#Godstrials

[mylifestoryishisstory]

Extraordinary

It’s been a while since my last post. But it doesn't mean I stopped writing. Yesterday while waiting for a file to be attached to an email (I have the worst internet connection, by the way), I happened to browse through my notes. And whoaaaalaaa I found something heavy! Here it is.

22.12.2019 8:56PM

Who among you wants to be extraordinary? So here I am, in my room with the lights off streaming a downloaded copy of a worship service. And this was the speaker’s introductory question. Who among you wants to be extraordinary? Without a tinge of hesitation, I found myself raising my hand muttering “Me! Me!”. But as fast as I was able to respond, I also retreated quickly as I reflect on the things that are happening on my life at the moment. Do I have the capability to be extraordinary? I asked myself.

I went on watching and it seems that this clip is listening to my thoughts. The speaker pointed out that no matter who you are, where you are and what your life’s status is, you can be extraordinary because God made us to be one. He cited Genesis 1:26 as proof. And continued with another question: What does it mean to be extraordinary? The answer? It’s found in Romans 8:28-29, to live an extraordinary life, one should become Christ-like.

To be Christ-like is something that is quite hard to do. Especially if things in your life is challenging to the point of you sometimes thinking of giving up, like you just want to live in a hole, get lost in the jungle, to disappear, to just die.

Earlier today, my dad came rushing in my room asking me why my mom’s crying. I don’t know was my answer. I stood up, went to their room and true enough, I found my mom curled up in bed crying. Like always, I don’t know how respond. I had so much drama for months now and today I decided to not give in to more. So I went back to my room and continue what I was doing. Minutes later, my dad went telling me that mom was banging her head against the wall. I stood up and went to their room again. It felt like I was splashed with a bucket of boiling water seeing her like that. I told her to keep on doing it so that our problems will get even worse as if what we have on our plate at the moment is not enough. And “what a great life we have!” with all the sarcasm I can pull off out of anger at what is happening. I stormed back in my room and continued what I was doing.

That wasn’t so Christ-like, I know. But Lord, how on earth should I respond to these things? What’s the right thing to do? What would Jesus do?

How can I be extraordinary? When I have a dad who’s dying of cancer yet has not changed a bit that it seems that making our lives miserable is his main goal in life? A mom who’s been diagnosed with a clot in a part of her brain due to a mild stroke and by now, drop dead tired of caring for my dad? A sister who’s a lazy drunkard with a foul mouth who blames me for everything and sees me as someone with the worst attitude? Another sister who has nothing to do with anyone but herself and keeps on smoking cigarettes even after witnessing what is happening to our dad who is dying of lung cancer from smoking 2 packs of cigarettes a day? When I am so lost, myself? When I’m no longer sure how to proceed with all these things happening?

Lord, how can I be extraordinary for you? How can I better serve you?

#extraordinary #pains #problems #challenges #life #emotions #Godstrials #beingChristlike