apparently I’m the only one out of the 100ish students my lab instructor has who names their files logically. it’s just Lastname MainPointOfLab PrelabOrLabReport which makes sense??? what do other people do
Am I the only one who thought cation rhymed with nation until I took my First Real Chemistry Class™?
a throwback to a long time back when I was at uni and went on a nice long walk around some of the local area… and some chemistry notes from first semester than I was revising yesterday… ✨
yesterday was weird… I had a pretty normal day… but the evening I locked myself away from everyone really and entered a tough space mentally… but here I am - I started today trying to move forward slightly and work through today in a better mindset…
unfortunately things have taken a turn for the worse and today has been very tough… I’m still here yes… but I’m very numb and weak mentally… I won’t provide an insight as to why as I don’t want to be too negative -
this is bad enough as it is… but I deeply apologise to everyone for seeming down or … I’m not sure what.
I really miss a few things right now… due to circumstances and personal situation stuff at home too … including:
- face-to-face teaching
- music rehearsals (my goodness give me orchestra and chorus back pls)
- being busy and motivated
- feeling like even if I don’t have a purpose, I have stuff to do that’s important
- love (oops - never thought I’d miss it after my (one and only) relationship a few years back… but… finally in the past few months… the loneliness has hit… but I’m not good enough for anyone anyway ahaha)
- friendship (?)… wishing I wasn’t such a shy (?) person and tried to talk to more people instead of just not and hence isolating myself further…
don’t get me wrong I really do care about my friends and family… but an important note on this post… you never know when someone will just turn their back on you (I have major trust issues and they just get worse :’)))
I hope you’re all doing well… much love 💕
So….I haven’t posted since the 13.03…sorry. Just with everything going on, life has been - for lack of a better word - stressful. I’ve also decided to not us the “c” word but instead take inspiration - and idea - from the game grumps and call it the backstreet boys reunion tour.
As most school I know have done, we have moved to online classes. They are okay. At first teachers weren’t looking for evidence, but recently they have, which is sort of annoying. Also the online classes themselves are okay, we only have two: chemistry and biology, and the teacher who does the biology one is so boring, so it’s always annoying have to sit through them. But the chemistry one are great, one lesson our teacher even showed us his bees and he also put videos on our google classroom of his bees. And for where we are in each course; for maths: they wanted the resultant forces booklet done (so a start on mechanics); biology: we have mostly finished the course, it’s just about making notes; physics: I’m going to be real, I have no clue. I haven’t really been keeping up with physics; and finally chemistry: we have started energetics, which are okay, some of the concepts are a bit weird but it’s mostly GCSE content. If I’m going to be real, this entire time I’ve been in self-isolation, I have had no motivation to do any work whatsoever, which is not good. Teachers are not sure whether we will get predicted grades or not, some of them are banking on predicted grades while others are still teaching the course because knowing CCEA they could just make us do all of our exams next year - both AS exams as well as A2 - so hopefully, it will be predicted grades.
I also participated in this challenge called the C**** challenge (i refuse to even say it at this point) but it is basically a challenge where young people (in A-level or university) who are interested/doing STEM subjects can work together to help fight the backstreet boys reunion tour (by fight, I mean they asked us to come up with an idea that can help people). It was stressful. We literally got put into teams and given ideas on what we can base our project around 5 days before the presentation had to be submitted. 5 DAYS! So yeah, it was stressful, but we got it done. Our idea was a necklace that basically tracks how close you are to other necklaces and if a person was recently diagnosed or showed symptoms (has tickets) to the backstreet boys reunion tour, then if you came in close enough proximity to them, you would get an update telling you to self-isolate. I personally didn’t really like the idea because of the feasibility but when you only have 5 days to make an entire presentation, you just got to go with it. Also I didn’t mind because I got to make SIR models and they were fun - yet very annoying because I had to plug in over 300 values for it to work.
I have also started to relearn the violin. It just sort of dawned upon me that I wanted to learn an instrument and I already had a violin so why not? So, I went on a face time with my friend who does music A-level and has grades in violin - I don’t know what grade she on is now - but she helped me tune and then I started learning. I can already play dawning of the day, as the deer and kerry polka, and even though I should learn to perfect those first, I’ve already started to try and learn Zelda’s lullaby and song of storms. But it’s fun and hopefully, if I do a couple of grades in it, it will give me something to put on my CV.
But yeah, sorry for the long time without updating, but I’m in a better place now, so hopefully I’ll start to update more regularly. But how are yall coping with the self-isolation?
SCORPIO + TAURUS
“The planet Pluto, God of the Underworld, rules over the Scorpio man. It deals with his subconscious mind. On the other hand, the Taurus girl is ruled by the planet Venus, the Goddess of Love. This celestial body influences her compassion and devotion.”
First and foremost, I used to admire the traits of a Scorpio male because of their all-or-nothing kind of character. I find their posessive nature very flattering and they can be extremely territorial too. This zodiac is ruled by Pluto the planet of transformation and regeneration, and Mars the fiery planet of action and energy which makes the man very dedicated, hardworking, faithful, stubborn, passionate, brave and violent. They are a fixed sign which makes excellent leaders so they will want to dominate the relationship but because they are a water sign, they live to experience and express as they manifest their emotions differently than other water signs (Pisces & Cancer).
On the other hand, Taurus is ruled by Venus the planet of love and attraction so they share traits of beauty, artistry, hedonism and a love for luxury and comfort which makes a Taurus female practical, loyal, passionate, materialistic, hardworking, reliable and possessive. However, they’re more notoriously stubborn than their other earth signs (Virgo & Capricorn). Taurus is an independent nature who is industrious and will stretch to any extent to finish the task successfully.
As a Taurus woman myself, I met my Scorpion King on a good friday (10th of October 2019) when we saw each other on the escalators while I was going to the upper floor and he was going lower floor. Unexpectedly, he went back up again just to approach me because we used to know each other but only talked for awhile so it has been so long since we contacted or met. I was stunned when he patted my back, I’ve never had anyone so interested to talk to me, I was lost in words. There was a spark inside my mind that I didn’t know how to explain, it was a feeling that I had never felt before. Being a curious cat, I then took the initiative to exchange numbers to get to know him. When we messaged, I noticed he appeared a little mysterious as he did not open up much about himself yet so eager to know about another person’s story but he provided me comfort that I couldn’t find a reason to not be an open book so I told him I just recently lost the lady whom I called Mama and he consoled me like no other guys ever had before. Later I asked when he was born and he said 12th November, therefore, as somebody who is ruled by mostly brain and not heart, I decided to take the risk that following night based on whatever knowledge I have from studying the compatibility of Scorpio male & Taurus female so the rest is history!!
We have strongly been together for 6 months and 2 weeks now — We managed to make this far by dropping our egos and embrace forgiveness in our relationship. We went through MANY ups and downs as I expected but I am driven by willpower to try to make this work and vice versa because we do genuinely love each other. We may values different things, hence why we are a good example of opposite attracts, but I am not gonna let that stop us from loving each other. Putting ALL negativity aside, he is a romantic guy and the way he protects me from all the worldly problems is something I always adore him about, I need comfort and he gave me security as well which is a surplus. I believe we are determined to withstand the forces that threaten to tear us apart for a long-term chemistry. I had 2 relationships before but the way my Scorpio man loves me is breathtaking. Sweetheart I know you’re reading this, I wrote another poetry for you ;
He is handsome in his own way, still he charms me like the first day, I am so in love with him in every way, that I just couldn’t find another word to say.
I honestly don’t know what the future holds, nobody does but all I know is I love him so very much and the most that he is so dear to me. ❤
Yours truly, Alya
8 April 2020
I’m a huge fan of chemistry. But my other braincell believes that the only chemistry anybody should have is with God.
Messy biology notes featuring my favourite mug!
I hope you’re all doing well and taking care of yourselves during quarantine!
I feel so fortunate that the biggest struggle I’ve had during this time is mild depression and lack of motivation but I can’t imagine what everyone else is going through and it fills me with so much heartache to know there are people who are dealing with so much pain right now. There are teenagers stuck in abusive or unsympathetic households, there are people trapped with abusive spouses there are people who can’t visit their sick family members or can’t afford to pay bills. People who’ve lost their jobs or been evicted and countless, countless other things and my heart goes out to all of you.
Please know that you are not alone. I know everything is dark right now but there is a light at the end of the tunnel, stay strong everyone xx
Advance reading 1/3 for pharmaceutical inorganic chemistry starting with gastrointestinal agents
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8th april | 6/100 days of productivity
my new lamp came in the mail (my old lamp requires a very specific bulb from a store that won’t be open for a few weeks due to the lockdown)
i can finally study past sunset lmao
finally cracking open the ap psychology textbook and crunching through some chapters ahead of the exam in may (cutting it close ik but hey)
i spent a couple hours last night researching and evaluating sources for my history ia. all in all, i have about twenty sources so far, and hopefully more once i can access the public library.
i remain cautiously optimistic
Not my most tumblr worthy notes, but definitely enough work to post 🥵 I’ve got finals right around the corner and my prof decided to throw in one more exam a week before the final. Wish me luck
back at it again at my desk, writing this godforsaken NMR paper. yall know I LITERALLY figured out one of the most important things about one of the spectra TODAY and it’s due TOMORROW
ugggggghhhhhhh anyway at least the gidle comeback was amazing
can you not
call self hatred “edgy”
my chemical equation
i dont know how
i havent exploded yet
currently studying some chemistry, focusing on quantum numbers. I have been sleeping all day because new puppy left me exhausted, but hopefully I’ll be able to regain my motivation! ☺️ be safe you all
listening to isolated system by muse