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#Death from the Marsh
reddieswift · 2 months
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besties :,)
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marshmcore · 2 months
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Imagine, if you will, you’re burning to death, but these two gentlemen saved you
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Ah yes, them, together
Postal dude is the “crazed gunman” Sniper tells his dad not to worry
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totaled-drama · 9 months
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Flying Fish and Leap Frogs jersey designs!! Featuring their team captains :)
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teawizardry · 4 months
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quick marsh picture, because i am so Normal(tm) about him
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bloogers-boogers · 1 year
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So I've been getting into the sp fandom lately and let me tell u it's a must for me to do a one-shot.. It's gonna be a good attempt
One-shot SP
/CURSE/
(Kinda shipping? (Kyle/Cartman) Kinda trying to replicate the imagination land scene where Kyle dies an other various scenes, Cartman(important for the plot),Cartman and Kenny lore,some Stan against, and death of a main character. Kenny plays a role, also y'know death and resurrection that's he's thing.. right?)
It a pretty damn long One-shot.
It's been a common day in the little mountain town of Colorado called south park, Randy had arranged a parade/party at one of the most popular places in town 'DikinBaus' because of some festive weed special (trying to make it seem out of the ordinary weed when it comes to the same shit with a diffrent label) that Stan Marsh and his three other friends would care less about, well, atleast one. Eric Cartman.
Yes, the little evil master mind of south park.
Bitch was angry and quite bitter about the fact that his old home was no longer his, after being part of creating it's popularity. Though he did deserve it and his jewish friend made it know.
"I don't know why you're so pissed off, Cartman, you we're asking for it when you took advantage of Butters hard work," The latter roll his eyes.
"Whatever, it's Butters," He stated, as if it were obvious.
"Dude, just be grateful you got your old house back," Stan tune in, his tone was a little bit frustrated then it should've, luckily his fat friend payed not much attention to it. He wished he could move back, be close to his friends, have his old life back. But his father was farther than an idiot to just let go of his marijuana dream.
"How am I gonna be grateful about losing my DikinBaus!?," He exclaimed angry. Kenny, their blonde friend snorted, "shut up Kinny!."
"C'mon man, it's not a big deal," He patted the bigger boy's shoulder in hopes he'll just moved on from the subject. But ofcourse, he didn't.
"No! I can't leave it like this with out a fight!, I work hard for that shitty place to reopen, it's not fair!," He clenched he's fist, glaring at the nothing.
Both three boys just looked at each other, in a mutual agreement of not getting involved.
Later that day, Stan was forced to partake in the event host by his father, ofcourse not before arguing and complaining about it being just another waste of the income they made, for then later on his father to complain about how they had no money for more resources. Repeat all the time. Stan just hold the bridge of his nose outta frustration.
No boy his age should be this stress out for his parents doings, in this scenario, his dad.
"Hey Stan, check this out!," Exclaimed excited, Randy. The boy followed him, as he has no other choice but to listen.
"What the fuck is that," Stan questioned a little horrified, confused? He couldn't tell, cause he actually gave two shits. But this looked outta the ordinary of the ordinary. If that even makes sense.
There was a seagull looking mutation with what it seems like a rats feet. For a second there he was worried his father accidentally caught man bear pig's kid.
"It's the Tergrity farms mascot!," He exclaimed even more excited taking out a board outta nowhere, explaining his new strategy.
Oh. So that's that.
"Yeah, bye," said lastly, in a flat tone, no longer caring about the rest before returning outside.
Stan was not gonna get involved, no matter how bizarre and crazy his dad's Karen episodes get, he told himself for the millionth time that same day. He was NOT getting involved.
[...]
"For fuck sake dad! What did you do!?," He shouted confused by the change of event, being tied in a chair was far from the plans he had for this evening.
"Uh.. well, let's say it a TEGRITY strategy," Randy smiled commercially, clearly seems nervous. Clearly fucked up. The latter frowned from that response.
Stan sighed, "okay. What did you do," he asked again, finally had calm himself and processed the situation he's in. No pizza night at Tolkien's tonight he said to himself.
"Well, remember my mascot?,"
He nodded, ofcourse he did, it all happened today.
"Well turns out he's like, related to chutulu."
Stan wanted to grip his nose outta frustration again, so bad, after hearing that, "what?," he asked again. As he couldn't believe that thing was related to.. unfuckin' believable. Actually it was definitely believable.
"Yeah, I don't know how'd it happened but he found out and wanted to massacre me and my farm, can you believe that! I even offered some of my weed," said exhausted while having a pout face as a child being scolded.
"Okay, so how the hell did we end up being tied up?."
"Stan, there's a bunch of cult members in south park," he stated obviously while he rolled his eyes by being questioned this much. But he still bother to answer, "those motherfuckers knew chutulu wanted us so they found us, knocked us and tied us up, as their way of worship. We're pretty much a sacrifice."
"But why me!?," he stated bitterly as he was NOT trying to get involved today.
"Because you are, Stan! I told you about my strategy did I!?."
"I left!?."
They bicker a bit more before Stan decided to speak out for a solution.
"Look, I think, I have a plan. You know Cartman?."
"Your fat friend? What about him?."
"Well, he manipulated chutulu to join he's superheroe team awhile ago. Thing is, if we get Cartman, maybe he can help us."
"Isn't he like, a dick?."
"It's complicated. Let's just find a way outta of these ropes."
"Easy." Randy picked out of his pocket shirt with his mouth some weed and light it up with his feet and a lighter he had in his pants. And burned the ropes. He then untied him.
"You could've done that all this time!?," exclaimed baffled by his father's stupidity once again.
"No time Stan!," he said while he ran into the depths of the woods with the boy following behind.
Yes, they were in the woods. Let's move on.
[...]
Kenny found himself running like a mad man, he did not mean to provoke the dark lord, but he did. He just wanted answers about his curse! Was that too much to ask?
But here he was, regretting kicking one of those big claws of him after being bluntly ignored by chutulu, it seems it was looking for something. He assumed it was Cartman as he couldn't link the others with it. That fat fuck. What did he do!?
He couldn't bare die today as he was not aware how far chutulu would detroy the town by tomorrow. He needs to know why it's here, and ofcourse, his curse! Cause it seemed no one cares besides himself! Fuck!
He dodge one of chutulu lasers that ended destroying a car near by.
He hid in one of the markets from town, as if that's gonna make a difference. Then he saw him. That fat fucker! He was with Kyle and Butters in the meat section. Both seemed to be arguing about something while the blonde hold a riffle nervously watching the two, he'd care less right now about whatever those two were arguing about.
"You son of a bitch!," He slammed cartman into one of the freezer, Cartman looked at him with opened feared eyes, "what did you do!?."
"K-kinny..!?."
"Woah, dude, calm down," said, Kyle, "what's going on?."
" 'What's going on?'," he responded incredulous, "chutulu's out there destroying the town and killing countless souls! That's what going on!."
"Oh," Butters said not being so stoked about it.
"Yeah, we kinda know that, asshole," the brunette said casually loosing his grip.
"Eric thinks that chutulu may be here because of a mission," Butters explained.
"Oh really," the blonde said sarcastically eyeing him, "Cartman why the fuck did you summon chutulu here!? Do you know all the damage you've done."
"Excuse me? I didn't do shit, kinny!," Cartman exclaimed offended, by being accused so surely.
Yeah, he has committed various, and I mean, VARIOUS crimes, but he did NOT do this. Though he must admit to himself that this turn of events could be convenient for him to destroy DikinBaus. As no one in this stupid town does not deserve such a wonderful magnificent place. That HE made. And as such rightly deserves it and rightly could destroy it if he wanted to, right?
"Like I'm gonna believe whatever shit comes from your mouth, fatso," Kenny stated.
"It's true." Kyle spoke up, "what Cartman said.. look, I've been following this asshole since he said he was gonna try to do something about that dumb hotdog place, so, I followed him around-"
"Like and stalker," bluntly added Cartman.
"And-" Kyle continued, ignoring cartman's comment before frowning, "the only thing he's done is shit on Butter's porch and purchasing 200 hotdogs in hopes DikinBaus will run out and shut down. Which is the most ridiculous thing I've ever witnessed–"
"Oh c'mon, Kyel it was brilliant!," Cartman defended his stupidity, "it's easy an effective! I buy all the hotdogs, open my own stand and start a business," finalizing while crossing his arms. Kyle look at him angrily.
Nobody will question where he got the money to pay for all those hotdogs. Most likely in a fraudulent way. Whatever it doesn't matter.
"You ate all the hot dogs, fatass!!."
Cartman frown finding a better comeback, "well..! Atleast I have hot dogs!."
"What?," Kyle responded simply with one eyebrow upward.
"Tsch, whatever. I have a new better plan that I won't be sharing to either of you assholes."
Kenny, snapped. He had enough of this bullshit.
"Guys! Chutulu!?."
"Oh yeah, yeah," Cartman had his arms up. A freaked Kenny is a scary Kenny, "uh, what about him?," he added.
"Really?," he asked again incredulously, not waiting for an answer he continued, "something or someone must have summon the dark lord. We need to find a solution to get him out."
"Dude, that's chutulu. Even if we wanted to do something what can we do about it?," Kyle added skeptical.
"Yeah, it's not like this shitty town deserves to be saved anyways," Butters stated, still a little bitter about having to spend community service cleaning the mess the towns people made just cause he was seen as a sex offender for pinching a girl who he thought had no green on San Patrick's day!
"Well. Cartman?," Kenny asked staring deeply into Cartman's eyes. For some odd reason he felt a connection with the boy. As if his eyes had a glint of something.. he just couldn't recall what it was.
"How would I know?," Cartman asked confused, and kinda annoyed that he hasn't even started his plan B because of an overdramatic Kenny.
"You manipulated chutulu you fat fuck! Do it again," He exclaimed frustrated of the whole thing now looking at the other boys. He's finding all of these unnecessary scenarios being unfold overwhelming. Nobody seems to care, nobody seems to care about chutulu destroying south park, maybe he doesn't care!?
He sigh. Maybe he really doesn't. Maybe all this is an excuse to find out about his curse shield with the idea of being heroic. Screw that. He cared! This town may be fucked up but it was his home! Our home! They must care!
"Okay, I got a plan," Kenny stated finally after a brief silence.
[...]
Cartman found himself frowning angrily standing in the middle of the street, in a kitty costume. He would've rather just picked his coon costume but Kenny stated it'd be more effective and he was definitely trying to mess with him once again, cause he found it hilarious.
Stupid kinny.
The other three boys were hiding behind a dunked car near by him. Not like it'd make a difference. Always put Cartman in the more risky messy situations! Ofcourse he was convinced with a reward if things goes well, not because he's scared of Kenny and he was being a pussy! It was the reward he was promised of!
He heard Kenny snicker a bit, stupid kinny. He finds this amusing didn't he!? Asshole.
He then was faced with the giant dark lord with each step the ground rumble and the buildings breaking and weakening by him.
He gulped. He's done this before, he can do it again. Why is he nervous this time?
Both pair of eyes met. Time for action.
"Miaw Miaw! If it isn't one of my best pals! Miaw miaw!," he then climbed in one of chutulu's feet to his head. My gawd he deserves a reward for this acting. He then pursued on scratching the lord's head as he enjoyed the sensation of the fake claws on his skull, "who's my precious chutulu?," he then added a purr distracting the giant.
The three boys started preparing the trap they had made while upon seeing cartman's manipulation was once again, working. That fucking fatass.
Kyle was trying to knot the rope to one of the polls light but end up falling backwards in the sight of chutulu, who immediately put it's attention on the redhead. Great, just fucking wonderful.
Chutulu immediately turned his attention to Kyle and growled once knowing damn well this was set up.
"Dammit jew!," Cartman shouted making it more obvious that this in fact was, indeed a setup.
'Twack!'
Chutulu looked behind him as he had felt a tiny rock hit his tail.
"Stan?," Kyle said confused. Once Stan and his dad we're visible with some hunting gear on and some guns in there hands.
This was not going as plan. And once again Kenny sigh frustrated. He wasn't sure if the new pair of characters were a good thing or not. He's gonna let it slide this time.
Randy slowly approached chutulu leaving behind Stan, who just cautiously watched.
He then took out a weird mutant goose rat thing from behind his right arm.
Chutulu raised a brow. If that's even possible, but it was. Ofcourse it was.
Chutulu looked down as the mutant thingy went to his side rubbing himself against it's feet. It was heartwarming if it weren't for the situation they were put for and who it was. Then Chutulu did the imaginable, he squashed it.
Stan and Randy looked stoked.
"Well that does it," said Randy.
Both Marshes mouth agape, still looking at chutulu and now dead corpse.
And in splits seconds Kenny put himself in front of the two, standing in front of chutulu embracing his blonde hair exposing his face, he had taken his parka off. Glaring at the monster above. He have had enough.
"What am I?," he asked once more, "answer me now!."
"What's with this one?," Randy side eyed Stan, as he shrugged in response. Confused also.
Chutulu ignored him and approached Randy. Which jolted a bit nervous as he did not figure out what he did to anger the creature. If it wasn't his mascot than what?
He lowered his face to the man and quickly head bunked him to the side, hitting his body through a store window breaking into pieces.
"Dad!!," Exclaimed Stan, rushing in hurry to his father's aid. Noneless a idiot but still his idiot.
"Ow! I'm okay Stan.." the injured man reassured.
In a blink of an eyes the military had showed up and started attacking chutulu, bullets in and out angering the creature, he had put himself on it's feet again trying to block the bullets and attacking the attakers, Cartman still on the dark lord's head completely taken off guard as he was distracted with the dialog was then shot in the back 'ow!' falling off chutulu's head straight to the ground. He had broked his limbs and neck during impact. This anger chutulu even more, as for him kitty Cartman was like a pet.
Kyle and his other two friends had witnessed it. As he shouted, "¡Cartman!," he ran towards him caring less of the chaos around him.
"Fuck, he killed Cartman!," Kenny exclaimed as he approached the now what appears dead boy.
'There's no way'.
"Holy fuck!," said Stan from a far, he was still on his father's side but had witnessed it aswell.
Kyle was next to him analyzing the boy's wounds as he couldn't believe it.
"He's dead.." says Butters while having his mouth slightly agape standing next to Kenny watching the now corpse.
"You bastard.." whispered Kenny, he was staring at his so called best friend, lifeless eyes. It was definitely an odd sight.
"He can't be dead.." Kyle reassured griping into the boy's costume, "he just can't," he frowned.
Stan had already approached the scene as his father seem to had been well standing up not as injured.. or in this scenario dead.
He was also as stoked as the two other boys that were just standing there watching there fat friend laying there. Kyle was the only one on the ground gripping on to Cartman as if he didn't want to let go.
Kyle stared at him for a bit longer than he expected, his body had lost color, his half lidded lifeless eyes staring at him and his hands were cold.. this can't be happening. Cartman can't die. That's not possible!
Kyle with both his fist hit his friend's chest as hard as possible, anger. So much anger!
"Cartman! Can't! Die!," hitting him more times with no intention, it just felt right.
"Woah, dude," Stan put a hand on his best friend's shoulder trying to calm him down he's never seen his friend act this way. And to be honest he never expected to see Cartman this way either. Lifeless.
Kyle smacked Stan's hand off him still in disbelief.
"¡Cartman! Cartman!," he shouted almost in a cry, desperation in his voice," you fat fuck! Wake up!," he again hit as many times as he could, in the dead one's chest.
"Dude, Kyle.. he's gone," Stan said in the most pity voice. As if he could feel what Kyle felt.
"No he's bullshittin' he's fucking bullshitting, Stan!," He said almost as he's trying to believe it himself, he felt himself shake, his eyes felt watery.
A big thump caught their attention leaving the other boy kneeled to the other not leaving his side. He could now care less about that fucking dark lord and this stupid chaotic town!
"You fat fuck...!" he whispered more to himself as he closed his eyes and clenched his fist.
He may hate Cartman, and may have countless times told him that's he's better off being dead. But he really didn't mean it. If Randy can be alive, if Garrison can be alive, if man bear pig can be alive.. then why can't him? It's only fair. Two of those people he mentioned are assholes in there own fucked up way, but have done countless crimes and gotten away of being a dick atleast man bear pig is a wild satanic creature it makes sense if he kills thousands of lives. But those two other bastards are here! Free, alive.. So can Cartman!
"Cartman..?," he said choked as he felt steaming tears fall down his cheeks as he watched his fat friend laying down breathless, no bicker response. No insults. Nothing but flat silence from his part. His death even seems painful, not the typical peaceful dead look, just plain painful.
[...]
As the day ended things went back to normal as per usual, well almost.
Kenny never thought he'd find himself sitting in a funeral of one of his best friends. It was always the way around. For some reason it felt wrong. That he was supposed to be in that box and not his friend.
His mother crying on the side of the casket while some of the south park parents tried to comfort her, but failed. As she was never that close to them anyways. Besides, deep inside she knew no one would fully understand what she feels as she knows her son wasn't the best of person's. And that probably there were people from this town who'd want this or asked for this. But she? She saw the evil in him and had gotten tired of his stupid schemes but that was still her little boy and she will always be his mother. And that won't ever change, so the pain will always remain there. And everyone else was an hypocrite in her eyes.
The four boys remain silent, listening to the ceremony behold them. Yes four boys, as for now that Cartman would no longer partake in their group they added Butters in his place.
"So, do I like have to act like an asshole now?," Butters asked grabbing their attention.
"Uh no?," Stan answered.
"Well if I'm gonna take Eric's place I think I should like try to act like him, like when you guys once choose Clyde because he was the second fat boy of our class..?"
"No Butters, you don't have to act like Cartman," Stan stated now a little annoyed, this wasn't the place or time to discuss something like this when their friend hasn't still been buried. It kinda stings.. this feels fresh. It is fresh. Who knew this fat fuck would affect him?
"Are you sure?."
"For fuck sake Butters, shut up!," Kyle exclaimed angrily, receiving a couple of odd stares from some of the other people there. He cared less to be honest. He clenched his fist as he wanted so bad to punch his face and beat him up. As he'd normally just do with Cartman. Cartman..
Cartman, Cartman, Cartman..
He looked down to his feet avoiding his friends gaze.
[...]
Two days have pass, and honestly this Butters thing just wasn't working. Stan wondered if he truly would prefer having Cartman back than having to witness a whimp like Butters attempt to be a douchebag loser. Don't get him wrong, Butters can be a douchbag but he can't get into Cartman's level. Even if he tries to be. Maybe that's what Butters doing wrong? He's attempting to be someone he's not when he can easily be himself as a douche. But still, not Cartman.
For much of Stan's surprise, south park still hasn't changed a bit after his friend's passing. It's still chaotic, and bizarre. And as hard to admit it even feels longer and even torturous. New characters appear here and there, some were dicks, others were plain awful, some just bland boring ass people. He couldn't believe it, he's actually starting to miss him, as these other characters just feel forced to continue continuity when it's just full filling!
It's just two days. Two fucking days. He's been longer than that with out seeing his fat friend and he's okay with it, even thankful, and yet knowing he won't ever be seeing him because he's dead just changes things.
Let's not even talk about Kyle. Out of the the three. Yes, he's not counting Butters. Fuck Butters!
Kyle has been the most affected. Ofcourse he also has to witness the cringey attempts of their idiotic blonde friend, trying to become his new "arch-rival" as that comes in the packaging of being Eric Cartman. Including being a selfish, manipulative piece of shit. Anyways, point is, to be Eric Cartman you must also hate Kyle Brofloski. And Butters just doesn't have it in him to fully hate on someone or just give him the time of day Cartman would normally do daily, actually obsessively to Kyle.
So here he was, on one of the seats of the school buss behind Kenny and Butters, hearing Butters trying to bicker Kyle. It really feels surreal.
"So, Kayl."
"It's 'Kahl', if you're trying to mimic Cartman atleast do it right," he responded back with an added eye roll at the end.
"Well, geezz.. I mean Ay! Shut up you dumb jew! I'll do and say what I want, whenever I want!."
Well, now that's actually better. Stan actually had to repressed a laugh cause he actually found that funny.
"Wow, Butts you're getting better," complimented Kenny.
Butters beamed and stared at Kyle, who silently watch another kid entering the bus. He really did not bothered putting his attention on the blonde.
"C'mon Kyle, you must admit that was pretty good," He tune in, trying to get Kyle to loosen up.
"Yeah.. I suppose," Kyle then looked up at Butters while the other just looked back nervously. Kyle sigh, "can you fight?" he then added with a glint of mischief while the other two boys stared at Kyle, confused for the sudden change in demeanor. Butters looked a little uncertain on what to answer.
As he should, this is Kyle we're talking about.
"O-ofcourse I do!," In fact, Butters does know how to fight, just not Kyle, never Kyle.
"Great, meet me up after school in the playground," said finalized while standing up to get off the bus.
"Ah geez.." Stan heard Butters whispered before getting off the bus to join his friend.
He didn't know what Kyle had planned, but he sure wants to find out.
[...]
"Oh geez! I don't think I can be Cartman no more!," exclaimed Butters with a couple of bruises in his face, tired, "Kyle was beating me up like a butcher to its meat selection!."
"Well that is Cartman's job to deal with y'know," Stan added. He figured this must be a way for Kyle to get rid of Butters. So he followed along.
"Yeah dude, if you're gonna be Cartman. You must know that you have to become Kyle's personal punching bag," Kenny tune in, actually enjoying the laugh. He knew we were all messing with him. Cause in fact, it seems Stan was not the only one bothered by Scotch.
"Oh Jesus!."
"Man, actually I do believe you can become Cartman, even better. As you seem to be more capable of taking Kyle's moods," yeah, we can be assholes sometimes. Stan smiled a bit.
"Oh boy.." he was not liking what he was hearing. Before adding anything further Kyle approached the group, tuning in with a happy humming.
"Hey there guys," he then glared at Butters, "Butters."
"AHHHHHH!!!," He scream while dashing out of there before adding, "Screw you guys I'm going home!."
"Well, that does it," Kyle shrugged.
"Guess no one can deal with you more than a day," Kenny added.
"I guess so."
"So now what?," Stan questioned. Everything just went silent.
Normally Cartman would suggest some stupid shit, we'd shit on first before following through with it. But even the substitute bailed on us, so we must figure it out on our own.
"Board games..?," Ken then added.
"Nah, done that yesterday," Kyle replied, tapping his foot on the ground, kinda impatient, kinda bored.
"What about basketball," Stan suggested. Once again the three boys remain silent. The wind whistling in their ears as they thought harder and the space between them felt thicker as they become smaller. And smaller, and smaller..
"Who wants to try summoning Cartman with a ouija?," Kenny added plainly, while pursuing on leaving the area to his place, with the certainly the others would followed.
In fact, not only did they follow, they were eager for it.
[...]
-In Hell-
"Dammit! no barbecue at sight in the most hottest place between three worlds!," Cartman exclaimed baffled.
He's been a hell citizen for two days now, and it has sucked. He isn't even allowed to go in the cool clubs cause he was a minor and would be forever be one for eternity! He did enjoy the public torture that was embrace there but besides that, nothing too outta the ordinary he could see up in south park.
He sigh, not knowing what to do, with out his friends to annoy, death feels empty. Boring as fuck! He wants to get outta here!
When he approached a counter were there were two men talking about some country song while drinking martinis, he decided to sit next to them. They immediately stayed quiet as his presence disturb them. 'Dumb bitches' he thought.
"So... how can we get out?," he asked.
"Excuse me?,"
"Yeah, like how do we get out from hell."
"Oh, why the hell do you want to get out?."
"Because it's boring as fuck, i want to live!."
"Well, he is young, George," one of the men side eyed his companion. The other nodded in agreement.
"Well there's no way, young boy," one of the men answered, I'll call him number two. Pftt, number two, get it? Hahaha! He repressed a laugh and continued trying to get more information outta the two grown men.
"Okay, but like there must be atleast someone who COULD know a way outta here, right?," he digged.
"Hmm.." number one begin thinking, pftt.. number one, "actually I believe there is."
Getting the boy's attention, he leaned forward as if it'd help him hear them any better. They were both drunk as fuck. For what it appears. Their talk was all gibberish, but 'anything to get out of here' he said to himself.
"You should look for the 'dark red soul'."
"The 'dark red soul'..?," he murmured.
"Yup, he lives in the coast side, just follow the direction signs and go to the yellow hotel. And just ask for him, someone must know where exactly he lives at, he's quite a party goat," number two explained chugging the bit of martini he had left.
So that, he did, he followed the directions signs that lead him to hotel 'jak n off' it was yellow, that's all he cared about. This asshole better know how to get out or he'll make sure he'll make himself a new bowl of chili.
[...]
"Oh, looking for red man?."
"Sure? Is that dark red soul?," he asked not very sure if it's the same guy he was told of.
"Yeah, that's his party animal name. Follow me."
'Tch, lame.' But he did follow. This tall freckle man took him to a long dark alleyway, he was feeling skeptical at first but then remembered he couldn't die if he was already dead. It's like respawn. Sigh. He remembered when he first came here, he fell in some spikes down a lava-fall (waterfall) he also remembered how painful it was but how quick he repawn back. So all is new.
The man enter a dark room and turn on the lights.
"Yeesh!!," some rookie exclaimed angrily as he was caught in a very peculiar position with a lady friend. Both naked.
"The fuck man!?," the red head turned his gaze down looking at the chubby boy.
His eyes widen as the latter.
"Dad..?" his mouth slightly agape. He couldn't fucking believe it. Out of all things. Out of all people. It was him.
Back then he would've dreamt of finding his dad, feeling complete and happy. But once he knew about what the town hid from him what HE hid from him, he just became bitter with the idea of ever having a father figure in the picture. He figured it would've weakened him and it was for the best to had never encountered or meet him. Cause he hates feeling weak. Cause he isn't.
They both looked at each other for a long brief silent second.
The other two people that were in the room left them, well more like the other dude stole his companion.
"Uh.. 'dark red soul'..?" he added, uncertain what to say. The boy felt his legs wobble and his lip twitch. While the older man had his left eye twitch instead.
"Yeah.." Jack answered quietly.
They were both put in a very awkward situation.
"..Eric huh?.." He then added when he received no answer. He wasn't use to having someone who didn't listen to him. Noneless a son who doesn't. Scott was always so eager to answer him even with the most smallest things. Man, he really missed his boy.
"You know my name?," the boy answered too quickly than he expected. He cough nervously, "ofcourse you do, I'm Eric Cartman," he boost his ego. More like a cover up of his insecurities at the moment.
Jack lighten up a bit at the comment. Indeed he knew about the trouble maker he was, well the trouble in general, everyone in south park knew. The son of a single crackhead whore mother, a whore he slept with.
"I see you're quite a confident one," he said cheeky before nudging the boy.
Cartman jolted by that action. Skepticism was basically like his middle name. That type of gesture is uncalled for and unnecessarily. And it made him feel uneasy for some reason.
"Yeah..right," he decided to ignore the remark, "okay so.. I heard you know how to get me back to south park?."
"Oh, so that's why you're here?," then he realized that the only reason the boy is presented here was because of the inevitable, he died in the upper world.
Maybe it's his instincts, or just maybe because he's been so lonely. He feels this sudden sickening attachment towards the boy. As messed up as it sounds, considering he did ground him into chilly. But in his defense he didn't know. He didn't know he was his father. Would've that made a difference? That he couldn't know. But that made him soften just a bit. That would keep him fooled just for now.
"Yeah, I want to get back home," Cartman stated, as the tense moment had started to drift off coming to a lighter ambient.
"Oh, well I suppose I could help you with that," he lied. He saw Eric's eyes sparkle a bit, as in hope. It remind them so much like Scott's..
"Sweet!," he exclaimed excited. Finally, this literally hell will be over soon.
[...]
"So you're saying you own that hotel?," Cartman asked. As his father explained most of his living down in hell and his ropes in it.
They headed to a taco stand and Jack gesture him to take a seat in one of the chairs while he order.
"Pretty much. Cool huh?," he responded a little proud of his accomplishments.
"Yeah.. so.. 'jak n off'?," Cartman asked while he saw the waiter place their beverages in the counter.
"Haha yeah.. I thought it'd be funny. No one seems to care," he added with a chuckle, taking a sip of his soda.
"Ha.. I- when I was in the upper world me and my friend kinny started a business reopening a old hot dog restaurant and we named it 'DikinBaus' haha.. just to mess around with people," he admitted, strangely still feeling uneasy and nauseous.
"Ha! 'DiknBaus'? I love it!," Jack laughed a bit whipping a fake tear out of his right eye, "I guess we share a certain humor, Eric."
"Yeah.." he look down at his hands. It felt odd talking to his dad. He wasn't sure if it was good but he knew it wasn't unpleasant.
"So you also have a business?," Jack asked interested. His boy does resemble him in ways he won't deny that, though his slut of a mother's features were surely there, all over his face to be in fact.
Scott never seem interest in taking big steps on trying to climb to the top leagues or have big ideal dreams. He seemed okay with living in the low peaceful life and well, following his favorite bands gushing over there new songs as a fellow follower than a leader.
"Well. Turns out they took it away from me when it became one of the most popular places in town! Can you believe that?," he complained, finally letting loose the awkward tension he felt, to vent his anger and displeasure, "and what's worse is that my mom followed through with it and didn't care that we had a lifetime successful business with a cool looking house!."
"That sounds awful, your mom's a bitch," Jack admitted. He can already tell Eric can have a bright future as a business man if he we're to try harder.
The boy jolted. It anger him when anyone talks bad about his mom, maybe Jack can be an exception being his dad and all?.. but it still pinch his heart and left a sour feeling in the tip of his tongue. Yes, his mom's a bitch, but only he can say it. He really doesn't know how to respond to his dad about it.
"Right.." he then continued sipping his soda, "so, how did you manage to create one of the most popular hotels in hell?," ignoring further his mother's mentioned.
"Well, when I was down here I was very popular among the other people that had also previously died. I stood out in a way."
The food had already been served. And Cartman picked one of the bean tacos and starting munching it, he felt his father's stare on him and he felt conscious of how he was eating 'Do I have something?'.
"Really? What made you so different?," oblivious to the other stares he was getting from the other customers.
"My death," He bluntly admitted, making Cartman almost choke on his food. 'Fuck'
"Oh," he flatly stated.
"Yeah, it was a hit back then. Everyone was talking about it, and people glorified me for it. As they say it was one the most radical deaths they've had ever heard happening," Jack explained, smiling by the memory, he found himself oddly proud of it. As it had benefited him in so much, and honestly he liked the attention on him, "As to expected I was very popular and was given many opportunities, like talk shows and lots and lots of 'money'," said emphasizing the last word.
Cartman stared at him for brief seconds, "money?," hint of greed in his words. Jack smiled by that, and nodded. He sure was his son.
"So.. how did you die?," he finally asked that anxious question he's been wanting to know.
"So like, I was kinda forced to help my annoying friends out to bring back chutulu to the underground, even though I didn't want to and wanted to just use chutulu to destroy 'DikinBaus' as because no one deserves such a wonderful place I made, and I was shot by the military by accident while I was on top of chutulu's head, falling straight to the ground," Cartman answered casually, squeezing some ketchup on his plate mimicking the blood he imagine leaving, sparing the costume details and the manipulation tactic he use too.
"Wow, I guess us Tenenorman just have it in us on dying radically and cool," Jack laughed excited with a fist in the air.
The name used took Cartman off guard. He was a Cartman after all! But it really warmed his heart to be complimented that much and it felt nice, being included for once. So he let it slide just this once.
"Yeah, I guess it is!," He exclaimed more confident and puffed his chest out, proud.
Jack gave him a warm smile and Cartman returned it back.
[...]
Jack had went on asking for some books he claimed as 'solutions' for Cartman's problem, while the boy decided to sit back and rethink his choices of the chilly incident and how different it would've been if they had just told him the truth.
Then, he felt a odd buzzing sound inside of his ear. He started smaking his left side with his palm.
"Cartman!," he.. 'was that Stan?', "Dude can you hear us? Are you there?."
'Holy shit, it is the hippie!'
"Stan?."
"Fatass?," another familiar voice chimed in.
"Aye! I Ain't fat you stupid jew!."
"Holy shit, Cartman dude!," Stan exclaimed a little too excited then he wanted to be. Cartman flinched by the intense noise in his ears, it was bothering him.
"Ow! Aye you damn hippie! Lower your voice will yah! My head hurts just hearing you guys!."
On the other side Kyle couldn't hold a smile. The other boys just laughed by being able to still annoy Cartman even being in a whole different life.
"So how's it going over there, Eric," Kenny asked.
"Yeah, you haven't lost ten thousand pounds over there by not eating junk food all day?," Kyle added, knowing well Cartman would answer back by the remark he leaned forward to the magic ball that was centered in the middle of the ouija.
"In the matter of fact, you dumb jew, I'm eating pretty well," The boy answered with puffed cheek and airs of superiority, "But things are going pretty well, it's boring as fuck though I was trying to find a way outta here," he then added. Not even questioning how they even managed to connect with him.
"And how's that going, Cartman?," Stan asked curiously. He really wanted to know if there was way.
Cartman took a few seconds to rehear his friend's question. He considered it a bit. After all, he was starting to find hell quite less boring now that he found his dad. He was not going to admit that to them though.
"Uh- well, I'm still on it. Not much luck though," he lied.
"Dammit Cartman, you fat fuck you really can't do shit with out us can you," Kyle then added, smirking slightly.
"Aye!."
The three boys started howling of laughter.
"Eric?."
Eric jolted in shock by the sudden voice behind him, reappearing to his vision. He reposition himself.
"Everything alright?," Jack answered a little concerned of his son behavior just now. He had just returned with some books at his hold while he witnessed Eric seemingly talking to himself.
It was nothing new to him that his son was mentally fucked up, so he has decided to shrug it off.
"Yeah, everything's alright."
'Who's that, fat boy?,' Stan asked.
"No one.." Cartman answered in a whisper.
"C'mon, Eric. Let's go to my place and discuss about your situation," Jack added with a nod gesturing to follow him.
Eric then pursued on following behind him.
[...]
"I guess we lost connection with Cartman," Kenny stated. As they no longer could hear their fat friend.
"How long will it take for us to be able to contact him again?," Kyle asked a little eager. He was finally being able to enjoy the presence of Cartman again, and honestly it was hard to admit he did miss it.
"Probably tomorrow," the blonde shrugged laying down on his bed, "maybe we should try asking the goths if they know how to bring a person back from the depths of hell."
"That sounds like a good idea," Stan chimed in.
The three were now determined on bringing Cartman back.
On the other side, Cartman found himself admiring his father's pent house. It had one of the most amazing views of hell. He stared at the window for a brief long period while seeing every store, house, streets, even the small from afar hell citizens.
And don't get him started on his gaming room! There was also a personal gym 'meh' who gives a damn about exercise. He continued looking through the home. Big kitchen, bathroom, room.
Wow, literal heaven.
There was a box full of condoms on one of the kitchen counters which his dad immediately hid when he found the boy inspecting the area.
He followed behind him with his arms cross on his back, he liked how much Eric was admiring his success with those big innocent looking eyes, though he knew deep inside that image, he was a little devil just like his mother. Both innocent looking yet easy to sugarcoat someone into giving them what they want, making them devilish.
He remembered venting with pride to his son Scott about being a Denver bronco and the games his won, all the attention he received because of it looking for praise from him, but received none but a small nod while he presided on listening to music. Maybe because he was a teen and no longer interested in hearing about their parents accomplishments and tales.
But Eric, oh small little Eric found everything he did amusing and exciting! He enjoyed that.
"Okay, uh.. Jack?," the boy spoke, uncertain what to call him.
"You can call me dad," The redhead added too quickly, he 'tsch' silently.
It went silent again. Jack figured it'll be a matter of time for things to settle down and fix on it's own.
Cartman had his mouth slightly agape staring at his father trying to pick on any slight hint of bluff in him. But found none. 'No one wanted to be his dad' no one dare tried to be.
Jack was starting to feel a little uncomfortable 'maybe it was too soon?' Before the boy spoke up.
"O-okay, dad," he said with a flat line as his mouth.
That word just felt so cursed coming out of his mouth.
Jack beamed.
[...]
A whole week has passed and the boys were no longer able to contact Cartman. Kyle began to worry if something must have happened to his idiotic friend while in search of an exit from hell.
They had failed miserably to summon Cartman back. Tried the various forms the goths have told them to do. But nothing worked. And now they had lost the only connection they had towards him, Cartman was just too much to bring back he supposed.
Stan had suggested that it may be because he was too fat to fit in any of the portals made. He found that funny cause it was most likely to happen.
He sigh.
The boys decided to just start looking for a new replacement. As they had already gripped on the idea on the other boy's return being less possible.
So here he was. Being the one chosen to pick the new Eric Cartman.
"So why again do I have to pick him?," he asked with a frown expression, having cupped his cheek with the palm of his hand.
"Because, the new Cartman has to be able to keep up with you," Stan stated the obvious.
Kyle raised a brow by that, "What's that supposed to mean?."
"It means, that if he were to be put in a stupid situation where he pissed you off enough to riled you up, then he must be able to budge through with it."
"Doubt it," He said bored. He wasn't interested in finding a new Cartman, he wanted his Cartman back. Their Cartman back.
"Okay, kid. You got the rules?," Stan questioned, eyeing a brunette chubby boy. His name was Tobias. The boy tilted his head not as sure.
"So.. I just can't fight back?," he asked displeased, wrinkling his nose. 'Kinda like cartman' Kyle thought.
"No. You fight back in a sketchy scheme to bite back at Kyle," Kenny explained balancing a pencil with his mouth, "you just let Kyle beat you up."
"But- that's not fair! How can I just let this dude just beat me up?."
Kyle was just standing next to him eyeing the boy. Already annoyed by this interaction. A good start he supposed.
"Dude, it's Kyle you just-" Stan gripped the bridge of his nose to calm himself down, "look, you be an ass, then Kyle beats you up for it. Get it? That's how their dynamic works."
Still not reassured by the answer the boy looked at Kyle in a stance for a fight.
Kyle then did a stance, about to prepare punching the kid. But before even giving him a throw, the boy flinched and cover himself up with his arms.
"Damn, what a pussy," Stan said.
"Ay! I ain't no pussy!," he shouted, his fist were clenched, and his cheeks were red with embarrassment, frowning his face.
"Go on," Kenny tune in, finally fully focusing on the boy, an eye brow raised.
"W-well.. you guys are a bunch of assholes! Fuck you guys!."
"Okay, okay," the blonde boy raised his hands, grinning from ear to ear, "and what am I?," he closed his eyes putting a hand in one of his ears waiting for the correct answer.
"A poor piece of shit!," the boy in question exclaimed, "you're a stupid hippie. That only -" he points at Stan. And continued bashing on all three of us.
Stan and Kenny were grinning widely while Kyle felt a little sting is his chest.
They found their Cartman.
[...]
Cartman on the other hand had been laying down on the living room couch, with a very thin blanket as the environment he was in was already quite warm. Atleast for what his father had explained to him. The weather is only based on just two season changes. Summer and 'winter'. Summer is burning hell, winter it's freezing hell as if it were wanting to snow in literal hell, but it never does. Ofcourse, they were in summer when he had arrived, and it'll be like that for the next eight months.
The TV was on and it was kinda late at night for what he supposed called 'hell hour'. Their night time.
His eyelids were half lifted, tired. He won't deny the first few days spending time with his dad we're great, with the exception of the crappy so called 'food' he made, it was just too.. let's say bland 'healthy'. Unlike his mom's amazing cooking nothing could compare. But he had adapted to it very quickly as Jack had promised him to go out for some yummy foods as a 'treat'. He supposed he could endure the torture for a couple more days as long as he was still able to play with all his video games.
But the more the clock ticks the more bored he gets, the more un-patience he gets. Jack also wasn't always home compared to his mother. He had work, and had explained to him this is how he owns such nice things and keeps things in check under 'their' rooftop. He was barely home, and not only that he'd come back with lady friends and takes them to bed with him, claiming they were there for business. What he's not aware of, is that he's already very familiar with the so called 'business' before. His mother has finally mellow down on it but this prick doesn't seem on ending it anytime soon as some college freshman.
He had guessed his former wife had ended up in heaven as she is no longer in the picture and the man never mentions her. Taking this as a opportunity to sleep around with as many women he could get, just like with his mother. He frown by the thought.
He sigh, as he knows better than to knock on the grown man's door. He knew he had taken a lady friend with him inside, he didn't even bother glancing at him before taking her inside. So he layyed there. In that silent room, all by himself hearing the TV noises slowly being blocked by his brain.
He missed south park.
He missed his friends, and his bitch of a mom.
He closed his eyes. And then he jolted back up.
'That's it!' He exclaimed to himself.
He went through all the pages of the books Jack had brought, claiming they could 'help' which he never bother bringing up again cause he was distracting Eric with other cool more interesting stuff than returning him back to South park. For Eric's surprise they were a bunch of cooking recipes 'nothing of actual use!', he frown angrily. 'That motherfucker!' Literally.
He quietly tip toe to another shelf and started going through each individual book but found nothing. He was getting desperate as he was wondering how could Jack keep that information from him when it was literally the whole reason he found him for.
Then, when he was about to give up a green book had ended up smacking his head 'ow!', it had fell from above the shelf. But there was something special about that book that made him peek inside. There was code written in the back part of the book. He wondered where to use it for but was immediately answered as he look at the front cover. It was the best hint.
He slowly open the front door to sneak out and successfully do so. He ran trough each hall way of that huge building and had entered the elevator tapping a button for the ground floor.
He waited patiently, and had entered the shallow hallway. The book was titled 'room fith'.
He open the room and for his luck, it was opened. Everything was empty, a plain green painted room. He stood there confused thinking in 'what' he had calculated wrong.
Before 'snap!' The ground open immediately letting him fall straight into some cushions. The fall didn't feel so deep. But the whole secrecy makes it all skeptical, as if there's something to hide.
He looked around the small room, it was adorned with many satanic symbols, candles, glasses with sand and there were plenty of papers spread in the floors like rituals. He examine each one and approach the table that had many finished and unfinished work. Building plans, maps from areas of hell he hasn't heard of. He figured this was all work of his father as he can recall his writing from the small notes he had left him in the counter before heading for work explaining how to use certain things of the kitchen and wishing him a 'have a nice hell day' before adding 'you're not allowed to go outside'. Kinda controlling not gonna lie.
He flipped through plans and saw many other rituals of summoning. Who knows, he may be able to summon Kyle here? He snorted of the thought of pissing his friend off by bringing him to hell.
But then stop his tracks when he looked under the table to find a small safe, his eyes widen at the revelation 'this is it! This is were he's supposed to add the code.'
"What're you doing there champ?."
He jolted scared turning into the opposite direction.
Jack was smirking slightly while having his arms cross.
"Guess you're enjoying the tour huh," he approached slowly stopping three steps away from Eric.
The boy gulped felling this huge uneasy felling between them, sweating uncontrollably. He felt small for the first time in his whole life, looking at the older man's eyes.
Before being knocked out.
[...]
He opened his eyes and felt his arms tied to a wooden surface unable to move, he notice once adjusting his vision that he was in fact tied up in a chair. He freaked out, this feels oddly familiar.
He then turned his gaze upwards looking straight ahead. Seeing his father sitting down in a couch from that same room, arms were cross around his chest, man spreading but his gaze was straight towards him. He gulped once more. 'He really looks like Scott right now'.
Jack immediately lightened up once he saw Eric awake, he then proceeded to speak.
"Oh, Eric you're awake!," he beamed, forcing a cheerful tone. He didn't want the boy to realize how disappointed he was for catching him trying to escape, "look, Eric, I'm not gonna hurt you," he tried justifying his actions while he stood up.
"You knock me out and tied me into a chair you crazy bitch!."
"BECAUSE someone decided to bash in a forbidden area," Jack defended, he disliked the naming but bit his tongue.
"Cause you lied to me of helping me get out! Those books you brought were all cooking recipes!."
"Well, yes, they will be of help once you're older, champ! I didn't lie," the red head continued explaining while searching through his drawer, "Eric I want you to know that I'm just doing this for the best for you."
The boy remained silent which gave Tenorman the opportunity to continue reasoning.
"I want you to be able to accomplish your goals, I want you to become successful and I want you to be able to follow my steps in hell."
"What? Fuck that! I don't want to be a business man!."
"Eric, I see so much potential in you and have no plans on letting you waste it like your brother."
Eric froze by the mentioned of Scott.
"Unless you'd prefer ending up living in a old dusty hotdog like your mother lead you too?," Jack said with a blank face showing a couple of prints that had many, and I meant many incidents involving Cartman, "When you first approached me, that same night I made a huge search and found so much information on you, Eric, so, so much. You're quite a special boy," he added with a little hum.
"Scott has lost all his marbles, and as hard it is to admit it. I don't see him giving a good name for the Tenormans."
"Fuck the Tenormans! I'm no Tenorman!."
"But you are, Eric," there was a glint of greed in those eyes, something that made Eric's skin scrawled, "in fact, you're more of a Tenorman than a Cartman," he took out a scrapbook from the left side of his drawer.
He flipped through it and stopped in one, deciding to show the boy what was in it.
It was a old newspaper with a young man, probably in his mid-thirties he had ginger looking features but it looked like him, a way older version of him. He had a smirk on while being dragged by cops in the picture, his features resemble pure chaotic vibes. You just knew by seeing a glance of this man, he was trouble.
The article had titled 'psycho man rigged presidential election'. Eric gulped again.
"That's your great grandfather," he then picked up another of his prints, "you know who also tried rigging a presidential election?," Jack added smirking while showing a picture of Cartman and the head of Disney along of millions of election votes.
He then showed him another article, he so called great grandfather was standing next to three other boys picking on one in peculiar, he supposed a friend. He seemed jewish as he had a star of david necklace on him. This article had nothing too chaotic on it, they just use those four teens as an example of 'what not to be'.
Then his dad showed him a picture of his three friends and himself. One where he was in fact, taunting his jewish friend.
He sigh.
"Okay? That means nothing! I want to get back home!."
"That's the thing, Eric, you're not," Jack said, calming placing delicately the scrap on top of the drawer, "I'm protecting you, by the evil of yourself, the evil of your great grandfather's soul on you and the evil of your mother's influence," he pointed, sitting back down comfortably in the couch.
"I'll actually put of good use of your skill and potentials, someone like you Eric should always waste their potential in something actually beneficial than to just fuck around with," Jack lit up a cigar while he continued his rant, "that's what your great grandfather did wrong, and that's what you're doing wrong. Putting your motives and desires into unbeneficial things, un important things. And for what? Just for a three second laugh before being dragged away to jail or to a 'pyscho ward'?," he denied with his head looking at his expensive shoes, smiling after emphasizing his last sentence.
"You mother fucker.." Eric murmured finally realized what the ginger meant, Jack smirked in understanding, "Scott.. he didn't just go crazy because of what I did, he was already going crazy before I enter his life I just pushed him forward to actually snap!," the boy exclaimed scared.
"Ding ding ding!," Jack nodded happily, "see, you're very smart."
Cartman really wanted to go, run away and hide himself under the warm covers of his bed, under his mother's care far away from this crazy bitch!
Jack had left claiming he'd get him some food.
There he was just sitting there afraid, he really prayed for a miracle, just one more miracle in literal hell!
He closed his eyes tight trying to imagine himself being just trapped in a really bad nightmare.
The boy found the switch in personalities amusing, as it were so sudden and unexpected. In a blink of an eye the man that was seen as a caring cool father turned into a crazy psychotic lunatic! He really started missing his mom.
He felt himself uncomfortable felling the ropes being sunken in his flesh, hurting him and he felt having cramps in his calves, it hurted like hell and he couldn't do anything about it. He began crying outta desperation.
Then, he felt a buzz in his ears once more 'guys?'
His eyes lit up.
"Is there someone there?," he asked sniffing his snot back inside as it was running down his mouth.
"Cartman?."
"Kyle?," the brunette boy smile, 'there was still hope after all!'
"Kahl! You gotta help me! Kahl!," the boy cried with no shame. It isn't unusual for him to seek help from his ginger friend when he had fucked up and needed help solving it, "I can't! I'm all tied up and I-I-! Bwaaahh!!!," he cried louder.
"Okay, Cartman calm down!," his friend responded, "what happened? Is everything okay?."
"No! Nothings okay you stupid fuck!," the chubby boy eyes were all puffed up and red, while he felt his throat dry up, "this fucker lied to me! He lieeed!"
"Who lied to you?," he didn't hear Kyle ask as he cut him off continuing explaining his current situation.
"I need help! I'm tied up in 'jak n off' hotel in room five the ground floor! I'm at the bottom!," He cried once again, between breaths he hold back tears, he was freaking out. He was scared, and he was alone.
Then snapped back nervously when he heard a door open from behind him.
"Hey, Eric. I got you some grilled cheese sandwiches in hopes for you to cheer up a bit, my little future super star," said Jack beaming mimicking his mother's tone, it had sent shivers down the boy's spine, "I don't want you gaining too much weight though, or you'll be seen as a piggy for the rest of your life. And no one, likes, pigs."
"Cartman? Are you still there? Cartman!?," he heard his friend's voice.
He remained silent not trying to reveal his last only solution outta this mess, blocking also Tenorman's hurtful words.
"Why Eric! Look at you, you look like a mess," Jack put the sandwiches aside while running to his drawer and taking out a box of tissues and wipes. He then approached the boy and started wiping his face. Cleaning all remaining leftover tears and the snot that had started to dry up in his mouth.
[...]
"Dude, how the hell are we gonna go find Cartman if he's in hell," Stan exclaimed confused about his best friend's claims.
"The only solution is one of us dying," Kyle said with a frown, determinant on finding cartman.
"Dude!?," the latter responded with a brow raised and his arms raised in 'wtf', "dude I don't want to die! There's so much I want to do" looking at the ground thinking about the thousands of board games he hasn't played yet.
"Yeah, me neither!," exclaimed, Tobias.
Kenny remained silent staring at the red head.
"No one has to die, but me," Kyle spoke, he lowered his gaze. He knew it was risky, "I'm offering myself to do it," but it was worth the shot.
"Kyle that's the most crazy shit I've ever heard you say!."
"It's the only way! Nothing else has worked!."
"No, I'll do it."
The three boys turned their head towards Kenny. He had a frown and he seemed to not fear losing anything. Cause he wouldn't.
Kenny had already tried getting back into hell, dying various times to see if he could find Cartman but for some reason he hasn't been able to get a hold of the underground world. Waking back to life the next day. As in some sorta temporary limbo.
"That's okay, Kenny," Kyle reassured with a smile," I know you have your siblings to care of.. and well, I know Ike would have my mom and dad to take care of him, just in case I don't come back."
"Kyle, I'll do it. Eric is my best friend after all," Kyle's words was heartwarming but he wasn't gonna risk losing another friend.
Kyle frown reconsidering it. He then proceeded to nod.
They had left the Marsh residence as they wanted to be as far as possible from any witnesses, they went inside the weed 'garden'.
They found a solid ground far away from the farm. Atleast enough for a bullet to not be able to hear from a distance.
They got into a circle and Kenny stood in middle of the three.
He took the gun out, and pulled the trigger with not even a second thought. But there was nothing, just a small click everytime he pulled the trigger.
"What the fuck?," the blond asked confused looking up at Kyle.
"Sorry, Kenny I couldn't let you do that," his friend stated before pulling out a gun out of his jacket and pointed at his head 'that crazy son of a bitch' Kenny thought eyes wide open in panic, "here goes nothing," 'BANG' was all he heard before hearing the other two boys scream.
"Kyle no!," Stan shouted with his hands gripped into his head staring at his now dead friend, his face covered in Kyle's blood, "Jesus christ!!."
"Holy fuck," the brunette boy said horrified, "you guys are crazy! I no longer want to be part of this stupid group!," he screamed horrified before dashing away no longer looking back.
[...]
"¡AHHH!," Kyle found himself screaming while falling straight into what it seems to be lava. He looked upwards meeting with a pair of people staring at him. Is he really in hell right now? Fuck, he needed to start behaving once he's back in south park. He got up and managed to get out of the pit with ease.
He looked around, people forming circles partying here and there. There was lights everywhere even though it was pretty much lit already. Stores, buildings even food stands. 'No wonder that fat fuck didn't complain about being hungry' he thought to himself. Hell didn't seem bad at all! Well with the exception of the public torture displayed in front of him, he didn't seemed to mind it as much as he felt he should. What the literal hell?
He went to what appeared to be a big wooden cartel for new hell residents with the instructions on how to get back in their feet and their new purposes and do's, 'fuck that', he went where there was a map with all the locations needed to know. Also, pamphlets. He picked one and opened it. He recall Cartman mentioning a hotel called 'jak n off' and pursued following the directions given.
He then stood in front of a yellow building.
Okay, first instruction checked. Now, room fifth of the ground floor. But he stopped before doing any further action. He recalled his friend claiming there was someone with him 'what if they're still there?' He thought before considering a different approach.
Meanwhile...
"Holy shit, Kenny! What do we do!?," Stan said in panic, gesturing the other boy's dead body.
"Okay, Stan. Just listen carefully," the blonde had his right hand as a 'stop' gesturing to calm down.
He saw his friend breathing heavily, closing his eyes trying to regulate his heartbeat and breathing.
'he's just a crazy as Cartman!' That realization made the boy's eyes widen, "Holy shit," He spoke, now gripping into Kenny shoulders while the other boy flinched by the sudden action, "that was just as crazy level as Cartman!," he exclaimed his concerns.
Kenny loosen up from the grip before picking Kyle's body from head to shoulder. He gesture with his head for the other boy to help him with the other half.
Stan hesitated a bit but followed through.
"Fuck."
[...]
"Hmhm hmm!," Jack nodded repeatedly when he had finished re-dressing his off spring. He had bought him a little business suite the other day but had found this time appropriate to give.
The boy had refused and complained when the man attempted to take his clothes off but then failed immediately from his strength. 'Something beneficial from being a Denver bronco' he thought. He proceeded to submit.
Once back tied in the chair, his father turned him around being front of a large mirror.
'Ofcourse he was handsome' but he did not like being force to do things against his own will.
"Eric Tenorman," the man spoke with pride, "doesn't that just sound right?."
Eric gulped. He hated that name.
"Look at you, looking like a professional business man already!," he beamed again, "I'll be right back I'm gonna go fetch some wine."
"When are you planning to untie me!?," the boy wince when he saw a spider slowly going down on him.
A laugh as it were a joke was made, "oh, Eric," he then walked out.
None long after he had heard a loud 'thump' from behind him, he looked instead in the mirror and his eyes widen of excitement.
"Kahal!"
"Cartman?," the boy asked while standing up, he had fallen down from the cushions, ass straight to the ground, "Holy shit, dude! You alright?," he asked approaching him, he proceeded to untie the boy.
Kyle looked around a bit and proceeded to look at the boy that was stretching his back. He heard some cracking and popping.
'He looked like shit'
"We have to get outta here!," Cartman said before dragging Kyle from hand to hand outta the dark room. He was grateful he manage to see how his father summoned a door. But he stopped returning to the safe and grabbing the book and papers that were in there, once again gripping onto Kyle's hands dragging him out.
Once they were safe. They had ran out of the building, running towards the entrance of hell through the amount of new people that had arrived, and found themselves hidden behind 'Sussie's Buttocks' club.
Cartman sigh and Kyle just watched him with a frown brow.
With out further warning Cartman hugged the boy tight leaving Kyle speechless tensing his shoulders and his hands were up in the air unable to figure out if to correspond or just let the boy finish. He decided the second option.
"Thank you, Kyle! You came! I can't believe it!."
The boy loosen up the tension he had felt on his shoulders and just kept silent, letting his arch rival embrace him with his warmth. He could feel Cartman's rapid heart beat.
"Just so you know, I'm just here cause I couldn't stand your replacement," he said finally getting out of the boy's grip.
"Ay! You guys replace me already!?," Cartman protested angry while pouting.
The ginger smirked. With out realizing he felt himself hugging the boy tight. 'Fuck, he actually missed him', he buried his head under Cartman's shoulders as he felt him tense.
Kyle then let go, gazing at Cartman who had his eyes widen and the most heated red cheeks, mouth agape 'he looked gay' he thought. The boy then proceeded to lean towards him causing Cartman to panic as he weakly slapped him backwards snapping him out to his senses.
"Okay so who are we hiding from?," the red head spoke while he dust off the dirt on his jacket.
"Jack Tenorman."
Kyle's attention back to Cartman, in shock, "your dad?."
He nodded before vomiting. Everthing was all so overwhelming. Everthing his father revealed, his great grandfather and how home sick he felt, how much he missed his friends and mom. His insides twisted as he felt shivers all over him.
He made sure to point at Kyle's seamlessly new shoes though
"Ow gross, dude!."
[...]
Kenny found himself desperately wanting to go to hell but no matter how much he tried, he just couldn't. As if there were something blocking him by going.
He sigh, legs crossed next to Kyle's rotten body, flies piling up around him. He and Stan had hid themselves in Randy's shed. They weren't certain if to burry him or not so they toss him in there while both took turns checking outside for any future witnesses which they failed miserably because Stan's dad had went for a quick smoke hidding from Sharon, and looked at them, glancing at both boys before looking at Kyle 'ohhh' he murmured, both brows were raised before closing the door slowly, leaving.
Kenny then took out the ouija board and place it in the ground. Might aswell try to contact Kyle.
"Any luck?," Stan asked wincing from the smell that was coming out of his best friend.
"No," Kenny tried cutting some more blood out of his wrist, carefully not making the wound any deeper. They needed a living mortal's blood to be able to contact the dead.
"Do you think he went to heaven?."
"Nah, man. You really think one of us will end up there after the amount of shit we've down?," he had went to heaven before but it was a one time thing, after he started simply caring less about his deaths he became bolder and is no longer admitted into heaven.
Besides he recalled Kyle unintentionally killing a bunch of Canadians that was enough reason to be sent to hell.
"Good point."
Cartman and Kyle found themselves looking through rituals and plans, they inspected the book while Kyle flipped through pages then stopped pointing at one.
"Here 'lay the one and only chosen one for the path to open, a bright light as blindfold being turned to one'," then continued reading the next paragraph, " 'the second gripped to life, will become sacrifice to give light as they are two'."
"What's that supposed to mean?."
"As they are two.." Kyle reread trying to add sense to what was written, brows knitted together, "that's it," He said looking at the drawings of two men one represented death, the other life. While life was seen switching places with death.
He flipped through the rest of the pages reading new paragraphs and prophecies.
'Misplace the two bounded souls and fear it's wrath between worlds, as they are one'
'Life and death which are shown to be bounded by a soul'
'Death is life, life is death, a curse forming in between them as the new bounded soul is created'
He flipped through the next page and eyes widen. It was a drawing of Kenny and Cartman. 'Holy shit'
"Did you find anything?," Cartman asked while laying down on his stomach, making paper airplanes with the loose pages that were spread on the floor as he had gotten bored.
"Well, there you are my special little boy."
Both boys gasped turning around while they got up, Kyle having gripped the book on his chest. He walked backwards placing an arm on Cartman backing away slowly shielding him
'Cartman was our way out' he told himself, justifying his actions as if it were the first time he found himself protecting the fat fuck. Which it wasn't.
Jack stood there with his arms crossed behind his back, grinning eyeing the book then looking back at Kyle.
"I see you brought a friend to play, Eric," he took a pistol out from the inside of his suite pocket.
Both dashed outta there running through the multiple people that were all formed in circles. Hearing Tenorman shout from a far 'Ay! come back here!'
'Like father like son'.
Kyle panted hardly while trying to grasp some air, Cartman was knocked out cold on the floor. Hopefully they were far enough from Tenorman.
A buzzing feeling in his ear caught his attention, he held it because of the intense pain it did as if that were gonna stop it. Blood trailing down his cheek he looked at the hand he had held himself with 'my ear is bleeding'.
"Kyle?," the boy in question jolted.
"Kenny!?"
"Dude finally! We were worried sick for you!."
"Is he there? Kyle? Are you there!? You crazy piece of shit! Jesus christ!," Stan chimed in," are you alright? Did you find Cartman?."
"Yeah, he's right here," he looked at the boy that was now trying to stand up. He offered a hand while the boy reached out and was pull up to his feet again. He looked tired, uncharacteristically tired. It gave Kyle an uneasy feeling as he remembered what he had read 'Misplace the two bounded souls and fear it's wrath between worlds, as they are one' he assumed Cartman may be 'life'.
"Okay cool, have you guys find a way out?."
"Is that the hippie?," Cartman asked finally paying attention to the buzzy feeling of his own ears.
"Yeah.." Kyle whispered more to himself than to anyone else, "Kenny?"
"Yeah? I'm here dude."
"Look this is gonna sound crazy but,"
'Bang'
"¡AAH!," Kyle looked at Cartman who had screamed in horror, then looked at his now wounded chest half lifted eyes before feeling his legs weakened.
'Fuck' was the only thing that came out before knocking out on the floor.
'Kyle!?'
'Kyle!?'
'Kyle!'
The boy slowly felt himself waking up by the sound of Stan's voice rumbling in his ears. He grunted, feeling sharp pains in his chest were he was previously shot, but managed to stand up.
He looked at his hands an feet, then his chest. It seemed to have healed as if it never happened 'had he dreamt it?' He looked around and found himself in the entrance of hell once more. Cartman was no longer at sight.
"Fuck," he frown 'this was being dragged too much', "Kenny, are you there?."
"Yeah man, what happened? We lost you for like an hour!."
"An hour? Holy shit.. okay, Kenny. I'm not crazy but I think you're 'death'."
"What."
"Yeah. I have a satanic looking book on me that has you drawn in here stating that you're bound into a soul."
"W-what?.."
"Yeah.. as crazy as it sounds but you're bonded. Not only are you bounded but to Cartman of all people."
"What!?," he heard both friends shout in unison.
"Look I don't know much for sure, but that's what I've gotten from what's written here. It says we need both of you to be able to get out."
"But how? I'm not allowed in hell."
"What?," he found himself confused by that comment but shrugged it off, "look 'the chosen soul must be into one of understanding to open a door through life and death' i- I honestly got lost by that point," Kyle admitted nodding to himself.
" 'The chosen soul must be into one of understanding to open a door through life and death..'," Kenny found himself repeating the words. He frowned.
Cartman and him were bounded.. but how? But why? Life and death. If he was death that makes Cartman life. Which having him in the underworld makes it not possible to be 'life'.
Death.. death is life. Which would makes sense if he were to die and revive.
Would that mean switching places with Cartman? As he found himself in life and he in death. All this is messing up his mind.
Would that mean what's been blocking him from both heaven and hell and keeping him in a sorta limbo state is because he's slowly becoming life? And Cartman..
'fuck'
"Kenny?," Stan's voice snapped him back.
"We need to find a way to bring Cartman back and quick!."
The chubby boy felt his body weakened while he was carried by his father. He had taken him to the rooftop of the building he owned while gripping tight with steel chains his wrists and legs into some torture table he had put there.
Half lifted eyes stared to the ground. He felt like shit.
His father stood there with clasped hands eyeing him everywhere as he was some golden trophy, as he were just waiting for something. But he couldn't grasp what it was.
"Did I ever mentioned you that Liane was part of a cult?," spoke Jack.
Cartman just kept silent as he began coughing badly.
The grown man walked towards him taking out a tissue from his pocket cleaning some of the trail blood he had cough out 'the fuck!?'
"When I first met your mother it wasn't at some stupid party your town folks had told you about. I met her in a cult meeting. I was young and was told they will be free booze," He reveal while fixing the boys now untied tie, "we felt attraction immediately and bonded over the fact that we were both there for booze, laugh it off and things just lead to an other," continued while shrugging.
Cartman found himself feeling his muscles spasm.
"I'm the good guy Eric! I would've never asked for this to have happen to you if I knew," he then place his hand onto his chest as an innocent demeanor, "your mother is to blame."
"The thing is, unlike me, Liane ended up getting too into the cult meeting and had unintentionally set herself up with two other soon to be parents, she had dragged me in, unaware of what would happened. She found it silly and fun and I found it a little creepy but followed through cause I was just too wasted to care about the odd rituals the other members were putting us in 'everthing for a piece of that' I kept telling myself."
The boy cut him off he began to have various seizures that lasted for up to three seconds before repeating itself, he felt his mouth grasping for air and being choked by his own saliva. His fingers twitched and his feet curled.
"And then, months after, you were born," unfazed the man wiped the saliva off his cheeks, "ofcourse by the time you were born I had no longer any contact with Liane and that so called meeting became a fuzzy memory for me."
"But, Eric," he approached the boy, face to face, "this, it's life changing," the boy heard while still trying to grasp for air, his vision long gone as it became blurry.
"Imagine, a Tenorman being able to switch in between worlds! Being able to use this curse and becoming one of the most powerful beings on both worlds," He ranted for himself, with every word being said his eyes dilated. Malicious, greed, selfishness surfacing, "not being able to die! HaHA! We'd be unstoppable!."
'Bang'
Tenorman fell into the floor.
Kyle then reloaded his shotgun while two other boys stood next to him.
"Stan help me with Cartman!," Kenny order running towards the almost unconscious boy. Stan nodded following.
They had manage to summon Satan while being in the upper world. Luckily Satan owed Stan a favor and it was just all convenient.
They managed to release Cartman by pressing a button that was place under the table with the label 'release' on it.
Kenny held the boy who convulsions worsened.
"Eric can you hear me?."
"K-kinny? Dammit kinny! Get out my death sequence," the boy complained even though his eyes looked elsewhere.
"You're not gonna die fat boy! You're already in hell."
"Oh, right," His body stiffened trying his best to take control but failed miserably once more, "how's it going?."
The comment made the blonde boy cracked a smile, "look Eric," he gently caress cartman's hair.
'That's gay' he heard the boy remark but ignored it.
"It'll be hard to believe this.. but I die," Kenny revealed, "like all the time," he sigh, feeling the glances of his other two friends on him.
"I know."
Kenny's eyes widen, "no, like I mean it, I die all the time!."
"I know," his chubby friend frown feeling stupid by hearing his best friend seemingly finding it hard for him to remember the obvious. And because of the condition he's in 'duh' he didn't feel like arguing, "I can tell you death by death, each and single one with detail and date."
Kenny was left with his mouth opened, speechless, he couldn't believe it. 'Is he really telling the truth or is he fucking with me?' All this time he's been looking for someone atleast one person that could remember. And he was there all along infront of him, someone he least expected.
"And you didn't bother on telling me!?," Kenny said angry, he felt his eyes water.
Cartman twitch in his arms, "nobody seemed to mentioned anything, and you never asked. I figured it may have been a bad dream or not as important cause nobody seem to believe me the few times I did mention it, they all looked at me weird as it I we're delusional," the boy admitted.
Now that he thought about it. The times he has admitted to someone about his curse, Cartman was never present. Which meant he had never given the opportunity to answer him. And when he mentioned it he was either dead or not around to tell.
Like if it were intentional for both boys to not be able to share this moment until now.
"You know what's messed up?," cartman's voice snapped him back, he had a weak smile plastered, "I began to be so use to it, it was easy to use your deaths. Like the time you were in the death bed or the time I had convinced everyone it would be best to disconnect you to have your psp, or being able to better my vision stealing one of your eyes, I knew you'd come back, you always did."
Kenny's eyes sparked in amusement 'he really did remember'.
"But the first few times.. kinny they were horrifying, I still feel uneasy but it isn't as before," his body twitch some more while he complained about the pain in his arms and legs, "I remember the rats eating your flesh, I remember trying to shoo them away cause you still weren't dead."
Kenny watched his friend with such warmth as if it were a cute tale he was retelling.
"The time Kyle killed you with a chainsaw," 'I what?' They heard their ginger friend asked confused but ignored it, "being killed by a bull, eaten by some pterodactyl, by oral sex, squished, run over," the boy shaked, the pain decreasing the more closer he got to kenny. On the other hand kenny was feeling immense warmth in his chest, like literal fire. 'Hell, It's really burning!'
Kenny remembered always being close in a certain way with Cartman, they even were once trapped together by his soul because the stupid idiot had eaten his ashes.
He glance down at Cartman who had let his head fall into his lap, smiling. 'This was kinda gay' he thought.
He felt the boy latching on to him, and he won't deny he felt the sudden urge to do the same which he unintentionally did. The burning sensation in his chest increased the pain, becoming unbearable 'fuuuuuck!'
On the other hand Cartman never felt more peaceful in Kenny's arms, he felt like he was in the clouds and couldn't recall why the sensation just felt like he was falling but there was no fear of an impact just comfort with in the clouds and sky.
Stan and Kyle didn't bare interrupt the two boys as they knew it was needed to get out and Kenny knew how to do it but they couldn't help feeling a little discomfort as this felt intimate and private. Atleast for Stan it wasn't displeasing just disturbing while with Kyle it was the opposite. He found the boys sudden closeness displeasing he just didn't know why.
Sudden the back door sling open reveling Jack. Kyle prepared his gun and pointed at him making him stop in his tracks.
"You guys don't know what're you're doing! Fuck, ¡no!," He exclaimed once he saw Kenny holding on to Cartman and vice-versa. He knew there was no longer takes back as their ritual bound was already in the stages of ending.
The two boys burst into flames seemingly showing no response to it. Atleast from Cartman's part, internally for Kenny it was a pain in the ass but he didn't show it. Sweat begin to pop up in his skin and his nails digged up in Cartman's suit, wincing his eyes shut.
Their silloette formed a door which proceeded to opened.
"Dude! I think it's the portal!," Stan exclaimed getting near it, while Kyle shot Tenorman in the head once more before following Stan. Not after glancing at Kenny and Cartman before jumping through the portal.
Cartman then layyed down flat finally letting go of Kenny. The blonde watched him while he started twisting in pain 'this is it' he then looked at Cartman, suddenly understanding before proceeding to enter the portal, finally vanishing.
Kenny sigh as he turned into ashes finally dying.
[...]
"Morning dudes," Kenny salute, beaming. He was in a good mood after all.
"Sup Kenny," Stan greeted.
"Hey Kenny," Kyle added.
"Cartman hasn't arrived yet?."
"That fat fuck probably forgot to turn his alarm on," the red head spoke with a yawn.
"Or, he did set an alarm but ignored it," Stan added.
"Either sound possible."
Not long after Cartman got on the bus greeting them.
"Hey dipshits!," he proceeded to take a seat next to Kenny who grinned at him, "so how you guys dealing after the hell incident?," he asked.
Stan and Kyle just raised a brow confused.
"What're you talking about, fatass?," Kyle then added while frowning not wanting to deal with Cartman's shit again this early in the morning.
"Yeah, dude, you alright?," Stan chimed in.
Kenny stared at Cartman still beaming while he saw the bigger boy's face turned in disbelief.
"Dude! I literally died a horrible death not long ago! Remember? Hell!? Kyle you literally went to save me!," he screamed.
"Did he also came in a shining armor?," Stan teased while both best friends, then, howl in laughter.
Cartman pouted bitterly. Kenny put a hand on his shoulder understanding well enough the feeling. The boy glance at him.
"Welcome to the club," he smiled.
Cartman looked up at the two boys infront of him that still found themselves laughing then looked at Kenny, smiling back.
"This sucks ass."
They both chuckled.
[...]
Kyle found himself approaching Cartman while they were entering the school entrance.
"Hey, fatass."
"What up," the fat boy answered while he took out his phone.
"About me saving you did I also bring a sword?," he bite his upper lip before bursting into laughter.
"Ha ha very funny Kahal," the boy said bitterly, "actually not only did you showed up in a shining armor, a sword, but you also kissed me on the lips as I was the damsel in distress." honestly was not the best combat but it was the first thing that came into spot. He wasn't planning to let Kyle have the last word after feeling still bitter about the red head not recalling the previous events.
Kyle was left baffled by that. For some reason Cartman's stupidity was beyond compression but the mystical accusation left him speechless.
Cartman had already proceeded on leaving to class but Kyle just stood there blank hearing a small noise in his ears that kinda sounded like 'hootie and the blowfish'.
In class Kenny had both his hands clenched, excited. He never felt more happy knowing someone does remember! Not only that, but the bound ritual just made their bound strengthen, as he watched Cartman knowing the other boy felt the same. He knew the feelings were true cause he felt it, they both felt each other when their soul united once more 'as gay as that sounds'. Cartman looked back at him sharing that same beaming felling before returning to bother Wendy interrupting her speech with slurs an unwanted opinions.
He always felt alone knowing no one remember him dying, an as much as he had his moments despising Cartman there was now this warmth comforting feeling that someone other than him knew, even if it were a bigot like Cartman. It's not like he could complain much after all, they will be forever bounded by a soul so there's no preventing being connected to one an other.
But he'd care less, he wasn't alone no more.
He smiled once again, he's been feeling all giggly all morning, he just couldn't help it. He was happy and today was just a nice super fantastic day.
School had ended as the bell rang.
The four boys walked with each other discussing what they'll do this evening as a squad.
"What about boar-"
"Stan, I swear to God if you say 'board games' once more I'll kill myself," Cartman interrupted by grunting.
Stan frowned.
"No offense dude, but Cartman's right. We've been playing boards games three times in a row for weeks," Kyle chimed in.
Kenny nodded. He knew Stan had developed a new obsession with board games when he moved to the farm and starting hanging out with Tolkien, which we didn't seem to mind much, but it had gotten boring being repeated multiple times everytime they hang out.
"What about cards?," the blonde suggested.
"Same shit," Cartman rolled his eyes with that.
Is that 'hootie and the blowfish' they began hearing in the background?
"Does anyone hear that?," Stan asked looking around.
"No," Kyle quickly stated.
"Anyways, what about basketball?," Cartman suggested while putting his attention on the others, his hands gripped on to his waist.
"You know what? That doesn't sound like a bad idea Cartman," Stan agreed while turning his focus onto Kyle who seemed kinda spaced out.
"Hm?," the boy said before barfing on Cartman.
'BLEEEEARGH!'
"Ah! Gross dude! Wtf Kahl!?," he wince disgusted wiping off the barf from his jacket, "disgusting!," he kept complaining.
"Sorry!."
"Woah dude," Stan exclaimed.
"I think breakfast didn't do me too well," the boy explained while rubbing his stomach, nauseous.
"Fuck you! You're so fucking disgusting!," Cartman kept rambling angry while walking off, seemingly going home, "ew! Screw you guys I'm going home."
"Sorry, Cartman!," Kyle apologized once more before returning his attention to the others, "so is basketball still on the list?."
"Hell yeah."
Cartman not long after joined the other three with a new jacket staying farther away from Kyle claiming that he didn't want the ginger to barf on him again which the boy rolled his eyes from and Stan calling him out a 'pussy' while continuing playing the game.
It was a nice evening with the four boys peacefully enjoying their company as everthing had turned back to normal.
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neorxnawangs · 1 year
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while it 1986 is subtle and mature in a way it 2019 could never be i have to be so honest right now and say that it 2019 really went all out with the romance. you can argue all you want but jay ryan absolutely carried as ben. the longing. the desire. all completely there but constantly held back by his understanding of beverly and never expecting anything from her. the increased importance of the poem to the point where it’s clearly a cringeworthy copout but mr ryan is so full of heart that i watch the final fight and cry because the last thing ben plans on doing is letting beverly know someone loves her and then she reaches out for him and pulls him out from being buried alive and it’s all very poetic to me. do you understand me SHE PULLS HIM OUT. woman who has found love in all the wrong places and man who is innately alone come together because he wants her to know someone loves her honest and true! it is so lame but i love them very dearly. don’t even get me started on the dog and the yacht and the beautiful dreams. it 2019 is my pride and prejudice and jay ryan’s big brown eyes are my matthew macfadyen’s hand flex
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gikairan · 1 year
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What I need most from Mistborn era 3 is more canon Marsh and Kelsier interactions
Because, despite being brothers, they've never really had many on-page interactions...
And until I know their exact relationship dynamics, I'm just going to imagine a modern era Kelsiers favourite joke is to try and show Marsh ~hilarious~ memes on his phone, knowing full well his brother can't see what's on the screen
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ardate · 1 year
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4, 8, 9, 30 :]
4. Fav character/subject that's a bitch to draw
Honestly? Humans as a whole, still. I started art a long time ago, originally mostly focusing on animals and creatures, til I started drawing humans sometime in middle school - and I never stopped drawing them since! But yet, somehow, even though by now I probably have drawn more humans and human-adjacent characters than not with all those years, beasts are still much easier and come more naturally to me. Maybe those very early years wired my brain this way hbghb
8. What's an old project idea that you've lost interest in
Oh holy fukc so many of those uuuuuuuh,, right now the one that comes to mind is this old story I had made up in middle/highschool - something about a kind of death land, a sort of limbo, and the ghost lords that 'ran' it; and the main character having to go through it to bring his love back from the dead (orpheus and eurydice inspired). And though even then I wasn't particularly optimistic about my chances of going through with it, I really wanted to make a comic of it! Obviously, never happened. I should redraw those old OCs one of these days hgbghb
Have a sneak peek of what my art (and one of my ghost lords) looked like back then. Not the full pic cuz even just sharing this lil tidbit is hurting my ego
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9. What are your file name conventions
I've been meaning to change it cuz it's no longer organized enough for my taste! My file themselves don't have any fancy names, they're usually just named after their subject (like 'demoman_sketch' or 'pernelle_portrait' or 'morribel_reference' etc). Of course, no accent in the file names since that renders them unstable and makes it easier for them to get corrupted, same (to a lesser extent) with spaces, so I always use an underscore instead.
So rather than by name, my organization goes by folders: • First off I have a folder per art program (one for Photoshop, After Effects, Corel Painter, Krita, etc), each of which have two folders, 'Unfinished' and 'Finished'. The latter usually only has the PNG renders, while the Unfinished folder houses the PSD (or other) files. Sometimes I'll have a 'Done' subfolder there for the files of pieces that i've finished, but most of the time they'll hang in there in the middle of WIP files forever • And in those Un/Finished folders, I have subfolders for the subject of the art piece (one folder per fandom (like TF2, Rayman, etc), a folder for commissions, one folder per original story, etc) so I can easily find what I'm looking for.
I plan on changing my naming conventions though, keep my folders but name my files with dates at the beginning (year/month/day), then theme (fandom/story/commission, etc), and then the piece's name.
30. What piece of yours do you think is underrated
I'm... Not sure? 🤔 To be honest I post my art to share it but I don't really have expectations regarding its reception from the public... I used to! Back when I was on deviantArt. And honestly it sucked, getting legitimately upset when an art piece didn't get enough digital attention, not enough internet points. But I've grown past it years ago, so I don't really have many feelings if a piece does badly anymore. I've had OC pics get like 2 likes and nothing else and I felt fine with it ghbgh
Don't get me wrong I still want them to do well, I still want people to reblog my art, and nothing brings me more joy than comments in the tags because that's a direct reaction to my art, which always feels very personal and legitimately touches me. But not having expectations means I don't really feel disappointed as much
The last time I've had the thought 'oh i expected this to do better' was for my HLVRAI zine piece, but that's about it!
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garbage-empress · 1 year
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Florida pisses me off because they have the coolest flora and fauna of the continental US but are like "we must destroy these marshes and shoreline to build shitty suburbs that will sink below sea level in 10 years anyway because if Harold can't see the water from his back window he will shit himself to death."
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overthinkinglotr · 11 months
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Sam and Frodo are just like Orpheus and Eurydice. Frodo is Eurydice, doomed to die — we’re repeatedly told, again and again, that Frodo is fated lose his life in the quest for the Ring. “In his heart Frodo begins to understand the Quest will claim his life,” Galadriel says, and she’s right. Frodo’s death is constantly foreshadowed, as if it’s inevitable; Frodo himself begins to feel it is inevitable. Because of the Ring he’s drawn irresistibly to the Dead City, to the dead faces in the marshes, and to his own self destruction and inevitable death.
But Sam is Orpheus. He acknowledges Frodo is fated to die but he refuses to let it happen. He journeys into the depths of hell, the depths of the underworld, to fight against that inevitability and steal Frodo back from death itself. On one side, you have the inevitability of Frodo’s death, which Frodo himself has accepted; you have all of destiny and fate and mortality; you have Frodo’s own growing weariness and even suicidality— and on the other side, you have one person who is in love with Frodo and wants him to live.
And Sam wins!
He does the impossible! He does the equivalent of making the God of Death weep with his song; in the book he even finds Frodo in the orc tower of Mordor while singing a song of hope, in what feels like a reference to Orpheus and Eurydice. He journeys where almost no man has ever gone before and he rescues the person he loves from the jaws of their inevitable death. He takes on all of destiny and fatality with nothing but his love, and he wins!
But even after all of that, they’re still parted.
Sam fell in love with someone who was doomed by the narrative, and he saved him from his fate, but now they can’t be together until he’s healed.
There’s so much hope in the end of Frodo and Sam’s story though, especially because Sam follows Frodo across the sea. They’re not parted forever; there’s so much hope that because Sam saved him they can now reunite, in another life, and that this time their story will end differently.
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shatteredminds · 2 years
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The Tăchoveșh's(Luka/Azura, Sydall, Aphy, and Ziarus): *Sleeping*
The Átøsál's(Ulfric and Lana): *Sleeping*
The Kíngslánð's(Sebastian, Zila, Toros, and Drerena): *Sleeping*
The Cánïa's(Lucy, Rodia, and Restus): *Sleeping*
The Hölíá's(Uriel, Kena, Raphiel, and Lillith): *Sleeping*
Their fucking army of children: *Partying to I gotta feeling by Black eyed peas, Bohemian Rhapsody by Queen, ext somewhere on the island*
(And yes even the infants and underaged kids are there just vibeing.)
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Being Jason Todd's kid (Platonic)
Warning: at the beginning y/n has a shitty mom and neglectful (+abandoning them) plus a mention of Jason’s death of being beaten
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You knew for a long time your mom didn’t love you, even your young 8 year old mind could tell
From the way she looked at you with disdain and disgust
She was still your mom though so you loved her
Loved her despite the yelling and sending you to your room with a granola bar as your dinner
It was fine
Everything was fine
All you had to do was keep doing your best to make her love you like in the books you’d read at school
So you did your best to appease her
You’d bring her the sticks that would create the smelly wisps of smoke that would stain her gnashing teeth as she yelled at you
Or bring in the amber coloured drink in glass bottle she liked
You tried it once cause the tap didn’t make water anymore but you didn’t like it
It felt as if it was burning your throat and tongue as it slithered down your parched throat like venom from a snake
When she feel asleep on her chair you’d place a blanket around her but left the tv on
She got mad at you cause of that the first time
You made rules in your mind on how to properly dance around the tiggers that would make her angry
Some you didn’t really understand as to why she got angry over it but you avoided it anyways
Just keeping quiet and silently going about your day to make her as happy as you could
She never took you out much, often leaving you at home when she’d get groceries or went to work
But as a surprise she told you that you’d be going with her to carry the bags
It was night, but you didn’t mind it much since you’d always preferred it
Made getting your mom the smelly sticks easier when it was the man at the cashier at 711
Eventually as you walk further into the city with her you see that your in an area you’d never been before
It’s scary, really scary but you don’t say a word
You don’t say anything when she tells you to wait at the curb beneath a streetlight as she walks off
Cold concrete kissing your palms as you sit there, a lone 8 year old waiting
Still wearing pyjamas and barefoot as the cold chill of the night began to set in
It’s nothing you can’t handle, besides she’d be back soon
She said she would
And if your actions were right you couldn’t break a promise
She’s just taking awhile is all
Maybe it was busy!, yeah that had to be it
People were just busy shopping cause they were at work in the day
So you wait some more
And some more
And now your shaking as you hug yourself
You can’t go home cause you don’t k is the way back and your afraid to leave incase she came back and got mad
There’s a slight chatter sound as your teeth clatter from how much your shaking
The tears feel so cold against your cheeks that you swear they might become frozen to them
There isn’t any noise except for the occasional honk streets away, the night is calm
Until there’s a marsh crash and curses come from the alleyway across from where you sit
It makes you go still and tense
Until a man exits it wearing an odd red mask with glowy eyes
He stumbles out and curses with a weird almost electric sound to his voice before he locks eyes with you
“Oi kid!, what are you doing out so late and alone?”
He takes as step forwards and you scoot back a little bit, still shaking as he now notices how your not wearing much on a cold night
He takes off his jacket
“If I give you my jacket will you tell me your name?”
“I heard I’m not supposed to talk to strangers…can you tell me your name?”
At this nods and as he got closer you dont back away like before
You let him place the large jacket over your shoulders, it’s big and bulky and reminds you of a blanket with the fluff on the inside
He says his name is red hood, something that makes your eyes light up with familiarity
You’d heard about him from your mom watched the news, mentions if the name but never what he looked like
There was also something with him and Batman? But you didn’t really know a lot about it from the snippets you heard
“Does that mean your a hero?.”
“I wouldn’t exactly say that. But close enough”
“That’s cool, mom said that hero’s were a sham. I always thought their cool, I’m y/n by the way”
“Kid how old are you?, what are you doing out here?”
You go to hold your fingers up to show him but you don’t remember what’s past five
Mom pulled you out of preschool saying she’d Homeschool you but never did
Whatever you had learned was from tv and the limited books you could read
You begin to tear up in frustration
“Hey it’s ok kid. Second question then, what are you doing out here”
“Mom said she needed groceries and she let me come this time so I can carry the bags. She said that I had to wait here till she’s come back”
He goes rigid at that but you don’t notice
You curl up in a ball and zip up the coat around you
Now properly protecting you from the cold except for your feet
“Mr hood can you wait with me. I don’t wanna be alone”
“Sure thing”
So he sits himself beside you on the curb
To pass the time he pulls out a small book labeled “pride and prejudice” and begins reading it to you
It’s nice having someone to read with
He uses different voice for different characters, giving them posh accents that make you giggle
But as time ticks on he notices how your shoulders droop more
Along with your smile
Eventually he stops reading and puts his book away
“She said she’d come back…she’s coming back right?”
It sounds so broken as you ask this, you turn your head to look at him and he sees your reddened eyes that have tears lining them
The only sounds you can make are choked sobs and sniffles as the masked vigilante pulls you into a hug
You grab onto him tightly, small hands digging into the metal plating of his armour
Afraid he’d leave as well just as everyone else in your life did
“Do you have a dad you can go to?”
“Mom said he left because of me…so I don’t think so. Do you think if I go home she’d be mad at me?”
He feels his heart shatter a bit at that and he doesn’t know how to respond other than gently rubbing the back of your head
Jason at this point in his life knows he’s not in the best place to care for himself let alone a kid. He’s a walking corpse back from the dead, wanting to get revenge as his mind unscrambles itself day by day
But as you sob he knows he can’t let go
Those memories of his mother staining his mind along with the sound of your crying
The betrayal similar to this where she willingly led her child to a certain death
He also doesn’t trust the foster care system nor any system for a matter of fact
He’s seen his share of messed up kids that have been created through them
So in that moment Jason makes an impulsive decision he wouldn’t ever regret
“Do…do you wanna come with me then?. You gotta keep my identity a secret though, k?”
“O-ok Mr hood”
“Just call me Jason kid”
Yeah so first couple weeks Jason struggles since he hasn’t exactly looked after a child before
Your an independent kid from the conditions you lived in before but that makes him worry quite a bit
Especially when you have a small snack and call it a dinner
So he just takes small steps, and also reads parenting books…a lot of them actually
He still has to set you up a room so he lets you take his bed while he sleeps on the couch
It’s easier that way cause he’s afraid of accidentally hurting you while having a nightmare
Which he still gets quite frequently
You don’t seem to mind, just thanking him for sleeping in a nice bed and having blankets that properly keep you warm
Before you came along he kinda just got takeout but he knows that isn’t the healthiest thing so he actually starts cooking
He’s pretty decent at it due to helping Alfred and for like the first time in your life you have a proper meal
You have to hold back tears and it makes his heart crack a bit at the sight
Jason hires an online teacher before sending you to school due to the fact your a bit behind in what a child your age needs to know and he doesn’t trust that Gotham is safe enough yet
Speaking of which he’s protective, like real protective for good reason though
He’s still running around at night with Bruce chasing him along with Gotham being a cesspool
So it’s safe to say that it’s not exactly a safe place for you
Won’t admit it but he purposefully buys you clothes that are red cause he thinks it’s cute
Especially if you say you want more red cause it reminds you of him
100% makes it a tradition to read a chapter of a book to you each day and teaches you to read better through it
He gets better from time and experience
Whenever he comes home battered and angry he makes sure to take his anger out on something before he heads into the apartment
He doesn’t wanna accidentally scare you or snap by accident
You try to help him with his wounds (as best as an 8 year old can) and he melts
Another thing that makes him melt is when he walked in on you trying on his helmet and leather jacket
He laughed and then played with you before putting on some ABBA that y’all danced to
It takes awhile but once he gets your room set up he’s really proud and happy with himself for once when seeing your smile
It was when you thank him that you accidentally called him dad
You freeze and go to apologize but he just hugs you
And you feel tears hit your shoulder
“No it’s ok, yeah I’m your dad now kid”
When your about 10-13 he sends you to school since your properly caught up and he thinks it’s probably best you make friends
He’s already at this point gotten you a fake ID with a new last name since he knows if you have Todd then Bruce is gonna look into it
While he isn’t trying to get revenge anymore he’s still not on the best of terms with the old man
A metaphorical wall between them that leaves Bruce at a distance
Jason likes it this way though since no one knows about you
Giving you a relatively normal life
Now that your a bit older he shows you some of his favourite tv even if it’s still not the most age appropriate thing for you to watch
But as long as no one knows you can watch Buffy but shhhh
Loves binging series with you but also enjoys watching movies as well like lost boys
He’s got a soft spot for older films that will probably be transferred to you
Oh and murder mysteries like knives out (Damn you Bruce)
You don’t remember your birthday so he uses the day he found you as it
And at this age he goes 100% on them
Like guess whos gonna go see hadestown?!?
By god he loves you so much, like goes from big intimidating vigilante to gentle little shit when he gets home
Sometimes you try to stay up late to be awake when he gets home
You usually fall asleep and it always makes his heart warm and fuzzy at the sight of it
Definitely takes you around on his motorcycle and makes you your own helmet to match his
You best bet your gonna be the fucking coolest kid in school with the leather jacket he gets you
He teaches you how to defend yourself and stick up for others
And not to let people step over you
Sure he gets some calls from the office but when he hears little Tommy was being a dick he’s taking you to get Dairy Queen and a pat on the back
You also get a lot of his sass as well
Like you’ve gotten in trouble several times for being a smart ass to terrible teachers
He affectionately calls you “little shit” “ankle bitter” “kid” and “brat”
In return you tease him for having white hair and calling him “old man”
At this point he hasn’t told you about Bruce and his revival but you know he has something against Batman
And for now he leaves it at that since he would prefer to tell you when your a bit older since your still a kid
No matter what he’ll get it into your head to NEVER become a hero or vigilante
Seeing him come home battered and bruised is enough to convince you of that though
Along with that he also teaches you about picking and choosing fights and when to know that you should get help
He doesn’t show up to pta meetings at Gotham academy cause he’s kinda scare Bruce is gonna be there and have some questions
There have definitely been some times while taking you out for something that he narrowly avoided his family
Speaking of which despite them not knowing about you, you actually know about them
Jason actually entrusts you with the information that their the bat family to you since he knows you won’t tell anyone
Even if you did it would sound like a kid spouting off fun theories
You once called Nightwing a dick for a joke and he turned around all confused until he realized what you said
When you told Jason he laughed his ass off about it
Every year for Halloween he lets you borrow one of his spare masks and y’all go out for trick or treating
At the end of it you guys have a tradition of eating some of your spoils of candy on a rooftop overlooking Gotham
When you become a teenager he’s surprisingly really good at dealing with you
Partially because Jason’s still a grungy teen at heart lol
Y’all don’t really have misunderstandings since he puts effort into making some communication is key
Unlike with Bruce who he feels never tried to see his viewpoint Jason makes sure to see your one on topics and issues
But that’s the rare case you guys actually have a discussion like that
Jason actually really happy if you start dating and isn’t really bothered by it?
He knows you can handle yourself and trusts your judge of characters unless he gets reallly off vibes about them
Like serial killer kinda vibes
Then he’s stepping In
If you do have a bad break up though he’s 100% taking you to egg that persons house
And the he takes you to a nice dinner while you both shit talk or if your not feeling up to that he gets ice cream and y’all watch your favourite happy movie
Whatever career you want to pursue you can bet that he will support you
He’s your biggest cheerleader and if it came to it he’d get Pompom’s to prove a point
If you don’t know where you wanna go that’s fine as well!
He doesn’t fucking know what he’s doing with his life either lol and he certainly doesn’t have a conventional job (that’s for sure)
He’s super happy if you begin experimenting with different styles especially if it’s something kinda alt, grunge or punk
Cause then you both can match and he can give you some of his old stuff he’d think you like
At this point in your life he’d be really happy if you share some of your favourite music with him
He has a lot of range and versatility in his playlists but he isn’t as up to date with modern music as he’d like to be
He’d probably really like Doja cat, tame impala, Lovejoy, and Mitski
God if you show him Mitski expect to one day find him crying whilst listening to it
If you ask him what’s wrong he’ll just say “it’s one of those days” (Me)
Speaking of which, this is the time where Jason actually opens up about why he has nightmares so often and why he hated Bruce
It’s definitely a bit jarring to hear about him being beaten to death and then revived
And you definitely get a bit upset that Bruce didn’t do anything to really get revenge on the joker
Though you know your view is biased from being Jason’s kid and watching him growing up have full on horrific nightmares that would make him wake up screaming
How his mom betrayed him as well
It’s a big thing for him to talk about since he usually prefers to not relive those memories in his mind
But he knows that you’d learn eventually and he’d prefer if it was from his mouth
For him to tell about his trauma when he felt that both of you were ready
You feel closer to him in heart
And you hug him like when he had found you all those years ago
And Jason finds himself content
Any concert you want to go to he’s probably tagging along since he enjoys those type of events
Even if it’s for a musician that isn’t his favourite
He finds any hobby you have or anything you wanna collect
Cause he wants you to be happy and even if he doesn’t get it per say seeing your smile makes him understand
If it’s something he also likes though then be prepared cause your sharing that collection with him
And you both are gonna geek out over shit
He still reads to you as a small tradition you’ve both continued since him taking you in
Just you snuggled beside him in a cocoon of blankets as he reads a book of your recommendation aloud
A vinyl playing on a low level in the background
That alone pushes him to never give up when on patrol
He has you to return to, he has someone who he cared for more than his own life
The only bit of normality he has in his life after being thrown into the bubbling green waters of the Lazarus pit. Coming back as a broken and lost man hellbent on revenge and lingering rage
And of fucking course it’s during one of these nights as he’s reading Carmila that Bruce and Dick decide to drop by
“What the?!- Jason who the hell’s that?!?”
“Do we lie orrr?” “Can’t lie to em kid, their like living lie detectors” “those don’t even properly work though, you can cheat them easily” “it was an analogy”
“Can still hear y-“
“Shut up dick”
“They know?”
“Yeah well…of course I’d tell my kid about you guys”
“I’m an uncle?!?. How long have you had them?!?, how?!”
“How old are they?”
“I’m right here you know, Stop talking as if I’m not you geezers”
Haha yeah….Bruce is having a crisis realizing he’s technically a grandpa now
Hurray
There are like 2000 things going on in his mind right now and he definitely needs a chair to sit down on
He’s still in his costume so his emotions aren’t really showing but you can definitely tell he’s not ok by how he’s leaning against the wall looking kinda faint
He happy but at the same time he’s kinda upset that Jason never told him
Like, you’ve had a kid for years and never told me, your dad?!?
Jason definitely needs to have a talk with him and explain his side of the situation (which you practically force the two of them to do)
He’s kinda akward around you but not in a bad way, moreso in the “so kiddo what do you kids like these days” kinda way
He’s missed out on countless years of your life and didn’t even know you existed up until now and now your suddenly revealed to be his grandkid
He has like years of birthdays, Christmas’s, Easter’s and every other fucking holidays to catch up on
He starring holes into you by accident and your dad has to lightly smack his arm to tell him to stop lol
He means well though and you know that
Meanwhile Dick is ecstatic cause he’s an uncle!!
He’s already ready to brag to everyone he knows about it and be like “pshh that cool but I’m now an uncle”
Bro’s sitting beside you and asking everything about your interests and achievements
It’s kinda sweet since he’s just nodding along adding “ooh’s” and “ahh’s” every once in awhile
It reminds you a bit of a golden retriever
But with that also comes the little devil on your shoulder tempting you to mess with him a bit
And you do so
“I have the best insults from here to metropolis”
“Want to prove that?”
“Sure. I bet you have so much ass hair that when you have diarrhea it comes out as filtered water”
They quickly learn you have Jason’s mouth if not worse
Wither you or Jason realize it or not your both alike in more ways than one
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genderkoolaid · 20 days
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While some empirical research that has included suicidal people’s voices by analyzing their discourses through online forums (e.g., Lundström 2018) or interviews (Marsh, Winter and Marzano 2021) has allowed for a nuancing of the conclusion that talking about suicide necessarily increases suicidality in others, the point is not to deny the potential “contagious” effect that other suicides and discussions around suicidality could have on distressed people. As I have observed in my own life and in the lives of the suicidal people I know, learning about someone’s death by suicide and hearing about suicidality can trigger our own suicidality and sensitivity on this topic. However, I want to highlight the fact that, once again, this idea of “contagion” and imitation is strongly shaped by suicidism. As I argue in Chapter 5, if my suicide-affirmative approach were to be implemented, this potentially “contagious” effect would likely be mostly nullified, since suicidal people triggered by open discussions on suicide would seek help and support more freely. In other words, offering the possibility of assisted suicide from a suicide-affirmative approach and discussing suicidality openly would potentially have the reverse effect; more people would seek care instead of completing their suicide in isolation and silence.
— Undoing Suicidism: A Trans, Queer, Crip Approach to Rethinking (Assisted) Suicide by Alexandre Baril (p. 20)
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alornights · 11 months
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⟢ you took my soul.
➜ in which ! your beauty took their breath away.
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💌 ﹫main 4 + butters stotch.
✩ 🎸 warnings﹗none.
🍓 ⟡ notes — me when subliminals start working, tehehe. based on the jimmy & kyle pretty people drabbles i did. idk what im doing tbh.
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*ੈ✩‧₊˚ eric cartman.
hates you.
the guy was so confused about why you looked like you were glowing and why his heart was about to beat out of his chest.
death stared you the entire first week you moved to town.
he later confronts you asking if you do witchcraft. you obviously answer you don't. he thinks you're lying and got plastic surgery.
you say you didn't with like the prettiest smile he's ever seen. he takes your word for it and everyone was shocked.
since then he's been like a parasite who always seems to be stuck with you always there to shoo off anyone irrelevant.
thinks he has asthma bc every time he sees you his breath cuts short and fucking hates himself for "having" asthma.
has tried on multiple occasions to "get rid" of people who bothered you even in the slightest way.
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*ੈ✩‧₊˚ kyle broflovski.
is actually so fucking flustered around you.
when he saw you in the cafeteria walking in he couldn't take his eyes off you the entire time, even with his friends calling for him.
if you even give him the slightest hint you're into him, he will take matters into his own hands and just brag to everyone.
for funsies of course.
deffo helps you away from any unwanted eyes, help meaning may literally threaten them in the worst ways possible.
when he's around you its like he's in a daze for him, he just feels like he's on cloud nine and is living the best life ever.
suddenly becomes the most romantic person ever, not that he wasn't already. but like hella cheesy hopeless romantic.
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*ੈ✩‧₊˚ stan marsh.
the classic and boring response is a throws up. but he actually doesn't do that contrary to popular beliefs.
he faints instead!
he thought he died since he saw an angel and then his vision went black but he thought hey at least that meant hed be in heaven.
he is stunned when he wakes up in the nurse's office and sees you worried about him of all people.
is like a stuttering mess but he starts slowly but surely relaxing around you, still very nervous talking to you though.
has bragged very purposely in front of wendy that y'all are friends.
while he may not be good at romance, he does try. and by trying i mean he makes u a picnic and brings takeout.
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*ੈ✩‧₊˚ kenny mccormick.
ay, he has a heart attack because of you.
kidding. but bro does feel his heart like- stop when he sees you walking down the halls like it's some rom-com movie.
instantly starts making moves on you, no hesitation.
doesn't matter whats going on, if he has the chance, hell take it.
at one point thought you were like his actual guardian angel because he had yet to die after meeting you.
still thinks you are and worships the ground you walk on.
very much one of those "ill do anything for you" but he actually will do anything for you, like seriously. just ask.
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*ੈ✩‧₊˚ butters stotch.
surprisingly the most normal of the bunch.
treats you like a normal human being thankfully.
though he does like stutter around you a lot but that calms down and he's usually back to his normal self in like a day or two.
is very much attached to you especially since his parents have
brags so much to the guys and tells them to "suck on these nuts bitch" because you don't hang out with them, ever.
has tried, and failed, to set up a date with you two. cried himself to sleep, and repeated this process for like a week.
it did work. at his house, in front of his parents! but it was kinda fun, you surprisingly got along with them very well.
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llamagoddessofficial · 10 months
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LLAMA LLAMA LLAMA LLAMA
I cant stop thinking about skull from the forest god au…. Like, I just.
So, I live in a marshland, my town was literally built right on top of a marsh, right next to a large river. So this one hits slightly differently, cuz I love the marsh. I remember planting trees in the mud, getting rid of invasive species, and hopping from log to mud clump to stump with my friends and afterwards, every single time, we’d chat and enjoy some cookies when we were finished. It was so much fun and all I can imagine is doing that in Skulls bog. Walking around, having fun, laughing, singing at the top of my lungs, looking at the plants and trying to figure out the species, drawing them in a small notebook. Who knows, I might even bring some food to share, some fruit, maybe some cookies.
All I can imagine is just, Skull finds this little tiny human, that despite the fog, despite the horror stories, the black water, the obvious death that hangs in the air… they love the bog.
They love his bog.
I hope you don't mind that you're his spouse now.
Like... you don't understand why everyone else dislikes the bog so much. When you go in, you see all kinds of lovely things. Sunlight occasionally peeks through gaps in the fog and makes the water twinkle, illuminating it just enough for you to spot freckled tadpoles darting in and out of cover. Dragonflies perch on the saturated ground, seemingly always posing just long enough for you to draw them. Damselflies skip over your head like fairies. Frogs watch you from the muskeg, water beading on their dimpled skin, you love to just sit and listen to their choruses of croaks when the sun rises. If you stay still enough long-legged birds wade across the weeds and pick out bugs and wriggling fish with their curled beaks, ignoring you as if you were simply part of the landscape. Butterflies, seemingly eager for anything dry, often land on you with their wings wide open. Newts roam right by your feet. Occasionally you hear something big moving in the distance... a deer, maybe?
The Black Bogs are wonderful.
...
Except... if you travel through the bog with other people, though, you might start to take notice of how little wildlife you see. No birds, no frogs, no newts. Not even a dragonfly. You might notice that your friends are constantly swatting away aggressive flies, complaining about bites- you have yet to be stung by anything. You might realise the bog is so much quieter, so much darker, when you're with other people.
No sun. No sound. It's almost like... the bog is hostile to them. It's almost like it prefers when you're alone.
It's almost like the bog only wants you.
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necrobotany-bos · 2 years
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Correspondences for Death (Necrobotany)
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FLOWERS
Dandelions, ideal for connecting with certain spirits
Roses, to show your love for the deceased
Calendula, for blessings and love
Marigolds, perfect for ancestral worship
Lilies, for a sense of security and togetherness, ideal for deceased children
Orchids, for balanced emotions and adoration, ideal for deceased lovers
Daisies, also ideal for deceased lovers and lost family members
Tulips, to spread happiness
Carnations, a common funeral flower, especially in France. Used in The Netherlands to remember fallen veterans specifically
Heather, said to conjure ghosts and open portals between worlds. Can be used to heal deceased warriors, as it’s said to only grow where no blood has been shed. Heather also marks the resting places of fairies
Holly, often planted in graveyards to protect both the dead and mourners
Hyacinth, helps souls cross over the veil after death
Bluebell, used to comfort those who are mourning
Cowslip, associated with death and rebirth
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HERBS
Lavender, for peace in passing on. Used to heal the dead, aid with divination and dreams, and protect the home. 
Thyme, to give peace to those who died in violence. Use to contact both the dead and fairies
Rosemary, for remembrance
Chervil, often used in rituals for the dead
Mugwort, usually used to aid in divination and communication with the dead
Bay, usually used to aid in divination and communication with the dead
Lemon Balm, for peace and healing
Wormwood, to strengthen communication with the dead, as well as for healing and revenge
Basil, used in purification and cleansing rituals, a common symbol of sorrow in Ancient Greece. Use to aid in divination, hedgecrossing and spirit communication
Cinnamon, can amplify divination magic, and was used in the Ancient Egyptian mummification process. It’s commonly associated with spirit and deity work
Dittany of Crete, burned to manifest spirits, also valued as a symbol of love and healing
Fennel, a protective and purifying herb used to prevent spirits from entering your home
Juniper, guards against ghosts and illness, used in healing and purification spells. Juniper berries make good offerings for the dead
Mint, a popular funerary herb in Ancient Greece, also used for healing and protection during travel
Mugwort, used in spirit work
Mullein, can help one see spirits of the dead and the afterlife
Oregano, it was believed that growing oregano on graves ensured the dead were happy
Parsley, has a strong association with the dead, also has protective qualities
St John’s Wort, used in spirit work and divination
Marsh mallow (Althea), associated with death and rebirth, marsh mallow can be used in departing rituals and to honor those who have passed
Foxglove, used for contacting the dead and underworld deities
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TREES
Cypress, heavily associated with death and spirits, as well as being sacred to Hades and Persephone. Makes a good offering for the dead
Hawthorn, associated with death, and serves to drive away unfriendly spirits. Was also said to be a portal to the Otherworld and is sacred to fairies, so don’t mess with it
Hickory, associated with mourning and death
Poplar, is sacred to both Zeus and Hades, and represents death and rebirth. Often used for Samhain, ancestral rites, funerals and ceremonies involving the underworld
Willow, a common symbol of death, even being a popular ornament on gravestones. Sacred to both Hades and Hecate, as well as being associated with ghosts and spirits
Yew, represents death and rebirth, and is sacred to Hecate. Runes, Ogham sticks and Ouija boards are commonly made from Yew wood
Elder, used in death rituals and funerals
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FRUITS
Apples, a common Irish symbol for the dead
Pomegranates, to represent various Death and Underworld Deities
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INCENSE
Myrrh, commonly used in death magic to give off good energy
Frankincense, a traditional incense to offer the dead
Dragon’s Blood, burned to aid in spirit work and protection
Sandalwood, burned to support spirit work, protect a space and consecrate tools
Wormwood, develops psychic powers, carried to provide protection, and hung to ward off malicious spirits
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LIQUIDS
Water, a traditional offering for the dead, often left out for passing spirits
Wine or other alcohol
Juice, namely pomegranate or beet
Oils, such as olive oil, pomegranate oil, coconut oil, almond oil, etc. 
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OTHER
Coins
Grains, especially brown bread
Darkly-colored or Earthy-tone Candles
Foggy Weather
Marsh Water
Snow, especially snow collected from graveyards
Cleaning up graveyards
Songs and Music
Anything personal to the person you’re giving an offering to
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DEATH DEITIES
Anubis, Egyptian God of Death, Mummification and the Afterlife
Arawn, Celtic ruler of the Otherworld, Leader of the wild hunt, and God of Death and The Underworld
Baba Yaga, Slavic Goddess of Death and Rebirth
Cernunnos, Celtic God of the Wild as well as Liminality and the transition to the afterlife
Cerridwen, Welsh Goddess of the Moon, Rebirth, Transformation, Death, The Underworld and Magic
Ereshkigal, Mesopotamian Goddess of Death and the Underworld
Hades, Greek God of the Underworld
Hel, Norse Goddess of the Underworld and Death
Morana, Slavic Goddess of Winter and Death
Odin, Norse God of Wisdom, War, Poetry and Death
Osiris, Egyptian God of the Underworld, Death and Resurrection, Fertility and Agriculture
Oya, Yoruba Orisha of Weather, Death and Rebirth, Patron of the Niger river and a Psychopomp
Persephone, Greek Goddess of the Underworld
Santa Muerte, Mexican folk goddess of the Afterlife, Healing and Protection
Thanatos, Greek personification of Death
The Morrigan, Celtic Goddess of War, Magic, Death and Rebirth, Sovereignty and Fate
Veles, Slavic God of The Underworld, Earth, Water, Music, Magic, Trickery, Cattle and Wealth
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WHAT TO DO WITH OFFERINGS
Write a message on an herb or flower and burn it to “send” the offering
Leave coins, flowers and herbs on the grave
Pour liquid into the ground, or leave them out in a bowl (make sure it won’t harm the local wildlife)
Leave them out as “standing offerings” for any dead who pass by
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