#I NEED TO SCRATCH. BUT I CANT

[cloud-ya]

the worst thing in stye is the itchiness

#I NEED TO SCRATCH. BUT I CANT #self insert #herrscher of the void

[sleepychaika]

hobbies include: sketching phos (particularly not having a great time). yeah this is just a sketch dump pretty much!.

the last 3 were done while listening to the most phos-core song ive ever heard: Low – More (discovered thanks to @punpuncake) (no seriously, google the lyrics. mind-blowingly accurate. angst.mp3.)

aaand a bonus sketch from an aggie.io session with friends – blindingly white next to the previous pics, so im putting it under the cut:

#phos #phos hnk #phosphophyllite #houseki no kuni #land of the lustrous #.txt #hnk #i honestly really am just. #a big fan of how it (phos). crumbles under all the pressure. literally. self-destructs is how i read it being described today #like it cant handle all of this #so it crumbles and melts away sometimes with a big pow in an explosion and sometimes kind of quietly #just letting its hands lose their form letting the alloy drip through the cracks #it scratches my brain like nothing else #for some reason #maybe it's how it isn't being addressed in the manga directly.... nobody says a thing about it it doesn't get acknowledged verbally iirc #but it very much happens regularly and no explanation is even needed yoy just understand #;_; #i want to hold phos #oh lmao *you #yoy is such a funny typo i instantly hear my inner reading voice's speech being reversed like in a ytp

[heph]

I bought Bloodweave candles from Planeshift Candles and I don't want them to know how much I love and obsess over their candles (we are mutuals) so now I'm yelling about it on tumblr instead of twitter SO!

Gale smells of like a . Sweet masculine cologne and Astarion smells citrusy (bergamot...) and I've been letting them perfume my room for the past few days and yall I'm just thinking about Gale's tent smelling like this 😭😭😭

#i think gale sleeps in his own tent and astarion joins him in the dead of night like a cat #you know when cats scratch at the door and wander into your room and cuddle on the bed yeah like that #bloodweave scented room i am so happy #also i basically bought gale took a sniff and went well. headcanon accepted NWISBSJSJ #UGHHHH i needed to yell about my candles theyre so wonderful i love them so much #okay. i got it out of my system. cheers ! #its currently oos so yall cant get it now but i def recommend it #im kind of a huge fan... #im so normal #okay thats all thank you for reading #bloodweave

[avacdavra]

Blessed be the Daughters of Cain

#i remade her from scratch whoops #and i made her tattoos!!! most of them are there anyways #got the hands and face/neck stuff and some arm/leg but ikkkkk i missed some she has so many and is literally always adding so!! fuck #sorry #ethel cain #preacher's daughter #american teenager #and crush #that one is two hairs i edited into one in paintnet shhhhhhhh i cant do meshes #also god bless TOOL mod for those bleacher shots lmao #how do people take not shit pics tho i cant ever get Good stuff like some mfs make Magic idgi but kudos to em #my sims #my cc #if i ever upload her tattoos for dl i can if anyone needs or wants em but! i am not great w making HQ shit they kinda grainy srry #uhhhhh #sims 4 #ts4 #the sims 4 #i do not know how to tag

[shellxrls]

THINKING about fucking modern!snow with the neighbourhood playing in the background ‘n he’s just rolling your hips for you with his big hands & making sure your pace matches the beat of the song.

#guys i’m so SICK #i need this man so bad you’d be scratching his buzz too and just panting in his ears and. IMM CANT DO THIS #😭😭 #coriolanus snow #coriolanus snow smut #;prompts #coriolanus snow imagine #coriolanus snow x reader #coriolanus snow x reader smut #tbosas #coriolanus x reader smut #coriolanus x reader #coriolanus snow fanfiction #modern!snow

[puppyeared]

When you backread through a fun conversation you had with someone for hours an angel gets its wings

#I was talking to my brother about Norman doors and I had fun in my UX class and he was telling me about demon cores and the trolley problem #in his class. AND I remembered to take my meds today so I can feel every cell in my body. i can feel the neurons rubbing together #and yesterday I infodumped about the specialists bullseye chart to crow and how it ties with witch hat atelier #WHICH I MANAGED TOGET THEM TK READ IM SO HAPPY. I MAKE SQUEALING GUINEA PIG NOISES EVERY TIME THEY TELL ME WHAT THEYVE READ SO FAR. AHH #i might not even be scratching the surface with witch hat there are so many themes i could not possibly fathom or go over my heasd #and thats what makes it so exciting there are so many spaces in between that you can fill with your thoughts and i. i #waves my hands around manically #for anyone interested in my insane ramblings. the bullseye chart is from are we all scientific experts now by harry collins #in my own words its basically saying everything we know about anything is a game of broken telephone #and it discusses how information gets lost in translation between experts and laymen including things that arent in control #one of the main points was how things that happen between experts are complicated including debates and findings #that you can only really understand thru research and experience in that field and cant be smoothly shared without it being reworded #and risking some of those key points. or even concepts that are hard to understand that cant be shared at all #like if you tried to tell me about how DNA works using words scientists are familiar with but i am NOT- i risk missing concepts that i need #to understand to know how it works on the level you understand. or i risk having it reworded and understanding it but not on that level #AND IT DOES TIE TO WITCH HAT THE WITCH AND NORMAL FOLK COMMUNITIES I PROMISE. ITS SO INTERESTING #anyway i spent hours reading back thru that conversation and i might as well admit it goes for almost every fun conversation i have #and it might be the 20mg of adderall in my body but i am in such a state of peace and love i have to verbalize it. ahh #yapping

[cremechees]

goodnight, kristen.

alternate versions with less (and no) flowers and no planets

#kristen wright #arknights #明日方舟 #lone trail #i literally cried when reading the epilogue so here u go #sleepy woman!!! #dog goes space #DO YOU GUYS KNOW HOW MUCH PAIN THIS PUT ME THROUGH #I STILL AM UNSURE ABOUOT THE FLOWERS IT LOOKS REALLY BUSY BUT I WANTED THEM TO BE IN THERE #my friend said theyre peonies. i cant tell #ALSO I SCRATCHED MY TABLET UP SO BAD SOMEHOW #DO I NEED A NEW ONE BUT IVE HAD THIS ONE FORE YEARSSSS I DONT WANNA GET A NEW ONE

[grimstrawberry]

small hs dump

#dave in that balmain hoodie from paris fashion week fall winter last january...... #wtfffff i need to paint him in all of those pieces #Homestuck #Dave Strider #Rose Lalonde #Terezi Pyrope #Nepeta Leijon #NepRezi #Scratch n Sniff #HumanStuck #Mituna Captor #Latula Pyrope #Mitula #My Art #man. #its 2024 and im still deep into homestuck #head in hands i cant do this anymore

[coatl-cuddles]

I started playing Sky and I'm in love...

#ugly ass screenshot studies #literally just because i cant draw clouds #and i need to learn #anywho this game scratches my brain in the best way #sky children of the light #my art #screenshot study #redraw

[jonny-b-meowborn]

Ohhhh god I got the motel scene everyone stay calm <- will never have a normal reaction to this scene

#thiss is my third time seeing it!!! oughf #going feral rabid wild #biting and scratching #i never have enough money to rent a room so idk how it goes when i have a normal place #but honestly. whatever it is i dont think anything gets better than jarod bringing me to his room from outside #because i cant be sleeping out there!!!!!!! #like i know that he actually just wants someone to help him get rid of the body or whatever but i prefer to se it as him being soft actually #and needing help with getting rid of the body #i cant imagine what is his excuse for taking you in when you rent a room lmao #i gotta check that someday #unless i can actually afford that rn honestly i dont remember how much is it #yeah no i dont have enough #and im trying not to get any bad karma this run i wanna be a good guy #gonna sleep on cardboard and have the man drag me inside like a normal person 👍 #road 96 #jarod road 96 #bee buzz

[bizarrescribblez]

ok everypony wish me luck i have an alarm set for 5am (3 hours from now .) because mini alan plushies are dropping again and i have to get him this time or else . if i reblog this tomorrow morning with a WE ARE SO BACK or ITS SO OVER you guys will know how successful i was

#I WANTED TO GET BOTH HIM AND SCRATCH . but im still debating like oughhg #i love them both but getting alan is ofc . a must and need and top priority + i cant spend a lot or i’ll feel guilty #cuz saving for moving + saving for other things + saving for bday presents cuz SO MANY #PEOPLE IN MY LIFE HAVE MAY BIRTHDAYS?? ITS CRAZY #anyways PLEASE ALAN PLUSHIE YOU WILL BE MINE. #bizarre.ramblez

[alteredsilicone]

why can you use transference on necramechs... they predated warframes but they're not warframe replacements

waddahell

is it because they have "sentient pulse disablers" which probably are void related (since otherwise sentients would have easily adapted to something technological)

honestly if i start thinking about necramechs my brain is gonna break

#wf tag #warframe is a bit iffy on what counts advanced enough for sentients to adapt to lmfao #tenno are void powered biomechs which is why they are direct counters #grineer use archaic ballistic weapons so sentients cant adapt to that #corpus logically should be the most vulnerable #as were orokin #so im just scratching my head here #what is the cutoff for technical complexity that the sentients start adapting to #also why is it something technically complex specifically #why am i asking warframe lore questions #need to draw more old man yaoi and think less

[the-kipsabian]

idk man

that doesnt really look like a face of an innocent man i trust is all im saying

#trying to finish ng+ tonight to get my mind off of things #was aiming to be done before dynamite but probably not happening considering i wasted so much time on side objectives #literally wasted cause the one i needed to do i cant finish on ng+ so. everythings pointless lmao #but yeah look at him. thats not a face i trust tbh #the whole wake/scratch shift thing is still so interesting to me tho like. you can absolutely tell. not just by the look but the vibe #how they talk. how they act. how they interact. its so good for my little observer heart #anyways back i go i just thought this was funny idk #alan wake #aw2 spoilers #night is an absolute mess on main

[trippol-threat]

i want to see professor squidge please!!!!!

YES OF COURSE ANY TIME

Okay so I love her and she's adorable

This was her on the way home

Last night she was super duper sleepy and sleeping on me all the time

And this is her this morning. Apparently waking me up at 530am was very tiring for her

#professor squidge #i will always provide pictures of my new baby #not pictured: the screaming every time she cant see me; my hands covered in scratches; being woken up every hour #oh also she chases her own tail and that is HILARIOUS #okay to rb #in fact pls rb #everyone should see my prof #cats of tumblr #kitten #oh also i was sad this hadnt gotten any attention. wanna know why?? #didnt fuckin post it #saved it to drafts like an IDIOT #so anyways baby missed out on 6+ hrs of attention we all need to make up for papas mistake

[elnotwoods]

what’s a bit of workplace punishment between two sapphics?

no women in kinnporsche? that’s okay, hand drawn is fine too

#they’re sapphics your honour #i cant keep looking at this anymore #it needs to go out into the word and leave me be #i have not been drawing from scratch like this for months and months and it show #literally almost cried and gave up #it is what it is #genderbend kinnporsche #female kinn #fem!kinn #female porsche #fem!porsche #kinnporsche but make it sapphic #kinnporsche #kinnporsche the series #kinnporsche fanart #el draws

[overleftdown]

4th and final part to my farleigh analysis. most of this one is just ranting, since all of these scenes are fairly self-explanatory. i am plagued by thoughts and emotions.

[1:12:45] farleigh: i wouldn't do this! elsbeth: james is very upset. farleigh: you know that i... why would i do this!? elsbeth: i don't know! farleigh: i swear to god, this has to be a- elsbeth: enough! farleigh: there must be some kind of mistake, here.

oliver really did hit farleigh where it hurts, i suppose. farleigh remains committedly in control of himself; he knows when and where to say something, how carefully he needs to act in saltburn. he toes a line, but he somehow manages to stay on the right side of the cattons' affection. this, however, was a breach of that line. oliver attacked the cattons' trust in farleigh, in their confidence of his ability to remain compelling and non-threatening. maybe oliver was expecting this particular offense to be the end of their good graces towards farleigh, although it clearly wasn't.

[1:37:17] felix: i mean, the idiot! he had to have known that dad went to school with the chairman. venetia: i mean, talk about biting the hand. and mum and dad would give him anything he asked for. felix: yeah, well. obviously, he got sick of asking. venetia: that's ridiculous. he's more spoilt than we are. felix: i mean, come on vee, you have to admit. it's a little bit dark, him having to go to mum and dad with a beginning bowl. venetia: oh, boo-fucking-hoo. felix: already yes, fine, it was incredibly fucking stupid.

again, the irony of this situation is that farleigh really would never do this. it's interesting, how nobody questions it.

i also think it's important that venetia assumes the money would be for farleigh himself, and felix neglects to correct her. the conversation he references by specifically saying "begging bowl" had everything to do with farleigh's mother. the lack of familial privilege farleigh has is, also, a supposed racial bias. felix also neglects to mention this. the idea that farleigh could be implicitly discriminated against within saltburn is so deeply uncomfortable, so offensive, that felix can't even mention it as an objective discussion he had with farleigh. that's not surprising, though.

[1:25:30] oliver: have they seen you, yet? farleigh: not yet. oliver: yeah, they'll go ballistic. farleigh: i doubt it. they invited me. oliver: ohhh. farleigh: mmm... mmm. god, the look on your face. oliver: they can't have invited you. farleigh: oh, oliver. you'll never catch on. this place? you know, it's not for you. it is a fucking dream. it's an anecdote you'll bore your fat kids with for christmas. olivers once in a lifetime, handjob on a hay bale, golden big boy summer! and you'll cling onto it, and comb over it, and jerk off to it, and wonder how you could ever... ever, ever, ever get it back. but you don't get it back. because your summer's over. and so you... oh... you catch a train to whatever creepy doll factory they make olivers in. and i come back here. this isn't a dream to me. it's my house. so whatever happens, i always come back. try harder next time, baby.

god, this monologue. so much for me to chat about.

"this place? you know, it's not for you." farleigh has this obsession with the fact that oliver is an outsider. it's intentional, it's instinctive, because farleigh is an outsider all the same. it's strange, though, because this is still farleigh's family. this is his aunt, his uncle, his cousins, and the house he's lived in for at least a couple years. he shouldn't, reasonably, be an outsider. yet, he's treated as one. something kills me about how hard farleigh is fighting for a place to belong. and sure, the money, the lavish lifestyle, it's all great. i don't disagree that farleigh is motivated by the fact that he's never experienced the life of lesser wealth that he fears so much. but there's also so much love for felix and venetia and i'm sure, for elsbeth and james.

this makes the final portion of farleigh's monologue so relevant. this is that kind of foreshadowing where a character implies a happy ending before receiving the opposite of that. farleigh says "this isn't a dream to me. it's my house. so whatever, happens, i always come back." and he... doesn't! he does not come back, at least at the invitation of elsbeth or james. this was a dream for him, too. oliver just had to prove it, how easy it is to destroy everything farleigh has worked for since arriving at saltburn. the pocket in time that farleigh runs to when he doesn't want to go back to america and his mom.

[1:35:58] (they find felix's body, in the maze). farleigh and venetia destroy me, in this scene. the way farleigh reaches for her hand and pulls her into him. at 1:36:56, he pulls her into him again. they cling onto each other. sometimes i think about how much farleigh must have loved them and grieved them alone. how in the world do you cope with that?

[1:37:12] (pre-curtains closing) it's the way farleigh glances to felix's empty chair. it's the way that, even now, it's farleigh sitting next to felix's ghost. and he's trying his hardest, in this moment, to be very english about his emotions. great effort.

[1:39:28] farleigh: oh, my god. may i be excused, please? james: no. we haven't finished lunch. farleigh: the lunch is cold! what, you want me to just eat it like nothing's happening? elsbeth: what else is there to do, darling? farleigh: anything! anything! james: farleigh! will you be quiet!? sit down and eat the bloody pie! just eat it! eat it and shut up! eat the bloody pie! you're not the only person here with feelings. none of us wants your bloody american feelings.

i don't know if there's any singificance to this, but the same moment that farleigh cracks is the same moment that the footman behind him cracks.

of course, english repression vs american... normal...ness. "none of us wants your bloody american feelings" is, again, such a strong indication of how differrent farleigh is. he's family, yes. but he's different for a multitude of reasons. i also find it heartbreaking, how elsbeth speaks to him in this scene. she is visibly trying so hard to keep herself together and maintain a calmness while speaking to him. i really do wonder how close they were.

[1:40:10] farleigh: what the fuck are you still doing here? what, does no one else find it weird? no one else finds that weird? oliver: i wouldn't throw stones if i were you, farleigh. farleigh: excuse me? venetia: please, stop. james: what is he saying? farleigh: i, i have no idea. oliver: what i'm saying is, i would feel guilty, too. farleigh: guilty? oliver: if i was the one racking up lines on the night that someone died. farleigh: fuck you. oliver: that's not a denial. james: is that true? search farleigh's room. farleigh: no- james: get out. farleigh: no, wait- elsbeth: what's happening? farleigh: aunt elsbeth? elsbeth? james: don't you dare look at her. get out. i won't mention to this to the police, but that's all you'll get. nothing more, ever again.

and here is all it took to ruin farleigh. archie's acting in this scene is so potent it's kind of vomit inducing. the way he fidgets with his sleeves, the way he flinches and his lip quivers. farleigh is buried in a sweater. now, more than anywhere else, he looks so young.

for the first time in this movie, farleigh refers to elsbeth as his aunt. gah. not that elsbeth seems any more motherly than what i imagine farleigh's own mother to be, but goodness, he's begging for affection. i realize there's not much else to say about this scene other than how heartbreaking it is. i'm basically writing this post for my own self benefit; i gotta rant somehow! i wonder if farleigh did feel guilty for his actions that night. if he regrets sticking to his own agenda, avoiding felix and the rest of his family like the plague. if he regrets the competitive nature of it all; how quickly his need to be accepted took precedent over the genuine connection he had with felix. there's something so hopeless about learning how to lie.

i think, out of all the cattons, farleigh understood how much it all mattered. the money, the ease of summer, the companionship during school. just like oliver, he knew how to work, in his own way. farleigh knew what it felt like to be loved and ignored by the cattons, and by his own family in america. rararararararara.

#saltburn 2023 #saltburn #farleigh start #oliver quick #lordy lord #lordddd #this took a toll on my life tbh #i spent a lot of time doing this #just had an itch i needed to scratch #i guess #farleigh start you will always be famous #i can't lie cuz he's actually so real #as soon as archie madekwe started talking about farleigh as a character #wooo boy i cant help it #i'm keeping kin lists alive and well #he's on there #fucking #fuck #womp womp