#I HAVE MANY FEELINGS

[dapg-otmebytheballs]

The excitement on both their parts for "Him" returning to this plane of existence, Phil handing Dan the knife to make the blood sacrifice, Dan then saying He will require blood straight from the source (Phil) and Phil saying he will willingly give it, this isn't even the homoeroticism of an unwilling sacrifice, it's two equally fucked up dedicated devotees who are codependent and enablers to each other, it's the way they only fit together with each other because of the rough edges, it's the way Satan always looms behind the Lovers, the way He is present in the backdrop (here and in the Devil tarot card) but the lovers linked together are in the foreground, the Devil is only the symbol of a bond, what the image is about at the end of the day is the bond itself, anyway anyone else wanna go crazy about this with me?

#going deep over the crafting channel video bc why not #i have many feelings #dnp #dan and phil #dnp crafts #dan howell #phil lester #phan

[howdoyouwhiskit]

*deep breath* so I’ve been meaning to make a big post about House re:mobility aids and chronic pain treatment for a LONG time so here we go this is gonna be a long ride that probably won’t make a lot of sense in regards to a linear narrative so buckle up motherfuckers

Disclaimer: I am disabled, have chronic pain, and am an ambulatory mobility aid user. I have experience using a cane, forearm crutches, a rollator, and a walker. I understand everyone’s experiences are different. I am writing this from my personal experience with mobility aids which may influence some interpretations of things

Let’s start with the obvious one, House uses his cane wrong. They recognize this in canon. It isn’t simply a case of “oh the show writers were lazy and it’s never mentioned.” What I haven’t seen people discuss is that using a cane the way House does (in my experience anyways) fucking hurts. It isn’t comfortable at all. It feels awkward and clunky and at least personally within a few minutes of using a cane in that fashion my *entire body* hurts. Plus, it doesn’t even really help take the pressure off of my leg pain.

Given the all of him there’s two conclusions that I’d like to make about this (and remember this isn’t canon, just simply my interpretation as a disabled person):

It’s very obvious that House has Feelings about mobility aids. Society can often make people think that using mobility aids is a weakness. Admitting something is wrong. House very clearly doesn’t like to do either of those things. I personally have incredibly complicated feelings about mobility aids that I can’t even begin to put into words. I see myself in House in this regard.

I can’t help but think that him using his cane incorrectly is some fucked up form of self punishment. It’s been brought up in canon that House has a tendency to self harm in various ways. I don’t think that people realizing that him using a cane incorrectly could be related. For those who are unfamiliar, using any mobility aid (even a cane) incorrectly can cause damage. I do not claim to be a doctor but I imagine that House would be dealing with back and shoulder issues at minimum from using his cane the way he does.

The next thought I have is something I think about a lot. It’s clear House’s pain fluctuates, as it does for a lot of chronic pain patients. What I don’t see a lot of people talking about is realistically he could fluctuate mobility aids with the fluctuations of his pain. Yes, I understand there are limitations within his career as a doctor, but this is House MD were talking about there isn’t exactly always exact medical realism is there? I just can’t help but wonder, what would House’s life look like, if he let himself use something other than a cane?

I know there’s an episode where House does use a wheelchair for access to an accessible parking space, and I really really wish they expanded upon this more in canon. Personally, I think House needing to be (but not necessarily acting on it) a part time ambulatory wheelchair user makes sense.

I’ve read some fic/headcanons about House needing a wheelchair (Berber it be due to an advancement in disability or as an acceptance of his current disability) yet everyone talks about him using a shitty hospital grade chair. He’s a doctor who probably has great insurance plus a lofty department head paycheck. If House were in a position to have a wheelchair, he could very very easily access a top of the line custom made chair.

I understand the representation of the standard hospital chair often comes from a place of ignorance about custom wheelchairs, I really do. I just think that the concept of using a hospital chair permanently can cloud the judgement of if it’s truly a “bad thing” or not. Hospital wheelchairs are fucking uncomfortable and not easy to use. A custom chair, when built right, is none of these things.

Just, I’d love more House fanwork that embraces the idea of mobility aids. No, I don’t mean make House randomly decide “oh I’m gonna accept help now” and make him OOC. No, I mean let’s actually dive into House’s feelings about mobility aids, create some fanworks where maybe he works through some of his internalized ableism and self hatred and lets himself be accommodated. I hate seeing fic after fic that makes it seem like it’s some tragedy that House needs crutches or a walker or wheelchair. I want it to be normalized. Disability can be progressive and that’s just life. Yes, it’s upsetting. Yes, it can be sad to those involved. No, it doesn’t mean the end of the world.

Now I think it’s time to talk in regards to the treatment of his chronic pain, outside of the way he accommodates his mobility. I think that, while this is probably related to the writers wanting to stick to the “addicted to Vicodin” plot line, House’s pain management in the series, sucks, to put it lightly. I’ve been to multiple pain management programs (both at formal PM clinics and informal PM done by other specialists) and any doctor worth their salt would have had him on some sort of nerve pain medication and probably some form of muscle relaxer from the very beginning. While, yes, one could argue that House is on these medications and it’s just not mentioned, I really really don’t think that’s the case. You could also argue that he may have been offered these things, and simply refused them. This could very well be the case. However, that doesn’t erase the fact that these things could be helpful.

When House is off Vicodin, they have him substantiating off of exclusively ibuprofen. I’ve had chronic pain bad enough to need opioids treated with high doses of ibuprofen and in my personal experience, it doesn’t do shit. It just upsets your stomach and risks kidney issues and doesn’t actually help with the pain. The fact that just because he deals with addiction he doesn’t get proper pain management is BONKERS to me.

I understand that they were, within the shows canon, attempting to claim that at least some of the pain was psychological. Just because someone’s pain is psychological doesn’t mean you do not treat it. There are plenty of ways to treat psychological pain. Again, one could argue that House simply refused. Again, I’d say that you might be right.

You notice that I say that House very realistically could’ve refused various treatments that could make his life better. Just like how it is with his cane, I believe this is an effort at self punishment. If these efforts at self punishment are conscious or not is genuinely up to you. I personally view it as unconscious, but again, as I said in the beginning, I’m interpreting this the way I see things.

Anyways, just needed to get my thoughts out there, as a crippled person who’s been obsessed with House since before they realized that their chronic pain wasn’t normal. Since before they realized that the word disabled was something that could be applied to them.

Feel free to reply to this with thoughts or questions and y'all are more than welcome to DM me to pick my brain about this!

#i have many feelings #i have many thoughts #chomping at the bit wanting to scream #these have been in my brain for years thanks for asking #house md #hate crimes md #gregory house

[sinners-go-to-drink-the-wine]

rainbow bracelet. sword necklace. twin dad.

#i have many feelings #gvf #greta van fleet #papa k

[part-time-zombie]

Thinking about that scene in season one where abigail goes, "are we gonna reenact the crime? you be my dad, you be my mom, and you be the man on the phone", suggesting will be the one to cut her throat, with alana bleeding on the front steps and hannibal calling to set the father off with the two words "they know" and how mizumono was so close to her reenactment in all ways but one: she misinterpreted will and hannibals roles as her dangerous father and the mysterious man on the phone

#hannibal #i have many feelings #think about it

[herbgerblin]

First image is of Amber Gris and Oksana Kodeira. They are sitting casually at the shoreline of a sandy beach at sunset. On the left is Amber Gris, a short, stocky einarr woman. She has tan skin and scars on her arms and right side of her face. She is wearing an orange and dark teal wetsuit with the top part tied around her waist, An orange harness wraps around her waist and thighs. Her dark, greying hair, is braided to one side, revealing an undercut with a wavy pattern. Oksana is a taller, slimmer einarr woman. She has brown skin and long, curly, salt and pepper hair. She is wearing a blue captain's jacket, over a white blouse and tan breeches. They both look a little beat up, Oksana especially. Oksana looks over at Amber and says, "I think we're in charge."

The second image is of the pair, now viewed from some distance away. More of the ocean is visible, and the surface is illuminated with the lights of tens of tiny blink sharks, swirling around each other. The sky is warm with bright yellows and deep purples. Amber stares at the water in front of her and says, "Oh shit!"

What if we faced the first sunset of a new world, and we came to the dawning realization that we were the gods of that world, and we were childhood best friends?

#i am feeling particularly squishy y'all #i have many feelings #taz ethersea spoilers #taz ethersea #taz e #amber gris #oksana kodeira #my art #herbgerbart #the adventure zone #also i forgot how fun amber is to draw she is so shaped lmao

[limepigeon]

that line about Ortega saying he wasn’t sober for a month after Heartbreak keeps replaying in my head, lately especially how it would affect Chen (:

#fhr #fallen hero retribution #fallen hero #ortega #wei Chen #steelcharge #chargesteel #I guess #I just keep thinking about all the pain after heartbreak #the survivor’s guilt #the wasted opportunities of words gone unspoken #just augh #I have many feelings

[flowercrowns-n-punks]

This not to much of a character analysis, but also semi theory with a bunch of justt stuff not edited wrote on the spot.

But do you think , that sparrow isnt proud of Normal because Normal reminds Sparrow of himself when he was younger?

Do you think when Sparrow sees his beautiful baby boy it's like a blast to the past a cheery kid who has alot of love, who doesnt have a mean bone in their body, but will fight or harm if pushed hard enough, someone who will eventually crack. Something that reminds Sparrow so much of himself.

Sparrow doesnt want Normal to be anything like him. A messy codependent person who became a people pleaser? Someone who cant communicate how he used to.

He doesnt want Normal to be him, Sparrow doesnt want Normal to hide away.

Do you think Sparrow Oak isnt proud of Normal because he isnt proud of himself?

Sparrow who doesnt even realize he's not proud of himself. Doesnt know that he's ashamed of himself.

Sparrow puts this ridiculous standard of if Normal can be truly "Normal" then he'll be proud. Because that's one way to be proud you reach a goal and thats something you can be proud of?

Do you think a part of him realizes he's not a great father, far from the one he should be. Does Sparrow think that Lark is sometimes a better father then him and sincerely does question if Normal isnt his child?

Regardless Sparrow loves this child and when he loves Normal so much.

He doesnt know why he's not proud of Normal, he wants to be , so he tries pushing Normal to be "Normal" .

Sparrow can always be sure about one thing his love.

He will always love his brother,his father,his mother,rebecca,grant,terry,nick ,hero above all else.

Sparrow Oak Will Always Love Normal Above All Else.

He knows he'a not a good father, he's trying. He doesnt know alot of things.

Sparrow will always know love,to give love.

He's a Lovewolf afterall, even if he cant be that truly these days.

#dino stuff #dino rambles #dndads #dungeons and daddies #dndaddies #normal oak #normally swallows oak gsrcia #dndads sparrow #dndads normal oak #sparrow oak #sparrow oak garcia #character analysis #dndads theory #lark oak #henry oak #grant wilson #terry jr #nicky close #LOOK THE JIST IS IM A SPARROW OAK APOLOGIST #i have many feelings #and i could go on longer #sparrow oak apologist #he's trying his best #he's trying so hard #not edited #rambles

[before-whatgod]

does anyone else have a sinking feeling that things are moving too fast- why are we getting answers so quickly?

like lena is shady and working for Something- confirmed, jon- mentioned, celia being Celia- confirmed, gwen being a bouchard has significance- confirmed

i get that this is a sequel but it was supposed to be something that can stand alone, so where is the slow build up? is the all a distraction?

​i agree with everyone being suspicious of how freely the information is being given- we should know by now that all information comes with a high, life ruining, price

Johnny Simms what is Going On and what are you Hiding

#jon sims #martin blackwood #the magnus protocol #tmapg #tmapg spoilers #don’t get me wrong i Love this series #this is in no way a criticism #i have many feelings #many thoughts

[zukkaart]

The Gaang as… Forever by Noah Kahan

Zuko: I won’t be alone for the rest of my life

Sokka: I’ll build a boat for when the river gets high

Katara: And I'll meet a girl in the heat of July and I'll tell her so she knows

Aang: That I’m broke but I’m real rich in my head

Toph: That I broke a bone that never healed in my hand

Suki: So, when I hold her close, I might loosen my grip, but I won't ever let her go

#I have many feelings #about them #avatar the last airbender #atla #sokka #sokka avatar the last airbender #zuko #Katara #aang #toph #Suki #the gaang #we’ll all be here forever #forever noah kahan #atla incorrect quotes #incorrect atla

[myonmukyuu]

me: (is inactive other than art uploads)

someone: (mentions ayumu uehara)

me:

#i have many feelings #about ayumu yu and setsuna #AND SHIORIKO in the way their plot lines and themes overlap and converge #myon speaks #so manty feelings...

[apersonwholikeslotus]

I'm tired and I have a terrible headache but

Alfred trying his best to be a big brother to Jack and Liam (Oz and Zea) in modern day gives me ✨✨✨

they just............ it's complicated yknow, cause up until ww2 their relationship was basically

not to mention I LOVE the hc that Jack used to hate Alfred cause of the whole 'you accidentally determined my entire childhood' and even in modern day Jack is jealous of everything Alfred has bc 'he's the wayward son, why did he get the crown? couldn't it at least have been Mattie?'

Then I haven't read much on others hc about New Zealand but.... Liam aka William Richard Kirkland jr. has mixed feelings about all of his siblings? but like; Liam always thought of Alfred as some Bigger Than Life being yknow? He was there. but he existed in a far off place, and it just never really clicked that Alfred wasn't just a 'real person' but actually his older brother.

BUT ANYWAY; in modern day they just, Alfred tries, he really does and I'll fight people on this. And tbh? because Alfred wasn't around Jack and Liam still sometimes have a hard time thinking of him as their brother so it takes trying on their side to not treat him like just a friend.

the moment they're around each other (particularly without Canada) they just forget how to be siblings. Likes straight up, it's actually funny to watch them stand their awkwardly cause uhhhhhh,,,,,,,,, and Jack and Liam being so much younger than Alfred doesn't help either!!!!!!! But gosh, bro idfk what they do together to try to bond I just know they try. They try so hard cause they want to be siblings, and they want to pretend they can be comfortable around each other like if they grew up together. but man it's hard.

anyway happy thanksgiving if ur American.

#I have many feelings #and none of them are coherent #hetalia #anglo family #hetalia hc #aph america #hws america #aph australia #hws austrlia #aph new zealand #hws new zealand #aph canada #hws canada #listen #England even sits there watching them all like ??? what are they doing???? #but also #considering how I hc William's childhood went down #he's sitting there remembering growing up with Germania and all his germanic(tm) siblings #and then his dad dying and being shot back to isles #to have to try and get along with Scotland and Wales and eventually Ireland #and hes just #oof

[1lovepeace]

So, a few days ago, we recently got the first look at some screenshots of S5, which has gotten me even more excited about what is coming. But the last screenshot, with both Callum and Rayla possibly arguing, is one of the few that really caught my attention. Besides, seeing Rayla with Runaan's Bowblade. (Aww, my heart ❤️😭.) This could very well be the beginning origin of the intense, messy, overwhelming, and emotional conflict and topic that is about none other than Runaan for a variety of obvious, huge reasons. Considering how Runaan is just so much for both of them.

For Callum, freeing Rayla's family with dark magic, potentially as a last resort, is huge enough, but also know that one of the elves he would be saving is Runaan. This would not sit right with him at all because in his eyes, he'd be freeing the same elf who killed his stepfather, King Harrow, and made him and his brother orphans.

But for Rayla, it would be just as heavy and intense. Considering that she's willing to do anything and everything to free her family, also because of her deep history and connection with Runaan. Being that there's too many unresolved and unanswered moments between them from their last devastating interactions with each other from the disastrous fallout of the mission. There is a tremendous amount of emotional baggages, traumas, hurt, and pain that will be exposed at some point. Because in her eyes, Runaan was doing his job/civic duty as an assasin, but she might also remind Callum that his stepfather was not an innocent man either because he chose to take vengence into his own hands by killing Thunder Avizandum and giving the order to Viren to kill Zym who was still just an unborn egg, which was extremely monstrous. Resulting in another father being tragically taken away from his child and mate.

Imagine the heavy emotional yet honest and incredible dialogue we can have with them as this possible conflict unfolds. It would be phenomenal to see. Watch S5 unleash the raging tides of the oceans. I'm ready but not ready all in one. Let's Go Season 5🎉❤

#the dragon prince #tdp spoilers #rayla #callum #rayllum #runaan #tdp season 5 #book five: ocean #moonfam #i'm not ready 👀😭 #i have many feelings #bring on the water works 😭😭😭😭

[tripleaaaguardian]

me when the character i wrote to be doomed by the narrative is doomed by the narrative

#d2 #destiny 2 #d2 oc #so anyways virtue just shot her brother #and was promised to be wiped from existence i think #i don’t know what happening there #don’t look at the fact that i projected on them the most #i have a replacement hunter lined up for them but. yeah #he’s a dorky ass yeehaw man who eats bullets #sorry for rambling #i have Many Feelings

[backjustforberena]

what a little royal family:

#i have many feelings #many headcanons #and too much inclination to make stupid little gifs #WE COULD HAVE HAD IT ALL

[meraarts]

When Delissandro said “destiny has been designed” it illustrated how he sees himself, how he finally feels the importance he thinks he was destined for, and simultaneously showed that they had been played from the start and that this outcome was inevitable.

#i have many feelings #this season takes the dark tones of acoc to the next level #what if we weren’t unequivocally the goodies? #deli and karna happily falling to the dark side my beloved #conflicted Colin amangeaux and Raph my beloved #trw #the ravening war #trw spoilers #d20 trw #trw d20 #thane delissandro katzon #delissandro trw #d20

[nickneedsablog]

so i spent all night coming up with headcannons for the batfam so i decided to share some of my favs(this is also a non-hero au that im planning/working on, so they're just a rich family with mental illness)

bruce only wears pajamas unless he absolutely has to go somewhere. he usually wears stretched faded v-necks and fleece pants that have his favorite sports team logo on them

dick is the only one who looks like he could actually be bruce's kid

dick also only watches youtube veterans like smosh and gmm, with the occasional 'day in the life of (various martial artist and gymnasts)

jason has and pays for his own apartment, given it's a shitty rundown one bedroom apartment, but it's his and he's really proud of it

jason's eyes are hazel, most definitely

jason absolutely loves movies like clueless and heathers

tim definitely had a hero-worshippy crush on jason(until he tried to kill him)

tim was on the robotics team in middle school

the front bottoms was tim's number one artist on spotify wrapped(father was his number one song)

damian has heterochromia in one eye, a marbled blue and green while his other is just green

damian has a thing for stray animals, once he found a bird with a broken wing and forced alfred to help him nurse it to health

the family as a whole celebrates chrismukka, mostly cause bruce is jewish and all of the batbros never got to experience the true-to-the-movies christmas

like i said bruce is jewish but dick is romani, tim and jason don't follow any particular religion, and damian is kinda a mix between muslim and jewish, he follows the muslim diet but follows many jewish triditions

lastly while most of the family has a tense relationship with one or more of each other, they don't hate each other

#batfam #batfam headcanons #bruce wayne headcanon #dick grayson headcanon #jason todd headcanon #tim drake headcanon #damian wayne headcanon #i have many many more #i have many feelings #and they are all very strong