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#HERE GOES MY 1000TH POST
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Do I know that the og post about my LO rewrite didn’t get much traction?yes.
Do I still want to talk about it?absolutely.
So here’s Demeter,Hecate,and Hermes.
Also the au is now named “Persie’s little punishment”
Demeter:
Last post I said that perse and Plutus were twins.that has changed and plutus is now older than Persephone,with her having a somewhat re-written version of her original birth.
Long story short:
Asphodels(along with other flowers associated with death) cannot make flowers nymphs,however,one day Demeter realized that there was some life inside of the asphodels(to be exact,a 1000th of life),sitting lightly and waiting to be harvested.
For years she carefully replanted the asphodels in her garden,until she finally had all 1000 of the special asphodels,doing a ritual to create a flower nymph out of these to finally create the life inside the flowers.
But this wasn’t a flower nymph,no,it was a goddess.
And that’s how Persephone,goddess of the flora,was made!
As said last post,her flower symbolism is the day lily,because of their association and also because I saw on Wikipedia that they were linked with asphodels.
She raised Persephone to be as hard working as Can be,to the point where by the time of the AoW she’s basically as much of a businesswoman as her mother.
She doesn’t know about the AoW,or the community service due to Erie snatching the letter where perse explained everything.
The pin she gave Persephone was NOT worthless(at least not to perse).
Almost never goes to Olympus due to all the crap that happens up there.
A year after perse first joins the underworld staff for the community service,Demeter storms through the door,demanding to see her daughter.
After a quick explanation,perse realizes that that due to eating six pomegranate seeds,she needs to stay there half the year,leading to the agreement with hades and Demeter.(she would have done something like this either way due to the fact shes basically become a pillar of the underworld during her time there,even though the other pillars could hold their own)
It’s an easy agreement,during the summer there are almost no deaths compared to winter,where they have perse to help.
And so become the seasons,with Persephone and hades marrying,Demeter getting to see her daughter half the year,and underworld corp. having perse,hades opening up to his family after leuce,and everyone having a good agreement,it’s a win win.
Hécate:
Perse best friend in the underworld.
Doesn’t really do much in the underworld other than hang around and occasionally help with stuff.
The only person who wasn’t at least skeptical of perse when she first joined.
Can sense Peres’s connection to asphodels.
In this au,Elysium already exist and perse creates asphodel instead.
She,Thanatos,and Hermes are the main people helping.
Their plan ends up succeeding and asphodel is now an oficial part of the underworld,Persephone actually saying that it was hades idea instead of hers,and he was just too busy to help them.
Then queue perse and hades fighting on who should get the most credit:hades wants Persephone to take all of it while she wants hades to have a better rep amongst shades.
Hécate is much,much,much older than both hades and Persephone.(if only she acted it)
she ends up as one of the most hardworking employees due to Persephone’s influence,using her magic to fasten everything.
Her flowers are cow parsley.
Hermes:
He was originally hired to pick up any slack the keres and Thanatos left,but Hermes being Hermes ended up the most productive of the death guys/gals.
Idk what his flower is gonna be.
The only one who can keep up with the work ethic Hermes set is perse,so they become friends.
He’s pretty overworked and gets burned out fairly often,and in those cases he goes to the underworld because he knows people in Olympus won’t notice/care.
Has a somewhat strained relationship with hades after the death of leuce.
His family at Olympus don’t respect his job as a psychopomp.
May or may not have a little thing for Thanatos.
Gets injured on the job pretty often but knows how to lie the pain away,otherwise his productivity would be cut in half and people would be mad their stuff wouldn’t be delivered right away,so he just ignores how much some injuries hurt so that he can do his job.(the only one who actually notices is Demeter because she’s amazing,routinely pointing out the injuries on his body,but he always manages to slip away before she can question him too much)
On the note of Olympus,I feel like it’s a very “everyone is disfuncional in their own right” thing.idk I’ll elaborate more on it if I make a post on the rest of the olympians.
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peaachietea · 3 months
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a little recap of my weekend..
i went to megacon! even though joseph quinn didn’t go, i meet some other people i’ve been wanting to be meet for a very while now! also overall the con was awesome and definitely a lot better than last year!
be warned it is a little of a long post 😬
on friday, i finally meet jeff ward who plays buggy in the one piece live action! i have one thing to say about this man… HE IS THE SWEETEST SWEETHEART TO EVER WALK THIS EARTH. his laugh is so contagious and honestly i could have spent hours talking to him! he is so engaging and kind💛 jeff ward is literally the best!!
i also got to see a lot of cool artist on friday and got a few commissions done which i adore💛 
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on saturday, i finally got to meet paul bettany who plays vision in the mcu! he also is so kind and i got him to sign my wandavision special edition wandavision box. i asked him to draw a heart with a v in it like they do on wandavision and he deadass said to me “that’s what they did??” which made me laugh because HOW DID THEY NOT TELL HIM VISION BOUGHT THAT PLOT FOR WANDA AND HIM 😂 i also brought up how much i want to see vision back in the mcu and how much i love vision and he winked and smiled at me about it and then later saturday night it was confirmed that vision was gonna be coming back! im glad i was the first to know about it 🥰
i also meet jason lee who plays earl hickey from my name is earl and i know what your thinking.. you watch that show??? yes, yes i do! it one of my all time favorite shows and im currently on my rewatch of it for like the 1000th time and i just have to say that jason lee is a really down to earth man. he is literally just vibing and having a good time. we talked and i told him how much i love him as earl and how much i watch the show and even at one point he chuckled and kept repeating “damn it randy!” and then i cried because i think i’ve been waiting so long to meet him and then luckily my mom was with me because she reminded me to show him the picture my boss made of us (she bought me is autograph and photoshopped him and me together) and he loved it and signed it for me just because he loved it so much!
now for sunday, this was more of a chill day but was also very stressful because con going for more than one day gets very very exhausting. i was definitely not feeling it. i would have definitely said screw it if it weren’t for tom hiddlestons panel i bought tickets for. let me just say how incredibly lucky i was to go to that panel because i will cherish it forever. just being able to see him sit and talk about loki and himself was amazing and seeing all the people that also love him was amazing. he is so sweet and kind and said so really insightful things! i wish i could have meet him face to face but 10000000% if he goes next year… im spending ever penny to meet him.
here is a little clip from the panel💛
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basileus · 1 month
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SEATTLE KRAKEN PLAYER PRIMER
I promised the beautiful @madroxed a Seattle Kraken current player primer so she can get into a West Coast (best coast) NHL team and then I went mad so it ended up too long for ask box without a read more. So here it is for your enjoyment, babe. 🦑
IMPORTANT THINGS TO KNOW:
1. When Kraken started playing their first season in 2021, there was a lot of discussion about the expansion plan, how many years they would take to become as successful as other expansion teams (cough VGK). That plan… has not fully panned out. So even though they made it to the playoffs last year, they're not super successful this season and likely won't squeeze their way into a wild card spot. This is okay because the Kraken are full of love.
2. This is important enough to say twice: THE KRAKEN PLAYERS ARE FULL OF LOVE. They don't need to be good if they're having fun and being friends! And they are!
3. Kraken has no captain right now, just four As. Democracy, baby! Every game there is tons of talk on reddit about how it's a good thing because it's made the guys closer, or how it's a bad thing because they don't have a leader and they keep losing. IDK, it's just our thing. There will be a C eventually.
4. There's a joke on tiktok that Kraken is a team of beautiful shy horses, treated badly on their last teams and now learning to love again. Keep this in mind when you see them interacting with Coach Hakstol. They all deserve to have their hooves (skates) farrier-ed gently, ribbons braided into their manes and to be tenderly fed sugar cubes. Anyways.
5. Haha, Seattle runs on love and tentacles.
THE OLDIES:
- Jordan Eberle (Jordy, Ebby, Ebs, Ebber) - Ebs was MY MAN for the longest time because I was soooo fond of him and the mid aughts pre-McDavid Oiler rookie crew. Now he's 33 years old, everyone calls him dad, and just had his 1000th game ceremony. It makes me verklempt.
He just signed a 2-yr contract this month, which people agree is mostly because of his role on the team and less because of his points (which are just okay).
He is also a noted Nickleback fan :(
Also, Jordan Eberle... naked... singing.
- Jared McCann (Canner, also Jordan's on-ice wife) - Kraken's lead scorer right now. Has the saddest backstory ever (he's had troubles with his teams since draft) but the Kraken team loves him. I love him too. Jordan was in his wedding party! Fun fact: Canner is the one who KISSED Ebs' head after an OT win this year, the organization framed & posted the picture, and it's the most romantic thing that has ever happened on Kraken ice. Recognized PC gamer boy. He also wears really really ugly hats with his game day suits.
- Philipp Grubauer (Grubi, The German Gentleman) - Gruuuuu. The more experienced goalie on the team. Noted horse girl (loves horses, there's a video all about his volunteer efforts with them). Gets a lot of undeserved shit from dude fans for being a conservative goalie, the man is NOT gonna move. He straight up close lined a player yesterday because they got too close to his crease lol.
- Vince Dunn - You already know this guy. Feral, but also submissive and breedable. I sent you the "screaming with a bloody face" vid but here's one where he drop gloves for a Matty hit and another from Juniors where he fights OFF ICE. His nickname is Dunner but because he's a pretty princess, he also goes by "Vincess" in hrpf. He's very popular this season both for his looks and his performance this season. Unfortunately injured right now due to a bad hit. Noted "gamer (fornite) boy" lol.
- Adam Larsson - You also know this guy. Big Cat. Quiet but a leader to the D rookies. Surprisingly funny - he's a silent prankster and the custom t-shirts this season with his face on it were a hit. Outside the hrpf space, he's engaged to a beautiful blonde Swede and about to be a dad this month.
- Jaden Schwartz (Schwartzy) - Peak millennial. Is it wrong that I think Schwartzy is the hottest Kraken after Vince? Because I don't care. He gives hot dad, with two dogs with girl names.
He changed his hockey number to match his sister's who died of cancer :'( Has been injured a lot this season and we miss him :'(
- Yanni Gourde (Gourdo) - FERAL!! FRENCH (CANADIAN)!!!! A tiktok star, sassy, charming, and also part of the team leadership.
Married and dad to little girls, who he has allowed Matty to babysit, if you can believe it. There was a super cute vid of them at the pumpkin patch this year. I'm a proud member of the GOURDO IS HOT club but even people with bad eyes and no love for goofy faces love Yanni.
- Andre Burakovsky (Burky) - You might remember him from his Cap or Av days. He's a beautiful little bird who is so good at scoring but so broken. The man has two Stanley Cups but he's played like 2 games for Kraken where he was both healthy & productive lol. People ship him with Gru sometimes in hrpf because they have cute nicknames for each other and also vacation together. He also just had a baby like two months ago so my sisters and I call him a teen mom even though he's like 29, lmaoo.
- Pierre-Edouard Bellemare (Belly) - His shirt is always off in every video I have ever seen him in. Handsome. Beard. French, like literally from France, but we won't hold it against him. He's an older guy who was brought in to help the team with offense (which we badly need).
- Oliver Bjorkstrand (Bjorky) - I always describe Bjorky as like a less handsome Dylan O'Brien if he played hockey. A chill, smiley dude who cares a lot. He played in Portland for the Winterhawks back in Juniors and I saw him a lot there! He's playing super well this year, he even was at the ASG!
THE YOUNG ONES:
- Matty Beniers (Matty, Benny) - OUR BEAUTIFUL FIRST DRAFT EVER. A baby boy. Ebs and Canner are his mom and dad. If you're on tiktok, he made that viral "Yes, Yes, Nope, Nope" sound while mic'd up.
He's growing up :') but also is having kind of a bad season :'( Part of the planned growth of the Kraken team though!
- Will Borgen (Borgy) - One of the baby D. He kinda looks like Canner but more frog. Matty and Borgy are roommates & pretty much BEST FRIENDS during the season. There's a lot of good locker room videos of them giving each other shit. He has also bullied Karts lol. Self describes himself as a little deer.
- Joey Daccord (Joey, Dacs) - Baby goalie. Gives the F1 recaps on tiktok. One of the biggest joys of my year so far was chanting "Joey" in the crowd after his shutout in the Winter Classic. Sometimes he strays too far from the net and makes boo boos. We love & cherish him.
- Kailer Yamamoto (Yamo, Yams, Yammer) - Little man. So little. Great at shootouts & stealing teammate's jerseys. He's the only Washingtonian on the team. Was a Oilers rookie and I've heard he featured in the whole Draisital hrpf narrative thing (idk I'm not an Oilers fan rn lol). Has a terrible goatee right now.
There's a funny af tweet about a reporter seeing a huge cheering section for him at a game and assumed it was friends & family but went over and it was just random people rooting for Yamo purely because he's short.
- Ryker Evans - The newest baby D. Has the deadest eyes you will ever see but he also spent an entire Firebirds youtube interview series just hanging out in a child's pool. He's played great since being called up from the Firebirds and we love him. So new he doesn't have a Breaking the Ice sheet yet :( Also his middle name is GARTH!
- Tye Kartye (Karts) - It's important that you know his last name is pronounced like "Cart-che" but even the announcers say "Car-ti-eh" like the jewelry brand. A quiet-ish sweetheart but also kind of spicy while playing. Rooms with Ryker. They're flirty and have been since the Firebirds. Scored his first NHL goal in his first NHL game, during the Kraken's first ever playoffs!
- Cale (& Haydn) Fleury - REAL LIFE BROTHERS. Not actually related to Flower. Haydn is on the Lightning now and we miss him. Cale mostly plays for the Firebirds but he's developing well and has gotten called up several times this season.
- Ryan Winterton (Wints) - A goofy little baby. He's still playing mostly with the Firebirds but he had his NHL debut this season.
- Shane Wright - I don't actually know his nickname. (EDIT: I have been informed it is Shaner or Wrighter!) Big boy. Our SECOND DRAFT EVER. Playing with the minor leagues right now. We'll see him playing a line on Kraken next season or so, probably (?). If Coach Dave is willing.
THE OTHERS (THAT I OFTEN FORGET ABOUT):
- Brandon Tanev - Turbo. He's fast. Has beautiful long hair. Keeps getting hit by pucks because he's in the way. Fun fact: he helped start the 'Kraken are horses' thing because there was a video on Tiktok where an equipment manager was adjusting his skates and they used a hoof care video sound and it went viral. We might lose him when he's a free agent and that's fine.
- Jamie Oleksiak - Big Rig, Riggy. In my shit list right now because he's playing bad and I hate his stupid credit card commercial that they always play during games. Member of the 'my sister is prettier and a better athlete than me' club. People speculate there's a chance we might lose him over the summer when his no-trade clause opens up as well. He's often Borgy's d-partner, and he and Borgy are very very sweet though.
- Tomas Tatar - Tuna, he's fun and nice. I like his accent. Sometimes I forget he exists.
- Eeli Tolvanen - Tolvy. I also sometimes forget about him. Sorry. He's a buddy to everyone on the team though.
- Justin Shultz - Shultzy, he's fine. Gets injured a lot. Not the best player. I think we're gonna lose him eventually too.
- Brian Dumoulin - Dumo, he's also fine. He's won a couple Stanley Cups. Cute baby face for an older player but he gives a kinda empty brain, 'there's not a thought behind those eyes' feeling lol.
HOPE THIS HELPS. I ALSO HOPE THEY DON'T CRUSH THIS PRIMER OVER THE OFF SEASON WITH TRADES LOL but who knows. Whatever happens, happens. Just remember this team runs on love (and tentacles).
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minggukieology · 1 year
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So I have a question that requires an open mind and perhaps a “tin hat”. I was reading about Jimin referencing 2315 during PTD so I looked at dates. This is a reach.., but.. well here goes, lol.
If you calculate the number of days between Nov 8, 2015 and Feb 1, 2023 -excluding both Nov 8th and Feb 1st, it equals 2641 which added together is 13 :) Not sure if that is how date the calculations are done? Do you omit the starting and ending dates when calculating anniversaries etc?
Coincidence most definitely? Or not? If I did the calculations correctly, a nice coincidence?
Hi there! Thanks for your message.
First off, let me start by being very honest and saying I don't personally entertain this type of narrative no matter who it is done by and who it is about. Seeing some meaning in a set of numbers and then proceeding to throw random ones into the mix just so that they fit into your own presumed context is hitting QAnon level of conspiracy thinking. Alas you admit it yourself, yet proceed to pull strings from all possible corners to arrive at any satisfying (to you) conclusion. That being said if it makes sense to you and makes you happy, go ahead and enjoy it. But from my point of view, you just wrote a bunch of numbers and dates and drew connections that are void of reason.
Anyways to add a bit more cultural context, yes numbers and dates are important in Korean culture, esp when it comes to dating life, fortune etc. Korean couples celebrate their 100/×00th day anniversary, their yearly anniversary, their 1000th day anniversary; Peppero day, Valentines day, White day etc those are also all important in dating culture. So, yes counting days from when the couple officially got together is also a thing. To add, it is typically a young people thing, as they are prone to follow trends and show off their couple looks and gifts etc.
In context of BTS or specifically now Jimin and Jungkook, 13 has been mentioned a lot and yes there is a signifance for this number that is justified and logical, as they themselves referred to it on multiple occasions and emphasized its significance. It is also justified and logical to ascribe meaning to different dates that were pronounced and even mentioned by them, such as "Jimin day" or "Jungkook day." Similarly, we also have 지민+시 = 지민시 (Jimin+si) as 10:13 Jimin o'clock. However, anything beyond that is just fanmade narratives. And yes, I am fully aware a lot of those narratives come from Korean fans. But it is important to emphasize they are also just fans. Meanwhile the fandom might feel like their cultural background gives legitimacy to whatever they say and whatever patterns they see, they are no less prone to cognitive dissonance and logical fallacies as any other group of fans or group of people really.
This is now a whole meta discourse that could be dissected in pages and pages. But to sum up, I don't look for hidden meanings in the dates of their posts, and especially not the hour and the minute they post at, or try to analyze numbers they mention (in my opinion) pretty randomly (and even if not by random, anything that is not given context by them is just pure speculation, fantasy)
Once again, this egregiously long reply might feel like sort of an attack so let me reiterate: if these types of posts, theories, coincidences bring you joy, go ahead and indulge in them (I myself do sometimes as well)!! but please don't get too lost in the sauce. I understand, many jikookers are set out to *always* find some kind of connection or link in between Jimin and Jungkook even in completely unrelated scenarios, but make sure to be aware of this echo chamber and think critically.
(sidenote: I apologize if I am missing some obvious connotation that has sprung up on Twitter or some other corner of the Internet recently, I am not so active within the fandom anymore)
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maximuswolf · 1 year
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LF grinder suggestions
LF grinder suggestions Probably the 1000th grinder suggestion post but here goes:20 years of service from my Krupps GVX2 and it’s finally kicked the bucket. I’m looking for a decent replacement. I’m kind of between a Baratza Encore and a Baratza Sette 270.I currently use a 1zpresso JX Pro with a Flair Pro 2 espresso machine. The krupps was largely for ease of use for drip, pour over, aero press and for my partner who has no interest in fiddling around for coffee.I like the hand grinder for silently making coffee at 4am to avoid waking the household and for travel but the convenience of an electric grinder when I’m not worried about noise would be nice.Looking for thoughts and other suggestions TIA. Submitted February 16, 2023 at 07:05AM by ebombtoasted https://ift.tt/IPK5nsq via /r/Coffee
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retrievablememories · 3 years
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picture me | johnny (m)
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title: picture me pairing: vampire!johnny x black!reader genre: fantasy, romance, smut, fluff, angst summary: you meet a vampire-slash-photographer whose self-identity is increasingly lost to him, and you try to help him find some purpose again. word count: 18.3k warnings: age gap (cuz you know, vampires...but everyone is legal), mentions of discrimination/prejudice based on species, self-identity issues/self-deprecation, general angst, sheltered!reader, mentions of blood and drinking blood, oral sex (female and male receiving), fingering, thigh riding, loss of virginity, corruption kink, use of lube, unprotected sex (do not try at home), creampie, johnny is packing in this fic ok! a/n: today (the 28th) is my birthday, so i’m posting this 100% self-indulgent fic that i’ve been working on between requests since september. it was very hard to get johnny’s characterization right for this fic and idk if i actually succeeded but i’m not revising this for the 1000th time lol. i love this fic with my whole heart tho.
i haven’t seen many vampire fics that really explore the whole “doesn’t show up in mirrors/photos” concept (shout em out if you know em) and...there’s probably a reason for that, this shit is hard af to write and there are some logic issues but whatever 🤪
(the beginning quote is from “criminal,” stan taemin!!)
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The moment I fall for you is the end of my innocence
He sits in the same coffee shop everyday, like it’s a habit he just can’t break. But who are you to judge? You’re there, too. Watching him like a creep. Or maybe like an interested coffee shop patron, trying to be discreet and failing at it.
He wasn’t hard to notice. You’d never been to this coffee shop before, but your friend recommended it to you mostly for their in-house-made pastries; she claimed the coffee was good, too, but she wasn’t much of a caffeine person. You decided to give it a try when you had time between classes and a moment to breathe, not needing to talk to this advisor or that professor.
You saw him immediately when you walked past the shop window. He was sitting at a table near the front, staring down at his phone with a small cup of coffee sitting in front of him. Its miniscule size was almost comical in contrast to his...everything. He was tall—that much was obvious even with him sitting down—and imposing, wearing all black. His hair was equally pitch-black, his bangs hanging to one side and the rest shaved in an undercut. If you didn’t know much better, you’d think you’d stepped back into 2007 and landed dead in the middle of the emo craze.
He was interesting to look at. Not in a bad way, but in a way you don’t see very often. Deciding to walk in before you made yourself look totally weird staring at him through the window, you’d stepped into the coffee shop, the small bell dinging above your head. A barista greeted you at your entrance. Out of the corner of your eye you saw the man, to your left, still looking at his phone.
You’d given your order and waited for it to be ready before taking it to a table on the other side of the shop. From that vantage point, you had a good view of the man. You tried to keep your eyes on your food and your phone, not wanting to spend the whole time looking at him, but it was a little hard not to.
When you took a bite of your pastry, you quickly discovered it was just as delicious as your friend promised—probably even more so. You made a noise of approval before you could catch yourself, and you glanced around the shop in embarrassment to see if anyone nearby noticed. Didn’t seem like it, at first. But then you glanced over to the man again only to find him looking at you below his eyelashes with a small, amused smile on his lips. He only kept his gaze on you for a second before returning to his phone.
What? You hadn’t thought you were that loud. How did he hear you from over there, and above the noise of the café? Even now, you remember how embarrassed you’d felt, ducking your head and looking away.
The man finished his coffee not long after that; he slipped his phone into his pocket and stood up. You glanced up only momentarily when he stood, but your eyes soon slid back to his form when you noticed something odd. On the wall behind him, there was a big oval mirror sitting pretty in its elaborate silver frame. He stood just a few feet in front of it, yet there was no reflection of him. The only thing you could see was the other side of the café reflected back, with another man sitting alone at a booth enjoying his own coffee. The tall man’s reflection was nowhere to be found.
That was when you figured he must be a vampire.
You’d never met one before. At least, you didn’t think you had until then.
Unbeknownst to you, vampires are notoriously able to blend in more easily than most other supernatural beings—until faced with situations like that one in the coffee shop. Ultimately, there’s no faking a reflection no matter how hard you try to remain inconspicuous.
The man had caught your eye again. Thinking back on it, you aren’t sure of what expression you had on your face or what it must’ve looked like to him. It must’ve been something akin to surprise, though; you weren’t quick enough to disguise your reaction at his lack of a reflection.
He gave you another smile, though it felt sadder than the previous one, and walked out of the store, the small bell on the door ringing at his departure. He disappeared down the street in a swirl of black fabric, almost like something out of a movie, and you watched him retreat until you could see him no more.
You scraped your index fingernail over the wood table your food was resting on, your mind whirring with all kinds of thoughts. Your interest was piqued. And yet there was no way for you to know if you’d see him again.
At least, that’s what you believed then. Luckily for you, your subsequent visits to the coffee shop have proven fruitful; the strange, tall vampire is there more often than not, always in the same spot in front of that same mirror. Sometimes he reads a book, other times he looks at his phone, and other times still, he stares out the window at the passersby.
He acknowledges you whenever he sees you, either with a nod or a smile. You’ve never spoken to each other, though you know what his voice sounds like from hearing him talk to the baristas. It’s a nice voice, rich and handsome like him, and you find yourself gradually wanting to hear it spoken in your direction. But you aren’t sure how to talk to him, or what you should say.
There’s a lot you want to know about him and his vampirism, but you don’t think it’s fair to bombard him with questions right after meeting him—if you could somehow work up the nerve for that first step.
When you were young, your parents made sure to keep you safely sheltered away from anyone who could potentially be a vampire or any other nonhuman being. This game kept up until you went to college, where they could no longer “shield” you. Because of their lifelong fear and disgust, your knowledge of nonhuman beings is scarce and mostly inaccurate.
The man’s skin isn’t deathly pale like you’ve heard others say vampires always are. It’s nicely tanned, in fact. Nor are his eyes red, or his canine teeth abnormally sharp. And obviously, he has no aversion to sunlight, otherwise he wouldn’t be out here during the day. The only visible marker of his inhuman nature is his lack of a reflection. Maybe he’s not a vampire at all? Maybe he’s another type of being entirely. That only makes you more curious.
It’s not rare to come across supernatural beings, but they only make themselves known if they want to, or if it’s imperative to their survival. Most of them would rather quietly assimilate amongst humans or stay safe and hidden within their own communities. Humans are still too judgmental towards those who are different from themselves for nonhumans to feel truly safe or welcomed—at least not on a global scale. Small pockets of communities forged with human allies are helpful and sometimes vital for survival, but not always enough.
These small tidbits of information cycle through your mind as September gradually bleeds into October. You continue watching the thoughtful man in the coffee shop and making up your own secret theories about his life. You haven’t told anyone from school about this, because you already know the reaction would be nothing short of awful. Your parents would only let you go to school at the one university in the city that explicitly didn’t allow supernatural beings; it goes without saying that your classmates don’t view them in a positive light.
Part of you feels like you might be breaking the unspoken rules just by being at this coffee shop all the time and allowing this man to take up space in your mind. But who will know what’s inside your thoughts except you?
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One day, your friend decides to accompany you on your lunch break, finally stopping by the café she recommended to you. The man is already there, as usual, and he smiles slightly when you and your friend enter. She doesn’t catch this, too busy wondering what she’s going to get off the menu today.
“I haven’t been here in forever, I wonder if Sam still remembers me?” You know Sam to be one of the baristas there, having read it on their name tag before.
“I doubt there are very many people who’d forget you,” you answer.
When you both have your food, you take a booth farther away from where the man sits, though you can still see him easily from this distance. Your friend settles into the seat in front of you.
You try to keep things inconspicuous throughout your conversation, but you must glance over at him one too many times, because your friend eventually raises her eyebrows questioningly. She turns around in her seat, making it obvious that she’s looking, and you groan as you keep your eyes in the opposite direction towards the window.
“Who’s that guy you keep staring at?”
You cough. “No one.”
“He’s obviously someone. Someone interesting enough to hold your attention.”
“I don’t know the man,” you say curtly. You shuffle your napkin and spoon aimlessly, your nervousness rising. What if he has some kind of enhanced hearing and can hear what you’re saying right now? He definitely heard you make that noise that first day.
Your friend looks at the ceiling and blows air out of her mouth. “Whatever. I’ll find out who he is sooner or later.”
You take a sip of your drink and lower your voice to just above a whisper. Although you want to leave the subject alone, you’re curious about one thing. “You mean you’ve never seen him before? This café was your hangout spot before it was mine.”
She shrugs. “No, I think I would’ve remembered someone as...visually striking as him. Why are we whispering, anyway? It’s not like he can hear us above all this noise.”
You think to yourself, I’m not so sure about that, but you merely shake your head.
You spend a few more minutes talking before movement catches the corner of your eye. At this point, it’s practically a reflex for you to look in that direction. You try not to, but your friend has already caught you and turns her head to spy, too. The man has gotten up for whatever reason to say something to one of the baristas at the counter. Your gaze darts back to your cup after you’ve gotten your eyeful, but you’re nearly startled into dropping the cup at your friend’s gasp.
Oh. The mirror.
She grips the edge of the table. “He’s a vampire…?”
You don’t know what to say to that, and you feel oddly guilty for some reason you can’t pinpoint. Like you’ve been caught with your hand in the cookie jar. “U-um, I don’t know…?” You can hardly finish your thought before your friend is scrambling to grab her purse. She hurriedly stands out of the seat, tugging your arm as she does.
“Come on. We shouldn’t stay here.”
“Are you serious—?” You feel embarrassed heat rip through your body at her display; some other café-goers are already looking at her curiously, probably wondering what the hell she’s doing. She tugs more incessantly, and you already know she’ll get louder if you don’t get up now and defuse the situation. Leaving your half-full cup behind, you grab your things and follow her out of the store, keeping your eyes firmly on her back as you pass by the man. You don’t know if he looked up, or if he could sense the reason for your sudden departure—you’ve never left the shop before him until now—and you don’t want to know.
Neither of you talk until you’re well down the street and around the corner. “That wasn’t necessary,” you huff, your hands still sweating from the spiked adrenaline at suddenly being rushed out.
“Yes it was! We all know bloodsuckers and all these other weirdos are dangerous...even if they think they’re being well-intentioned by living among humans. I hope you don’t go back there.”
“Whatever...you’re the one who told me to visit the café,” you mumble, unable to muster up the energy to say anything more. You both know very well she can’t tell you where to go, but you hope she doesn’t mention this to your other acquaintances on campus and make it into a bigger deal than it is.
When you part ways with your friend and get back to your dorm, you realize you’re missing your planner. The planner with all your upcoming assignment dates in it. You sigh heavily and roll your eyes, knowing it must’ve happened in the chaos of her pulling you out of the shop. Maybe if you’re really lucky, it’ll still be there, picked up by an employee or simply left untouched. Knowing how many people go through that café in a day, you’re not optimistic.
For the first time since visiting the quaint little shop, you’re not anticipating returning and seeing the man again, afraid he’ll ignore you or look at you with distaste—like you’re just another unsympathetic human. And would he be wrong to think that? You’re only strangers to each other.
You try not to dwell on it too hard when you go to bed that night.
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When lunch rolls around the next day, you hesitate a couple times on your way to the café, not wanting to show up. However, the desire to see what became of your planner pushes you forward. You don’t even have to stay; if it’s there, you’ll take it and leave. If it’s not—oh well. You can still leave. It’s not hard to buy another.
He’s there when you arrive, of course.
He nods at you when you step inside, though he doesn’t smile as he’s become accustomed to doing. You nod back, but you can’t ignore the renewed rush of embarrassment you feel. You linger at the entrance for a second longer, wondering if maybe you should say something. Apologize, even? But what if he really didn’t know what was going on yesterday? Then how odd would you look for bringing it up?
You decide to move on and go back to the booth to search for your belongings, but his voice stops you. This takes you by surprise.
“Did you come back for this?”
You turn to him to see him holding your planner in his hand. You stare, momentarily dumbfounded, and almost shake your head before realizing it is yours. Definitely the same sticker-covered, scribbled-all-over planner.
“Oh—y-yeah. Thank you.” He passes it to you, though you notice he’s very careful not to let your hands touch. You’re a little perplexed about why, but then the rumors about vampires having cold skin pop up in your mind. Maybe that’s actually true, too. “I usually don’t lose things so easily, but…” Your voice falters, and you don’t know how to finish that sentence without bringing up the other day’s events.
He doesn’t seem to mind as he replies, “It happens to all of us sometimes...I don’t know what I’d do if I lost my camera.”
“You take pictures?” you ask, a tinge of curiosity in your voice.
He nods. “I take photos of anything that interests me. Which often ends up being everything I see. I work at an art museum, so I guess having an eye for photography comes in handy.” He hesitates for a second, then says, “I could show you some?” He waves his phone, indicating that the photos are there.
“Oh, sure.” The man gestures for you to sit down in the empty chair in front of him, and you do so. He swipes through his phone a few times until he settles on what he’s searching for, then puts the device on the table and slides it to you. You lean forward to look at it and see that it displays an album full of pictures, simply titled with the emoji “🌌.”
“It’s okay, you can pick it up.” He chuckles. You pick up the phone and swipe through the numerous pictures. Many of them are nighttime shots of the moon, trees, half-empty streets, darkened storefronts. Others depict nature scenes at sunset or the beginning of sunrise, with the sky colored in darker hues. No matter what the subject matter is, they all look to be professionally taken, even for an iPhone.
“Wow, these are nice. You said you work at a museum…are you a professional photographer, too?”
The man shrugs, and as you look at his slight grin, you realize you still don’t know his name. “Something like that, I guess.”
“You should be if you aren’t already,” you say, looking through more photos. “I’m sure you’d make a lot of money.” When you reach the end of the album, you go to hand the phone back to him but realize he’ll probably want to avoid contact again, so you slide it across the table. He takes it and slips it into his pocket.
“I don’t really care about the money,” he responds. “I just like it because…” He trails off, unsure how to convey his thoughts, wondering if he should even get that personal with a stranger. “It...helps me pass the time.” He’s not quite satisfied by that answer—it doesn’t feel like enough—but it’s all he can think of on the spot.
“Well, that’s nice too. It’s always good to have a hobby just for the sake of it...not for anyone’s benefit but your own.”
“Do you have one?” He takes a sip of his coffee. You don’t expect to be asked about your own interests, and your mind goes blank as you try to think. Why does this always happen when I’m asked these kinds of questions?
“Um, just different things here and there.”
“You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to,” he says, amused.
“It’s not that, I just don’t have a ton of hobbies or anything. I’m kinda boring, so…” And wasn’t allowed to do much of anything until I left home.
“Being boring isn’t always a bad thing.”
You lean back in your seat, shrugging slightly. “Maybe if you see it that way. My friends don’t.”
“Would one of those happen to be the same one who dragged you out of here yesterday?” He speaks casually, putting his cheek in his hand. You slump further down in your seat, feeling exposed. Of course there was no escaping this topic. He notices your mood shift and shakes his head. “You don’t have to feel so bad about it. It’s not the first time and it won’t be the last.”
“I’m sorry for all that mess,” you murmur, unable to meet his eyes. “Really, I am.” You stand up from the seat, gripping your planner. “Thanks again for this. I don’t want to take up any more of your time today.” You’re about to turn to leave when he speaks again.
“You don’t have to be afraid of me, you know…you could talk with me whenever you feel like it.” That’s the last thing you expect him to say. His voice takes on a quality that’s...not what you’d call begging, but it’s clear he’d enjoy some company. Maybe he’s doing this for your benefit as well as his own, because it’s obvious how your eyes always stray to his little corner.
You nod, giving him an apprehensive smile. “I’ll keep that in mind, then.”
The rest of your day after that is uneventful, full of classes and unexciting lectures, but you keep thinking of one thing. Though he appears to enjoy his time in the coffee shop, how lonely must he really be? There’s never anyone else around him. His eyes when he’d spoken to you held a certain sadness.
And you still didn’t get his name.
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You don’t see him for the next few days, mostly because you aren’t at the café. You’ve gotten busy with a new project and haven’t had as much time to return to the coffee shop, mostly spending your time in the library instead.
When you finally get a chance to buy lunch outside campus, he’s not there. This disappoints you more than you thought it would, and you wonder what his absence means. Did he just decide not to come today, or has he found another place to frequent? You kind of hope the second option isn’t the case, though you also don’t know why you’re even caring this much about where someone else goes on their own time.
You get a drink to-go this time, deciding you’ll just take it back to the library and continue your studies there. The entryway bell rings behind you as you wait for your order to be made, though you don’t pay it much attention; half of your mind is still occupied with what you need to do next for your project.
When you turn around to leave the shop with your drink, you’re surprised to see the man standing there, waiting to get his own coffee. “You’re late,” you blurt out. You immediately feel silly for saying it, but he doesn’t seem to mind.
He gives you a slight smile. “Yes, I am.” Then he spots your to-go cup. “Are you leaving?”
“Uh, well,” you glance at your drink, “are you staying?”
He nods as he steps up to the counter. “Yeah, I’m staying. My offer’s still open, by the way.”
Right. The offer to talk to him sometimes. You’re tempted to stay awhile and talk to him now, though you don’t even know what about. Your project? That’s boring. Him being a vampire? Too invasive. Your school? Also boring, and probably not the best idea considering which one you attend.
“I...think I’ll stay, then.”
You both sit at his usual table, with you grinning nervously.
“How are you? I noticed you hadn’t showed up in a while,” he asks, settling back in his chair.
“Yeah, I’m doing fine, I’m just busy with school stuff. These teachers don’t give us a break.” You laugh a little, shaking your head.
“I’m sorry to hear that.” He grins. “I never did go to college, but I’ve always heard others talk about how tiring it is. And expensive.”
“They’re right.” You roll your eyes at the thought of it. “But I guess it’ll all be worth it in the end. Maybe. If the economy isn’t in the toilet.” The sound of his laughter is nice, and you’re glad you could make him laugh. “Also, I’m sorry—I don’t know how this flew under the radar, but I don’t know your name.”
He shrugs. “Nothing to apologize for, really. It’s Johnny.”
You tell him your name, too. “Since I haven’t seen you lately...how are you doing?” You circle your hands around your to-go cup, feeling its warmth transfer to your palms as you await his answer.
“I think I can say I’m the same as always—which is fine. Life slows down a little when you have a lot of time on your hands.” Johnny’s lips quirk up at that, and you think he might be referring to his vampirism. Your eyes widen a little.
“What’s that like? Having so much free time. I wouldn’t know much about that right now, but…”
“Maybe not as pleasant as you think it’d be. But there’s good in it. Like coming and going when you want to. And you can take up whatever interests you want without worrying as much about busy schedules.” You already know he’s alluding to his photography. “I do like having a job, though…it gives me structure.”
“You’re probably right…I wouldn’t know the first thing to do if I had a ton of free time…like, which hobbies to pick up first.” You consider how you initially thought about him being lonely and wonder if that’s one of the unpleasant parts he hinted to. “Speaking of hobbies...did you take any new pictures lately?”
Johnny nods. “Most of them were on my camera this time, but some are on my phone. You want to see?”
“Yes!”
Johnny lets you have his phone again to look through the newest pictures he’s taken. There are varying shots of car-lined streets and storefronts, some of the latter decorated with glowing jack-o-lanterns for the onset of October. A pigeon sits on a streetlamp during the daytime, holding its head up like royalty upon a throne. In another image, a stray cat and her kittens huddle in an alley, the babies grooming each other while the mother looks quizzically at the camera.
You recognize a few photos from the nearby park; he also had some pictures of it the last time you looked. “Do you go to this park often?”
“Yeah, it offers some great shots. It’s especially pretty if you go just before the sun sets...the light filters through the tree leaves and it looks kinda like a kaleidoscope.”
“Ah, I’ve never seen that before…” you say a little sadly. Your parents didn’t much like taking you to that park when you were younger because of how far it is from their house. And since living away from them, you’ve only been able to visit it during the early hours of the day—like now.
Johnny looks closely at you. “Would you ever want to?”
“If it’s as pretty as you say, I should.” You slide the phone back across the table to him, not catching what he’s trying to hint at as you keep talking. “Do you go anywhere else besides here and the park?” As soon as you say it, you realize this might sound a little rude and try to make a quick save. “I mean, do you have any other favorite places? I’m not trying to say you don’t have a life or anything!”
Johnny laughs at your slight panic at thinking you’ve offended him. “Nothing too out-there, I guess. The bookstore, the photography store, the theater. Pretty much all the same places others visit.”
“The movies are fun.” You trace your finger across the table’s surface, thinking of your own favorite spots. “Me and my friends like to go downtown. There are a lot of cute little shops down there…”
You and Johnny talk for a while longer, and you almost forget you have to get back to campus until you glance at the wall clock. “Oh no, I’m gonna be late.” Flustered, you jump out of your seat and crumple your empty cup. “Sorry to cut it short, Johnny, but I gotta go back now.”
He smiles good-naturedly and nods, his dark bangs sweeping his face. “I understand.” As he watches you gather your things and get ready to go, he speaks up again. “Actually, if you want to see the park at sunset sometime...I could show you? It’s up to you.”
You pause, suddenly curious at the thought of seeing him outside the café. In the back of your mind, you feel a little paranoid and afraid of your friend or maybe even your parents seeing you there with him, though the latter is extremely unlikely. It’s hard to shake that familiar fear of judgment and ostracism when it’s been ingrained in you since childhood. “That sounds good. If it’s not any trouble for you…?”
“Never too much trouble. I usually get off around 4 on Fridays, just before the sun sets at 5. Unless the weekend is better for you?”
You nod, holding your books tighter to your chest. “Friday will work for me! I’ll meet up with you then.”
Johnny smiles. “Great; I’ll see you then, kind stranger.”
Maybe he says it to be joking or quirky, to sound like one of those characters in a movie or drama, but it makes you smile. Nodding to him again, you step out of the café and rush towards the direction of your school. Johnny watches as you retreat, your roles reversed.
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You meet up with Johnny at the park that Friday, just as you both agreed. You spot him sitting on a bench near the park entrance, waiting on your arrival.
Johnny’s wardrobe is still mostly dark, but it’s a little lighter than usual today. He’s changed things up with a white polo shirt underneath his black sweater. Seeing him dressed like this, you wonder what he’d be like as a student, or maybe even a university professor.
He stands up when you get closer, hearing the sound of your footsteps approaching and turning towards you. His camera sits safely around his neck, the lens catching in the light of the sun.
When you stop in front of him, he smiles at you warmly. You try to relax into the genuineness of that smile and ignore the still-lingering traces of anxiety about being out with him. “Hi, Johnny!”
“Hi, Y/N.”
You and Johnny walk around the park as he looks for something interesting to shoot. He snaps a few shots of the trees, fallen leaves, bushes, and other natural elements along the way, though it seems like he hasn’t quite captured what he wants yet.
“Are you looking for something specific?” you ask, peering at his camera as he holds it in his hands.
“There’s an aster bush around here,” he responds. “It hadn’t fully bloomed yet the last time I was here, but it should be open by now.”
It turns out he’s right as you two finally come up on the bush. Its blooms make bright purple smudges against the rest of the landscape, which is a monochrome red-and-orange palette from the leaves changing their hues. You watch as he comes up to the bush carefully and quietly, like it’s a small animal he’s afraid to scare away. Johnny is very attentive while taking pictures of it, always conscious of getting the correct lighting and securing the exact angles he wants to capture. “Compassionate” is not a word you’d usually associate with the act of taking photos, but that’s the only word you can currently think of to describe this display. He treats the flowers with a peculiar sense of respect, as if they’re a human subject.
After he’s gotten the images he wants, Johnny offers you his camera to take a few of your own. You’re anxious about holding his prized possession and are afraid you’ll find a way to mess something up, but he promises you it’s fine. You take a few shots of the sky, still with a few wisps of clouds left, and a nearby tree that’s almost stripped bare of leaves. You know the shots will probably end up blurry from your unsteady hands, but Johnny tells you you’ve done a good job anyway.
Something about getting his approval makes a pleasant warmth settle in your chest.
As you both walk down a long trail, you finally ask him, “Sorry if this is invasive, but I was wondering how old are you? Like...as a vampire.” Your voice becomes hesitant on the word vampire, even though you’re the only two in this part of the park.
He chuckles a bit. “I’m 85.” You try not to look surprised. “I’ve been turned for 60 years. Old, but probably a little younger than most vampires you’d think of.”
“Kinda,” you say quietly. “They’re always like 2,000 years old in movies.”
“The ancient vampires are purebloods. They keep to themselves and avoid mingling with turned vampires, let alone humans. Some people are even skeptical if they exist. Supposedly, they use humans as servants or blood banks.” He gives you an apologetic look after saying this, though you don’t really know why. You don’t get the feeling he’d do that to another being, but he is still mostly a stranger... “At least, that’s what my mentor told me.”
Your curiosity is roused at all this new knowledge. “You had a mentor?”
“An older woman. She was also a turned vampire.”
“Turned, huh…”
Johnny nods, toeing at a small pile of leaves on the ground. “She went away eventually, said people are meant to pass in and out of each other’s lives. I don’t think she ever had intentions to stay. But I enjoyed her company while she was there.” Johnny stops at a short bridge above a small manmade lake, and you both look down into the water.
You place your arms on the bridge railing so you can lean over more. You notice he doesn’t have a reflection in the water, and this startles you more than you expected. Before meeting this strange man, you’d never thought much before about why vampires don’t have mirror reflections, but it seems even more unnatural to see this phenomenon happen again in the lake.
You find yourself looking at the side of Johnny’s face, trying to read his expression as he peers into the water’s depths. He turns to you, and you flinch at being caught staring, but he only smiles slightly. You force yourself to form words and break the silence. “What—what did you do after she left?”
“Lived on my own. She taught me a lot of things to help me live independently as a vampire, so it wasn’t too difficult to get along without her...but emotionally? A different story.”
“You sound like you had a very close relationship with her.”
“Yes. Quite close…” Johnny’s tone suggests something deeper, more intimate than a regular friendship. You feel a bit astounded at the idea of him having an older, more worldly lover while being only a newly changed vampire. Your reaction makes you feel foolish, inexperienced. Still, you can’t help imagining a scenario of them living in a big, dark mansion somewhere in the mountains, rolling around in a bed with bloody red sheets—and maybe drinking from the occasional naïve, misled human hiker.
Strangely, too, you feel jealous at his freedom, his ability to go wherever and do whatever with whoever he wants without overbearing relatives always just a step away.
You continue staring at the ripples as they circle in and out of the water’s surface, the motions triggered by a small orange leaf falling into the lake. You’re unsure of what could be the right thing to say to his admission, so you blurt out whatever comes to mind next. “You said she taught you to live independently as a vampire. What does that mean? How do you get...you know. Blood?”
“There are ways,” Johnny says cryptically, which makes your own blood rush faster. He turns to you with a grin, like he finds your naivety endearing. “It’s nothing drastic, though. At least, not for me. I never drink directly.” It does make sense that there are other ways to drink human blood without taking it straight from their necks, though you can only speculate on which methods he prefers. “Drinking directly is lethal, and often not worth it.”
“So, it’s true that vampire bites can kill?” You watch as Johnny pushes himself off the railing, and you follow him as he continues down the trail.
“It’s not false. But it’s never really that simple.” Johnny’s answer is mysterious, and he doesn’t elaborate further. He turns to you. “Where did you hear that, anyway? Your university? The one that bans all nonhuman beings?”
“You know where I go to school?” You feel embarrassed, thinking he must assume you’re like the rest of the student body who hates nonhumans but still nurtures an odd obsession with them.
“I saw it on your notebook one day, the school insignia. I’m not a stalker, by the way.” You laugh only slightly, and Johnny seems crestfallen when he notices your apprehension. “I don’t care if you attend school there. Just because you do doesn’t mean you think the way they do.”
“You must think I’m some weird opportunist, then,” you mutter, heat finding its way to your face. “Asking you all these questions...I’m sorry.”
“I don’t think anything except that you’re a pleasant person to be around.”
You’re quiet for a moment, letting the compliment sink in. You think you should probably give him one of his own, but before you can, he says, “Look. The sun’s already setting.” Just like he told you before, the dying rays filter through the tree leaves and create impossibly intricate patterns on your surroundings. You hold your hand out and watch the latticework that the leaves create dance over your open palm.
You let Johnny take a picture of your hand with the tree shadows flitting over it, but you shy away from the camera’s lens when he points it higher to your face, a questioning look in his eyes. “Maybe some other day.”
You walk around for a while longer until the sky bleeds into a dark purple. “I guess I should be going soon. It’s getting late,” you say, though you’re also a bit sad over your evening with Johnny meeting its end.
“Do you want me to take you back to campus? You shouldn’t walk back alone. My car is just in the parking lot there.” He points to it where it sits in the distance.
You look at Johnny with a confused gaze. “But you can’t come on campus. They have...things to ward off vampires.” Like gates made of pure silver, displaying intimidating, elaborately designed crosses. You don’t know if any of it actually works, but it’s probably better not to find out.
Johnny doesn’t seem bothered by this information. “Yeah…I know. I can just drop you at the street across from the main gate.”
You hesitate a moment longer but eventually agree. He is right; you’d rather not walk alone at night, and getting a ride with him is better—and cheaper—than calling for a rideshare.
The ride to the college is fairly quiet, with the radio filling the silence. It’s not an awkward type of stillness, at least, which you’re grateful for.
As he said he would, Johnny parks on the side of the street that sits in front of the main gate, just outside the immediate vicinity of the campus. The metal crosses stare back at the both of you, glinting in the light of nearby streetlamps. You turn your face away from them, biting the inside of your cheek.
You unbuckle your seatbelt. “Thanks again for the ride. I guess I’ll see you back at the shop next week, yeah?” Again, you get the urge to say something, anything, to remedy or cover up the foreboding source of discomfort sitting just in front of you, but there’s no one sentence you could say to wipe away decades of hatred.
Johnny nods and smiles, and still he shows no signs of being disturbed. He doesn’t cast another glance at the gates. “It’s no problem. See you then.”
You get out of his car and cross the street to get inside the gate; it’s early enough in the evening for it to still be open. Any later, and it’d be locked shut to even humans. You risk another wave at him before turning back around and heading for your dorm, which sits a few yards from the entrance. Johnny lets the car idle on the side of the street until you’ve walked into the dorm, and only then does he drive away.
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It doesn��t take very long for you to warm up to Johnny inviting you to other places. The next time you and him go somewhere other than the coffee shop, you accompany him as he buys some film for his camera on one of his free days. You don’t know a ton about photography, so you’re more than happy to let him tell you all about how film works and why he buys certain kinds over others.
The place he frequents is a specialty photography shop that still carries older varieties of film—ones that fell out of favor once digital cameras became a thing. The store looks noticeably old, but not in an unkempt or decrepit way. You can tell it’s been around for a while, holding all kinds of history in its structure.
“There are so many different types.” You look over a shelf of film rolls in awe. “How can you tell them all apart?”
Johnny laughs. “It gets easier if you’ve been doing it for a while…or a few decades.” He picks one up from a row of them and holds it in front of you. “35mm is the most common type, which is what you’ll find the most of when you look through any film shop. That’s what I use.”
He sets that one down and walks past another display of film rolls, gesturing toward them. “There’s also 120 and 220 film formats here…those work for even older cameras, sorta like ones you’d see in 1930s movies. You can even turn a film camera into a digital camera.”
You nod to his words, looking over what seems like millions of film canisters—and occasionally glancing at the lines of his broad back as he walks ahead of you. “You should teach a photography class. I’d be more willing to listen to you than some old professor.”
Johnny snickers. “Huh, I don’t know. Not a professor, but I am old.”
You both continue walking through the store, with Johnny giving you the rundown on every item that catches your interest.
Like the coffee shop, there’s another mirror in this store. Many more, actually—there are whole rows of them on a series of shelves, all in varying sizes and shapes. They create a fragmented view of your form as you stand in front of them, though you don’t initially realize you’ve crossed into their glassy line of sight. You’re busier with looking at a roll of film Johnny’s handed you. When you notice your reflection shifting in your peripheral view, you look up.
Johnny’s only a few feet behind you, and you know this because you can hear him and feel his presence. Yet, it’s strange to see yourself as the only person in the aisle.
Eventually, he notices what’s got you preoccupied and comes to stand next to you. Though you see him clearly in front of your eyes, there’s no trace of him in the glass reflections.
Suddenly, you’re hit with the aching loneliness of it—how it must feel to never see yourself. You can see him with your own eyes, and so can everyone else who encounters him, but what must it be like to be virtually invisible outside of other peoples’ perceptions of you? You almost feel utterly alone even though you know he’s beside you.
Noticing your sudden melancholy, Johnny takes the film roll from your hand and tosses it up in the air, making it look like it’s moving on its own in the mirrors. He means to lighten the mood, if only to see the cloudiness disappear from your expression. It works to a degree, though you still feel downcast deep below.
“It’s not good to dwell on it.” Johnny presses the film roll back into your hand, still carefully avoiding skin contact. He has no problem meeting your eyes, though, and you shyly look away from his dark gaze after a few prolonged moments.
“You’re right,” you say softly, turning back to the aisle and away from the rows of mirrors.
You and Johnny head to the coffee shop after your trip to the photography store. Once you get your drinks and sit down in your usual spot, he speaks suddenly. “Something’s wrong.”
Your eyes dart around the shop, thinking he’s referring to one of the patrons around you. “What? What’s wrong?” Your voice comes out a bit panicked. He doesn’t want to laugh, but he does.
“No, I mean...something’s wrong with you. You seem far away.”
“Oh…” You wonder if you should even bring it up and potentially ruin the mood. But you have been curious for weeks now, and you don’t think you’ll get a trustworthy answer by asking anyone other than him. “I just...I was wondering why you don’t have a reflection. I know it’s a vampire thing, but I’ve never really known why...you don’t need to answer, though. Like you said, it’s not good to dwell on it.”
Johnny makes a motion like a half-nod once your question is revealed, his eyes darting to the window and back to the table. His fingers trace across the rim of his coffee cup, a thoughtful but stormy expression on his face, and you’re afraid you shouldn’t have reawakened this topic. “You know...being undead means being in two places at once.”
“Two places?”
“We are caught between the living world and the world of the dead. Something that’s not really supposed to exist, yet…” He’s quiet for a moment. “You can only imagine the kind of issues and side effects that can cause. One of them being no reflection.”
“I never thought of it like that,” you say. “Two planes of existence...what does it mean to be a part of the world of the dead?”
“Our blood runs slower. Ours is more like sludge compared to yours. The heart beats only a few times per minute. Don’t need to eat or sleep, either, though many vampires still do.” Johnny pauses. “How much do you really know about vampires?”
“I don’t know much about any of this...stuff.” You gesture vaguely, meaning all supernatural beings and not just vampires. “No one ever told me these things growing up, and it’s hard to tell truth from fiction at school. People will say anything, horrible things, and you just take it at face value, I guess. I never really thought to try to find the reality.” You sigh. “Sometimes I feel like I’m the only person in the world who doesn’t know anything.”
“Learning is good. You can always learn. I don’t think it’s too late for that.” Johnny’s voice is a little lighter. “Anyway, everyone’s knowledge is different. Sometimes it slips my mind that everyone doesn’t know what it’s like to live as a vampire, though the world never lets me forget for long.”
“Then…do you hang out with other vampires who do understand? Or…maybe humans who can sympathize?”
Johnny gives a humorless laugh. “Most humans are hesitant to interact with us, if not full-out terrified or disgusted. At the museum...it’s less pronounced because all the employees already know. They…tolerate it. But every time someone else realizes what I am and doesn’t take well to it?” He shakes his head, acts like he’ll say something else, and then abandons that line of thought. “And do you really think I’d want to spend my free time around other bloodsuckers?” He tries to play it off as a joke, but you’re more inclined to think he actually feels that way. You can only nod, feeling bad for him but also a little disturbed by his view of his own kind.
“I think you’re a kind person, and you being a vampire doesn’t affect that,” you say hesitantly. “I like talking to you. And even if you feel that way about other vampires, I…wish you wouldn’t feel that about yourself.”
Johnny remains quiet, but he nods. You wonder about the struggle occurring in his mind. The only outward hint of his uneasy state shows in the furrow of his eyebrows and the tense set of his mouth. With his right hand resting on the table, he rubs his fingers together absentmindedly, like he’s analyzing your words. You have a sudden and startling desire to hold his hand, to twine your fingers together and feel his skin on yours for the first time, but you don’t dare cross that boundary.
He finally replies with, “You’re much kinder to me, an old and bitter vampire, than you probably should be. But maybe that’s a good thing about you.”
“I think it’s a good thing,” you agree, your voice low. “Every living being needs companionship. Good companionship, anyway.”
The corners of Johnny’s lips shift in something reminiscent of a smile. He turns a rueful gaze once again to the window, lifting his coffee cup to his lips. “Aren’t I lucky to have yours, then.”
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On a day when you don’t have as many responsibilities to juggle, you visit Johnny at the art museum after his working hours are up. He’d already invited you to come to the museum any day you felt like so he could show you around. 
When you get there, he’s waiting in the visitor’s lobby for you, framed by receding sunlight as the day starts fading into night. He looks the same as he always does when you see him in the café on his lunch breaks, but within the context of the museum, he suddenly seems more…alive? Vibrant? He could’ve served as a muse for one of the many statuesque, perfectly proportional sculptures in the museum, and you’d never know anything different.
Your heartbeat increases at the sight of him, just enough to be outside the normal range.
“Hi, Johnny. I hope your day went well?”
“It was fine, nothing too crazy. But it’s better now.” And he smiles at you, sincere enough to make your heart ache.
“Oh—that’s great.” That’s it? You scold yourself internally, but you aren’t quick enough to think up a witty reply to his comment before the topic shifts.
“Is there anything in particular you wanna see first?” Johnny asks, leading you further into the museum.
“I guess I hadn’t thought too deeply about that…do you have a favorite exhibit? I want to see what you like.”
Johnny smiles faintly. “Let’s see, then.”
The dark-haired man takes you to a section of the museum filled with oil paintings, all by one singular artist. At first, all you see is varying shades of black and gray and red, with some white splashed in between. When you begin looking at the paintings more closely, it’s easier to see that each one depicts a different scene of chaos. Maybe a sort of organized chaos, but disarray all the same.
There is one picture that holds a clearer subject than the rest. One of the oil paintings is of a vampire—obvious by the fangs—with bloodied lips and anguished eyes. You pause when you catch sight of it, your steps stilled by the sheer frenzy in the other being’s painted eyes. Their hands reach out for the viewer as if begging for an escape that can only be provided by whoever’s observing.
“This one was painted by a fellow vampire, you know. The same one who did all the rest of the paintings in this gallery,” Johnny explains. He points at the placard next to the painting that displays the artist’s name and a short description of the piece. The word fellow comes off his tongue wrapped in cynicism. “And it was one of the ones I personally chose for this exhibit.”
You glance at him, a tinge of surprise blooming in your chest. “Really?”
He nods. “Who better to depict the ills of vampirism than a vampire themselves? I thought it was a…fascinating change of pace from all the humans who try and fail to do so, ironic as that is.”
If you look at the painting for long enough, you think you can recognize sadness in the corners of the vampire’s eyes—pure, unadulterated sadness. Different from anguish or panic. A similar mask of sadness you’ve seen on the man next to you.
You say nothing for a while. You simply feel the painful throb of your heart in your chest and listen to the small sounds around you. Even now, there are still other people exploring the museum and walking through this very exhibit, but you can’t hear or see any of them. Johnny notices the disconcerted look on your face, and his forehead creases. “But I’m sure you want to see something less…morbid than this, right? Come on.”
“Uh, I-I don’t mind,” you insist, even though you feel like you’ve just awoken from a painful trance by the sound of his voice. But he’s already gesturing for you to follow him elsewhere.
The next set of paintings you end up in front of are a series of sunflower studies. One frame depicts the long green stems; another provides an up-close view of their lined petals. One zooms in close on the flower’s brown center, only small glimpses of yellow left at the edges of the frame.
“This is definitely very different.” You look at him, a small smile pulling at your lips. “But it fits you. I see why you like it.” You remember him back in the park, taking careful pictures of the aster bush and of your hands…and then offering to take one of you. You don’t know why that last one makes your stomach jump.
“I thought you might like it.” Johnny’s eyes linger on your face as he observes your reaction to the paintings. He’s seen these flowers probably a hundred times by now in this permanent exhibit, but the wonder in your expression is new to him.
You both walk through a few more exhibitions after that, all with different subjects and mediums—some consist of sculptures, others are clay vases and figures. There’s still a lot to see in the museum, but you’re starting to get hungry, and you know Johnny has already heard your stomach growling.
After the 2nd time it happens and you think you might melt from embarrassment, he grins at you and makes a suggestion. “Let’s go to my office. I’ll get my things and we can eat. The restaurant here is pretty good—or at least that’s what everyone else says…”
When you get to his office, you feel almost like you’ve stepped into a room from years past. Your gaze drifts across his desk immediately; it’s not sleek and modern like you’d expect, considering the rest of the museum’s aesthetic, but wooden and heavy and vintage-looking. It’s olden quality resembles everything else in his personal space. Even his desk chair, a big and plush thing, feels vintage with its soft leather and rustic design.
This feeling is far from a bad thing, though. You enjoy the aged look of the bookcases, the picture frames, the chairs, the small decorations here and there—everything about this room.
Johnny notices how you look around, studying everything in sight, and smiles. “It’s not the most modern, but I like it.”
“It’s perfect. Like a world of its own.”
“A woman of taste, I see.” Johnny puts a hand over his heart, giving an expression like he’s truly touched, and you can only grin sheepishly. When he has his belongings, he leads you out and locks the door behind him.
“Let’s see what they have on the menu today, then.”
You get dinner at the museum’s restaurant, just as Johnny recommended, and he even decides to eat too. Maybe he does it so you won’t look odd being the only one eating, or because he really just wants to; he doesn’t let on. Either way, sitting across from him like this in a fancy restaurant with both of you having a nice meal feels almost like a date. You let that thought amble around for a few minutes longer before tucking it back into one of your mind’s many small niches.
“I’ll probably be digesting this for the next few weeks,” he says jokingly, pulling a mock-disappointed face at his plate.
“That sounds like the worst constipation in history.” He snorts at your comment, his eyes creasing as he laughs. You notice he has a dimple when he smiles, and your grin mirrors his. You don’t think you’ve seen him laugh quite so genuinely before, but now that you’ve experienced it, you want to hear it again and again.
Anything is preferable to the perpetual gloom, always slinking around the corner.
When Johnny gets back home after dropping you off at the university, he undresses himself and showers and pulls on his bedclothes, which are nothing more than his underwear and a pair of sweatpants. His upper canines ache in his gums the entire time he goes through these motions, like two pulses of red-hot heat positioned on either side of his mouth.
He takes a blood bag from the fridge and drinks it in bed, leaning his arms against his knees. A sudden remembrance manifests itself in his mind; he hears the hazy echo of his mother’s decades-past voice in his head, reprimanding him for eating in bed. A sharp pain grips his chest, and he tries to send it back to the depths where it belongs.
When the blood hits his stomach, the pain is eclipsed by the bloodlust, which is no better. His fangs drop immediately, spiking into his lower lip. Johnny closes his eyes and, very gingerly, allows himself to draw a picture of you in his mind, of your blood in his mouth and your heartbeat roaring in his ears. The way your blood would flow out so delicately, crashing into his tastebuds like the high tide. He is usually better than this at curtailing his bloodlust, not even letting it reach the point of his canines hurting—he can’t remember the last time that’s happened—but being around you sets him on edge. Awakens him in some strange, raw way.
That only makes him more wary. And more guilty about imagining himself drinking your blood. He shouldn’t even be around you if he’s losing his grip on his hard-won control. But although it makes him feel ashamed, it also causes his heart to rush.
He drains the blood bag to the last possible drop. To his relief, it calms him significantly, though the thoughts of you don’t leave. More innocent ones now, of your outing earlier in the evening. Deep beneath, they are tinged with his ever-present guilt at his vampiric nature.
Johnny doesn’t need the sleep, but he drifts off anyway, if only to quiet the conflict sending daggers into his mind.
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You’ve known Johnny for a few weeks now, not counting the time you spent silently staring at him in the café, but you find yourself intertwining yourself further into his life. You end up visiting his apartment sooner than you anticipated. You didn’t think of anything as ridiculous as him living in a coffin or sleeping in the rafters like a bat, but you also had a hard time imagining what his place might look like.
You come over on a weekend when you have more time to simply hang out and not worry so much about anything else.
Like usual, he waits in that spot on the side of the street for you to come out. In the daytime, you’re more apprehensive about him being here and someone potentially seeing him and trying to cause trouble for him, but there’s a part of you that likes the rebellious aspect of it. And if he truly doesn’t mind coming near the campus to pick you up, you don’t have much issue with him doing it.
Johnny’s apartment is clean—and a little sparser than you’d expected. Maybe he’s a fan of minimalism. One side of the wall is taken up by a wide bookcase, which features a bunch of different knickknacks, books, and a collection of larger hardcovers that look like photo albums. On the other walls are a few framed pictures of different scenes, and you assume they’re ones he must’ve taken.
“This is a nice place,” you say as he takes your jacket for you and puts it up. “It must cost quite a bit, too…” You sit down on the couch, stroking the soft material of it.
Johnny shrugs. “Thanks. It’s nothing I can’t handle...being nearly a century old gives you plenty of time to save money.” He appears charmingly self-satisfied when he’s able to make you laugh. “Do you want anything?”
“Water is fine…thank you.” Johnny nods and goes off to the kitchen.
Despite trying to keep your eyes on the wall photos, your gaze follows him as he leaves. You discreetly watch him move around his kitchen. With his dark clothes, he’s like a splash of black paint against the pale tile and stainless steel.
There are blood packs in Johnny’s fridge. Lots of them. You know because you saw them from your vantage point on the couch when he opened the fridge door. They look like the blood bags you’d see in a hospital, which makes you wonder how he even gets access to those. Another mystery you struggle to wrap your head around.
He comes back to the living room with your water, and you take it gratefully, though you also feel a little awkward. You think maybe the blood bags are something you shouldn’t have seen, although you know he probably would’ve made more effort to hide them or put them away if that were the case.
“You have a good supply of blood, a nice apartment, and a great job. Does every vampire get these kinds of perks?” Admittedly, it sounded better in your head. Your attempt to stave off the awkward feeling—which was really only coming from your end—only makes it more intense. Johnny laughs dryly in response. You can’t tell if he actually finds it amusing or is just trying to humor you, which makes you feel incredibly silly.
“All of it’s government-issued if you promise never to bite any humans.” Johnny gives a wry smile. “But it’s a mistake to think vampires live glamorous lives, filling up on blood and having no cares in the world.”
“N-no, I get it,” you stutter. “Bad joke.”
“I’m not trying to embarrass you or be mean. It’s just the way things are.” Your roles are suddenly reversed, and now he seems to feel some sort of sympathy for you, like you’re just an ignorant little human who doesn’t know any better. The last part of that is more your insecurities speaking out than anything else, but you try to ignore that and take him for his word.
Johnny gets up from the couch to go over to the bookcase as you sip your water. After looking through the photo albums intently, he takes one off the shelf and hands it to you. You set your water down and hold the album carefully as you open the front cover. The cover itself has a neat little label that reads Telluride 1976 - 1980, so you can already expect what you’ll find in it. There are numerous photos of trees, bushes, snowy mountain ranges, lakes, brilliantly vibrant flowers, and woodland creatures. You stop at a picture of a deer looking straight ahead, its black eyes wide and curious as it examines the lens.
“I lived in the mountains back then, a little after my mentor had left. I spent some time trying to reconnect with nature...and all that other hippie shit people used to do back in that era.”
You chuckle. “Did you wear the same kinds of clothes, too? Bell bottoms and tie-dye T-shirts and all?”
Johnny laughs and shrugs. “Maybe…but that’s only for me to know.”
You grin and look at the photos again. “Well…did your plan work, at least?”
Johnny gives a wistful smile. “In some ways, I think it did.”
You continue looking through the rest of the album, which you could probably do for hours if you had the time—just sit and trace every possible line, curve, and ray of light. Johnny sits beside you as you do, occasionally explaining some pictures and their backstories.
“Lately, I’ve been wanting something else to take pictures of...someone else, maybe.”
“What, like a subject?” you ask.
“Yeah, it’d be nice...I haven’t taken pictures of another person in a while.”
You nod quietly as you flip through the pages—another possible hint flying right over your head. Then a thought comes to you—one that makes your skin warm. “Have you ever taken pictures of anyone you were...involved with?” You don’t say it directly, but you hope he can get the gist of what you’re asking.
Johnny nods as if he doesn’t want to admit to it, a nervous smile gracing his lips. “A few different people…but I always gave them the pictures after we, you know, stopped seeing each other...so there’s none left here.”
“I see…” For a few moments, your thoughts circle around that concept. What was it like to bare yourself in front of someone else like that, immortalized on film? What might it be like to allow Johnny to see you like that, to take pictures of you in your most vulnerable form? The idea doesn’t make you as downright anxious as you expected it to, though you can’t completely shake the lingering embarrassment about it.
After you finish looking through the entirety of his Telluride adventures, Johnny shows you some recent pictures he’s developed, and you’re giddy to see your own blurry creations among them. Now that you’re holding them physically in your hands, you can agree that they look nice, each with its own little personality.
“I thought about putting them in a new photo album,” he says, “but you can keep them, if you prefer.”
You hold them to your chest. “Yes, I’d like to keep them. Thank you.” You smile. “I’m sure I’ll leave you with plenty other photos to put in your album, anyway.”
The sun is close to setting again. You aren’t ready to leave yet, though, and Johnny is content to let you stay longer. He pulls out another album for you to look at, this one dated with 1960 - 1964. Unlike the others, there’s no title to describe what’s in it except for that year range.
“This is a picture of me someone took before I was turned,” Johnny murmurs, sitting back down beside you. He turns the album to you, and in the middle of the first page is a sepia-toned photo of him sitting on a bed—or maybe a couch?—wearing a suit. White, handwritten lettering on the bottom right of the photograph reads August 4, 1960.
“Oh wow...” You touch the photo gently over its protective lining. “You look exactly the same. Of course.”
“It’s the only photo I have left of myself,” he sighs, leaning back on the sofa. “If it weren’t for that...I’d feel almost like I didn’t exist at all.”
“Do you remember this day?” you ask.
“…Vaguely.” His answer doesn’t feel like the whole truth, and the way his eyes dart anxiously as he says it confirms your suspicions. Then he sighs again, heavier this time, and he seems to be exhaling all 60 years of his burden along with it. “I was...going to be married. It was for our wedding shoot.”
You’re surprised for a reason you’re unsure of, never even imagining that Johnny could’ve been married at one point in time. Could’ve had an entire life and a family, if it hadn’t been for...
“I’m sorry, Johnny.” You know you never would’ve met him if things hadn’t happened this way, and that knowledge tugs at your heart in a way that makes you feel intensely selfish.
Johnny shakes his head and avoids your eyes. “It was long ago.” He wets his lips and his jaw clenches like maybe he wants to say something else, but he remains silent for a while.
You continue exploring the photo album in silence. With its thin size, there aren’t as many pictures in it as the others—much less, in fact, but each one is still enough to keep your interest. Your mind keeps drifting back to the one of Johnny.
You hand the album back to him when you’re done. He takes it from you, but in a gesture you don’t foresee, he allows your hands to touch for the first time. You make a tiny flinch at the unexpected coolness—not ice-cold, but enough to be noticeable—but you don’t draw away from him. You let his fingers slide across yours as the photo album leaves your hands, and it sends electricity racing up and down your spine.
“S-sorry.” You’re not sure if you’re apologizing for flinching or for making contact at all, though there is no reason to because he initiated it.
“Doesn’t it ever disturb you at all that I’m not human?” Johnny asks softly, still holding the album.
“What?”
“You’ve taken all this so easily...much more easily than many others. You aren’t even disgusted at my cold hands.” A ghost of a grin comes over his face.
“If I were disgusted, I wouldn’t even be here,” you say, trying to lighten the tension. It’s not the kind of tension that arises from anger, offense, or upset, but something else that you are lost on comprehending in this moment. “Some of it’s unfamiliar, obviously, but I’m not disgusted.”
He glances down at the album in his hands, as if contemplating something. Maybe thinking about the only living photo of himself beneath the cover. Or maybe he’s thinking back to how he was turned in the first place and subsequently lost the life he was about to have. He still hasn’t told you anything about how he became a vampire, and though you’d like to know, it’s obviously a sore spot for him.
Eventually, he nods, willing himself to smile at you. “I’m glad.”
Night has fallen by the time you’re done exploring the decades of his life, though there is still much you haven’t seen and don’t yet know. You let him drive you back to the school as you stare out at the passing cars, wondering how many more of these people sitting in their vehicles are nonhuman and you’d never know it.
You hesitate after he pulls up across from the main gate.
“What’s wrong?” he asks.
“Uh, nothing really, it’s just—I still don’t have your number or anything.” And I want to talk to you more often. I want to hear your voice more often. You don’t want to say anything overly dramatic or cheesy, so you just keep those last thoughts to yourself.
Thinking it had been something serious, he smirks at your concern. “Oh, I see. I’ll give it to you now, then.”
Once your numbers are safely in each other’s phones, you finally bid each other goodnight. 
Though you try to steer your thoughts towards other things, you keep veering back to Johnny. His apartment. His fridge full of blood bags. His photo albums full of years of history. Even when you get into bed that night, you can’t keep him off your mind.
You wake up gasping and sweating when you dream of him with his fangs in your neck, your own blood running down your neck and chest. You glance over at your roommate to make sure you haven’t woken her and rest your head on your knees, trying to catch your breath and settle your racing heart. Your skin still prickles with how you could practically feel his heated breaths on your neck, ice-cold hands gripping your shoulders.
The worst part of it is that you can’t quite say you completely disliked it.
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“It doesn’t make much sense to have a Halloween party and dress up as the very beings that you hate, but whatever…” you mumble, looking through a rack of costumes with a certain impassivity. You’re not very enthusiastic about going to this Halloween party, but your friend refuses to go alone. You haven’t been spending as much time with her anymore—partly because of Johnny and partly because you feel even more out of place around her than normal—and with all her begging and pleading, she refuses to let you opt out of this one.
“It’s about having fun, no one really cares Y/N. They’re freaks, aren’t they? That’s why people dress up as them, they’re practically meant for this.”
You become even more apprehensive about the party after hearing that, if that’s even possible. You smooth your hand over the fabric of a witch’s robe and sigh again, shaking your head. It doesn’t feel quite right to keep spending time in her presence—or anyone else who goes to your school—but you feel trapped on all sides, left without much of a choice. You would never hear the end of it if you tried to switch universities…or even drop out.
Your mind strays back to Johnny as always, with his melancholy aura and weird jokes and pretty pictures and monochrome clothes. The smell of his cologne, the lingering scent of roasted coffee beans, and his toothy smile, when he does show it to you. Something in you makes you want to drop everything you’re doing right now and go to him. It might even be nice to settle in his arms, feel them strong and solid around you—though he’d probably need just as much comforting as you.
“Dress up as this!” Your friend breaks the reverie as she prances over to you with a pair of fake fangs, the tips of them painted in acrylic blood. She holds them up to your mouth, and you struggle to manage a smile, if only to sate her enthusiasm. “It actually reminds me of…that vampire at the café. Say, have you seen him since then?”
You shake your head, moving away to sift through another rack of outfits as you try to maintain a detached expression. “Nope, not a glimpse. Haven’t even thought about him.”
When your friend doesn’t suspect anything, you let your expression drop just a tad, breathing out quietly.
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The night of the party, the full moon is heavy and bold against the black blanket of the sky, which feels horribly cliché. You wonder if there are any werewolves out tonight, and what they might be doing right now.
“We’re going to have a good time tonight,” your friend insists as you both walk up the front steps of the host’s house. It’s someone you only vaguely know, a friend of a friend of a friend, but clearly a person who has an abundance of money judging by this expansive home. You don’t know why she feels the need to convince you, but maybe it’s because you haven’t seemed very enthusiastic so far. You only give a thumbs up to her words, which feels like an unconvincing gesture. Luckily for you, it works.
After a few hours, the party is still going strong but your head is starting to hurt from the music, and you’re growing weary of all the men crowding in too close, looking at you in your angel costume like you’re something to be devoured. You’ve rolled your eyes at way too many of them and their haphazardly put-together costumes, dressed up as vampires with terrible fake fangs or werewolves with manes of matted up fur.
Your friend keeps flitting around the party, talking to whoever she recognizes from classes or campus organizations, and you’ve given up on trying to follow her around any longer. Every time you turn around, she’s somewhere else. Noticing that you’re currently solo, a guy from one of your history classes comes up to you and begins what he thinks is an interesting conversation on how angels actually look more like Eldritch abominations than the cherubic humans depicted in paintings—so your costume is “technically inaccurate” —and your eyes glaze over as you pretend to listen to him.
You eventually manage to get away from him and get to an undisturbed corner, wedged next to two girls drinking cider and critically rating all the guys’ costumes. You pull your phone out and think about calling for a ride back to campus, but your thumb hovers over the message icon. You press it without thinking too much about it, and Johnny’s name appears as one of your most recent conversations. Though you feel somewhat nervous, you will yourself to open the box and begin typing.
To: Hi Johnny. I hope I’m not bothering you, but can I come over? 🙏🏿🙏🏿🙏🏿 I’m over this party
You put your phone back in your purse, trying not to get your hopes up for a quick response. You know there’s a good chance he’d still be awake at this time of night since he doesn’t need to sleep, but he has his own life and is probably off doing...vampire-y things. Whatever those things could be.
However, your hopes are met when your phone pings only a couple minutes later.
From: Of course. You’re not scared about spending your Halloween with a vampire? 😏
You smile at that.
To: I think I’ll be fine…as long as you don’t bite me.
From: 🦷🩸
You get to Johnny’s studio apartment not too long after, and you hang around outside his door for a few moments before knocking, suddenly feeling bashful about your costume. Maybe you should’ve changed before coming over here; what if he thinks it’s childish? Or maybe too revealing? Does he even care about that kind of stuff? Doesn’t matter now, though. You’re here, and there’s no way you’re turning back around.
He answers a few seconds after you knock, wearing a sweater and black pants. You notice his sweater is a cream color and not the usual black. He looks a little surprised to see your costume, and his Adam’s apple bobs as he swallows.
“Wow, you look pretty. Nice of you to visit me after falling straight from Heaven.” You cringe at his cheesy line, though you also cannot deny that you secretly enjoy every bit of it.
“Thanks, Johnny...” you say timidly, stepping into his home as he lets you in. “Nice work with changing up the color scheme.”
He’s confused for a moment before realizing you’re talking about his clothes. “Oh yeah, that...um, haha. Thanks.”
Unbeknownst to you, the back of his mind is buzzing with a form of excitement he hasn’t felt in a while. Not the clawing, frantic spikes of bloodlust, but a more physical kind of desire. It’s pleasurable, but he also feels guilty about pining over how sweet and innocent you look in your all-white outfit, stockings hugging your legs perfectly and your dress just short enough to tempt the imagination. Really, you’ve painted a picture of perfect purity, and the only thing he can think about is ruining you. Putting his hands on you and peeling your dress off to reveal the soft skin underneath.
He casts those thoughts aside as you sit prettily on his couch, legs crossed at the ankles—though it’s hard to do so. “Do you want something to drink? Or eat? There isn’t a whole lot of food here, but I can order something…”
“Do you ever make your own coffee?” The question seems a bit random at first, and you try to explain. “You know, since you always get it from the café.”
Johnny smiles. “Do you want coffee? I can make it.”
You nod. “That would be nice…whatever you have.”
“I pretty much have your usual order memorized by now, so I should be good on making it.” Johnny walks to the kitchen. “You can look through the albums while you’re in there. The ones you haven’t seen yet.”
“Oh, thanks.” You feel a little nervous to be looking through the shelf of his treasured photo albums by yourself, but you’re also glad he trusts you enough to let you do it. It makes you feel important. Maybe even important to him, as silly as that might sound.
It isn’t long before the scent of coffee wafts out into the living room. Johnny returns soon with two cups of it, and just as he promised, yours is made just the way you like it.
“Thank you.” You set the album back on the shelf and take the cup from Johnny. For a while, both of you talk of nothing important—just filling the space with the details of your days.
“So how was the party?” Johnny finally asks, and he raises his eyebrows as he scans your outfit again. You grin halfheartedly.
“It was…alright. Kinda weird. I think it’d be more fun if I went to a regular university, but you know…”
Johnny shakes his head. “I can’t blame you for bailing out.”
“Yeah…I’ve been to college parties before, but the Halloween theme was a bit…”
“Strange for an institution that bans all supernatural beings?” Johnny finishes your sentence. He doesn’t look offended or irritated by it—only slightly amused.
You shrug, biting your lip. “Yeah, that.”
“Well, look on the bright side. I wouldn’t have gotten to see you in your natural form otherwise.”
This one almost goes over your head, too, but you catch it just in time. Johnny’s compliments make you feel warm all over, like you’re sitting under the sun. You grin and look down into your cup of coffee, unused to receiving such bold praise and unsure how to respond to it. Something pops into your mind, though, and you think it might be a good idea to run with it.
“You could...take a picture of me, you know. If you want to...since I’m all dressed up now anyway.” You meet his eyes only for a second and then look away, twisting the mug in your hands.
Johnny sits up a little straighter at your words, trying to catch your eyes, though you don’t hold his gaze for long. “You’re sure?” he asks.
“I’m sure. Go ahead! Before I change my mind.” You laugh nervously and carefully set your half-empty mug on the table.
Johnny’s camera is never too far away from him, so he grabs it and plays with the settings for a bit before looking back to you, a small smile on his face. “I’m gonna start, okay?” His voice is surprisingly soft. This, yet again, reminds you of him and the aster bush. He acts as if you might run away at the first shutter click, which makes you feel babied, but you don’t totally hate it.
The first few photos are a little awkward—at least to you. You aren’t sure how to pose, or if you should try to look more casual, though Johnny assures you you’re doing well. He gives you directives throughout, telling you to look in his direction or angle your face a certain way, and you follow his instructions to the best of your ability.
At one point, one of your dress straps slips down. When you go to fix it, Johnny says, “Wait. Could you keep it like that?”
You look at him, your body heating from the suggestion.
“Is that okay with you?”
“…Yes.” Your throat is dry, and your body reacts in a way you don’t expect—little nervous thrills in your hands and feet, though you try to internally explain it away as the coffee’s effects. Johnny takes a few more photos like this, and then he steps closer to gently touch your chin, guiding your face to the angle he’s looking for.
“So good for me.” It slips past his lips in a reverential murmur before he can really consider what he’s saying, and you both freeze. Your heart rate increases, and you wonder if he can hear how hard the red organ is beating in your chest. Probably.
You want to hear him say it again.
Johnny laughs awkwardly, his hand coming back to his side almost a little too quickly to be natural. “Um, I’m really sorry. That was a bit...”
“It…it’s fine.” You avoid his eyes. Johnny takes a few more photos, but the set of his mouth is a little tight, as if he’s stressed about something. Or regretting what he let slip, maybe. You want to tell him you really don’t feel bad about it, but you aren’t sure how to do that without making things more awkward…or revealing your true desires.
When Johnny has taken enough pictures of you to be satisfied with, he sits next to you on the couch, setting his camera on the coffee table and looking suddenly timid.
“I can’t wait to see them,” you say, attempting to break the tension that never really cleared the room after his earlier comment. He blinks for a moment like he doesn’t know what you mean, and then realizes—obviously, he’ll be developing the photos.
“They’ll come out nice, I’m sure. I think you’ll photograph well.”
“Thank you,” you murmur, and now it’s your turn to be unsure of how to resurrect the conversation.
“You’re beautiful.” It’s an abrupt comment. It makes your stomach twist in a pleasant, fluttery way, and you become hyperaware of his form sitting next to yours.
“Haven’t heard that one much, but thanks.”
Johnny turns to you. “Anyone who’d think otherwise is a fool.”
There’s a pause after this where you both simply study each other, watching for hidden reactions that can’t be read on the surface. The way he says it is…decisive, assured. But it also manages to be tender, as if he needs you to know what he thinks of you. Needs you to see yourself the way he does—the same way you do for him. You don’t know where the confidence comes from, but maybe his tone and his words and his endlessly dark eyes have pulled it out of you. “I want to kiss you.”
Johnny’s lips part. “Are you certain?”
“I’m certain.”
He doesn’t hesitate anymore. Johnny moves closer to you and cups the back of your neck. Something awakens in his eyes in the seconds before he presses his mouth to yours. Though he wants to drink eagerly from your lips, his kiss is languid to avoid overwhelming you, and there is an audible smack of your lips whenever he pulls away and presses back in.
His mouth tastes like the coffee you just drank, but underneath that you swear you can taste a hint of the deep iron of blood, and you don’t know how to feel about that. You think about what his fangs would feel like scraping against your bottom lip, if he’d ever show them to you, and you moan quietly.
“Do you want this? With me?” Johnny confirms once more, pulling his gaze away from your lips and up to your eyes. His own eyes are yearning, but there is also an element of something like fear roiling in them. As if you’d turn him away, even though you’ve already shown your desire for him.
“Yes. Just you. No one else.”
Johnny’s body gravitates towards yours, and you think he’s going to push you down onto the sofa, but he scoops your legs up and carries you to his bedroom instead. Even his hands on your waist and legs makes you burn inside.
This is the first time you've seen his bedroom. The sheets are cloud-soft when he sets you down on them, and his window lets moonlight shine through the open blinds and scatter in thick beams across the floor. The only other light source is the bedside lamp, which emits a comfortable yellowish glow.
Johnny joins you on the bed and lets you climb into his lap—encourages you to do so. His cool hands pulling at your thighs as you settle them on either side of his waist makes tingles go through your body. You don’t hesitate to bring your lips back together, kissing each other deeply as one of his hands cradles the back of your head and the other settles on the small of your back.
You are certain vampires don’t have any powers of enchantment—that’s for magic wielders. And yet, you feel like you’ve been put in a trance by his kisses alone, and you wonder how you could’ve lived this long without knowing how his lips feel—how they fit perfectly against your own. As if everything up to now has purposely led you together.
You shift in Johnny’s embrace, and the movement causes his thigh to slide between your legs. Your heat is pressed against his thigh directly now, your silken panties catching against the denim of his pants. You murmur against his lips, not really saying anything of substance but wanting to vocalize your desire to him. Johnny’s hand tightens slightly on your back, and he experimentally lifts his leg higher and slides his thigh across you. That draws a gasp from you.
Noticing your positive response, Johnny continues rocking his thigh up against your pussy and kissing you until you’re breathless and your nipples are straining against the fabric of your dress. You pull away from him for a moment to try to ground yourself, feeling like your nerves are already being singed with fiery pleasure. Johnny’s face is noticeably more flushed than before, but he also looks much more composed than you feel at the moment.
“It takes longer to get hard,” he explains, as if reading the lingering question in your own expression. “Since...you know. Slow blood.” You rock your hips over his thigh more enthusiastically, motivated to get him hard underneath you, and you listen to his choppy breaths as you move. Your movements aren’t the smoothest, but he helps you guide your hips in a way that feels good for you both. You’ve never been with anyone before, so it doesn’t much matter to you how long or quick it takes for him to get there as long as he does.
Feeling the bulge grow underneath you excites you. Johnny groans against your lips as you kiss him and rub yourself over his member. The sound comes from somewhere deep inside him, as if it’s something he’s been containing for a long time. Your hand goes to his waist and tugs at his belt loops, then drifts closer to his belt buckle, pulling the leather and metal apart. Johnny pauses when you get off his lap and slide further down, grips your arms like he doesn’t want you to go. “Are…you sure? You don’t have to…if it’s too much—”
“I want to, Johnny.”
With your affirmative, he lets you kneel between his legs, pull his zipper apart, and trace your curious fingers over the bulge beneath the fabric of his underwear. Johnny loses his breath when you drag his underwear down, sliding it over the heated skin of his dick. His length is thick and long—even with him not being fully hard yet—and the tip glistens wet with precum. You weren’t sure what to expect, but this is much bigger than you think you might be able to handle. It makes your face warm and your stomach do another series of flips. Still, you want it and you want him, so you aren’t going to stop now.
You lean closer to press your lips against his shaft, leaving a few soft kisses behind. Johnny’s mouth parts when your mouth touches him.
Johnny gently holds the back of your head as you leave small licks over his shaft, tasting the salty skin on your tongue. He lets out a shaky breath as he watches you, his other hand brushing the side of your face.
“Just like that…” he murmurs, his voice heavy with lust as you circle your tongue around the thick, darkened tip, catching drops of his precum. He never takes his eyes off you, and this makes you feel a little exposed, but you continue with your actions. When you suck Johnny’s tip past your lips, his thighs tense under you, the thick muscle reacting beautifully to your actions on his body.
More precum drips from him, and you find the taste strangely pleasing. It makes you want more of him, of whatever he has to offer you. You wrap your hand around his shaft, though it doesn’t fit entirely around, and begin stroking him in a way you hope feels good.
Johnny’s hand slips over yours to guide your movements and show you how much pressure to apply, what pace to stroke him at. “Like this, baby…yes, that’s so good…” He showers you with praise as you get the hang of it, and he eventually lets your hand go so you can do it on your own, his own hand drifting back to the bed to grip the comforter.
It’s hard to quantify just how much seeing you like this turns him on, you kneeling between his legs with his cock between your lips while wearing your pretty, angelic outfit. His previous guilt about “corrupting” you descends to the very back of his mind as he savors every moment of your hands on his cock and your tongue circling his slit.
“I’m close,” he whispers. You quicken your movements on him, hollowing your cheeks tighter around his dick, and the moan he gives shoots straight between your legs.
Johnny carefully pulls your head back so you won’t choke before he comes, streams of his seed shooting into your mouth and running down his cock. Your hand still squeezes around him as he comes, and he slowly thrusts into the tight circle of your fist as you milk every drop from him. By the time he’s spent, your mouth and hand and part of the sheets are completely sticky with his release. You imagine it must have been a long time since he’s last had an orgasm.
The vampire watches intently as you swallow his cum, which causes his softening dick to throb in your hand. He takes your face in his hands and kisses you deeply, uncaring of the taste of himself in your mouth. His hair tickles your face as he kisses you feverishly, his nose bumping yours and his tongue prodding past your lips.
“Come here, angel.” Johnny pulls your body up onto the bed before you can get yourself up there first. The pet name makes warmth flood through your body, like drinking a hot chocolate at the café, except a thousand times more satisfying. Johnny’s hands are once again caressing your thighs, though this time they slide up underneath your dress and squeeze your hips. “Can I take these pretty panties off you?”
“Please.”
He hooks his fingers into the sides of them and pulls them down your legs and past your ankles. One of his hands goes underneath your dress to feel you soft and wet against his fingers, and you both moan at the same time. He slides his digits through your lips and over your clit, and him leaning forward to bring his mouth to your throat is enough to have you nearly overwhelmed. His fingers tease your entrance but don’t push inside until you nearly have to beg him.
“Please, Johnny…” You push your hips up to get his attention.
“Do you want my fingers?” he asks softly.
“Y-yes…” At your words, he eases the middle one into you, slowly enough to avoid discomfort. It feels strange to have someone else’s fingers inside you. His finger reaches further than yours can, touching you more deeply than you’ve felt before; it makes you gasp a bit too sharply.
“Are you hurt?” he asks, freezing and thinking he might’ve done something wrong.
“N-no, I’m fine. Keep going.”
Johnny’s mouth edges closer to the cleavage of your dress as he starts thrusting his finger into you, warming you up enough to take a second digit. Shakily, you bring your hands up to slide the straps down and make it easier for him, and his breath hitches when you pull the top of your dress down.
His mouth envelopes one of your nipples as he slides the second finger into you. His fingers encounter a part of you that makes you moan unexpectedly and grab onto him, a little surprised at the sudden spike of pleasure.
“You’re so pretty,” he purrs, his lips moving against the curve of your breast as he speaks. “And so responsive.”
As Johnny’s mouth and fingers work you closer to an orgasm, you marvel at how handsome he looks and how good he feels. He opens his eyes to see you staring at him, your pupils wide and mouth desperate, and he separates himself from your chest to kiss you deeply once again.
When you come around his fingers, Johnny whispers more compliments to you about how good you are and how he wants to watch you come undone because of him all the time. When he thinks you might be on the brink of overstimulation, he takes his fingers out of you, slipping them into his mouth to taste you.
“I’ll take this off now. Is that okay?” He whispers this into your ear with his hands on either side of your hips, caressing the fabric of your dress.
“I-it’s okay.”
Johnny slips your dress off, leaving you in nothing but your white sheer stockings. The sight of you sitting there on his bed, breathing heavily from your climax in your pretty thigh-highs, has his cock throbbing and rising to life once again.
“Lay back on the bed.” You do, and he settles himself between your legs like you did for him earlier. When you glance at him, his eyes are heavy and piercing. In this moment, you are acutely reminded of the fact that he is not a human, with how he looks like a beast of prey about to devour a meal. You are too nervous to look back at him for long, so you stare at the ceiling with your legs shaking from anticipation.
Johnny’s mouth on you is almost jarring in how wet it is, and you arch up into him in surprise and a rush of pleasure. He gently presses your legs back onto the bed and continues licking into you, parting your lower lips with his tongue and making your thighs tremble under his grasp.
If you had to describe it in words, you probably wouldn’t be able to. He kisses your pussy the same way he kisses you on the mouth, passionately and with more than enough tongue to satisfy. Johnny slips his fingers into you again as he curls his lips around your clit, and you moan unabashedly.
You’re quickly spiraling towards another orgasm, maybe quicker than you expected; but it makes sense with you still being so raw from the climax you just had. You gain enough courage to give another glance down at Johnny, and you see the way his other arm moves back and forth from beneath the bed, stroking himself while he eats you out. Something about that pushes you over the edge, and you cry out as you come on his tongue.
As Johnny gives you time to calm down again, he stands and finally pulls his clothes off, baring his body to you. You’re not sure if you’ve ever seen a man so beautiful.
He goes to get a condom, and your words stumble from your lips before you can psych yourself out of saying them. “I-I’m on birth control.” Johnny looks back at you, his gaze filled with something you can’t quite read. He comes closer to you, holding himself above you on the bed so his face is hovering just above yours.
“You want to feel me raw?” he whispers.
You nod under his burning stare, feeling like you’re on a high you won’t be able to get off of. “I need you, Johnny.”
Johnny climbs fully onto the bed then and positions himself between your legs. His cock is thick and heavy between his thighs as it bumps against your inner thigh and leaves a smear of precum behind. After putting some lube in his hand, he slicks himself with the sticky substance, preparing himself to fuck you open. Something deep in your abdomen shudders, and your walls clench around nothing as you watch him stroke his shaft, the squelching, wet sound of his hand on his dick loud in the quiet room.
When he’s done, he grabs your thighs and pulls you a little closer to him. “If it hurts, tell me, okay?”
“O-okay.”
The slick tip prodding at your hole makes you want more, though you are a bit afraid of how this is going to feel. When it finally pushes inside of you, you gasp. Johnny watches your face for signs of pain as he slides forward further.
With two previous orgasms and the lube to help, his cock stretches you open with some discomfort, but not the kind of sharp pain you expected. Your nails leave little half-moon shapes on Johnny’s biceps as you squeeze his arms and try to keep your lower half relaxed, wanting to take all of him in—or as much as you can manage, anyway. You try to keep your breathing even as he pushes into you slowly.
Your eyebrows crease and your mouth tightens when he slides deeper still, and he pauses. “Johnny…” You worry your lip with your teeth, feeling like you’ve been stuffed to the brim—and he’s not even all the way in yet.
“Do you want me to stop?”
“No,” you beg, maintaining your grip on his arms. “Just…try moving.”
Johnny pulls out and slowly thrusts back in again, angling his dick to find that sensitive spot within you. Your mouth falls open silently when he does; this feels much, much different from his fingers. This is better.
Johnny repeats the movement, being mindful not to push himself too deep—only enough for you to handle. Beneath him, your body begins unwinding at the pleasure he’s delivering to you, and your eyes flutter closed as the ecstasy takes over your mind. One of his hands goes to tease your clit as he settles into a good rhythm, and you cry out at the extra dose of pleasure.
“You’re taking me so well,” Johnny mumbles as he sits back and watches himself slide into you, both of your lower halves slick from lube and your own wetness. “So warm and wet, angel…” You can tell he’s using a lot of his energy to keep his pace controlled and gentle enough for you to actually enjoy. The idea of being fucked harder makes you ache deep inside, but you figure it’s best to save that for when you’re more used to this. You already know it’ll be difficult to walk in the morning after this.
Johnny leans forward to kiss your lips, changing the angle again and circling his pelvis into you, and a choked gasp escapes your mouth at the slow wind of his hips.
Johnny lavishes your neck and throat with kisses, and though he is a vampire, you aren’t worried about him biting you. His fangs have not made an appearance since all this started, and you doubt if he would ever bring them out in front of you. You don’t know if you should ask about it, either, wondering if it’s too soon after only a month and a half of knowing each other—but maybe you could say the same about him being inside of you right now.
“Johnny…” you whisper into the air, your fingers scrabbling against his sweaty skin. The mounting tension in your abdomen is close to snapping, and you are almost frightened by how intense it already feels. He moves his face from your neck to be face-to-face with you again and plants a heavy, dizzying kiss on your lips.
“It’s okay,” he murmurs against your kiss-swollen lips. “I’ve got you, Y/N.”
Falling apart in Johnny’s arms feels like a form of Heaven that’s meant to be kept hidden, because you might become addicted to it otherwise. Your inner muscles squeeze around his dick as you come. His name flows from your lips in a high song. You can’t imagine any physical sensation that could be better than this, his hips rocking into you as you tighten and cream around him, and you know innately that Johnny has ruined all chances of you ever feeling this fulfilled with anyone but him.
The constant pulse of your walls against his dick is too much to withstand for long, and Johnny’s muscles pull taut with pleasure when he comes, groaning into your neck and spilling overflowing streams of thick cum into you. His hips falter in their former rhythm, and he resists the urge to push himself as deep as he can into you.
When he pulls out, you whine from the discomfort of it, but also because you wish he could stay in you forever. You know you’ll be sore when you wake up—and you can already feel the very beginnings of exhaustion and ache settling in your body—but you’d do it a hundred times over without changing a thing.
Johnny curls himself around you after he’s cleaned the both of you up, as if he means to shield you from the world. You’re quiet for a while as you listen to his slow-beating heart and feel his cool skin against yours.
You look up at his face, which is hard to see distinctly in the dark of the room. With the lamp turned out, the only source of light comes from the moon now, but you can decipher enough to make out the shape of his lips and his glittering eyes. You know he can see much better than you in this light, and he takes his time tracing his fingers across your face and cheek, studying your features.
“Would you ever…make me a vampire?”
His body tenses at your question. “Don’t say anything ridiculous. You still have a whole life ahead of you to live. What I have here...this is no existence.” He’s not mad, at least not at you, but his voice hardens at the very idea of it.
“But what if I wanted to live it with you?”
Johnny takes a breath, but he doesn’t say anything to that. He just continues stroking your face and looks at you for a long time, like he’s searching for something. You don’t know if you truly expected an answer from him, or how you would feel if he did give one.
Eventually, your eyes begin to fall low, and sleep overcomes you. The last thing you register is Johnny’s chilly hand touching your cheek. When he notices you’ve drifted off, he pulls the covers tighter around you both. Then he presses you to his chest as he tunes out the sound of cars rumbling on the streets below in exchange for the beating of your heart—still alive, so red with blood.
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blackbat05 · 3 years
Text
Day by Day
Shangqi x Reader 
A/N: My love for this man has hit an all time high so let me capitalize on it while I still can! If you read everything, I sincerely thank you for doing so!!! And holy cow 2 fics in 2 days have I gone back into my prime days? 
Genre: PG-13
Notes: As the title mentioned, I’ll probably set it some time after endgame. You could see it as a prequel to my first post! Reader is a social worker and she’s just dealing with all the mess that the snap bought back. The reader’s name as Jen Lee. I also apologize in advance for the potentially long fic. 
***
‘Excuse me, I’m looking for my child? Her name’s Wang Yiman and she’s seven.’ Another frazzled-looking parent fought her way to the front of the receptionist, approaching the helpless intern who looked like she was going to be on the verge of tears if another request came in. 
‘I got this,’ a hand calmly reassured the young intern as she beckoned the relief parent. ‘Mrs Wang? My name is Jen Lee and I’m the social worker here.’ I offered my hand for the anxious mother. ‘Oh thank god! Is Yiman ok? She must have been so scared!’ I slowed to a stop outside the room at the end of the corridor, gently sitting her down. 
‘Yiman has been a very brave girl Mrs Wang, but I will not lie to you. The sudden disappearance of their parents has traumatized a lot of kids. We’ve managed to explain to them what was going on but they will need a lot of support.’ I gave a glance over Mrs Wang’s shoulder, nodding to my colleague, Tammy who was holding the hand of a little girl in pigtails and a floral dress. 
妈妈! mā ma (mommy!)
The young girl ran into her mother’s open arms, allowing the floodgates to open from both ends. I turn to Tammy as we shared a silent agreement to leave the area. ‘That’s the last one for the day,’ Tammy unceremoniously plops herself onto the chair, letting out a groan. ‘Thanks for your hard work Jen.’ 
‘Right back at you.’ I entered the last bit of paperwork before uploading Yiman’s case file onto the portal. Yiman’s reunion with her parents meant the Children and Youth Centre were halfway in getting every displaced child back to their parents. Looking at the dingy television that was hung on the walls at the waiting room, despite not being able to hear anything, it didn’t take a genius to figure out what was going on. S.W.O.R.D was apparently in a stand-off against Wanda Maximoff? Reported rumors that Sam Wilson didn’t want anything to do with the shield? It’s been a crazy few weeks but that was utter- 
‘Bullshit! If anything it’s the government. They must have psyched him into giving up the shield.’ My chair swiveled to face Tammy who returned a nonchalant shrug. ‘What? You know I’m right. Doesn’t matter if half the world’s gone or our universe gets split into two - they’re the true evil here. I’m still struggling to find a place after I found a couple making out in my apartment! And you know what the global repatriation council told me? We’re only dealing with urgent cases right now. Well I say f-’
The incessant ringing of the bell interrupted our conversation, replacing Tammy’s tirade into a cheeky grin. ‘Look who’s here!’ 
Shangqi stands behind the counter, dressed in his usual red varsity jacket and jeans, holding bags of what I could only make out as takeout from the Chinese restaurant that was run by a friendly Singaporean couple. ‘Did I interrupt something?’ He scratches his head nervously. ‘Nope, in fact you just saved me from Tammy’s monologue, any further and she’ll explicitly tell me what she saw in her apartment when she got dusted back that day,’ I shivered in mock fear. ‘Still haunts me up till today.’ Tammy meets us by the door, bag in her hand. 
‘I thought you were staying? We got fried dumplings and 泡饭  pào fàn (poached rice).’ 
‘Last minute duty - A parent called, gotta run! Enjoy your dinner date.’ She waggles her eyebrows suggestively, much to our embarrassment. ‘What? It’s not...’ Shangqi stutters, trying to form intelligible sentences. ‘Get out before I throw a fried dumpling at your face Tammy!’ She winks at me, before darting out of the door. Once my nosy colleague was out, I turn towards a red-faced Shangqi. ‘I’m so sorry... just don’t mind her.’ 
‘Huh?’ The man was knocked out of his stupor. ‘Oh yeah... sure,’ in an attempt to forget everything that had just happened, he opened the packets of fried dumplings. ‘Ready for war?’ 
‘I was born ready.’ 
Thirty-five minutes later, all that was left were the remnants of fried dumplings and three empty containers. 
‘This should be illegal,’ I patted my stomach in satisfaction to his amusement. ‘Laugh at yourself! You lost track of how many dumplings you had and ended up taking my share!’ 
Raising his hands in defeat, Shangqi starts to clear the table up. ‘So how’s the center? Everything alright?’ I nodded numbly. 
The past five years had been a blur. Hazy, even. All I remembered was a kid running into the office telling me that half of the staff disappeared during a school holiday program that we were running with a dozen other kids. Parents who survived the snap rushed to our center, demanding to see their children. We couldn’t give them any answer as we too, were equally perplexed. Maybe the only thing that made sense was Shangqi and Katy bursting into the center to help us with the chaos. 
Coming back from what could be the 1000th phone call, I got a glimpse in the children’s playroom where the five years old kids were at, treating myself to an amusing sight. They all had red cloths draped around their neck, each holding a stick that was from the abandoned prop box. Katy wasn’t spared to as she was wearing her own red cloth that seemed a few sizes to small for her. Not that she didn’t seem to mind. 
‘Alright my warriors! Chargeeeeee!!!!!!’ 
In unison, little pairs of feet pattered across the room towards their ‘enemy’, a cardboard cutout of a monstrous creature who was really just Shangqi in disguise. 
‘RAWR! I’ll eat anyone who stands in my way!’ He stands up, mimicking a dinosaur that was about to trample an entire city. I decided that the paperwork could wait, standing near the door to watch an Oscar-worthy performance. With great effort and bravery from the kids, they finally managed to take down 5 foot 10 worth of muscle. 
‘Again! Again!’ 
I chuckled upon seeing Shangqi on the floor, about to drift off into wonderland. It was time for me to step in. ‘Alright kids that’s enough for today! Dinner’s here.’  As the kids dispersed with the help of Katy, it was just the two of us left to clear up the mess. ‘Thank you so much, both of you. I honestly can’t think of what would happen if you guys didn’t come to help.’ 
Perhaps my body language was screaming ‘I’m dead tired, please just knock me out’ as Shangqi takes a cloth from me, folding it back into the box. ‘It’s what we would have done, this place, it means a lot to us - to me.’ 
A small knock on the door diverts our attention away from the trash. Little Yiman stands at the door, as she stares at the both of us with big round eyes. 
‘Yiman, it’s late, what are you doing here?’ I squat down to her eye level. The little girl beams, ‘ 妈妈 said that I could give this to you!’ She passes me a juice box together with a handmade card with colorful scribbles. Maybe I was carrying too much on my shoulders, as I suddenly felt a boulder lifted off me. ‘Thank you,’ I smile at her sweetly, ‘I love apple juice.’ Happy with the response, she runs to Shangqi. ‘Shangqi 哥哥 gē ge (brother)!’ 
He breaks out into a smile, opening his arms wide. Yiman nuzzles her head into his shoulder before breaking out into uncontrollable giggles from his sudden attack of tickles. ‘Are you hear to help Miss Jen?’ I took the trash from his hands, giving him some time with the girl. 
‘Yes I am. Miss Jen needs some help so I’m here today!’ 
‘Are you her boyfriend?’ 
Shangqi freezes on the spot. He had undergone what could be the toughest training by his father, fought the greatest assassins in the world and here he was - stumped by a question from a seven year old. ‘Well... I’m her close friend since when we were very young,’ Yiman looks at him expectantly. ‘She helped me when I was in trouble so I had to be a good friend when she was in trouble too.’ 
‘Like how Ningning helped me when I injured my knee?’ 
‘Yeah... something like that.’ He breathes a sigh of relief, thankful to escape his first crisis. Honestly, he wasn’t even sure if he was telling himself the truth. 
‘Yiman! Your mother’s here!’ The little girl gives him one last hug before running to the waiting room. Shangqi takes a moment to recollect himself. ‘Here I am thinking that you finally managed to have some stamina while interacting with young children, maybe I was wrong.’ I teased as I sat beside him. 
‘Har har, hilarious.’ He tosses me a straw for our peach teas, as we were greeted by the amazing night view of San Francisco. ‘Enough about me, you good though?’ Looks like he didn’t forget the conversation that was cut off earlier. My mind goes back to a few minutes earlier, eavesdropping on the conversation.
‘I had to be a good friend when she was in trouble too.’
Life has been so unpredictable, I don’t even want to think too far into the future. With appearances from more superpowered beings, I don’t know what’s real anymore.
‘Yeah. To be honest, it’s been so crazy and overwhelming but I’ll get through it. I have you don’t I?’ Giving him a wink, I slowly sipped on the sweetness of the tea, savoring the pearls. He pauses for a moment, nodding thoughtfully. 
Life isn’t the same as it was before. But maybe, just maybe... if I had Shangqi, I’ll take each day on one at a time. Day by day. 
[END]
A/N: Hoho! I literally spent the whole afternoon writing because I just had to get this idea out and also because work was pretty slow today. I have no idea what is up with my first two fics hinting at unrequited love? I guess I got inspired by Shangqi’s and Katy’s platonic relationship because I thought it was so well written but I also love Shangqi so I guess is a compromise kinda thing. Again, do like and comment if you wish! Really thankful that y’all have been so kind to me so far! 
Perhaps I’ll try my hand at shorter ones like headcannons before this girl exhausts herself out and I don’t want to do that because I believe I have more to show! 
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prompt list
18+, I swear a lot.  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
A series of (unfortunate) lines of text that you'll read and probably question what the fuck is going on in my head. These are all from things I’ve written that have either never come to fruition, weren’t up to par with my usual standard, or just dumb shit floating around in my head. XD This is my 1000th post on here, woot!
Don't take it too seriously. Yes, they're vulgar. So am I.
You may change the pronouns to any gender identity you prefer. May be written for any fandom, any pairing, and tenses / objects can be modified to fit your need. A lot of them are dialogue, but some aren’t, and you are free to choose what you want it to be. Drabble, short story, a novel, anything goes.
Please tag me so I can read what you’ve written. :)
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“Uh, this is McDonalds, not a modeling agency.”
“Don’t you have rules?” / “Yeah, the rules are first come, first serve this ass.”
“Binding, but make it ropes and chains.”
“Are you implying we need to have an important conference meeting later and, by we, I mean my mouth and your dick?”
“You reek of desperation and a fragile ego.”
“So, you don’t want to accept my gift of a fuck?”
“It’s not fair – he gets you all to himself and I’m just watching, wondering what it feels like when you’re holding his dick.”
“Want to see this canvas?”
“People like you have your head so far up your ass that your mouth is talking shit."
“W-What? No. No, nothing is wrong. I’m fine. You’re fine. We’re all perfectly fine.”
“You could send someone to the hospital with your handsomeness.”
"Withholding information is a lie."
“Is this what everyone feels when they hear a word of kindness?”
“No pressure, just presence.”
“Stop trying to gyrate your dick into my personal space.”
"What’s more important, a full eight hours of sleep or a man? That’s right, I’m going to bed."
“What are you doing? That’s private.” / “That’s my face.”
“Admit you want me and I’ll make you want me more.”
“You’re being incredibly rude by not letting me sit on your dick right now.”
“You have two options – get on your knees, or I’ll make you get on your knees while kindly gracing you with the permission to cry.”
“Do you ever not think about sex?” / “Yeah, when I’m asleep. Oh wait, never mind, I’m dreaming about sex.”
“I’m sorry, you want me to sneak into his room and do what?”
“Please don’t speak to me with a dildo sticking out of you.”
“I’m not saying you’re delusional. I’m just saying you’re delusional.”
“Me, an asshole? Only on Tuesdays.”
“No, I don’t want you to fall in love. I want you to get laid. Because you’re annoying me.”
“I’m sorry I hate myself more than I love you.”
“Of course, I have feelings. They’re locked away and I don’t know where the key is.”
“I can, er, explain why it’s that size.”
“You aren’t the most productive member of society, but you aren’t a detriment either, so at least that’s something.”
“I won’t bite unless you want me to.”
“He watched and the hole inside his heart grew bigger, filled with a festering loneliness.”
“Be patient. I’m taking my rings off.”
“Couldn't hurt to fail.”
“But, for once in your life, you were finally greeted by some good-looking deliciousness.”
“I didn't ask for a public relations speech. I asked if you got turned on imagining it.”
“It’s not what it looks like, but it is kind of what it looks like, but I swear it’s mostly not.”
“A little sweet, a bit salty, low-key tastes like cum.”
“Let me get this straight, you opened the door, saw that, and, instead of re-closing the door and leaving like a sane person, you walked in and did what?”
“That’s why I have five kinds of pizza and porn on pay-per-view.”
“Let’s make a secret so I can watch you struggle to keep it.”
“Do you think that just because time has passed that I am immune to struggle? That because you didn’t see me suffer means that it must not exist?”
“That’s it, I’m calling the police, he can’t just show up here looking that illegal.”
“I hate you.” / “Welcome to the club. I’m the president, but I can promote you to vice president as soon as today.”
“I did not come all the way over here to make out with myself. I can do that at home.”
“Okay, I’m done with my shameless slut sonata, what were you saying?”
“There are no rules if no one knows.”
“You chugged down six cups of coffee like it was a blood transfusion.”
“I can’t remember what I said, that was two days ago.” / “We were talking about your balls!”
“Whose dick pic is this and why is it so inspirational?”
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shoutouts! thank you for writing! <3
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updated 20210530
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masterpost | nameless drabbles masterpost
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queenxxxsupreme · 3 years
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Hey Kacey! I was reading though you dad witcher stuff for the 1000th time because oh my GOD it makes me happy, and I was curious: how do you think the wolves would react told holding their newborn for the first time? I'm not asking for a fic (unless you wanna😜) cause I know thats a HUGE undertaking, but just wondering your kinda headcanons on it. Would they be afraid to hold it, be kinda shocked numb like 'omg I made a tiny human can't compute', be super excited and never want to put it down, etc. And again, even headcanons is just if you want to. You write all of them so damn well and their emotional reactions to things are always 100% in character when you write them.
Thank you for putting out your amazing works, allot of them have honestly helped me plug along through 2020 and beginning 2021. I hope you have a wonderful day!
A/N: I’m so sorry this took forever to finish babe! I have no idea how the post baby being born thing goes? I don’t know how long it is until the dad holds the baby? But I did research and I did change some things up because I didn’t want to do each story the same. So sorry for anything that isn’t correct or accurate. I kept Geralt’s sort of short because I have done one similar to this before except with Lana (Smitten) so this time I did Bram!
Warnings: it’s implied that the reader went through birth before this but it isn’t mentioned, fluffy with a hint of witcher angst, does breastfeeding count as a warning? if so, there is breastfeeding in this but only briefly
***
Lambert
“What’s she going?”
“She’s eating, Lambert.”
“Why is she making that noise?”
“She’s breathing while she’s eating.”
“Is she supposed to be breathing like that?”
“Yes, love.”
“Bug, why do her eyes look so wide? She looks scared.”
“Probably because you’re staring at her and hovering so close.” You giggled softly. He was towering over you two and leaning over you and Eva as she nursed. You didn’t mind, but everything was new to Eva, who was born just a little bit ago. 
Lambert moved away from Eva, choosing instead to sit near your knees so he wasn’t too close to make Eva uncomfortable or scare her, but so that he was close enough to watch her. 
“How long until she’s done?”
“Oh, love.” You tore your eyes away from Eva to look up at your husband. “You’re so impatient.”
“It’s been hours.” He frowned. “I read somewhere that if I don’t hold her soon, she won’t know I’m her dad.”
“I can assure you that isn’t true.” You shook your head with a little chuckle. “And it hasn’t been hours. It’s been maybe a half of an hour. Once she’s finished eating, she’ll stop nursing and then I promise you that I will let you hold her.”
He nodded his head, yellow eyes flickering down to Eva. 
“Is she gonna start teething and still be nursing like that?”
“It just depends on when her teeth start coming in.” 
Lambert winced and brought his hand up to his chest as if the thought brought him pain. 
He settled with quietly watching her, fascinated by every little noise that came from her and every little move she made. 
When Eva was finished nursing, Lambert rubbed his hands along the tops of his thighs and shifted in his spot. 
“Can I….?” He trailed off, eyes flickered up to you.
“Yes, my love.” You nodded, moving Eva around so you could safely hand her off to her father. “Come up here and sit next to me. My legs are hurting and I can’t move too well right now.”
Lambert moved to sit by you at the head of the bed. He became as still as a statue as you moved Eva into his arms. His brows drew together softly and his lips parted. 
“She’s…. Fuck, Y/N. She’s so tiny.” His voice cracked. 
“I know.” You put your hand on his shoulder, smiling at the sight of him holding her. You kissed his shoulder. “She’s so beautiful, isn’t she?”
“Looks just like you, bug.”
“I think she’s got your nose.”
“Gods, don’t say that.” He shook his head, sniffling. 
You reached over to wipe his cheeks. “She’s too perfect to look like me.”
“Well she’s ours. So she’s gotta have a little of both of us.”
Lambert nodded. His eyes were still focused on her. 
“Just wait until Vesemir gets a load of her…. I hope she gives him hell in her toddler years. 
Eskel
Your eyes followed Triss as she checked over the baby, ensuring that the tiny newborn was healthy and well. The baby was crying and that worried you, but Triss assured you that it was okay. 
“You did amazing.” Eskel murmured, leaning over to kiss your temple. He was sitting on the edge of the bed next to you. Your fingers were still intertwined on the bed by your side. Your skin was clammy and damp with sweat and you were exhausted, but you wanted to hold her, to hold your baby. 
“Did you get a good look at her?” You asked. Your voice was raspy. You turned your head to look up at him. 
“She looks beautiful.” He nodded, a smile tugging at the corner of his lips. 
“She has got a nice set of lungs on her.” Triss moved towards the bed with the baby in your hands. “Have you guys decided on a name yet?”
“Mhm.” Eskel watched you take the baby from Triss. “Nadia.”
“What a stunning name. Very fitting for the little girl.” 
You fixed the way you held Nadia, situating your hold on her so that she rested against your bare skin. Her cries died down and she curiously looked up at you. 
“I’ll leave you two be for a bit.” Triss took a few steps towards the door. “If you need anything, I’ll be out in the other room.”
Eskel thanked her since you were too caught up in gazing at the beautiful little baby on your chest. 
“Eskel.” You reached out with the hand that wasn’t providing her support. Blindly, you found his arm. “She’s…. She’s….”
“She’s beautiful.” He leaned down to kiss your messy hair. “And looks to be a bit hungry.” He chuckled softly as Nadia made a motion with her mouth like she was trying to suck on your skin. 
“After she eats, you can hold her.” You told him, moving her so that she could latch onto a nipple. 
“Oh I….” Eskel trailed off, shaking his head. 
You shifted at the foreign feeling of her latching on, but she seemed to get the hang of it. 
“You what?” You looked up at him. 
He shifted around to sit with his back more towards you. He looked down at his hands, rubbing them together. 
“I think I should wait a little while. Maybe until she’s older at least.” His words were quiet and hushed, but you could hear them just fine now that Nadia was no longer crying. 
“What? Eskel, what makes you think that?” You furrowed your brows.
“I just…. I don’t think it’s a good idea to have me hold her when she’s that tiny.”
You watched him for a few moments, unsure that you were even hearing him right. How could he say that? He had been so excited and so eager to hold her throughout your pregnancy and even through labor.
“Eskel, look at me.” You murmured. You wanted to reach out and hold his hand, to touch him and comfort him, but you were busy holding Nadia. 
He didn’t turn towards you at first, but then he let out a small breath and turned around so that he could look at you. 
“Eskel, you’re her father. There is no reason in the world you should put off holding her.”
His eyes flickered down to watch her, to watch his newborn. She seemed to already be drifting off to sleep. 
“What if I hurt her?” He asked, his voice low and timid. “On-On accident, of course. My hands- I-I’m just…. They’re big and the things I’ve done-,”
“You are more than just a witcher, Eskel.” You reminded him, though your words did little to comfort him. The furrow in his brow was still prominent. 
You made sure you had one arm securely holding Nadia in place, and slowly pulled your other arm away, making sure she was still comfortable and safe. 
You reached over to take Eskel’s hand, placing it on her back. You placed your hand over top of his, gently brushing your thumb over his knuckles.
“You would never hurt her, Eskel. You’ve been so excited since we found out I was pregnant. Please, don’t let those bad thoughts in your head ruin these precious moments you’ll never be able to get back.” You whispered, eyes staying on his face. 
He was focused intently on Nadia, golden eyes stuck to her face. 
A few silent minutes passed. He kept his hand on her back where you were holding it. He could feel her breathing, hear her little heart beating in her fragile ribcage. It was so different to hear her outside of your stomach, but it was just as comforting. 
“Okay.” He nodded. 
You smiled, taking your hand away from his so you could reach over and cup his cheek. 
Once Nadia was finished nursing, Eskel got comfortable on the bed and you carefully placed Nadia in his arms. 
“She’s so light.” He chuckled softly, making sure to keep his voice quiet so as to not scare her. “I can’t believe we…. That she’s…. She’s ours, doll.”
“She is.” You nodded, reaching over to brush your fingers through his dark hair. 
Geralt
“Fuck me, Geralt! Look at that little fella!” Jaskier exclaimed, shaking Geralt’s broad shoulder. 
“Jaskier!” Geralt hissed his name, not wanting to raise his voice. 
“It’s a damn shame he inherited that furrow you’ve got between your brows. Hope he doesn’t have your same bad attitude–,”
“Jaskier, please keep your voice down.” Geralt cut him off, almost speaking through clenched teeth to the bard. 
“He’s alright, Geralt.” You smiled. Briefly, you looked up to your husband but then your eyes fell back to the newborn you held in your arms. “He’s a quiet baby, isn’t he?” 
“Got that from Geralt too.” Jaskier commented, shifting his weight from one foot to the other. He was eager to get closer and see his little nephew. “I see he’s got Y/N’s nose though. Thank the gods.”
Geralt glared at Jaskier. 
“I know you’d like to hold him, Jaskier. You’re nearly jumping out of your skin, but–,” You were cut off my Jaskier’s excitement. 
“I would love to! That is true. However I do think Geralt should hold the little bugger first.” Jaskier put his hand on Geralt’s shoulder. 
“I agree.” You smiled at Jaskier. Your eyes flickered over to Geralt. “Come have a seat, love.” 
The witcher move to your bedside, sitting on the edge of the bed next to you. 
“He’s so small.” Geralt commented. “Is he healthy?”
“He is.” You nodded. “He’ll grow.”
You directed your husband on how to hold his arms and then you placed Bram in his arms. 
Geralt looked down at Bram, a little smile tugging at his lips. Bram was fast asleep with his mouth slightly open. 
“What’s his name?” Jaskier asked, sitting down next to Geralt. 
Geralt over to you, silently asking if you wanted to tell him. 
“Go ahead.” You encouraged, reaching out to place your hand on his arm. 
“Julian Bram, but we’re just calling him Bram.” 
Jaskier repeated the name under his breath, testing out the flow of it and how well it sounded together. 
“Julian? As in…. As in my name?”
You nodded while Geralt kept his eyes on Bram. 
“That’s so sweet of you, Geralt.” Jaskier put one arm around Geralt’s shoulders, pulling him in for a tight hug. 
Geralt groaned.
Taglists: @pressedinthepages @mishafaye @whitewolfandthefox @wolfyland07 @belalugosisdead @persephonehemingway @keira-hulmaster @dinonuggs69 @greatestauthorofmygeneration @shadow-hunters-lover @dancingwith-thesunflowers @tedi-fach-las @thecomfortofoldstorries @raspberrydreamclouds @natkowaa @disasteren @weathervanes-my-oneandlonely @onlyhenrys @wackylurker @criminaly-supernatural @magpie343 @permanently-exhausted-witcher @hina-chans-stuff @the-space-between-heartbeats @havenoffandoms @carriebee1 @ger-bearofrivia @naominami @writingawaymylife @reaganjenelle @theawkwardpedestrian @scarlettwitcher @badassspaceprincess @just-a-sad-donut @summersong69 @an--actual--human--disaster @rubyqueen819 @omgkatinka @c-a-v-a-l-r-y @vonxcon @mazakeen @bravelittlesunflower @thereagles @awkward-turtles-world @menalliha @cotton_mo @maan24 @monkeymo @krenee1drful @nympha-door-a @unadulteratedtreecrusade @Aquarius-pisces-rose @mentallyscreamingsincebirth @fl0ating @sometimesiwrite @you-fxcking-wish-bish @thanks-bruh-for-nothing @maan2442 @thegaydeath @creatingstuffinpeace @andyrazzledazzle @ameliasmistake @winterwolf @caraqas @bluscryn @thefirelordm @y-napotat @henrycavillbesty @crazybutconfidentaf @runawayolives @she-wolfoftheinquisition @onlygeraltofrivia @henrythickcavill @lharrietg @wellthisstinks
If your name is in italics, it wouldn’t let me tag you :(
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takaraphoenix · 3 years
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Fic Writer Review
Thanks to @light-miracles​ for tagging me! <3
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
As of this week, 1004 fics! :D”
2. What's your total AO3 word count?
8,052,836 words and counting ;)
3. How many fandoms have you written for?
Gosh that depends on how you define “fandom”. Like, does the Rise of the Brave, Tangled Dragons fandom count as one, because the crossover makes it one fandom, or would you count the movies individually? Same goes to DC.
The way I would count it, I’d say 27. Counting all the DC properties under the DC umbrella as one, same for the crossover fandoms.
4. Top 5 fics by kudos?
How Big, How Blue, How Beautiful (Marvel, Loki/Tony, 6245 kudos)
The Lion’s Pride (Voltron, Shiro/Keith/Lance, 5615 kudos)
Percy and the Ghost King of Summers High (PJatO, Nico/Percy, 4680 kudos)
Percy Jackson, Ambassador of Hades (PJatO, Nico/Percy, 3841 kudos)
My College Boyfriend (PJatO, Nico/Percy, 3613 kudos)
Deadass, this feels like a glitch. I have written seventy-nine multiple-chapter fics. By virtue of having multiple chapters, they tend to draw in a bigger crowd of people. And even if not, I could think of a dozen of more deserving oneshots off the top of my head, at least. I do not understand number 5 at all, it makes no sense, I have 1004 fics and by virtue of people clicking a button, this incredibly... mundane... not-even-3k-long fic is the fifth place for most-heart-button-clicks...? Like, it’s not a bad fic, it is just... impossibly boringly slice of life? Nothing happens in it? It’s not even one of the long oneshots where a lot of plot or feelings - or heck even insanely kinky smut I’d get - happens? I truly can not fathom what made this story so much more worthy of clicking the dumb heart-button than all of the hundreds of stories that have... so much more going on in it...? My brain genuinely can’t comprehend this.
5. Do you respond to comments? Why/why not?
Always. Because it feels like the polite thing to do. Sadly, receiving comments is not a given. Even when people like a fic - especially on AO3, with its cop-out “just click here to leave a heart” alternative, and yes I absolutely do think that that’s part of why many people don’t leave comments, because they are so conditioned through social media to think that a like-button is all it takes to communicate. So, in this comment-economy, I do think it’s worth to say thank you to those who do take the time and make the effort to leave actual feedback and truly let you know they enjoyed the story or what they enjoyed about the story.
6. A fic you've written with the angstiest ending.
That’d be a Beyblade oneshot from my German fandom days that was unrequited love ending in a suicide.
7. Do you write cross overs?
I used ot greatly dislike crossovers, because they only cater to a very specific group of people where those fandoms actually overlap for. But then I came across the whole Tangled/Brave/RotG/HttYD crossover fandom and it kind of took me by surprise. Opened my eyes to crossovers and since then, I’ve dipped into quite a couple different kinds of crossovers.
8. Ever received hate on a fic?
Were you really a fanfic author in the 2010 decade if you didn’t receive hate from the censorship and purity cult? Or, heck, in the beginning of that decade, from the homophobic “ew slash ships are evil and gross” crowd? :/
9. Do you write smut?
You could say that, yeah. *chuckles*
10. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
*ugly sobbing* I hate wattpad--
11. Ever had a fic translated?
I have been asked for permission more often than I can count, but I just... I just don’t like that? The thought of my fics on other people’s account, even when they do give credit to me as the original author.
And a bunch of the stolen fics on wattpad were, indeed, people who just decided to translate my fics and post them, all without my permission.
I did translate one fic myself though, because I wrote it when Germany passed the marriage equality law, so I wrote it in German and then figured I should also post it in English. ^^
12. Have you ever co written a fic?
Yes, I have! With the very lovely @kimmycup! ^-^
13. All time Fav ship.
ALL time. I think I have to go with Kaito/Shinichi from Detective Conan. It’s, by now, the ship that’s been with me the longest in an active way. I still get excited about them, I even wrote a fic for them just last month to celebrate my 1000th AO3 fic.
14. WIP you want to finish but don't think you ever will?
*looks shamefully at Animexx* Basically all my old Beyblade fics. I dropped out of that fandom too suddenly and it doesn’t help that they’re in German and I’ve stopped writing in German.
15. Writing strengths?
Writing speed and the ability to plan ahead; both, when I write a fic as well as planning my schedule ahead.
16. Writing weakness?
Endings? I really struggle with when to end a fic and how.
17. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in a fic?
It’s stupid and unnecessary. Use italics and note what language they’re speaking in. Like, look, if it’s a language you actually speak, I can understand the temptation, but 90% of those include an A/N about how the author used Google translate for that and just... why.
And I straight-up hate when authors then don’t include the translation directly behind the spoken part but rather at the very end of the chapter... I don’t... I don’t want to scroll down to look at what I am just trying to read in the middle of the chapter and then have to find the place I was before? It completely breaks the reading flow.
I think that petnames, even some phrases, do make things more authentic, when you’re writing bilingual characters. But when it’s entire dialogues, that’s too much and should just be indicated that it is being said in another language.
18. First Fandom you wrote for?
Yu-Gi-Oh!
19. What's your fav fic you've written so far?
It always depends. I have a lot of fics I am very proud of, or that I think are incredibly well-done. But for me my favorite fic would be defined by the one I enjoy rereading the most. Within the last year or so, I’d say it’s probably The Lost Soulmarks, but there are a bunch I’m bouncing back and forth between and it’s also always up to what fandom or pairing I’m craving. There’s no one holy grail fic that I hold over all others, I guess.
Tagging @kimmycup, @fallenqueen2, @miazeklos, @donnas-troia, @justonemorechapternicercy
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now i’ve got a writing block because every time i go to write something my brain goes “is THAT what you want your 1000th work posted to ao3 to be??” and i’m over here, like..... my dude if you don’t fuckin’ let me get anything written then yeah it’s going to end up being a crack humor drabble or a something i’ve had sitting around 90% finished for years
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hotchley · 3 years
Text
I am making my 1000th post the start of the Criminal Minds Ships as a Taylor Swift Playlist even though I am by no means qualified to do this so please don’t attack me series!
And to start with, I’m doing Aaron Hotchner and Haley Brooks because I love them so much and she deserved better. I tried to create some sort of story but I have no idea if it will work.... so here goes nothing:
Aaron and Haley:
Enchanted~ Speak Now You Belong With Me~ Fearless Today Was A Fairytale Our Song~ Taylor Swift Mine~ Speak Now tolerate it~ evermore All You Had To Do Was Stay~ 1989 The Last Time~ Red the last great american dynasty~ folklore exile~ folklore White Horse~ Fearless happiness~ evermore
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kaizoku-pirateking · 2 years
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One Piece 1000 Logs Thoughts/Moments of Cherishing - 1000+ word count for a masterpiece
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I usually don't post stuff like these BUT One Piece took my heart and made me emotional in many ways after reaching the 1000th episode
The very first time I notice One Piece are from many posts about it, I don't pay attention to any of the posts back then. But, not until a friend of mine he said that I should watch One Piece as it was worth it
Episode 1; slightly had made me piqued my interest back then, I never had watch any characters as a pirate or have devil fruits so I was confused by Luffy's body, I even thought that devil fruits are very rare and only Luffy has eaten it XD
Being experienced to Naruto (which I had watched before One Piece), because of the old quality of drawing back then, I was used to the old animations considering it's made <2010's
My first love or the character whom I fell inlove first was Shanks! I just love his funny and comforting personality so much, Actually I had or coincidentally watched Episode 1 of One Piece was when it's Shanks birthday so I was definitely in shocked
As time and episodes goes by, I had always been excited and learning many information's and adventure Luffy are getting, I thought that maybe even if Luffy had only 10 crew members he and his teammates will go stronger. And I was correct
Seeing each of them backstory had made me cried so much on how much pain they experiencing through the past, Especially Sanji's as because on how his father and sibling treated him as such
In Marineford, I always believe in Luffy that he can save Ace, but it shocked me when he was killed. “Not everything will always be accomplished” by anonymous. I was left stunned, wide agaped when hearing Ace's last wishes and words. He can't even see his little brother becoming the King of Pirates
The best arc for me in the whole One Piece for me might be Dressrosa, first off is because of Corazon; even if he and Law aren't biologically or blood related he still treats Law as his son and it warms me up so much—He even protected the poor boy until he died by the hands of his brother, Doflamingo
On this episode, we had discovered so many things about them. They, The Strawhat Pirates and the Whole One Piece character's will always be in my heart. I knew Luffy can beat Kaido and once he do he will be more closer in becoming what he achieved of
But of course, Everything will always come to an end. But hopefully not yet and we can experience once more different feelings with them
I am grateful to Eiichiro Oda for making a masterpiece, Some people are still hesitating if they should watch the anime as because it's long. And I must tell you, you won't regret it at all after you finished the 1000 episodes you would feel like it's not enough. And that's how we feel too as a long time One Piece fan, I'm grateful to had met this amazing one piece community that lies in Tumblr. I'm happy I had met you all and One Piece.
One Piece will always be here with me even when the time comes. Someday, If ever One Piece are finally gone IT won't be gone or vanish forever. It's always will be marked in out minds
I had fallen inlove for many of these characters and their dedication towards something they want to achieve in the future
The rivalry between Kid, Law, and Luffy is something I fancy or like. They despite being enemies they still trust each other and knew after their alliance they would be back becoming an enemy.
[SPOILERS!! I'm worried about Sanji's wellbeing and hoped he will be fine by the end of Onigashima, Despite wanting to be killed and asked that to Zoro for a favor I don't think Zoro will do it—Even if he hates Sanji he's still a nakama and something Luffy doesn't want to happen.]
I laughed many times with them and their good and gold moments.
As I watch the One Piece Episode 1000 I'm happy to able to reach the impossible along with you all and the crew. Everything Luffy did and his crew are just in whole 2 years. I'm excited to know what will he and his crew will do more for the following episode.
When the “We Are” Re animated version play I smiled and sense of great adreline rushed on me. It had been long since I last feel something excitement like this. The opening change a lot
But even if it change there's one thing I noticed about it being played, It's not just about reminding the episodes back then, but to tell us that we will restart. That we are all back to Episode 1 after Luffy had beaten Kaido and more ferocious enemies will come after them especially the new marines
I hope this will last forever but it won't, I'm ready to accept the fact that every episode/chapter we take the closer we are to the end. Thank you once more Luffy snd your crew for bringing me so much memories to always remember. I'm indebt to you forever
And for the last time I love their goals. Luffy wanting to become a Pirate King, Zoro as the greatest swordsman but In order to become one he must defeat Mihawk, Sanji who dream to find the All Blue
Nami who wants to travel across the whole world and draw the whole One Piece Map, Usopp being the greatest man in the sea, Chopper who wants to be a great doctor, Franky who wants to build the best ship, Brook who wants to meet Laboon once more, Robin who wants to be free like everyone else—and Jimbei the newest recruit he wants humans to become and live the same ranking as the fishmans
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onelastsho-t · 3 years
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Signing Off, 05/02/2021
“Letting go is the easy part. It’s the moving on that’s painful. If I were to go back in time, there are a lot of things I will choose to change. But in the end, I will always choose you, over everything else.” 
It has been almost half a year since we completely stopped talking to each other. No form of communication, at all. It happened so fast yet so gradually. We went from talking non-stop everyday to zero communication. 
During this period of time, there isn’t a day where I stopped thinking about you. There are countless days where I almost wanted to drop you a text but it never happened. I still have our picture in my wallet and whenever I feel defeated by life, I look at it to give me some strength to carry on. You are still so alive in my head and in my heart. You are still, sometimes, the first thought I have when I wake up in the morning.
I think of you when I am commuting and passed by some places where we used to hang out. When I listen to songs such as “Yellow Lights”, “Us” and a lot more, especially “You Complete Me”. I still remember how you sang this song to me and it still warms my heart so much. When I go to a nice restaurant and the food taste great because you are such a glutton. When I watch a nice series on Netflix which I know you will definitely like. When I see cute dogs on the streets knowing you will shriek and wanting to pet them. Sometimes I just stare into space without any thoughts and you will just appear out of nowhere. All these thoughts always make me smile. The thought of you always makes me smile.
I wonder a lot if you think about me too. 
I still wish we didn’t have to go separate ways. But I understand that’s what was best for us at that point in time. You had too much on your plate and I had so much frustration with the situation I didn’t know how to handle it myself. I understand you did what was best for us and I think that’s the way you chose to love me. You saw what I couldn’t see. And for that - please know that I will always be grateful to you. For being so brave and for choosing this path to allow us both to heal properly. 
I will never be as brave as you. And maybe that’s why you will always be one of the strongest person I will know. Maybe the fact of you being so stubborn is good in this regard. You never give up no matter how tough the road ahead is. You never even flinch. You just continue marching on and choosing to fight the battle, even when you had to do it alone. I am so fucking proud of you and I will never stop saying that. 
I wish I wasn’t so afraid to wish you a proper “happy birthday” last year. I think love always makes me do stupid things. I recorded and uploaded a 25-minutes long video just to wish you a happy birthday weeks before 2 November 2020. But in the end, the video was never made known to you or to anyone. I even went to the Apple store wanting to pick up an Apple Watch for you because I know you have always wanted it. I replayed a lot of scenes in my head - how will you react? Will it stress you out? Is this doing more harm than good? It’s such a stupid idea. It was a tough battle and then at some point I realised I had no place in doing all of these. So, in the end, nothing was said and all these will forever remain as scenes played in my head. 
I think after all these time, you still care for me in your own way. Maybe watching my Instagram stories is one of the ways to let me know you still care, or maybe not. Maybe it’s all in my head. I don’t know and I think maybe I won’t ever know. 
To me, it doesn’t really matter that much anymore if you will ever get to read all these posts. Because I know, you are slowly achieving your goals. All I ever really wanted was for you to be happy and to have your inner peace. And I know you will have all that - slowly but surely. Remember? You appear to be happier and truth to be told, I am so so so happy for you. My heart still gets this tingling feeling whenever I see you smile and that’s when I know I will take a very very long time to get over you completely. Why do you still melt my heart?
Never thought you will have such an impact on someone right? You do. You are such an amazing person and I hope you will never stop telling yourself that. You brought me so much peace and happiness among the chaos. You taught me how to love myself better. And the list goes on. So please do know that you are not a bad person for hurting me because I know I hurt you too. It didn’t matter who hurt who and how much who fell short, a relationship is a choice to commit and I love you, that’s why everything else didn’t matter. There’s always bound to be hurt in a relationship and I quote the song “The Black and White” - call it what you need, but don’t blame yourself for me. 
You are so special and don’t you dare for one second think you are not. You are so precious. You always make me want to take care of you no matter how strong you appear to be because I know deep down, you are not. I ended up hurting you even though you are truly the last person I would ever want to hurt. I've always always wanted to protect you from this world, from anyone who wants to or who will hurt you. You will always be that special person in my heart holding that special place. And you will always be worthy, no matter how bad a person you think you are. Just so you know, you were never the bad person in my story and you never will be. Maybe I will forever have this regret of letting you get away but as long as I know you are doing well, everything’s going to be fine. 
I will probably always carry this hope of you coming back, no matter how much time has passed.
But for now, maybe this is the last thing I can give to you and also to myself. I forgive the long distance. I forgive the lack of communication. I forgive the pandemic for taking away the last chance I had to spend quality time with you. I forgive myself, I forgive us. Most importantly, I forgive you. 
I will always choose to forgive you because this lifetime is too short. Even though we were together for 2.5 years, I still feel like I wasn’t given enough time with you. I could have spent forever looking at you and not get bored because you will always find ways to either make me roll my eyes hard or laugh real hard. I could have spent forever getting lost in your eyes and the warmth of your hugs. I could have spent forever getting to know you - each and every version of you throughout this lifetime. 
But I know for now, greater things are waiting for you to achieve. I hope you will continue to be you. Never let anyone and any thoughts of not being good enough bring you down. Continue growing, continue scaling greater heights and continue fighting life. The future will always be daunting, perhaps it will overwhelm you and leave you doubting yourself. But please don’t ever give up, okay? Take a break when you are tired and continue to soldier on. I will continue to work hard and aim to achieve more too. And I can’t wait to hear good news about you in the future. I know I will be so happy for you for finally getting into the place in life where you always wanted and deserved. You deserve happiness more than anyone else.
We might never talk to each other again. Today could have been our 1000th day together. You are not mine anymore but I'm still a little bit yours. And I know after all these months, it’s probably time for me to move on from us. It’s time for me to move on from you. It was a privilege to love you, and it was a privilege to let you go. You are a tough act to follow but I gotta follow through.
I will try my best not to scream in my head “cute” or “beautiful” the next time I see your picture on social media. I will try not to pause for a short while the next time I come across your profile because trust me, I still do. If you happen to read this someday down the road, please just know that I still care so much for you but I think this is the best I can do for you. I will always care for you in my own way. I will always keep you so close to my heart.
I still love you and I am aware that I am still very in love with you. But I know if you felt the same way, you would have spoken to me because the ball has always been in your court ever since we stopped talking. 
Maybe someday we will meet again as better versions of ourselves and the time will finally be right for us.
But for now, as of this moment, here’s me signing off from this platform and taking baby steps to move on from you. It will take a lot of self-awareness, a lot of effort and a whole lot of time. Maybe I will spend this lifetime moving on from you. Or maybe I won’t ever move on from you but I know I gotta try. 
I don’t know what is waiting ahead of this road but I know, you will always be living somewhere inside of my heart and this I promise - nobody can ever take away. 
If along the way you meet someone who treats you well, from the bottom of my heart - I truly wish you well and I hope the person will know how to cherish and love you because you deserve all the good in this world. 
Please don’t tolerate bullshit again, okay? Don’t be stupid hor please (so singlish on Tumblr I know but it’s ok no more aesthetic after all these wordy posts). Grow up already so must know how to protect yourself please. Don’t be so stubborn also. I know your love hate relationship with cats but please do not get your allergy triggered by petting them especially at your void deck. Stock up more cooling water at home in case of emergency headache or fever. Also try not to scratch the spot on your head whenever you are in deep thoughts if not later really become baldy (HAHA)!! And lastly, avoid your black hole at all costs. I repeat - avoid at all costs. If you ever fall into it, just know that those thoughts are not real and get out of that place asap, okay? 
Go be weird, go be you, go conquer your demons and the world. I'm so thankful I met you in this lifetime you have no idea.
Important things must say thrice: 
I will always miss you and I will always love you. All ways. I will always miss you and I will always love you. All ways. I will always miss you and I will always love you. All ways.  
Till we meet again, take care.
Signing off,  Jes 
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Quarantine Activities ~Loki Imagine~
Summary: Since the coronavirus quarantine, you have been stuck at the Avengers headquarters with the team. Luckily for you, you can introduce Loki to many Earth things.
Author’s Note: This is my 1000th post. Never thought it’d be about the quarantine but I got no other ideas to be honest. Please remember to NOT go outside unless it’s necessary. And remember to wash your hands everybody!
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The quarantine was horrible for you. As much as you liked spending time to yourself, you wanted to go out and have fun. You lied on the couch bored out of your mind as you stared up at the ceiling.
“Is she dead?” You heard Loki ask someone.
“No. Y/N’s just bored,” Steve told him.
“There’s nothing to do!” You whined. 
“Is this quarantine that bad?” Loki asked. You sat up from the couch to look at him.
“It’s caused by so many things. Luckily we don’t have it. And another bonus, you, Thor, and Vision don’t have it cause you three are immune to it,” You said.
Bruce and Tony were helping find a vaccine as well as helping civilians around the country with supplies. Since the vaccine was still in development, it was going to take a while for them to get everyone out of quarantine. 
“Surely there’s something you can do to pass the time,” Loki said.
“Well I still have that Disney puzzle, I could binge watch the shows I need to finish, and I could finish reading the books I have,” You thought out loud.
“Why not do those instead of lying on the couch?” Sam asked you.
“I’m not interested in doing those. I want to go out,” You pouted.
“What if I help you do those things?” Loki asked.
Everyone but you knew that Loki was in love with you. You were the only one who didn’t hate him as much as the rest. Loki saw how genuine your kindness was to him, thus causing him to like you.
“Alright. Do you want to read or do puzzle? Maybe watch a show?” You asked.
“I think the puzzle would be fun,” Loki said.
“Okay! I’ll go get my Disney puzzle,” You said before going to your room to get it. 
As Loki waited, Thor walked over to the room. He saw Loki waiting patiently making him suspicious. 
“What are you planning brother?” Thor asked.
“I am waiting for Y/N. She and I are going to make a puzzle, read some books, and watch some shows she is fond of,” Loki answered. 
“So you’re going to spend the day with Y/N?” Thor asked Loki. 
“Yes I am. She is someone who I do not despise here.”
“I’m back!” You sung as you brought the puzzle box.
“Shall we get started?” Loki asked you.
“Yup! Anyone else wanna join?” You asked.
“We’re good,” Sam tells you. You gave them a nod before opening up the box and dumping the pieces on the table.
It took two hours for the two of you to finish. You were proud and happy to have framed it. Now it was to read your books. Loki didn’t mind the fictional stories you had brought. You both sat on the couch with your legs on his lap. Loki slightly blushed at the position you both were in. 
Loki had to admit to himself that you were adorable at some gasps and facial expressions you had made as you read the book. It was adorable to him. Once you both were done reading, it was time to binge watch your favorite shows.
“Now what is this show about?” Loki asked you.
“It’s called, Supernatural. It’s about two brothers who hunt monsters and goes around the country,” You explain to him.
“Interesting enough. Shall we watch it now?” Loki asked.
“Sure. Let me just grab some snacks,” You tell him.
You quickly grabbed some drinks and food before going back to your room. You and Loki sat on your bed as you both watched the show. Through the fourth season, you fell asleep on Loki’s shoulder.
Loki blushed before helping you lie down on the bed. Loki cleaned up the mess for you so you wouldn’t worry about it when you woke up.
“Stay,” You mumbled.
“I’m sorry?” Loki said, unsure of what you had said to him.
“Stay,” You repeated.
Loki got into the bed with you before you cuddled up closer to him. Loki’s heart started to race as he held onto you. 
“Sweet dreams, Y/N,” Loki said before kissing your head. 
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sweeterthanthis · 3 years
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Guys, I just can’t 😭
I’m having a very emotional, crazy evening. I’m not entirely sure why. It may well be mental health related, with a sprinkle of sleep deprivation added on top.
I’m gonna take some time to work on my Bucky multichapter fic. I listened to this album again for the 1000th time, and I was inspired to write some sad shit. So here goes...
I’ll post today’s and tomorrow’s kinktober tomorrow evening.
I hate feeling like I’m letting people down, but I think that’s way more to do with me and my self esteem than anything else.
Lots of love xoxo
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