#Gonna save this to my drafts and post it when I'm really really really drunk | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

shakingparadigm · 24 days

Note

Btw have you listened to any covers by the alstg VA? Do you have any favorites ? Just got reminded bcs omg new akugetsu cover 😮!

SO FIRST OF ALL, THANK YOU. it's amazing to get this ask actually because just this morning I was drafting a post about the ALNST VAs and how good they are! They're all so talented, and they fit their roles perfectly. I truly couldn't imagine anyone else playing their roles!

Here's a favorite cover/song of mine from each VA!

(Note: These are all just based on my personal preference, and I haven't gone very deep into each VA's discography yet save for a few. These are just the covers that I listen to most frequently! Please forgive my basic ass taste btw)

Russian Roulette (Red Velvet) by Rubyeye (Mizi's VA)!

I'm gonna be honest, I'm a very simple person. Russian Roulette is just a very cute song! And I think it suits Mizi so well, all bright, bubbly and candy sweet (at least in rhythm)!

I love hearing Rubyeye's voice no matter where it is honestly, she's rather versatile! In ALIEN STAGE, Mizi often sings slower ballads (My Clematis), or in her lower, more mature voice (Ruler of My Heart). She sounds absolutely gorgeous of course, but Rubyeye's voice in more energetic songs is such a joy to hear as well!

My second favorite Rubyeye cover is actually the Mizi version of UTTE! Can you tell that I love hearing Rubyeye's more energetic covers. Can you tell yet. I know it's very unpopular, but I love Mizi UTTE so much. The way that she sings is so incredibly charming to me, she has a lot of spunk in this cover! I love how she sang "ain't nobody but!" I honestly love that lyric more in Mizi's version than I do in the original! It holds a lot of character which I adore.

Catch You Catch Me (Cardcaptor Sakura OP) by C!nah (Sua's VA)!

Once again, I am a simple person. I can't resist a cute and sweet cover.

C!nah's light and angelic voice fits so well into this song! It sounds absolutely lovely. Plus I already loved the song beforehand, so I might be a bit biased lol

C!nah's voice in general is so unique. It has such an clear and airy quality to it! They picked such a perfect voice for Sua.

My second favorite C!nah cover is Sua's version of ROMH! I adore how Sua sings like a whisper. Her voice brings such a haunting feel to the song.

LILAC (IU) City Pop Cover by 6FU;

Being honest, my favorite 6FU; song is actually Drunk and Party.

But if we're talking covers, this one might just be my favorite due to how shocked I was upon listening to it.

Hyuna has a very energetic and rough voice, with such a strong and unique tone. I was expecting it when clicking on this cover, which was why I was pleasantly surprised to hear a much smoother, calmer voice.

And it's beautiful! I haven't listened to much from 6FU; yet, so I might find some new favorites once I do. For now, I'll keep listening to this cover over and over again.

Sweet Dream (Luka Version) by BL8M (Luka's VA)!

OKAY I know this already an Alien Stage song. I don't know if it counts but I'm putting here anyway because GOD.

THE TONE AND TEXTURE OF HIS VOICE. I'M IN AWE.

Was absolutely floored listening to this for the first time. I actually ascended

BL8M is actually one of the songwriters for ALIEN STAGE, and he sang the demo for this song!

You can really hear his expertise. He owns this song.

My "the worst person you know has the voice of an angel" post was literally about this I was going insane

THE WAY HE SANG THE PRECHORUS. THE "save me please" OUHHH...

They couldn't have picked anyone better for Luka. He literally kills every song he sings.

유우리(優里) - 베텔기우스(ベテルギウス) by PARK BYEONG HOON (Ivan's VA)!

PBH's wonderfully rich and deep voice. What a blessing.

I love how soft he sounds in the beginning of most of his covers, slowly growing in intensity until he's fully expressing the song.

The ranges he uses in this cover are so nice to listen to. I love the switching between his deeper lower voice and his soft higher voice.

Thinking about Ivan's voice in CURE and how it's probably going to sound more anguished and desperate than this makes me sick btw.

Anyways please listen to this cover he deserves the support.

Um. My other favorite PBH cover is umm. uh. The short clip of a MANIAC (Stray Kids) cover he posted on Twitter.

GUYS DID YOU FUCKING HEAR THAT ONE. CAN WE PLEASE TALK ABOUT IT??!!! HIS VOICE. THE BASS. FUCK.

I actually went insane. Finally got to hear Ivan's lower, rougher voice and I was shocked to my core. Life changing.

Cistus (KOUSEI) by AKUGETSU (Till's VA)!

HERE WE ARE. MY FAVORITE.

So this technically isn't a cover. It's an original song that AKUGETSU sang vocals for. Sorry. I'm just so obsessed I needed to share it.

IT'S SOOO FUCKING GOOD. SERIOUSLY.

Of all the ALNST VA's I've probably listened to AKUGETSU the most (sorry. Till bias) and this song is still probably one of my absolute favorites from him.

JUST LISTEN TO IT. The guitar in the intro. The quieter vocals in the first verse that build up to a BURST of sound in the chorus. The way he enunciates everything is perfect.

AKUGETSU is such a seasoned singer. He really knows how to work his voice and knock a song out of the park. It's genuinely addicting.

This song is such a fucking banger. Till would sing this. GOD IM SO OBSESSED WITH THIS SONG.

Another absolute banger from AKUGETSU is his cover of I'm Invincible (Ado)! I love the way his voice moves, going high and low in the same line. He's such a dynamic singer.

I adore how AKUGETSU brings an energetic rock vibe to every song he sings. His voice is such a standout.

Sorry for the long ass answer! I love all the ALNST VAs and I really hope they continue to flourish! Thank you for giving me the opportunity to talk about them 🙏

#alnst #alien stage #alien stage vas #alien stage till #alien stage mizi #alien stage sua #alien stage luka #alien stage ivan #alien stage hyuna #asks

32 notes · View notes

galaxae · 9 months

Note

hi adrian :3 🔎📄and 🤬 for the ask game mwah ily

mwahhh ly2 thankyou for the ask for real

(my lovely mutual green is referencing this post here)

🔍Give a clue (a picture, emoji, a word, etc) and let your followers guess what a WIP is about.

hmm which wip to do... ok no i got it i'm gonna do a quote. the quote is not actually in the story but it's a shorthand thematic description i use

"never give nukes to a teenager"

🤬Is there a WIP that you hate?

i don't really *hate* any of my creations. they're all very special to me! that said, honestly, the one i like the least right now is my short story "one good day" about a lesbian supervillain, her backstory, and her "redemption" if you want to call it that. i havent touched that story in a while because i wrote it when i was in a very dark place (last october-ish?) and my writing class' reaction to it was mixed, which makes sense obviously it's a first draft, but i was still hurt bc i was in a sensitive spot emotionally. my professor really liked my revisions of it for the end of the semester, but still. i'll return to it when i've healed more from my parents' bullshit, maybe. that story very much explores a toxic, complicated parent-child relationship in depth and idk how much i can handle that right now!

📝Share a snippet of an unposted WIP, with or without context.

oh naur not this one....... i suppose i will tho. putting this one last so i can do a readmore. enjoy

There’s a name that haunts me. Azalea.

I heard it once, years ago, while my dad was talking about a family friend. That name has lingered like a ghost behind me ever since. Sometimes, it tugs on my shoulders, or says something in my ear that I can’t make out, or clings to my back like a desperate child. I’ll be in the middle of something — a meeting at work, a drawing, my boss calling me into his office — something important, something I need to give my full attention — and I struggle, already, with paying attention to things — and Azalea makes it worse. Azalea, Azalea, Azalea.

The same name as a genus of flowers, or the common name for that genus, at least, because Rhododendron is more likely to make your eyes glaze over when you read it. That one wouldn’t make a great human name. They’re pretty, used widely in decorations for people’s lawns, so much so that it’s hard to find info about how they actually originated and evolved, or what purpose they serve in the natural environment, separate from humans. And insects thrive in their presence. But they are toxic, highly toxic for humans. Even for frogs, too. Dangerous, angry, and deadly, but still so beloved by everyone, somehow.

I don’t even remember anything about the family friend my dad mentioned. He hasn’t brought her up in years. But Azalea, not the person, but the name, she is still there. Pulling at my hair from behind, shaking me awake from a drunk stupor, poking and prodding me. I wanted her to go away at first. I don’t know why she’s there or what she wants from me. But she’s around, either way. She has been for years, maybe a decade or longer. I’ve grown accustomed to it.

The last thing I remember is this. A white blur in front of my windshield. A steering wheel in my hand, shifting of its own accord, its cold fake leather running through my palms. A skid. A voice, possibly mine, saying, “Oh god!” A loud crack. Then, silence. Silence, save for Azalea’s frantic whispers.

And now I'm here.

This is some imitation of the bedroom of my childhood. The one I stay in now, too, of course — I'm not going to deny that I moved back in with my dad. But this one looks like it did when I was young: a mattress that could soak me up like a towel on a spill if I wanted it to. A stripe of frog and swamp wallpaper across the wall opposite me, surrounded by those animal fun fact posters, with a few comic posters scattered through those. A tall dresser in the corner, the old one my dad grabbed from a yard sale, that looks like it survived an apocalypse or something.

I sit up. I try to sit up. My hands feel like static. When they push me up, everything blurs.

I really miss that frog wallpaper.

My sight evens out pretty quickly. Looking at the posters again, now that my eyes are more on their level, they look torn. Some corners are missing. The words on them are made of symbols I don't recognize, maybe another language, maybe Samoan. I know that’s the language of half of my blood. Does Samoan use different symbols than English? I don't actually know. I kind of wish I did.

The posters switch places with each other. They cover and uncover the frogs. There are more of the posters and then less of them. My head hurts all of a sudden.

My nightstand, down and to my left, could be a saving grace, something that doesn't hurt to look at. That plain, dark wood, with the alarm clock on it that didn't work (my dad always had to wake me up himself, even when I was a teenager). Usually it was covered in pencils, sticky notes full of my sketches, empty wrappers, dirty plates, the original nightstand mostly obscured. When I look this time, the only thing atop it is a piece of paper. I reach for it.

Dear Carter Gaumond,

We regret to inform you that as of Monday, October 28, you will no longer be employed wi

The paper dissolves in my hands. Crumbling to dust. That poor stranger. This guy got fired.

Oh, no. Hold on. That guy is me. That's my name.

I'd almost forgotten.

That was four months ago, I think, this letter in the mail. And now I'm here, wherever I am. Feeling like I'm about to throw up.

i'd love to give context if anyone wants it but that right there is a revision of my novel's first draft that i wrote in 2020, unsure if or when i will publish it but yknow, it's there

#adrian posts #ocs tag

4 notes · View notes

weebsinstash · 4 years

Note

Not that I'm starved for your content or anything but maybe you could post your oldest drafts as they are? Kind of like just extended scenarios. If you have 60 then your oldest one must have been done a while ago or do you write them up that quickly??

So I guess I'm gonna kind of ramble to answer this just because it's kind of a multipart question:

-sometimes I write quickly but uh no, some of these drafts are like. God. Some are literally over a year old

-idk if it was an issue with the model of phone I had having its software become outdated (was using the same phone for like 3 years, recently replaced it) or tumblr mobile but, I often start jotting down ideas or WIPs for fics by saving them as tumblr drafts, since its easier to just open up my phone then like go through the ordeal of booting up my shitty laptop. Quite some time ago (around 3 years ) I noticed that when the drafts became too long, editing them on tumblr switched everything to HTML mode and I would be forced to physically type in html bullshit every time I so much as wanted to paragraph space, so I began just having the same story having multiple small drafts to avoid that bullshit and also because sometimes tumblr just glitches and my draft gets lost so keeping them small and saving occasionally is like a failsafe

-tldr for that bullet point: that number of 60 drafts is inflated by the fact that some stories are just in multiple pieces

-there is a large variety of shit though like it's not like I have only 3 things in here, i have idk at least 20 different ideas maybe at least, i havent gone through them recently enough

-sometimes I'm drunk or stoned or god forbid sober and the scene I have in my head or maybe even a particular sentence sounds really really good and I want to write it down in case I want to use it. OR I'm thinking if the scene in such great detail that I wanna get it all down before I forget. So some of these drafts can be super short or not even have a full story or anything, I was just like "hey that sounds neat jot it down"

- i bounce around between ideas a lot and I'm really impulsive and some of this shit will probably never be finished

But anyways, to answer the big overarching question I guess, while I was answering this ask I got the idea that, hey, for some of them, they're long enough that I could do the whole chapter upload thing? Just upload a bunch of first chapters and work on them over time? But if I upload too many drafts at once I would probably just get overwhelmed so.... i dunno. I guess i need to ask myself which of these I actually plan to post and which ones I'm just kind of hanging onto because even if I'm not interested anymore it just jund of sucks to give up and throw out your hard work :(

#in other news of certain numbers getting high i gotta purge some of these asks there are literally 100 #and its becoming a little overwhelming lol. feel free to re ask things if you think something was thrown out #but for now i gotta clean up some because it deters me from answering asks at all #which is not you guys fault im just real anxious and finicky and let them all pile up

14 notes · View notes

mymusicalitylove · 4 years

Text

Dive

In my feels. Trying to be productive and direct them in a positive way.

The other night I feel like I broke because the latest disappointment (that I created for myself), came to the surface. I took a hot shower, cried and told myself to let it all go. Hardest I have cried in a long time because I replayed a lot of scenarios about this endless loop I seem to be stuck in: I give up on this notion called ‘love’, discard it and begin to focus elsewhere.. then along comes another unsuspecting fool that says all the right things to get me twitterpated and caught up in the fantasies my brain creates. I get sucked in and think, ok, maybe this will go somewhere.. just to BAM! Slam my face into a wall of unending disappointment. Wash, rinse, repeat. It feels as though this scene has been on replay about eleventeen times over these last few years, and all I can say is: How. Fucking. Stupid (Who is the REAL fool? Ya, that’s me).

I went to bed after my therapeutic shower and slept ok, but kept waking up. I finally decided to get up and be productive, and had Ed Sheeran’s “Dive” stuck in my head. Hadn’t heard it in a while so I’m not sure where it came from, but it stayed with me the entire morning.

My entries on this thing almost always relate to music and how the lyrics relate to my life. I’ve saved some drafts with songs I’ve wanted to write about later. When I realized I wasn’t going back to sleep, I decided to write; I checked my drafts and whoa.. “Dive” was already on there.. I don’t even remember saving it.

(Despite there being a few too many typos for my taste in this post above, I feel it, Rising Woman!)

September 2019 is the most notable time I can remember starting the self-destructive cycle. My boss left at work and I decided I needed to do something to change my life up. I put all my energy into planning my amazing sabbatical in Italy. Everything was set up; all the wheels were in motion for me to see Europe, do me selfishly, and not worry about shit! In my mind I put together plans of sightseeing, concerts, volunteering, gymming, wandering, and getting lost in the country I fell in love with a year prior.

In October on a night out with friends, I met an EMT at a bar. He worked his bullshit game, and did it well because he was intriguing. He made me feel good over a two hour convo that honestly felt like a first date, and convinced me to give him the digits (which I don’t freely give to strangers). Too bad the man never called. Womp, womp.

After a taste of those vibes I craved that “feeling” again. I tried a dating app again for a couple months. In a comical turn of events, said dating app matched me with this same EMT! This presented me with the opportunity to call his ass out, and incidentally feel validated as to why it actually was better he never called. Talked to a few other guys on the app, but really can only report on a couple stupid funny anecdotes of just how sad it is that guys don’t know how to talk to women anymore. At least this time I wasn’t taking it seriously and only did it for shits and giggles. Decided okay, just keep focusing on plans for Italy, stacking that paper, and looking forward to the new year (*point and laugh at the idiot who had no idea what 2020 had in store!*).

In January a boy (with a girlfriend) who I’d had innocent flirtation vibes with for a while tells me he’s now single. I had already placed him in the “not gonna happen” folder, and his confession obviously began a different wave of chemistry and banter for months. We had a conversation about the reality of where I am/what I’m ready for, and where he’s at/what he’s not ready for. Oh, and in the midst of all this, Covid hits and I have to make the heartbreaking decision to cancel Italy and deal with the feels of defeat that followed. And let’s also add all the sadness of being stuck with only me, myself and my thoughts in quarantine.

One last convo in April with “previously not gonna happen” sealed the deal of this endless string of flirtation not going anywhere and back in that folder he went. I then decided to give my number to this other guy who had shown interest a while back (but I hadn’t paid him any mind cuz I was stuck on folder guy). New dude didn’t really engage, so I disregarded him again, and worked on rearranging my place, organizing, decorating, spring cleaning and purging. Fast forward to now, it’s June and new dude comes back to work, asks to hang out, we have a great first “date” lasting three hours, and now here I am less than two weeks later wondering what happened. New dude: MIA / Me: WTF?

I truly do not understand why this cycle continues. Each time I feel like I get closer to something real, just to be lead into feeling like a fucking moron. I can’t stand it anymore, and it honestly makes me want to go back to being guarded and jaded, but I know that’s not the right way to find anyone. So I open up and allow some level of vulnerability, even though I’m scared af cuz of how hard I fell five years ago with the man I thought I was going to marry.

This is gonna hurt, but I blame myself first

'Cause I ignored the truth

Drunk off that love, my head up

There's no forgetting you

You've awoken me, but you're choking me

I was so obsessed

It was a matter of time

But you are the fire, I'm gasoline

Gave you all of me, and now honestly, I got nothing left

'Cause I loved you dangerously

More than the air that I breathe

Knew we would crash at the speed that we were going

Didn't care if the explosion ruined me

Baby, I loved you dangerously

I learned a lot from that short but impactful relationship. It was the love of my life and I went into it with complete abandon. I loved him dangerously. Things felt “right” and escalated quickly, which lead to our demise because we did not explore all the things before going full force into a relationship. We mutually thought this was “it” and talked about the future we would have. It completely broke me to end things, and upon rebuilding the pieces of me, I promised myself I would never rush into things like that again.

I know that I do it to myself, but I guess I don’t know how else to do it. If I’m closed off and guarded, I’m not welcoming anything in; if I’m open and vulnerable, I start to dream in fantasyland with expectations just to be let down and end up inevitably disappointed. I clearly don’t know how to find the balance that works and it has become maddening beyond words.

I need to find that balance, and it would be a lot easier to find in non-Covid times where I could have something else to focus my precious energy on, rather than wanting to find “my person”.

Maybe I came on too strong

Maybe I waited too long

Maybe I played my cards wrong

Oh, just a little bit wrong

Baby I apologize for it

I could fall or I could fly here in your aeroplane

And I could live, I could die

Hanging on the words you say

And I've been known to give my all

And jumping in harder than ten thousand rocks on the lake

So don't call me baby unless you mean it

Don't tell me you need me if you don't believe it

So let me know the truth

Before I dive right into you

And I've been known to give my all

And lie awake, everyday don't know how much I can take

I could fall, or I could fly here in your aeroplane

And I could live, I could die

Hanging on the words you say

And I've been known to give my all

Sitting back, looking at every mess that I made

This new dude made me really feel this. I tend to fall, and fall hard because I am so ready to give my heart to someone. But I need to put on the brakes and slow my damn roll.

I can’t keep getting my hopes up. That is ultimately my problem. I tell myself to not have expectations and I do well to begin with, then have an amazing connection and am fed (what is obviously) bullshit and fall for it like a moron. I have grown thicker skin this time around, so at least there’s that.. but hopefully this has been my last lesson.

I have found a new diversion for my focus and just put in my first offer for a new home! This will be my new passion project and will take up my thoughts and energies for a while, so as freaked tfo as I am, I am equally excited for this new venture. If it’s meant to be, it will be, and if it’s not, my new little home is out there somewhere not ready for me yet.

06/19/2020 - 11:51 PM

0 notes