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le-amewzing · 7 years

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Variable (part 1/2)

A side story in this AU, but it can be read on its own. Follow the Birds of a Feather tag for more.

Fic: "Variable" [FFN] [AO3] | part 2

Pairings/Characters: Yamaguchi Tadashi/Tsukishima Kei, Tsukishima Akiteru/Tanaka Saeko, Nishinoya Yuu, Hashimoto Kazuma, Hanamura Chigusa, with cameos from Ikemichi & Kagehina

Rating: M

Words: ~19,400 total; ~8,700 for part 1

Summary: Progress with Tsukishima is something of a multi-layered behemoth. Then Yamaguchi learns of something Tsukki forgot to tell him. *An AU oneshot set in my Birds of a Feather AU, but may be read on its own; set during "Opportunity" in the BoaF collection; slash.

Yamaguchi was a stranger to sleeping in. The last time he'd done it was…hmm. Freshman year of high school, at a training camp, actually. He'd lost that leisure in his second year, being vice-captain of the volleyball club, and he'd had to set an example as captain in his third and final year, but, man, it felt so nice waking up of his own volition and not to the trill of an alarm Sunday morning.

He sat up and yawned, able to appreciate the birds' chirping outside his window. He listened while he slumped against the wall on one side of his bed, and he didn't bother knocking as he spoke through the thin barrier. "'Morning, Tsukki."

"Good morning," Tsukishima said on the other side. He sounded wide awake, which piqued Yamaguchi's curiosity.

"Were you awake already?"

"Working," Tsukishima replied.

Ah. That made sense. Professor Matoh was always in a different time zone when he contacted Tsukishima, so that forced Tsukishima to keep odd hours at home. Still, Yamaguchi would've been happy if Tsukishima had lied and said he'd been waiting for Yamaguchi to get up. Oh, well.

"Saeko-san's party is at one-ish," his friend reminded him.

"I know! I thought I'd make something for breakfast, and we can take our time getting ready before we head out. So give me a few minutes—"

"…are you making French toast again?"

Yamaguchi stifled his snicker. Nothing quite compared to Tsukishima's sweet tooth, so it was a good thing he'd learned to make a few flames guaranteed to attract his moth of a friend. "I can, if you want," the freckled man stated as he got out of bed.

Silence answered him, but that was as good as a confirmation from Tsukishima.

Yamaguchi went straight to his kitchenette and took some eggs from the fridge. He cracked and whisked them into a shallow pan, and then he took three slices of bread and left them to soak. He ducked back to the bathroom, washed his hands, and grabbed the blue elastic headband hanging on his towel ring.

"Yamaguchi?" Tsukishima called into the apartment, and he closed the front door after him.

"In here!" the freckled man replied, pushing his hair back with the headband and rubbing cleanser on his cheeks.

Tsukishima appeared at the doorway to the bathroom, and Yamaguchi saw him raise one cream-colored eyebrow in the mirror. "What are you doing?"

"Washing my face," Yamaguchi mumbled as he used a power brush to scrub. A moment later, he rinsed his face and used the hand towel from the towel ring to dry, but he caught Tsukishima's bemused smirk, and he turned to his friend. "What?"

"Nothing," the blond lied, and he took a step closer and playfully flicked Yamaguchi's forehead—a wide, open target with his hair pushed back from his face.

Yamaguchi rolled his eyes and internally huffed while his friend scrutinized him. Sometimes knowing Tsukishima—as well as his older brother, Akiteru-san—was annoying, because the brothers were good-looking and had nothing to worry about. But Yamaguchi had always been conscious of his complexion because of his freckles. He'd learned to accept his freckles on his own after high school, but he'd found a kind of beauty routine that worked for him and, really, made him feel good. He'd also cut his hair short for work the past few years, but he was starting to grow it out again since he and Tsukishima were heading in the same direction now, so the longer hair, the nice skin—they added up to a Yamaguchi who felt more comfortable with himself.

His light brown eyes flicked back to Tsukishima when he realized the blond was still staring, and his heart thudded happily in his chest. He thought Tsukishima had come to make fun, but that soft, half-lidded gaze coupled with an imperceptible smile told another story: Tsukishima thought the sight before him was cute.

Yamaguchi snatched the headband from his hair and ran a hand through his tresses, breaking the trance. "Uh, um, I left the bread to soak for too long," he bumbled, shoving his way past the taller man.

Tsukishima said nothing and let him by, and he trudged quietly after him.

Good gods, Tsukishima was too much for his heart to handle, Yamaguchi fretted as he set another three slices in the egg bath and got to frying up the first three. He, Yamaguchi, had been on his best behavior since Tsukishima had accepted his best friend's feelings for him almost two months ago. He did hug the tall blond nearly whenever he wanted these days, and, sure, Yamaguchi was known to play dirty and remind Tsukishima verbally that he loved him. But all of that was so—so tame compared to what Yamaguchi really wanted to do. After all, he'd been sitting on these feelings for most of his life.

"Are you making them like last time?" Tsukishima asked right behind him, spooking the shorter man. Yamaguchi even put a hand over his heart and shot him a little glare.

"Of course. Once they're golden brown, I'll flip them, wait for golden brown again, then it's plate, butter, and powdered sugar." He turned, surprised to find he had Tsukishima's attention again. "Tsukki?"

Tsukishima blinked and shoved his hands in his sleep pants' pockets, but he kept his eyes glued to Yamaguchi's forehead, as if something troubled him.

"Oh, no. Is something sticking up?" Yamaguchi smacked the top of his hair down, flattening it.

But Tsukishima caught his wrist and stopped him. He flicked Yamaguchi's forehead again, gently, and then he leaned down slightly, brushed the other man's fringe back, and pressed a tiny kiss right there.

Yamaguchi knew better than to overreact. If he did that, he'd get a "Shut up, Yamaguchi" and scare the bashful blond away. So he took a breath to calm down and smiled up at Tsukishima instead, despite his elation.

That did the trick. Tsukishima was rooted to the spot, his fair skin reddening as he averted his eyes and waited.

Yamaguchi turned Tsukishima's chin towards him. He pulled gently on the blond's forearms, as well, steering Tsukishima down towards him. Then he finally, finally, after years and years of waiting, pressed his lips to his best friend's.

It was sweet. And it was supposed to be short, but Tsukishima went slack at his touch and stayed there, content to place his hands on Yamaguchi's waist as Yamaguchi held his face and continued the kiss. A demanding Tsukishima that turned docile once he properly had Yamaguchi's attention—

—this was a very good thing to learn, indeed.

Unfortunately, the giant child chickened out before Yamaguchi could stick his tongue in, and he sniffed the air. "I think something's burning," he stated, his eyes sliding to the stovetop.

Yamaguchi turned in his arms and plated the food before it was beyond redemption. "Dammit…! I was going to serve you the first batch, too…"

Stunningly, Tsukishima took the plate out of his hands and cut a forkful off before Yamaguchi could protest. "I'll make do," he said after he swallowed, and he turned for the living room, pointedly not catching Yamaguchi's grateful smile.

"I wonder what the others would do if they knew how much of a softie you are," the freckled man teased as he made up his plate and joined the other male on the couch.

Tsukishima shot him a withering look.

"I'm not saying I'll blab, Tsukki. Besides, Hinata and Kageyama and the rest know you're friendly. It's not that big a jump from 'friendly' to 'softie.' Though," he continued quietly, "I kind of like keeping some of you to myself."

Tsukishima said nothing in response, so they ate in silence, facing the blank screen of the television. Eventually Yamaguchi peeked at him, and he saw healthy color climbing up his neck again. Sometimes Tsukishima's gruff attitude spoke volumes, belied his otherwise happy mood.

They finished eating, and Yamaguchi put the dishes in the sink. Tsukishima stayed put, his eyes following his friend, so Yamaguchi humored him and returned to his seat beside Tsukishima, though he faced the blond now. "Something up?"

The spectacled man pursed his lips and leaned on his knee, cupping his cheek in his palm in a thoughtful pose. His golden eyes moved behind his lenses, roving over Yamaguchi and never stopping. "Just thinking," he said at last.

"Not overthinking, I hope," the freckled man joked, and he leaned forward, closer to Tsukishima, believing they might continue where they left off.

Tsukishima clearly understood his line of thought, as his blush deepened and he looked away, sitting up straight before Yamaguchi could do anything. "I need to shower," he stated a bit loudly, and he got up and left Yamaguchi's apartment.

Yamaguchi groaned once the door shut behind Tsukishima. "You and me both," he grumbled to himself. So much for continuing what Tsukishima had started….

A cool shower did the trick, even if this May was off to a slightly chilly start and Yamaguchi couldn't completely shake the idea that Tsukishima was being too much of a virgin around him.

The freckled man groaned again as he made sure he had a gift receipt for Saeko-san's presents in the gift bag before he headed out. He knew patience. He had patience. There was no being a pediatric nurse, no leading Karasuno's volleyball club, no befriending Tsukishima Kei without patience, and Yamaguchi Tadashi had it in spades.

Or did he? Tsukishima accepting Yamaguchi's love for him at last had been a gigantic step in the direction for which Yamaguchi had always wished. But Tsukishima had not said he, too, loved Yamaguchi, and he had yet to demonstrate it, really. All he'd told Yamaguchi before The Roost's grand reopening was that he didn't want to live without Yamaguchi. And that wasn't love.

Was it? It was hard to tell with Tsukishima, even if Yamaguchi did know him best.

"Yamaguchi, you ready?" Tsukishima called through the other thin part of their shared wall, that by their doors.

"Yeah. Don't forget her present!"

He could hear that stinker roll his eyes.

They met outside on the balcony and locked up. Tsukishima turned to go, but the sunlight glinted in an odd way off his glasses, so Yamaguchi caught his arm. "Hold on a sec—are your glasses broken?"

Tsukishima made a faced and removed them, but he squinted. "I dropped them in the bathroom, but they looked fine."

"You didn't check yourself in the mirror? There's a crack on the left lens, right near the nose piece."

The blond huffed. "Damn. I have a spare in my desk. I'll be right back."

"How could you not notice?" Yamaguchi asked with a chuckle as his fellow crow ducked back inside.

"Shut up, Yamaguchi!"

But Yamaguchi was snickering too hard to bother with "Sorry, Tsukki!"

A minute and a short walk later, Tsukishima had his spares on and he and Yamaguchi were on the train to a further part of the city. He sighed. "I don't even see why she insists on a birthday party."

"So her birthday was really yesterday. She's allowed to party when she can gather all the people she wants," Yamaguchi said. "I'm happy she gave me a week's notice so I could get today off from the clinic."

"I meant she's in her thirties and still having birthday parties."

Yamaguchi rolled his eyes and lightly bumped Tsukishima's leg with the gift bag. "There's nothing wrong with that. You and she had a small party for your brother back in March for his birthday. I'll still make you shortcake for your birthday even when we're sixty." He punctuated his promise by beaming at Tsukishima…and he dismissed the hint of discomfort in the taller man's bashful expression that followed.

With Saeko-san and Akiteru-san's house being just over half an over away, Yamaguchi refused to let their ride lapse into an uncomfortable silence. But he also knew asking his best friend about that kiss this morning would only cement this perceived awkwardness, so he instead cajoled Tsukishima to catch him up on A Uni's men's volleyball team, which Tsukishima helped coach fulltime now.

"Nothing much is happening right now," the blond answered. "The season's ended, and we're in the top ten, but there's definitely room for improvement. Sana-san and I will be putting together a regimen once their short resting period is over," he added, mentioning the head coach who'd worn him down to get Tsukishima to be assistant coach in the first place. "What?" he asked when Yamaguchi smiled.

"You seem happy there."

Tsukishima cocked his head to one side. "I guess."

"No, really. I couldn't stick with volleyball during university because of switching to the nursing program, and I wondered if you would after you got your snake degree—"

"It's called 'herpetology.'"

"—whatever, it's one step removed from dinosaurs, Tsukki—but then you started your master's and did keep with volleyball, just in a different capacity. It's nice."

"It's one way of life," the blond remarked, rolling his shoulders and leaning against the pole in front of Yamaguchi's seat. "I wasn't going to play professionally like King—"

Yamaguchi gave him a dry look at the childish, casual use of Kageyama's nickname.

"—but the money's not bad. Add in what Matoh-sensei pays me to transcribe his work, and it's nothing shabby. Although I could do with having finished my master's a year or two ago instead of later this year."

"He's an eccentric paleontologist who adores having you as his teaching assistant. Things could be worse. Such as your spare glasses breaking, too."

Tsukishima's mouth was a flat, unimpressed line. "Them breaking before we left was a bad omen. You want to kill me with the bad luck of my spares breaking, too?"

"Sorry, Tsukki." But Yamaguchi said it and stuck his tongue out at his friend, not buying into the idea of bad luck whatsoever.

The train pulled in a bit after the party presumably had started, but the two didn't rush to the house. It was barely a hop and a step to the newlyweds' home from the station, and it wasn't as though things couldn't start without them. In fact, music suddenly blared from the house as they walked up to the door, and the friends shared an apprehensive glance as the volume was lowered and Nishinoya threw open the door.

"Tsukishima! Yamaguchi!" he nearly shouted at them. He threw a green plastic lei over Yamaguchi's head and attempted to throw a pink one over Tsukishima's, but the blond intercepted it. "Fine," the tiny many said happily, "more for me!" And he promptly donned it, even though he already wore a purple one.

"Hello, Nishinoya-san," Yamaguchi managed once he recovered from the surprise. As he heard the songs change in the living room, he ventured, "Are we late? Sounds as if we've missed the fun."

Nishinoya motioned for them to follow him, and he shook his head as well as his hips as he attempted to dance and walk at the same time. "Nah. I got here first 'cause I did most of the food. And I brought the karaoke system!" He grinned broadly as he gave a dramatic wave to the scene in front of them.

Saeko-san, looking more and more pregnant every day, was at the system set up in the corner, to the right of the TV. She had a death grip on the microphone, a sign she had dibs on the first song…if not on all of them. Meanwhile, her husband arranged a small stockpile of gifts on the desk behind the couch, and Akiteru-san brightened when he spied his younger brother and his brother's best friend. "Kei, Tadashi."

Yamaguchi waved, but Saeko-san's head snapped up, hearing their names. She paused in her task and hopped over to meet them with hugs. "Heya, you two. You're tardy for once."

"But not last," Tsukishima reminded her, and the doorbell rang then, so Nishinoya zoomed by to let others in. The grumpy blond huffed when he heard Hinata's cheery voice, and he took up an unobtrusive post by some of the finger food in the kitchen.

The freckled crow let him be and passed their gifts to Akiteru-san. "Expecting a big crowd?" he asked the father-to-be.

Akiteru-san chuckled, a sound very different from the breathy sound his brother made, Yamaguchi noted. "Not really. Yuu arrived first to whip up the food, insisting we not lift a finger today." Despite that, he paused to straighten Yamaguchi's gift bag behind the other presents on the desk. "Then you and Kei came, and we invited Shouyou, Tobio, Yui, and Hayato, and of course Ryuunosuke and Chikara."

So far, everyone had turned up. Hinata made a face at Tsukishima, which the giant child returned, and lit up when he saw the karaoke system. Kageyama salivated over the food spread, and Michimiya and Ikejiri grabbed a seat in the tiny house before the place filled up.

"No Daisuke today?" Saeko-san asked the other married couple.

Ikejiri shook his head, and Michimiya answered. "Not today, Saeko-san. My boss was kind enough to offer to babysit, so I took him up on it, as he grew up with several younger sisters. So it's just us adults today."

Saeko-san pouted for half a second. Then she agreed that was for the best and gave her friend a giant hug, nearly smothering Michimiya as the blonde woman tended to do when she became a tad overzealous.

"Hey, Saeko-san!" Hinata piped up by the karaoke system. "How about we start off with a duet!"

"Whoa! I like your thinking, Shouyou!"

And so the party officially began.

Yamaguchi enjoyed himself. Even if he and Tsukishima did see many of these faces often because they ate at Saeko-san's bar a few times a week, they didn't often cut loose like this. Usually they came together for birthdays, but that tended to be at The Roost so Tanaka could make drinks and Nishinoya could stay in the kitchen, otherwise birthdays were private affairs if celebrated at all. That was why Yamaguchi appreciated today. No work. No being left alone with Tsukishima to make things even more awkward. Just fun with a makeshift family they'd all chosen years ago.

Tsukishima gravitated to Yamaguchi after his sister-in-law's opening duet, and he passed his friend a cookie that…sort of resembled a motorcycle, if one squinted at it. The blond eyed the freckled man surreptitiously. "It's…not bad," he admitted of the party, "just loud." He pursed his lips. "Can we go if it gets too noisy? Or worse—if my brother joins her for a couple's duet."

Yamaguchi chuckled, but he was pleased by the effort his grumpy friend was making, had been making since growing closer recently. Before, Tsukishima would be more demanding or do as he pleased. Now, he was slightly more courteous, such as now, making a plan with Yamaguchi instead of on his own. "Yes, if it gets to be too much," he agreed, and Tsukishima heaved a small sigh of relief.

Then Saeko-san cranked up the volume and jumped up and down with the music. "Woo, woo!" she almost yelled into the microphone.

Out of the corner of his eye, Yamaguchi saw Tsukishima's shoulders droop, and the blond stomped back to the kitchen. They wouldn't leave yet…but they might soon, the freckled crow mused.

Akiteru-san motioned for Yamaguchi to join him on the couch, and they and the Ikejiri couple cheered Saeko-san on as she sang. They laughed as Hinata took to dancing along with the music, though perhaps half a beat behind, and the redhead even swung his blue lei around. If he wasn't careful, he was going to crash into something.

And he did, right after Ikejiri and Michimiya went to greet Ennoshita and Tanaka, who had just arrived. Hinata banged his knee on the coffee table right as his audience dwindled, and the poor guy's eyes watered as he dropped to the floor on his butt.

"Good grief. Are you all right, Hinata?" Yamaguchi asked.

"I'll be fine…! Saeko-san, sing me one final song…!"

"Shouyou…!"

Yamaguchi shook his head and offered a hand so he could yank Hinata onto the couch in his place. "You need ice, but you're not dying."

"Thank you, Yamaguchi-sensei…!" Hinata called after him as he went to the kitchen.

"Doctor, nurse—there doesn't seem to be much of a distinction when I'm around all of you," he thought aloud with both Tsukishima's and Kageyama's eyes on him. He pulled an ice pack from the freezer, wrapped it in a tea towel, and pushed it on Kageyama. "Give this to your boyfriend over there and keep him from dancing in cluttered, enclosed spaces." There. With a guard dog like Kageyama around, Hinata would have only one injury today.

And Kageyama, with his cheeks full, nodded and scurried over. He bickered with Hinata for half a minute before the redhead sulked but caved, and Yamaguchi breathed easy.

"You'd think Hinata would be more mindful of his bad knees."

Tsukishima scoffed. "Those two are always over the top, though, horsing around even if it means someone gets hurt."

Yamaguchi began to nod…but he paused, considering his friend's phrasing. It said a lot, but he could detect no double meaning when he flicked his eyes to that pale face beside him.

Tsukishima raised an eyebrow at him, like "What?"

But Yamaguchi shook his head and smiled, leaning for a moment against the taller man's nearer arm.

He didn't stay in the kitchen long, since Saeko-san told her guests that everyone had to get up and sing at least once. Tsukishima avoided it by staring his sister-in-law down until she grew bored of bugging him, and Michimiya's stage fright was so bad that she turned into an incoherent mess. Kageyama knew no popular songs, so the funniest thing that day was his rendition of the Doraemon theme. Yamaguchi and Ikejiri called themselves Team Freckles and sang together, but even that and Hinata's enka couldn't hold a candle to Kageyama.

The birthday girl opened her gifts after her brother, Nishinoya, and Ennoshita joined them again after peeking at the nursery upstairs, and she loved everything. Some things were more like baby gifts, such as the onesies Yamaguchi had picked and the stuffed bear from the Ikejiris. Others had Saeko-san only in mind, like the glam gold cuff from Ennoshita and the punk-style hairclips from Tsukishima. But the distinction didn't bother her. She gathered her hair up in one of the clips and hugged the bear to her, enjoying them equally.

Nishinoya brought out a vanilla cake with orange crème next, and they dug right in, sung out for the evening. Good thing, too, because the day was winding down, and the Ikejiri couple were the first to leave.

Tsukishima wore a "thank gods" expression now that things wrapped up, but Yamaguchi poked his cheek.

"Hey," he told the grump, "we're not out yet. Best behavior, okay?"

The blond snorted at that.

Hinata and Kageyama were one step closer to heading home than they were, already at the door, but Saeko-san bemoaned everyone disappearing. "No…!" she whined, hugging the redhead. "Everyone, stay…!"

"I would," Hinata assured her as he used his old decoy skills and vanished from her grip, "but I have to get to the kindergarten early in the morning, Saeko-san, and Kageyama has morning practice."

She sighed while her husband added, "Besides, we don't exactly have the room, Saeko." So she conceded and let Hinata go from another, quick hug, and the talented duo left. Then she pouted at her brother, but Tanaka knew better. He shook his head and grabbed Ennoshita's hand, and they were gone before she even uttered a word.

She groaned while the rest found it amusing. "At least Kei's not abandoning us…!"

Yamaguchi yelped in surprise at the news. She couldn't mean…

But Tsukishima was glaring daggers at her, Akiteru-san was saying "He hasn't even accepted yet," and Nishinoya either had left or made himself scarce. So Yamaguchi looked from the couple to his best friend and back. "Um, you just mean he drops by a lot, right…?" he prompted.

Unfortunately, Saeko-san missed his discomfort and delivered the worst possible news: "No, we asked Kei to come live with us."

He was a good, faithful friend. He was the first to defend Tsukishima and the first to call him on his nonsense. He loved Tsukishima more than anyone in the world.

He also felt like the biggest idiot right now.

At least Saeko-san had read his hurt expression after her announcement and gasped, apologizing. But why apologize? It hadn't been mean of her and Akiteru-san to offer—they had the guestroom on the first floor, after all, beside the bathroom—and it wasn't her fault nor Akiteru-san's that the glasses-wearing…meanie walking beside him had failed to bring it up!

The walk to the station and the ride home had been dead silent, and the walk to their apartments threatened to be the same. Yamaguchi pounded the pavement ahead of Tsukishima, but it was a rather futile action. With his long legs and strides, Tsukishima was never far behind.

So Yamaguchi came to an abrupt stop and whirled around, focusing on keeping his voice even. "When?"

Tsukishima stuffed his hands in his pockets, his tone too easily calm. "When what?"

"When did they ask you?"

He closed his eyes and rubbed the back of his neck. "At the end of February. During that family dinner you missed."

Yamaguchi flinched. That wasn't fair, saying that. That was back when he'd been taking extra shifts at the clinic in order to put some distance between him and Tsukishima, because he'd been trying to put to rest feelings which he figured would never be returned, even though, unbeknownst to him, Tsukishima had been coming around to the idea of them as more than friends. So he ignored the snipe and narrowed his eyes at the taller man. "Why?"

"Be specific," Tsukishima chided.

"Why did they ask you?" This question made him the most nervous. Had Akiteru-san and Saeko-san guessed they were growing apart then, and for those reasons? Tsukishima had requested discretion until he felt ready to share them with the others, which Yamaguchi was fine giving, because he didn't necessarily want to put his feelings on display.

"They asked because the baby's due this summer and both Tanaka-san and I live away. You know her parents are gone, and mine are all the way in Miyagi. They say they want the company, but really they're looking for a live-in nanny." He sneered at the menial idea.

But Yamaguchi was able to breathe again, to slow his pulse. Oh. So…that was all. "Then," he started as they reached their complex and climbed the stairs to the second floor, "when were you going to tell me about their invitation? I mean, you and I made up. We more than made up." He halted Tsukishima with a hand on the other man's arm, and he slid his fingers over Tsukishima's wrist to hold his hand.

Tsukishima observed their linked hands. He opened his mouth…and closed it.

"You weren't planning on telling me." Yamaguchi dropped his hand.

Tsukishima made no effort to pick it back up.

"Why?"

"Wh—"

"Don't 'Why what?' me. You know exactly what I'm asking, Tsukki."

The blond shifted his weight on his feet, left to right to left again. "…I just haven't had the chance to turn them down yet."

"But you are going to turn them down."

Again, he kept his mouth closed.

Yamaguchi grimaced and shook his head at him. "Unbelievable," he muttered. "Goodnight, Tsukki," he grumbled as he unlocked his door. He felt broken and relieved all at once when he closed the door behind him. What a difference from this morning…

Ah, this morning with the broken glasses. Yamaguchi really had jinxed someone—himself—hadn't he?

"Thank gods for Monday mornings," Yamaguchi mumbled to himself at work the next day. He sat in the staffroom, updating some charts from last week. It was a nice task on which he could focus. That way he would put last night out of his mind.

Honestly. That Tsukishima…! Yamaguchi thought that his friend had outgrown his pussyfooting. The last time he'd seen that much hesitation from Tsukishima, the blond had been Karasuno's star middle blocker, fearing facing Shiratorizawa's Ushijima at the Spring High prelims. But they were adults now. They'd grown up…hadn't they? He sighed.

"Uh-oh. That's a pretty big sigh," said the man in the swivel chair behind him.

Yamaguchi glanced over his shoulder. "Hashimoto-sensei…sorry for disturbing your work."

The doctor waved him off, dismissing the apology. "Don't fret about it. I'm just thinking of the right words for a report." He went "oops" and covered his mouth when a few of the other nurses raised an eyebrow at him for sounding lazy. He rolled over to Yamaguchi. "But it did catch my attention. Need an ear?"

Yamaguchi smiled his thanks. "Thank you, but no. I'd rather work."

Hashimoto heaved a sigh himself, but it was clearly meant to be an exaggeration. "Very well, Yamaguchi-kun. Speaking of which"—he rolled back to his desk and returned to pass Yamaguchi another chart—"Yanagiwa-san should be here shortly, so have her sling off in Exam Room Three, please."

"Yes, Sensei."

Though he was a pediatric nurse, Yamaguchi met with many of the neighborhood's inhabitants at the clinic. Children were his specialty, since he had a way with them—a skill he attributed to being around Tsukishima, Hinata, and Kageyama, truthfully—but he saw to nearly as many elderly as he saw children. At least the various characters kept him on his toes and kept him from being bored.

Unfortunately, at the end of the day…the day ended. And that meant going home. But, on a Monday, that didn't mean Yamaguchi had any obligations.

He bought takeout on his way home, and it occurred to him that, to an extent, he and Tsukishima were repeating their fight from February. He didn't want that or mean for it to happen. But he also wanted one day to be angry.

That was why he was more receptive the following evening to reading Tsukishima's text. His phone buzzed an hour before his shift finished, and it was a short message:

-The usual?

Yamaguchi would play hard to get…er, hard to make up with, he decided. But that could still be done face to face, and he missed that pout. So he agreed:

-Sure. Order the filet and steak fries for me if you beat me there, thx.

It put a skip in his step as he waved to the other doctors and nurses as he left. But thinking of his best friend usually did. If Yamaguchi were truly honest with himself, he believed he could still love Tsukishima in spite of any cruelty the taciturn guy doled out. …it was an idea that both frightened him a little and made him sigh.

The trains were running fine tonight, so Yamaguchi got to The Roost in good time. He descended the stairs, music meeting his ears as he neared the final step. He had yet to get used to the bar having music now—it hadn't for years, and the quiet had been part of the bar's charm—but he didn't mind it. He and Tsukishima sometimes sat on the same side of the booth when they wanted to chat and hear each other, and it meant Yamaguchi had more chances to nod off on Tsukishima's shoulder, a favorite pillow of his.

He spotted his assistant coach friend in their usual spot, the booth in the back corner of the restaurant. Though some of their other friends were present, too, tonight, Yamaguchi went straight for the booth. If he and Tsukishima could make up sooner, the better, and Yamaguchi knew he stood a better chance of doing so if no one else interfered. But, as he neared and saw Tsukishima, his hope dwindled.

Tsukishima looked…fine. As if nothing were the matter. As if nothing bothered him.

Did that mean only Yamaguchi was in this fight?

Yamaguchi frowned and slid in across from the blond. "Hey, Tsukki."

Tsukishima was busy texting, but he nodded to his friend.

"Did you order yet?"

"Yes."

Yamaguchi put his bag beside him and waited for Tsukishima to put the phone away. But another minute passed, and another, with those slender fingers flying over the touchscreen.

Though Yamaguchi was mostly immune to Tsukishima's idiosyncrasies, this was a bit much. "Something work-related?" the freckled man asked, hoping to give him an excuse.

"No."

Now Yamaguchi huffed. He settled Tsukishima with a reproachful look while the blond's attention was on his phone, and Yamaguchi didn't look away even when Yamamoto brought their food and, reading the atmosphere, backed away hastily.

It wasn't until Yamaguchi began to cut into his steak that Tsukishima came up for air, and Yamaguchi focused on his food before Tsukishima made eye contact. But he did try to resume conversation. "Good day at work?"

Yamaguchi ignored him and ate. Childish, yes, but Tsukishima was often riled by childish behavior.

…except now. When Yamaguchi ate silently, Tsukishima shrugged and ate his sandwich. When they finished silently, Tsukishima paid the bill, and they went home in silence. At their apartment doors, Tsukishima bid him goodnight and went in first, so the nurse stood outside alone, utterly baffled.

What had just happened? Had Tsukishima really just ignored the bait? Did he really not care about how upset Yamaguchi was over Akiteru-san and Saeko-san's invitation?

Over the next few days, dinner played out like that, like a CD stuck on a track, repeating just a little and never advancing past its aural hiccup, past the scar on the disc. They didn't eat the same dishes at The Roost, no, but their interaction was the same. Their walks home were the same. And Tsukishima never deviated from the script, telling him "Goodnight" before entering his own apartment.

This was… Things were too calm, Yamaguchi thought at work while they dealt with a minor emergency and gave a teenager some stitches after a skateboarding accident right outside the clinic. The nurse's mind drummed up a thousand possibilities while he steadily sewed up the girl's shin, and he took a moment to himself after he told the girl's mother to take her to a fully outfitted hospital which could give her the attention she needed.

There were certain allowances in friendship, like being honest when other weren't or—and this part only now bugged Yamaguchi—letting some things slide. So Tsukishima might view this fight as Yamaguchi overreacting, but he might be willing to let it slide and possibly blow over because they'd been friends for so long. Yamaguchi would've smiled at this idea of special privilege if only he could make it past one possibility:

Tsukishima, in spite of recent actions, saw theirs as a relationship only between friends.

Fuck.

Yamaguchi let his forehead softly thud on the rounded edge of his desk in the staffroom, and he rubbed a knot of anxiety from his neck that Saturday evening. What Tsukishima had said at Saeko-san's party—"horsing around even if it means someone gets hurt"—had to have been a hint. Kissing was harmless so long as no feelings were involved, and it was disastrous when only one person's were involved…

A foreign hand landed on his neck and took over working the knot out. "Yamaguchi-kun?"

He swallowed his yelp of surprise and turned to the speaker, a fellow nurse who was his age. "H-Hanamura-san?"

But she wasn't touching him. She pointed behind him, and a lab coat sleeve ending in a waving hand appeared in his vision.

"Oh. Hashimoto-sensei." To be honest, that was a relief. Hanamura was pleasant and very kind to all the patients, but she often eyed Hashimoto's antics as the other, older nurses did: disdainfully. She was very prim and proper, so the idea of her rubbing anyone's shoulders was odd and weirded Yamaguchi out.

"You're moping again, Yamaguchi-kun," the doctor pointed out above him.

Hanamura nodded. "But your concentration is off the charts in the exam rooms, I've noticed. You've been taking blood pressure readings and pulses and doing the mental math in a snap, faster than everyone else. Like a human calculator," she finished appreciatively. She swapped a chart for one under his elbow and brushed a stray hair behind her ear. "I'm envious."

Yamaguchi gave her a wan smile. "I'm just doing my job."

"Not at the cost of your own health," Hashimoto scolded gently. He leaned down, obstructing Yamaguchi's view of the other nurse. "We're healthcare professionals. We know better than anyone not to push ourselves."

"But you do it anyway," Hanamura quipped nonchalantly. She biffed Hashimoto on the head with the chart and walked away, but he chuckled at her reprimand.

"Only a little," he corrected, though Yamaguchi knew that was a fib. Hashimoto tended to stay later than any of them. It was one reason why Hashimoto could get away with that air of airheaded-ness.

Yamaguchi politely batted his hand away, insisting he was fine. "Thank you, but I should get back to work."

Hashimoto stuck his hands in his pockets and shrugged. "All right. But take a break when your mind wanders, okay? I did mean what I said. A friend of mine sprained his wrist when we were in uni, but he kept coming to practice and doing backflips and somersaults and everything you shouldn't do when healing."

"Wait—you did gymnastics, Hashimoto-sensei?" Yamaguchi couldn't picture that. His demeanor, his unkempt hair, his comfortable clothes under his lab coat, his quick smile—frankly, they reminded Yamaguchi of Hinata, so Hashimoto seemed more like that athletic type.

But the older man didn't understand his surprise. "No, not gymnastics. Cheerleading."

"Cheer—?!"

"Anyway, take a real break. Doctor's orders." He raised his dark eyebrows, and his tone veered more on the edge of a leader's than just a simple neighborhood physician's. "The last thing you need is to have that superhuman focus snap when you least expect it, Yamaguchi-kun." He grinned then, making the tension fly away, and he briefly ruffled the younger man's hair, as Sugawara had with the first years in high school. It did little to put Yamaguchi at ease, but…it was comforting, nevertheless.

Work kept him busy. He ate a few more times with Tsukishima, with every meal silent as the last, but he refused to be the one to cave first. At the clinic, he took micro-breaks so he could zone out and purge his worries from his mind for a few hours, as Hashimoto suggested, and that helped. He could do this. He could hold on until he had the chance to ask the dino-loving assistant coach and researcher point-blank where they stood. Tsukishima was not going to have his way and win this war, friendly allowances be damned.

A part of Yamaguchi wished he could run this plan by someone else. He'd like to talk to Kinoshita and Narita the most, as Ennoshita's friends had taken a shine to the freckled crow when they'd begun to frequent The Roost, and their relationship most closely resembled his with Tsukishima, longtime friends to something more. They were great for chatting and, he'd bet, advice, but they hadn't been by the bar in a while. In lieu of them, Ennoshita would be another good ear when not absorbed in Tanaka at the counter, but Yamaguchi noted that the businessman, too, had not come around much lately, either. How strange. Kinoshita and Narita not being around was reasonable; the trio of friends were fellow crows but hadn't played volleyball for Karasuno, so only Ennoshita had a solid excuse for dropping by most nights now that he and Tanaka were dating. But for Ennoshita not to be around… Well, Yamaguchi hoped he and Tsukishima were the only ones fighting around here.

He considered opening up to Hanamura. He liked her and liked her frankness when one asked for it. They'd started at Kawakami Clinic at the same time and had helped each other a lot during training—she'd even cracked a joke once about getting him a rose barrette to match hers since his hair had been longer at the start, but he'd cut it not long after so he wouldn't have to fuss with it at work—so he considered her his closest work friend. Hashimoto was nice, too, but the doctor remained one of his bosses, first and foremost. It was likely safer to disclose to a friendly coworker that he was in love with another man than it was to out himself to his boss.

But he didn't get the chance to speak with her. With May halfway over and various Golden Week training camps a few weeks behind them, the clinic saw an uptick in sports-related injuries that only reared their ugly heads now. In addition, pollen counts were high since there'd been no rain to wash the golden dust away, so people came in for every allergy treatment and remedy under the sun. With no shared breaks or lunches, it was easy to miss even saying "hello" to Hanamura.

Still, he was glad when his shift ended Wednesday night. He changed out of his scrubs and into jeans and a three-quarter-sleeve shirt since it felt more like spring than summer today, and he put his things in his bag, figuring he'd do laundry when he first got home.

Hashimoto spied him leaving the men's lockers. "Good work today, Yamaguchi-kun."

"Thank you."

"Heading home? I'll walk you out."

Yamaguchi shook his head. "You don't have to, Hashimoto-sensei."

But the doctor held up a Pocari Sweat. "I can clean up crumbs in the staffroom, but I'm banned from having liquids in there, remember?"

He did. Hashimoto had a penchant for spilling drinks even though he could handle a saline solution just fine. Yamaguchi and Hanamura had been the ones to ban even water in the staffroom.

Hashimoto held the door open for him, and they stepped outside. The doctor took a grateful gulp, exclaimed he was no longer parched, and turned to Yamaguchi. The nurse sensed his smile. "Reluctant to go home, Yamaguchi-kun?"

Yamaguchi frowned, tugging his backpack's straps on his right shoulder. He rolled his foot on its side. "Not really," he fibbed, but he knew otherwise. There'd been no dinner text tonight. Tsukishima was probably letting him stew tonight.

"Then do you want to talk about what's on your mind?"

The freckled man glanced at him, unsure. He disliked that Hashimoto was so good at reading people.

Hashimoto smiled again, as if he knew exactly what Yamaguchi thought. "Do you know why I became a doctor, Yamaguchi-kun?"

Yamaguchi shook his head.

"Simple, really. My grandmother, who'd raised me for most of my life, died when I was in university."

"I'm so sorry."

Hashimoto gave him a "Don't worry about it" look. "It's an average story. I think plenty of others share it. But, before I became a general physician, I studied sports medicine."

Yamaguchi gaped at him. "So did I!"

"And, before that, I studied psychology. Before that, sociology."

Okay, now he was lost. "…um, I…did not…"

Hashimoto laughed and clapped him on the back. "It's all right. I didn't tell you to get you down. I'm just saying I was all over the place. Well, sociology was like judo, I did it because Haru did, but—" He stopped his train of thought there, not bothering to explain the anecdote, if it could be called that. His brown eyes softened. "What I'm trying to say is that I've studied people my whole life. So you can tell me what's going on, if you need an ear. Or I can study you until I figure it out."

The last part was said jokingly, but it still made Yamaguchi's cheeks warm with embarrassment. "No, please don't."

Before Hashimoto could nudge him more, the clinic door popped open, and Hanamura stuck her head out. "Ah! Found you." She passed the doctor something. "Don't leave your bottle cap in the office. All beverages must be capped when leaving and entering the clinic, Hashimoto-sensei." Her blue–green eyes flicked to Yamaguchi. "Yamaguchi-kun? What are—" She stopped short and looked past him, making Hashimoto and then Yamaguchi turn, as well.

Tsukishima had stopped a few feet up the road from them. And the hard edge of his jaw told Yamaguchi he was anything but emotionless tonight.

"Tsukki?"

The blond's eyes darted from Hanamura to Hashimoto to Yamaguchi, but he didn't stomp around and leave; he might've guessed Yamaguchi wasn't in the following mood these days. So he strode up to his best friend, took his bag from him, and slinked off home.

Yamaguchi's eyes widened in surprise, but then he recalled his setting. "Oh, uh, guess my friend came to pick me up," he spluttered to the nurse and doctor, and he waved to the bewildered pair as he hustled after the unannounced arrival.

Tsukishima's lips were sealed, even all the way up the stairs at their complex, but he froze outside their doors.

"Tsukki?" the freckled crow tried again.

"…you don't stop and hang out with your coworkers after work."

"Well, I haven't, no. But Hashimoto-sensei was asking if I'm okay. My colleagues can sense I'm upset, something which I wasn't sure you could still be, until now." He sighed. "But, unless you have something to say, we're still fighting, and I'm going inside."

"Look—"

Yamaguchi raised one eyebrow, his key in the door.

"I hadn't had the chance to turn my brother and Saeko-san down."

He noted the tense, but he wouldn't allow himself to get excited until Tsukishima said it. "And?"

Tsukishima wrinkled his nose as if he were allergic to the word "sorry." "I did turn them down."

Nearly a week and a half's worth of anxiety flew away, and Yamaguchi jumped on him, hugging him tight. "Tsukki! You mean it?"

Tsukishima scoffed. "I do. I told them last week, but you weren't talking to me, so I came up with a sort of option since I'm not going to be a live-in nanny."

Yamaguchi could forgive the delayed news since his silent treatment had worked a little too well. "Then what?"

The blond nodded to Yamaguchi's key still in the door, which the latter grabbed, and he had the other man come over instead. He dropped Yamaguchi's bag inside the door, and they toed off their shoes. "On days she or they need a break, I'll do some of my research at their place or do Matoh-sensei's work there. If it comes up, I've already cleared it with Sana-san that I can bring the kid to practice on occasion, though I'll be strictly observational from the window in the coaches' office until the kid's old enough to walk and dodge balls."

Yamaguchi's heart swelled, and he leaped on his friend a second time, not minding that Tsukishima staggered back some. "Oh, my…! Tsukki! Look at you, being the responsible uncle! And the baby hasn't even arrived yet."

"Yes, well, I don't want to move." He clasped his hands at the small of Yamaguchi's back, holding the shorter man in place.

Yamaguchi gazed up at him, reading those eyes, hearing an echo of Tsukishima's "Maybe I can live without you, but I don't want to" in his head. With their chests pressed together, he could feel Tsukishima's heartbeat, too. But the blond's was pounding in his chest. "Tsukki…I believe you."

The pounding didn't cease.

"So why were you angry tonight?"

Yamaguchi gave a tiny gasp of surprise as Tsukishima tightened his long arms around the nurse. "It's…stupid," he muttered.

"How about I be the judge of that?"

"I thought…you were flirting with that doctor."

Say what now? "Come again?"

Tsukishima gave him a glare normally reserved for Hinata or Kageyama. "I thought you were flirting with him. He was, with you. And then I remembered you'd put in extra shifts a few months ago—"

"Okay. Stop there. I already told you that was to put distance between you and me. I didn't start seeing someone. I never have," Yamaguchi stated…though that last bit was a little white lie. But he immediately shoved those memories aside and put his palms on Tsukishima's chest, staring at him. "And I was not flirting. Neither was Hashimoto-sensei. I've never seen him flirt with any of the nurses."

"…but you're the only male nurse."

"And, of the four doctors on staff, there's only one female one. So what?"

Tsukishima grumbled at that.

But Yamaguchi was smiling, very widely. He tilted his head up and leaned in more, forcing Tsukishima to stagger again. "You were jealous, Tsukki."

"No, I wasn't."

Yamaguchi snickered. "It's all right. That and you not moving out mean you care. You chose me, just as I chose you."

Tsukishima began to growl, but Yamaguchi shut him up with a kiss. Tsukishima's irritation cooled, and his breath transformed into a breathy little pant when Yamaguchi backed off before he could deepen the kiss. The blond furrowed his brow, on the verge of pouting, but he stayed put when Yamaguchi kissed him again, his cheeks pinking with Yamaguchi's tongue in his mouth this time and hands pushing his thin, gray hoodie off.

Somehow, the next thing Yamaguchi knew, Tsukishima sat on the floor with Yamaguchi in his lap, his hands in place still at the small of the freckled man's back. Yamaguchi's knees were on either side of him, and Yamaguchi's excitement pricked up the longer they kissed, the more Yamaguchi tugged up on Tsukishima's shirt. His dark, freckled hands were on that smooth, pale skin… He thought about unbuttoning and unzipping Tsukishima's jeans one second, and his fingers deftly followed through the next…

"Yama…guchi…," the blond breathed as Yamaguchi began to kiss and suck the hollow at his neck.

The waistband of Tsukishima's boxers was right there, just below his fingertips…

"Yamaguchi…"

Ah, Tsukishima lying down beneath him, his t-shirt wrinkled and pushed up partway, his fair skin reddening too easily…what a sight…

"Yamaguchi!"

Hearing his name in that sharp tone, Yamaguchi snapped out of his delirium and looked down. His best friend was completely disheveled, shirt and hair a mess, glasses pushed up and askew. The freckled crow froze. "Oh, gods. I'm so sorry, Tsukki! I swear I wasn't gonna put it in!"

Tsukishima turned Nekoma red and flicked Yamaguchi's forehead. "For crying out loud—you better not have thought of that." He got to his elbows, leaning on them, propped up so they could be eye to eye. He fixed Yamaguchi with a disgruntled half glare and straightened his glasses. "This," he said with a gesture to his unruly state, "is too much."

Yamaguchi's face fell. "But…you chose me."

Tsukishima pecked his cheek. "I did," he confirmed.

"And you know I love you."

"I do."

Yamaguchi got to his feet. "People who care for each other show it," he continued, his voice wavering. "So you're fine with hugs and kisses, like children?"

"I would hope kids don't kiss like that—"

"But touching each other is out of the question?"

Tsukishima fidgeted under his gaze, his cheeks rosy. "I've never given it any thought," he mumbled.

"But I have. I've thought about it often, for a very long time. Since university. Since high school. Shit, maybe even the end of middle school," Yamaguchi confessed, knowing how bad it sounded. "Is sex the problem? Is it our friendship? Or," he rasped, "is it that I'm a guy, too?"

Tsukishima tugged his shirt down, stretching it to cover his crotch so he could fix his pants. "Yamaguchi…"

"Don't." Yamaguchi crammed his feet into his sneakers and reached for the doorknob. "Until you figure out the answers to those questions, leave me be." He yanked the door shut behind him.

And that was how Yamaguchi and Tsukishima landed themselves in Round Two.

I felt this story was so long and deserved to be broken into 2 parts, so please click here for the rest! The roller coaster has yet to stop. ;P

~mew

#hq!!#haikyuu!!#Birds of a Feather #tsukkiyama #yamaguchi tadashi #tsukishima kei #mew writes too much #fanfic #akisae #saekiteru #tsukishima akiteru #tanaka saeko #nishinoya yuu #hashimoto kazuma #hanamura chigusa

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