#I FORGOT THE WINGS ON THE LAST ONE NOOOOOO

[linxkly]

Another grian liveblog! i really enjoyed the last on i did so here’s another :)

(this ended being really long I’m so sorry)

grians merch! go check it out! I bought one and I’m very excited for it to come

HE DID IT my boy pressed the record button I’m so proud of him

I love the little yell of happiness he did away from the mic after he said that

Hermitopia!!

thank god he’s addressing the whole “grrr im being forced to watch another series thing”

THE HERMITS ON HOLIDAY BUT THE CAR BROKE DOWN OR SOMETHING IS SO PERFECT OH MY GOD

THE STORY THE LORE

the hermits have been busy busy busy

poor grians the leader of all this

return of the grian empire, but he learned how to share and collaborate with others

he’s visiting Katherine!!

aww he didn’t actually interact with her :(

OLI AND HIS LUTE ELYTRA I CANT

oh no the rocket shortage begins

that’s,, a lot of scaffolding

like,,, a lot a lot of scaffolding

but it looks cool from a distance!!

built height empire,,, but they’re all tiny

I like it, picasso

bouncing villagers!

aww noooooo pls don’t crash the empires economy I like their barter and trade system

they’re getting gunpowder from jimmys place

apparently this whole storyline was fabricated just so grian could get on this server and annoy timmy

oh poor impulse has been left behind bc he don’t got no wings

ah. he has taken a stack of jimmys gunpowder. he know owes???? timmy

they’re going to joeys instead now

but before they leave tumble town they’re placing an intelligence test,,, in the form of a button on top of tnt,,, with a sign saying press me,,, in an empire where jimmy and scar are hanging out,,,

oh no

grian feels bad for impulse, and now they’re walking together

grian has found joeys gator villager

he is confused

he has found the pesky bird villager!

THE LAG JOKE

OH NO THE LAG,, JOEYS GUNPOWDER LAGGED INTOHIS INVENTORY

grians elytra broke, oh how the turn tables

impulse left grian

impulse grian and cub are now chatting about the AWFUL LAG ON THE SERVER OH NOOOO

THE RETURN OF TAG??

oh no they’re playing tag on the empires server

LORE VILLAGERS

grian that’s respiration. not unbreaking

LORESICALS??

oh no grian you let the villagers out

AVADAKALORE I CANT

WINGARDIUM LEVILORESA

STUPIFILORE

EXPECTO PALOREM

EXPELLILOREMAS

ALOHOLOREMA

he spent so much time yelling lore spells he forgot which enchant he was trying to get

unbreaking loresome???

these puns are giving me AHA flashbacks

HE GOT UNBREAKING III

kdbdjfjf you can hear impulse underground cheering

I love seeing all the hermits work on the same thing all at once this is incredible

ooh visit to pix

he’s using pix’s machine to age his copper

he gets to press a button!!

poor guy is worried about breaking David

there’s a sheep trying to eat his waffle

oop he’s borrowing fwhips sign style

building timelapse of a hermit induction machine and tag look at him go!

hermitssss stop bringing your lag to other servers!!

GRIAN WHAT WERE THOSE SOUNDS

scar snuck up on him

they’re messing with the lasso jimmy gave scar

I like the idea of the worlds largest bubble

clearly there was a mishap in communication rip scar

ooooh scar becoming the first hermit!

hermitgeddon??

awww he’s little!!!

just a tad smol

“IM A LITTLE BOY WHY AM I A LITTLE BOY”

oh poor fwhip saw things he shouldn’t have

awww little grian!!

they’re bdubs!!

imagine being smaller than a goblin lol

THEYRE SHORT KINGS

all the hermits have been busy busy bees

ok ik it’s shocking they’ve done all of this so fast but I have to keep reminding myself that this is at least 10-13 people working on hermitopia at around the same times ofc it’s going to be pretty quick

but it’s just still so immpressive

it’s cubs turn to be hermitified

THE JANGLER HAT??

hermits vs empires tag oooh

go watch grians vid for the full tag explanation, bc if I’m completely honest, I don’t really get it

grian is a hermit irl??

episode ends with grian laughing about his irl height rip

and that’s a wrap! these are so much fun to make :)

Idk how often I’ll do these but I might do them for sausage bc he uploads at normal times for me it’s nearly 3am I might pass out after uploading this lmao

#grian #hermitcraft #empires smp #empires smp season two #empires x hermitcraft #liveblogging #links liveblogging #i kinda love making these #might start doing them for sausage #hermitblr

[heckin-cheesebread]

Just bought a hotburple and named her cheesecake, i'm so happy!!!

She's so cute im dying, i love them equally tho

#httyd #how to train your dragon #gronckle #school of dragons #hotburple #httyd art #I FORGOT THE WINGS ON THE LAST ONE NOOOOOO

[madllamamomma]

The Visitor~ Part 5 (SMUT TIME!)

[Warning: The following is NSFW, 18+ including, smut, blood/gore, possibly triggering situation. Please read with viewer discretion.]

Part 5~

“... Home Is With You”~

Just before the clock chimes at quarter til, frazzled and sweating, Rhemi unlocks the door to the shop and lifts the protection spell, barreling in like a cyclone.

Expecting her to do as such, Asra comes out of the next room where he was reading a book and greets his friend. Lazily, he leans into the doorframe shaking his head with a delightful chuckle. “Keeping it kinda close are we?” He teases, pointing his chin to the coo-coo clock.

“Yeah yeah yeah—” She replied with a grin, rolling her eyes, pulling up her sleeves, and throwing her hair up into a loose bun on the top of her head.

Hastily, she gets to work on the finishing touches of the potion for Mrs. Edilen, the very sweet elderly woman who helped run the newly built orphanage.

With just a mere minute to spare, the front door opens. Right on time as always. In comes Mrs. Edilen is dressed in a pastel blue and brown , but unexpectedly she isn’t alone. She comes in with her hands looped around a familiar muscular large arm. Seeing who it belonged to make the apprentice’s heart flutter--Of course it was Muriel’s. “... Thank you, my dear boy. You’re always so kind. I don’t know what I did without you and Rhemi around.”

“.... You’re welcome, Mrs. Edilen.” He mumbles with a bright red blush staining his cheeks, unable to tolerate her compliment. He’s gotten so much better at accepting compliments, but he’s still always so bashful when he does. It’s just too cute.

“Well hello there, Mrs. Edilen! I see you pick up another handsome man on your walk here~” Asra greets laying over the counter lazily.

“Oh why, yes! I have!” She plays along with a cute grin. “...‘Fraid he’s not even half my age—But if I was thirty years younger!” With a wink, she playfully nudges Muriel gently in his side.

“M-M-Mrs. Edilen!” Muriel adorably grumbles, embarrassed yet strangely flattered.

“Good afternoon, Mrs. Edilen!” Rhemi sings, pouring the potion into the glass vial so she can seal it with a cork.

The old woman pats the top of Muriel's forearm, continuing to shower him with compliments. “You’re quite a catch, dearie! And so is she—” As Rhemi comes closer, she unloops her arm and hugs the apprentice gently. “Hello dear, you are looking radiant and beautiful as always.”

“Awww. So are you! You’re going to make Muriel and I have fat heads with all this flattery, Mrs. Edilen.”

“Zachary, Lilian and little Nathan said they saw you today at the fountain with a man in a fancy cape. They said that it was your father from another country! Is that true??”

An unwanted wave of dread washes over the apprentice with the mention of her father, but she quickly stifles her bad feelings and smiles even more, half faking it. “Y-... Yes! We met yesterday by rather strange circumstances—but we’re now getting to know each other. I showed him around Vesuvia today.”

Touched, the old woman presses her right palm to her chest. “Ohhhh! Well isn’t that just lovely! I am so happy that you have been reunited with your father. It breaks my heart that most of the children at the orphanage will never know their real parents...  But I just hope one day they will have a family of their own.”

“Thank you.” Rhemi mutters before handing her the vial. “—Here ya go! Freshly made ‘Rhemi’s radical rheumatism remedy potion’!”

“Ohhhh. Thank you dear.” She gratefully says handing the few coins.

Rhemi never liked to charge the woman more than what it costs for ingredients. It’s not like the orphanage made very much, yet the woman did everything she could for those kids. It seemed like the least Rhemi could do for her.

Glancing up to the cuckoo-clock Mrs. Edilan makes an adorable little startled sound. “OH! Look at the time! Look at the time! The children will be expecting me for supper soon. Well, I won’t keep you all waiting. Good night, my dearies.”

“W- wait!.... I’ll walk you home…. Getting dark out.” Muriel offers glaring to the outside the near widow with heavy suspicion.

The woman shakes her head slightly giving him a pointed look. “And take you away from this lovely little thing?” She says gesturing to his fiancée. “Oh no!-- No. No. Noooooo! I’ll be just fine, thank you! I’m old but I’m tougher than I look!” She says with a wink flexing her right bicep, bat-winged and slightly shaky from old age.

Muriel can’t help but drop his head a bit and smile at her humorous self, but he seems persistent. “I… I know you are, Mrs. Edilan. But three men were murdered a few blocks away and were much younger and stronger than you, and the culprit has yet to be caught… Could be dangerous walking alone...”

Rhemi, Asra, and Mrs. Edilan all stand there for a little while taking in what Muriel just announced. It is all rather shocking news to them, there hasn’t been a lot of violence since the siege against Lucio and his army last year, let alone murders.

Worry in the poor woman’s brown eyes she half covers her mouth with her hand still quite shocked. “Ohhh… Oh my! Well… I haven't heard about that…”

“People at the market told me about it…” He adds.

Asra takes his hat, vest and bag with faust wrapped warmly under his clothes. “Here Mrs. Edilan, I’m headed that way to meet someone. Why don’t you join me? We’ll protect each other.” He laughs at the last part with his cute mischievous fox-like grin.

A warm smile sprouts on the old woman’s face showing all her wrinkles in her cheeks, but makes her look just as sweet and kind. “Oh you all are such kind souls… Well... I suppose since you’re headed that way, I’d love to.” She then turns and apologetically pats Muriel’s arm. “Sorry, Muri. Looks like I’ve got another hot date.”

Shoulders shaking from holding in his laughter, Muriel attempts to hide his smile and nods his head. “I see that.”

“No hard feelin’s right?”

He laughs through his nose softly. “Not at all.”

“Hey, Asra. Ya headed to the Rowdy Raven tonight?” Rhemi quickly interjects.

“You know it~” Asra says with a ginger toothy smile, obviously happy to have some fun plans tonight as he walks to the front door.

Just before the two leave out the door, Rhemi quickly calls out, “A-Asra??”

They both stop in their tracks and look at her, perplexed at the tone of almost urgency in her voice.

Unable to make eye contact with her friend, her father’s rude words suddenly swimming around her head, she glances to the ground remorsefully. “W-.... When you see Ilya….. please tell him I’m so sorry.”

All three of them look at her oddly, Asra flutters his white eyelashes and tilts his head. “W-Why? Did you two get into another disagreement?”

She sheepishly rubs her arm glancing at the mess on the glass countertop not very sure if she should talk about that. “No… not-.... not exactly… but he’ll know exactly what I’m talking about.” She walks over with a small bag of gold coins from her pocket and places it into Asra’s hand. “Tell ‘em. His drinks are on me tonight.”

Staring at the coin bag in his hand, Asra wants to ask so badly what happened today, but knowing Ilya, I’ll soon find out. Now is not the time anyways with Mrs. Edlian here. “O-oh…. well.. alright then. Goodnight you two.” He finally waves while heading out the door placing his hat on his head.

“Night, see you tomorrow.” Rhemi says with a soft grin.

As soon as they both leave, Rhemi locks it from the inside and places the locking spell on the door. And places her back to the door with a heavy sigh.

“.... Something wrong?” Muriel asks with a concerned look standing a few feet away. “Something happened today?... —Something bad?” His eyes widen while slight panic rings in his voice as his thoughts race. He still didn’t trust Martin, something in his gut told him that something bad was going to happen today, and every possible negative scenario runs through his head.

With his heartfelt moan, Rhemi shuffles over to the messy countertop so she can start to clean it. However the sight of it just makes her tired, so she decides to just push it all over to one side and deal with it later.

“.... I…. Well… let’s just say… it didn’t go the way I thought it would have.” She mumbles melting her upper body on the glass countertop, the long day finally taking its toll on her. Emotionally and physically, she’s exhausted, and the day isn’t even over yet.

So much has happened today. Learning about Phara… About her and her mother being abducted from their own home… About how her father wanted her and Muriel to move to Charlès—About how her father was apparently a homophobic—Oh geez. I almost forgot about that part. She whines to herself.

The last thing she wanted to tell Muriel was about that part—especially knowing his own sexuality… Now that she thought about it, all her friends and even her fiancé are queer. She was the different one out of the bunch. And she wasn’t even sure about that completely, its not like she had much experience, nor did she remember her sex life before she died. Not to mention that her fiancè was close to tossing him out yesterday. No—telling Muriel will only make him dislike the man even more, and that isn’t what she wanted.

Muriel slunks his tall body over to the counter and pushes his fiancée’s long bangs out of her face and she looks up at him with one eye. Tenderly, he leans down and places a few featherlight kisses on her temple and she feels her heart flutter for a peaceful moment. Carefully he then leans over the counter with her on the opposite side. “What happened?” He asks just over a whisper.

With a long inhale, Rhemi picks up her head to look at her lover. Muriel reaches over and holds her hand in his and they interlace their digits together like they always did.

“.... A.. A lot happened today,” she continued. “…. Some good… Some… not…. so good… My father doesn’t like Vesuvia for some reason… But the most important thing—”

“....Yes?”

“.... I….. I learned about Phara today…. The person he was asking about yesterday…. and why we haven’t seen each other in such a long time….”

“...Oh?”

“Apparently… Mum and I were…… were kidnapped.” She somehow gets out, her gaze fixed on the floorboards.

“O-...Oh?.... Hmmm…. That’s…. ah…. ” He awkwardly trails off, unsure what to say. Knowing how he felt when Khamgalai told him about his parents, it’s a lot for a person to process. He could only imagine what it was like being alone when she learned this. He scratches his head and bends his neck towards the other side of the shop. “....Wanna go sit on the couch?...Talk about it there?”

Rhemi silently nods and he takes her hand leading her to the velvet couch. He sits down and she sits next to him then lays her head on his chest. Gently he places his chin on the top of her head and they snuggle up tightly, enjoying their company for a moment.

“I miss you today.” He says softly, giving her a loving squeeze with his arm.

“I missed you too.” She sighs feeling somewhat relieved being in Muriel’s embrace. It always felt better with him there.

Finally, after a few moments of recharging herself, she starts the story about her day.

She goes on how Phara, her ex-magic tutor abducted her and her mother many years ago. How she was an evil witch who practiced dark magics and even taught evil things to poor young and vulnerable Rhemi who didn’t know any better at the time. How the witch nearly killed her father was burned so badly that left a terrible scar all up his right arm.

“Do… Do you know where she went?” Muriel asks rather shocked about all of this. “Is she still a threat to us?”

“... No…I don’t.” She mumbles almost frustratedly. “... I don’t remember this woman at all!... Her name doesn’t feel familiar to me either, let alone if she’d come back one day.”

Stumped at finding words, Muriel looks at his lover’s saddened expression, knowing what she was thinking. With his left hand he holds her chin, turning it towards him to meet her eyes. “Hey ...... Just because she was bad, doesn’t mean you are, Rhemi. You’re the best person I know.” His words were kind and genuine, but they gave little comfort to her.

With an unconconviced huff, she pulls away, averting her eyes. “I… I don’t know about that…” All she could think about was this morning and her work with the blood magic. She never mentioned it to Asra either because she had a feeling like he wouldn’t approve of her experimenting with ‘self mutilating’ spells. Now this all feels so dirty. Is that why she feels like she has to lie all the time? Especially when it came to her feelings?

“What do you mean?” He asks, sounding so sad while furrowing his brow.

“I-.... Just…” She stutters then her words turn into unintelligible mumbles. Fumbling for an explanation, her shoulders dropped already over this topic. This just isn’t the time to process this. She thinks to herself. “Nothing, Love… just forget I said anything.”

Tempted to prying further, he opens his mouth, but seeing this tired expression, she clearly doesn’t want to talk about that anymore. The last thing he wanted was for her to feel probed, make her shut down. For now he closes his mouth, slightly nodding his head to himself.

A silence takes over as they both sit there on the couch hearing the seconds on the clock tick by. Finally, Muriel moves on. “....So…. ah…. What happened at tea?”

A large scoff escapes her lips as she dramatically drops her head thinking about this dreadful afternoon.

“Ugghhhh!—Good god... This afternoooooooonnn!…” She whines, now pulling on her face, making it long and funny looking before letting go. “.... My father was a bit…. abrasive... Especially to Julian… He kinda said something offensive to him.”

“Someone offended Ilya? Our Ilya??.... Well….. that’s new. Usually it’s the other way around. At least with you anyways.” Muriel chuckles a little trying to lighten the mood, making Rhemi crack a small grin. “... So… What’d he say to him?”

A bead of sweat formed on her brow as he asks that. She doesn’t want to lie, but she doesn’t want to tell him the truth either. “I… I dunno if I should say.”

“—It was either racist or homophobic.” He says rather blankly, casually scratching the scruff on his neck.

Surprised, she feels a little hot in her face and she flutters her eyelashes. “How-... how’d you know?”

He snorts with a sharp shrug as he stretches his long arms, cracking in his shoulder and neck a little. “Had a feelin’… He’s oozing with closed mindedness, toxic masculinity, bigotry…” He looks as if he’s going to go on and on, but seeing her distraught expression, he suddenly stops and clears his throat before quietly mumbling under his breath, “... Ya get the idea…”

“Well…” She says with a fake grin, lightly smacking his thigh before standing up and heading back over to the counter. “I’ll let your imagination answer that one for you then....”

As soon as she reaches the counter to start cleaning her mess, he gives her a pointed look. Just staring, waiting for her to crack. Yet, she doesn’t budge, cleaning up the used ingredients, purposely not looking at him.

Shaking his head slightly he snorts, “..... You really aren't gonna tell me, are you?”

Finally, she meets his eyes, pressing her lips together hard and shaking her head too. “.... No…. Sorry. Maybe later.”

The mountain man grumbles, obviously wanting to know, burning a hole through her face.

Realizing that she wasn’t going to get away with ending it like that, Rhemi huffs, and she pauses her cleaning for a moment with a large exhale through her nose. “.... Let’s just say... It wasn’t very nice of him to say. But it wasn’t the worst thing either… I-... I guess—Look! The most important thing is that I took my father aside immediately and I told him not to talk to my friends like that again.”

“.... Okay.” Muriel says with an unsatisfied shrug. “Kinda vague. But okay.”

The unsurprised expression on his face about her father being so rude somehow makes her heart sink and quickly she just goes on the defensive. “Bu-But Charlès is apparently a very conservative country. He…. He’s just a product of his surroundings! It doesn’t make him a bad person or anything!... I-I’m sure my father just needs some time to-…. to get to know everyone. Once he knows how awesome all of you are, and how amazing the wedding will be, he’ll apologize! I really think I can change his mind...”

The hermit’s expression melts into more of a remorseful one as after she utters that. Sometimes she could be so naive, she at least selfware of that about herself, but this takes the cake. But worst of all, he knows that she’s wiser than that.

“N-..... Not everyone is able to change Rem. Sometimes… People don’t want to.” He softly mutters.

“Well, I-….. I know I can change his mind.” She remarks with such a bullheaded tone and flaring her nostrils as she scrubbs the glass with a potion to make the glass sparkle and shine.

Poor Muriel didn’t know how to follow up with that. When Rhemi made up her mind about things like this, there was no coming back from it. At least for the time being. Best to let it go for now. He thinks to himself and shutting his mouth and grumbles to himself.

With the front counter now nice, shiny, and sparkling clean, Rhemi stands there, admiring her work. And the two of them then remain silent for about a minute, Muriel fiddles with a green shirt, while Rhemi plays with a piece of her hair. The softness of the ends always makes her soothe her when her mind is troubling her. She knows all too well that she needs to mention what her father requested before the day is over. This was going to be the hardest thing to discuss. Martin will be expecting an answer by tomorrow.

Clearing her throat to break the silence, Rhemi grabs Muriel’s attention once again and he looks up at her dainty face. “Also…. Before I left to come here…. My father asked me something….”

“What’s that?” Muriel asks, happy that she broke the deafening awkward silence.

“He…. He asked if we’d…. move to Charlès with him…. So we can be closer to him… Be a family again.”

“T-To- ….To Charlès?! ..... To stuck-up city central??” Muriel raises an eyebrow, then slowly sputters into a little laughter, folding his arms and pressing his back to the couch. “Funny…” Surely, she wasn’t being serious. Right?

Rhemi’s glances over to Muriel without the faintest smile, completely serious, conflicted even. His amused smile drops into an almost disgusted sneer as his eyes widen feeling his heart drop.

“You're joking… right?” He mumbles. “..... Please tell me you are.”

“Afraid not….” She mumbles back, tossing the rag that she was using to clean the counter to the back room to wash it later.

This can’t be happening. He thinks to himself. The first answer that comes to his mind is, ‘Hell FUCKIN’ no!’. Part of him really wants to shout that on the top of his lungs. But it’s hard to yell or get mad when she has such a sad pouty look on her face.

With a large exhale, he scratches his neck pondering hard, he finally utters. “Well..... what do you want to do?.... Do you want to go?”

Rhemi sighs heavily, plopping upper body onto the glass counter. This is going to be such a tough conversation, probably the toughest one they’ve had yet. God only knows how much the man hates change. “I…. I dunno. It didn't occur to me what would happen after all of this…. Until yesterday, all I was worried about was the wedding… But now?.....I-…. I just don’t know.”

“.... Do you even remember that place?”

“No… not really.” She huffs.

“Hmpf.....” He quietly grumbles as he scowls, staring at the opposite wall. “... Una and Gilbert didn’t ask us to stay with them in the south—”

“—Una and Gilbert aren’t your parents, Mur.” Rhemi snaps without thinking and her brow furrows. How did I know he wasn’t going to be happy about this…. She ponders to herself feeling so stressed.

Muriel glances back at with a bit of pain in his eyes, making her regret her words. Perhaps she shouldn’t have said it like that. “Sorry...” She mumbles.

“.... Still… I think that’s a lot to ask when you barely know this guy… We just met him yesterday.”

“I…. I know….” Unbeknownst to her, her face grows even sadder looking, and Muriel can’t help but soften his gaze.

Perhaps what she said was a bit harsh, but it is true. Una and Gilbert aren’t his parents. However, Martin is her father, and seems to be the only biological kin she has left. But to ask for them to relocate hundreds of miles away across the sea? It all seems ridiculous. But…. Now that he thinks about it, if Muriel’s family in the south did ask for them to stay, Rhemi would have gone along with it without question. She always strives for his happiness, even if it means moving into a forieign culture and living as a nomad. Muriel wanted to see her happy too. She deserves it…

Obviously this is very sudden for the poor girl too, it’s a lot to process and being inflexible and stubborn really won’t help at all with the stress she’s under. Might even make her resent him if he doesn’t even slightly consider it. The timing couldn't be any worse for all of this to come about. But that’s life apparently, riddled with constant inconveniences and irritations.

Stepping out of his comfort zone is one thing, but a new bustling city filled with homophobes across the Salty Sea is another. He just got back to normal society just a year ago, and this city was small compared to the capital there. At least people here are for the most part respectful to the tall mountain man. Who knows what kind of treatment he’ll get in Charlès… This is all just so frightening…

Muriel glances back up at his bride, seeing her pretty face as she pounders about this conviction herself, looking so torn and unsure. The unknown might be terrifying, and slightly unbearable for Muriel…. But in the end, Rhemi was always worth it. He could imagine his life without her, neither did he care to think about it.

Maybe the asshole wouldn’t be so bad once he’s back home in his normal surroundings. He uncharacteristically thinks to himself (optimism has finally rubbed off on him). That was her home… Perhaps she misses it there more than he’s letting on….. I don’t want to be selfish…

The hermit huffs standing to his feet slowly trundling over to where she’s standing. He takes both her hands in his staring down at them, lovingly stroking them with his thumbs. “B-But…. if you wanted to go... I’ll come with you no matter what… I want to see you happy… EvenifthatmeansmovingtoSnobfuckin’City.” He quickly mutters that last part.

Picking up her slumped body off of the countertop she looks into Muriel’s green eyes and he gazes back. She could tell what he said was genuine and from his heart, and a soft love drunk smile overtook her face.

He shrugs with a gripe looking expression. “.... Might not like it, but… I want you to be happy…. Home is with you…. And I love you.” He adds with a cute, but smugiush grin.

She quickly runs around the counter and leaps into his arms, and wraps her arms around Muriel’s neck peppering him with kisses on his stubbled cheek. After she’s had her fill, she rests her forehead against his with a goofy smile.

“Thank you, Muriel.” Rhemi mutters. As Muriel sets her feet back down to the floor, his hands now resting on her small waist, her hands on his abdominal muscles; her expression so relieved, yet still, she’s still unsure. “It means so much for you to say that. It really does…. But I just don’t know if I want to go. I mean…. Will we even be happy there?... I know nothing about that place anymore! What if we move there and it’s terrible? What if Inanna can’t be with us? What if there isn’t any forest around to get away from everything?...”

Pausing for a moment to ponder on, she takes this time to adjust his shirt, using her hand to flatten the wrinkles she created. “... Vesuvia is all I really know. It’s my home… Our home. We grew up here. Our friends are here. I… I don’t think I want to settle somewhere else.” Muriel takes his right hand on her jawline, stroking it sweetly with his thumb as he continues to listen.

She places her hand on top of his and words start to flow out of her mouth freely like a river, no hesitation or conflict at all. “Muri. I want to start our family here….. I… I want us to raise our children here. I want them to be free to learn whatever interests them and be whoever they want to be. I don’t want to leave the home we made in the woods nor the shop. And worst of all, we’d be even further from your family in the Steppe! Our children wouldn't have any exposure to their heritage! That wouldn't be fair at all!”

Finally, Rhemi pulls away, an endearing determined and confident expression now on her face. The answer is clear as day to her now. Holding both of his hands in hers and glances up to meet his green gaze. “... Ya know what? I’ve made up my mind… I’m happy you’re willing to change things just for my sake. But I don’t want to go either…. My father just has to understand that we just belong in Vesuvia. Perhaps instead, we can just visit Charlès every so often.”

Relieved at her decision, Muriel lets the tension in his body unwind, overjoyed to know that they are on the same page about it. “We can do that.” He says with a cute grin.

“E-.... Even if you don’t like him?” She says a little quieter, guiding his hands to wrap around her waist again, her eyes reminiscent of a puppy’s.

With a snort he slowly leans down matching her volume and squeezes her body affectionately. “..... Even if I don’t like him.”

“Even if you hate Charlès?” She mutters just above a whisper, now standing on her tippy toes inching closer and closer to his lips again, her fingers grazing his bottom lip.

“Even if I hate that place.” He replies sweetly back, starting to melt into her touch.

She smiles cutely and kisses his cheek. “I love you, Muri.”

“I love you too… But I’m never gonna call you Rhemielia. Even if it’s your ‘real’ name.”

“Okay. What are you gonna call me then?” She asks with a flirtatious laugh.

He matches her smiles, showing his teeth sweetly and runs his fingers through her hair. “Well... Was hoping, ‘my wife’ in less than two weeks.” He chuckles, but as soon as he utters that he stiffens and red stains across his cheek and smacks his forehead with his other hand. “—I blame you for this! Your awful corny humor is rubbing off on me…” He says so incredibly embarrassed, but Rhemi smiles wide and stupidly, loving his embarrassed face.

“Alright, that did it—”

Rhemi pushes Muriel to the velvet couch and he plops to a seat. “D-...Did what?”

“... Made me want to give you your dessert before dinner~” She says as she drops to her knees in front of him.

Muriel makes a shaky, yet lustful exhale feeling an erection blossoming as she rubs his large legs. Sluggishly making her way up to undo his belt buckles and her offers no hesitation as she pulls down his trousers. The saliva pools behind her teeth as his large cock sprouts out, eager to taste him.

“And what about your dessert—ahhhh, fuckkk~” He grunts at the end of his sentence just as Rhemi licks the shaft of his large hard member.

“Tee-hee~ You don’t think this is a treat for me? Mmmmm~”

“Rem, R-Rem…” He whispers, running his fingers through her burgundy hair as she teases the tip with her tongue. “Wha—…. what if Asra comes back?”

She smiles and flicks her wrist to the door, laying her head on his thigh, slowly stroking his fat cock with her other hand. “There. I added another spell, and I think he’ll get the message.” She reassures him as she continues to go back to work on kissing, licking and sucking his fat cock. Slowly, he begins to relax more and more and takes off his green long sleeved shirt, feeling a bit warm despite this cool afternoon. The hermit now practically melted into the velvet couch, sluggishly thrusting his hips with each stroke.

Glancing into his mossy green eyes, Rhemi reveles in his vulnerable horny expression. “You’re so cute when you make that face, Muri.” She utters breathily.

She can feel him shutter as the skin on his face turns to a dark red, showing that classic Muriel embarrassed expression that she also loved. “.....S-Stop being so hot!” He grumbles trying to sound grumpy as he stares right into her crimson eyes as she continues to lick his fat cock as if it were a piece of tangy tasting hard candy.

She stops for a moment and giggles with a devilishly mischievous grin and teases his testicles. “Why? Does it make you wanna cum even more?~.”

Cocking his head back and closing his eyes, he almost grits through his teeth as his pelvis thrusts from pleasure. “Fuuuuuck, Rem! Damn… Why do you gotta say that??”

“Tee-hee~ Cause it turns you on. And makes your dick harder.” She mutters before licking the very tip of his cock in small circles making him groan even more.

As Rhemi takes him into her mouth again, enjoying the salty taste of his precum as she sucks him off making cute little moans, enjoying every moment pleasuring him. Muriel’s breathing starts to become shallower and shallower as he becomes infused with the velvet couch, trying his best to stifle the moans and groans seeping out of his mouth.

Suddenly, a very lewd and interesting idea pops into Rhemi’s mind as her mind somehow wanders into the book she was reading recently (The Magic of Kama Sutra and Other Passionate Ways to Love. A book from Nopal). It was apparently rather common practice, and it seemed to have been very enjoyable for the man.

“I think I have an idea…. Can I try it out?” She whispers looking up so adorably with her large crimson eyes.

Muriel bits his lower lip and silently nods his head in agreement and Rhemi smiles, wiggling her hips like she does when she gets excited. Slowly she unbuttons her shirt, keeping her corset belt on, showcasing her plump naked breasts. The way they make them pop out is amazing and Muriel can’t believe his eyes right now. Every time she takes off her top, it’s like looking at her for the first time. His body is shaky, breathless, face hot and heart beating. Blowing hot air out his mouth, unable to control his staring as she caresses his heavy legs and starts to kiss and lightly nibble his inner thighs.

“Th- th- that is not fair!” He whimpers.

A hard but hot groan creeps out of his mouth, contrary to what he says, he always loves it when she kisses him there.

She starts to stroke him with her right hand and lifts her head, raising an eyebrow. “Since when do either of us play fair?” Lubing up his cock by licking his large shaft from bottom up to the very tip, Rhemi sluggishly pulls away, and keeps her tongue sticking out her tongue, letting hermit see the saliva oozing out of her mouth. He can’t help but shiver at the sight, making his dick twitch and his brow beads with sweat.

“God...damn—..... You’re so beautiful.” He says so sweetly as his fingers lace through her soft brownish red hair.

“Tell me if this feels good, ok?” She whispers sensually, tucking her hair behind her ear so it doesn’t get in the way. Nesting his cock in between her large breasts, she presses them together with both of her hands and starts to move her torso as she sucks on the very tip.

“This—This… is….. Really…. different…” He struggles to get out, unable to think straight, face burning hot.

“Do…. you not like it?” She asks while coming up for air, pausing for a moment to ensure he was happy.

A hard snort rolls out of his mouth and he slowly shakes his head. “D-.... Didn’t say that….” He mutters with a cute sexy chuckle, his hips twitching and moving on their own, seemingly enjoying watching as his member moves between her tits.

“Good~” She whispers back with a smirk, going straight back to business, pressing her boobs together around his cock and stuffing the tip in her mouth.

The more she continued, the more difficult it was to keep his mind straight. Only able to keep his thoughts on the marvelous sensation in between his legs. Her little muffled moans make it harder and harder to keep himself from exploding. Then, on the verge of it all, Rhemi gives him a sweet glance upwards and their eyes meet; her expression so lewd, yet so loving and sweet. Suddenly, Muriel throws back his head, shutting his eyes tightly and a loud hot groan emanates from his lungs and his fingers dig into the velvet cushions of the couch and warm liquid erupts like a volcano everywhere.

What. A. Fucking. Mess.

The thick white goop is everywhere. In her hair, all over her chest and hands, on her face and even dripping down her lips. Both of them were a little surprised at the messy result.

A look of horror suddenly strikes poor Muriel’s face, every visible inch of his flesh is red and hot with embarrassment. “Ah shit! I-... I’m sor--”

Rhemi silences his unneeded apology as she takes her finger and licks up the cum off of it giving him a lustful expression. “Well…. Someone really enjoyed his dessert~” She mutters sweetly rather enjoying herself.

Absolutely dumbfounded, the poor man just stares at her lost for words, but now his face is red for a different reason entirely.

Muriel comes back rather quickly with a towel and sheepishly hands it to her, not very sure how he feels about the mess he made. But as Rhemi wipes the cum off her tits, she smiles looking rather pleased with herself, and somehow it makes his desire for her all over again.

“Sooo. Whatcha thinkin’ for dinner?” Rhemi asks, getting the last of the cum off her face, slightly changing her tune.

Silent, Muriel comes from behind and crouches down to her level wrapping his arms tenderly around her waist. Tenderly, he starts to pepper her neck with passionate kisses, slowly caressing her breasts and feeling her warm skin.

“That isn’t an answer!” She teases, but she leans into his touch and giggles cutely.

“... You sound pretty good right now…” He sweetly whispers in her ear, then nibbles on her shoulder and reaches for her folds through her pants.

Before she could think of something to say, a deeply sensual moan escaped her lips and her legs grew weak. The feeling of his teeth lightly her flesh and his fingers rubbing in between her thighs makes her mind go completely blank. All she could think about was how much she loved his gentle touch and the way he groans makes her go crazy with lust. He then starts to unfasten her pants.

“What are you doin’?~” She mumbles, rearing her to look at him, biting her lower lip and running her fingers through his dark hair. Catching that sexy primal look in his eyes when he wants to fuck her.

Without another word, he scoops her up, placing her backwards on the couch, sitting on her knees and hands naturally holding the back of it. He pulls down the back of her pants, he starts to kiss her shoulders, her spine and works his way down all the way to her hips. She feels him pull down his trousers, exposing his erect member yet again.

Not the slightest hint of hesitation, she arches her back feeling herself becoming hot and wet, opening her legs to invite him in. He takes a moment and exhales a hot air as he marvels at her beauty, caressing her body with one hand, stroking his cock with the other. He then licks his right middle and ring figure, lubing her pussy, rubbing her folds and fucking her with his finger. His warm digits send little electric shocks waves from her clit as he pulls in and out of her now soaking entrance. Her body now feeling light and aroused, her breathing more shallow, sexy, and airy, she turns around her upper body with a begging expression on her face. “F-Fuck, Muri…” She mutters.

Unable to withhold himself a moment longer, Muriel lines himself up with Rhemi’s hips and slowly enters her tight pussy with his knee resting on the couch, both hands gripping her ass. The two now start to get into a rhythm, thrusting their hips faster and harder and enjoying pleasurable sensations and wet fleshly sounds.

Feeling him go deeper and harder, their grunt and moans start to increase as well. Rhemi’s hand braces the top of the couch, while the other reaches round to hold his wrist wanting to hold him closer. Muriel then takes his arm and wraps it around her neck holding her to his chest, carefully bracing her so he doesn’t choke her, just restraining her.

A startled grunt and her stiff body pulls him back to his senses and he  Afraid that he might be too aggressive with her. “....This ok?” He whispers.

But to his surprise, she holds her hands on his forearm, putting it back to where it was and she thrusts her hips down onto his cock even more. Loving this new position, she softly says. “D-... Don’t stop!.... I like it when you hold me.”

Allowing himself to get swept up in the moment yet again, he holds her jawline turning towards him and kisses her hard, their tongues dancing behind their lips muffling her moans as he fucks her harder, pressing her against the back of the couch.

Feeling her face becoming warm, her body tingly, the pressure building behind her abdominal muscles like a damn about to burst, spirially into an orgasim. “Muri!~” She moans, holding his forearm even tighter as she pants faster and faster. “....I-.... I wanna cumm~”

“S-... Shit….” He grunts, losing his mind at her words, feeling himself get closer as well. “Feels good?” He asks, matching her volume as he moves his free hands to her left tit to squeeze it.

She nods, closing her eyes, moaning even louder as she reaches her right hand and pulls his hair. “D-..Do-...Don’t st-...stop… Please! Don’t stop!” Her voice is now even higher pitched and breathless, and repeats over and over again. Rhemi’s body starts to slightly convulse, cumming hard and she lets out a loud and sharp moan and shouts Muriel’s name. Her body now feeling so light and relaxed, she starts to struggle keeping herself upright as Muriel fucks her stright through her oragsim.

Feeling his cock growing ever larger and harder inside of her, she can feel her walls clenching around him as he buries his face into her neck. Grunting and panting he keeps going until finally pumps her insides with his thick white paint then his hips come to a slow stop.

The two of them melt into the couch feeling satisfyingly weak and breathless still holding onto one another and catching their breaths.

Finally they both regain their strength. Muriel pulls himself out taking a seat on the couch while Rhemi manages to stand to her feet. Feeling like a newborn calf, with her shaky legs, she first pulls her pants and underwear back on, then threads her arms back through her shirt and buttons it back up. Dressed and appropriate again, she comes back over to her mountain man and wraps her arms around his neck and he buries his face into her hair, his hand falling to the small of her back.

“You still never told me what you want for dinner…” She suddenly says rather seriously.

Muriel pulls away and the two just stare at each other blankly, waiting for the other to crack. But they both are circum with laughter at the same time, placing their foreheads together.

________________________

The two quickly clean themselves off to look presentable, lock up the shop and head to the market before the twilight. Finally coming to the decision of rice, beef, and zucchini for supper. Getting everything they needed, they set home to the forest holding each other's hand. After the two made dinner and started to settle down for the night, they found themselves still hungry for one another. Lighting candles and some soothing incense to set the mood, the two go at it as if the world would end if they’d stop.

Finally, after getting both of their fill, feeling utterly pleasantly exhausted, the two catch their breaths on the bed. As Rhemi continues to straddle Muriel’s hips, she reaches her arms up for a good stretch and yawns, making her tits jiggle and bounce around.

“Ya know…” She says mid yawn, then starts again when she finishes. “...We probably shouldn’t have sex again till our honeymoon. So we don’t spoil the night.” She suggests while stroking his bare chest with both hands, pressing her breast together.

Muriel's nose crinkles as he snorts hard, gawking at her plump tits, she isn’t all that convincing currently. “..... Are you expecting me to take you seriously while you're on top of me naked?”

“Muri! I am serious!” She giggles, leaning down and resting her arms on his pecks, realizing herself just now.

The hermit rolls his eyes and sighs with a smirk and plays with a piece of her hair. “.... Fine… I guess you have a point.”

“... Can you believe we’re about to be married in just a few short days?”

“.... Sometimes I can’t… But in a good way… I didn’t think I’d ever be this happy in my life honestly…. You… you changed my life, Rem.”

The corner of her mouth curls up into a bright and loving smile and she places a few sweet kisses onto his chin. “You changed mine too…. I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with you…” She whispers, getting lost into his green gaze.

“Neither can I.” He whispers back, looking deep into her eyes and holds her cheek before pulling her head down for another passionate kiss, pressing his tongue to her's.

A familiar scratch at the door pulls them out of the moment, setting them back into reality and Rhemi rolls off grabbing the blankets and rolling up into them for warmth

“... Inanna home.” Muriel grunts as he gets up, quickly donning his underwear as he travels to the door, the wolf still clawing at the door. As he opens the door, the beast scurries in, tongue out happily wagging her tail as she hops onto the bed and drowning Rhemi in her sloppy wet kisses.

“Hey, Nana!” Rhemi giggles, hugging her neck and scratching her fur. “Guess what? We got you some steak tonight!”

With the word, steak, the wolf hops down excitedly and nearly looks as if she dances on the floor as Muriel fetches it. Still wrapped in paper, he delicately unwraps it and places it on a plate along with a few berries and even a little green garnish on it. Her yellow eyes hilariously huge, her tail thumping so hard on the ground completely overjoyed; Yet she's sitting as still as possible, eagerly awaiting for Muriel to place it on the floor. As soon as he puts it down, she makes very quick work of her food, licking the plate clean.

The three eventually crawl into bed to get warm, happily snuggling all together like they always do. One by one they all start to become comfortable and slowly drift off to sleep.

———————————————

Feeling himself leave his body, Muriel soon comes to realize that he’s entering a deep sleep. Equipped with claws, teeth, fur and all. Dreams have never been the same since Rhemi and him read that book about the Aurora. Most of the time he turns into a bear. Tonight he seems to be somewhere in the Steppe again, but no one else is in sight. Just other animals, the sky, and the sun. Going about his peaceful slumber, he just sits there on his hind legs, enjoying the brisk wind on his muzzle.

Soon, he realizes isn’t alone for long, sensing someone's prying eye behind him, a peaceful dream yet again short lived. Turning slowly and cautiously behind him, ready for whatever awaited him, he’ll attack if he must.

“Hello, my little cub.” That familiar deep voice says coming from a large dark bear.

Right before his eyes, Muriel can’t believe who is in front of him. It’s Artturi, his father. Or at least his cast.

"How…. How can this be?" He thinks as he stares confused at the large animal with such kind eyes. "How can he be here?"

The larger bear snorts in amusement, and turns around to walk away.

"Wait!" A large desperate growl escapes Muriel’s jaws and stomps the ground. "Don’t go! Please!"

Muriel’s father pauses for a moment, cranks his head around and nods in the direction, signaling to follow him.

Relieved, Muriel galaps next to him, a million questions filling his head. What’s worse, in the dream realm, in this bear form, he is incapable of speaking and frustrates the poor hermit even more.

Finally, Arrturi stops at a seemingly random area in the plain. Feeling the large bear’s magic bubble up, a strange portal suddenly appears, opening up into somewhere else. It felt so strange. Usually, Muriel just wakes up into other people’s dreams. He had to wake up in order to leap into another one. But this seemed to be leaping mid dream.

His father glances over with his small green eyes. Somehow he smiles at him. Even in this animal form, he manages to give his son a warm and loving smile.

Softly, Arrturi closes his eyes and enters the portal, once on the other side.

Wary, Muriel studies the portal up and down, even sniffing it with his large nose.

“It’s safe, my boy. I assure you.” His father says. He never once moves his lips or jaws, yet his son can hear his words as if they were being spoken out-loud by a human.

Unconvinced, Muriel stares at his father with heavy suspicion. Maybe this is just his own dream. His self-consciousness just wanting to see his father again.

“Oi! Come along, my little cub! Don’t have all night!” His father says, raising his eyebrows and sounding a bit more serious.

Well… What do I have to lose? With a deep and grumpy huff, Muriel cautiously steps into the portal, one limb at a time as if he was just entering a door.

Once inside, the doorway disappears leaving the two Kokhurians alone in the forest.

“How… How did you do that?” Muriel attempts to ask, but all that comes out are brudish grunts and growls. Making that grumpy irritated sulk, he grumbles feeling so frustrated with his lack of understanding.

“There is much you have to learn, my cub.” His father whispers.

“Y-.... You can hear me? Understand…. Me?” He replies.

His father laughs softly, tenderly nuzzles Muriel’s face with his snout. “Of course I can! I’m a bear too!” His laugh sounds so much like Gilbert’s, his voice filled of heart and joy. Out of instinct, Muriel’s ears tuck down and he sheepishly shrinks into his shoulders, as his father continues to nuzzle him. He can feel his face turning red underneath all that fur, some things apparently never change. Even in the realm of dreams. Still, even if he was uncomfortable, his father’s affection was appreciated and welcomed, he wouldn’t dare pull away.

Suddenly, his father’s magic emerges again, another portal opening, his father walks into it, his son follows. “We call travel in our sleep, my cub. Most of the time, people have no control where their dreams can take them. But us leapers can travel into countless place and dreams each time we lay our heads down to rest. No matter where in the world they are. Sometimes, people can call for us. Especially when they need it most…. Other times, we can enter people’s deepest part of their consciousness--”

“—NO!! MUMMY!!!!” Rhemi’s voice suddenly screams, it sounds rather distant, it even echoes. Panic takes over the hermit’s mind, looking around blindly to find where it’s coming from.

She’s in trouble, and he knows it.

Muriel sadly glances over to his father, torn between the two. He doesn’t want to leave his father, who knows when he'll ever see him again. But Rhemi… She sounds like she could be in a lot of trouble…

Without another thought, Arrturi opens another portal. The doorway opened up into a foggy area stinging of smoke and ash, Rhemi’s essence inside.

“I… We… I’m sor—”

“—It’s fine, little cub. We’ll meet again. I promise....” Muriel can’t help but stand there gawking at his father, tears pooling in his eyes. “Go!” His father orders. “She needs you, son.”

--------------———————————————-----------

Slowly Rhemi can feel her body becoming limp and falling into a deep sleep. Soon, her consciousness floats away somewhere to the realm of dreams. Muriel nowhere in sight. In fact, nothing is in sight, just an empty black void. Just very distant voices and dim light up ahead of her just like a spotlight duringJulian’s shows in the theater.

Most of it at first is incoherent bantering, but then two voices start to speak more clearly. One of them sounds so sweet and comforting, her voice silky and soothing. But they speak with such urgency in their voice. Afraid even.

“No!! Don’t take her away from me! Please! She makes my life worth living! PLEASE! I beg of you...”

“.... What are you willing to give for her then?”

The sweet and gentle voice continues on muttering desperately to the ghostly figure, but nearly impossible to make out what she’s saying.

Is… is this spector Phara?... And if that's Phara… then who’s this woman? Why do I feel like I know her?

Soon, Rhemi notices the woman’s beautiful long dirty blonde wavy hair that curls at the ends. She wore a fancy gown decorated with flowers and foliage embroidery with cool colors. Her back was turned to her, but then she immediately had a gut feeling who she was.

“.... M-Mum??” Rhemi quietly whispers, but the words echo around as if she screamed into a vast canyon and the word rang everywhere like a large bell.

The woman slowly turns her body around, but shadows still obscuring her features on her face except for her lips. “R-..... Rhem—”

Flames violently erupted all around Rhemi and a wicked laughter that belonged to that dark figure. Terrified, she spins back around towards her mother reaching out for her. “Take my hand!” She cries out to the woman.

But her mother instead lets out a horrible scream as the dark shadowy figure sneaks from behind her covering her mouth with sharp claws for hands. All Rhemi could see was the figure’s bright green eyes and sharp toothy grin as they continued to chuckle evilly. Then claws rip into her chest and her mother convulses with pain, her awful screams muffled by the creature’s other hand.

“MUM!!!”

The creature finally releases her mother and she drops to the ground on all fours and the dark creature disappears with an evil cackle only banshees would envy. “RHEMI!!” Her terrified voice echoes in her daughter’s ears.

Helpless. Powerless. Rhemi can only watch as her own mother’s eye’s turn cold black like a doll’s. The veins in her face turn dark, her skin gray and pale as she transforms into something else. Something inhuman. Her cries start to morph into something that of an animal, her once beautiful silky calm voice becomes incomprehensible and shril. Then in a flash, her mother is whisked away without a trace.

“NO!! MUMMY!!!!” Rhemi cries out again, she wants to go and find her, but her feet refuse to budge. I’m alone again… Why am I always alone??

The fire continues to take hold of the young magician’s surroundings, lighting up the once dark stage. Now it is unveiling fancy furniture that has been overturned, broken vases and paintings litter the floor of what looks to be a home with green floral wallpaper. Brick by brick the walls form around her starting from the bottom and forming it’s way to the very top, attempting to trap her inside. I—I have to get out! I have to get out of here!!!

“No…. Noooo!” Desperate, Rhemi bursts into colorful flames sprouting her feathers, talons, and beak before the walls enclose all around her. Flapping her wing so hard, it almost hurts she frantically soars to the top. The high vaulted ceiling and crystal chandler nearly get in her way as she struggles to get out of the now nearly assembled roof. Only a narrow gap is left and she squeezes herself into the tight space.

As she looks back down at the building, the roof is enclosed as fire reaches the top to burn it down once again.

This is just a dream! This is just a bad dream!!! Rhemi can feel tears forming in her eyes and she chokes them down. She watches in dismay as the mansion stands there and that muggy dense fog rolling in all around her. Without a second thought she turns around, flapping her wings hard to get away from that place.

I don’t want to see it! I know what happened! I don’t need to relive this! You need to wake up!

Out of the corner of her right eye, Rhemi sees a fast and furious luminescent looking wad of ash and feathers headed straight for her.

Without any hesitation, the dying phoenix crashes into Rhemi mid air, like a falcon catching its prey, making them both tumble into the smog, pinning her to the ground. “WHY. DID. YOU. RUN, RHEMI?!?”

“GET THE FUCK OFF OF ME!!” She struggles to get out as she tries to push the rotten smelling bird away.

She wiggles and squirms but it's all for not, as the dark version of herself pins her down, such anger and frustration in her voice. “WHAT ARE YOU DOING?? You need to remember! You were almost there!!!” The other Rhemi growls with her tired gravelly voice, the smell of soot and decay overwhelming her senses. Their fiery wings burn hot and angry as she pushes Rhemi into the ground even more.

“What the fuck do you want from me?! WHY CAN’T YOU JUST LEAVE ME ALONE??” Rhemi shouts as she pushes the ghosts of her former self off of her.

Stumbling backwards, both of them transform back into their mirrored human forms, but the other Rhemi looks even weaker, and sicker than before. Staring at Rhemi with her bloodshot eyes, and bright orange glowing irises, she mutters as she slightly pants, apparently out of breath. “I’ve told you before....You need to see the truth.”

Standing back onto her feet Rhemi stomps with her left foot and puffs out her chest. “Yeah! Well Père already told me about it! I already know what happened! I know the truth…. Or at least part of it!--And ya know what!?? That’s fine with me!”

“Could you stop being an idiot?!... Just because you were told what happened doesn’t mean you dealt with it, Rhemi!”

“—What if I don’t want to deal with it??” The figure just stares at her blankly with her terrible bloody eyes and Rhemi shakes her arms wildly. “I am happy!—Okay?? Finally happy!!!! No bad dreams, no terrible memories for months!!—I have a father now!! I just want it to be what it is!! A family of my own!! I’m getting married in less than two weeks!!!—Don’t you understand?? I want to stay happy!!!... Why can’t you just go away?? Please just leave me be!!! You are supposed to be dead!!”

Her previous self just stands there, blankly staring at her slowly shaking her head, completely exhausted. “.... You’re the one who keeps me here, Rhemi….”

“... What??”

“... If you call all this happiness,” She says laughing sadistically pointing at her then to the mansion. “... Then you really have a warped perception of it. Quit lying to yourself. You still need to know about the monster…. you need to remember who they are...”

“I don’t want to meet any more monsters! Why does this even matter?? Phara is gone!”

The spectrum suddenly shifts and appears right in front of her nearly inches away and Rhemi shutters hard, feeling throat dry up. The other Rhemi just stands there staring her right in the eyes. ".... Because the monster lives, Rhemi.” A bone chilling silence takes its icy grip as her words sink in. “... And that monster is closer than you think it is.”

Muriel lets out a large growl and the other Rhemi glances behind, not very stirred by his presence, but more deeply annoyed. “Damn it, Blanket-boy. You always come at the wrong time…..” She mumbles under her breath then turns her eyes back to her. “You need to know the truth… Before it’s too late.”

“Why??.... What’s gonna happen??”

A sharp scream emanates from the dark smog and the sick Rhemi cranks her neck around towards that direction. Then a viscous growl from the other with a charging bear who it belongs to.

The sickly spirit grabs Rhemi by the shirt and pulls her closer, nose nearly touching and her blood red eyes stare deeply into Rhemi’s. “...Remember for it’s too late.” She roughly whispers then pushes her away, as fire engulfs her body, transforming her into that dying phoenix once again.

“Oh yeah, NOW YOU LEAVE?!?!” Rhemi shouts, stomping her right foot irritatedly and Muriel finally reaches over to her, still in his bear form.

As he approaches her they both watch as the smoldering bird flies away until she disappears into the dark and dense fog.

Muriel looks up at his soon to be wife and just glares at her. Even in this form, she could tell he was upset with her, and rightfully so… She hadn’t been necessarily honest for some time.

———————————

As both Muriel and Rhemi return to their bodies, they simultaneously awake. Muriel however was the first to sit up and he rubs his tired eyes.

Slowly, Rhemi wipes away the tears that formed when she was asleep before he can see and pick up her trunk off the mattress, listening to the crickets and other night creatures sing their songs before finally parting her lips. “Muriel… I—”

With a sharp exhale, the hermit just draws down the sheet and gets out of bed and starts the fire again before she can try and explain herself. He’s rarely ever angry with her, but when he is, he’s very quiet at first. But this was the first time he actually walked away from her. He’s really upset…

Inanna whimpers as she looks back and forth between the two of them waiting for one of them to budge, yet nothing. Finally, annoyed with all the tension, she nudges Rhemi’s arm three times, each one harder than the next, telling her, or rather, demanding her that she needed to make the first move. She stares at her with her large intelligent yellow eyes, snorting and sneezing, her point obviously being made. With a heavy heartfelt sigh, she slowly gets out of the bed grabbing the top blanket and wrapping around her shoulders, silently approaching her sweetheart. She sits next to him by the fire, a few feet away to give him space; they both sit there for a moment.

“I… I was going to tell you….” She finally says just above a whisper, breaking the terrible silence.

“........You said….. you’d tell me…. When you had a bad nightmare.” Muriel says softly, but very firmly. He’s so upset.

Rhemi adjusts the blanket over her shoulders and flutters her tired eyes, carefully thinking of what to say next. “.... I…. I didn’t know how to bring it up…”

With a sharp rumbly noise, Muriel shakes his right hand dismissively, his twisted face and eyes glaring at her. “Don’t give me that!”

Rhemi shifts awkwardly, eyes averted to the other side of the room, feeling like she's being scolded. He’s actually hard to look at without wanting to cry.

Muriel shakes his head and his eyes drop down to his lap. “...... I-..... I’ve asked, and asked, and you said you were fine….. How long has that- that thing been coming into your dreams??”

She twists her foram with her opposite hand making it sting a little, but she can’t help but inflict a small bit of pain to herself. Perhaps if she did it hard enough it would make all of this go away.

“.... I… It showed up back in the Steppe… But I don’t really remember the first dream…. Then I saw them again the night of the welcoming ceremony.”

“You saw your past self back then… and you didn’t tell me?.....”

… My past self?.... How does he? She thinks to herself squinting her eyes suspiciously. “...Wait. H- H-How do you know about her?… She ran off before you even got there.”

A faint pink spreads across his cheeks and a little bead of sweat drips down his temple as she points that out and he just sits there silently. “... Muri?” She says tilting her head and slightly furrowing her brow now.

With a grumbly sigh, he finally answers.  “...... I saw them around Yule when we were traveling home. I thought it was my own bad dream… I… I didn’t realize I leaped.”

“Soooooooo….. You didn’t tell me about it.” She says a bit sassily.

“Well I—… You…. We…. There wasn’t—” Clearly, he’s now more flustered than angry now and he continues fumbling over his words. “I-... Be- Cause—..... Because… Because didn’t want to upset you about it—”

“.... And why do you think I didn’t tell you?” Rhemi tucks her legs into her chest, hugging her knees tightly like she used to do when she was upset. She hadn’t done it in a long time. She did it a lot when Asra wasn’t around “I… I wasn’t ready to talk about it…. It's like seeing yourself… in a mirror, yet the person looking back is a complete stranger… She… She scares me… Really scares me…”

Quietly, Rhemi’s words sink into Muriel’s mind, remembering that the two of them were really similar when it came to things like this. His eyes glancing over to his soon to be wife, and his heart drops to see her in this tight bundled up position. She looks like she did the night of when he saved her from that creep a few years back before they got to really know one another. It seems like a lifetime ago, but also just like yesterday. She looked so small when she hugged her knees to her chest like that.

Muriel’s shoulders relax, his large neck muscles unclench, as empathy soothes his anger. Scratching his left ear sheepishly, he scoots a little closer to her. “I’m… I’m sorry, Rem…. Shoulda realized you weren’t ready to talk about it.”

She places her chin on the top of one of her forearms as she chokes down the tears. “.... Well...  maybe I should have anyways….” Her voice cracks a bit when she starts, and she tries to clear her throat, but he knows she’s upset.

“... You’ve been nothing but patient with me when it comes to talking… and I guess I’m just not as patient….” He reaches over bringing her into his chest and with the other, he slowly takes her hand in his, lacing his large fingers with hers. “... But I’ll try to do better…” He says sincerely then kisses her temple. “I’m sorry I got angry…”

Unraveling her limbs, she tucks up closer to him, snuggling his chest. “You’re allowed to be angry, Muri…. Your feelings are valid. And you’re not wrong. It isn’t fair when I don’t communicate when you do… Perhaps… We both have things we need to work on. And… maybe it’s going to take us longer than we both anticipated.”

“Ok… We always have done better doing things together… so... I can deal with that….”

“So can I.” She whispers, wiping away a stray tear. “I love you, Muriel.”

“I love you too…” He mumbles holding her close.

A cold and wet nose however pries the two apart, Inanna squeezing into the warm laps of the two lovers next to the fire, somewhat ruining the moment. But it’s fine. Rhemi and Muriel both start to softly laugh and give the large wolf the much needed scratches as she soaks up the warmth from the fireplace.

....Eventually all three of them make their way back to bed and start to get to sleep.

Rhemi starts to dream again, but this time, it’s about Athena. It must have been when she first came to Vesuvia. Her iconic long dreadlocks are replaced with a short hair that was kept underneath a silk scarf on her head, but her facial features were unfortunately still blurred in obscurity. She apparently was in the middle of teaching her a spell, and a lovely bright teal orbe lit the dark room. The joy she felt in her chest was so genuine and full of child-like wonder…. I miss her so much. I wonder if she knows how much I loved her.

_______________________

Contrast to the day before, Rhemi takes her time traveling to the palace. Unsure how her father was going to take her answer, she fears that he might think that she hates him. But that just isn’t true. She may not really remember him from before, but she does have this feeling like she deeply wanted his approval and that she missed him. But she also has a feeling like she’s nervous about what he’s going to do. Running from what she’s going to say to let him down easily, she repeats it over and over again in her mind.

As she approaches the palace gates, she can feel her heart beating faster and faster. Why am I so nervous about this?? Everything will be fine. He’ll understand. He’ll understand.

As the palace doors open up and she proceeds to the common room, she looses herself in thought.

Suddenly, an entourage of strangers meet Rhemi near the door, all in strange clothes with too many ruffles and crinoline and stunk of powerful cologne. One man was especially snooty and uptight looking, with his puffy pants, stockings, and an obviously fake looking wig.

“Ah, you must be Rhemielia. We have been expecting you.” Says the one man in the front, wearing about an inch worth of pale make-up that made him look like a ghost in on of Julian's plays. His voice thick with a strange, yet somewhat familiar accent.

“Yesssss….” Raising an eyebrow and tilting her head, Rhemi confusingly scratches the back of her head. “Ummmmm… And whoooo are you, exactly?”

With an arrogant smile, the man turns up his nose and smiles as he puffs out his chest and presses his hand in his chest. “I am Oliver. You’re Monsieur Alarie’s personal tailor.”

“.... He brought his tailor on board with him from Charlès?”

He laughs as if she said something completely foolish as he walks around inspecting her. “But of course! I am part of his entourage, my naive little child.”

“Oh. Well, nice to meet you, but I am here for my fath-”

“Hmpf!…We must put you in something that draws your attention away from those dreadful eyes.” He interrupts looking as if he smelled something fowl, completely ignoring her.

A twinge of anger strikes her. “... Excuse me?”

“Oh! So sorry, Mademoiselle Alarie. I know that was one of the things you were left with when  that witch spirited you and your mother away.”

“.... W-.. What?? Where did you hear tha—?”

“—Ugh. You should really think about skipping your desserts my plump little darling….” He scoffs as he takes a measuring tape and measures her hips, making her shut her mouth up tight and her face turning red. Getting a measurement, he pulls out a tiny pair of reading glasses and holds them up to his eyes. As he reads the tape measure, he shakes his head, tutting condescending. “... Maybe a few meals as well.” He smirks with a chuckle, his posse chims whispering and laughing amongst themselves as they judge her, like a group of mean kids on the playground.

The color red paints poor Rhemi’s face and she feels herself shrinking into herself. Embarrassed and a bit angry, her hands held her stomach feeling so disgusting. Pierre, Nadia's tailor never made her feel like this when she was having her wedding dress made. She honestly never thought she was a bad size… til now of course with all these thin and ridiculously dressed rude assholes muttering about.

“Come, come, Mademoiselle. We don’t have all day.” Oliver says, sounding annoyed as he walks in the other direction. Then three people from his team suddenly start to grab her and push her along behind him. “...I have just the dress for you. It is the latest fashion of Charlès, many ladies of the court have worn this dress… I designed this one myself. However, I might need to let out the seams a bit to fit your large phasic.” Oliver unnecessarily adds.

The overly pompous seamstress first throws the apprentice into a room with a handful of Nadia’s women servants that she barely knew. Instead of a door, they had a divider so he could instruct them on the other side. Without a single word, or an ounce of emotion in their faces, they all proceed to just take off her clothes she wore here as if she was helpless.

‘Hey…. Back off! Don’t fucking touch me!’ Her inner thoughts scream, as they unbuckle her corset belt and take off her shoes without hesitation. But instead of fighting back like she so desperately wants, she just stands there, quietly taking it. After all, it’s not like these women were doing anything necessarily inappropriate, they were all just doing what they were told to do… But in some way, it made the girl feel rather violated. Unsure if she felt like this because of it happening so suddenly, or the fact that she was rather private about her body. Either way, it hardly mattered why she felt like this, the fact is, she did. Her fist clenches and she presses her lips into her mouth out of frustration as they strip her down to her tight pants. She could so easily make the woman stop in their tracks, freeze them with a spell, confuse them with a flash of bright light with her magic, distract them, scare them—Anything really—But against every fiber in her body, something is holding her back and she just continues to reluctantly stand there, still and as silent as a human doll as they take off her pants and throw on a white linen drawers and slip.

Oliver then throws over an ugly boned piece of tan heavy looking fabric over the divider and instructs the women to strap her into an overly tight and restrictive overbust corset and to make it as he says, “Nice and tight.”. It was terrible. Just terrible. The damn thing was too narrow in the hips. It pressed down her waist and pushed into her ribs and lifted her breasts uncomfortably into her face. Rhemi actually likes corsets, hell, she has a whole drawer full of them. But this one was nothing like the ones she has, it obviously purposely was not even her true size so she’d fit into the garments, so it was much too tight. When she verbally complained, all Oliver and his posse chuckled and said, “If you have enough air to complain, then it isn’t tight enough.” Prompting them to tighten it even more, taking the little bit of air that was left in her lower lungs and she groans and strains in pain.

After that came the strange cage thing for her hips that looked like a monstrous spider’s creation. “What's this for?” She cautiously asks while she lifts her hands over her head and they tight it to her hips.

“To make you look attractive to look at.” He snarily remarks implying as if she wasn’t already. Every question she asks, the answer seems to be another harsh comment, so now, she just fell silent, she might as well be a warm mannequin at this point.

Next, came a dozen or so stiff and unforgiving petticoats that seemed to weigh her down more and more. Even her gown from the masquerade wasn’t this bad.

After that, finally came the actual dress. It was light green, slightly off the shoulder filled with frills and bright pink bows and embellished with flowers, ruffles, and white frilly lace. To add insult to injury, Oliver came with the most uncomfortable shoes she had ever seen. This is where she drew the line. As the servant went to place her shoes on her feet, Rhemi gave her the hardest, scariest stare she could muster and she quietly shook her head, pointing to her beloved boots. Getting the message rather clearly, the servant obediently places her brown boots back on to her feet. At least she was given something. The last thing she needed was the inability to walk.

After about twenty minutes of this abuse from that asshole tailor and his team of fashion monsters, Oliver moves the divider and looks at his creation. Seeming as if she was still lacking luster, the man walked around in circles around the giant frilly dress. “It will do.” He says, pressing his finger into his cheek and sighing. “Better than those garbs, no?”

“... I like my own garbs. Thanks.” Rhemi mutters under her breath.

OIiver then overdramatically waves his hand along, shooing her away. “ If I just had another hour, I’d have you be unrecognizable. But his Excellency is waiting for you in the common room for tea before his meeting.”

“Thanks…” She says through her gritted teeth and a very fake smile, holding back all the urges to hex the literal shit out of him.

Almost running towards the common area, she tries her best to focus on the much more important things she has to deal with today. But if she’d had the chance, she might pull a good ol’ prank on the asshole.

As she finally arrives in the common area. She finds her father sitting there waiting patiently next to the fire in that green chair he sat in the day before, lost in deep thought.

Rhemi clears her throat politely making him realize that she was there. Quickly he jumps to his feet, staring at her in amazement. “Mielia… I see you meet Oliver.”

“Yes… I have… He’s… ahhh…”

“--Genius isn’t he?… He designed some of your mother’s favorite dresses back in the day. I hired him full time a few years ago after I started traveling more.”

“Oh…. he did?”

“Yes…"

For about a minute, Martin just stares at her fondly. "... That dress is wonderful on you…. You… You actually look a lot like my Mair—” He stops in his tracks and shuts his eyes as if he stutters and clears his throat. “Your Mother…. That shade of green was one of Florence’s favorite colors.” Martin says with almost the utmost sincerity, there are even tears in his eyes, warming his cold teal eyes.

“Re-...Really?” Rhemi smiles sympathetically and blushes at the compliment. She doesn’t remember much of her mother’s face, but she did know that she was very beautiful and elegant.

Martin clears his throat and averts his gaze to the couch. “... It also draws the attention away from your eyes…” Now forced to keep her smile on her lips, she feels her heart sink back into that same low spot where she was before. All the happiness of his previous compliment is voided with that remark. “... In Charlès, you’d have even more dresses such as this. This is actually nothing compared to gallas and banquet gowns.”

“Oh…. Yes…. Well, uh, 'bout that—”

“—Come along, my Pigeon. Have a seat, our tea is getting cold.”

“Oh… Okay then.”

Rhemi awkwardly walks over to the couch, unsure how to actually sit in this monstrosity of outfit. Finally, she figures out how to take a seat, but is hardly able to breathe.

Her father offers her a tea cup, willing to fill it for her, but she politely shakes her head. “Don’t want to get this dress dirty.” But really, the truth was there wasn’t a way in hell that she could even think about putting something in her body with this damn corset pressing into her torso. The tea would probably come right back up if she even tried to drink any.

Suddenly Beatrix scurries over to the same couch as Rhemi sniffing warily and tilting her head looking as if she wants something, but is too proud to ask. Catching wind of what she might have wanted, Rhemi reaches out with her hand and Beatrix sniffs her palm, surprisingly allowing her to come closer. Gently, she scratches her chin with her fingernail and the creature leans hard into her touch almost like a cat.

Amazed, Martin snorts and smiles. “Bea usually never lets anyone touch her... Except for your mother, that is… Maybe you remind her of Florence as well.”

The badger then curls up into his daughter’s lap, now practically demanding more pets and scratches, and Rhemi happily obliges. Soon, Beatrix starts to snore away on Rhemi’s lap, and she continues to pet her from head to tail. Despite her abrasive nature, her fur is surprisingly silky under her fingertips, and she enjoys the soothing texture calming her nerves. The creature really has taken a liking to her recently, she isn’t as bad as Asra thinks she is, especially after she eats.

It soon occurs to Rhemi that neither of them had spoken for a while, and things start to become awkward. The silence is almost unbearable, the ticking of the clock doesn’t help.

“So…I, ahhhh—I thought about what you asked the other day…” She finally says, her eyes still glued to the badger, petting slowly spine.

Martin picks up his teacup and saucer, hiding a small but rather pleased smile. “Oh. You have, did you?” He replies before taking a sip of his tea and there’s a rather large pause. “...Well go on, child. Don’t leave your Père in suspense.” A small chuckle rolls out of his chest as he speaks, eager to hear her answer.

The apprentice takes in a large brave breath before she finally speaks. “Yes I have… I thought about it, slept on it, talked out loud about it…. A-and….. I really love being with you…. Charlès sounds really interesting....” Her father nods slightly as speaks, so far everything she's saying is exactly what he wanted to hear. “...B-But I can’t.” She mutters quickly, a hard sting radiates through her chest like she just ripped off a bandaid.

The Archmagister stops mid-sip and his eyes fly open when she utters the word, ‘can’t’. His cold teal eyes piercing Rhemi’s warm burgundy ones, making her discomfort grow the longer he stares.

Apparently rather upset, he places his teacup to the saucer with a distinguished CLANK, pressing his lips tightly together. “...May I ask you why exactly you can not?” He asks, setting the cup and saucer down to the coffee table and leaning forwards in his chair, crossing his right leg on the top of his left.

Feeling the tension slowly building, Rhemi clears her throat, awkwardly adjusting in her seat, careful not to disturb the snoozing badger in her lap. Before she answers him, she starts playing with a lock of her hair to calm her, feeling her cheeks burning under the pressure of his intense glare. “W-Well…. I meaaaaan…. Did you really expect me and Muriel to just… pick up our lives and move to a brand city that is foreign to us?” She asks, immediately holding her breath at the answer. “We’ve been here for most of our lives. We’d be so out of place.”

Martin chuckles a bit and shakes his head. “No……. No. No... Of course not.”

Rhemi relaxes her shoulders, relieved at his answer and she exhales the air she was holding in settling back into the couch.

“... I expect you to come back home with your Father.”

All the relief she felt just a second ago is completely ripped away. Did…. did he just…? She must have misheard him. “Wh-..... What…. was…. that?” She utters, trying not to trip over her words.

He inhales irritably, slicking back his plum and gray hair. “You are better than these people here, Mielia.” He says with his right palm open, gesturing to the palace then towards the window to the entire city. “Surely, you can see that...”

Is… Is he really saying this?? Or am I imagining it? “What are you—??.... Nnnno. No, I don’t see that, because I’m not better. These people are my closest friends—”

“—Rhemielia, my little Pigeon.” He interjects, interlacing his hands tightly together. “...I don’t believe you understand your worth.” Completely blown away from the absurdity spewing from his lips. Completely dumbfounded and speechless, she finds herself with her mouth gaped open idiotically and eyes wide as he just goes on and on. Casually he sits there enjoying his tea, talking as if the topic were about anything else. “...Back in Charlès, you’ll be a highly eligible woman. Why—With my high standing position, you could marry another noble. You can marry a Count, become a respected Countess, ruling a city alongside your husband yourself…. if you play your cards right that is.”

Still stunned silent, Rhemi just stares blankly while Martin pours himself some more tea, watching as he drops three sugar cubes into his cup with a splash of cream and starts to stir it all up with his teaspoon. “... Who knows? Perhaps you could even be a Duchess if you're lucky. You are rather…. well….. Let’s face it. Plain, compared to most women in the court. I’m afraid you get that from my side of the family. But far from being ugly. You’re still rather fair skin, attractive features, and at least have a sharp mind. A lot of nobel men these days find that a desirable in a wife—”

“—Père…” Rhemi finally manages to get out and she clasps her palms together, absolutely flabbergasted at this conversation and she speaks slowly. “... I am already getting married… I found someone I want to spend my life with… And that life is here, in Vesuvia. I was saying that I am not leaving.”

Slowly, her father blinks, running his fingers on his jawline still staring hard at his daughter. A flash of anger behind his gaze sends a shiver down her spine. But then snorted through his nose as if he was amused. “Hmm.... We’ll see about that…” He says coldly with a small bone chilling grin.

Almost scared to ask, Rhemi leans her head in, never breaking her eye contact and mutters. “Wha-?”

Suddenly, the tall older male servant wearing a darker colored uniform emerges from the corridor and he bows entering the room, unmeaningly cutting Rhemi off. “Excusez-moi, Monsieur Martin.”

“Oui, Bartholomew, what is it?”

“The Western Trading Consult will be arriving shortly.”

Martin pops out his pocket watch with a rather surprised look on his face. “Oh, it’s that time already?” He takes one more swig of his tea then stands to his feet, Bartholomew hastily fastening his master’s cape and he dons his gloves and grabs his cane. “Well, apologies, my Pigeon, but duty calls. Let’s continue this conversation later, shall we?”

He walks over to her and pats her head. Her nostrils flare, making her feeling a bit more irritated than she’s ever had been when he does that. “But….” She mutters under her breath.

“Come along, Bea.” He says firmly. His familiar takes a quick stretch before she climbs up his leg to his shoulders from Rhemi’s lap.

Rhemi’s shoulders slump down and she stumbles over her words, watching helplessly as Martin just walks out of the room. “Wai—Bu-but I-I—I…we’re not—” Finally she realizes the conversation is over and her father is gone, leaving only her and his servant in the room. “....Alright then.” She sits there feeling so flustered. This wasn’t how this went in her head.

What does he mean he expects her to come back ALONE with him? Does he not realize that she’s in love? Now that she thinks about it, anytime she talks about Muriel to her father, he’d change the subject, or shut it down as if he didn’t exist. There is no way that she can tell any of her friends about this conversation. Oh no. They’d go apeshit, especially Muriel…. He’ll be worried sick.

A twinge of a headache spawns yet again from her temples radiating down the back of her head. A slight ringing takes over her ears and she rubs her temples a little harder to attempt to soothe the pain, consoling her inner self. This is all just a big misunderstanding—Yeah! Just a misunderstanding, Rhemi. Don’t worry. Everything will work out in the end….. Everything is going to be fine. Just… fine.

“... Not everything works out like they do in fairy tales, Rhemi….” Her own voice whispers in her ear.

Rhemi stifles a shutter as her eyes fly open. She glances up, thinking she might have seen someone else in the room next to Bartholomew. But not a soul is there.

And the ringing in her ears is at its loudest…It’s nearly deafening. But then—

“Eh...Pardonnez-moi, madame?”

“Hmmm??” Finally, the world is back to normal, other than her slight headache. The deafening ringing ceases and she’s just alone with her father’s servant.

“I’m sorry, this might be out of line, but….” The servant bows politely, with a kind smile. “I am your father’s head butler.”

“Oh…. Oh! Y-yes, hello! It’s Bartholomew, right?” She stands to her feet and tilts her head to see his face and sticks out her hand with a giggle and he flutters his eyes slowly straightening back up staring at her open hand. “...No need to bow, I’m just a common magician, not a Lady of the court… not anymore at least.”

Shocked at her informalness, he is taken back a bit, but then smiles and takes her hand and they shake. “So you are the mysterious daughter.”

With a confused smile, Rhemi shakes her head and chuckles awkwardly. “I’m sorry?”

“Ohh, pardon me. You and your mother were slightly famous back in Charlès… The Archmagister who’s wife and daughter were spirited away from this realm.”

“Oh…” She mumbles and swallows hard. “... Well… I don’t really remember any of that.”

“Ah, I’ve heard you had severe memory loss. I’m… I’m sorry if I made you upset.”

“Oh! No no no! You’re fine!…. I’m just…. still absorbing all of this, ya know? It’s just new….”

“Well… I’m glad to see the Archmagister finally happy.”

Rhemi politely smiles despite her emotions currently. “You-…. Do you really think he’s happy?”

“I have worked for the man for a long time now, a few years after you were kidnapped. Please, don’t mention any of this to him, but… He always had such a… eeerrrrr…. how do I say…. melancholy?... to him. But since he has reunited with you… Well…. I haven’t seen him smile nearly as much.”

“Oh….”

Strange. The man had a funny way of showing it. She thinks to herself.

The servant could apparently tell Rhemi’s conflicted feelings behind her now averted gaze. He hesitates for a moment, opening and closing his mouth before finally freely speaking his mind. “Perhaps this isn’t my place, Rhemielia—”

Before she can stop herself, Rhemi interrupts. “It’s ahh—…. It’s Rhemi now…. a-.. actually….” Being called that name was starting to make her cringe for some odd reason and she couldn’t stand for another person to call her by Rhemielia today. But she tries to play it off with a rather convincing grin and a little chuckle.

It seems to have worked, the servants smiles back with an understanding nod. “Pardon, Rhemi….. But I know Monsieur Martin can be…. difficult at times, but… he really is happy to have found you. I think if anyone can get anything through to him, it is you…. And no one deserves to be alone.”

That's what I normally say.

Nodding to herself for a moment as his words set in. “.... Thanks, Bartholomew. I really appreciate it.” She finally replies.

This servant was quite different from what she had initially thought. He might appear rather snooty, but he was actually polite and had a kind wrinkly grin to match.

“Well, I best be on my way before I am missed. It was pleasant to finally have met you, Rhemiel—I mean, Rhemi.” Bartholomew says, and half bows out of habit.

“Likewise…” Rhemi says, holding out her hand again. This time, he immediately took it with both of his and gently shook it, then patted the top of her hand lightly. “I hope you enjoy your stay here.”

“Thank you. I believe I will.” Bartholomew walks backwards still facing Rhemi before he gracefully bows out of the room, then turns around heading towards where she could only conclude where her father is staying.

As soon as he exits the room, Rhemi is left all alone with her thoughts. With a defeated feeling sigh she plops back down to the couch, unable to slouch because of the constrictions of the uncomfortable corset. It felt way too small for her size and she felt her breasts were in her face.

How could her father expect her to come with him when her life is here in Vesuvia? How could he not recognize that she in fact was getting married to Muriel and was in love? He hasn’t even made an attempt to get to know him either! But is it true that he’s happier to have been reunited with her? What does he exactly want from her anyways?

Worst of all, Rhemi thinks about that voice she heard whispering in her ear. It was her own voice. But, they weren’t her own thoughts. It was like they came from another invisible person that was next to her. Like a ghost. But there isn’t anyone else here but herself. But there was that unmistakable smell of ash and dirt...

What was that? Am…. Am I going mad? No one can know about this. If anyone found out about this… well. I didn’t even want to think about it.

Holding her head in her lap and rubbing her face, she sits there pondering hard. Perhaps, having dinner with Muriel and Asra would change things. Maybe then, her father will get to know them and then he’ll approve of her marriage. See how good of a person Muriel is.

“I can fix this.” She mumbles determined to herself, clasping her hands together pressing them to her mouth. “I… I can fix this…. I… I have to.”

✨To be continued...

I am so sorry that this took so long my trash pandas!! But I hope nearly 40 pages will make up for the month hiatus. Sorry, no CG this time, but thanks for all your love and support. As always,

Thanks for reading my hot garbage! <3

#the arcana #the visitor #madllamamomma #the arcana game #muriel #muriel the hermit #Muriel smut #muriel x apprentice #muriel x mc #fan apprentice #my hot trash #my hot garbage #for my hungry trash pandas #thanks for the patients #part 5~ #chapter 5~ #finally #sorry #18+ #smut #the arcana smut #smutty smut #fluff #angst #the real shit about to start #Rhemi the apprentice #Muriel x Rhemi #fanfic #arcana #muriel the mountain man

[gamergirl929]

My Favorite Girls (Becky Lynch x Reader)

@little-smurf Request:  Can I please request a Becky Lynch/reader where the reader is John cenas best friend and stone colds daughter but she has a little girl?

“BEEEEEE! BEEEEEE!”  

Becky grins at the familiar squeak, opening her arms so your 2-year-old little girl can jump into her arms.  

“Ders my favorite girl.” Becky smiles, kissing Ava’s cheek, the little Y/E/C orbed girl giggling. 

“Where’s yer mama?” She asks, Ava pointing a tiny finger down the hall.  

“Ava Marie?!” You call out, smiling when you round the corner and see her in Becky’s arms.  

“I should’ve known.” You grin as Ava rambles, the little girl saying words neither of you can understand.  

“She always knows where I’m at before I do.” Becky grins, smiling as Ava plays with a strand of her red hair.  

You watch with a grin, your heart swelling in your chest as Becky playfully peppers Ava’s cheek with kisses.  

“Beeeeeeee!” She wiggles in her hold, the Irishwoman grinning as she turns your way.  

“So ow’s yer dad?” She asks and you snort.  

“I forgot the last time you saw him was when the two of you got drunk in the ring.” You shake your head as Ava snuggles into Becky’s chest.  

“I wasn’t drunk...” Becky scoffs remembers as she and Stone Cold marched around the ring, beers in hand.

Your brows arch as your eyes narrow, locking with Becky’s.  

“Fine. Maybe a little.”  

You grin.  

“He’s alright, just working on his ranch, as usual.” You smile as you tuck a strand of hair behind Ava’s tiny ear, the little girl’s eyelids fluttering.

“Someone had a long day.” Becky smiles, but when she tries to pass her back to you, Ava whines, stiffening in Becky’s hold.  

You shake your head, grinning.  

“Looks like you’re coming with us again.” You shrug, the woman snorting as she looks down at Ava, the little girl’s Y/E/C orbs locking with her brown orbs.  

“Let’s go cuddle bug.”  

You glance over your shoulder at the two, the butterflies in your stomach flapping their wings in elation.  

Being with Becky Lynch made your heart soar, you wanted nothing more than to be with her in a way that was MORE than friendship, but wanting something and seeking it were two different things entirely.  

You jump at the feel of Becky’s hand on your back, the woman’s brows knitted in confusion.  

“Ya alright?” She asks and you nod, a smile stretching across your face as your eyes dart from Ava, to Becky and back.  

“Yeah, more than alright.”  

Becky nods, eyes on your back as you turn around and make your way down the hallway.  

The former Raw Women’s Champion sighs.  

“I’m opelessly in love wit yer mother.” She whispers, unaware that Ava Marie is far from asleep.  

                                                         ***

Ava Marie had made it a habit of refusing to let Becky go, the woman ultimately ending up in your hotel room with the two of you.  

It wasn’t ideal, but you didn’t want Ava anywhere else than by your side.  

“ONNNNNNN!”  

You jump, pulled out of your trance by Ava’s squeal, the little girl sprinting towards your best friend, the one and only John Cena.  

“Look who it is!” John throws Ava into the air, the little girl giggling as she hugs him tightly.  

You grin, following suit, throwing your arms around the man who gives both you and Ava a big squeeze.  

“How are my two favorite girls?” Your best friend grins, Ava again rambling as John nods along, a grin on his face.  

“Your favorite?” You ask, the man nodding.  

“Of course! I mean we ARE best friends!” He yells and you nod, shaking your head at his antics.  

“Well, look who it is.”  

The three of you turn towards Becky, the little girl in John’s arms squealing at the sight of her ‘Bee.’  

“Look who it is, the GOAT, THE MAN, BECKY LYNCHHHHHHHHHHH!” John says dramatically, Ava giggling as she wiggles in his hold.  

“BEEEEEE!”  

John gasps, hugging Ava closer.  

“I thought you were Uncle John’s!?” He scoffs, the little girl burying her nose in the crook of his neck.  

“Unc On...” She snuggles into his hold, her eyes fluttering shut before she wiggles in his hold. “AND BEEEEE!”  

Becky shakes her head, slipping an arm around your middle, a grin stretching across as you lean your head on her shoulder.  

The butterflies in her stomach again fluttering their wings.  

“Looks like we’re in competition AGAIN, Man.” John smirks, Becky’s brows arching.  

“Oh, I’m always ready fer a challenge Cena.”  

“Bring it on.”  

You slap your hand to your forehead, playfully glaring at your daughter.  

“See what you did?” You ask, and she giggles.  

“Westle!” She claps her hands, the two smirking as John hands you Ava, moments later Becky has him in a choke hold on the backstage floor.  

“Tap!” She yells, John eventually getting her in a hold of his own.  

You turn to Ava, the little girl watching the two fight, playfully of course.  

“STOP!” She yells, the two ceasing their playful fighting in favor of jumping to their feet.  

“Wats wrong love?” Becky asks, the little girl opening her arms as wide as she can.  

“Wuve Bee and Unc On.”  

The two smile as they wrap their arms around both you and your daughter.

“I’m still her favorite.” John whispers, Becky letting out a snort.  

“You wish Cena.”

                                                         ***

“Mommy!” Ava pouts, as she gives your sleeping form a shake, your eyes widening.  

“What’s wrong honey?” You rasp tiredly, wiping at your eyes, frowning when you see tears in her eyes.  

“Miss Beeeeee....” She sniffles, snuggling into your chest and you smile, holding her close.  

“Want me to get Bee?” You ask and she nods, bottom lip trembling.  

You take a deep breath, searching for your phone.  

It rings only once before Becky answers, the woman’s voice raspy with sleep.  

“Are ya alright?” She asks, yawning and you smile.  

“Someone misses you...”  

“Beeeeee!” Ava cries and Becky sits up abruptly.  

“I’ll be der in a minute.”  

                                                         ***

Becky is there in less than 5 minutes, the woman slipping into your bed in less than 6.  

Ava snuggles up between the two of you, a tiny smile on her face as you and Becky wrap your arms around her, Becky’s hand resting on your forearm as hers rests on yours.  

You lean over Ava, her head just below your chin, and Becky’s as she follows suit, the sleepy Irishwoman smiling.  

“Thanks for coming.” You whisper and Becky nods, yawning.  

“Anything fer my girls.” She whispers, your eyes widening as your cheeks flush bright red.  

Before you can speak, you realize Becky is fast asleep.  

You bite your bottom lip, grinning.  

“Night Becky...” You whisper, closing your eyes, soon following Ava and Becky into a deep sleep.  

                                                         ***

You wake the following morning with a hum, your face scrunching up as you groan tiredly.  

“Mornin’ sunshine.”  

Your eyes flash open, a smile stretching across your face as your eyes lock with Becky’s equally sleepy brown orbs.  

“Beckyyyyy, noooooo.” You groan, wiggling closer, your hand resting on her hip. 

“It’s 10, Y/N.” She laughs, earning only another groan.  

“Too early.”  

“Nooooo...”  

Becky glances down at Ava, the little girl grumbling as she snuggles closer to you.  

“Like mother like daughter.” She grins, ducking down to press a kiss to the top of Ava’s head.  

Becky’s brown orbs dart around your face, the woman grinning as your nose crinkles.  

“I can feel you staring.” You whisper, Becky’s eyes widening as your eyes flutter open and lock with hers.  

Becky smiles, her tongue swiping at her lips as she cups your cheek, brushing a strand of hair out of your face.  

“I can’t help it.” She whispers, shrugging, her brown orbs darting from your lips to your eyes.  

Your heart skips a beat in your chest as you cover her hand with yours, leaning towards her, over Ava.

“What’s on your mind?” You whisper, the Irishwoman’s cheeks flushing pink as she stares intently at your lips.  

“I-

You turn your head, kissing her palm and Becky bites her lip, trying to stave off a massive grin.  

“I want ta kiss ya...” She confesses, your eyes widening at her confession, your heart swelling beyond capacity as the butterflies in your stomach flap their wings with excitement.  

You grin against her palm, turning back towards her, eyes full of nothing but adoration.  

“I want you to kiss me.” You whisper, the red-haired woman’s eyes widen.  

Slowly the two of you gravitate towards one another, the two of you leaning in, mere inches separating your lips.  

The two of you grin as you close the gap between the two of you, your lips meeting in a long overdue, and loving kiss.  

Becky’s lips move against yours, a feeling you’re immediately addicted to.  

Her lips taste entirely as you’d imagined, a welcoming warmth that you’d always see reflected in her soft brown orbs.  

The two of you part, eyes fluttering open at roughly the same time.  

Becky leans in, pressing another quick kiss to your lips before holding both you and Ava tightly, the two of you unable to stop smiling.  

Becky smiles lovingly down at Ava, kissing the top of her head.  

“I love my girls...” She whispers, her eyes widening when she realizes just what she said, her heart in her throat,  

“I-I mean-

You cut her off with another kiss, lightly bumping your nose against hers.  

“We love you too.”  

Becky beams, nuzzling into Ava’s hair, her forehead resting against yours.  

She grins.  

“Does dis mean I get ta get drunk wit yer dad more often?”  

You scoff.  

“No, go back to sleep.”  

#wwe #wwe imagine #becky lynch #becky lynch x reader #becky lynch imagine

[agentaace]

artemis fowl liveblog, if anyones interested (disclaimers: i was a HUGE fan of the books when i was younger but i barely remember anything, and i am pretty high right now)

its gonna be long folks! like..... really long

okay. news reporters. is that.... the digging guy??

YEAH ITS MULCH!! is he.... the narrator??? why is he the narrator???

who is this surfing child. the artemis i know has never stepped foot outside. i dont think he ever went to school either "an unusual kid" NOT UNUSUAL ENOUGH.... this kid looks to much like a cinnamon roll..... WHY IS HIS MOM DEAD

a hoverboard? a fucking hoverboard???

humans shouldnt know about the faeries

this bitch wearing jeans? also the dad looks like david from schitts creek but older

i should mention that the first time i heard this movie was approaching i looked up who was cast for Holly Short, bc i DISTINCTLY remember her explicetly canonically having brown skin bc i used to draw her!!! also butler's name wasnt revealed until like the third book and it was a BIG DEAL, youre just gonna drop it just like that?

whys artemis dressed like edmund pevensie...... fucking knock off version. edmund had more evil in his body than this wannabe supervillain and edmund was a GOOD BOY

hate this version of butler. hes too nice. hes helpful and kind. why has disney spat in my face

OH SHIT FAIRYWORLD LOOKS DOPE AF, somehow almost exactly like inused to picture it!! one good detail!! and if holly wasnt whitewashed she'd be kinda cute,,,,

this is not a compliment to the movie at all but i still absolutely love the faeries being super sci fi and tech oriented, thats incredible.... scifi fantasy DREAM HYBRID

oh god last time i saw judy dench was in the cats movie,,, she stared into my soul,,,, i cannot forget. though yeah she is a good commander root actually from what little i remember, the vibes are right

pleasebejuliapleasebejulia.... oh its juliet but SHE IS HERE!!!!!!!!!! h his twelve year old neice??? no??? she is his like 17 year old sister

oh my god foaly..... ok he looks cool as hell actually.... too bad his legs are animated weird!!! i would die for him

the l.e.p.recon suit and the wings actually look pretty close to whay i pictured too.... and the troll scene!!! holy shit i remember this!!! and thats how artemis finds her..... yess.... god those books were good.... time-freeze bubble foreshadowing omg i REMEMBER THAT and artemis figures out a way to avoid it..... holy shit im having so many flashbacks

OPAL KOBOI OH MY GOD wasnt she not until the third book??? and the dad and the aculos stuff too???? why are they mixing them up like this

okay kidnapping scene and where holly and artemis meet is sorta exactly what i remember, like i feel like its almost line for line tbh

pacing is wack, i feel like the time freeze was much later in the book and holly was captive for like, a majority.... also, now that artemis is playing villain to holly it feels a lot more natural, he is SUPPOSED to be snarky and rude and mean

"top o' the morning" very funny judy dench line, but i dont think its funny for the reasons disney intended

ARTEMIS IN A SUIT, FINALLY!!! also, Take The Shot! lmao. and see... this little good artemis doesnt make sense to have this extremely thorough and detailed and villainous plan, why couldnt disney just make him evil

HEY I REMEMBER THE GOBLIN FIRE THING IN PRISON W MULCH ACTUALLY..... NICE

"youre enjoying all this, you think it's a game!" YES! wht couldnt disney just lean into this and commit!!! i just wish this child looked like more of a bastard!!

hehehe david bowie is a faerie (though i'm.... not really liking josh gad's comedic relief role here.... thats nothing new) FUCK ME I FORGOT ABOUT THE JAW THING I AM TOO HIGH FOR THAT SHIT THIS IS HORRIFYING

iris cam!!! vividly remember that!!! and the finger gun thing, did they use that too?? loved that, will be disapointed if its not here

eeeughfjhf i forgot about the dwarf beard hair thing too oh GOD

the aculos looks good according to my awful memory!!! nice

the cudgeon storyline was NOT in the first book, not that i can remember, amd its not even interesting?? it just clutters up this movie with some nonsense. i dont like it.

that troll fucking YEETED butler eeeeeigufjkd the jaw thing again noooooo

like okay i like that artemis looks Baby, i like that he looks 12, i just wanted a shittier twelve year old. this ones too nice!! toss him out!!!

this butler is also too cute. i needed him to be way intimidating. but this one is wholesome. fuck this

and the relationship between holly and artemis. its too good, too pure. they are so cute. in the books they were friends completely against their will.

yeah i am totally mad that they are combining the first book and the third (?) book. not everything has to be some End Of The World shit. sometimes a kid just ransoms a fairy because he wants gold and he's evil. this disney version is much more boring. like if this movie had leaned into the wholesome stuff while keeping a lower stakes plot, thatd be okay. if artemis was super evil and cool as fuck and they made the stakes a little higher.... that might have been okay? but Good People Fighting The End Of The World is every movie and it is very boring!!!!! oh my god!!!!

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?!? THE DAD'S NOT EVEN EVIL???? NOOOOO

holly and commander root were not close. seriously cut the wholesome shit. these were the LEAST wholesome books i read as a child. the faeries have swear words and they arent afraid to use them.

ugh the weird "we're probably not going to get a sequel but we're going to imply one anyways" thing that bad book adaptations do.... like miss peregrine's, remember that?

"i'm artemis fowl. i'm a criminal mastermind." FUCK YEAH YOU ARE GO OFF KING actually a little hyped over that line. maybe twelve is too young to be fully evil. he still has time to become Bastard.

fuck the mulch narrator bullshit. hate that. "i hope you don't get squeamish" I DO PLEASE DO NOT DO WHAT YOU ARE DOING shut the fuck up. all of you shut the fuck up you are so ANNOYING

okay its over and i am free

#artemis fowl #artemis fowl 2020 #liveblog #artemis fowl movie #funny #mine #ummmm ive only ever done liveblogs of magnus archives before #and thats on my sideblog #but i like it! might do it more especially if people like it

[thisisthedungeonthatneverends]

Am I the Only One (Alt: Everyone else has had more sex than me)

Ships: libnyx, regclar, gladnis, promptis

Rating: M

Words: 2908

In which Nyx Ulric seems cursed to walk in on EVERYONE having sex and wonders if he is the only one in all of Insomnia NOT getting laid today. Check the reblogs for the AO3 link.

It was as if His Majesty had declared an official Everybody Gets Laid Day but no one told Nyx Ulric. He just came in to drop off the latest reports from the warfront with the King. That’s it. That’s all Nyx had to do today and the rest would be spent drinking beer and watching the professional chocobo racing semi-finals. Simple day. When he knocked on the door to King Regis’ office, however, his day turned from simple to weird in 2.53 seconds. “Bullocks, I forgot Nyx was coming! Quickly Clarus…” “Regis, I was almost coming…” Nyx raised a suspicious eyebrow and wondered if he should knock again. When he heard a muffled umf from the other side he decided against it. Were they…noooooo, they couldn’t be…could they? “One moment, please!” Regis called out, a hint of mild distress in his voice. Nyx cleared his throat. “In your own time, Your Majesty.” He heard some shuffling and the distinct sound of a chair being dragged across the hard wood floor then someone, presumably Regis, loudly clearing their throat. “You may enter.” Nyx shook his head, trying to rid himself of the thoughts of were His Majesty and Clarus Amicitia really just… He pushed open the heavy doors and approached the desk where the King sat looking as pristine and regal as ever. Nyx bowed and placed the thick folder containing the reports requested of him on the desk. “Here are the reports from the warfront as requested, Your Majesty. Our forces are holding the newest influx of Imperial warships at bay for the time being. They aren’t gaining any ground, but neither are we. Captain Drautos is requesting reinforcements.” Before Regis could respond, a faint scuffing sound came from under the large desk. Nyx could not help but look down and when he did his eyes widened at the sight of the toe of a boot juuuuust peaking out. Regis seemed frozen in place. “I’lllookitoverthankyouNyx,” Regis prattled his words together. “Thatisallyouaredismissed.” It took every ounce of concentration Nyx had to look up from the boot he knew did not belong to Regis and every ounce of balance to bow without falling on his face. “Y-yes Your Majesty…um…good day.” He turned on his heals and literally power walked to the door. Nyx had retreated from the bloodiest of battles with less urgency than that of which he swung open the doors of the Kings office and ran like his life depended on it. And after interrupting Regis and Clarus now undoubtedly having sex, he wasn’t sure his life DIDN’T depend on it.

……………………………………..

Once he was a safe distance away from that office he stopped to catch his breath. Not that he couldn’t run faster and farther than any other Glaive save for possibly the captain, but what he was running from had knocked the wind clean out of him. He needed to wash his face and take a leak. Yes, he thought, that would help. He could then go home and watch the races and never have to think of the King and the Shield… Nope. Not thinking about it. By the time he reached the nearest restroom, the initial shock had mostly worn off. Good for them, he thought. Two old widowers finding love again…kinda romantic if he thought about it that way. Nyx wished for a passing moment if he would ever find love. His last girlfriend had been a clingy, nagging bitch and the boyfriend before her cheated and blamed HIM for “never being dtf.” No one would ever understand his life of service to the crown, he thought. Nyx was relieved to find the bathroom empty. Not many were in this wing of the citadel at this time of day, so he could at least relieve himself in peace. So he whistled an idle tune as he did so, and almost sprayed the damn ceiling when he was startle by a loud BANG! Someone, or rather two someones, arms tangled around each other and seemingly attached at the face, had just burst through the bathroom door. Was that…noooo…Astrals, that WAS him. First Clarus and now GLADIOLUS Amicitia! The other man, shorter with a much slighter build, dark blonde hair, and glasses was���what was his name? The Prince’s adviser he knew for sure. Something flamey, right? Nyx wasn’t sure how long he had been standing there at the urinal dick in hand staring at the young couple, or how long the couple had been staring back at him before he realized crap, I should probably put my dick away now. “Don’t mind me,” Nyx said before his brain could stop his mouth. “Just…peeing. Done now.” He zipped himself up and tiptoes around the couple who just stood frozen like a centuries old erotic statue that made schoolboys giggle in order to get to the sink to wash his hands for not as long as health code dictates. Once again, Nyx rushed out of a room so two people who were apparently trying to fuck could have their privacy. He wiped his wet hands on his coat and laughed. “Damn, did I miss a “National Fuck Day” memo or something? At least all the love in the air wasn’t making the front of his pants get tight. No, not in the least.

……………………………………..

After accidentally witnessing two “encounters” in the span of five minutes, Nyx needed fresh air. A nice walk in the gardens should clear his fuddled head, right? Right. Once again the shock wore off as he strolled through one of the citadel’s many gardens and he found himself happy for Gladiolus and…DAMN what was his name? Two people who served the crown, who understood how important duty was to each other, were able to find time to share an intimate moment. Now Nyx was jealous. Why couldn’t he have that? He whistled as he strolled along and - IGNACIO! That was the advisers name. Now Nyx could stop kicking himself for being a dumbass. At any rate he whistled and strolled along peacefully until he was just about ready to head home, shower, jerk off, throw on some sweatpants, and settle down with pizza, beer and the tv remote. That was until he heard a faint sound – specifically a faint moan – from behind one of the hedges. Not again, he thought. As he continued walking trying and failing to ignore the erotic sounds, they grew louder and Nyx realized with a sinking feeling he was getting closer to rather than farther from the action. “Mm yes Prompto…” “Fuck, Noct, you feel so good…” Nyx. Froze. Right. There. Noct? Noctis? As in PRINCE Noctis? Nyx had to know. Curse his life dammit he HAD to know! He marched to the hedge the sound was coming from, swung back the branch…and immediately regretted every life decision that had lead him to this time and place. On the ground on his knees was a young blond haired blue eyed man who Nyx vaguely recognized from a few photos who was currently BALLS DEEP in the PRINCE who lay on his back with his legs pushed up against his chest. Upon seeing Nyx, both men screamed. As did Nyx. When the screaming had subsided, Nyx just stood there with jaw on the ground while Noctis and…he called him Pom-something-or-other, Nyx neither knew nor cared, scrambled around on the ground search for their cloths. “Nyx, what the hell!!!” Noctis shouted as he stood and shimmied into his pants. “First you’re gonna cock block me and now you’re just gonna stand there like an ass?!” Nyx blinked rapidly. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry it’s just…FUCK!” He threw up his hands and stepped back. “First the fathers, then both sons, Shiva’s TITS how is this my LIFE!?” And for the third time that afternoon, Nyx got the hell out of there.

…………………………….

Finally, FINALLY Nyx was home. After a shower and some relief by his own hand he slipped into an old pair of sweatpants and a tshirt, ordered pizza and headed to the fridge. It was beer o’clock for Nyx, and it hadn’t come soon enough. He opened the door and reached for the shelf that was usually designated for alcohol… to find only one beer remaining. Well Hell. He wasn’t going back out lest he interrupt another session of dicking, so he sighed and accepted that one beer would have to do. He settled down on the couch and turned on the tv. The races were just about to start and Nyx smiled. Just in time. But as he watched the races, his mind drifted back to Noctis and his blond lover Pom-something. They started out friends and grew into lovers, Nyx mused. Damn. Everyone seemed to be finding love, or at least ass, except him. He knew Cor Leonis, the Crownsguard martial, was seeing someone, as was fellow Glaive Crowe Altus. He didn’t know of anyone else off hand, but the captain was always gallivanting off somewhere. Maybe he was with someone too? Nyx shrugged and downed the last swig of beer. Soon he heard his doorbell ring. Damn, he’d just gotten comfortable, too. Today was simply not the right day to by Nyx Ulric. He begrudgingly stood and went to answer the door, expecting pizza. What he saw when he answered the door was actually better: his lifelong friend Libertus, carrying a case of their favorite brew. Nyx smiled. “I love you.” Libertus laughed and entered through the open doorway. “Bit dramatic tonight, aren’t we? Have a rough day doing the captains job or what?” “Yeah, or what,” Nyx sort-of answered. “Man you wouldn’t believe the things I’ve seen today.” “Tell me about it!” Libertus said, setting the case of beer on the coffee table. “I saw something I’ll be prayin’ to Ifrit for the next hundred years to burn out of my mind.” Nys took his place in his recliner after grabbing a beer for himself, while Libertus sprawled out on the couch with his own. “Oh yeah?” Libertus nodded. “Crowe. Like a little sis to me, right? Well I went to the gym today to get my phone charger, and I had to walk in on her…” Libertus washed down a look of disgust with a long drink from his can. “I walked in the locker room and there she was on the bench gettin’ fucked by, you ain’t gonna believe this shit, COR LEONIS!!! Nyx actually laughed in spite of himself. “Man, I wish I could say I was surprised, but I learned something fun about our King today.” Libertus, wide eyed, slammed his beer on the table. “Fuck off!” “His Majesty and his Shield, Clarus Amicitia. I went to drop off those reports like Drautos was supposed to have done yesterday, right?” Well I heard’em fumbling around in there and when the King finally let me in Clarus was hiding under the desk. UNDER the DESK, can you believe that shit?” Libertus slowly shook his head. “I need another beer. Okay, okay,” he reached for one more can from the case, “I got another one for ya. Crowe and Cor aren’t the only Glaive-Guard match-up going on. When I went out to the parking lot I saw Luche and Monica steaming up the windows of Luche’s car.” “Now THAT I’m surprised at. I though Luche was was on a strict sausage diet!” Libertus laughed. “Apparently not. Unless there’s something Monica ain’t tellin’ us about then-” Libertus was interrupted by the doorbell. “That’d be pizza!” Nyx excitedly declared. “Lemme get this and I’ll tell you who ELSE I caught together today.” “DAMN! Was today some kinda sex holiday that I forgot about?” “I know right!” Pizza way paid for and divvied out, and the chocobo races were long forgotten in the midst of two grown men gossiping like schoolgirls. “So,” Nyx mumbled around a mouth full of pepperoni and cheese, “I was in the bathroom at the citadel takin a leak. In stumble Gladiolus Amicitia and Ignacio, groping and stuck to each others faces.” Libertus made a strange face. “Gladiolus and who?” “The Prince’s adviser. You know him?” Libertus laughed so hard and long he made himself cough. “I know him but apparently you don’t. The name’s IGNIS you dingus!” Nyx rolled his eyes. “Whatever, I was close wasn’t I? Anyway, The adviser and shield to the Prince are together and speaking of the Prince, I caught HIM getting fucked six ways to Saturday by some blond guy in the palace gardens.” “Whathahell,Mn!” Libertus tried to say with his mouth full of stuffed crust. He swallowed and washed his fourth slice of pizza down with another swig of his third beer. “Is everybody gettin’ tail but us?” Nyx shrugged. “Apparently. I haven’t had anyone but Rosy Palm sense I dumped that bimbo Steph three months ago.” Libertus let out a low whistle. “You’re loooong overdue, Buddy. Then again it’s been almost two months for me.” For some reason it went silent after that. The races were half over and they had no idea who was on the leaderbord. They didn’t care though. It was nice to just be two buddies with pizza, booze, and each others company.

Libertus stretched and stood. “Not headin’ out already are you?” Nyx asked. “Hell no, you can’t get rid of me that easy.” He pointed his thumb towards the bathroom. “Gonna break the seal.” Nyx nodded and for some inexplicable reason watched his friend walk away. Did his hips always…sway like that? Hu. Nyx turned up the tv while Libertus was in the bathroom, intending to catch up on what he’d missed of the races in favor of gossip. His favorite racer was on the leaderbord, so he was happy. Libertus returned soon and sat on one side of the couch instead of sprawling out like he had before. Nyx yawned and stood. “My turn.” As he walked away he got the distinct feeling of being watched, but it wasn’t unpleasant. In fact he was sure he didn’t mind a bit if Libertus was staring at his ass. If Nyx was anyone but himself, he’d stare at his ass, too. He wasn’t too humble to admit he had a nice ass. So did Libertus, actually… funny, he’d never considered his best friend’s ass before but now that he did, it was a good thing his pants were as baggy as they were because hello… Man, he was one thirsty sunuvabitch. A commercial for some kind of candy was on when he returned and instead of going back to his recliner, Nyx sat on the couch next to Libertus. He sighed and rubbed his face with his hands. Libertus rested a reassuring hand On Nyx’s shoulder. “Guys like us got it rough, my friend. It’s hard to find someone who understands the sort of life we live and even when we do, who has time to actually do anything? Nyx laughed humorlessly. “Apparently five different couples judging by what we saw today. I don’t know how the ones you saw ended up together, but Regis and Clarus, they’ve both had broken hearts and patched each other up. Gladiolus and IGNIS, I got it right that time, they understand each other because they both run circles around the Prince, and then the Prince and the blonde kid started off as friends and now they’re apparently lovers.” Libertus nodded thoughtfully. “Where’s that for us?” Broken hearts. Service to the crown. Friends. Nyx eyed Libertus carefully to judge weather or not his friend was thinking the same thing as him. And was it just him or did Libertus’ hand seen to be slowly sliding down his back? He chanced a full look at Libertus now and…were they…yup, their faces were closer, much closer, no more than a couple inches apart. Nyx smiled. “I think I just found it.” Nyx never hesitated with anything, so he didn’t hesitate to close the distance between them and kiss the man who’d been his best friend sense before he could remember. Libertus, to Nyx’s relief, welcomed the kiss, returning is with more intensity than Nyx had imagined. He slipped the hand that had in fact been making its way down Nyx’s back under the back of Nyx’s shirt. It was bold, but then so was Libertus, and it made Nyx hum against Libertus’ mouth and deepen the kiss. Nyx hands found his new lover’s thigh, and Libertus shifted his hips, causing Nyx fingers to brush against a very impressive bulge. Eventually Nyx had to breath, and as munch as he hated to admit it, he couldn’t do that very well with someone else’s tongue down his throat. So he pulled away and opened his eyes to be met with a lustful gaze from Libertus. “You know,” Nyx said somewhat breathlessly, “You’ve had a bit to drink tonight.” Libertus chuckled. “You’re not taking advantage of me, if that’s what you’re worried about.” Nyx smirked. “No, it’s just that it might not be legal for you to drive. Wanna crash here tonight?” He made his true intentions known with a wink and a subtle roll of his hips. Libertus smiled that warm welcoming smile that Nyx had grown to love over the years, and hoped he would grow to love even more. He didn’t say a word, but he answered with a kiss.

#dungeon's writing #ffxv #fanfic #lemon #libnyx #nyx x libertus #libertus ostium #nyx ulric #clarus amicitia #regis lucis caelum #clarus x regis #regclar #gladiolus x ignis #ignis sciencia #gladiolus amiticia #promptis #prompto argentum #noctis lucis caelum #prompto x noctis #other minor characters #other minor ships

[verdigrisprowl]

Jan 21 Dancitron Movie Night - Gotham 17-19

An Insecticon showed up. That combined with the show meant Prowl had a Pretty Uncomfortable Time.

He stayed after long enough to fret over Starscream’s mental condition with Soundwave and, of all people, Smokescreen.

Today NoodlesAtNight 7:20 pm *Soundwave is swaying ever so gently from side to side while seated, quietly sipping from an energon cube every few. Everything is set up; everyone's welcome to get comfy.* Swervester 7:21 pm Heyo. NoodlesAtNight 7:21 pm *Lifts the cube at Swerve. Greetings.* thebestdecepticonleader 7:21 pm Hey SCProwl 7:22 pm Pleasant. NoodlesAtNight 7:22 pm =Ravage recommended this list.= SunstreakerCMO 7:22 pm -And he's come in place of Blaster tonight- NoodlesAtNight 7:22 pm *And a quick tip in the direction of Starscream and Sunstreaker before he has a sip again.* thebestdecepticonleader 7:22 pm There are a lot of Autobots in this stream, is it safe? SCProwl 7:23 pm Why wouldn't it be? NoodlesAtNight 7:23 pm [[This is a neutral zone, Starscream. Anyone who acts as though it is not will answer to him.]] Swervester 7:23 pm As safe as Smokey's streams, dude. thebestdecepticonleader 7:23 pm Autobots are dangerous... ah I see I won't do anything except in self defense then Today SunstreakerCMO 7:23 pm ...only as dangerous as we need to be. SCProwl 7:24 pm No more dangerous than any Decepticon. NoodlesAtNight 7:24 pm [[He would appreciate that. Neutrality does go in both directions.]] thebestdecepticonleader 7:24 pm Dangerous to Decepticons SCProwl 7:24 pm The most powerful person in this room is a neutral. *a nod to Soundwave* SpecsTheSpectralDragon 7:24 pm *here comes a dragon, with a cart full of treats and a mouth bandaged shut. she waves her wing and starts putting the treats away. she's wearing something unusual tonight- a little computer-monocle clipped to cover her right eye.* thebestdecepticonleader 7:24 pm Who's a neutral? SCProwl 7:25 pm Soundwave and myself. thebestdecepticonleader 7:25 pm *Fascinated* What's that like NoodlesAtNight 7:25 pm *Pleased by that compliment and hums softly. Oh, he IS in a good mood.* SCProwl 7:25 pm Like not fighting every day. thebestdecepticonleader 7:26 pm But what's that like? What do you spend your time on? NoodlesAtNight 7:26 pm [[...Dear dragon, what has happened to you?]] [[And we spend it on whatever we choose.]] SCProwl 7:26 pm *takes her usual seat at the table closest to the door* thebestdecepticonleader 7:26 pm You get to choose what to do? SCProwl 7:27 pm Yes. thebestdecepticonleader 7:27 pm You don't have people to tell you what to do? SunstreakerCMO 7:27 pm -just sitting off to the side- SpecsTheSpectralDragon 7:27 pm *the dragon just shakes her head and points at her mouth. can't talk, jaws are immobilized.* Swervester 7:27 pm That's kind of what being in charge of yourself means. thebestdecepticonleader 7:28 pm Wow. I have to try it someday. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 7:28 pm ((sorry for missing last stream- we just found out that the roof repair folks "fixed" the leak by patching the /other side of the roof/ and there was. badness.)) NoodlesAtNight 7:28 pm [[Well. He has a few people - but he selected who he would answer to, so it is different.]] *Nods.* [[And he would recommend it.]] ((oh noooooo)) SunstreakerCMO 7:28 pm ((holy shit)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 7:28 pm ((the good news is that we are NOT paying for any of the repairs)) thebestdecepticonleader 7:28 pm ((oh man)) SCProwl 7:28 pm //that's good! SpecsTheSpectralDragon 7:28 pm ((the bad news is that we now have a hole in the house)) NoodlesAtNight 7:28 pm (( a - are they gonna fix it proper now and b - do you want the wiki pages)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 7:29 pm ((they're paying for another company to fix it proper, since there's more damage than just the roof now. also, no, I grabbed the wiki pages in advance <3)) ((for starters, there is a /hole/ and not a small leak.)) thebestdecepticonleader 7:30 pm ((oh man, hope it's fixed soon)) SunstreakerCMO 7:30 pm -and bleated nod back to Soundwave, he almost forgot to greet the host for tonight- SpecsTheSpectralDragon 7:30 pm ((it will be. *ominous thunder*)) NoodlesAtNight 7:31 pm ((man. i hope y'all got that covered up with a tarp or someth. good it's gonna be fixed tho, whoo)) SunstreakerCMO 7:31 pm ((yaaay NoodlesAtNight 7:31 pm [[Injured yourself again? Or is there someone who needs a lesson taught?]] Today SpecsTheSpectralDragon 7:32 pm *holds up one finger, before wiggling the wings in a "sort of" gesture.* NoodlesAtNight 7:32 pm ((also i'll be starting at 8, so y'all got time to grab snacks and whatnots)) thebestdecepticonleader 7:32 pm Would you like a datapad for communicating? NoodlesAtNight 7:33 pm *Glances at Starscream and pings him a thank you for offering that to the dragon. How thoughtful.* thebestdecepticonleader 7:33 pm *holding out datapad from subspace* It's blank so you can have it SpecsTheSpectralDragon 7:34 pm *the dragon nods, and grabs it with her tiny dragon paws. she's fox-sized, so it may be a lil big for her, but it's a /lot/ better than charades. lessee, where's the text-to-speech option here...* thebestdecepticonleader 7:35 pm *Quickly points out the button for her* SpecsTheSpectralDragon 7:38 pm *thank you, starscream!* {{Misgrown tooth. Sometimes the replacement teeth get misaligned when growing. It happens.}} NoodlesAtNight 7:39 pm [[Ah. He has felt that pain before. Is there anything we can do for it while you are here?]] SpecsTheSpectralDragon 7:39 pm ((which is the most horrifying thing to imagine, btw. I don't know how sharks manage it. imagine a tooth trying to grow up into your eyes.)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 7:40 pm {{No, but thank you for offering. It's a routine surgery, I just have to keep the jaw stable while everything heals up.}} SunstreakerCMO 7:41 pm -okay, that sounds painful- NoodlesAtNight 7:41 pm *He bobs his head.* [[As you wish, then.]] SpecsTheSpectralDragon 7:41 pm *the dragon gives him her best salute! she appreciates Soundwave so much.* thebestdecepticonleader 7:41 pm Glad to hear that it's going to be okay opatoes 7:42 pm /Smokescreen's running in- he almost forgot about tonight! But he's here! With snacks!/ Evening, everyone! thebestdecepticonleader 7:42 pm Smokescreen! opatoes 7:42 pm Starry! thebestdecepticonleader 7:42 pm You're okay to trust opatoes 7:43 pm Me? ... Is everything okay, Starry? Did you remember anything, or? thebestdecepticonleader 7:43 pm *whispering* Can I trust them? SCProwl 7:43 pm Evening, Smokescreen. NoodlesAtNight 7:43 pm [[Welcome, Smokescreen. You've come prepared, he sees.]] thebestdecepticonleader 7:44 pm *whispering* Not much, I've remembered a bit about you and the streams but not much else opatoes 7:44 pm /Whispering back/ For the most part, yeah! Soundwave is weird, but- he might be able to help you out with the memory thing? He's got weird tentacles, though, so watch out for that. thebestdecepticonleader 7:44 pm Thanks opatoes 7:44 pm Happy 2013!! SunstreakerCMO 7:44 pm -has just quietly folded his legs under himself, resting his chin on his knee- opatoes 7:46 pm /Smokescreen's getting up to dance along to the music!/ SpecsTheSpectralDragon 7:46 pm *the dragon's kinda parked by the datapad, but it's all good. if she fits, she sits.* NoodlesAtNight 7:46 pm [[You do not come here often, Sunstreaker. Having a break from the usual?]] *Ah, dancing! He'll keep that recording.* SunstreakerCMO 7:47 pm ...yes. I needed time off before I burnt myself out. opatoes 7:47 pm /Looking over at Soundwave, and waving. He wouldn't mind having a dance partner!/ SCProwl 7:47 pm *gently tapping fingers on the opposite arm to the music* Is the Captain going to be joining us tonight? thebestdecepticonleader 7:47 pm Smokey... should I join you? I don't remember if I like it opatoes 7:48 pm You should give it a go! I could teach you the steps? ... I don't actually know if you know, come to think of it. NoodlesAtNight 7:48 pm *...You know what, he'll grant Smokescreen this thing. Just once. They can dance to the next one.* [[He does not know if the Captain is coming. He hopes so.]] thebestdecepticonleader 7:48 pm If the next song is good for dancing I will then NoodlesAtNight 7:48 pm [[...Ah - your feed. Here.]] SCProwl 7:48 pm Oh, yes, thank you. opatoes 7:49 pm /Well- in that case, he's got a couple dance partners! He's going to reach for Soundwave first, so Starscream can watch and decide!/ thebestdecepticonleader 7:49 pm *watches intently* SCProwl 7:49 pm This sounds more appropriate for a different kind of dancing than whatever you were attempting earlier, Smokescreen. NoodlesAtNight 7:50 pm *He'll be smooth as butter. Smokescreen won't have any problems from this side.* opatoes 7:51 pm Well, yeah! There's a lot of different ways to dance! /And Smokescreen is pretty good on his feet, and Soundwave shouldn't have any problems with him, either!/ SunstreakerCMO 7:51 pm -oh, this looks like dancing he knows- thebestdecepticonleader 7:51 pm It's beautiful SpecsTheSpectralDragon 7:51 pm *the dragon nods in agreement with Starscream* SunstreakerCMO 7:52 pm -hums an agreement as well- NoodlesAtNight 7:52 pm *He'll spin away from Smokescreen to let Starscream have a try.* verdigrisprowl 7:52 pm *arrives* opatoes 7:52 pm /Oh! That was pretty nice! Smokescreen's offering a servo to Starscream, ready to let him try!/ thebestdecepticonleader 7:53 pm *takes hand* opatoes 7:53 pm Soundwave, I'd definitely be up to dance with you again, sometime! NoodlesAtNight 7:53 pm [[So,]] *While passing Sunstreaker to get a small tray of snacks* [[Burnt out? Tired of your work?]] *And back to Smokescreen.* [[He will think about it.]] verdigrisprowl 7:53 pm *... disapproves of Soundwave's choice in dance partners; but he's not the one dancing, so he's got nothing to say about it.* thebestdecepticonleader 7:53 pm How do I do this? NoodlesAtNight 7:53 pm *Pings Prowl an affection/greeting combo. Welcome, welcome, dear Captain. He holds out a hand. Do you want a round of your own?* SunstreakerCMO 7:53 pm Mn? Just tired in general. SCProwl 7:54 pm *pings alternate hello* thebestdecepticonleader 7:54 pm Do I hold you like Soundwave was? opatoes 7:54 pm /Smokescreen's starting out with a simple, kinda bouncy dance with Starscream, resting one servo on Starscream's waist./ Just- try to step in time to the music with me! opatoes 7:54 pm Yeah! That would work. thebestdecepticonleader 7:54 pm Oh okay! *holds* *slowly getting the hang of it* opatoes 7:55 pm /He's picking up the pace a little more, since this is a bit faster than the last song!/ verdigrisprowl 7:55 pm *pings them both back.* thebestdecepticonleader 7:55 pm This is fun verdigrisprowl 7:55 pm *he glances at what smokescreen and starscream are doing, then gives soundwave a quiet headshake; he doesn't know this dance.* opatoes 7:56 pm It is! I'm glad you like it- is anything coming back for you? /Can Smokescreen dip Starscream? He wants to dip him./ NoodlesAtNight 7:56 pm *Nods and turns the held out hand into a beckoning motion. Join him, then?*

[[You and Blaster really must consider a proper vacation. If he can learn to take one, so can you both, Sunstreaker.]] SpecsTheSpectralDragon 7:56 pm *the dragon is tapping her paws- a full aerial dance would probably be inadvisable, but this song is nice and bouncy...* verdigrisprowl 7:56 pm *sits with* NoodlesAtNight 7:57 pm *Lean up. Hmmm. Good.* SunstreakerCMO 7:57 pm I will take a vacation when I retire. thebestdecepticonleader 7:57 pm *dips* Nothings coming back, but I'm okay with that for now I guess NoodlesAtNight 7:57 pm ((three minutes, grab whatever you need - we're starting after this one)) SunstreakerCMO 7:58 pm ...or I find someone who can replace me. opatoes 7:58 pm Fair enough! Like I said- it might not hurt to talk to Soundwave about it? I think he knows a thing or two about dealing with lost memories and stuff. /Smokescreen's going to spin Starscream about! This song's fun!/ thebestdecepticonleader 7:59 pm *spin, spin, spin* Smokey is a dancing queen! opatoes 7:59 pm I can dance, I can die- thebestdecepticonleader 7:59 pm No opatoes 7:59 pm ... wait, what is that second line? thebestdecepticonleader 7:59 pm No dying SunstreakerCMO 8:00 pm -softly hums along with the song- opatoes 8:00 pm /Spin, spin, swing!/ thebestdecepticonleader 8:00 pm *twirls Smokey* NoodlesAtNight 8:00 pm [[From experience? That is a long, long time to wait.]] *About the being replaced bit.* SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:00 pm *okay, /maybe/ the dragon will do the little criss-crossing dance from the Aristocats. maybe. just a little.* opatoes 8:00 pm I promise I probably won't die anytime soon! As long as I don't drink anything weird again, I'll be fiiiine- /Grinning with the twirling, before taking it slow with the tempo change./ verdigrisprowl 8:01 pm *mumbles* especially if your idea of a vacation is less than a year long. *nudge nudge* NoodlesAtNight 8:02 pm *Soundwave claps quietly for all the dancers.*

@P: [[He wouldn't know what to /do./ Better were someone there to show him.]] opatoes 8:02 pm /Slowly ending the dance, leading Starscream to the couch!/ How'd you like that, Starry? Fun? SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:02 pm *loafs back up. comfy dragon.* NoodlesAtNight 8:02 pm ((WARNINGS, GOTHAM S2 17-19 // Violence, blood, death. Poor depictions of mental illness, ableist language, mentioned consequences of ableism, psychiatric and medical abuse. Family abuse. Suggestive scenes, flashing lights. Animal death, cannibalism, brainwashing.)) SunstreakerCMO 8:02 pm -huffs- I /am/ training a few. NoodlesAtNight 8:02 pm ((I'll try to remember before the flashing lights but I'm a little unfocused tonight so no perfect promises)) thebestdecepticonleader 8:03 pm It was great *sits next to Smokey* opatoes 8:04 pm /Leaning against Starscream, relaxing./ You need help getting caught up with this show, Starry? thebestdecepticonleader 8:06 pm I guess... can probably figure most of it out though opatoes 8:06 pm That's true! It's not too hard to figure stuff out. NoodlesAtNight 8:07 pm [[...Do they, now?]] opatoes 8:08 pm I mean... That would make sense. Wouldn't you want to keep all calls recorded if you worked in some kinda detective place? NoodlesAtNight 8:08 pm [[Personally, he would keep all calls recorded no matter what. But he sees your point.]] opatoes 8:09 pm I probably should start recording more of my calls, come to think of it! NoodlesAtNight 8:09 pm [[He certainly won't advise against it.]] verdigrisprowl 8:09 pm You DO keep all calls recorded no matter what. NoodlesAtNight 8:09 pm [[Yes, that's what he meant.]] *Amused ping.* NoodlesAtNight 8:10 pm [[For Primus' sake, Jim human. You'll be mistaken for a criminal if you pick up that kn--there, you see.]] [[...Well. A criminal for a different reason.]] opatoes 8:10 pm He's... Really bad at this verdigrisprowl 8:11 pm Sock them out, pick up the knife only long enough to make them run, drop the knife, run the other way. Don't linger with the knife. NoodlesAtNight 8:11 pm [[Agreed.]] opatoes 8:12 pm This... isn't going to go well NoodlesAtNight 8:13 pm [[Ugh.]] thebestdecepticonleader 8:13 pm That's horrible thebestdecepticonleader 8:14 pm How could you treat a child that way? NoodlesAtNight 8:14 pm [[Greed.]] thebestdecepticonleader 8:14 pm Yeah, but that doesn't make it right SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:14 pm {{Some people are just awful.}} NoodlesAtNight 8:15 pm [[He never said it was.]] thebestdecepticonleader 8:15 pm If I saw someone treating their child that way I would probably try to stop it by any means necessary NoodlesAtNight 8:16 pm *Already fiddling with the audio.* [[Then that makes you a better mech than most.]] thebestdecepticonleader 8:16 pm Sounded like a pigeon to me opatoes 8:17 pm Is the voice Penguin... NoodlesAtNight 8:17 pm [[Oh, this will be enjoyable.]] MedicalMurdersaurus 8:17 pm ((what I miss 😮 )) Swervester 8:17 pm //tyhbb asking the guy who did it for help NoodlesAtNight 8:17 pm ((jim got the tape of the IA call, babs is semi-convincing strange she's okay now)) thebestdecepticonleader 8:17 pm Why would a pigeon and a penguin work together though? NoodlesAtNight 8:17 pm [[Birds of a feather.]] *Huff* MedicalMurdersaurus 8:17 pm *comes SCREECHING through the door, sliding to a stop, still QUITE smokey* Swervester 8:18 pm [snorts quietly] Ed's not going to do what he wants him to do. SCProwl 8:18 pm *flinches at the noise* opatoes 8:18 pm ... Did Ed do it Swervester 8:18 pm He's gonna destroy the tape, probably. NoodlesAtNight 8:18 pm [[Eugh - Swoop! Go finish smoking outside.]] opatoes 8:18 pm !! /Waving at Swoop!/ thebestdecepticonleader 8:18 pm Birds are quite a nuisance SunstreakerCMO 8:18 pm -jolts in surprise- MedicalMurdersaurus 8:18 pm *shakes himself from toe to tip* verdigrisprowl 8:18 pm If they've got a recording of a bird on the tape, it'll be easy to raise the pitch back to one that matches the bird's natural pitch, and that'll isolate the caller's voice. MedicalMurdersaurus 8:18 pm *leaves a nice ashy spot* : > NoodlesAtNight 8:19 pm *Facepalms.* thebestdecepticonleader 8:19 pm Only if they know what type of bird it is opatoes 8:19 pm ... Is he gonna end up poisoning them MedicalMurdersaurus 8:19 pm ((good god how old are these children)) verdigrisprowl 8:19 pm Birds have distinct calls, I'm told. NoodlesAtNight 8:19 pm [[Birds are not a nuisance.]] *He's been doing what Prowl said, but he's not familiar with many Earth bird calls, and it's slow work hunting down recordings online.* MedicalMurdersaurus 8:19 pm Bird? :V NoodlesAtNight 8:20 pm {{Bird here.}} *She blows a raspberry at Starscream.* thebestdecepticonleader 8:20 pm They get stuck in my engines when I am flying, the feathers are horrible to clean out MedicalMurdersaurus 8:20 pm *scrambles over to her* Hi! verdigrisprowl 8:20 pm ... He's either going to "accidentally" destroy the tape, or try to kill Jim. thebestdecepticonleader 8:20 pm I don't mean birds like you, I mean fleshie birds NoodlesAtNight 8:21 pm [[Oh yes, many calls. He records new ones when he goes flying. Still, there are many more that he has not heard himself...]] SCProwl 8:21 pm Given his previous actions, I'm leaning toward Edward trying to kill Jim. NoodlesAtNight 8:21 pm {{Hiiiiiiii.}} verdigrisprowl 8:21 pm Oh. Now it's going to be murder. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:21 pm {{Jim is probably the only cop that would try to catch a criminal amongst the force. The Riddling Human has to cover his tracks.}} MedicalMurdersaurus 8:21 pm *heard "killed lots of people" and is interested despite not having a clue waht's going on* verdigrisprowl 8:21 pm Oh, look, he has a point. NoodlesAtNight 8:21 pm [[He had better cover them quicker. He is getting nervous.]] Swervester 8:22 pm He suspects something is off? NoodlesAtNight 8:22 pm [[Ed is being unusually defensive of the murderer.]] MedicalMurdersaurus 8:22 pm This a fight movie, Bird? Blood guts? : > NoodlesAtNight 8:22 pm *OH. He's got it.* NoodlesAtNight 8:23 pm {{It little bit blood guts.}} SunstreakerCMO 8:23 pm .... verdigrisprowl 8:23 pm A clock. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:23 pm {{A clock?}} MedicalMurdersaurus 8:23 pm Cool : > SunstreakerCMO 8:23 pm Ah. Swervester 8:23 pm Oh. MedicalMurdersaurus 8:23 pm KAHA opatoes 8:23 pm W. How do you do that to a chair MedicalMurdersaurus 8:23 pm It ZAP! MedicalMurdersaurus 8:24 pm Like Bird : > SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:24 pm *OOF. Tazed. That's gotta hurt.* Swervester 8:24 pm This is why you tell someone where you're going. SunstreakerCMO 8:24 pm ..... SCProwl 8:24 pm Quite easily. verdigrisprowl 8:24 pm As I said. NoodlesAtNight 8:24 pm [[Run faster, Jim.]] thebestdecepticonleader 8:24 pm Hm, murdery NoodlesAtNight 8:24 pm [[...Well. Hobble faster.]] SunstreakerCMO 8:25 pm He did just get shot... verdigrisprowl 8:25 pm And that's why you double tap before moving the body. opatoes 8:26 pm It's a good skill! are they living in a skyrim dungeon thebestdecepticonleader 8:26 pm who is this poor guy? NoodlesAtNight 8:27 pm [[Honestly, double tapping should be a habit for anyone who intends to terminate someone. It's a matter of care and efficiency.]]

[[He wonders how difficult it is to do. Sewing, that is.]] [[...She KEPT it?]] opatoes 8:27 pm I know how to sew! Kinda! I could teach you if you want, Soundwave. Swervester 8:27 pm Oh no don't hurt the dog opatoes 8:27 pm Oh no thebestdecepticonleader 8:27 pm Poor doggy NoodlesAtNight 8:28 pm [[What kind of idiot KEEPS the poison?]] MedicalMurdersaurus 8:28 pm * glances over at the discussion of double taps and bobbles his head in agreement, even if he has no idea why we're talking about making real sure people are dead dead* verdigrisprowl 8:28 pm Shouldn't have poured it all out. Now you have no evidence. MedicalMurdersaurus 8:28 pm ((don't give the doge booze, even if it isn't poison....) opatoes 8:28 pm Uh. SunstreakerCMO 8:28 pm ....? SCProwl 8:29 pm Ah, they finally broke Strange's "fix". verdigrisprowl 8:29 pm *isn't convinced of it* ((look at bruce, he's getting so tall)) SunstreakerCMO 8:30 pm -hums again- SCProwl 8:30 pm ((he's ridiculously tall now verdigrisprowl 8:30 pm ((he's almost ready to enter fourth grade)) NoodlesAtNight 8:30 pm ((LMAO)) MedicalMurdersaurus 8:30 pm *finds an empty floor spot to sprawl his dino-self out all over the place* NoodlesAtNight 8:31 pm *Bird sprawls on top of him. Which... is basically just setting down in one place.* MedicalMurdersaurus 8:31 pm ((Drive off into the sunset, barb....)) NoodlesAtNight 8:31 pm ((i love his wannabe bloodspattered tie)) opatoes 8:32 pm Phfff NoodlesAtNight 8:32 pm {{Haaaa. Bird likes her.}} MedicalMurdersaurus 8:32 pm What You like? : > NoodlesAtNight 8:32 pm {{What her said.}} Swervester 8:32 pm [snorts] NoodlesAtNight 8:33 pm ((one day prowl is gonna need someone to fulfill this role and everyone's gonna look to laserbeak)) MedicalMurdersaurus 8:33 pm *stares at Bird until she remembers he isn't remotely paying attention* verdigrisprowl 8:33 pm ((LMAO)) NoodlesAtNight 8:33 pm *Bird stares back. ....... Pinches beak.* MedicalMurdersaurus 8:33 pm ((yeah but she might use the opportunity to do it for real)) MedicalMurdersaurus 8:34 pm *squeaks* verdigrisprowl 8:35 pm ((yknow, gotham, you COULD just have ed talk to himself like a normal person, instead of talking to himself like a fakey fake CrAaAaAzY mAn)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:35 pm ((inorite)) opatoes 8:35 pm ((honestly SCProwl 8:35 pm ((if only SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:36 pm ((by the power of our salt combined, we are... something)) thebestdecepticonleader 8:36 pm ((pretty bad NoodlesAtNight 8:36 pm ((tbh ed's role throughout the series is a constant run of good work and bad work alternating)) verdigrisprowl 8:36 pm ((the Riddler Anti-Defamation Squad)) SCProwl 8:36 pm ((i like to think ed is mostly acting like this because this is how he thinks he should act as a crazy murderer man verdigrisprowl 8:36 pm ((the RADS)) thebestdecepticonleader 8:37 pm death? Swervester 8:37 pm //sighs loudly at the 'no i've always been insane i just have to admit it to myself' when in reality it was more like a stupid fuck up he followed up by an unrealistic 'mental break' NoodlesAtNight 8:37 pm [[Nicely done.]] thebestdecepticonleader 8:37 pm wow I got it! NoodlesAtNight 8:37 pm ((a favorite moment coming up)) opatoes 8:37 pm ... PHfhffff SunstreakerCMO 8:37 pm Ah. opatoes 8:37 pm PFHGFGHF NoodlesAtNight 8:37 pm ((and there it is <3 )) MedicalMurdersaurus 8:37 pm *EXPLODES laughing* verdigrisprowl 8:37 pm Pffff! Dramatic escape. SCProwl 8:37 pm ((bwahahaha MedicalMurdersaurus 8:37 pm *always a fan of someone tripping* opatoes 8:37 pm That was. That was amazing NoodlesAtNight 8:37 pm [[Snow is awful. This is proof.]] MedicalMurdersaurus 8:38 pm ((if that is the dog....)) opatoes 8:38 pm That's true! SCProwl 8:38 pm ...oh. verdigrisprowl 8:38 pm ... It WAS broken. MedicalMurdersaurus 8:39 pm ((beautiful)) thebestdecepticonleader 8:39 pm ew NoodlesAtNight 8:39 pm *Huffing noisily* opatoes 8:39 pm Primus verdigrisprowl 8:39 pm *slowly relaxes* MedicalMurdersaurus 8:39 pm *has no idea why that scene happened but enjoyed the stabbing regardless* : > thebestdecepticonleader 8:39 pm I mean, she was a horrible step-mother but... Swervester 8:39 pm ....So that was. verdigrisprowl 8:40 pm *and continues relaxing* opatoes 8:40 pm Is he finally getting his yearly vacation verdigrisprowl 8:40 pm *slumps back into the chair.* opatoes 8:40 pm ... Does he even get dental NoodlesAtNight 8:40 pm @P: [[Relieved?]] verdigrisprowl 8:41 pm @S «Beyond words.» SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:41 pm {{I can't recommend not getting dental.}} NoodlesAtNight 8:41 pm {{Heh.}} NoodlesAtNight 8:42 pm @P: [[That is good.]] opatoes 8:43 pm He was out there for a day and then immediately runs away Swervester 8:43 pm Casn't he at LEAST explain that he has something he needs to do that she'll be in danger doing verdigrisprowl 8:43 pm Why does she automatically assume the worst. He told her up front this was a temporary learning experience for him. NoodlesAtNight 8:43 pm [[It was longer than a day.]]

[[And yes, he should explain. He does not yet know how to give information without giving all of it.]] verdigrisprowl 8:43 pm He's said that that learning experience is over. He didn't say he's never speaking to her again. NoodlesAtNight 8:44 pm {{Her dumb. That good warm skin coat.}} verdigrisprowl 8:44 pm Her very dumb. MedicalMurdersaurus 8:44 pm Me Swoop warm : > NoodlesAtNight 8:44 pm {{Swoop good warmer.}} *Pat pat* SCProwl 8:44 pm Perhaps she hoped he could be convinced to stay with her permanently? verdigrisprowl 8:45 pm ((she's in oklahoma)) ((poor woman)) MedicalMurdersaurus 8:45 pm ((PUNCH HER)) verdigrisprowl 8:45 pm Shut the door. NoodlesAtNight 8:45 pm [[Oh, leave him /alone/ already.]] MedicalMurdersaurus 8:45 pm *descends into a giggling mess at the complement and pat combo* NoodlesAtNight 8:45 pm [[Your life is better without him anyway.]] SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:45 pm {{Infatuations are foolish.}} thebestdecepticonleader 8:45 pm I don't know much about human ages, but they seem young to be having a permanent intimate relationship verdigrisprowl 8:46 pm Ugh. God, we're going to get another hamhanded love triangle, aren't w— Don't let her in! Make her stay outside! SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:46 pm {{Er, they cause foolish behavior. I should be better at explaining things in writing.}} opatoes 8:47 pm He should really get a restraining order, though. I mean. She did try to offline him. verdigrisprowl 8:47 pm Kick her out. opatoes 8:48 pm Don't bend the pizza! MedicalMurdersaurus 8:48 pm Bird. Me Swoop love you : > NoodlesAtNight 8:48 pm ((i gushed about this elsewhere but: i love that gotham is so dedicated to the unpinnable decade aesthetic they have flat modern monitors with early 90s program look)) MedicalMurdersaurus 8:49 pm ((they do a great job making this seem like it's happening in _all_ times)) verdigrisprowl 8:49 pm He's being a terrible detective. NoodlesAtNight 8:49 pm [[In fairness, he IS a youngling. And his role model is not the greatest.]] SCProwl 8:50 pm I don't like Barbara much better than anyone else here does, but I don't understand why humans can't come to some agreement that involve all three people instead of these ridiculous love triangles involving everyone picking only one partner. Swervester 8:50 pm //i like that jim has a flipphone tbh NoodlesAtNight 8:50 pm ((flip phones and rotaries as far as the eye can see)) {{Oooooo. That nice drawer.}} MedicalMurdersaurus 8:50 pm Whammy drawer : > opatoes 8:50 pm The whammy drawer? ... Why does he have all this verdigrisprowl 8:51 pm That drives me crazy. Monogamy is an awful system. MedicalMurdersaurus 8:51 pm Mace pretty fun SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:51 pm {{I think humans falling in and out of love have something to do with it. They don't pair or multibond and stay bonded for life.}} MedicalMurdersaurus 8:51 pm *is DELIGHTED with the whammy drawer's use* verdigrisprowl 8:51 pm Oh. Wow. He's even more violent now. SunstreakerCMO 8:51 pm ....... NoodlesAtNight 8:51 pm [[And yet they seem determined to try.]] MedicalMurdersaurus 8:51 pm *couldn't smile wider if he tried, this is great* verdigrisprowl 8:51 pm ((the club is called The Artemis.)) ((she's a lesbian now. no takebacks.)) Swervester 8:51 pm Wow once he had no badge to listen to he went real violent NoodlesAtNight 8:52 pm ((no takebacks required. you're pretty much on the nose.)) verdigrisprowl 8:52 pm ((IS IT A LESBIAN BAR)) NoodlesAtNight 8:52 pm (( 😃 )) verdigrisprowl 8:52 pm ((YEEEEEEAH)) MedicalMurdersaurus 8:52 pm Soundwave, fastforward to more punching! SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:53 pm {{If they intend to keep trying at something they're clearly bad at, that's probably a failing on their part.}} ((OOOOH, KILLER CROC)) ((the bae in the bay)) NoodlesAtNight 8:53 pm ((also: if it will help ease any ooc irritations with jim's violence, a tidbit i recently learned -- they had actually planned to have jim slide down into being a villain (not unprecedented!) but got told no around the time they were almost done setting up for it)) verdigrisprowl 8:53 pm ((that explains a lot)) Swervester 8:53 pm //lmao MedicalMurdersaurus 8:53 pm ((look at this wonderful baby bat)) SCProwl 8:53 pm I know nothing about humans aside from what I've seen in these documentaries, but they seem perfectly capable of loving multiple people. Or the whole needing to chose between two perfect acceptable beings wouldn't be such a running thing. NoodlesAtNight 8:53 pm [[He's using that excuse. Technical skills being morally neutral.]] Swervester 8:54 pm //i'm mostly amused they waited until they'd finished setting up his villian origin to tell them no NoodlesAtNight 8:55 pm ((it wasn't the first time and it won't be the last)) verdigrisprowl 8:55 pm I tried to learn lockpicking. NoodlesAtNight 8:55 pm [[...Correct him if he is wrong, but that is a nonstandard hand for humans.]]

[[...How did learning it go?]] MedicalMurdersaurus 8:55 pm *flexes his own claws* Her small hands SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:55 pm {{Look at her hand. It's beautiful.}} thebestdecepticonleader 8:55 pm Maybe don't call people things NoodlesAtNight 8:55 pm [[He agrees. Those claws must be powerful.]] NoodlesAtNight 8:56 pm {{Her human. It not her fault her hand tiny.}} MedicalMurdersaurus 8:56 pm You whole BIRD tiny : > SpecsTheSpectralDragon 8:56 pm {{Sharp, too. Between muscles and structure... It's a shame humans are so bad at making things clawproof.}} verdigrisprowl 8:57 pm The theory's easy. I lack the... *wiggles his fingers* grace to pull it off. SCProwl 8:57 pm ((criminal lesbians! \o/ Swervester 8:57 pm So, lesbian crimnals onlyu NoodlesAtNight 8:58 pm [[Ahh. He supposes that makes sense.]] *Pause.* [[He wonders what you would be like with a pair of feelers. Harder for criminals to run from, if nothing else.]] MedicalMurdersaurus 8:59 pm *couldn't care less about all this talking and tries to reach over his shoulder to pet Bird instead of watching* verdigrisprowl 8:59 pm ((@gotham i'm already completely burned on barbara's character, sending her through arkham for a reboot and forcing her into a useful role after all the bullshit we got out of her just makes her more annoying)) verdigrisprowl 9:00 pm ((you coulda called lee back and had her go in to seduce the lady)) MedicalMurdersaurus 9:01 pm *is flexible but wings get in a way of getting a solid pet for borb, but damned if he didn't try* NoodlesAtNight 9:02 pm *She'll chirp in thanks anyway* SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:02 pm {{You want to coerce her into getting killed?}} verdigrisprowl 9:04 pm ((@gotham whether this is an act or a legitimate backstab I'm /still/ burned out on her)) NoodlesAtNight 9:05 pm ((i regret to inform you that babs has yet to go away for good)) verdigrisprowl 9:05 pm ((i know. i know.)) Swervester 9:05 pm Really NoodlesAtNight 9:05 pm [[Well. She /is/ clever, at least.]] MedicalMurdersaurus 9:05 pm ((whyyyyyy)) MedicalMurdersaurus 9:06 pm *streeeeeeeeeeeetches out like a ptero-rug* NoodlesAtNight 9:06 pm ((because they keep wanting to do things with her and it not working out. like i said. not the first, not the last. there are a few others besides them too, sadly.)) NoodlesAtNight 9:07 pm [[Have this discussion later. Leave. Now.]] verdigrisprowl 9:07 pm "This is private property." "Girl comes with us." MedicalMurdersaurus 9:07 pm YAHHH MedicalMurdersaurus 9:08 pm DEAD verdigrisprowl 9:08 pm I take it the girl is considered part of the private property. NoodlesAtNight 9:08 pm [[He thinks the security guard was separate from the thugs.]] SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:08 pm {{Experiments often are.}} NoodlesAtNight 9:08 pm [[But in the eyes of Wayne Enterprises? Likely.]] verdigrisprowl 9:08 pm They seemed to be together. MedicalMurdersaurus 9:09 pm ((Bruce is a billionaire with a b. No one is getting him on trespassing.)) NoodlesAtNight 9:09 pm [[Perhaps.]] thebestdecepticonleader 9:09 pm Maybe he should consider giving her another chance verdigrisprowl 9:10 pm ((if he was a millionaire would his name be mruce)) NoodlesAtNight 9:10 pm [[On the one hand, he has a right to tell her to go away forever. On the other hand, she /could/ be useful.]] verdigrisprowl 9:10 pm S— Who's holding something? Someone throw something at Starscream for me. NoodlesAtNight 9:10 pm [[No violence, please. Not even for that.]] thebestdecepticonleader 9:10 pm I'm not saying he should forgive her, I'm saying maybe she has changed thebestdecepticonleader 9:11 pm And I don't really know what lead up to this point verdigrisprowl 9:11 pm Not even a light food item? NoodlesAtNight 9:11 pm *Laserbeak flicks a teeny tiny candy at Starscream. It plinks off his cockpit glass.* NoodlesAtNight 9:12 pm [[Laserbeak! No. Upstairs.]] verdigrisprowl 9:12 pm I appreciate your sacrifice, Laserbeak. thebestdecepticonleader 9:12 pm *faking* Oh no, I'm hit! Man down! MedicalMurdersaurus 9:12 pm *perks up* Noooooo! thebestdecepticonleader 9:12 pm Avenge me! MedicalMurdersaurus 9:12 pm *goes from zero to pout in a hot second, all directed at Soundwave* NoodlesAtNight 9:12 pm {{Neheh. Never catch Bird. Bird got Dinobot.}} thebestdecepticonleader 9:12 pm Tell Megatron I love him UGH! *dies* NoodlesAtNight 9:12 pm *She floats toward the door.* verdigrisprowl 9:12 pm *disgusted grimace* NoodlesAtNight 9:13 pm [[...He refuses to tell Megatron any such thing.]] MedicalMurdersaurus 9:13 pm *scrambles after bird* thebestdecepticonleader 9:13 pm Oh come on it was funny verdigrisprowl 9:13 pm ... Hold on. Let's consider this. thebestdecepticonleader 9:13 pm Besides, he knows verdigrisprowl 9:13 pm If a Megatron was told this, would he be pleased, or revolted? thebestdecepticonleader 9:14 pm Pleased NoodlesAtNight 9:14 pm ((that is a very cold and unhappy soundwave)) opatoes 9:14 pm Don't turn off someone's music! verdigrisprowl 9:14 pm Ah. Then no, let's not tell him. MedicalMurdersaurus 9:14 pm ((the face he hasn't developed an accent as a result of being frozen saddens me)) opatoes 9:14 pm ... Won't he die thebestdecepticonleader 9:14 pm As I said, he knows SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:14 pm {{They /chained/ her up.}} thebestdecepticonleader 9:14 pm I've told him at least twice today verdigrisprowl 9:15 pm I see no benefit to calling any Megatron to inform him of any such thing unless it's going to make him unhappy. NoodlesAtNight 9:15 pm [[That's more thought than he gave it. He simply doesn't care to speak to a Megatron.]] verdigrisprowl 9:15 pm Me neither. I was playing along with the gag. opatoes 9:15 pm Starry... thebestdecepticonleader 9:16 pm Yeah? NoodlesAtNight 9:16 pm [[Ah! Then it was a good gag.]] verdigrisprowl 9:16 pm But now I'm getting actually grossed out. opatoes 9:16 pm ... Nothing, nothing. /Smokescreen's going to pat Starscream!/ NoodlesAtNight 9:16 pm [[...Take the money or take the headache? Group discussion.]] thebestdecepticonleader 9:16 pm *hugs Smokey* you're such a good friend MedicalMurdersaurus 9:16 pm *would vote in favor of fighting just to fight if he wasn't busy being Laserbeak's shadow* NoodlesAtNight 9:17 pm *Through the door* {{MONEY}} verdigrisprowl 9:17 pm Try to kick him in the crotch with my heel. opatoes 9:17 pm I wish I could be a better friend- But thank you, Starry. You're a good friend, too. NoodlesAtNight 9:17 pm [[That is cheating.]] thebestdecepticonleader 9:17 pm Really? opatoes 9:18 pm Yeah! You've always been a good friend. NoodlesAtNight 9:18 pm *Surprised blip* thebestdecepticonleader 9:18 pm You would tell Megatron I loved him if I died, wouldn't you? Like, really died? opatoes 9:18 pm ... You're not going to die, Starry. thebestdecepticonleader 9:18 pm No but, if I did opatoes 9:19 pm You won't! NoodlesAtNight 9:19 pm ((he got an Upgrade 😀 )) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:19 pm {{That's a handsome suit.}} thebestdecepticonleader 9:19 pm Of course not, but still verdigrisprowl 9:19 pm Is the binary question supposed to be taken strictly, or are you actually asking what I'd do in that scenario? opatoes 9:19 pm ... The shooting's not gonna work, is it? MedicalMurdersaurus 9:19 pm ((okay but how did he recognize him at a distance, when the thinks he died, dude's hair is different and all this other stuff)) thebestdecepticonleader 9:19 pm With all these Autobots around you can never be too careful NoodlesAtNight 9:19 pm [[He already knows you would find a third option. In this instance, it is a strict binary.]] SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:19 pm {{Don't do it, Karen.}} thebestdecepticonleader 9:19 pm I mean it opatoes 9:20 pm Oh no ... /Covering Starscream's optics/ NoodlesAtNight 9:20 pm {{Noooo. Dumb icicle human.}} thebestdecepticonleader 9:20 pm 😔 MedicalMurdersaurus 9:20 pm Her EXPLODED keheheh opatoes 9:20 pm /This is at least a good distraction from the question!/ SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:20 pm *the dragon actually jerks back and hisses at that, jaw bandaged shut or no.* NoodlesAtNight 9:20 pm *Tiny shudder. What a horrid way to go.* thebestdecepticonleader 9:20 pm But why? opatoes 9:21 pm ... I just thought of a horrible question thebestdecepticonleader 9:21 pm Hopefully she only felt a bit of the freezing and died instantly opatoes 9:21 pm Do uh. Do those ice bits uh. thebestdecepticonleader 9:21 pm melt? opatoes 9:21 pm Melt, yeah- but thebestdecepticonleader 9:21 pm I imagine so verdigrisprowl 9:21 pm (("she's come home." the only thing you two ever did on screen was sexily flirt for the dudebros watching tv. you ain't a home.)) verdigrisprowl 9:22 pm In this situation, are we assuming that, when I'm given this choice, I know beyond any shadow of a doubt that I will be defeated if I fight back? opatoes 9:22 pm Why didn't he just ask her to draw a picture of the philosopher thebestdecepticonleader 9:22 pm Maybe she can't draw? Couldn't opatoes 9:22 pm Maybe describe him? NoodlesAtNight 9:22 pm [[Hmm. He would like to know both answers - if you know and if you are not sure.]] MedicalMurdersaurus 9:23 pm ((OMFG I'm dying. He used the same nickname that was in a COMPANY NEWSLETTER to hire an assassin.)) verdigrisprowl 9:23 pm If I'm not sure, I'd try to kick him in the crotch with my heel. Which would lead to being knocked out. thebestdecepticonleader 9:24 pm Who are we kicking in the crotch? NoodlesAtNight 9:24 pm ((he's too egotistical to think that would go wrong i think)) verdigrisprowl 9:24 pm If I'm sure, I'd take the money. NoodlesAtNight 9:24 pm ((and now... ouo)) verdigrisprowl 9:24 pm The person standing behind me with a gun trying to take my prisoner. Who, being human, has a vulnerable spot in the crotch. thebestdecepticonleader 9:24 pm Good choice thebestdecepticonleader 9:25 pm You could probably step on them more easily verdigrisprowl 9:25 pm In the scenario I'm a human too. Swervester 9:25 pm Wait did he have a beard before? thebestdecepticonleader 9:25 pm Ah, kick to the crotch is better Swervester 9:25 pm I thought humans don't grow hair after they die NoodlesAtNight 9:26 pm *Is oddly pleased to find one (1) scenario in which Prowl would take the money.* ((there will be a fair amount of flashing any time they return to his cell here)) MedicalMurdersaurus 9:26 pm ((ahhhh god, scratching nails off on a wall is one of the few horror movie things I can't take)) NoodlesAtNight 9:27 pm [[He does not know anything about human hair growth post death. Perhaps he grew it while on the chair.]] verdigrisprowl 9:27 pm People come back from the dead all the time. It doesn't drive them mad. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:27 pm {{Dragon fur does not grow after death.}} thebestdecepticonleader 9:28 pm You know, I think this doctor guy is the worst villain so far opatoes 9:28 pm Oh, for sure! NoodlesAtNight 9:28 pm [[It may be true that they do not know who they are. Were? Hm. Still.]] *His deployers didn't. Not exactly.* verdigrisprowl 9:28 pm Really? He just—walks up to the main suspect and gives everything away? NoodlesAtNight 9:29 pm [[Hmm.]] verdigrisprowl 9:29 pm You don't even have the police backing you up. opatoes 9:29 pm Gordon really is bad at this Swervester 9:29 pm He is... he is so bad at this verdigrisprowl 9:29 pm You jss— Gym, why are you so stupid. thebestdecepticonleader 9:29 pm How has he survived this long? opatoes 9:30 pm He is incredibly lucky NoodlesAtNight 9:30 pm ((also hugo has such an extra tie knot)) ((damn showoff)) MedicalMurdersaurus 9:30 pm Bird, this talky movie boring. verdigrisprowl 9:31 pm *shudders* *leans heavily on Soundwave* NoodlesAtNight 9:31 pm *Leans into Prowl. He's right here. No one like Hugo around.* verdigrisprowl 9:31 pm *shrinks.* *that's a statement about shrinks. he's not shrinking.* verdigrisprowl 9:32 pm *just. /shrinks./* opatoes 9:32 pm Pffff. SunstreakerCMO 9:32 pm -may have fallen asleep at some point- Swervester 9:32 pm [sighs and holds face] *stop giving away your plans Jim* opatoes 9:32 pm when you roll a natural 20 in bluff SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:33 pm *the dragon is watching raptly. what the heck is going on.* verdigrisprowl 9:34 pm ((i. i think this whole act is highly irresponsible but i'm incredibly amused.)) MedicalMurdersaurus 9:34 pm *has a thought and turns to Bird with the most serious expression his baby face can muster* Bird! Talky movies boring BUT! *smiles* Me Swoop okay for talky movie if with You Bird! : > verdigrisprowl 9:34 pm ((ed gets points for creativity)) SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:34 pm ((to be fair, Lucy is probably more like tourettes than a split personality, and blaming tourettes on a ghost is not a bad thing)) NoodlesAtNight 9:35 pm {{Awww. You Swoop good friend. Bird love talky movie.}} SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:35 pm ((if I had to do a watsonian interpretation)) MedicalMurdersaurus 9:35 pm Really? Why? :V SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:35 pm ((the doyleist is, of course, bad writing)) Swervester 9:35 pm //depends on the ttourettes; speaking as someone with tourettes, we have a wide variety of symptoms, and there's more than one type SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:35 pm ((:O)) ((thank you for the correction)) NoodlesAtNight 9:35 pm ((oh yeah no i don't at aaaaaall condone what ed did. or does here)) Swervester 9:35 pm //fgbv ed pls SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:36 pm ((E D)) NoodlesAtNight 9:36 pm ((and yet he somehow pays more attention to the people in there than the real shrinks)) Swervester 9:36 pm Did he accidentally help SCProwl 9:37 pm ((there's so many things wrong with Ed and the show's portrayal of many thing but Ed trying to be like sympathetic and understanding is legit kinda nice opatoes 9:37 pm ((i know right? Swervester 9:37 pm //yeah they def swing back and forth between good and bad writing in terms of ed Swervester 9:38 pm [squints] You're not his dad. Swervester 9:39 pm //i can not begin to articulate how much i hate theo's ears verdigrisprowl 9:40 pm *quietly, but with feeling.* Ugh. NoodlesAtNight 9:40 pm *Low-powered thought.* [[Agreed.]] verdigrisprowl 9:41 pm FINALLY! NoodlesAtNight 9:41 pm *Startles a bit* verdigrisprowl 9:41 pm Sorry. MedicalMurdersaurus 9:41 pm Killing people fun : > NoodlesAtNight 9:41 pm [[No, no. You're fine. You are right.]] verdigrisprowl 9:42 pm I'm just glad he finally admitted he was wrong. NoodlesAtNight 9:42 pm [[May he remember that.]] SpecsTheSpectralDragon 9:42 pm *she really, really wants to accuse Jim of hypocrisy, but Prowl's happy, so she'll keep her mouth shut* thebestdecepticonleader 9:42 pm ((Saint Dumas, saint of thieves and sinners from memory)) NoodlesAtNight 9:42 pm *People do get to learn from what they've done.* Swervester 9:43 pm I take it she doesn't have thorazine then verdigrisprowl 9:43 pm *he's not being a hypocrite; he changed his mind. there's a difference. it's only hypocrisy if he thinks his own actions were right but it would be wrong for others to do the same.* verdigrisprowl 9:44 pm *he's admitted that his actions were wrong. he no longer supports his own past actions. That's good and it's progress and Prowl is pleased to see it.* MedicalMurdersaurus 9:44 pm ((Why is Ed even in there? He's so clearly just a smart guy who kills people when he decides he has a reason to.)) Swervester 9:44 pm Leaving it open for inmates to escape and distract would have helped bim more MedicalMurdersaurus 9:44 pm *chews on his clawtip* NoodlesAtNight 9:44 pm ((he'd get out of blackgate in a minute tbh)) MedicalMurdersaurus 9:44 pm ((fair)) thebestdecepticonleader 9:44 pm ((Nope, just checked, it's Saint Dismas, my mistake)) NoodlesAtNight 9:45 pm ((ye the order of st. dumas afaik is just a batverse thing)) [[...Well, it worked.]] MedicalMurdersaurus 9:45 pm *ERUPTS in laughter* verdigrisprowl 9:45 pm (("excuse me, officer, sometimes I talk to my self. instead of prison, do you think you could send me to--" "oh, dammit.")) *huffs* thebestdecepticonleader 9:46 pm ((yeah, but I thought it was based on Dismas, a real thing)) MedicalMurdersaurus 9:46 pm SMACK (("simple" task)) Swervester 9:46 pm Ambitious time frame MedicalMurdersaurus 9:47 pm ((maybe start by seeing if he can make it to the store and back successfully)) SunstreakerCMO 9:47 pm ((okay, I think I am back now thebestdecepticonleader 9:47 pm Honestly if they kill that doctor, there would be a fraction of the crime there is now NoodlesAtNight 9:47 pm ((wb)) MedicalMurdersaurus 9:49 pm ((look at him with his friends)) SunstreakerCMO 9:49 pm ((thaaaanks)) -waking up about now- opatoes 9:49 pm Heh SCProwl 9:49 pm A monster. verdigrisprowl 9:49 pm Oh, GYM thinks the CAPTAIN is stubborn and angry. SunstreakerCMO 9:50 pm ....what? What did I miss? NoodlesAtNight 9:50 pm [[They both are. One would think they'd get along better for that.]] verdigrisprowl 9:50 pm The captain is the one who suspends and fires people for beating up suspects. Gym is the one who beats up suspects. NoodlesAtNight 9:50 pm [[A valid point.]] MedicalMurdersaurus 9:51 pm ((omfg his cape is SO LOUD how do they not EASILY keep track of him? XD)) thebestdecepticonleader 9:51 pm Sounds about right, like me and Megatron verdigrisprowl 9:51 pm ((maybe it like, echoes)) thebestdecepticonleader 9:51 pm I'm Jim NoodlesAtNight 9:51 pm [[Ah. A formative moment.]] MedicalMurdersaurus 9:51 pm ((omg look at baby bruce's lil heart eyes)) verdigrisprowl 9:51 pm Yeah, I really don't need to hear about your love life. thebestdecepticonleader 9:52 pm Not my love life, I am devoted to him completely verdigrisprowl 9:52 pm *highly doubts that Megatron is the one advocating not beating up people.* thebestdecepticonleader 9:52 pm As a subordinate verdigrisprowl 9:52 pm *Starscream's getting a lot of disgusted grimaces out of Prowl tonight* MedicalMurdersaurus 9:52 pm *starts scratching around some of his armor to dig out bits of grime and ash and whatnot from his time spent being a dirty child* SunstreakerCMO 9:53 pm ...... NoodlesAtNight 9:53 pm [[...Penguin. She may have fired the maid, but that does not mean you cannot clean up.]] thebestdecepticonleader 9:53 pm You know, like how Autobots are devoted to the Prime opatoes 9:53 pm Starry... Starry, no... SunstreakerCMO 9:53 pm -snorts- Not really thebestdecepticonleader 9:53 pm You aren't devoted to the Prime? Swervester 9:54 pm "Devoted" to him's a bit... uh. Much.\ SunstreakerCMO 9:54 pm I am not going to devote myself to a dead mech opatoes 9:54 pm I mean, I was when he was around, yeah, but- maybe not like you apparently are to Megs? SunstreakerCMO 9:54 pm I concern myself with the living MedicalMurdersaurus 9:54 pm Him Prime LAME! Him Grimlock Dinobot King! thebestdecepticonleader 9:54 pm oh is he dead in your verse? MedicalMurdersaurus 9:54 pm Him Grimlock can beat up Prime AND Megatron! SCProwl 9:54 pm Or someone who abandons his own followers. thebestdecepticonleader 9:54 pm Apparently? opatoes 9:54 pm Unfortunately, yeah. I miss him. thebestdecepticonleader 9:55 pm I'm sorry Smokey... do you need help? SunstreakerCMO 9:55 pm He is quite dead in my verse MedicalMurdersaurus 9:55 pm ((hugo don't be an actual cartoon)) thebestdecepticonleader 9:56 pm Who is your leader now though? You are devoted to them right? MedicalMurdersaurus 9:56 pm GRIMLOCK thebestdecepticonleader 9:57 pm See, Swoop agrees SunstreakerCMO 9:57 pm My leader is a mech who should not have to lead, but circumstances were... verdigrisprowl 9:57 pm *make the mistake of talking to Starscream one night and get an earful about how he loves and is devoted to Megatron. And here Prowl had thought this was one trying to cut ties with Megatron. last time Prowl tries to be optimistic.* opatoes 9:57 pm I don't really have a leader, now, I guess? I work with the Megatron in my universe to try to keep Cybertron running, but I think we're pretty much equals. And I mean, if he frags up Cybertron in any way, I'll be the first one to stop him. MedicalMurdersaurus 9:57 pm What Me Swoop agree? *just heard "Prime" and "leader" but has no idea what is happening* thebestdecepticonleader 9:58 pm Oh... so you're the new Prime then? opatoes 9:58 pm what NoodlesAtNight 9:58 pm ((i don't know why but i love how he says the "I've been there. /You/ go." bit)) thebestdecepticonleader 9:58 pm Leader of the Autobots, so you're the Prime, right? opatoes 9:58 pm N. No, I'm not. ... I don't think I am? I've been trying to avoid touching the matrix. MedicalMurdersaurus 9:58 pm ((it is a very Batman villain line)) thebestdecepticonleader 9:58 pm It isn't about the Matrix is it? verdigrisprowl 9:59 pm I'd keep him talking. Ask for more information. Why is Gym being executed? On what "sins"? That sort of thing. thebestdecepticonleader 9:59 pm It's about leadership opatoes 9:59 pm ... But- I mean, the matrix is what makes you a Prime in the first place. SunstreakerCMO 9:59 pm It makes a Prime, not a leader. NoodlesAtNight 9:59 pm [[He wonders if Azrael would be fool enough to mention Strange.]] thebestdecepticonleader 9:59 pm At least, as far as I know, I'm not an Autobot verdigrisprowl 9:59 pm Keep him distracted while covertly comming for assistance. If he does mention Strange, he'll call him "Dumas." That's who he thinks he is. opatoes 9:59 pm I mean, the war's been over. We don't really have separate leaders now, you know? But I do a lot of work to make sure bots have a place to go home to when they arrive, and that they can get the education they need, and kinda other day-to-day issues that might come up. verdigrisprowl 10:00 pm If he DOES mention Dumas, that'll be a big hint to them about, if not Azrael's full identity, then at least his allegiances. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 10:00 pm {{Those are some bad hinges.}} NoodlesAtNight 10:00 pm [[Hmm. True. Still, he might describe other things about where he was. You do have a good idea.]] thebestdecepticonleader 10:00 pm You're the Autobot equivalent of Megatron though... does that mean you are going to kill me NoodlesAtNight 10:00 pm [[...Ahhhh. Good point.]] SpecsTheSpectralDragon 10:01 pm {{And the sword is not much better, hm?}} SunstreakerCMO 10:01 pm ...... Swervester 10:01 pm H got distracted too much opatoes 10:01 pm What? No, no, I'm not, Starry. We're friends. Like I said, the war's over here! You're safe. You used to stay at my place to stay away from Megatron... verdigrisprowl 10:01 pm And that's why you do more than a few hours of conditioning before sending someone out with a false identity. Give them a story that's harder for them to stop believing. thebestdecepticonleader 10:01 pm I mean... the war isn't over in my universe Swervester 10:01 pm And now, when the captain is finally convinced Gordon wasn't lying, he's dead and can't help so he'll have to convince the NEXT one. opatoes 10:02 pm But that's not my war- and I don't want to hurt you, anyway. You're a good bot, Starry. MedicalMurdersaurus 10:02 pm KAHAHHA verdigrisprowl 10:02 pm *HUFF* Or that. MedicalMurdersaurus 10:02 pm BAM! thebestdecepticonleader 10:02 pm Am I? verdigrisprowl 10:02 pm I think they'll believe him. SpecsTheSpectralDragon 10:02 pm {{Wow.}} opatoes 10:02 pm You are! Without a doubt. thebestdecepticonleader 10:02 pm ((lol that line was great)) opatoes 10:02 pm And, I mean- I think I remember you mentioned almost becoming an Autobot one time? ... You don't remember that, do you? thebestdecepticonleader 10:03 pm But I failed Megatron today... I guess that means I am good in your eyes though No I don't remember that, I wouldn't abandon Megatron, ever verdigrisprowl 10:03 pm New policy: if you're in Gotham and you want someone dead, decapitate, AND crush brain. MedicalMurdersaurus 10:04 pm ((do they seriously just sit around all day by a fireplace? that seems great.)) thebestdecepticonleader 10:04 pm Sounds gross verdigrisprowl 10:04 pm Or else they're going to come back. thebestdecepticonleader 10:04 pm Still gross Swervester 10:04 pm Is she losing it again opatoes 10:04 pm ... Starry, I know, I know. You're always good in my eyes, you know? Uh. What happened, though? thebestdecepticonleader 10:05 pm Oh, it was great, he even forgave me for missing my target! He was really disappointed though I felt terrible SunstreakerCMO 10:05 pm ....that...sounds like it is not a good thing SpecsTheSpectralDragon 10:05 pm {{It might be wise to remove the liver and heart, too. Can't get far without either one.}} SunstreakerCMO 10:05 pm Your city is going mad thebestdecepticonleader 10:06 pm Oh no it was great, he didn't even yell much NoodlesAtNight 10:06 pm [[That is generally the accepted way to destroy a zombie. Which... he doesn't know if these qualify, but they have come back from the dead, and that is close enough.]] opatoes 10:06 pm ... Did he do anything to you? Like I said- if he's still mad, you can, uh- drop by my place for the night? NoodlesAtNight 10:06 pm [[Hm. Interesting trick.]] verdigrisprowl 10:06 pm It prevents a zombie from forming. NoodlesAtNight 10:06 pm [[And that.]] SunstreakerCMO 10:07 pm .....what? verdigrisprowl 10:07 pm *tisks at ed.* Take your tools with you. thebestdecepticonleader 10:07 pm No, he just told me how bad my failure made him feel, and then told me to practice so that it doesn't happen again NoodlesAtNight 10:07 pm [[Nygma is about to get an unpleasant surprise.]] SpecsTheSpectralDragon 10:07 pm {{Well, if I wanted to truly prevent a human-type zombie from being effective, after I removed the organs I would sever all the tendons. Or simply burn it from the beginning.}} MedicalMurdersaurus 10:07 pm *perks up and looks over* Burn? SunstreakerCMO 10:07 pm ........I think I should have stayed at home opatoes 10:08 pm ... Okay. I'm glad he didn't do anything- but if you do ever need a break from being there, you know my place is always open, right? NoodlesAtNight 10:08 pm ((i hope y'all are lookin forward to next week because LEMME TELL YOU WHAT.... yep)) thebestdecepticonleader 10:08 pm I would like to stay, but he doesn't like when I leave for long periods of time, he says he gets worried about me Swervester 10:08 pm //lmao SpecsTheSpectralDragon 10:08 pm ((hoo boy)) SunstreakerCMO 10:09 pm ((OuO MedicalMurdersaurus 10:09 pm Bird. Me Swoop tired. NoodlesAtNight 10:09 pm {{You want nap upstairs?}} MedicalMurdersaurus 10:09 pm Yah! With You Bird. NoodlesAtNight 10:10 pm {{Kaaay. Go run run. Bird get snacks, bring up.}} thebestdecepticonleader 10:10 pm Maybe I could stay a few hours? opatoes 10:10 pm ... Well, uh- do you wanna dance for a bit, then? And, uh- maybe, if you stay for a bit longer, he'll start to get used to it and not bug you? MedicalMurdersaurus 10:10 pm *bobbles his head in agreement and goes on ahead without her* opatoes 10:10 pm Yeah! Yeah, a few hours would be probably good. thebestdecepticonleader 10:10 pm Hey yeah, that might work opatoes 10:10 pm Give us the music! NoodlesAtNight 10:11 pm [[What makes you regret your visit, Sunstreaker?]] SunstreakerCMO 10:11 pm ......just....something on screen. thebestdecepticonleader 10:11 pm not a fan of violence? NoodlesAtNight 10:11 pm ((time marker: 10:30)) SunstreakerCMO 10:12 pm I was a frontliner before becoming a medic. Violence is hardly the issue. thebestdecepticonleader 10:12 pm cool SpecsTheSpectralDragon 10:12 pm *the dragon stretches, and waves goodbye* thebestdecepticonleader 10:12 pm We could try to warn you next time though SunstreakerCMO 10:12 pm -absent wave to the dragon- NoodlesAtNight 10:12 pm *Soundwave nods goodbye to those leaving.* [[Travel safely.]] thebestdecepticonleader 10:12 pm *waves* NoodlesAtNight 10:13 pm [[Yes. He does try to keep those who need to be informed of something in the know.]] thebestdecepticonleader 10:13 pm I'm going to record the people here tonight as safe if that's okay? verdigrisprowl 10:13 pm ... What do you mean. SunstreakerCMO 10:13 pm I know you do, Soundwave. I just....it is not something I like to talk about. thebestdecepticonleader 10:14 pm I lost my memory, so I'm writing down people who won't try to kill me if I see them opatoes 10:14 pm Yeah! They're safe. Soundwave can be weird- but he's safe. thebestdecepticonleader 10:14 pm It's sort of... inconvenient to walk up to someone, say hi and get shot verdigrisprowl 10:15 pm Keep me off the list. thebestdecepticonleader 10:15 pm Okay verdigrisprowl 10:15 pm *he doesn't know under what circumstances Starscream plans on walking up to him. He's making no promises.* thebestdecepticonleader 10:15 pm Does that mean I should avoid these screenings then? SunstreakerCMO 10:15 pm ....for your safety, I should be excluded as well verdigrisprowl 10:15 pm I'm not the host. thebestdecepticonleader 10:16 pm Hmmmm, probably going to stay away then, just in case NoodlesAtNight 10:16 pm [[Very well. Tell him if you change your mind, Sunstreaker.]]

*Does NOT tell Starscream to exclude him. Being marked safe has its advantages.* thebestdecepticonleader 10:16 pm Pity, I enjoyed it NoodlesAtNight 10:16 pm [[If you like. He would not allow you to come to harm unless you began a fight first.]] SCProwl 10:16 pm *going to enjoy the music and allow herself to be marked safe. because reasons* SunstreakerCMO 10:17 pm I will. But, for now, I will keep my silence. thebestdecepticonleader 10:17 pm Yeah, but if I get shot, having them be told that they shouldn't have done that... well it's not going to bring me back to life SunstreakerCMO 10:17 pm -he could be marked safe, but Sideswipe, who tends to follow on his heels, is /not/- SCProwl 10:17 pm ((lol SunstreakerCMO 10:18 pm ((pffff verdigrisprowl 10:18 pm *if being marked as unsafe keeps Mr. I'm Devoted To Megatron from showing up in Prowl's universe with Decepticon conquest on his mind, he'll take the hit of being considered unsafe.* thebestdecepticonleader 10:20 pm Right so, marking most as not safe got it thebestdecepticonleader 10:21 pm Smokey, you're still under safe, right? SCProwl 10:21 pm Soundwave. Will you send me copies of the music we've listened to tonight? I'd like to listen to it at home. NoodlesAtNight 10:22 pm *Soundwave considers this.* [[...He will trade you for some of the oldest music you have.]] opatoes 10:22 pm I should be! I mean- yeah, I'm safe, don't worry, Starry. thebestdecepticonleader 10:22 pm *relieved* thanks SCProwl 10:23 pm All right. I'll compile some files and send them too you. ((yesss thank you opatoes 10:24 pm /Ohhhh! Oh! He's gonna get up and dance to this!/ NoodlesAtNight 10:24 pm *Soundwave turns his face away. He doesn't need to see Smokescreen dancing to these lyrics.* SunstreakerCMO 10:25 pm .....anyway, thank you for the show, I have to be going now. Good night, Soundwave. thebestdecepticonleader 10:25 pm *dances with Smokey* opatoes 10:25 pm /That's too bad! Smokescreen's having fun doing some classic Cybertronian dances to this!/ thebestdecepticonleader 10:25 pm Goodnight NoodlesAtNight 10:26 pm [[Goodnight, Sunstreaker.]] opatoes 10:26 pm Night night! SCProwl 10:26 pm *time to end the connection to the visual feed* NoodlesAtNight 10:27 pm *...It occurs to him that this might have been a strange thing to put on immediately after promising to send his timeline's Prowl the music he played.* *If fate is kind, she will say nothing.* thebestdecepticonleader 10:27 pm ((night all)) NoodlesAtNight 10:27 pm [[Well. That is all for the night, those of you who remain. Minus those who know they are allowed to stay.]] opatoes 10:28 pm Thank you for having us, Soundwave! Maybe we can dance together some more later? Swervester 10:28 pm See you next week! opatoes 10:28 pm And, uh- do you have an ultraviolet light, by any chance? SCProwl 10:28 pm *says nothing because sometimes it's better NOT to know things* NoodlesAtNight 10:28 pm [[Perhaps. He does not dance often. ... And yes. But he will not give it to you.]] *To Swerve* [[Until then, Swerve.]] SCProwl 10:29 pm Goodnight, everyone. opatoes 10:29 pm Oh. Okay, then. Uh. Next time you see Starscream, would it be invasive to check him over with it? 'Cause, uh. NoodlesAtNight 10:30 pm [[Starscream may ask for that on his own if he wishes.]] opatoes 10:30 pm That's true, that's true. ... Is he going to be okay? opatoes 10:31 pm ... Anyway, I should probably go. Have a good night, Soundwave. verdigrisprowl 10:31 pm *... would rather wait for Smokescreen to leave, but. As long as it's relevant to the conversation at hand.* A few weeks ago, Starscream asked for help breaking mind control. Repeatedly. I noticed you didn't speak up. opatoes 10:31 pm Wait, he did? verdigrisprowl 10:31 pm Not here. At the library. verdigrisprowl 10:32 pm And now he's not only forgotten who he is, he's talking about how much he loves and is devoted to Megatron. opatoes 10:32 pm ... The library? What library? verdigrisprowl 10:32 pm MY library. You weren't there. You're not invited. opatoes 10:32 pm Yeah, I figured. verdigrisprowl 10:32 pm This is about Starscream, not the library. NoodlesAtNight 10:33 pm *Soundwave looks at Prowl for a moment. ... Oh no. Oh, oh no. He hadn't put two and two together. So many people just randomly lose their memories around the multiverse, he tends to chalk it up to greyfaces if they do not seem agitated about it--* verdigrisprowl 10:33 pm He WANTED out. He asked for help getting out. I didn't offer him help getting out because I don't have any power to offer him that help, and I wasn't going to speak for you. NoodlesAtNight 10:34 pm ((i gotta go see the log hold on)) verdigrisprowl 10:35 pm (( https://verdigrisprowl.tumblr.com/post/181601734329/dec-28-library-movie-night-blosc-nos-episodes )) ((that one?)) NoodlesAtNight 10:36 pm ((yeah i'm skimming one sec)) verdigrisprowl 10:36 pm ((o7 will wait til you say you're good)) NoodlesAtNight 10:38 pm ((oh hell he mentioned it was ongoing right at the same time i was focused on the screen and different pieces of conversation)) NoodlesAtNight 10:39 pm ((welp)) verdigrisprowl 10:39 pm ((i mean i'm sure this IS a m!a but like, prowl won't assume that)) verdigrisprowl 10:40 pm ((and this has been bugging him since that night)) NoodlesAtNight 10:40 pm [[He thought it was being asked out of pure cur--]] *His mouth turns down and into a heavy frown.* [[He said then he was trying to kill Megatron, but tonight - Primus. It was in front of him--]] verdigrisprowl 10:41 pm You had the power to help him then. You didn't. He's taken a MASSIVE step back. NoodlesAtNight 10:41 pm [[/He didn't realize it!/]] verdigrisprowl 10:41 pm You still have the power to help him now—but as he is at this moment, I doubt he'll want it. NoodlesAtNight 10:42 pm *Soundwave's already using his feelers like Tarantulas does silk to pull himself across the room and up into the lighting above.*

[[Stay there. You can have a light, Smokescreen.]] verdigrisprowl 10:43 pm Good. *because if Soundwave hadn't offered the blacklight, Prowl would have insisted on it.* opatoes 10:44 pm Thank you, Soundwave. I talked to him the other night- about maybe sharing my memories with him via a patch, so he could remember more? I didn't want to mention how his Megatron actually was, in case he refused it, but- I figured if he saw those memories, he might remember bits about how Megatron actually was? Plus, he'd remember a few more things, which is good for him, right? verdigrisprowl 10:45 pm *the tightest grimace. but he doesn't have a better plan.* NoodlesAtNight 10:46 pm *Give him a second to disconnect a whole damn spotlight. It's intricate up here. He'll project replies from in the metal caging.*

[[Thank Prowl. Not him. Prowl is the one who noticed.]] *And that is humiliating, he must say. Clearly, he's been slacking off at movie nights. He'll have to pay less attention to the screen and more to the conversations, as he used to on the Lost Light.* [[And that is a workable plan - if he agrees to it and you have no better tool at hand. Have you ever used one on your own?]] opatoes 10:47 pm Oh. ... Then, thank you, Prowl. verdigrisprowl 10:47 pm Don't thank me. NoodlesAtNight 10:47 pm *...And he told Smokescreen to talk to Prowl. Wonderful job, Soundwave. Going for strike three now?* verdigrisprowl 10:48 pm *to Soundwave* Is there any other way to get more of his memories back? We don't even know how he lost them. opatoes 10:48 pm I've never used one on my own, though. I mean- the only time I've used it was when Megatron was breaking into my head, so I could probably use a few tips! verdigrisprowl 10:49 pm *very quietly shudders* NoodlesAtNight 10:54 pm [[He will send you a copy of the original user manual. /Do not/ attempt a patch without reading it cover to cover, and do not skim. Bumblebee had Liege Maximo's own luck, not frying his mind. Keep someone nearby to monitor you both, lest you lose yourselves or suffer some kind of damage.]]

*Soundwave considers the memory question.* [[If Smokescreen was /well/ trained, or else had his abilities, he could seek out fragments of ruined memories and investigate what was deleted to potentially uncover other pieces. Given enough traces, one could stitch together some semblance of the original memory. Details would be missing, or need to be invented, but...]] *He lowers himself down and holds out the light.* [[Even that much is not always possible.]] verdigrisprowl 10:54 pm Smokescreen doesn't have to be the one doing it. verdigrisprowl 10:55 pm I'm not asking what Smokescreen can do. I'm asking what can be done. NoodlesAtNight 10:55 pm [[Oh. Then that is, on rare occasion, possible.]] *He's rescued a tiny handful that way over the years.* opatoes 10:56 pm Yeah! That part doesn't have to be me. All I'm doing is letting him into my head so he can have my memories of him- so he might start to remember some stuff on his own, or maybe go to you for a better job. NoodlesAtNight 10:57 pm [[If he wants to come here, he can. He is - he regrets that he did not listen as well as he should have.]] verdigrisprowl 10:58 pm The second he's back to normal—IF he gets back to normal... ... I have no authority to tell you to offer to help him. But I strongly recommend it. opatoes 10:59 pm ... I'll mention that you can help him more, Soundwave. And try to set up a place for him on my Cybertron- so he wouldn't have to go back if he does go back to normal. NoodlesAtNight 10:59 pm [[Breaking the control, you mean?]] verdigrisprowl 10:59 pm Yes. NoodlesAtNight 10:59 pm [[He will do what he can.]]

*Nods to Smokescreen.* [[Good. Any supplies that you require, he will help you find.]] verdigrisprowl 11:00 pm He asked for help and nobody offered it. He shouldn't have to ask again. opatoes 11:01 pm Thank you, Soundwave. It might be good to have someone monitor and make sure that nothing goes wrong? I could set up a video feed and ping you my coordinates. NoodlesAtNight 11:01 pm [[He does not want to assume he has the right to try to fix Starscream's helm. That was - he did not mean anything else by it.]] [[Yes. Yes, that is fine.]] opatoes 11:03 pm Thank you, Soundwave. I'll try to get stuff setup tonight and talk to Starscream. See you later? NoodlesAtNight 11:03 pm [[Yes.]] NoodlesAtNight 11:04 pm *Soundwave just kind of rubs his temples and stares at the floor paneling in a closed-optic kind of way.* verdigrisprowl 11:05 pm ... Mad to be involved or mad you weren't involved sooner? NoodlesAtNight 11:06 pm *Quiet.* [[Both. If]] [][][]mad to be involved[][][] [[covers that someone has caused all of this to be necessary.]] NoodlesAtNight 11:07 pm [[Megatron, most likely. He patched our Starscream, after all.]] verdigrisprowl 11:09 pm *jerky nod* ... I should have talked to you about this sooner. Before this. THIS is far too late to start doing something about it. verdigrisprowl 11:10 pm I— *face twists as he looks for the right words* —couldn't—that night, I couldn't—bring myself to— verdigrisprowl 11:11 pm I told him to be quiet. NoodlesAtNight 11:12 pm *Soundwave lets his hands fall to his sides and turns to come back to Prowl. He can be mad about his own failure to listen and protect later.* [[You were in a position of extreme mental stress. You cannot be expected to provide sufficient care for someone if you are in great need of it yourself at the time.]] verdigrisprowl 11:13 pm *shakes his head angrily* I should have talked to you about this sooner. Period. Full stop. He might have lost everything. NoodlesAtNight 11:17 pm [[You were not the only one there. No one else spoke to him about it either. He will not have you take so much blame.]] *Vent.* [[And the original fault is still his.]] verdigrisprowl 11:19 pm As much as you'd like to, you can't take the blame away from me. I should have talked to you about this sooner. PERIOD. NoodlesAtNight 11:22 pm *Tiny flinch at the increased volume. He already feels like he failed Prowl as well as Starscream. He doesn't really want to be shouted at too.* [[...Very well.]] [][][]But you can't un-fry an egg.[][][] [[All that can be done is to deal with how things now are.]] verdigrisprowl 11:23 pm *sharp nod* NoodlesAtNight 11:23 pm *Mutter.* [[Been a while since he killed one.]] verdigrisprowl 11:25 pm *sharp look* NoodlesAtNight 11:25 pm *Glances over and tilts his head. What.* verdigrisprowl 11:25 pm *what? you said the weird thing.* NoodlesAtNight 11:26 pm *After a few seconds, gets the impression Prowl isn't going to say anything out loud. So, he guesses.*

[[Megatrons. Not Starscreams.]] verdigrisprowl 11:27 pm ... Don't drag a war home. NoodlesAtNight 11:28 pm [[Oh.]] *Small wave.* [[He knows better than to bring war to your planet.]] verdigrisprowl 11:29 pm Or to yours. NoodlesAtNight 11:29 pm [[That too.]] NoodlesAtNight 11:32 pm *Vent.* [[If it /is/ Megatron, and he drags them to that Prime, he will have the Decepticons out for his spark. If he leaves whoever it was alive, then there is a chance they will do it to someone else. At least killing him could be done in secret.]] *And another.* [[But he expects that, too, is wrong, somehow.]] verdigrisprowl 11:33 pm I'd recommend you focus on helping the person who needs help before you start plotting murder. NoodlesAtNight 11:34 pm [[He gave Smokescreen the manual and the light. He cannot do anything else until he knows what is coming next. He might as well consider the rest of the situation.]] verdigrisprowl 11:34 pm Hm. NoodlesAtNight 11:35 pm *He's just gonna sit, now. If that's all right.* verdigrisprowl 11:35 pm *yeah, that's all right.* ... I'm going home. NoodlesAtNight 11:35 pm [[...Why?]] verdigrisprowl 11:37 pm Because I just spent a night listening to a mech who a few weeks ago asked for help with mind control talking about how much he loves and admires the mech who's mind controlling him, while in the background a show plays about a filthy shadowplaying shrink and the victims he's ensnared, imprisoned, and traumatized. verdigrisprowl 11:38 pm I am useless, I am disgusted, I am ashamed, I am angry, and I am in no mood for anything EXCEPT going home. NoodlesAtNight 11:41 pm [[No, no - he didn't mean he expected--]] *And so quiet, now.* [[He just wanted to know if you were angry with him.]] *Pause.* [[And you are not useless.]]

[[But you have the right to go where you will. Be safe, then.]] verdigrisprowl 11:42 pm ... A little. verdigrisprowl 11:43 pm Evening. *he disappears.* NoodlesAtNight 11:43 pm *That 'a little' weighs roughly sixteen tons. He'll fold his hands and press his face into them, and then not move for several hours.*

#chat

[thechroniclesofdaraliss]

D&D Story: Love Hurts

In one of my favorite D&D campaigns I’ve run, I amassed an impressive group of PCs. Among our ranks were a mysterious Cleric, a careful Rogue, a protective Wizard, an extremely well-read Monk, an improvising Illusionist, and a Paladin of many...interests. Despite all of the odds, I managed to get the party in a place where they could all get what they wanted out of each session, and still make the dynamic work. But just when you think you’ve got a whole party dynamic down, things change. In this installation of D&D Story, I learned that sometimes the best moments in campaign occur when things go horribly wrong. Here’s what happened.

Context: The party has been travelling through the wilderness trying to find the alchemists responsible for twisting innocent children into horrible monsters. The journey was trying, and they finally got a lead on a castle that belonged to a noble named Mallister. Here’s what happened.

DM: You arrive at Fort Mallister. It’s a grand fortress meant to repel any invading force. You see dozens of archers along every wall, and each wall goes forty feet high. You also see that there’s only one entrance through the front gate, and you know that all of the men inside are tried and tested battle combatants.

Rogue: This may be a problem

Paladin: Are you kidding? There are six of us. We can take them.

Cleric: I wouldn’t go that far.

Illusionist: Wait! What if we caused a distraction?

Rogue: A distraction large enough to make all of the guards leave?

Illusionist: I’m sure we can think of something. What about the Cleric? Can’t she summon monsters?

Cleric: I can, but I don’t have a lot of control over what comes out of that spell.

Illusionist: Well I say it’s worth a shot.

The party looks to each other, and they come to an unsteady agreement

Cleric: Let’s do this.

Cleric proceeds to summon a monster. Everyone looks eagerly to see what emerges.

DM: You look out and see that the Cleric’s summoning has caused a circle of brimstone to emerge in the ground. From its smoldering confines, you feel a horrible flame and rank smell emerge as a obsidian-scaled dragon emerges. It is of medium size, but its ferocity shows in its wild eyes and blood-soaked teeth. Smoke emerges from its wide-set horns and its sharp nose burns like coals in a fire.

Rogue: Crap!

DM: The dragon looks at you all, and its pupils disappear in excited bloodlust.

Cleric: We need to get out of here, now!

The party proceeds to duck behind a massive stone

DM: You duck safely behind cover, but the dragon hurtles molten venom at the boulder that separates you. In mere moments, the rock begins to crack and the pieces that fall to the ground start an impressive fire

Rogue: I thought you had control over the creatures you summon!

Cleric: I let myself get possessed by a Demon in my backstory, and most of my power comes from him! It’s not my fault!

Illusionist: I’ve got another idea!

Party: We don’t need any more ideas!

Illusionist: Just because he’s out here, doesn’t mean we can’t use him! We just need to direct his anger elsewhere!

Rogue: A distraction for a distraction?!

Monk: That’s crazy! The last thing we need is for a hot-tempered male dragon to get distracted by something else. You might just get him angry!

Wizard: How do you know it’s a male?

Monk: I don’t like to assume gender, but I read up on dragons in the last village. He has the wider horn structure and the sharp nose of an Abyssal Dragon.

Illusionist: I’ll just need to focus. Give me some time! DM! What do I need to roll?

DM: In conditions like these, you’ll get a -4 to Concentration. You need to roll a 16 or higher.

Illusionist: 16!!!

DM: You hold your staff tightly in both hands. Your eyes glow as you cast an illusion just beyond the reaches of the growing forest fire. Soon, a cloud of azure smoke forms and lightening bursts at the center like a heartbeat. But then, the smoke settles, and the light turn orange. A radiant burst of energy shoots out and reveals another dragon as grand and piercing as the dawn.

Wizard: How does that help us?!

Monk: DM, what does this dragon look like? DM: The dragon is almost exactly like its predecessor, save for its redder scales, its closely-set horns, and its aerodynamic nose.

Cleric: Are you suggesting…

Paladin: I think he is.

Illusionist: I roll to make my illusion dragon seduce the real dragon.

DM: You do specialize in illusions, not dragons, so you will take a slight penalty.

Monk: I’m going to give him advice.

DM: Then forget I spoke.

The Monk whispers in the Illusionist’s ear

DM: As you wave your staff toward your Illusion, she spreads her wings and gives the Abyssal Dragon a demure look. The Dragon soon forgets he’s chasing the party and turns his attention to his potential mate. A sort of dance occurs, and he approaches.

Illusionist: Guys, we have a problem.

Paladin: What?!

Illusionist: I specialize in illusions, and when the dragon realizes that this was a fake, he’s going to be pissed!

Rogue: We’ll think of something!

DM: You hear a voice call up from Fort Mallister.

Cleric: Oh yeah, I forgot that was a thing.

Paladin: Shh! I’m trying to watch a Dragon mating display!

The party loses it

DM: You hear the voice again, only this time more intense.

Guard Captain: FIRE!!!!

DM: A storm of arrows falls onto the dragons, and while one feels the arrows burn on contact with is flesh, the “female dragon” is untouched.

Illusionist: I have my Illusion take flight above the fortress!!!

Rogue: But why?

Illusionist: Apparently mating displays among dragons turn violent.

Wizard: Do you ever get tired of writing down this flavor text?

DM: Not when you guy use it to such amazing effect!

Rogue: So what’s happening?!

DM: The Dragons descend on the other side of the walls. The Guards immediately launch everything they have. Arrows, men, even the dogs are being loosed to attack these dragons head-on. You see flares of dragon fire shooting off into the sky, and the gate has been swung open. Some Guards flee in either terror or pain, and they search desperately for the closest river.

Paladin: Hot.

Illusionist: Guys. I’m not sure how much longer this spell is going to work. My magic works best when I can see my spellwork in front of me.

Monk: DM, how much time do we have?

DM: One turn.

Party: NO!!!!!

The party charges through the gate, consequences be damned

Rogue: We have so many questions that need to be answered!

Wizard: We need to save the children!

Paladin: I’m not missing out on a Draconic one-night-stand!

DM: You look out and see that the illusion is working too well. The Illusion Dragon stares deeply into the Abyssal Dragon’s eyes, and they both seem entranced. But you see that the Illusion is fading. The Abyssal Dragon is none the wiser.

Cleric: He’s found love!

Illusionist: I can’t believe I’m doing this.

Monk: What?! The Illusionists waves his staff, and with what arrows that are still flying at them, they seem to pierce the neck of the Illusion Dragon

Party: NOOOOOO!!!!!!

DM: The Abyssal Dragon is devastated, and lets his fiery tongue gently wipe off the blood that seeps from the arrows. The Guards continue running in different directions, and the Abyssal Dragon charges directly through the front door leading into the stronghold. You hear countless battle cries, the unsheathing of swords, and the cries of those who perish in Dragonfire. Finally, a whimper calls out louder than any hateful cry.

The Party rushes inside, finding that dozens, perhaps even hundreds have perished in this fire. Yet the Abyssal Dragon looks out to all of you, gutted, pierced, and nearly decapitated

Cleric: I’m so sorry…

The Party crowds around the Abyssal Dragon and gently touches its head.

DM: The head is quite cool.

Cleric: I didn’t mean for this to happen. You were supposed to take down some thugs and then disappear back into the Abyssal Plane.

Paladin: May the spirits take you to your beloved Illusion Dragon.

Rogue: Shit, I’m actually crying.

Monk: It’s alright.

Wizard: You will be avenged. Folmer Mallister will pay. This is no longer his castle, it is the tomb of a Dragon brave enough to love.

DM: The Dragon gives you what appears to be a smile, and falls to the ground lifeless.

Party: …

Party: LET’S GET MALLISTER!!!!

And thus began the revenge quest to avenge a fallen dragon that was so ready to love he burned down an entire army and castle.

#d&d stories #shit my players say #the chronicles of daraliss #funny #feels

[sparklball]

pokemon green part 25: ＭＡＧＩＣＩＡＮ　ｗｉｔｈｄｒａｗｓ　ｔｈｅ

ok for real this time

oh good i really had to take a leak

HOLY FUCK

........."lee"??

think again fucker

s-stone... i hope you can.... forgive me... someday......

fucko has really bad hand-eye coordination

thanks this is really informative

anyway give that FAWFI a name

......you know, speaking of aerodactyl, i totally forgot to get the old amber from the museum. oops

holy fuck im getting some good pokeys today

"can understand what a man said" damn, that's impressive

i.... dont know what move that is

.....pengpa?

another ball, gone in the name of safari zoning

that.... uh... wow

any relation to the clitty clippor

.....

.........

......................

can you fucking believe this shit

yeah yeah blah blah blah we got the surf hm

PRAISE HELIX

does it even have feet...??

GOOD INDEED

name this good egg

ok so we all know that surf is the only hm move that's actually good but you also cant delete hm moves, like, ever in this game w/o "exploiting the day-care" SO, AUDIENCE PARTICIPATION TIME: should i teach chonk surf

i was thinking of selling them tbh

easy there pal

i... i can actually understand what this guy is trying to say. could it be the translators are... improving?? (canned laughter)

yeah as if

anyway so now we can either hit up the gym, or... not do that, go fight the trainers on the next route, and come back to the gym later

the gym leader is cheerios?????? holy shit this is gonna be the best gym battle ever

it’s 10:16 PM dude

DEAR LORD THERE'S A GIANT HOLE IN THIS MAN'S HEAD SOMEBODY CALL AN AMBULANCE

THAT WAS REALLY CLOSE

wow... wat a team

you sick fuck

ok thanks other hole-in-head guy

WELL THIS DOESNT LOOK GOOD

NOT EVEN FART COULD KILL IT... WHAT IS THIS

WHAT SORT OF HORRIBLE POKEMONSTER IS THIS

"your strength is admirable, fart the haunter... wanna have dinner sometime ;-)"

uhh what was that part about training boys

look at this fucking wigglytuff sprite

kadabra's sprite is... pretty good

ok so last time on engreen we went to the safari zone which was pretty cool, and now we're in koga's gym

....correction: we're in the pokemon center near koga's gym

so... youre procrastinating? it's ok dude, im sure you'll--

--uh

oh no it's flex's evil twin

SPUUUUUURKLLLLLLLLLE

he's going to "delegate" satan???? ....why do i feel like ive made this joke before

holy fu-- you cant see it here but it's a bunch of water drops flickering across the screen

lizar please learn a better fire move

PLEASE STOP

no thanks, im trying to lay off the curious sugar

thanks

......persian?

ok good i was right. that was an easy one

.....what????????

youre also a what now

...i.... i think engreen is translating "ninjas" as "spies"

here i am with my spy clan, spy clan, here we stand

dude stop standing in front of the save window, do you MIND

HOW DID "NINJA" BECOME "SPY"

oh no it's lizar's evil twin

yeah you better run

what are you DOING

make up your fucking mind, dude

ARE YOU SERIOUS

STOP THAT

WHY!!! WHAT ARE YOU HOPING TO ACCOMPLISH BY DOING THIS

YOU CANT RUN AWAY FOREVER

EAT MY ASS

uh... wing attack?

[about fucking time you greasy bird]

why... is wing attack... weaker than GUST

YOU DESERVE THIS

not only did this thing survive fart's 10million volt, it's apparently getting off on it

this is getting too hardcore for me

GOD

that's deep, man

aaaaaaaa a ghost

........

...................................what????

why is he actually using poison-types.... not that it's a problem with this matchup, lmao

seriously, dude

?????????

oh thank fuck

NOOOOOO

did cheeyao just use an x-attack two turns in a row

X-ATTACKS WONT SAVE YOU FROM THE EVER-LOOMING INEVITABILITY OF DEATH

finally something that isnt poison

[would you say youre glad it’s over]

.....stran??

.......stran

BE STRONG, CHONK

thanks for the proo

yeah if only. maybe try spamming x-defen(d)s instead next time

is he telling me to slowly kill myself

wooo

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[blogobot5000]

EVE: Love me a good beard

BONNIE: But his beard, you know how there’s good beards and then there’s beards that… aren’t.

EVE: Yes.

BONNIE: His … was aren’t. His was not good. It was not. It was. Messy.

EVE: Nothing worse than a messy beard.

BONNIE: UNLESS THAT’S THE STYLE.

CLEO: Was it a style?

BONNIE: This was not a style.

EVE: Rough.

BONNIE: So… I mean. His shirt was also like NOT CORRECTLY BUTTONED. He did not put an ounce of effort into how he looked, it seemed. Like I busted my ass leaving work, showering, getting ready, and then rushing to HIS AREA to meet him at LIFE ALIVE and like … he did not seem like he cared or tried to look nice for the date? It wasn’t like “I intentionally looked careless cause that’s the look I’m going for’ it wasn’t that at all. I know he did want it to be a date cause he mentioned bringing me over after if it went well…

EVE: DID YOU?!

BONNIE: I’m getting there! So, I mean I also DID NOT like the way he talked. He just. Had this way with his hands. And his voice reminded me of Alan –

CLEO: OH, FUCK HIM!

BONNIE: Exactly! So noooooo thank you. ALAN CLONE. NOPE. And put your hands away. But he was nice and he was trying.

EVE: Except for his clothes.

BONNIE: HIS VOICE WAS TRYING. So, we left and he asked if I wanted to get a drink – and I was like sure!

GWEN: You gotta stop sayin’ sure.

BONNIE: And, so, we went but like the whole time I just wanted to go to bed, I was tired and then I felt bad like not only was my time going out the window but I’m wasting his time

CLEO: You are way too nice.

BONNIE: So, then the waitress comes around and she’s like “Do you want another drink” and I’m like “No, thanks! I’m all set!” BUT WHAT DOES HE DO!? Orders anothers Jack and Coke.

EVE: Boo!

BONNIE: Trapped! But eventually the waitress sees that I needed some help, she brings the check, and he’s like holding onto it. He’s just like WAVING the check around like it’s the goddamn flag on the fourth of July. I honestly don’t even REMEMBER what he was talking about because I was way too focused on trying to think about making myself look like I was not looking at this check waiting for it to be paid so I could get the fuck out of there. At one point he put it in the pocket of his unbuttoned shirt and I still have NO CLUE why he did that but he did and just kept it there. So I thought after a bit he FORGOT it was there cause it was hanging out like a little lost puppy WAITING TO BE REMEMBERED. I made some sort of comment or joke that it was there and he was like “Oh, right” and pulls it out and then asks me about paying it.

GWEN: Wait for the whole thing?

BONNIE: Yeah. Cause he got dinner. Which like, sure fair- I don’t really care. I’m a strong, independent woman who can pay. But like let a girl offer first?

CLEO: Cheers to that.

BONNIE: So I was like yup. Fine. Whatever. We paid. Then when we walked out and some dude came running out after us and was like HEY HEY HEY- did you lose your debit card?

EVE: Your debit card?

BONNIE: Nope! You would think it would have been mine since I paid but it was not – it was his.

GWEN: Odd.

BONNIE: So, he’s having this whole moment with this guy like “Oh man how did that even happen? Woaaa, life is crazy!” Then the other dude was like “Okay yeah bye.” He walked me to my car and I completely avoided kissing him. I never talked to him again.

CLEO: Cute.

BONNIE: Totally.

MAN: (Coming over) Anything else for you ladies?

GWEN: (Pointing to her fake pocket) Should we get the check?

CLEO: Maybe we should get the check.

BONNIE: Can we get the check?

MAN: You can get the check, yes. (Chuckles, clearing glasses) You girls, you have some crazy stories-

CLEO: I’m sorry (Reading name tag) Anthony- were you eavesdropping?

MAN: I mean, no – it was just really easy to hear, being close by and all.

GWEN: You look familiar… are you on dating sites too?

MAN: (Quickly embarrassed) Why, well- what? Why?

GWEN: Are you?

MAN: I mean I have been, yeah. Hasn’t everyone?

EVE: Preach.

CLEO: Any luck?

MAN: Nah- the last girl I was talking to said I was too tall (Or short, depending on the actor) Which… that really sucks, because height really doesn’t matter, does it?

EVE: (Clearly drunk at this point) Height doesn’t matter?! Lemme – let me tell you a story about THAT if you think that height doesn’t matter! (Stands up) I was talking with this guy, Per… Perry? Peter… No- Percy- Percy! For sometime. He asked me out so I decided ‘sure, why not? I’ll go out with Percy- what else am I doing right now. Nothin! I’ll go out with Percy.’ Well there I was waiting for him outside the movie theater in my RED COAT because, well it was February, it was winter time and I texted him, because I got there first (Suddenly loud) LIKE THE RESPECTABLE PERSON I AM (Pause, takes another sip of her drink) Anyway. (Composes self) There I was, like this (poses as if she’s there, texting) and I said ‘Hey! I’m here. I’m in a red coat. Waiting for you. Outside. The. Theater.” (Aside) Cause that was the plan. And he said “Okay – good to know! I’ll be right there. I’m right around the corner.” So I waited (Pauses, as she says this next bit she begins to climb up onto the bar, slowly) I’m looking at my phone and I’m waiting and looking up, casually, and waiting- and then I hear a “Eve?” and I look up, and it’s him, all six feet and seven inches tall, and I go: “Hey-” (She gives a small wave) and then (With sudden intensity) HE SWOOPS DOWN AND GRABS MY FACE WITH BOTH HANDS LIKE I’M THE FUCKIN TREASURE TROVE HE’S BEEN SEARCHING FOR AND BEFORE I CAN EVEN SAY MY FUCKING NAME AND A HELLO. DOWN COMES HIS LIPS AND GOBBLES UP MINE LIKE I’M THE FOUNTAIN OF YOUTH OR SOME GOBLET FROM ANCIENT GREECE. HE TRIES TO SUCK MY SOUL FROM ME UNTIL HE FINALLY RELEASES HIS CLAWS FROM MY FACE AND I’M LIKE (meekly, coy) “Why hi there.” BUT REALLY, I’M LIKE WHAT THE HELL DID YOU JUST ENGULFE MY WHOLE FACE WITH YOUR TONGUE. WHAT TACTIC IS THIS? (Composing self) He takes my hand which I had to lift to my waist to meet his and we went to a bar-

CLEO: Wait – you went with him after that?

EVE: What was I gonna do?! (Dramatically) He flew down on his giant man wings and took me away.

CLEO: You just wanted free drinks didn’t you?

EVE: How dare you! Bah! It was an experience I had to see what was gonna happen.

BONNIE: So – then what?

EVE: We go – the bar is … so, so crowded. I mean it was a Saturday in February in Boston, what do you expect? But eagle eyes McGee finds a spot “THERE! IN THE CORNER.” He leads me through a sea of Boston’s finest and we sit. He’s all like “tell me all about you.” (With increasing alarm) So I’m like “hi – I’m Eve, I work in administration, blah blah blahhhhh,” and as I’m doing so he’s touching my knee and feigning interest and I’m all like “hahahaaaa and I like to do crochet, I used to work with the elderly” and then he’s inching closer and I’m like “What do you like? Do you know how to knit?!” and he’s like (whispering) “yeah” and THEN INTERUPTS ME BY PLACING HIS FACE ON MINE. The poor people next to us, I can only imagine they were thinking, ‘What the heck is going on here.’ I mean, who knows when they left, but they did at some point. Because that was it: talk, feigned interest, knee touch, repeat. Over and over. Until we finished our beers. Then we left the bar, walked around, and it was the same but talk, face caress, SWOOP DOWN- BECAUSE-MY-HEAD-BARELY-MET-HIS-ELBOW- kiss, repeat.

CLEO: (Sarcastically) Sounds like a workout.

EVE: (Laying down on the bar) I’m exhausted.

CLEO: (helping her off the bar with BONNIE) So, what then? How’d it end?

EVE: (Sleepily) Oh… um… I don’t know. I never saw him again. I just got out there real quick. (Perking up) Do you remember Jess?

BONNIE: Avenue Q Jess?

EVE: Yeah – so apparently he also messaged her the SAME message he initially sent me like two days after we went out.

CLEO: Classy.

EVE: Isn’t it?

CLEO: Dating isn’t always the worst. Sometimes the timing just sucks.

GWEN: Oh, like Darren?

MAN: Who’s Darren?

BONNIE: We all have a Darren.

MAN: I don’t have a Darren.

EVE: (Lifting head) I bet you do have a Darren, Tony.

MAN: Who’s Darren?

BONNIE: Who’s Tony?

EVE: (Pointing at MAN) HE’S TONY. It’s short for Anthony.

CLEO: Don’t mind her. She’s drunk.

GWEN: I’m sure he’s aware. He sees drunk people all the time.

EVE: Team Tony!

MAN: (Chuckles, not sure why she said that) Thank you?

CLEO: Anyway. Darren. He could have been “The One.” His first message to me will forever set the bar. It was a game of Scattergories. The game where you have a list of things and a letter and you need to write the thing beginning with that letter in under a minute. I was hooked. He wasn’t like any of the others. Then, we met in person and sparks flew. He walked me home, he didn’t have a coat and it was freezing. Then there were bowling dates and board game dates and cozy movie dates. Everything with him was so easy. Except for kissing. The first time he went to kiss me, I panicked because I realized too late what was happening and I wasn’t ready and I bit him. We laughed, he was sweet, and then was very clear about his kissing intentions from that point forward. God, he was a good kisser. But, this just happened right around the election… then, the whole world fell to shit and away he went. He will always be my “What if?”

EVE: (To MAN) See, Tony – we all got a Darren.

MAN: Please get off the bar.

EVE: (Grumbles) Do I gotta?

ALL: Yes.

BONNIE: (Helping EVE off) I use that way about Ben. But, don’t worry. That feeling disappears when you find the right one!

EVE: Here we go!

MAN: (Cleaning glasses) I’m guessing you found the one then?

BONNIE: I’m in LOVE!

MAN: Congrats – that’s great.

CLEO: The only one in a committed relationship and suddenly she’s the resident expert.

GWEN: Like six months ago she wasn’t juggling four men!

EVE: Teach us, oh wise one!

BONNIE: Woah! Calm yourselves. First of all, I wasn’t juggling four men. We were just-- hanging out. I was living my best life: no strings, no commitment, all the fun. Riddle me this: dating for over a decade and I find all of the good men AT THE SAME FUCKING TIME. Well, we drank. Bowled. Went to museums. The zoo. I was living my best life and bringing these men along for the ride. But, soon, they started weeding themselves out. One by one. The hot, nice guy, with whom I felt no chemistry. SWIPE LEFT! The dude who worked in my field, shared my friends, and would have complicated my life greatly should things have gone past the point of no return. SWIPE LEFT! The man who was basically me, but with a beard. Turns out, I cannot date myself. I’m A LOT. SWIPE LEFT! Then, there was one. A patient, kind, funny, smart, loving one. I don’t know. Who knows if it’s forever? But, right now, I’m happy. I’m really, really happy.

GWEN: Who would have thought one of our own would end up in a healthy relationship?

BONNIE: Not I.

CLEO: Do healthy relationships even exist?

BONNIE: Cleo!

CLEO: I’m kidding (Rolls eyes)

BONNIE: You know what, that’s it. Give me your phone.

CLEO: Why?

BONNIE: Because, there’s someone even better than Darren out there for you and I’m gonna prove it. (BONNIE takes the phone and continues to type frantically until her next lines)

EVE: (Beat) Anyone need another drink?

BONNIE: I think I’m just going to finish what I have. ​​

GWEN: I’m good with water.​​

CLEO: I don’t need another.

EVE: TONY! I CHANGE MY MIND! ONE LAST ROUND! Tequila shots!

MAN: You’re cut off.

EVE: Fair.

MAN: How about some water? (MAN brings water)

EVE: Listen, I don’t know what you heard. But we’ve been places, okay? Tony. Listen. We’ve been everywhere. To gas stations… and polygraphs… and France… (Louder) and right and left hands… and axe murderers and serial killers… (Louder and stands up with passion) and the goddam English Muffin pizzas that he wasn’t good enough for. One day, I’m going to find that right man who will be thrilled when I make my English muffin pizzas. And, I’m not going to settle for anything fucking less. (MAN begins to walk over with check.) We’re all not going to settle— (To the women) am I clear? (To MAN) I said, AM I CLEAR?

MAN: Here’s the check (Walks back to the bar, grabs a bucket of dirty dishes and glasses exits off stage)

BONNIE: (Looking up from phone) Yes! ​​​

GWEN: Crystal!​​​

CLEO: No settling!

GWEN: Well, on that note, I think it’s time we called it a night. (Everyone leaves money and begins to gather belongings to leave)

BONNIE: OHHHHH! ONE NEW NOTIFICATION!

CLEO: Ugh (rolls eyes)

BONNIE: A like AND message. Anthony, 28. “What’s your favorite work by Shakespeare?”

GWEN: Shakespeare? Okayyyyy…

EVE: WAIT! ANTHONY?

CLEO: Yeah?

EVE: (Gestures back to where MAN had exited. Connecting the fact that he is, also, ANTHONY) Him? Is it him? CLEO, MY GHOST QUEEN, I KNOW YOU HATE GHOSTS BUT IS IT THAT TONY THERE?”

CLEO: Wha- no! (Takes phone back from BONNIE) It’s not – wait maybe? Is that him? Is that his photo?

GWEN: He’s cute! Look at those eyes! I thought he gave you an extra smile tonight.

BONNIE: Cleo… are you blushing?

CLEO: No!

BONNIE: You are!

GWEN: You think he’s cute!

CLEO: Shut up!

EVE: SPARKS ARE FLYING HERE. CALL THE PAPERS.

GWEN: Wait—is he wearing a toga?

CLEO: Yes. That is 100% a toga.

EVE: Rock on, Tony!

GWEN: Toga-Man Tony

EVE: Bartender Tony!

BONNIE: (Sing-song) So, Cleo, what are you going to do?

(CLEO smiles and puts her finger to the phone. BLACKOUT)