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#Cain Greene
gildedlead · 3 months
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Duke: …So, is Two-Face like, B’s ex or something?
Steph: I think it’s more of a situationship? They still seem to have some feelings going on there.
Jason: Yeah right, and get accused of cheating on Selina? I think not. They’ve been dating for as long as I can remember.
Dick: That’s…strange, cause I’m pretty sure he and Clark are married. Big Blue gave him a ring and everything.
Damian: A Kryptonite ring. One that Father keeps in a lead lined safe with the rest of the alien’s bane. Besides, everyone knows Mother’s laid her claim to him already. Only a fool would interfere with such a union.
Cass: Talia and Bruce are about as divorced as two people can be.
Tim: No, you guys are all missing the point. If we want Bruce to have a partner, we need to pick the most profitable option for us. [ pulling up a PowerPoint ] Hear. Me. Out.
—-Later, At the Watchtower-—
Oliver: Bats, why are your kids inviting me over for dinner?
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fakeicecubes · 4 days
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Reasons why the rest of the JL believes Batman and all of his children are metas/cryptids
-Weirdly good instincts
-They only see the bat and kids at night
-Hasn’t died
-If they have died, they came back within the year
-The JL has seen all of them at one point or another stay up for 96 hours straight and act semi-normally
-One time Batman was stabbed and started bleeding green(it was slime Bruce packed for kids to play with if they were at a crime scene)
-Red Robin didn’t cry while watching A Dogs Purpose for Young Justice’s movie night(he did, the mask hid his tears)
-They all know an absurd amount of Golf facts
-Somehow none of them age
-All of them are friends with a super
Wonder Women has the list and they update it after every mission.
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ktkat99 · 11 months
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Headcanon that the real reason all the other Justice Leaguer's avoid Gotham is because there is a running joke with the Gotham press that every hero in Gotham is either Batman, or a Robin.
Superman stops an attack drone from burning down a city block?
NOPE! News headlines read "Is Robin's new ability to fly proof he's really a vampire??"
Black Canary busts a smuggling ring?
"Batman's second female Robin. Will she last longer than the first?
Green Arrow catches a bank robber?
"Green Robin's facial hair and exactly what citizens think about it, page 3."
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Submitted by anonymous
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mikeluciraphgabe · 1 year
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Part Five master-post
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I giggled making this one
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Another chapter of my "The Wayne's on Twitter" AO3 work
Masterlist of Tweets
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<- Previous Next ->
13 - The Waynes decide to be chaotic on Twitter
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hungryfictions · 1 month
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sharon angelia
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@lipking - interlude
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petra collins - cherry blossom girl
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ralph heimans - the mosaic floor
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eva green in the dreamers
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marie legall on instagram
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mary qian - stillness of days end
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teethmag.net - thoughts and prayers for ethel cain
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serge marshennikov - calm
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incorrectbatfam · 1 year
Conversation
Duke, to Bruce: So what's going on between you and Green Lantern? I'm sensing some tension.
[later]
Duke, to Cassandra: I didn't sense any tension, I just wanted to start some drama and I figured Bruce and Hal were a good start.
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clambuoyance · 11 months
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[DC] commission dump :) ty to everyone who commissioned or donated! 💜💜💜
Here is my Ko-fi! I’m leaving it open for now if you’d like to drop in a request, but I’ve raised it a bit and will probably take a little longer to go through them so just keep that in mind 😔🙏
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ivymess · 6 months
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my personal rendition of the “women of DC” art by adam hughes i believe?? i drew this ages ago, but i remember i had so much fun picking out the style of dress for each lady :p
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kazuaru · 1 month
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Yassifying randomly generated sims.
inspired by @.mothelette
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boydonegood · 3 months
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oh my god they were roommates
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The early 2000s was really the era of making classic DC heroes into girldads.
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theofficialdailyplanet · 10 months
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schrijverr · 3 months
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Works Alone
When trying to pull the team together, Bruce’s ideas are dismissed, because he works alone. He goes home to his kids to pout about it.
On AO3.
Ships: none
Warnings: none
~~~~
Bruce isn’t pouting. He isn’t! He’s not even a little bit miffed, because he doesn’t want the Justice League to succeed anyway. He doesn’t trust them, hell, he’s not even a full time member, he’s only playing along to keep the others in check. So why would he care?
However, attempting to convince himself doesn’t mean it is working or not clear on his face. The second he steps into the Cave, Dick comments: “Someone is pouty. Did anything happen with your new friends, B?”
He sounds a little too jovial about the whole thing for Bruce’s taste, because despite what he’s telling himself, he is pouty.
“Ridiculous. Father would never stoop so low as to pout,” Damian sticks up for him.
Damian had been sparring with Dick when Bruce arrived, but is now taking a break to drink some water. Seeing the two of them work together makes Bruce both feel better and more prissy, so he just grunts.
“He’s totally pouty,” Jason crows, from where he’d been ruffling through Bruce’s equipment. He would gladly give Jason all the stuff he needs, but Jason insists on stealing it, even if he’s stealing it in plain sight, which is more closely to just taking it.
“Take it back,” Damian frowns.
“Nah,” Jason says. “You know how he gets when y’all don’t come by enough. I mean, you shoulda seen him when Dickface first moved out. Man’s a pouter, I dunno what to tell ya.”
“What’s B pouting about now?” Steph asks, falling into the conversation since she’s only just arrived to start getting ready for patrol tonight.
“We don’t know yet, he’s still denying he’s pouting,” Tim calls out, not having looked up from where he’s working on the Batcomputer all throughout. “Though it’s likely something with the League, since he just got back from giving back up.”
Heads turn his way and Dick concernedly frowns: “Are you okay? Did they do something?”
There is a dark, yet gleeful glimmer in Damian’s eyes as he asks: “Do we need to go out there and vanquish these super powered morons, father?”
“No,” Bruce sighs, still a little miffed, though his mood has definitely been improved by his kid’s banter, as well as their worry for him.
“Then what happened, old man?” Jason demands. “Stop that vague bullshit you always do.”
“Oehhh, Jason swore!” Steph immediately chimes in. “I’m telling Alfred.”
“Don’t you fuckin’ dare,” Jason whips around to her, pointing his knife at her.
“Knock it off, I wanna hear why B is being pouty,” Tim interrupts them.
“Yes, cease this chatter,” Damian adds, a rare show of agreement with Tim. They’ve all been growing, Bruce thinks proudly.
“So what happened then?” Steph asks, rolling her eyes, though stopping her fight with Jason.
Jason luckily also lets it go for now, so Bruce can answer: “They aren’t working as a team. It’s just a group of skilled individuals now and it’s becoming a problem.”
“You’ve been observing that for a while, B. Why suddenly the long face about it?” Dick asks.
And now the embarrassing part, Bruce thinks as he admits: “John is trying to do something about it now. I offered my help, but he refused, stating that I don’t know how, since I work alone, while he has been in the army.”
It’s quiet for a moment. Then, the whole group bursts out in laughter.
“What?” Jason wheezes, while Dick cackles: “He actually said that? Are you for real? Oh my god.”
“I’m going to loose my shit,” Steph snorts, Tim chuckling in the background.
Even Damian is looking amused, although also slightly judgmental. He disdainfully comments: “They are not very bright and must lack observational skills, father. Are you certain you wish to proceed in sponsoring them?”
“Yes,” Bruce sighs again. He’d already had that conversation with himself. Many times. “There is a lot of potential there too. Which is what makes them dangerous. However, out there is dangerous too. They can protect like an army can. Like we can’t.”
“Tt, we can take on extraterrestrial threats and some villains,” Damian huffs, obviously displeased. Out of all his siblings, he’s been the most vocally against the Justice League.
“The brat has a point,” Jason surprises him by backing him up. “I mean, between us here and those still on the streets or running late, you basically have your own little army right here. Just recruit Wonder Woman and I’m sure we’d have a chance.”
“You just wanna work with Wonder Woman, don’t you?” Dick says, sounding a little smug as he slides up behind Jason to make a kissy face at him.
Jason just pushes his face away as he blushes and exclaims: “Shaddup, Dickhead.”
“Yeah, shut up! That’s the most sensible thing he’s said all his life,” Steph hollers.
“Kids, kids, calm down. We’re not disbanding the Justice League and adopting Wonder Woman,” Bruce interrupts, wondering how his life ends up with him saying sentences that he never thought he would be saying.
“I never said nothin’ ‘bout adopting her,” Jason scowls.
“Cuz you want to kiss her!” Dick sing-songs.
“Isn’t she like a few thousand years old or something?” Tim asks.
“Also not marrying Wonder Woman. Any of you,” Bruce says. “Why don’t we all just stay away from Wonder Woman. And the rest of the Justice League, which will continue to exist and not fall apart because they struggle at teamwork. Maybe John’s idea will work. It’s too early to say.”
All of them are giving him a judgmental look now and Bruce struggles to not react to it. It’s always harder when he agrees with them.
“But Green Lantern’s plan is hinging on esprit de corpse,” Tim says. “And that will never work, because it’s a military mentality and while you’ve been working together, there is no real interdependence outside a few emergencies.”
“Yeah, what Timmy said,” Dick agrees, gesturing towards Tim.
“I loathe to admit it, father, but Drake has a point,” Damian nods and that truly shows that it is a hopeless mission for John.
“We’ll just have to see,” Bruce says, deciding to end the conversation there. “Now get ready for pre-patrol brief. We have a few open cases to assign. Cass and Harper will soon be reporting from their early rounds, so get suited up.”
There are a few groans around him, but his kids grant him the mercy of dropping it. They probably know as he does that this won’t be the last time they discuss it.
Indeed a few days later, Bruce comes walking into the Cave again, trying not to let the thunder cloud above his head show too much. However, he knows his kids notice, some sending him a raised brow or an inquiring look. Bruce is glad that he’s come far enough as a parent that not even Dick or Jason are put off by his bad mood.
Dick is also the one to tentatively ask: “Not a good training session with the Justice League?”
“John has us running drills,” Bruce grunts. “It’s showing us each other’s moves and how to play into each other, but…”
“It’s not turning you into a team?” Dick suggest.
“Yeah,” Bruce says, sighing.
“Esprit de corpse,” Tim sing-songs, walking by with a steaming mug of coffee that he went upstairs to refill, ready to start working on the case he’s in the middle of.
Bruce ignores Tim, knowing he’s right, and pulls the cowl off to card a hand through his hair. “We don’t need to run drills, but we need to do trust exercises, talk with each other, get to know each other better, be- be-”
He doesn’t know how he wants to end that sentence, but Cass does, materializing out of the darkness in her sweats, she says one word: “Family.”
“I thought you didn’t like the Justice League,” Duke asks. Luke is covering his day shift today since the last few days have been busy for Duke, but as a true Bat, he doesn’t really know what taking a break means, so he’s in the Cave training.
“Hn,” Bruce replies, thinking. “I mean, I do like them, I just-”
“He doesn’t trust ‘em,” Jason says. He wasn’t supposed to be at the Cave, but it’s clear why he’s there when Bruce looks his way in surprise. He’s holding a box of files, likely stuff he needs for his organization, Bruce wouldn’t know. They’re at a point where Jason doesn’t kill and Bruce doesn’t ask.
“What? Why?” Duke asks. “You fund them and go on missions with them. Even share intell and use them as backup, despite the fact that there are metas and aliens among them. Why do that if you don’t trust them?”
“’Cause he’s also paranoid,” Jason answers for him. “He’s monitoring ‘em.”
“But also befriending them,” Dick says, defending Bruce. “He just needs to vet them closely first, before he does that.”
“Right, ‘cause he’s paranoid,” Jason says.
Duke looks at Bruce, who sighs: “They’re not wrong. The Justice League has a lot of potential to do good and they’re showing they want to be that goodness. But they also have the potential of mass destruction. We need to be sure they won’t be a threat and that we have the right contingencies, before we let them in.”
“Like I said, paranoid,” Jason repeats.
“But trying,” Dick adds.
“And is stepping in to help them get better teamwork going to backfire?” Duke wonders. “Like are we scared we’re going to teach them how to destroy everything as a team? Is that it?”
“No,” Bruce answers, before the peanut gallery consisting of Dick and Jason can. “I offered help to John, he didn’t want it. I don’t think they’re willing to listen to my opinion on it, since I work alone, so have no expertise.”
Duke snorts loudly at that, then suddenly says: “Wait, you’re serious?”
Bruce grunts as conformation.
“Why?” Duke asks.
“Paranoid,” Jason says, rolling his eyes, before hoisting his box up again, before walking off.
Meanwhile, Bruce actually explains: “I haven’t mentioned you, like I said I would. It’s best if they don’t know we’re connected, nor that Gotham hosts more heroes. Connections like we have could be exploited by them and Superman can do a lot more damage should he so choose than Killer Croc or Bane.”
“But they’re good guys, right?”
“For now,” Dick answers morosely. “I’m not saying I agree with B’s paranoia, I mean, I was doing team ups before him and it worked out fine for me without the layers of paranoid he has. But a lot of things can go wrong, especially when working with people that powerful. I also maintained a semblance of mystique just to be safe.”
“But you can try to tell them this isn’t working, right? They must see that it’s not,” Duke says.
“From what I’ve seen both Hawkgirl and Wonder Woman are warriors like John, so they think the same about this. Superman and Flash are office workers, they’d think of horrid team-building days. While J’onn is used to working together with people who can read minds,” Bruce answers. “Out of all of them, only J’onn might listen.”
Cass nudges him and signs: ‘You are not saying something. There is hiding in your shoulders and a bit of guilt in your jaw.’
“What are you hiding, B,” Dick prods, a little bit of genuine judgment and worry coming through the tease.
“It’s a risk to tell them,” Bruce answers sulkily, knowing it’s a little silly, but unable to stop his brain from providing pop-ups of all the ways it could backfire.
“B,” Dick whines, throwing himself to hang over him. “You can at least try.”
“I will, I will,” Bruce says, placating yet also meaning it. He wants to do right by his kids and they want him to have friends, most of them encouraging him with the Justice League.
And, he does. Tentatively he suggest doing some trust exercises among the drills they’ve been running. As expected he gets weird looks and even a scoff from Wally and a frown from Clark. But he manages to play into John’s ideas brotherhood, which means the others are forced to give it a try.
It’s not perfect, of course it isn’t. They still have to deal with the fact that they never agreed on a strategists or a leader of sorts. They still have to build an organization, a system, a proper way of working as a unit.
However, they are getting somewhere. Some prodding here and there helps and the more it helps, the more others prod.
Though it’s not until years later, when Damian is nearly outgrowing the Robin mantle, that Bruce finally allows them to meet his kids. To let them in on the inner workings of Gotham vigilantism.
Then John will point at him and exclaim: “You son of a bitch, you lied to me! You let me struggle on my own to pull these idiots together.”
And at that point, Bruce will be comfortable enough to ignore everyone’s protests and smirk: “I offered you to help, didn’t I? Too bad I work alone.” Making his kids – though they’re adults at that point – laugh like the day they first heard.
~~
A/N:
I think the League thinking Batman works alone is hilarious, especially if they establish later than the batfam
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punkeropercyjackson · 3 months
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"Bruce adopts kids based off them having blue eyes!!!"He is literally jewish
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