#But im so broken and i cant see anyone mangaing to be with me for more than a month before noping the fuck out
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Did BlackStar turn into a Mary Sue after the Arachne Arc in the Soul Eater Manga?
Anyways, if I'm already in this mood of starting shit, guess I wonder if anyone else feels me on this:
When reading the manga through in one go, I kinda started feeling that - cause yeah the Mifune rematch was great and all, a fitting conclusion to his arc - and thats the problem - he kinda, in the middle of the story, seemingly became his endform, atleast in charachter and competence - so then we get weird stuff like him trashing Crona with no effort even if that scene seemingly should be about how Crona was fucked up by darkness into some hideous strength, but nah BS wins and everyone says how strong he is, and its not like Im either crying about my cinammon bun or whatever not having the highest powerlevel (anime Crona is way weaker by the end and I dont care) - it just makes the scene be convoluted cause BS cant just catch Crona, it would mess up the story, but still he has to be super competent so he actually catched Eruka.
But this is small frys, compared to the part that sparked my previous weird plot suggestion:
Patty and Liz, charachters whose whole arc is connected to Kid, who are shown to train to save him, who have the whole ironic thematic resonance of "Oh he saved us from the madness of the chaos of the streets, we will save him from the madness of Order of the letter" - but naaaah, its more important BS gets in and wins by some nonsense "My power is power" thing lol
And then there is the whole flying thing or shit on the moon like eating lazers and fighting with a broken spine - but that maybe is cool, but the biggest offender is when Asura goes out of the way to say:
"Wow BS is actually THE strongest, and he is like a WARGOD!" - like I dunno, maybe it was "epic" in the moment but combined with everything else, with the fact that not Kid with 3 lines could compete with that even after the charachter development of overcoming his insecurites and distrust of his dad, still BS MUST be the center of attention, as if he was Ohkubos special little guy...
But idk, maybe I should just have kept this too a way deep iceberg entry, still gotta see if anybody else has a simmilar take.
Anyways, to make it more controversial, I think Arthur from FF is what BS tried to be - idk it works for me with Arthur, you kinda get taken by the ridicolousnes and fools faith that transceds reason into the divine, while BS is just the generic anime "Aaaaah Im gonna surpass the gods and slay them with my humanity!!!!"
Oh, also Tsubaki got also shafted by all this too.
#soul eater#soul eater meta#black star#mary sue#idk#maybe I should just stop lol#soul eater iceberg#I should just put this energy into the script#maybe Im missing something important#And yeah he was kinda goofy and a idiot still so guess not#but thats also like the one pseudo negativr trait you give to hide the fact
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Omg babe I've been WAITING for you to get to choso that man is so fine fr 👀 alot of people like the way he looks in the manga better (I'll include a tiktok below) and like I cant help but agree lol but I still love him in the anime 🥺 idk if you've gotten to it yet but the part with geto, choso, and mahito is one of my favorite parts in the entire show like choso is having a full blown crisis and mahito is just being all cute and pouty LOL
Also we need to take a moment to talk about how AMAZING and SPINE TINGLING your toge fic was, the way you made him into an adorable little creep has me in a chokehold rn 🥵 you made him into the EXACT kind of creep I was thinking of too like I love that hes just so in love with you how could he not, hes not just a creep bc hes a bad icky person, he just cant help himself because he has so many feelings for you 🥺 it fits his character so well I love it 😍 I looooved when he just didn't care anymore and started leaving hickeys all over. Even tho it was a dark fic I still saw him as his cute soft self so that took some real talent fr lol. Also the fact that I would wake up and be mad that he put me to sleep like I would have thoroughly enjoyed that sir thanks LOL 😭 I agree about him having the potential to be dark, I mean with his power he could literally make you do whatever he wanted whether you wanted to or not (if he wanted to).
Also I wonder too how dark you can get and I mean if you ever need anyone to talk to about some dark ideas I volunteer LOL 👀 Are there any hard limits you have that you absolutely wouldn't write about/talk about? I love what you said about destroying any limits like sukuna and mahito are definitely your guys to do that lol
Also plssss send more tiktoks if you come across any I'm always looking for more to watch over and over again lol 😍
https://vm.tiktok.com/ZTRUCVXAv/?k=1
https://vm.tiktok.com/ZTRUCXwof/?k=1
https://vm.tiktok.com/ZTRUCVuyQ/?k=1
AHHH CHOSO IS SO SEXY IN BOTH I CANT HELP IT 💀 I watched the tiktok where they clowned on the anime version but honestly I like that one too 💀💀
THE GAMBLING SCENE YES Mahito pouting over the broken little piece HES SUCH A BABY 😫😫😫
IM SO RELIEVED YOU LIKED THE TOGE FIC. I’m glad I posted it, even though I was struggling for a day or two. i know the other characters won’t be as popular but I hope the jjk fandom here on tumblr takes me in soon 🥹 IM HERE TO OFFER CRUMBS
The absolute best part about being an individual with no real hard limits except the very obvious: no children or animals, is that I will write WHATEVER intrigues me. I’ve had some ideas for a Mahito group fic (geto, Mahito, choso, and haruta) so I’m trying to put those down on the doc soon!!
but yes, when it comes to how dark I can get, I can go down just about any rabbit hole so I guess it’s limitless? ALTHOUGH I may also be experimenting with scenarios in my downtime just to see what the darkest, filthiest ones I can come up with are.
IM FINISHED WITH SEASON ONE NOW! Although I did see the movie is on crunchyroll in September 😭 I don’t want to wait that loooonnng
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I know im a broken record but I really just wish I could find some happiness or at least peace that lasts for more than 5 mins when I'm alone
#miranda talking shit#Negative#I just want someone to love and who loves me and to live with them with a cat or two#But im so broken and i cant see anyone mangaing to be with me for more than a month before noping the fuck out#Being told from all places that 'things will get better ' when you've been feeling this way since you were 13 and having had sucidal thought#Since you were 8 is like... Uh... Its been 10 years i.... I have just aged and lost my youth to my illness haha....#Having to come to terms with the fact that youre probably going to be one of those people who doesnt get a good ending is hard#I always love and wish the best for everyone i meet and want to help them but im... Not ever going to find anyone that want that for me#And even if i did i guess i would just deny it or not accept it because i have no right to any love because im like this. Im disappointing#My mom every year that goes by because i cant get an good enough grip of taking care of myself and doing the bare minimum to be alive ... So#I can study or work like hahahah how lame is that? I just want to convince my own brain that i deserve to be alive even if its an pathetic#Life. But it's been over 10 years with medication therapy three different schools and thousands of doctor visits but its the same im the sam#I cant escape the thoughts that i am long overdue. I have expired. Im the rotten fruit left in the fruit isle at a store thats a danger to#All other fruits. I need to die already so i don't make it harder for everyone else. And i have the audacity to feel bad and sad over not#Being loved... The fucking nerve is mind blowing. I hate this i do. And then I'm not bad enough to not consider others feelings if i kms or#Cut mself so i have no way of escaping it. My guilt is literally trapping me here and also wanting me dead its so inlogical i would laugh it#If it wasnt my real state of existence. Everyone has trauma theyre dealing with so why cant i just do it? Because im pathetic and weak obv#Anyone saying im kind is just so untrue too. Im thinking and feeling empathy for anything that is helpless because i am and wish i could be#Saved. Even my kindness is selfish. So i csnt accept anything nice anyone says about me. It isnt true they do not know anything if they did#They wouldn't be able to even look at me. I guess this is all punishment for something i have done in a previous life. I wish I could know#Because having s reason behind all this shit would make my state of mind easier. If theres no reason behind anything then im one excuse low#In my existence and i am just so done with hitting myself against this wall over and over#No not a wall its a box because even if i try other things the feeling remain and i am unable to leave#I am thinking about dying and ending it on a daily basis but everytime someone ask ill say im okay because in that moment they are there#With me so technically i am. But my okay is not okay. My version of okay isnt alright but no one can change it and it would just make the#Other person feel bad so im just fine... Im okay... Nothing happened ...
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i finally got around to reading over heaven.............
some Thoughts below
ok so it seems like not a lot of people like over heaven for some reason?? i think that ive heard they think dio is ooc but i actually think it fits him pretty well. anyway here are some of my Thoughts on it (spoilers, parent death tw, death tw in general)
- dio doesnt hate his mom, obviously. thats made Very clear through most things that he does, and even in the way he talks about her, despite him saying that he was relieved she died. dio has always been a liar, and this time hes trying to fool himself. he just cant deal with her death, and hes just angry that she wouldnt let him stand up for her. hes basically stuck in this eternally angry state of having nothing resolved, because he cant bring her back. thats why he wasnt satisfied when he killed dario, it still doesnt bring his mom back. he cant prove that he was “right” to her, he cant admit that he loves her, and he cant keep her from being “foolish” because shes dead and theres nothing he can do about it, so instead of just admitting that he loves his mom, hes pretending he doesnt so he doesnt have to deal with the reality of her death. when he lost her its like he lost anything good that he saw in the world, so whats the point of admitting that he loves her now, when love would just hurt him?? god i keep thinking about his dramatic “i was burned by the goddess of love” thing hes so ridiculous
- dio cant admit that he thinks his mom went to heaven either because hes trying to protect himself from getting hurt. everything dio does is for the sake of protecting himself, including his emotions and even his stand. the world itself protects him from being hurt from something unseen, as he can prevent anything bad from happening if he pauses time. the one thing that really hurt him was his mothers death, and if he thinks shes in heaven only to find out she isnt, he might just break apart. thats why he said that maybe dario was in heaven. he has to think of the worst possible scenario because if he gets his hopes up, his heart will be broken all over again. its not that he hates her or believes she was too “foolish” to get to heaven, its that he doesnt wanna have to grieve for her all over again :(:(
- VERY glad someone else is upset about that thing speedwagon said to him,,,, even if its just dio himself,,,, no one is Born Evil and to think that something like that could have been what pushed dio to become a vampire............. ooo im gonna attack someone with my hands. anyway i think that maybe dio thought that he still had a chance to get to heaven at that point, as he believed all of his murders were just what he “had” to do. he really believed he had no choice, and so it was fine, he could still get to heaven and be with his mother. but speedwagon asserting that he was born evil seemed to make all of his misdeeds Very real for him, and so he would rather become a vampire and live forever than die, go to hell, and never see his mother ever again. he doesnt say anything like this i dont think, but following his thinking if u look past the way he lies every two seconds, this is probably what ran through his head.
- he only called his mother something Other than mother twice, and it was “mommy” and “mom” and something about it just,,, Breaks My Heart,, i dont know why but that just. Gets Me u know?? i really dont think dio felt like dealing with jotaro and the rest, and i really believe that if he could have, he probably would have saved holly. he was obsessed with the idea of Holy Women, and holly, being a mother and a “holy woman”, knowing she was going to die was probably like reliving his mothers death in a way. it was weird to see him come to some sort of breaking point where he just called out for his mother.... the “mother. mother. mom.” page GOT me i cant Deal with this i am going to Cry
- his reasoning for what he needs to get to heaven is. So Incredibly Strange. not to mention the 14 words that he needs are just from a lullaby his mom sang to him?? i dont think his heaven was seeing the future or anything like that, it was just seeing his mom again, but as stated before, he cant get his hopes up or he’ll just fully pass away or smth idk. i was always upset that the part where dario yells at him to sell his mothers death goes by so quickly in the anime, you can barely tell that thats when dio decided he needed to kill dario. its much clearer in the manga but not many people like phantom blood so............... that Very Big Part of dios character is just kind of. overlooked by most people i think
- this man will NOT shut up about how much he loves hol horse oh my GOD
okay that is all. anyone please talk to me about over heaven i am going to be thinking about it for years. i am Begging i think about dio and his mom So Much,
#dio#dio brando#stardust crusaders#sdc#jjba#jojo's bizarre adventure#jojo no kimyō na bōken#over heaven#eyestrain#eye strain#Just In Case
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Cake and Tears
Hello everybody, this was meant to be for yesterday (day seven).
It’s been a whole week. I hope you guys have enjoyed and will continue to.
Anyway this is a Blue/Red fluff (obvi platonic) I haven’t read the whole Four Swords manga but I have this feeling that Blue would be protective of Red.
Let’s go.
Also TW: mentions of r*pe (ik im an asshole for this plot)
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“I swear to Din Vio, shut the fuck up.” Blue said to the calmest of the four versions of Link.
“Why should I? You suck at this.” Vio spoke, watching Blue. “I will not hesitate to kill you, V.”
Blue was holding the knife he was using to cut, yet another, failed attempt of a cake, to Vio’s chest.
“If Vio dies, we all die.” Green said from his seat on the bench.
“Works for me, means I won’t have to see you guys everyday.” Blue looked towards the green clad hero. “And will you please... get the fuck off my bench.” He shoved Green off the bench as he spoke. “You’re an idiot-”
Vio was cut off by Blue putting the knife back to his chest.
“Fine, kill me, but don’t come crying when you never get to see Red again.” Vio said. Blue’s eyes widened and the knife clattered to the ground. He then crossed his arms with a huff. “I wouldn’t care.” He said.
Lie.
“We know you like Red the most out of the three of us.” Vio said.
“Tch. I do not.”
Lie.
“Oh so you hate him then?” “Yes Vio, I despise him with every part of my being.” Blue laced his words with sarcasm.
“Mhm… turn around.” Vio said with a smirk, causing Blue to turn wearily, scared that Red was there. Instead, he was met with Green holding a perfectly made cake.
“Man! Fuck you for being able to cook.” Blue said with a laugh, taking the cake as it was shoved into his hands. “Yeah, yeah. Now go cheer up Red.” Green said.
“Do I have to?” He whined. If he was being completely honest, which he hated doing by the way, he’d tell them he loved making Red happy.
But that would ruin his reputation.
“YES!!!” Woah, a response from both of them.
Scary.
“Why?” He asked.
“You’re the only one that can cheer up Red when he’s like this.” Vio said, shoving a drink into Blue’s arms before pushing him out the kitchen.
Blue walked down the hall towards Red’s room, beginning to ponder. If he loves Red’s personality, is this self love? Or friendship? Blue ran out of time to think as he arrived in front of Red’s door.
“Red?” He called for the hero.
“Mmmmmmm.” Red groaned from inside the room. No, not one of those groans, you perverts. It was the ‘bitch-I-just-woke-up-fuck-you-want?’ groans.
“Can I come in?” “Yeah.” Red’s voice was hoarse. How much had he been crying?
Blue opened the door and walked in. Red was on his stomach but was facing the door.
“I brought cake?” Blue was so weary, the statement sounded more like a question. “Put it down and get out.” Red rolled over.
“Wow okay, I understand I was pulling Green’s voice but I really thought the tunic would give it away.” Blue said. Upon hearing his voice, Red sat up. “Cuddles?” He asked, reaching his arms out. Blue chuckled. It was quite adorable when Red was like this. He had always acted younger than the other three heroes but it was cute sometimes.
“Of course.”
Red excitedly moved over and patted a spot on the bed, where Blue layed with a chuckle. Red immediately cuddled into Blue, wrapping his arms around the others waist. “Wanna talk about it?” Blue asked. Red shook his head.
“I just want cuddles. Just let me stay like this for a while. Blue nodded silently before hugging Red back. They must’ve sat there for hours, even laying down at one point.
Suddenly Red shot up, looking around frantically, before pulling his knees to his chest and crying.
“Red?” Blue asked, reaching out for the other hero. He flinched slightly. “Sorry, sorry. It’s fine. I shouldn’t be crying. Go back to sleep” Red rubbed his face with one hand, removing his tears as he layed back down. What caused this? How often did it happen?
Was it every night?
Blue didn’t know. But what he did know was that, if Red putting his face into Blue’s chest and hugging him was anything to go off, he was really upset.
“What happened?” Blue himself didn’t even know what he was asking about. Was it about why Red was sad? Or was it about the dream?
“What?” Red asked. (this is where it reloaded the first time)
“What made you upset?” Blue asked, rubbing circles on the red-clad hero’s back. Red tensed up and Blue could basically feel the boy’s blood run cold. “You don’t have to tell me.” He blurted out quickly. “No, it’s okay.” Red took a deep breath in. “Remember that guy I was dating?” Blue nodded in response. He didn’t know too much about the guy, except the moment everyone layed eyes on him…
Blue and Vio did not like him.
Well, in Blue’s case, that’s underestimating it.
Blue hated - absolutely despised - the guy Red was with.
Vio thought it would have bad consequences once they go back together as Link but Blue just hated him. (i cant think of what to name him lmao)
“H-he- he…” Red’s voice became small. “He... did stuff to me Blue.” His voice rose back to it’s normal tone after this. “I didn’t want it. But afterwards, he left without a word.” Red broke down again.
Red was…
No, Blue didn’t want to believe it…
He couldn’t believe it…
How did Blue let this happen to one of his counterparts?
Let alone his favourite?
At this point, Blue had no doubt he was radiating heat considering how much that made his blood boil. He didn’t say anything, scared he would upset Red further, and just let the other boy cry into his chest.
“You wanna talk to Green or Vio?” Blue asked. Red shook his head. “They’ll be mad at me. I knew you and Vio didn’t like him but this? This would disappoint Green too.” Red hugged Blue tighter. “How did I let this happen, Blue? It’s my fault isn’t it? I never wanted it so he just did it...” Red trailed off, eyes full of terror as he recounted whatever events may have occurred.
Seeing that look on his face caused Blue to snap.
“None of this is your fault! He was an asshole that took advantage of you and I’m about this close to beating the absolute shit out of him!” Blue roared, jumping to his feet. “Your fingers are touching…” Red said, realization dawning upon him. “Exactly.” “Blue, no.” The boy wanted to argue but if Red said no, Red means no.
And unlike someone… Blue respected that.
“Okay.” He sat back on the bed, Red sitting next to him.
“What about the dream?” Blue asked. Red became extremely quiet. Blue turned to see the boy with tears running down his face, huddling further into Blue’s side. “You don’t have to-”
“Promise you won’t ever leave, Blue. Promise me!” Blue was surprised by Red’s words. Was the dream really that bad? “I promise I won’t leave you.” He said, looking the other hero in the eyes. “Good.”
Red fell asleep soon after but Blue couldn’t even close his eyes.
Blue had a plan but wanted to wait for Red to be okay with it first
Green walked in the room slowly.
“How is he?” He signed, wanting to be quiet. Blue put his hand sideways and made an ‘eh’ motion. Green just nodded slightly before walking back out.
A few days later
“You still wanna beat the shit outta him?” Red asked. The boy’s mood had brightened little by little over the past few days. He had decided to tell Vio and Green, with Blue’s help of course.
“Yes, but I wanna be the only one.” He looked to Green and Vio who didn’t object. Was his protectiveness of Red really that obvious? Probably. Did he care? No.
Blue stormed into the guy’s house.
“Oh hey Blue, where’s your brother?” Blue had actually forgotten they introduced themselves as siblings. “Not here.” Blue snarled. “Oh what a shame, it’s so cute when he begs for me to stop. Y’know-”
Yeah, Blue just punched this guy in the face.
“Stop. Fucking. Saying. Shit. About. Red. You. Fucking. Asshole.” With each word, there was a punch. Blue was holding the boy by the collar and was relentlessly bashing his face in. He then threw the guy at a wall, a sickening crack emitting from his, already broken, nose.
Blue then got on the ground next to him and kept throwing hits.
“You fucking piece of shit! What the fuck gave you the right to do that to Red, huh?!?!” He was fired up. Given, the guy probably couldn’t respond, but Blue was venting.
He was continuously punching the guy over and over, rebreaking already broken bones from the first few hits. The guy ended up with a shattered cheekbone, the other one also broken, an unhinged jaw, a broken nose, a black eye in the first stages of forming, a few missing teeth, and, no doubt, more than two broken ribs.
Blue dropped him to the floor.
“Fuck you.” He seethed through his teeth before walking out.
Let’s just say, nobody asked why Blue was covered in blood that, obviously, wasn’t his.
END
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This was a rollercoaster of emotions for me to write lol. I’m sorry if this triggered anyone in anyway.
I hope you guys at least enjoyed Blue beating the shit out of the fuckboy lmao.
LEAVE REQUESTS BELOW!
REQUESTS MUST INCLUDE:
PAIRING
TYPE/GENRE/CATEGORY (fluff, angst, etc)
PLATONIC OR NOT
I WILL WRITE ONLY ABOUT THE LINKS (including the ravio, shadow, and requested characters. Will not write about whole other fandoms though)
I CAN DO READER INSERTS IF REQUESTED (no oc’s tho)
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MY THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS ABOUT OUTTAKES 16-18.5 BECAUSE I HAVE SO MANY
We have been blessed with 3.5 glorious new parts to the wonderful Losty Aone/ Mountain Man Series by the wonderful, amazing, awe-inspiring @shhhlikeme and i am emotional and have many many feelings about it all.
Outtake 16
I love that we got to see this from the reeader’s point of view, it was nice to see our losty y/n and see how their feeling. It was a nice break from feeling sad about Aone’s broken heart.
This part made me laugh ahaha
After dating and breaking up with him, Aone had females constantly approaching him. A/N: Not constantly but it felt that way for you ofc lol
the jealously😂, the Author’s note too like “it wasnt like that at all” 😂 this emotional person (y/n) is just blowing up the situation.
and then this:
In other words: They want what you had.
i mean of course they would, Aone is the sweetest boy but only to someone he loves. Aone’s heart is too strong to let waver to someone knew so quick
This whole outtake all i could think about was that Y/n really needs to get back with her mountain man, first they want to break up so Aone finds someone new but then doesnt want him to find someone new. Like cleary y/n is not being honest with herself or Aone.
When they went to the library, ahhh y/n really just imagining the worst scnenarios in their head😂
“Oh,” your stomach flipped. “He looks so cute.” You put on a 🥺 face when you noticed how utterly adorable a standing Takanobu looked
🥺🥺🥺 Aone is always such a cutie, and y/n really broke this man’s heart😭 I know it was insecurites but still. These two are so in love but just wont get back together.
The outfit y/n is wearing😍 you always pick these really cute and sexy outfits and I appreciate y/ns confidence and style but it is not me 😂😂 but Aone thirsting over his girl tho, i would dress up like that if it meant getting looked by Aone like that 😂
I love Aone’s plan, like he is such a sweetheart and he’s making me all soft at all his effort to win his girl back🥺🥺
This outtake really gave up all the feels y/n is feeling with breaking up with Aone and I am enjoing it 😂. At the same time though I just want these to love birds to get back together ahhhhh.
One of the things I really love about this story is how strong the friendship is and how we see the outside characters really show how much they care. A lot of stories (like shojou, oh man you dont know how much shoujo manga ive read haha) just sideline their friends after the start talking to their love interest or they dont even have friends at all in the whole story. I really enjoyed seeing Katana be a voice of reason in our losty’s life. And of course the K_nji’s being our boy Aone’s best friends.
Outtake 17
okay we starting with the real friends the K_nji’s warning our boy Aone about the situation. I love them and how much they care 😂. They can be dumbasses but still, I appreciate their effort.
The University—our University— sent her a uniform that’s a size or two too small.
Does this mean they’re going to the same university? or am I reading too much into it? It might have been mentioned before but I cant remember off the top of my head. Also Aone really living his best life and his worst life rn 😂😂 like he gets to see his girl in a super tight cheer leading uniform and spend one on one time with her but he cant do anything about his desires. His confidence tho haha “I’ve seen Y/N in a cheerleading uniform before” not like this you havent😏
Aone Takanobu can truly say—if he could speak—that he will never even question Futakuchi again.
Again I just really love their friendship, parts like this really get me 😂😂😂
When y/n took out Aone’s jacket automatically🥺🥺 my hearttttt, and how long Aone’s jacket is on them🥺🥺 this whole part made me so softtt. Like imagine wearing his jacket🥺🥺 it would be so comfy and warm.
There are so many golden lines I loved from this part, but Aone’s spank bank is just a phrase I wasnt expectng to read but it is gold. Im sure his bank is full and loaded😂
Then some random gross guy comes up to y/n, like the audacity of this guy.
He had such a disgusting grin on his face
🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮 this guy can back offfff.
I really love when Aone comes in to protect the reader🥺🥺 he’s not the iron wall for nothing too.
Your knight has arrived. Your ex-knight. ☹️
and then you go and hurt me again😭😭
I really wanted Aone to just kick a dude in the chest, like step the fuck off 😂😂.
“Take one more step toward her.” Aone growled in the smoothest voice.
“I dare you.” Aone added, for good measure.
Im absolutely swooning, Aoneeeeee🥺🥺🥺. And the fact that he wanted the reader to come with him so she wouldnt get anyone bothering her😭😭 he’s such a gentlemen. No one bothers Aone’s girl whose not his girl at the moment, especially guys who arent wanted
now onto the fun part of this outtake😏 I wasn’t expecting to see texts but it was definitely a nice addtion!! Our poor Aone soo horny and sweet, I dont know if the dead squirrels worked hahaha.
but he couldn’t help but wonder how he was going to edit all of this together in the time frame he promised he would with only one hand.
this went over my head when i read it the first time omg😂😂😂 Im sure Aone can do it, he’s a very capable man. This whole section had me laughing but also feeling slightly bad for Aone, again his poor horny heart right now is conflicted but very much fed. Im glad he was able to get a break, I dont think his length could wait (im not used to using subtle language hahaha) anyway this whole part was fun to read.
Aone bit his juicy bottom lip,
I legit bit my lip just before reading this part😂
Outtake 18 & 18.5
Now we’re hitting the climax!! (after Aone just hit his climax and is about to hit again😗)
—who imo really should return to their own homes now but would rather not—
I mean do these two even have their own homes anymore😂, theyre basically apart of the Aone family now. Family who also understand when to leave their horny pal alone for time being.
OKAY ONTO THE IMPORTANT PART!!! AHHHHHHHH.
“Aone-senpai, do you even have snapchat?!”
“Obviously not.” Kenji answered for his friend, being snappy.
“WELL HE SHOULD GET IT BECAUSE I SAW—“
Did Kanji see Y/N and Takeru?????? I also cant believe I learnt Takeru was a third year from this series, I always thought he was a second year for some reason. I think cos he was ennoshita’s rival. not important rn lmao
“—because Aone-senpai is jacking off again. It makes you feel lighter, and happier—so that’s why,”
this boy, there are some things you just shouldnt say out loud. Some things can be left unsaid (not like im blunt with my friends sometimes haha but still)
When Kenji had found out about why y/n dumped Aone😭😭😭😭 I’m glad he found out earlier then Aone, I wouldnt have wanted him to yell at the reader again.
Anyone that can do that, be so selfless—is good enough for his best friend.
🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺
“I can tell its her because that’s your sweater she’s wearing. Right? It says Takanobu on the back, and I remember seeing Y/N steal it out of your bag after practice once.”
🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺these parts really just made me soft. like the fact that y/n still had the jacket and wanted to wear it out. and the absolute coincedence that they were in the same cinema as Aone.
“Y/N.—Sh-She-She is wearing my attire. What does that mean?”
Yeah, big guy.
Yeah, you have a chance.
Y/N still has a little….tiny bit of feelings for you
YES YES YES FINALLY , I wanted to cry here😭😭 AND THEN KENJI CONFIRMED IT ALL AND AONE THE MAN WENT AND TRIED TO GET HIS GIRL. THIS REALLY IS THE DRAMATIC PART IN THE MOVIE. AND THEN THIS [redacted] TAKERU CAME AND AHHHHH
(Aone would know that face, he only saw it everyday he’s looked in the mirror for the past 3 years)
Absolutely dead. All hope—gone.
You make me happy and then just rip out my heart like 2 minutes later. I was going from crying happy tears to sad tears in like a heartbeat.
ALSO YOU DONT KNOW HOW UPSET I WAS WHEN I GOT TO THE END OF PART 18 I DIDNT REALISE THERE WAS 18.5 AND WAS AFRAID THAT THIS WAS IT AHHHHHH. I THOUGHT YOU WERE GOING TO PLAY WITH MY FEELINGS THEN JUST LEAVE.
“I’m worried about you.” She finished, looking more serious than you’ve ever seen her.
y/n really has some good friends with her🥺
uhhh then Takeru comes in, I dont really hate him but no one stands in between our losties love, they deserve each other and no one can stand between them.
“But, tonight, if you need a shoulder to cry on, I’m just one theatre over… Okay? I have a pretty comfortable shoulder, so just text me.”
Okay this was pretty nice of Takeru, like cheesy but at least he cares and isnt staring at y/n like a peace of meat he wants to devour...
You sent it. Received a response within seconds saying he was on his way.
This boy, hes got a good heart but this isn’t your story bud, im sorry.
There! Kenji-san and Koganagewa-san, two males who were looking at you and Takeru as if you two were the villains in the movie that just popped out of the screen.
if this doesnt go well these two seem like they’re going to fight y/n outside the cinema😭😂 I couldnt imagine getting death stares from the K_njis especially after hurting Aone basically twice now.
Finding HIM was all that mattered.
OKAY THIS WHOLE PART, LIKE YES GO GET YOUR MAN PLEASE. LIKE Y/N CANT JUST LEAVE THIS RIGHT HERE LIKE THIS.
white hair visible only because his head was down, forehead kissing the steering wheel, his shoulders vibrating slightly because he is crying. It’s him.
I cant take anymore sad Aone😭😭 He needs the biggest hug and his girl to be his girl again. He has gone through so much.
“Kenji-san, please leave me—““Not Justin Bieber look-alike!”
I cant with the Justin Bieber look-alike. 😂😂
Im just going to talk about my feelings for this part, but the whole confesson. I felt like crying, i feel like crying now reading it😭 it was just so beautiful. Like y/n explaing everything and saying Aone is the only man she’ll ever love. Throughout the series we really go to understand Aone’s feelings so deeply and how passionate he is but we didnt really get to see how y/n felt as much so reading this made me happy for Aone for the fact that his girl loves him as much as he loves her. They really were lost for each other, lost with out each other, but together they were
Found.
okay maybe im tearing up now😭😭
One more marathon to go and our happy couple can live happily. The fact that this story is nearly over is a little sad but I’m happy our losties found each other. Im thinking since the next parts will be the last I’ll talk about overall themes I liked and my favourite moments as well.
#shhhlikeme#Losty Aone#Losty mountain man series#this took longer then i expected but i can finally post it!!!!
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aaaand goodbye teruteru
------
the what now
I GOT STUCK HERE FOR SO FUCKING LONG BC THEY GIVE YOU THIS. PILE OF INCOMPREHENSIBLE INSTRUCTIONS AND THEN NONE OF IT MAKES ANY SENSE
in dr1 they had a similar mechanic where you had to hit the buttons at the right tempo to knock out their statements, which was also confusing but i was starting to get decently good at it by the end of the game, but in this one the timing is TOTALLY OFF and i kept missing every single one and couldn’t figure out why, then realized it worked sometimes if i held down the button instead of just clicking it like you do in dr1 (which they didn’t explain!!! in this one!!!) but eventually figured out if i just like. double clicked on the beat i could break them for some reason. i dont know why. it works and i cannot explain how
but then at the end when you reach the final strike, you have to put together a phrase out of four words to refute “where could the weapon have been?” and i was CONVINCED it was “On The Meat Bone” (even though technically it was hidden In the bone i guess) and i didnt realize i had the phrase wrong and thought i just wasn’t hitting it correctly for some reason so i failed this like 6 times before i finally realized it was MEAT ON THE BONE
i understand owari’s not the type to give a shit probably but do you really wanna eat meat off of the skewer that was very recently repeatedly stabbed into a guy’s abdomen
even if he cleaned it off before he put it back thats still like, fucked up lmao
monokuma took care of it though i guess :’ )
kind of alarming that he’s capable of eating now, but
THANK YOU NANAMI
,,,,ok
I WILL SAY that the final closing sequence is WAY better in sdr2, it’s way way clearer what you’re looking for, the blanks give you hints as to what might go there, the picture options give you descriptions of what you’re looking at (frequently i know exactly what im trying to explain but cant figure out which picture goes where bc they’re just. incomprehensible out of context) and THEY FINALLY FIXED THE SCROLL THING :’)
i dont know if its just broken as hell with a laptop trackpad and maybe it works with a mouse (or maybe it’s just not designed for pc in the first place, this was originally. ps vita or something i think) but the scroll sensitivity was SO broken in dr1 i spent most of my time just trying desperately to scroll to the thing i needed without scrolling past it
i still have that problem when im trying to pick which truth bullet to fire but thats not As bad as this part was in dr1 at least
ok so my bIGGEST PROBLEM WITH ALL THIS, is WHY DIDN’T TERUTERU TELL ANYBODY ABOUT THIS
if he Knew what komaeda was up to (and he did, it’s confirmed right after this) why didn’t he just go tell not-togami right away. even if he thought nobody would believe him, that guy would have taken it very seriously since he already was on his guard and knew there was a threat
i mean i guess like. he saw an opportunity to kill komaeda, which he could feel justified about bc he knew komaeda was already planning a murder, and if he got away with it he could escape but that still means he was willing to sacrifice everyone else
like he does give kind of a weak attempt at asking if it counts as an exception because it was sort of self defense (komaeda couldn’t kill him from where he was but he was gonna kill Someone so he was defending. someone) but he still.... knew komaeda was going to kill somebody and made the choice to just kill him himself without warning anyone or saying Anything and then kept that fact to himself too
back in dr1 again we had this similar situation in the first trial where leon actually was acting in self defense (which is Confirmed in the manga, he doesn’t get a chance to explain it in the game) and didn’t tell anyone but like... none of them knew yet if they could get off on a technicality and we don’t know if he might’ve been hoping for that, and he didn’t know sayaka was dangerous, he didn’t make the conscious decision to go kill her without telling anyone. he probably should have asked someone else for help when she lost it but his intention was to get in there to talk it out, so like. he tried to de-escalate the situation and became a killer by accident, teruteru had plenty of time to get help and decided to kill instead. and “hey byakuya i think komaeda is planning something bad” would have been a completely logical thing to do, he would have taken it seriously and teruteru would be innocent in that scenario, vs “guys i think i just killed sayaka but hear me out i didnt mean to” would NOT have gone over well, nobody’s gonna help him or believe him when it’s Sweet Dear Precious Sayaka, naegi could barely believe she attacked him even when they proved it with evidence
i dont know i feel like teruteru had a lot more intent behind what he did. even if he would have been absolutely fucking justified in killing komaeda and i wish he had done it correctly :’ ) i think the “i dont care about taking everyone else down with him” is way more clear-cut here
anyway, goodbye little bastard man
motherfucker
i still CANNOT follow komaeda’s logic here
he’s obsessed with the Ultimates... and believes in them SOOO Much :) he’s desperate to see them overcoming the ultimate despair... so he’s gotta kill somebody... to induce ultimate despair... so they can overcome it... i GUESS???
wouldn’t defeating monokuma and making it out of here on their own strength without resorting to murder at all be the ultimate hope triumph though. what are you DOING, komaeda
what is W R O N G wiTH YOu
well there he goes
i really wish someone would
P LE ASE DO
AKANE OWARI MY QUEEN
its not. clear but im pretty sure she Did punch him
its a crime that we dont get to see this, but
i mean. she’s right
i B U K I
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I’LL REMEMBER // DAY6 Fic
Pairing: Park Jaehyung x Kang Younghyun | Jaehyungparkian
Word count: 2,170
Summary: Jae comes to their old school with Younghyun like what they did eight years ago. He did exactly the same thing they did except for one thing
also posted on twitter
Jae lets out a heavy breath as his eyes scan the area. His gaze drops on the small frame he's holding. He caresses the glass and paint a small smile.
It's been eight years since he last set foot in this place. The last time, he's with the same person he's with right now.
He looks up to take a glimpse of the area again. “Let's go.”
He carefully takes every step as he enters the place. It's where they spent their entire highschool life--their puberty period, where they first had flings, where they first read adult magazines during class, where they first got their hearts broken, where they first fist fought, and where they built the foundation of the unbroken bond they have had.
Jae playfully kicks the pebble in front of him slowly, like how the other did it eight years ago.
“You remember when I first dragged you here?” Younghyun asked as their eyes wandered at the soccer field of their school. “You didn't want to because you want to play badminton or basketball instead. Yet you didn't want to leave when I told you that we should head home.”
Both of them went back to their school two months after graduation day. They want to go to every corner and reminisce everything, keep them in their hearts and treasure them forever.
“My mom scolded me, you know?” Jae chuckled. “My uniform was full of dirt. My face was, too.”
“But then you asked me to play soccer the next day.”
Jae lets his eyes study the area for another minute as he recalls all the fun times they ran around the field, trying to steal the ball from each other, and dropping on the ground when exhausted.
“It was really fun playing with you, Hyun.”
Jae starts walking again, holding Younghyun in his left hand. He halts at the tree near the wash area. He traces the familiar carving on it: JPian
He laughs. “You remember this? Jaehyungparkian. You loved it, didn't you?” He looks at the other with a bright smile. But after a while, it turned into a sad one. “Let's head somewhere else.”
They go all around the campus. Jae voices out every memory he can remember in each place. Like how they both did eight years ago.
Jae doesn't let go of him as they go from one place to another.
They went to their old classroom where Younghyun would always fall asleep during class, write poems in his notebook, or read manga. Jae would always play games under his desk. They would always get scolded every time and were made to stand on the hallway.
They pass by the classroom where Younghyun would always take a peek to see what a senior was doing--a senior he has a crush on. And Jae would always appear behind him and try to surprise him. When the senior would look at their way, Younghyun would hide and Jae would wave a hi with a bright smile.
Jae opens the door of the infirmary. He remembers sitting at the edge on the bed at the corner when he sprained his ankle after jumping when he was playing badminton with a classmate and Younghyun immediately ran to check up on him. The sprain wasn't anything serious but the worried look on the younger's face has triggered something inside Jae. It's as if a candle has been lit up or a switch has been turned on.
“I guess that was the time I realized why my past relationships, or flings, didn't go well.” He caresses Younghyun with his thumb.
He also takes a peek at the science laboratory where they were lab partners and Jae confidently mixed some chemicals that blew up.
Jae smiles as he sees the cafeteria. He recalls how Younghyun would always squeeze himself to get their food. It's always a battlefield there.
Jae does not forget the library, where Younghyun sometimes go to sleep. Or write again. He strolls around the shelves, letting his hand touch the books he pass by, until he reach the last shelf and arrive at the very corner.
He slowly pulls three books at once, the last three on the middle row, revealing a hidden notebook stuck behind the books. It's where Younghyun wrote his poems and songs. His dream was to be a songwriter.
Jae flips some pages slowly and with utmost care. He can still see how bright Younghyun's smile every time he finishes a piece. But no one would seem to give him attention. Although the younger would always keep mum about it, Jae knew about his frustrations. Who doesn't want his talent to be recognized? Or at least be appreciated a bit?
They proceed to the music room afterwards. The first time Jae caught Younghyun there, he was mesmerized. He didn't tell the younger that he knew about his little secret. Jae didn't know why Younghyun didn't want anyone to know that he plays.
The song was soothing yet sad and heartbreaking. Every time Jae couldn't find Younghyun at the library, he would always go here in silent, and he would always see Younghyun sing and play the guitar; or piano sometimes.
“Shall we head to the theater?”
It was the last place they visited eight years ago. And the last place they'll go to today.
Jae's feet are heavy as he takes every step after entering the mini-theater of their school. When his eyes land on the stage, he can feel his heart squeeze.
He takes a seat as his knees are about to give in. He lets Younghyun take the seat on his left. They both face the stage.
“Remember what happened eight years ago?” Jae smiles as he curbs himself from breaking. “I was surprised, too. I really didn't know they will all come.”
He smiles softly as he plays a song from his phone. He places it on the arm rest. He listens to it as he reminisces the unexpected event that happened the last time they went here.
“You're supposed to perform here.”
“Yeah,” Younghyun smiled with a hint of sadness. “But I couldn't come.”
“You were so happy then,” Jae tried so hard not to make his voice crack.
The younger was supposed to sing his own composition during the school festival. But because of unfortunate events, he couldn't make it.
“Of course. I've always wanted for people to hear my piece.”
“Why don't you play it?”
“Now?” Younghun looked around. “But no one's here.”
“I'm here,” Jae locked their gaze until the spotlight suddenly switched on.
They flipped their eyes shut from the blinding light. Their hands in front of their faces to shield it from the light. A figure revealed itself behind it. It's their class president, Sungjin.
They heard footsteps behind them and saw Wonpil carrying a guitar, and Dowoon with a stool. The latter carefully put down the chair and the former handed Younghyun the guitar.
“We're here,” the class president behind the spotlight exclaimed.
As if on cue, people started to fill the theater. Their classmates took their seats and readied themselves to hear Younghyun's song.
There were some familiar faces, too. Their homeroom and math teacher, his favorite, at the side with some other teachers. Their P.E. teacher, who would always scold him, was there, too. Ayeon, the senior he has a crush on. Jieun, his first ex.
Jae nodded at him and motioned him to take a seat and start playing.
“I'm nervous,” Younghyun whispered.
Jae tapped his shoulder. “Don't be. You always tell me to do things with so much enjoyment.”
“As if it's your last,” Younghyun continued and Jae choked a sob.
He shook his head not wanting to think about it. “Not that, let's stop at the ‘enjoyment’ part, okay?”
But that's what Younghyun would always say. “As if it's your last.”
When he dragged Jae to the soccer field. When they first cut classes. When they jumped in the river, still wearing their uniform clothes. Everything Younghyun has been wanting to do that Jae seemed a bit hesitant, he would always say it. “Let's enjoy this, savor the moment as if it's our last.”
Younghyun showed a tight-lipped smile and sat down. Jae went down and took a seat in the front row.
Younghyun took another glance at Jae before closing his eyes and started playing.
In the passing time
You’re fading away now
I’m afraid that I’ll lose you
Even in my memories
Jae bit his lips to prevent them from shaking. He kept on looking away to restrain the teasing tears to fall. No, he's not gonna lose him. And no, he's not gonna lose every memory of him.
The moments you gave to me
They were so precious
I’ll remember
Of course. He will never forget.
Jae could hear some of their classmates crying. Their P.E. teacher kept on wiping his tears, too.
Younghyun was a naughty student. But he sure brought unforgettable memories and made their highschool lives worth remembering.
Just the fact
That we were together
I’ll leave it in a deep part
Of a corner of my heart
(I’ll remember)
Younghyun was alreading shedding tears. At the last line, his voice almost cracked from trying not to cry. Jae stood up and went up the stage.
Younghyun couldn't almost continue the song but was surprised when someone sang the next verse. How did Jae know it?
In this slowly fading picture
You’re fading away as well
It’s sad because
Time can’t be stopped
Younghyun's right hand that was strumming the guitar dropped. He stopped playing and Jae stopped singing. The latter just stood there and let tears leave wet trails on his face.
Younghyun couldn't look up. His shoulders were moving up and down from heavy breathing because of his wailing. The room was suffused with grief and tears.
Jae stops the song. It was a memorable yet painful day. He couldn't stop the time.
“As if it's your last.”
They all knew the possibilities. They all knew that it's gonna be the first and last time they'd hear Younghyun sing and play the guitar.
He was sick. He couldn't come during the school festival because he was in the hospital.
He looks at the man beside him. He holds him again. “I lost many opportunities. And even eight years ago, I never had the guts to tell you what I really feel.”
His hands softly brush the countenance of the other. “I love you,” he sobs.
Jae is now a successful singer. He became one to fulfill Younghyun's dream. “I want my pieces to be heard. Sing them for me.”
Jae's songs were all written by Younghyun. The latter gave him a couple of notebooks with his works when they went back to the hospital after visiting their school eight years ago.
Yesterday, I'll Remember, the song they sang here, was released. He went back here with him to reminisce once again, celebrate their victory, and get Younghyun's secret notebook at the library, which Jae only remembered yesterday, too.
He did every single thing they did eight years ago. He's still with him. The only difference is, he's now with his picture and not the person himself.
Jae embraces the frame before he takes a deep breath and stands up. The notebook resting on his lap falls. He takes it and is about to walk away when he notices a page with a folded part at the top edge.
He opens it and sees his name being scribbled multiple times. Some lines that are probably potential lyrics, too. Like, “You’re too much. Why do you drive me so crazy?” and “What can I do? I’ve already fallen for you.”
Jae keeps on flipping the last pages. There are a lot of lines that seem to be written in hurry. Like an idea just came and you didn't want to lose it. Maybe it was like that.
Jae drops on his seat again and holds the notebook and frame close to his chest when he sees what's written in the last page.
Everything I write is about you, Jae. I have no courage to tell you but I love you. I hope these songs and poems are enough to tell you what I feel.
I'm sorry for falling in love with my best friend. Also, I'm not sorry because that's the best thing that has ever happened to me.
They didn't hear each other say it. Younghyun didn't have the chance to know that Jae feels the same. Jae sobs some more, clutching his chest.
Yes, he won't lose him. He won't lose even a single memory of him. An even now that he's gone, he's still in his heart. And another thing to remember was added: Younghyun loves him, too.
Just the fact
That we were in love
No matter how much time passes
I’ll remember
Because I loved you without regrets
I’ll leave you inside of me
Fics masterlist
#day6#day6 fic#day6 fanfic#day6 fanfiction#day6 jae#day6 young k#day6 kang younghyun#day6 park jaehyung#day6writersnet#kang younghyun#park jaehyung#jae#young k
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there will come a day when i sit a select few friends down to watch something real fucked up just to see them squirm since they like to laugh at me and make fun of me for liking "cutsie girl animes for babies" whenever i make suggestions. it's gonna be My Night to choose what we watch soon n im gonna show them smthn gross bcus they always try to make themselves out to be hardcore horror fans who can handle anything. i did it to my bf who tried tellin me his favorite mangas r way more hardcore and fucked up than mine because he likes berserk and gantz (ya know? entry level gore shit we both got into as kids) so i lent him my copy of lychee light club. when he returned it to me a couple days later he looked broken and said he loves me but knows not to trust me when i say "you like fucked up shit? i got some real fucked up shit fer ya, pal" because that never ends well for anyone but me, an actual sadist who doesnt like bein laughed at.
i've done this w music n horror movies too. ppl will tell me my tastes r weak n make fun of me cus i gravitate to cute things n they always go on abt how i apparently cant handle their tastes. so i do what any person in my situation would do n put on some nsfl shit n i watch it while eating n be like "o shit here comes one of my favorite parts" while smthn absolutely disgusting happens. i've made grown ass manly men who were self proclaimed horror fanatics get up and walk out or openly admit they didn't finish half the movies i watched as a teenager and will not try again, even for me, no matter how cute they think i am. another thing i get is metalheads bein like "idk if u can handle this" n they put on some screamo or shit i've liked since i was a little kid like slipknot so i put on some goregrind or grindcore. it shuts em up real fast when they realize how deep into the pits of hell i'm willing to venture to find some entertaining media.
o shit mayb thats why half my bfs friends r scared of me. lmao nice.
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Bakugou Katsuki is a gryffindor (fight me)
hi its blaise, many of you in the fandom may know me as the argumentative one that like katsuki way to much and you would be right. but @unbreakable-red-riot and i were talking last night and while we agree that Kirishima Eijiro is a Hufflepuff, we differ greatly on my main man, and i am here to set the record straight.
So Katsuki is a Gryffindor.
no okay but he really is. defining characters by the broad strokes of hogwarts houses is a little hard when they’re as complex as they are in bnha. you wanna narrow it down to like Gryffindors are brave and courageous (same thing) and Chivalrous. they’re known for their nerve and determination.
1. Lets first start with Bravery, or courage because bravery sort of just means “to show courage” its a bit whole loopy word circle but
the dictionary defines courage as “mental or moral strength enabling one to venture, persevere, and withstand danger, fear, or difficulty firmly and resolutely.”
we can say, without a doubt that Katsuki is courageous considering he’s the one who has been forced to withstand danger more than any of the other students. And he’s still back at school trying to do the hero thing. and even if that doesn't count we have seen him run directly into danger on one occasion, during the USJ attack where he purposely went after Kurogiri and was one of the 4 students to run towards all might and the fighting instead of away.
2. Chivalry is hard to devine, its a code of conduct mideval knights used to hold themselves too, it was largly informal and subjective and because of that most of it wasnt written down. the idea of chivalry today is “ he combination of qualities expected of an ideal knight, esp courage, honour, justice, and a readiness to help the weak.”
I would like to point out here that “chivalry” as we know it today is actually just a romantic notion propagated by at least three fictional stories and the code im about to past below is just an idealization of historic knights fighting in the holy land.
Gautier's Ten Commandments of chivalry are:
Thou shalt believe all that the Church teaches and thou shalt observe all its directions.
Thou shalt defend the Church.
Thou shalt respect all weaknesses, and shalt constitute thyself the defender of them.
Thou shalt love the country in which thou wast born.
Thou shalt not recoil before thine enemy.
Thou shalt make war against the infidel without cessation and without mercy.
Thou shalt perform scrupulously thy feudal duties, if they be not contrary to the laws of God.
Thou shalt never lie, and shalt remain faithful to thy pledged word.
Thou shalt be generous, and give largesse to everyone.
Thou shalt be everywhere and always the champion of the Right and the Good against Injustice and Evil.[14]
Though these ten commandments are often accepted to be what knights would use, they would not necessarily be what a knight actually followed in the medieval era. This code was created by Leon Gautier in 1883, long after the knight had ceased to exist in its traditional form. Chivalry in a historical sense was more of a subjective term, these laws would likely be seen as good code for a clergyman, however others would hold different ideas on what chivalry truly was.
So i bolded the ones that sort of apply, and taken with our understanding of what we consider chivalry to be, acting with honor, courage, justice and a readiness to help, despite the fact that chivalry as a whole is just a christian European propaganda term that’s been hanging around forever and a day, we can conclude that Bakugou has these qualities, or well, all but one.
He wants to become a hero, so we can thus accept that he is ready to defend people who cant defend themselves, he’s going to school for it so he is respecting the law and will uphold that jutsice, as he hasnt gone outside of it to become a Vigilante which he could easily do with his power and skill level. Bakugou has never backed down from an enemy even when he should have, he is completely without mercy in a fight, He has never lied, ever in the series that i can find. He is generous in that he gave Kirishima the money to replace his broken night vision goggles.
and also we cant even say he’s not ready to help the weak, he is antagonistic to the people he sees as a challenge, he hardly gives the time of day to anyone else.
3. Nerve and determination.
Nerve: a person's mental state, in particular the extent to which they are agitated or worried.
Determination: firmness of purpose; resoluteness.
Bakugou has like, two emotions. he’s either angry or he’s quiet. We’ve seen him scared maybe Twice? in the entier anime/manga and both times, considering he’s 14-16 years old being unnerved is completely justifiable. While Katuki in no way “keeps his cool” he’s never shown to be consierably worried or unsure about what he’s doing, and he’s always acting with a purpose.
so if we were going with “your a gryffindor if you meet all these characteristics” then i should rest my case tbh. but here are the traits listed on the wikipedia for the other three houses
Ravenclaw: characterised by their wit, intelligence, creativity and wisdom
Hufflepuff: valuing hard work, patience, loyalty and fair play
Slytherin: associated with cunning, and ambition (im sensing a bias)
also on a personal note i feel like we can exclude ambition as a defining trait in BNHA because we’re talking about students who had to compete against thousands of other children. U.A. is the #1 ranked high school for heroics and is considered as the top Hero Academy in the world. every year less than 1 in 300 students who took the exams get in. you need to be ambitious to even try for this school.
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SnK Chapter 95 Poll Results
The chapter 95 poll closed with 1,069 responses. Thank you to everyone for participating. Let’s do this!
RATE THE CHAPTER
(1,019 Responses)
75% of respondents had a favorable reaction for “Liars”. Less than 1% expressed extreme dissatisfaction.
I actually loved this chapter! I was kinda meh on the Marley arc at first, but this completely changed my feelings on it!! Seeing everything from the Warriors' perspective is a refreshing change of pace.
Bertolt is the God of Destruction, RBA deserved better, Magath is actually a nice guy, poor Porco has a terrible name and deserves more love
This is the first chapter in the Marley arc I've wholeheartedly enjoyed. I was always looking forward to getting the Warriors' perspective, but the way in which it's been done has been terrible pacing wise, if definitely interesting story-wise; consequently I've had mixed feelings about the recent chapters. But this one managed to really make me feel for the characters and their tragic, terrible circumstances for the first time in awhile.
Good chapter in terms of lore although kinda meh in terms of story development
I liked the chapter, and the Marley thing we are going through, but I would still like to return to the walls
Not the strongest chapter, feels the same kind of "recap-y" that 63 did, but still a solid outing. I'm convinced we're staying in Marley as the main location for the final arc of the series, with the main cast's appearance kicking events into overdrive.
IN A RECENT INTERVIEW, ISAYAMA REFERRED TO MARLEY AS AN “ARC”, NOT A VOLUME. WOULD YOU BE HAPPY IF THE MARLEY PERSPECTIVE CONTINUES FOR AN ENTIRE 16 CHAPTERS?
(1,046 Responses)
We are a fandom divided.
I feel guilty about complaining too much but I really am bitter that I have to wait another month to potentially be disappointed again
I'm kinda concerned where the series is going‚ it seems like Isayama's taking it slow as he's running out of time
As much as i am loving all of this marley pov i do crave for just...idk something else. Like don't get me wrong i love finally getting more explorations of Reiner but it would be better to have some variation: like what about bertholht, why is he a warrior?? and annie; is her dad still around?
I can see why Isayama's doing this, but it feels v e r y s l o w.
I can't believe I'm saying this but I kinda miss eren.
HOW MANY MORE CHAPTERS FROM THE MARLEY PERSPECTIVE WOULD YOU WANT TO SEE?
(1,043 Responses)
48.6% would like to see the Marley Files end in 1-3 months. 25.8% of the fandom is much more flexible. Judging from the write in comment, trust in Isayama is still high.
I would be happy if Marley took over the whole manga
I want the main cast to reappear, but to see them from the Marley perspective
I would've like to get back to the Walldians by now, but I think I'm good for another chapter or two of the Warriors.
I'd like the perspective to switch between marley and paradis
Depends if Pieck is often seen.
Looking forward to seeing the fall of Shinganshina from the warriors perspective
I'm starting to think Isayama will troll so hard. Marley Arc to the bitter end. Sasuga Isayama.
If this means we're going to remain in Marley for a while, I hope we'll at least get to see something exciting soon, like maybe at the festival. So far we've been getting more information than action, so I'd like to return to that action soon. I also can't wait to learn more about the Tyber family and meet the members.
WHICH STATEMENT MOST CLOSELY MATCHES YOUR FEELINGS FOR THE MARLEY CHAPTERS AS A WHOLE?
(1,044 Responses)
Nearly everyone who responded has enjoyed the Marley focus. 39% would be happy with a little more, while 31% liked it but are ready to return to the main cast.
On the negative side, 3.4% said that while it was necessary they didn’t enjoy it. Only .4% said it ruined their enjoyment of the series.
I like the Marleyan perspective, honestly if the rest of the series was like this (with a few chapters focused on the main cast of course) I think that would be great!
I felt the Marley perspective was necessary but I was bored most of the time. And now I'm just desperate to head back to the main cast.
I enjoyed the Marley perspective and I'm fine with more of it but something has to happen because I'm starting to get bored
This series has just been a series of peaks (Piecks?!) and whenever I think that it's surely gotten as good as it can get, they surprise me. The 30 day wait is hellish lately, more so than ever before.
HOW BADLY DO YOU WANT TO RETURN TO THE ORIGINAL CAST ON PARADIS?
(1,040 Responses)
While the previous questions have shown we are patient people, a solid 50% would sell their soul, or at least consider it, for a return to the original cast.
Lemme see the main cast again, but keep the best girl
I would still love to know if Jean has grown some ill-adviced facial hair, but I also love the Marley chapters.
I at least want a glimpse of the Walldians post-time skip! I especially want to see Colossal Armin and if amputee-kun is Eren! I'm okay with a couple more chapters in Marley since I trust Isayama that this part of the story will be important (plus the characters are interesting and I enjoy seeing RBA flashbacks), but I just miss the old crew and want to see what they've been up to the past few years!
I feel like in all honesty, I enjoy the Marley perspective but I'd like to see how our 104th cast is doing. I'd really hate for them to do the same thing to Reiner and Co and recreate Shiganshina.
BOI I want to see the original squad again PLEASE
I love the Marley Arc!
Wake me up when the main casts return
WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE MOMENT OF THE CHAPTER?
(1,038 Responses)
Judging from the write in comments, Pieck is the best girl. 33% of us had a favorite moment that involved her. Seeing the Paradis mission from the perspective of the warriors and the reveal of the Tyber family had 17% and 18% respectively.
tag yourself im zeke being super enthusiastic over pieck
Boooring... except for sasuga pieck. That part made me laugh.
Zeke's subtle way of warning everyone that the room is bugged, and Pieck and Reiner immediatly understanding.
I was excited to learn about the 9th titan, the Tybar family and Zeke praising Pieck. Very heart-broken for Reiner though.
Tired of seeing Marcel get eaten. Its a little repetatitive
HOW MUCH WORSE CAN REINER’S LIFE GET... FROM THE NEW CHAPTERS, WHICH OF THESE IS THE MOST TERRIBLE MOMENT FOR HIM?
(1,032 Responses)
Each new event of Reiner's life is like beating a piñata of misery. Everything is terrible and the sadness candy just keeps spilling out. When the piñata is done, they beat Reiner with the bat instead.
Learning of Marcel's lie, immediately followed by Marcel's death, giving him no chance for closure or resolution
Tough one.. but i say his mom's pressure & the conflict of seeing pradise ppl as normal human being & still having to kill them.
I want some form of lasting happiness for Reiner Braun
#ProtectReiner854
Reiner seems to have inherited Ymir's real titan power: the Complex and
Depressing Backstory Titan
I would like everyone to hug the shit out of Reigner.
Being Reiner is suffering. Seeing his face the page after his own father refused to acknowledge him as human broke something inside of me. Also Galliard is still a dick but I'm disliking him less.
NEW CHARACTERS MEAN NEW SHIPS. HAVE ANY CAUGHT YOUR INTEREST?
(1,040 Responses)
Someone please remind me to never give “Other” as an option for a shipping question :/ I do, however, appreciate that almost 60% of you would like Reiner to have a bit of happiness.
Annie x freedom from her crystal, Pieck x being exactly right, porco x death, Isayama x vague hints, Zeke x tea, Everyone x Happiness (except them motherfucking Marleyans) and my personal notp, Zevi, were a few of the many write in answers.
WHAT IS THE MOST INTERESTING NEW REVELATION FROM THE CHAPTER?
(1,034 Responses)
Last month learning the identity of the 9th titan was high on everyone’s wish this. This month we got it. 52.5% were most happy to learn about Warhammer.
At least we know the 9th titan. Just a decent chapter, Not my favorite of this arc though.
Really enjoyed this chapter, did not expect a mention of the ninth Titan. The montage of the Warriors was really awesome too.
Tybur family's new plot introduction is very intersting! I still think zakrus in pradise is shady as hell.. maybe he'll play a role in pradise fall.. pradise cant be too unified. Marley is not unified either.
I'm so excited to see more of the Tyber family. Their brief scene is drawn in an epic and mysterious fashion - symbols of seashells, flowing robes, a man with a clenched fist and correspondingly flowing golden locks standing before a crowd. I expect them to play a pivotal role in whatever comes.
MAGATH IS SO FAR THE ONLY MARLEYAN WHO HAS ACKNOWLEDGED THE WARRIORS AS HUMANS. HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT HIM?
(1,027 Responses)
Magath is perfectly meh. About 50% of us place him in the dead center between “tiniest gold star ever” and “swell guy.”
Magath is on the Eldians team. He loves and cares about all the Warriors, is possible he loves them as his children...I thought it was cute how he asked them to finish their mission and come home together! Hes like a tsundere "I-Its not like i care about you eldian demons!"
FAVORITE CHARACTER THUS FAR IN THIS ARC?
(1,043 Responses)
Reiner wins by a landslide. I think it comes as no surprise to anyone that Pieck has a solid showing with 17%. Zeke came in 3rd with 9.3%
Zeke's unique & bizzarre nature.. immense cruelty + cleverness + immature nature + bizzare obession of games, playing & his twisted concept of fun! This guy is a very interesting mixture indeed.
Pieck is a great new character.
Tbh the series is kind of getting boring but Pieck is Bae
Reiner has become my absolute favorite character in the series.
LEAST FAVORITE CHARACTER THUS FAR IN THIS ARC?
(1,029 Responses)
Reiner’s dad edged out his mom for least favorite character, but the real news is that 24% of people hate Gabi and Porco even more than Reiner’s terrible parents.
Can i just pick both of Reiner's parents?
Reiners father and mother are both trash i'm taking him away i'm his mother now.
Asshole marley soldier who made bomb noises @ the disabled soldiers
Karina Braun doesn't deserve the hates she gets, she wasn't tricking Reiner...she legit believed ths they would live with his father one day, she really loves him and you see her pain filled face when Reiner lies and says "It was hell"
I like Porkboi more than I'd like to admit.
If I was the Colossal Titan I would find Reiner's father and flip him what would literally be the biggest middle finger ever.
Can't stand Porco. Won't ever forgive him for Ymir. Won't ever forgive Reiner or Bert for Ymir either tbh
HAS THIS CHAPTER CHANGED YOUR FEELINGS TOWARDS THE WARRIORS
(1,023 Responses)
51.2% say yes!
I'm far more sympathetic to them than before, especially Reiner. That poor boy only wanted to have his family together.
Last chapter changed my views about them.
Not much - this is pretty much how I though things would be once we found out about the ghetto and Marley. The only really interesting bits are the new pieces of info, like the Tybur family and the 9th titan.
I've gone from 100% love to 110% love
I feel that this "arc" is being dragged on for the purpose of readers gaining sympathy with them and for me last volume was enough to make us sympathize with them. I have no patience left for this especially when I know the end is closing and there is more to cover and I’m afraid it'll be rushed or that I would lose interest before we reach that part
I feel invested in Porco against my better judgment... and I wonder...if there will ever be a moment when Pieck is not exactly right as expected... :o
I wanna see Bertholt's past!!!!!!
RATE EACH WARRIOR IN TERMS OF HOW THIS CHAPTER AFFECTED YOUR PERCEPTIONS OF THEM
The Winners:
Reiner - 840 people view him more favorably
Pieck - 708 people view her more favorably
The Losers:
Gabi - 151 people view her less favorably
Porco - 161 people view him less favorably
I love RBA. Zeke is interesting as ever. Falco looks like he'll probably end up being a character I'll end up really liking, but he's not there yet. Don't really care about Pieck currently. Hate Gabi and Galliard.
Pieck is love
I wish we'd met Pieck earlier because she's everything.
porco the best
Bardlot is best girl
WHICH CHARACTERS DO YOU GENERALLY ENJOY THE MOST
(1,032 Responses)
Looking back over past polls, support for the 104th has stayed consistent. The real change is with the vets. In early polls, 30-40% of people preferred them. That number has fallen to 12%. I suspect some have left the series or aren’t interested enough in the story direction to take the poll.
WHERE DO YOU PRIMARILY DISCUSS THE SERIES
(984 Responses)
Tumblr 364 (37%)
Reddit 626 (63.6%)
Discord 55 (5.6%)
Twitter 12 (1.2%)
FINAL THOUGHTS
There were more than 500 additional write in comments. I wish I could publish them all. Thank you for sharing all your thoughts!
I'm still not over the serumbowl and how much the paradis cast showed they're really no better than the ones they're fighting against, so I'm really happy to see the side that's been less favored by the narration so far. Bless the warriors, they're all full of personality and I already love them.
It was rlly heartbreaking when Marcel tells the truth to Reiner and he deludes himself saying: ""wtf are you talking about Marcel? I WAS CHOSEN BY MARLEY, i don't believe you"".The Armored Titan is the only thing hes got...
Next chapter is a recap of the old arcs with Warrior POV I can bet my seafood on it.
This and chapter 94 have been my favorites so far. Please give me more Reiner, more marley, more warriors, more everything. Isayama I love you.
LOVE THE WARRIORS! On a more serious note, im very curious about zeke and his true motives.. what is he trying to accomplish? I also really wish that his relationship with eren can be expanded on. Zeke told eren that he would save him. Does he to some degree care for eren's own life? Or is he just after eren's powers? Regardless, i find zeke fascinating.
Good but background could have been better incorporated with both sides
I'm loving the Marley arc. We need the other side of the coin and this really shows that evil can be grey. Neither the islanders or Marley-Eldians are really bad...they're just all raised/brain-washed in different settings. I really enjoy the added layers fo Reiner.
These few chapters have been really interesting, but I hope to see our guys back on Paradis, unless Amputee-kun turns out to be Eren and the other Survey Corps have infiltred Marley. Would love for the story to continue from that point of view, but with flashbacks as to what happened in Paradis. Really interesting chapters overall, learning about the 9 titans was really hype.
I hope that Isayama gives us an ending almost as great as ATLA. Each character gets a proper conclusion & the entire story is satisfying. I want AOT to go down as one of the top 10 solid anime/manga of all time. I have faith in Isayama but still the future is unpredictable.
I hope we get to see the attack on Wall Maria from the warriors pov next chapter. And I was disappointed that Amputee guy wasn't in this chapter.
More Marley please. Even if some are salty not to see the Walldians, I think it's very enlightening to see Marley and Warrior perspective on this. As would say Bertolt : "no one is at fault" and, in the same time, each side has their fault.
I've been rocking with this arc and loving it, although I've generally had little complaint with any arc of this series, I love everyone :) But I think some development for my favorite characters and their side of the war is backed up by some subtle set-up for the climax of it all. For all that some people are desperate to see the main cast, I think this kind of exploration is necessary, not just for emotional investment, but because it gives us a look at the world the Walldians are so desperate to get to. It shows that the battle is only just beginning; Marley is not the endgame boss, and in fact it might be the only thing standing in the way of total destruction for all Eldians. How do they deal with that? Seeing that from the Warriors' perspective gives it reality and weight.
I am enjoying the Marley perspective, but I'm having trouble with the pacing. These past 2 chapters are moving so slow. And even though Reiner is my favourite character, I wish we wouldn't have such a huge focus on him chapter after chapter. It's becoming a bit repetitive, and I would rather learn more about the other warriors. I am looking forward to seeing RBA's pov of the attack on Shiganshina however. :)
Shit's heatin' up! Woo!
I am such a fuckin' slut for all the Marley stuff. I have been dying to see everything from the Warriors' perspective since the initial reveal of Marley and honestly I live on the tears of everyone bitching about how there's too much Marley. EMA are pretty much...... the most boring characters in the series so I am livin' this up. Give me more.
MORE MEMES PLEASE (and a bit of main cast too)
can i see more bardlot creating titnas???? please answer this one question!!!!!!!
Waiting for Annie to come back. Any moment now.
It's a good chapter, I'm enjoying seeing the flashbacks and the distinction of the Titan powers. On a smaller note regarding that, I wish they'd tell us what makes the Female Titan "female."
Very good chapter, but it feels like one that's setting up for the rest of the volume. I'm looking forward to this festival as well as getting even more details about the warriors' mission on Paradis
Headbutt of Love copyright Isayama
A relatively good chapter, but I reallllllly want to see the main cast again. It doesn't have to be from their perspective, but I just want to see them again after a 4 year time skip.
We will most certainly remain on Marley, but the perspective will soon shift to the main cast when the rest of them arrive to backup Eren and trash the festival in which the Tieber family will present the plan to capture the Founding Titan.
I can see why Reiner had all that plot armour now! Learning more about the warriors (RBA etc, not the new kids :/) has been really interesting and a much needed flesh out of their characters.
I enjoy seeing more of Reiner (cause he's da best) and learning more about his past and the world outside the walls. I would love to see him decide that he's done with Marley and doing things against his moral code (cause let's be real he probably is totally against this shitshow). I know he'll die and that makes me sad so I'm trying to enjoy whatever time we have left with him. ;_;
No doubt next chapter will show the Wall Maria breach from the Warriors' perspective. I only wonder how much of the flashback will be shown in a single chapter.
I hope we get more backstory on Zeke. There's still so much about him that's mysterious. More of him interacting with the other warriors is always good. I really really REALLY need to know what his thoughts on Eren are. Does he still plan on "saving" him, whatever that may mean? And how much does Pieck know?
When will we see giant naked people punch each other again?
I feel sorry for all the warriors but they killed so many people that I cannot see them as pure cinnamon rolls that need to be protected, for me they will always be morally grey.
I love that we are finally getting details about the warriors. This was something long in the making. I can understand where fans of the main cast are coming from, but you just have to have patience until we see the main cast again. For a story like Attack on Titan, which is supposed to be morally grey, we have to have insight on both sides of the conflict. It would have been extremely stupid if Isayama never delved into the warriors background after all the stuff that they had did. The timing of the switch may have been wrong, but I would rather have it now than not at all.
More Marley, but not at the expence of our heroes. It's Shingeki no Kyojin after all; not Yoroi no Kyojin
This arc has introduced the grey into the world of snk, I no longer see any one main character as bad or good because they all have the reasons with them, although perhaps some unjustifiable it still causes me to think about whether this person is a truly bad person or not. It really makes it quite difficult to favour or not favour people, however I do find that it makes it a lot more interesting.
I love these chapters, I really like the depth isayama is going for the viewers to know that this war isn't black and white and it really shines light on the complications of war and who really is the victims of not only war but also being the victims of a manipulative government.
I think this was a very powerful chapter, it had a lot of revelations and hints about the near future events. It is more clear than ever that the clash with the Paradis people is coming very soon. I am not sure how much more of RBA and Marcel heading towards the wall are we going to see though.
I can't shake the feeling that the "Tybur" family is connected to both the Tiber river (i.e. the fertile crescent--Garden of Eden imagery galore!) and Thor's hammer. Isayama likes to pull from both biblical sources and Norse sources for his world-building and I'm curious what's going on with this name.
this might have been my favorite marley chapter (which still isn't saying much but there you have it)
Seeing as I love the Walldians and Warriors equally, I think it's fair to give the Marely side attention. How can we have a dazzling final battle with no build up, including parallels and foreshadowing in this arc? Worse comes to worse I'm sure Isayama would just add the extra chapters he needed to in order to finish the story. Let's enjoy it while it's still being published.
Isayama is trying to make us think that there aren't good sides or bad sides. And he fails. We have already seen the perspective of Marley and they are clearly the villains. Not the Eldians of Paradis. The reasons why the mainland Eldians are supposed to hate Paradis Eldians are absurd. No real life social group/ethnicity is that stupid to believe what mainland Eldians believe. Or what they do to other Eldians.
As usual with every first chapter of an SnK Volume, this chapter was kind of boring, but we did learn about the ninth titan and the family thats been in possession of it. Also, seeing all 6 of Marley's titans on the battle field at once is interesting.
I think this volume will focus on the build-up to the reveal of Amputee-Kun in the present day, whilst also showing the road to Trost from RBA's perspective, which will be awesome
The perspective change felt rushed. I wish everything about the inital time-skip to the ocean had been handled differently. We got no closure whatsoever on so many important happenings and character developments re: serumbowl and basement, and that really frustrates me. The second - 3 year - just rubbed salt in the wound. I want to enjoy the Marley arc, I really do, but this just frustrates me a lot.
Snk? More like Attack on Game of Thrones.
I really do like the perspective of the warriors and as interesting as it is, I just can't get myself attached to the characters, and that makes it tiresome for me. At the beginning I was hopeful, but so far the only Warriors I can relate to are Pieck and Falco and even that's a thin line. I am eager to see them interacting with the main cast though!
This chapter in particular was great. There's so much subtlety in every action and foreshadowing of things to come. We got a lot of interesting info (the Tybur family, 9th titan, shifter memories, TONS of Reiner background, and Porco feels ahhhhh), and also saw how the warriors are operating under the stress that Marley is putting upon them. I especially loved the Zeke's tea meeting. Zeke's aware that they're being monitored and is able to subtely warn the others, who all get it except Porco, and Reiner then saves him from saying something dissident about the Tybur family and possibly Marley. The interactions of the characters are wonderfully done, with a lot of side glances and small details to pick up on. I think Isayama's character development and world building abilities are shining so brightly in this arc. And I can't get enough of the warriors, new or old. Overall, this is swiftly becoming one of my favorite arcs so far. Also please Isayama, stop torturing Reiner, give the poor man a break ;-; My heart can't handle anymore....
Less flashback plz
I just want to find out if Amputee-kun is Eren that's all I freaking want Isa.
I don't want to spend the entire rest of this arc with Marley, but I think it would be cool to first be reintroduced to the main cast through the new character's eyes. Of course, then we'll need to see things from the main cast's perspective again and find out what they've been up to this whole time
Love the new memes. =P thanks pieck and zeke
to be honest, i expected the 9th titan's reveal to be more epic art-wise
I think I am now more on the side of the "Warriors" than the main cast on Paradis and this thinking of mine is keeping me awake at night. I hate Isayama for this because now his "there's not bad or good side in the story" statement hit me in the face. Also fuck I have the need to hug smol RBA and know finally seeing their backstory and situation withe all the hometown and warrior thing was all I was asking for so I am loving this Marley arc but at the same time I wanna see the main cast so badly.
I want to see amputee Kuns plan.
Poor baby Armin is the god of destruction no soft boy :(
I want to learn more of Bertolt's backstory... He's my fav next to Reiner and we know next to nothing on his backstory and motivations.
There won't be an invasion of the island. The islanders will invade, instead.
Knowing each titan's function is good. But I feel isayama could have used the page more efficiently, like not drawing large, single-panel images of titans. I feel it's kinda wasteful to use up your pages that way with not so dense information given out.
Confrontation between Warriors and SC will be super interesting but I'm kind of apprehensive about actually seeing it. It can easily turn into another serumbowl since we don't have clear enemies and everything is relative.
i feel isayama is just making some poor decisions in an attempt to make reiner more likable and while the new perspective is interesting it was introduced far too late in the game
I do find this arc interesting and I would be okay with it going for a lot longer, however I'd hope for a few chapters which go back to the 104th's in between those chapters, just a little show of where they're at during all this, I miss those guys, its been nearly half a year since we had a chapter with them.
I love reiner yo he needs to be protected at all costs. But i do wanna know more about berholdt and his family. Please i need some closure on my tol boy.
I can't wait to see Historia again and see what role she will play throughout the rest of the series. To be honest, I'm concerned for her because now that she is publicly known as the queen now, Marley might try to capture her if they find out. And what will Reiner do if that happens? Ymir is no longer around to protect her so now it is his turn to owe something to Ymir. I wonder if Historia will ever meet Porco, I hope she kicks his ass, I will never forgive him for ending such a beautiful relationship.
No one is talking about this but the part where Magath says something about Zeke saying unnecessary things in the meeting has me very intrigued. I wanna know what he means, I'm overall very interested in the role Magath may play in the story. Looks like he is the only one suspecting Zeke at the moment.
These chapters have been interesting and I'm in no hurry to get back to most of the main cast, but I would like to see Jean again soon. And Armin.
You know, this was a pretty boring chapter, all things considered. However, I did enjoy seeing Gabi look a bit more "human" for at least a couple of minutes and hope the Falco vs. Gabi bit isn't drawn out for too long (I feel it could get tiresome after a while). Reiner's father honestly surprised me; I didn't think we'd get to see him at all/that Reiner would even be aware of who he was, and yet...we got his perspective and I could not have been happier with what we got. Poor Reiner, but considering his scheming selfish mother (who may also be pretty delusional), it seems fitting.
Pieck and chubby cheeks baby Bertl are the only good things in this depressing arc
Reading Isayama's interview about wanting to change perspective to blur the line between hero and villain made this arc less jarring to me. However, I really want to go back to the main cast. Also, the basement reveal ironically made the series less epic in my eyes. Mainly because the idea of a war
AND FINALLY
As expected of poll-chan, excellent questions!
I enjoy these polls and i have nothing else to say
Come back Momtaku!
<333
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HI!!! i like to request ALL of the flowery asks! btw i LOVE ur blog and maybe u????? idk 🌸🌸 (jk i love u alot)
who is this????????/ under cut bc i get rambly
azalea: what’s one word that describes you?
lame lmao
baby’s breath: what did you want to be when you were a kid?
honestly? my answer’s like yours jen because i wanted to be an astronaut but also a vet and then a few years later i wanted to be something else of a whole different profession but now i know what reality is like and i have no clue what i wanna be whoops
begonia: are you a messy or clean person?
i hate seeing my desk/workspace be messy but i cant bring myself to clean it up either???? bc im lazy
bleeding heart: has your heart ever been broken?
hMMMMm mmm idk i dont think so
bluebell: do you drink tea or coffee?
i drink tea more than i drink coffee but i drink water more than i drink tea i drink water like. everyday lmao obviously but i drink a lot of water its my brand now
buttercup: what are five things that make you apologetically happy?
what does this mean why is the word apologetically there i cancelled it lmao no negativity in this house
my favorite people (u know who + my friends)
when people answer my anon asks and . they respond with a long reply/seem really happy responding thats my fav fam
this is getting real anime but when i get an UR/4* from scouting
finding an anime/manga/book that perfectly suits my taste
im very tempted to just say water bc idk what else 2 say
calla: what’s your favorite book?
ive only read 3 whole books this year but i recommend all of them
challenger deep - neal shusterman (i could go on about this book for days honestly its so interesting and even though its told by the same person it has two kind of perspectives because there are two settings, that didnt make sense but this book is my new favorite)
see you in the cosmos - jack cheng (i love this one too because its just so warm? made me a little emo but its really good and i love how unique it is, text type wise)
a monster calls - patrick ness (this was something i heard from my school first so i didnt know if i really wanted to get it but its actually pretty good?)
carnation: what are your five most played songs?
i cant really check using the music app bc i added the songs at different timings so itll be inaccurate ill just do most played song from each band/group
again - astro (this is their best song dont @ me)
letting go - day6
all in/stuck - monsta x
death by a strawberry - dance gavin dance
check yes juliet - we the kings
chrysanthemum: what are you afraid of?
i may not b a child but im still afraid of the dark bc my imagination is wild im also afraid of bugs and disappointing others nice oh shit im also afraid of asking for things
daffodil: what’s your astrological sign?
capricorn
dahlia: what’s your favorite band?
this question was made for me its day6
daisy: which ‘friends’ character do you relate to the most?
ive never watched friends
dandelion: are you an extrovert or an introvert?
in between!!!!!
geranium: how has your day been?
its been good!!! i managed to ask my mum 2 take me to hair place so i can get it cut finally and im working on updating my tumblr pages and doing all my tags
hydrangea: what’s your dream job?
pass
iris: who’s your celebrity crush?
pass
lavender: what’s one of the best gifts you’ve ever received?
oH FUCK FAM my friends got me a kermit toy for my birthday i lvoe it 2 dEATH
lily: what’s something you’ve achieved that you’re really proud of?
i got first in my class once wow amazing that was 2 years ago i wish i was as good as the me from 2 years ago
marigold: what would you like to do more of, but don’t ?
well i want 2 b more hardworking but guess thats too late
morning glory: are you an early bird or a night owl?
now that school is over and i have no reason to wake up early ive become neither which is saddening because... i like waking up at 7am on weekends and doing things early but now i wake up at like 9-10am and i still sleep at 11pm
orchid: what’s the last movie you saw?
i really dont remember?? maybe uh guardians of the galaxy?? i dont remember who i watched it with and when but it was good actually i remember who i watched it with nvm
pansy: do you believe in love at first sight?
i dont really believe in romantic love anymore
peony: what does your url mean?
chicken fetus means an egg
periwinkle: what are you thankful for?
god get ready folks im gonna go on my biggest boxy rant ever...
so boxy is my friend who ive been mutuals for over a year and our first common interest is love live and haikyuu so we had that to talk about but im bad at keeping conversations with ppl on tumblr so that ended quickly but earlier this year or late last year i made a twitter and told people on here about it and she followed me and i didnt really mind/pay attention to the stuff she posted/rted uNTIL. until that fateful day... june 25th... at like 8pm? she rted a pic of mister brian kang with dumb minion glasses on and ok maybe i do believe in love at first sight? bc wow!!!!! whos this dumbass with minion glasses and the fluffiest hair ??? so i slide into boxy’s dm.. expecting an explanation and she gives me a good one saying how brians from a band (i would later find out), day6 and im not a fan of kpop, never have been.. ive only watched like some kpop mvs bc i love my friends so i expect myself to listen to them and get over them as soon as im done. boxy my friend, bless HER she sends me all of their mvs from congratulations to i smile and i watch the first one - i smile and me? i start smiling and i can feel myself getting excited because holy fuck theyre a band! they play fucking instruments??? and at this point im already whipped then i move onto how can i say and that shit blew my mind let me tell you.. so because of boxy... i get to where i am now, proudly stanning 3 groups and if it were not for her i wouldve never gotten into mx as well... boxy is just?? really important to me her impact is just that great?? so im super!! sUPER thankful for her and i dont think she’ll ever see this but boxy i love u thank u so much!! boxy gave me more than one reason to live, and not just exist?? without her i wouldve never been able to make so many (like 2 but hEY) new friends and this probably got so long idk im just really thankful for boxy thank u lord for blessing us with boxy (@/youngkwhom on twitter) (kittenma on tumblr) i hope shes happy forever and i also hope she has good days for the rest of her life?? boxy deserves it i lvoe u boxy
petunia: where were you ten years ago?
10 years ago i was like 6 probably watching pokemon or some shit and getting glasses
poinsettia: where would you like to be in ten years?
dead thanks
poppy: what’s your online persona?
i dont understad the meaning of persona but an egg??????
rose: who’s the last person you spent quality time with?
all my classmates in an exam hall for 2 hours, quality time indeed
snapdragon: what are your goals?
pass
sunflower: what’s your favorite quote?
i think i had one before but i forgot so maybe it wasnt my favourite lol idk i dont have one now
tulip: if you had three wishes, what would you wish for?
for all of my favourite people to be happy forever
a good future
i want astro, mx and day6 to get an award for all of their hardwork thanks
violet: what’s one thing most people don’t know about you?
i was gonna say smth negative but lets not hm m m i? ?? ill put smth irl ppl probably dont know either uh hhh i guess?? that i eat a lot?? but also get full really quickly but then really hungry right after that idk thanks digestion
zinnia: do you believe in magic?
no ????/ idk is there any evidence that magic exists
JEN !!! thank u so much for asking even tho u probably asked just to get back at me but this was still fun ask memes will never get boring bro,. i love u and i hope u have a good evening also i love ur blog too moon anon probably already told u
to anyone who actually bothered reading through this mess - thank you and i hope you have a good day/night too!!
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TW to anyone who likes Killingstalking LOL
okay, so I decided I am going to make a legitimate post as to why I dislike KS, instead of just shitting my opinions cause I am pissed. I will mention a few things before I start. The first being, I am not accusing fans for being abusive, I understand you can read things of that nature and understand it’s wrong. For example I read Stephen King often, and there has been rape/abusive situations in some of his stories, although it is portrayed in a ‘correct’ way persay. Secondly, I have been in abusive relations in my life, so keep in mind that’s where I am coming from. I have been sexually abused and manipulated to shit as well. And third, this is a PERSONAL/RANT blog, stated so in my bio. With all of this in mind lets dive in shall we?
First off, the characters are incredibly one-dimensional and just nothing special. The whole reason of Sangwoo becoming a murderer/kidnapper/rapist ? is the fact that he was abused by his dad as a child, and he wound up killing both his parents off?? So for some reason this leads him to have mommy issues and constantly brings up weird shit to do with his mom while raping/having sex with Yoonbum. There is a point where he is in his shirt and says something along the lines of ‘nice and warm like im in mommys tummy again’. Like what the ACTUAL FUCK? They also portray Yoonbum in such a shitty way where he���s either super in love with Sangwoo, scared shitless of him, or just doesn’t give a heck. Which is such a bad portrayal of people in these situations, and honestly disgusts me. Another point to bring up is the fact that people SHIP them, which is so screwed up. I don’t care if sometimes Sangwoo is ‘nice’ or ‘decent’ to Yoonbum it will not and does NOT erase the fact that hes raped him, broken his legs, is manipulative as hell etc. Rapists should NOT be given a second chance in any situation.
LET ME JUST BRIng up THE HORRIBLE REP THIS GIVES TO GAY PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!! I cant tell you how many times I’ve seen posts like ‘OMG yoonbum and sangwoo r my gay babbiesss omgee’ like fuck, if you really think this is what a gay relationship is you need to stop. Not to mention if yoonbum was a female I’m sure people would go wild and see how it’s abusive then.
I just don’t understand how anyone can be supportive of this manga and continue to read, create fanart, cosplay, and post about their love for this awful manga/webcomic whatever you want to call it, and not realize how fucked it is. And I have said this once, but try being in an abusive relationship, I genuinely wish anyone who thinks this manga is okay, ships the two main characters, or doesn’t think theres any sexualization or glorification, sees what an abusive relationship really is. It isn’t fun cute or something to read about in your spare time, and shouldn’t be deemed as so. ThANKS
also if you are going to respond to this stop being like ‘omge ur so fucking edgy XD ur makin me cry ur wishing abuse on people so UR wrong and ur also calling us all rapists u evil person’ and think of legit points as to how this manga isn’t fucked up.
also heres literal receipts of sexualization/normalization/glorification of this shit thanks
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all of them
woooooaaaaah thats a lot but thanks thatll keep me busy for a while!!
1) What images do you have set for your desktop/cell phone wallpapers?
me and my bf
2) Have you ever had a crush on a teacher?
nah
3) What was your last text message?
“nice :D thats my boy haha”
4) What do you see yourself doing in 10 years?
oh god i really dont wanna think about it i mean ill be 30 then meaning ill be an old ugly hag with nothing to live for :/
5) If you could be anywhere else right now, where would you be?
somewhere warm where ive never been before or with someone i love
6) What was your coolest Halloween costume?
i went as magenta from the rocky horror picture show last year that was really cool
7) What was your favorite 90s show?
i didnt watch tv in the 90s yet, the only things i know are some 90s anime but i do really like those generally
8) Who was your last kiss?
my boyfriend
9) Have you ever been stood up?
nah
10) Favorite ice cream flavor?
uhh i like nut flavours and mango
11) Have you been to Las Vegas?
nah 12) Your favorite pair of shoes?
brown brogues with thick lighter soles i love them i cant wait for it to be warm enough to wear them again 13) Honestly, have you ever cheated on your significant other?
no 14) What is your favorite fruit?
figs!!! i also rlly like mangoes and peaches
15) Have you talked to anyone on tumblr that you could see yourself dating/having sex with? If possible?
nah
16) Are you into hookups? Short or long term relationships?
still havent figured up how exactly a hookup is defined, generally both can be p nice i guess but i gotta really really REALLY like a person to even consider a relationship
17) Do you smoke? If so, what?
yeah tobacco and a fun stick every now and then
18) What do you do to get over your anger?
nothing i should probably figure out some method for that sooner or later haha
19) Do you believe in God?
nah
20) Does the person you’re in love with know it?
yes
21) Favorite position?
as in sex position? spooning and that legs on shoulders thing 22) What’s your horoscope sign?
cancer :/
23) Your fears?
MAKING A WRONG DECISION!!!!, aging, missing out on stuff
24) How many pets do you have? What kind?
2 cats 25) What never fails to turn you on?
woah idk man
26) Your idea of a perfect first date?
im not really into that whole dating concept but lets say dinner and drinks
27) What is something most people don’t know about you?
dont think there is anything tbh
28) What makes you feel the happiest?
the people i love and the beauty in the world
29) What store do you shop at most often?
grocery store probably haha
30) How do you feel about oral? Giving and/or receiving?
its nice but neither is really like my fav thing ever you feel me? 31) Do you believe in karma?
nah
32) Are you single?
no
33) Do you think flowers or candy are a better way to apologize?
depends on what the person in question likes better
34) Are you a good swimmer?
i guess? i used to swim a lot as a kid
35) Coffee or Tea?
while tea has more to offer taste-wise i need coffee to function so if i had to decide on one for the rest of my life im gonna have to go with coffee
36) Online shopping or shopping in person?
shopping in person
37) Would you rather be older or younger than your current age?
younger
38) Cats or Dogs?
cats
39) Are you a competitive person?
oh i can be
40) Do you believe in aliens?
yeah duh
41) Do you like dancing?
kinda but i have zero sense of rhythm :/
42) What kind of music to you listen to?
thats a broad field lmao i esp like classic rock but it ranges from anime music to opera so idk
43) What is your favorite cartoon character?
homer simpson? haha
44) Where are you from?
the glorious danube monarchy
45) Eat at home or eat out?
eat out when im with others and at home when alone
46) How much more social are you when you’re drunk?
like 5 more social
47) What was the last thing you bought for yourself?
i gotta be really stingy rn but it was energy drinks 48) Why do you think your followers follow you?
i have no fuckin clue
49) How many hours do you sleep at night?
8+
50) What worries you most about the future?
everything hahaha
51) If you had a friend that spoke to you the same way you speak to yourself, how long would you be friends?
we wouldnt i guess lmao
52) Are you happy with yourself?
no
53) What do you wish you didn’t know?
there is nothing i think
54) What big lesson could people learn from your life?
dont drink on an empty stomach and dont try to be yourself ever
55) If you could live in any home on a television series, what would it be?
oooh thats tough
56) What’s your favorite Website?
no clue youtube??
57) What’s the habit you’re proudest of breaking?
i have never broken a single habit in my entire life
58) What was your most recent trip of more than 50 miles?
woah no clue whas that teneriffa a year ago?? woah its been long apparently
59) What’s the best bargain you’ve ever found at a garage sale or thrift store?
once at an anime convention i got a limited edition manga (only 500!!) for like 2 euros
60) What do you order when you eat Chinese food?
i always try to order something different but im usually into stuff involving noodles beef or seafood
61) If you had to be named after one of the 50 states, which would it be?
i dont know all the states
62) If you had to teach a subject to a class, what would it be?
german as a first language
63) Favorite kind of chips?
not so fond of chips tbh
64) Favorite kind of sandwich?
avocado toast? salmon? tuna? caprese? idk
65) Which do you use more often, the dictionary or the thesaurus?
no idea
66) Have you ever been stung by a bee?
no
67) What’s your favorite form of exercise?
strength training i fuckin hate cardio
68) Are you afraid of heights?
not particularly
69) What’s the most memorable class you’ve ever taken?
no idea
70) What’s your favorite breakfast?
just an apple or something
71) Do you like guacamole?
they call me avocado girl
72) Have you ever been in a physical fight?
yeah as a kid
73) What/who are you thinking about right now?
my bf
74) Do you like cuddling?
yeah!!
75) Are you holding onto something you need to let go of?
dont think so
76) Have you ever experienced one of your biggest fears?
i am in fact aging as we speak
77) Favorite city you’ve been to?
prague, vienna, lisbon and berlin are the first to come to mind
78) Would you break the law to save a family member?
yeah i guess
79) Talk about an embarrassing moment?
once i puked into my crushes garden on his birthday it was very funny
80) Are there any causes you strongly believe in?
nah
81) What’s the worst injury you’ve ever had?
had to get stitches on my lip once bc i fell on the playground :/
82) Favorite day of the week?
friday!
83) Do you consider yourself sexually open minded?
sorta yeah
84) How do you feel about porn?
not my cup of tea
85) Which living celebrity would you like to know?
bob dylan maybe??
86) Who was your hottest ex?
only have 1
87) Do you want/have kids?
please no
88) Has anyone ever told you that they wanted to marry you?
nah
89) Do you get easily distracted?
oh yeah and how
90) Ass or titties?
lmao
91) What is your favorite word?
i have several but most of them are in german
92) How do you feel about tattoos?
i really like them and i do wanna get one but not anytime soon bc i dont have any concrete plans yet and absolutely no cash
93) Do you have any pets?
yeah
94) How tall are you?
160 cm :(
95) How old are you?
20 :(
96) 3 physical features you get complimented on a lot?
eyes, figure, breasts
97) Is there anything you’re really passionate about?
love and beauty??
98) Do you have trust issues?
i dont think so
99) Do you believe in love at first sight?
nah
100) What are some words that you live by? Why?
do everything as much as possible but also dont make a wrong decision ever
it makes everything very complicated and quite a mess
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hit every third question
this was hell to try on mobile so im getting to it now
3: Fears: uhh Not To Get Deep but never being a mother,, but more common ones..just like.......any bug that isnt a ladybug/moth/butterfly/rolly polly, clowns....throwing up yeee
6: 4 turns off: um oh jeeze. no hygiene, not being interested in my hobbies, and just plain no care for anyone or anything really. i dont care for physical turn offs seeing as 99% of physical features are things you cant change or itll take time/money and thats not fair
9: My best first date: so u mean my first first date bc i had never gone on any until me and ben went to chuys LMAO..but that bc it was nice to go to the first chuys with him :3 i mean that whole day was a date basically but ye
12: What time were I born: im pretty sure it was sometime late at night, like around midnight - 4am
15: Favourite quote: “i dont know fuck shit”
18: Do I use sarcasm: yea
21: Shoe size: depends, i can go 7.5 in some shoes, but usually 8-8.5
24: Favourite style of clothing: comfy, basically my aesthetic is like, goth tomboy but i like to get into Cute as well
27: Favourite movie: excluding any of the lotr, zodiac
30: How I feel right now: i have old lady body ..so bad
33: My relationship with my parents: p good
36: Tattoos and piercings I want: no tattoos really, i used to, but nips would be cool
39: Do I ever get “good morning” or “good night ” texts?: most of the time, though goodnight is usually over the phone
42: How long does it take me to get ready in the morning?: depends, if i dont have to shower/wash hair, like 45 if im not rushing, if i am like 20.
45: If I were drunk & can’t stand, who’s taking care of me?: i dont get drunk so oof
48: Am I excited for anything?: to edit this video tbh
51: When was the last time I hugged someone?: that wasnt family?? uuuhhh january of last year fjdshgshfs but hopefully soon again
54: What is something I disliked about today?: my neck hurts
57: What’s my strangest talent?: what does that even mean fjdslj
60: What was the last lie I told?: not to be edgy but that i was ok bc i didnt want them asking questions
63: Do I believe in magic?: not really
66: What was the last book I’ve read?: im counting mangas so komi-san
69: What was the worst injury I’ve ever had?: prob when i took a chunk of meat on my shin
72: Is there anything pink in 10 feet from me?: yes
75: What do I think is Satan’s last name is?: big boy
78: What would I want to be written on my tombstone?: vibe check
81: If the whole world were listening to me right now, what would I say?: i would screech like a banshee (dude idek what kind of questions these are chances are if i said something someone would kill me on the spot)
84: What would be a question I’d be afraid to tell the truth on?: none really idk besides maybe to my mom but even then its like im 24
87: Bought condoms?: yea
90: Kissed a boy?: yes...n i would like to again........
93: Had job?: yea
96: Had sex in public?: a long time ago
99: Did drugs?: ^
102: Am I a vegetarian/vegan?: no
105: Been to a wedding?: yes
108: Been outside my home country?: no
111: Broken a bone?: yes
114: Been in airplane?: a long time ago but yes
117: Had a crush on someone of the same sex?: once when i was 14
120: Lost my virginity before I was 18?: yea unfortunately
123: Voted in a presidential election?: hahaha
126: Met someone famous?: no
129: Been fishing?: no
132: Broken a mirror?: no wtf are these questions
135: Was I named after anyone?: my middle name was after my great grandma/the same as my grandmas middle name
138: Favourite Tv Show?: it was gotham but oop
141: One of my scars, how did I get it?: my cat scratched me
144: Am I afraid of heights?: no but i wont willingly put myself up high
147: What I’m really bad at: idc dude living? i have like borderline crippling anxiety most days LMAO
150: What I’d do if I won in a lottery: get tf outta here thats for sure
153: Something I fantasise about: this being over bc it took me almost an hour jesus
some......of these are really weird and i swear i remember this being on myspace
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I just didn’t know...
So, not a lot of you really know me. I think most people follow me for the Critical Role, and gaming stuff I repost from other people. I hardly ever post something myself. And because of this, and because i feel like i need to atleast write this, this is the best place to put it. Its ok if no one reads it, but here it goes.
I have always had a big imagination. I was always the quiet, A honor roll student that always obeyed her parents, and wanted nothing more than to make them proud. While making homework and whatnot, i would watch my older brother draw. He is an amazing artists, and i remember feeling like nothing compared to him. He was better than me at everything i loved. Art, video games, he had a big group of friends that got together almost every day. The only thing i could do better was coloring. It also really annoyed me how my brother would draw these amazing pictures, but in the faintest pencil markings. I was always telling him, “You draw so awesome! Why not make it noticeable enough for people to actually see it?” He always shrugged and said that he didnt care if people didnt see it. I did care. I always looked up to my brother, and i wanted other people to know how good he was. So i asked him if i could make his drawings darker, by giving them a second pass of my own. Not altering the drawing, but simply making the lines darker. He agreed. So i started drawing his drawing all over again, until they were noticeable. Then he would ask me to color them, and i would. He got to sell a lot of his art at fairs and stuff.
I did have friends. I had a group of 4 guy friends in elementary school, who i spent lunch reading Harry Potter books with. I also had 2 girl friends that were my neighbors, who i would “play” barbies with. They would bring their Barbies and all their accessories, and i would bring my Link figurine. The one you could order from the OoT Zelda pamphlet. It was so boring... All they wanted was to dress up the dolls and all that. I wanted to have adventures!
Never happened with them, or my friends in school.
Later i moved to the US, and i went to middle school, where i met my future girlfriend. I remember so vividly that she said i looked like a whore for dressing up in a dress for a school dance. She was not a good person. But i stuck around. She was different and we would talk about anime and manga. We had this thing that we would do during class in which i would draw a stick figure on a page and pass it to her, who would add a stick figure of her own, interacting with mine. If was amazing! It didnt matter what either of us added to the page, the other would just go with it and continue adding to this story we made together.
Heh, you could say that my first OCs were literal stick figures.
We continued friends until high school, where something strange happened. I say strange cuse i dont know of anyone else personally that did this, other than us. I started embodying my OCs. I would say that “Cyn” was in her room, and someone else was possessing my body for the time being. But not just anyone, it was my own characters. People i thought would be best suited to face things than little meek me. Be it school stuff, family stuff, working out, ditching class, even my personal relationship with my girlfriend. She was also doing the same. Acting as her own OCs. I dont know how it started, but it just did. and we kept it up for a long time. All through high school, really. Up until she broke my heart. But it was strange because the girlfriends relationship was between some of out OCs, but not all of them. Some would actively ignore the other, while others just wanted each other in more ways than one.
I cared so much for her, that i allowed her to rope me into her family drama. It took over my life so much that i had completely replaced my own loving family with her broken one... I say that she broke my heart, and she really did. But i feel like it was the best thing she could have done for me. Experiences with her made me grow up from the perfect little girl that makes her parents proud to a girl that apparently had split personalities.
When she left... I was kind of lost. Having so many personalities out in the open as someone else taking care of my problem didnt work anymore. I didnt want to sound like a crazy person by telling people, “Im not Cyn, im _______.” I realized i had to grow up and admit to myself that it was just me, and i was being the person i wanted to be with the excuse that it was someone else. Because i was nothing. It took me years to get over that. I still sometimes find myself talking to one of my personalities, having full conversations and confrontations. I still feel like it helps me.
Anyways, when me and my grilfriend broke up, i found a new friend. She and I were part of a group of friends that self-published a manga magazine. We organized some OCTs and all that. It was cool.
In one of those OCTs, i met a guy from the other side of the world. We started RPing with each other and started creating this world together that i loved so much that we opened the chat RP to other of our friends from the OCTs. It later turned into a forum RP in this cute website that ran for 1000+ forum pages. If you could see us. All sitting at a table with out computers, like a LAN party, but were just RPing in type. Waiting for each other to post our next thing, and refreshing the page over and over again to keep reading the story.
Eventually, the forum story reached stagnation with the other characters in the story, so me and my friend took it out to a two person roleplay chat once again.
We roleplayed with each other for 6 years. This consumed my life just as the other personalities did. I would be with family, but my face on my phone, roleplaying and creating this world that it was just ours. And it was built for years and years, building upon the world i had created since elementary. It was this amazing place that only the two of us knew.
Then i started watching critical role and i wondered if i could do that! Roleplay with other people, maybe bring them into my world.
My first DM experience was typical. I over prepared, and made the encounters so hard that my friends ended up just abandoning the mission and not wanting to play anymore. Atleast not with me as a DM.
I was nothing again.
So i let my friend be the DM, and i became a player in the world i had helped create for years. Mostly because she didnt like how i was managing the world myself. She wanted control of it, so she took it. I felt like shit about that, but i was not going to be a petty as her. This was just a game. It was not going to mess with the ‘canon lore’ of our imaginary world no one else knew as well as us.
Anyways, it is predictable that we had a falling out, and strangely stopped talking over night. My family had always told me how they felt like my friendship with her was holding me back, and i was determined to not allow that to happen. The loss of her friendship would not stagger me. I am stronger than that. I am strong.
......
I started DMing again. With only one player. The one guy from my group of high school friends that i would have never expected to stay friends with me or willing to face my crazy world alone. But he did! I felt like an idiot that i never took his friendship seriously. He deserved better from me. (btw, Hi, dude!) I DMed a game for him for almost six months, until i felt confident that i knew how to DM better, and he felt like he needed help.
I decided to not invite people we already knew... This was something new, me opening my crazy and letting people play in the world i would escape to in my mind. People we knew would judge me for being broken. Strangers would get to know me like this, and hopefully understand that this is normal for me.
This was the best thing i could have ever done.
I made that world my own. I erased the places that hurt me and replaced them with adventures and so many new faces. NPCs. Names of people changed, their stories changed, I changed.
Now i have a group of players that have just finished the first campaign in my world. A 2 year long campaign. And they wanted to return to that world immediately, now having started Campaign 2 without even missing a single session. Not only that, but they ask me for extra sessions! They cant get enough! They are excited to be there and experience the story i will present them! I didnt know... people would like it.
I asked them what kind of DM they would describe me as. They agreed on “The Depressing DM”. The one that makes them face harsh consequences and situations that challenge their morality. I... I didn’t describe myself as happy until i dropped my old relationships, when out on my own with my world, and found new adventurers. I have always felt loved by my family, but i never thought others could love what i do. I still cant believe it is real. I am actually happy. They want me around because of who i am, what i do, and what i give them. I wished i had known sooner... But i am glad i know now. I am so grateful for my players, my friends. Thank you for welcoming me with such open minds, and joining my game. You guys make me happy. :)
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