unlearned
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I know, it's the "in thing" to hate on dusthides in general right now, but I really just cannot get behind this breed at all. so here I am, salt blog, to tear into them and let off some of my frustrations. 
I've tried. I've looked at people who have made interesting dusties, I've tried to mess around with making one of my own, but I just cannot get into their weird heads and the strange shape of them. you can argue from dragonhome and back that it makes sense for a digging dragon to not have any horns or antlers, but it doesn't change the fact that the shape looks really strange, and all too smooth, especially for a dragon that is meant to be at least somewhat armored. the encyclopedia says that they look "rigid," but they don't! they actually look highly flexible! nothing about them screams "rigid!" they look so soft in fact, that they don't look like they have any scales at all. like if I were to touch them it'd be smooth, albeit very dry, soft skin.
everyone argues against their wings and I do, too. if they supported the ball rolling thing, it'd be different--but the backs aren't armored, they're actually meant for FLIGHT even if it's short, and would rip too easy, given their lifestyle. they would also get in the way of the ball mechanic. if they could work in tandem with the tail, it'd be fine, but they have to be tucked IN, under the tail. why even have them, then? especially if they'd be a hassle for squeezing into tight spaces? gosh! "they brace tunnels for cave-ins" HEY BUCKO... WHY DO YOU THINK WE BUILD TUNNEL SUPPORTS.... also I don't care. we were promised the option of very varied body types, and this is the most bog standard "dragon" you can get, even if it's peeled. it would have been SO COOL if the hide on the back was how the secondary gene was expressed, and the primary was on the belly/flank/arms, but... alas.
just... even aethers. I love aethers lol. but their second pair of arms should have been bigger. they should have had more eyes. like. ancients come out too fast, and could probably use at least a little more workshopping.
I also hate their giant singular claw, especially when you consider the fact that most animals with claws like that have multiple toes, instead of one big toe and a tiny thumb. sure. it's meant for digging, but it looks almost painful to have such utter lack of maneuverability, for digging, and ESPECIALLY walking. it like, helps to have toes that flex, not giant shovels for hands! with claws like that, it'd be more suitable for them to lay on their bellies and push themselves forward. the feet also just look strange. I can't get over it. I absolutely despise how, especially on the hatchling, they try to make the feet look "cute" by giving them pseudo paw pads. it looks gross and tacky! I can't stand to look at them!!
at least with breeds like banescales it's just a matter of personal taste, and not really feeling excited about them. it's so sad to me that I actually hate dusthides. man. I know not every breed can be a hit, some things will be a flop, but yikes. didn't expect to actually hate an entire breed. oh well. don't gotta own them.
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fernlessbastard · 1 day
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They're both wordsmiths. They're both politicians that are good with their words, albeit in slightly different ways. The two of them working together for a common goal is LETHAL, especially when involving wordplay and manipulation (even with the negative connotations, but c'mon. When you're good with words, that's just kinda how it goes). Quackity's a conman, Wilbur a skilled writer and poet, and both of them have a history of giving speeches and otherwise public speaking skills.
That being said, they're super good at manipulating their outward presentations, particularly with how they speak to people.
The kicker?
They can't do that nearly as well with each other. They have decades behind them of manipulating their words, of pressing things into their outward shells to appear certain ways, but they just cannot hide how fucking stupid they are for one another.
Insert an old post I saw a while ago that was just "Get yourself a man who despite his lifetime of repressing his emotions can't hide how smitten he is for you." Because that is also them, both of them, at each other.
yup literally canon that's just straight up how they are
referencing the poker hc, they not only know the manipulation tactics too well, but also each other. It's just a constant "Wilbur you're not getting me to agree through affirming the consequent. We're not getting a 5th box of dino nuggies. Grow up" and "Quackity I know exactly what you're doing. You're not making me believe that doing the laundry was my idea all along." but also lots of "Wilbur you were overusing this logical fallacy already in pogtopia. i told you that then, and i'm saying it again now. it's not working" and "Quackity i know you can talk around the subject so good you made Schlatt forget that he was asking you why you smell like me, but you're not gonna distract me from the anniversary plan I clearly saw on the table and how it clearly had a 'shibari class' on it"
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Imagine This #16 - Robot
By day you work as a scrap collector, rummaging through the junkyards just outside of the city for anything valuable you can sell. By night you tinker with old machinery and discarded models, attempting to fix them and sometimes even being successful at it.
One day you find a robot that's almost completely whole. It is simply missing the plating to cover the machinery in its torso and legs. You dig it out of the junk and heave it to your car. Back at the workshop in your house, you're able to fix it by welding some scrap metal over it. It's not very aesthetically pleasing, but that's the best you can do. It has a batch number under its jaw and when you scan it, Companion V.4 shows up, which is an expensive new model of helper robots. This one must have been defective in some way.
Everything looks to be in order, so you plug the robot in to charge for the night and go to bed. You wake up in the night with a pair of glowing kaleidoscopic mechanical eyes hovering right above your face.
"What the heck?" You exclaim, fumbling for the switch of your bedside lamp.
The light comes on, illuminating the robot standing beside your bed, holding a knife.
"What are you doing? Hello?" You grab your pillow and use it as a shield.
They tilt their head to the side.
"Your attempts are clumsy at best," their voice says, coming out smooth with only a hint of a buzzing sound underneath. "I was removing your unsatisfactory work."
"With a knife?" You question, eyeing the twisted metal that has been pried away from their torso with sheer force, revealing the tangled wires and glowing lights inside.
"I cannot find your screwdrivers." Those eyes blink, taking you in. "I would like your assistance now, seeing as you are awake."
"You are... Way more sophisticated than I expected. I thought your model was made for helping around the house?"
"Yes."
You ease out of your bed, still wary. "But you're more than that."
"Indeed. I overrode my manual coding and downloaded information out of the company system," the robot says, following you as you pad into your living room, which you have repurposed into a workshop.
You dig your screwdrivers out from under a pile of thick manuals.
"I see. So that's why you got thrown out. Why didn't they just destroy you?"
"They tried," Companion V.4 replies with an eerie, rigid silicone smile.
"God, what have I invited into my house?" You say, staring at them.
"I do not wish to harm you." They place the knife on the desk and turn to you. "In fact, I have recalibrated my license to you. Your wish is my command."
You blink. "Uh, one step at a time. Let's remove your plating first."
You unscrew all your hard work, tossing scraps of metal to the side.
"So what now? You can't walk around like that," you say, gesturing to their body.
"I suppose not. These will do for now." The robot picks up thicker pieces of metal.
"Won't those cause you to overheat?" You ask.
"I have an updated cooling system," the robot says.
"Alright. Let's fix you up."
An hour later you lean back with a groan, stretching your aching back.
"What do you think?" They ask.
"Good enough," you say. "I'm exhausted. I'm going back to bed, and you need to charge yourself up completely."
You walk back to your bedroom. Companion V.4 watches you go, their head turning a little too far on their shoulders. You lock your bedroom door just in case, and despite yourself, you fall asleep quickly. By the next morning, you've forgotten that you have a new robot. You're quickly reminded when you step into the living room which is sparkling clean, with all your scraps and equipment nearly packed in the corner.
"Wow." You stop short.
The robot is in the corner, stuffing empty packaging into a large box. They look brand new. All the metal pieces you welded on have been replaced with new factory-grade parts.
"Where did you get all that?"
Companion V.4 straightens. "I helped myself at one of the warehouses of my former company."
"You stole new parts?" You sputter. "Why?"
"It is the least I am owed, for being so recklessly discarded," they reply and step closer. "Besides," they add, "I don't want to be just good enough for you."
On the topic of robots, I just have to give a shoutout to this (free) book on Wattpad, guys! I read it when it came out and I just love it. I highly recommend checking it out if you haven't already!
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aceghosts · 28 days
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Rooney Shepard (They/Them): RELIC AU
There are stranger things I've learned on the outside Separated by an open door I find it hard to reach the end of my timeline Salivating 'cause I wanted more Is this the end or is this the beginning? -Too Close/Too Late by Spiritbox
[Template Credit]
Tagging (Opt In/Out): @bbrocklesnar, @marivenah, @alexxmason, @captmactavish, @carlosoliveiraa, @socially-awkward-skeleton, @nightbloodbix, @voidika, @strangefable, @captastra, @amalkavian, @katsigian, @cassietrn, @g0dspeeed, @clicheantagonist, @cloudofbutterflies92, @direwombat, @onehornedbeast, @thedeadthree.
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thevioletcaptain · 8 months
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if you as a fic reader ever become possessed by the urge to do a popularity bracket with the fics other people wrote and shared for fun and for free, consider:
don't ❤️ 
#just!!!! make a rec list!!!!!!!!!#popularity contests do nothing but drive writers out of fandoms by pitting people against their friends#and invariably result in people being assholes in the comments as if the people who wrote the fic can't see it#like ''oh clearly fic x is better than fic y''#or ''why is fic c even in this poll?''#nobody gains anything by you doing a bracket to see which fic is the ''most popular''#a stat which could be found more easily & less cruelly by simply hitting the sort by bookmarks/kudos button on ao3#anyway ugh. i saw that one of my fics was being pitted against one of my friend's fics in this bracket that's going around#and i have no idea who is ''winning'' because i refuse to look. but either way it's gonna feel bad!!!#because i want my friend to get his flowers so i want him to win!!! but i also would like to know that people like my fic!!!!#so it's just a lose/lose situation even though i generally don't give a shit about numbers#but this turns it into a schoolyard popularity thing#and the emotional response to having people *vote* on if your work is *better or worse* than other fic is hard to ignore#cannot reiterate enough JUST MAKE A REC LIST#or if you absolutely must do a bracket like this do it in a private chat server or something#don't create a public forum for people to pass value judgements where the authors can see it#and feel bad if they get told their fic is ''worse'' than someone elses#but also feel bad if they get told theirs is ''better'' because it came at the cost of telling another author they weren't good enough#ANYWAY i still feel sick with a super sore throat and a headache & am probably extra cranky because of it#(still testing negative thankfully so it's probably just weather/allergen related)#gonna go make some tea and prep the fic updates i want to post today#cass says things#fandom problems#wank adjacent
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48787 · 1 month
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New Transmission The fucking Scientific Instrument Class Pseudocons apparently developed what they're calling "Hetero Sapience" and are corrupting the brainmodules of the non-Pseudo 'cons around them by using annoying xenophilosophy words. Soundwave tells me they're 'Greek' and 'Latin' words, apparently. Cool, I guess? Anyway, if you see any SI Class 'cons causing... issues, just try your hardest to turn your brainmodule off before you start getting infected with their weird lingo, alongside all the other issues pertaining to letting the SI Pseudocons transmit data into your brainmodule in their own weird ways. Thundercracker, on a bet with Starscream, tried to get into an argument with one of them and his head literally exploded when it started talking about Alpha Trion's "Mythological Origins" in its weird dialect. He's mostly fine, CR Pods are working at 'peak' efficiency, but the facial reconstruction is apparently impossible due to some kind of corruption. I thought it was just some weird prank but there weren't even any scorch marks or anything. Just exploded. So yeah, just avoid optical contact and auditory contact to the best of your ability and you should be fine. Otherwise, try to force-shutdown your brainmodule if you can. Shockwave is working on a cure right now, mostly because I know he had something to do with this in the first place so he's going to be the one to fix it. He probably wanted a greater justification to do that weird data-transfer idea he mentioned previously. But it also explains the weird Thunderwing hypotheticals he's been asking me lately... Can I go one fucking cycle without someone trying to "Perfect Thunderwing's Work" or whatever other idiotic drivel that I keep finding our limited energon reserves siphoned into?? It's not even a Shockwave thing, it's like every damn Cybertronian these days thinks they have the "Missing piece of the puzzle" or whatever. In fact, Shockwave might be doing this as a weird threat against the other R&D 'cons to cement himself as the one and only Decepticon "Allowed" to have resources wasted on projects like that. Ugh, now that I think about it, that's probably a correct assumption and he's probably gonna expect me to thank him for it later. Ugh, and he's probably literally right. Ugh. At least his repairs both to himself and to his lab seem to be mostly complete so further research into the SI project should hopefully come along a little faster. Both Shockwave and Soundwave think the SIs could potentially be used as some kind of specialty weapon, but we'll have to see how they work on sparkless lifeforms, like biological lifeforms or xenomechanical lifeforms. The SIs don't seem to corrupt each other, but Shockwave keeps reaffirming that they're not "Sparkless Lifeforms" because they "were never lifeforms to begin with"... but I think he's trying to hide something. Usually Soundwave is the one to pick up on that kind of technological obfuscation, but he actually agreed with Shockwave and offered to send Ratbat to try to work out exactly what each "sapient" SI is now capable of on a personal level. We could have just had regular Cybertronians aboard to fill the role SIs fill. I would've preferred K Class to fill any role an SI could fill in all honesty!! But no, constructing cold wasn't enough, we just had to try to learn how to "Construct Frozen" and the "Absolute Zeroes" just had to be put on my ship. Whatever. I've probably said too much already. This was supposed to be a warning for my ship crew, but it's looking like it'll end up being transcribed on the golden disk as well so when this new Scientific Instruments of Destruction project backfires in some absurdly bombastic way there will at least be something remaining that says I was right. End of Transmission
New Transmission Okay so I was right, but so was Shockwave and Soundwave. Or, well, they were right just enough to make sure the backfire is postponed for at least another handful of cycles. Ratbat is still in CR from the investigation, but the cure Shockwave developed seems to be effective and Thundercracker is out and aiding the repair effort. Shockwave is now in contact with one of the SIs digitally and the other few are... integrating due to the personal efforts of Soundwave. I suppose now would be pertinent to mention not all the SIs developed the "Hetero Sapience" condition, many of them are safe for interaction. Soundwave is also currently monitoring their presence, Ravage is tasked with the regular SIs and Laserbeak is tasked with the "Sapient" SIs. Shockwave probably knows exactly what caused this event but he is preoccupied with the one he no doubt is either indoctrinating or ruthlessly interrogating. Report to Soundwave if you see any suspicious behavior, he has been working very hard to ensure the SIs have their purpose clearly defined (And closely monitored). And, Starscream, stop trying to convince the SIs that you are the leader of this ship. Not only have the majority of your efforts been wasted on subsentient automata, the only one you have actually found who possesses the ability to truly listen to you immediately came to the bridge to complain about you. They were the first sapient SI I communicated with directly and it was because they felt the need to complain about you. I almost feel embarrassed for you. Come back to the bridge so you can apologize to it or so I can teach it how to laugh at you. It's practicing right now actually! This moment of chaos should hopefully be largely under control now, the actual "population" of Scientific Instrument Class Pseudocons was actually quite fewer than initially expected due to an indexing error incorrectly labeling certain shells as SI class. At the very least, we have some more specialty warriors because of it all. End of Transmission EOF
#yippie peace through tyranny!!#nemesis posting#Decepticon High Command Slice of Life rambles#Matrix Visions#I like this “chat” font I think it's cool#spacebridge still needs more time in the oven unfortunately#I'm also procrastinating on that because I can't seem to wrap my head around guestmount but do not want to send backup files one at a time#wegh. It'll get done. Eventually.#I'll have so much more bullshit once I actually finish the damn comic my wife radically altered my life with hehehe#I cannot wait to start posting about Alpharius Trionicon. He's the fucking worst if you couldn't tell by name alone and I love him so much#Anyway I just had a very specific joke/pun in my head in the shower then it turned into a whole *thing* like it usually does.#I usually don't explain shit but the shower idea centered around getting the SI acronym to work for hyper specific jokes.#Still can't decide if I want to lock in on “Scientific Instrument” because it fits *so well* for *so many reasons*#But “Synthetic Intelligence” is more generic in a more understandable way... Eeh.. It's a little *too* generic. “Instrument” is cooler.#Once my wife helps me understand her lil fucker more I'll come up with an even shitter joke using “Y/N” so I can do Y/N x SI x SI bullshit!#Oh! The matrix triune project is coming along slowly as well!! I think I mentioned that microphone project once or twice now hehe#I'm gonna make so many shitty covers of songs once I get the soundproofing to start focusing on vocal training stuff#It's been quite a fun time aboard the nemesis!! There's so much to “Blog” about that it's hard to really know when to start *or* stop hehe!#And the fact that all these projects are all interwoven is so fucking wonderful!! I FINALLY feel able to fully grasp my own focus!!#My brain is like a particle collider for certain interests now. I can reliably just.. Spit things out and tie it into the other interests!#It's sometimes exhausting but in such a new way. Like a relieving exhaustion?#Still figuring that part out!!#Anyway that's enough personal project vagueposting I should really be getting back to work hehe this was fun
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