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#Erling Haaland
lorarri · 2 months
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꒰꒰‧₊˚𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐄𝐋𝐃𝐄𝐃 ─ 𝐄𝐇𝟗 ˚₊· ꒱꒱
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─ summary . . . ❨ you and your boyfriend protect each other so when people are hating on you he is having none of it ❩ ─ pairing . . . ❨ erling haaland x fem! mercedes! f1 driver! reader ❩ ─ genre . . . ❨ social media file ❩ ─ author note . . . ❨ so this was actually inspired by a rewquest from my old football account which I lost when I deleted it so I tried my best to replicate it so enjoy! ❩
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❨ taglist | masterlist ❩
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erling.haaland
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liked by yourinstagram lewishamilton 87,479,273 others
erling.haaland your 2023 Japanese gp winner everyone
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user dude may have lost the ballon d'or but he won with his gf
user if my man don't do this for me I don't want him
user my parents
user the only couple ever
user love how he defended his gf from those jealous ass bitches ⤷ erling.haaland call me a full time gf defender part time footballer
user Y/N really silenced ALL of her haters. love to see it.
user this is my roman empier
user WHEN WILL IT BE MEEEEEE
user if these two don't get married and have kids life will have no meaning
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luvneymar · 1 year
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princess treatment pt.3? with mbappé, richarlison, and erling haaland? :)
# PRINCESS TREATMENT 3! — footballers! (final!)
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— SUMMARY: you show off the princess treatment you get from your footballers boyfriends! (part 1) (part 2)
CONTENT: fluff, footballers being simps, light jealousy, sensual themes, just cute stuff overall!
PARINGS: earling haaland x fem!reader, richarlison x fem!reader, oliver giroud x fem!reader
NOTE: someone asked for giroud content so I combined it with this lol! any examples of this do not represent of the body type, race or ethnicity of the reader! tysm for reading! 💕
RICHARLISON DE ANDRADE — dollar bills!
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Recently you saw a trend on TikTok where girls would hold their hands out to their boyfriends, friends, brothers or literally anybody to see what they would do.
Richarlison was currently playing video games with his friends on FaceTime but fortunately you placed your camera in the room before he went in & you’ve been recording ever since.
You were holding your phone camera in your hand as discreetly as possible to not alert your boyfriend about the challenge your trying on him. “Baby? are you in here?” You peaked into his gaming room spotting him on his chair as he shouted at Neymar for something in among us.
Hearing your voice his head whipped around and he opened his arms signalling you to come over, you shuffled over giving him a hug as his head was pressed onto your stomach & hands were wrapped around your ass.
Once you both pulled away your challenge had begun as you stuck out your palm standing there with a bright smile, at first he hadn’t noticed anything as he turned back to the computer screen.
Until you were standing there for a good 30 seconds & he spun his head around to look at you quickly before looking back at the screen, he took his hand off the mouse taking your hand flipping it over to the backside of your hand & giving it a kiss.
He turned back to the screen until he realized you were still standing there; cheeky smile on your face palm still stuck out in-front of you, he chuckled as he dug through his pants pulling out his wallet.
“Richarlison? Are you still there?” Neymar called at alerting him that the new round had started.
“Yeah I’m here hold on.” He replied back as he fished through his wallet grabbing a huge stack of cashing & placing it in your hand along with his black card. “Happy?” He asked looking up at your face which was filled with surprise.
You hadn’t expected him to give you this much money let alone any at all as you assumed he’d just take your hand & place it on his private parts. You scoffed happily curling your fingers over the stack. “Definitely, but what will I even do with this much money?”
“Whatever you’d like baby, it’s all yours.” He answered turning his head back to the screen & unmuting himself on face-time. You gave him a quick kiss pulling his face towards you before walking away checking your phone to see if the footage was recorded.
You edited the video a little before posting it captioning it with: “HE’S SO SWEET 😭😭” Seconds later likes, comments & replies came flooding in about how Richarlison was the perfect boyfriend.
OLIVER GIROUD — first class!
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“You’re so excited baby have you never flown out of the country?” Oliver chuckled watching you practically fly out of the valet car that was escorting you to the airport tarmac.
Ever since you complained about how you haven’t gone on a vacation in a while that very day Oliver booked your dream vacation paying for unnecessary expenses like tour guides & other things; as-long as it made you happy he thought.
“I have! I’ve never been to the Mal Dives though.” You answered pulling his arm to get him out of the car, you both didn’t need to worry about your luggage since Oliver paid for it to be flown before-hand.
“I’m coming babe hold on, you’re gonna rip my arm off.” Oliver laughed as he stepped out of the car turning his head to look at what you were staring at all starry eyed.
“Look, it’s a private jet. Just for the two of us.” You rambled on about the jet standing in-front of you both, you were used to Oliver spending a fortune on you whether it was cars, jewellery or even 1000 roses but a whole jet was much different.
“I know, do you like it?” He asked as he placed his hands in his pockets leaning back and forth between his heels and his toes. “Are you kidding? Who wouldn’t like this.” You laughed in disbelief.
“I’m glad you like it, c’mon baby let’s board the plane before they leave without us.” Oliver took your hand into his as he directed you towards the plane, you greeted the flight attendant who was waiting for you at the entrance as she guiding you both to your seats.
Once you both were settled in your chairs chatting happily about your upcoming adventures a flight attendant had came around with a cart filled with expensive looking drinks & desserts. “Champagne or Club Soda?” She asked with a smile.
“Champagne please, babe what about you?” You turned to look at your boyfriend who was staring at the window as he unconsciously caressed your knuckles with his thumb, you squeezed your hand bringing his attention back to you.
“Hmm? Oh, I’ll have whatever your having.” He leaned into kiss you on your cheek before turning to stare out the window again continuing to stroke your knuckles, you smiled turning back to the attendant,“2 Champagnes please.”
As the flight attended walked away Oliver noticed that you had a particularly slummed look on your face, you were just jumping around in joy so seeing you down worried him.“Are you okay?”
“Yep! Just thinking of what we’re gonna do when we get there.” You sent your signature “i’m fine” smile his way continuing you tap your feet against the empty seat right in-front of you as you looked back down to face your feet.
“You look worried though.” He let go of your hand using his freed hand to pull your face towards his forcing you to face him, seeing his eyes filled with concern made you sigh before continuing, “Yeah it’s just, how much was this trip?”
His face soften hearing what you we’re concerned about, you both had fight’s about money in the past & about how Oliver spent way to much money on pointless things,“Oh, don’t worry about that baby.”
“I have too, you can’t go broke because you wanna please me. I’ll be fine with whatever you provide.” You admitted in a quiet voice turning your head to face the window across from your aisle. “With my profession I’ll go broke the day you go bald.”
“What if I go Bald tomorrow?” You wanted to laugh at his joke but it was quite hard knowing you really could go bald tomorrow & Oliver could become broke, after all nobody knows what could happen.
“You wouldn’t, what I’m trying to say is. I spend this money to make you smile, whether it’s a large purchase or small it’s for you. In this case; a private jet just for my princess.”
Hearing your boyfriend be so adamant about you spending his money & not thinking of you as a sugar baby or a gold digger relieved you greatly. Yes, you both were dating but you weren’t a mind reader, for all you know he could be planning to kill you.
“Alright then, on that note; I could get used to this. Fast.” You pushed your insecure thoughts to the side as you settled into your seat properly reclining the seat, feeling in all the luxuries to the max. He chuckled at your childishness as he wrapped his arm around your shoulder pulling you in.
“Get used to it baby, you’re stuck with me, my jet & my money forever.”
ERLING HAALAND — giant teddybear!
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“I told you not to eat so many sweets before went on the ride, no wonder you almost threw up.” Your boyfriend reminded you as he leaned over helping you walk throughout the winter carnival without collapsing.
Seeing that his good friend Jude had gone recently to the Winter Wonderland you decided it be good for the both of you to go as well, until it wasn’t. It was either Erling was too tall for some of the rides or you chickened out just looking at it.
But seeing as you were low-key being a party pooper for your boyfriend who you basically forced to come to the attraction you decided to go onto the wildest ride there was available; bad, bad idea.
Erling had bought you almost every single foot item you looked at for to long filling your stomach much faster than you’d like, by the 4th taco you ate you were ready to unbutton your pants & burst.
“It was fun wasn’t it though?” You groaned out patting the shoulder of your boyfriend signalling him to slow down as you felt as if you were going to barf, he slowed down waiting for you to gain your composure.
Seeing as you took a little longer than usual he bent down pulling your body on his back giving you a piggyback ride, you on the other hand smirked into his back tucking your legs around his waist. “All apart of my plan.” You muttered into his neck taking in his scent.
“Did you say something?” Erling asked as he begun to walk passing by multiple food-stalls that just the smell of the food made you sick, you wrapped your arms around his neck & placed your head in the crook of his collarbone.
“Nope! Nothing! Don’t worry about it baby.” You whispered into his ear closing your eyes in the process, as Erling walked past multiple stalls you closed your eyes feeling peaceful almost falling asleep till you jolted up after feeling as if you were falling.
As you opened your eyes you looked around seeing that the entrance was just a few miles away, something also caught your eye; a stand with gigantic teddy bears. “Baby?”
“Hmm?” he hummed, waiting for you to say what you needed.
“Can you win that for me before we leave?” You asked him patting his shoulder to get him to slow down so he didn’t walk right by the stand.“Win what?”
“The giant teddy bear.” You slid down his back and turned towards the stall pointing to the humongous teddy bears.
“You’re such a child, fine.” Erling walked towards the stand grabbing a few of the tennis balls on the desk as he backed away throwing them at the targets scoring on each one of them.
The man at the stall handed him a giant pink bear almost the size of you leaving Erling to walk back to you giant big bear in hand stupid grin on his face, you took the bear out of his hand giving it a big squeeze. “Thanks baby.”
“What should I name him?” You asked as you both continued to walked towards the exits hand in hand, hearing that Erling turned to you looking at you weirdly, “You name your teddy bears?”
“Of course! Since you won him for me I’ll name him, Erlie.” You smiled at him squeezing his hand, Erling chuckled at your ridiculous as he bent down to give you a kiss on your forehead.
“You’re too cute, but Erlie is a horrible nickname love. Makes him sound like an old man.”
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whorekneecentral · 4 months
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Christmas On The Farm
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Erling Haaland x Fem!Reader
Warnings: family christmases, stealing a tree, use of an axe, getting caught, soft boyfriend erling, a few cheesy moments, fingering, oral (f!receiving), overstimulation kinda, penetrative sex (p in v), nipple sucking, creampie, getting caught in a different way :)
Word Count: 2,357
Author's Note: omg it's the big mannnn, anytime I think of erling, I think of the farm so here we are lmao - also this is for pookie too sorry lmao all her bfs are in here
merry smutmas series
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Erling takes you home to spend the holidays at the Haaland Family Farm and you two end up being the only ones there. 
"Are we going the right way?" You look over at your boyfriend, the man driving through the snow.
Erling nods, "I promise I know where I'm going." He laughs, the wind shield wipers make a squeaking sound, brushing the snow away as he slowly makes his way up the road. He turns into the driveway, the snow really coming down as he parks the car.
"It's freezing!" You shouted, running up the front porch stairs to unlock the door. Erling rolls his eyes at your theatrics, getting the bags out of the car before following you into the house.
The door shuts behind him, Erling shaking the snow off of his hoodie.
The two of you had ventured up to the Haaland family farm for the holidays. His siblings and parents were supposed to meet you guys there but due to the snowstorm, their flights were canceled. They would be arriving on Christmas Eve rather than the 18th like the two of you so that left it up to you to get things ready for the holidays.
It takes the two of you an hour to defrost and get comfortable, Erling rearranging things to his liking and you were relaxing on the couch, finally glad to have your boyfriend to yourself and not have to fight for his attention during the season - though you had to give it to him, he balanced everything in his life perfectly.
"We should decorate," he announces, coming into the living room from the kitchen. You look at the man over your book, "okay, with what?"
Looking around, the house lacked Christmas spirit big time.
Before you could gather yourself, Erling's got you over his shoulder as he walks down the hallway. "I can walk, you know!" You say through the giggles, holding onto him.
He smiles, putting you down at the end of the hallway. "Where's the fun in that?"
You roll your eyes at his childish ways, letting him walk into the room first. The room was used for storage, all sorts of things packed away in boxes and containers. You flipped the switch, turning on the light as he looked around. Eventually you two found the boxes marked for Christmas - ornaments, garland, lights etc.
One by one you moved the boxes into the living room and you started on your tasks.
Erling braved the cold; something that never really bothered him - having his Norwegian blood and all - and strung the lights around the porch railing and roof.
You were working on the inside; wrapping the staircase in garland, changing the curtains to the red and green ones, hanging mistletoe, replacing the regular throw pillows for the holidays ones and things like that. Eventually Erling came back in, helping you with the rest of the tasks, a few miscellaneous things to do here and there around the house.
There was one box left, the big label on the top read ornaments.
"We need a tree," you looked over at him, your hands on your hips.
Erling smiles, "you look.. very wife like."
"Thank you, I guess," you laughed, "but we still need a tree. Do you guys have one somewhere? Did we forget it in the room?"
"You mean like.. a fake one?"
"Yeah, duh." You looked at your boyfriend, the look of confusion on his face. "We don't have one in the house but there's one outside."
"Okay where is it? In the barn or?" You trailed off, waiting for an answer.
"No, we can just cut one down." He says, tossing your hoodie to you. The sweater lands on your face and you move it, looking at the man like he was insane. "I'm sorry, we can.. what?"
"Cut the tree down. There's a few at the back of the property. It stopped snowing so we can make it and be back before it gets really dark."
You put your sweater on, looking for your coat. "Have you ever cut a tree down before?"
Erling shakes his head, putting his own coat on. "No, but it can't be that hard."
He was out the door before you could protest. You really had no choice now, did you? You followed the man to the barn, he pulled an axe out of some trunk and handed you a giant torch light. It was the blind leading the blind, the two of you trudging through the snow to find a Christmas tree.
Sometimes you really wondered what went through this man's head. Then you wondered if you were right in the head, following him through the snow in the dark to find a tree.
You find a few, settling on the biggest one you could get without it being too heavy to carry or too big for the house, and Erling started swinging the axe.
You took a step back; you trusted him but not when it came to chopping a tree down in the dark.
It reminded you of when you were a child, your father yelling at you to hold the light one way while he's doing something and you held it a different way.
So there you were, dragging a Christmas tree through the snow with your boyfriend. "Move faster," Erling says and you grumble.
"We don't all have superhuman strength, you know."
"Just hurry up, babe," he told you.
You grumble again, trying to move a little faster but between the thick snow, the heavy tree and holding the light, it was a little hard to do.
"What's the rush anyways ?"
"Well," he starts and you know that tone; something was wrong. "It's actually the neighbour's tree."
"WHAT?" you stopped, turning to face him. "WE STOLE A TREE?!"
He laughs, nodding for you to keep walking. "It's not that serious babe, just keep walking."
Sometimes you really wondered how you ended up with him as a boyfriend, but the fact that he made you an accomplice to Christmas tree theft is outweighed by how good of a boyfriend he is.
Despite all your huffing, you help him get the tree into the house in the snow off of it. It took about an hour of sorting for you two to settle on a theme for the tree; the classic red, green and gold. The ornaments hung off the branches, Erling strung the lights around the tree before finally plugging it in.
The two of you admired your work, his arms wrapped around you as he hugged you from behind, his chin resting on your head.
Your own hand rests on his, "I cannot believe you made me steal a Christmas tree."
Erling laughs, "is it really stealing though ? The tree is out in the open sooo.." He trails off, making you laugh. You turned to face him, your hands holding his jaw, "you're ridiculous."
He leans into you, kissing you softly. "'Tis the season for giving, baby."
"Yeah, sure."
"Speaking of gifts," he starts, his hands moving to rest on your lower back, pulling you flush against him. "I have one for you."
You brows furrowed, "it's the 18th, babe. You're a whole week early." Your head tilts to the side as you look at your boyfriend. The man smiles, shaking his head as he leans down to kiss you.
It clicks, you realize what his gift is.
"Oh," you giggled, the two of you shifting to the floor. "I like this kinda gift," you whisper, his lips moving to your neck.
"I knew you would," he mumbles into your skin, his cold hand slipping under your shirt. "Erling!" You shrieked, wiggling away from him.
The man smiles, "sorry."
He sits against the couch, watching as you undress in front of him. The leggings sliding down your smooth legs, pooling by your ankles before you step out of them, you pull off the sweater and that leaves you in the same blue set Erling loves so much.
You reach behind to unhook your bra but he stops you, “leave it on.” 
He pulls you by your waist back to him, his hand slipping down to rest on your ass before giving it a smack. You’re quiet, looking down at your boyfriend on the floor. 
“I like this,” he tells you, fingers rubbing over the blue lace. 
You smile, “I know.” 
He pulls you to lay on the floor, he’s sat between your legs with one on either side of him. You’ve propped yourself up on your elbows to look at him. Erling pulls the panties to the side, his eyes fixed on your pussy and he gives you no warning, pushing his fingers into you. The sound leaving your mouth was like heaven on earth to him. 
His fingers curl upwards, your back arching at the feeling. 
“Baby, please.” your hand reaches down to wrap on his wrist but he swats your hand away, managing to pull both to rest on your stomach and his free hand over your hands, pinning them to your stomach. 
You try to wiggle your hands away from him, trying to grab on something. “Behave.” He tells you, adding another finger.
You subconsciously spread your legs, giving him more room. Erling's cheek presses to your inner thigh, watching as your face twists, pleasure all across it and your hands stop wiggling, he smiles, satisfied. 
Erling can feel your eyes on him, he reaches for the blue lace you’re wrapped up in and tugs it down your legs, letting it fall to the floor with the rest of your clothes.
He shifts to lay on his stomach between your legs, leaving a trail of kisses as he works his way up to your cunt. 
Your eyes meet his, he knows you’re looking. He wants you to look at him. Your hips buck when you feel his tongue against your clit, your hand gripping on his hair. 
He knew you like the back of his hand, gripping your thighs to keep them in place as his tongue lapped your clit. Your hips buck, your way of saying you want more and Erling gives in - he always gives into you. Two fingers in you and he glances up to see your head tossed back onto the pillows, eyes fluttering shut and your free hand groping your tit. 
Between his fingers and his tongue, your orgasm was teetering on the edge; he knew that much. 
He pulls his hands away, the sticky fingers on your thighs. A whimper leaves your lips at the loss of fullness. 
“What- why’d you stop?” You asked, pouting at your boyfriend in disapproval.
Erling sits up, patting his lap. “C’mere.” 
You manage to pull yourself up, your legs feeling like jelly as you move yourself onto your boyfriend’s lap. Erling's hands resting on your lower back, fingers dancing up and down the curve of your spine. They run up once more before they stop on the clasp of your bra. 
He unhooks it, letting the straps slide down your arms and land on your lap. He brings his hands around to your stomach, once again his fingers slide up your soft skin before resting on your tits. 
“Erling,” you call, eyes fixed on him.
He hums, his focus on your tits rather than anything you had to say. Gripping his chin between your fingers, he finally looks at you. 
“Please,” you mumble, the desperation all over your face. Erling smiles, there's a look you've seen a million times over on his face.
You’re up on your knees, hovering over his lap, your hands under you as you undo his pants. Erling helps you, pulling them down enough for you to sink down onto him. Your hand rests on his shoulder, giving you a moment to gather yourself before starting to bounce on his lap.
You look at your boyfriend, watching as he kisses down your chest, over your tits before his lips wrap around your nipple, tongue lapping over it. Your hand tangles in his hair, his name falling from your lips.
Your back arches a bit, pushing into Erling. His hand moves from your hip to your other tit, fingers pinching your nipple, twisting and rolling it softly between his thumb and index finger. 
“God,” you breathe, a hand raking through Erling's blonde hair. 
You rock your hips forward and Erling's head drops back into the couch, his eyes fluttered closed.
“Fuck, you’re perfect.” His hand pats your hip, “made just for me.” He tells you, your lips on his neck -- a trail of marks and sloppy kisses being left along his neck.
Erling can feel the way you were clenching around him and he knew you were close; you knew he was close, his eyes closed and head back.
His hand reaches between the two of you, his fingers finding your clit once again. “Oh my god,” your hips bucked, his fingers matching the pace of his hips, your body rocking back and forth to get the most out of your boyfriend. 
“C’mon sweetheart, want you to cum for me.” He says, knowing it won't be long more. 
He knew you like the back of his hand, every look, every touch, every movement, he knew you.
Between the two, he pushes you over the edge. The knot in your stomach comes loose and your boyfriend watches as you cum. The wetness wrapping around his cock, and with a few sloppy thrusts, Erling follows behind you. 
The two of you are holding onto each other like the other is going to disappear, giggly and love drunk. Your boyfriend peppers kisses all over your face, your arms wrapped over his shoulders.
It wasn't until there was a knock on the door that you two froze, looking at each other. "Erling?!" The voice calls from outside.
His hand covers your mouth, your brows furrowed and eyes widen as you look at him. His lips are by your ear, "it's the neighbour."
You move his hand, whispering back to him. "The lights are on."
"Shhh, they'll go away if we're quiet."
You look at your boyfriend, lips pressed together in an attempt to muffle your laughter. He really did make you wonder sometimes.
--
taglist: @nosugarallspice  @evieepepi08 @mimithepooh @koufaxx @dannyramirezwife-simpaccount @topguncultleader @molliemoo3 @aisharmi @mamako23 @ac3may @lewislcver @miahgonzalez16  @books-and-netflix-pls  @wibi96 @bwddermilch @pedrisgatorade  @clarasenchant @sainzluvrr // @trentsfav @trentsmyfave @noturbabe22
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kraeki · 4 months
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roomies turned rivals
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taasgirl · 5 months
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planned / jude bellingham
summary: jude an y/n are aaaaall about soft launch, until a certain grealish ruins it
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jobebellingham Proud of you brother. Birmingham will always love you #bvbbound
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judebellingham Lots of love little bro 🫶
user4562829 their love for each other >>>>>>
bvb Welcome home starboy ⭐
ynusername up for some german lessons @ judebellingham
judebellingham ja bitte!
ynusername you're getting there...
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ynusername i don't wanna leave home :((((
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maddygrech please don't leave me here with the eshays
ynusername oh god. good luck
jobebellingham God when can I come over 🙄
user272937 always was always will be 🖤💛❤️
liked by ynusername
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liked by judebellingham, jobebellingham, gioreyna and more
ynusername us.
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user3452893 strangely cryptic...
user1280282 100% confirming that she's a wag
user0927652 anyone else here from that one tweet?
user5793723 HOW IS NO ONE TALKING ABOUT HOW IT SAYS 'US'?
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erlinghaaland Hearts for everyone. Thank you to everyone who came out tonight, a biiiig 3 points on the board.
ynusername sigh.
erlinghaaland fine take him back 😳 liked by judebellingham
judebellingham Germany is black and yellow!! 🖤💛
username456297 yn and jude this, yn and jude that. LETS FUCKING TALK ABOUT ERLING AND JUDE
liked by ynusername
view ynusername's story
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flowers for my pretty guy <3
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ynusername is it really a date if i'm not ordering pasta?
judebelligham idk if you're scamming me but pasta should not be $40 a dish
user563920 WHAT THE FUCK????????? user019373 TEARS DOWN MY FACE RIGHT NOW
maddygrech my pretty girl
jackgrealish i wonder who was taking these photos 💁
user65283 he's so unserious omfg
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judebellingham some photos with some of my favourite people 🩷
trentarnold66 nice to see that you've done me dirty
jobebellingham i hear you. look at my eyes smh
user672939 SOFT LAUNCH I REPEAT SOFT LAUNCH
jackgrealish i wonder how y/n is feeling now that you've finally posted her
jobebellingham JESUS JACK ITS A SOFT LAUNCH
judebellingham's post is unavailable
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judebellingham i think i'm gonna love you a long time @ynusername
ynusername @ jackgrealish we wanted the soft launch to last longer gosh
jackgrealish DON'T BLAME ME I CAN'T KEEP SECRETS
jobebellingham idk what she sees in you
judebellingham 🍆
user458274 yeah they're my parents fr
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ynusername i really wanted to drag out the soft launch but @ jackgrealish had different plans...😶
jackgrealish I DID YOU GUYS A FAVOUR STOP BASHING ME
judebellingham my beautiful girl 💗
user567822 NAWWWWW
user682629 ok they cute af
Let me know if ya'll like this ❤️ Jude and y/n got me cheesing
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ruben-dias · 1 month
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they are so dumb they own my heart
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erlingshaalands · 18 days
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no flirting during the game please
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nosugarallspice · 5 months
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could you write for Erling Haaland "I love the way you look when I'm inside you" + "cockwarming"
Hi babe, of course :))
Hope you like it<3
Minors DNI!!!
Word Count: 373
Author’s Note: This def took a turn but Erling seems like the kind of person, where cockwarming just isn’t enough for him, so I switched it up. Hope you still like it pookie.
~~
You squirmed as Erling held you in place, his hand gripping your hip tightly as he pushed his cock deep inside of you.
You tried your best to focus on your show but it was hard, especially when he was shuffling behind you to get more comfortable, the tip of his cock brushed against your g-spot causing you to whimper.
“Erling.” You whined turning your head to look at him. He smiled, placing a kiss to your temple. “Sorry love, I was getting comfortable.”
“It’s okay but when you keep moving like that, it makes me want more.” You pout, pushing back against him to create some kind of friction.
He couldn’t help but chuckle at your neediness, he could never say no to you, so he gave in. Erling grabbed your leg, tossing it over his own, this pushed him in even deeper causing you to gasp.
“Right there.” You moaned. He began to move his hips, his cock pressing against that same spot over and over.
“Fuck,” he groaned.
“I love the way you look when I’m inside you.”
You were so caught up in the moment, unable to form a sentence you nodded your head. Your hand reaching down to rub your clit as he thrusted inside of you.
He could cum just from the sight of you; but of course Erling held off, wanting this moment to last as long as it could.
“Look at me” he whispered, his hand reaching for your chin to turn your head in his direction.
Your eyes met his, your lips parted as another sound let your lips.
“You’re so pretty.” He moaned, his cock twitching at the sight of you. He meant it though, you were his pretty girl, but you looked even prettier with his cock buried deep inside you.
“Erling, baby-“ you whined, your hand moving faster against your clit. Bringing you closer to the edge.
Erling knew you were close, just by the way your cunt clenched around his cock, squeezing him. “I know baby, let go for me.” His fingers caressed your chin, “keep your eyes on me.”
His own movements started to slow down as you came, with him following along, filling you to the brim.
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stonesynumber5 · 9 months
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look at haaland tryna blend in with the girls i see you fool
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sl0wdiver · 27 days
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The Footyblr Political Matrix
Welcome to the thing that has consumed my life for the last few months. I've decided to plot every footballer and manager this site loses their shit for on a political matrix.
Not a political spectrum - I really can't be arsed to guess their left/right leanings. Instead, we have a matrix, measuring:
Political Ideation (vertical axis) - How do they see the world? Do they have good ideas or bad ideas?
and
Political Intelligence (horizontal axis) - Do they have a clue what's going on? Could they make an argument for anything?
These judgments are based on their actions both on and off the pitch.
Disclaimer
This document is the result of years of careful, thorough analysis. It is 208% accurate. If you disagree with it, cope. I have a degree in Politics. The position of your favs on here does not affect you.
A lot of women's football players are left out of this as I don't want to pit them against men. The ones that are on there are there for a good time!
Best viewed on desktop!
______________________
Edits 05/03/24: amended Bounou's description to say "Emerging Arabian figurehead"
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libraryofloveletters · 10 months
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Can’t Get Away From You
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Erling Haaland x Fem!Reader 
Warnings: a mini fight, some shouting, one mention of throwing something at someone, your boyfriend is attached to your hip and follows you like a puppy, power outages, jumpscares, some swearing, stuck in the middle of no where. 
Word Count: 2.3k
Author’s Note: okay I lied, I know I said no fics but this was in my drafts and I had the urge to finish it :) also this was a random idea that @themandaloriansdiaries​ and I came up with on ft many many nights ago
-- 
"Why do you always do this?” You shouted at the man across the room from you. 
Your boyfriend stares at you like you had gone insane and sometimes he thought you were, but tonight’s shouting was justified.
The two of you were supposed to go to your sister’s surprise birthday party but big shocker, Erling chose to stay back and kick a ball around for another 2 hours. Their training session was already done, he had no reason to stay back and yet he did. You were waiting for him so you could go together opposed to taking two cars because he kept telling you 10 more minutes and he’d be home, but you ended up being two hours late to your own sister’s party.
“I said I was sorry, didn’t I?” He looks at you and you can’t help but roll your eyes. 
“Yes, because that makes up for the fact that I was late to my sister’s party. You’d never do that to your sister, would you? And you know I would never do that to her either. I actually care to show up when I say I will.” 
“Y/n, you're overreacting. She didn’t even care that you were late.” He huffed, sitting on the couch. 
You cannot believe him; he was late, had the audacity to tell you she didn’t even care and now he can't even stand up so you can shout at him? You were sick of his shit, you needed to leave before you threw something at his head. 
The man watches as you grab your purse and phone, storming out of the front door and letting it slam shut behind you. He gets up, following you out the door.  
“Where are you going?” He shouts from the porch, you don’t answer but instead get into your car and back out of the driveway. 
You had no idea where you were going but you needed to be anywhere but there. 
You drove for what felt like hours before you finally stopped in some random parking lot off the side of the road; you had driven out of the city and into the countryside. Hunger was kicking in and you tumbled through your purse for a mint, a piece of gum or literally anything edible. Eventually giving up on the tumbling, you dumped the contents of your purse into the passenger seat and switched on the light. 
There’s a set of keys staring at you, a bright blue man city key chain hung on the bunch; the keys to the cabin. 
Shortly after you and Erling began dating, the two of you decided you needed a place to go when you wanted to be away from the city. That’s how you ended up with a cabin 3 hours outside of Manchester. 
The sky was varying shades of the black and the once viable moon was now blocked by clouds. You figured since you were closer to the cabin then you were home, you might as well spend the night there. 
Another hour and you pulled into the muddy driveway, it seemed to have rained at some point during the day. You silently thank your boyfriend in your head for putting in sensor lights, otherwise you might have just slept in the car. The yard was pitch black and the Remingtons, the couple who owned the house across from your place, were away for the summer which meant you were all alone in the middle of nowhere. 
The thought freaked you out, but not enough to make you turn back and go home. 
You shoved everything back into your purse, slinging it over your shoulder as you avoided the puddles of mud on your way to the front door. The look clicked as you turned the key and you sprinted into the cabin, shutting the door behind you. 
A hand dragged across the wall, feeling for the light switch and you pressed it, lighting up the place. You also turned on the light in the kitchen, bathroom and bedroom because you were alone.. not because you were scared or anything like that. 
The cupboards were pretty empty, anything of substance was eaten the last time you two were there because you didn’t want it to go bad. The only things were a few boxes of mashed potatoes, a can of corn and one can of sliced pineapple. 
You couldn't be bothered to cook so you pulled the pineapple can out and was about to crack it open when there was a knock on the front door. 
It was safe to say your blood ran cold. 
The Remingtons were gone, you were certain of that because they told you to check on the house when you come down if you did, which meant they weren’t there. 
No one else lived around here, and you can’t just say no one is home because you switched on every light possible. 
Setting the can down, you slowly made your way to the door. You waited to hear if there’s another knock, you peeked out the front window in hopes of catching a glimpse of whatever was outside. 
“Babe!” The voice called, startling you. “Open up!” 
You groaned, the voice belonging to none other than your boyfriend. You opened the door, unfortunately, and found your giant of a boyfriend standing there with a bag in hand.
“Are you gonna make me stand in the rain?” He asks, the hood over his head blocking the water from his face. “I figured you didn’t eat dinner, so I brought you something to eat.” He stepped into the house; he was so big, you couldn’t really stop him if you wanted too.
“When the rain stops, I want you out.” You turn to him and he smiles, nodding. 
He handed the bag over to you, the smell of Chinese food filling your surroundings. You refused to cave, holding your ground and staying mad at him. He shut the door behind him, turning the locks. 
“What the fuck man? How’d you know I was here?” You handed the bag over to him, acting like you didn’t want it. Erling shrugged, taking the bag back and going to the kitchen. 
He unpacked the boxes, setting them on the counter. “You left your location on.” 
You groaned quietly, cursing yourself for leaving it on. Erling ignores your theatrics and puts some food on a plate for you, bringing it over to you and setting it on your lap. He knew you well enough to know if he offered the plate to you, you’d refuse and you needed to eat; part of why you were so snappy with him was because you were hungry. 
He can’t help but notice how you un-tense now that he’s around; it brought a smile to his face but he didn’t dare say anything. 
Erling sat beside you, eating quietly.
“Can we play a board game?” He asked, setting the plate on the coffee table. 
“No.” 
Erling hummed, going to dig the monopoly box out from the tv stand drawer. He set up the board, all the little pieces, the cards and the dice and began playing by himself. 
You ignored the man, trying not to laugh as he screwed him over on one of the places he wanted. He rolled the dice, counting out the places he needed to move when the lights shut off. 
The sound of thunder startled out, causing you to jump slightly. 
“Babe, you okay?” He called, getting up. “Ow fuc-” he groans, probably stepping on one of the little pieces. 
“I’m fine,” you get up, walking to the kitchen to get your phone off the table. It wasn’t pitch black, you can still make your way around the house so you searched through the kitchen cupboards for some candles, anything that can give you light for the time being. 
Erling had gone quiet, you were about to turn around to see where he was but a hand on your shoulder caused you to drop your phone and let out a scream. 
“It’s just me,” he laughed and you smacked his arm. 
“What the fuck man! God, you are so- ugh.” 
You sit at the table, phone back in hand as you called the power company. They finally get to your call after an hour on hold and let you know that the power won’t be turning back on until tomorrow morning. 
The phone dropped on the table, your head tipped back as you groaned. 
Erling reaches for the candles on the top shelf and lights them, setting them on the table. He sits across from you quietly, the two of you listening to the rain until the sound stops, the last flash of lighting strikes and it goes quiet. 
He looks out the window and back at you, the soft orange glow of the candle light reflecting off of your skin. “I should head out,” he says, pulling your focus to him. 
“What?” 
“The rain.. it stopped. You said leave when it’s done raining.” He reminds you, standing up. 
“Oh.. right, yeah. Okay, go ahead.” 
Erling kisses your head when he walks past you, telling you to call him if you needed anything but you ignored him, still holding out on being upset even though you weren’t anymore. 
The door shuts, you move from your spot at the dining room table to the couch but before you could sit down, the doorbell rings again. “What?” You shouted, walking over to see what he wanted. 
He smiles at you when you open the door, pointing to the tree that’s fallen and blocked the driveway. “I’m stuck.” 
“Use that viking strength of yours and push it away.” You shut the door again and went back to the couch. 
You felt a bit bad, the guilt of him sitting out in the rain sunk in, even more so seeing that you had nothing to distract you. You pulled yourself off the couch and opened the door again, assuming you’d see his car on and him in it but it was off, the driveway was dark and the tree was still there. 
“Erling?!” You shouted in the emptiness, “where are you?!”
There’s no answer but what are you supposed to do? Stand out in the rain or maybe go looking for him in the dark? 
You shut the door, turning back around to see him sitting at the kitchen table.
“WHAT THE FUCK ERLING?!” You screamed, your heart jumping out of your body momentarily. You let out a breath, hand pressed to your chest. “How the hell did you get in here?” 
“The back door was open.” 
“Why are you lurking at the back- wait, it was unlocked?” Your brows furrowed, looking towards the back door. 
Erling nodded, “yeah, I wasn’t lurking though. I went to check if the generator would turn on.” 
“And it did?” You wrapped the blanket from the couch around yourself. 
Erling looked up at the light that’s yet to turn on. “I mean, obviously not.” 
It was freezing in the cabin, considering that the power had shut off and it was raining, it only made it colder. 
“C’mere,” Erling calls for you, his arms opened as he waits for you to come cuddle up next to him. You shook your head, waddling your way to the bedroom. Your boyfriend follows you, watching as you dropped on the bed and pulled the comforter up on top of you. 
You can feel the cold running up your spine, the cold air creeping along your skin despite the two blankets and the giant man in the room lifting the blanket wasn’t helping. 
“What are you doing?” You grumbled, not turning around. 
Erling slipped into bed next to you, pulling you flat against his chest. His body was like a heater, the man wrapping his arms around you and kissing your shoulder before fixing the blanket. 
You tried to wiggle away but he held you firmly in place. “You can stay mad but I'm not letting you freeze.” 
You let your boyfriend hold you, simply because it's cold and not because you were mad at yourself for being mad at him for no reason. At some point, the two of you must've dozed off.
-- 
The lights were what woke you up; bright white lights shining down on you from the ceiling and the fact that the curtains were still open didn't help your eyes that were now adjusting to being open again. 
There’s some heavy on you, you can’t even pull yourself up and you’re almost certain you know what it is. You look down to find your giant of a boyfriend on top of you. His arm tossed over your hip, face smooshed against your stomach as he snored quietly. 
You smiled, forgetting all about last night as you pulled the hair tie from his hair. He stirred, settling moments later when you passed your hand through his hair. Your fingers rubbed along his scalp, massaging his head. 
“Morning,” he mumbles, pressing a kiss to your stomach. He kicked the blanket off of him, “it's hot.” 
“Power turned back on.” 
He shifts, laying beside you and pulling you into his side. “I’m sorry about last night.” 
“Mhm hm, I know.” Your fingers dragged along his shirt. Erling looked down at you, “are you?”
“Am I what?”
“Sorry,” he says, like it's obvious. 
“No,” you joked, smiling at him. Erling knows you were, you don’t really do emotions or say sorry but he knows you are. 
He laughs, kissing your forehead.“Shall we go get breakfast?” 
You groan, burying your face in his side. “We have to take two cars.” “Oh and move the tree.” He reminds you, making you groan again. 
--- 
taglist: @thesnailus @alwaysclassyeagle​ @kylianswag​
add yourself to the taglist! 
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damiansgoodgirll · 8 months
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erling haaland giving reader a neck massage and him getting turned on when she moans , it doesn’t have to be a smut hahaha
erling haaland x reader
tw : implied smut but not really
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stress reliever
“come here baby” your boyfriend erling called you.
“i can’t” you were currently laying on the floor, full of books and notes to study as you had your last exam in a couple of days. but you felt like your head was going to explode and you couldn’t take more reading but you knew you had to go through it.
“i’m serious baby, come here or i’m gonna get you in one way or another” erling said. he was laying on the bed scrolling through instagram but he definitely saw how tired and desperate you were and he knew he had to do something.
“okay…” you knew a 10 minutes break was more than needed so you gave up and laid next to erling.
it was nice finally lay on something warm and comfortable that wasn’t the bedroom floor.
“turn around…” erling said as he positioned himself between your legs.
“i’m not in the mood” you said. sex was the last thing on your mind.
“i know, i just want to help you relax a little” he didn’t even think about sex. he just saw how stresses you were that he wanted to help you release the tension a little.
his hands went to move your hair out of your neck and he gently lifted your t-shirt up. his movements were delicate and soft. he gently kissed your neck and your shoulders and he went to unclap your bra too.
“take a deep breath and relax for me baby, you’re too tense” he said as his hands began to work on your neck. he was massaging it, going between soft rubs and kisses. then his hands moved over your shoulders and he felt how rigid you were “take deep breaths baby” and you did as he told.
his hands gently worked on your shoulders and you couldn’t help but let out some soft whimpers. if someone had to ask you, this was much better than sex.
“you like this?” he asked amused by your reaction.
you simply nodded.
his hands went on your back and he found your soft spot because you moaned a little. you didn’t mean to but you were feeling to good. and he knew he had to work mainly on that spot.
so he massaged and gently stroked it, scratched it and rubbed it.
you moaned again and again and again.
there was nothing sexual in it but you were feeling too good.
erling was hard. he got hard by simply listening to you moaning.
“erling…” you called him.
“yes baby?”
“i can feel your dick in my ass” you laughed.
“shit…” he said and you couldn’t help laughing more. he was so hard it was almost painful but you were his first thought so he pretended he was fine and continued working on your shoulders and back.
eventually your moans stopped as you were falling asleep.
you felt erling moving from your body but you didn’t want him to leave.
“where are you going?” you asked as he carefully lifted a warm blanket over your body.
“uhm…im going to take care of this…” he said giving you a soft kiss on the lips and leaving for the bathroom.
with that embarrassing and funny imagine in your head you fell asleep, comforted by the warm blanket and erling’s perfume that was all over the bed.
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fallinforerling · 10 months
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imagine smut with Erling after him winning the champions league 🤭 (also love your writing it’s the best🫶🏻)
the winner - eh
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warnings: +18, p in v, unprotected sex.
A/N: !!!! omg you guys, i feel so filthy after this. enjoy my erling girlies! this is for YOU. love you xx
ೃ⁀➷ erling’s masterlist  ೃ⁀➷ erling’s taglist
: ̗̀➛ REQUESTS ARE OPEN ! 
 ೃ⁀➷ masterlist
─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆
It was hypnotizing. The vision of the shining gold of his medal dangling with every move you made, making it slightly sparkle when it caught the little light that came from the nightstand; it all reflected on your bare skin. He didn’t know if it was his own ego or the fact that the whole situation was his top fantasy come true, but seeing the Champions League medal hanging between your boobs was the best view he remembered ever seeing. 
His hands brushed against your hips, helping you lift yourself from his thigh just enough. A moan escaped your lips, making him smirk while his eyes were still fixated on your chest. He thought the baby blue lingerie was a nice touch, so he ran his fingertips along the delicate details, daring to stretch it just enough to make room for his fingers to explore. He looked up to you, adoring the way your skin blushed for the effort of riding his thigh, making your hair a bit damp around the temples and your breathing unsteady. 
“Are you tired, baby?” He asked in a hushed tone, using his free hand to make you closer to his chest, needing to feel you in every way possible. You didn’t speak up, you just stared at him with doe eyes, nodding as your nails scratched his shoulders. “Don’t worry, let me do it.” 
He grabbed you by the waist, effortlessly switching positions. You landed on the mattress, holding onto him, the medal still in place as he discarded your bra, finally being free to suck, kiss, and bite as he pleased. Your voice was low as you whispered his name, running one hand through his hair, hooking your left leg around his waist to make him closer. He smiled against your skin, leaving a last mark before taking the leg that was wrapped around him, massaging your calf before running his fingers through the skin until he found your ankle, knowing exactly what was tattooed on your skin.
While he held you in place, his fingers made their way to your core, moaning when he realized how wet you were. The material of your thong, which neither of you made the effort to take off, was damp and sticking to your skin. As he moved the fabric to one side, his fingers caressed you lazily, wanting to make you a bit eager. After a few seconds, you started to move below him. 
“Please.” He heard you whisper. “Hurry up.” 
“Don’t be so impatient.” He loved to tease you until you became really loud. That’s how he liked you.  
Before you got to say anything else, he started to finger you, introducing one finger at a time until you were squirming under him, rocking your hips against his hand, and letting out shaky breaths that brushed his neck. You looked beautiful, all breathless and drunk on the pleasure he was giving you. He could hear the sweet nonsense your lips were pouring as he moved his hand faster, wanting to take you to the edge. The feeling of your nails dragging themselves along his arms was just the right amount of painful, and when you looked at him again, he knew you were close to cumming. That’s when he stopped, hearing a loud groan that stole a smile from his lips. 
“Please, please, please, please…” You started to beg, your chest going up and down so fast that the medal caught glimpses of light again, sending golden sparks everywhere. 
“What do you want, mmh?” He knew you were getting impatient, but he couldn’t help but tease you this much. Your eyes were fixated on him, your free hand roaming on his chest. His own hand went inside his boxers, letting himself free while he kept looking at how plump your lips were and how your eyes were glistening. He stroked himself for a few seconds, getting off solely on how eager you were. “You want this?” He asked, dragging the tip of his cock along your core.
You nodded, seeming unable to find the right words. It was alright; he wasn’t going to push it too much. Instead, he teased your clit one more time before getting inside of you painfully slow. You seemed to gasp for air, and he surely wasn’t having an easy time controlling his own breathing, but as soon as he was fully in, you drew out a long moan that sent shivers down his spine. His arms finally gave in, so he buried his elbows next to each side of your face, getting closer for a kiss as he started to move. 
“Fucking hell…” He cursed as your hand brushed his neck, your mouth letting out a whimper that made him almost cum right there. You murmured words that made no sense, but they made him reach for your shoulder, slightly biting it while his thrusts became erratic. His mind went a bit foggy, only able to think about how good you felt. The sound of skin against skin was driving him crazy, and just as he felt your hands on his jaw, he dared to retrieve his face from the crook of your neck. 
“Erling…” You whispered, looking straight into his eyes, seeming as out of your mind as he felt. You were begging for something. 
And he knew exactly what you wanted. Without stopping, he reached for the leg that was still wrapped around his waist, bringing it as close as possible to his shoulder, catching a glimpse of the little 9 inked on your skin. Seeing his mark on you always had an effect. He made sure to properly fuck you from this new angle, knowing now that he was deep inside of you. 
“Just like that! Yesyesyesyesyes–” Your voice was a low whisper next to his ear, sending him into a frenzy that made his thrusts nowhere near organized. He just wanted to keep going until there was nothing left from either of you. His thumb started to draw circles around your clit, wanting to cum with you. From the sounds you were making, it wasn’t going to take too long. “I’m gonna.. Ohmygod.” 
He felt you clenching around him, and then it was over. He nearly saw stars behind his closed eyes, letting out a long moan while he buried himself in you one last time. You were still holding him close as you both breathed erratically, the force of your orgasms still present. You stayed there for a good five minutes until he realized he was nearly crushing you under his weight. 
“Sorry, baby.” He said, launching himself next to you. You looked at him with sleepy eyes, smiling the only way you did after cumming. He loved that expression on your face. 
“‘S okay.” You replied, turning around so you could rest your head on his shoulder. 
“Wanna sleep?” You nodded instantly, holding onto his arm for dear life. “Gotta clean you up before. It’s a mess.” He knew he had made a mess. When you didn’t make any attempt to move, he smiled. You were such a baby. 
He leaned closer to kiss your lips before getting up from bed, walking straight into the bathroom for a couple of fresh towels. The aftercare was probably one of his favorite parts about it all; taking care of you during and after sex was a luxury that he prided himself on having. When he came back in, you were still half-asleep, murmuring something about wanting to cuddle. 
“In a second, babe.” He said, taking a damp towel to clean your legs and between your thighs. You made a low sound, and once he finished, he took your ankles to move you around, since you seemed to have no energy to do so. His eyes fixed on your tattoo again, his thumb caressing it as he sat down next to you. 
God, he was so lucky. 
“Come, cuddle with me…” You whispered again, waking up for the third time. You did grabby hands at him until he laid next to you, covering your body with his warmth until both fell asleep rather quickly. 
What a way to celebrate.
˚ ༘♡ ⋆。˚*ੈ✩‧₊˚⋆·˚ ༘ * ERLING’S TAGLIST
@questionable-behaviour | @koufaxx | @xjval | @nikki01234 | @evarasworld | @kynykyny | @alleyahah | @444pantheress | @football4life9 | @f1lover55 | @frankcastleonlyfans | @ironmaiden1313 | @pizzapie349 | @may-machin
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kraeki · 18 days
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Part 1
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kalembappe · 8 months
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do with that what you will | j.b. 5 (feat. e.h. 9)
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a/n: remember when I wrote? back in June? Time flies. Also hi anon who req'd this forever ago, title's yours. also proofread! but don't hold it against me, english is a hard language. wordcount: 4501 nsfw under cut! minors dni 18+...pwp(very little plot), choking, oral(m receiving), public(?), unprotected p in v sex, overusing of italics
You were moody today. He could tell by the way you avoided his eyes to how you’d only talk when acknowledged (by someone else) but not before plastering that scrunched smile that only he could tell was fake. It’s not like your reasons are invalid, if anything he was the one to blame for this but he doesn’t have time for your petty squabbling, you’re in public and you’re both adults. You know well enough that you should act like it.
At least that’s what he thought until he saw his old friend, the one that just completely bodied his team 14 hours prior to tonight is now standing next to his girlfriend, you’re talking with that pretty smile that was the death of him, easily would be the death of anyone else.
He looks like a lamppost, he observes the man dressed in all black; a complete contrast to his bright platinum hair slicked into its normal bun.
You looked more at ease now that you were talking to him, you both did. Compared to your stiffness to other people, you seem to warm up to him. You were so comfortable that you even let him stand by you with your arm pressed against his broader one.
Not as broad as mine, but you know I– Again, he catches himself. He should stop. That’s his friend too. The interaction unfolds, what should be friendly, is anything but to him. To him. He should look away, but he can’t.
This isn’t supposed to bother him. It wouldn’t bother him as much as it does if he didn’t know that Erling used to pine for you. Grovel at your feet even. He remembers that boyish grin he makes every time you would interview them post game or before. People would point it out online, saying things such as you favor the Dortmund players or that you’re so critical but praise Erling like he was god and even thought it was funny at first knowing he himself made you see god.
It’s unfair that he suddenly wanted to show Erling his place, he isn’t even sure if he knows that you and Jude were a thing at all and maybe only now had he suddenly found the confidence in himself to finally talk to you; but that was never a priority in his brain when he boils catching sight of a hand that isn’t his resting on your back.
Jude set the shot glass down a little louder than normally, clinking against the marble of the table. He picks up another one, it’s his third…or fourth. Actually, He isn’t sure, he lost count and he doesn’t leave his place. He doesn’t move when Erling’s pinky taps on your back, his patience runs thinner by every inch that finger dips lower than where it’s welcome.
The only thing that breaks Jude from his reverie is when he catches your eye as you turn back for the shortest moment, droopy and paired with a lazy smirk. He didn’t care much until he realized what it implied; you’re tipsy, not enough to be too vulnerable, but enough to let yourself be reckless to do something you shouldn’t. You wink, solidifying his conclusion–you know what you’re doing.
Before he knows it, you’re back to entertaining his “friend” only this time you’re a lot more confident, talking louder, smiling wider, even grabbing his bicep as you slightly tilt your head back from laughing. It irks him, but he’ll play your game. He wonders if Erling knows he’s playing too. *
You’ve been avoiding him all night. Even at home– his home you mean (where you luckily had some appropriate clothes), dodging kisses and pretending like you don’t feel his stare at the back of your head just like he was doing now; seconds before Erling asks you to go dancing. A bit of a surprise since you thought he only approached you to ask where the toilet was and now you’re dancing? He had to lean down to your height to be audible over the music. The question hangs in the air–Should you? Probably not.
“Sure.” It comes out before you realize, but the acknowledgement in his face tells you that you indeed said it out loud.
You have to stop yourself from turning back too fast when you feel Erling’s palm rest lowly on your back, he says something you don’t listen to– he’s getting himself another drink(looking back, his intentions were obvious if he started drinking right after he asked where the restroom was). His attention shifted long enough for you to finally steal a glance at Jude, who’s shot glass threatened to crack between his fingers. He liked to pretend it was Erling’s pinky, grip tightening as he watches it brushes on your back. His stare follows as you take the initiative of walking Erling to where the people are drunk and dancing.
From anyone’s point of view, it seems like the next story on Hello! Magazine, awaits Erling, but contrary to how it appears, your mind was occupied completely and utterly of Jude. How much you hated him, how he looks like sitting with his legs spread, wondering how far you could press till he cracks. It’s all fair play though, he out of anyone should know.
He promised himself that after the game, you would get to hangout. You were excited, you thought maybe you’d go out for dinner, do something intimate; just the two of you, but after a day’s rest (that you so generously granted him) he says he needs to attend a party, for old time’s sake.
You didn’t know how to react at first, should you be mad? You started to feel so, but thought to yourself; do you even have the right to? You shook that thought off your head. Of course you did! You let your insecurities go before settling on disappointment. Jude saw this, thought it’d be better if you spent what could’ve been your date together at the party. With his friends. Might as well bring his mum, she’s better company anyways.
Call it what you want, maybe It’s a bit childish how you hated the thought of sharing Jude to anyone, a bit possessive; but it’s hard having to arrive at a party together only to split up and socialize with other people so you can keep things hush, water down suspicion. You understand why he does it, you think it’s best too. But just for tonight, you hoped; you didn’t have to share him with the world. Alas, another day goes where you have to. Anyway, if he liked to do it so much then he shouldn’t mind if you share a little too.
The music changes once your heels click on the dance floor, the song’s slower. Erling’s stills, “I’m not good at this” Hands hover over your body, he didn’t know where to place them. He’s antsy, it’s cute–you won’t deny that; the drinks wear off when you’re nervous. Suddenly he’s aware that you’re dancing with him. You feel a little bad knowing you’re using him, regardless, he’s still a nice guy. Always thought he was a little sweet. Your eyes crinkle as you smile, watching him blush. Confidently, you push down the hands onto your hips before adding a firm pat to reassure him. “Keep it there.” You sound more serious then you’re supposed to, it makes Erling gulp. All his confidence may have just been the alcohol talking, and if he were being honest, he wished he drank a bit more.
Jude watched as you giggled–he scowled, you’ll have nothing to laugh about if you keep this up. If he was jealous when Erling put a hand on your back, he was livid when he watched you laugh with Erling, like you’re actually enjoying yourself. He’s not one to be insecure, he’d never even entertained the thought but that seemed to change when this jealousy turned into something worse. He couldn’t put it into words. It boils in him as your hips sway, you’re too close to each other, but he’s rooted where he stood. He’s mesmerized and enraged, but he won’t go down without a fight.
Minutes pass and Jude finds himself seated next to his friends, he figured he needed to let loose, maybe people were getting suspicious with how he’d only kept his attention to that girl dancing with Erling Haaland. Gio yells over the music, “did you order this?” his eyes shift to his friend, confusion replacing Jude’s then blank face. He almost said no before catching a group of girls giggling to themselves. Just as Gio was about to return them back, Jude tapped his shoulder, “I’ll be back.” He didn’t wait for a reply, already trekking his way to his next mission.
Erling’s let’s his limbs set loose, even if he’s just jumping to the music, you’re jumping with him. It’s dark, but it was lit enough that he could make out the shape of your jaw and the curves of your body, he doesn’t know why he hasn’t noticed but it drew him in even more. He spins you, back resting on his front, hands are on your hips as you sway to the rhythm. For the first time tonight, Jude was the last thing on your mind.
But from where you stood, you felt eyes on you; consciously, you opened yours only to get a glimpse of something that made your blood cold. Hands were on him. Everywhere. He’s got his arms out with two girls wrapped on him like he was a tree. The music tunes out, the hands on your body disappear, and it’s red. You see red. It makes your fingers twitch. He catches your eye, how your movements slow until your whole body’s rigid, and thought to himself; I’ve won. He grins, satisfied with your reaction. But if anything, you’re the stubborn one in this relationship.
Erling’s voice is soft on your ear, polite as he is. “Are you okay?” You don’t look his way, you’re busy making sure Jude’s watching. You trail your eyes back to Erling with a smile that fooled anyone.
He’s upside down from your point of view, the outline of his jaw more prominent under the shadow. The stare you give makes his cheeks hot. He’s about to say something but the words get caught in his throat when the feeling of your hips grinding back at him registers in his brain. He short circuits, forgetting every word he’s known.
Jude’s smirk leaves as soon as it arrives, dropping and taken over by his wide eyes–ironically mirroring Erling’s expression who’s grip lands on your hips for leverage. Your eyes look blown under the light, big and innocent like you don’t know what you’re doing–but Erling knows, they both know you do. You’re close to his face, enough that he could see the remnants of gloss on your lips.
It happened quickly, someone spilled liquid on you, mostly your shoes but also a little on your dress. It’s beer. You look up, both of you pulled away. Maybe you should’ve cared that you ruined it, the shoes that Jude bought you. Jude. Fuck. You look up, he’s already leaving sans the two girls he had all over him. Maybe you overdid it this time. Taking a quick glance at Erling, he’s occupied with the person apologizing to him, reassuring the man. He’ll be fine on his own, you think to yourself. When Erling picks his head up, you’re already gone.
You follow him amidst the sea of sweaty drunk people, shoving, and pushing. You think of what you want to say, apologize? That’s completely unfair. It’s not like you were gonna actually lean in and he shouldn’t have ditched you in the first place or canceled last second– And where does he think he’s going?
You curse this world for giving him long legs, walking two steps at a time. Everything just decides to be an inconvenience to you today. Your voice is dry with alcohol and the lack of use, but still you yell over the unnecessarily loud club music.
“Jude! Can you please– slow down! Asshole...” You say the last part in a normal tone only to realize you’ve said it loud enough for him to hear. There’s a cold breeze on your shoulders that tells you you’re at the exit, the door’s open and it’s quiet. Jude turns slowly, a more than displeased expression on his face.
“Me? I’m the asshole?” He scoffed.
“Yes. You ditched me!”
“And you seemed to find great company.”
A scowl disturbs your features, “You were doing the same thing!”
Before he responds, he pauses, Jude does something you both have been avoiding all night. He takes a deep breath, recollecting himself. His voice is steady, “Look, I can tell you’re upset about tonight,”
“Wonder what gave that away–”
“Let me finish.” You cross your arms on your chest, mumbling to yourself. Jude takes a step in your direction, enclosing your figure on the wall but (as much as you’d hate to admit) it isn’t suffocating, he’s warm and the scent of his clothes are comforting. His fingers stroke your arm up and down till they reach the space between your neck and your shoulder. They linger for a moment before softly brushing the hair clinging to your skin.
“I know why you’re mad, okay? I get it baby.” You sigh when his head ducked to your height. His voice is so soft on your ear that you can’t help but sink into the wall, his body pressing flush on yours. Lips graze the shell of your ear, leaving a soft peck on the sensitive skin. Jude… dazed, you whine his name. “I know you can’t help it..” He continued, “I know you can’t because,” fingers stroke your throat. “Well ‘cause you’re a whore.”
As soon as your eyes open, there’s a grip that tightens at the sides of your throat, squeezing out a strangled noise from you. A whimper or a moan, You aren’t sure anymore. There’s a pause in the air, he waits for you to say something. You don’t–no, you can’t. The damp spot on your underwear strengthens his claim. Heat rushes to your cheeks, you want to tell him off at least, leave a snarky remark but embarrassment floods in your stomach and his hold on you is immovable. His eyes speak for himself, Look at me–it read, but you never had the strength to look away in the first place.
“You think I’m gonna let you off easy? You’re used to that aren’t you. ‘Cause I spoil you too much, isn’t that right?” His tone is sweet, his hand brushes your temple gently, but it isn’t real–the only thing you could register with a lack of air in your brain. Your body shudders when the stroke of his hand travels lower, the one on your neck slacking but he still keeps you between him and the wall. So close that you could feel his breath on your cheek, his knee taking place between your legs and pressing slowly, you gasp.
“Jude not– here.” You curse at yourself. It was supposed to come out firmly, a command, rather it sounded like a meek plea. Jude’s leg bumped against your clothed front like he was playing with you, your thighs tried to shut but it only made things worse. “Please we’re in public–” He paused his movement before scoffing at your words.
“Really? You didn’t seem to mind while you were fucking around with Erling. ‘In public’, for someone in the media, you could lie better than that.” You wince when you recall the events earlier tonight and how he spat your name out in disgust. “Maybe I should just keep you on a short leash so you don’t hump on people like a bitch.” The words are shameless, and the lack of a better term, fucking vile that it makes you squirm. You look down, unable to meet his eyes.
“Why are you so bothered? Thought you liked this...? So open for everyone to see…” His hands massage low on your back, reclaiming what’s his. Jude’s tone was frustratingly cocky that you almost rolled your eyes if his knee didn’t come up and down again to get your attention, a surprised whimper escaped from you. “Hey, Don’t cry for me yet, I’ve barely started.”
Your hands press flatly on his chest, “Jude, can we just– let’s do it somewhere more private.” You do your best to coax the man with eyes he normally can’t just say no to, thinking that seemed to soften him just a little.
He takes a step back, enough that you can breathe your own air, albeit keeping you from sinking to your knees with his hands on your waist. He sighed, “You’re right.” *
Tears prick the corners of your eyes, the mascara that you meticulously applied earlier although waterproof is probably running down your cheeks. Drool gathers around your lips, he thumbs under your jaws; a reminder to keep it slack. Jude’s torturously slow with his movements, making sure that you take all of him. You do your best to do the complete opposite and take him in eagerly, the head of his cock reaching the back of your throat causing both of you to moan. Jude, having none of it, sinks deeper in response, causing you to flinch your head back in a fit of coughs. He wipes your swollen lips of the liquid that gathered with a dumb grin on his stupid face, enjoying the sight of you on your knees.
You swallow back spit to clear your throat, holding onto his thigh so the strain on your knees wouldn’t hurt as much. Catching your breath, you glare at him, “Dick.”
He flashes a smile, “Yes, what did you think it was?” He looked completely unserious, relaxed even, bringing down one of his hands to his side. He tucks your chin between his fingers, “Come on, angel. The faster you get me off, the faster it is for you to get up off your knees.” Lightly, he slaps the head of his cock on your cheek. The pout you make is endearing, a glimpse of your usual adorable self that he’d nearly ruined by slotting himself between your lips. “Unless…you want to keep at it till someone walks in and sees the Fox sports journalist giving head to a Dortmund player? I can already see the tabloids– fuck.”
The sound is enough encouragement, Jude’s cock twitches as he watches you (all he ever does) your pink tongue licks a stripe up his length before you suckle on the tip, cheeks hollowing, sealed tight, taking your time. Your answer is clear, Jude doesn’t know whether to celebrate or crumble. His grunts are short and restricted, yet they echo in the wide restroom that you were dragged to on a whim, how you got here happened in flashes of red lights that disappeared when you heard the door shut, unsure if he locked it–you know you didn’t but it adds to the thrill, the thought makes your stomach swirl and your knees shut.
You’re kind enough to sink your mouth deep till you're half way. Slowly, you pick up the pace. The rise and fall of his chest accelerate, gasps turn into moans. His hips meet yours, although his movements were careful, he was desperate. It didn’t help his resolve when your eyes fluttered at him, all pretty even with you gagging on his dick. His hands absentmindedly found their way to the back of your hair, finally letting himself yield and start fucking your throat. You try your best to catch up even if you’re no longer moving in your own accord and just making sure to breathe through your nose. Just as his moans turn ragged, he pulls you off, leaving you gasping for air. He lends you a minute, tilting your chin up at him to meet his eye.
“All good?” he waits for you to nod–you do, still trying to breathe. He strokes your lips with his thumb, wiping it dry. You look up at him, eyes hazy and blown. “Get up.” He commands, tone stripped of all its grit. You’re a beat too slow that Jude forces you up your shaky knees himself. You have to hold onto him and lean into his body. He’s just as wobbly but he tries his best to be steady for you both.
You’re close enough that he could steal a chaste kiss. What was an intimate exchange turned greedy. You’re on your tiptoes to reach him, but you’re not close enough, urging him to lean to your height, his palm traveling from your spine to the back of your head. He needs to feel your body and engrain the scent of your perfume on his. He flips you over, back now on the wall, hands greedy on your skin like he doesn’t know where to with your body. You nibble on his bottom lip a tad too hard that it makes him hiss. You kiss it better, sweet for a moment before swiping your tongue across it. He takes the hint and deepens the kiss and slips his tongue in exchange. You part, he leaves a peck on your forehead, drawing his lips to your cheek then to your neck
You’re getting impatient. Your body’s a lot more fidgety, writhing with every press into you. “Jude can you- I want-”
“Be quiet.” His tone was cold, still he kisses you dumb, he has the lips for it. It’s physical and intangible. He draws you in and lures your soul out, it makes your knees weak and turns you breathless. Your arms settle on his shoulders–they’re taught and big, your clothed cunt brushes against his dick—it makes you dizzy, sinking further into the wall.
He shifts your leg up on his hip, the other following naturally. You breathe heavily, his hands are impetuous on your body while he hikes up your dress roughly, settling for the fabric to hug your ribs. He pushes the flimsy material of your knickers, groaning as he sees you clench on nothing when the cool air meets your throbbing cunt, shiny with arousal. Fuck, baby. He mutters, voice above a whisper, you can’t tell if he meant to say it out loud.
He strokes himself on your clit, rubbing with his cock, goading needy little moans out of you. You feel like crying when his tip finally stretches your hole. You’re loud enough that Jude has to silence you with his lips as he fully fits the head of his cock in. He catches your whimper in his open mouth, gasping together when he places you higher on the wall, pushing deeper. You’re tight with the lack of prepping, but you’re wet. So deliciously wet. Taking him in like butter on a hot knife. He presses his face against your neck, grunting and breathing heavily. You’re left in an even more muddled state, spilling incoherencies, trying and failing to hold in your noises. You’ve completely given up on the silence, fuck it.
A grip on your face stills you, it’s then when you recognize the familiar callous hand covering your mouth–your noises. You don’t have enough time to tell him off, you couldn’t if you tried. His eyes burn on your skin, the warmth in your neck gone, you feel the tightness of his muscles in every buck of his hips, slapping against your skin. His stare is heavy on you– that alone flushes your cheeks. You push his hand away, instead tucking your head in his neck to muffle yourself , holding on for dear life while he thrusts faster and faster still.
  Your alternative catches your noises, poorly at that. Your eyes are shut, meeting his movements as you focus on the heat building in your stomach. He’s driving into your pussy like he’s trying to fuck you into the wall. Each word that tries to escape is garbled in your pipes, strangled and aching for release.
“You gonna come? Already?” He mocks you. “Come on, let me see my dumb girl.” Your grip softens around him, Jude maneuvers your face with his hand before fixing his palm to rest on your throat like he does although now looser. “What a mess…” You’re close, he can tell. Your stomach tenses, clenching onto him as if you’re dreading the second that he’ll pull out. He laughs, unsure of why but he tightens his grip, one that’s become so familiar on your neck that it’s grounding. The lack of air and the heaping pleasure turns your brain into a puddle, everything around you clouds, your own voice and the muffled music louder than it was, bouncing off the walls.
It’s when you open your eyes that your stomach drops, it’s a second that slips as soon as it passes. Your legs shake, thighs tensing around Jude. The same eyes you spent looking at the entire night stares back at you, wide and struck. Erling stands there, tense in his spot, taller than the space between the open door, music leaks in, almost blending with your high moans but the sound bleeds into his brain. He can’t describe what he felt strongest; jealousy, shock, or the tightness in his slacks. For now he swallows his own spit, the picture of your writhing body ingraining itself in every memory he has of you. Ruined. You’re completely ruined.
“Oh my–Erling–”
Jude smirks, “No, It’s Jude.” He teased, loud enough that all three of you could hear.
“N–no, I mean– It’s– Fuck. Oh god!”
“Yeah, that one works too.” It’s embarrassing how slippery you are inside, Jude rocking in and out of you like a piston with the stamina of an athlete.
Erling’s planted on the floor, it feels like he’s holding in a breath that’s stuck in his lungs. He should look away, but he can’t.
“Go ahead,” He whispers between thrusts, holding you against the wall. This time his words are close, only for you to hear. You have no choice, unable to utter a word, gasping, forced to take it. “Come for me while you look at him.”
It’s pathetic how you follow, eyes fixed towards the door when your orgasm crests in an explosion that leaves you shaking and trembling, legs wrapping tighter around Jude’s waist. Ultimately, you fail the task at hand, eyes nearly rolling back when your mind goes blank, the sensation tingles all the way to your satin shoes, throbbing and pulsing. His grunts turn into gasps, nails digging into your thighs when he climbs his own high, finally spilling into you.
You recollect, breathing heavily against each other. The last thing you saw were a pair of icy blues. As soon as you pick your head up from Jude’s neck, they’re gone.
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ruben-dias · 6 months
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gonna go cry for 17 years
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