I know we don't talk and there's stuff we may not agree with. But I am truly sorry you've dealt with a lot of drama over fictional crap. And I'm sorry if my posts in the past ever contributed to that. Hope you have a better day.
Hey... That's all fine, don't worry! After all, it takes a lot of time and Insight to realise that Gehrman is a very gentle and respectful man and Godrick is an absolute gigachad kdkdkshdffhhgfds /lh /lh
But yeah, on a serious note. It was quite frustrating to find out the real motivation under all that... mess was something so pathetic, but at the same time this is what happens when people make engagement with media and fandoms a moral, political act. Not necessarily a problem, after all, I was the one who concluded that the way a fan judges fictional characters and other fans will very well reveal how cruel they are to real people who do something bad, or how much they will forgive based on personal sympathies. And my mad ravings about caring about female characters! I think the problem comes when a fan is so insecure that they have nothing else besides this defence of ideals through fandomry. If your only way to assert yourself is to be a good guy punishing the bad guys, and that mad raving loredigger discovers there is NO bad guy, what is left of you?
This is why it is crucial to have passion for nurturing rather than for undermining! I think if you speak like this, you've found this truth too? This is true that I don't know you very much (mutual-in-law thing), but to be honest.. you didn't poison my fandom experience at all? I tend to never be aware about discourse until someone basically calls me for help fhdhgsdgdfs Can't scout the fandom tag regularly!
But not only it actually was a quite long ago I saw a "negative" post from you, but also I've seen through the posts that my friends liked or reblogged from you that you've actually became very eager person to defend people's passion and interests! I think the post that particularly got stuck with me was when you resented seeing someone's light die after some Redditor asshole "well aktualy"'d a thing they were excited about creating (not exact wording but maybe you remember too)? Like... you are fine, man. At that point I realised that you were a good fan and in the end valued people's creativity and passion over personal preferences. That you never wanted to be THAT guy, even if your interpretation could not be further from someone else's. Coming to terms with what actually matters in fandomry is very mature and I am happy to see this attitude!
I am still glad that you messaged me about this though; I did not expect this, but thank you! I think I will continue getting involved in fictional discourse because my autistic senses cannot ignore factually incorrect takes with a clear insidious motive, and.. eh, sooner or later, I'll piss off the wrong guy again. Don't feel bad for me when it inevitably happens :p I've accepted the shortcomings when I decided to be the debate guy. Simply laughing at some gremlin starting a discourse with the girls in DMs and not stressing over it is only funny until I realise that newer fans could get misinformed right off the bat.
Something I keep seeing when I speak to others about MTMTE Megatron is basically the idea that he's going on a personal journey to become a better person, that the point isn't for him to be "redeemed" but for him to get a chance to do good and die as a person he can live with again. That MTMTE presents a unique take on this because being away from Cybertron gives Megatron a chance to be a person rather than a political figure and this is how it gives him more depth as a character. Or just generally pointing out in a narrative sense that Megatron being in MTMTE limits his story options so of course his story is going to be more focused on a personal journey than on politics of him dealing with the Decepticons/Earth/etc and that just because JRO made a choice to take that path with Megatron doesn't mean that it's inherently bad.
And I'm just, mmm like I understand all of those points and acknowledge that they all contributed to the MTMTE Megatron we got. I even think that without JRO writing Megatron we wouldn't have had his lore be as fleshed out and 3D as it ended up becoming.
(Post starts out as a sort of meta analysis or at least me giving a reasoned explanation for my interpretation of the story, ends up being petty bitching in the last 1-2 paragraphs)
I just..... I just personally don't agree with the "he's becoming a better person by getting a chance to relax and experience happiness and trust after a life of trauma" as being the best choice for his character? Because the problem is that maybe if he were a random Decepticon foot soldier that would be appropriate, but he was literally the leader of the Decepticons that made them Like That and has political/cultural/societal responsibility for why things are the way they are? To be completely frank, I don't care about him going on a personal journey for self-peace, I think that he should become a better person by helping to un-fuck all the things he actually screwed up???
Like idc about the debate of whether he can be "redeemed" or if he should've been killed/imprisoned/etc at the ending. It just comes down to the fact that for me personally, I feel that since Megatron's wrongdoings were at a social level, him "being a better person" would've been better shown by him engaging with those people who he wronged instead of just going on a frigging personal journey for his legacy and self-peace???
Especially since in other series (exRID, possibly Windblade) we literally got plots like "the neutrals hate Autobots but they hate Decepticons even more" and "the Decepticons have been taken over by Galvatron and are now invading earth 2 electric boogaloo" and "yeah the Decepticons are literally living in slums because people hate them so much and won't give them any work." It just leaves me wondering why in the hell people are like, "oh Megatron got to be happy and have a chance to be a normal person." I don't want him to be normal! I want him to repay his debts to the people he actually wronged! Like if you want to cast Megatron as a hero of the people so badly (which so many of his stans do as if he actually cared about the Cons) then how do you reconcile the fact that Megatron just fucked off and left the Decepticons to suffer on Cybertron? Including some of them attacking during his trial and getting killed and Megatron is basically like "sorry, I'm not coming with you and this isn't going to work." And then Megatron complains about "toxic Decepticon loyalty" as if he didn't literally make them that way? Like I get that MTMTE Megatron is still an asshole but if you've read something besides MTMTE and know what the Decepticons are going through, it just ends up being really grating.
I just don't see Megatron as being a particularly good hero or having a particularly fulfilling story if he's completely isolated from all the bad things he did on Cybertron/the way the Decepticons are suffering until LL#25 where it's like "ah damn I'm going to trial now, well this is what I deserve so it's fine." Why could we not have seen something like Megatron trying to deradicalize the Decepticons or change their public image so they could integrate into normal Cybertron again? They were living in SLUMS and getting gunned down by Starscream's badgeless enforcers!
The best we got was the Functionist Universe but like.... I'm sorry, but JRO inventing a whole alternate universe for Megatron to save doesn't do jack shit to save or fix the people he left behind in this one. It was especially grating to read because JRO literally wrote in someone saying "you saved billions of lives from the Functionists" as if he was trying really hard to show how good Megatron is because he saved people (and also if not for Megatron existing Cybertron would be even worse and half of your faves would be enslaved or dead, also the Functionist Council was going to genocide organics too so technically they're WORSE than Megatron since they hate organics AND want to enslave their own race).
I read Barber's, JRO's, and MScott's series concurrently using the omnibus + a release order list for phase 3, and after all that I'm kind of puzzled why the fandom seems to ardently love MTMTE Megatron and think he's so well written but then also shit on Optimus for things that he did during the same points in the story? Because, and I know this is a blazing hot take, I honestly think that Optimus makes a better hero of his story than Megatron does for his, and Optimus' personal journey combines his personal and political identities into a narrative that's a lot more gruelling and questioning of his goodness than we got for Megatron in MTMTE. Which is fucking saying something considering Megatron committed crimes against sapient species and Optimus is the guy who tried to stop him from doing that and has always been pro-equal rights for all beings. But people pretty much just cherrypick things like Optimus annexing Earth or beating up Prowl and go "he's bad" and I'm like no??? IDW OP isn't a bad person or a bad character??? It's just that unlike MTMTE Megatron he's placed in a narrative that actually suits the nature of his actions and has themes that match. To the point that IMO sometimes Barber's narrative shits on Optimus excessively or paints him mainly in the most unflattering ways.
But like. It's just funny to me because Optimus spent his entire part of the story doing things like trying to stop Earth from being invaded/colonized yet again. Grappling with his identity as Prime and dealing with the fact that people literally worship him vs. the fact that his upbringing made him see the Primacy as nothing more than a facade of authority/leadership. Having people get mad at him for prioritizing politics over friendship/relationships with other people. Even getting shit on for being a cop a decent amount so people can STFU about IDW OP being "copaganda" or "not held responsible for his actions". The problems that Optimus dealt with were personal because they had to do with his self-doubt, culpability for the war as a leader of one of the armies, distance from his soldiers, etc. But all of these are also POLITICAL struggles. Because Optimus gave up on the chance to just be a normal person having personal struggles when he chose to become a LEADER, which also means that he's held to extremely high standards that he regularly fails at in the eyes of others.
That's why, to me, MTMTE Megatron falls flat in comparison and really as a "hero" or heel-face character in general? Because he also made a decision to be a leader, and IMO once you do things like become the commander of an army and start your own galactic empire, you lose the right to prioritize your personal problems and instead are obligated by the power you've chosen to wield to focus on your POLITICAL problems. If Megatron's power, influence, and crimes are of a social-political nature, then his heel-face turn arc and ways of showing that he's a better person/helping to heal what little damage he possibly can should have been shown with actions that help on a social-political LEVEL. That's why I'm not particularly impressed with his character arc and feel as if it was overhyped by other people in this fandom: sure, the extra character depth and emotion is nice, but I'm not really going to see him as extraordinary or even particularly good when the extent of him "becoming a better person" happens entirely on a random road trip to fuck-off nowhere. Especially not when the ending of LL tried to sell me a "they lived happily ever after" ending while basically leaving the freaking MUTINY as just Rodimus going "oh it's okay you're forgiven, we're all together again" and I guess everyone was fine with Megatron and wanted to spend an eternity on a ship with him just because Getaway died.
This is why I like (the concept/themes of) exRID/OP and the way Optimus' character arc was handled a lot more. Because for Optimus, the personal and the political were as one. He was held accountable for his actions towards others and the disruptive effects they had on a social level, sometimes to a ridiculous extent (the fucking "oh Megatron is an Autobot so now that makes the Autobots colonizers" plot and that stupid colonist screaming about how Optimus is "literally fascist" my beloathed). Even his very personal issues like his relationship with Zeta were still cast in a wider lens of, yeah this is a personal struggle that Orion faced, but he was still part of a Society TM and his actions were sometimes ill-informed or harmful to others. Even if I had a lot of problems with the way Optimus' story was written by Barber (plot holes, little meaningful character interaction, forced conflicts), at least the BASELINE of it was way better than Megatron's in MTMTE. Especially since Optimus' struggle was explictly about things like struggling with responsibility and how he feels he HAS to intervene in political affairs because has to save people/make up for his past mistakes. That's something that a good leader/good person actually does, so I found Optimus to be a better hero (even if his actions weren't all "good") because he was trying to be a good person by actually getting involved with Cybertron/Earth and subjecting himself to something he hates (leadership, war) and dealing with a shitload of criticism instead of just going on a fuckin "personal journey" lksdlkfsd.
Which just makes me extra salty that people hold up MTMTE Megatron as the pinnacle of Megatrons and literally the best Transformers writing evar! while turning up their nose and ignoring or outright despising IDW Optimus. Like okay. I guess since Megatron got handled with silk gloves on while Optimus got put through the wringer of being shit on by every other person in the story, it's easier for you to pretend that Megatron is a poor uwu boy who just needs friendship and love while Optimus is literally the worst bastard to ever exist. Or maybe it's just that since Optimus' story involves him sometimes fucking up, being criticized, or making things worse, that makes him morally bad. As opposed to Megatron who disrupted a lot of other characters' stories in MTMTE, had to have an entire alternate universe invented so that he could "save lives," and got to sail off on a quantum Lost Light happily ever after, so since he's happy and the story says he saved people that means he's a good hero.
the one time my show's (not mine but yk very small fandom) tag is actually used and it's for ridicule and discourse. now that stuff will be the only stuff you can see :/
I've heard people say that it bothered them that 11 didn't really react and it seemed by then he forgot about Rose. I don't think so and here's why. To do this, I'm going to compare The Doctor with the average, everyday human (kinda like a weird AU, lol).
10 and Rose are like first love, 16 year old, childhood sweethearts. They're the star couple in high school. Every couple wants to be them. Every single girl wants him and every single guy wants her. They have the perfect relationship dynamic. Everyone is looking forward to their 20th high school reunion and the happily-ever-after marriage stories these two will tell.
Then graduation happens and they go to different universities. Sure the long distance relationship works, at first. Even when they meet up on holidays it picks up where they left off. Then another man comes into the picture and she marries him (again, weird AU). She's happy, and therefore he's happy.
But he's not. He pined for her while they were apart, annoying his friends, and then when she married someone else, he knew he had to let go. He stayed single for a short while, even tried dating, but wasn't fully ready to let her go. Because even at this point when she was mentioned, he reacted strongly to the mention of her name.
When The Doctor was ready to move on, he got a new look, a new location, a new set of friends, and in essence, a new life (11). So he put his feelings for Rose in a box and locked it up deep inside his hearts and started his life anew. That's when he met his wife, River.
River was different than Rose. And the love he felt for River was so much deeper than Rose. But time and age changed him, like it does with everyone else and though he still cares for and cherishes Rose and will always love her to some degree, he knows his love for her belongs in the past. So when he hears her name mentioned now, his reaction is more subtle, more wistful remembrance.
So when The Doctor is at the age equivalent of 21, his reaction to his first love is strong and fresh still. But closer to around 40, his first love is cherished memories. He will never forget Rose, and though his love may fade, it will never completely die.
and fuck the hate anons 😤 you’re one of the best people on this site!!! No one loves bang chan as much as you!!! you are talented, showstopping, amazing, and things just wouldn’t be the same without you!! Keep being you!! :D
I do think it's a little silly when someone says they miss a piece of media... Like,the media is right there(probably) ! Go watch that show again or play that game again, it's (probably) not gone! But then also like. I get it. I suppose the first watch or experience of something is special and like, fandom hype around stuff if it was a popular piece of media is something you wouldn't experience within the show again, but also like,,,, you're mourning something that's not dead (usually) Create fan content! Watch that thing again! Engage with old fanworks! Cause someone will appreciate it, it will also make you happy!
the thing is. while i don’t always understand dean’s references i DO talk like that inserting my own collection of references and phrases and word associations. the deancoded of it all speaking completely incomprehensibly
There's a viral video circulating from the Fort Worth Zoo, of two keepers who ended up in a habitat at the same time as a silverback gorilla. Spoiler for good news: neither the humans nor the gorilla got hurt. It's a bad situation that ended extremely well, and that's why I want to talk about it.
The audio for this video is mostly someone praying loudly, so if you need to turn the audio off to watch it, you won't miss anything relevant. If you don't want to watch it, here's the summary: it starts with a keeper running around the corner into the main exhibit, pursued by a large male gorilla. She is quickly able to get into a doorway at the back of the exhibit, but does not completely close the door because the gorilla is standing across from her, watching. He eventually moves off to the right hand side of the exhibit, where we can see a keeper is trapped in the corner at the front. She was trying to move towards the exit as he moved to the right, and she stops, standing very still behind a tree, while he stays along the far right wall. They stay like that for a minute, and then the gorilla runs to the front right corner, and the keeper is able to run to the door in the back of the exhibit and get to safety.
Let's start with basic information. Even though it's just going viral now, this video is from October of 2023. It was taken not by a guest, but by the zoo security officer responding to the situation. Hmmm, seems like he maybe should have been doing something else during that situation, instead of than taking a phone video. It's going viral now because the guy (who is no longer employed at the zoo) decided to post it on TikTok for his five minutes of fame. This guy immediately started giving all sorts of media interviews, answering questions like "why no tranquilizers" inappropriately, making memes out of his own video, generally distasteful shit.
Zoo spokesperson Avery Elander gave a public statement that "thankfully, there was no physical contact between keepers and gorilla, and all staff and animals are safe." A comment from the zoo has also indicated that the incident was due to keeper error. (As opposed to, for instance, something in the fencing breaking.) According to the guy who posted the video, a lock was left unsecured and the gorilla was able to open the door to the habitat. I don't know if I buy it, and again, this just... is probably why he doesn't have a job anymore. By sharing that detail - real or not - he places a ton of public scrutiny and blame on that keeper team. (If that's what happened, I can promise you it will have been dealt with internally.) He also was nice enough to say he wouldn't name the women in the video... but verified they're still staffers at the zoo... which means they're eminently identifiable! Excuse me while I ragequit for a second.
So there's two reasons I wanted to talk about this. The first is to make sure it is well known that this guy is purposefully and intentionally exploiting the worst day of someone's life for media attention. Their lives were in danger, and he's using it for fame. His name is in the media articles - I'm not going to share it because he doesn't deserve that attention. The second reason, though, is because this video is a masterclass on how to survive if you end up sharing space with a gorilla. Every zoo person I've spoken to or seen comment on the video is so, so impressed with how the keepers handled themselves.
The gorilla in this video is 34-year-old Elmo. All apes in AZA zoos are managed in protected contact, so keepers are supposed to be separated from them by a barrier at all times. The zookeepers were in the habitat putting out a mid-day meal when he got out. Watching the video, you can see he's not actively being aggressive towards them - he's not making threat displays or trying to approach them. Mostly, Elmo seems like he doesn't know what is going on and he's kinda freaked out about it. (This is confirmed in the zoo's press statement, too). The staff stayed calm, and importantly, watched and waited to see how he'd move and act.
The zoo did say one thing, though, that's a bit misleading. In one article, their press person I quote as saying “In general, gorillas are considered the “gentle giants” of the great ape species.” Just because this may be true in comparison to other great ape species doesn't meant gorilla aren't still incredibly dangerous. This type of messaging always worries me, because I think it leads people to misunderstand the risks of being close to megafauna. Gorilla are extremely strong animals, and their social norms/behaviors are very different from that of humans. That's why it's such a big deal any time people end up in gorilla habitats, and why sometimes in those circumstances lethal measures have to be taken to protect human life.
These keepers are incredibly lucky to be unharmed. These women stayed safe specifically because they're trained professionals who knew how to act around gorilla, they knew this particular animal well, and they'd learned the escapes from the exhibit just in case this ever happened. We should applaud them for their cool heads and quick thinking.
As for the guy who posted the video? As a colleague put it, may he always step on a Lego.
Tumblr sorta needs a 'Mute' feature in my opinion. Like what if I don't want to block this user, what if I don't want to become enemies and in some days I'd like to interact. But also most of the time seeing how they avidly encourage everyone else whereas I get the passive-aggressive 'oh yeah very uhh... interesting... (please leave me alone I don't like your art lol)' makes me want to unfollow every single fan of these characters and never draw them again.
I remember two years ago the exact same thing happened when someone liked the same character and the same ship and I swear I was the only person in the fandom they bluntly left out and could not spare a single good word for. I can't even blame this on my art being "ugly" because this type of user always aggressively praises all art styles and all levels of skill, it feels more like 'a personal thing except we never fought a single time'. And now my toxic trait of needing approval from [cool person name] is back to haunt me years later! Add the unability to "abandon" this character/ship/whatever despite wanting to after facing so much unspoken passive spite, because I am a contrarian and the best way to trap me into doing something is to try to exclude me from it. I didn't face attempts to very aggressively bully me out of the yard/class/community/etc, sometimes with physical violence included, only to let something mid like passive aggression online finally do it.
I am really stupid and naive person despite my age, but in like 5% of the cases I will still understand the hint and understand what is going on. Yet I have to pretend to be clueless even in rare situations when I know someone hates me, because since they never admitted it, quitting will be perceived as me being "paranoid". But dear goooood, it hurts sometimes. I hope that one day I will be numbed to being treated as a tumor on an otherwise healthy body of society that someone is dying to amputate- and always a person whose approval I want, of all people. Knowing that this day will come is one of the things that keep me going as both a person and a creator. Things like viruses and diseases still try their best to persist, so even if I am actually one, I should persist. It doesn't matter whether I actually rot everything around me or this is just my self-depreciating delusion upon focusing on people that mistreated me and not people that loved me. What matters is persisting, I just still feel angry that it hurts. I can't respond spite with spite or passive aggression with passive aggression, I can't do the 'smug asshole' when I become aware that someone tries to starve me until I "die". I can just fall over and cry about it like a kicked dog, despite being so old, especially when it is a person I didn't have anything against.
And really.. It is as simple as turning the internet off, so I don't see The Person and can focus on doing stuff that I like, as if they never existed and can't crash my self-esteem. It is just annoying to keep doing this, a feature to not see them unless I am in the mood would be better. Like.. blocking is not an option. Not only it implies being enemies which is not my intention, but also it will be like an "evidence" that I was "crazy". They didn't do anything, right? Well, they know what they did, but it was never verbal, so it is my fault I "imagined things", right?
Summary: while the f1 couples are slowly breaking up, fans are stressed and try to protect the last ferrari wag standing.
Type: Social Media AU! face claim is Angela Giakas
Warnings: like 4 grammar mistakes in the twitter threads
a/n: this was extremely fun to make
all translations of french come from google! english translations are in parentheses!!
masterlist
instagram
yourusername has posted
liked by selenagomez, harrystyles, charles_leclerc, and 1,591,728 others
yourusername here's two pics from my little vacation 🥰
view all 120,374 comments
welovey/n are you guys seeing all the tweets about charles and y/n?!
→ thatonebakucorner people are so funny 😭
→ pleasemarrymey/n the lightning mcqueen ones took me out
selenagomez always a beauty! 🤍
danielricciardo did you get me the wine i asked for?
→ landonorris not fair you were allowed to ask for something?!
→ yourusername yes, i got it, danny. and lando, quit whining you know i got you something too
childofdivorce is charles not with her??
→ ihavetrustissues he better be.
→ y/nismother istg those rumors better not be true
→ protectthewags if he's not, he's crying in a corner somewhere
whatacrossover not harry liking y/n's post knowing she's got a bf
→ y/nisaneed he's ready for when that crybaby messes up
→ gayforf1wags no, i think it was my turn next...
twitter
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yourusername has posted a story
twitter
instagram
charles_leclerc has posted
liked by yourusername, arthurleclerc, carlossainz55, and 2,461,537 others
charles_leclerc guys, who do you think took the damn pictures of y/n anyways? besides that as if i would ever let y/n go. mon amour, c'est toi et moi pour toujours. (my love, it's you and me forever)
view all 195,182 comments
landonorris did you see the lechair tweet?😭
→ charles_leclerc oh, fuck off
→ carlossainz55 the lightning mcqueen ones were even better
→ charles_leclerc not you too, mate...
welovey/n charles fr said "my woman" when saw the tweets about harry stealing his girl
→ oneaddiction we know harry could if he wanted to tho...
→ charlesandy/nforever as if y/n isn't as down bad for charles as he is for her
yourusername i'll love you always, mon chéri❤️ (my darling)
→ liked by charles_leclerc and 1,596
scuderiaferrari our favourite couple!
pierregasly don't let charles fool you, he was starting to sweat when the harry styles liked y/n's post...
→ charles_leclerc i know where you are right now, and i'll come after you.
yourusername has posted
liked by charles_leclerc, lilymhe, tchalamet and 1,941,979 others
yourusername thank you to everyone who was so worried about us on twitter and our insta comments. you guys are so incredibly funny, and you bet i showed that lechair guy all memes about him (he secretly loved it). charles and i are doing absolutely amazing! also here's some more pictures from our vacation together, he truly makes me the happiest, and i will forever be grateful for him❤️
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yourusername p.s i got him the new watch from my story just for vacation lol... richard mille please do not come after my bf
landonorris ew couples🤢
danielriccarido you should've let them freak out more tbh
→ liked by yourusername and 237 others
y/n'ssecretlover the fact you guys were completely okay while the hashtag "savey/nandcharles" was trending on twitter 😭
carlossainz55 charles is still staring at your pictures, so give him a second to comment...
→ f1wags not carlos exposing charles, give the man a break
→ charlesstolenwatch fr stressing him out more than xavi during a race
charles_leclerc mon amour, thank you for always sticking with me ❤️
→ yourusername 💋💋
zendaya girl, i know how twitter gets, and they're insane
So, a certain person aka: @loveanddeepspace-unluckywisher made a meme:
and enabled me to go unhinged so...
🩷LOVE AND DEEPSPACE BOYS WHEN YOU ARE SIMPING FOR THEIR TATAS🩷
I need to find better names for those man...
💅🏽Pairing: Rafayel, Xavier, Zayne and you of course!
💅🏽Tags: Crack fic, bullet formatting, Xavier once again is abused here, Rafayel once again is bullied, and Zayne is slowly spiraling into madness but your cute so 😚💅🏽💅🏽💅🏽
Under the cut cuz I don't wanna be sued for removing nobody's sanity with this 🩷
Rafayel
Ok, listen.
He's more like a fat booty guy ok?
PLS DON'T KILL ME RAFAYEL STANS LEMME COOK FIRST 😭😭😭😭
Aigh so one day you were on his studio doing absolutely nothing because SOMEONE said that they were in DANGER
Turns out the danger was that his brush fell while he was on the ladder, and he claimed that if he moved, his inspiration would leave him.
Smh can't put up with this bih with that fake yaoi bob 🙄🤨🤨
Anyway, since he was wasting your time you decide you deserved to be payed cuz ain't nobody working from free IN THIS ECONOMY 🙄🙄💅🏽💅🏽💅🏽
So when he got down the ladder surprisingly not falling on his ass
You decided to get your payment.
You: Rafa?
Rafayel: Yes? *he turns to you with that sexy ikemen smile 🙄*
You: Can I grab yo tiddies?
Rafayel: 😏... 😐... 😧
Girl like what 😭😭😭😭
He didn't know if he felt embarrassed, if he corrected you saying he doesn't have tiddies and defend his masculinity, if he sues you, or if he covers himself now feeling embarrassed for wearing his shirt open 💀
So he just look at you like 😧😳
But for some reason... he says a very shy "yes".
So you just walk towards him and palms his chest.
And if being touched like that wasn't enough you hit him with:
"Yeah, your ass is bigger than your boobs lol"
THE F YOU MEAN BY THAT 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
LET GO OF HIS MAN TIDDIES RIGHT NOW HE DIDN'T WAIT 800 YEARS FOR THIS DISRESPECT 💀💀💀💀💀
He might have cried in the shower ngl
Flat is justice/10 🫡
XAVIER
So, after you lost a bet and is forced to watch your kitchen be condemned to a horrible fate.
(Xavier is airfrying chicken nuggets)
(Rip that air fry 😔😔😔)
You decide to approach him from behind, with a fire extinguisher near your leg cuz you CANNOT DEAL WITH THE CHANCES OF LOSING YOUR APARTMENT 😭
But hey! He actually didn't explode anything within 1 minute in your kitchen
They grow up so fast 🥹
Anyway, you wrap your arms around him and he does a hum sound in delight with your hug
(HE'S SO BABY GIRL POOKIE BEAR UGHHH 😭😭😭😭🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹)
But listen...
HEAR ME OUT
Have yall seem him play claw machine??
Yall I be like:
XAVIER MY GUY ARE YOU KEEPING THOSES PLUSHIES IN YOUR BRA OR WHAT 😭😭😭
So intrusive thoughts win (you never fought against them tbf) so you know
You give a Lil squeeze ehe *bite lip emoji*
And he freezes and turns to look at you like 😟
And he says "You know I'm not a girl right?"
HE DOESN'T KNOW 😭😭😭😭
"Yeah but like you got some booba" you say
"Booba..? Booba... tea?"
😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
You just give a few squeezes more making him squirm, and leave.
He's confused, his chest is a little bit sore and.... are you praying for forgiveness?? What are you doing?
You're probably going to hell for that, but... 10/10 booba.
ZAYNE
Ok yall know Zayne right?
27 y/o, 6'1, surgeon, childhood friend yadda yadda
And he knows yall
Lemme repeat that again
HE.KNOWS.YALL.😃
So he's aware of your... odd habit of naming things with any other name besides their proper names.
Like when you called hands "holders"
Or when you you called legs "walkers"
Or when you called mouth "food hole"
Not bad? Oh it gets worse.
Like when you called buttcheeks "POOP CUTTERS"
And no you actually tried to explain why calling it that made sense 😭😭😭
No wonder you had no friends in elementary school 💀💀
... He has heard so much from you over the years that he thinks that he might need therapy or go to a sanatorium, but he's actually scared of finding you there too 💀
So he just accepted that it's the price he must pay for being born with perfect hearing.
But nah dawg...
Today you did it.
You have been sick because you got a fever, and he's been really nice taking care you 😚
And even though you blabber because of your ferver you are a lot more "normal" than you non-sick self (Das crazy 💀)
But of course, you always impress him... in a traumatic way 😃
You: Zaaaaayne
Zayne: Yes?
You: I'm dyiiiing fulfill my last wish maaaan.
Zayne: *sighs* You are not dying... But if your wish is reasonable why not.
Poor guy
He walks out of the kitchen and stands before you
You: Can I...
Zayne:... yes?
You: touch your... Chesticles?
...
HE WALKED OUT IN THAT VERY MOMENT AND DIDN'T TALK TO YOU FOR THE REST OF THE WEEK
Unfortunately, he couldn't avoid you at the hospital cuz you dumb as shit and get hurt all the time.
You paid him a lot of sweets, but now he always eyes you suspiciously when you hug him.