I have been waking up at like 2/3am most days needing to eat something so I get up and have a glass of water and a little bit of cereal (cheerios without milk) then go back to bed
Today my dog got out of bed in solidarity and ate some of his kibble and then came back to bed and I'm just 🥺🥺 he's copying me and it's so sweet asfgddg
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it is all chaos and entropy. the thing is that the chaos and entropy make it beautiful and lovely.
yes, it's true that nature and the universe are uncaring and unspecific, and that is terrifying. i have lived through some of the unfairness - i got born like this, with my body caving into itself, with this ironic love of dance when i sometimes can't stand up for longer than 15 minutes. i am a poet with hands that are slowly shutting down - i can't hold a pen some days. recently i found a dead bird on our front porch. she had no visible injuries. she had just died, the way things die sometimes.
it is also true that nature and the universe are uncaring and unspecific, and that is wonderful. the sheer happenstance that makes rain turn into a rainbow. the impossible coincidence of finding your best friend. i have made so many mistakes and i have let myself down and i have harmed other people by accident. nature moves anyway. on the worst day of my life she delivers me an orange juice sunset, as if she is saying try again tomorrow.
how vast and unknowing the universe! how small we are! isn't that lovely. the universe has given us flowers and harp strings and the shape of clouds. how massive our lives are in comparison to a grasshopper. the world so bright, still undiscovered. even after 30 years of being on this earth, i learned about a new type of animal today: the dhole.
chance echoing in my life like a harmony between two people talking. do you think you and i, living in different worlds but connected through the internet - do you think we've ever seen the same butterfly? they migrate thousands of miles. it's possible, right?
how beautiful the ways we fill the vastness of space. i love that when large amounts of people are applauding in a room, they all start clapping at the same time. i love that the ocean reminds us of our mother's heartbeat. i love that out of all the colors, chlorophyll chose green. i love the coincidences. i love the places where science says i don't know, but it just happens.
"the universe doesn't care about you!" oh, i know. that's okay. i care about the universe. i will put my big stupid heart out into it and watch the universe feast on it. it is not painful. it is strange - the more love you pour into the unfeeling world, the more it feels the world loves you in return. i know it's confirmation bias. i think i'm okay if my proof of kindness is just my own body and my own spirit.
i buried the bird from our porch deep in the woods. that same day, an old friend reaches out to me and says i miss you. wherever you go, no matter how bad it gets - you try to do good.
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New article with more details (from Jason Schreier who first broke the story). If you can't see it, I'll copy the whole text under read more.
About 100 employees were laid off in total (8%) and one of the main reasons listed is "underperformance," "sharp drop in popularity" and "poor reception of Lightfall."
So you know when for the last year and a half content creators have been shitting and pissing on the game as a full-time job and the amount of negativity and ragebait content became the only thing to make content about for them? Well they certainly won't take the blame, but I will let it be known. These people either don't understand the influence they have or they do and they're doing it on purpose, and I don't know which of these two options is worse, but I am 100% confident that their campaign of rage and hate contributed to this.
You don't base your entire community around constantly hating everything about the only game you play (despite clearly not enjoying it anymore) and somehow avoid galvanising thousands and thousands of people into perceiving the game negatively. Imagine being employees who have barely worked there for 2 years and the only community reception they've seen is 24/7 hate train for their work and then they get fired because of "poor reception" and "drop in popularity." How can they not take that personally? I am absolutely devastated for these people who delievered a banger product and who were met with an unrelenting barrage of toxic gamer children which ended up having more sway over their boss than them.
Which brings me to the next bit and that's FUCK THE CEO. He is now my mortal enemy #1. I am projecting psychic blasts directly into his brain. What an absolute spineless coward who is more willing to bow down to fucking gamers than to protect his own employees. This is absolutely rage inducing because this has happened before. From the article from 2021 about the toxic culture at Bungie:
Reading this shit from the new article absolutely fucking sent me into blind rage because I immediately remembered this. Another instance of employees suffering because of comments on reddit. And because of toxic players. And proof that leadership is not protecting employees and is instead siding with players.
Match made in heaven. Asshole gamer content creators and asshole CEOs, all of whom sit at home on piles of money made from someone else's labour. I hope they all explode. None of the people that worked on this game deserve this.
Another article with an infuriating comment from the CEO:
In an internal town hall meeting addressing a Monday round of layoffs that impacted multiple departments, Bungie CEO Pete Parsons allegedly told remaining employees that the company had kept “the right people” to continue work on Destiny 2.
"Kept the right people." Really. Veteran composers weren't the right people? Die!
Bloomberg article in full:
Bungie’s decision to cut an estimated 100 jobs from its staff of about 1,200 followed dire management warnings earlier this month of a sharp drop in the popularity of its flagship video game Destiny 2.
Just two weeks ago, executives at the Sony-owned game developer told employees that revenue was running 45% below projections for the year, according to people who attended the meeting.
Chief Executive Officer Pete Parsons pinned the big miss on weak player retention for Destiny 2, which has faced a poor reception since the release of its latest expansion, Lightfall.
The next expansion, The Final Shape, was getting good — not great feedback — and management told those present that they planned to push back the release to June 2024 from February, according the people, who asked not to be identified because they weren’t authorized to speak publicly. The additional time would give developers a chance to improve the product.
In the meantime, Parsons told staff Bungie would be cutting costs, such as for travel, as well as implementing salary and hiring freezes, the people said. Everyone would have to work together to weather the storm, he said, leaving employees feeling determined to do whatever was needed to get revenue back up.
But on Monday morning the news got worse: Dozens of staffers woke up to mysterious 15-minute meetings that had been placed on their calendars, which they soon learned were part of a mass layoff. Bungie laid off around 8% of its employees, according to documentation reviewed by Bloomberg. Bungie didn’t respond to requests for comment.
Employees who were let go will receive at least three months of severance and three months of Bungie-paid COBRA health insurance, although other benefits, such as expense reimbursements, ended Monday, sending some staff racing to submit their receipts.
Laid-off staffers will also receive prorated bonuses, although those who were on a vesting schedule following Sony Group Corp.’s acquisition of Bungie in January 2022 will lose any shares that weren’t vested as of next month.
The layoffs are part of a larger money-saving initiative at Sony’s PlayStation unit, which has also cut employees at studios such as Naughty Dog, Media Molecule and its San Mateo office.
TD Cowen analyst Doug Creutz wrote in a report Monday that “events over the last few days lead us to believe that PlayStation is undergoing a restructuring.”
PlayStation president Jim Ryan announced last month that he plans to resign.
Many of the layoffs at Bungie affected the company’s support departments, such as community management and publishing. Remaining Bungie staff were informed that some of those areas will be outsourced moving forward.
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So we have part 2 of stylized Cookies, pretty much all from today other than bird girls
I feel like I did better yesterday, but also I haven’t seen yesterday’s drawing since yesterday, so I don’t really remember if it was
I was planning on drawing the Hollyberry family, but because I got stuck on Jungleberry (I deleted her so you can’t see), that didn’t end up happening. Funny enough, I was also like “I have no clue what to do for White Lily and Pure Vanilla so they’re probably not gonna be drawn for a while”, but what got me to draw more today was ideas for White Lily, and Pure Vanilla came along later
To be honest, White Lily and Pure Vanilla probably still need some tweaking before I color them. I’m still not really sure what I’m doing with White Lily’s hair, and for Pure Vanilla I feel like I haven’t done enough outside of the eyes and the hat. Maybe it’s because I gave him an oval head? I wasn’t really sure what head shape to give him other than it not being one I already used
Speaking of their eyes, White Lily’s are supposed to be pink with white irises, and Pure Vanilla is supposed to have no irises, but solid yellow and blue. Which when I was drawing looked somewhat unsettling, which is funny because since I draw so many Cookies, that’s usually normal now
Also also, I now want to make a purelily kid that combines their features, aka White Lily’s half shadow face and Pure Vanilla’s small non iris eyes. They’d look like the comedy mask. And probably also somewhat like Shadow Milk
As for the Hollyberry family, I think Holly herself looks good, and the other two look alright. Princess probably needs more tweaking. I wanted to give them a running trait of not just dot eyes, but leaves in their hair. I’m thinking that every Hollyberrian has leaves in their hair, since they’re berries. I am struggling with Royal Berry and Princess’, since the best place to it their leaves is where they have something else, aka their crown and heart pins
To be honest I want to make it so that Princess is half berry half candy, so that maybe she could not have to have the leaves, but I like Jungleberry and don’t want to get rid of her or turn her into a candy, so oh well
I drew Red Velvet because I was struggling with White Lily and Pure Vanilla. I gave him a triangle head because someone somewhere on my first page said something about Golden Cheese having a triangle face because the Cakes, so why not give the half cake Cookie a triangle head as well?
Also with Red Velvet I definitely took liberties in redesigning him, like with the hair and horns, but I don’t think he looks necessarily bad? As least not by the end
I also drew him with Dark Choco because darkvelvet is a thing I know. Though to be honest, while I draw it, I’m not sure how much I like it. Like in theory I like it, it’s not bad, it’s just that I don’t think I get it. Like as far as I can tell they can only be doomed by the narrative because Dark Choco leaves, but maybe I’m interpreting Red Velvet’s character wrong. It’s been over a year since I watched his story. And also I’m not sure what draws people to the ship? Like darklico for example I can get for various reasons, but I don’t know about darkvelvet
Oh yeah, Licorice is here too. Forgot about that. Well I tried to make his head oval shaped because it’s sort supposed to look like a skull? Or a cartoony skull. Same with his eyes and mouth, they’re supposed to be somewhat skull-y. I didn’t draw his actual skulls though because I’m lazy and it’s a small drawing. I think he turned out pretty good though
I think maybe next page I should focus on more random characters outside of the Ancients. Maybe that’ll help the creative freedom
Anyways yeah, I think that’s it for now
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