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Safe Haven: tftaws!Bucky Barnes x fem!reader - Chapter Eleven (final chapter)
chapter ten - Chapter Eleven: Safe Haven
Plot: Y/n and Bucky enjoy their time off in Brooklyn and make decisions about their future.
Warnings: FLUFF, very little angst for once, talk of torture, reference to suicide, open ended plot twist that I'm not sorry for...all the fluff, seriously...
Word Count: 7.3k
A/N: Here we are...part of the journey is the end, and we've arrived. Even though there's another a/n at the bottom (with an important announcement so don't tap out too soon) I want to iterate just how thankful I am for the response I got on this series. I had the most amazing time writing it and loved getting to meet and connect with so many of you through it. ENJOY!!
It had taken all the strength Bucky had in his soul to knock three times on Yori’s door. He didn’t know what reserve he had had to tap into to actually make his long-hidden confession but once the words had fallen from his lips, he felt both freed and all the more burdened. Watching his friend’s eyes become overtaken by heartbreak, the desperate, confused utterance of ‘why…?’ By the end, Yori wouldn’t even look at Bucky. Bucky didn’t blame him, he was surprised that the man wasn’t yelling him out of his apartment. Instead, he calmly told Bucky to leave, surely holding back the majority of his emotions until he was by himself. The door shut on their friendship and Bucky was by himself on the other side of the door once again, drawing the shaky breath he’d held while he was inside Yori’s place. Out of every person he’d gone to see, every heart he’d had to crush, this one had hurt the most. In the dauntingly long hallway, his eyes sought out the gift the universe had given him, so undeservingly.
His guiding light.
Bathed in the blue light that flooded through the dirty windows of the aged building, Y/n stared down at her feet as she paced. For as open as they’d become with one another, Bucky found himself unable to ask her to accompany him to his last opportunity to make amends. The two of them had become so skilled at reading each other that with one look in his saddened eyes, Y/n had squeezed her phone into the pocket of her jeans and stood by the door waiting for him to ready himself. Bucky was starting to make peace with his past, but he still didn’t know what he had done in his wretched life to have such an angel in his life.
“Hey,” she greeted soothingly, turning to face Bucky as he approached her, “How’d it go?”
Bucky wasn’t ready to speak yet, he wasn’t even sure how he could describe what had just transpired. He simply sighed and allowed Y/n to wrap him in her arms in the embrace that was quickly becoming his favorite place to be.
As I woke with a groan, stretching my arms over my head, I was immediately aware that one side of the bed was cold. I blindly reached a hand over and felt around for Bucky’s missing body, sitting up when my search was unsuccessful. I blearily scanned the bedroom, our suits laying in a pile that had been kicked to the corner of the desolately furnished room. The few articles of clothing I had gone to the nearest department store and purchased for my impromptu stay in New York still lay folded on top of Bucky’s dresser. It didn’t dawn on me until that moment that I was beginning to spread across Bucky’s apartment without even trying.
It had been four days since the Flag Smasher’s final stand and while the world may have been spinning, mine had never been more steady. Bucky and I hadn’t left his apartment for more than running necessary errands. Other than that we’d spent the time enjoying our slice of domestic heaven learning about one another. I had discovered that Bucky was a good cook but only when it came to breakfast food. He had found out that I needed to sleep with the windows opened slightly for background noise. I had learned that his Spotify consisted strictly of music from the ’40’s and nothing else, contrary to what he’d told Sam about diving into Marvin Gaye’s discography. He’d learned that I got cold easily which led to both me stealing his hoodies and being on the receiving end of many bear hugs. We could tell what the other would do in combat or how they’d handle a concerning matter, but it was finding out the little things about James Buchanan Barnes that made me fall a little bit harder for him with each revelation.
The unlocking and opening of the door followed by quiet footsteps alerted me to his presence. I heard a few muffled noises before the floorboards outside the bedroom creaked, the door opening directly after. Bucky was careful and nearly silent as he came into the room until he saw that my eyes were open. We shared a lazy smile as he approached the bed.
“Did I wake you up?” he asked.
I shook my head in reply, he came to kneel at my side of the bed and pulled the hand he’d hidden behind his back out revealing a bouquet of daisies. “Just when I thought you couldn’t get any cuter,” I chuckled, reaching out to grab the bouquet, “I don’t think anyone’s ever bought me flowers.”
“That’s a crime,” Bucky said as he stood up, shedding his leather jacket as he walked around the bed, “In my time, you always brought a girl flowers on the first date. It was just what you did.”
“I guess we can consider my little extended stay a first date,” I dipped my nose down to smell the flowers, “Although I’m pretty sure in your time you wouldn’t allow a girl into your bed so soon.”
Bucky snickered to himself, “A gentleman would never let a lady sleep on the floor. And selfishly,” he tugged his second layer, a grey long sleeved shirt off over his head, and looked down on me lovingly, “I sleep better with you here.”
It was true. He’d told me how he’d only used the bed once since he’d moved in, having slept on the floor instead. I was familiar with the phenomenon, Sam had gone through the same thing when he’d returned from the service. I’d told him that if he had a nightmare and needed to move out to his living room, I’d join him with no hesitations. Shockingly, it hadn’t happened yet and we’d slept in a peaceful tangle of limbs each night that I’d been with him.
Kicking off his boots, he slipped under the duvet and sat up against the headboard, looking over at me and patting his jean clad thigh. I set the flowers down and crawled over to him, sinking down onto his lap and sliding my hands around his neck.
“I like this,” he complimented me with a smirk, tugging at the material of his henley that I was wearing, “Looks better on you than it ever would on me.”
“Clearly you’ve never seen you,” I scoffed, I’d also learned that the man had no idea just how attractive he was, “What were you off doing?”
“Grocery store,” Bucky answered, gesturing to the sidelined bouquet, “Florist. Dr. Raynor’s office…”
“Oh, I didn’t know you had a session this morning.”
Bucky took a deep breath, his hands firmly secured around my waist and his thumbs rubbing at my hips. “I didn’t,” he answered, “I, uh, I crossed off all the names in my book. Thought I’d drop by and let her know.”
I gave a breathy laugh, “All of them?”
He nodded, “All of them.”
Surprised and proud, I placed my hands on his cheeks and pressed a sweet kiss to his lips. “I never doubted you for a second” I said softly, our lips almost touching, “I’m proud of you.”
Bucky gave a small smile, not yet ready to take as much pride as I could in his recovery. I could tell that he was lighter, while his personality was silent and stoic there wasn’t as much sadness lurking beneath it. To those who knew him, the difference in his behavior was visible. The days that I’d been in New York were the happiest I’d seen Bucky since I’d known him.
“So…” I sighed, my hands sliding down to his shoulders, “No more therapy sessions, no more battles to be fought…What do we do now?”
The dreaded question that we’d been avoiding since we’d isolated ourselves from the outside world. There was no doubt as to whether or not I wanted to make it work between Bucky and I, but we hadn’t even discussed what “it” was. What should have unfolded over the course of a couple months had happened as a crash course over two weeks. I didn’t regret it, I just needed to know where Bucky’s head was at regarding our future.
“Look,” Bucky averted his gaze downwards, “I’m not…I haven’t done this in a long time and I can’t promise that I’m gonna be good at it. I can’t even promise that I’ll know what I’m doing some of the time. But,” he shyly raised his eyes to meet mine, “I want this. I want you.”
His earnestness was so genuine, I thought my heart might burst from the emotion in his ocean blue eyes. “Bucky, I don’t want perfect,” I said, “And I’m pretty sure that a 106 year old with a robotic arm and a girl who can fly using blue energy from inside her wouldn’t even know what to do with perfect,” I earned a single laugh out of him, “Whatever we have right now, that’s what I want. I want to fight with you by my side and make a difference in the world, then I want to come home with you and teach you to cook something other than pancakes.”
He furrowed his brow, “What do you got against my pancakes?”
“My point is,” I giggled, my hands drifting back up to each side of his neck, “I want you exactly as you are. I haven’t done this in a long time either, I thought that after my dad died I was too broken to ever let myself be happy like this and you know that I’m coming in with more baggage than before. You’re not the only one who doesn’t know what they’re doing. But there’s nobody else I’d rather figure this out with than you.”
The long stare he gave me was reminiscent of the first moment we’d been alone together, standing before the 200 foot drop in Munich. It was the first moment I’d appreciated his beauty, maybe it was the first seed planted in what was now a full-blown relationship in the making. This time, instead of sassing me with those hardened, slightly amused eyes, he surged forward and kissed me, cradling the back of my head in his Vibranium palm. I returned the kiss with just as much fervor, gripping the tight blue t-shirt tightly in my fists. Unlike the kisses we’d shared at 1AM in the kitchen of my house, this one carried a different weight. It was a promise of a future. Movie nights introducing Bucky to the classics that he’d missed. Lazy mornings in bed turned passionate as our bodies surrendered to one another. Protecting each other on whatever battlefields we’d inevitably end up on. Frustrating fights over something we’d inevitably admit was stupid to argue over. Whispering soothing affirmations to help Bucky come down from a violent nightmare. I could taste it all, the good and the bad, in that one kiss and I wanted every bit of it.
“Two weeks…” I said after we’d parted, shaking my head in amazement and laughing, “That’s all it took.”
“Crazier things have happened,” Bucky reassured me with a smile, running his hands up and down my back, “My folks always said they knew in a week and they were together for almost forty years.”
I bushed my lips against his softly, basking in the euphoria of knowing that the two of us belonged wholly to one another. To think that I’d been willing to throw all of it away mere days ago, I was ready to deprive myself and Bucky of the love we’d craved all our lives. I thanked God that my resolve to stay away had weakened long enough to let Bucky in because now, wrapped in his strong arms with his lips begging for a deeper kiss, I knew that I had something truly spectacular in my hands.
“Well, since this is official,” Bucky said, a little breathless, “There’s something you should have.”
He took his hands off of my body and reached behind his neck, pulling off one of his dog tags. Understanding what he was doing and the significance of it, I moved my head to allow him to place the necklace over it, the cold metal of the ball chain settling against my neck. The tag fell between my breasts, I picked it up and read Bucky’s name, his service number, the name of his sister, their address and his birth place. He’d given me, a part of his future, a piece of his history.
“Bucky…” I whispered, not trusting my voice enough to come out steady.
“A lot of soldiers gave one of them to their girls before they shipped out,” he recalled, watching me examine the piece of metal, “At least I know if I ever do ship out anywhere, you’ll be with me.”
I bit my lip and smiled, looking up at him with misty eyes. When the first tear fell down my cheek, Bucky was quick to wipe it away and did so with a smile of his own. After all the pain we’d both suffered through in life, we were finally allowed tenderness. Our hearts were scarred, our bodies worn, but no amount of trauma could lay a hand on the way we felt about one another. There’d be many more fights, some with forces bigger than the ones we’d spent the last two weeks taking a stand against. But at the end of the day, I had Bucky, my safe haven to come back to.
“It’s getting late,” I observed after a few minutes of sweet silence, the morning hours were slipping away from us, “Are you hungry? I can make us something.”
“Yeah, but,” Bucky’s hands found my arms and he rubbed his palms against them, “Let’s stay here just a little while longer…”
A grin spread across my face, one that I was finding only Bucky could bring out in me. “Okay,” I replied, settling my face in the crook of his neck and resting against his chest, the only place I wanted to be.
A FEW DAYS LATER
“You ready, Barnes?”
“This is the most dangerous mission we’re ever going to face.”
“I wouldn’t have come if I couldn’t handle it.”
“Then why are you sweating?”
“Well, at least I know you’ll never lie to me. You suck at it,” I smirked just before smoothing out the shoulders of his jacket, “Follow my lead, you’ll be fine.”
Bucky blew out a breath, his cheeks loosing their puff as he exhaled, “Here goes nothing…”
I gave three sharp knocks on the door before entering, seeing the familiar face waiting in a chair by the window. “Hey, Mama…”
My mother smiled deeply at the sight of her daughter, alive before her. “Baby,” she whispered as she slowly rose to embrace me, “Oh, you’re here.”
“I’m here,” I smiled, trying to fight the tears threatening to fill my eyes. My mother had been my first call after the battle in New York, realizing that my face was flashing across every news channel in the country alongside Sam and Bucky. This was the first time I’d seen her since before I’d left Louisiana with Sam.
“And you brought someone?” she asked over my shoulder, pulling away to wipe her cheeks.
“I did,” I turned around and looped my arm through Bucky’s, who was looking vaguely nauseous, “Mom, this is James.”
Bucky stuck out his gloved hand towards my mother, “It’s wonderful to meet you, Mrs. Y/l/n.”
“Wonderful to meet you too, James,” she responded, shaking his hand and looking over to me, “I’ve been waiting a long time for Y/n to bring somebody home.”
I forced a chuckle, “Thanks, Mom…”
“Well, I’m honored that I’m the one she chose,” Bucky beamed, his bright eyes seeking mine out.
“Well, sit down,” my mom gestured to the two free chairs in the room, “I want to hear all about how you two met.”
Bucky and I exchanged a nervous look as we pulled up our seats to join her by the window. How were you supposed to explain that you’d fallen for a 106 year old who just happened to have once been the world’s deadliest assassin? “Um…James is one of Sam’s friends from the military. He came with us to Munich and things just sort of,” I slipped my hand into one of Bucky’s that sat in his lap, “Happened from there.”
“We didn’t like each other much at first, but,” Bucky chimed in, rubbing his thumb over the back of my hand, “She definitely snuck up on me.”
“Oh my,” she looked at me amusedly, “How’s Sam taking this? Has he threatened you yet, Bucky?”
“Yeah, I, uh, got a text from him the other day, and it read something like ‘I’ve got access to government weapons, don’t make me use them.’”
I covered my mouth and snorted as my mother got a good laugh herself, “You didn’t tell me that.”
Bucky shook his head, a small smile on his lips, Sam and him had been getting along swimmingly since his last visit to Louisiana. But no friendship could eclipse Sam’s overprotective nature when it came to his family, it was only a matter of time until Bucky was on the receiving end of its ugly side.
“Truth is,” Bucky turned his gaze to my mother while keeping a soft grip on my hand, I could feel his nerves radiating through his touch, “I’m crazy about your daughter, ma’am, I think she’s the most amazing woman I’ve ever met.”
Mom sighed, an ear-to-ear grin painted across her face. It was the same one I’d seen when my sister had first brought her now husband home to meet us. “I can’t tell you how happy it makes me to hear that, James,” she replied, “I’m looking forward to getting to know you more.”
“Are you sure you don’t want to come with us?” I questioned, “It’s been so long since the whole family was together.”
“I wish, but I’m a little too tired to make the trip there,” Mom answered, settling into her seat a little more, “You don’t need an old lady there slowing you down.”
“That’s ridiculous,” I gently pushed back, “But since Sam and I are back home for a while, we’ll make sure to bring everybody up one of the weekends.”
“I’d like that,” she smiled.
A phone buzzing interrupted the conversation, Bucky let go of my hand to reach into his jacket pocket. “It’s Sam, probably wants an ETA,” he announced, rising from his seat and looking between both me and my mother, “Sorry.”
Both of us shooed him out of the room to take the call, turning back to one another once he was gone with shining smiles. “Honey…”
“I know…” I tried to hold back a giddy laugh threatening to erupt.
“He seems wonderful…”
I shook my head, semi in disbelief that things had turned out the way they had. “You don’t even know the half of it, he’s just…I’m crazy about him.”
“That much is obvious,” Mom gestured to my face, “You haven’t stopped smiling since you walked through that door. I’ve never seen you this happy. Just one thing…” I furrowed my brows as her smile turned to a knowing smirk, “Did you honestly think I wouldn’t know who he is?”
I sighed, leaning forward in my seat and propping my elbows on my knees. “We weren't trying to hide it, he just doesn’t like to advertise it. Once people know, they usually can’t look past what he was. But, Mom, we’ve been glued at the hip for the last two weeks and I can promise you, what you’re seeing is what you’re getting. I wouldn’t be with him if I thought there was any chance he could hurt me. He saved my life and so many others last week...”
“Sweetie, you don’t have to try and sell me on him,” Mom said soothingly, reaching out to touch my knee, “I trust your judgement and I also know what happened to him, it was tragic. The fact that he has a second chance at his life makes me happy, especially since it’s with you. Watching the two of you, how at ease he is with you…And those eyes,” she stopped to chuckle, “The way he looks at you is something special, it’s something magical. The two of you fit.”
Eventually I would tell her the whole story of how Bucky and I came to be, but it was better saved for another day. If she only knew how challenging it had been to get to something so simple and how Bucky and I valued each other all the more for it. “He fought for me, Mama,” I said with tears brimming, letting out a laugh, “Literally and metaphorically. And I just couldn’t let him go, he’s everything I’ve wanted but what I thought I could never have.”
Mom placed a hand on my cheek, “You deserve him, my love. After everything you’ve been through, you deserve happiness.”
And for the first time, I believed her. I believed that through my suffering, I had played a small part in helping Bucky through his. We deserved something more than what had happened to us and we had found it in one another.
“Your father would be proud of you,” Mom said, her face flashing with a different emotion than joy for a brief second.
“I’m not sure about that…” I mumbled, dodging her eyes in favor of staring down at my hands, a different reaction than I’d ever had when talking about my father.
“Sweetie,” she coaxed me, tapping at my hands until I looked back up at her, “Do you…do you know something?”
My heartbeat started to quicken as I struggled to contain the information I was withholding from my mother. It was taking everything I had not to tell her that her husband had been a part of one of the cruelest organizations the world had ever seen. The pain must have reflected in my expression.
“Yeah,” she whispered, biting her lip and closing her eyes, “You know…”
She sighed, sitting back in her chair and supporting her head in her hand. “I didn’t know anything about that part of your father’s life when I married him, he didn’t like to talk about his time in the ‘service’ and I never pushed it…It wasn’t until the night that he died, before he left the house, that he sat me down and confessed it all.”
“He…” I moved to the edge of my seat, “He told you?”
“Mmhmm,” she nodded, a distant look in her eyes like she was transported back in time to that very moment, “I didn’t know how to process any of it, how could I? This man who I’d shared my life with and he’d made his living off of inflicting pain on innocent people. Hours later, he was gone and any chance to delve deeper into it was gone too. It’s taken me a long time to come to terms with everything, but I made it. You’re free to draw your own conclusions, Y/n, I’m not telling you how to feel. All I’ll say is this,” Mom drew a breath before continuing, “Your father’s guilt over what he did, to Bucky specifically, overwhelmed him. He told me how HYDRA manipulated him, a young and ambitious man, into coming to work for them, lying and telling him they were creating a better world with their work. He thought he was fighting for what was right…I’m not making excuses for him, believe me, I’m simply telling you what he told me. Do you remember when he’d wake up from a nightmare?”
I nodded grimly, the shrieks of my father’s always strained vocal cords still haunted me decades later.
“Do you remember what he used to cry when he woke up?” Mom asked.
I silently shook my head in reply, when I’d be awoken by my fathers blood curdling screams as a child, I’d always bury my head under my pillow in an effort to block it out, shedding tears at knowing I couldn’t help him.
My head perked up, the word was familiar to me after hearing Zemo call Bucky the same thing when we were undercover in Madripoor.
“Of course by the time that your James was free, your father had been dead for over a decade but,” Mom paused, looking out the window as memories hit her, “Your father’s guilt over what he did ate away at him every day. As far as you went, he told me that the reason he wanted to keep your powers hidden was because he was afraid HYDRA would come for you. It’s the reason I moved us to Delacroix after he died, I didn’t want to take the chance of somebody finding you. Dad didn’t want them to make you a weapon the same way they made one of James. But honey,” she took my hand, “He believed you could do great things, truly. One of the last things he said to me was that our family was the one good thing he’d done in life.”
Everything that I’d thought and everything I’d never thought had been revealed to me. My father’s crimes could never be erased, but some part of me felt satisfied knowing that he knew what he did was wrong. He’d been haunted day and night by Bucky, the man who I was completely head over heels for. In some way, it felt poetic that Bucky and I had ended up together. I couldn’t magically heal his trauma, but for every bit of torture my dad and countless others inflicted upon him, I was now there to shower him in the love and safety he deserved.
“Have you…forgiven him for what he did?” I hesitantly asked.
“You know, after all these years, I’m still not sure what forgiveness looks like in a situation like this,” she admitted with a small shrug, “We weren’t affected, yet his past put us in danger, especially you. And now, seeing the man that he was paid to hurt and how much joy he brings you, it’s bringing up a lot of emotions I thought I’d buried. I know he regretted what he’d done with his whole being and I believe that, but I still question why he didn’t leave sooner. I wish I could give you a better answer but-“
“Mama,” I squeezed her hand and pushed back my tears to help her, “I’ve had this information for a week and I’m still spinning, I can’t imagine what it’s like to sit on it silently for this long. I was hellbent on keeping this from you but I’m actually relieved that I don’t have to hide it…” I took a trembling breath, “Dad did a lot of things wrong in his life, but I have a chance to do a lot of good. I’ve talked to Sam and I’m going to keep working with him, I’m done living with my hands tucked under my legs. I want to make the difference in the world that Dad thought he was making.”
“I think you’re off to a pretty good start,” my mother replied, “I was terrified watching you fly around New York, but I’d also never been prouder of you.”
A knock on the door followed by Bucky sticking his head through it broke us from the topic. “Am I interrupting?” he asked, his eyes widened slightly as he worried.
“Not at all,” my mom said cheerily as she slowly rose from her seat, “I don’t want to keep you two any longer when you’ve got somewhere to be.”
I tightly embraced her and placed a kiss on her cheek, “Love you,” I whispered.
“Love you too, sweetheart,” she replied, gesturing afterwards to Bucky who made his way over to her and allowed himself to be hugged by her, “Take care of my girl, James.”
“I will,” Bucky promised, pulling back to give a nod full of conviction.
Once the two of us had shut my mom’s door and were back out in the hallway of the nursing home, Bucky noticed the slight puffiness of my eyes. “Happy tears or sad tears?” he asked as we walked down the hall.
“‘I don’t know’ tears,” I replied with a small smile, weaving my fingers between his gloved metal ones. “But well done, Sergeant. I’d consider that a successful mission,” I finished, receiving the laugh I loved so much and a kiss to the side of my head. I pressed my lips to the place on his shoulder where I knew underneath his layers Vibranium met his skin, one of his favorite places to be kissed. My phone went off then, alerting me to a text, I pulled it out of the pocket.
“Bucky…” I muttered, stopping in the middle of the hall.
“What is it?” he asked as he stepped back to join me, I held my phone out for both of us to read the ominous words displayed.
The world’s seen what you can do, come to Madripoor when you decide to use those hands for something worthwhile.
- The Power Broker
“How did they get my number?” I asked in surprise, letting Bucky take my phone to examine it closer as if he could find something I couldn’t.
“I don’t know,” he answered, handing the device back to me, “But we’re changing it immediately, you need to show this to Sam soon as we get to the house.”
“They’re not actually threatening me, seems more like a job offer than anything else that’s only going to be declined. Plus, they’re all the way in Madripoor,” I stuck the phone back in my pocket, “I’m not going to let this ruin our day.”
Bucky frowned down at me as I took his arm once again, “You’re a little too relaxed about this.”
“I’m a mutant who can make things move with her mind with Captain America for a brother and a Super Soldier for a boyfriend, I’d love to see the Power Broker try to mess with that.”
The dock was exactly how I loved to see it, packed and filled with joy.
Sam and Sarah had invited the whole town to the celebratory cookout, people of all ages flooding our corner of the bayou as Bucky and I pulled up. Sam had loaned us his truck for the duration of our stay and I was having the time of my life showing Bucky around Louisiana and there was nothing more Louisiana than a cookout with the entire community.
Bucky parked near the end of the dock and hopped out, carrying the ice cream cake that we’d picked up on our way. He crossed around the front of the truck to open the door for me, taking one of my hands and helping me hop out of the passenger side. After a dozen more reassurances during the drive that the text I’d received wasn’t worth freaking out about, he’d begun to relax. For once, he wasn’t trying to hide his emotions. I could see it plain as day on his face, he was genuinely excited to be back in Delacroix and even more excited when the familiar sounds of AJ and Cass hit our ears.
“Oh! There he is!” Bucky greeted as the boys ran up to us and began throwing fake punches at my boyfriend who willingly played along, dramatically dodging their imaginary hits. He raised up the hand that held the cake over Cass’ head and yelled to which I quickly threw an energy shield underneath his arm to protect the overly expensive dessert.
“Aunt Y/n! Can you make us fly?” AJ came up to my side and begged.
Cass backed his brother up, “Yeah, can we? Please?”
“No,” I replied, retaking Bucky’s hand and letting him lead us through the crowd, “But you can follow us with your two perfectly functional legs.”
My nephews both groaned and laughed as they fell in step behind Bucky and I. “Where is everybody?” he asked as he set the cake down on one of the picnic tables set out and removed his sunglasses.
“Uncle Sam’s taking pictures with people, Mom’s cooking and Aunt Mel’s at one of the tables,” Cass answered, his face lighting up as he got a good luck at the dessert.
“After dinner,” I said, quickly having switched back into aunt mode, “Now lead the way.”
I extended my hand toward the boys and raised them up a few inches above the ground, receiving laughter and praises in return as I moved them ahead of us and through the crowd. Along the way people kept patting me on the back or sneaking in quick hugs, they shook Bucky’s hand and thanked us both for what we’d done in New York. The only thing that confused me was how people weren’t calling me by name. By the time we made it to Sarah, I had questions.
“There they are, America’s Power Couple,” she announced, coming out from behind the booth where she’d been chopping to hug us both.
I pulled back to lower the boys back to the ground, “Do you know why people I’ve known almost all my life are suddenly calling me ‘Sapphire?’”
“Did you not check the internet at all when you were in Brooklyn?” she raised an eyebrow before pulling out her phone from her back pocket and pulling up Instagram, “Ever since the night of the fight, people have been referring to you as Sapphire. People are posting pictures of you, trying to get interviews with you, kids are even dressing up like you!”
“Oh my gosh,” I mumbled as I scrolled through the hashtag containing the name, seeing all the proof of Sarah’s words before my eyes. Dozens and dozens of various types of photos displayed my signature shade of blue, “Bucky, look!”
He took the phone out of my hand, a smile spreading across his face soon after. “That’s my girl,” he said proudly, handing the phone back to Sarah.
“You wanted the superhero life, you got it,” my sister laughed before returning to what she was doing, “Sam’s doing pictures and there’s already been people asking if you were gonna be here so I imagine they’re gonna want some with you.”
Bucky grabbed my hand and led me around to where a line had formed, spotting Sam as the destination. As soon as he caught a glimpse of us, he held up a finger to the crowd and broke away from them. The three of us exchanged hugs, me internally laughing to myself at the fact that two weeks after saying they never wanted to see one another again, they were now brothers in arms. Sam took my hand and tugged me towards where everyone was gathered, “Lotta people have been waiting for you, Sapphire,” he smirked.
As the day went on, the three of us did meet and greets with nearly everybody. At one point I found Bucky casually talking to Sarah with AJ, Cass and other neighborhood kids hanging off his vibranium arm. People had gathered around me as well asking to levitate them, something that provided entertainment for everyone. We ate, we laughed, at one point I caught Sam and Bucky watching the sun set over the Louisiana waters. I couldn’t resist the temptation to sneak in between the two and was received with an arm around each of my sides. We’d fought a shared battle along with our own separate three and now that they’d all been put to rest, we could take a minute to enjoy the freedom we’d worked so hard for. The future was unknown, but I knew that if we’d made it through the mess of a week we’d had together, there wasn’t a whole lot that we couldn’t make it through.
When the sky darkened, the dock lights went on and the party kept going. Someone had brought out a Bluetooth speaker and there was now a section of the dock that acted as a makeshift dance floor. I was seated at a table with Melanie watching the show, baby Alexandria fast asleep in her arms.
“So…Bucky,” my sister said teasingly teased.
I let out a loud sigh, “Bucky.”
“He’s perfect for you,” she smiled, “I’m glad you brought him home.”
“Me too,” I scanned the dock until I spotted my boyfriend, engrossed in a conversation with Sam, “He fits right into the family.”
“I’ll say, the kids love him. Max and Sophia have been following him around all day, I’ve never been able to get the baby to sleep as fast as when he held her…”
I chuckled, “Yeah, just when I thought he couldn’t get any more attractive, you stuck a baby in his arms.”
Mel snickered at my reaction, “Yeah, pretty sure every woman on the dock snapped a picture of that.” The two of us burst into laughter before hushing ourselves as to not wake the sleeping infant. “Hey, Sapphire,” she nudged my shin with her foot, “I’m proud of you.”
“Well, that’s a far cry from how you felt last week,” I commented, remembering the fear in my sister’s voice from our phone calls in Riga.
“I’m always going to worry about you, but once I actually saw you do your thing,” she breathed, “I was just in awe of how you would risk your life to save all those people. It would be a waste to not put your gift to good use.”
I leaned my head against hers and brushed a finger over Alexandria’s thinly haired head, appreciating the sweetness of the moment. Once a slow song came on the speakers, I watched as Bucky stepped away from Sam and made his way over to our table. “Can I steal your sister away for a dance?” he asked Mel.
“Steal? You can keep her,” I shot my sister a faux smile while she watched on with a grin as I took Bucky’s outstretched hand and let him lead me away.
“Gonna show me some more Madripoor moves?” I jested as we walked across the dock.
“That was not dancing, although I did enjoy it,” Bucky replied, giving me a wink that could have melted me into a puddle, “I’ll show you what real dancing is.”
I recognized the song as a version of ‘The Way You Look Tonight’ and realized Bucky waited until now to show off any moves in his arsenal because it was probably the first song he recognized on the playlist. He encircled my waist with his flesh arm and took my hand in his Vibranium one, pulling me so close that there wasn’t any space left between us. He began to sway us slowly to the beat of the song. I rested my cheek against his, breathing in the scent of him mixed with the bayou evening air. As far as I was concerned, dancing in the arms of the man I was somehow lucky enough to call my own in the place I loved most in the world was the perfect end to a perfect day.
“Alright, I give…” I relented softly, close enough to his ear that I barley had to speak louder than a whisper for him to hear me, “Your version of dancing is better.”
He gave a gentle laugh, the sweetest sound, and rubbed at my waist, “It’s more about the partner than it is the actual dance, think I’ve got the best one.”
“You certainly know how to make a girl blush, Sergeant Barnes,” I replied just before he spun me out of his arms and back into his body, “When’s your flight back to Brooklyn?”
Bucky cocked an eyebrow, “Already tired of me?”
“Never,” I shook my head with a genuine smile, “Just trying to soak in all the time I can with you before you go back.”
“About that…” he trailed off, turning his gaze to the various other couples dancing around us, “I was thinking of maybe extending my stay. I mean the scenery’s nice, good food,” he looked back to me, “Decent people.”
The grin that I was fighting was starting to make itself very apparent, “What are you saying?”
“Well,” Bucky shrugged and looked away again, “I mean, I’d need to find a place, hopefully nothing too expensive or else I’d have to find a roommate and even then, it’d be hard to find someone I like enough to live with…”
I’d ceased our movements to show just how serious I was, searching his face to try and tell if he was joking or not. “What do you say, doll? You think you can put up with me a little while longer?” he asked with a smirk.
I exhaled happily and pulled him down to my lips, kissing him with all the excitement that filled my veins at the prospect of him staying. When we finally pulled away, I cradled his cheek in my hand. “I will put up with you for as long as you want,” I beamed, pecking his lips once more.
“I’m glad,” Bucky kissed my temple, “It was either telling you this or the other thing…”
“What’s the other thing?” I asked, thinning my eyes at him in expectancy of another surprise.
Bucky drew a breath, taking a few seconds to steady himself for whatever he was planning to say. “Well, I was going to tell you that I love you but,” he clicked his teeth, “Now that I think about it, it’s probably better saved for another time,”
The earth ceased to move and spin at a dizzying pace all at once, his blue eyes never more truthful than they were in that moment.
“I think you’re right,” I said over the lump in my throat, holding back the tears that had come all to quickly, “Best to save that for another day, wouldn’t want to make a hasty declaration or anything...”
“That’s what I was thinking,” Bucky replied plainly, continuing our charade.
I gave him a watery smile, bringing one of my hands up to run through the hairs at the base of his neck. “I love you too,” I whispered.
Both of Bucky’s arms wrapped around my waist, clutching me as tight as he could without actually injuring me as our lips met. I encircled his neck and relaxed into him completely, feeing aglow with the love that I could finally admit to feeling. Both of us smiled into the kiss, feeding off of the mutual joy of what was unfolding before us. Was it crazy to commit in the ways I was committing to a man I’d known for only two weeks? To some, yes. But ‘some’ hadn’t formed the bond that Bucky and I had over the short span of time it had taken for me to fall in love with him. We had seen the best and the worst of each other, rising and falling with one another’s waves and learning what made the other tick. I wanted every part of him, the good, the bad, the traumatic and the pure. The quick decisions that would raise eyebrows made sense to us, and that was more than enough reason for me to see each one through.
“Thanks for not giving up on me,” Bucky said softly after we’d parted, pulling back to admire me.
“Thanks for not letting me give you up,” I returned, staring up into the eyes that had first captured me. The eyes that I’d get to stare into each and every day.
Since the night we’d connected on the jet ride to Berlin, there was some way Bucky had made me feel that I couldn’t put a name to. Something I couldn’t understand at the time but I was fully aware of now. Bucky felt like home. And with our bright future ahead of us, wrapped in his arms dancing underneath the Louisiana stars, I’d never felt more at home.
A/N: I'm not crying, you're crying. GUYS. IT'S OVER. WHAT THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WITH MY TIME NOW? I want to thank every single person who liked, commented, reblogged, sent messages and asks and supported this silly little fic I thought up one day after watching TFATWS. As someone who is super insecure about their writing, seeing it well received was a boost to my confidence to keep running with this. I've loved getting to write this and give it to you all and can't wait to write more for you. I'm adding my new taglist link for anyone who would like to be added, it's separated by the characters I write for and you can choose which ones you'd like to follow. THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU A MILLION TIMES AGAIN. I LOVE YOU ALL 3000!!
Safe Haven taglist: @tanyaherondale @wanniiieeee @asoftie4bucky @edencherries @i-reblog-fics-i-like @ttalisa @gcfty @withyoutilltheendofthismess @rinaispunk @weirdowithnobeardo @felicityofbakerstreet @godlyhufflepuff @eternalharry @voguesir @mizz-kraziii @okayline @smellmymisunderstoodfluff @wanderin-stories @nicklet94 @intricate-melody @aesthethickks @stumbleonmywords @simplybarnes @21bruhs @lostinwonderland314 @superbookishhufflepuff @kaelyn-lobrutto24 @zozebo @fandomxreaders @kittengirl998 @sarai-ibn-la-ahad @i-know-i-can @x-judyjude-x @thebi-valkyrieofvalhalla @buckverse @living-that-best-life @haphazardhufflepuff @citlalireedus @lindseyrae20 @missstef23 @qhbr2013 @sebby-stann @bluemoon-icecream @iixbella @lets-love-little-me @abitofeverythinggg @itsnottilly @sltwins @mads-weasley @hart-failure @natdrunk @nctma15 @obsessedwithjustaboutanything @patdsinner33 @rosebucketbarnes @tylard-blog1
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Notes from the AHWM Explanation Livestream
This will be long, so fair warning! If you're on computer, you can press the spacebar to skip this post if you want!
There was CG smoke for the bomb
The last shot was running after the bomb goes off, filmed during the day
Many cursed images
(0:56 - Guns Blazing) November 5th = gunpowder treason & plot (a reference)
Ethan is the one yelling during the run
Helicopter/Car was filmed in a place formerly known as Spiderwoods (spiders, snakes, and bugs everywhere)
Mark's patented method to get rid of snakes is to tell them to fuck off
There was big black snake near the library
Most of the choices were pretty evenly split in the video data
The guy who owned the field in Helicopter/Car also owned the helicopter
It was hard to get the cameraman to know that the camera is an interacting character
They filmed up to 10 pages a day
Prison was the first 2 days of shooting, as well as the part with the most characters/extras (12 people)
Mick gets typecasted in roles of authority
The Prison location is a functioning mental hospital
John was a Prisoner, first mate, and is a realtor IRL
There is no "why" to recording this to keep a broad audience and have fun after Mark was in a depression and made WKM
The Gregory Brothers / Schmoyoho made 2 renditions of I Don't Wanna Be Free (which is on Apple/iTunes/Spotify)
The musical was a production/recording nightmare on the 2nd day
They had 20 minutes max. to learn each segment; they had a choreographer helping them learn the dances
The original vocals didn't have the accent
Mark had to do the vocals, acting, blocking, etc. in 30 mins
Mick was supposed to cross frame during the top-hats-part, but they had already recorded it; the producers weren't comfortable telling Mark "no" yet, so they had Amy do it
The smashed bricks were styrofoam; Mark was typed to a rope that was pulled
The director of photography was Phillip J Roy; he took a pay cut to work on this project
Yancy's sleeve tattoo is the whole map again
Yancy's tattoos are Tiny Box Tim and Mark/Dark across his knuckles; those were Makeup's ideas
The Musical was only 1/4 of a recording day
There was 3 work weeks of shooting (15 days)
Day By Dave made a remix
Yancy was named "Prison Mark" until the fight scene started to be made in post-production, where he needed a name; Mark liked Yancy and Amy was very against it originally
Yancy killed both of his parents; Mark knew people were gonna fall in love with him anyway
"Yancy stans, go, march on"
Yancy has an emoji bandaid
Heapass (canonically) makes an appearance in Thanks and also Yes Please; he had "Heapass" on a cast, but it was on the wrong side from the camera
Holt Boggs (the cell guard) is an amazing man; he was overqualified ("soft hands")
The cell was in a green-screen soundstage, so there was more improve
Yancy was supposed to be hidden in the ceiling or beside the bed, but under the bed turned out better; he's hidden under the bed the whole scene
The Red Gemini was the camera that they used for this project
Mark just runs off frame in Thanks and also Yes Please
The audio-only part was very convenient for filming and fitting for a 1st-person perspective
Yancy's talk at the gate was Mark real-acting & the late shot of the 1st day of filming, which made all of them realize that the project could actually work
Yancy WANTS to be in prison; he knows all the ways out - he'd leave if he wanted to
The items in the box are more representational achievements
Mark needs our help to promote AHWM, through liking the video(s), commenting good things, and spreading the project; the performance of this dictates the ability to make another similar project
Mark worked for FREE for 5 months, taking no cut of the budget for himself
"Yancy is just Prison Mark with amnesia" "There could be a time-skip there; it could work"
Robert Rex, "a god walking amongst mere morals;" has always wearing the same thing; Mark didn't know that he was going to do different accents
Amy is the hand with the feather-duster
The Warden's desk moves into the hallway after a smash-cut
Mick's line had to be rewritten so it can be ambiguous; you can only tell if you were looking
The Warden embodies "big strong hands," something Mark writes into dialogue a lot (along with "trust you me"); everytime he touches something it cracks (his desk, Yancy's shoulder)
Pulling stuff from behind Mark's back was on-the-spot
The dirt joke was a prop-person and Mark throwing buckets
Mark helped Holt Boggs make a short video
The truck in Prison was a one-take-wonder; they actually bashed the truck through the wall in a such a cartoony, perfect way
The Bob/Wade skit was a reference to Prop Hunt
Mark comparing the disappointment of people not liking the video to a cup of dirt under the Christmas tree
The lid to the sewer says "a heist with markiplier"
The sewer was in an actual sewer treatment plant, which took about a week of filming; some parts were flooded so they couldn't film there; this place was scheduled to be torn down
Mark forces us to choose the Light Tunnel first
Cranbersher, GrittySugar, and Lixian collaborated for the Light Tunnel; it was originally going to be live action with a green-screen and a pre-made raft; Cranberser offered when he had a 3-month break from other projects
Amy notes that Mark did a lot of "falling"
Mark had to carry a 200 pound man and a heavy camera rig to carry Y/N
There was poison ivy, snakes, spiders, etc. on the island
The Game Grumps voiced the aliens; Erin originally was meant to play the Warden & Danny was meant to play one of the guards
Many roles fluctuated due to scheduling
Getting abducted is a reference to ADWM ("not again!")
Mark loves MatPat's scenes and acting (Build a Shelter)
There were so many mosquitos near the Cave and the actors couldn't put on bug spray because they had to preserve their makeups
There was a giant hole in the Cave from which grasshoppers rained down
They were a mile into the cave; they weren't able to staff them for 3 days, so they recorded for 2 days and had fo cut some shots
The Cave freeze-frame was unscripted; the camera director didn't tell cut and it was too funny
The Hermit was originally supposed to be Jacksepticeye but scheduling errors were in the way
Mick was originally supposed to be Crazy Ed
When the sound-guy didnt have a sound effect, one of them riffed something at the mic and it was modulated to fit as best as possible
Mark's camera loses signal/battery power
Mark has done the hot-wire-while-moving in Car before (van videos)
The blue flash during Car is you from the future/another timeline
Mark was actually driving the car; someone flashed the blue light so it was a bit dangerous
Tyler and Ethan make appearances as Zombies
Tyler actually let Mark hit him with a rock
There was a dead beaver in the shed during the Zombie Apocalypse
The Zombie Apocalypse shots were in VERY hot weather
The barricaded front door but very open back door was intentional humour
Ethan's zombie handshake was thought up on the spot
Moe was the man screaming from the fire and zombie attack, making everyone behind the camera laugh
Rosanna Pansino sings opera & speaks Chinese
The Scientist had to be broken up (the cuts are in the gunshots)
243 is a chemical identification symbol in an actual laboratory, nothing meaningful to the plot
The code leads to the AHWM website
What's truly inside the box is the real timeline, which is the team making the project
The room where the monitor was in (Amy, script manager, etc.) was locked out and no one could see what was going on, only hear it through headsets
Mark threw 2 dummies (main video, Absolutely Not!)
Chica likes to climb through the cords underneath Mark's desk
The true/canon ending is For The Greater Good, which leads to ADWM
SodaPopIn hasn't really done this before, but he went with it because he was told Mark was nice; he continued even during harsh weather, many planes, and a long take/monologue
The sandwiches are a callback to ADWM
The montage endings were inspired by the ones Amy made for ADWM
There was never any time set aside to get photos for the montages, so they had to continuously get pictures
Catherine makes an appearance in the Warfstache bit
Warfstache is just a meta joke > you respond by writing in the comments as a survey, producer Catherine is more powerful than the video-editing, ringing the bell for notifications
They rented the same place for the Warfstache bit that they used to film all the other previous Warfstache bits
Dark inserts himself wherever he feels like being
There is charity (#TeamTrees) merch for each of the egos/Mark characters in this project (including the new ones)
Edge of Sleep's last episode aired yesterday (as of the stream - 6/11/19)
A "reverse" charity livestream is happening soon
The next project(s) are already in the works
SPREAD THE WORD ABOUT HEIST
Amy originally wasn't going to work on this project until they went to Texas; she became Creative Producer once Mark put himself into too many places
Iba originally auditioned for the man in the burning truck, but his voice was so good he became the seer/guide
The project has been "cooking" since May
The next project would be a completely different project, not a continuation
SPREAD THE WORD ABOUT HEIST
Regular uploads start again tomorrow (7/11/19)
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top five fics of 2020
i was tagged by @zukka-soulmates to post my five favorite works I made this year.
Rules: it’s time to love yourselves! choose your 5 (ish) favorite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc.) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought into the world in 2020. tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want (fan or original) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome works!
(these are going to be in no particular order because i’m indecisive)
1. plum blossom
confession: i actually started writing this fic before i even finished watching atla for the first time. finishing this fic was what motivated me to finally watch the last few episodes (which i had been putting off bc i didn’t want it to end). i was expecting it to be around 5k words, but i just kept writing more and more, and i actually liked what i was writing while i was writing it, which is not always the case for me. it also got way more attention than i ever expected it to (at the moment, it’s my only fic to cross the 1000 kudos threshold and it has almost 200 public bookmarks, which is absolutely insane to me). before i wrote/published this fic, i’d always wanted to write one of those really long oneshots that ended up being 15k+ words bc i admired that people could even do that, so i’m proud of this fic for that reason. the other thing i really like about this fic is that while it is technically a zukka fic, i ended up spending a lot of time in it exploring the friendship between mai and zuko, as well as the friendships between zuko and many of the other main characters in the show, and i had a lot of fun doing that.
2. my calamitous love & insurmountable grief
i got a lot of comments on this one from people saying they were impressed that both the prose and the poetry parts of the fic were equally good, but honestly, i wasn’t too proud of the prose part. i am, however, pretty proud of the poems. my favorite line (which several people commented on) is definitely “could the world ever mourn for us, my love?” from hope wasn’t meant for us, and that was actually the first line i came up with for that poem. that poem was also the first sonnet i wrote that i don’t actively want to set on fire, so that’s cool too. i’m also a little partial to the end of star-crossed - “and i am only me” because i think it highlights how differently sokka views himself from the way other people (zuko) view him. sokka thinks he’s inferior to all his friends because, well, he’s only sokka. but only sokka has half the world leaders wrapped around his fingers and could single-handedly save or destroy the world if he just. realized. how important he is to the people around him.
3. it’s nice to have a friend
this was the first mailee-centric fic i wrote, and i wrote most of it all in one day. i think i’ve said this before, but this fic is one of the few that just. went exactly where i expected and hoped it would go, and i think accurately portrayed the tone and mood i was going for. i really liked the last scene in chapter three with the snow, and i’m also pretty proud of the ending line, which is nice, because ending lines are important to me and i have gotten stuck on endings so many times because nothing i come up with is good enough. also, the beginning of chapter two actually paved the way for the next fic on this list
4. (no sweeter innocence than) our gentle sin
this fic is a monster. i don’t know what else to say. it’s 25k words long and i wrote it all in three days, listening to chloe moriondo’s cover of take me to church basically the whole time. if that cover was on spotify, it would have made my spotify wrapped just outright embarrassing because i probably listened to that song two hundred times in the span of three days. it started as an exploration of how the agni kai between zuko and ozai might have affected mai and ty lee (hence chapter two of it’s nice to have a friend being the starting inspiration), but it turned into... i don’t know. twenty-five thousand words of me projecting onto all four fire nation kids. and i know people get bogged down by internalized homophobia and homophobic family because it’s depressing and it’s been done before, but i didn’t really write this for anyone besides myself, and people like me, who just want to know that they aren’t alone in what they’re feeling. and it took 25k words and i still wasn’t completely satisfied with it, but i think i got a pretty good start in showing what it’s like to grow up with family whose love you know is entirely hinged on their false belief that you’re straight, and in an environment where you’re essentially taught that if you’re gay, you have to choose between everything you’ve ever known and any shot at living, or falling in love.
5. when we all fall asleep, where do we go?
last but not least, we have what i affectionately labelled my sleep paralysis sokka one shot long before i even started writing it. this idea sat in my head for weeks before i finally got around to writing it, and in the earliest stages of the idea, it was going to be a zuko sleep paralysis oneshot. i’m glad i changed it to sokka, though, because i really enjoyed writing for him. i also might have forced myself into a position where i knew i would experience sleep paralysis before writing the very last scene, so i had some ~fresh~ memories in my mind as i wrote, and i think that scene had the most accurate description because of that. i would not recommend doing that to your mind/body, but... it did help me.
(also i may or may not be thinking about writing a sort-of sequel to this that is kya ii-centric.. but i have many other wips to work on first)
tagging: @that-was-anticlimactic @tysukis @zukosaturtle-duck and anyone else who wants to participate! (of course, don’t feel obligated to if you don’t want to)
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Pierre Engvall: Rewind by Rascal Flatts
Word count: 2331
Music video link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WPcASvgb7yg
Lyrics link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2LEJRDWJYG8
Wish I could reach up and reset that sun
Reverse these wheels go back and re-pick you up
Went by so fast, oh, so sweet
Make me wanna remake a memory
“Y/N! I didn’t know you were working today,” my co-worker squeals excitedly as I walk into the quaint coffee shop.
“Yeah, my plane landed yesterday,” I inform her, pulling my apron over my head and yanking my hair out of the strap.
“How was Sweden?” She asks.
I know I could tell her so much. I could tell her about the beautiful weather and how my classes were so informative and how the culture is just so amazing.
But I also just want to tell her about one person who made the whole experience perfect.
The one person who could convince me to avoid my responsibilities and stay in that foregin nation for the rest of my life, the person who I could stare at forever without noticing the sun rising or setting.
I could tell her about how he would pick me up from my host family’s house to go to the bar at night in his expensive little convertible and it would make my host dad shake his head and laugh and my host sister smile with jealousy.
Or how he would push me on the swings at the park practically every night and would tell me all about his hockey team in Canada and funny stories about how stupid his teammates are.
I snap out of my thoughts, remembering her question. I don’t want to tell her any of those things. I feel like my relationship with Pierre is too personal to spread around- I want to remember him intimately.
“It was good. It was really, really good.”
Wish I had me a time machine
Oh, I float the moon back up in the sky
Put a cork back into that sweet red wine
Put your midnight hair back up
So you can let it fall one more time
“2012.” He squints those brown eyes that I spend too long looking into at the bottle, reading the label.
“You spent $200 on red wine from 2012?” I raise my eyebrows at him.
“Well it’s from France.”
I laugh at that and he cracks a smile, popping the cork and holding the bottle out as an offering. I hold my glass out towards him, watching as he begins to pour.
“Pierre that’s too much,” I giggle as he pours practically half of the bottle into the glass.
He laughs himself, pulling the bottle away and giving himself half of what he’s given me.
“It’s like you’re trying to get me drunk or something,” I tease.
“Or something,” he repeats, watching as I take a sip. “Can I braid your hair?”
“What?” I ask, confused by the sudden question.
“Can I braid your hair? I’ve just always wanted to try and your hair is so pretty.”
I can tell he’s becoming nervous by my delayed response so I nod, turning so my back is to him. I tug my locks out of it’s loose ponytail and ask, “Do you know how?”
“I can figure it out,” he answers. I can feel him move behind me and the Swedish music he put on to ‘cultivate me’ as he put it, becomes distant as his fingers grip my hair.
I lean back into his hands, closing my eyes and enjoying this moment of the two of us together. I don’t know how many more moments like this I’ll get. I have to leave to go back home in a couple of months and I don’t know if I’ll ever see Pierre after this.
It’s a summer love kind of thing.
His hands move to rest gently on my shoulders as my hair rests down my back.
“It’s not working,” he says in a hushed voice.
I hum in response, just enjoying the feeling of his company in mine. He lets it happen.
Untouch your skin
Unkiss your lips and kiss 'em again
“I used to be obsessed with astrology when I was younger,” I admit, staring up at the stars.
“Do you remember anything?”
“Um,” I point up at the stars and feel Pierre’s burning skin on my own as his hands slide down to grip my waist. “Do you want to know where the stars are or do you just want to fondle me all night?”
“I can do both,” he replies, planting a gentle kiss on my cheek. I laugh in response.
“Do you see that bright star, right there? Follow it down and there’s the Big Dipper. And where the Big Dipper is the Little Dipper is.” My eyes scan the sky as Pierre squeezes my waist, mumbling something quietly to himself.
It takes me a while to focus but as soon as I locate the constellation I light up. “To the right and down is the Little Dipper.”
“What about, uh, Halley’s Comet?” He questions, leaving a kiss on the back of my neck.
“Babe, Halley’s Comet comes once every seventy five years,” I tease, turning around in his arms to face him. His arms slither to rest on my lower back loosely and he leans forward, connecting his chapped lips to my own.
I will never get over kissing Pierre. Everytime we kiss it feels like the first time and I could live with that feeling for the rest of my life. He pulls back and smiles at me, brown eyes gleaming in the moonlight. Then he gives me a kiss. And another one. And another one.
So good, so right,
This is one night I'm wishing I could rewind
“I hate to end this,” I mumble into his chest. “But I have class early in the morning so I should probably sleep before then.”
“Or you could just pull an all-nighter,” he suggests, tugging me tighter into him.
I grin. “If I pull an all-nighter you won’t be seeing me tomorrow night.”
“Then let’s get you to bed,” he responds, holding his hands out to help me rise to my feet. Our hands stay interlocked once I’m stable on my feet and they stay that way during the walk to the car.
I turn back that radio dial re-open your door,
Try to talk George Strait into giving us an encore
“Oh, a gentleman,” I tease as he opens the passenger’s door for me. He rolls his eyes but waits until I’m seated in his car, closing the door and running to the driver’s side.
“Are you going to play some more of what we were listening to on the way here or are you going to switch it up?” I question.
Pierre likes to put on a Swedish singer whenever we’re in the car to educate me on how many talented people come out of Sweden. I’m aware of it already since plenty of NHL players, including him, come from this nation but I don’t mind listening to music so I don’t say anything.
“Let’s change it,” he decides, “Have you listened to Avicii at all?”
“Only the songs that they play on the radio,” I admit.
“Oh, he has a lot more hits than that.” I watch as he pulls up his Spotify, smiling secretly to myself as I see his ‘Y/N’s hits’ playlist. I didn’t even know that he made a playlist of songs that I like. I wonder if it’s songs that I said I liked or if it’s just songs that we listened to together that I said that I like.
‘Wake Me Up’ begins to blast through the radio and I comment, “They play this a lot on the radio.”
“Then you have to sing along,” Pierre demands, beginning the drive back to my host’s home.
“Only if you sing too,” I protest.
“Y/N, I don’t sing.”
“Well, then I’m not singing,” I cross my arms as if to prove my point.
He gives me a look and sighs. “Feeling my way through the darkness…”
Re-spin you around
Replay that sound
Of you laughing when we hit the ground
“What are you doing?” I squeal as he pulls my door open and tugs me out of the car.
“I didn’t know I was lost,” Pierre sings along, wrapping an arm around my waist and gripping my other hand in his like we’re ballroom dancing to the song we’ve been listening to on repeat the whole car ride. “I didn’t know I was lost.”
He picks me up, gripping my waist and twirling me around, chuckling as I squeal in surprise at the action.
“Pierre!” I giggle as he continues to twirl us around. Finally he sets me on my feet and I’m laughing so hard I have to lean into him, too high off of life and love to be able to stand properly.
I can see it now how 'bout we
Float the moon back up in the sky,
Put a cork back into that sweet red wine
He leans down, pressing a soft kiss to my lips. His lips ghost over mine as he says in a hushed voice, “I think you’re about to get in trouble.”
“What do you mean?” I ask, confused.
He pulls back, nodding his head towards the front door of my host family’s home. I follow his eyeline to see my host father standing on the porch, arms crossed, but a fond smile on his face.
“I guess that’s my queue.” I kiss his cheek, a tradition we’ve started since he first picked me up at the beginning of summer. “Thank you for the wonderful night and the delicious wine.”
“Thank you for educating me on constellations,” he teases, kissing the back of my hand.
I roll my eyes at his gentleman-like behavior, giving him a final wave before walking up the sidewalk and stepping past my host father into the house.
“Don’t say a word, papa,” I warn him lightly.
“Young love is beautiful,” he tells me, ignoring my words.
Put your midnight hair back up
So you can let it fall one more time
Untouch your skin
Unkiss your lips and kiss 'em again
“I love your hair, it’s so much longer now,” my coworker snaps me out of my daydreams once again, brushing a hand through my long locks.
“Yeah, thanks,” I tell her, pulling it back behind my shoulders. Everything in me is telling me to fight the urge but I can’t help it as I begin to French braid my hair, pretending my fingers are Pierre’s.
It seems like a pointless act because as soon as the braid is perfected, I let it go.
So good, so right,
This is one night I'm wishing I could rewind
I wanna re-fall and re-fly
Baby, re-live this night
“Do you remember when we went to that museum and saw that painting of that woman without her top on and you said that your boobs looked exactly like hers, and then didn’t show me your boobs so I could agree or disagree? The nerve,” he shakes his head.
I smile, watching him drive. I know he’s trying to get my mind off of my plane ride home and the fact that I’ll probably never see him again. Our whole relationship has been based off of teasing and lust, so he’s just helping me the best way he knows how to.
“And then you spilled your drink on my shirt to try to get me to take it off,” I continue, causing him to nod.
“I wanted to see them titties.”
I snort, leaning over to shove his shoulder. He jokingly swerves like I caused him to do so with my push and I squeal, not expecting it.
“That was a good date,” I mumble, sitting up and suddenly remembering that a date like that is never going to happen again.
Pierre doesn’t respond but reaches his hand over the center counsel, gripping my hand in his gently and raising it to his lips, leaving a kiss. It’s enough for me.
Float the moon back up in the sky,
Put a cork back into that sweet red wine
Put your midnight hair back up
So you can let it fall one more time
“Why did you have to book a nighttime flight? I’m so tired,” he yawns dramatically as he pulls my suitcase out of the back of his car, holding out his hand for me to grip as we make our way into the airport.
“So I could sleep on the plane. Let me remind you that I didn’t know you when I booked the ticket home, I thought my host father would bring me back to the airport.” I try to bump my shoulder into his shoulder teasingly but hit his arm instead because of our height difference.
“Well, you got something better,” he responds, stopping at the check-in station.
We face each other and he pulls me tightly into his arms, squeezing me like he’ll never let go. I’m not sure I ever want him to let me go. My arms wind around him in return and I grip him as close to me as possible, savoring the last few moments we’ll get together.
“I’m sorry I didn’t get you a goodbye gift,” he mumbles into my hair. “I was going to get you some red 2012 wine but I completely forgot when I was at the store, if I’m being honest with you.”
I laugh into his chest. “I couldn’t even bring it on the plane with me, babe.”
“Oh, that’s right,” he pulls back, gripping my shoulders, “American customs and all.”
He gives me a fond smile, leaning in for one, last, passionate kiss. We suck all of the air out of our lungs before he pulls away, pushing me jokingly towards the counter. “See you later.”
“Yeah. See you later.”
Untouch your skin
Unkiss your lips and kiss 'em again
So good, so right,
This is one night I'm wishing I could rewind
The door chimes and I look up from the counter I’m wiping, freezing once I see who stepped in. It couldn’t be- no. Why would he be here, in America? I thought he played on a team in Canada? He stops once he sees me and I watch him for his reaction.
A smile beams across his face and he practically skips over to me, ignoring the questions that the boys he’s with are asking him.
“Hi,” he breathes out.
“Hi,” I repeat. I watch as his eyes flicker all over my face, from my eyes to my nose to my lips. They stay on my lips, the lips he’s kissed so many times.
I feel electric now that I’m in his presence again. I feel alive, like something left me when I left Sweden and is now coming back now that I’m with Pierre again.
(Float the moon back up in the sky)
I'm wishing I could rewind
(put a cork back into that sweet red wine)
I wanna re-live this night
So good, so right
“I never thought I would see you again,” he confesses, reaching up to sheepishly rub the back of his neck.
“Yeah, me neither. What are you doing here?” I question.
“We’re visiting the hockey team here.”
“This city has a hockey team?” I ask, bewildered.
His laugh rings through the small coffee shop. It’s a beautiful sound that I haven’t heard in a long enough time.
“Do you maybe want to go out tonight? And get some dinner and drinks and just catch up?” He suggests nervously.
“I would love that.”
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Teena Marie's Untimely Death
Teena Marie's Untimely Death
Mary Christine Brockert, also known as Teena Marie, was born on March 5th, 1956, in Santa Monica, California. She was the daughter of a construction worker named Thomas Leslie, and home renovator, Mary Anne. She started singing early on, performing Harry Belafonte's 'Banana Boat Song' by the age of two.
At the age of eight, her parents started to send her to auditions, of where she eventually gained an acting role on 'The Beverly Hillbillies', to where she was credited as 'Tina Marie Brockert'. In the episode, she tap danced for Jed Clampett.
Teena taught herself how to play the guitar, bass, and congas, and would go on to form a semi-professional R&B band with her younger brother Anthony, and their cousin.
She grew up in a predominantly black area of Venice California, spending her teen years in the historically black enclave of Oakwood, also known as 'Venice Harlem'. She formed a strong spiritual influence with the neighborhood matriarch Berthalynn Jackson, a black woman that would later become her godmother.
In an interview, Teena stated that she had a lot of black friends, and learned a lot about black culture. "All the kids used to call me 'Off White' because I acted sort of black and I was comfortable with the black kids.". Her best friend Mickey, was a black girl, and other kids would chase Teena home calling her a 'n-word lover'.
While in high school, Teena joined the Summer Dance Production and was the female lead in the school production of the musical 'The Music Man'. She also fronted the band 'Truvair' from 1974-75, with members of her classmates.
After graduating from high school, she briefly attended Santa Monica College, then went on to sign with Motown Records. While in college she had been juggling her English Literature studies while also auditioning for various record companies.
In 1976, Teena had gained an introduction with Hal Davis, a staff producer from Motown Records. This led to an audition for a film about orphans that was being developed by the record company, but the project itself was shelved. Fortunately, label boss Berry Gordy was impressed with her singing, and decided to sign her as a solo act. Teena then went on to record unreleased material for the next few years before being discovered by fellow labelmate Rick James.
She became a protegee of Rick James, who had became a star on the label with his album 'Come Get It!'. Initially James was to produce for Diana Ross, but changed his mind to work with Marie. Initially her album name was to be 'Teena Tryson', but the name 'Teena Marie' won.
Teena released her first album with Rick James as the producer and chief songwriter, and his Stone City Band backing her musically. The album, 'Wild and Peaceful' was released in 1979. The album had her first top ten hit, 'I'm a Sucker for Your Love', which was a duet with Rick JAmes. Neither the album or its packaging had her picture on it, and many people thought that she was black during the early part of her career. It was not until 1979, when Teena appeared on Soul Train with Rick James that it was revealed she was white. She was the show's first white guest, and would appear 8 more times, more than any other white act on the show.
It was not until her second album, 'Lady T', released in 1980 that her face was shown on a record cover. The album was produced by Richard Rudolph as Rick James was unavailable at the time. That same year, she released her third LP called 'Irons in the Fire', that was handled and produced mostly by herself. This was an achievement for that time, since it was rare for a female artist to be able to have done this back then. Also in 1980, Teena appeared on the song 'Fire and Desire' with Rick James, from the album 'Street Songs'. In an interview, Teena stated that she had a fever at the time, but was able to record her vocals in one take. After the session, she was driven to a hospital.
In 1981, Teena released the album 'It Must Be Magic', which was her first gold record. Her song 'Square Biz' became one of her biggest hits, and was a signature song for the rest of her career.
In 1982, Teena got into a legal battle with Motown Records over her contract and disagreements about the release of new material. The lawsuit resulted in 'The Brockert Initiative' which made it illegal for a record company to keep an artist under contract without releasing new material for that artist. In such instances, artists are able to sign and release with another label instead of being held back by an unsupportive one. In an interview, Teena said, "It wasn't something I set out to do. I just wanted to get away from Motown and have a good life. But it helped a lot of people, like Luther Vandross and the Mary Jane Girls, and a lot of different artists, to get out of their contracts.". Marie then left Motown as the label's most successful white solo act.
In 1982, Teen was contacted by Epic Records in the fall of that year. She had expressed her dismay over her Motown contract, and was then signed to a worldwide deal with the Columbia Records subsidiary that also allowed her to establish her own publishing company, Midnight Magnet.
On September 18th, 1983, she released her fifth album, 'Robbery', a concept album. It was not as successful as the previous release of 'It Must Be Magic', but it did feature talented artists such as Patrice Rushen, Paulinho da Costa, and Steve Ferrone. The album is noted for having the song 'Cassanova Brown', which is about her relationship with Rick James. The story behind the song was that after being signed to Motown and meeting Rick James in the 70's, they began a relationship which started out professional, then progressed to a romantic one. Eventually, it lead to an engagement, which they were for a few weeks. When James' alleged infidelities came to light, Teena realised that she was the mistress. Rick James denied ever having romantic relations with Teena, but Alfie Davidson, who was once a girlfriend of James, stated that Teena and Rick were once an item, while Alfie was the girlfriend. After the breakup, the relationship waned to tumultuous, and the lyrics for the song thinly veil Teena's contempt for the situation.
In 1984, Teena released 'Starchild', which became her biggest selling album, and had her biggest hit 'Lovergirl'. It had a song in tribute to Marvin Gaye, who had been shot in 1984. She was godmother to Marvin's daughter Nona.
In 1986, she released the album 'Emerald City' another concept album. The album was controversial with her established fan base, and wasn't as successful as her other albums. The album was stylistically different from her others, puzzling fans and critics alike. The album forgoes the R&B and Funk elements of her early career, and adopts a more electronic synthesizer sound. In my personal opinion there are a few good songs from this album. I personally enjoy 'Once is Not Enough' and 'Love Me Down Easy'.
In 1988, she returned to her roots and released the album 'Naked To The World' which was critically acclaimed. The album features the famous song 'Ooo La La La', which has been sampled heavily by other artists, such as the Fu Gees, Trey Songz, and Red Man.
Unfortunately, Teena's next album was also unsuccsessful, with the release of 'Ivory' in 1990. The album was her last with Epic Records, and is considered a commercial failure. Her use of hip hop elements on some tracks once again confused fans and critics. Personally, I really enjoyed the song 'The Sugar Shack', though the ending is too long. Songs such as 'If I Were a Bell', "Just Us Two", "Mr Icecream", and "Snap Your Finger" are good. In my personal opinion, I think that people weren't too big on the random poems throughout the album.
In 1994, Teena released her tenth album 'Passion Play' on her own independant label Sarai. Since she didn't have the backing of a major label, the album had limited distribution and has been long out of print. It has become one of the most sought after items in her discography. The album is not on spotify, and copies of it on amazon go for 900+ dollars. There are cheaper copies of it on ebay, and thankfully the songs have been uploaded to youtube by the generous community.
In the 90's, Teena devoted most of her time to raising her daughter Alia Rose.
During the late 90's, she began working on a new album titled 'Black Rain'. She didn't want to release it on her label Sarai, since 'Passion Play' only had moderate sales, but she wasn't able to secure a major label deal for the album. There was a promotional version pressed, that was bootlegged among fans. The songs from this bootlegged version include:
-The Mackin Game
- I'll Take The Pressure
-Baby, I'm Your Fiend
-My Body's Hungry
-I'm On Fire
-Watcha Got 4 Me
-The Perfect Feeling and
In 2004, Teena released her eleventh album 'La Dona', after what was essentially a ten year hiatus. The album was released on Cash Money Records, and became gold certified. The album includes contributions from various artists, such as Common, Birdman, MC Lyte, and of course, Rick James. Rick appeared on the song 'I Got You', which was his last recording before his death. The album peaked at #6 on the Billboard 200, which was her highest placing entry on the chart. She performed the song, "My Body's Hungry" on the show 'The Parkers' in 2000. Songs that were bootlegged from the 'Black Rain' album would appear on this one too.
In 2006, she released the album 'Sapphire', which peaked at #3 on the US R&B Albums chart and #24 on the Billboard.
In 2009, Teena released 'Congo Square', which would be her last before her death. The album peaked at #4 on the R&B charts, and featured collaborations with multiple artists, including her daughter Rose LeBeau (Alia Rose's stage name).
In 2004, when Teena was sleeping in a hotel room, a large picture frame fell and struck her on the head. The blow caused a serious concussion that would cause momentary seizures for the rest of her life. In an interview with the associated press, she also talked about how a sub zero refrigerator fell on her, and she fell into an addiction with vicodin after the passing with Rick James.
On the afternoon of December 26th 2010, Teena was found dead at her Pasadena home by her daughter Alia. On December 30th of that year, an autopsy was performed and found no signs of apparent trauma or discernible cause of death, concluding that she died from natural causes. She had suffered a generalized tonic-clonic seizure a month before.
A memorial service was held at Forest Lawn Cemetery on January 10th 2011. People from the community attended her services, such as Stevie Wonder, Smokey Robinson, Queen Latifah, Sinbad, and Berry Gordy Jr.
Teena was cremated, with her ashes given to her family. She was 54.
Before her death, Teena had been working on more songs for a new album. Through the joint effort of her daughter Alia Rose, the album Beautiful was released on January 15th, 2013. It features artists such as Smokey Robinson, Curtis Mayfield, and even Rose LeBeau.
Her daughter Alia has dabbled in music herself, with two songs on her soundcloud, and a music video released on youtube in 2015.
Teena is quoted as having said, "Overall, my race hasn't been a problem. I'm a black artist with white skin. At the end of the day you have to sing what's in your soul.".
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LET’S START A CHAIN OF SWEETNESS.
5 THINGS YOU LOVE ABOUT YOUR CHARACTER.
ONE: she’s been one of my favorite characters since i was 9, honestly. i fell so in love with her design and personality, all of the spunk and fire she has. my brother played through the game and named her after me (not knowing what happened at the end of disc one) and i just carried that adoration for her this long. she’s amazing, absolutely incredibly well written and just ... god, i’m so soft for her.
TWO: she’s so much more than what you see. everyone assumes she’s a damsel in distress because she’s: in pink, she’s the typical caster, she’s not the most physically imposing person, she’s involved in a love triangle ... whatever. look, aerith gainsborough has never once in her life been a damsel in distress and if you ever insinuate that about her, you know nothing about her. she’s tough as fucking nails and she’s witty to boot. she’ll serve you up a steaming pile of sarcasm while you deign yourself to rescue her and by the time you do help her out you’ll realize she played your ass into it. respect her.
THREE: i’ve said it a few times but why not say it again ---hi, she’s a god. most characters just stay in the ground when they die, they fade into memories and eventually we all forget about them because that’s what happens. aerith? nope, sorry, she has a planet to safe. and she’s going to actively do it. don’t mind her, she’s just communicating with the people she cares about WITH THE WEATHER, she’s just guiding the spirits of the dead into their afterlife with a warm smile and gentle hand. she’s just summoning the fucking lifestream of the planet to thwart the bad guy. no big deal. none at all.
FOUR: gosh she’s just capable of so much love and kindness. i wish i, as a person, were capable of that much. it’s like ... absolute kindness, too. never for a reason other than just to be kind, because you never know who needs it. and she loves with her absolute everything, from the tips of her toes up to the top of her bangs. how do you be that good of a person? the planet doesn’t deserve her.
FIVE: she’s beautiful. like inside and in the most shallow way possible. have you seen her? her eyes are absolutely stunning, and i love that so many people reference how lovely her eyes are in our threads. it really gets me grinning every single time because holy crow ... there’s green eyes and then there’s aerith gainsborough’s green eyes.. but anyway ---look at my daughter. bask in how fucking beautiful she is because she deserves to be appreciated.
5 PEOPLE ON HERE YOU LOVE, AND WHY.
if you’re making me pick only five.
ONE: @renoltage, @strfeborne. faye is, has, and will forever remain my other brain cell. i love absolutely everything about her from her massive gremlin energy to the little headcanons and details she puts into her characters. she’s an incredible writer and more than that ---an incredible friend. she’s entertaining, sweet, so so so giving, and just ... a lovely human. an absolutely lovely human. i love and adore everything about her, hands down. 200/10 an incredible bean and if i left this website tomorrow with no warning i would be all the richer in my life knowing i met and befriended faye.
TWO: @stingslikeabee. everything from mari’s incredible kindness to her talent in writing, to how well-loved her character is, her endless enthusiasm to write (she literally just throws these gorgeous ideas at me for aerith or priest), to the conversations we have in discord where she surprises me with her fucking dry humor and outright sarcasm at times ... look, you don’t often find someone who creates an OC in such a well-established universe and fleshes them out so well that you start to see them as just ... part of the universe. melissa just exists in final fantasy 7, and you can see the love mari put into her with every single connection she has, every single detail of her life and backstory. i am so blessed to be friends with mari, and i absolutely love her, so so much.
THREE: @cssnei, @kalmaccountant. jaejae is my best friend from over the pond. endless conversations just wheezing my lungs out, or sweating from laughing so fucking hard. absolute nonsense to fleshing characters out together, to just messages back and forth one-shot sentences between said characters ... he introduced me to some video games, we just clicked and i really adore everything about this prime asian right here. in the three-four months i’ve been on here i’ve established so many damn inside jokes with the man that it’s as if i’ve known him my entire life. he’s incredibly talented with writing and has shoved all of his love for cissnei (it’s a lot. trust me) into that character and brought her so much more beyond the shuriken turk most might see or know her as. and his oc’s? beautiful. i’ll forever be so soft for zwei (and sam, i see you). just lovely. i adore jaejae, and you should too.
FOUR: @dogof-war. get your ass over here, han. han ... i started following han on my multi muse before i actually made aerith her own account, when han was on biggs still. i instantly fell into the mire of admiration for her writing talent and the thought and attention she puts into her characters. (have you seen heid? let’s look at heid. look at the drabbles. look at the headcanons. we love a fleshed out character, we love a character SO WELL LOVED). we meme’d on y’all so hard when i did make aerith (palmer x hojo is still my otp, thanks) and that’s just how it’s always been. i can send han the most ridiculous shit in discord and say nothing else aside from that and she gets me. and seriously, you should see my chat history in disco with her ... it’s anywhere from me making overtly and super uncomfortable sexual passes at her (she gives them back, don’t worry), to straight up meme’ing, to sometimes just checking in ... to actual deep conversation about characters or our lives and ... han, i love you hon. you’re incredible and lovely and i just am so thankful that you’ve got a devito in me. seriously. han is just the fucking best.
FIVE: @controlthroughfear, @architectofhope. we all knew it was coming. y’all knew i couldn’t have a list somewhere without somehow tagging hmr in this bitch. the friendship that came out of the fucking blue. the ship that stole my heart and ran away with it to costa del sol, or rode into the sunset with a sheriff’s badge and stetson. it’s so rare that i find someone i just click with on every level in the rp world the way i click with hmr: her writing inspires me to instantly want to reply back to her, her characterisations make me want to better my own, she has a way of just making you fall absolutely in love with her characters. it started with rufus on a sinday prompt the went wayward and i was sold. and obviously anyone whose been on my blog for more than 1 half second can see how much i love reeve. reeve. motherfucking reeve and aerith. the rarepair ship i literally never considered until i met this human, that was not at all planned and just happened. where our fucking characters do not listen to us and do the shit they want to do in a reply. and out of character? i look forward to chatting with hmr every day, be it about our ships, about movies, games, nonsense, her CAT ... as i said. it’s so rare i connect with someone the way i have and i know i’ve made an incredible friend in this fandom. so that’s my piece, before i ramble more about how i adore hmr, rufus, and reeve motherfucking tuesti.
5 SONGS EITHER YOU OR YOUR MUSE REGARD AS A ‘GUILTY PLEASURE’ THAT ALWAYS MAKES YOU SMILE.
2 of my guilty pleasure songs, 2 of aerith’s, and one we share. here we go.
ONE: sanremo by mika. my best friend dm’d me on disco one day and went this song is reeve and aerith and said nothing else. so i clicked it and was ... in incredible doubt for literally the first 45 seconds ... and then the chorus hit. so, beyond now permanently associating it as a light and cheesy song for a ship i love, the song is s fucking earworm. i’ve listened to it so many times that i learned every single fucking lyric. i never looked them up. i just learned them. if spotify tracked listens, this one definitely has over 200 in the span of like ... i don’t remember. maybe a month and a half ago now? two months? what is time? most of the listens were from the first week, though. and i can NEVER skip it when it comes up. fuck you, icarus. siodfjsd
TWO: i don’t know why by imagine dragons. my favorite thing in the world is when someone drops music or a quote or aesthetic in my dm’s and tells me they remind me of a character or ship. hmr did this one to me one day going not the lyrics, but the music is definitely a reeve and aerith song. i can see them dancing to it. and ... then we started thinking about them dancing and that ran away with us. i can’t hear this song without 100% associating it with our babies, but i also can’t ever skip over this song. it’s so good. it has a groove to it, a whole as feeling ... an aesthetic. (i’ve always been a fan of imagine dragons but i pick and choose their tunes, so this one went under my radar for a while). literally, the first note plays and i think of those two little shits. i love it, and this song is excellent. (also, i started associating the lyrics with them so ... there’s that).
THREE: stupid by ashnikko. faye introduced ashnikko to me (this song and tantrum) back when she first cropped up with her reno and told me they’re songs she heavily associated with reno. and i can see it! they really are! but they’re also songs that aerith 100% would jam to. you said guilty pleasure music? this, in all of it’s explicit glory, is a song i always see aerith singing along with while she’s weeding in the church with reno sitting on a dilapidated pew behind her, blasting it from his phone. bad influence boy. like ... a lot of people associate pop music with aerith and sure! i’m sure she would listen to it (i have a playlist of music she’d listen to) ... but this song? i just laugh every time i hear it, and i know my gremlin daughter would 100% bop to it. thanks, reno. i appreciate it. honestly. can you imagine aerith, with a straight face (or a little smirk) singing i don’t need the dick, i need magic, i need money? or think about me with your hand down your trousers, i’m sweet then i’m sour, i’m big boss bowser? imagine it. just do it.
FOUR: wait a minute! by willow. a vibey song she’d be really into. it popped into my head the other day and the muse perked instantly. it’s very chill, very a certain mood that aerith really would vibe herself the hell out to. look, her musical tastes vary so hard and are so vast that she’s not opposed to anything at all but you asked for guilty pleasure songs that make her happy and this is one of them. the common theme is ... they’re all songs she can dance to in some fashion so at least i’ve identified that. at any rate, there isn’t much to say about this one other than aerith really likes it and would absolutely listen to it.
FIVE: stepping stone by lemaitre. let’s round off with one both aerith and i jam out to ---i think hmr is responsible for this one, too but i don’t quite recall. if only because we’ve spat so much music back and forth between the two of us. either way, this song has been an earworm for me for the past week or so and ... again is something aerith can dance to. she’s really quite fond of heavy synth music of all forms, so this is right up her alley. honestly, it’s a great song. very catchy.
tagging: do it and tag me please. (: also, the people i tagged above in my i love you i’m a sappy bitch speech.
tagged by: @madamdirectcr, @turkoftheslums ty bbs <3
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Fun fact: harry received more streams on Spotify this week (his 14th week) than niall received on his first week and they both only have one song on today’s top hits the biggest playlist and have pretty much the same playlist exposure. Another fun fact harry is already higher than niall on Apple Music US And pretty much all over the world on his 15th week. Another fun fact is harry charting higher than niall in some countries in Europe and he is #3 in Australia while niall is #2 (part) 1
And the best fun fact is that harry has now spent a total of 14 weeks in the top 10 on official charts in the UK, better than any 1d album. He is #7 this week. And he also managed to spend 7 weeks on billboard 200 top 10.He will also have the longest charting songs in official top 40 very soon and it is adore you and oh my god how can I forget falling is #20 this week. His 4th top 20 hit this era only. Now let’s see if you will post this or ignore it I am curious. (Part 2)
Fun fact, the world doesn’t love Harry Styles like we loved One Direction. We never will. He’s not Bowie. He’s not Elton John. He’s not Prince. He will never be their peer. Do you really think his numbers mean anything?
Fun fact, money buys promo. Influence buys reviews. Shocker! When the label is desperate for a star, has invested tens of millions in the star, and goes all out for a last ditch effort to create a megastar (even if the star himself isn’t looking so hot), sometimes they... create a star! Incredible, I know.
Fun fact, your Excel spreadsheets won’t make Adore You a good song— because it is driven by money and it’s still a shit song. (Falling too)
Another fun fact, Lights Up is the most viewed of Harry’s FL era videos because guess why. That’s right! No one cares about the music! Naked bodies! Rolling Stone— naked cover. Album photos— naked. Beauty Papers— stripping. Behind the Forum video— stripping. Why are we not surprised lol.
Fun fact, Carpool Karaoke One Direction 155 million views, HS1 Harry 55 million views, FL Harry 8.5 million views (gosh his personality really is 😶), BTS 25 million views, Billie Eilish 49 million views, Justin Bieber 16 million views, Adele 213 million views. Oh no! Next time Harry should strip.
Now run along and take pleasure in your numbers, and maybe write another thesis on whether Harry’s sporadic veganism will or will not save the world.
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USA charting and Louis’ debut album Walls
So I’m a numbers person and I thought I would share some information to put context around the USA Billboard 200 Album charts discussions. I want so badly for Louis to have a really solid debut and I also want us to have insight into what his competition is like and how widely the charts vary week to week. The sales of a number 1 album one week might not even be top 5 the next!
First and foremost – Louis’ dets:
Louis’ album drops Jan 31 and his charting week will end on Feb 6 at 11:59PM for the USA Billboard 200 Chart. US YouTube views WILL COUNT towards his charting - a pretty new addition to this chart.
Louis has 7.5M Spotify Monthly Listeners and 2.8M YouTube subscribers at the moment. Note: No US or UK cities are in Louis’ top 5 places where people listen to him on Spotify
PRO: Louis bundled his album w his tour for dates sold through ticketmaster (only a few dates in the US weren’t on TM). Max “sales” possible via ticket bundling estimated ~59,200, but the tour is not sold out and not everyone is going to redeem their albums. Exactly how many albums “sold” via this bundle – anyone’s guess! Plug: Make sure you redeem your free albums if you have a ticket to Louis’ show and rack up those sales for Louis! It’s also a great time to grab a ticket to his show and get his album at the same time if you haven’t yet!
The Competition (also releasing Jan 31)
1. Newly announced – Lil Wayne (18.8M Spotify, 8.55M YouTube). Last album (2018) was highly anticipated as previous album came out in 2013. It had the second highest streaming rates in US at the time and debuted to 480k in sales. All 5 top places where people listen on Spotify are US cities.
2. Kesha (12.6M Spotify, 3.66M YouTube) – Also bundling albums w tour. 4/5 top places were people listen are US cities.
3. Meghan Trainor (15.5M Spotify, 10.8M YouTube) 2/5 top places where people listen are US cities.
Also, as you’ll see from the charts – older albums can still be top 3 on the chart weeks later, so previous strong releases are also competition!
What’s been happening on the Billboard 200 Album Chart Lately?
Week ending Jan 23 - PREDICTED
1. Eminem (surprise drop) – 280,000
2. Halsey – 190,000
3. Mac Miller (posthumous) – 180,000
Week ending Jan 16
1. Selena Gomez – 112,000 (56k stream based sales (i.e. lots more total streams converted to stream based album equivalencies for the charts), 53k sales of full album)
2. Roddy Ricch 110,000 (107k stream based sales!)
3. Moneybagg Yo – 66,000 (59k stream based)
Week ending Jan 9 – includes YouTube views as streams for first time
1. Roddy Ricch - 97,000 (96k stream based via 127 million streams, 91k from audio streams)
2. Post Malone - 65,000
3. Harry Styles - 49,000
Week ending Jan 2
1. Travis Scott Jackboys – 154,000 (79k sales w merch bundles, 74k stream based via 97 million streams)
2. Roddy Ricch – 74,000
3. Post Malone – 64,000
How have other 1D members done on the Billboard 200 charts?
Harry: Harry Styles – 230k; Fine Line - 478k – both number 1
Niall: Flicker – 128k – number 1
Liam: LP1 – 9.5k – number 111
Zayn: Mind of Mine – 157k - number 1; Icarus Falls – ~15-20k – number 61
For me, the bottom line is that Louis is gonna need all of his USA fans’ support to have a strong debut. The competition is tough. I’m rooting for him and all of you! (Stares down at the US border from above, so close to impacting the Billboard chart and YET).
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Chart Update 2021-04-07 16:04 UTC
Kworb Live Apple Music UK: #1312 (-37)
View all the current chart positions for Fine Line
Spotify Top 200 Global: #133 (+18)
Spotify Top 200 US: #166 (=)
Spotify Top 200 GB: #113 (+31)
View all the current chart positions for Falling
Spotify Top 200 Global: #98 (+12)
Spotify Top 200 US: #144 (=)
Spotify Top 200 GB: #74 (-14)
View all the current chart positions for Golden
Kworb Live iTunes Album US: #38 (+2)
Kworb Live iTunes Album UK: #60 (-7)
Kworb Live AppleMusic Album UK: #16 (+1)
View all the current chart positions for Fine Line
Spotify Top 200 Global: #81 (+8)
Spotify Top 200 US: #88 (=)
Spotify Top 200 GB: #127 (-2)
View all the current chart positions for Adore You
Spotify Top 200 Global: #26 (+1)
Spotify Top 200 US: #64 (=)
Spotify Top 200 GB: #50 (-7)
View all the current chart positions for Watermelon Sugar
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“WHEN I AM SILENT A FALL INTO A PLACE WHERE EVERYTHING IS MUSIC” -Rumi Living the notes of music...
Sabrina Annlynn Carpenter(born May 11, 1999) is an American singer and actress,After making her acting debut with an appearance in the crime series Law & Order: Special Victims Unit, she starred in a recurring role as the young version of Chloe Goodwin in the television series The Goodwin Games. Carpenter was later cast as Maya Hart in the Disney Channel series Girl Meets World, from 2014 to 2017.Carpenter has starred in the feature films Horns (2013), The Hate U Give (2018), and starred as Jenny in the Disney Channel Original Movie Adventures in Babysitting (2016). As a voice actress, she had a recurring role as Princess Vivian in the Disney Channel animated series Sofia the First from 2013 to 2018. In 2016, she began voicing Melissa Chase on the Disney XD animated series Milo Murphy's Law.Carpenter's debut EP, Can't Blame a Girl for Trying, was released in 2014, and in the same year, she released her debut single of the same name. She released her debut album, Eyes Wide Open in 2015, and has since released another three studio albums: Evolution (2016), Singular: Act I (2018), and her most recent studio album, Singular: Act II, was released on July 19, 2019.
Demetria Devonne Lovato ( born August 20, 1992) is an American singer, songwriter, actress, and television judge After appearing on the children's television series Barney & Friends (2002–2004), she rose to prominence for her role as Mitchie Torres in the Disney Channel musical television film Camp Rock (2008) and its sequel Camp Rock 2: The Final Jam (2010).Lovato has released six studio albums: Don't Forget (2008), Here We Go Again (2009), Unbroken (2011), Demi (2013), Confident (2015), and Tell Me You Love Me (2017); all of which debuted in the top five of the US Billboard 200. She has earned nine top-20 singles on the US Billboard Hot 100 with "This Is Me", "Here We Go Again", "Send It On", "Skyscraper", "Give Your Heart a Break", "Heart Attack", "Cool for the Summer", "Sorry Not Sorry", and "I Love Me". In total, she has sold over two million albums and 20 million singles in the United States. On television, Lovato has starred as the titular character on Sonny with a Chance (2009–2011); served as a judge and mentor on The X Factor USA in its second and third seasons; and appeared as a recurring character on Glee. Her struggles with personal issues received significant media attention in the 2010s; in response to which she published a book, Staying Strong: 365 Days a Year (2013), and released a YouTube documentary about her life and career, titled Demi Lovato: Simply Complicated (2017).Lovato is a pop, pop rock, and R&B artist. She has received various accolades, including an MTV Video Music Award, 14 Teen Choice Awards, five People's Choice Awards, and two Latin American Music Awards. She also holds one Guinness World Record, and in 2017 Time magazine named her one of the 100 most influential people in the world. Outside the entertainment industry, Lovato is an activist for several social causes.
Laura Marie Marano (born November 29, 1995)is an American actress and singer. She starred in the Disney Channel series Austin & Ally as Ally Dawson. Marano was one of the five original classmates in Are You Smarter than a 5th Grader?. She starred in Without a Trace for three seasons and also Back to You, in both instances playing the daughter of the main characters. Marano starred in the indie film A Sort of Homecoming. Marano also starred in the 2015 Disney Channel Original Movie Bad Hair Day. In 2019 Marano starred in the Netflix original movie The Perfect Date.In 2015, she signed with Big Machine Records and released her debut single "Boombox" on March 11, 2016 and "La La" later that year. On October 5, 2018, Laura Marano released the single "Me" as an independent artist. On January 13, 2016, Marano debuted her own radio talk show on Radio Disney entitled For the Record with Laura Marano. The weekly one-hour show chronicles Marano's journey as she launches her music career, featuring interviews with a guest star in each episode. The show also provides listeners tips on how one can pursue a career in music. The show has featured various guest stars including Nick Jonas, Ariana Grande, Meghan Trainor, OneRepublic, and Troye Sivan. The first episode of the show, which aired January 12, 2016, guest starred her co-stars of Austin & Ally.
Selena Marie Gomez (born July 22, 1992) is an American singer, songwriter, actress, and television producer. Born and raised in Texas, Gomez began her career by appearing on the children's television series Barney & Friends (2002–2004). In her teenage years, she received wider recognition for her role as Alex Russo on the Emmy Award-winning Disney Channel television series Wizards of Waverly Place (2007–2012).Alongside her television career, Gomez has starred in the films Another Cinderella Story (2008), Princess Protection Program (2009), Wizards of Waverly Place: The Movie (2009), Ramona and Beezus (2010), Monte Carlo (2011), Spring Breakers (2012), Getaway (2013), The Fundamentals of Caring (2016), The Dead Don't Die (2019), and A Rainy Day in New York (2019). She also voices the character of Mavis in the Hotel Transylvania film franchise (2012–present), and has executed produced the Netflix television series 13 Reasons Why (2017–2020) and Living Undocumented (2019).Gomez released three albums with her former band, Selena Gomez & the Scene: Kiss & Tell (2009), A Year Without Rain (2010), and When the Sun Goes Down (2011), all of which attained gold certifications and reached the top ten in the US. Additionally, Gomez has released three albums as a solo artist: Stars Dance (2013), Revival (2015), and Rare (2020), all of which debuted at number one in the US. She has released eight songs which reached the top ten on the Billboard Hot 100: "Come & Get It", "The Heart Wants What It Wants", "Good for You", "Same Old Love", "Hands to Myself", "We Don't Talk Anymore" with Charlie Puth, "It Ain't Me" with Kygo, and "Lose You to Love Me", the latter being her first US number-one single.In 2017, Billboard reported that Gomez has sold over 7 million albums and 22 million singles worldwide. Gomez has received various accolades and was recognized as the Billboard Woman of the Year in 2017. She has a large following on social media, and was at one point the most-followed individual on Instagram. Gomez's other ventures include a makeup line, a clothing line, a handbag line, a fragrance line, and a production company named July Moonhead Productions. She has worked with various charitable organizations and, at age 17, she became a UNICEF ambassador.
Meghan Elizabeth Trainor (born December 22, 1993) is an American singer-songwriter "All About That Bass", and for being the recipient of the Grammy Award for Best New Artist at the 58th Annual Grammy Awards. Trainor became interested in music from a young age; she wrote, recorded, and produced three independently released albums between 2009 and 2011. After signing a publishing deal with Big Yellow Dog Music, Trainor wrote and helped produce country and pop music for other artists in 2013. She met producer Kevin Kadish in June that year, with whom she wrote "All About That Bass".Trainor rose to fame after signing a contract with Epic Records in 2014 and releasing "All About That Bass", which topped the Billboard Hot 100 chart for eight consecutive weeks and received a diamond certification from the Recording Industry Association of America (RIAA) but drew criticism for its lyrical content. The song was included on Trainor's major-label debut studio album Title (2015), which also includes the top-10 singles "Lips Are Movin" and "Like I'm Gonna Lose You". The album debuted at number one on the US Billboard 200 and was awarded a triple-platinum certification from the RIAA. The lead single of Trainor's follow-up album Thank You (2016) was "No", which reached number three on the Billboard Hot 100. The album debuted at the same position on the US Billboard 200 and was certified platinum by the RIAA. Her third album with Epic, Treat Myself, was released in January 2020.
Dua Lipa; born 22 August 1995) is an English singer and songwriter. After working as a model, she signed with Warner Music Group in 2015 and released her self-titled debut album in 2017. The album peaked at number three on the UK Albums Chart, and yielded nine singles, including "Be the One" and "IDGAF", and the UK number-one single "New Rules", which also peaked at number six in the US. In 2018, Lipa won the Brit Awards for British Female Solo Artist and British Breakthrough Act.Released in April 2018, the single "One Kiss", with Calvin Harris, peaked at number one in the UK, and became the longest-running number-one single for a female artist in 2018. It won her the 2019 Brit Award for Song of the Year. In 2019, she was also awarded the Grammy Award for Best New Artist, and "Electricity", a collaboration with Silk City, won her the Grammy Award for Best Dance Recording. The success of the singles helped her self-titled album become one of the most-streamed albums on Spotify and achieve platinum certifications. Her second studio album, Future Nostalgia, was released in March 2020 to critical acclaim. It is her first UK number-one album; its lead single "Don't Start Now" peaked at number two on both the UK Singles Chart and the US Billboard Hot 100.Lipa has received various accolades, including two Grammy Awards, three Brit Awards and two MTV Europe Music Awards. She has also been nominated for three Billboard Music Awards, an American Music Award, and four MTV Video Music Awards.
Billie Eilish Pirate Baird O'Connell (born December 18, 2001) is an American singer, songwriter, and musician.She first gained attention in 2015 when she uploaded the song "Ocean Eyes" to SoundCloud, which was subsequently released by the Interscope Records subsidiary Darkroom. The song was written and produced by her brother Finneas, with whom she collaborates on music and live shows. Her debut EP, Don't Smile at Me (2017), reached the top 15 in the US, UK, Canada, and Australia.Eilish's debut studio album, When We All Fall Asleep, Where Do We Go? (2019), debuted atop the Billboard 200 and became the best-performing album of 2019 in the US. It also reached No. 1 in the UK. The album contains six Billboard Hot 100 top 40 singles: "When the Party's Over", "Bury a Friend", "Wish You Were Gay", "Xanny", "Everything I Wanted",[a] and "Bad Guy", the last of which became her first No. 1 single in the US. In 2020, she performed the theme song "No Time to Die" for the James Bond film of the same name, which became her first to peak at No. 1 in the UK.Her accolades include five Grammy Awards, two American Music Awards, two Guinness World Records, three MTV Video Music Awards, and one Brit Award. She is the youngest person and second person ever to win the four main Grammy categories – Best New Artist, Record of the Year, Song of the Year and Album of the Year – in the same year. In 2019, Time placed her on their inaugural "Time 100 Next" list. Additionally, Eilish is the 23rd biggest artist of the digital singles era, according to RIAA, selling 37.5 million singles in the US alone.
Hailee Steinfeld (born December 11, 1996) is an American actress, singer, and songwriter. . Her breakthrough role was as Mattie Ross in the drama western film True Grit (2010), for which she was nominated for the Academy Award for Best Supporting Actress. Thereafter, Steinfeld gained further prominence for roles in Ender's Game (2013), Romeo & Juliet (2013), Begin Again (2013), and 3 Days to Kill (2014). She appeared as Emily Junk in the Pitch Perfect film series (2015–2017), and received a Golden Globe Award nomination for Best Actress – Motion Picture Comedy or Musical for her role as Nadine Franklin in The Edge of Seventeen (2016). In 2018, she voiced Gwen Stacy / Spider-Woman in the animated film Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse and starred in the action film Bumblebee, contributing to the latter's soundtrack. Steinfeld currently stars as Emily Dickinson in the Apple TV+ series Dickinson.Steinfeld made her breakthrough in music after performing "Flashlight" in Pitch Perfect 2 (2015), signing with Republic Records soon after and releasing her debut single, "Love Myself", followed by her debut extended play Haiz (2015). She has since released a series of singles, including "Starving", a collaboration with both Grey and Zedd, which peaked at number 12 on the Billboard Hot 100 chart in the United States, and "Let Me Go", a collaboration with Alesso, Florida Georgia Line and Watt, which peaked at number 14 on the
Karla Camila Cabello Estrabao ( born March 3, 1997) is a Cuban-American singer and songwriter. She rose to prominence as a member of the girl group Fifth Harmony, formed on The X Factor USA in 2012, signing a joint record deal with Syco Music and Epic Records. While in Fifth Harmony, Cabello began to establish herself as a solo artist with the release of the collaborations "I Know What You Did Last Summer" with Shawn Mendes, and "Bad Things" with Machine Gun Kelly, the latter reaching number four on the US Billboard Hot 100. After leaving the group in late 2016, Cabello released several other collaborations, including "Hey Ma" by Pitbull and J Balvin for The Fate of the Furious soundtrack, and her debut solo single "Crying in the Club".Cabello's debut studio album, Camila (2018), reached number one on the Billboard 200 chart. The Latin music-influenced pop album was well received by critics, and received a Platinum certification by the Recording Industry Association of America (RIAA). Its lead single "Havana" topped the charts in several countries including the US and UK, and follow-up single "Never Be the Same" reached the top 10 in multiple countries. Cabello's 2019 duet with Mendes, "Señorita", became her second single to top the Billboard Hot 100. Her second studio album, Romance (2019), peaked at number three on the Billboard 200 chart and number one in Canada.
Ashley Michelle Tisdale (born July 2, 1985) is an American actress, singer, and producer. During her childhood, Tisdale was featured in over 100 advertisements and had minor roles in television and theatre. She achieved mainstream success as Maddie Fitzpatrick in the Disney Channel series The Suite Life of Zack & Cody (2005-2008). This success was heightened when she starred as Sharpay Evans in the High School Musical film series (2006-2008). The success of the films led to Tisdale signing with Warner Bros. Records and subsequently releasing her debut studio album Headstrong (2007). The album was a commercial success, earning a gold certification from the Recording Industry Association of America (RIAA). Tisdale played the voice of Candace Flynn in the Disney Channel animated series Phineas & Ferb (2007-2015).Tisdale's second studio album, Guilty Pleasure (2009), was released to less commercial success than its predecessor. Tisdale would part ways with Warner Bros. Records following the release of the album. During this time, she began appearing in more films and returned to television with shows such as Hellcats (2010). Tisdale's production company Blondie Girl Productions, first formed in 2008, signed a multi-year production deal with Relativity Media in 2010; Tisdale would produce shows such as Miss Advised (2012) as part of the deal. Tisdale starred in the High School Musical spin-off film Sharpay's Fabulous Adventure (2011), releasing a soundtrack to promote the film. This marked her final portrayal of the character to date.
Taylor Alison Swift (born December 13, 1989) is an American singer-songwriter.She is best known for her narrative songwriting that often centers around her personal life, which has received widespread critical praise and media coverage. At age 14, Swift became the youngest artist signed by the Sony/ATV Music publishing house and, at age 15, she signed her first record deal. Her 2006 eponymous debut album was the longest-charting album of the 2000s on the Billboard 200. Its third single, "Our Song", made her the youngest person to single-handedly write and perform a number-one song on the Billboard Hot Country Songs chart. Swift's second studio album, Fearless (2008), propelled her to international fame and produced the successful pop crossover singles "Love Story" and "You Belong with Me". It became the best-selling album of 2009 in the U.S., won four Grammy Awards—including Album of the Year—and was certified Diamond by the RIAA.Swift's self-written third album Speak Now (2010) and genre-bending fourth album Red (2012) each sold over one million copies in their first week in the U.S.; the latter yielded her first Billboard Hot 100 number-one single, "We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together". Her fifth album and first all-pop project, 1989 (2014), produced the back-to-back number-one singles "Shake It Off" and "Blank Space" and won three Grammy Awards—including Album of the Year—making Swift the first woman to succeed herself at the top spot on the Hot 100 and the first woman to win Album of the Year twice as lead artist.
Zara Maria Larsson born 16 December 1997) is a Swedish singer and songwriter. At the age of 10, she achieved national fame in Sweden for winning the 2008 season of the talent show Talang, the Swedish version of British TV's Got Talent. Four years later, in 2012, Larsson signed with the record label TEN Music Group and subsequently released her debut compilation recording, the extended play Introducing, in January 2013. The single "Uncover" topped the music charts in Scandinavia: Sweden, Denmark, and Norway. In February 2013, "Uncover" was certified Platinum by Universal Music Sweden.In July 2013, Introducing was certified 3× Platinum in the country.France. Larsson's debut international album So Good was released on 17 March 2017 and entered at number seven on the UK Albums Chart. It produced eight singles: "Lush Life", "Never Forget You", "Ain't My Fault", "I Would Like", "So Good", "Don't Let Me Be Yours", "Only You", and "Symphony", a collaboration with Clean Bandit. Almost all the album's singles reached the top 15 in the UK.
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F*** the Rules
Prompt: Sucker by The Jonas Brothers // “You're making the typical me break my typical rules, It's true, I'm a sucker for you.”
Warnings: drinking & slight cussing
Word Count: 2.1k
A/N: hello babies! Big congrats to @estoy-enamorado-de-ti for hitting 200 followers! You deserve it lots bb & thank you for letting me be part of this challenge. High key surprised this wasn’t turned in last minute. As always, feedback is greatly appreciated, yell at me if you don’t like it:)
Being a personal assistant was not as bad as most people made it out to be. In fact, you loved your job. When you became Clara Pablo’s assistant, you barely even considered it a job anymore. She took you under her wing and became a sisterly figure. When she joined Walter Kolm entertainment and started working with CNCO she gave you one silly rule — to not sleep/fall in love with any of the guys.
What kind of rule is that? Of course not. I’m professional and would keep my feelings in check. You thought to yourself at the time
--------A year later--------
On the ride back to the hotel Chris snapped his head up from his phone with a smirk.
“Yo, there’s a club called Social that recently opened up here, we should go check it out tonight!” He suggested, showing the pictures he had found on instagram. After a busy day full of promo, everyone agreed that they deserved to have a fun night out.
Back at the hotel everyone split up into their own rooms to get ready, agreeing to meet at the lobby in an hour.
You and Clara rushed to get ready quick enough to leave some time to hit up the hotel bar before meeting up with the guys.
“Is this fine?” You slowly spun around to show her your outfit. After changing multiple times, you finally decided on wearing a tight pink mini high waisted skirt, and a see-through mesh long sleeve top with a black bralette underneath. A little scandy.
“Ayayay sexy mama!” Clara exclaimed. You blew her a kiss and laughed at the hype she was giving you. After finishing up your makeup, you both made your way down to the bar and ordered two cocktails.
“So do you plan on finding a cute guy tonight?” She wiggled her eyebrows.
You awkwardly moved in your seat and took a sip of your drink. Although you shared everything with Clara, you had kept your crush on Zabdiel to yourself for various reasons.
“Nah I’m not interested in that.” You tried playing it off, thankfully you were interrupted before you could get more flustered than you already were.
“Damn Y/N, you look hot!” Richard whistled as he gave you a hug.
“Yea mami, did you get all dressed up for me?” Christopher joked and stuck his tongue out. You rolled your eyes and smacked your friend’s arm playfully. While conversing with the boys you caught Zabdiel stealing glances at you every once in a while but you didn’t think much of it.
The club exceeded your expectations. You danced with the guys to every song that came on until your feet hurt. When you felt a blister start to form on your heel you decided to take a break so you parted from the boys, who were still killing it on the dance floor, and made your way to sit at the bar. You ordered yourself a margarita and pulled out your phone.
“Is this seat taken?” A voice asked from behind you.
You turned and your heart skipped a beat: it was Zabdiel De Jesus.
“By you, yes,” You smiled at him.
Zabdiel sat on the stool beside you, ordered himself a mojito, and turned in your direction.
“Porque estas en tu celular?” He asked with his eyebrows furrowed.
“Just checking some emails.” You responded nonchalantly.
You saw his face fall in disbelief and you stared at him in confusion.
“You can’t be working when you’re out with friends, that’s like, illegal”
He took a sip of his drink and you laughed at his exaggeration
“I have to book our next flights and look for hotels to stay at when we go to Europe. Can’t afford to miss a good deal.” You shrugged just as your phone dinged with a new email notification. You were about to read it when Zabdiel snatched the phone from your hands and tucked it in his pocket.
“Heyyyy, what are you doing?” You crossed your arms and pouted like a child.
He laughed and responded by ordering four dos aquis, “You’re cute when you’re angry.”
Your eyes widened at his comment.
Did he just—
Your thoughts were interrupted by the bartender bringing the cocktails.
“Less working, more drinking.” Zabdiel grabbed his drink and gestured to cheers. You followed, brushing off his previous comment.
Time seemed to fly by when you were with Zabdiel. You didn’t even know how you ended up on top of the bar, dancing and singing along to Sin Pijama by Becky G, halfway through your second drink. Zabdiel laughed his ass off as he watched you dance, holding his arms out in fear that you would lose your balance and plummet to the ground.
When the song finished playing he grabbed you by the waist and helped you jump down. You stumbled a little when your feet hit the ground but Zabdiel held you close, causing your bodies to press together and your faces be inches apart.
“Do you want to get out of here?” He whispered, his eyes quickly flickering to your lips before coming back up.
“I’m sorry, what?” You raised your eyebrows as you were taken aback yet again.
“I know a good pizzeria nearby. They’re open late.” He chuckled, clearly catching on to your assumptions.
Part of you was relieved while another was a little disappointed.
You nodded with a small smile and he led you out of the club, hand in hand.
You ordered an Uber to the pizzeria as Zabdiel kept rambling on about how it was the best pizza in town; his childlike eagerness made your heart melt.
After a fun and interesting dinner you decided it would be best to walk to the hotel, to ‘walk off the food’, and save money. What you hadn’t accounted for was the dark, stormy clouds that floated above you. Five minutes into your walk, it started to pour.
“Ah shit.” You tried to shield yourself from the rain by using Zabdiel but it was no use. He laughed as he picked you up and spun you around in the rain, as if you guys were in a hollywood movie.
By the time you had finally reached the hotel you were soaking wet. You shivered as you walked into the air conditioning. Zabdiel walked you to your room and that’s when you realized that Clara had the only spare room key.
“I’m fucked, I forgot my key with Clara.” You said with a facepalm.
“No te preocupes, come to my room in the meantime. You can take a warm shower there. Otherwise you’re going to catch a cold.” Zabdiel offered with a smile.
“Are you sure Zabdi, I wouldn’t want to impose…”
“Nah nena, you’re fine. Plus, I’m not rooming with anyone tonight.” He held a hand out for you to take and guided you to his room.
He fixed you a hot shower and laid out a T-shirt for you to change into once you were done. You thanked him before he walked out of the bathroom, leaving you alone to shower. You put on your favorite playlist on Spotify and hopped in; minutes later you were having a full on performance, singing and dancing to every song.
Because of this, you hadn’t heard Zabdi yell that he forgot his phone on top of the bathroom sink; nor did you hear as Zabdiel tried to reach a hand in to grab it.
After multiple failed attempts of getting his phone, Zabdiel decided to just quickly go in, grab it, and walk right back out.
Easy, in and out, don’t look, he told himself.
Of course his plan failed. He had accidentally caught a glimpse of you in the mirror and became mesmerized by the movement of your hips and your not-so-terrible voice.
He didn’t know if it was the alcohol in him or the fact that he was madly in love but he suddenly got the urge to jump in the shower with you.
You opened your eyes when you felt a sudden gust of wind and screamed at the sight of Zabdiel standing in front of you.
“AY Dios mio Zabdiel!!!! You scared the shit out of me, what the hell are you--” Your sentence was cut short by his lips crashing into yours. You stood shocked for a moment before melting into the kiss.
“We shouldn’t…” You pulled away and a million thoughts started running through your head.
What the hell just happened? Zabdiel de Jesus just kissed ME.
Wait I’m naked.
Zabdiel bit his lip and pressed his forehead against yours, “Tienes razón, I’m sorry.”
Your lips hovered over each other for a couple seconds before passionately meeting again, pushing everything that was on your mind aside.
The next morning you woke up with a pounding headache. You pulled over a random shirt and stood up, stumbling a little bit before making your way to the bathroom. You were rubbing your temples when you tripped over something on the floor and stumbled forwards; it was a man’s shoe. You began to scan the rest of the room in confusion, looking at each pair of clothing that decorated it. It didn’t take long for the memories to come flooding back: you had slept with one of your best friends. You anxiously began pacing around the room, debating whether or not to wake him up and talk about what happened. You looked over at him and was mesmerized by his beauty: the light that creeped in through the window made his blonde hair shine and his skin glow, making his abs look more defined than ever. He looked so peaceful and precious you couldn't help but smile.
A knock at the door snapped you out of your trance. You walked over and opened it slightly to reveal a smiling Erick.
“Buenos dias Y/N!” He pushed the door open and wrapped you in an embrace. “Ready for breakfast?”
“What are you doing here?” You asked trying to not sound suspicious. You couldn't let Erick find out about you and Zabdiel or word would get out.
“Well I went to your room and Clara said she hadn’t seen you so I tracked your phone… What are you doing in Zabdiel’s room???” He squinted his eyes and pointed at you.
Panic washed over you as your brain tried to come up with a lie.
“I was extremely gone last night and didn’t have my card so Zabdiel let me spend the night here.”
Not a complete lie.
“Why are you wearing his shirt?” Erick retorted.
“I spilled beer over myself.” You rolled your eyes, hoping it would make you look more convincing.
He started walking towards the bed and you quickly grabbed his arm, turning him around.
“I’ll meet you downstairs in 30 minutes okay?” You shot him a quick smile before pushing a confused Erick out of the room. Your head rested against the closed door and you let out a frustrated sigh.
“My clothes look better on you than they do on me.” A raspy voice commented from behind you.
You spun around to see a shirtless Zabdiel, it took all the willpower in you to not jump his bones right there and then. You diverted your eyes avoiding his gaze.
“Leaving so soon?” He asked as he started walking towards you.
You cleared your throat before speaking, still not meeting his eyes “Uh, yeah actually, I have to meet Erick for breakfast.”
“I think I can convince you to stay…” He took one of your hand in his and put a strand of hair behind your ear with the other.
Your heart race quickened as he lifted your chin up with his index finger, forcing your eyes to meet.
He looked deep into your eyes before leaning in. You couldn’t find the words for what you were feeling: you wanted him so incredibly bad but you knew your actions would have consequences, and this time you were sober enough to think straight.
“Do you not understand what this could do to my job?” You whispered right before your lips could meet.
“What do you mean?” He gave you a confused look.
This bitch. What does he mean what do I mean??
“Quit playing.” You pushed past him, clearly annoyed, and started gathering your scattered items.
“Wait, Y/N hold on.” He gently turned you to face him and rested his hands on your hips “Live a little.”
His smirk made you chuckle slightly and you cocked your head to the side as you looked at him.
“You know you’re making the typical me break my typical rules right?” You pouted.
“Fuck the rules. I can’t stay away from you…” He placed a soft kiss on your lips. “I’m a sucker for you.”
You bit your lip smiling, wondering how he had successfully convinced you to stay, and leaned in to kiss him until you heard the hotel door knob turning.
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Let Me Drive My Van Into Your Charts
Or, how the Steven Universe soundtracks have done on Billboard’s charts.
The first soundtrack album released in June 2017, with significant promotion, and was a smash hit. The first week it was eligible for Billboard’s charts had publication date June 24, and here’s where it landed:
The most important album chart is the Billboard 200, on which Volume 1 landed at #22. To give you an idea of how big that is, here are the next few entries on that ranking:
Steven Universe... he’s a muh’fuckin’ starboy. Now granted, none of those albums were in their first week of release--the Hamilton OBCR was in week 89--but that’s still impressive as hell. The Billboard 200 combines album sales, track sales, and streaming, which meant that everyone who went to Spotify and played “Here Comes a Thought” on loop helped the album achieve that ranking. When it comes to pure sales, though, the album did even better. We see above it made it to #10 on “Top Album Sales” and #8 on its close cousin “Top Current Albums” (the difference is the latter excludes so-called “catalog” albums; the 50th anniversary of Sgt. Pepper and the 30th anniversary of Joshua Tree in this case). And if you’re only counting online sales (since there wasn’t a physical CD available), Volume 1 was #3 that week, behind only Halsey and Luke Combs.
But obviously, such smash success is short-lived. The following week, Volume 1 fell to #188 on the Billboard 200 before falling off completely the week after. The ranking where it lasted longest, unsurprisingly, was among Soundtracks. It was in the top 25 soundtracks by sales for eight weeks and in overall ranking for 14 weeks. Not bad.
Volume 2 of the soundtrack was released in April 2019 to a lot less fanfare and a much shorter track list. It didn’t make the Billboard 200 at all, only barely cracking the Top 25 soundtracks list and only for one week.
The movie soundtrack performed in between these two extremes. Someone hurt by only having three days worth of streaming (the charts operate on a Friday-to-Thursday week because music is generally released on Friday, but the movie soundtrack launched on Tuesday), it entered the Billboard 200 at a respectable #80. By pure sales, it was significantly higher, at #20:
And there’s one other tidbit visible on the image just above that one. “Kid Albums”. I’m not sure what metric is used for that, but Volume 1 didn’t count as a Kid Album when it was released. But Volume 2 and the movie soundtrack do, and the movie performed well enough to drag Volume 2 into the rankings almost half a year after its release. But there isn’t just an album ranking for kids’ music. There’s also a ranking for kids’ songs.
And the movie cleaned up, taking four of the 15 spots on that ranking, with “Other Friends” the obvious #1.
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EMPTY ENIGMA ; THE PLAYLIST ( youtube ) ( spotify )
1. ╬═ uncontainable - set it off
2. ╬═ rockstar - daddy rock (cover)
3. ╬═ bad kids - lady gaga
4. ╬═ sophomore slump or comeback of the year - fall out boy
5. ╬═ float on - modest mouse
6. ╬═ do it now remember it later - sleeping with sirens
7. ╬═ restless - too close to touch
8. ╬═ last ones left - blessthefall
9. ╬═ have faith in me - a day to remember
10. ╬═ player haters’ ball - palisades
11. ╬═ watch out - memphis may fire
12. ╬═ against the waves - blessthefall
13. ╬═ petty trappin - slaves
14. ╬═ broken - lovelytheband
15. ╬═ champion - fall out boy
16. ╬═ down for the ride - slaves
17. ╬═ this is the house that doubt built - a day to remember
18. ╬═ dream on - blessthefall (cover)
19. ╬═ immortal - palisades
1. uncontainable ⊰ we’re taking our crown, we’re taking it now ⊱
coming out the gate, we’re swinging. empty enigma together is an unstoppable force, or at least they feel like they are-- destined for amazing things and soaring to great heights. especially on stage, they don’t back down for anything, but it applies to their true selves, too. for a bonus, daniel and woojin box, so the metaphors 👍
2. rockstar ⊰ dude your girlfriend is a groupie she just tryna get in, saying “i’m with the band” ⊱
squall, alpha, brand, cameo and reign are wild; there has to be at least one song dedicated to it. don’t give them too much credit and think this isn’t relevant beyond the title.
3. bad kids ⊰ i’m not that cool and you hate me, i’m a bad kid that’s the way they made me ⊱
everyone came to empty enigma for different reasons, but all of them have at least a little rebellious bone in their body to be part of a metalcore band. there’s some defying authority, a lot of defying expectations, and a little disappointing people in their lives that don’t think the band is an honorable pursuit, at the very least. empty engima doesn’t care. all of that aside, they came together to support each other under all circumstances. you’re still good to me if you’re a bad kid, baby.
4. sophomore slump or comeback of the year ⊰ i’ll keep singing this lie if you keep believing it ⊱
empty enigma is a mystery, but also a lie, based upon stage personas all of the members hide behind, giving them the power to be whoever they want to be-- different than they really are. there’s more to the song than that, though: a dedication to empty enigma’s fans, and their devotion to each other, getting through hard times, and enjoying every moment. it’s just a matter of time until we’re all found out, and they were, but at least it was on their own terms.
5. float on ⊰ don't worry even if things end up a bit too heavy, we'll all float on ⊱
together, they get through everything, taking everything one day at a time, and it’s all okay as long as there’s empty enigma. [sobs into my hands]
6. do it now remember it later ⊰ remember when they said what we want can never be done? ⊱
empty enigma has had a lot of doubters, whether it’s random people or those close to the members, but in the end, they do what they want to, and the band empowers them to say so. come on say what you think, it won't mean a thing, in the end we're gonna be just fine.
7. restless ⊰ do whatever makes us lose control, just for a night ⊱
they all have their own troubles, but the band is an escape from that, even if it’s just for a show every weekend.
8. last ones left ⊰ if we’re going down, we all go down together, and that’s the way it is ⊱
somehow this song ended up on this playlist when i made it the first week of the mgas, but it has new meaning following the developments of the mgas. kenta and woojin receiving contracts, everyone wanting to hang onto the band, even to the point of wishing they wouldn’t accept their contracts. the chorus reflects their original feelings, but now it’s clear they won’t stay like this forever, but they’ll still supporting each other regardless.
9. have faith in me ⊰ you’ll always find me right there, again ⊱
a song about how they’ll always be there for each other no matter what, even when all else fails basically, haha!
10. player haters’ ball ⊰ wolves don’t lose sleep on the thoughts of sheep ⊱
here we have a lovely hardcore screamo song that marks the beginning of the part of this playlist dedicated to their haters, which was relevant enough before due to people hating on metalcore in general and people in their lives trying to tell them what to do. after the mgas, the relevancy increased by 200%, since daniel and kenta especially endured some hate comments and lowkey care a lot about what people think of them; empty enigma gives them strength and makes them care a whole lot less about anonymous people tearing them down. the only truth is that you’re still unknown, and empty enigma isn’t anymore.
11. watch out ⊰ we came to change the game so get out the way ⊱
this is another self-hype song and a lil bit to haters too, and their intention to be successful and their belief that they already are just doing what they’re doing. this is another one that applies more mgas considered, because this is relevant to when they first set foot on the show. (fun fact: this was a contender for between fear and faith’s title track.)
12. against the waves ⊰ but if it’s all the same, they’ll find the worst in you ⊱
pt 3 of songs to their haters, and a vow to stay strong in the face of them and any adversity, and the chorus applies to them wanting the band to be a source of support for people going through the same. i wonder why that “nothing can last forever” line is there haha how is that relevant haha
13. petty trappin ⊰ you say i’m everything you despise, everything you don’t like ⊱
this is the final and most relevant song dedicated to haters, all a highly applicable message to anyone that talked shit during the mgas, supercharged with some unshakable empty enigma confidence. every person that hates them is a person that can’t stop paying attention to them, after all. also a song in my potential ee follow up album playlist because they truly could’ve written this song.
14. broken ⊰ i like that you’re lonely, lonely like me, i could be lonely with you ⊱
all of the members were a little broken, and maybe they still are, but at least they’re broken (and maybe a little lonely) together where they didn’t quite fit in anywhere else. daniel also met most of them late night at a party, so that’s a bonus. (extra bonus: this is the first song i ever associated with ee; i think it was back in october 2018 or something and that think i could love you but i’m not sure line always made me think of nielwoon, perhaps i’m a psychic.)
15. champion ⊰ i’m a champion of the people who don’t believe in champions ⊱
one of the last songs added to the playlist, this is dedicated to their dreams and touches back on that constant theme of being some kind of outcast and underdog. it also highly applies to the mgas (if i can live through this, i can do anything) but this playlist was still finished by episode two of the show, so that i’m calling you from the future to let you know we made a mistake line was foreshadowing?? ee mgas was a mistake. maybe
16. down for the ride ⊰ taking over, feeling at home with you ⊱
empty enigma is home, as a band or just the friends that make it up. they leaned a lot from each other, and the band was a crazy ride-- one they’re still on together and might be too attached to. (moving forward, learn to let go.)
17. this is the house that doubt built ⊰ we’ll sing like everyone when they’re alone ⊱
a mix of several moods on the playlist: empty enigma as an escape, strength and something that makes them feel fearless, and teamwork on top of that. it’s also a bit of a reference to their secret identities, why they used them, and what they’ve learned from them. (when you find yourself please let me know.)
18. dream on ⊰ sing with me, just for today; maybe tomorrow the good lord will take you away ⊱
the original intent of this song in the playlist was because this was probably a cover on the band’s early setlists, and you know, the whole concept applies to people going after their dreams together and performing to cope with everything, but post disbandment(?) this hits different. don’t make me explain it and just listen to it. thank you.
19. immortal ⊰ i’m not dying, no i’m not dying today ⊱
this is the band’s lead single on their first album. please proceed to between fear and faith.
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Swalla, Jason Derulo ;)
Private room. Lush couches. King size bed. Bubbling hot tub. Bottle service. Ambient lights. Pulsing beat. Just the two of them, and 4 hours awaiting them.
Rhett isn't a fan of flexing his financial status, but he can't help but treat the pretty piece of arm candy he's currently got nestled under his arm from time to time.
Okay, so it's their money. But it makes Link feel a certain type of way when Rhett's the one handing their joint credit card to the lady at the front desk.
Rhett kept an arm casually draped over Link's shoulder as the desk attendant sorted out their room key and amenities. Link was almost vibrating with excited energy as he pawed at Rhett's front, toying with his dark red tie, his eyes locked into Rhett's calm face.
Within a minute, Rhett was handed a matte black key card. With a wink, Rhett thanked the woman and corralled a giddy Link to the elevator.
As to be expected, the moment the metal doors closed Link spin out of Rhett's grip and plastered himself to his front, his lips finding their way right to Rhett's neck, hands greedily grasping at the dark grey button down keeping him from feeling the skin contact he so badly needed. Rhett moaned softly, putting his hands gently on Link's shoulders.
"Slow down, we've got plenty of time, Bo."
The lock quietly beeped as the key card was swiped through, followed by a metallic thud as the deadbolt slid open.
Rhett placed a hand at the small of Link's back, leading him into the room. It's not the first time they've stepped on the plush carpet or basked in the amber glow of hanging lamps that hung about the suite. Every once in a while the two would get a night free of business matters and they would have a little extra change to splurge with. Neither were too into lavish lifestyles, but it was fun to get into a different atmosphere every once in a while.
Rhett wasted no time in settling into one of the velvety red couches that lined the glossy black wall. He loosened his tie so it hung comfortably off of his neck, unbuttoning the top button of his shirt. He draped an arm over the back of the couch, legs splayed open, his eyes casually trained on Link who busied himself by the iPod dock.
Link grinned as a slow, sultry pop beat filled the room. Who knew Spotify would have a genre of playlists specifically for the bedroom?
Link turned around, a small gasp escaping him. No matter how many times he lays eyes on Rhett, it's breathtaking. Especially now, with him presenting himself like this, an air of sheer confidence surrounding him.
A loud snap of the fingers suddenly startles Link.
"It's rude to stare, baby. You gonna get us a drink or what?" Rhett said, a hint of mock impatience in his voice. Link knew it was all in good fun.
"Yes Sir." Link said sweetly, his gaze dropping away from Rhett as he walked over to the bar on the opposite wall. He gently cradled a chilled bottle of expensive champagne, twisting the wire cage off of the cork. Rhett gazed hungrily at the slight curve of Link's hips in his skinny jeans as they swayed slightly with each movement Link made.
Without warning, the cork flies out with an explosive pop, a bit of the champagne bubbling out of the neck onto the bar. With a few whispered expletives, Link hurriedly stuffed the mouth of the bottle into his own, quickly drinking down the froth that oozed out. When the threat of wetting the carpet with the precious liquid was no more, he released the bottle from his lips, setting it back down onto the sleek bartop. He heaved a relieved sigh, but it was cut short when he felt fingers weave their way into the hair on the back of his head and grip down, firmly but painlessly.
Before he could react, Rhett's lips met his own, a tongue diving past his lips, mingling with his champagne-soaked own. He whined when Rhett pulled back, licking his lips, a low rumble emanating from his chest. The same sound when he tastes his favorite foods.
"Couldn't wait. Had to get a taste." Rhett said with a grin, his eyes boring into Link's.
With a smirk, Link grabbed the bottle, put it to his lips and tilted it back, taking a few generous gulps. Catching his breath, he set the bottle back down onto the bar. His eyes narrowed as he licked his lips in wordless invitation.
Rhett growled and dove into Link, kissing him deeply, his tongue exploring deeper into the warm, champagne-flavored mouth, his arms wrapping effortlessly around the smaller man as he walked them back towards the plush bed. They both fall into it with a grunt, their lips parting only a moment to spare their faces from the impact before resuming, tongues gliding, teeth nibbling.
With a smack, Link breaks the kiss, his breath ragged.
"Champagnes gonna go flat. That was like $200, Rhett" He says now into Rhett's neck, his teeth grazing the soft skin.
"I got more than my money's worth from it right here," Rhett said, his fingers tilting Link's chin back up, capturing his lips with his own once again. His tongue danced lightly, teasingly across Link's lips, the hint of champagne still clinging to the reddened skin. "Got something better for you to taste anyway."
Link didn't need to inquire to what that meant.
Without wasting a moment, Link began clawing at Rhett's clothes, button by button, clasp, zipper, until he was completely nude. Rhett positioned himself at the head of the bed, his upper half propped up by pillows, and palmed at the sizeable cock that lay against his stomach. Link salivated in anticipation watching Rhett.
"Hold on Bo, I don't wanna be the only one naked, here." Rhett said, his voice dark and gritty, his hips rolling ever so gently at his touch.
"But keep the tie."
Link grinned, loosening the tie and unbuttoning his shirt from underneath it. He stood up, sliding his jeans off of his slim legs, kicking them off to the side.
He knelt back onto the bed and crawled over to Rhett, straddling his thighs. Rhett took hold of the bottom of Link's dark blue tie, wrapping it once around his fist, pulling Link the rest of the way back into him. The movement pulled their bodies together, their cocks pressed side by side between their stomachs. Link let out a yelp at the contact, his hand shooting down between them, desperate for friction. He wrapped his long fingers around both of their aching arousals, his hips rolling in time with the strokes of his hand. Moans and panting breaths melted into the music in the background.
Careful not to get lost in the moment, Rhett tugged again at Link's tie.
"M'not planning on cumming like this baby. I want you to taste me." He said breathily.
Link planted one more kiss on Rhett's lips before he slid off of his lap, positioning himself on his knees between Rhett's long legs. He wrapped his fingers around the base of Rhett's cock, slowly dragging them up towards the top, drawing a low growl out of the man laying before him. He gave a few slow strokes before dropping his upper body down, an arm coming to rest across Rhett's hip.
Link extended his tongue, flattening it against the sensitive underside, and licked a wet stripe all the way to the tip, capturing a bead of precum which he eagerly lapped up. Rhett's hand intertwined itself into the dark hair, coaxing a whine out of Link.
Not wanting to waste any time, Link plunged Rhett's cock into his mouth, quickly setting a rhythm as he swirled his tongue and hollowed his cheeks, drawing shivers and gasps and expletives out of Rhett. The moans and growls coming from Rhett spurred him on, picking up speed, his hand working where his mouth wasn't.
Link whined and squirmed, his own arousal begging for attention as he stroked and sucked, basking in the praise and obscene noises he pulled out of Rhett.
Rhett's hips rolled and bucked as Link's worked him, quickly bringing him to the edge. Quicker than he would have liked, but Link had a knack for knowing how to get Rhett off in record time. Besides, this was only round 1, he remembered.
"Fuck, baby, you're so good, I'm getting close." Rhett whined, his grip tightening on Link's hair. Link whimpered, desperate for Rhett's release, which he loved to experience just much as his own. Rhett's movements became more erratic as his breath sped up into jagged gasps.
"Link, baby, fuck!" Rhett shouted, gasping and grunting as his hips thrusted up into Link's mouth, painting his tongue with his come. Link's eyes pressed tightly shut, moaning loudly around Rhett's cock, saliva and come leaking out from the corners of his mouth, down Rhett's pulsing cock and pooling in the thick hair that laid around the base.
Link released Rhett's cock and sat up, catching his breath as come dripped down from his lips to his chin, his face in a perfect dick-drunk daze. Rhett eyed him hungrily, grabbing hold of his tie, bringing their faces within an inch of each other. He grinned, licking his lips.
Rhett pulled Link into another deep, passionate kiss, just like the first one, hungry for the taste of his lover with just a hint of whatever tantalizing flavor he's experiencing.
They still had over 3 hours left. Rhett's cock already began to spring back to life at the thought of what was to come.
Whoo, another lengthy one! Hope you enjoy, and thanks for the ask!
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Today I finished The Year of Less by Cait Flanders and it really resonated with me. One of my goals for 2019 already was to downsize, partially because I was feeling overwhelmed by how much stuff I own; partially because I was running out of space; and partially because I was anticipating moving this summer, and I wanted to haul as little as possible. I purged my closet, my bookshelf, and my DVD collection. Granted, I still have what many would consider A BUNCH of items in these categories, but as Marie Kondo would say, they really do “spark joy.”
I want to clean out other areas of my home, but due to having roommates, this is a challenge since with some things I’m not sure whose is whose. But this summer, they will be moving out, and my boyfriend and I will be living alone together for the first time in 4 years—for the first time since we graduated from college (me with my MA and him with his BS). I’m looking forward to cleaning out the kitchen and our closets.
Another reason I want to binge clean is because we will have two spare rooms in our house, but I don’t want them to become what they have been in the past: junk rooms. Typically these rooms serve a primary purpose (usually our music room), but they also serve as a dumping ground for anything we don’t know what to do with or things we don’t want in public view (ie junk). I want these rooms to be no more than they are: a guest room and a music room/office. We are only two people; we don’t need three rooms full of just stuff.
But until we can get started purging and cleaning our house, there are some steps I can already start taking to work towards my year of less. I’ve been saving money for a few months now because I thought I might owe money on my taxes. Luckily it turns out I didn’t thanks to some very helpful deductions, so I have a very small “influx” of money.
Which leads me to my next reason for doing this.
I’m in debt. By a lot. Getting a bachelor’s and master’s degree did not come cheap. My parents only paid for 2 years of my undergrad degree, and I was on my own for the next 7 years of school (yeah you read that right—my undergrad took 5 years and grad school took 4). As a result, my student loan debt is astronomical. Not only that, but because of my light class load my last year in school, I didn’t qualify for financial aid, and had to use 3 different credit cards to pay the rest of my tuition. So all that gets piled on top of my K2 mountain of debt.
With what I make now at my job, I can make it by. I’ll be able to afford rent, bills, and debt repayments. But that’s about it. And that’s not the kind of life I want to live. I’m not even talking about traveling the world or taking vacations. I just want to hang out with friends or go visit my family. I want to buy gas for something besides work. I want to treat my friends when they need a pick me up or need to celebrate. I want to be able to get my haircut when I need it.
So I decided I could up my weekly savings and see where that would lead me 4 months from now. By doing that alone, I could pay off half of my credit card debt by this fall, and finish the rest of it by next summer. That frees up nearly $500 for me to put towards extra student loan payments. Just by saving more money each week.
After calculating that, I looked at where I’m spending money during work hours. I am a contract music therapist, so I drive all over my area to my clients homes for sessions. Sometimes I knock the sessions out one after the other, but sometimes I have some time to kill inbetween. Since I started my job in June of 2018, I chose to go to a coffee shop (Starbucks or a local brew) to get a drink and work on paperwork or read a book. I looked at my expenses for just the last 2 months, and I had spent $150 on coffee alone. Thats $75 a month I’m spending to have a coffee for an hour or so once or twice a week. Then I added up any time I ate a meal between sessions. Almost $75 more. $150 a month on food and drinks. That’s almost $40 a week. I easily can cut those things out of my routine. Instead of going to a coffee shop, I can find somewhere else to kill time between sessions. If the weather is nice, I can go to a park and walk for a bit. If there’s a bench or a table, I can do my work there. If the weather is bad, I’ll give myself some grace and allow for a coffee. If I lived closer to work, I would definitely just spend my time there.
My next step was to look at any expenses that were truly unnecessary. I use Spotify regularly for work, so that’s not something I could give up. But I do have some months subscriptions to some other services that I really don’t need. By cutting those out, I save almost $50 more.
That means I potentially have nearly $200 extra to put to better use, and I didn’t even look at how much I spend on eating out for dinner or on just shopping. One step at a time y’all!
So if I save $200 a month for 4 months, I’ll have an additional $800 to put toward something. This combined with my regular savings will put me in a good position to reduce my credit card debt more quickly, which in turn will help me pay off my student loans faster.
Once I pay off the credit cards, I’ll have almost $500 a month to put elsewhere. That plus my $200 savings from spending during work hours is nearly $700 extra I can put toward my student loans each month. That’s half of what I will already be paying. And if I keep putting money into my regular savings...that’s even more. I could potentially reduce my payment time by YEARS and finally really start saving money for better things.
Financial freedom is something I never thought I could attain. But Cait’s book made me feel that it WAS possible, I just had to make it a priority. It was odd to realize that with as much anxiety as I had about repaying all my debt, I haven’t really been taking a lot of steps toward lessening my anxiety. But my making it a priority, not in terms of worrying but in terms of taking action, I have already lessened by burden significantly.
Usually when I do challenges like this, I lose motivation. But this is something I feel good about deep in my bones. And not only that, it’s easily doable. I’m not upping my savings significantly. I’m not even banning shopping like Cait did or cutting back on my eating habits (although I imagine this will start to happen organically once I’m really saving and realize how frivolous it is). I’m only cutting out unnecessary spending during work hours. That’s it.
Anyway I don’t think anyone will have read this all the way through, but if anyone has, thank you! I’m gonna try to post sometimes and talk about how it’s going :)
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Chart Update 2021-04-05 13:05 UTC
Treat People with Kindness:
Kworb Live Apple Music UK: #1143 (+29)
View all the current chart positions for Treat People with Kindness
Spotify Top 200 Global: #151 (+18)
Spotify Top 200 US: no longer on chart
Spotify Top 200 GB: #144 (+14)
View all the current chart positions for Falling
Kworb Live Apple Music UK: #1157 (+48)
View all the current chart positions for Cherry
Spotify Top 200 Global: #110 (+3)
Spotify Top 200 US: #158 (+12)
Spotify Top 200 GB: #60 (+4)
View all the current chart positions for Golden
Kworb Live iTunes Album US: #47 (-7)
Kworb Live AppleMusic Album UK: #13 (+1)
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Dude, do all of the numbers for that getting to know you better ask! Or half bc 200 is a lot :0
ahhhhhh,, you so nice
1: My name? - Margaret
2: Do I have any nicknames? - maggie, mag, mags, maggles, at one point my friends called me parky
3: Zodiac sign? - libra
4: Video game I play to chill, not to win? - i’ve never been too good at video games (but i like watching ppl playing them) and i’ve only ever had a wii so my sims kingdom was a favorite of mine
5: Book/series I reread? - divergent and pjo
6: Aliens or ghosts? - yes
7: Writer I trust enough to read whatever they write? - @kata-chthonia
8: Favourite radio station? - 103.3 fm, although i mostly listen to spotify now
9: Favourite flavour of anything? - grape and blue raspberry
10: The word that I use all the time to describe something great? - great or cool
11: Favourite song? - a to b by matt hires
12: The question you ask new friends to get to know them better? - it usually has to do with what drew me to them in the first place followed up by a version ‘why do you think that?’ i like knowing how ppl think bc it gives me a better way to start understand their view
13: Favourite word? - aurora
14: The last person who hurt me, did I forgive them? - i can’t really remember, so i dont know what that says :/
15: Last song I listened to? - serial killer by moncrieff
16: TV show I always recommend? - dexter or if they don’t like blood and violence, any of john mulaneys specials
17: Pirates or ninjas? - i liked pirates when i was younger, but ninjas are cool
18: Movie I watch when I’m feeling down? - any studio ghibli or song of the sea
19: Song that I always start my shuffle with/wake-up song/always-on-a-loop song? - lately its been SLUT by bea miller
20: Favourite video games? - i really love boderlands, the art style is great
21: What am I most afraid of? - snakes and failing at something i’ve been saying that i wanted to do my entire life
22: A good quality of mine? - im nice??
23: A bad quality of mine? - im a bit aggressive and im really blunt about things
24: Cats or dogs? - dogs!! I like cats too but i dont know how to interact with them
25: Actor/actress you trust enough to watch whatever they’re in? - he’s a voice actor, but crispin freeman is really cool!
26: Favourite season? - fall and spring
27: Am I in a relationship? - yeah, but it’s long distance during the school year ;-;
28: Something I miss? - my boi,, he’ll be back soon tho
29: My best friend? @keencheckerboard and @memeathon
30: Eye colour? - brown
31: Hair colour? - brown with red and blonde highlights
32: Someone I love? - my mom
33: Someone I trust? - @keencheckerboard
34: Someone I always think about? - @memeathon
35: Am I excited about anything? - finals to be over!
36: My current obsession? - bnha tbh
37: Favourite TV shows as a child? - i loved avatar and ed, edd, and eddy
38: Do I have someone of the opposite sex that I can tell everything to? - to an extent, but i dont tell them /every/thing
39: Am I superstitious? - kind of
40: What do I think about most? - right now, school
41: Do I have any strange phobias? - not really, i mean i overthink a lot of things, but there’s no phobias
42: Do I prefer to be in front of the camera or behind it? behind
43: Favourite hobbies? - drawing/reading/writing/sleeping
44: Last book I read? - i think it was called stung, i actually finished it bc i wanted to complain about it properly
45: Last film I watched? - dumbo, my friend wanted to go see it, it wasnt good
46: Do I play any instruments? - i played clarinet for 3 years
47: Favourite animal? - dogs
48: Top 5 blog on Tumblr that I follow? - @wemakuu @wemakuutwo @keencheckerboard @memeathon @kata-chthonia
49: Superpower I wish I could have? - teleportation
50: How do I destress? - getting cozy and warm under my blankets with the lights off
51: Do I like confrontation? - i can be aggressive so i will be confrontational if i have to but i don’t go out of my way for it
52: When do I feel most at peace? - in my bed with the lights off
53: What makes me smile? - my friends, my boi, and goofy animal videos
54: Do I sleep with the lights on or off? - gotta be pitch black
55: Play any sports? - i played roller derby for 3 years
56: What is my song of the week? - really feeling be by hozier
57: Favourite drink? - …..water…. and a slushee
58: When did I last send a handwritten letter to somebody? - i think last summer???
59: Afraid of heights? - nope
60: Pet peeve? - slow walkers
61: What was the last concert I went to see? - does my high school’s band count???
62: Am I vegetarian/vegan/pescatarian? - nah
63: What occupation did I want to do when I was younger? - ob nurse, i still do
64: Have I ever had a friend turn enemy? - no, i’ve had ppl i tolerated turn into ppl i hate tho
65: What fictional universe would I like to be a part of? - bhna, but i feel the hero drama would get annoying after awhile
66: Something I worry about? - failing my classes
67: Scared of the dark? - nope
68: Who are my best friends? - this is the same as 29
69: What do I admire most about others? - their drive and where their motivation comes from
70: Can I sing? - no ;-;
71: Something I wish I could do? - sing
72: If I won the lottery, what would I do? - pay off my loans and (hopefully) for the rest of my college and then put whatever i had left into a savings account
73: Have I ever skipped school? - yes
74: Favourite place on the planet? - i think the smoky mountains are really pretty and i loved vacationing around them, but colorado was really neat too, so probs one of those places
75: Where do I want to live? - somewhere on the northeast coast!
76: Do I have any pets? - yeah!! He’s a doggo named dageus,,,, here he is,, the big boi!! (hes 121 pounds of love!!!!!)
77: What is my current desktop picture? - something @memeathon drew me
78: Early bird or night owl? - night owl
79: Sunsets or sunrise? - im usually awake during sunset, but sunrise is really pretty
80: Can I drive? - yeah!
81: Story behind my last kiss? - i was saying bye to my boi at the airport
82: Earphones or headphones? - earphones
83: Have I ever had braces? - yeah,, they weren’t fun
84: Story behind one of my scars? - i have a couple little ones from acne on my back but other than that i don’t have any
85: Favourite genre of music? - i think indie rock?? Is that a genre?? Punk maybe????
86: Who is my hero? - florence nightingale,, she was hella cool and i went to her museum in london
87: Favourite comic book character? - i didn’t read a lot of comic books but i always liked spiderman and witchblade
88: What makes me really angry? - when ppl make fun of my friends >:l
89: Kindle or real book? - i like real books but ebooks are nice for traveling!!
90: Favourite sporty activity? - roller derby or skating
91: What is one thing that isn’t tight in schools that should be? - im not really sure what this question means????? But i didn’t like that in my middle school that the behavior coach(es) would already pick sides or would already hate kids that did nothing wrong and then in my high school no one cleaned up after themselves bc ‘the janitors can do it’ :/ it was really annoying
92: What was my favourite subject at school? - english/creative writing and art!!
93: Siblings? - i got an older brother who’s a big nerd
94: What was the last thing I bought? - i went to target last night and i got $68 worth of stuff including planty stuff, food, and gift stuff for my boyfriend’s moms
95: How tall am I? - 5’6” but i will not hesitate bitch
96: Can I cook? - yeah!
97: Can I bake? - yeah!
98: 3 things I love? - my friends/family, animals, and plants
99: 3 things I hate? - slow walkers, rasict/homo/trans/biphobic (anyone who just hates ppl for no reason tbh), and rude ppl >:l
100: Do I have more girl friends or boy friends? - more girl friends,,, i’ve kinda lost contact with most of my guy friends over the years,,,,
101: Who do I get on with better, girls or boys? - i feel more comfortable around other girls now but when i was younger i was okay with everyone
102: Where was I born? - in the cornfields of the midwest (i fucking hate this state)
103: Sexual orientation? - straight
104: Where do I currently live? - in the cornfields of the midwest, i am the creature you’re warned about, don’t walk alone at night
105: Last person I texted? - @memeathon : D
106: Last time I cried? - yesterday,,, finals hit me hard but i feel better now :D
107: Guilty pleasure? - uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh,,,,,, looking at gross stuff,,, like surgeries and sometimes those pimple popping videos,,,,,,,,
108: Favourite Youtuber? - i’ve been watching a lot of gordon ramsay videos lately but i think brandon rogers or sovietwomble are up there
109: A photo of myself. - heres one i took on my break at work
110: Do I like selfies? - no,,, i don’t really like looking back on photos of myself bc i think i just look weird,, like even in my super nice senior photos,,, or baby pictures,,
111: Favourite game app? - does neko astsume count???
112: My relationship with my parents? - it’s p good :D
113: Favourite accents? - i’m not really sure,,, i think just a flat accent, like midwestern bc its the one im most familiar with so its like homey???????
114: A place I have not been but wish to visit? - japan,, nowhere in specific i just want to see the country
115: Favourite number? - 23!!!!
116: Can I juggle? - no
117: Am I religious? - im a polytheist (a bad one, but oh well)
118: Do I like space? - i love space!!!! Its so neat!!!!!!
119: Do I like the deep ocean? - no!!! Its awful!!!!
120: Am I much of a daredevil? - i think my friends think i am, but i dont really think so, i mean i’ll try anything if it sounds fun, but not everything
121: Am I allergic to anything? - not that i know of
122: Can I curl my tongue? - yes
123: Can I wiggle my ears? - no
124: Do I like clowns? - not really
125: The Beatles or Elvis? - a little bit of each
126: My current project? - my creative writing portfolio ;-; its not that hard but im trying to figure out how to get this character right
127: Am I a bad loser? - depends on what i lost in, like if it was a game i didn’t really care about than no, but if it was something that i cared about a lot than yeah
128: Do I admit when I wrong? - i always try to, but sometimes i don’t
129: Forest or beach? - forest,, i don’t like the beach,, too much sand
130: Favourite piece of advice? - it’s not really advice but just the reminder that your current situation is not your final destination
131: Am I a good liar? - i think so
132: Hogwarts house / Divergent faction / Hunger Games district? - slytherin (its funny bc im scared of snakes)/ dauntless/ and i think district 6 (i live in the crossroads of america so yeah)
133: Do I talk to myself? - all the fucking time
134: Am I very social? - sometimes, i am kinda a social introvert
135: Do I like gossip? - i like to hear it but not be part of it
136: Do I keep a journal/diary? - i have a bullet journal and i try to keep up with my habit and mood tracker daily
137: Have I ever hopelessly failed a test? - no, but i have gotten like high d’s and low c’s before that make me sad
138: Do I believe in second chances? - depends on what they messed up on the first chance, like if someone cheated then no
139: If I found a wallet full of cash on the ground, what would I do? - i would like to say that i would return it with no money taken, but im just not sure :/
140: Do I believe people are capable of change? - yeah, if they’re really trying and realize that they need to, but even if they do change i know not everyone will accept them back into their lives and it shouldn’t be expected that they should after someone changes for the better
141: Have I ever been underweight? - no
142: Am I ticklish? - very and i have this weird tactile thing thats like i dont like ppl lightly touching me, it freaks me out
143: Have I ever been in a submarine? - no
144: Have I ever been on a plane? - yes!! I love flying!! Its so much fun!!
145: In a film about my life, who would I cast as myself, friends and family? - uhhhh,, im going to go by face,, i think for me - shailene woodley bc when she had her short hair ppl told me i looked like her @meme - liana liberato, she got the round face @keen - winona ryder (but back in beetlejuice) boyfriend - tucker west, i know he’s not an actor but he looks so much like him,,,, also it took me forever just to find these guys so im not finding family :p
146: Have I ever been overweight? - no
147: Do I have any piercings? - i have my ears pierced!
148: Which fictional character do I wish was real? - hari jurono,,, i love him ;-;
149: Do I have any tattoos? - no, but i already have some picked out that i want
150: What is the best decision I have made in life so far? - ummmm??? Im not sure?????
151: Do I believe in Karma? - yeah
152: Do I wear glasses or contacts? - contacts during the day and glasses at night
153: What was my first car? - i have a subaru crosstrek named inko!!! I love her!!
154: Do I want children? - no
155: Who is the most intelligent person I know? - my mom tbh,,, shes really smart
156: My most embarrassing memory? - omfg,, so this goes to show how oblivious i am about social interactions, but it was my first week in college and this junior was talking to me and i didnt realize he was flirting with me until after we traded snapchats and he left, so i panicked and never said anything to him again and blocked him
157: What makes me nostalgic? - when i walk around my neighborhood sometimes (i live near the preschool i went to) and i was over at my elementary school almost a year ago now, but i remember walking down the hall and seeing all the different teachers there now and it made me sad
158: Have I ever pulled an all-nighter? - yes, just last week
159: Which do I value more in others, brains or beauty? - brains
160: What colour mostly dominates my wardrobe? - darker colors like black and blue, but im trying to get lighter ones in there too
161: Have I ever had a paranormal experience? - yes, many times, but the one that sticks out to me is that one night i woke up at like 5 am for no reason, but i was just suddenly wide awake and something felt off, so i was trying to get comfy again and flipped over on my other side so i was facinging the door into my room instead of my wall and in front of my door was a tall black figure with red eyes staring at me and when i blinked it went away,, now i know this can be explained by some other things but with my family it seems more likely to be paranormal
162: What do I hate most about myself? - uhh, i procrastinate way too much
163: What do I love most about myself? - i always support my friends
164: Do I like adventure? - depends on the adventure,,, i like traveling, but not too much walking bc i have bad knees
165: Do I believe in fate? - not really
166: Favourite animal? - question 47
167: Have I ever been on radio? - no, but i was on my school’s announcements and i hated it
168: Have I ever been on TV? - no
169: How old am I? - 19
170: One of my favourite quotes? - “The Gods envy us. They envy us because we’re mortal, because any moment could be our last. Everything is more beautiful because we’re doomed”
171: Do I hold grudges? - im petty
172: Do I trust easily? - no,, im just cautious around ppl bc i just don’t know them
173: Have I learnt from my mistakes? - some of them
174: Best gift I’ve ever received? - im not too sure,,, i got a p cool backpack for my birthday tho that i use everyday
175: Do I dream? - yeah, cant remember too many tho
176: Have I ever had a night terror? - no??
177: Do I remember my dreams, and what is one that comes to mind? - can’t remember a lot after i wake up, but i just recently had one with some bnha characters in it, i can’t remember what happened, i just know that they were there
178: An experience that has made me stronger? - i know this might sound a bit morbid, but my aunt’s funeral, it was the first funeral i went to where i understood what was happening and it made me more open to learning and accepting death
179: If I were immortal, what would I do? - want to fucking die,,, i’ve never understood ppl who are scared of dying/want to live forever,, like why would you want that??? What’s the point??? You’ll just watch everyone you love die,,, i know it’s going to be hard on me when that happens to my closer family members, but even the new ppl you befriend,, i just couldn’t
180: Do I like shopping? - yeas
181: If I could get away with a crime, what would I choose to do? - tax evasion
182: What does “family” mean to me? - the ppl who i care about deeply and who love me, not all of them are blood related and not all the blood related ones are part of it
183: What is my spirit animal? - idk?????? Maybe a turtle???
184: How do I want to be remembered? - tbh, i don’t really want to be remembered
185: If I could master one skill, what would I choose? - drawing
186: What is my greatest failure? - im not sure
187: What is my greatest achievement? - uhh, i feel like its hard to point at a specific point and be like “that was the best thing i could have done, if i didn’t do that i wouldn’t be who i am today”
188: Love or money? - money
189: Love or career? - career
190: If I could time travel, where and when would I want to go? - probably to some point in the future,, i dont know where tho
191: What makes me the happiest? - the ppl i care about being happy
192: What is “home” to me? - the house i currently live in,, my family is here and im surrounded by ppl i love,, it’ll probably change with time, but for now its here
193: What motivates me? - spite
194: If I could choose my last words, what would they be? - it’s important to keep moving forward, don’t let the past hold you down
195: Would I ever want to encounter aliens? - kind of, i think it would be p cool
196: A movie that scared me as a child? - it wasn’t a movie but i know the animated wolf from peter and the wolf freaked me out
197: Something I hated as a child that I like now? - i hated mushrooms, but i love them now
198: Zombies or vampires? - vampires
199: Live in the city or suburbs? - suburbs super close to city
200: Dragons or wizards? - DRAGONS
201: A nightmare that has stayed with me? - its silly but when i was younger it would be my mom and i going to the mall downtown and the escalators were missing the part that connected them to the floor so you had to hop over it and when we would get to the 4th floor i would miss the jump and fall
202: How do I define love? - i know a lot of ppl are like “i would die for you or kill for you” something along those lines but i think it’s more living for someone, wanting to see them accomplish everything they wanted, being there for them during their lows203: Do I judge a book by its cover? - yeah, i wont pick up something that doesnt catch my eye
204: Have I ever had my heart broken? - no
205: Do I like my handwriting? - yeah!! Its loopy
206: Sweet or savoury? - sweet
207: Worst job I’ve had? - ive liked all the jobs ive had
208: Do I collect anything? no
209: Item of clothing or jewellery you’ll never see me without? - a hoodie/sweater of some kind
210: What is on my bucket list? - going to greece
211: How do I handle anger? - i usually rant for a bit, maybe cry to get the extra hormones out, maybe break something
212: Was I named after anyone? - no, but i did have the same name as my great grandma
213: Do I use sarcasm a lot? - yes
214: What TV character am I most like? - im been watching bnha a lot so i think either kirishima or uraraka
215: What is the weirdest talent I have? - i can cross my eyes and then move one of them
216: Favourite fictional character? - ,,,,, im not sure,, i really love eric from divergent
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