#FUCK I FORGOT TO ADD THE LINK RIP

[ge]

forgot to add to that ask with a link how much i love it when people draw the older chung myung with a kind of nasty smile. i <3 that asshole and it makes it even funnier to me when i remember that new chung myungs body is apparently prettier and more handsome. yesss he was a little ugly before that didnt stop tang bo though (propably not ugly but i sooooo love your hc that he really didnt fit the fantasy beauty standard. Our headcanon)

YESSi know exactly wat ur talking about..his grimace smirk.. its so funny to think about how he could get away w making all those ugly faces of his back then when he wasnt “pretty” and nobody would say a thing but now that hes in this new pretty boy body everyone has to comment on the fact how its a shame how pretty he is when all he does is make those same stupid fucking faces

geomjon was so masculinely handsome and attractively ripped but only in a way that was perceivable to gay men or like. lesbians… thankfully tang bo bagged that hot man before anyone else could come to their senses

#geomjon not fitting the beauty standard is my fave hc foreva.. #every time i read smth that says he was ugly i wag my finger and go nuh uh

[painfullyaverageravenclaw]

My Favorite Vtuber Songs

This list is literally only because I want a chance to infodump about covers and original songs that make me really happy.

King cover by Kuzuha

I mean,,,how could I not have King on this list. This was the first song that I heard Kuzuha sing and fell in love with his voice. To me, Kuzuha sounds the same when he sings and talks. I think that's really interesting lol

2. Excuse my rudeness but could you please RIP by Mori Calliope

Literally my favorite song by Cali. The video hurts my eyes but besides that, I like that they used her model for it! I think that was really creative.

3. Dreamin Night cover by Suntempo (Roberu Yukoku, Temma Kishido, and Astel Leda)

Holy shit this!!! Roberu rapping is everything I needed and more. Temma being all shy n shit is so cute! Not to mention Astel's deeper rapping was super cool. I need more suntempo rapping.

4. King cover by Belmond Banderas

This song was my first time hearing Bel sing and holy fucking shit I was blown away. I already like his speaking voice, finding it calming. Hearing him sing is like being blessed by the gods, sounding literally otherworldly.

5. King cover by Pavolia Reine

Holy fuck. This is the perfect remix king needed. I feel like it adds a certain edge that other covers can't achieve with just voice. Not to mention the video has a fun playfulness that adds to the edge.

6. Hope in the dark by Luxiem (Ike Eveland, Vox Akuma, Mysta Rias, Luca Kashiro, and Shu Yamino)

This right here is my favorite NijiEN group song. It's the perfect mix of something that's more on the jazzy side but has hints of pop. It scratches a certain part of my brain just right. Not to mention it spawned funny memes. I was pleasantly surprised by everyone's voices.

7. Graveyard shift by Mori Calliope ft BOOGE VOXX

Complete serotonin. This song right here makes me wish I knew japanese so I could sing along. This song packs a punch and pleases my brain so much.

8. Daddy daddy do cover by Rikka and Natsuiro Matsuri

Oh my god. Their voices blend with each other so well. Not to mention the absolutely stunning work for the art and the cute outfits Matsuri and Rikka are wearing. I hope they perform this one live.

9. Daddy daddy do cover by Oga Aaragami and Ayuna Risu

They performed this song twice with each version having one of them lead. The one I linked was Oga's but Risu's is just as beautiful. I actually forgot that the song wasn't originally jazzy because I was so used to their covers lol

10. Memeshikute cover by Kenmoshi Touya, Shellin Burgundy, and Uzuki Kou

If you want to laugh so hard you cry looking at a music video, this is it. I've laughed so hard at a music video. Especially at the end with Kanae, Kuzuha, Kagami, Yashiro, Belmold, Chaika, and Maimoto with the pom poms. You can really tell who was happy to be there and who wasn't.

11. Mitsu no Aji by Rain Drops (aka Elu, Akina Saegusa, Rushen, Suzuki Masaru, Joe Rikiichi, and Warabeda Meji)

This was my first Rain Drops experience and god do I not regret it. I wish I found them sooner so I could fully appreciate their music. I don't know if Rain Drops is retired because Meji graduated but I hope they continue to make music, even if they are missing a member.

12. Identity cover by Astel Leda and Seto Kazuya

There are no words I can use to describe how much I love this cover. I already really liked Seto's singing voice (which was one of the main reasons why I subbed to him) so hearing him with Astel was a blessing.

13. Tsunami by Finana Ryugu

When I saw that Kira helped with this song, I knew this one would be good. I love the lyrics so much. Funny enough, I don't really imagine Finana's character singing this song. I imagine a lesbian siren who seduces men for the fun of it lol

14. Doggy God's Street by Korone Inugami

I always thought Korone could sing beautifully but her rapping is another level. I love the music video too. It's so stylized and so cute! Literally my favorite art style. Plus all the little references are a nice touch too.

15. Otome Kaibou cover by Taka Radjiman

This song had made me cry more times than I'd like to admit. It's such a beautiful piece and Taka's voice really sells it. I wanna get this song tattooed in my brain I love it so much. Taka's voice to me is like a warm cup of tea while sitting in the car with the heater on waiting for someone to finish whatever they're doing so you can go home if that makes any sense.

16. Mitsu no Adji cover by Akina Saegusa

I know I put the original song on this list (and Akina is literally in the original song) but listen. Hearing Akina sing by himself makes the song much more depressing than it already is. Hearing Akina sing by himself made me want a solo cover of the song by other Rain Drops members.

17. Chronos cover by Ike Eveland

Holy fucking shit this cover right here. Ike already has a really pretty voice that feels like an angel is singing to me but hearing him go from singing to death screaming is such a switch that I didn't know I needed to hear till now.

18. Envy Baby cover by Kanae

I will never be able to fully explain how much I love Kanae's voice (and Kanae in general) and this song is what I show people when they wanna hear a vtuber cover a song. Hell, I show this cover to people who just wanna know what music I like.

19. Hail Holy Queen cover by Levi Elipha, Nagao Kei, DebiDebi Debiru, Melissa Kinreka, Genzuki Tojiro, Todoroki Kyoko, Sister Claire, Sukoya Kana, and Hayase Sou

First of, yes, this song is from Sister Act. Yes, the movie is random. Yes, there is quite a list of livers in this song. It doesn't stop it from being fucking hilarious and amazing. At first, I was so fucking confused I'm not gonna lie but it quickly grew on me.

20. Cendrillon cover by Levi Elipha and Genzuki Tojiro

Holy fucking shit this. This song makes me weep /pos. I have never been so emotionally moved randomly when listening to a song before. I had just randomly found this song one day via one of those youtube playlists and I have fallen in love with this song. I want this song played at my wedding.

21. Identity unofficial cover by Shu Yamino

Shu didn't cover this song officially but I still really think it's nice. I'm in love with Shu's voice. I hope he does an official cover of this song some time. Preferably a solo cover because I think this song is so perfect for his voice. Also support the artist because this was their fanmade MV.

22. Dizzy Dizzy cover by Kanae and Akina Saegusa

These two need to sing with each other more often I swear. Their voices compliment each other so well. Two of my favorite Nijisanji singers singing together is like a dream to me. I know Kanae and Kuzuha are like the main duo but Akina and Kanae should do more stuff together.

23. Matoryoshka cover by Akina Saegusa and Fuwa Minato

I recently found this cover and I prefer this version to the original. I also really like the artstyle that the music video is in. I like seeing this side of Akina, even if it's just in art. I would love to see more art of Akina and Fuwa based off of this cover.

24. W.I.M by Arurandeisu

Arupapa out here rapping his heart out. I was super surprised to have stumbled upon this song and fell in love with it. Holostars does not get enough recognition and I feel like Aruran's song fit's the loose casual vibes Holostars gives me.

25. Pentas by Holostars (Roberu Yukoku, Arurandeisu, Kageyama Shien, Temma Kishido, and Oga Aragami)

I love Holostars. I love them so much man.

Anyways, I'm done ranting for now. I love vtubers a lot and they have helped me through a lot. I really like ranting about livers and enjoying their dumb content.

#holostars #vtubers #hololive #nijisanji #nijisanji en #nijisanji jp #nijisanji id #michael is losing their mind to the hyperfixaction

[the-stove-is-on-fire]

AND THEN THERE’S DANNY

I saw THIS photo-set and immediately knew just what I had to do. 

#Danny Phantom #danny fenton #sam manson #tucker foley #redraw #stove on fire #9859 #FUCK I FORGOT TO ADD THE LINK RIP

[rens-room]

kuroko no basket thoughts: 

season 1 (2 and 3 under the cut) 

pick one name for this show please. and no it can’t be “the basketball which kuroko plays” bc that’s way too long. 

it’s comfort show time! (I’m gonna get hate but I enjoy knb more than haikyuu-I’m only explaining that if asked). 

these kids are so extra lol. 

“ball is life”

I did learn almost everything I know about sports from sports anime and thats kinda helpful. 

do you ever go up to someone you just met and make them outrageous promises and also declare yourself their partner? no? just kuroko things. 

poor kise gets treated like an attack dog bc he can mimic attacks and he really doesn’t deserve that. 

it’s funny bc the whole show is about middle school trauma (and drama) which is...pretty accurate. 

also underneath all the absurd powers/abilities the narrative is really sweet and the story itself is about friendship. the super extra abilities and visuals are just to draw you in and add another layer because anime/manga is a visual storytelling medium. 

gotta love how kuroko just does risky things and then his tall friends come to back him up. 

he promised kagami a partnership for basketball but kagami is really acting as his bodyguard to keep kuroko safe so they can actually play basketball. 

does mitobe ever...speak? 

midorima and midoriya are green and lucky. (no really, I refer to midoriya as deku to avoid mental confusion between the characters). 

is midorima’s way of shooting threes even...possible/practical? (I’m sure this has been answered before but please send me links if it has). 

it’s the color coordinated flip phones for me.

you know it’s 2000s- 2010s anime when they start bringing out the colored flip phones. 

midorima is that bitch with everyones star chart memorized and you best believe he knows everyones lucky items too. 

despite being some of the more basic character designs, I really like takao, izuki, and imayoshi. 

hyuga is great. of course his personality is a little warped after having to destroy his figurines. 

on that note aida is a sadist which is also great. 

tbh all of the miracles are treated like tools by their highschool teams and thats 1 rude, 2 kinda fucked up, and 3 the reason they’re all stuck up assholes with god complexes. 

the FUCKING TENSION at the tables when kise, midorima, kagami, and kuroko are at the restaurant together. (also takao leaving midorima there like the chaos agent he is, *chefs kiss*).

the flying food that just so happens to land on midorima’s head for me. (good job takao!)

SAKURAIIIIIIIII my favorite apologetic mushroom!! I love him.

they really called him “mushroom #9” ahhhhh. 

honey lemons...no not like that. 

so theres the “defeat my evil ex teammates” angle or the “defeat my evil exes” angle and both are correct. 

its the ken burns-esque montages for me. 

ah I forgot about kaijo’s rebound bitch. he’s loud. 

imayoshi is such a snake. I love him.

kaijo got the best deal on a miracle. aomine is Difficult to work with, midorima is crazy, murasakibara doesn’t even like the sport, and akashi is Crazy™. kise is objectively the most normal and easiest to have on a team. plus he (debatably) has the best ability: perfect copy.

season 2

ah yes get ready for himura tatsuya and Cringe english.

also tepei you literally broke the “first years only” rule you helped create.

when murasakibara is on screen: attack on titan theme intensifies.

I think I like the visuals for the first op of season 2 (3rd overall op) the most. (it may be my overall favorite op). 

murasakibara YOU CANT JUST RIP OFF SOMEONES EYEBROW!

vanishing drive here we come!

the real question is how himuro played street ball in jeans.

for midorima size does matter lol. 

blond hyuga is always funny.  

izuki being called cutie by the coaches dad lol. 

ah the required hot springs fanservice episode.  

being out of highschool now (I’m rewatching knb) the Kirisaki Daiichi High match is more painful. hanamiya is too cruel to ruin people’s lives like that. 

the best scene is in episode 38. it involves scissors. 

akashi literally owns all of them. he’s not your “former” captian if you still come when called. 

akashi you can’t just stab people. 

also your bangs look terrible akashi. 

forget midorima’s shots, how TF does aomine do this!! are they possible? or would making them irl be more luck than skill? 

midorima looks like a carrot in his uniform with the orange and green. 

the best part of this is the matches are pretty short all things considered like theres two 6 episode matches and the final is like 9 but most are resolved kn less than five.

as a short person™, murasakibara personally offends me.  

phantom shot is so hype. 

I love how they name attacks like in shonen. it’s really cute. 

why’s my favorite character type either pretty boy: himuro and takao or psychopath: akashi??

it should be illegal to not only break the basket but also single handedly lift up another human. 

is kise allowed to talk to kagami and murasakibara during the yosen match? what was he doing so close to the court?

I’ve always thought hyuga, riko, and teppei gave off poly relationship vibes. they all look at each other/interact in the same way.

kagami as a point guard actually made me laugh out loud. it’s so out of character for him and it surprised yosen.

I love the end cards with the characters at the end of every episode.

crunchyroll has given me so many quest protein bar ads. is it because I’m watching sports anime?

himuro’s fakeouts give me death note “I know that you know that I know” vibes.

is the montage music the same as an op? if so which one?

season 3

I SHARE A BIRTHDAY WITH A KNB CHARACTER! 

it’s fun that seirin comes full circle and plays kaijo basically last in the winter cup as they were the first team they scrimmaged in the series.  

the pacing and balance of the show is one of the best parts. its complete and flows well . 

the black wristband is so subtle, yet it’s been there since the beginning, such good foreshadowing. I honestly only noticed because I’m rewatching. 

the nostalgia of the opening narration about the generation of miracles. yes it will get tiring like the first one, but I enjoy the throwback/reference. 

one of the show’s strong points is the ability to circle back to things. combined with the steady pacing and overall balance between matches, training arcs, and fun excursions, knb is one of the most well rounded and complete feeling anime I have seen. 

1 I forgot about haizaki, 2 he looked better with his middle school hairstyle, 3 he and hanamiya would get along like a house on fire. 

the transition in the opening narration of the miracles from teiko to their current team’s uniform is so smooth and visually pleasing. especially akashi’s because you can see his eye change color. 

the fireworks in the opening are kinda random but they are fun. 

so I really loved bungou stray dogs op trash candy and it got me into granrodeo. I also remember liking (and still like) the music in knb. imagine my surprise when I found out granrodeo is responsible for like half the music in knb. 

there’s so many grudge matches lol. 

season three, the season of backstory and flashbacks. 

aomine to haizaki: the only one who can mess with my friends is me.

ah the not so subtle introduction of rakuzan. 

akashi has cat eyes. he literally is a cat. 

ok but during the shutoku match when akashi ankle breaks two guys at once and then literally dribbles the ball over one of their heads. power move. 

takao and midorima’s threes in the rakuzan match remind me of hinata and kageyama’s Freak-Quick attack. 

I love mibuchi. so much. and hayama. so rakuzan might be my favorite team after seirin...

akashi is short. and a bit of a psychopath, but mostly short. 

the bokushi/oreshi thing is a lot more obvious to see (hear) in a rewatch of the show. 

SHAKE MIDORIMA’s FUCKING HAND AKASHI! 

midorima doesn’t bow low, kinda like another tall, (standoffish) glasses-wearing character- tsukishima. 

“declaration of war” “return the favor” kise is such a dynamic character and I like him for that. 

isn’t kise a little too op? 

awww I forgot furihata plays in the kaijo game. 

kasamatsu is actually really cool. 

it’s a shame that every new technique kuroko comes up with is defeated so quickly.  

the TEIKO DAYS OP OMG I’M GONNA CRY!! THEY’RE SO SMALL AND CUTE AND INNOCENT AHHHHHHH! (episode 63) 

knb is about fixing friendships/repairing relationships and I think that’s really sweet. 

the similarities between aomine and kagami meeting kuroko are so good (and painful). 

kuroko just really loves and cares about his friends. which is really nice to see. 

the height difference between nijimura and akashi at teiko. 

kuroko really said: my life was kinda a disaster, and then akashi happened and I picked up a misdirection book, and then it really turned into a disaster. 

onigiri oops I mean Ogiwara-kun! 

the miracles are sooooooo cute in middle school! they’re tiny and look so young and not traumatized. 

underrated part of the teiko flashbacks is seeing whatever ridiculous item midorima is carrying around. 

true talent is throwing a box of snacks like a basket ball and successfully hitting a moving target in the face. 

me confusing personality types with Japanese blood type stereotypes: theres no way midorima is type B, he should be type A. me after reading what Japanese blood type stereotypes are: ah never mind midorima is selfish and uncooperative. 

knb is also about unlearning behaviors/thought patterns to be a better person. and making fucking friends. 

watching the miracles fall apart is not easier the second time, if anything it hurts more because you know it’s coming and there’s nothing you can do.  

teiko was so toxic! like on every level the ideology of the school caused harm to literal children. 

akashi does have a wholeass suit of armor in the dining room wtf. 

there’s also of course the competing victory philosophies explored in the show not to mention the sport elements that are outside my immediate range of knowledge. 

look at what you did, teiko: you fucked up a perfectly good group of kids, now they have god complexes. 

so not only is Tsuchida’s girlfriend really pretty, but she’s also smooth af! way to make your s/o feel good about not being a starter! 

the love I feel for mitobe, he’s honestly so great. he’s tall, quiet, and can cook. 

of course rakuzan get’s their own op, they’re the final battle. 

HAHAHAHA HOW DOES IT FEEL TO GET REPLACED?! (jk I love mayuzumi) but really making a kuroko 2.0 and debuting him during finals is cruel. 

is mibuchi’s earth shot like allowed? is it ok to intentionally foul the opponent to get a free throw? or am I just overthinking this?

nebuya you don’t have to add “muscles” to all your move names. in fact please don’t. 

YOU CAN’T DUNK YOU’RE ONLY 5′8″!! (not fair!) 

hyuga gets stuck in his own head a lot. 

only akashi would know how to manipulate the human body into kneeling. 

rip mayuzumi. he gets used by everyone. his team, akashi, and kuroko. I would not be able to go back on the court knowing that I’m just a tool. 

I honestly forget about the zone every time I watch knb. I could probably live without it. the flashy moves on the court were enough for me. 

he’s baaaaacckkkk!!!

I like that while a winner was established, all the teams were still motivated for the future. 

was anyone going to tell me nijimura and akashi switched jersey numbers at teiko when akashi took over as captain?? or was I just supposed to piece that together myself?

the extra episode for kuroko’s birthday is so cute! 

midorima calling takao because his luck is bad and he saw a black cat is too funny. 

it’s ok kuroko! for one day out of the year people remember you!

takao the delivery man: he specializes in special items for cancers and the occasional human named midorima shintaro (or himuro tatsuya lol). 

furihata really has the worst luck lol. he opens the door and it’s akashi. 

(last game is dead to me)

#kuroko no basket #kuroko's basketball #kuroko tetsuya #kagami taiga #kise ryōta #aomine daiki #midorima shintarou #takao kazunari #murasakibara atsushi #himuro tatsuya #akashi seijuro #Reo Mibuchi #Kotarō Hayama #Eikichi Nebuya #Chihiro Mayuzumi #sakurai ryou #imayoshi shouichi #hyuuga junpei #teppei kiyoshi #aida riko #satsuki momoi #mitobe rinnosuke #nijimura shuuzou #anime thoughts #winter 2020 #rens ruminations

[damerondala]

Bad Batch + Their Favorite Music

y’all i love the bad batch and you know what else i love? music. so let’s do some headcanons about what I think the bad batch’s favorite music and artists are:) 

EDIT: i decided to add spotify links to the specific artists/albums/songs i mentioned in this post so it’s easier for you guys to maybe experience some new things to listen to! please let me know if any of the links aren’t working! 

enjoy, my fellow feral, crazy, clone bitches <3

✧·ﾟ: *✧·ﾟ:* *:·ﾟ✧*:·ﾟ✧

hunter:

i know we see our hot rambo cosplayer and immediately think he’d listen to metallica or some shit and while that is true, i also think hunter really enjoys some good 70s funk or even soul

like some parliament? yes pls

also hall & oats 

i will not take criticisms on this one he fucking loves those guys 

he’s definitely a springsteen man i mean just look at him 

also likes soundgarden! loves chris cornell’s voice it just makes him feel ALIVE but he can only take so much of it tbh 

absolutely ADORES linda ronstadt 

and aretha franklin 

he and wrecker definitely do not listen to aretha when they need their soul to be cleansed and maybe cry a little 

her voice just touches the inner reaches of their souls 

sometimes he and wrecker sit down in the cockpit with a good bottle of hooch and (you make me feel) like a natural woman is just bLASTING. everybody else knows to just let them get their emotions out and avoids the cockpit so they don’t have to listen to wrecker’s crying lol

crosshair:

cross really enjoys some toadies

kind of the guy who likes obscure bands but he doesn’t do it to be a hipster it’s just genuinely what he likes 

so in conclusion: crosshair is just cool lmao 

and royal blood!! he loves the fact that they’re a two piece it kind of reminds him of he and hunter aw softie who listens to hard rock 

can also get down with some helmet or filter too and L7 for sure!

LOVES black sabbath!!!!!!!! 

but also gets in moods where he only wants to listen to slower, singer/songwriter stuff

he and tech listen to some mac demarco from time to time. maybe some lord huron too 

tech:

TALKING HEADS TALKING HEADS TALKING HEADS 

not tech loving talking heads being the sole reason i made this entire post

like speaking in tongues is his favorite album of all time its so cute 

anyways 

L O V E S bowie!!!! he just exudes bowie energy to me 

i also see him enjoying some heavier stuff too? he honestly wouldn’t mind if hunter and crosshair put some soundgarden on the marauder’s speakers 

he likes gorillaz too!! sometimes when he and echo are ~scheming~ and coming up with battle plans they’ll throw on demon days and listen to it softly while they come up with stuff or tinker with a new holopad tech found 

also likes john mayer lol what a cutie 

i honestly cannot believe i forgot to mention this earlier but tech is a h u g e rush fan

he literally considers their lyrics as poetry as he fucking should

he and hunter are in agreement that they’re one of the greatest bands of all time aw big bro and little bro finding a band they both love 

wrecker:

my sweet man. the love of my life. wrecker ADORES dolly parton

he honestly likes country but he calls it *quality* country

so think dolly, johnny cash, willie nelson, john denver etc. etc.

also likes rap 

his favorites are megan thee stallion, ice cube, and biggie

is a dmx stan 

rip dmx im still sad about that one and so is wrecker

he is honestly all over the place

one time his playlist was on shuffle and get this it literally went from dolly to dmx to john denver to doja cat and ending with aretha franklin

everybody is honestly confused but it just works when you think about how wrecker’s personality is 

he is so sweet he will listen to anything at least once 

even if he doesn’t like his vod’s music he will endure without much protest because he knows it makes them happy 

echo:

echo loves some pearl jam!!!! he likes how their earlier stuff has some that grungy sound but also how their newer stuff can get kind of experimental? 

he listened to black on repeat the first time he had his heartbroken

he thinks it kind of reflects his life journey its adorable i wanna hug him 

i could also see him liking gorillaz!! kind of that same experimental stuff 

he and tech definitely bond over that one 

mitski mitski mitski!!!!! he loves her sm 

y’all gotta remember he was best friends with fives 

so, naturally, he loves abba 

he and hunter like to have listening sessions where they share their music for sure:)))) its one of the first ways he feels really included into clone force 99 

bonus:

they all love britney spears but none of them utter a word about it so none of them know that they all love her

its tragic tbh 

they would KILL IT with an entire dance routine to toxic if they only admitted how much they love the queen  

#if i can think of any more expect them to be added in lol #my writing #bad batch headcanons #bad batch #the bad batch #the bad batch hunter #the bad batch crosshair #the bad batch tech #the bad batch wrecker #the bad batch echo #star wars #star wars headcanons #hunter #crosshair #echo #tech #wrecker

[fruitydiaz-archived]

nothing safe is worth the drive

post 4.12 treasure hunt fic that i forgot i was working on

set after taylor turns buck down outside bobby and athena's

insecure buck | soft eddie | love confessions

6,513 words

AO3 link

Buck felt like he was floating.

And not in a good way. It felt like he was floating in a way that he hadn’t felt in a while. He felt listless, aimless, purposeless. Therapy was supposed to be helping him, he was supposed to be sorting through this — this thing that he had, this issue with abandonment, this need for everyone around him to constantly reassure him that they wanted him around.

The real problem was that this abandonment thing wasn’t just a single loose thread that Buck just had to untangle and then set right. It was a million little threads all knotted together, threads from his past relationships, threads from his family, threads from his friends, threads from work, twisting and weaving together into this suffocating blanket of shame. He wanted to be needed, wanted to be loved. He wanted it so badly that it made him feel sick, made bitterness creep up the back of his tongue, made his skin itch.

Every session he had with his therapist felt like a battle.

He wanted love but he hated that he wanted it. He wanted to be self-sufficient but he was lonely — he wasn’t strong enough. He wanted something meaningful but he never felt like he could trust it. He never felt like anything was enough — because he never felt like he was enough.

He was supposed to be getting somewhere, he was supposed to be making progress, but lately he’s been falling into the same old thought patterns he was supposed to have left behind with Buck 1.0 and 2.0.

Supposed, supposed, supposed.

Have patience with yourself, Evan. Show yourself the same compassion you’d show a friend.

These things take time.

Have you ever thought maybe you just need to be patient, wait for the universe to come to you?

The thing was — he knew Taylor just saw him as a friend. He knew every time he looked at her, every time Eddie joked about her being his girlfriend — he knew it wasn’t right. But he wanted it to be right.

They already knew each other, they had history. They already knew they had incredible sex together. So the only thing they needed now was the love. And he thought that they could work at it, maybe. He thought that over time, the more that they built on their friendship, the closer they would get to crossing that line into something meaningful.

But it wasn’t right. She didn’t like him that way and, honestly, he didn’t know why he kept trying to push it. Everytime he leaned in, everytime he let his eyes soften and linger, there was a voice in the back of his head screaming at him that it was wrong. But he wanted to ignore it.

Because he wanted it to work. He wanted it to be her. Because he didn’t have any other option.

They’re on the front porch at Bobby and Athena’s and he’s trying — he’s trying, again. It should be easy, he does love Taylor, maybe just not in the way he thinks he’s supposed to, but he can pretend. He can pretend that the pounding of his heart in his chest is excitement, pretend that the way his stomach is twisting is because of butterflies, can pretend the reason his hands shake and his palms sweat is because he wants her that bad.

But he doesn’t. He doesn’t. He just wants love.

“I’m glad that we’re friends,” She says, smiling up at him. She knows what he’s trying, and she knows why he’s trying it — she’s called him out on it before.

That’s not what I meant, when I said you should wait for the universe, Buck. You know that.

But he really wishes that it would just work. That things would just fall into place like they do in the movies, that some switch would flip and he’d get what he wanted. But this...this isn’t really what he wants. And he supposes, that’s why it’s not working.

When he heads back into the house, there’s a cloud over him. He can feel it and everyone else clearly picks up on it, with the way their eyes all fall on him, then shift to Taylor, then back at him, then soften with a false sense of understanding.

They don’t get it. Nobody does.

He knows he’s doing that thing he does, where his face hardens, and he stares off into space, absorbed in thought and mentally checking out of the conversation. Eventually, everyone stops nudging him, stops trying to get him to check back in. But Eddie keeps his eyes on him.

Eddie.

Eventually, the crew begins to clear out. Taylor leaves first, of course, thanking Athena and Bobby for hosting, waving a quick goodbye for everyone else, walking briskly out the front door, phone in hand, always with a purpose.

Buck can’t tell if he’s sad to see her go or happy. Her friendship has been something like an anchor for him over the last couple of months — but he keeps trying to turn it into something it's not and the rejection he always knew would come is stinging more than it should.

Her presence is starting to feel like a constant reminder of all the ways he’s failing right now, which isn’t really fair to her.

Eddie and Buck hang back after Hen and Chimney leave, insisting on helping Bobby and Athena clean up a little. He’s not sure why they both linger. It feels oddly domestic, the two of them collecting silverware from a kitchen table that’s not either of theirs — it reminds him of the way Chimney and Maddie will linger in his apartment kitchen after dinner, clearing up and giggling to each other, Buck sitting stunned at his own kitchen table, feeling like an outsider in his own apartment.

They don’t talk much as they help — because Buck’s still brewing under his dark cloud of self-doubt. But Eddie’s nothing if not persistent.

He comes around to Buck’s side of the table and Buck glances at him, hands freezing as he reaches for another fork. Eddie doesn’t look at him, though, so Buck continues what he was doing, a little more on edge now. Their fingers brush once when they reach for the same bowl and Buck shocks the both of them with how quickly he rips his hand away. Eddie studies him for a second and Buck keeps his eyes trained on the table.

Buck doesn’t know what Eddie finds when he looks at him, but he must find something, because he sets his collection of dishes and silverware back down on the table and turns to face Buck, one hand on his hip with a sense of determination. He can practically see the way Eddie’s turning over words in his head, trying to figure out the right thing to say, so he braces himself.

“Why don’t you come over after this?” He asks, his voice gentle. Buck wants to ignore him, wants to finish clearing the table, say goodbye to Athena and Bobby, and leave — go back to his quiet apartment, bury himself under the blankets in his bed, and let his anger and hurt simmer.

But also — God, does he want to go to Eddie’s. He so badly wants to go to Eddie’s and soak up all of the gentle attention he knows Eddie wants to give him right now.

But also — he knows exactly how much that attention is going to hurt when he has to leave, when they have to cap off this week of brief fun and excitement and go back to reality — where Eddie’s with Ana and Buck is alone.

He doesn’t look at Eddie when he speaks, tries to force a casual smile onto his face but he knows it looks more like a grimace.

“What, you haven’t had enough of me yet?” He laughs, aiming for a joke, but he knows exactly how it lands; it’s pitiful and self-deprecating, a thinly veiled challenge. Eddie doesn’t blink, doesn’t smile, doesn’t frown. He just stares, steadily. Buck can feel the facade crumbling under the weight of it.

“Look, Chris is spending the day with Pepa and I don’t have to pick him up until later tonight. If you’re still around, I know he’d like to see you. He misses you.”

It’s a cheap shot, throwing Christopher at him like that. Eddie knows he’d do anything for that kid. And, to be honest, Buck misses him too, fiercely. It’s not exactly like they’ve been spending a lot of time together.

But he’s stubborn, so Buck keeps his eyes on the table, and doesn’t say anything.

After a moment, Eddie adds quieter, “I want you to come over, Buck.”

And Buck feels it all fall apart, right then. Because that’s exactly what he wants, isn’t it? To be wanted. To be wanted by Eddie.

Buck wants to think that he’s good at hiding it, wants to pretend that this burning desire he has to be the center of Eddie’s entire world isn’t written all over his face every damn day. But he knows it is — he’s never been good at hiding his emotions. His sister’s called him out on it, Hen has made gentle, quiet comments about it, and even Taylor saw right through his weak advances, saw them for what they were — a distraction.

The fact that he can’t get a grip, can’t put a fucking lid on this boiling hot need of his, is embarrassing. And he hates that Eddie apparently sees it too. Because of course, Eddie knows that Christopher isn’t his only weakness. The kid gets it from his dad. Buck’s weak for the both of them.

He doesn’t trust himself to speak, not with all of the emotions building up in his throat, so he looks at Eddie out of the corner of his eye, and nods quickly.

The smile Eddie gives him nearly knocks him back off his feet.

A few minutes later, they’re saying goodbye to Athena and Bobby. Well, more like Athena is kind-heartedly herding them out of the kitchen and out the door. Bobby says bye to them in the doorway, pulling each of them into a hug that surprises them both. Buck’s pretty sure that Bobby holds onto him just a second longer, squeezing him tighter, and clapping him on the back with a force that hides some kind of message.

I love you, kid is probably what he’s saying. Buck wants to swallow his tongue.

If he wanted to dig into himself and figure out exactly why he finds it hard to accept that the love from his co-workers — who are like his family — is enough, which his therapist actively encourages him to do, he would probably find that it’s because he believes that these are overwhelmingly good people. These are the people whose hands he willingly places his life into every single day, because he knows they’ll take care of it. They’re people that he looks up to every day, follows their lead whenever he feels lost, takes after them to better himself. And the thing that life has taught him about people like them, is that eventually they see him for what he is, and it’s never enough.

He fights every day not to feel like a fraud in that firehouse. He fights every day to earn his spot — even though everyone keeps telling him he doesn’t have to.

Old habits die hard, they say.

He climbs into Eddie’s truck — he had insisted on picking Buck up for lunch, since Buck drove them to dig for treasure — and feels the cloud over him start to dissipate, just a bit, in the familiar space. Part of him wants to reach out, grab hold of it, and yank it back into place. It’s that stubbornness of his that likes to hold onto the bad feelings, because they always feel safer than hope.

For the first 10 minutes of their drive, they don’t speak, just listen to the sounds of the radio. It’s peaceful, and as they drive Buck feels the cloud of his start to disappear. When he tilts his head back and closes his eyes, he can pretend that he doesn’t want it to stay, and he can start to let it go.

His feelings around Eddie are confusing, especially lately. He knows how he feels about Eddie, though, admittedly, he’s scared to say it out loud. When you voice something like that, give it a name, it makes it more real. Before, it was easy to ignore. Eddie was his best friend, Eddie was his partner, Eddie had his back, Eddie wasn’t going anywhere. He was content to keep that unnamed emotion under wraps for the sake of their friendship. Things were good — why would he want to risk it? Anytime he’s loved someone openly, they’ve left him. He wasn’t going to let Eddie leave him.

But now there’s Ana. And Buck doesn’t want to keep that emotion locked up anymore — not with the way it’s eating away at him. He wants to let it out, let it consume him, and maybe consume Eddie too. But that’s not an option. He can’t love Eddie, precisely because he loves him. He can’t risk losing him any more than he already has.

So he can’t let himself get too comfortable, can’t settle back into that spot he’s had reserved for the last 3 years. Because comfort leads to slip-ups; comfort leads to revealing things he shouldn’t. When they were both tiptoeing around their emotions — that was fine. Buck would slip up, then Eddie would slip up, then both of them would pretend they had no idea what they were dancing around.

Or, at least, that’s how he thought things were going. But, apparently, Eddie had enough of that dance and found someone that was actually worthwhile. Buck desperately wishes he could find someone too, but apparently the only one worthwhile for him — is Eddie.

Buck knows his peace can’t last forever so he’s not surprised when Eddie eventually turns down the radio. He’s been tapping his fingers against the steering wheel anxiously ever since they got in the car. Buck knew he was dying to start probing him with questions — in the most gentle, caring, Eddie way possible.

“Want to tell me what’s bugging you?” Eddie flicks his blinker on, eyes trained on the road, and he asks the question with such an air of nonchalance that Buck almost believes him.

“No,” He says flatly, shifting in his seat. The corners of Eddie’s lips quirk up in a smile, and he hates the fondness that creeps up in him at it. He fights to keep a smile off his own lips — he’s frustrated right now.

“Anything to do with that private conversation you had with your girlfriend out on the front porch?” Eddie asks...and...there’s an edge to his voice. That edge that’s been there every time that Eddie’s brought up Taylor — like he can’t let Buck have one thing. It cuts right through him, and he snaps, just a little. He sits up straighter in his seat and stares at Eddie. He can feel the heat rising in him — the anger, the want — getting twisted in his chest.

His face burns.

“She’s not my girlfriend,” He bites. He’s got more venom in him than he expects, the baritone of his lower register rumbling beneath the surface. It surprises Eddie, enough that the smile falls off his face, and he turns to actually look at Buck.

Buck knows his mask is all but wiped away — he’s clear as day to Eddie, his emotions all there on the surface, for Eddie to see.

He doesn’t say anything for a moment, letting the anger bubbling in Buck die back down a little bit, and turns into his neighborhood. Buck feels himself relax again and guilt starts to settle in, in place of the anger that’s slowly fading. He opens his mouth like he wants to say something, apologize, maybe, for snapping — but nothing comes out.

“Do you want her to be?” Eddie cuts in, interrupting whatever unnecessary apology Buck was trying to work out. He deflates against his seat and looks down at his lap. Yes, is what he wants to say. But it’s not really the truth. And as much of a fight as he’s been putting up — he’s really fucking tired. Fighting against Eddie’s not worth it, and he never likes it.

“I don’t know,” Buck says honestly, quietly. His voice sounds smaller than he’d like and he rubs a hand over his face, embarrassed. “I’m tired of being alone, Eddie.”

His voice breaks, and it hurts, and it’s humiliating, but it’s the truth, ugly as it is. Eddie nods, like he understands, which he doesn’t. Buck wants to scream, just a little.

“You’re not alone, Buck.” Eddie turns onto his street and slows down, taking the chance to look over at Buck, slumped down in his seat. He watches Buck roll his eyes, watches his eyebrows jump up and his head tilt like he’s ready to brush Eddie off. “You don’t have to be in a relationship, you know? You can just be Buck.”

“No offense, Eddie, but I’m tired of hearing shit like that from people who don’t get it.”

There’s a pause.

“I don’t get it?”

“No.” Buck’s getting short with him again, so Eddie doesn’t say anything in response. He waits, counts to five, lets his breath even out. He’s not looking for a fight — but that seems to be Buck’s default, right now, and that’s not how tonight’s going to go.

He parks in the driveaway and cuts the engine off, letting the silence settle over them.

“What don’t I get?” Eddie tries again, once he sees that Buck’s backed down a bit.

“It’s not the same for us, Eddie. It’s not the same for any of you. Everybody has someone. Maddie, Chimney, Hen, Bobby, Athena...you. Hell, even Albert had Veronica. I don’t have anyone.”

They stare at each other for a beat, before Buck breaks their eye contact and looks back out the window. His jaw locks like he’s not going to say anything else, and Eddie waits.

He turns his keys over in his hand and drops his head down. He doesn’t understand Buck’s need for a relationship — that much is true. He’s been on about this for months now, probably as long as Eddie’s been seeing Ana. Or — was — seeing Ana. That’s ended now...and he hasn’t really found the right opportunity to bring it up.

Eddie sighs and slips his keys into his pocket.

“Look — you’re right. I don’t know why you want to be in a relationship so bad. You don’t have to put all of your self-worth into someone else’s hands. You’re enough on your own, Buck.”

Buck still doesn’t look at him but Eddie can see the telltale working of Buck’s jaw, the way he clenches it and unclenches it whenever he’s trying to fight back some wave of emotions. He tries to sniff subtly, but Eddie’s watching him like a hawk.

“And, uh, besides, I’m...Ana and I broke up. A while ago, actually.”

Buck’s neck snaps as he turns to look at him, surprise all over his face. Eddie shrugs a little, cocks his head to the side, and smiles, shy.

“Wh — what? What do you mean?” Eddie shrugs again.

“We...we just ended things, man, I don’t know?” The look Buck gives him is entirely unimpressed and it almost makes him laugh.

“I don’t know? Eddie. How did I not know about this?” And — Eddie knows Buck. He can pick apart the layers of anything Buck says in an instance; the fake lightness in his voice, the question hiding another question, the underlying layer of hurt.

How did I not know?

How did you not tell me?

Eddie rubs his jaw with his hand before shaking his head and pushing his side door open.

“Come on, Buck. We’re not having this conversation in the car. We’ll end up here all night.” He jumps out, then turns around, leaning against the frame of the car and looking at Buck expectantly.

Buck stares at him a couple seconds longer, brain still struggling to catch up with him. He looks like he wants to argue. Against what, Eddie’s not really sure, and he’s pretty sure Buck isn’t either.

Wordlessly, he unclasps his seatbelt and slides out his side of the truck. Eddie counts that as a win.

They head into the house in silence, Buck walking straight to the kitchen to grab them some beers while Eddie flicks on the lights and does a general scope around the house, just to feel settled.

When he walks back to the kitchen, Buck’s shoes are off — he left them by the door, next to the pile of Eddie’s and Christopher’s — and he’s hoisted himself up onto the counter by the sink. Eddie’s body warms, the way it does whenever he sees Buck comfortable in his home. He stopped trying to analyze the feeling a long time ago — just accepted that Buck was a part of his home now and when he wasn’t there — it didn’t feel complete.

Buck’s got one bottle of beer in his hands, another uncapped on the counter next to him. Eddie smiles as he walks over to Buck, drifting into his orbit to grab the bottle. They tap their bottles together in a wordless cheer, a habit of theirs they can’t ever break, even with tension sitting heavy between them, and Eddie leans back against the kitchen table as he takes his first sip.

They drink in silence and Eddie can feel the way Buck’s holding himself back, the way he’s refusing to broach the subject before Eddie does. He takes another sip of his beer and sighs, holding it down in his lap, and fiddling with the cap.

“I didn’t tell you because I wasn’t ready. It wasn’t like there was a big problem between me and Ana...it just wasn’t working,” He glances at Buck, who’s watching him with that look in his eyes; the one that always makes Eddie feel pinned in place, grounded in a way that few things do, like he’s the only person in the world. He shifts.

“We both agreed to end things...together. But I still needed some time, you know, to think about...things,” Eddie drops his gaze back down to the bottle in his lap. He pauses, taking the opportunity to take another sip of beer.

He hadn’t been planning to have this conversation with Buck for a while. That’s exactly why he didn’t tell him that they had broken up in the first place. Because somewhere between introducing Ana to Christopher and the last couple of months — Eddie had come to a startling realization.

The moment it hit him was nothing, really. It was a quiet moment. One day his Abuela had stopped by the station to drop Christopher off at the end of Eddie’s shift and Eddie was still in the locker room. He came out to find Chris and Buck talking by the truck. Christopher had just pulled out his latest art project to show Buck and Buck was on his knees beside him, staring at the piece of paper like it was a genuine work of art. He asked serious questions about the subject matter, the colors Chris had chosen — and Chris eagerly answered all of them, laughing when he thought Buck asked a silly question, and Buck would fein offended and then burst out laughing with him.

It was so ordinary, so normal for them, that Eddie didn’t even pause when his heart warmed at the sight or when that fond smile made its way onto his face or when he squeezed Buck’s shoulder as they said goodbye. He didn’t realize until he had made the whole drive home, ate dinner, helped Chris with his homework, put him to bed, and then settled in under the covers that night. Then it hit him all at once.

He was in love with Buck. He wanted to see Buck every day, wanted to wake up in the morning and come into the kitchen to find Buck doing something entirely mundane like drinking coffee, or eating breakfast, talking with Chris about anything and everything while he sat at the table eating cereal. He wanted Buck to come home with him after a shift and sit down at the table with them while they ate dinner and talked about their days. He wanted Buck there for movie nights and beers and birthday parties and bedtime stories and sleepovers and — everything.

So he broke up with Ana. And he spent the last month and a half trying to figure out exactly how to move forward from there because he was pretty sure that Buck loved him too.

But now there’s been all this time and space between where they once were and where they were now — a weird distance between them, a chasm that seemed impossible to cross. And every time Eddie tried to reach out he was met with resistance — because Buck was clearly trying to make something work with Taylor.

Why? Eddie didn’t understand. They seemed friendly with each other, and Eddie tried not to let his jealousy eat away at him, fought hard not to listen to that voice in the back of his head that screamed that he lost his chance, that he’d been replaced. But Taylor was clearly disinterested in pursuing anything else with Buck. And from where Eddie sat? Buck sure kept trying, but his heart didn’t really seem to be in it.

So — it was confusing. And the more time went by, the less Eddie really knew what to do.

And now they’re here.

“Look — nobody knows, except, you know, Christopher...and Abuela, Pepa, my mom, my dad, my sisters — you know,” He waves his hand, dismissively. “But nobody from work knows. You’re...you’re the first one I’ve told...because I want to tell you.”

He doesn’t miss the pleased look that passes over Buck’s face before he forces it down into something slightly more neutral. He stalls, taking another sip from his beer. He looks like he wants to say a couple of different things, or a million different things — Eddie wouldn’t know — but he settles for the easiest.

“How long?”

Eddie sucks in a sharp breath and presses his lips together.

“Month and a half.” And there it is, that unimpressed look, again.

“Eddie—” Eddie holds up his hands in defense.

“I know, I know, okay. It’s been a while. I told you, I had...some things to think about.” That’s as vague as he can be. He’s not really sure that now’s the time to say I was trying to figure out how to tell you I love you. Buck blinks, waiting for Eddie to elaborate. When he doesn’t, he rolls his eyes.

“Eddie — a month? What was there to think about, you had already broken up,” Buck’s tone is exasperated but he’s not angry — not like he was an hour ago. Eddie chews on his lip, looking back down at the bottle in his hands and picking at the wrapper on it.

“I had to think about what I wanted,” He says quietly. When he looks back at Buck — he sees the confusion. But Buck stays quiet, eyes flicking over Eddie’s face. They stay like that, suspended in the moment, for a while, before Eddie speaks again.

“What do you want, Buck? Is it Taylor Kelly?”

He’s not sure what gives him the confidence to ask that, to turn the conversation back around on Buck. He tries to keep his voice level when he says Taylor’s name; he’s perfectly aware of how his voice turns to something twisted and bitter whenever he talks about her. She doesn’t deserve it, not really, but he can’t help it. He tries his best.

Buck keeps his eyes locked with Eddie’s and they narrow a little, like he’s trying to figure out Eddie’s play, flipping the switch on him like that. Eventually, he drops his gaze and does a confusing series of tiny head nods and shakes. He squeezes his eyes shut.

“I don’t know — no. Not really.” Eddie nods. He repeats his question.

“What do you want, Buck?”

Buck doesn’t say anything, not at first. He’s distinctly thinking that he’s not drunk enough for this conversation. He’s not drunk at all — he’s barely had half of his beer. He’s not nearly as loose as he’d like to be for this — not nearly as loose as he needs to be for this. But he wants to be honest with Eddie, wants to save this intimate moment, wants to cherish the closeness. This is what his therapist encourages him to do, take the opportunity to open up, not to hide away in the things he thinks are most comfortable, not to shy away from the vulnerability that scares him, to embrace it, and be honest and real.

“I want...someone to come home to,” He starts, and his voice cracks on the word home, but he powers through, even if he has to take another large gulp of beer before continuing. “I...want someone who...will see everything that I have to offer and...it — it will be enough.”

I want you. I want you. Can I be enough for you?

Buck falls quiet again and Eddie takes the risk, stepping forward into the space between Buck’s legs. They weren’t far apart to begin with, the space between the counter and the table isn’t that great, but now Eddie’s breathing his air. Buck chances a look up at him.

“Do you know what I want?” Eddie asks, eyes steady on Buck. He doesn’t dare to breathe. “I want someone that I can count on. Someone who...won’t be scared by all of the parts of me that are broken. Someone who will look at Christopher — and see him the way I see him, the way he is, a kid with so much light and love in him. Someone who won’t just see his limitations — but all of the possibilities of things that he can do. Someone who will love him and support him and never leave his side.”

Buck’s eyes are big and watery and he jumps to fill Eddie’s silence.

“Eddie, no part of you is broken. And Chris — Chris is an amazing kid. It’s impossible not to love him. Anyone who gets to be a part of your lives is lucky.”

And — of course. Of course, that’s how Buck responds. Of course, Buck skips over the quiet declaration, the subtle implications that it’s him, it’s him, it’s him — to reassure Eddie in a way that just proves that he’s everything he could ever want. Eddie nods, rests his fingertips on the counter, just on the outside of Buck’s thighs. His voice drops into a softness he rarely indulges in, a tone he saves just for the people he loves.

“I want someone who will have my back.” He watches the way Buck’s eyes widen, the way he freezes at the words. His eyes jump back and forth between Eddie’s and his mouth drops open, just a bit. Eddie continues.

“I want someone...that I can count on...and that I know, no matter what, they will always have my back.”

The silence in the room is borderline oppressive — the way Eddie can feel it surrounding them, enveloping them like a weighted blanket. He struggles to breathe as he stares back at Buck, waiting. They’ve been playing this game all night. One moves, the other waits, then they move, and the other waits. It’s Buck’s turn to make the move. Eddie doesn’t want to push him — but all his cards are on the table.

“Eddie,” Buck breathes, but nothing else follows. He’s frozen in place on the counter and Eddie knows what’s running through his mind.

It’s fear. It’s fear clawing its way up Buck’s chest, fear pressing down steady on his lungs, suffocating him. It’s fear that has every fiber of his body locked in place — unrelenting.

Buck is one of the bravest people Eddie’s ever met — and he’s met a lot of brave people. He throws himself headfirst into danger every day of his life for the lives of others. He would lay his life down on the line for anyone, no matter who, no matter what, no matter when. And he loves — he loves so fiercely, so bravely, so willingly, despite every way in which he’s been hurt before.

He’s brave not because he doesn’t feel fear — he feels it constantly, but he lives in spite of it, loves in spite of it, fights in spite of it. All Eddie wants is for him to feel safe in this, to know it's real and that he can love and not be afraid of it.

He takes another calculated risk, and lifts one of his hands from the counter, settling it gently on Buck’s thigh. He jumps, slightly, at the contact but doesn’t move away or go to remove Eddie’s hand. He swallows.

“Evan, I want you.”

And Buck can’t hold it back anymore — the fear, the want, the anger, the love. It comes bursting out of him at once. His face twists up as the emotions rush over him, and he wants to just shut his eyes, block it all out, not let them ruin this moment — but he can’t. The next thing he knows, he’s crying, breaking down sobbing in the middle of Eddie’s kitchen at the simple admission that somebody — not just somebody but Eddie — wants him.

It’s too good to be true. It has to be.

“Eddie,” Buck tries again, struggling to keep back tears. He gives Eddie that look, the one that says you don’t know what you’re talking about — I don’t believe you, and Eddie’s heart breaks.

He reaches his hands up and gently cradles Buck’s face between them; he can’t hold himself back from touching him, not anymore. Using his thumbs to wipe at Buck’s tears, he moves so that they’re eye to eye and Buck can’t look away from him.

“I love you, Buck.” And he can’t bring himself to care about the fact that it might be too soon to say it — because he’s been in love with Buck for years and in their line of work anything can happen to them at any time. If life has taught him one thing it’s that we never know when we’re going to go. And if anything were to ever happen to them and Eddie hadn’t grown the fuck up and taken the opportunity to tell Buck, this man who radiates light like the sun, who’s filled to the brim with love, who wants to give it to anyone and everyone who will accept it, who deserves love honestly returned — he doesn’t even want to think about it.

So he tells him, and he means it, and he needs Buck to know that he means it.

Buck’s face crumples on itself again. Eddie gives him a second to let more tears fall, watches as the muscles in his face move, trying to work out a response.

“Eddie,” Seems to be all he can say. He tries again.

“Buck — what do you want?”

He pauses and the tears keep streaming down his face but then he looks at Eddie, wide-eyed, and Eddie sees it — the moment that it clicks for Buck. The moment he realizes that this is real and if he wants it he can have it.

“You.”

Eddie nods, trying to keep himself from breaking down crying too, but he’s not sure it’s possible. They’re both exhausted, running on the carbs and coffee from Bobby and Athena’s and little to no sleep. But he’s grateful for anything that got them here, finally.

“You have me,” Eddie says, and he means it. “Me, Christopher, we’re yours, Buck. You’ve always had us.”

“Eddie,” Buck sobs and he’s clinging to Eddie’s shirt like it’s a lifeline. “I love you. And I love Chris. And I can’t lose you, not again, I can’t—“

“You never lost us, Buck,” Eddie shushes, pressing a solid kiss to his forehead. “Never. You might have, you know, been a dumbass once or twice. But we’ve both made mistakes. And here we are.”

Buck nods and looks around, blinking like he just realized where they were. He looks back at Eddie, eyes red from tears but a soft smile on his face nonetheless.

“You know, I’ve always wanted to make out with you on this counter.”

And — it’s tame, by his standards and Buck’s, he’s well aware of that — but something about that admission leaves him winded. He’s too startled to even respond for a second before he breaks out laughing.

It’s an effective tension cutter, and Buck laughs too.

“Really?” Eddie chuckles, letting his head drop so he can stop staring into Buck’s eyes for five seconds and breathe.

“Oh yeah,” Buck says, sniffling. He slides his hands up Eddie’s arms. “Here, and on your couch, against the wall...in your bed.”

He tacks the last part on with a kind of shyness that Eddie’s not used to hearing in Buck’s voice — especially not when it comes to sex. He looks back up again to find Buck’s eyes on him, still a little guarded and unsure.

He recognizes that a simple declaration of love isn’t enough to wash away Buck’s self-doubt — it’s not enough to fix either of them. But they’ll work on it together.

Eddie swipes his thumb across Buck’s cheekbone.

“We can do all of that, Evan,” He promises, smiling at the gentle gasp that leaves Buck at the sound of his given name.

“You know, I normally don’t like it when people call me Evan,” Buck says, dropping his hands to Eddie’s waist and letting his fingers dip under his shirt, feather-light against his skin. “But there’s something about the way you say it.”

Eddie hums in acknowledgment, bumping Buck’s nose with his and pressing gentle kisses along his jawline. Buck sighs and shrugs one shoulder.

“I dunno. It makes me feel good.”

Eddie pulls back again, eyes shining, and he smiles at Buck.

“I always want to make you feel good,” He says, and Buck tilts his head to the side, face flushing as the sweetest smile grows on his lips.

Eddie closes the space between them and presses his lips against Buck’s — gentle, at first, like a promise to keep him safe.

They kiss in the kitchen for a while, their hands lightly traveling over their arms, their backs, their chests, their thighs — a sweet exploration of something familiar and new all at once.

They kiss until they get lightheaded and Buck starts to feel like he’s floating again.

But it’s different this time, better — because they’re doing it together.

#funny how i simply cannot stop writing about them #911 fox #buddie #writing #al talks

[libsterslobsters]

Whole Lotta Love

Synopsis: For some people, Valentine’s Day is another word for "stress", especially when you don't know what the other person is expecting. Several years into their relationship, Bucky’s pretty sure he has a good understanding of the Reader, until a word from Sam makes him question everything he thinks he knows. The race is on to make their first Valentine’s Day since saying their vows a special one, but as per usual, fate has it's own ideas about what will make the holiday truly memorable

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Fem! Enhanced! Super-soldier Reader

(Reader can see bits and pieces of the future in visions as well as speak every language)

Warnings: Smut, Fluff

Author's note: This fic contains references to earlier stories. For more information, click the series masterlist link. As always, the reader is unnamed so that this can be read as a self-insert, but at this point, I think of her as an OC.

The song referenced is Hearts Don't Break Around Here by Ed Sheeran

Series Masterlist

A The Song Remains The Same Fic

---------‐-----------------------------------

“So, Valentine’s Day.”

Bucky doesn’t look up from his laptop (or more specifically, the field report he’s typing) at Sam’s words. Despite his concentration, he can tell that his partner is staring at him, boring holes into his back with his gaze.

“Uh-huh.” He’s listening, but so far, he doesn’t care.

“What are you doing for it?” For Valentine’s day? Um…

“Not much.” It’s a Tuesday this year, right? Then probably working, like most other people, he’d imagine.

The room is silent as he types, so Bucky assumes that settles the matter. That is, until Sam mutters a quiet, “You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me.”

“About what?” How many paragraphs does he have to type before he can pass this off as a full report? When he joined the Avengers, he thought the hardest part of his job would be the bad guy of the week, not doing paperwork!

“You’re really not doing anything for Valentine’s Day? Seriously?” He nods absentmindedly and clicks the save icon. He’ll finish this tomorrow. It’s five o’clock. Time to head home. Home to-

“What’s your wife gonna think about that?” He shrugs and cuts the power to the laptop.

“She thinks that the whole holiday is a rip-off. See you Monday?” He turns around for confirmation, only to catch Sam staring at him, mouth hanging wide open. “What?”

“A rip-off?” Is he just going to be stuck repeating himself?

“Yep.” Told him that the first February 14th they spent together.

“And you actually believed her?”

He nods. “She’s not one to lie.”

Sam nods incredulously. “Uh-huh. And are you planning to ever have sex again?”

He’s not going to dignify that with an answer (because really, isn’t it obvious?).

“Fine.” Sam shrugs. “You do you, man. All I’m saying is, if I had a wife who looked like that-” he indicates the lock screen of Bucky’s phone (a picture of her laughing, telling him to put away the damn camera after wrestling the dog for the tie to her favorite robe). “-I’d have my V-day plans set up a month in advance.”

Normally Bucky would take what Sam says with a grain of salt, but he is after all a man out of time, so maybe it’s worth considering that his partner may be right.

“What would you suggest I do?”

“Outside of the bedroom?” He narrows his eyes at the Falcon. “Okay, bad joke.” Sam scratches at the back of his head, thinking. “I don’t know, man. That’s your girl. You know her best, but flowers are always a good place to start.” Good to know that hasn’t changed since the 1940s. Although, last time he brought her flowers, she spent the afternoon sneezing until he eventually convinced her that it was okay, he wouldn’t be offended, she should throw the damn things out. Then again, that was before she was a super soldier.

“Flowers.” He repeats, earning a nod from Sam.

“You can get creative. Do a little research. But I’m just saying, when a woman waits five years for you to reappear, the least she deserves is a few flowers.” On that, they can agree.

He must bid Sam some sort of goodbye and make his way through the Avengers compound, but he’s unaware of anything until he’s in the parking lot, sitting behind the wheel of his car, googling “What to do for your wife on Valentine’s Day.” There’s a web page that boasts twenty different selections. Might as well give it a look.

___________________________________________________________________________________

She’s nearly home when her phone dings with a text from Barnes. “Just got in. Forgot to get milk. Can you swing by on your way, or should I go to the gas station and pick up a gallon?” A frown forms on her face. It’s pretty rare that Bucky forgets things. Must’ve been a hell of a day at work, then. Either that, or his brain has completely turned to mush thanks to typing out field reports. Either way-

“I got it. See you in twenty.” She thinks about tacking on a “love you”, but the light turns green before she can.

The grocery store is packed thanks to so many people getting off work. There’s only three carts left, all with bad wheels. She chooses the least squeaky option and, grabbing an add on her way, heads into the grocery store. Milk, and if she remembers right from this morning, they’re running dangerously low on coffee and tea. Despite caffeine having absolutely no effect on their enhanced bodies, both of them are nightmares to be around in the mornings without their beverages of choice. Force of habit and all.

She’s halfway to the checkout when she sees it. A sign, decorated in garish shades of red, pink, and purple. “All Valentine’s Day chocolates 10% off.” Shit. Yeah, that is coming up. To tell the truth, she’d completely forgot all about that day halfway through February. For most of her life, it only meant giving homemade cards at school when most kids had store-bought. Then, once she reached adulthood, it was a reminder that she was destined to be alone. Who would want someone who’s on the run, and what’s more, sees the future? Once she and Barnes got together, it didn’t change much. That first Valentine’s Day, he mentioned the holiday, and she shut it down immediately. They were both broke (or at least, he had no legitimate way of making money while she was broke), and celebrating a mostly commercial holiday seemed like a waste. Plus, she didn’t want to put a strain on a new relationship. Over the years, the subject never came up again, and she’s content for it to stay a non-starter, thank you very much. In her opinion, you should show your partner you love them every day of the year, not shoe-horn it into one twenty-four hour period. Call her unromantic if you must.

She’s completely immune to the various displays of cheap chocolate in heart-shaped boxes and overly sentimental cards as she approaches the register and starts to unload her items. Milk. Tea. That one specific brand of coffee that he likes because, “It tastes like what we drank in basic training. Terrible, but I kinda got used to it, so now everything else tastes like it’s trying too hard.” whatever that means. He’s right; she’s tasted it, and it’s fucking awful. Still, every morning, he drinks at least three cups while she drains her pot of tea.

“You got a hot date for Valentine’s Day, hun?” The cashier asks her, never breaking her rhythm as she rings up the items.

She chuckles. “As a matter of fact, yes.” The cashier’s eye go wide, and she holds up her left hand. “And every other day.”

“Ooh, nice. How long have you been together?”

“Nine years.” Wait… “Or four years, depending on which of us you ask. He blipped, I stayed.”

The cashier nods. “So are you older than him now?”

Physically? They’re not completely sure, but if you calculate the times he was off the ice with HYDRA and add that to the age he was before the serum, then they’re not far off. But chronologically- “No, he’s still older.” And yes, it will always be funny that Sam responds with “Okay, boomer” whenever Bucky makes an outdated reference (even if he’s off by a good twenty years).

With a little more light chatter, she pays for her items and leaves. Now, for home.

As soon as she opens the front door, she’s greeted by their dog, Sarge, barking excitedly and hopping around like he’s on a trampoline despite missing a leg. Bucky’s not far behind, placing a quick peck on her forehead before taking the bags from her and unloading them in the kitchen. Tonight’s his night to cook, but unless her nose has suddenly decided to give out, he hasn’t started dinner yet. She doesn’t mind taking over tonight, and when he sheepishly apologizes while she begins her preparations, she brushes it off. Although, for the second time in an hour, she’s seen proof of his unusual absentmindedness. Oh well. She’ll ask him about it later.

Despite being relieved from tonight’s chef duties, Bucky stays in the kitchen, sitting at the breakfast bar scrolling through his phone as she cooks. His expression is neutral, which can mean one of two things; a) he’s just killing time and there aren’t any interesting posts or articles vying for his attention, or at the opposite end of the spectrum, b) he’s deep in thought, possibly angry, sad, or even frightened, but he’s gone into Winter Soldier mode and shut down so that she won’t pick up on his mood. Damn the man and his poker face.

Eventually dinner is served and she sends him off toward the fridge in search of two beers while she serves their plates. Just as she’s spooning a generous helping of salad into her bowl, it happens. A vision, but a limited one. All she’s seeing is a phone. Well, that and the hand holding it. She’s not sure whether to be proud or embarrassed that she immediately recognizes the hand as Bucky’s, but that goes by the wayside as she takes in the article he’s reading. “Should you do something for Valentine’s Day even is she says no?” It’s a thread on some anonymous discussion board. The reply that has his attention is in reference to a now divorced individual who “was dumb enough to believe that, on our first V-Day as a married couple, she didn’t want anything.” Oh boy. Not good. This will be their first Valentine’s Day since exchanging vows, and if the fact that he’s read this reply (if not already read, will read soon) means that it’s at least crossed his radar that she might be feeding him bullshit. That’s not the case, but after his research, she knows from experience that no matter how much she tries to convince him otherwise, a small part of his mind will be stuck on, “But what if this is a big deal?” Which means-

“Doll, are you just gonna stand there with the salad tongs in your hand?” That snaps her out of it.

“No. Just a vision.” He frowns as she passes him his plate.

“Anything important happen?” Should she say?

“No.” She’s not sure if the smile or not, so she takes a bite from her roll to cover it. “Random sneak peek.” It’s not a lie. What she saw really isn’t important. Still, if he’s in that mindset, she should probably go on and do something for him just in case. After all, why should it only be the ladies who reap this holiday’s benefits?

___________________________________________________________________________________

Not flowers. That’s the one thing that, after copious amounts of research Bucky is one hundred percent certain about. They may still be a common romantic gift, but since they were also a go-to back when he was courting girls in the 1940s, it’s safe to say they’ve been overdone. Plus, he doesn’t really want to remind her of that time she had such a severe allergic reaction to the flowers he picked her on a walk through the park in Bucharest that her eyes nearly swelled shut and she sneezed herself sick. That doesn’t exactly seem like prime romance.

Chocolates or other candies have the same issues as flowers. Contrived and predictable. A bottle of wine is nice, but neither of them can so much as get mildly tipsy thanks to the super serum. The fourteenth is his day to cook, so he guesses he could do some reading and try to create something a little more special than spaghetti (he thought about going to a nice restaurant for dinner, but there’s a few issues with that, not the least of which is they’re likely to be recognized without their disguises, and he’d rather not look at his wife through sunglasses on Valentine’s day), but that seems a little underwhelming.

As he loads the dishwasher (she fell asleep half-way through the third episode of whichever nonsensical comedy they’re watching this week, so he sneaked back downstairs to clean up the dinner dishes), he thinks back to the dozen separate articles he read on the subject of Valentine’s Day gifts. Jewelry was a common theme, but that’s out. She’ll say thank you to his face, but worry about the cost behind his back. Plus, he has absolutely no idea what she’d like, and there’s no sense in purchasing something only for her to hate it.

Another common one was lingerie. Bucky almost choked on his tongue when he saw some of the examples given with that option. None of it looked comfortable (in fact, he’s still scratching his head about how you even put on one of the pieces that popped up on the web page) and he doesn’t want to give her the impression that she has to dress up for him. Even putting all that aside, he has no idea what size she’d even wear. He likes to think that he knows his wife pretty well, but somehow, in all their years together, it never occurred to him to ask her for her clothing sizes. That, and have you even seen the bra sizing system? Does it make sense to anyone, because to Bucky, it’s all gibberish. 32 B? 36 DD? What the hell? Somehow, when HYDRA was training him to extract information, they failed to go over the translation of a woman’s bra size. He supposes he could ask, but he’s not sure there’s a non-suspicious way to work, “Hey, sweetheart. What size are your breasts?” into casual conversation.

Sam said to get creative, so he tried to think outside the box. What’s something she really needs? A new vacuum cleaner is the first thing to come to mind, but he’s not stupid enough to think that would make a good gift. He knows she’s had her eye on a set of throwing stars, but that doesn’t seem to correlate well with what this holiday is all about. That’ll keep until her birthday.

He’s still wracking his brain for anything at all that might work when he feels a wet nose poking at his hand. Sarge. “Hey, boy. Has your mom gone to bed?” The response is a quiet “woof” and lick to his palm. He scratches the mutt behind the ears, smiling to himself as Sarge’s back leg thumps at the treatment.

“What do you think we should get our girl? Huh?” There’s no reply (of course not, he’s talking to a dog), but he nods, pretending all the same that Sarge has offered up a suggestion. “A bone. Yeah, somehow I don’t think that’s her thing. Try again.” The dog blinks at him lazily. “No, you’re the one who wants new tennis balls. Not Mom. Although you’re right about her liking peanut butter.” At this rate, he might as well get her a bone and some tennis balls, because he’s sure not coming up with any ideas.

She likes music. The thought pops into his head while he’s brushing his teeth. All sorts of music. Over the years, he’s tried to make sense of the songs he’s heard her listen to, but has yet to find a discernible pattern in her listening habits. She doesn’t seem to stick to just one genre or era. More like she picks songs by how they relate to what she’s feeling at the moment. Wait a second-

“A mixtape.” His reflection mouths the words back at him. Despite technology having moved on from the days of burning CDs, she still has a thick stack of the disks stored in a cabinet and plays them on the regular. He’s even seen a few that she made herself, pasting together the songs she likes to make a “Cleaning mix”, “Workout Mix” and “Pissed off Mix”. Bucky’s sure he could figure out how to burn a CD, but it’s not like she’d be able to listen to that everywhere she went. That leaves a playlist. She uses one of those apps to listen to music on her phone, right? Surely he can put something together for her using that.

Quietly, he climbs into bed next to his sleeping wife and pulls her back against his chest, slinging one arm over her waist as usual. He closes his eyes, but his mind is alight with activity. A playlist. Of course. He’ll put some extra effort into whatever he cooks that night, stop by a bakery and pick up some sweet treats for dessert. Hell, maybe they’ll both dress up and act like they’re on a date. Then, once they’re sitting down to their meal, he’ll pull out his phone and hit play. It’s perfect. At least, he hopes it is.

___________________________________________________________________________________

Putting on a lacy bra and panties set underneath her regular work attire seemed like a brilliant idea this morning. Today’s a short day; she’s only got three classes to teach, and Rhodey called last night to tell Bucky that he’s suspending work hours at three pm “Since most people have holiday preparations to make.” Her plan was to be waiting on the sofa in the living room when he arrives home, professional button-down blouse open just enough for him to get a good look at what’s underneath, pencil skirt pushed up enough to reveal the stockings and garters she’s donned for the occasion. It’s fun, with just enough cheesiness to match this whole holiday. And, well, it’s a guarantee that by the end of the night they’ll be in bed together, both rumpled, sweaty, and satisfied. Perfect, right?

Wrong. On her drive to work, her skimpy underwear began to ride up, giving her a wedgie, and there was no way to adjust without running the risk of wrecking. She was so distracted by her discomfort that she missed her exit, and by the time she arrived at the college, she was running so behind that she didn’t get the chance to run to the bathroom and readjust. Her lecture on sentence diagrams was pure torture before the underwire from her bra decided to join in the fun and poke her directly in the ribs, but with that addition, she was especially impatient with her students’ tendency to joke around a little too much in class.

Luckily, she had just enough time to wrap the exposed metal bit in tissues before her next class, which eliminated the pain in her chest, but did nothing to alleviate the discomfort once her stockings began to slide down, having at some point disconnected themselves from the garters. She taught like that for the next two classes, but as soon as they were over, she pealed the whole ensemble off in the teacher’s restroom and changed into her gym clothes. Alright, screw the whole seduction routine. She needs to blow off some steam and fast, or else she’ll be in a bad mood all night.

That’s why, thirty minutes later, she finds herself in the training room of the Avengers compound, working over a punching bag. “Fuck-” Her fist connects, making the bag swing crazily from it’s hook. “-this- whole- day!” It goes sailing, and she feels a little better.

“Ouch!” The voice comes from behind her and she whirls around, gaze resting on-

“Sam.” The man in question holds up his hands in an “I surrender” gesture.

“Don’t shoot! I come in peace.” Rolling her eyes, she holds up her middle finger, receiving a snicker in acknowledgment.

“Just working off a little frustration before I head home.”

“Good.” Sam chuckles. “’cause otherwise, I’d be worried that when Barnes pulls out his dick tonight, you’ll bite it off.” She thinks about telling him that there’s no chance of that, but she might just cut off his if he crosses her. However, that jogs her memory.

“Has he left yet?” Sam nods.

“About an hour ago. Said he had to pick up groceries.” Shit. There goes her plan to shower, throw the damn lingerie back on and proceed as planned.

Bidding Sam a hasty reply, she makes tracks towards her car and, once inside, heads for home. Fine. New plan. She’ll shower once she arrives and then when the evening is drawing to a close, wait for him in bed. Nodding to herself, she puts the car in park and climbs out. Now, to psych herself up enough in the next few hours to put the damn lingerie back on.

___________________________________________________________________________________

Where did he go wrong? It takes all of Bucky’s self control not to spit out the spoonful of sauce he just tasted. This was supposed to be an easy recipe for Chicken Alfredo (or at least, that’s what the website boasted; he should’ve known better than to get his information from the internet and stuck to a good old-fashioned cookbook from the library). Not… whatever the hell this is. Maybe even if the sauce is nauseating, the chicken is okay?

He pulls open the oven door, and immediately smoke billows out, making his eyes water. Okay, chicken’s a little well-done. Who is he kidding? Black. The chicken is burned black. And the pasta… he lifts the pot lid and stirs, only to come to the realization that the pasta is completely stuck to the bottom of the pot. Wonderful.

It’s inevitable; over the years, he’s had his fair share of cooking disasters, but usually he does okay. Tonight though… who the hell up there did he piss off, because the only explanation for how badly this is going is his karma coming due.

Still holding the offending spoon, he looks over at Sarge, who’s staring at him, long pink tongue sticking out as he pants. “Trust me, boy. You don’t want any of this.” There has to be something else he can pull together on short notice. Normally he’d be worried that she’s running late without so much as a text, but today he’s relieved. At least if she’s running behind he’ll have time to… what? Maybe order takeout? Before she gets-

“I’m home.” Shit.

Sarge yips, shaking with excitement, and starts towards the kitchen door, then turns back, uncertain. “Go on. I know you’re dying to jump on her and lick her face.” Something they really should be training out of him because he’s getting too big for that sort of behaviour but, well… there’s a reason they call them “puppy dog eyes.”

Not needing to be coaxed, the dog takes off, tripping a little in the momentary lapse in his memory that he’s a tripod, but easily catches himself and goes on his merry way, leaving Bucky to clean up his mess. From the sound of things, a game of fetch is going on in the living room, so she should be distracted for a while.

He manages to pour the sauce down the drain and scrape most of the pasta into the trash while Sarge is acting as a decoy, but there’s absolutely no way he can dispose of the chicken without tipping her off (damn enhanced senses, it’s a wonder she hasn’t already smelled it). Finally, he decides to just go for it. She’s going to notice whether he throws it out now or two hours from now. Might as well get a head start on cleaning.

Sure enough, not ten seconds after he empties out the oven, he catches a movement in his peripheral vision, and the familiar sound of her breathing tips him off that he’s no longer alone.

“Hey, Doll.”

“Hey, Bucky. Did something burn in here, or-” He holds up the pan for her inspection before continuing his scraping.

“That’s one way to put it, yeah.” He slams the lid back on the trashcan and turns on the tap, intent on rinsing out the pan. “Another is whoever the god of culinary arts is has it in for me today.”

She chuckles. “You know, that would be funnier if we didn’t actually know a god.”

“Yeah, but he’s in control of thunder.” He meets her eyes, smirking slightly. “Although it did look like I electrocuted the bird.” Her lips quirk up into a smile, and he takes the opportunity to kiss her, cupping the back of her head gently to hold her in place when she tries to move away, muttering something about being sweaty.

He’s not entirely sure how it happened, but by the time they come up for air, her back his pressed against the wall and he’s got her pinned in place. Not that he’s complaining.

“Anyone ever tell you that the tip of your nose turns pink after you’ve been kissed?’ Her cheeks go rosey in response.

“I think so. One guy did. I told him it’s only when I’m kissed properly.”

He really would like to continue the playful banter, but there’s still the small matter of whatever it is they’re going to eat.

“What do you feel like for dinner tonight?”

“Apart from electrocuted chicken?” He responds with a swat to her ass, which earns him a snicker. “Let’s keep it simple. Pizza. Your choice of toppings.” Right, that’s easy enough. Plus, if they have to wait longer than thirty minutes, it’s free.

“Okay. I’ll order while you shower?”

“Sounds like a plan.”

He’s just pulled up the menu on his phone when the sound of her clearing her throat attracts his attention. She’s standing in the doorway, combing through her freshly let down hair with her fingers, a playful look in her eyes.

“Or you could join me. Just a mild suggestion.”

Dinner can wait for a while.

___________________________________________________________________________________

The Brooklyn townhouse they live in has many nice features. There’s a functional if small screened in back porch, big enough to hold a table for two and a grill. Two bedrooms, on the off chance someone from work needs to crash for a night or two. A kitchen with a dishwasher. A working fireplace. Good closet space. And an en suite bathroom.

Maybe it’s a little ridiculous to call a bathroom luxurious, especially when, in comparison to what’s featured in many brownstones, it’s more than modest, but she can’t help but think of it as such. There’s a double sink so that in the morning rush to get ready, Bucky’s able to shave and brush his teeth without having to wait for her to finish applying her makeup. Shelving above the toilet makes certain that even if the last person to shower took the towel with them, another one is on hand. Speaking of the shower, it’s not the largest one in the world, but both of them can fit in comfortably at the same time, which is what’s lead to their current situation.

She’s just finished allowing the water to course over her body, easing the sweat from her skin, and is about to begin the process of washing her hair, scrubbing her body, but she hesitates. She might as well ask. It’s only practical after all.

“Do you want to start now or get cleaned up and have dinner beforehand?” It’s obvious what she’s referring to, so she doesn’t bother to spell it out.

His brown knits, and if she didn’t know him as… intimately… as she does, she’d actually believe he’s confused.

“Oh, so you’re just assuming there’s gonna be sex involved at some point tonight?”

She shrugs, wringing out her hair.

“Seemed like a safe enough bet.” She glances pointedly between the two of them. “After all, we’re already undressed. “

His laugh is a quiet huff, barely discernible over the sound of the water. “Then I’d say start now, have dinner, then go for round two. Sound about right to you?”

She nods. “Solid plan.”

“Then get over here.”

Unlike the welcome home kiss they shared not half an hour ago, this one is less tender, more electric. Hands twist in hair, bodies press together. Tongues begging for entrance quickly give way to teeth nipping at bottom lips, an unspoken sparring match for who’ll be in control this time around. Ultimately he wins, grasping her hips and lifting as she wraps her legs securely around his back.

There’s no need for prep; the teasing of their earlier words is foreplay enough. Back pressed against the wall, her body easily welcomes him in as she braces one arm against the glass shower doors for balance. Any concerns about slipping and falling wash away as they move together like so many times before. She’s sure her nails will leave marks on his back, fingertips digging in for purchase and it’s a guarantee her hips will be littered with fingerprints from his grip, but she can’t find it in her to care, and if the desperate, bruising kiss assaulting her lips is anything to judge from, neither can he.

“So damn good, Doll.” It’s panted against her neck. “Always. So damn perfect for me.” All she can manage is a moan in response.

She feels him twitch inside of her and knows he’s close. So is she, but she can’t quite get there without-

As if he’s read her mind, he reaches between them to touch her where she needs it most, and on instinct, she readjusts, locking her arm around his neck to stay in place. “Let go, sweetheart. Can you do that for me?” She couldn’t disobey if she wanted to.

“Fuck.” As her walls contract around him, he pulls out just in time to paint her middle with his release.

“That’s one word for it.” She’s still fighting to catch her breath, but she shoots him a shaky smirk, which he returns.

“Happy Valentine’s Day, Mrs. Barnes.” Snickering, she releases him to stand on unsteady legs and pecks his legs.

“Happy Valentine’s Day, Mr. Barnes.” Maybe there’s something to this holiday after all.

___________________________________________________________________________________

“You want the last slice?” Bucky considers it for a moment before deciding-

“Nah. You can have it.” It may not be exactly what he planned, but it’s been a good night. Between the two of them, they’ve gone through two large pizzas while watching the new version of Beauty and the Beast (she rolled her eyes when he asked if this was her way of saying he reminds her of a certain hairy, horned character) in their pajamas.

“No, really. You take it. I don’t want it.” She nudges the mostly-empty pizza box towards him. The noise makes Sarge lift his head from where he was snoozing beside her on the sofa. That gives him an idea.

“I don’t want it either, but I can think of someone who does.” He cocks his head towards the now-drooling dog. “How ‘bout it, boy? Wanna help us out?”

Snickering, she picks the pepperonis and pieces of sausage and ham from the pizza, forming a pile. “Here, Sarge. Catch.” She tosses a coveted treat in the air, and Sarge’s jaw snaps, swallowing it whole. “Good boy.”

They sit in comfortable silence for a few minutes before she speaks again.

“You know, I actually did have something planned for you.”

“Oh, yeah?” She nods.

“Absolutely. Had a whole seduction plan laid out. Tiny underwear, lacy bra, and stockings with garters included.” Huh. Guess she wouldn’t have taken the “lingerie” option the wrong way. He’ll file that away for future use… along with a mental note to ask her bra size. “That is, until I tried wearing the damn things for longer than an hour. Turns out, hiding a dirty secret under your clothes is more itchy than sexy.”

He can’t help it. He laughs, producing a pout from her which quickly turns into her own quiet laughter.

“Well, that fits in perfectly with my fancy dinner going up in smoke.”

“We really do have shitty luck with the whole “romance” thing.” She’s joking, but he decides to respond anyway.

“I don’t know about that.” Entwining his fingers with hers, he lifts their hands, twin wedding bands catching the light. “You waited five years for me to reappear after the blip, and I convinced you to elope with me. Seems pretty romantic.” Although, that reminds him…

“Don’t move.” Releasing her hand, he stands and goes in search of his phone.

“Bucky, what-”

“Don’t move, Doll. Stay right where you are.” Ah. On the kitchen counter, just where he left it. Jogging back into the room, he resumes his place on the couch next to her. Ignoring her questioning gaze, he pulls up the app and, selecting the correct playlist, hits play.

Immediate recognition blooms on her face at the opening lyrics. “She is the sweetest thing that I know. Should see the way she holds me when the lights go low.” He’s not one for modern music, but when he was googling “songs for Valentine’s Day” and this one popped up, he couldn’t help but think that the lyrics were fitting.

“I didn’t know you’d heard this one.”

He chuckles. “Even old men have a few tricks up their sleeves. That, and a wifi connection.” She rolls her eyes but leans closer, which he takes advantage of to show her the playlist.

“This is the app you use, right?” Receiving a nod, he continues. “Feel free to scroll through and add whatever you want. I haven’t listened to all of them the whole way through, but they seemed to fit the mood.”

Her hand closes over his, covering the phone. “Thank you, Bucky. It’s perfect.”

As the singer goes on about how hearts don’t break around here, he presses his lips against hers.

“I love you, Doll.”

“Love you.”

Not bad for a disastrous Valentine’s Day. Not bad at all.

#marvel #the avengers #bucky fanfic #bucky x original female character #bucky x you #bucky x reader #bucky x y/n #bucky barnes #captain america #the winter soldier #bucky barnes smut #smut #fluff

[maybe-your-left]

It Is Your Birthday.

okay this is the FIFTH TIME i've written this because Tumblr sucks and keeps deleting shit when I try to add links.

its my arch enemies birthday today, so all of you need to mock @finn-ray-nal-beads for being closer to 30 which we all know means that shes essentially dead.

BIRTHDAY DOCTOR REN STYLE.

------

You expected to wake up to the smell of coffee. Maybe greeted with a tray of breakfast in bed. Your loving and handsome boyfriend giving you a heavy-handed mimosa.

You expected to walk out of the bedroom and see a large bouquet of flowers on the kitchen counter. Surrounded by boxes of gifts all hand picked out by him, because he loves to spoil you.

You expected to wake up to a huge, hard, stiff cock sliding into your cunt. Followed by a harsh pounding with kisses and bruises from him, while he told you how much he loved his 'little whore'.

You did NOT expect to wake up alone.

You did NOT expect to have nothing but a text message from him saying he was on call all day.

Even though you had spent the entire week reminding him that something special was happening. Hinting that your friends were taking you to birthday lunch, which only prompted him to ask 'who's birthday is it'?

An icy glare was shared before he went back to reading his newspaper.

Of course, you woke up to messages and Facetime calls from friends and family singing off-key happy birthday. Telling you how much they loved you and that gifts were being sent. Your friends reminding you that they would pick you up for brunch, and promised to get you considerably drunk.

You showered, waiting to see if Ren would message you. But all you got was a message at 4 AM saying he was on call. You were upset, how could he forget something like this? He didn't forget Valentines... granted that was on his calendar and the office decorated for it so he had to acknowledge the holiday.

You dressed in a baby-blue dress, paired with some chunky heels that were insanely cute. Hair was done, makeup was soft but sexy, you looked hot. You wished Ren was here, he would've said you looked nice, followed by sliding his hands up the skirt of your dress and groping you until you rode his cock at the table. But no, he wasn't here.

You huffed, deciding to head out for coffee, there was no way you were drinking the black-extra caffeinated shit Ren drinks every morning. It legally shouldn't be safe for consumption, so free coffee it was!

Grabbing your purse, you blindly fingered for your keys. "Where are you," you whispered, Ren called your bag a Mary-Poppins bag because everything disappeared in there. But that didn't stop him from shoving random shit inside it, like medical gloves, surgical masks, even a package of syringes because he's insane.

"Gotcha," you sighed, walking to the garage. Flipping the light and pressing the open button before you stopped cold.

You stared, blinking rapidly to see if it was fake. You glanced down to the keys in your hand, clicking the unlock and sure enough it beeped.

"What the fuck," you whispered.

A Porsche.

A fucking Porsche.

With a big black bow on top, like one of those car commercials. It was a champagne pink, with plates that said Angel. You slowly approached it, pressing the start button from the key. Jumping when it responded, you were speechless.

Under one of the wipers was a card. Black envelope and all, you carefully ripped it open, inside a pink card.

Angel,

I know you thought I forgot your birthday but I'm not that stupid. So, Happy Birthday, please don't get a ticket. The inside is custom leather, so don't spill any coffee in it like you did in my car last week.

There's also presents in the trunk, take them out before driving since some are fragile.

I hope you like it, I hated your car so this was the best option for both of us.

With love,

Dr. Kylo Ren MD.

You did get a ticket.

#happy birthday bitch #finn ray nal beads #adam driver #adamdriver #kylo ren #doctor ren #doctor kylo ren #surgeon AU

[imagining-in-the-margins]

TB&TB Anon Answers! 🐇 [NSFW]

1. Ah, I absolutely adore when people quote me back @ me 😭 It's so sweet and it makes my day every time (especially when I forgot what I even wrote, like right now).

Also, who ever said omg and wowow aren't real words? They are my preferred form of communication 😌

2. You flatter me! Love definitely exists, and I can't wait for you to find it. I'm so excited to show you all more of Penelope! She is not over yet!

Which reminds me, do you y'all have any strong feelings about wanting to see her interact with the team more (like karaoke)? I don't really have any planned, and I'm not sure it would actually be productive for the plot. I might write a little spin off fic for it one day, though. As always, you can let me know here.

3. Never worry about not reading it right at release! I love when people message me a long time after, it just reminds me that people are still stumbling upon my mess and enjoying themselves.

I'm so glad to hear you enjoyed Part 18! I knew it would be a hard one for a lot of people. It was so cathartic to write, and I was shocked by how nice everyone was about it.

For those who missed it, I actually finished Part 21, I just realized today that I never went and updated Part 20 to add a link. You can read Part 21 here! Thanks for sticking around, and I hope you enjoy H2M.

Also... you're fantastic!

4-6. You are so sweet for doing this for me. I really appreciate you, and I hope you know that. It really makes my day every time.

Penelope is one of the most difficult characters to write for me! I honestly think she is one of the most creative characters, and I often find myself unable to string something unique enough together to sound realistic to me. So, I'm very glad you all think it works!

Garvez was stolen from us, and I refuse to accept it. They are in love. Let them be in love, CBS 😭 (or at LEAST give us Ralvez).

He's such an asshole sometimes, lmao. I have an interaction later between Penelope and Spencer that I think encapsulates their relationship well. I wish CBS had gone more into their friendship, because I think it's one of the most valuable ones on the show. (I mean, come on... "If Reid dies, I quit"? Gold.)

I'm always torn between whether Spencer would definitely want to fuck in a library, or NEVER fuck in a library (what if the books get damaged?!).

I'm so glad you caught the petals/feathers part! I didn't get a lot of comments on that section on the other platforms and I felt so clever when I wrote it 😅

Man, the Russian bits in this were just straight translations ripped from a site of "romantic sayings in Russian." If anyone can speak Russian, hmu, lmao. I would much rather have someone to run it by if I can!

Ah, yes... I mentioned it before, but I think it's important for close Readers to realize how dependent the two are on physicality to express themselves. Spencer should probably work on that, huh... ? Wonder why he's doing that...

I fear I have nothing to say to this line beyond 🌝...

I'm glad to hear it didn't drag on. It certainly felt like forever writing it 😂 I've been very exhausted lately by work + social life, but I am thrilled to be back to writing this weekend.

Thank you again, friend. I look forward to hearing from you again, and I hope that you continue to enjoy yourself both in and out of my blog. You are amazing and deserve the world!

7. Awwwe, that's so kind of you to say. I'm glad to hear everyone enjoyed my version of Penelope, I'm always worried that people will disagree with my characterizations. Penelope will be back in a big way later, and I absolutely cannot wait to show you.

I think this is probably the story I reread the most. Partially because I need to remember for a scene I'm writing, and also because I'm always surprised by my own writing, lol! I never remember what I wrote!

8. Ah, you know what, I didn't have any other scenes like that planned! But now that you've pointed it out, I will add one 🤗 It suits that part of the narrative well.

#adultsonlyplease #tb&tb #answer #answered

[sleepychai-fics]

Overhaul x Male!Reader N*FW- Dirty Thoughts for a Clean Man

Request: @weird-fandom-loser ; Ayy man. back again. could you maybe do an nsfw one shot (or headcanons) for a bottom overhaul with male s/o? 👉👈😗

Late again with posting but wheres the surprise in that? I would love to get back into the swing of nsfw one shots. Thank you for giving me this request! Im not exactly confident with how it turned out so feedback is GREATLY appreciated

Pronouns: Male

Words: 1975

Buy me a Ko-fi? ←(link in bio)

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Kai’s golden eyes glaze over the sight of you as steam rolls out of the bathroom and lingers around you.

A hand ruffles through your still damp hair, a few strands falling over your face. Your other hand holds the towel that hands around your waist, keeping the lower half of your body hidden whilst the top half is shown off bare.

Kai can’t help but stare at you. The way the muscles move beneath the skin of your arm as you mess with your hair, the gradient shadows that decorate your skin, the way the droplets of water run down your body, sinking past the towel that hangs at your hips.

The towel is a tease, Kai thinks. It hides the most valuable part of you.

He knows that valuable piece of you like the back of his hand. Well, more accurately the palm of his hand. He knows the texture of it, knows how it tastes, how it feels when it’s buried deep inside him.

He feels completely drunk from the sight of you, not that he would ever admit that aloud to someone.

He wants to feel you all over him. Wants your freshly cleansed hands roaming across his chest, teasing his nipples before sinking below his waist to take hold of him. Want to feel the pleasure that ignites within him as you pump him.

“You know,” Golden eyes snap up to meet your own pair of sparkly (e/c). “For a clean man such as yourself, you are quick to think dirty.”

For a second, Kai stands there confused. It isn’t until he feels the tightness building underneath his pants does he understand your comment.

Feigning annoyance, Kai scoffs. “I have no idea what nonsense you’re going on about.” With that, he turns away and takes the few strides to the bed.

Taking a seat at the edge of the bed, Kai begins to unlatch his mask, setting it gently on the bedside table. Just as he slides his jacket off his shoulders, you step in front of him.

He gasps as your arms come to cage him against the bed, your face mere inches from him. Instinctively, Kai leans back, afraid to be too close to you.

“Come on Kai, you and I both know you’re aching for me to ram you into this mattress.” Your voice is low and vibrates the back of your throat.

What you said was in fact true but there was no way Kai would admit it out loud. It was then that he made the mistake of looking further down your hovering body, only to discover that the towel around your waist had disappeared, revealing your hardening cock. He has to bite his lip to stop the moan that wants to escape past his lips.

He leans away from your as you lean in for a kiss. “Y-You’re filthy.” Oh how badly he wants to slap the stutter out of him.

You merely chuckle at his excuse, lips nibbling at his ear. “I just had a shower, there’s no need to worry about that.”

He can’t deny that, he can smell the custom made shampoo from you.

“You’re going to get me filthy.” For some reason, his own words turn him on more, causing even more strain against his pants.

Hooded eyes glaze with lust as you smirk at him. “Then I guess I’ll have to clean you up afterwards.”

And just like that, the ruthless, violent, and merciless leader of the feared Shie Hassaikai falls into submission.

With a growl of defeat, Kai leans up to complete the kiss. You smile into the kiss as you slowly push him to lay on the bed. He gasps as his back hits the bed. However, the need to be clean is easily overwhelmed by the need for you to be in him.

He welcomes your tongue inside his mouth, letting you explore all the crevices behind his teeth. The kiss only lasts a few more seconds before you pull back.

In utter frustration, Kai snarls. “What are you doing?”

You laugh at his annoyance. “Stripping you down of course.” Fingers glide down his dress shirt, buttons coming undone as they make their way down. Your lips ghost by his ear. “I’m sure you’d like to be fucked butt naked.”

Eagerness washes over Kai, pushing him to sit up, shoving the shirt off. He then hurries to undo his zip but your hands stop him from pulling them down making him choke out a groan.

“Little impatient are we?” You chuckle as you help him remove his pants, freeing his hard cock from it’s tight confines.

Kai throws his head back, mouth wide open in a silent moan as you begin to palm him through his boxers. He lifts a hand up to his chest and begins to pinch and roll his nipple between his fingers.

You groan as you watch him intently. “That’s it handsome, touch yourself for me.”

“You’re taking too long to-” Kai begins to retaliate but a squeeze to his cock stops him and rips a loud moan from him.

“Sorry, what was that? I couldn’t quite understand you.” You sneer as you lean down to engulf Kai’s other nipple in his mouth.

You press the flat of your tongue against his nipple, teeth barely touching skin. All while you drag his pants and boxers down with one hand and pump his cock with the other.

Kai is in bliss. It’s overwhelming but he loves it.

After a few minutes, you lift off of him, standing above him, eyes hazy over the sight of Kai breathless and sweaty.

It only takes a few seconds for him to be annoyed at the loss of contact. “Why did you stop?”

You shrug. “Just admiring the view.” You smirk at the faint blush that paints his cheeks. Turning to the bedside table, you open the drawer. “Besides, I think it’s time we get you prepped.” You pull out the bottle of lube, lifting it up for him to see.

Kai grunts at the spark of pleasure that shoots through to his dick. “I don’t need to be prepped. I can take you raw.”

Clicking your tongue, you shake your head. “No you can’t.” You open the cap and coat a generous amount onto your fingers. “Don’t worry, I’ll prep you nice and good. Stretch you out for my cock.”

Kai fucking whines. He doesn’t mean to but it’s out before he can stop it.

You chuckle, leaning over him with your lubed up fingers tracing the rim of his asshole. “I’ll take that as a ‘Please do it’.”

As you press in one finger, Kai moans, throwing his head back and closing his eyes in pleasure.

“Look at that. Your ass is sucking up my finger. You’re so needy aren’t you?” You say as you pump your finger in and out, curling it to scrape against his walls.

“Then why don’t you add another finger if I’m that needy.” Kai grunts.

“So bossy. You’re lucky I want to bury my dick inside you so much.” You reply, slipping in a second finger.

You continue your treatment, setting a comfortable rhythm. Soon enough you begin to scissor him, stretching out his hole. Kai bucks into your fingers, desperate for more of you.

By the time you add the third finger, he is painfully hard, beads of pre-cum dripping down his vein-popped cock.

“Look at you. Such a mess.” You say as you peer over his spread out body. He wriggles underneath your stare. “I think you’re ready for me now.” You pull your fingers out, leaving his ass clenching around nothing.

Kai wraps his arms around your neck, pulling you down to his level, and presses an open mouthed kiss to your lips. He licks along your lips, diving between them as you open with a smirk.

Kai pulls away after a few lingering seconds. “Just fuck me already.”

“What if I want to stop? Leave you here without fucking you. Leave you squirming in the bitter cold.”

His eyes widen with fear. “Please don’t.”

You burst into laughter at his expression and quick reply. “You’re lucky I’m feeling generous today.”

Without another breath wasted, you line yourself up with him and thrust into him, burying yourself to the hilt in his ass.

Kai chokes out a loud moan, back arching into you as he clenches around your cock. You dive down to kiss his exposed neck, hips taking off with a steady pace.

Hands come to grip on your biceps, nails digging into your muscles. Kai clenches his jaw, moans coming out as seething breaths.

“You love it when I fuck you hard, don’t you?” You whisper to him, increasing his pace.

Kai can’t think of anything to say back. He can’t think to begin with. The only sounds that come from him are the breathless groans and the occasional open mouthed moans as you hit the sweet spot inside him.

“Look at how dirty you are.”

Kai can feel how dirty he is. He feels sticky with his precum drooling to his stomach. His cock is wet and sticky and he can feel bits of it drying up. Despite all these gross sensations, he loves the feeling of you. The way you continuously pound into him with such ruthless force it feels likes he’s being torn apart. The sensations clash against each other and makes him feel conflicted.

“Why don’t you take a firm hold of your cock baby? Pump it for me.”

For a hot minute, Kai forgot about his cock. He was so busy with the feeling of you that he forgot himself. He barely hesitated to reach down between the two of you and grab his cock tightly. He grimaced at the sticky feeling of his cum before he fought through it and began stroking his cock in time with your thrusts.

“That’s it Kai. Just like that.” You praise him whilst increasing your already ferocious pace.

Kai groans at the building pleasure, his hand increasing its grip on his dick, sending more electrifying pleasure to his brain. Desperate to go over the edge, he begins to move his in time with your thrusts.

An animalistic growl leaves you as you lean down, teeth latching onto his clavicle.

The room is filled with the sound of skin slapping and breathless moans as you continue to piston your hips into Kai, driving the both of you closer to orgasm.

Kai is the first to cum, hips lifting off the bed, the grip on his cock loosening as thick ropes of cums shoots out, splattering all over your stomach and dribbling onto his own. His muscles twitch in the aftermath, body relaxing as you desperately chase your own end.

You groan into his neck as your hips still, filling him up with your cum. Your hips spasm for seconds after your release before you slowly slip yourself out of him, falling to lay beside Kai.

For a minute, neither of you move, besides your chests as they rise and fall with each breath.

Kai turns to you, hair slick with sweat and sticking to his forehead. He grimaces. “You’re filthy.” He eyes the drying cum on your stomach.

A stream of laughter bubbles out of you. “This is your cum.”

Kai snarls in response. With a deep breath, he sits up. “We need to clean up.”

“Are you sure you can stand?”

Kai glares at you with a vicious glare. He ignores you and stands up from the bed. Regret immediately washes over him as his knees shake beneath him.

You leap up beside him, wrapping an arm around your waist. “Fucked ya’ real good didn’t I?”

Kai groans but leans against you.

“Come on big boy, I’ll help wash you up.”

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/

feedback?

#bnha x reader #mha x reader #overhaul #overhaul x reader #overhaul x male reader #kai chisaki #kai chisaki x reader #kai chisaki x male reader #n*fw #overhaul n*fw #overhaul x reader n*fw #overhaul x male reader n*fw #kai chisaki n*fw #kai chisaki x reader n*fw #kai chisaki x male reader n*fw

[snarkwrites]

summer sizzle | surrender - jonathan byers [m]

PROMPTS USED:

 Making your partner whimper + chair + opposites sex ( switch who takes the lead ) + squirm + “Don’t stop.” + “You have no idea what you do to me.” + “I bet you can’t make me cum.”  [ i will have to find the lists I used to come up with these and link later, all apologies ] 

AUTHORS NOTES:

Okay, look... This has been in the works for 3 days now. 3 whole days. I really struggled with the whole submissive role and making it seem natural while also trying to keep in mind that sex at this age is oft clumsy and occasionally awkward. So, hopefully, it turned out okay. HOPEFULLY. Also, I hope it’s not off putting but I just find writing everything in first person to be so much smoother in the long run. Apologies if it is.

Huuuge special thanks go out to @rampagewriting​ & @schizoauthoress​ because you guys really, really, really... helped this thing come together. And I love ya’ll.

PAIRING / FANDOM:

Jonathan Byers x OFC, Briar - Stranger Things Fandom.

WARNINGS:

18+only, naturally submissive character ( male ) , oral ( male recieving), protected sex. MATURE. STAY OUTTA HERE KIDS.

OTHER WORKS USING OFC :

should’ve been a better shot | 

THE SQUAD:

@rampagewriting​ | @chasingeverybreakingwave​ | psst.. if anyone wants to be on my multifandom tag list, pls go add yourself to the doc I’m going to link below.

OTHER LINKS:

[ multifandom tag list doc | four seasons of smut | ] 

                                   -- surrender, jonathan byers x ofc.

The door to his bedroom shut behind us with a soft thud and I reached back, turning the lock as I held his gaze the entire time.

 “We’re finally alone.” my voice was a quiet purr as my hands raised, hooking in the front of his denim jacket, carefully tugging it down his shoulders. It settled on the carpeted floor with a quiet rustle and I stepped a little closer. I’d been teasing him relentlessly all night, pouring on the flirt. Now it was time to make my move. To show Jonathan Byers exactly how much he was wanted by me.

“Finally.” Jonathan answered, his eyes locked on mine and a soft smile as he closed the distance between us. His hand raised, gingerly resting against my cheek as he went in for a kiss. 

I kissed back eagerly, my hands fisting at the front of his gray tee shirt as the kiss grew deeper and my breath got shorter and came in heavy pants. “Jonathan.” I murmured the word against his neck as my lips broke from his and started to trail down the side. When my body rubbed against his, his fingertips dug into my sides and he pulled back to stare down at me. “Yeah?” his breathing hitched and I felt him shiver a little as my lips continued to trail over his neck, moving upward this time.

 “Mmm.”he gave a soft sigh and  his eyes fluttered open then shut and I gave a soft giggle, just barely grazing my teeth against skin as I muttered quietly, “You like that, hm?”

“Mhm.” he muttered huskily, pouting a little when he tried to steer my mouth back to his but instead, I started to move it down the front of his throat as I walked him backwards, towards the chair that sat at his desk.The back of his knees hit the seat of the chair and I gently shoved him down to sit in it, lowering myself onto his lap and taking his face in my hands, allowing him a kiss on the lips again at last. 

His fingers were digging even harder into my ass by now and he wrapped his arm around me to keep me from falling out of his lap and off the chair. I bit my lip, an electric tingle racing through my body at the way those hands felt on me.I pulled back and we worked on catching our breath, staring at each other in a daze as I trailed the tip of my finger over his bottom lip. 

“You have no idea what you do to me.. Fuck.” I whimpered softly as my head fell back and I rocked in place against his lap as my hands raised, fingers digging into his shoulders. Jonathan sucked in a ragged breath and he stammered out quietly, “ Briar?” as he stared up at me, in a daze. 

Swallowing hard, he squirmed in his seat when I rocked against him all over again, harder this time and I leaned in really close, taking his face in my hands. 

A whimper rose and bubbled out of me when I felt him starting to strain against his blue jeans and I gave him a wink as I mumbled against the shell of his ear, “But I know exactly what I’m doing to you right now… And I like it. Do you like it, Jon?”

“Fuck. Y-yeah, baby. Don’t stop.” he practically whimpers the words, his hands leaving where they splayed across my lower back to grip my hips as he really started to squirm in the seat, rubbing against me carefully. His mouth met mine again gingerly and our teeth bumped together, the quiet scrape making me giggle. 

I rocked myself against him again, bearing down a little harder. He bucked in the chair, leaning into me to press his forehead against mine as he chuckled quietly, “What has gotten into you, Briar?”Hungrily, I nipped at his lower lip, wasting no time in going for another deep and steady kiss. There wasn’t a truly clear answer to the question he’d asked me. I just wanted him. I wanted him so bad I could taste it.

“ I just want you. So bad.” the answer forced it’s way out of my mouth as his teeth clenched my bottom lip, tugging as the kiss grew even deeper and I started to really rock myself over the bulge strained at his jeans. His hands were all over me now, slow and cautious in their exploration and I shivered, my head falling back as whimpers left my lips. It felt so good.So good that I almost completely forgot for a second that I was the one in control here. But as soon as I remembered, oh boy…

I took his face in my hands, licking my lips at the way his mouth was swollen and deep pink, starting to bruise from the kisses so far. My forehead against his, I mumbled brazenly against his mouth, “Let me take care of you, hm?” as my hand lowered, going straight for the hem of his gray t-shirt. Working it up and over his head, I let it land on the floor. 

He swallowed hard, biting his lip, bucking himself against me just a little, desperate like me to keep the friction building. I exhaled sharply and bore down harder, riding the bulge strained at his jeans and making him whimper, panting for breath as he bucked into me clumsily. Lust blown brown eyes fixed on me, almost glimmering in the dim lights of his bedroom. He eyed my shirt and I leaned in, mumbling against his lips with a soft giggle, “Want me to show you what to do with those hands, Jon?” despite the fact that I was pretty sure he knew exactly what to do.

I think it got me just a little more hot that he was willing to let me take over like this most of the time. I enjoy it. The way his eyes flutter open and closed when I start to trail my lips down his abdomen.. That hitch in his breathing when I go for the button on his jeans and stop, looking back up at him… Watching him come apart below me while I ride out my own bliss. One day I suppose I’ll push until he takes over, but for right now, I’m just too into being the one to take over. To please him. Because he pleases me enough, just being in love with him.

He nodded and I took his hands, guiding them down to the hem of my shirt. He gripped the hem of my shirt, the tug upward almost sheer torture. Between the feel of his hands against my skin, rough in texture but oh so gentle in touch, and the clumsy slow pace he took in pulling my shirt off, I was rocking against him even faster, my cunt practically throbbing with need by now. 

As soon as my shirt hit the floor and he gave another louder whimper, his hands moving back up my midriff, lingering at my chest to push it together, my head fell back and I rocked against him with more urgency. Between the anticipation of what I knew was coming and the way his hands felt on my body, it took everything in me not to just rush headfirst into it all.

But I wanted to take my time with him.I took hold of his hand, lowering it to my core, biting my lip. He growled quietly, that followed by another series of whimpers when I rocked myself into his hand and moaned his name, panting for breath. “Jonathan.” 

A soft smirk came and lingered on kiss swollen lips at the way I moaned for him and he bucked himself against me a little harder, a little bolder. 

“Does that feel good, princess?” the question was him, honestly wanting to know if he was making me feel good and I smiled against his lips, muttering into another slow and deep kiss, “God yes. Don’t stop.” and gingerly, he cupped me through my favorite skintight jeans, biting his lip when my whimpers grew in volume, shattering the quiet around us. 

I raised my hand to my mouth, giggling a little, cheeks heating up because as much as tonight was about me, making him feel good, it was about me… exploring another side of myself.I pulled away from the kiss, sliding out of his lap a little, down to my knees where I pushed his legs open, centering myself between them, giving him a teasing little wink as I brushed my lips delicately over smooth pale skin. I felt his abs flex under my lips and I smirked as I grazed my teeth over patches of skin erratically. “Does that feel good?” I stopped to lock eyes with him just as I got to the strip of skin above the waistband of his jeans. I could see the bulge twitching, growing. I swallowed hard and licked my lips, repeating my question.

 Jonathan answered in a daze, “So good. S-so good baby.” as his hand rested gingerly on top of my head. I worked the button free to his jeans and I felt his stomach tense a little, felt his cock twitching a little more. I stopped to gaze up at him, biting my lip and glancing down at his lap. He licked his lips and nodded, taking a deep breath. “Go on, princess.” he uttered the words softly, his voice edged with lust.

I nodded and answered quietly, “Pull my hair a little, baby. Feels good.” as I worked the zipper to his jeans down and then raised my hands, tugging his jeans so that they fell down to his ankles.He tensed even more and a low growl rose, ripping out of his mouth as he breathed heavily and I felt his thighs tense in anticipation. Carefully, his fingers tangled in my hair, giving a little tug as I moved my mouth over the dark colored fabric of his boxers, sending a shiver through his body. 

I could feel his toes digging into the carpet and the fact that I was the one making him do all this only made me bolder. I rolled my tongue over the fabric covered bulge to tease a little more and he hissed urgently, bucking his hips upward clumsily, another tug at my hair. 

“Briar.” my name was moaned in a tone slightly above a whisper, a needy whimper following close on the heels of it.My fingers hooked in the waistband of his underwear and slowly, I started to work those down his legs, whimpering almost helplessly myself as his cock sprang free and I got a glimpse of the size and girth of it. 

He was.. Definitely packing more in his jeans than Tommy H had been. I swallowed hard and gave a soft giggle when he shifted around a little to make it easier to get his underwear completely off. They settled at his ankles with his jeans and I rose up to steal another kiss, muttering against his mouth, “Are you ready to let me make you feel good, baby?”

“Fuck.” he gasped, his back arching slightly as he bucked against the hand I’d curled around his length when it started to slowly pump up and down with gentle and lazy strokes. I sank back down to my knees, a lust blown gaze up at him as my tongue rolled over the tip of his cock. If I thought he was squirming before, it was nothing compared to the way he squirmed at the feel of my warm wet tongue trailing over every thick inch of his cock. His other hand settled on my shoulder, finger tips digging in to grip and I took him in my mouth, head bobbing up and down and then down and up slowly.“Briar, shit.. Baby.” his whines were getting louder, more needy. 

“C’mon, baby.” I urged, pressing little kitten licks against the side of his cock before taking him in my mouth again. “I told you to pull my hair.”

He gave my hair a slightly harder tug as asked when his cock brushed against the back of my throat and I stopped long enough to mumble the question, “Do you want to see me touch myself, Jonathan?”

He nodded, biting his lip as he stared down at me. I switched hands, the hand that had been wrapped around his cock drifting down, over my breasts, lingering a second or two. He was really starting to squirm in the chair now, his whimpers and groans getting louder with each one that fell from his lips. Lust blown brown eyes fixed on me and he licked his lips, attempting to lean forward in the chair a little, probably to go in for a kiss. My hand moved lower, fingertips dancing over my midriff.

“Briar.” his voice was almost pleading, he was digging his toes into the floor to an extent that had his thighs shaking slightly. His hands rested on his thighs, fingers opening and closing like he was desperate to grab hold of something.  I licked my lips and my gaze settled on his cock again, standing at attention.As I lowered my mouth all over again, I lowered my hand, letting it settle between my thighs, my fingers ghosting over my dripping slit. My tongue rolled over the tip of his cock, little kitten licks that made him squirm and buck.

 His hand found it’s way to my hair again and he groaned out hoarsely, “I wanna see you.. Touch yourself. Please?”I wrapped my mouth around him, letting his cock hit the back of my throat and he tugged at my hair, carefully bucking upward. “Is that okay?” he murmured in a voice thick with need, staring down at me as I worked my mouth back upward, my lips softly popping as I raised my head, licking my lips, groaning at the taste of him in my mouth.

 “I’m not made of glass, baby.” I mumbled in a daze, my hands wandering again, this time, I sat up straighter on my knees, giving him a better view as my hand drifted down my body again, fingers toying with my dripping slit, circling my clit as I bit my lip and whimpered his name, my head falling back and my eyes fluttering open and shut.The sound of him groaning and his quiet growl at the end of the groaning caused me to open my eyes and he was staring at me, biting his lip. He nodded to his lap and I swallowed hard, my eyes settling on his cock, standing at attention.

I was literally aching for it by this point, all squirmy, dripping and ready. “Are you trying to say something, baby?” I asked the question in a tone of feigned innocence, just to push a little. 

He leaned in, his hand catching hold of my chin, pulling my lips against his almost desperately. “I’m saying I want you, princess. Now, please?” he groaned against my mouth as I pulled myself up from the floor. His hands raised, settling on my hips as he nodded to his nightstand. “In the drawer, love.” he gasped as I lowered myself just a little, teasing his length between my dripping folds.

 I slunk over to the nightstand after a minute or two of grinding against him and opened the drawer, digging around until I found the condom tossed carelessly in the corner of the drawer.

Right on top of a picture of me that I had no idea he’d taken or even when he might have taken it. It was taped back together. I bit my lip, smiling to myself just a little.

I slunk back over to the chair and lowered myself, sitting on the edge of his lap as I tore open the wrapper, stopping to catch his gaze. “You’re.. Sure… right?” I asked the question in a quiet whisper, leaning in to press a gentle kiss against his mouth. He deepened the kiss, his hand over mine as I worked the rubber down over his cock. “Now, please?” he practically whimpered the words, moving his hand from mine to grasp my hips again gently, pulling me closer in his lap. I raised up, sinking down on his cock slowly, carefully.

“Fuck.” I gasped out, my head falling back as he stretched and filled me. I leaned against him, a hand on either side of his face, my thumbs rolling across lightly stubbled jaws as my mouth dove in and crashed against his and I rocked myself around a little, trying to get used to the size of him.

He caught my gaze, eyeing me in concern. “Are you okay?”

“Mhm.” I hummed, starting to rock my hips a little faster. His hands glided softly all over my body, drifting down, gripping hold of my ass as he bucked into me from below, his breath warm against the shell of my ear as he muttered quietly, “Feels so good. Does it feel good to you?”

“God.” I whimpered out, riding him a little faster, my breath catching in my  throat. My head fell back slightly and I bit back another louder whimper, “Amazing, Jonathan. Don’t stop, please? Just like that.” My lips left his lips and moved down his neck, teeth catching here and there on skin, leaving little marks behind. His head fell back a little, exposing more of his neck to me and I took it as an invite to lean in, my hips switching from just straight out rocking back and forth to rolling, a figure 8 as I danced on his cock slowly and my mouth latched on, gently leaving an even bigger mark behind. 

His hands gripped me tighter and his thrusts sped up even more, his cock bottoming out and making me whine and moan against his neck. “Ugh, Briar.. That feels so good baby. C’mon.” he pleaded, continuing to thrust into me from below, the sloppy wet sounds each time his cock sank in deeper almost driving me straight into one hell of an orgasm.

For someone who probably hadn’t ever done this before, he definitely knew what the fuck he was doing. Clumsy and gentle slow touches, the way his mouth danced over my throat, leaving little tentative marks against my skin, his teeth barely grazing my collarbones until he latched on to leave a mark of his own against my skin.

 “I’m..” I panted, barely keeping my moans and whimpers quiet now, “I’m so close, baby. I bet you can’t make me cum.” I teased gently, giving him a soft kiss. He seemed to take the challenge, thrusting even deeper and bottoming out all over again, his cock striking against that one magic spot over and over until all I wanted to do was scream his name. 

I almost did at one point but he quickly crashed his lips against mine, muffling the loud moan, groaning himself when I bounced a little faster up and down on his cock. His hands gripped my body tight, probably tight enough to leave light bruising behind and I could feel myself dancing closer to the orgasm that had been building, clinging to him, my arms around his neck and my mouth against his, our lips meeting almost perfectly, my lips latching onto his top lip.

“Can’t stop… fuck.” we both moaned into the kiss at nearly the same time and I felt my orgasm shatter through me, sending a shiver racing through my body as my finger tips dug into his back lightly, Jonathan continuing to plow into me from below, muttering lazily against my throat, “So wet, baby. So good.Shit.” a loving gaze as he fixed his eyes on me and bit his lip, raising his hand to catch at the side of my face, his thumb rolling carefully over my bruised lips, hissing softly in concern.I giggled and clung to him, my head resting against the space between his neck and shoulder as we both worked our way back down from the high of our orgasm. 

“I’m not made of glass. It doesn’t hurt.” I reassured him as our eyes met. 

I didn’t want to move from his lap and honestly, I wasn’t sure I could if I tried. 

Jonathan stood, carrying me over to his bed, leaning down and pulling me into another kiss. 

“I’ll be back in a second, princess. Just going to get something to clean us up.”

“And some water please?” I propped on my elbows and called out behind him, letting out a quiet whistle as I watched him disappear into the bathroom.

#jonathan byers x original character fanfiction #jonathan byers fanfiction #jonathan byers smut #jonathan byers x original character smut #jonathan byers fanfic #jonathan byers x original character fanfic #jonathan byers imagine #jonathan byers x original character imagine #// 18+ only #// i mean this. this is mature content. #// no kids.

[the-mu-in-muichirou]

The Pillars playing UNO

I have what is probably one of the most brillent ideas ever; the Pillar playing the video game version of UNO. The mere hilarity of it would far too hilarious to ignore.

————-

(My reply is down here)

It is a very brilliant idea! I think the idea of the pillars playing UNO in general is hilarious, especially depending who ends up sitting next to who.

The element online uno adds is definitely sure to make the game interesting.

Before I write any hcs:

(SKIP DOWN BELOW TO THE NEXT CUT OFF BELOW IF YOU ALREADY KNOW HOW TO PLAY.)

For anyone who hasn’t played online UNO! The game is basically the same as normal UNO! Except with a few added twists!!

If someone plays a ZERO everyone will switch cards to the next person in the rotation the game is currently playing In.

If someone plays a SEVEN that person can switch hands with the person of their choosing.

If someone plays a card with the same number and color you have you can jump in and also play the same card not waiting for it to be your turn.

+2 and +4 cards can be stacked on eachother. So let’s say Mui has +2 , it moves to Shinobu, she plays +2, it moves to Uzui, he plays +2, and then it gets to Sanemi and he doesn’t have a +2 he’s collecting 6 cards from the deck and it moves on to the next person. (The same can be applied to the +4)

+4 cards can be challenged, meaning that if you challenge someone putting down a +4 it means you think they had something playable besides the +4. If you are right they gain +4 instead. If you are wrong you gain the +4 and two cards extra (so 6 cards total.) for losing the challenge.

Like normal UNO if you don’t call UNO (in this case pressing the UNO button before playing your second to last card.) you will gain two cards if you’re caught.

(Which I think is bs I make the person get 6 or 4 cards when they don’t call UNO in a normal card game not online.)

If I didn’t explain anything clearly!!

Follow this link for a better explanation.

Also this one

And if you don’t know how to play UNO in general, yikes. Plz look that up

(Also I wrote all this and I don’t even know if this is what you meant but it’s written so…)

———-

Being stuck between Rengoku and Uzui is a nightmare!!!

+4, +2, skipped oof’ it’s horrible unless someone can keep up with that chaos

Giyuu somehow always gets UNO but ends up never winning any game. It’s not comprehensible???

He literally JUST has UNO what do you mean he has 20 cards now??

Giyuu also gains a lot of skip cards he doesn’t use until the end.

It’s extremely funny watching the person next to him get skipped continuously.

Sanemi somehow ALWAYS ends up with half the deck. He literally only plays one card before he starts collecting half the deck.

It infuriates him to no end.

Sanemi has 50/50 luck he can either win at the start or never win.

Sanemi always challenges +4’s he doesn’t TRUST anyone and is always looking for a fight.

He doesn’t win most of them that’s why he has more than half the deck smh.

Misturi always compliments someone when they put down a card. She always says “that was such a good card!” Even if it’s a normal card.

Misturi forgets to press UNO.

A LOT.

Baby girl just forgets and look it happens!! She just gets very flustered when she has to draw more cards and realizes she forgot how to press it.

Obanai ABSOLUTELY HATES when he has one card left and someone makes him draw more cards.

It gets on his nerves.

It’s just unfair! He was about to win and a little shit decides to pull this shit.

He likes stacking cards!

Obanai somehow always has a +2 card on him and won’t ever collect from all that stacking.

COINCIDENCE??? I THINK NOT !

it really is just a coincidence though

Shinobu Wins a lot

She’s that one player that always ends winning no matter what!

Shinobu could have 18 cards while the rest have 5 and she’ll still win!

ITS FUCKING MAGIC!

There is no other explanation for this. Everyone refuses to think of another reason.

Shinobu, in her defense, doesn’t know how things work so well.

Although there are times when she doesn’t win and things she has planned out don’t pan out and Shinobu gets aggravated

HIMEJIMA!!!

This dude!!!! This man!!!

Is really GOOD at this game!

He calls people out for missing to press UNO.

He challenges the +4 cards and wins??

He also get the good hands when the cards swap.

YET! His wins are lower than Shinobu.

RIP

He does his best!

Mui!

He likes using reverses and skips.

Will have a reverse every game and keep reversing until he runs out of them!

He also skips people for fun. No reason he just finds it funny when someone has 18 cards and can’t put any down.

Chaotic, he never get caught when he doesn’t press UNO miraculously.

He wins a fair amount of times but he’s mostly there to watch people scream at eachother.

He LOVES choosing blue even if he doesn’t have the color.

It’s confusing but no one questions him.

At the end of the day everyone is emotionally tired for the heat of the game.

#I hope this was okay?? #I didn’t know If you wanted headcanons so I hope this was okay?? #anyways!! THIS WAS A LOVELY IDEA!! IT WAS FUN TO WRITE BUT MY DUMBASS THOUGHT IT WAS WITH CARDS AND I HAD TO GO BACK AND ADJUST FOR THAT SJS #The Pillars Play #should this be a thing now? #!! #submissions #submission #the mu in muichirou submission #T-M-I-M submissions #kimetsu no yaiba #demon slayer #kny #kny headcanons #kny hcs #tomioka giyuu #himejima gyoumei #kochou shinobu #tokitou muichrou #shinaguzawa sanemi #kanroji mitsuri #iguro obanai #rengoku kyoujurou #uzui tengen #kny hashira #kny pillars

[dargeereads]

Title: Stolen: Dante's Vow

Author: Natasha Knight

Genre: Dark Mafia Romance

Release Date: September 30, 2021

BLURB

Five years.

That’s how long it took me to find her.

Five years after my world shattered, leaving me a scarred and broken man.

By then, the girl I knew was gone. In her place stood a woman. One who looked like an angel. An impossible, beautiful angel.

I killed for her. Soaked my hands in the blood of those who hurt her and rescued her from hell.

But hell has a way of following you. Becoming a part of you. Maybe the only part you recognize.

I had every intention of bringing her home. Setting her free.

I swear I did.

But the men who stole her all those years ago weren’t done with her yet. They’d stop at nothing to get her back. And I’d kill any man who tried to take her from me.

She calls me her avenging angel.

But I know the truth.

I’m no angel.

Because even as I tell myself I’m protecting her I know one thing for sure.

I am a monster, too. No better than them.

Because just like them, I’ll never let her go.

Author's note: Stolen is Dante Grigori's story and although a standalone, would be better enjoyed after reading With This Ring and I Thee Take.

ADD TO GOODREADS

PURCHASE LINKS

AMAZON US / UK / CA / AU

B&N / KOBO / APPLE BOOKS

GOOGLE PLAY

EXCERPT

Five years.

Five fucking years. That’s how long it has taken me to find her. And the only reason I did was word circulating about Petrov having been duped.

Felix Pérez going into hiding.

Bastard.

I climb out of the car at the entrance of The Hudson Hotel. An icy drizzle pelts me as I adjust the collar of my coat before looking up at the penthouse windows more than twenty floors up.

She’s here.

It’s her.

It has to be.

The second SUV comes to a stop behind ours and as Matthaeus flanks me, three more men fall in line behind him. I push my hands into my pockets and walk toward the entrance. A bellman opens the door. I don’t miss the widening of his eyes when the light from a passing car dances across my face. Maybe it’s not my appearance that’s got him freaked. Maybe it’s my entourage. Because we look like trouble.

And we are.

I make my way to the concierge desk and give the attendant my name. Well, not my real name. The name of the asshole who paid extra to get his turn early in the night. Before she’s used up. He’s dead now.

The attendant can’t quite keep eye contact. I blink, watching him as his eyes move over the eyepatch, the deep, still angry X-shaped scar across my cheek. I let him look. Let him clear his throat in embarrassment as he makes a point of rearranging his desk while asking for identification.

I pat my pockets. “Guess I forgot it.”

He finally forces himself to meet my gaze, his neck and face flushed.

“Envelope,” I say, holding out my hand. I don’t have time for this buffoon.

“Yes, sir.” His hand trembles as he hands the envelope over. He wants me gone and I can’t blame him.

I check my watch. We have to time this exactly right. I walk toward the elevators followed by my men. As if to oblige us, the doors slide open just as we get to them, and we step inside. I rip the envelope open, press the key into the slot marked Penthouse and let the doors slide closed. Matthaeus sets the black duffel bag on the floor, unzips it and hands each of the men an automatic rifle. They have suppressors in place, although there’s really no way to muffle that sound. But if all goes to plan, it won’t matter.

An upbeat tune plays in the background as I stare at my own face in the mirrored doors. I make myself look. Make myself see. I wonder if she’ll be scared when she sees me.

My phone buzzes. I reach into my pocket, take it out, scan the text. Cristiano telling me the soldiers are in place, both inside and outside the property. Chopper is on its way, and they’ve secured our exit.

If I can get out.

If.

Because he thinks this is a shit idea.

But no, it’s not if I get out. I have no intention of dying tonight. Not until I’ve killed that fat fuck Petrov. Not until I’ve buried my knife in Felix Pérez’s gut. Not until I have their blood and the blood of anyone else who touched her on my hands.

Then, I can die.

Only then.

He reminds me again of Petrov’s soldiers nearby, the distraction we arranged only giving us minutes inside the suite. He asks one more time if I know what the fuck I’m doing.

I text him a pirate emoji, along with the middle finger, then silence my phone. He’ll be pissed but this is mine. What happened to her happened because of me. What happened to all of them happened because of me. All while I simply walked away.

So, as the elevator approaches the penthouse, I crack my neck and pull my pistol out of its shoulder holster. Then twist the silencer into place and hold the weapon at my side.

Because tonight is the beginning of their end.

Tonight, I take back what they stole.

ALSO AVAILABLE BY

NATASHA KNIGHT

AMAZON US / UK / CA / AU

B&N / KOBO / APPLE BOOKS

GOOGLE PLAY / AUDIO / PAPERBACK

AMAZON US / UK / CA / AU

B&N / KOBO / APPLE BOOKS

GOOGLE PLAY / AUDIO / PAPERBACK

AUTHOR BIO

Natasha Knight is the USA Today Bestselling author of Romantic Suspense and Dark Romance Novels. She has sold over half a million books and is translated into six languages. She currently lives in The Netherlands with her husband and two daughters and when she’s not writing, she’s walking in the woods listening to a book, sitting in a corner reading or off exploring the world as often as she can get away.

AUTHOR LINKS

WEBSITE

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NEWSLETTER

INSTAGRAM

#Natasha Knight #Stolen Dante's Vow #release blitz #Give Me Books Promotions

[bangchanstudio]

[*serendipity*] My Roommate is a Ghost | Han Jisung [ch.4]

pairing: han jisung x reader (fem)

genre: *this can be read as a one shot* college au, parallel universe, mild angst, mild fluff, smut (but it’s cute and romantic..ish? maybe?)

tw: sex ?

word count: 2.8k

plot: it’s been weeks since you’ve seen Jisung in your reality and weeks since you’ve slipped into his. That changes when you wake up in his bed.

ch.one | ch.two | ch.three

note: so i wrote this as i was listening to sappy love songs, hence why it might not be so “smutty” but it’s still sex. if you’re curious i wrote this listening to Never Not by Lauv (this version) and serendipity: slow dancing in the dark by smyang piano (this version)  [originally by bts’ jimin & joji respectively] *bonus songs. I decided to leave 3 songs sprinkled in with links in the ** symbol if you want to listen to something as you read (the songs may or may not cross over depending on your reading speed). i really hope you like it, this has a piece of my soul as i am a full believer that han jisung is a helpless romantic at heart. i’m still trying to figure out how i want to go about this series, so i apologize if it seems weird or not very clear. feel free to let me know if there’s a direction you hope this will take. ps~ if you want to be notified when i update this series then send me a message so i can add you to the tag list :)

taglist: @lewsr​

“Hey stranger.” You mumbled trying to hide your smile. Time wasn’t moving and hadn’t been since you woke up in Jisung’s bed.

Well, technically, it had been moving judging by the slow and steady sunrise. The rays slipping past the spaces in between the blinds and highlighting Jisung’s hair as if he had a halo and the light illuminating his skin as you traced it lightly with your finger tips.

He is real.

“You’re really here.” Jisung said smiling down at you, his arm was under your head, it felt strong and secure. Safe. “I thought it was just a dream.”

The sound of his voice made your skin vibrate. Truth be told, you were afraid of going back to sleep after waking up in his world. He was someone whom you’d only met a few times, but something about being with him made you want more of him. He was warm and caring. He felt like something new, something you had never experienced before and something you didn’t want to let go of, at least not yet.

“What, like a nightmare?”

Jisung laughed, “No, like a fantasy. The most beautiful dream. One I’d never want to wake up from.”

His eyes met yours again, lovely; like melting burning dark sand. His hand cupped your cheek, thumb brushing your skin. It was soft.

The sudden realization and high probability that you looked like an absolute train wreck you hid your face under the blankets, only peaking over slightly causing Jisung to laugh again.

“Ah, what’s wrong? Don’t be like this. I missed seeing your face and you’re just going to hide now?” He tried pulling the blanket down but you held on tightly with both hands shaking your head.

“No, I forgot to take my make up off last night so I probably look like a freaking zombie.”

“Do not.” He replied rolling his eyes. “Let me see you!”

He lifted himself up onto his elbow wrestling you playfully for the blanket, pouting out his cute pink lips.

“Jisung, please! I look terrible, I swear!” He was stronger than you, it would only be seconds before he won this tug of war. You knew for a fact that at the least your lips were still half stained red.

The giggles that left your lips sounded strange to you, they felt like genuine happiness.

Jisung got on his knees next to you and pulled one final time, finally succeeding in ripping the blanket from your grasp.

His smile widened seeing you shrink into yourself as you tried to curl into a ball and disappear, your hair sprawled out delicately over his white pillows. He wandered if maybe you were destined to find each other, in this strange and beautiful way. Ever since that day when you walked in on him in the shower he wondered if you were just a dream. He continued to think that every time you found each other. Yet here you were again, in each others presence. He wasn’t sure if heaven existed, but he concluded that anywhere he found you, he would count that as his heaven.

“You’re so.. beautiful.”

The pink that rose in your cheeks at his words couldn’t be hidden, nor the way you instinctively nibbled the side of your bottom lip when you got shy or nervous. The heat on your face increased when you remembered you fell asleep in the black supreme shirt you borrowed from him the first time you found yourself in his world.. and only in that.

Jisung leaned over you, the sudden closeness made you stiffen. His eyes drifted down to your red stained lips and you couldn’t help but try and swallow the knot that was forming in your throat.

“Wh-What are you doing?” Your voice shook a little more than you intended.

“Can I kiss you?” His eyes darted back up to search yours.

He intimidated you in a way you were not used to, but it was in a way that still made you feel safe.

You nodded. He took your face in his hands, meeting his lips with yours in the softest way possible. They felt like heaven or maybe it was hell in disguise?

The kiss quickly deepened as your hands made their way from his hair down to his chest, then to pulling his waist to your body. His skin was so warm and smooth. His chest was so firm and sculpted as was the rest of his body. Even though you knew he had a great body from the time you walked in on him showering, he still looked so much better up close.

He is real.

“You’re real.” He mumbled as he moved down from your lips to your neck leaving open butterfly kisses, his tongue grazing your skin leaving a hot trail. You held on to the waistband of his boxers, knuckles white. How crazy did you have to be to sleep with a boy you didn’t know well? But you felt like you did know him. You felt like he was you, and you were him.

He shifted himself to fit between your thighs, propping himself up over you, “Is this okay?”

You nodded.

“Say it.. please.” He looked.. afraid? Maybe it was worry…

“This is fine, Jisung. More than fine, it’s.. perfect.” His eyes lingered on you, studying all of your lines, the way your eyes traced his face, the way your lips parted slightly, waiting for him to continue whatever it was that he was doing.

A song** suddenly cut through the tension making you flinch slightly. Anything startled, you even a soft song.

“Fuck, (Y/N) I’m so sorry. It’s my alarm.” Jisung reached over to grab his phone from his nightstand about to turn it off.

“No it’s okay-“ you reached out to grab his arm before he could click stop. “I like this song. Let it play.”

“Okay, if you say so.” He shrugged, tossing his phone back onto the table before returning to you.

The warmth of his body covered you as your hands made their way back into his hair pulling his lips back to yours. He smiled into your lips, chuckling slightly as one of his hands gripped the back of your thigh, pulling it up to his waist.

There was never a time you wanted someone more than how you wanted Jisung at that very moment. There was a desperation that was starting to rise from your core and a fear of losing him again. Your fingers clenched his hair pulling it a little harder than you probably meant to, but the moan that escaped his lips made you clench your thighs. A move that didn’t go unnoticed by Jisung.

“Oh?” He raised an eyebrow, “Did that turn you on?”

The sultriness in his voice was oh, so deadly yet oh, so lovely.

“Maybe, just a little.” You breathed staring at his neck; avoiding his eyes, tightening your legs around his waist again.

He responded by pressing his hard on your core. The heat must have been obvious because he cocked his head to the side looking at you amused, eyes wide.

“Are you naked under my favorite t-shirt?” He asked pressing his tongue into his cheek and smiling widely, like a boy who just found a dirty secret.

“So what if I am?” You replied grabbing his hand that was on the back of your thigh and dragging it up to your bare ass.

He laughed at your boldness, squeezing it before giving it a slap.

“I like that.” He said before taking the shirt off in one quick swipe.

Just like that you were bare before him, your arms instinctively covered your boobs. His eyes burned trails down your figure, your chest rising and falling quietly, but heavily at the anticipation that was building. He continued to look you over and over again, memorizing every line and curve.

“Are you okay?” You asked, maybe he was second guessing how far you should go.

He blinked, as if waking up from a trance. “Oh, yeah I just want to remember this. You.”

He was sitting back on his knees from between your thighs, looking down at you. His hands made their way up from the base of your torso up, slowly, stopping to trace the tattoo that was under your boob.

“’Serendipity’?” He asked tracing the word over and over again with his fingers. “What made you get this tattoo?”

You shrugged, admiring the warmth of his gaze. “I was praying for a serendipity moment.”

“It suits you” Jisung said, leaning down and kissing your tattoo before grabbing your arms, asking with his eyes if he could see you fully.

You let him.

“You’re my serendipity.” He breathed, “You’re so beautiful.”

His lips came down tenderly on your chest at the center before wandering down to one of your boobs, biting and sucking to leave a bruise.

You moaned, whimpering slightly at the beautiful pain, “That feels so good, Jisung.”

“Yeah, baby?” His teeth were at your neck again, leaving another beautifully painful mark. “Can I make you mine for a moment?”

The question came as a whisper in your ear, his breath tickling your skin and sending a shiver down your spine. The only response you could offer was to try and pry his boxers off with your feet, which he accepted as a green light. He reached over into his nightstand and pulled out a condom, tearing it open with his teeth.

He pulled his boxers off in one motion and rolled the rubber on quickly. His size made you bite your lip and look away shyly. You could only be so brash. Jisung looked at you while he adjusted the condom and smiled.

“You look so cute when you’re flustered.”

You squeezed your eyes shut, laughing nervously.

“You’re too hot for your own good.” You admitted, forcing yourself to look up at him again, and you couldn’t help but return his smile.

“I’ll try to tone it down from now on.” He replied, pulling your waist up to meet his, placing his member at your entrance.

“No, don’t. I like it.”

“If you say so, songbird.” He looked at you hesitantly before adding, “If you want to stop, tell me and I will.”

The look in his eye was stern, you nodded. “I will, Jisung.”

He looked down, watching as he slowly pushed himself into you. The feeling of his tip entering made you ball your fists into the bed sheets, your teeth biting down on your lip, a nice kind of pain.

“Fuck, you’re so tight.” He breathed, as he stretched you out. His hands dug into your waist and you were sure they were going to leave marks, but that was okay, you didn’t mind. They would leave behind evidence that,

He is real.**

His member felt so warm inside of you, he filled you up in no time with a grunt. His rhythm started out slow and meaningful, maybe even passionate. The way he bit his lip, closed his eyes and rolled his head back with the slow build up of friction.

You looked at him desperately trying to burn this moment and image into your mind. The way his breathing started to sound heavy, the way your back felt on his clean bed sheets, the smell of his cologne that hung on them, on his pillow where your head laid and on his skin. The way the song played softly and matched the pace of his thrusts. The way your wetness sounded as he thrusted into and out of you.

You whimpered as the friction started to cause a knotting at the core of your stomach.

“Jisung,” you whined a little breathless. “Kiss me.. Please.”

He hovered over you instantly, bucking into you suddenly harder and deeper. “Whatever you want, my songbird.”

His lips were sloppy and wet, but lovely. You dragged your nails down his spine causing him to arch slightly at the sting moaning out,

“Fuck, that felt so good.” He chuckled, voice raspy. “You’re mine right now.”

“I’m yours,” You agreed dazed but the heat was starting to overtake you, “Fuck, Jisung, I think I’m gonna cum.”

His pupils dilated at the way you moaned his name, his hips crashing into you faster and harder.

“That’s okay baby, cum if you need to. I want to see you cum on my cock.” He moaned, pinning his hand in yours above your head and the other holding down your waist.

The sound of his skin meeting yours echoed throughout the room, his moans mixed with your whimpers. Your voice calling out his name, and his yours.

“I- I don’t think I’m going to last much longer.” He admitted almost seeming embarrassed. 


“It’s okay, baby, I- I’m so fucking close.” You moaned. It felt as if he was stealing all of the air from your lungs. There were little stars starting to dance across your vision. The knot in your stomach was getting tighter and tighter.

“Fuck, Jisung.” You moaned throwing your head to the side, hands clenching his biceps, as your orgasm crashed into you, “Fuck!” the heat coming in waves.

Jisung moaned your name one last time, before slamming his hips into you again, releasing his load into the condom.

“Fuck,” His breathing was heavy as he buried his face into the crook of your neck riding out his orgasm, making you shake against the friction.

“Ah,” You whimpered as Jisung bit and sucked on your neck again. His moans against your skin made you shiver. Your skin felt so incredibly cold and hot at the same time. His breathing in your ear was a sound you didn’t want to forget or the way the weight of his body felt on top of yours, crushing you but you didn’t want him to move either.

“You’re real.” He breathed again, looking up at you from your shoulder.

“You’re real.” You echoed. 

Would this ever be normal? Could this even last? You remembered the days of cursing the lovebirds and swearing to the gods that you’d never fall in love. Why was the one person you felt yourself falling for from another reality, from another world? There was a sense of dread starting to flow in your veins, quickly overtaking the beautiful bliss you had been feeling only moments before.**

“Baby, what’s wrong?” Jisung felt your wavelength change somehow.

You tried to say “Nothing, I’m okay,” but you couldn’t trust yourself to speak without crying. Why were you suddenly feeling sad? It’s not like this is your first time having sex but something about this time made it feel like destiny. A destiny that may end whenever the universe decided it would end.

“Did I hurt you?” Jisung asked worry etched all across his face.

You shook your head viciously, “No, I just... I just don’t want to lose you.”

It felt so stupid to say out loud. You don’t know him, you scolded yourself. Stop being stupid and acting like he is yours. But the look Jisung gave you mirrored your own fears.

“I don’t want to lose you either.” He admitted, brushing loose hair strands out of your eyes. “I’m afraid of letting you go right now because I don’t want you to disappear.”

You chocked back a sob and Jisung wrapped his arms around you tightly. His embrace was so tight you could feel his rapid heartbeat against your chest. Burying your face into his shoulder you allowed the pent up tears to fall slowly, fingers digging into his back as you held him with all your strength.

Minutes past and you stayed like that without moving. Afraid that the moment you let go of each other it would all be over. It felt like you were holding your breath the whole time and he was your lifeline.

Eventually, Jisung rolled over to relive you of his weight, but you never let go of his embrace.

“I think I’m falling in love with you, (Y/N).” His voice was barely audible.

There was nothing you could say.

“I’m falling in love with you too... but I’m scared.” You admitted, fingers grazing his bare chest.

“I’m scared too” He replied, rubbing your arm, cheek resting on your head. “But I think we just need to live for the moment.”

You chuckled at how easy that sounded. “What do you mean exactly?”

“We can’t control fate or destiny, but I promise the moments we find each other, those are the moments where I will be completely, totally and only yours. No matter how long or short the moment may be I want to spend it with you. Feeling you, touching you, kissing you, laughing with you, crying with you, eating with you whatever it is I’m totally yours. Maybe not forever, but for that moment, I’m yours.”

“Deal.” You weren’t great with words, but Jisung’s vow gave you a spark of hope. He was right after all, you don’t control fate or destiny, only how you react to it and live through it.

Though, that wouldn’t stop you from praying and hoping that he could be yours forever, because

He is real.

#han jisung #jisung #skz #stray kids #han jisung scenarios #jisung scenarios #han scenarios #han x reader #jisung x reader #han jisung x reader #skz x reader #stray kids sceanrios #skz scenarios #skz hard hours #skz smut #han smut #jisung smut #han jisung smut #mriag #mriag4 #serendipity

[oh-mother-of-darkness]

asks (26)

@spickerzocker​ said:

hey there! just a heads up that i tried to click on the "why i don't ship" explanation link in your faq and it says that there is no post with that url/it's generally broken. also your "a conversation about recovery" thing is beautiful and hurts in the best way and i love it. have a nice day!

Yes, I intentionally took that link down awhile ago, and last night I went and updated some of the tabs on my blog. Here are my basic thoughts:

I wrote that link years and years ago, while I was first navigating the internet and while I was still figuring out important things about my own identity and opinions. I ran my blog differently back then, but by the end of the first few months, I knew I was uncomfortable with shipping. 

As people began to interact with me and my work, I told them over and over again no, I don’t want to talk about that, and I don’t want to write about it, and it makes me uncomfortable. I don’t think that was a common position to take at the time, so it wasn’t what people expected from me. 

During those years, I felt like I had to justify myself and give a valid explanation. I wrote that post explaining why I had that boundary, and I put it in a place where anyone could find it.

I said no when people asked, let them make jokes about it, and made jokes about it myself in response. As time went on I got more and more exasperated when I had to repeat myself. I wrote definite rules into my ask box, request tab, and FAQ. People still asked. I wrote it into my description. People still asked. 

The truth is yeah, there’s a pretty simple explanation for my discomfort. It makes sense. It’s easy to understand, and most folks think it’s a “good enough” reason to leave me alone. The difference between young-me and current-me is that I no longer feel the need to justify myself. 

None of y’all need to know why I set the boundaries that I set. My explanation isn’t relevant, and I’m not obligated to give it. I said no. That’s enough. 

I think a good number of folks remember my explanation from the past, and I don’t mind that at all. There may be a time where I talk about it again, in a more appropriate context, so I guess we’ll see.

That’s a lot of information in response to a very helpful ask. Thanks! The link is gone now, and I’m so pleased that you enjoyed the fic :)

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Anonymous said:

U suck

Kenza sent this anon as a joke. She’s right, and I thank her. 

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Anonymous said:

I'm a doctor and ive seen it all.....but the milk fic made me gag

Excellent

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@wingedskyes said:

Ah. Wait. I wasn't on anon....uhm. oh well. It's fine. I like milk and am not ashamed. 😆

I don’t think I received another message from you actually, but I too like milk and I’m glad we’re on the same page

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@thelittleredheadedmusician said:

To add to the milk discussions: my best friend from home and best friend from college have each finished a gallon a milk by themselves within 2 days.

I do that too, every once in awhile. When the milk craving hits it’s a gallon a day

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Anonymous said:

"TIM! POUR HIM. A GLASS OF M A L K!"

Hold on I have to google some things

Yeah this is funny

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Anonymous said:

I have read that milk fic three separate times and every time I’m laughing just as hard as Tim and dick by the end it’s just so excellently executed and builds so perfectly that by the time dick cracks I’m ready to go too and I just lose it it’s amazing I love it

Awww anon I’m so pleased :)

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@the-smartass-under-the-mountain said:

Just wanted to drop by and say your recent fic with Tim antagonizing Damian with increasingly outrageous milk concoctions had me giggling. It was so cute and refreshing to see Dick enjoying Tim's little prank. And Bruce's reaction to just... walk away was fantastic!

Thank you! I’m always so thrilled when y’all think the jokes hit

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@njtheboywonder​ said:

I havnt really enjoyed a fic in years, but i stopped to read ur fanfic with tim drinking milk just to fuck w dami amd it made me smile. Thanks, for writing it.

Oh that warms my heart <3

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@bruciewayneisbatman​ said:

Tim Is totally the guy who would drink ridiculous amounts of dalgona coffee to annoy damian, according to that fic.

Had to google that one, but I guess so huh

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Anonymous said:

(diff anon) but that birthday fic was so good oml and you have opened my eyes as to the batfam in quarantine this is such a Concept

We’re all here dying..... together...

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Anonymous said:

Happy birthday! 🎉 or belated! 🎂 thank you for being in the fandom. 😊

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Anonymous said:

To anon! Sorry. I forgot to add that! Anyway, thanks to them we get a lovely fic. I hope you have many more birthdays! 😊

Message for you anon

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Anonymous said:

Your writing gives off good vibes

Hear that guys I “passed my vibe check.” Is that what the youth say these days? I am an elder now and I do not know

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Anonymous said:

finding your blog while being relatively new to batman fandom is such a bliss. your batfam content especially is *chef's kiss* amazing.

Thank you my darling :) I’m glad you’re here

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Anonymous said:

Best line in a fic? Hard to pick just one, but this particular one from "Just Desserts" by fyeahbatmanandrobin on Tumblr is one of my faves: “Anyone else would be hard-pressed to provide the particular brand of excitement you bring to my life, Dami.”

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@noisypaintersong​ said:

For the line thing: "I don't doubt it. Bruce Wayne, the unexpectedly normal guy wrapped in a mystery wrapped in a superhero wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a fake socialite wrapped in a businessman wrapped in a secretive billionaire." He paused. "…You're the seven-layer burrito of Gotham," he pondered. - Barry to Bruce in 'Of Friends and Foes' by Paganpunk2 on FFN. It's one of the funniest things I've read someone say to Bruce LOL

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@kirakats​ submitted:

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Anonymous said:

“I do know that according to everyone else, there is no chance, no future, no universe where I stay a hero.” Describes my frustration with the way DC treats Damian so accurately. Let the kid be a hero dammit.

Thanks! That’s really helpful. I’ve got a decent answer to my question now. 

@kurawastaken​ submitted:

So this is Kenza retaliating against me for the milk fic. I very much hate tomatoes and specifically ketchup. This photo (1) is a nightmare and (2) fulfills its intended purpose.

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Anonymous said:

I love your blog!!!

And I love you 

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Anonymous said:

quick question: how do you think jason reconciles with the fam?? i think in the comics they kinda just reboot and now he’s on better terms. but like what conversations happened, yknow??? (you’re doin great work by the way, it rips out my heart but it’s great)

This is an amazing question, and I’ll be thinking about it for the next bit, I think. That would be a really interesting topic to explore in depth

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@angel-gidget​ said:

*hugs you real tight* would you please send this to the first 10 people in your dash? Make sure someone gets a hug today and stay safe!

Oh thank you for the hug <3

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Anonymous said:

I hadn’t been aware of that Memphis petition, but I live in Memphis too (Altho I know you said you just grew up there so you may not be living here currently haha) so ig I just wanted to say thanks for bringing it to my attention!

!!!

I’ve been in Texas for six years now, ever since I started school, but I’m still in and out of Memphis for family purposes. Love the trash heap of my birth 

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@damianwaynerocks​ said:

hey! any chance you know of any other dc heroes around damian’s age?

Sure! You could try Billy Batson, Jon Kent, or Maya Ducard

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Anonymous said:

hi! i don't know if it's okay to leave anons like these but ive been feeling down because my country has passed a bill that deprives us of lots of human rights freedom and i want you to know that i just found your blog through the damian/bruce + justice fic and it comforted me. im slowly going thru your works and so far they are all comforting. i love your stuff, thank you.

Philippines? I’ve heard some things, and I’m real sorry y’all’re going through that. I don’t know that there’s anything I could say about that to help, but I hope you’re finding joy somewhere

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@awesomeness-ofgaybitches​ said:

Tumblr hates you. The links in your bio and to your fic masterlist don't work on mobile. I'm sorry.

FUCK

#I'd like to also take this opportunity to note that at this time #I have blocked 7 people for variations on #okay no ships but what about sailboats?? #but what about the TITANIC #here's a picture of the bat-boat tho #guess what kids it's not creative or funny #and I explicitly said that jokes will get you blocked #I follow through #asks