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#Fake AH Crew

I was going to put this in a long elegant post but my brain is fried so please just imagine Fahc Jack stealing that one ruined ‘restored’ fresco painting of jesus just to gift Fiona because “Look Fiona, it’s a meme” and Fiona just bursts into tears yelling how that gift is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for her. “It’s so fucking ugly I love it so much” she says as she immediately and proudly hangs it in the heist planning room for all to see and gaze upon

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alright. i also had another anon ask the same thing about Jack so im going to play around with what we know about Team OG. instead of sticking with the term Gents, this is what i propose

The OGs

  • Team OG which refers to their original status but also used in the slang term of Oh jeez it’s Jack and Geoff
  • Both are largely out of the game and have wisely invested their money so they can live their lives out in peace, but still. If you want to try something sketchy in the city, the both of them will probably hear about it and might set you straight
  • The Lads know of OG since OG invested in their chop shop/custom garage after Jeremy lifted Jack’s car to which Jack was pretty impressed and Geoff was killing himself laughing about it because god Jack loves her cars and it pissed her right off that one of her brand new models immediately got jacked
  • Suffice to say, there is some level of respect between the Lads and OG
  • Geoff does more forward facing business deals to ensure their money is safe, while Jack has taken it upon herself to sort of become a mentor to the others?
  • Jack knows Fiona because Gavin is paying for her to steal something from Jack and Geoff’s place so it becomes a thing where Fiona would steal things from the two teams, constantly playing them against each other
  • Trevor and Alfredo also pull pranks on Jack but more for shits and giggles than anything else. It frustrates her a lot, but she’s also like the one person the Twins call when they know they’re in deep and need a hand out

Post Team (before we get started I do not know much about the editors. i know of Sara and Larry so that’s what we’re going to talk about)

  • Sara and Larry are 2 post-graduates who are really just looking to get some work to manage their student loans. They’re not even into the criminal lifestyle. They just get dragged into it because of circumstances
  • Sara actually gets a job as Geoff’s PA. All on the table business, nothing shady. Technically. But sometimes it’s not just Geoff she’s dealing with but the other teams. Fielding calls from them, weird requests when she’s asking why they need a meeting with him.
  • “Can you tell him that the, uh, golf cart is in the pond?” says Gavin. “I’m real sorry about that.”
  • “Okay, so we’re going to need an advance on that loan,” Trevor says and then in the background Alfredo adds, “Yeah and also $10,000 more dollars.”
  • “Yeah, I just want to apologize Geoff for, uh, hacking his computer like that,” Matt says. “The Baby Shark song was funny in hindsight, but uh, I’m ready to admit when I know I’ve lost here.”
  • Larry gets a job with the Lads! They need help with their administrative work and between the three of them, they don’t have one college credit to spare, so Larry gets to work on the back end and front end for their website so they can book clients easier and also keep track of their finances! Because that’s important when you’re running a chop shop/custom garage.
  • The chop shop is managed after hours but sometimes Larry doesn’t leave until late as the Lads come rolling in with a nice sports car, all three dressed head to toe in black. Jeremy says, “You didn’t see nothing.” And hands Larry a hundred dollar bill even though they already pay him more than enough. He doesn’t ask questions, and they pick him up donuts and coffee the next day.
  • Larry and Sara often talk to each other on business matters because the Lads will get Larry to make calls for them
  • They use these calls to gossip and complain about the oddities of their employers, but these jobs pay. And money talks.
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i want to take a new look at the Fake Ah Crew for various reasons and explore different origin stories, connections, and ideas. so upon thinking about this for a little while (five minutes) i’ve decided what if instead of one crew, it’s more like a network

The Lads

  • starting off with something familiar, we got Michael, Gavin, and Jeremy
  • they’ve been in the game the longest and work well as a trio
  • Michael and Jeremy came here together as part of a bare knuckle brawler ring and worked their way up to some serious money
  • they met Gavin when he broke into their apartment one night by complete accident, thinking he was breaking into someone else’s apartment but was short by one floor
  • They operate a custom garage as their front and because of this Jeremy has taken this as his excuse to paint all his vehicles purple and orange

The “Twins”

  • Using their slight physical similarities to their advantage, Trevor and Alfredo work as serious con men and grifters

  • One of their favourite pulls is the Thai Gem job where they convince some socialite in the city that they have access to some precious gems and jewelry from some far away land. they mock up a few fakes, sell them to the socialite, and run before they’re found out

  • They’ve recently set up shop in Los Santos because their job often catches a lot of attention, so they hop from city to city, pulling jobs, taking on names and never really settle down until they get to this side of the country

  • They nearly get busted by the Lads because Trevor and Alfredo think Gavin might be an easy mark but he’s very much not and this lands the Twins in a sticky situation where they need to talk their way out of being busted by the Lads before the Lads decide to tip off one of the Twins’ many enemies where they are

The Gal Pals

  • At the moment, the gals consist of Fiona and Lindsay

  • Fiona met Lindsay at the LGBT night club and immediately fell in love with her. She was particularly taken by the colours of her hair that night and they got to talking

  • Lindsay is a street racer and quite competent behind the wheel of a car, but is quite hopeless when trying to navigate the streets of Los Santos when not on a closed course

  • Fiona is a courier. She gets what people need. Sometimes it’s a dog from some asshole ex’s apartment, or it’s documents from a computer in a bank.

  • Once Fiona has the goods, Lindsay acts as the getaway driver with Fiona giving her instructions.

  • On their own they can manage, but together they’re something to be reckoned with


  • The elusive Myatt, or Matt Bragg as he’s known legally, is more an eyes in the sky type person than a feet on the ground type of guy

  • He’s been pulling pranks on the Lads from afar for years now, catching wind of their latest job and getting into the security system as soon as they arrive and watch them run around like chickens

  • Most of his jobs are for screwing around with them. It gives him great pleasure

  • When not being a thorn in their side, Matt is working on getting as much blackmail material on his hands as possible, but for his own reasons. A crooked politician is asking for dirt on their opponent? Congrats. Myatt just leaked your tax return. A pharmaceutical company is looking to bury a new study about one of their medications? Not only has it been published, but a dozen other studies have also surfaced

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