#Fellas it is the year of backing onto that gay shit
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rain code dlc thoughts
watched em all (spoilers obviously)
desuhiko:
can't believe this guy literally tried flirting with a child. he has gone unchecked for too long. we need to beat him up
enyne is good. i would love to see her in a cool thief outfit
not worth $5
fubuki:
the interactions between the detectives were cute. but i wish she'd gotten a chance to shine more on her own
it was kind of aggravating how slow they solved the mystery though. all that wondering about what the numbers could possibly mean... y'all the die was right there
not worth $5
halara:
kind of a shame that this one was the only actual investigative one. it was great!!! i liked the mystery setup and i liked figuring out how the culprit pulled it off even if the identity of the culprit was obvious the moment he showed up
"Good girl, Sugar" lololololol
good to know halara can be bought with cats instead of shien. love that yakou's totally onto their shit
and the cat they have a picture of is REAL!!! IT'S NOT A RANDOM JPG FROM THE INTERNET (WHICH I HAD ASSUMED)
worth $5
vivia:
i love how before it came out we were all like "please... one conversation with yakou... even just a mention of him would be okay" and then we got hit with a flaming rainbow fist #LoveWins
vivia all like "i wish i had something in this world to care about" and yakou literally forcing open the doors to his cold dead heart in response
the way he keeps flashing back to all the little things yakou has done to care for him... vivia you can't deny the truth anymore. you can't run from these gay thoughts
fellas is it gay to be another man's reason for living? (only if you share an umbrella)
for those who don't know, sharing an umbrella is like the most romantic thing you can do in japan. the only way this could have been more explicitly textually gay is if one of them pointed out how beautiful the moon was.
where's my Melt amv
'i'll enjoy the scenery along the way' *yakou seductively swaying his hips back and forth* HELLO???????????????????????
i hope after that is when vivia finally agrees to that dinner date
honestly up until now i've been very attached to the idea of vivia being head over heels for yakou the whole time and yakou not ever really noticing but now???? my god. this chief really can bisexual
speaking of bi i'm also not opposed to the idea of vivia/ryo... them both being like 'i'm interested in you' 'i'm interested in you too' oh are you now? hmmmm...
and they were both ghosts (oh my god they were ghosts)
I was saying to my friends while we were playing it that it makes sense the first suicide was 5 years ago, before the blank week incident... because otherwise she wouldn't have been a ghost at all, just a walking corpse
loved that line btw. 'all humans are just walking corpses' good news vivia, you're among peers here in kanai ward
worth $5. i mean technically since vivia/yakou dlcs are bundled together (gaaaay) it only cost $2.50 so it's extra worth it.
the amount of fanfiction that will inevitably come out of this is worth way more than $5
yakou:
his hips still do the little wiggle even as a zombie. can't slay the sashay away <3
him thinking of all the other detectives.... UUU....
yuma's flashback is from ch5 after yakou's already dead (but clearly there's still enough of him left...)
desuhiko's... is it from the dlc? idk. he said "i won't cause any problems" and then went on to cause many problems
halara's scene from the dlc is clearly a moment that made a big impression on yakou LMFAO... i mean if halara nightmare sat in MY chair it would make an impression on me too :flushed:
fubuki's i'm pretty sure is from ch.4 as yakou is dying on the floor?? he must have felt so bad, hearing her cry so much while he was fading away and couldn't do anything about it... his last moments UUUUUU
vivia gets the FUCKING aforementioned umbrella scene. sad wet cat man. learning to accept kindness and finding something (someone) worth living for... the exact moment vivia falls in love with him lmfao. and this is the moment that sticks out in yakou's zombie brain. seeing someone in need and actually being able to reach out and help them (for once). ;_;
and then SHE!!!!!!! SHEEEEEEEEEE
i shrieked when i saw her
mad she STILL doesn't have a name but oh man. i love her. i mean i already loved her when i saw the labcoat + turtleneck combo but the GLASSESSSSSS. and her VOICE AARGGGHHH they picked the perfect va for her
She must've given him the glasses while she was still alive, since he's the one wearing them in The Photo. good call, he looks naked without them
and now we really understand why yakou is as pitifully broke as he is, because he can't bring himself to make the corrupt choice that screws over innocent people for the sake of money. love that for him. he suffers so much for the sake of his city
very funny that he couldn't recognize his childhood friend (i'm assuming she recognized him immediately from across the room lmao). love the idea that she's trans. they're t4t your honor
she asked the most useless man to be her bodyguard but we all know who's protecting whom lmao
i feel like she must have been the one who proposed to him. or at least knowingly coaxed him into it haha
AND THE BADGE... UUUUUU.... and her ghost led him to it.... she had such an important job to do...
need to see vivia talk to her now. ghost 2 ghost communication. yakou simp 2 yakou simp
i think she would tell yakou to go kiss that goth boy silly
and most importantly... the medicine. the research... her dream lives on... i thought it was stupid that makoto literally cancelled everything about the homunculus research - sure they didn't need to make any more but how about research into alternate diets? or uv protection beyond like. sunscreen. WHAT ABOUT HER RESEARCH MAKOTO. PLEASE
so the existence of a possible cure for zombie homunculus begs the question... what's next for yakou? we thought his story was done but turns out it's far from yakouver, bitches. he's coming back one way or another.
what will he do with this magical macguffin - bring it to somewhere they can analyze it and duplicate it, or just take the pill himself? how complete is this untested theoretical cure? will yakou Come Back Wrong? is he gonna struggle to speak? (though that'd be a waste of kaiji tang)... is he gonna struggle with the urge to, you know, eat human flesh? i think that would be pretty hot cool
of course there's the chance it won't work at all. or will just straight up kill him, speedrun to reuniting with dead wife
definitely worth $5. or $2.50.
but at the same time since it actually does continue the main plot of rain code in an interesting way (or hint at it) i think they should bundle it with the main game instead of vivia's dlc
i mean if i had it my way they'd ALL be free but... i get it. they gotta gauge popularity somehow (and pay the devs/vas for extra work)
anyway. i should be working on homework but no. this game has absolutely ruined me
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The Saga of Guy and Kyle
Because the people demanded it (two. two people demanded it.), here it is: the ultimate GuyKyle arc, and the one that made me ship these two.
So this takes place a couple years after Hal returns from the dead and the Green Lantern Corps is restored. During the time that Kyle was the only Green Lantern and Guy was Warrior, they got along well and Guy was one of Kyle’s mentors, but they weren’t super close. However, once they’re both Lanterns, Kyle is instantly in full “you jump, I jump, Jack” mode:
To make this absolutely clear: this is Kyle volunteering to stay on Oa with Guy FOR A YEAR.
A year together is insufficient, so they decide to move to Oa together permanently and open a bar:
(Patrick Gleason draws the best Guy and the absolute fucking worst Kyle.)
Shortly after this, Kyle and fellow Lantern Soranik Natu are on a mission together and they encounter a Star Sapphire who accurately pegs Kyle as a serial monogamist desperate for love, and less accurately pegs Soranik as the ballbusting career woman at the beginning of a Hallmark movie who needs to move to the country and fall in love with a guy who runs a Christmas tree farm. She tells them to gaze into her Star Sapphire crystal and it will reveal what their heart desires:
BUT KYLE IS LYING! HE DOESN’T EVEN OWN A CHRISTMAS TREE FARM!
It’s also moot, because the Guardians have just instituted a new law forbidding fraternization between Lanterns. Guy and Kyle agree that it’s bullshit:
I love this, because Guy is like “Out here in space, you’re inevitably going to fall in love with your partner”...but Soranik isn’t Kyle’s partner! GUY IS! KYLE HE IS HITTING ON YOU.
Soranik and Kyle decide to date in secret, but Kyle eventually confesses the truth to Guy: he didn’t see Soranik in the crystal, he saw his then-dead ex-girlfriend Jade. Guy tells him not to waste his life pining over someone who’s gone when Soranik is alive.
Guy’s line here makes me INSANE considering what’s about to happen.
And then: Blackest Night begins. Oa is swarmed by thousands of Black Lantern rings, all sent to resurrect the dead Lanterns in the crypt on Oa and turn them into Black Lanterns.
Guy: “Tell the people you love that you love them if you’re about to die.” Kyle: “CHECK.”
During the battle, an alpha battery (don’t worry about it) ruptures and is about to explode. Kyle takes it to the defunct central battery, in the process luring a lot of the Black Lanterns away from the battle, then forms a dome with his ring to keep them trapped inside when the battery explodes. And then he says goodbye:
YOU TOLD HIM TO TELL YOU HE LOVD YOU, GUY, AND HE DID. (We’ll ignore the “like a brother” bit, because, uh. Just wait.)
The resulting explosion reignites the central battery, which the GLs desperately need, but Kyle is dead. Soranik and Guy race to his side, and Soranik, who is a doctor, starts CPR, while Guy tries to stop Kyle’s ring from leaving him to find a new host:
HE IS CRYING AND HOLDING KYLE’S HAND
YESSSSSSS
Guy goes absolutely apeshit on the Black Lanterns, pausing only to scream Kyle’s name. You know. In a brotherly way.
Meanwhile, the same Star Sapphire from before is able to use the power of Soranik’s love to resuscitate Kyle, who pops back up, SEXIER THAN EVER, okay Gleason you did a good job this time:
Crotch-eye view, like god intended.
Things are still REALLY REALLY DIRE for the GLs, but Kyle’s main priority is Guy, even if that would be strategically unwise:
Guy’s rage is so destructive that it’s one of the only things that’s keeping the GLs from being completely overwhelmed by the Black Lanterns, but Kyle’s like “But it might be hurting him, so tough shit, universe!” THE HEART THAT’S BEATING IS THE ONE YOU JUMP OFF THE CLIFF FOR.
Fellas, is it gay to climb on top of your friend and tenderly cup his face in your hands while you beg him to come back to you?
It’s at this point that Mogo, the GL planet, shows up and just...sucks everybody onto its surface and...eats the Black Lanterns? Which is like, thanks, buddy, but why didn’t you do that before?
Anyway, this means that the only threat left is Guy, who turns on the GLs now that the Black Lanterns are gone, unable to control the rage of the Red Lantern ring. The GLs manage to briefly subdue him, but it’s not going to hold. And they can’t just yank the ring off, because if they do, Guy will die.
This is so funny to me. Kyle, you liar! Again! Kilowog, who has been good friends with Guy since the 80s, also knows that Kyle’s a liar and Guy wouldn’t have said that, and Kyle admits that Guy said to kill him before he hurts anyone.
Luckily, Mogo has another deus ex machina solution: he creates a little pool for them to drop Guy in, where, uh...leeches purify his blood by sucking all the Red Lantern energy out of it. It’s a little gross to look at and VERY gross to think about, so let’s just skip to...
AWWWWWWW.
“I thought I lost you.” Oh my GOD, be more cliche, you two. Incredible.
But wait, there’s more!
There’s one last climactic Blackest Night battle on Earth, and then our heroes return to Oa, triumphant but exhausted - not to mention pretty damn pissed at the Guardians, who could have averted a lot of Blackest Night if they had been less secretive and manipulative. Guy, Kyle, and Arisia (my queen!) storm into the Guardians’ citadel to yell at them about it, but Kyle is mostly focused on the prohibition against fraternization. He points out that they need every last Lantern and a lot resigned when they were told they couldn’t be Lanterns and be together, and that it’s love that makes the Corps so powerful. Guy’s like “Uh, yeah, what he said” and they leave.
The Guardians love Kyle the mostest out of all the Lanterns, so they rescind the law. Guy and Kyle, hanging out in the ruins of Warriors, are pleased to hear it:
I just want to make it clear: we see Soranik reacting to the news that she and Kyle can date publicly. You know, just in case we forgot Kyle has a girlfriend (the one who is canonically not his soulmate), because he has spent the past four issues obsessing over Guy. Theoretically, Kyle made that speech for Soranik - and yet rather than go see her, he decides to continue to sit practically in Guy’s lap in their shared business, TOASTING TO THEIR RELATIONSHIP. LIKE BROS DO.
In conclusion, Guy and Kyle are in love, Soranik deserves better than to be the heroine of a Hallmark movie, and don’t ever trust the Guardians about anything.
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I love Colin, I love Ted Lasso writers a very not so normal amount let me tell ya.
This gonna be a stupid rant please bear with me.
As a football fan (Chelsea darling you need to get your shit together asap), I know damn well how this toxic and homophobic this community can be. There is a famous Spanish goalkeeper who once stated on the bird app that he was gay (tho he’s happily married to a woman), and one of his teammates was just… played along with that ig? At first, I thought he was so brave to say that publicly, I might have well defended him on every online post laughing at him and his “sexuality” (yes, all of those comments were horrible— and yes, I’m glad that I did not do that). Only later the gk said his account was hacked. They were just making fun of coming out in football without realising how much hurt they had caused to the queer community. And I never felt disgusted towards them ever like that before. And no one, not a single soul felt bad for the ones’d been hurt. They just laughed it off and everything went on like usual.
Unlike in women’s league, we hardly see any out men players in major leagues (5 ones: England, France, Spain, Italia, Germany). Even if we know someone, he was no longer playing, at all. That’s just the world we’re living in. Though I must acknowledge the effort they’re putting on during every specific occasion in a year.
Back to Colin. I was so touched and emotional when hearing him sharing his deep down thoughts.
“I don’t want to be a spokeperson. I don’t want a bunch of apologies.”
Colin does not need to stand out. He does not want to stand in the spotlight and talk about his sexuality, to be an influencer of something like that. He just wants his life to be exact the way it is, and it is not about feeling ashamed or something. I have a strong feeling that he will not come out to the world. Colin just has a little secret to himself (and to his himbos family only). And I believe he’s happy with it.
That being said, Colin does not want to put any pressure on his teammates when they find out he’s gay. He knows they love him for whoever he is, and they might feel guilty because of those previous disrespect comments, but Colin does not blame them. As long as they care for him (of course!), then Colin feels no need to hear any apologises.
“All I want, is for when we win a match, to be able to kiss my fella the same way the boys kiss their girls”
My heart just dropped dead onto the floor. Oh how many times have Colin witnessed other players got to kiss their lovers and wished he could be like them. He saw Jamie, Sam, and then Roy have lovely moments with their love interests, with everyone else cheering and supporting. Hope to see his ahead journey when at least now someone knows and understands his feeling. For the first time, he actually feels “seen”.
Trent and Colin conversation will forever be engraved in my brain. Such a healthy and heart-warming moment between them. It’s safe to say Sunflowers is my favourite episode from Ted Lasso, I laughed and I squeaked and I teared up and I died at every shot. This episode is a fucking masterpiece!!
P/S: I let out a sigh of relief when they haven’t killed off Michael yet. Colin deserves every bit of happiness and love please don’t take Michael away from him I’m begging youuuu
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fellas is it gay to see a cute guy at university who just dropped his papers then help him out with that and spend too long staring at his pretty face to say anything and then 7 years later he falls onto you while drunk and kisses you and you kiss back, to be polite ofc, and then he passes out and the next time you meet you hold his hand and introduce yourself and stare into his eyes lovingly and then after his home gets attacked invite him to stay at your house and when he realizes you are giving him your bed he tells you that you can just share the bed with him and from then on you basically live together with him cooking and so you wake up in the morning to his food which is specifically made based on the story you told him about your childhood and then you guys keep on almost dying and being attacked and at some point both of you have held a gun to each other and then eventually once you’re safe you go into the forest knowing he’ll follow you bc he has your gps location and when he shows up all worried you act like you’re being chased bc of the box your holding and then when your friends who you made dress up in all black and ski masks threaten you at gunpoint, which is what you asked them to do, you make him open the box and inside is the cheesiest most romantic shit in the entire world with a ring at the bottom and then you ask if he’ll marry you and he says yes and then cut to a scene where he says that this place is beautiful bc you are with him and then you look into each other’s eyes and thank the other for being with you and then it pans to a shot of you guys holding hands with matching wedding rings on and then you promise to take him here forever and then you touch foreheads then hug then tenderly hold each other while looking at the beautiful scenery
is it gay?
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Okay @princekirijo you want an essay? Well here it is now, or as I like to call it Felix's "Asumari is great and this fandom has no fucking taste" rambling and infodump. Congrats fellas, thanks to Prince you ALL get an asumari essay. But before that I'll try to give you a rundown of Mari and Asuka.
(I'm also so sorry for putting this long ass post on everyone's dashboard)
(Spoiler warning for Evangelion 3.0+1.0 Thrice Upon a Time!!)
Alright on one hand we have Mari Illustrious Makinami. Her whole deal? She's a walking ray of sunshine, literally lol. Unlike any other character in the Evangelion franchise she doesn't suffer from her trauma, she's quite literally the only healthy and functioning human being, she's just slightly leaning towards "batshit crazy" with the stunts she pulls 🤷♂️. Other than that she just loves living, she loves being with people, she keeps moving forward, stays positive and decides to live life to it's fullest even after she experiences loss and multiple apocalyptic events (Second Impact, Third Impact, etc.) and she really just embodies the joy of living. That's all there is to her, or at least all we know.
On the other hand, we have Asuka Langley Shikinami who is... well it's hard to explain what she is to be honest. She's part-German and part-Japanese and part of a line of clones specifically made with the purpose to pilot an Evangelion and later on be used as a sacrifice to trigger another Impact (ITS COMPLICATED I KNOW-) Asuka is, unlike Mari, very much suffering from her trauma. She doesn't have her parents and has a very deep seated belief that she's completely alone, which she says doesn't matter as long as she can pilot the Eva. She also very much wants to fight and kill angels all by herself, and it's seriously messing with her when she can't achieve that.
Now we get to the more interesting parts (hopefully this so far wasn't too confusing, then again it's Eva and even I can't fully wrap my head around it all LMAO)
In the second Rebuild movie (Evangelion 2.0 You can (not) advance) we get introduced to both of them, Mari's introduction scene (in the original English dub) has her pilot an Eva and singing about how she'll take the world on by herself, while in the third movie's (Evangelion 3.0 You can (not) redo) opening scene she's piloting the Eva again but this time it's together with Asuka (in her own Unit 02 though) and during that Mari sings about how wonderful it is not to be alone. It's nothing big yet, but it's a really cute detail me thinks,,, you know what else I love about them? They bicker and they banter and it's genuinely so fun to listen to shskdhsuwj
(For a quick catch up: During the end of 2.0 Shinji (the protagonist) triggers another apocalyptic event, the Near Third Impact, and was only stopped due to Kaworu (the guy in my pfp) stepping in. Also between 1.0/2.0 and 3.0/3.0+1.0 are about 14 years (without Shinji bc he's like comatose) where A LOT happens AND we learn in 3.0 that Eva pilots don't age physically bc of "The curse of the Eva"... honestly Eva is wild lmao)
Okay okay I'll get back to it!
So one thing that happens is that Asuka during 2.0 develops a crush on Shinji (girl why-), unfortunately things take a turn for the worse. Asuka had volunteered to be the testpilot for a new Eva (Unit 03), she seemed happy at the time and it was a really sweet build up with the "I can smile, I didn't know I could still do that."-line. And then? Then it turns out the Ninth Angel had infected Unit 03 (Angels are basically the Kaijus they fight using Evas btw). The thing goes on a loose and Shinji is forced to fight it (With Asuka inside mind you), he refuses and his father uses an autopilot to destroy Unit 03. And boy did it destroy the angel, well it and it crushed Asuka between its jaws (you can actually hear her scream btw haha pain :)).
Asuka survived though, but the whole incident cost her her humanity and she ended up becoming an angel herself/she took the place of the Ninth. But despite that, there's one person who keeps believing in Asuka's humanity, who fiercely believes Asuka is still a human and tells her as much.
Yep, that one person is Mari and she keeps holding onto that belief until the very end when Asuka uses her last resort, which is using the power of an angel (Doing so was a guaranteed death sentence btw). Mari's own words (in the German dub) were, "Princess, you're giving up being human…" AND IT MAKES ME SO EMO GOD FUCK
While I'm at it, Mari and Asuka are a fucking killer combo as a team. They rely on each other for support in combat, listen to the other's orders and advice. Especially in Asuka's case it's kind of a big deal that she so openly relies and counts on Mari's support. Like these two trust each other with their damn lifes!!! Holy shit!!
Guess what though, they also have nicknames for eachother. Mari always calls Asuka "Princess" or "(Your) Highness" while Asuka calles Mari "Four-eyes" / "Four-eyed chrony (idk how you spell that tbh RIP" Even better though, in the German dub Asuka calls Mari "Brillerella" as in a combination of "Brille" (German for glasses) and "Cinderella",,,,Cinderella and her Prince,,,Brillerella and her Princess,,, man, that was a gay fucking move of the translation team. Spoiler: I owe them my life.
Funfact: There's exactly two times throughout the Rebuild movies where Mari uses Asuka's actual name. These two times being when she watches Asuka "die" and be used as a sacrifice for Gendo's selfish plan and when later on she begs Shinji, "So please the Princess… Asuka needs your help!" And the best part? That wasn't even the first time she did that. The mentioned line came from 3.0+1.0, but she did that too in 3.0 with the, "At least save the Princess!" line (although her tone was much more...pissed, like she was really angry lol)
Remember the crush Asuka had on Shinji? Well due to the Unit 03 incident a whole lot of other shit got mixed into that and her feelings for him in general became really bitter (understandably so). Now Mari being who she is sometimes teases Asuka about said old crush but she really does want Asuka to get closure and sort that mess out.
As an example for the teasing, in 3.0 there's a scene that goes like this (please imagine Mari with a literal :3 face while saying that):
"Unit! Are you back in the game?"
"I'm on it, your Highness. But first things first, how was our little puppy (Shinji)? Did he sit like a good little boy?"
"He's exactly the same! Same stupid face talking mayhem!"
"That goofy face of his, that's what you wanted to see? Riiiiight?"
"Shut up! I went there to bat him one!... And I feel better!"
There's also a very short bonus manga that was released in Japan for Thrice Upon a Time's release that has Mari trying to convince Asuka to come with her on the mission to get Shinji, given everything that follows, it's just another thing to prove my point. And the final bit relating to that is this:
"Feeling better now?"
"Yeah, I do feel better."
That's the exchange Asuka and Mari have after they talked to Shinji, it's nothing special but I think it's really sweet and this time Asuka actually sounded like she was feeling better instead of when she was screaming after she nearly broke pretty thick glass with her fist (If she had hit someone with that much force she definitely would've broken something omggg #violentimpulsesgang)
To get back on track though: I already mentioned it but during the second half of 3.0+1.0 Asuka "dies" (and honestly that entire scene is worth its own in-depth post because its just one huge parallel to The End of Evangelion), the point is: You can tell that the loss of Asuka honestly hits Mari hard. Not only because of how Mari screams Asuka's name but also because of her expressions. They're pained, like really fucking pained and Mari even apologizes to her that she has to fall back due to the fact that she's injured AND because eveything is going wrong.
After the events of Evangelion 3.0 these two got seperated from eachother, Mari was with WILLE (the organization both of them are with) and on board of Wunder (the ship WILLE basically operates from) while Asuka was in a Village full of (Near) Third Impact Survivors. When they do meet again it went like this:
Asuka, barely back, comes to the door and calls, "I'm back." And within seconds of Asuka stepping into their room after the door opens Mari already runs towards her, arms wide open and she says, "Welcome back, your Highness! Good job. I missed you so much!" And she says that while she literally nuzzles into Asuka,,,like,,,what the fuck gay people real!!!
Best part? Asuka clearly has enough strength to push Mari completely away if she were uncomfortable, but she doesn't. Asuka merely wanted enough space to look at the room (because Mari managed to horde even more books lol) and play her game. During their entire renunion Mari keeps hugging her, and part of me thinks that perhaps deep down Asuka actually enjoys the feeling of physical affection.
Before we get to the last point though, let me say that Asuka and Mari have scenes in 3.0+1.0 that parallel Shinji and Kaworu's from 3.0. (Fyi Kaworu loves Shinji (yeah, like that, and 3.0 was basically them being gay as fuck for an hour) so like...do I even need to explain?
And then of course there's also this, the "Take care of yourself, Princess…" line. That is the last time Mari talks to Asuka and as much as that line alone already is so much, it's Mari's expression in particular that kills me. Because this? This soft, almost bittersweet expression she has, as she basically says goodbye? Because she knows Asuka will finally be happy and safe? It just makes me feel so much actually. Man.
In the end it's a fact that Mari loved Asuka, wether that is interpreted as platonic or romantic by someone is up to them. But it is a fact that Asuka was loved enough that someone wanted to hug her, was happy to see her, to praise her, was hurt by her loss, wanted her to be safe, that someone told her "Take care of yourself…" Asuka was really and honestly so loved that someone would tell her, "I missed you."
But Asuka? Asuka was too hurt, too wrapped up in her own head to actually see how loved she was by Mari (and other people) that she genuinely believed she's completely alone and always will be alone.
It makes the "Take care of yourself" line hit even harder to me, because it's not only Mari's goodbye, but it's a goodbye during the one time Asuka allowed herself to be vulnerable and admit what she really wanted.
And honestly? All of this? Its makes me feel so many things and I just love them so much man.
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danny phantom 8-13 thoughts! again, under the cut bc I blew through 6 episodes in one go...
-LOVE THE WAY THE GHOST ZONE LOOKS. but theres fucking ghost cops??? ghost jail??? that SUCKS imagine dying and going to jail in your AFTERLIFE. danny going to JAIL WAS NOT something I expected. but seeing all the enemies together and work with danny to bust out. SO ICONIC I love that actually. and the thing about real world stuff acting as ghosts in the ghost zone is very cool.
-'there are some things more important that hunting ghosts!' mrs fenton says, about her husband forgetting their anaversary (FOR THE 18TH YEAR IN A ROW?? CHRIST) and not about, idk, their son clearly freaked out. she didnt even notice he was gone into the ghost zone!!! he might be a bad husband BUT shes not the best mom. they suck and I don't care about their relationship problems I care about these kids. danny doing his best to clean the house to keep his mom from getting mad at his dad?? hes such a good boy I want to cry, this is not his place, his dad should be cleaning his own shit up!!!
-maddie's butch lesbian sister is living my best life in her lil cabin. also being a snarky bitch to jack. queen. and her getting a 10th anniversary of her divorce. LOVE IT.
-mr. lancer being a cheerleader in his younger years makes perfect sense to me. king shit.
-dr. spectra's cat ears/mullet hairstyle?? sooo cute. I also just love the concept of a ghost just. sucking out people's positivity and feeding on emotions. a great villain. she put danny in a fucking diaper what the FUCK. and keeping it cold so no one would suspect shes a ghost??? INCREDIBLE. and her gay little blob sidekick. wlw mlm evil solidarity.
-JAZZ FOCUSED EP. YEAAAH!!! her first thought when she saw the ghosts was like 'omg i gotta tell danny :)' and her going to the teacher and also councilor trying to get help for him...shes just 16 but shes trying so hard to help him out :( watching this when youre younger I can imagine ppl are like omg annoying!! but watching this when im older im just like :( jazz baby im SO sorry </3 SHE BODIED THAT GHOST THOUGH. and the fact she didnt tell danny she knew surprised me. like, shes patient and waiting on him to tell her when hes ready!! thats so so sweet.
-christ the parents talking about 'PEELING IT LIKE AN ONION. AND EXAMINING REMAINS' of ghosts RIGHT INFRONT OF DANNY.
-'why am i so depressed and angry all the time!!' DANNY YOURE 14. i mean it IS a ghost this time, but...
-579$ top?? VALERIE NO ITS NOT EVEN CUTE IT DOESNT EVEN GO WITH THAT OUTFIT AAAA. tho this ep is called shades of gray..VALERIE FOCUSED EP FINALLY????! *THUNDEROUS APPLAUSE* I already knew about red huntress from my redesigns, but I didn't exactly know what that entails or how/why, so, it's fun to see the Origins.
-ghost pubby! ghost pubby!!!!! why is the dog a ghost?? the implication that the company had guard dogs and got rid of them...what did they DO. is it just the unfinished business?? of not having that toy it was looking for?? god I hope so.
I feel SOOO bad for valerie tho, my god. her friends are shunning her for what, because her dad lost her job and she had to move??? horrible. (and the fact the dog wrecked the moving van too...) I also love how 'from wisconsin' on the package was an IMMEDIATE RED FLAG FOR ME. WISCONSIN=EVIL NOW. vlads so petty.
-it took valerie like 5 mins to get the hang of hunting ghosts and shes already a much bigger threat than his parents tbh. who've been trying and studying this for years. and a more valid reason <3 love her shes so cute and cool. new daughter alert.
-'i should do SOMETHING to help valerie' no shit danny???
-'who is that, awesome outfit!' -top gay sam moments. i was going to say. before it immediately cuts to sam kissing danny LMFAOOO. don't think I like that, it puts tucker in a weird third wheel position... the next ep involves them holding hands and blushing when danny's cold...URGH No. not a fan ngl. the trope of 'if theres a girl in a trio she has to end up with one of the two guys!!'
-right as I say that they take it to extremes!! and ember shoots him with a love ray gun that makes him OBSESSIVE OVER SAM. AND SHE TAKES HIS HANDS AND SAYS 'YOU DONT FEEL THAT WAY ABOUT ME, I DONT FEEL THAT WAY ABOUT YOU' and her saying she doesnt want to be together like this. and tucker saying 'i always knew you two would get together!!' dont manifest it tucker please. the show pushing for it so hard makes me not want it KSHKJKJD I KNOW its probably canon. it sucks though. im a hater.
-vlad just LURKING AROUND THE SCHOOL GIVING VALERIE GIFTS ASJKDHKJ YOU WEIRD PETTY OLD MAN GO HOME!!!
-EMBERRRRR YOU WILL REMEMBERRRRRR . this is the one thing I kinda remember from when I was a kid EMBERRRRR ilu. top 10 cartoon bops. sams being a hater. popular things are popular for a reason. mr. lancer also being a hater. also everyone wearing her color scheme ..its a really good look, the purple, black, and minty color...
-penguins exist in the ghost zone. confirmed.
-EMBER JUST SHOWING UP AT A RANDOM HIGHSCHOOL TO PLAY?? UNANNOUNCED, MID DAY??? girl get a tour schedule. make some money or smth damn. I know shes probably doing it for the power boost but. lord. anyway if your show doesnt have a concert scene/ep, is it even valid.
-fellas is this gay. (she uses a GRAPPLING HOOK TO SHOOT OUT THE WINDOW AFTER SEEING AN EMBER VAN GO BY RIGHT AFTER THIS SHOT)
-hey, she had an undercut at some point!! my redesign!!! was accurate!! in..a way
-I feel like danny has a lot of pent up aggression ngl, him being heartbroken about sam and immediately going IM GONNA GO TAKE IT OUT ON EMBER. I mean she needs to be stopped I guess But. jazz has the right idea he needs therapy and a HEALTHY outlet.
-tucker singing > my singing
-girls cant be gamers -tucker and danny sexist moments. her being chaos in the game OWNED.
-TUCKERS HAT IS A BERET??? I THOUGHT IT WAS A BEANIE. SAM CALLED IT A BERET. WH.
-it was actually nice of lancer to let danny retake the test, and he go to play games again. smh. epic cringe gamer moments compilation. and driving him home!!! I actually like him as a character. anyway teachers like lancer are SO appreciated. I was failing middle school because of mental problems, and felt so dumb and got embarrassed by teachers who would just get onto me instead of bothering to ask what the real problem was, but when I was taking my ged classes I had a wonderful teacher who kept reassuring me that I was smart, and I got honors!! danny is SUCH a little shit to him (understandable, 14, but) but seeing them getting along better and danny putting in effort. SO CUTE. THATS MY SON, STUDYING HARD!!!! and being so PROUD OF HIMSELF!!! 91!!! BITCH!!! A- is STILL AN A!!!
-'why dont they ever realize thats me in a dress' mr lancer i am CRYING. i realized.
-technus being my ghost grandpa who cant game asking tucker for help. bless his heart. his out of date old ppl lingo circles back to being endearing <3 tucker not recognizing him despite the like, lack of any kind of serious disguise...I do love their lil in-game outfits....sam being the tank rules. I like technus' spider design also. more characters need to be giant freaky spiders, imo.
-finding your gf a new host because she cant maintain her ghost body outside the zone? amazing. using jazz as the host? ILL KILL YOU. jazz immediately accepting a ride home from a guy she just met and letting him know where she lives. letting him IN THE HOUSE??? nooo girl no lets use common sense </3
-sooo cringe the parents were like 'good job for spying on your sister' tho wtffff. doesnt matter if hes a bad guy, thats fucked. everytime these parents BREATHE im like. these are MY kids now <3
-BAD LUCK BEING A THEME OF THE 13TH EPISODE. thats super fun. johnny 13 being his name is so. iconic. your last name is a NUMBER? also goth tucker. I actually love the look. everyone looks good goth. 'the ladies love the eyeliner and onyx nail polish' sam you are sooo right every man needs to at least try those two things. im a lesbian and I agree. same, danny, your bff is gnc af
-LOVE kitty's design. and just, the concept of a ghost with a bike. couple goals, except yes stay away from jazz.
#danny phantom#sanchoyorambles#s1 is only 20 eps?#i can probably#finish within a week#i like binging shows asdf#ive been watching it all night#gonna work out now#dp thoughts
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*THE* mean-girl-dean-girl's Supernatural reboot MEGAPOST!
I'm gonna stick a little "keeping reading" here because hoooooo boy, this is a very long post.
Let's start with
Plot
Season 1
Dean kills John while they are out on a hunt in a crime of passion, but Dean doesn't remember because he blacked out. Cue Dean going to Stanford to get Sam and tell him "Dad's on a hunting trip... and he hasn't been home in a couple days."
The audience doesn't know what happened to John, but slowly figures it out with Dean and Sam as Dean slowly remembers what happened that night.
The entire first season, the boys are following the trail John left and fighting monsters as well. They find out Dean was with John, Sam realizes Dean has an unreliable memory, they have heart to hearts about their childhood and the fire, they find John's body, "how could you kill Dad?" but maybe Dean didn't kill dad, whooaaaaaa, misdirection.
It was actually good ole yeller eyes (Azazel) and he made it look like Dean killed John.
Okay, now let's move on to the first episode
Not sure how the opening would work, I would like the story of the fire to be revealed over the course of the first season, but maybe the opening scene could be a little bit of an establishing character relationships and backstory, idk, I haven't thought that far yet.
I'm thinking maybe it's like, Dean gets back to a motel room covered in blood and he listens to a voicemail on his phone from John saying he was on a hunt or something, I don't really know lol.
HOWEVER
I do know that after the intro rolls, we get a scene of Sam waking up to his alarm and "Nine to Five" by Dolly Parton starts playing.
Y'all know where this is going.
Cue a montage of Sam's normal Stanford college life (him sitting through lectures, walking through the campus with friends) spliced with scenes of Dean absolutely slaughtering a nest of vampires (or some other monsters, whatever works best.)
But
Now onto
Characters!!! (And descriptions)
Dean Winchester
Some lovely person on this site made edits of Dean with platinum blond hair and it made me feel some kind of way so we're doing that, homie's gonna have platinum blond hair
Side note about the hair, later when the brothers are running from the FBI he dyes it a dirty blond/light brown (insert jackles hair color controversy here) as a disguise.
He also gets tattoos because we were robbed.
Speaking of tattoos, concept: when Dean comes back from Hell, all of his tattoos are gone. His body is a clean slate, devoid of tattoos, scars, etc. So he gets his tattoos done all over again, which he doesn't mind because he made some bad, drunk tattoo decisions in his youth.
(And before you ask, yes, he does get one for Cas, either a bee or Cas's name in enochian, something cute.)
Dean goes to therapy after Sam gets sent to the Cage.
It's actually court mandated because he got in trouble, lol, he would never go to therapy on his own.
Along with the hair, Dean gets to be the grade A twunk we all know he is.
Sam Winchester
His hair gets longer in every scene he's in
No jk, but imagine
King of Microaggressions
Sam starts off like the sweetheart he is in season 1 but in later seasons he starts enjoying killing a little too much...
It's that demon blood, ba-by!!!
He brings up issues of morality to Dean, i.e. killing monsters who aren't hurting anyone. (Yes I know this is contradictory to my previous statement, but these two facets of Sam can and will coexist.)
Sam and Jess's relationship is explored further, meaning we'll need to start with a different inciting incident, but that's fine, I think everyone can agree fridgings are *(thumbs down)*
Sam doesn't truly know what happened the night of the fire until later, and then he understands why Dean is so protective of him.
Jess
She gets to live beyond the first episode
She is also trans
No, I don't feel like I have to explain myself and I won't 💜
She urges Sam to join Dean in a search for their brother, kind of gets pulled into the hunter lifestyle by association lol.
She dies on a rusty nail after fighting vampires on a routine hunt with Sam
No jk!!!
But imagine....
She's amazing and I love her and Lucifer also uses her as leverage against Sam and possesses her because I think that'd be cool.
She supports Sam 100% and also she and Dean are buddies, pals if you will.
She meets Cas Thee El and immediately she Knows, that is a homosexual.
She dies still so that we can have a Saileen Endgame but she's not dying the first episode or in a fridging. Not on my watch.
Castiel
He gets to keep his raw, light-fixture-exploding power.
I want more of that "I pulled you out of hell, I can throw you back in" energy except over dumb shit like Dean not cleaning up after himself.
He looks like a Dilf in every scene he's in, yeah, that's right, dilf with a capital D for *(GUNSHOTS)* *(gets sent to horny jail)*
Claire
She gets pink hair
And more time with Cas
And maybe a nose piercing
Feel like she should be able to kill a couple angels onscreen, punch a couple homophobes
She gets to meet Jack and teaches him swears and fun slang words.
She deserves it.
Jack
I says "that's my baby and I'm proud."
Jack starts off as a baby, but like Amara he grows up super quickly.
Like, baby to 11 year old in a couple days or less.
This is because Jack's emotional age on the show is on par with that of a 5th grader.
It's at this point when he's a young kid that he runs away from the Bunker and shenanigans ensue.
It's also at this point that Dean threatens to k*ll him.
(Still not sure if I want that in my Supernatural (threatened infanticide? In my Supernatural? It's more likely than you think) but we'll see. We'll see.)
Throughout a majority of season 13, Jack is like an 11 y.o. kid
Season 14 he's like a 16 y.o. teenager
Season 15 he's 21, you get the picture.
Listen, I love Alex Calvert a lot. He's great.
But Jack is a child and should be a child.
Kelly Kline
Kelly, baby, stay right where you are, you're perfect.
Eileen
SHE DOESN'T DIE
SHE GETS TO BE IN THE FINALE BECAUSE SHE'S AMAZING AND I LOVE HER.
BLURRY WIFE WHO? I ONLY KNOW SAILEEN ENDGAME!
She teaches Claire and Jack swears in sign-language. Castiel is not impressed.
John
J*hn W*nchester stans, DNI.
He's dead.
We only see him in flashbacks and only sometimes hear his voice in voice overs.
He's not "down the road" from Dean in Heaven, in fact he instead gets to wander around in some Purgatory like Hell for the rest of his time :)
People who get to say "fuck" on the show:
Cas (but only Once)
Jody
Bobby
Now onto other things
I want more of
Ghostfacers
(they need more screentime because I love them)
Dean/Benny
We know they had a thing.
They definitely had a thing.
Demon Dean
Again, I feel like more should've been done with this. All that build up for what, 2 episodes? was not utilized well at all.
Dean's Bisexuality
Straight Dean truthers DNI, my Supernatural is a show about love and being true to yourself
You think Supernatural is a show about 2 straight brothers fighting monsters?
Naw bitch, this is a show about the Gay Experience
He will get to have relations with men on this show.
Of course, only after John dies does he, y'know, display it. Maybe he kisses Cas on his dad's grave just to fuck John over, make him roll in grave.
We all agree John would be/is a homophobe piece of shit, right?
Okay, glad we're on the same page.
Dads
3 men and a baby with Jack is what I'm saying.
I love it when the Trio are father-figures to younger troubled characters they see themselves in, even better if it's like reluctant-but-loving father figure, oh, that trope gets me every time :'^)
Dadstiel and DadDean are my favorites, but I like it when Sam plays "Uncle Sam" to kids too lol.
"Fellas, is it gay to want a tight knit family with your husband, his son, his vessel's daughter, your brother, his wife, your cop mother figure and her wife and their adopted daughters? Asking for a friend."
Garth
Biggest flaw of Supernatural was underutilizing Garth.
I will never not be bitter that Garth was only in like, 7 episodes out of the whole 15 season series.
Every episode with Garth gets immediately 5 times better.
I love Garth.
Follow ups on characters who had entire episodes featured around them and then just... vanished???
This is mostly about Jesse, the magic kid whose imagination ruled an entire town like, his daddy was a demon and nothing came of that kid??? Only one episode about him?? No follow up???
KID CAN MANIPULATE REALITY AND WE'RE NOT GONNA GET A FOLLOW UP ON THAT?????
Uh, there was that one episode with Ennis the guy whose girlfriend was killed by a monster? I think?? Who we never see again, that was weird.
Tamara from season 3, episode 1.
And of course-
Cassie
She was so cool, and then we never saw her again :////
She gets to be a badass.
Religious imagery
As a former Catholic school student who has become for the most part, disillusioned with religion, religious imagery in TV shows like Supernatural make my brain go "brrrrrr."
Fun episodes!!!
Like, after season 6 or so, there's a drop in funny episodes
I'm talking Changing Channels, The French Mistake type stuff. (Scoobynatural is an outlier and should not be counted.)
So anyway
In my version we would have more fun episodes
I'm thinking
GENDER-SWAP EPISODE, BABY!!
(why they didn't do that in the original, we'll never know.)
An episode where Dean gets to wear eyeliner
That's it, end of post.
I want less
Racism
Yeah I feel like this is self explanatory, nearly every reoccurring character in SPN is white, and black side characters normally die in the episode they first appear in, or they'll be featured as a villain (Uriel, Raphael, Billie, etc)
Also there's a lot of... uh... asian fetishism featured in the show (what with "Busty Asian Beauties) that's really gross, also Kevin was a bit of a stereotype...
Also also it's super yucky how they kill the gods from other religions like???? Uh??? That's super disrespectful, let's not do that????
I know Supernatural is like, inherently racist because monsters are a separate race that are seen as some dangerous "other" that must be eradicated by hunters in a form of genocide-
Okay we won't get into that but
Still
Stop killing all your POC
Fridgings/Unecessary murders of female characters
I know Supernatural starts with a fridging, so this will be a hard thing to remedy, but
One death that really pissed me off was the death of Charlie
Yeah, that was pointless and we're not doing that. Charlie gets to live and be an awesome aunt to Jack.
And also Claire
Charlie Bradbury Superiority
Charlie and Garth get to meet because they're nerd/geek solidarity.
British Men of Letters
I fucking hate these guys
They're "litcherally" the worst.
The worst part is that the actors they have playing the British AREN'T. EVEN. BRITISH.
And you can tell
Uh, and that's all for now, I'll add more later.
tag list for people who liked my "if this post gets one like I'll post my SPN reboot masterpost" post.
@darianyunidi @sarasidlesaid @crazybananaalpaca @playfulpanthress @ultfreakme @fififeelsmellow @heller-char @luna8eaton @princessmeganfire @insanebot109 @queenofnightsnow @mongoose-underthehouse
Thank you for the support, hope the wait was worth it.
#supernatural#spn#dean winchester#sam winchester#castiel#eileen leahy#jack kline#claire novak#john winchester#charlie bradbury#garth fitzgerald iv#jody mills#bobby singer#kelly kline#jess from spn#cassie from spn#destiel#deancas#saileen#saileen endgame#destiel endgame#long post#mean girl dean girl's supernatural#supernatural masterpost#mgdg's spn MEGAPOST
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winter prompt fill 5, indruck, nsfw?
5: your car slid into a snowbank and i’m the mechanic that comes to tow you
Two hours.
Two fucking hours, that’s how far this guy is from town. But because he’s three hours from the one to the west, it’s Duck’s company that got the call from AAA for a tow. On night three of what's forecasted as a week-long snowstorm. And because it’s that kind of job, the call came in at 4:45 pm. At least he’ll get overtime for this.
Being out of Kepler means the radio has real stations, half of them playing blocks of pop hits and the other half blaring Christmas carols. Duck doesn’t mind either, settles on listening to crooning about sleigh bells and winter wonderlands as he tries to keep the truck from sliding into snow piles.
He’s all prepared to be aggravated at whoever was clueless enough to get themselves stranded and stick him with the four hour round-trip, but the closer he gets to his destination the more he sympathizes. Because this is a rural two-lane highway and not a major through-road, the maintenance is spotty at best. Couple that with the still-falling snow and he’s just glad the guy was in the kind of accident where he could still make a call after it.
The last half-hour he’s down to thirty miles an hour, lets out a groan of relief when the dead taillights of a car reflect back at him. Once he positions the truck and hops out, he rolls his eyes; the sedan doesn’t have snow tires or chains on, something even a person with a Nevada license plate should have known to carry north.
Duck wonders if being unprepared is a habit when the driver steps out in far too light a coat for the weather, shuddering and stuttering out an “Th-thank g-goodness.”
“Guessin you’re Mr. Wilde?”
Pale hair falls over red glasses as the man nods. With his hood up, he looks owlish, guarded. He’s all limbs and edges, and Duck can’t help but think of a stray cat that needs a warm bed and some food.
“Go ahead and get up into the passenger seat. Heat ain’t runnin, but it’s sure as heck warmer than out here. I’ll get her hitched up and we can get going.”
Another nod, the man hunching forward as he scurries into the truck. This is the easy part, getting the damaged car hooked to the truck and freeing it from the snow. The hard part comes when they turn towards town, two hours of darkness and icy roads ahead of them.
“I’m so sorry you had to come all this way. I, ah, did not intend to crash, nor to do so this far from help.”
“Hey, it’s what we’re here for. Gonna be slow goin on the way back, since it’ll be real fuckin embarassin to call a tow truck for a tow truck.”
A snicker, “I picture them as growing exponentially larger, like nesting dolls. A tow truck towing a tow truck towing a tow truck towing a car would be the size of a semi.”
Duck chuckles, “Yeah, it’d be a sight. And a fuckin nightmare for anyone who got behind it.”
The cab is warming nicely, so his passenger pulls back his hood. In the darkness he can tell the pale hair is metallic silver, and there’s a hell of a bruise blooming on his forehead. Duck’s never seen anyone quite like him, and if their survival didn’t depend on his concentration, he’d spend the next hour studying him.
“Damn, got banged up in the crash huh.”
“Yes.” The man gingerly touches the bruise, sighs, “It’s my own fault for being careless.”
“Don’t be too hard on yourself, nearly spun out on the way to get you from the damn black ice.”
“I wish I could say that was the sole cause, but I was also asleep.”
Duck bites back the urge to scold him; he wants him to be comfortable around him and besides, even if Duck is having a crappy night, this guy is having an even worse one.
“Wouldn’t be the first person who thought they could make it one more town before stoppin for the night and was wrong.”
“True. It’s just that, ah, I’ve been driving three days straight without sleep.”
“Jesus Christ, you on the lamb or somethin?”
In his periphery, he swears the taller man flinches.
“No. Just having bad luck with a chaser of poor choices.”
“Gotcha.” Duck drums on the wheel, “so, uh, Mr. Wilde, what do you do when you ain’t stuck in the snow?”
“I draw. And Indrid is fine…” he peers awkwardly at Duck’s name tag, “Duck.”
“It’s a nickname.”
“Ah. Are you a mechanic as well as a driver?”
“Yep. Do it part-time when I’m not workin at the national forest. Friend of mine, Ned, runs the garage attached to the Cryptonomica.”
“I recall seeing that when I drove through. Quite the Jacks of all trades, you two,”
“Most of Kepler’s got more’n one job. It’s the kind of place that’s always losin fundin or people, just barely stayin afloat.”
“One sympathizes. Do you like your jobs?”
“Trained in forestry, so it’s always what I’ve wanted to do. The mechanic stuff,” Duck shrugs, “nice workin with my hands and beein able to help folks out. And I ain’t half bad at it.”
“I certainly appreciate your efforts. I--wait, hold on, I’m sorry but I need to…” he turns up the radio, playing what Duck assumed was Santa Baby from the melody.
“He is saying ‘buddy.’ What in the world? Why would you change it?”
“Can’t have the fella in the red velvet suit thinkin you’re gay.” Duck jokes.
“Heaven forbid.” Indrid smiles, and Duck likes the expression so much he decides to see if he can get him to do it again.
“You wanna hear a slightly inappropriate joke?”
“Absolutely.”
“How come Santa don’t have any kids?”
“How come?”
“Because he only comes once a year and it’s down a chimney.”
There’s a beat and then Indrid guffaws, covering his face with his hands as his whole body shakes with amusement, “that was horrible, do you have any more?”
Thank god he’s got a wealth of bad jokes tucked in his brain. When he exhausts those he and Indrid trade brainteasers, stopping now and then to talk about their lives. The taller man asks Duck about his jobs, about the woods, and the town, and offers a few anecdotes in exchange. Duck senses they’re about they’re set in a time in his life that’s further away than Indrid would like.
Indrid also readily shares the snacks from his small backpack. Duck eats what he can while still safely piloting the car. Then nearly takes them across the yellow line when Indrid unwraps a Starburst with his tongue, and prays the man will stay in Kepler long enough for Duck to take him to dinner.
-------------------------------------
Given he was expecting a painfully awkward trip at best, Duck’s friendliness is a welcome surprise. Now that they’ve been stuck in the car together for close to two hours, Indrid is confident saying this is most fun he’s had talking to someone in a long time, even before things went all to hell.
It helps that Duck is the picture you’d get if you googled “Indrid Cold’s type”; sturdy, handsome in an unassuming way, undoubtedly pleasant to cuddle, with muscles that Indrid is positive could hold him up against a wall for at least a few minutes. In another life, one that’s so far away he fears he imagined it, he’d wait until they were done with the business portion of this evening, then slip Duck a card with his name in silver letters and his hotel room number on the back. The man is so genuine in his kindness too, Indrid feeling safer in the dark with him than he’s felt in years.
Which makes him feel even worse about what he’s going to do.
“Not too far now.” Duck turns the windshield wipers up a notch, “thank fuck for that.”
Indrid curls forward, holding his stomach, “I, ah, I really hate to say this, but I’m afraid my gas station lunch is coming back up.”
“Shit, okay, lemme pull over.” Duck guides the truck onto the side of the road, “do what you gotta do.”
His hands are on his lap, keys still dangling from the ignition. Indrid lunges over, grabbing them and trying to shove Duck into the door in one go. The mechanic is too fast, yanking the keys to his chest.
“What the fuck man!?”
“I’m so sorry about this!”
“Then fuckin stop!” Duck kicks, misses, and Indrid knees him in the stomach as gently as he can.
“I can’t, I need the truck.”
“Are you fuckin car-jackin me right now?”
“It’s not personal.” He gets the keys away, only for the world to flip ninety degrees as Duck tackles him backwards.
“It sure feels like it is!”
Indrid hoped that his survival instincts would kick in hard enough to make up for the exhaustion and that coupled with the element of surprise would bring him success. Instead, his limbs have no power behind them, and all he can do is curse when the driver flips him onto his stomach, trapping his hands behind his back and pinning him with his body weight.
“Fuck.” It’s a pathetic noise for a pathetic man.
“Explain. Now.” Duck growls.
“I, I, you were right when asked if I was on the lamb.”
“....fuckin what?”
“It was a set up, and I finally, finally got free, and, and I will not go back, I can’t, but if I’m out a car I need a replacement and-”
“And you almost stole a truck that’s got a goddamn tracker in it.”
“Oh.” He presses his face to the seat in shame.
“Somethin tells me you ain’t a seasoned crook.”
“I’m not a criminal at all! I have no idea what I’m doing. I was just going to drive and drive until I hit the coast, I hadn’t even decided what to do after. I, I’m sorry, I waited until we got close to town so you wouldn’t be too far away to walk home safely. I, ah, I wasn’t prepared for having to do this to someone I like.”
Duck shifts above him, mutters, “what the fuck do I do now” to himself, and tightens his hold on Indrid’s wrists.
Indrid whimpers, realizing with horror that his body responded to the mechanics of the fight but not it’s context.
Duck freezes at the noise, and when Indrid hazards a peek the mechanic is staring down in disbelief.
“Are you fuckin hard from this?”
There’s no use in lying, he’s faced worse humiliation than this, “Some. Not on purpose. I, ah, I enjoy rough treatment.”
Duck’s face fills with bitter amusement, “And I like givin it. But not to fellas who nearly steal my truck. Fuckin figures the first guy to flirt with me is doin it for some other reason.”
“That’s not true, my plan involved no flirting.” Indrid huffs, “I was flirting because I think you’re handsome.”
More pressure on his back as Duck leans down to whisper in his ear, grinding against his ass, “Yeah? Were you hopin I’d fuck you in here? Or over the hood when we got back?”
“Maybe.” He manages a smirk.
“Hopin I’ll fuck you now?”
Indrid nods, but Duck doesn’t notice. The mechanic sits all the way back, releasing his hands, “too damn bad, because unlike you, I only take things with permission.”
“C-consider it granted.”
The hand finds his back again, but instead of shoving or grabbing it strokes up and down, “Indrid, I’m serious. I ain’t doin anythin if the only reason you’re offerin is because you think I’ll hurt you if you don’t.”
“I’m not. I want this, Duck, I want to be with you.” He’s going back to jail one way or another after this, unwilling to consider the thought of hurting Duck to get the keys. He’d rather go back with one happy memory and a few minutes of fun freshly stored in his mind.
There’s silence, Duck’s hand still as he thinks. Then it comes down hard on Indrid’s ass, “Okay sugar, happy to oblige you. Besides, seems to me you owe me an apology for that sorry excuse for a car theft.”
Indrid moans loudly when Duck hauls onto his elbows and knees, though it’s the pet name that hits deeper than any of the much-welcome pain. The waistband of his dollar store sweatpants hits his thighs, there’s a pop of something plastic, and then a slick finger is teasing between his asscheeks.
“Vaseline. Great for keepin your skin from cracking in the cold.”
The finger disappears and he whines, pushing his ass back and getting it slapped so hard he yelps.
“Nice try. But this ain’t for you, it’s for me. Don’t got a condom and only got a tiny bit of this left and it ain’t enough to fuck you full on.”
“It’s alright, I like the pain, you could use spit or-”
“Nope” another slap, “that turns into the bad kinda pain real quick. Now open your fuckin legs.”
Indrid does so, gasps happily when Duck slides his lubed-up cock between his thighs.
“Close ‘em and keep ‘em closed. Good, ohfuckyeah that’s good.” The thrusts are already fast, Ducks hands holding his hips in place, “fuck, tell you what sugar, you may be a shitty crook but you’re a damn good lay.”
“Yes.” Indrid moans, scrabbling for a hold on the upholstery.
“Shit, you do like it rough. Like it when I talk like that?” One hand comes down, petting Indrid’s head and brushing his hair away from where it’s stuck over his eyes.
“So much, Duck, please, please, more, I want more AHgod!” Tears slip past his glasses as Duck hits the right side of his ass over and over again. He’s been treated like a criminal mastermind, made miserable because of it, so being nothing more than an eager piece of ass is a welcome change.
“Then I oughta tell you this is what you get for tryin to get one over on me. Think you can throw my ass out in the cold? Gonna turn yours so red you won’t be able to sit for a week.”
He’s so hard it isn’t even funny, and beneath the wonderful cycle of pain-relief-pain-relief his mind chants safesafesafesafe.
“Fuck, Indrid, I’m so fuckin lucky you tried that stunt on me, can’t wait to cum all over that cute little ass, ohyeah, fuck, fuckyeah.” He pulls out, cum spurting onto Indrid’s ass and legs and Indrid hears his own voice saying “thank you” as he does.
As he’s contemplating what form of begging will earn him an orgasm, he’s flipped onto his back, one calloused hand pressing him down by the shoulder while the other jerks him off. He squeaks and squirms, one palm thwacking into the door as his right leg catches the steering wheel.
“Sensitive, sugar?”
“Yes.”
“Shoulda thought of that before you bent over for me.”
“TechnicallyAH, you, you’re the one who bent me over.”
Duck jerks him extra hard in reply, grinning. The sight of him is just the right balance of menacing and protective that Indrid only needs two more bucks of his hips before he’s cumming. The mechanic works him through it, squeezing him roughly just to hear him whimper (Indrid’s certain of it).
He sits back and starts putting his clothes in order as Indrid lays there, panting from exertion and the weight of reality on his chest.
“I don’t suppose you have something I can, ah, wipe off with before you take me to the station?” He asks softly.
“I’m not taking you to the police, Indrid.”
“What? Why?” He bolts up, his mind screaming that he shouldn’t ask too many questions lest it make Duck change his mind.
“I’m not sure what kinda guy fucks someone and then hands them over to the cops, but I’m damn sure I don’t wanna be one.”
“You’d do that without even knowing the full truth?”
“Wouldn’t mind if you told me.” Duck starts the car, adds “seatbelt” as he pulls back onto the road.
Indrid gets his pants up and buckles in, huddling in on himself, “As you probably guessed, my name isn’t Wilde. It’s Indrid Cold. Wilde was the man I stole that car from, who also had a very nice AAA plan it seems. I am, or was, an architect. Quite talented, if I do say so myself. And many other people said so, once upon a time. My firm got a contract with a certain large city to design and help build a bridge. I was head of design, and I was certain this would be the project that made my name. It did. Just not how I hoped.”
Duck slows down as they reach the edge of Kepler.
“Have you ever heard of the Silverlake Bridge?”
“Ain’t that the one that collapsed a few years agooh, oh shit was that your bridge?”
“Yes. Halfway through the project, I became concerned that certain elements of the design would not be as stable as they needed to be and might collapse without warning. The higher ups said it would require a larger budget to do the new, far safer design, but gave me the go ahead to finish my proposal of the securer model. They accepted that design, and I thought that was the end of it. Turns out, they funneled the money needed for the better bridge into their own pockets, both my bosses and the representatives from the city. Unbeknownst to me, they built the weaker bridge. When it collapsed I” he takes a deep breath, the memories surfacing in a tidal wave, “I was shocked, and prepared to accept responsibility, as I could not understand how the design failed. It was only when the investigation revealed how it failed that I understood my warnings had been ignored and I was being set up as a fall guy. Not only for the collapse, but for the missing funds, my bosses swearing up one side and down the other that they’d given the money to me to manage. They’d had this planned for months, and so had built our communication in such a way that I had no proof the money hadn’t come to me. Thus I was blamed, tried, and convicted, and in the minds of many I am responsible for the death of 67 people.”
The engine shuts off and he looks up to see them in an auto garage. Duck is turned to him, face so sad and sympathetic that Indrid could almost believe..
“You think I’m telling the truth.”
“I know you are. Not sure how, but even though I ain’t much of a liar myself, I can usually tell when someone is bullshittin me.”
“I don’t want to go back to prison.”
“You won’t.”
“Duck I, I can’t ask you to hide me, that could put you in danger of arrest.”
“There’s all of four cops in Kepler, and I’d bet my life no one here could pick you out of a line-up as a ‘disgraced architect Indrid Cold.’ And if we need a cover story, Ned’s got a knack for ‘em.”
“We?”
Duck cups his cheek and Indrid leans into it, “You and me. Indrid, I think fate is a load of bullshit, but I can’t shake the feelin me pickin you up tonight was meant to be. Lemme help you, please.”
Indrid sets his hand on Duck’s own, “Okay. Ah, where do I stay? I have fifty dollars left.”
“Could stay with me if you want. No strings attached.”
“Is that your way of letting me down gently?”
“My way of saying you don’t gotta fuck me to have a place to live. If you wanna fuck me just because, say the word and I’ll rail you into next week.”
“I’d like both those things so very much. Though right now all I want is to sleep.”
Duck leans forward, kissing him so chastely that the following lovebite is all the more thrilling.
“In that case, sugar, let’s get you home.”
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The Love Interest
In 2017, Taft Studios hired a new screenwriter for their popular, and long-running show, The Banana Splits. Her name was Sammie Satterlee, and ever since they recruited her on the staff, she impressed the audience with her diversed setting scenarios.
Some new episodes took up morals that are rarely explored among children, and needed to be talked about more. The Sour Grape girls were given more personalities, rather than being reduced to cute, sassy dolls. She made Bingo and Drooper explicitly POC coded, so that minority children can see themselves in their favorite characters, even allowing some POC to guest star on the show. Bingo spoke Spanish occasionally, and Drooper celebrated Kwanzaa for a holiday themed episode. Stevie was also given a decent dose of character development.
Then, at that year, 2018, Sammie was ready to take on a new challenge: Introduce an LGBTQ+ character. Around this generation, a lot of children's media has been accepting of queer themes. The whole purpose was to help kids acknowledge that queer romance is just the same as the typical heterosexual romance. There is nothing inherently sexual about it.
Plus, Sammie happened to be queer herself. She grew up loving The Banana Splits throughout her childhood, and is still a fan to this day. She also grew up around a lot of homophobia at that time. Projecting sexualities/trans identities onto characters is a method of feeling more accepting, more valid. The same method queer kids on the internet use "headcanons" for. Queer children deserve representation. Sesame Street won't do it, so The Banana Splits might as well.
What better way to have one of the Bananas come out than giving them a male love interest? But, which Banana shall have a love interest? Fleegle seems too independent for a lover, regardless of what gender. Bingo prefers pranks and adventure over romance. And Snorky, even though as old as his fellow band mates, bears childlike innocence, so he's not ready for an adult love interest. The only option left was Drooper.
Yes, Drooper will work, she thought. The poor lion is considered the loser of the bunch. What if he had a sweet darling that would tell him how valid he is? Drooper's so clumsy, he's always falling down. Now, he needs someone to catch him and pick him back up on his feet. Sammie then started to sketch out her ideas.
That's when she conjured up Tux the snow leopard! Tux was short for Tucker, also defining his wardrobe, which was a tuxedo. The reason she chose a snow leopard was due to their majestic appearance, and she wanted Tux to come out as sort of a romantic gentleman. Also, because he should be a feline like Drooper. She drew out a reference concept of Tux, along with additional sketches of him and Drooper acting lovey-dovey with each other, and written a bio.
Tux was presented as a muscled man, a contrast opposite to Drooper's skinny frame. This snow leopard was purposely intended to be the hero to Drooper's damsel in distress. He sure is a handsome fella, but he's pretty dumb as well. That didn't matter. He's perfect for Drooper. Tux would be somewhat special to Drooper, like he understands him, he cherishes him, and he's willing to take a punch in the face for him.
After giving the references to Karl, and a bit of debate, the engineer decided to take a shot at it. Reading through Tux's biography, his personality and characteristics had quite interest Karl. This snow leopard certainly didn't possess the same energy as his other boys. Fleegle was the intellectual leader, Bingo was fun and energetic, Drooper was the butt of bad luck, and Snorky was the baby of the group. Tux was different. It would be quite complicated for a stoic machine to act out all these actions. Unless...
What if he gave this animatronic fully functional emotions? Karl always wanted to try something new. A robot with emotions would probably be his greatest achievement yet. No other engineer has dared to try it out. Not only will the idea be impressive, but his feelings would be very convincing.
After almost a month, Tux was completed. Although he matched his reference drawing perfectly, he appeared to be seven feet tall, instead of being two inches shorter than Drooper. Speaking of Drooper, not only were emotions installed into his databanks, but he was also programmed to fall in love with no one but said lion.
Karl decided to showcase Tux to Sammie. He then activated the mechanical snow leopard. It took some time for Tux to get into motion, but as soon as he saw those humans in sight, he stepped back nervously. He touched around at himself for a moment, and scanned his surroundings. He was now alive, and he wasn't sure how he felt about this. The animatronic walked around the room, picking up items at random. He went back to Sammie and spoke for the first time.
"Hello. I'm... I'm..."
Karl answered for him.
"Tux."
"I'm Tux. Pleasure to meet you. ...I think. Say, could you tell me where am I? What is going on? What is my objective?"
Just as Sammie could say anything, the Splits had entered the room. Tux turned his attention towards them by instinct. The very sight of Drooper had already triggered him into love mode. The feeling of seeing the lion was undescribable to him, but since it's in his programming, he knew how to act. He stared at the lion for awhile, then ran over to him. Tux took his paw into his.
"Hello. I am Tux. Pardon me if this sounds so sudden, but, I love you."
The animatronic kissed Drooper's hand, even though he just gapped his mouth open a bit and pressed it against the paw.
"Do you love me?"
Drooper was confused by this abrupt gesture, and had no opinion about it due to his lack of emotions. Still, he responded anyways.
"I love you too, Tux! I love all my friends!"
Tux was quite offended, having to be considered a "friend." Sammie decided to clear things up for the lion animatronic.
"Uh, Drooper, this is Tux. He is your new boyfriend. You know, like, a lover. As in you two are in love. Or at least, pretend to be, for the show."
A new boyfriend? Drooper doesn't remember agreeing to that. He just met the snow leopard, and all of a sudden, they're lovers? The lion isn't sure how he feels about that, especially since he doesn't return the snow leopard's attraction. Then again, Tux is a pretty nice guy. And it's not like they're forcing him to love him back. After all, she did say he could pretend for the show. Since the Splits aren't on the air right now, they might as well just be friends. Drooper shook his hand and greeted the new recruit.
"Very nice meetin' ya, Tux! I'm Drooper! This is Fleegle, Bingo, and Snorky! Welcome to The Banana Splits! Enjoy your stay, friend!"
He still deemed Tux as a "friend." That's not what Tux wanted. He didn't just come alive, fall in love instantly, only for it to turn out to be one-sided. Tux figured, he will get this lion to love him back, even if it kills him.
And so, for the last four days, Tux wasn't ready to be onscreen, so that gave him enough time to win Drooper's affection. The snow leopard had snuck into Rebecca's computer to find information on how to woo a person. Then he'd capture that info into his system.
Tux tried presenting Drooper with a flower (one of the props). He was flattered, took the flower, and patted Tux on the head. But walked away afterwards.
He tried serenading a romantic song, which was performed by the Splits in another era. 🎵I enjoy being a boy, in love with youuuuuuuuuu.🎶 Once again, Drooper was flattered, and applauded his performance, but still, walked away.
Next, he tried the extreme. Tux grabbed Drooper, dipped him, and planted his mouth onto his, giving him a kiss. That only resulted in Drooper pushing him so hard, he knocks him down on his bum.
No matter what technique he tried, his attempts all failed. And Drooper showed no signs of loving him back. Today was scheduled for Tux to make his physical appearance. But before he's ready to be on the show, he discussed his issue with Karl.
"My lover... ...doesn't love me. What have I done wrong?"
Karl knew exactly what the problem was. It's not what Tux has done, but how Drooper feels. The lion animatronic was built to be emotionless, so it's impossible for him to accept a handsome man's gesture. Maybe Karl can fix that.
"Settle down, my boy. You'll get what you want. I promise."
He then called Drooper over for a tune up. The only way for the two's feelings to be mutual is to install the lion with the same features programmed into Tux's databanks. The snow leopard held his hands together tightly. Soon, he and Drooper will be bond together at last. Together, forever. He'll have him close to him. They'll hold hands. The two will spend their entire lives as one until they rust. Karl then motioned that he had the notion of giving the other Splits emotions as well, so that they can embrace Tux like a family member. He wanted to make his greatest achievement feel at home.
“Yeah yeah sure. Now hurry up with the process!”
Suddenly, Rebecca entered the workshop, announcing that the whole "LGBTQ+ representation" project was officially canceled.
While the news of The Banana Splits having an LGBTQ+ character on their show received largely positive from the queer community, they've also gained negative, violent feedback from those who were against it. They were being accused of "attempting to encourage children into sexual acts," and called out for spreading "leftist SJW propaganda."
It gets much worse. Straight parents set up a campaign to boycott the show. Stevie threatened to quit because he refuses to work around a "cybernetic f@gg3t." And Andy, the network executive, blackmailed that he would pull the plug on their show if they let this "gay shit" slip onto TV. Sammie was fired, and the whole assignment was history.
Karl stopped what he was doing, leaving Tux confused.
"Aren't you gonna-"
"I'm afraid there's no reason to anymore, my boy."
"But, Karl- Drooper- You said I could have what I want! YOU PROMISED!"
“I wish I could keep it, but I don't think I have a choice. I'm sorry."
"I don't believe it. How could you be SO SELFISH?! HAVE YOU EVER THOUGHT ABOUT HOW I FEEL?! PLUG HIM BACK IN, RIGHT NOW!"
“I can't-"
"ALL I WANT IS MY KITTEN TO LOVE ME! DOESN'T ANYBODY CARE?!!"
The snow leopard threw a big tantrum. A single stomp on the ground made the floor shake. Then, he shoved items off of counters, and smashed stuff, while screaming at the top of his voice. He was absolutely terrifying at that moment. Tux turned to Rebecca, thinking it was all her fault. She tried to tell him to stand down, but he was too stubborn. He grabbed her by the neck, and pressed her against the wall. With Tux's back turned away, that gave Karl the opportunity to shut him down. Tux let go of Rebecca, and fell over unconscious.
Poor Tux. Maybe giving him emotions was a bad idea. As it turns out, he's not mature enough to know how to handle them, which makes him too unstabled. After that traumatized experience, Rebecca demanded that Karl should get rid of him this instant.
After she left, the three other aninatronics entered the workshop. Karl stared down at Tux for a minute. The snow leopard animatronic didn't mean to cause any harm. He's just a little faulty, with his ardent coding and all. Karl never worked out how he would have Tux cope with his emotions. The engineer couldn't bring himself to throwing out what he thought was gonna be his greatest achievement yet, so he asked his four to dispose of Tux for him. Karl then left the workshop to see if he could calm Rebecca down.
Four of the Splits gazed upon the now deactivated animatronic. They, including Drooper, felt a bit sorry for him. Why put him to waste? There's still some potential in him. The sad case just wanted, and needed, some love like they have had. A new Banana Splits member is still a member. Besides, he was much nicer to them than Stevie.
"What are we gonna do with him?"
So, rather than dragging his metal carcass to the dumpster, they all agreed to hide his body, behind a couple of boxes and bins in the corner. Perhaps he will make himself useful. Someday.
#The one who turned a banana cherry red [Tux]#Dear sweet kitten [Drooper]#Lover cats [Tux and Drooper]#Bleeding heart [Horrorverse]#Homophobia tw
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Polyhex Wars, Book 1 Part 2: The Timeline for the Robots Being Gay Goes Back Further Than I Thought
Ratchet wakes up from that whole, “mystical passing out” thing to find himself strapped to a table with his head all poked into with wires. Optimus and Prowl are also being subjected to this treatment, but they’re not awake yet.
I guess we all have that one character we just latch onto, don’t we?
Chromedome was there when all three of these guys collapsed, and went to go get help. Ratchet explains that there was black fire and breaking glass and it was all like some god-awful acid trip.
No kidding, doc.
Ratchet seems to think that all that actually happened, but it turns out that it was all in their heads, much like everything else that they’d seen. Chromedome just saw them drop with a flash of light.
Optimus wakes up, and First Aid explains that their mental trips into Limbo are coming closer and closer together, and becoming more violent as a result. There’s a good chance that the next time they have an attack, they’ll be sharing a dreamscape.
Prowl hasn’t woken up. Optimus is worried that he’s stuck in Limbo, and demands that they be put back under to guide him back to the land of the living. First Aid has his reservations, but what is he gonna do, argue with the space pope? Optimus and Ratchet are sent back in with the power of mind-transfer.
Let’s take a quick look at some Chromedome canon before we move on to the next chunk of story, because I want to try and get a feel for why Roberts seems to like him so much.
In the Marvel comics, Chromedome was kind of a reclusive computer nerd, who very much disliked the fact that all his programming skills were only being applied to the war effort as opposed to literally anything else. When Fortress Maximus decided to up and leave, he went along gladly. He ended up getting paired with a very outgoing, vain Nebulan partner named Stylor when the whole Headmaster thing happened. They had their differences, but ultimately were brought together by the common goal of kicking Decepticon ass for the greater good. Comic Chromedome is a relatively nice guy, if a bit cowardly- his final entry in the series was heading for the hills when Unicron showed up, but honestly I can’t really fault him for that.
And then there’s the Headmasters anime. Yeah, Chromedome was an anime protagonist back in the 90’s. Anime Chromedome is a completely different entity than his comic counterpart. His whole thing is that he wants revenge for the murder of his friends at the hands of Sixshot. He’s also a Headmaster- no shit- but it works a little differently, in that he’s the only one involved with the process. Chromedome himself IS the head, and the big body he plugs into is just this sort of inert mecha that he pilots when he wants to be able to reach the higher shelves at the supermarket.
Anime Chromedome is the second-in-command to Fortress Maximus, and he’s a bit of a jackass at times, but he seems to have his heart in the right place. You know, when he isn’t busy beating Decepticons to death. Anime Chromedome goes hard.
Getting back to the story, we return to the scene we left at the end of Part One, with the 40 Autobots having been caught in a trap in Darkmount.
Well that lasted all of five minutes. Poor Grandpa.
This starts a chain reaction, and it isn’t long before all the Autobots are throwing punches. Blaster goes full cowl, taking four guys on at once, and potentially kneeing someone in the nuts so hard they flies up into the air and are promptly exploded by gunfire. Blaster throws a gun to Sights, who is a sniper, and then is right back in the center of the fracas.
Sights is a sniper here, but it looks like the only Sights in Transformers canon is a bird who can turn into a fusion cannon. They probably aren’t the same character, unless there’s something I don’t know about birds.
Sights hauls himself up to a ledge using a grappling hook, and starts picking off Decepticons. Things seem to be turning around for the Autobots at this point, because Sights is the best.
Sights is what some might call a Mary Sue- he’s the best at sniping, rivaling Optimus Prime himself with his accuracy, everyone seems to know him, and he singlehandedly has turned the tide of this fight. As the Autobots escape, he manages to explode a key piece of Decepticon equipment, killing over a dozen enemy troops.
This is an earlier work, if you couldn’t already tell.
We do see some neat transitions in the writing, though.
Ratchet and Optimus have entered Limbo, and are feeling a little manic about the whole thing, especially since the space is just filled with corpses from the Time Wars. Like, it’s a carpet of dead bodies.
Roberts was all about that edge from the get-go, huh?
The two robots start walking, looking for Prowl.
Over with Red Alert on the Celestial, he’s not really feeling the vibe on this spacecraft. Neither is Hot Shot, but neither of them can really pinpoint why exactly that is. Sideswipe points out that Getaway doesn’t have his Nebulan partner with him- for this particular story, we’re going with the take on Getaway as a Powermaster, which means he has a smaller person who plugs into his body to act as a battery, kind of like a reverse parasite.
Comic books are weird.
Toy gimmicks are also weird.
This cues in the Autobots that things might not be on the up and up here. You know, that and the whole “Witterquick” thing. The boys load their weapons, but keep them concealed as they approach not-Blaster, who’s beginning to worry that he’s been caught after all this time. He must have sort flavor of social anxiety, because he’s kept his cool over the video chat for the last few weeks, but the moment Red Alert enters the room, he blows his cover and orders the Decepticons to attack.
Back at Darkmount, it seems we’ve lost a few people, as the count has gone from 40 to 29. The boys are running through the halls, completely clueless as to where to go in order to escape.
Don’t be shocked by the language, this is G1 Silverbolt, not the one who fucks is a complete gentleman to a spider.
I’m still convinced that this Courier guy is evil. You should be tossing him out the window, not looking to him for help.
The Decepticons are gaining. Hound, exasperated, asks as nicely as he can for Silverbolt to try and wake Courier up as they attempt to keep the distance between factions as wide as they can. Laser fire quickly becomes involved, and Swerve and Bumblebee go from the back of the pack to the front. Little fellas can move when they want to.
While Sights does another cool thing with some guns he stole, Courier wakes up and says- with some trouble, since he’s just woken up and still bleeding from that leg wound- that they should jump into the sewers to escape.
That’s all well and good, but if they intend on doing such a thing, they’ll need to put a bit more distance between themselves and their assailants. Everyone starts shooting at the ceiling, attempting to bring it crashing down. Everyone except Sights. No, instead Sights goes on picking off any Decepticon who gets too close for comfort, until they manage to bring the house down.
The strong, silent type, Sights is. Tall, dark, and handsome, too, most likely.
Back in Limbo, Ratchet’s starting to crack.
As if on cue, the ground starts to crack, revealing lava of all things, and the whole scene turns into Dante’s Inferno-flavored Hell. Yeah, proper noun Hell. Optimus and Ratchet are exploded by contact with a downpour of acid rain, then their bodies reconstituted, only to be burned to crispies by the lava. When they wake up from that, they find themselves stuck on a spinning silver plate in the sky, where they have an excellent view of where Prowl’s gotten to- he’s stranded on an asteroid with a big, scary Decepticon, who’s about to complete wreck his shit.
You know, the snark has always been there in Roberts’ writing, but it didn’t really hit its stride until after this piece of work.
Meanwhile, in the sewers, our Autobots aren’t doing so hot. Courier’s probably going to die if they don’t get him medical attention soon. I guess they just didn’t have any sort of medic on the Celestial when it was overtaken, which seems like a massive oversight. Or maybe they’re dead.
We don’t have time to worry about the hiring practices of the Autobots right now though, because a few Decepticons just arrived on the scene.
Well, there goes the token girl character.
Seems like nobody told these ‘Cons to not hit their deep cover operative. There goes several thousand years of Autobot secrets, dumbasses. Soundwave’s going to be so pissed.
The Autobots quickly fall into formation and start defending themselves. Turns out Rev-Tone’s on the scene.
Hi Rev-Tone!
Someone gets shot and proceeds to explode, which causes enough chaos for a Decepticon to load up a missile launcher without being noticed and fire it into the crowd.
Things are looking hopeless, so that means it’s time for Sights to make his Heroic Sacrifice™. Hound begs him to stay, because he can’t bear to lose anyone else.
Unfortunately, the Hound/Sights coffeeshop AU slowburn fit written by Rewind will have to have a fix-it fic tag, because Sights is almost immediately and literally ripped apart by a smattering of Decepticons. Knowing his time is running out, he busts out the big guns.
Oh my god he’s got fucking laser vision.
That isn’t quite enough though, so he initiates self-destruct, thereby saving his fellow Autobots and dying a hero.
You know, if you stack Sights on top of what was left of Quark after the interrogation scene, you make a whole robot. Worst. Duobot. Ever.
Not to worry though, because Wheeljack’s taken the opportunity to be all weird and cryptic, and insinuates that they potentially COULD bring Sights back from the dead. Because of course he can.
We don’t get to find out how that magic’s going to happen though, because it’s time to check in on Optimus and Ratchet.
Things aren’t going great. They crashed the disk, and it turns out that the giant Decepticon threatening Prowl and throwing body parts at him is Galvatron. Optimus leaps into action, attempting to use his magnetic repellence on the enemy.
I guess that’s a thing he has.
It works, but it’s taking a lot out of Optimus, so they need to figure something else out fast. Optimus, ever light on his mental feet, surges the power so that Galvatron explodes. Ratchet goes over to Prowl to see what his deal is, and it’s looking like he’s going to need brain surgery.
“Now back the hell up, Optimus, you’re breathing contaminates all over Prowl’s exposed brain.”
Back on Cybertron, it turns out that things might just be okay after all, as Hound and company have stumbled across the lost city of Subterrainia.
Subterrainia did not exist in Transformers canon at the time of this writing, but it would in 2012, when Roberts used his immense power as a hired writer for the franchise to make it so.
Now that they’re in a place that has medical equipment, they can heal their wounded and indulge in a little lore. Trasher provides us with the backstory of this lost city.
Long before the War, Transformers lived on the surface of Cybertron. Then, one day, someone said, what if we didn’t do that? Then they built Subterrainia and lived there instead. Then the War happened and people sort of just forgot that it was there. The end.
That’s literally it.
After that riveting explanation, we check back in with Optimus, who I suppose forgot to put on his patience hat this morning, as he asks Ratchet to hurry up with the life-saving field surgery he’s currently in the middle of. Ratchet calls him out on it, as he should, and Optimus apologizes, going back to worrying about his troops outside of Limbo.
Over on the Celestial, Red Alert’s just had his arm shot off, and there’s a continuity error running amok.
You are supposed to be back at base, mister!
The Autobots are getting their asses kicked, and it’s not hard to see why- a lot of the Decepticons on this spacecraft are heavy hitters. Starscream’s here, the entire Combaticon team, it’s wild.
Then Starscream calls for escape plan 3 to take place, and they just… leave. It’s strange, and it’s sudden, and the Autobots can’t help but agree. Red Alert decides to see what’s on the computer to try and figure out what they’re planning, and ends up setting off the countdown for a bomb. Slapdash yells at him for being an idiot.
Back down in the City of the Mole People, Getaway’s come back from checking out the place, and informs Hound that it’s completely abandoned. He theorizes that the Decepticons killed everyone who lived here, an will probably come looking for them sooner rather than later. That’s all fine though, because Courier’s back and better than ever.
I still don’t trust him.
He says he knows how to get out of Subterrainia- which only chalks up more points against him being a true Autobot- but hold on! What about Sights?
Sights just got Goldbugged. It’s Ammo now.
Roberts will never let a pair of robot titties go unnoticed. I can’t believe that Wheeljack, with the limited time they had, would go and make Ammo this attractive, and then have the audacity to show him off with a dramatic reveal. It was completely unnecessary, but here we are, staring at Ammo’s strong arms and thighs, wishing to be held by Hotbot 9000 over here.
Hound is all about this overhaul. Look at him, getting all flustered.
Ammo as character is present in the IDW run of the comics, but in name only. They are very different creatures, much like the different iterations of Quark. Roberts is very into recycling, and here is no exception.
After Ammo’s debut, the narrative checks in on Autobot City, where things aren’t nearly as sexy; Starscream made a beeline for the place the moment they left the Celestial, and they’re wrecking shop. He’s doing this without orders to do so, by the way. This is just how Starscream wants his Monday to go, I guess. It’s looking pretty grim for the Autobots, and Optimus is still stuck in Limbo. Hopefully he gets back soon.
#transformers#jro#polyhex wars#book one#part two#maccadam#Hannzreads#text post#long post#prose writing
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Love Hurts Pt. 1
A/N: This is a Re-Edit of a collab I did with @beautifulseoulliar a while back. I am re-editing it to share with my lovelies that love BTS. This is a multi P.O.V. Each person will be mentioned before their part. This is Angsty AF, but I loved writing it. Hope you all enjoy, and get ready, It’s a Long Ass Ride!
Synopsis: Yoongi is a tattoo artist with a broken past. Namjoon is the innocent college boy that is about to learn a few lessons. Will Namjoon teach Yoongi that love is still possible, or will he regret ever meeting the mysterious daangerous Yoongi?
Characters: Tattoo Artist!Yoongi x College Student!Namjoon
Warnings: Angst, Smut, BDSM scenerios, broken Yoongi (is that a warning?), some fluff, and I’m sure there are others (please let me know if I need to add some)
Word Count: 4690
ccr to gif owner
(Namjoon)
They say that you should never wonder on a bad day how it could possibly get worse. I guess I should have remembered that as I was trudging home, cursing waking up this morning. My day had started off bad- a missed alarm, which meant I was forced to watch from a block away as the bus drove away without me. It had simply snowballed from there, with a missing paper-laying at home on my desk, right where I’d left it so I wouldn’t forget it- to detention during last period because of the forgotten paper. I mutter under my breath, wondering just how bad it was going to get.
And of course, the clouds just had to open up on me several blocks from home. I shiver as the wind whipped past me, seeming to try and push me back. If you’d told me at this point that wind gods were trying to keep me out in the elements for as long as they could, I wouldn’t have been surprised.
When I finally get home, I unlock the door, slightly amazed that the key doesn’t break in the lock, stepping inside and shutting the door behind me. The apartment is quiet, the only sound the slight tink of the sink dripping in the kitchen. I sigh, relieved that Hoseok isn’t home right now. As much as I love him-he is my best friend, after all, and has been since we were kids- I don’t feel like being bombarded with questions right now.
I toe off my shoes and drop my soaked bookbag by the door, padding across the living room and up the step to my bedroom door. Flinging it open, I enter my room, not bothering to shut the door as I strip out of my wet clothes. My phone I rescue from the back pocket of my jeans, blessing Hoseok for buying me a waterproof case for my birthday. I toss it onto my bed, then grab some pajama pants from the drawer and slip them on. Then, gathering up my wet things, I carry them to the bathroom and dump them into the washing machine. Grabbing a towel, I rub at my hair, finally just draping it over me as I head back to my room. I lay down on my bed, grabbing my phone as I sink down, making myself comfortable as I unlock the screen with my thumbprint.
1 new message.
My head starts to pound and I feel my stomach drop to my feet as I open the message and read it.
Joon, I’ve been thinking, and…
I can’t help the cry that spills from my lips as I bolt upright, throwing my phone as hard as I can across the room, where it hits my bookshelf and falls to the floor. I don’t know if I’ve broken it, but I couldn’t care less at the moment.
My day has now been crowned with a fucking cherry-my boyfriend just dumped me. Bastard. Now what am I supposed to do? I lay back down, everything inside me hurting, but I don’t cry, because that’s just not something I do. Instead, I plan to just lay here and slowly die.
(Hoseok)
Just as I'm walking in the door, I hear a loud crash coming from Joon's room as he screams.
What the hell is going on?
I scramble up the step, flinging his door open. He's lying on his bed, phone on the floor by the bookshelf, shattered screen and all.
I can tell by the look on his face, whatever was on that phone was not the best of news.
“Joonie? What's wrong?”
I walk over, sitting on the edge of his bed. I lay my hand on his shoulder, silently waiting on him to talk.
Namjoon's not much of the talking type, but sometimes, he and I can have some pretty decent conversations. We've know each other forever, having grown up in the same neighborhood. We've seen each other through some pretty fucked up things, but hey, what are friends for, right?
After several minutes of him mumbling and sighing dramatically, I was able to piece things together.
So, his jackass of a boyfriend, who I hated anyway, broke up with him. All of this, after a day from hell, that he swears will only get worse.
“Joon, my friend, what you need is a night out with me and some friends. We'll help you forget about today, what do you say? “
Pulling my best aegyo, I add with flair.
“Please, pwetty pwease? I Pwomise that you'll have fun!”
He finally agrees, only because he said my aegyo was on point.
I call up my girlfriend, then my boyfriend, and a few other mutual friends and plan a night out to remember. Little did I know, that tonight would change Namjoon forever.
(Namjoon)
I didn’t hear the sound of Hoseok coming in the front door of the apartment over the noise of my phone shattering, so when he comes bursting into my room, I wince. He glances at me, then across the room to where my phone lays in shards on the floor. His brows crease in worry.
“Joonie? What’s wrong?”
As usual, it’s hard for me to get the words out, especially when he sits down beside me, one hand resting comfortably on my shoulder. I bury my head in my hands and try to get it out. After a while, he seems to understand, both about the day I’ve been having and my boyfriend breaking up with me.
“Joon, my friend, what you need is a night out with me and some friends. We’ll help you forget about today, what do you say?”
I peek through my fingers, studying his face. He grins at me, pulling out his amazing aegyo, which always works on me.
“Please, pwetty pwease? I pwomise that you’ll have fun!”
I can’t deny that, so I nod reluctantly. Maybe a night out will be better for me than laying around the apartment. He whips out his phone when I agree, going out to the living room and closing my door halfway for privacy. He calls both his girlfriend and boyfriend, then a bunch of other friends, planning our night out. I half listen as I debate what to wear, deciding on something simple, since I’m not totally sure where we’re going or where we might wind up. I slip out of my pyjama pants and throw them on my bed for later. Then I slide into a pair of dark skinny jeans with large rips in the knees. A white t-shirt is next, and I complete it with a black-and-white striped jacket. I slip my tennis shoes on, run my fingers through my hair and observe myself in the mirror above my dresser. Not bad, but I decide to add one last thing, just because tonight I feel like I deserve it. I pull my eyeliner from my dresser drawer, where I keep it tucked safe under my socks. Lining my eyes makes them look even more amazingly cat-like than they normally do, and it’s the one vanity I allow myself. I know it gets me more looks than normal, which tonight I decide won’t be a bad thing. Smiling a little at my reflection, I turn to head out to the living room and join Hoseok.
(Hoseok)
“Alright Joonie, let's go!”
We head out the door, walking down the street to meet with our friends. Namjoon is quiet, still sulking after his shitty day. Once we are all together, we pick a club with a bass, planning on drinking our cares away and dancing with almost anything with two legs. We decided on Le Queen; even though it's a gay club by nature, everyone goes there.
The line was longer than the block, but we knew the owner. Shooting her a text, we were on the guest list before we got there. I really owe her a threesome with me and Chae. The music was blasting, sweaty bodies covering the dance floor like a crazed mass.
“Joon. Let's hit the bar first! First round’s my treat!”
The night was beginning, but I don't remember the end. Yeah for alcohol, right?
(Yoongi)
I really hate idiots. I hate dense idiots even more. I am trying to get the director in my company to see that I have to order the ink supply for the studio. My partner artists were running low, and they had clients coming thereat the end of the week. Our tattoo studio was about to open another shop and we still didn't have everything, which my director should know, but obviously didn't. Damn idiots.
After spending three hours arguing with said idiot, I was ready to explode. I was going to be late to Le Queen, having to do body art on one of the dancers before her performance. I also really hate being late, so when I got there, I headed straight for the bar to get my drink order placed while I was getting set up.
I was slightly, okay very, impatient, so I tried to ask the guy in front of me to hurry up. What preppy college kid would wear jeans and a jacket to a gay/Drag Queen club? Why would they be in this club anyway? Tapping him on the shoulder, I was about to say something when he turned around. The first thing that caught my attention was his eyes. I am a sucker for eyes, they are the window to the soul, and I always want to search someone's soul. It's a way to keep them from trying to get into mine.
His eyes were cat-like, accentuated by heavy lines of eyeliner, that made them more mysterious. He was younger than me by at least a year or maybe two, innocent looking face. Aish, poor fella, going to get himself hurt with that face. But I had to admit that he had a strangely alluring pull about him. His hair was a deep red, his bangs slightly over his eyes. His lips were a bit plump, but not too overly plump, just kind of pouty.
Going back to his eyes, I focused on them while I spoke.
“Hey, I need to place my order, can you hurry it up just a bit?”
He just kinda looked at me, turned back around and kept ordering. Little shit, if I wasn't in a hurry, I'd be busting your preppy little ass. Finally he stepped aside, and I placed my order, telling them I would be backstage, prepping for the body art.
Preppy kid had walked away, and I caught sight of something when I wound up behind him. The way his body moved when he walked, those long legs stretching with each step in not quite a strut, not not quite a sway, but a bit of sass and and I couldn't help but follow him until I absolutely had to walk backstage.
Wonder if he can dance as good as he looked. I would have to wait and find out later. Off to paint some naked body now.
(Namjoon)
Hoseok is his usual bouncy self when we leave the apartment, heading down the street to our usual meet-up spot with everyone he was able to call. As a group, we start our short walk to the club- Le Queen, a gay/drag queen club we’ve been to a hundred times before, and one of the few where I feel almost completely comfortable. Hoseok takes out his phone as the club comes into view, shooting a text to the owner, a woman he’s known a long time. I have my suspicions about their relationship, but I’d never bring it up. At any rate, the reply allows us to bypass the huge line, which I’m thankful beyond words for. I couldn’t imagine hell, but standing in line for hours after coming out to have fun might be comparable. As we entered the club, I breathed a sigh of relief. It was packed, as usual, which was usually a problem for me-I hated large crowds, but here it felt safe-there were way too many people for anyone to notice me. Hoseok turned to me, grinning, as most of our group splintered off, looking for a place to sit.
“Joon. Let’s hit the bar first! First round’s my treat!”
I nodded, giving him a small smile, and we headed for the bar. He managed to order a drink and down most of it while I was still considering. Suddenly, there was a tap on my shoulder, and I turned around, a little apprehensive for being touched. But what I came face-to-face with made my mouth go dry.
To say he was gorgeous would be a gross understatement. His blue hair was something I was instantly jealous of-I’d tried it once with my own hair, and Hoseok had called me a mermaid for a month-but it seemed to suit him. His eyes were cool behind round, wire-frame glasses, and his white shirt hung loose on his slender frame, the top two buttons undone, giving a glimpse of a tattoo across the left side of his chest. He was probably a year or two years older than me, and he had an air of danger. In short, he was like my every wet dream come to life. But something in me recognized the potential for violence in him, and it both attracted and scared me. This was the kind of man I tried to avoid-the kind that could steal my heart by barely trying and stomp it into dust. I’d seen his kind before, even had a close call a time or two, and those had been learning experiences. I knew better than to do anything other than get out of his way, as soon as possible.
“Hey, I need to place my order, can you hurry it up just a bit?”
His voice, smooth and dark as whiskey, had heat rising in my cheeks as I realized suddenly that I’d been staring. I blinked, forced myself to turn back to the bartender and choke out an order. At the same time, I was hyper-aware that he was still just behind me. I waited nervously for my drink, and when it was in my hand, I turned and walked away, without looking back. And, even though I knew it was a horrible idea, I couldn’t help but put a small sway in my walk, just a hint of sass. I giggled as I slid into the booth with my friends, keeping my head down until I couldn’t feel the heat of his eyes on me anymore.
(Hoseok)
“There’s the Joonie I know and love! What’s got you so tickled?”
Namjoon joined us at our booth, a wide grin on his face and a giggle. I don’t like seeing him where he can’t just be happy and enjoy himself. When he gets like that, I know the only thing to bring him back out of his shell is a night out. Maybe even find him a one-night stand to get him over the ex-jerkface. Did I mention I hate his ex-boyfriend? Anyway, we finished our rounds, then Chae and Jimin went to the dance floor. I love watching them together, in more ways than one, but I digress. So NAmjoon and I are left in the booth, his eyes looking around, maybe trying to find someone he wants to hook up with for the night. I just sit back and enjoy the atmosphere. Getting ready for the performance tonight. There are a couple of Queens dancing and I couldn’t wait to see it. I was also itching to get on the dance floor, so I grabbed his wrist and drug him to the center of the floor.
Man, can he dance too! Namjoon dancing, is like watching the sunrise after a storm, it enraptured me. He is fluid, graceful, and I would even admit, sensual. Everyone around us backed away, giving him room and just watched. He could get lost in it, and I was envious of him at times like these. When the music ended, he stood there breathless, and when he realized every eye was on him, he blushed and hung his head as he left the floor.
(Yoongi)
I started my painting, working on every minute detail she wanted me to add. It took my about an hour to finish her upper body, and I needed a break before finishing. I went to get another drink and stretch my limbs. I noticed people moving aside, their eyes trained on the center of the floor. I had to see what was so special that people weren’t dancing. I made my way to the upper level, pushing my way through some drunk people in my way.
When looked down, I couldn’t help but stare. The preppy college kid was dancing, and it was amazing. Those legs were… I can’t explain it. His body could hypnotize you with the way it moved to the beat. His muscles were taut under his jeans, his arms reaching out for miles. That red hair, already damp with sweat, hung over those soul catching eyes. When the music was over, he stood there like a statue, panting hard. Damn, I could make him pant harder. I shouldn’t be thinking like that, but I was. Funny thing was, when he noticed those people around him, he was suddenly shy. That’s not what happens to someone who can move like that. I had to tear my eyes away from him, but I was going to find him later.
I went back to finish my painting, but I just couldn’t keep my mind focused. Damn preppy college kid, you better not leave.
(Namjoon)
“There's the Joonie I know and love! What's got you so tickled?”
I flashed Hoseok a smile as I slid opposite of him, but refused to say anything. He squinted suspiciously at me, but didn't push. I looked around, eyeing potential one night stands, the alcohol and beat of the music making me feel a little more uninhibited. I caught him looking at me from the corner of my eye, and I turned to look at him. He tossed the remainder of his drink back, then slid out of the booth, grabbing my hand. I knew he wanted to dance, so I took another drink and followed him onto the dance floor.
The dance floor was the one place I felt completely at ease, no matter how many people were around. On the dance floor, with or without a partner, the world fell away and it was just me and the music. My body swayed and dipped, and my head fell back, eyes closed. But I could still sense Hoseok near me, and I effortlessly kept him as my anchor.
And then the heat of that stare was back. It was almost a physical touch, and it almost made me falter. I opened my eyes, looking around, body still moving, until I looked up to the balcony on the second level of the club, and the guy from the bar caught my attention. I felt a familiar spark ignite in my blood, and I knew without a doubt that if he made a move, I would be going home with him tonight.
(Hoseok)
After we finished dancing, Namjoon headed back to the booth and I stayed behind to dance with my lovers. I had seen enough, and I was ready to take them both home and have my own fun. Asking Namjoon if he was ready to head out, he told us that he was planning on staying a bit longer, that boy obviously knew what I was up to so he was being nice and letting me have the apartment for awhile. He’d come later, after everyone was either gone or asleep in my room. And that’s why I love that boy, he knows me so well.
“Alright then, we’re heading out. Call me if you need anything.”
Giving him a quick hug, we were out the door in a rush.
(Yoongi)
I finished the body painting, admired my work for a bit, then headed out to the club. I want to see the performance, I swear I do, partly, kinda. Screw it, I want to find preppy college boy and talk with him. Who knew, he could be a pretty good release for my stress after today and painting all night on a moving canvas. I scanned the dance floor, no such luck. Looking to the bar, I caught a glimpse of him in a booth towards the back. Good, he hasn’t seen me yet. I walk around the long way, making sure I stay hidden by the throngs of drunk people stumbling around and bumping into me. I swear, one more drunk idiot running into me, I will just have to go all psycho on them, and that’s not hard for me to do lately.
I make my way to the far side of the booth, sliding in beside him. I have just a few seconds to really look at him before he notices I am in his booth. He is pretty hot for a preppy college kid. This close, those eyes are extremely sexy. His jawline is perfect, and i find myself wanting to run my tongue over it. Shit, it has been way too long. That red hair gives his complexion a haunting paleness. It reminds me of coffee with almost too much cream, but you want it anyway. It’s smooth and flawless. The way his adam’s apple bobs when he swallows, make me want to make it bob for other reasons.
If he doesn’t talk soon, I may be having a one night stand right here, and not that I would mind that, but he probably would. Ah, he looks at me at last.
“Hey there preppy college boy. Names Yoongi, What’s yours?”
(Namjoon)
When the song ended, I made my way off the floor and back to the booth. Hoseok stayed behind, his hands on his girlfriend’s hips as she swayed to the music, and his boyfriend behind him, plastered against his back. By the blissed out look on his face, I knew that I’d be staying behind at the club while he took them home. It meant a couple more hours at the club for me, but I didn’t mind. At least my best friend was happy. Sure enough, after another half-hour, he made his way over to me, politely asking me if I were ready to go. Shaking my head, I told him to go ahead, I was going to hang out a bit longer. Winking at me, he took his leave.
“Alright then, we’re heading out. Call me if you need anything.”
He hugged me, then headed for the door. I waved as they left, then sighed as I sank into the plush back of the booth. I was tired, and I really did want to go home, but there was no way I was going to cock-block my best friend. And even if going home didn’t hinder his ability to be with his lovers, it would certainly not help my mood to hear the three of them, with our rooms sharing a wall. No, thank you, that was something I’d avoid at all costs.
I was so immersed in my thoughts that I didn’t even see him coming. Usually, with someone who has caught my interest as much as he had, I made it a point to keep tabs on them. Unfortunately, this time I let my guard down, and all of a sudden, I wasn’t alone in the booth anymore. Blinking, I realized he’d slid in across from me, and was staring at me intently, studying me. I have no idea how long he’d been there, but I could read the hunger in his eyes well enough. I had a feeling that he didn’t let people read him very often, but here he was, looking at me as if I were a particularly tasty treat. I swallow, hard, and his eyes follow the movement of my adam’s apple. When he finally speaks, the sound sends blood straight to my cock, making me half hard in an instant.
“Hey there preppy college boy. Name’s Yoongi. What’s yours?”
As far as pickup lines go, it’s kind of cheesy, and I want to laugh, but I get the feeling that that wouldn’t go over very well with him. So instead, I shrug. It’s half a protective measure, half a flirt. I don’t know if I could even answer him if I wanted to- he makes me nervous, and being nervous makes it hard for me to capture the words I want to use. I feel the heat rising in my cheeks, suddenly worried that I may not be able to speak at all. And, suddenly reckless, I make a huge effort to answer him, for heaven only knows what reason. I know this is a bad idea, but I can’t seem to stop myself.
“Namjoon”
(Yoongi)
So, his name is Namjoon. And that voice, it's so soft. Not like soft soft, but just the right amount of soft. As I look at him, I can tell he's getting nervous, and I secretly want to warn him that he has good reason to be.
I'm usually not as nice in the bed as I am in public, a few lovers have found that out the hard way. I like control, lots of it, and that innocence in his face tells me he hasn't been treated as rough as I like it. I hear my brain telling my crotch, guess you need to break him in. I really want to listen to my brain right now.
I feel a familiar stirring low in my gut, but if I plan on taking him home, I have a feeling I need to take it slow and play my cards right. Guess my little brain didn't get the memo, though.
“I see your friends left, need a ride home?”
(Namjoon)
“I see your friends left, need a ride home?”
A small, quiet voice inside me is telling me that accepting a ride home from this guy- Yoongi- would be the epitome of a bad idea. I usually listen to said voice- I’ve had years to learn that it’s usually the thing I should listen to when I’m making important decisions.
And if there were ever an important choice to be made, this is it.
I swallow nervously, his hot gaze staring me down, seeming to promise so many things I’d love tonight, but that I might well regret in the morning.
Still, nothing ventured, nothing gained, right?
I nod almost imperceptibly, then I say it out loud, just to make sure he knows I’m accepting.
“Yes, I suppose I will.”
I readjust my body, acting like I’m relaxing, when in fact I’m more aware of him than ever, waiting to see what he’ll say.
(Yoongi)
Nice! I get to take him home, but not to his place if I can convince him to come home with me.
I begin thinking, with my little brain, all that I could do to those pouty lips. I don't usually prefer the younger ones, but there is something about him that makes me want to break him. I really hope he's not as innocent as he appears, because that would make me feel bad if I cause him some pain.
I nod, getting up from the booth. When he stands up beside me, I find that he is almost my height and actually had some semblance of strength in his body. Oh boy, this could be fun.
We head out, walking the short distance in silence. I wonder what he's thinking, hopefully the same thing I am. A one night stand, that's all I need, to get today's frustrations out of my system. Rough, hard sex, just the way I like it.
“So, college boy, your place or mine?”
@seoulsunshineandstories @kwonnansi @xjamlessparkx @berryjam17
@min-shookga-yoongi @beautifulseoulliar @agustd-suga-yoongii @astronomyturtle @aspaceformyself @dreamyoongi @holy-yoongi@trashkazuya @maxinaptak @micky1518 @rosiemilas @karri570
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What sort of internet users would the companions be? Like who's the sad nihilist meme shitposter, who has a youtube channel and what's it about, who has a pretentious inspirational quotes aesthetic blog, that sort of thing. Ellie, DiMA, and Father included just because I think it would be amusing.
Ada runs a general mental health and wellness blog, dedicated to helping people manage their mental illness as well as just general tips for staying emotionally well. Her blog gets really popular around finals week, when the panicked students need her advice on managing stress and anxiety. Her techniques are guaranteed by many a therapist and psychologist.
Cait’s channel is solely dedicated to posting fortage of assorted bar fights. Most of which she is involved in. A friend films them for her, and she posts them later along with a picture of how she looked after the fact. Some of her videos are her just doing increasingly dangerous shit to see if she can. Front flipping off the roof, for example.
Codsworth has one of those “how to adult” blogs where he teaches people about landscaping, how to get stains out of clothes in an emergency, how to make coffee in a mug using only a microwave and some coffee grounds. Also assorted other posts about properly doing the laundry for people moving out of the house for the first time.
Curie is the science side of literally any website she can manage. She probably has a “fun science fact of the day” that she posts every morning. She’s like a Bill Nye on the scene, being nothing but sweet to everyone she interacts with, no matter how hostile they are. She has been known to stumble into some unsavory content on occasion, but always with only the desire to educate on what is and isn’t scientifically possible.
Danse’s fitness inspiration blog is actually full of good advice. He has meal plans, workout models, and a couple videos of him demonstrating proper form for difficult exercises. Constantly features other blogs and transformations as motivation for those struggling. Posts motivational quotes as well. Has a collection of workout shirts with said quotes on them.
Deacon has a very successful makeup YouTube. His everyday looks are absolutely to die for, but his most popular videos are the ones detailing his disguises, etc. The most interesting thing is that he is never his own model, and instead gets a variety of guests that he puts the makeup onto. Everyone has to wonder who he really is, and there are tons of theories.
DiMA runs a zen/aesthetic blog with sprinklings of philosophy. He has some meditation and yoga tips, as well as a lot of nature shots that are just generally soothing. It’s a great study break blog. If you stay on it too long, though, you will inevitably run across a post that makes you question the entire nature of your identity and the universe.
Ellie wishes her twitter was just a shitpost generator like everyone thinks, but in reality it’s her trying to make light of her real life. It holds legendary tweets such as “When your boss gets kidnapped and you’re wondering if it’s ethical to forge a recommendation letter” and “Fellas, if you put another guy’s memories in your head, is that gay? I mean, you’re sharing a body with another dude…”
Father has one of those blogs that you probably will end up blocking at some point in time. You followed it at first, thinking it would be similar to Curie’s, and it is, on occasion. However, he also tends to get tangled up on the wrong side of ethical and moral debates, and you’ll get tired of seeing the discourse in your feed every morning.
Gage doesn’t actually post original content, he just comments on other people’s stuff. Literally an internet troll. He loves to try to get a rise out of people, and he considers internet arguing to just be a pastime. It’s probably to distract himself from the chaos of his own life, so he feels like he has control over something, anything.
Hancock runs a YouTube channel that’s just full of his own high ramblings. Essentially he just turns on the camera, gets high, and goes about his usual shenanigans. Sometimes he has guests on the show, mostly Fahrenheit who accidentally gets featured when she wanders in on him. But he’ll take pretty much any guests, as long as they’re willing to get high, too.
MacCready has a gun tips YouTube channel which is mostly just him showing off his sick sniping skills. His son makes frequent guest appearances, helping his dad demonstrate how to use proper gun safety with handguns and the like. His safety videos are really solid, but his most popular ones are of him shooting the bullseye on the target in increasingly difficult positions. For example, standing on his head.
Nick runs a blog mostly dedicated to dad jokes, but there’s also some pretty solid life advice on there. He’s the unofficial dad/grandpa of thousands of people across the internet. He’s somehow active 24 hours a day, and is always ready to give crisis comfort to one of the many people he’s adopted. The jokes are funny, too, but no one is willing to admit it.
Old Longfellow has a YouTube where he details both hunting and alcohol, sometimes both. He reviews certain alcohols, shows off his favorite drinks, and is always drunk by the end of his videos. This includes the hunting ones. Sometimes, he just baits creatures that are three times as strong as him to see if he’ll live. Whatever he posts is always a wild and entertaining ride.
Piper is trying to run a legitimate news blog, but mostly she gets labeled as a conspiracy theorist. She tries to fight back with facts and accuracy, and she has a huge following. She’s never sure which of her followers are legitimately interested in what she has to say and which ones are just there to laugh at her “crazy” ideas.
Preston likes to run his own little diy and gardening blog. He loves to post his composting and recycling tips, as well of pictures of his garden and latest recycling project. He quietly encourages people to make a living for themselves instead of relying on someone else for their livelihood. The number of things he can make out of a pickle jar is impressive.
Strong has a literature analysis blog. He’s got a specific taste for Shakespeare, going on for huge paragraphs about the subtext and picking apart all the jokes and innuendos while still maintaining a huge respect for the works. Every so often, he lets his followers give him something to read and analyze, which led to the most epic demolition of 50 Shades of Gray anyone had ever seen.
X6, to everyone’s surprise, is the sad nihilistic memer. It takes literal years to pin him to his content, because nobody would expect he’s the one making the casual depression and anxiety memes. He has the largest following of anyone, because his memes honestly are funny and relatable. He’s now constantly irritated by everyone he knows as they ask him if he’s okay, though.
#fallout#fallout 4#fo4#fo4 companions#fallout 4 companions#fallout 4 companions react#ada#cait#curie#codsworth#danse#deacon#ellie#dima#gage#hancock#maccready#nick valentine#old longfellow#piper wright#preston garvey#strong#x6-88
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a comprehsive list of the best lyrics in each taylor swift song (my opinions <3) since fearless:
jump then fall: but i’ll hold you through the night until you smile
untouchable: untouchable like a distant diamond sky
come in with the rain: i know you by heart, and you don’t even know where i start
superstar: i’m invisible and everyone knows who you are
other side of the door: and the faded picture of a beautiful night
fearless: you take my hand and drag me head first, fearless
fifteen: when you’re fifteen and your first kiss makes your head spin ‘round (how did she know!!)
love story: i was a scarlet letter
hey stephen: all the other girls, well, they’re beautiful, but would they write a song for you?
white horse: this is a big world, that was a small town
you belong with me: i know your favorite songs and you tell be ‘bout your dreams
breathe: but it’s killing me to see you go after all this time
tell me why: why do you have to make me feel small so you can feel whole inside?
you’re not sorry: and you got your share of secrets and i’m tired of being last to know
the way i loved you: and my heart’s not breaking cause i’m not feeling anything at all
forever & always: were you just kidding?
the best day: don’t know if snow white’s house is near or far away
change: it’s hard to fight when the fight ain’t fair
mine: braced myself for the goodbye ‘cause that’s all i’ve ever known
sparks fly: my mind forgets to remind me, you’re a bad idea
back to december: it turns out freedom ain’t nothing but missing you
speak now: i lose myself in a daydream
dear john: i lived in your chess game but you changed the rules everyday
mean: you have pointed out my flaws again as if i don’t already see them
the story of us: you held your pride like you should’ve held me
never grow up: remember that she’s getting older too
enchanted: my thoughts will echo your name until i see you again
better than revenge: no amount of vintage dresses gives you dignity
innocent: today is never too late to be brand new
haunted: something keeps me holding onto nothing
last kiss: i never planned on you changing your mind // i’ll watch your life in pictures like i used to watch you sleep and i’ll feel you forget me like i used to feel you breathe (this song is too much of a masterpiece to choose)
long live: i had the time of my life fighting dragons with you
state of grace: we learned to live with the pain, mosaic broken hearts
red: moving on from him is impossible when i still see it all in my head
treacherous: i can’t decide if it’s a choice getting swept away
ikywt: and the saddest fear comes creeping in, that you never loved me
all too well: you call me up again just be break me like a promise, so casually cruel in the name of being honest (naturally)
22: it’s miserable and magical
i almost do: i can’t say hello to you and risk another goodbye
wanegbt: this is exhausting (hehe)
stay stay stay: you took the time to memorize me
the last time: all roads, they lead me here
holy ground: for the first time, i had something to lose
sad beautiful tragic: you’ve got you demons and darling they all look like me // silence, train runs off its tracks
the lucky one: you don’t feel pretty, you just feel used
everything has changed: all i know is pouring rain
starlight: we could get married, have ten kids, and teach them how to dream
begin again: thinking all love ever does is break and burn and end
welcome to new york: kaleidoscope of loud heartbeats under coats
blank space: stolen kisses, pretty lies
style: could end in burning flames of paradise
out of the woods: the rest of the world was black and white but we were in screaming color
ayhtdws: i’ve been picking up the pieces of the mess you made
shake it off: and to the fella over there with the hella good hair
i wish you would: i wish you knew that i miss you too much to be mad anymore
bad blood: bandaids don’t fix bullet holes
wildest dreams: someday when you leave me i bet these memories follow you around
how you get the girl: i want you for worse or for better
this love: this love left a permanent mark
i know places: love’s a fragile little flame, it could burn out
clean: just because you’re clean don’t mean you don’t miss it
ready for it: burton to this taylor
end game: your handprint’s on my soul
i did something bad: you gotta leave before you get left
don’t blame me: i would fall from grace just to touch your face
delicate: are you ever dreaming of me?
look what you made me do: i’ll be the actress starring in your bad dreams
so it goes: you did a number on me but honestly baby, who’s counting?
gorgeous: whiskey on ice, sunset and vine
getaway car: but with three of us, honey, it’s a sideshow
king of my heart: say you fancy me, not fancy stuff
dancing with our hands tied: i’m the mess that you wanted
dress: even in my worst of times, you could see the best in me
tiwwchnt: feeling so gatsby for that whole year (bonus points for the haha i can’t even say it with a straight face)
call it what you want: i brought a knife to a gun fight
new year’s day: please don’t ever become a stranger whose laugh i could recognize anywhere
i forgot that you existed: it isn’t love, it isn’t hate, it’s just indifference
cruel summer: he looks up grinning like a devil (!!)
lover: with every guitar string scar on my hand
the man: they wouldn’t shake their heads and question how much of this i deserve
the archer: i’ve got a hundred thrown out speeches i almost said to you
i think he knows: lyrical smile, indigo eyes
miss americana: american glory faded before me
paper rings: the moon is high like your friends were the night that we first met
cornelia street: that's the kind of heartbreak time could never mend
death by a thousand cuts: but if the story’s over, why am i still writing pages?
london boy: don’t threaten me with a good time (also the intro, ofc)
soon you’ll get better: desperate people find faith, so now i pray to Jesus too
false god: you’re the west village
you need to calm down: shade never made anybody less gay!
afterglow: fighting with a true love is boxing with no gloves
me: i know i never think before i jump
it’s nice to have a friend: you’ve been stressed out lately, yeah, me too
daylight: the luck of the draw only draws the unlucky
(update 1/14/21)
the 1: you know the greatest loves of all time are over now
cardigan: trying to change the ending, peter losing wendy
the last great american dynasty: and in a feud with her neighbor, she stole his dog and dyed it a key-lime green
exile: you never gave a warning sign/i gave so many signs
my tears ricochet: when you can’t sleep at night, you hear my stolen lullabies
mirrorball: the masquerade revelers
seven: please picture me in the weeds before i learned civility
august: you weren’t mine to lose (but also, just the entire song)
this is me trying: you’re a flashback in a film reel
illicit affairs: a dwindling mercurial high
invisible string: one single thread of gold tied me to you
mad woman: it’s obvious that wanting me dead has really brought you two together
epiphany: sir, i think he’s bleeding out
betty: i don’t know anything, but i know i miss you
peace: all these people think love’s for show, but i would die for you in secret
hoax: you knew you won so what’s the point of keeping score?
the lakes: i want auroras and sad prose
willow: life was a willow and it bent right to your wind
champagne problems: she would’ve made such a lovely bride, what a shame she’s fucked in the head
gold rush: at dinner parties i call you out on your contrarian shit
tis the damn season: to leave the warmest bed i’ve ever known
tolerate it: i know my love should be celebrated, but you tolerate it
no body, no crime: good thing his mistress took out a big life insurance policy (honorable mention to the way taylor says “just” in “she thinks i did it but she just can’t prove it)
happiness: i hope she’ll be a beautiful fool
dorothea: you’re a queen selling dreams, selling makeup and magazines
coney island: do you miss the rogue who coaxed you into paradise and left you there?
ivy: your touch brought forth an incandescent glow, tarnished but so grand
cowboy like me: forever is the sweetest con
long story short: long story short, i survived
marjorie: you loved the amber skies so much
closure: i’m fine with my spite and my tears and my beers and my candles
evermore: barefoot in the wildest winter
right where you left me: she’s still twenty-three inside her fantasy
it’s time to go: that old familiar body ache that snaps from the same little breaks in your soul
#taylor swift#red#speak now#reputation#1989#fearless#lover#folklore#evermore#this took me longer than it should have
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Reputation Tour Movie: Reactions
On the off chance anyone has wanted to know what it’s like to deal with my commentary when I will not shut the fuck up, click that read more to get my Reputation Movie commentary!
Opening
- Taylor is the most extra bitch. I love her.
- Opening video still gives me chills
...Ready For It?
- The strobe lights make this as sometimes irritating to watch as it was live. Which is a pity because I love the performance.
I Did Something Bad
- Will idsb ever not give me chills and murder me?
- I want her to bite me when she snarls
- Her hips. The idiot giraffe is blessed.
- Her vocals
- Fuck Me Up
- The most precious happiest koala😭
- (spots a rep room wristband) lucky bitch
Gorgeous
- I’m So disappointed a step above gorgeous being gorgeous didn’t get immortalized in the tour video
- The assholes (I say out of jealousy) with the triangles. Why didn’t we think of that!
- “And I’m Taylor” Bitch I hope so. I spend so much on your ass.
- Stop looking like that Taylor it makes me feel things
Style
- I get why style made the set list and love the songs but justice for ootw
- That guitar riff gives me ALL THE FEELS
- yes bitch strut! Thank you Karlie Kloss
Love Story
- Aww all the throwback and legacy feels
- Is it legal not to jump during this song?
- Boop.
- “I keep waiting for you but you never cum” is probably not a problem Taylor has. On either end.
You Belong With Me
- (proceeds to bounce in place because Taylor owns me)
- The parent holding up her daughter is Kristen in the future
Look What You Made Me Do
- The lwymmd pre video is my sexuality
- I want murderess snake queen Taylor to end. my. life.
- Would let her choke me
- I’m the bitch mouthing oh my god
- This is my favourite part of the tour ngl
- THAT SMIRK
- side note: also remember when we thought it was a dragon and not a snake?
- She really snapped and killed a bitch with this song
- THE INTENSITY WENT OFF AND HOW IS PIT NOT LOSING THEIR SHIT
- like mosh or something fuckers
- KARYN!
- I weirdly love the back vocals she recorded for lwymmd. The short “ah”s really make it
- The sass
- A queen
- I’m so gay
- This is why I’m doomed with whoever I date
End Game
- The disappointment Ed never guested on the tour
- The choreo for this is 🔥
- I mean all of it is but her hips
- Her legs are worth every penny of 40 million
- The hand over the face bit is an objectively weird closing move
King Of My Heart
- How do we actually make her America’s queen
- This is the softest song
- I stan komh so hard
- Like I love delicate but this is just as soft. Softer even
- I love I’m getting to see the other half of the choreo because we sat on the left side each time
- Up on the roof with a school girl crush / Drinking beer out of plastic cups / Say you fancy me not fancy stuff / BABY ALL IT ONCE THIS IS ENOUGH
- This is the closest we’ve come to a poc love interest in anything she’s filmed. Except the End Game MV sort of.
- We didn’t stan the dancers hard enough
- The drums made this tbh
Delicate
- Oh gods I’m not ready for the delicate speech
- I’m the dude who screamed he loved her
- Bless the rainbow dress
- “Shit is that what is was on my wrist? I thought her stalker and taylurking ways had just finally gone to tracking bracelets.”
- (knock at the door) Me, pausing: umm I blocked out this entire 2 hours for our lorde and saviour Taylor Swift???
- (Scott Swift voice) I’m going back into my zone
- The lights are so pretty. No wonder Taylor loves the bracelets
- Bitch we know your unreleased stuff
- Do let’s go/battle as a surprise song and be shook
- 1! 2! 3! LET’S GO BITCH!
- Can you believe she flew right over us
- That little dance. She’s so fucking precious
Shake It Off
- B stage. Remember how she gave invisible to the gays
- And finally played breath
- The only redeeming thing for shake it off is that she made it as gay as she could
-I still wanna know what inspired “my ex man brought his new girlfriend...to the fella over there with the hella good hair” bit
- What did Di do? And who did Taylor hit on? Or is Karlie the one with the hella good hair?
- Giuseppe got down on one knee long before Karlie ever will
Dancing With Our Hands Tied
- How smug was Taylor when her jump to pop worked?
- There must have been so many I told you so’s
- It started raining. The closest I’ll ever come to a rain show.
- I can’t believe she played this song in Nashville with Karlie right there and kept her shit together
- Taylor’s never more magical then when it’s just her and a guitar
- I would give anything and go deep in debt to go to an acoustic show
- This filter was unnecessary and such a call out
- She had one fuck left and it’s name is alliterative
All Too Well
- I hope she keeps doing acoustic surprise songs like this next tour. Where it’s a set thing.
- I’m so relieved she approves of lyric tattoos. Like....imagine if she didn’t and I have my entire forearm
- Put down your fucking phones and watch her be magic personified
- Also fuck this song for being so powerful
- The way she sings the bridge
- Now did she really lose the 12 minute version or is it just a little too obvious who it’s about
- Her wink! I’d die
- Is that chick okay? Did she live?
Blank Space
- The crowd walk! I’m still so so fucking endlessly proud
- Look at her!
- My precious angel reclaiming walking through her fans
- How the fuck are these people not dying tho?
- Still want her to hit me in the face with the golf club
- And kick me in the face with her boots
- This is also still my favourite mv
- It was so perfect
- This is also quality choreo. I wouldn’t have made it had it seen it right in front of me
- Gay icons
Dress
- Holy fuck dress is so gay
- Like.....we been knew but still
- This song is why she didn’t dare film in Nashville
- The vocals should be illegal
- Like, they’re NSFL (Not Safe For Lesbians)
- The first time she did that (strip tease thing) and the Nashville show were the best ones
Should Have Said No / Bad Blood
- This is still the most fucking random mash up
- I mean it works and redeems bad blood but wtf
- The person sitting on someone else’s shoulders has to really be pissing off someone else who can’t see
- Aggressive banjo
- Can’t believe she puts on a show and sells like this and Borschetta wouldn’t give her the masters. Idiot
- The dudes dangling are braver than any US Marine
- Instead she negotiated for better artist pay AND her future masters. The Legend jumped out
- I remember watching this the first time and being briefly confused because this sort of drawn out thing is what they normally do for show closing but it was too early
Don’t Blame Me
- Oh fuck here we go
- THIS IS MY FAVOURITE TOUR OUTFIT
- PERIOD
- ACCEPT NO SUBSTITUTES
- this entire fucking performance. No words
- I love all the dude dancers had the blinders like headgear. As if such powerful sapphic love is distinctly not for their consumption
- I have found religion
- I stan a queen
Long Live / New Year’s Day
- I love she knows how many people work on the tour and genuinely appreciates their effort
- I hope this mashup sticks around, at least as the surprise song at the closing show of the next tour
- I’m not crying you’re crying
- Hold on to the memories, they/I will hold onto you is one on my favourite lines she’s written
- Along with with please don’t ever become a stranger whose laugh I could recognize anywhere
- Oh my fucking god stop letting her be this precious
- Remember how fucking loud we were in Denver?
- This is my favourite moment of the entire show - for her. You can tell how much it means to her
- She owns my ass and wallet forevermore
- “I had the time of my life....with you” is a whole emotional mood
- Her quick little thank you 😭
Why She Disappeared
- Oh that’s the first time I’ve heard the echos
- Those boots probably cost more than my life
- This should have been the close or open of the getaway car mv
- Imagine if it shows up in an mv next era. Starts with a car on a pink x
Getaway Car
- The 1989 neon is an interesting choice
- Is that the shift to pop being a getaway or the close of the 1989 era being one? (More thoughts on this later)
- Hits you like a shotgun shot to the Heart is a fucking amazing line
- I loved that bit straight away
- I can lowkey see getaway car being about switching labels tbh
- This last album maybe IS the getaway car (more, again, later)
Call It What You Want
- Ciwyw is one on my favourite love songs of hers
- Trust him like NO OTHER was right at her fingertips
- Who the fuck would say no to running away with her?
- I would let her RUN ME OVER, running away WITH her? Fuck yes
We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together / This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things
- WANEGBT/TIWWCHNT is a brilliant mash up
- But fucking ridiculous to type
- “But I’m not the friend you’ve lost lately” is the shadiest fucking line and I love it
- I’m disappointed we never got video of her recording “cause forgiveness is a nice thing to do”. I can only imagine the sass and snark
- “Taylor the mic is picking up you muttering ‘fucking prick’. You need to record it again.”
- “.....Taylor, muttering ‘backstabbing motherfucker’ isn’t any better. Maybe try it without the muttering?”
- The mouthed “I love you guys” ❤😭
- They’re not showing people collecting confetti? How unrealistic.
- Oh, there they are.
- “The words are all the same over and over again and I know that’s my fault....” still funny as hell
- “What’s a 767?” What’s it like to have that kind of money?
- Will pay to watch Taylor skip through a stadium
In conclusion: Taylor owns me. Kristen puts up with a lot from me. And I can’t wait for the next chapter.
#taylor swift#do any of you care? no.#but i might as well have blown up Kristen's phone for a reason#that was meant to be under a read more the first time
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Fly Me to the Moon :: Ch 1
Genre: Pure fluff crack
Word Count: 2,510
Pair: Yoongi x Jimin
Collaborated with @tayvengeance
Chapter: 1
"CHEER UP THIS SAD, EMO BOY!"
02-222-3333
Jimin stared at the note on the bathroom wall for a solid 5 minutes before he pulled out his phone and typed in the number.
authors note: we do not own any of the pictures, for better formatting so it’s more comfortable to read, check it out on AO3!
AO3 link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14944508/chapters/34626863
Twitters:
Tae’s
Sujin’s
<3 - Tae & sujin
Chat with Mochi_Moves
2015.11.15
14:00
Mochi_Moves:
Will this make you feel happier?
SUGA:
What the fuck
Who is this?
Mochi_Moves:
That doesn’t matter. Did the picture make you laugh? c:
SUGA:
No what the fuck
I think you have the wrong #
Mochi_Moves:
Aw :c
No, I just found this number and wanted to make you a happy emo boy!
SUGA:
Wait, who are you
How do you know I’m emo
Also it’s not emo
It’s grunge
Fuck you
Mochi_Moves:
But..I’m not supposed to tell strangers my name :c
Just call me Mochi
I’ll be your anonymous friend c:
Why are you a sad grunge boy?
SUGA:
Life is a bitch
That’s why.
Mochi_Moves:
Ohmygod, this poor soul
Who hurt you??????
SUGA:
Like i’m gonna tell a stranger my life story
Mochi_Moves:
But didn’t you know?
It’s easier to tell strangers
Come on c: c: c:
SUGA:
Add another smile to that and I just might strangle you
I’m kidding
But not really
Mochi_Moves:
:c
SUGA:
Now that’s a relatable emotion
Mochi_Moves:
Okay alright
I won’t pressure you
You can tell me tomorrow c:
Instead tell me something happy about yourself!
c:
SUGA:
I have mint hair.
I guess that’s happy?
Idk
Coloured hair makes me happier
Mochi_Moves:
Mint???? Wow!
I’ve never seen anyone with mint hair
That must look so cool *.*
SEND ME A PICTURE
SUGA:
No, what if you’re a predator
I’ve watched Catfish
I know how this shit goes
Mochi_Moves:
But I’m not! Just the hair
Pleeeaaassseee?
c:
SUGA:
Only if you tell me who you are
Mochi_Moves:
How do I know you’re not a predator either?
Maybe you’re the bathroom janitor for all I know
SUGA:
YOU’RE THE ONE WHO KNEW I WAS AN
EMO BOY
YOU MESSAGED ME FIRST
Mochi_Moves:
I just found it in the bathroom and wanted to
cheer up a sad grunge emo boy
SUGA:
Goddammit Hoseok.
He fucking put my number on the
stall wall again, didn’t he
I’m gonna fight him
Last time he did this, I got calls
nonstop
Mochi_Moves:
Hoseok?
JUNG HOSEOK??????
SUGA:
for a week.
Holy shit.
You know my arch nemesis?
Mochi_Moves:
Yeah! I dance with him!
He’s a great friend
Annoying sometimes…
BUt wonderful c:
SUGA:
Holy shit
You’re that Jimin kid he always
talks about
The revered dancer
“God, Yoongi you should see him. The way he moves his body is
the closest humans will get to magic.”
Mochi_Moves:
He really said something like that??
Wow, he’s really pushing it
Hah..
But you exposed yourself,
Nice to meet you Min Yoongi c:
SUGA:
That’s Yoongi HYUNG to you
Well, since I know you’re not going to prey on my gay ass
Mochi_Moves:
Ah, well
Two gay boys can be friends
c:
So don’t worry
I won’t be a gay predator
SUGA:
Fellas,
Is it gay to have gay friends
Mochi_Moves:
Let’s try it and see if it’ll answer your question!
c:
SUGA:
Well, I showed my face.
Your turn, punk.
Mochi_Moves:
I’m not a punk :c
According to Hoseok
I’m a soft mochi
SUGA:
Is that that Taehyung kid
He’s in my art class
I swear to GOD
Loudass motherfucker
But I guess he makes me laugh
Mochi_Moves:
BITCHDV
WATCH WOT U SAY BOU
M E
I KNOW WHE REY
YOU SIT
SUGA:
Holy shit he’s been reading over
your shoulder?
Hey kid, you’re wild. I admire it.
Especially when you got the fire alarm to go off
in the middle of free painting the other day.
Idk how you did it. You didn’t even leave your
seat.
Mochi_Moves:
I hav my ways
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Next time i jasdskjf
Sdfgk
Sorry! Taehyung took my phone
When I left the room
But yes it’s the one and only
We’re roommates
c:
SUGA:
I see. So no hanging at your place.
Haha
I’m just kidding
Not really
But yeah
Mochi_Moves:
Oh, so you do want to
come over sometime then?
Is that what you’re saying?
c: c: c:
SUGA:
I thought we had bonded over being
Hobi’s friend
I thought WE were gay pals
Without it being gay
Mochi_Moves:
Ah, you’re right!
I thought maybe
You already went onto the next base
Im so glad it didn’t turn out like that
My best gay pal c:
Second to Taehyung of course
SUGA:
I mean, you are a handsome fella
But
I don’t uh, date, really.
Mochi_Moves:
Ahhhh, does your love life
have to do with you being a sad emo grunge boy?
A tragic backstory?
SUGA:
A tale for another time.
(like far beyond this time)
Hahaha
Mochi_Moves:
So like
tomorrow?
SUGA:
Someone’s persistent
Why do you wanna know so bad?
Gonna try to fix the depressed grunge boy?
Mochi_Moves:
You’re just an interesting person
Min yoongi
I’ll figure you out c:
SUGA:
That’s hyung to you, brat.
Chat with Mochi_Moves
2015.11.16
02:30
Mochi_Moves:
Did this cheer you up?
c:
He had too much soju last night
SUGA:
You all drank without me
What the fuck
Mochi_Moves:
I’m sorry :c
I’ll invite you next time!
It was a night out for the dance team
But it can just be us the next time
And I’ll bring taehyung
And hoseok
c:
You don’t want to be around the dance team
When they’re drunk
Trust me
SUGA:
I’ll take your word for it.
Mochi_Moves:
But did it cheer you up????
SUGA:
How can I not laugh at his dumb face
Mochi_Moves:
Just don’t tell him
He’ll make me do push ups for days
if he finds out I have this
considering he blacked out
and doesn't remember a thing
heh
SUGA:
I told him you found my number yesterday
He screamed
Then he sent me this:
And asked how gay I was for you
Mochi_Moves:
DELETE THIS NOW
!!!!
SUGA:
No. it brings me joy.
Mochi_Moves:
Yoongi
Whyy
:c
SUGA:
Hey, haven’t you been trying to make me
happy?
It worked.
Mochi_Moves:
That’s true..
My pain is your happiness
c’:
SUGA:
But I told him I wasn’t gay for you
AND THEN
He sent me this:
And said “how about now?”
I just need to know, what was the
occasion?
Mochi_Moves:
Why does hyung still have this
I swear
I’m going to go talk to this..
Brb
He’s in the other room
c:
SUGA:
Tell him I said thank you for our new
Kakao chat background pic
Mochi_Moves:
YOU DIDNT
MIN YOONGI
TELL ME YOU
DIDNT
SUGA:
Mochi_Moves:
That’s..heh
I don’t know what to say to that
Asdfhjkl
That was a performance I did a few years back
For a dance competition
Hoseok hyung begged
I didn’t want to
But i did anyway, it’s hyung
I can’t say no to him
I retired the exposed chest look
So don’t expect another one
C:
Ever
SUGA:
Not to sound gay or anything
But
You have a nice body.
Good job.
Mochi_Moves:
What about you Mint Yoongi?
What do you do?
SUGA:
Write/compose/play music
A lil art here n there
I’m skilled on the piano.
And I have some beats on soundcloud
Mochi_Moves:
Wow! I love a good artist c:
Have you released anything to music companies??
SUGA:
Uh...
Kinda?
Mochi_Moves:
You must be famous! Can I hear some of your work??
SUGA:
I’m about as famous as you.
https://soundcloud.com/bangtan/agustd103
There you go, I guess.
Mochi_Moves:
It sounds amazing!
You’re so talented
One day you could compose a song
For one of my shows???
How cool would that be?!
SUGA:
Woah, take me to dinner first
Mochi_Moves:
So are you asking for a date??
Mint Yoongi
We haven’t even met formally yet…
So fast..
SUGA:
You were the one talking about intimacies
Composing a song for someone is as
intimate as fucking them.
Mochi_Moves:
Alright alright
Just gay best pals
Who’ve never met
c:
SUGA:
Well are you insinuating that we should get up
get out and go meet somewhere?
Mochi_Moves:
That would be a good start
Besides
Hoseoks been wanting me to meet you for forever now
I just never had the time
Let’s do it for the sake of this poor hyung
SUGA:
It’s a monday morning.
I don’t have class.
We’re getting coffee.
Also
Why is Hobi hyung but you REFUSE TO
CALL ME HYUNG
Mochi_Moves:
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Meet me at the campus cafe at 10?
SUGA:
Yeah. Sounds good.
Chat With Mochi_Moves
2015.11.25
13:00
SUGA:
Hey
Heyyy
Heyyyyyyy
Jimin
Ji
Min
Mochi_Moves:
Mint Yoongi?
Hi!
What
What is it?
SUGA:
Did I leave my composition notebook
at your place?
I can’t find it
And I’m honestly freaking out
I’m gonna have a panic attack
All my songs are in there
And some stuff I don’t want people
poking around in
Mochi_Moves:
Give me just a second, I’m walking back to my room
I’m almost there
SUGA:
Fuckkkkk
Okay
It’s okay
Mochi_Moves:
Oh goodness
Uh
I found it!
I caught Taehyung holding it, but I don’t think he read anything
I’ve never lurched at him so quickly
Do you want me to drop it off?
c:
SUGA:
Yes <3
Ew
That heart was so entirely
A you thing
Mochi_Moves:
Aw c:
You’re sending hearts now
SUGA:
Did it make yours go bangya bangya
Mochi_Moves:
Just a little
c:
SUGA:
That’s fucking gay wow
Mochi_Moves:
I’ll safely return your notebook now!
I’ll guard it with my life
And I won’t read anything
I promise
<3
SUGA:
Jimin
You’re a true hero
I might end up composing that song for
you if you don’t watch out.
Mochi_Moves:
You want to go to the next base already?
wow
I’m impressed
SUGA:
Don’t get your hopes up, sweetie
My emotional capacity is that of a
teaspoon.
Mochi_Moves:
If you triple the recipe, you’ll get a tablespoon
I just gotta triple my love
And your emotional capacity will go up
c:
SUGA:
Which girl group sang that
Bc that’s what you sound like
It’s pretty gay.
Mochi_Moves:
I live with a gay roommate,
I learn a lot of gay things from him
Now open up Mint Yoongi
I’m outside
SUGA:
I would yell @ you for not calling me hyung
But i want my damn notebook.
I’m coming.
Chat With Mochi_Moves
2015.11.27
02:50
Mochi_Moves:
Mint Yoondi
Min
T
Yonff
Ccd:
SUGA:
Wha
Are you drunk?
Mochi_Moves:
Yeff
Yessd
So muffh soju
Whaff aru yo u ding
SUGA:
Where are you?
Are you safe?
Mochi_Moves:
I jusf go t home
Tae t ae passef out
I wasa bored
And mussed u
SUGA:
You saw me like 7 hours ago
Mochi_Moves:
Oghmygo
Ohmydo
That wascd so lo ng ago
::(
SUGA:
Jimin
You should drink water and go to sleep
Please
For your health
Mochi_Moves:
Im
Im nof tierd
Ill dinrk wahter though
Aru you still u p wrintinh musi
C
???/
SUGA:
As usual.
Mochi_Moves:
WHAt isi it about this tim e/?
SUGA:
My first love.
Mochi_Moves:
Fird love?
I neve r heARd anything abo ut your love life
Didi somethin rly happen to make u
An emo grunge bo y?
Can you ttell me about it??
SUGA:
Not when you’re drunk.
Ask me when you’re sober.
Mochi_Moves:
Ehehhehfdhe
You sitll won t share about yourself :c
I thoght we were best gay pals
I thoufht we got close enough to talk abuot these kind
Of things
SUGA:
Your hangover is gonna be nasty.
How about
I come over in the morning, bring some fire ramen
And tell you about me.
I just don’t want you to forget the conversation.
Mochi_Moves:
Wooooooooooow
minT yoon gi
The sweetest man
Fire ranen sounds
fantatiiiiiiifc
SUGA:
You bet your ass I’m the sweetest man
I’ll fuck up anyone who says otherwise.
Mochi_Moves:
Sweet as suga r
c:
SUGA:
Damn right i am
Mochi_Moves:
<3/
Chat With The.V.Zone
2015.11.29
15:00
The.V.Zone:
Lstn Yoongz
I saw your notebook
SUGA:
I figured you weren’t above snooping in my shit
Trying to figure me out
Or whatever.
The.V.Zone:
I was nvr a fan of you in the first place
Ill b honest
SUGA:
Understandable.
I used to find you unbearably obnoxious
The.V.Zone
I don’’t kno what my Chim has goin on in his head
But he’s all ovr u these days
And im gttn weird vibes
I dnt feel comfortable with this situation
Bck off a little
Chim is a sensitive soul
I don’t want any1 hurting him
SUGA:
Just curious, but what did you read
The.V.Zone
Smthn abt ur first love
SUGA:
Ah.
That’s uh,
I wrote that about my piano
The.V.Zone
Wut.
SUGA:
Look, my family situation was kinda
Eh
It wasn’t great
So I played piano and wrote music
And well
I fell in love with it.
I think it’s the only thing I’ve ever loved.
The.V.Zone:
…
weLL WHY DIDNT U JUST SAY SO
LOOK @ U
A SOFT EMO BOY FALLIN IN LUV
WITH A
PIANo
Wow u r so gay
SUGA:
My name is literally sugar, why are you all
so surprised to find out i’m nice?
The.V.Zone:
U always look rly grumpy
Like ur ready 2 kill someone
I dnt want my Chim around a murderer
SUGA:
It’s call resting bitch face and I’m sorry it
bothers you.
Jimin is a dear friend to me. I would never
do anything to hurt him.
The.V.Zone:
Well
If u say so
THEN BY ALL MEANS FEEL FREE 2 CUM OVR ANYTIME
But im not kiddin bout backing off
Chims mine
Furever
SUGA:
Wait, are you harbouring romantic
feelings for Jimin?
The.V.Zone:
Am i
Am i harborinfdsf
LMMAAAAAAAAOO
Ohmyg o d
Hyung
Ur so funny
Im crying
Oh dear god no
Im happily taken
But ty for ur concern
SUGA:
See, we don’t talk so I don’t know these
things about you.
Don’t worry
You still and will forever remain Jimin’s #1
The.V.Zone:
Good
But wait
What abt u
R u harboring feelings for my Chim??
SUGA:
…
I liked it better when we weren’t talking
The.V.Zone
Oh
O h
OH
I liked it better when we weren’t talking too.
BUT 2 LATE 4 THAT
SPILL THE JUICES
I WONT TELL I PROMISE
SUGA:
Every single fiber of my being tells me that
that is a lie
The.V.Zone:
:)
U dont kno me
SUGA:
Yeah that’s the problem
The.V.Zone:
Okay
Rmbr Jimin’s recent performance?
U 2 sick with the flu
And cldnt go
SUGA:
:/ I still feel bad about that.
He was so excited for me to watch.
The.V.Zone
Well
I hve pics
V good pics
If u tell me ill send them 2 u
U wont regret
:) :)
SUGA:
You know, I might have misjudged you, Kim Taehyung.
I apologize for that.
The.V.Zone:
U r forgiven
SUGA:
Well. I haven’t told anyone this
but
I have
emotions
regarding a certain person
named
Park Jimin.
The.V.Zone:
*sigh*
Some1 in luv
With my Chim
SUGA:
You throw the word “love” out so easily
I’ve only known him personally for like 2 weeks
The.V.Zone:
Gr8 point
Thats why ur perfct 4 him
An intellectual
I’ll deliver what i promised
Cherish these with ur lyfe
Regrettin that flu yet?
SUGA:
Holy shit
I’m gay
#fly me to the moon#collab#fic#au#yoonmin#fluff#fluffy crack#jimin#yoongi#bts#bts imagine#bts scenarios#bts fanfic#bangtan boys#bangtan fanfic#bangtan sonyeondan#bts au#yoonmin au#personal
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Text
All Decked Out Like a Cowboy's Dream
[Part of the Blue-Eyed Jack ‘Verse]
CW: food mentions, homophobia mentions, being publicly out
When Jack and Bitty started publicly dating, the internet, well...the internet broke, just a little.
Though they were only known in their respective circles -- most of Bitty’s colleagues hadn’t heard of Jack and vice versa -- it was a big deal. Bitty was suddenly hailed as the “gay Carrie Underwood” and Jack had to order a moratorium on all jokes about his sexy “tractor.” They got the usual “keep your private life private” criticism from the AFA people (“Would that I could, y’all.”) and some nasty remarks from sports commentators, but it wasn’t as if either of them was coming out for the first time.
Mostly they both just had to suffer through the Blue-Eyed Jack memes. It seemed a fair price to pay for being able to date openly.
They’d only been dating a few months when Bitty approached Jack with a nervous, hopeful smile. They were in Vancouver on a short vacation together, walking hand-in-hand through the Granville Island market, pointing at the seagulls stealing food and laughing. They’d wandered down away from the market proper to a boat dock, and Jack read out the silliest boat names to Bitty in a straight-faced monotone. If he were being honest with himself, Bitty hadn’t laughed like this in a long time, even with all the time he spent with his goofy band. Jack was special, and Bitty was very, very lucky.
“So, I, uh, wanted to run something by you,” Bitty said as they fell into a comfortable silence. “You’re not busy on June 15th, are you?”
Jack raised an eyebrow. The Falcs had been knocked out of playoffs in the first round, hence the vacation -- Jack had needed to get far away and Bitty had needed to comfort his boyfriend in person. “I don’t have anything planned. Why?”
“Well, um…” Bitty scuffed his toe against the sidewalk. “That’s the night of the CMT Music Awards. I have a plus-one, was thinkin’ of reaching out to Troye Sivan to be my date, back before you. But, um...I know you don’t like public events…”
“Bits.” Jack squeezed his hand tighter and grinned. “I’d love to be your plus-one.”
“Really?” Bitty let out a deep sigh and leaned up against Jack’s arm. “That’s...I’m happy.”
“I’ve never been to Nashville outside of playing the Preds,” Jack said. “You’ll have to show me the sights.”
Bitty laughed, feeling a million times lighter. “Oh, yeah, I can show you all the crappy dives I used to play at. Oh! And the diner where I used to wash dishes. The fry cook there let me help him, sometimes, on slow nights. He even admitted my flapjacks were better than his.” Bitty sighed, swinging Jack’s arm up and around his shoulder so he could tuck himself in against his boyfriend. “As soon as I hit my break, I sent him money for his daughter’s school supplies. I sent money to every bar owner in the city who gave me a chance, too, and the blues band that found me on the streets that first week and gave me a couch to crash on. There are a lot of snakes in Nashville,” he continued, voice growing softer. “But if it hadn’t been for the good people, I don’t even know if I would’ve survived. I try to visit them all, every time I’m in town. Gotta remember your roots,” he added with a laugh. “When interviewers ask about my family, I tell ‘em that the kind folks of the world are my family, and I’m theirs.”
Jack bent down suddenly to kiss Bitty, soft and sweet. “I don’t know how someone as positive and gracious as you ever agreed to date someone like me,” he said, smile teasing. “But I’m very, very glad.”
“Well, according to TMZ, it’s for your NHL paycheck,” Bitty chirped, slipping his hand into the back pocket of Jack’s jeans. “And this fella here.” He squeezed Jack’s ass, laughing.
Jack snorted and pulled Bitty along the path, back up to the crowded market. “C’mon, I saw a cheese stand inside. I know how you are about fancy cheeses.”
“You get me,” Bitty said, fluttering his eyelashes. “Lead the way, Mr. Zimmermann.”
Despite Bitty renting a perfectly good house with his band, Jack got himself an overpriced suite in a fancy hotel as a treat for the two of them after the awards. Bitty suddenly didn’t care if Bitty & the Biscuits won anything -- he just wanted to spend the evening drinking with his band and then retire to the giant bed with ridiculously soft pillows to spend some alone time with his favorite person.
Unfortunately, that meant his favorite person wasn’t at the house to get ready with Bitty and the rest of the band. Their rented car would swing by the hotel to pick up on the way, but while Jack got to dress and primp in peace, Bitty was running around the house with three other panicked guys plus their dates and several stylists.
Despite his threat to invite Alexei Mashkov to the awards, Ransom had settled on Lardo as his date because he thought their height difference was hilarious and would make for great red carpet photos. Dex, the giant nerd that he was, had flown his grandmother down from Maine to be his plus-one. Chowder was bringing his girlfriend, Caitlin, whose natural Cara Delevingne brows and Target-sale-rack dress put them all to shame.
Bitty himself was dressed in a snazzy sky-blue suit with the top buttons of his shirt undone. His hair was coiffed spectacularly -- “The higher the hair, the closer to God,” he’d joked with his stylist. -- and his shoes were gold and shinier than anything. Bitty looked good and he hoped Us Weekly agreed.
Somehow, they managed to get the whole band and their dates into the small, white limo on time and headed towards the hotel where Jack was waiting. Ransom and Lardo kept chirping him about “seeing the bride before the wedding” or something equally as dumb, but Bitty simply ignored them and texted Jack that they were on their way.
When they pulled up to the taxi circle in front of the hotel, Bitty literally felt his jaw drop. Because there, waiting, in the tightest jeans he’d ever seen and a pair of gosh darn cowboy boots stood his boyfriend and sexiest man alive. His ass was a national treasure when he wore tennis shoes and basketball shorts; when he wore heeled boots and well-tailored jeans? The Zimmer-booty was the eighth modern wonder of the world.
“Well, shit, Bits,” Lardo said, following his gaze. “You hit the Jack-pot.”
Ransom snorted with laughter and Bitty couldn’t even find it in himself to be annoyed. He wondered how rude it would be to skip the awards and drag Jack upstairs to his suite immediately.
The driver came around and opened the door for Jack, and he crawled in with a shy grin. “You look really, really great,” he told Bitty, taking in his blue suit and styled hair. “You’re gonna steal the show.”
Bitty shook his head slowly. “No, I don’t think I am.”
When Jack cocked his head in confusion, Lardo clarified. “You look hot, Jack. You broke Bitty.”
“Really?” Jack looked surprised, then smug. “But it’s so early in the evening.”
The entire limo ooh-ed in dramatically scandalized tones. Even Dex’s grandmother laughed at the insinuation. Ransom elbowed Bitty in the ribs until Bitty smacked his arm hard.
“Shush,” Bitty said as the car began to drive again. “Let’s just discuss this year’s drinking game.”
“Alright,” Dex said, pulling a piece of paper from his pocket. “Take a shot every time someone trips or falls. Take a drink for every cowboy hat you see. Take a sip for every time Carrie Underwood changes her outfit. Oh!” Dex sighed and shoved the paper back into his jacket. “Chug your drink every time someone makes an off-color joke about us.”
“Great,” Ransom said. “We’ll be wasted within an hour.”
“None of them better say anything ugly about you boys,” Grandma Poindexter said crossly. “Else they’ll answer to me.”
“Wow, Dex,” Chowder said. “Your grandma is, like, way cooler than you.”
The boys chirped and fought the entire ride to the awards, leaving Bitty to reign in his overwhelmed little heart in relative peace.
They didn’t win.
Bitty really hadn’t been expecting to, but it stung all the same.
Still -- he’d gotten to take drunk selfies with Kacey Musgraves and Jack had found Mike Fisher pretty quickly, two hockey boys in a sea of country stars. (Bitty could see the headlines already: Hockey Invasion?) There’d only been one tone-deaf gay joke about him, and Willie Nelson had smiled at him as he passed by his table. Dolly came over at one point to hug him tightly and make him promise to spend a day in the studio with her so they could record a duet or two. All in all, it had been a good evening.
And it was about to get better.
Bitty’s drunkenness had faded into a tired sort of buzz by the time he and Jack were dropped off at the hotel. They staggered to the room, giggly and sluggish. Bitty jumped onto the bed and kicked off his shoes, relishing the expensive squishiness of the mattress pad.
“You hungry, bud?” Jack asked, closing the door behind him. He shed his sports jacket, revealing the tight, white t-shirt underneath. Lord, he was the spitting image of the country hunk Bitty had dreamt about as a teenager. It suddenly really didn’t matter that Bitty & the Biscuits had lost -- Bitty had his award right here.
“Starving,” Bitty said, trying to sound suggestive, but the rumbling of his stomach ruined the moment.
Jack pulled out the room service menu, sitting down on the bed next to Bitty. “I could go for a burger. You wanna split a dessert?”
Bitty smiled up at Jack. “I want to make a comment about you being my dessert, but I also really want something smothered in chocolate.”
Jack laughed and pulled Bitty up until he was leaning against his chest. “Cheeseburger and fries for me. A ‘molten lava brownie deluxe’ for dessert. And…?”
“Ooh, fettuccine alfredo,” Bitty said with a happy sigh. “Yes, please.”
“It worries me how much dairy you eat,” Jack said teasingly. “And one giant bowl of cream and carbs, coming right up.”
“Just for that, you’re not getting any,” Bitty said petulantly. “Of either sort.”
Jack laughed and kissed Bitty’s head. “Will you love me again if I take you out for breakfast in the morning?”
“Maybe.” Bitty snuggled in closer, biting lightly at the underside of Jack’s jaw. “Will there be biscuits and gravy?”
“Of course,” Jack said. “To continue your diet of cream and carbs.”
“Chirp, chirp, chirp,” Bitty huffed. “It’s like you don’t want to get laid at all.”
“Bittle,” Jack said seriously, a smile tugging at the corner of his lips. “I saw how you looked at my ass all night. I have no fears about not getting laid.”
Bitty pouted and slapped Jack’s stomach lightly. “I knew I should’ve called Troye,” he said grumpily. “Troye wouldn’t be this rude to me.”
Jack laughed. “Troye’s ass wouldn’t look this good in jeans, either.”
“Ugh, just order the food you narcissist,” Bitty said. “You know the true way to my heart is through my stomach.”
“That I do,” Jack said smugly, leaning down to kiss Bitty again before picking up the phone. “That I do.”
“Love you, Cowboy,” Bitty murmured as Jack dialed the front desk.
“Love you, too,” Jack whispered. “Hello? Yes, I’d like to order room service…”
[READ PART FOUR]
[OMGCP Country Singer AU]
[My writing tag]
[My online novel, The Discourt Knife]
#omgcp country singer au#anna writes things#check please!#omgcp fic#zimbits fanfiction#in the series this is after the original but before the other fics
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