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#Dissociative Identity Disorder

rin-and-jade · 3 days

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Is This (Truly) My Reflection..? : A Post on Imposter Syndrome [Master Guide]

" Did well on a test? Must be luck. They think im smart? Man, i must've tricked them because im not. My condition is bad? Well it could be even worser than this. Im struggling? Must be a minor thing, plus everyone struggles worser right..? "

If these words hits close to home, take a moment to look in the mirror. What do you notice? Maybe you fear lots of things, having horrible self-esteem, or being a perfectionist and overthinking everything?

Fear not! They're just blotches obscuring your true reflection, let's finally clean your mirror, shall we? So let's get on with the post;

How did go dusty?

Materialistically speaking, we all know that objects also need regular maintenance to keep it's best quality and lifetime,, mirrors are one of them, especially glasses because magical smudges spawns in once in a while, pretty annoying to see with when things are not clear isn't it?

I think the imposter image also clouds you the same way, it doesn't change the facts, but it does change the way you perceive them.

But, how did they spawn in your vision? It doesn't just pop out, maybe we didn't see it coming when it's small, dust and smears are more visible when they cluster together. What this means is how criticism, out-of-reach demands, and unrealistic expectations you hear most often gets accumulated, slowly obscuring you. Make sense right?

Since the things you hear the most echoes through your chamber harder than the less frequent ones, and that nobody hear's the same thing/words automatically means there are different forms of this syndrome's manifestation, i'll list them down: (bare in mind this is read in a pov of talking to oneself)

Perfectionist - "It all has to be right" You must do it perfect, everything must go smooth, if it doesn't go like how you planned you could've done better in many ways because why can't you see it coming before? That's impossible and unforgivable, there's no toleration for mistakes. Makes you look like you're not as good enough as others.

Expert - "Until then, i may be competent" There's a lot to master or learn, only then you can call yourself worthy of a title. Because the greatest ones must know everything, they don't have any weaknesses--since that's what an expert is! What are you, who learnt most things it has to give, but still missing a lot of little gaps? Once it is all flawless and understood you can call yourself that.

Natural Genius - "I am great, as long i can wing it" Everything must be an easy feat, you must be able to do things right on first try, if not, you might be no other than an average person. Geniuses are fast learning--and they can do everything right where people least expect it. Only then you can truly be smart or intelligent, wrong deductions are associated with less bright people! So if you just make one mistake out of anything, You are just the same as them, you don't have such talent!!

Lone wolf - "It's not real effort if it's intervened" A status or level means nothing if someone helps you, because thats cheating! You should start from scratch like everyone else, asking for help will equate to not being competent or worthy. You will never be able to asses your competence or abilities if it was assisted by someone else, you need to prove being worthy by doing it all yourself!

Hardest Worker - "I should perform as the best" Only if you work the most, the hardest, diligently and with no rest, is only when you can settle down and claim your achievements. What are you if you are not as special? You are nothing but a fraud if you're not the hardest working person ever, you also don't deserve to take a break until you reach to a higher level than others! You are nothing if you are not productive, or didn't achieve any amazing outcome.

Each types has its own fixations and areas where self-doubt comes around, you might even be a mix of these 5 (pick the dominant one if can), the manifestations are endless. Note that the main theme it all has are fear of being fake/inadequate and, or causing extreme doubt, one way or another.

If you need more assurance, i have prepared links for two short quizzes to figure out if you are showing signs of the imposter syndrome! They're already tested by me, so give these two a try.

How should i clean it??

Good question, but before that, i want to mention that this inner critic is a common automatic second voice where it's created in a place of potential abuse or mistreatment for many kinds of victims. Just like how you wipe your stuffs clean can go dirty in a few days despite leaving it be, this is the same. But the more you take care of your glass, the harder the specks will stick on it. That's our goal right there: Make the critics bother you less and more weak the more we deflect them.

Now to the main point, its a tough one here, because depending on what type you have, has it's own root of cause that needs to be tackled accordingly. This post is how to specifically tackle the sense of fraud in being a system, but you can apply this to any other general things the syndrome is causing you problems at.

Dear Perfectionist, here's how you can clean your mirror:

Understand that CDDs have no 'right' way of how it'll present the symptoms to you. Like, for someone to have a cold who have a sore throat for the early onset, while you're having runny nose,, does not mean you are the odd one out for not being the same as other's manifestation.

Nothing is constant, or the same, in frequency or intensity. You don't have to suffer 24/7 to finally accept you have a CDD or anything else. Just like for those with chronic pain, who doesn't experience pain for a day, does not mean they are cured of, or not having it. One minute of feeling okay still can happen to those with illnesses.

Perfectionism seeks outward assurance to fit whatever it finds 'right' or it's prime example as reference, which is the opposite of what you truly need: Acceptance. Comparison can be helpful, but oftentimes it causes counterproductive results. Your experiences are already real and it uniquely belongs to you, no amount of external validation will fill you, accept as how you are.

Dear Expert, here's how you can clean your mirror:

Having CDD means having a very covert disorder, it is not that you're a fraud for not knowing, or have proof of what caused you to be one, or know every parts and places in the innerworld, or need a perfect book filled with documentation on anything you can find. You do not need to 'master' or understand how your disorder truly works in order to feel like you have it--because guess what, you do have despite it, buddy.

You cannot rush things! Take things slow and steady, a microwaved meal may not taste good but it sure gets served in a mere minute, but gourmet are made from long and tedious work that trusts the process instead of the final result. Many systems rush to develop a better communication without fully learning what type of communication they have, like communicating with vibes instead of the stereotypical type for example.

Nobody ever figure things out by a 100%, so ease back and embrace uncertainty and the unknown. If the greatest researchers still can't make sense of how our galaxy works, then you should not be guilty or feel incompetent for not being able to figure it out, we are not perfect ofcourse, there are limitations to what we can know of our CDD.

Dear Natural Genius, here's how you can clean your mirror:

Having a disorder does not mean you immediately know what it does, will do, or how it'll turn out. Never feel bad about learning from scratch, you also don't have to get things right first try because it might be a new topic you're unfamiliar with. If you once think you have DID, but turns out to be Polyfragmented the longer you learn and research, it is a very natural thing to experience as CDD's have many similarities between each other.

You can't keep relying on being unprepared, but expect to do it perfect. It is not a negative thing to always recap, or learn it again, and whenever you do get things wrong, it is a valuable information to learn from, it's not your enemy. The lightbulb isn't invented at first try, but after hundreds and thousands of tries, and the worth still never gets devalued.

Dear Lone Wolf, here's how you can clean your mirror:

It is never cheating to ask for help, or get insight from another person. It never means you are not competent if you need some external help, rather like how you cannot see crumbs in your face until someone points it out. One can do an okay amount of progress, but if with many, it can progress even better and faster.

You must dismantle whatever makes you think of this way, things like hyper-independence are caused by a deeper root, you must delve and explore why are you only deemed worth, or feel okay, if you do everything yourself. We grow better when we surround ourselves with many other things.

Dear Hardest Worker, here's how you can clean your mirror:

healing is a journey, i understand that you want to get over with the whole CDD's symptoms and it's problems and start getting into final fusion/functional system, that the fluctuation with everyday's progress may frustrate you, but everyday doesn't have to be succeeding something or have an eureka, progress is never linear. You will still get there one day, don't fret on it too much okay?

Worries may not leave you alone fully, and just so you know, your worth or validation isn't tied with productivity. Whatever guilt or doubt you have that is causing this, i hope you can incorporate more self-compassion. For the alter with role jobs, you all deserve to have a break and have fun outside of those jobs, and rely with other parts for help. You're doing enough.

Why does it happen? Where's the takeaway?

Well, imposter syndrome relies on many biases/distortions and possible fallacies, i'll tell you some in hopes of helping you get out of its grip better than your previous attempts after learning the awful trick of theirs:

Confirmation bias: When you take a part of a fact to confirm your current image of you have, whilst downplaying contradicting and or disregarding other pov to maintain it.

Mental filter: Fixated on the negative aspects or flaws while missing out on the bigger picture or contextual information it has. Leading to false judgement of one's situation/ability.

Overgeneralization: Where a person assumes an experience from one event will apply to another different event. Or base an answer from a limited evidence or current failures. For example, interpreting a single mistake or setback as evidence that they are incompetent or unworthy, despite having a track record of success in other areas.

False consensus bias: Believing that others share the same negative opinions or doubts about oneself, even when there is little evidence to support this assumption. For example, one may believe that everyone in their workplace or academic environment is highly competent and confident, leading them to feel even more out of place and undeserving.

Fundamental attribution error: Where one underemphasize situational and environmental factors for the behavior of itself/someone else while overemphasizing dispositional or personality factors. For example, people who cut lines in traffic is a jerk, but if you cut traffic it's because there's something important. The pure opposite can be true in this specific example: Sarah receives praise from her supervisor for completing a project ahead of schedule and with excellent quality. However, instead of attributing her success to hard work, skills, and knowledge, she discounts the positive feedback by attributing the outcome to external factors. Saying "I just got lucky this time," or "My team members helped me a lot, so it wasn't all my effort." instead.

So there a hecking ton of information i put here.. But these things are very important to learn about, because the imposter syndrome is a multifaceted problem that has to be addressed in more than one angle.

I hope, everything that is written from start to end, can be used as your chemical cleaner, wiping cloth, along with your handy guide on how to take care of your mirror professionally,

Happy cleaning everyone!

- j

#did #actually did #did community #did osdd #did system #dissociative identity disorder #sysblr #plural #system stuff #jeducates #imposter syndrome

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multiplicity-positivity · 2 days

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Grounding Techniques

We often mention and recommend grounding on this blog as a way to help folks who feel dissociated, overwhelmed, anxious, dazed, blurry, or disconnected. But we don’t have a post specifically compiling grounding techniques, so we decided to make one! Here are a few things our system does to ground ourselves when we’re feeling out of it.

Breathe!

Breathe in deep through your nose for 4 seconds, filling up your chest and belly with air, then exhale through your mouth for 7 seconds. Rinse and repeat - we usually do this 4-6 times in order to gain a bit more clarity or calm down.

The following clip can also be used - feel free to save this and breathe along with it to help calm down!

(Description:) A short clip of a small line expanding into a triangle, square, pentagon, adding sides up to an octagon with the prompt “Breathe in,” then shrinking back down to a small line with the prompt “Breathe out” over a period of nine seconds (End Description.)

4-3-2-1

Try to notice and pay attention to your surroundings. List 4 things you can see, 3 things you can feel, 2 things you can hear, and 1 thing you can taste or smell. You could also do 5-4-3-2-1 for sight, touch, sound, smell, and taste!

Sharp Experiences

Pull yourself out of a spiral, bring your focus on the present, or gain some sensation if you’re dissociating with a sharp experience. Hold a piece of ice or eat a lemon slice our a sour candy. Our system carries Warhead candies to help ground ourselves with sharp experiences.

Observations

Notice all sorts of things around you - clothes, furniture, utensils, anything within reach that you can safely touch. What is the texture like? Is anything soft, rough, smooth, hard, cool, or bumpy? What does it look like? Can you name some specific colors or shapes that you see? Try to be as specific with your observations as you can.

Take a walk

Take a short walk outside or around your current space. Try to notice how your body feels as you move. Count the steps that you take. Look at everything around you, and notice how what you see and hear changes with your movement.

Centering Statements

A centering statement can be a great way to help ground yourself in the present moment in time and space. You can write your statement down beforehand and take a look at it whenever you need, filling in the gaps for your present moment and situation. The centering statement our system uses these days says:

“My name is [system member]. I am a part of the Halberd Crew. I am [age] years old. I have [physical features]. The date is [date] and the time is [time]. I am in [physical location]. If I need help, I can contact [partner system] at [phone number].”

REST

While this may work for grounding when dissociated, this strategy is more intended for calming down when overwhelmed. We’ve covered this technique in detail in a previous post, which we’ll link HERE (<- hyperlink).

This pretty much sums up the grounding techniques that various members of our system use in order to help themselves when feeling disconnected or frazzled. We hope something here can be of some use to someone out there! Remember to look after yourselves to the best of your ability, and use some of these techniques to help ground yourself if you need to in the future. Thanks so much for reading, and take care!

#grounding #grounding techniques #dissociation #blurriness #dissociative identity disorder #plurality #actually did #did osdd #not sure how to tag this - hope this is okay!

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life-of-liminality · 2 days

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Also usually happens after a flashback and blackout, so there's a fog of distressed emotions in the background from other alters

#did #did system #dissociative identity disorder #did osdd #did memes #osdd memes #osdd #osdd system #other specified dissociative disorder #system memes

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j-chineseenglishdidstuff · 2 days

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When you rise your head and "wake up" but the body never really slept, feels like you just woke up but remembers that you didn't actually sleep and remembers things happened/how you get there, but still feels like those experiences are somewhat distinct that happened like in a dream...

#did #osddid #did osdd #pdid #osdd #osdd did #dissociative identity disorder #actually did #plurality #did system

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shining-star-system · 2 days

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I’m absolutely thinking I’ll be flamed for this but it’s fine.

I don’t understand the closed cultures/closed symbols movement. I’ve never seen it be an issue outside of the internet.

Yes, there’s people that mock cultures, but closing cultures off kills then, it doesn’t do any help to people.

You don’t know someone’s fucking DNA and you don’t need to fucking ask it, it’s private information.

And closed symbols, NOT EVERY CARRD WILL BE RIGHT

I don’t understand why people see something done on Twitter and then run with it.

I’m sorry that I’m trying to connect with MY culture, that my wife can’t connect with her culture because she’s “too white passing” while she’s FUCKING ITALIAN.

I don’t understand. I never will. I don’t get it. I have never truly seen it be an issue outside of Discord servers and the internet.

And the cultures are being killed because those that are trying to be respectful or “are too white passing” are being denied the right to THEIR CULTURE.

I don’t understand.

I’m not gonna give you my goddamn DNA or life story just so a stranger on the internet can “make sure” I’m of that culture or not. Jesus Christ.

Everyone wants to practice internet safety but then want to be all up in someone’s personal life to “make sure” they can use a symbol or a name. What if that name was given to them and they’re proud about it? Eh?

I hate the internet sometimes, especially Twitter.

#did system #did #system #dissociative identity disorder #endos dni #plurality #osddid #dni endos #did osdd #anti endo #I don’t understand closed cultures and closed symbols #it’s stupid to me #I’m not going to give you my dna just so you can ‘make sure’ that I’m of that culture

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y0han · 22 hours

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System ask game!

I got bored so here’s an ask game :3 feel free to ask your own questions too these are just some basis ones!

👥 - How many alters do we have?

🔥 - What does our inner world look like?

🥀 - Did we ever experience denial of being a system?

🌬️ - How many parts view themselves as something other than human and who?

🌟 - How did alters discover their names?

🌕 - Who has the strangest name in terms of English dialect?

💥 - What do you do when you need to calm down from rapid switching or a panic attack?

💐 - Has anyone ever switched in during something they shouldn’t have? Explain.

☘️ - How does everyone communicate?

🐁 - Does everyone have different speech patterns?

🦢 - Does everyone have different handwriting to each other?

🪱 - Are any alters in relationships? If so who?

🐝 - Can you list everyone? (Exceptions are allowed for those who can’t be revealed)

🦋 - Who has been fronting most often lately and for what reasons?

🐠 - Who has the strangest source?

🐳 - Does everyone have a different music taste?

🪰 - Who likes the strangest music?

🐴 - What does a rapid switch look like for us?

🦋 - What does switching look and feel like for us?

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npd-hottakes · 2 days

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I hate when people say you need to take accountability for the things your mental disorders make you do. "Narcissists aren't bad, but they do bad things" IT'S NOT OUR FAULT WE DON'T WANNA USE UP ALL OUR ENERGY BY MASKING!!! Sometimes, NO, you CAN'T control yourself or your symptoms. It's like saying a depressed person is responsible for making themselves sad.

Escpecially when you have both did and npd, you literally cannot control your own actions half the time, and people who expect you to are ASSHOLES!!

#Npd #Did #Osdd #narcissistic personality disorder #dissociative identity disorder #Cluster b #Npd safe #Mental illness #Unpopular opinion #Hot take #Npd hot take #Mental disorder hot take #Tw abelism

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the-toybox-sys · 4 months

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reading the symptoms of autism as a now grown adult after being bullied for no explainable reason all your life

#?#did system #did osdd #dissociative identity disorder #actually autistic #autism #audhd #asd #neurodivergent #autistic #neurodiversity #autism creature

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solidwater05 · 5 months

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Apparently this needs to be said so

Forgetting things is morally neutral! Memory issues are morally neutral!

You're not a bad person if you...

forget things quickly

forget people

can't remember entire stages of your life

can't remember important things

can remember some things very well and forget other things all the time

can't remember things (or anything!) about your interests

forget to eat, sleep, go to the bathroom, etc

forget to reply to texts

remember things and immediately forget them again

can't remember birthdays, events, etc

frequently answer 'I forgot' to questions

can't retain new information

forget things you used to know

only remember things when it's too late

have vague, distorted and/or unreliable memories

depend on others to know how an event you were in played out

have other symptoms that are worsened by memory issues and vice versa

... and anything else I might have missed!

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caintooth · 4 months

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seeing people my age talk about how scared they are of memory loss, which they only associate with old age, is so surreal to see as a 24 year old who has actively experienced memory loss for a long time now

there are causes for memory loss besides dementia and alzheimer’s, i hope y’all know that. dissociative disorders, trauma, brain injuries, thyroid problems, even just stress and lack of sleep can fuck up your ability to store, process, and access memory. and that’s just a few of the many causes i can think of off the top of my head right now.

please stop treating disabled people like some scary “other” that you might become only in the distant, decades-away future. we are your age, too. you may become one of us sooner than you know. stop acting like memory loss marks the end of a life, when so many of us have so much living left to do!

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thecorvidforest · 8 months

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boy it would be nice to be able to google something related to personality disorders, psychosis, intellectual disabilities, autism, DID/OSDD, etcetera without finding majority articles that are like “how to deal with a person with X” “how to cope with your child with X” “how to spot someone faking X” “can people with X be cured?”

#corvidforest vent post #i wish ppl would stop acting like it’s some awful traumatizing burden to know us #dissociative identity disorder #did system #osdd #personality disorder #intellectual disability #psychosis #vent #vent post #tw vent

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