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bookishofalder · 3 years

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Night Changes [Six]

Summary: In which Poe and the reader recover, and feelings intensify. A mission brings them closer, and memories give us insight into their pasts.

Warnings: Language, violence, smut, fluff, emotions, angst. Everything you came for.

Poe was wandering aimlessly, his feet scuffing along the dirt road as he kept his eyes focused downward, his cheeks stained with tracks of dried tears. His unruly curls were falling into his face, somewhat shielding his eyes from the lowering sun as he ventured around his neighbourhood. When another sniffle threatened, he cleared his throat aggressively and choked it back.

His father told Poe that it was more than okay to cry, as much as he wanted and for as long as he needed. It wasn’t that he was ashamed of crying and showing his emotions, nor was it why he hadn’t yet gone back home. It was just...he was tired; of crying, of feeling so enormously miserable. And now that the funeral and life celebration was over, it felt suddenly very final. Like the second he walked through the door tonight, it would hit him that she was never coming back.

That she was lost to the stars, forever.

It still didn’t feel real, not fully, and so when they were making their way home a short while ago, Poe froze up when they turned the corner onto their lonely stretch of road. He couldn’t bring himself to continue walking, and after a few moments, his father had glanced around to find Poe standing several feet back. A look of sorrow and understanding had crossed his face before he pulled him in for a tight hug and suggested that he take a walk. Told Poe to take his time and come home when he felt ready, that he’d be waiting up no matter the time. Dad was good like that, never pushed but always seemed to understand, to tell Poe he was seen.

He was on a street not too far from home now, the sun low and golden and the temperature easing just enough, though Poe was still sweating a little. He was considering removing his sweater when a voice to his left cut through the air very suddenly.

“Duck!”

He did, not needing to be told twice even though he wasn’t sure what he was avoiding. Glancing up, Poe saw a large red ball fly over his head and instinctively reached up and caught it before it could get too far. When he looked around, standing back up, a boy that looked to be his age was running toward him, his eyes crinkled in a friendly way as he pulled a face that conveyed his apologies.

“Wow, sorry!” The boy said, coming to a halt in front of Poe and panting. He pointed at the ball, “I was aiming for my sister’s head, but I’m not the best kicker.” He admitted, and Poe smiled at the boy’s candour.

“That’s okay, you missed me too,” He held the ball out for the boy, but before he could hand it over a girl, who looked to be a couple of years younger, came barreling over. Her face scrunched in anger that Poe wanted to think was adorable, but it was also kind of scary.

That was the first time Poe saw you.

“Charlie mommy said not to do that anymore!” You shouted, ripping the ball from Poe’s hands and then aggressively tossing it toward your house. It bounced until it hit the duracrete side, rolling to a stop. “You’re a massive-“

“Hey, don’t swear in front of-oh,” The boy paused and looked back over at Poe, who was standing somewhat awkwardly as he watched the siblings exchange. “Sorry, what’s your name?”

You were both looking at him now, your faces friendly and open. “I’m...Poe. Dameron. Poe Dameron.” He mumbled nervously, suddenly feeling too tired and hot. His face flushed a little from the heat and embarrassment, and he just knew you were both going to think he was a real loser.

“Poe Dameron, nice to meet you, buddy! I’m Charlie and this pipsqueak-“ The boy-Charlie- broke off to ruffle your hair as you rolled your eyes, “Is my sister (y/n). We’ve seen you around before, you must live close.”

Poe nodded, “Yeah, just over by-“

“Why are you dressed like that?” You asked suddenly, a hand shooting out to pluck at his black sweater.

Poe hesitated, unsure of how to explain without immediately scaring both of you off. You were surprisingly serious for a little kid, your big eyes sweeping over his face and taking in his red eyes, before again taking in his outfit.

But when you looked back up at met Poe’s nervous gaze, your lips tugged up ever so slightly in a way that...well, it made him trust you. He didn’t know why, but he looked between you and the equally friendly face of your brother and didn’t sense a shred of hostility or insincerity.

“My mom just died, today was,” He took in a shuddering breath, the words heavier to admit than he ever could have imagined, and yet just saying it out loud was surprisingly freeing, “The funeral. I was just...I wasn’t ready to go home yet, I guess.”

Poe had stared at your bare feet as he spoke, focusing on the wiggling toes because he didn’t want to see the pity on your faces after spending the last few days receiving nothing but pitying looks from everyone he’d ever known. He was entirely caught off guard when he heard you give a little gasp, then launched yourself into him, your arms wrapping around his waist and pulling him into an unexpected, firm hug.

“Poe that’s awful,” You whimpered, peering up at him with tears eyes.

Poe felt it then, the shift inside of him that he wouldn’t realize for a very long time was his universe colliding with yours, the staggering sensation of his soul meeting your soul for the very first time. He was too young to know this, of course, but the intensity of his feelings was felt nonetheless. The first thing he did recognize was that he really, really wanted to prevent you from looking so sad.

Charlie’s hand clapped down on his shoulder as Poe gazed down at you in surprise, only seconds had passed, “We’re really sorry about your mom, Poe,” He smiled sadly as he spoke, shaking his head a little. After a moment his gaze shifted to you, “Kid, he’s already warm! Give him some space!”

You almost seemed surprised at your reaction to Poe’s news, though upon hearing Charlie’s admonishment, you quite suddenly jumped away from him, as though you had been electrocuted, all while furiously apologizing to Poe.

You were so adorable and sincere that Poe laughed. For the first time since his father had come into his room and kneeled next to the bed with the most heartbreaking expression to tell him his mother had died, he laughed. Full bellied, the muscles in his face stretching upward into a wide grin, Poe Dameron laughed. There was only a slight pause before you and Charlie joined in, your pealing giggles filling his ears as Charlie held his shoulder and stars, did it ever feel good.

Poe was still just a kid, even though his mom had died and he’d had to suffer through heartbreak that no child ever should, he was at heart still only ten years old. Yet as he stood on the front lawn laughing with the Horn children he was overwhelmed by the feeling of home he found in you both. He knew this was the start of something incredible.

Charlie gestured toward the ball once the laughter began to fade, “Do you have to go home yet, or do you want to play with us for a bit, Poe?” Charlie asked, gesturing toward the ball.

You were nodding eagerly next to him, and with a glance at the sun to confirm it wasn’t yet too late to stay, Poe smiled at his new friends, his eyes meet yours as he answered. “I’d love to.”

————-

Your hips swayed lazily to the music as you eased your way through the evening crowd gathered at Maz Kanata’s cantina. Poe kept close behind you, his face relaxed but his eyes flicking carefully around the room, watching for signs of trouble, his senses on high alert. He kept his face neutral, holding back the frown he found himself tempted to make as strangers' eyes fell down your body when you passed them, drinking in your curves.

You found an empty booth and sat, propping your legs on the seat across from you, the picture of ease and comfort when you smiled up at Poe. He tried to mimic your relaxation, but you’d always been much better at acting a part than him when it came to the cause you both fought for. He had trouble pretending to not be on edge, and so he kept close to you. Not just for safety, but also to be considered a protective partner, rather than an undercover Rebel.

With a small wink, you patted the seat next to you to give Poe permission, that you knew he needed, to sit close to you. He flung an arm behind you, resting against the booth seat, and spread his legs wide in hopes of appearing at ease. Your hand patted his knee briefly and he had to actively work at not tensing under the heat of your touch.

You sat in silence together for a few minutes before Jess Pava cut through the crowd to join you, her hands holding four drinks carefully that you jumped up to help her with. Your body leaned over Poe’s as you plucked two drinks from the fellow pilot’s hands, and he had to take a small breath to steady himself due to your proximity. Stars.

‘Your system is entirely flushed of the pollen, Commander. We ran the extra tests you requested and they came up the same as the previous.’

‘But I feel so...you know what, never mind. If you say it’s gone, then I believe you.’

You handed him his drink and he raised it in thanks, then pretended to take a sip. None of you would be drinking this evening, because you were working but it would have looked suspicious if you’d all sat down in the cantina without them.

“Thanks, Jess,” You sat back down, your thigh only inches from Poe’s. He watched Jess toss you a flirtatious wink and rolled his eyes in amusement as you flushed in response. She had always loved to flirt with you.

“Well, I’m not sure when exactly our friend will arrive but he can usually be counted on to be on time when there are free drinks.” Jess rapped her knuckles on the table, her eyes drifting around the room casually. She’d been based at an outpost nearby Takodana and was the lead on the current intel handoff that required Poe and you.

You scoffed, “I don’t care if he’s late. But if his intel isn’t as good as he claims, I’m shooting him before I ask questions.” Out of the corner of his eye, Poe saw your fingers twitch on your shooting arm; as though you were tempted to pull the hidden blaster from your backpack.

Poe nodded in agreement, “Not that it isn’t lovely to see you, Jess.”

She laughed as Poe grinned, sitting back into her seat to get more comfortable while waiting for the contact to show up. Each of you was dressed to look like casual, tired travellers. In various shades of khaki, Poe wore a light linen shirt tucked into his pants, his blaster hidden in the waistband at his lower back, his regular boots exchanged for a worn pair of travelling boots that were anything but comfortable. You were wearing the same light linen, though the tunic you wore was tighter fitting, tucking into loose-fitting shorts that hit mid-thigh, the look revealing a lot more skin than he was used to seeing.

It was distracting, you were distracting to him, especially as you sat so close to him that he could feel your body heat, smell your shampoo.

Poe and you had been released from the med bay two days before this mission on Takodana. He’d returned twice to demand further testing, unbeknownst to you because he wanted to be certain he would never hurt you again. He’d woken up feeling pretty spectacular, that first day after receiving what Tahla told him had been special transfusions to clear out the pollen. His friend had said it would feel intense, the new clarity in his mind, because he’d spent nearly a month unknowingly gripped by a fog that only increased each time Poe and you touched.

And stars, it was true how free and open his mind felt now. It was like losing a large amount of weight all at once, and with his newfound clarity, he thought there would be a substantial decrease in his attraction to you-enough, that is, to stop his thoughts from wondering and his heart rate to increase every time he so much as looked at you, but that hadn’t happened. Instead, it was like the exact opposite had occurred; free of the effects of the pollen, Poe was no longer confused or overwhelmed by his feelings, rather they had all seemed to be glaringly obvious.

Now, instead of looking at you and remembering what had happened after the pollen exposure, Poe simply became distracted because you were beautiful. Equal parts protectiveness, adoration and attraction surged within him anytime he glanced your way now, and it didn’t feel wrong or confusing any longer. There had been a few times now where you’d looked at him similarly, and he wondered, or rather, hoped, that maybe you were feeling the same.

With a low sigh, you shifted next to Poe, recrossing your legs as your feet rested on the seat opposite, and Poe’s eyes automatically swept over your form. He sensed your apprehension and impatience and let his hand fall forward slightly, sweeping some of your loose hair away from your neck. His belly warmed when he saw you shiver a little.

Pulling his gaze away from you, he glanced around the room once again. Maz Kanata’s was a neutral territory, which meant that coming in disguise was as important as it was to keep your blaster nearby. The place was filled with a mixed bag of smugglers, spies, travellers and more. There was no telling who could be in the room and with you at his side, Poe was hyper-aware of the risks that being members of the Resistance held and he was as eager to leave, with the intel, as he knew you were.

“Oh, here’s our green friend now,” Jess’s voice pulled Poe from his thoughts and he glanced around, spotting the Twi’lek man approaching their table with an easy-going smile.

“Fucking finally,” You murmured to Poe, your warm breath brushing against his neck and raising goosebumps along his skin.

He was starting to wonder if you were doing these things on purpose, now.

Medical Bay Two Days Prior

You awoke somewhat rapidly with a gasp, almost sitting up as you came to, only a hand on your shoulder that seemed to be expecting the reaction cautioned you to remain laying down. You allowed your body to relax, your eyes still shut.

A distant and possibly familiar voice was speaking to you quietly, though you couldn’t make out the words yet.

To wake yourself up properly, you pulled in a deep breath and focused on yourself for a moment, noticing how good you felt, your body light and pain-free. And your head...it felt so clear.

The memories came back, then, of walking down the hallway toward the hangar with Poe, his hands touching you more and more like he couldn’t help himself. How good those hands felt until each of you was falling to the ground in twisted versions of ecstasy. It had been painful, terrifying, and you remembered clinging to him both in panic and for safety as you screamed, Temmin appearing and then it all slips away, the last thing you could recall was the stinging sensation in your arm. It must have been a quick dose of bacta, enough to keep you from dying even though you still passed out from the overstimulation of everything.

As you thought of Poe, panic began to rise within you and you heard the resulting increase in your nearby heart rate monitor. Had they been able to save him, too? Or had he...oh, what if he-

“Major, relax, you need to calm yourself. You are alright. Commander Dameron is safe as well-yes, that’s right, breath for me, Poe is safe, good, good.” The voice next to you was soothing, the firm hand on your arm rubbing up and down gently as your heart rate decreased.

Poe was safe. Your Poe.

And then the clarity hit, no longer blurred by your panic over Poe’s condition, and the monitor picked up the brief spike as your mind caught you up. It was like...the pollen had mangled and warped your feelings, pushing back everything that mattered most to focus on what your body wanted, what it wanted your bodies to do. It left you both in need, even after you worked through the initial exposure, and you hadn’t even realized it. It was like a filter on your brain, not blocking out the real stuff, but keeping you more and more focused on Poe in a sexual way the more you touched, until it all became too much.

But now you could feel everything real and it was almost too much to suddenly bear. You knew you’d forgiven him, that you’d each begun repairs on your broken friendship, falling back into a comfortable pattern...but stars, it was so much fucking more, wasn’t it? You were completely-

With another gasp, you opened your eyes before the realization could send you into a panic, and the Healer next to you prevented you from sitting up again, coming into focus now as you adjusted to the sunny medical room. You saw a privacy curtain around your bed, then looked at the person standing over you.

You blinked in surprise as you gazed at the Healer because you knew him.

“Tahla!” You cried out in delight, and he let you move finally so that you could pull him down to you for a bone-crushing hug. He laughed, a rich baritone he definitely hadn’t had when you last saw him on Yavin-4 years ago.

“Hey kid,” He said, pulling back to gaze down at you with a wide smile, “Welcome back. How do you feel?” He searched your face in a way that told he was there in a professional capacity as much as a friendly one.

“I...well, shit,” You stammered, struggling to sit up. He helped you, adjusting your pillow behind your shoulders and then pulling your blanket up a little. “My head feels so clear, I can’t believe it.” He nodded knowingly as you gazed up at him, looking at his Healer uniform, then to the medical droid next to him waiting for instructions.

Noticing your shift in focus, Tahla pointed in question to the edge of your bed and you nodded, scooting your legs out of the way so that he could sit. He settled, then took one of your hands into his own. “It’s been a few years, hasn’t it?” He asked you softly, “I’m sorry about that. And for not being able to make it to Charlie’s funeral, either.”

“You don’t owe me any apologies, Tahla Martell, you should know that,” You replied quietly, squeezing his hand, “Not after everything you’ve done for me.”

He sighed, nodding his understanding as you both remember your last few months on Yavin-4. He then glanced back at you and despite the faint laugh lines around his eyes, the more dense peppering of facial stubble, you thought he looked much the same as he had all those years ago. Based on how his eyes were roving over your face, you believe he was thinking the same thing.

“I suppose it goes without saying, but I am a Healer now, a specialist actually. In foreign contaminants. My team was responding to the General’s request for assistance, but when I saw your name and Poe’s name on the patient files, I decided to come myself,” He explained, tossing you a little smile that told you he just knew you’d get yourself into trouble someday. You grinned back at him. “The Healer’s here put you both into temporary medical comas, and once I arrived yesterday I was able to complete the transfusions required to clear your system of any and all lingering toxins.”

Frowning now at the memories of the last month, you shook your head, “Tahla, I really fucked up on this-”

“No,” He interrupted softly, and you felt yourself flush a little from the sincerity of the look he was giving you. “You didn’t. That pollen is one of the more lethal ones known to us in the field. The fact that you were both able to survive this long...and once you were exposed, you were both technically compromised. The pollen didn’t want you to report the exposure, that wasn’t a lapse on your part,” He paused, thinking over his next words carefully as you waited patiently with your guilt-ridden heart sitting in your throat. “One could argue that had there not been a delay in your return to base, meaning the three-day travel, it could have been more likely you’d have reported what happened. But because you and Poe were exposed together, worked out the initial effects together, and subsequently remained within close proximity during the travels home, there was absolutely no chance of either of you making that correct call.”

You let that linger for a moment, closing your eyes as the build-up of emotion swelled. It wasn’t your fault. You didn’t fuck up. Though, you couldn’t help but wonder how far-reaching the pollen’s hold on you was. When you opened your eyes, Tahla was watching you closely with an expectant expression, as though he sensed the direction of your thoughts.

“Did-did it affect everything I did and said? That P-Poe-?”

“No, just the more, shall we say, primal parts,” He said thoughtfully, “I read the report you did submit, and I found it interesting. You stated the trip home was fairly uneventful. Was that true, to your recollection?”

“Oh,” You thought back to those three days after you’d made up with Poe. “It really was.”

Tahla bobbed his head in thought, “It’s unique, I think, that exposure happened to two people who had a pre-existing friendship beyond being mere teammates. At least in our reports over the years. Do you recall wanting to touch Poe, but not allowing yourself to do so?”

You stared at Tahla in surprise, “Yes, right after we rolled through the bush that they were growing from. Why?”

He ran a hand over his jaw, brows furrowed in thought. “I think the pollen had its work cut out for it, getting you both to ignore your instincts to protect one another. If you were fighting it that early, well, that’s the first time I’ve heard of such a thing,” He tapped over his lips now and you could practically hear his scientific brain whirring away. “Even the timeline here is beyond anything I’ve ever come across. You were both able to resist initially, then worked the first dose out of your system. But when you came back to base, you were still fighting against the urges and that is...something else. The more you touched, the harder it was not to touch, am I right?”

You wanted to feel more embarrassed at the questions, but you were too caught up in what he might be getting at to give a damn. So instead, you nodded, “Harder not too, but felt more dangerous to continue.”

“I think the preexisting friendship played a major role here, it allowed you both to walk around nearly for a month when you should have been succumbing within a day after the initial-hold on, what symptoms have you had since you’ve been back, other than what we’ve discussed?”

He gave you an intense look then, and now you flushed a lot because you were hoping not to have to talk about the dreams. “I was uh, having dreams. Nightly, or like really early in the mornings. They woke me up.” You bit nervously at your cheek.

Tahla, ever the Healer at heart, got straight to the point. “You were having sexual dreams that woke you up because you orgasmed?”

You pulled your hand from him, covering your face, “Yeah, but it was like only a second or two of relief. And then I’d be worked up all day...tried, you know, before bed to see if it helped, but nothing did.”

“Huh,” Tahla grunted, going quiet for a few minutes as he thought. You suddenly felt very grateful you were having this conversation with him and not any other Healer’s. Stars. “Remarkable.”

You peeked out from behind your hands, “Tahla, are you saying that because Poe and I care for each other so much, we were able to fight against the pollen to a degree? That what happened the other day was the result of too much touching after so much time resisting?”

“That’s exactly what I’m saying, or theorizing at this point,” He replied, and you huffed out a breath. This was too much to think about. He seemed to sense your exhaustion and reached out to grip your shoulder. “Back to the initial question, though, you were both still yourselves underneath the underlying desire to, well, you know.”

He laughed a little shyly then and you smirked, quirking a brow in surprise. “Oh now he gets shy,” You giggled, “Stars, Tahla.”

“I know,” He agreed, laughing along with you, “I suppose it doesn’t make sense for us, considering our history. It was my poor attempt at being delicate after asking such personal questions.” He blushed a little and you couldn’t help but grin at him.

You shrugged, “Honestly, I’m glad you’re asking. I want to understand it all, and I’m sure Poe will want to as well. Have you spoken to him at all? Is he awake?” You wanted to see him, tell him everything was okay now.

Tahla opened his mouth to reply, only another voice cut in from the other side of the curtain. “I’m awake, sweetheart.” Your friend stood then and walked around to the other side of your bed, pulling the curtain along as he did. You watched Poe come into view, sitting on his bed with his legs over the side, and you knew straight away he’d heard everything. Meeting his gaze, you felt your stomach flutter in a sudden wave of nerves, because there he was.

Your Poe.

Tahla was saying something to him, but you couldn’t focus on what because you were lost in his eyes, drinking in his features, the soft expression on his face as he gazed at you, and you realized that whatever Tahla had done to cure you of the pollen, it had worked. Because you were looking at Poe now without any barriers-no pollen, no grief, no anger-and you felt like you were back on Gold team, the night before Charlie died, walking across the cantina as Poe watched you and you started to realize how you felt...

He pulled his gaze away, meeting Tahla’s outstretched hand and you looked to your hands where they sat in your lap. You swallowed, your mouth suddenly dry, though the hovering medical droid passed you a cup of water moments later and provided a nice distraction from your thoughts.

“Well, you’ll both remain here for a few more hours just for observation, but I’m releasing you at dinner time. You’re cleared for duty, so I’m sure you’ll be in the field as of tomorrow.”

“And we...you’re sure, one hundred percent sure, that nothing else can happen? That I-we-“ Poe broke off awkwardly, and you kept your eyes on the drink in your hand.

“I’m completely, entirely sure, Commander.” Tahla assured you both, “Listen, I’ll be off by dinner time so I’d love to catch up if you’re both up to it?”

You glanced up, meeting Tahla’s warm eyes, “That sounds great, Tahla.”

You saw Poe nod out of the corner of your eye, “Yeah man, see you then.”

He left you then, not before reminding you both to relax, and throwing a wink your way that you knew Poe hadn’t seen. When the door shut behind him, you were both silent for a long minute, though you could sense Poe looking at you. And you felt...nervous, under his gaze now, though you wanted to look at him as well, you were afraid of what he might read from your expression. He’d always been able to read you well, and you him.

“How are you doing, sweetheart?” He finally broke the silence, his voice low.

You clasped your hands in your lap, then looked up and met Poe’s eyes. The heart rate monitor gave you away, gave you both away. Each of you gazed at one another, hearts racing, and you thought it felt really good to be looking at Poe, no pollen making it about sex. Instead, you looked over at your best friend and realized how much you cared for him. How much you missed him. How scared you had been to lose him again.

Before you could overthink it, you were out of your bed. It was only a few steps to his, just enough time for Poe to sit up straight, eyes bright, before catching you in his arms. You flung yours around his shoulders and pulled him close, stepping between his legs as you did. “Poe,” You murmured, and his arms tightened around you in response.

You slid one hand into the curls at the nape of his neck, smiling to yourself when you heard him give a low sigh in response. He pressed his face into your neck, making you feel safer than you’d ever felt in your life, wrapped there in his arms. You think you were both putting a lot of things left unsaid into the hug, neither of you quite ready to talk it all out, but silently agreeing all was forgiven.

And as clear as you realized your feelings were for Poe Dameron, you also knew that you weren’t ready to voice them aloud, no longer because you denied them, but rather because you feared they wouldn’t be reciprocated.

Poe didn’t trust the contact, despite the Twi’lek’s easy smile and friendly banter. His opinion was possibly coloured by the fact that Dario had first greeted Jess, whom he’d met several times, before promptly and very obviously dropping his gaze to check you out and then making a show of shaking your hand as Poe glowered at him. He would have remained angrier had he not noticed you shift a little closer to him once Dario looked away to take his seat.

“Listen, I think considering the shit I’ve gone through to give you this information, the least you can all do is enjoy another drink with me,” Dario stated, tapping his glass with a long green finger. “At least make me feel like we’re friendly, Jess.”

Jess rolled her eyes, her jaw tight, “Don’t pretend to suffer more than you do, Dario, it’s unbecoming.” The Twi’lek barked laughter in response. Jess sighed, “We can stay a little longer, and then we’re giving you your credits and you are giving us our intel and we’re leaving, got it?”

“Fine, fine,” He relented, glancing around at the three of you, “Well, who's buying this round?”

Poe wasn’t about to let the man out of his sight, something that you understood just from the set of his shoulders because you sat forward instantly, “I’ll go,” You shot Poe a look that said you were just as annoyed as him before standing up and stepped past him carefully.

Dario noticed the way Poe’s eyes determinedly stared at the table when you stepped over his lap. And he didn’t let it go unmentioned, either, “So are you two a thing or do you just enjoy the heavy sexual tension you carry for one another?”

Jess tried to hide her laughter in her drink, giving Poe an apologetic sort of look when he glared at her. “You said friendly, not friends. I’m not going to let you braid my hair and ask about feelings and shit.” He huffed, to which Dario simply chuckled, raising his glass at Poe.

“Sorry, sorry. Just wanted to be prepared if you suddenly started going at it on the table.”

“You know what man,” Poe growled through clenched teeth, leaning forward, “You suck at making friends.”

Dario raised his green hands in mock surrender, “Then you won’t mind that a smuggler just pinched her ass?” He jerked his chin toward the bar and Poe whipped his head around, seeking you out in the crowd.

Sure enough, you were leaning against the bar and a large, unruly-looking man was standing way too fucking close. Poe was out of his seat in an instant, catching your eye as he approached. The thing about places like Maz’s was that if a little traveller woman like you suddenly pulled out highly skilled hand-to-hand combat moves, it would draw a lot of attention, which your group was rather eager to avoid. Poe, on the other hand, could easily get away with what he decided to do the moment he saw you flinch, the smuggler having pinched you again.

Wordlessly, he pulled you close with one hand and grabbed the back of the smuggler's neck at the same time. Before he could react to Poe’s sudden appearance, his face was smacking off of the bar. He folded somewhat comically, unconscious on the floor. Poe looked at the bartender now placing the drinks on the counter.

“Here’s a few extra credits for the trouble, man.” He passed them over, and the gruff-looking man merely grumbled his thanks, pocketing the credits and then directing a nearby droid to drag the man outside.

“That was satisfying,” You quipped at his side, drawing Poe’s gaze. You pitched your voice lower to prevent anyone from overhearing you, “I think you broke his nose, flyboy.”

Poe laughed, releasing his hold on you but moving his hand to rest on your lower back, just in case anyone else thought they could come near you. “You good? I can go outside and finish him off, you know.” He was only half-joking, and you arched a brow at him before reaching out to pick up the drinks, passing two to him to carry.

“If I can resist the urge to kill him, then you can too,” You replied, leading the way back to the table. “But thank you all the same.”

Before he could reply, Poe met the amused expression on Dario’s face and frowned at him over your shoulder. Jess was determinedly looking anywhere but Poe, which told him enough about where her loyalties were. And while you’d been all smiles for him moments ago, evidently your patience had been torn to shreds from your interaction with the smuggler.

“Alright, here’s your fucking drink,” You growled, slamming the glass on the table in front of Dario, “Now hand over the intel or I’m kicking your ass.” Poe had to bite back a proud smile.

Dario exhaled as he gave you a weary look, “Wow, you’re kind of scary when you get all worked up,” He admitted, shooting back his drink in one go, “Since I don’t think you really want to be my friend now, I’ll give up on the attempt here at civility.”

You gave a cold laugh as Jess leaned toward Dario, “Look, you promised me good intel, good enough that I called in these two to get it straight from you rather than risk it hopping between squadrons. Hand it over and you get your credits and a continued pass from our people to remain on Takodana peacefully.”

With a roll of his icy blue eyes, the Twi-lek man reached into an inner front pocket of his jacket and pulled out a data stick, passing it to you. You grabbed for it but Dario didn’t let go straight away, instead leaning forward to meet your eyes levelly as you both held the intel. “Probably should mention one thing,” He began, and Poe felt himself go rigid, eyes on Dario.

“Oh yeah?” You replied coldly, giving another tug on the intel.

Dario let go of it, “The man I stole that from has a lot of people working for him and I may have been made a few minutes ago. More than likely there are First Order officers on their way, which is why you’ll be happy to hear I no longer want your money. Just sneak me out the back with you and I’ll be on my merry way, deal?”

Poe’s eyes flicked around the room, seeing no immediate threats but fully aware that sneaking out was going to be an issue with so little warning. You had stiffened, then quickly pushed the data stick down the front of your shirt into your chest band before reaching across the table and grabbing Dario’s shirt roughly, tugging him close. “You motherfuck-“

Jess was already typing into her comm as you let loose on Dario, unleashing the fury of your words in place of kicking the shit out of him and Poe continued to survey the room. “Poe,” Jess said, and he glanced toward her, “I’ve got back up coming in for a distraction in two. You’ll have to go out the doorway to the south, take a long way around to your ship.”

“Well, it was great seeing you again, Jess,” He replied lightly, “We’ll have to do this again sometime. Everything, the bad drinks, the toxic masculinity, our idiot Twi’lek the Major is currently teaching a new language. Really, it’s been wonderful.” With a final laugh, Jess reached over and patted your head in farewell, winked at Poe, and then sprinted away from the table to meet her backup outside. The distant sounds of shouting and a sudden loud bang was all the warning Poe needed a minute later.

Grabbing you by the arm, Poe quickly stood and began toward the exit, hearing rather than seeing that Dario was still there because he was cursing as he stumbled along in your angry grip. Pushing through the doorway, he heard Dario cry out in pain and glanced around to see him reaching for his shin. You had kicked him. “Sweetheart, need you to-“

You were on your wrist comm before he finished, “On it,” You said, running a scan of the immediate area, which thankfully came up clean, “It’s your lucky day, Dario, you get to live to see another. I’d say farewell, but I wouldn’t mean it!”

Poe laughed, then pointed into the tree line, “Go that way as long as you can before circling back to your ride, they’ll be gone pretty soon.” He told the Twi’lek, who grunted his thanks and tore off in the direction Poe had indicated. “Which way?” He asked you, knowing you had the entire area memorized in preparation for this mission.

You nodded to his right, adjusting the bag on your shoulders, “That way, there’s some water we can lose them in. Unless you’ll let me go and kill Dario-“

“I’ll let you kill him if we ever bump into him again, I promise,” Poe grabbed your hand and started running, neither of you unaware of the danger you were in with First Order troops nearby. Once safely in the cover of the trees, he continued between breaths, “Though I think it’s safe to say he’s going to be in hiding for a while.”

“He won’t be able to hide from me if this intel is anything but as good as he claimed,” You grumbled, your grip on Poe’s hand tightening as you jumped over thick roots, “You think Jess is alright?”

“Of course,” And he wasn’t lying, he knew she would be long gone by now, seeing as this was more her territory than anything. “You should really be more worried about us, sweetheart.”

You giggled, “I am! Listen, I know we said we’d go straight around to our ship but with Dario out there knowing that it’s probably best we hide for a while.” You left it unspoken, but it meant that you’d be camping in the dense wilderness as you hid from the First Order with highly sought-after intel that they didn’t want in the hands of the Resistance.

“All in a day’s work, eh?”

You sighed heavily in response. Jumping into the ankle-deep stream, you began walking in the opposite direction of the ship, further into the forest. Poe felt the water soak through his socks in seconds and couldn’t help but agree with your angry reaction back in the Cantina. Careless or intentional, Dario had all but ensured Poe and you would be on the run until you could get off of this planet and escape in hyperspace. And he had wet socks to top it all off.

“It’s open!” You called out, glancing up from the dining table where you were sealing the last few boxes of your mothers' things, to see Tahla Martell standing in your doorway. “Hey, Tahla.” You said warmly, moving to greet him in the hallway.

“Hi kid,” He replied, pulling you in for a hug, “I know you’re leaving first thing and you already said your goodbyes to us all, but I didn’t want you to be alone on your last night on Yavin-4.” He held up a covered dish that you caught the scent of, his mother's lasagna.

Warmth spread through you at his kind gesture, “Tahla, that’s so sweet of you,” You had to clear your throat, blinking back tears.

It had been a rough few months since your mother had passed, the house you’d lived in with her for over a year without Charlie and Poe seeming far too big now with just you wondering the lonely hallways. Packing things into storage was at least somewhat therapeutic, and you were keeping the house, but you knew you wouldn’t be visiting anytime soon. It just felt wrong to sell it until you saw Charlie in person and discussed the options.

And you felt a little guilty too, with how excited you were to be headed to the Resistance base the next morning. You’d be seeing your brother and Poe again after two years apart and you couldn’t wait. The fact that your friend understood your mixed emotions and shown up with dinner was...beyond appreciated. Tahla had always been good to you, even when you were younger and Poe had caught you kissing and punched him for it. He hadn’t done anything other than saying he’d prefer to be friends and a friend he’d remained all of this time.

“Are you hungry now?” He asked, and you nodded before moving to the kitchen and realizing you packed up all the plates. Tahla followed you, placing the food onto the table.

“Uh, you okay with eating straight from the dish? I think I have some forks...” You glanced around and spotted the box with cutlery, popping it open and pulling out utensils. Tahla laughed and sat at the kitchen table, taking the cover off of the food. You joined him, moving your chair close and passing him a fork before you both dug in.

You ate in comfortable silence, eating your fill and then sitting back in your seat and pushing the rest toward Tahla while you held your full stomach in content. You looked around the bare kitchen, another wave of nostalgia and emotion bubbling up.

“It feels sadder because it’s not how you pictured it,” Tahla said, breaking into your thoughts. You looked up at him, confused, and he clarified. “You were supposed to be leaving while your mom fussed over you and promised you she’d spend all of her free time with my mom, that she wouldn’t be lonely. She was supposed to take you to the flight dock and wave at you when you boarded, tell you to give Charlie and Poe hugs from her. It’s okay to be sad about how it is instead.”

Emotion swelled again and you nodded because he was right. Your mother was supposed to be here, you were the one that was leaving her, it shouldn’t have been this twisted version, where she left you by way of a sudden and fatal heart attack as you shopped the market together one morning several months before. Tahla and his mother had been at the market as well, a few booths away haggling when they’d heard you screaming, and Tahla had had to pull you away from your mother’s still, peaceful-looking body as his mother checked her pulse and called for Healers. He’d held you for hours, eventually bringing you home, only leaving when you insisted he could come back first thing in the morning.

You ducked your head down as tears spilled onto your cheeks, ashamed to be crying in front of Tahla. He put down his fork and shuffled closer, pulling you in for a gentle hug, patting your back, “I’m sorry, I didn’t want to upset you, I could just tell-”

“No, you’re right,” You interrupted, pulling back only slightly and wiping a hand across your face, “Y-you understand, and I’m grateful. You’ve always been an amazing friend. I’m going to miss you, you know.” You tried for a small smile, and he returned it with his warm one. You sighed, “I just wish I was leaving this place...my home, with better memories. Alone for the last few months, packing things up, sorting out mom’s will, it’s not how I pictured it.”

Tahla nodded in understanding, “I’d tell you to focus on the fact you’re seeing Charlie and Poe, but I know it doesn’t help with this part.”

“I appreciate it all the same, Tahla,” And you leaned back in to hug him again, knowing he’d probably be leaving in a few minutes and wanting to enjoy the last moments of peace before you were alone in this whole house again. “This is a good memory, though, so thank you.”

He chuckled, the vibrations moving you as you leaned into his chest, “I know the lasagna makes it seem like mom sent me over, but I was planning on stopping by either way,” He admitted, his eyes finding yours again when you leaned back. “Didn’t seem right to let (y/n) Horn fly away from home without a proper goodbye, and by that I mean I selfishly wanted to be the last person you saw.”

You quirked a brow at his joke, Tahla was always ready to flirt with you, “Oh yeah? Well, I’m glad you did.” And while your words were light, the tone of voice you used surprised even you, coming out a little more sultry than either of you expected.

You saw Tahla swallow in surprise, his wide eyes flicking from yours, then down to your lips as you wet them. Boldly deciding to go for it because he was your friend and it was your last night at home and he was handsome and kind and sweet-

Tahla closed the distance, pressing his lips to yours and you moaned in response, gripping his shirt. Opening your mouth to deepen the kiss, you smiled because you both tasted like lasagna. Beneath that, though, you could taste the warm, masculine undertones of Tahla Martell, and based on the low rumble in his chest and the way his hands tightened on your waist, he could taste you as well.

It was kind of like one of your books, how you ended up in your bedroom down the hall, clothing stripped as you moved together until you were hitting the bed and he was pulling away from your mouth to move his lips down your bare body. The sun was low now, casting your room in a gentle golden glow and for the first time in some time, you were feeling something other than grief and loneliness in your bed.

The fact that it was with your friend Tahla...while you’d admit you had always imagined your first time with someone different, you had accepted a long time ago that it wouldn’t happen that way. He was older and more experienced and had spent two years worlds away and free to do whatever he wanted. And Tahla had always been your close and trusted friend, he’d been there for you before your mother died and since, and now he was moving his lips and tongue across your most sensitive areas like he couldn’t imagine a better way to be spending his time.

The empty house was filled with your cries and moans as Tahla, who admitted it wasn’t his first time, brought you to the edge and over several times with just his mouth and fingers before he climbed up your body and kissed you again. You moaned, tasting yourself on him, surprised at how turned on that made you, and then almost cried when he moved back and told you that you could stop here if you wanted, that it didn’t need to go any further but he would still stay the night, wouldn’t leave you alone.

You had intended to go all the way the moment he’d literally lifted you from your chair in the kitchen, but now you pulled him to you with a renewed sense of longing, telling him you trusted him, that you needed him. He didn’t to be told twice, his eyes searching yours one moment, then dropping down between your bodies as he glided his cock through your wet folds. He sighed your name when he pushed in, filling you slowly but entirely before stopping and allowing you to adjust to his considerable size. It hadn’t hurt as much as you’d feared, but the sharp sting was still enough to have your eyes pricking, and he leaned forward and peppered you with soft kisses and kind words, encouraging you to voice what you needed and tell him if anything was too much.

It had surprised you both when the pain had ebbed away and you were suddenly rolling your hips eagerly. Tahla recovered and braced his elbows on the bed and began a hard pace that had you practically begging for more, unrelenting even as you came around him. He grunted as he neared his orgasm, his pace slowing to draw the pleasure out as long as you both could stand. He let you roll him onto his back and ride him at an almost lazy pace, his eyes never shutting, even when you found just the right angle to draw the deepest groans from him, intent on watching your face. He’d seemed almost in awe of you like he couldn’t believe what was happening even though it had been...well, the sun had set so going on just over an hour, you had realized.

When you came again as you rode him and his name tore from your lips, Tahla went over the edge with you. He had grabbed your hips and held you down when he came, your name mixing with curses as he filled you.

And then you’d let yourself fall forward and shift, felt him slide out of you before cuddling in and realizing that he meant what he said, that he wasn't going anywhere. He even kissed you again between whispering his promises to remain, his praise over how good it felt to be with you.

You think you loved him a little then, but at the same time, you couldn’t help but think of how he’d done a good job replacing the man you’d pictured having your first time with and you knew that it was a good thing this had happened on the eve of your departure. You could love Tahla Martell but never fall in love with him.

Tahla woke with you in the morning, helped you gather your things, promised to check in on the place occasionally. And then he drove you to the flight dock, where he waved you off with a promise to see you again someday. His smile a little sadder but genuine and filled with enough affection to have you run back for one last hug goodbye, one last kiss on the cheek and a final thank you for being everything you had needed without even knowing.

“This is cozy, really very cozy,” Poe grumbled from where he sat on the cold ground of a small-make that, minuscule, cave that you’d found after several hours of hiking through the forest stream. “Just enough room to stretch out and feel the ache in every part of my body.”

You hummed in reply, rifling through the backpack you’d had strapped on during the journey. “I can only feel the blisters on my feet, everything else is nothing compared to those.”

Poe grunted in agreement, glancing down at his now bare feet. They were reddened and bloody from sloshing through the water for so long in cheap boots. “Think I’ll be fighting you on who gets to take out Dario now, sweetheart.” You laughed tiredly in response.

You were settled on the ground in front of him, pulling out items from the pack now; food rations, water, and a medical kit. He’d put a small light on, the glow barely casting, just enough to see each other. Poe watched you kick off your shoes and then peel off your socks, setting them aside with Poe’s to dry, before tearing open your ration and taking a bite. Plucking his ration from your extended hand, Poe copied you and together you ate in silence, the meal brief but filling. His eyes were already starting to droop, the busy day catching up to him.

You pulled out some small bacta patches from the medical kit and pointed to his feet, “I’ll do yours if you do mine,” You smiled, and he chuckled lowly, nodding.

You held out your hand for his feet and he carefully adjusted his legs to plop them into your lap, reclining back on his hands. He watched you work, tugging the light closer to see his blisters better and place patches over each one, which instantly eased the discomfort. When you finished, you squeezed his leg before pulling out a cleaning wipe and working it over your hands. You glanced up very suddenly, catching Poe as he watched you.

He held your gaze, wishing he could read your mind. He could tell you were equally as annoyed with the way the mission had turned out as he was, that you were relaxed over the current predicament because you’d both escaped the close reach of the First Order plenty of times before. You were tired, too, but there was something else about the way you looked at him that sent heat up his back, and he felt grateful again for the freedom from the pollen-now he knew his reactions to you were genuine, and he felt the depths for which they went, the intensity, the rightness of it all.

“I feel like we’re thinking the same thing right now,” You surprised him by saying, passing him a package of patches, then switching places to rest your feet in his lap instead. Poe caught your feet in his hands deftly.

“What’s that?”

You tilted your head, a small smile tugging your lips upward, “That it’s nice to be around each other without any other bullshit affecting us-pollen or anger, I mean.” Poe wasn’t sure if it was your intent or not, but something about the tone of your voice had him flushing, and he returned your smile quickly before dropping his gaze to your feet.

He set to work, wanting to laugh at how small your feet were, before replying, “I was thinking that, yes,” He admitted, carefully placing the patches on your blisters. “It’s nice...nice to know what I’m feeling is real, now.”

“Yeah, it sure does,” You agreed softly, sighing a little when he placed the final patch over a particularly nasty-looking wound. You tossed him a wipe and he cleaned off his hands as he moved his eyes from your feet to your face. “Thank you.” You added, wiggling your toes happily.

Pulling your feet from his lap, you returned to rummaging in your backpack, first finding a couple of pairs of clean, dry socks for you each to put on. You then pulled out two thin, rolled-up blankets. Poe sighed, “I’m guessing you don’t have a couple of comfortable fold-out cots in there, Major?” He teased, and you giggled while shaking your head.

“Just some lovely, extra scratchy cameo blankets, Commander,” You passed him one of the pitiful little blankets. They were made of a material mixture that worked to confuse heat signature detection more than they provided any warmth or comfort, but they were better than nothing. That’s what he told himself, anyway.

It took no time at all to prepare to sleep, though as Poe shifted around on the hard ground he wondered exactly how he would achieve it. Usually, he was content to pop a jacket under his head, but the planet was warm enough this time of year that you’d only packed a couple of very thin raincoats as a precaution. You clicked off the light and laid next to him, a few inches separating your bodies as you tucked yourselves into your blankets and tried to get comfortable.

It was maybe three minutes later, staring into the pitch black, the Poe gathered the courage to throw out a suggestion. “Proposal...” He spoke softly into the darkness and heard your head turn toward him.

“Go on then,” You replied, though he could sense you had probably guessed what he was going to say, seeing as you were no doubt as uncomfortable laying flat on the rocky ground.

“How about we roll your blanket into a makeshift pillow, you come here and share mine, and we actually get some rest?”

Instead of replying he heard you sit up and felt a brush of air across his face from you lifting your blanket to straighten it and roll. Now that he’d offered up the idea, however, Poe tensed slightly at the realization that he was moments away from holding you in his arms. He felt his face grow warm and felt grateful for the impenetrable darkness the cramped cave provided.

“Lift,” You said at the same moment your hand found his head, tapping. He raised his head and you slid the rolled blanket underneath, providing immediate relief. Poe slowly reached out for you, hesitating when he found your back, then curling it around you when you shuffled into his side and laid against him. After a moment, your head dropped down onto his chest, though your body was almost rigid against his. Another instance where the ability to read your mind would come in handy.

“Relax, sweetheart,” He murmured, turning his head and pressing his lips to your hair. He adjusted the blanket, ensuring it covered you both, then rested his hand on your hip. He thought you might not listen, you still seemed frozen against him, but Poe was smiling a moment later when he felt your entire body melt into the side of his before your hand came to rest over his heart. The position was so familiar, a lifetime of nights together growing up just like this, that he almost couldn’t bear it. “That’s it, sweet girl, get some sleep.”

He couldn’t have said what happened after that, because you both very promptly fell asleep, warm and safe in one another’s arms. Despite being on the cool, hard ground in a cave in the forests of Takodana, hiding from the First Order, Poe had one hell of a good sleep that night.

—

You were staring through a gap in the trees towards the shipyard outside of Maz Kanata’s castle, sitting entirely still in the morning light that filtered through the trees as you surveilled for any sign of First Order troops. You’d bee on watch for twenty minutes while Poe ran around the perimeter, and you were on edge. You didn’t like having to separate, afraid if one of you was captured you’d be less likely to get away without backup, but there was nothing to be done for it.

You might also be a little worked up from spending the night wrapped in Poe’s arms, but you weren’t focusing on the right now. You definitely weren’t fixating on the way he’d spoken to you to encourage you to relax, nor of how he’d called you ‘sweet girl’ and seemed unaware of the effect that had on you. And you certainly were not remembering how, upon waking up at dawn and enough light came into the cave, you had realized how wrapped around one another you were. At some point in the night, you’d both shifted, legs tangled and Poe’s head nuzzled into your neck, an arm wrapped over your body in a way that made you feel safe at the same time revealing how small you felt compared to his broad, muscular frame.

But most of all, you were absolutely not thinking about how Poe had woken up moments after you, lifted his head to peer down at you with heavy-lidded eyes, and then just held your gaze with an unreadable expression on his face that had left you breathless. It was like he’d pinned you to the floor with that fucking look, and you weren’t sure if it was a minute or an hour before your comm alarm went off, indicating an incoming message, and you tore your eyes away to read the message from Jess, who’d managed to send through that it was safe to return to your ship.

In fact, you were so focused on your mission, so completely not obsessing over the last twenty hours, that you were not at all surprised when Poe suddenly appeared at your side, panting slightly from his run.

He saw you jump in surprise. “Did I scare you?” He joked, and you grumbled in response, though this was worse than denying it outright and he started to laugh, before pointing ahead to the pathway “We can take that, head straight for the ship, everything is clear ahead.”

Click.

All it took was the sound of a blaster’s safety clicking off for Poe to grab you and whirl, shielding you completely from the enemy who had snuck up on your six. It took a second for you to steady yourself, then you had to peer carefully around his shoulder to see who it was. The familiar green form stood a few feet away with a grimace, pointing a fairly old-looking blaster directly at you and Poe.

“Dario, you fucking-“ You snarled, attempting to move around Poe but his arm shot back and held you behind him with surprising strength, and you stilled.

“I know, I know,” Dario drawled, unmoving, “Honestly, I had no plans to do this but the First Order put a pretty decent reward out for whoever manages to capture you two. Figured I could get back into their good graces, clear my ledger, you know how it is honey.”

Poe had left his hand resting at your hip, and at Dario’s words, his grip tightened. You were pressed against his back and could feel the tension, the coil in his muscles ready to snap. “Buddy, you do not want to try this. Handing us over to the First Order only puts a massive target on your head-and the Resistance doesn’t play games when it comes to betrayal.” His words were laced with venom, his voice low.

You’d seen Poe like this only a few times in your life because usually when it came to being cornered by enemies he was cocky, mouthing off to distract until he could come up with a plan. Today, however, Poe was almost frightening to you, his focused rage as intense as it was. You pressed a hand into his back, just to do something to calm him-this was one Twi’lek, surely you could take him before he called for back up, when your hand brushed over something hard.

His blaster.

Yours was at your hip, and you knew it was too risky to go for it with Dario pointing his own at Poe’s heart. You wouldn’t even attempt it, however, the blaster tucked into the back of his pants, hidden beneath his shirt, was more than ideal. You just had to time it right.

“Look, I’m more sorry than anyone that it’s come to this. But you two are valuable, did you know that? I certainly didn’t,” Dario took a half step closer, his eyes moving from yours, where you were still peeking from around Poe, and then up to Poe’s, “I will do you one favour though. I won’t tell them how close you are; hopefully, that’ll keep them from torturing you in front of one another-“

Your temper flared again, “They wouldn’t get anything out of us regardless, Dario, that’s why this is fruitless. You hand us over and you’re only letting us die!” As you spoke, you dropped your hand to pull Poe’s shirt from his pants, sliding your hand underneath to grip the blaster.

“Don’t,” Poe said firmly, his eyes still on Dario. You knew it was a command for you, and you hesitated.

Dario sighed, “I have to, and I’m sorry about this but I’ll have to shoot you, big guy because I can’t risk things getting physical,” He lowered the blaster to aim for Poe’s leg, “I hear the First Order have excellent medical staff, so-“

You felt Poe’s grip on your arm adjust, and realized he was going to try and throw you out of harm’s way and take the shot. Now, you didn’t hesitate, pulling the blaster out, clicking the safety off and aiming it at Dario’s head before he realized what was happening. With no other choice, Poe let you go as you stepped from behind him.

“That’s good, you’re going to need them.” You seethed, watching in amusement as Dario tightened his hold on his blaster, gritting his teeth to outgun you. He didn’t stand a chance. You shot his arm first, forcing him to drop his weapon, and then fired two more shots; one to the opposite shoulder, and one to the leg. He cried out in agony and you marched forward, flipping the blaster in your hand to grip the heated shaft, and drove the blunt end into the side of his head.

Dario sagged to the ground, unconscious.

“Well, I’ll hand that one to you,” Poe spoke from behind you, and you glanced around to find him watching you, hands on his hips, smirking in a way that didn’t meet his eyes. “Even if you did ignore my order.”

With a sigh, you held out his blaster for him, watching his jaw clench as he took it from you. “You put that in the report. And I’ll put in the part where you shoved me behind you,” You quipped, quirking a brow at him. He knew it wasn’t protocol for him to have protected you like that, and as much as you were touched and your heart was racing over how instantaneously he had reacted to ensure you were safe, you weren’t going to let him chew you out for doing the same. “Now can we leave this fucking forest, flyboy, or do you want to punish me first?”

You hadn’t meant the words to come out so...charged. You were worked up, still reeling a little over the fact that Poe was almost shot, and you wanted to leave before anything else happened. He had been watching you like he expected your initial remarks calling him out for the break in protocol, seemingly amused. You weren’t sure what he was going to shoot back at you, and you didn’t find out because the moment you tacked on the last line, his expression went blank and he simply stared at you for a very long moment.

You couldn’t look away from him, despite the heat crawling up your neck from embarrassment. You weren’t even sure where the words had come from, because they were enormously similar to how you and Poe used to speak to one another, teasingly, but you’d said it with so much more attitude. Like you were flirting without caution, and it caught him entirely off guard. You wished you could read his mind, as his eyes, now brighter than you’d seen them in a while, searchd your face.

“Let’s...let’s go,” He finally looked away, his eyes flicking around the forest, then to the still unconscious Dario, and then to his blaster. You weren’t sure, but you thought his voice came out a little more husky than usual, and heat pooled in your core as you briefly wondered what being punished by Poe Dameron would feel like.

Poe stood under the hot water, eyes closed, replaying the last few days in his head. His fresher was one of the few places he could be completely alone and he was taking advantage of a quiet afternoon to himself.

After returning from Takodana that morning, he had taken the intel from you to give to BB8 to begin decryption, and you had gone off to begin working on your mission report. Usually, you did this right in the hangar, but today you’d given him a shy smile, and then marched off. He hadn’t seen you since, though he was sure he would find you in the dining hall for dinner.

He was worked up from the mission, that much he knew for sure. It hadn’t gone as planned-when did they ever?-but he was, well, fucking impressed with you. You’d always been something else when it came to being pinned in a corner, though thankfully he’d only seen it a couple of times. But today you had been like a warrior goddess, shooting Dario without even a tremble in your finger and then knocking him unconscious like it was an afterthought. You made it all look easy.

He tried to admonish you just a little for ignoring him, but you had been right that he wasn’t one to talk about breaking protocol. And then you hit him with that flirtatious little line, wetting your fucking lips as you said it, appearing a little shocked at your boldness. He’d had to force himself to go blank, fearing your ability to read him like a book, while he watched you squirm under his gaze.

That pollen had nothing, nothing, on you. An innocent remark from you and he was bulldozed, ready to drop to his knees and tell you he’d give you whatever you wanted, needed, even if he had to fly across the galaxy for it. And you had no idea, he could see that you just didn’t know how much of a hold you had on him, on his heart. Poe had gone back to the med bay the other day, before the mission, and confirmed twice over with Tahla and his team that he was clear of all toxins because his feelings were so intense.

And he’d realized that what he was feeling was so much more real and right compared to the foggy desire that the pollen had caused. And he knew now, after watching you in action in the cantina, and then as you found a safe spot to hide for the night, and certainly in the morning when he’d woken up wrapped around you and gazed into your sleepy eyes, that he loved you.

That he was in love with you.

There was no one else.

And there never would be, because you were his soulmate.

Stepping out of the shower, Poe dried off and began dressing. His mind was flipping through old memories, some from when you were kids, others from after you’d joined the Resistance, each of them evidence to support his realization. He was fastening his trousers when a knock sounded at his door, and he wandered over and hit the release button without thinking, so lost in thought as he was.

“Hey, Poe, sorry I...uh...” You faltered, wide eyes falling comically down his bare torso before snapping up to look somewhere above his eyebrows. Your voice came out almost in a squeak, “Just seeing if you wanted to get dinner.”

Seeing you get flustered looking at him made Poe sweat. He stepped away from you and went to his dresser, pulling out a black tee. “Sounds good,” He replied slowly, then glanced back over at you and grinned. “You want me to throw some cold water on you, sweetheart?”

His joking had the desired effect, instantly clearing the tension from the room. You laughed, rolling your eyes. “I’ll be fine, flyboy.”

“I don’t know, I recall a day at the river a long time ago, pulling off my shirt and then you falling out of a tree...”

You scoffed, then stuttered, stepping into Poe’s room, “I-that’s not, I was talking to someone. It wasn’t because of-Uhg!” You flipped him the bird then, unable to form a clear sentence in Basic. Poe was laughing, enjoying the teasing banter as he walked over to his desk and picked up his wrist comm, glancing at the time.

When he looked back up, expecting to see you still laughing shyly, he was surprised to find you frozen, eyes glued onto something over his shoulder. His brows came together in concern, “What’s up?” He looked around, following your sightline.

At first, he was momentarily confused because you were looking at his corkboard. But when his eyes fell to the picture of you, Charlie and him he realized you didn’t know he had it. He’d seen it in your room a while ago and had almost started sobbing on the spot. But you hadn’t come to Poe’s room before this.

Poe turned around to find you with a watery smile, your gaze fixed on him in an intensely affectionate way. “You kept that all these years?” You sounded winded, eyes locked on his. Poe swallowed, nodding, and felt himself blush.

He couldn’t look away if he wanted to.

He didn’t want to, though. He was pretty certain he could remain on this spot in his room as he burned under your gaze for the rest of his life. A million questions formed in his mind and he didn’t know where to start, what to say first.

The silence was broken by the sounds of footsteps in the hall. Pulling both of you out of the moment to look around at Poe’s still open door. Tahla appeared then, breaking into a grin when he saw you both. “Hi! Glad I caught you both, I was hoping to join you for dinner?” He stopped in the doorway politely.

As disappointment washed through him, Poe relaxed his stance and tossed Tahla a grin, “And here (y/n) was asking me to dinner too, I’m more popular than I thought!” You giggled, shaking your head in amusement, but Poe could see you bite your lip when you glanced back at him.

He thought maybe Tahla was giving you both a knowing look, but it slid off his face when you turned to walk out of Poe’s room. Grateful for his lack of comment, Poe clapped Tahla’s shoulder once in step with him in the hallway, and his old friend winked at him in response.

—

34 ABY

Poe knocked on the door of General Organa’s private quarters, repeating the motion desperately until it finally slid open and he burst through, eyes searching until they landed on Leia. She gave him a knowing look like she’d been expecting him. Of course, she was, she knew what was at stake now.

“General,” He glanced around, confirming they were alone. “You know what I know. Please help me.” He didn’t care how desperate he sounded.

Leia sighed, nodding kindly, “Of course I will...but Commander, Poe, it’s not going to be easy. There’s always going to be danger-“

Poe rubbed a hand over his face, “I know, I know but I have to do something. Tell me the safest planet, and then I’ll go to Jakku, I’ll find Lor San Tekka. I’ll complete my mission.”

The General stood, her expression soft, “You won’t be able to-“

Poe shook his head, “I know.” His voice broke.

“Then I know just the place.”

Did you enjoy this chapter? Consider leaving a comment or reblogging to ease my inner turmoil as a writer. I’d love to hear your thoughts!

Taglist

@mermaidxatxheart @foxilayde @eleinemk @paintballkid711 @mylifeisactuallyamess @20th-centu-fairy-girl @deitysnips @cannedsoupsucks @ubri812 @poedameronloverx @hoeforthefictional @astrological-bitch @itsnottilly @itsdameron @alex-sulli @generousrunawaydonut @wildmoonflower @onlyferorder66 @afootnoteinyourhappiness

#reader insert #fanfic #poe dameron x reader #poe dameron #angst #fluff #multichapter #night changes series #friends to lovers #star wars #poe dameron fanfic #poe dameron imagine #poe x reader #poe dameron x female reader #poe dameron smut #oscar isaac

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angst-fairygodmother · 3 years

Note

37 and 66 from I love you things with Ollie and Jess?

A/N: Hi Nonny! Thank you so much for this prompt. I’m so sorry it took me a while to write, but I hope it was worth the wait. I went back and forth while writing this between making it a reader-insert and using Jess as an actual OC and finally settled on the latter, because it just felt right. (Which is probably how I will continue to write this pair going forward also.) Word Count: 3493 Rating: G - mostly fluff - heights (and fear of influencing how it’s written), a little swearing, referenced/implied panic attack

Jess closed the shop at 6pm on the dot, giving herself an hour to get ready for...whatever Ollie had planned. There weren’t a lot of places to go out to dinner in the area, and she desperately hoped he wouldn’t start out by inviting her home to meet the infamous Charlie Sway. She chewed nervously on her nail, staring at her closet. She knew she needed something that would work for anything, but her mind continued to run in circles trying to decide exactly what that meant.

She couldn’t remember the last time she’d given this much thought to what she looked like on someone else’s account. It felt strange to say the least. But, she mused, not a bad kind of strange. Eventually, she settled on a cute cream-colored sweater and jeans, hoping that the evening temperature dropped enough to make them reasonable.

There was a soft knock on the door and she frantically cast one last look over herself in the mirror, smoothing down her shirt and hair, stomach twisting nervously.

She threw open the door perhaps a bit overenthusiastically, a warm expression on her face.

“Hi,” she greeted him, the single syllable all she could get out as she met those soft blue eyes.

Ollie grinned when he saw her, the excited, adoring expression making her heart flutter. It was hard for Jess not to scoff at the cliché, when she was behaving like the protagonists of the romances she sold by the dozen. But at least he was looking at her the same way, and seemed at least momentarily speechless.

“Uh, do you want to come in?” she offered meekly after a moment, gesturing over her shoulder. “Or I can come out, and we can...I mean...um...”

The two of them stood there, staring at each other dumbly for a moment, on either side of the doorway.

“So...where are we going?” she asked after a long pause ripe with awkward tension. She wanted to kick herself. Ollie had been so easy to talk to from the moment he walked into her store, but now, suddenly they were going on a proper date and everything felt different?

“I have a picnic bag in the back of my car, and I thought we could drive somewhere, and then maybe hike a bit?”

“A hike?” she asked nervously. “Like, up into the mountains?”

“Yeah. There’s a point up there that has great views of the entire town and the lake. Nik heard about it from one of the girls at the bar we were flirting with…I mean he was flirting with mostly. It wasn’t...I mean I didn’t...and this was before I met you…”

“Ollie,” she laughed lightly, tilting her head to one side to look at him. “I’m not the blushing, swooning virginal maiden, and I don’t expect you to be either.”

He coughed, face turning crimson and she couldn’t help smiling fondly. Finally, things were feeling a little more normal, this was still the same Ollie she had come to adore.

“You’re also only here for the summer, or however long it takes you to find your Dad’s record. So I hadn’t set my hopes on serious, or exclusive. I just think you’re cute, and fun to be around, so why not enjoy something and see what happens with it?”

“Oh.” His face twisted as he considered her words.

“However, I don’t think a hike is a good idea. It’s going to be dark soon.”

“There’s still almost two hours before sunset, and I brought flashlights so we can get back down the mountain.”

Of course, he had planned ahead. It would be stupid to plan a hiking date and not account for that, and he was far from stupid. And they were both dressed fine for the occasion. Her mind quested desperately for some other reason that they shouldn’t go and came up blank. So instead she held up a finger for him to wait, and went back to collect her camera. If she were going to do this, she might as well get some good photographs out of it, she rationed. Maybe even one she could sell prints of, if she was incredibly lucky. (She already felt insanely so, when such a wonderful boy wanted to go out with her, so why not see how far that streak ran?)

The first part of the hike went surprisingly smoothly, and it didn’t take long before Jess and Ollie were joking and laughing, scrabbling over rocks like young goats, playing eye-spy with the woods, any weirdness melting away in the evening sun. She barely noticed the way their path climbed, and felt completely relaxed.

Gradually, without her noticing, the trail narrowed and became steeper, until it rounded a tight bend up ahead, nothing but air off to her left and solid rock to the right. She swallowed nervously, trying to keep her eyes from the empty space. All of her joviality dropped away like the ground.

“Jess?” Ollie asked, noticing her discomfort as she edged very slowly along. “Are you alright?”

“Yes. Yeah. Fine. I just...don’t like heights.” She answered, breath and words coming in short bursts.

“Oh. Shit. Um, we can turn back if you want? I didn't realize you--”

“No. No, it's fine. We're here now. I'll make it through. You just might have to hold my hand for the way back down.”

She’d meant it as a joke, a light flirtation to distract her from the many, many feet she could fall with one misstep. Unfortunately, it didn’t seem to be doing any good, as her mind found a way to focus on both the space and how cheesy the sentence was.

“Do...you want me to now?” he countered, holding one slim hand out.

She flashed him a small smile, taking it with her own and trying not to think too much about how nice, how right it felt. “You’ve been taking lessons with Nikolai haven’t you?”

“What?”

“That was smooth, Oliver,” she teased, enjoying the way he turned red all the way to the tips of his ears.

Eventually, the young couple made it to the overlook, with much gentle guidance from Ollie to keep Jess’s nerves from overwhelming her, and she gasped. The lake stretched out below them, still and silver in the evening light, shining like a mirror. Tiny specks of color, moving too fast or too far for the eye to really track marked the boaters and jetskis, and kites flown from the small public beach. Most of the buildings disappeared into the verdant green surroundings, and the ones she could still spot looked like houses and shops and mansions for Polly Pockets, not people. The sun was just starting to dip behind the mountains on the far side of the lake, hazy outlines of shadow against the sherbert sky.

“Oh, Ollie,” she breathed, stunned. “It’s beautiful.”

He mumbled something she didn’t catch and started unpacking the picnic he’d brought in his backpack. Not wanting to disturb him, and clearly left to her own devices for the moment, she took out her camera, adjusting the lens carefully, capturing as much of the view as she could. Then, on an impulse she turned around and snapped one of Ollie, silhouetted against the forest and the peeks of sunset between the trees, before he could notice. The sound of the shutter, or the finishing touches being put on dinner, made him look up.

“What are you doing, Jess?” he asked, confusion written across his features.

“Taking pictures of beautiful things,” she answered with a shrug, bringing the camera to her eye again.

“No,” he held up his hand to block it, laughing.

“I’m serious. This place, up here away from it all, suits you.”

“You’re full of shit, Jess.” He shook his head, his hair falling across his face.

She took another photo while his guard was down.

“Come sit down. Marlena put together a good meal.”

Relenting after another photo out into the distance, almost wishing she dared to get closer to the edge of the overlook, she carefully disassembled her camera, storing each piece with reverence back in its bag, before sitting across from him. He had set up quite the array on the blanket: simple but delicious looking toasted sandwiches, glasses and lemonade, berries and chunks of watermelon, and what looked like very freshly baked chocolate-chip cookies.

“Ollie, it looks amazing,” she said with a smile, popping a sweet, juicy blackberry into her mouth with a small, exaggerated moan. “And tastes even better.”

He blushed, shrugging and laughing sheepishly. “All I did was carry it up here.”

She rolled her eyes as he deflected yet another compliment. He seemed to always be doing that, much to her frustration, and she made a mental note to find a way to make him see how much she meant them, how true each one was.

Silence fell over the two of them as they started picking at the buffet between them, but it was an easy one, a pause rather than an interruption, and eventually conversation resumed. She asked him about his search for his father’s record and listened as he spoke of the things he had found, which weren’t what he was looking for but seemed to bring (mostly) happy memories of his childhood. He asked for stories of her family, and of what the town was like when summer-people left.

“Sway Lake is a different place,” she concluded eventually, casting her eyes about her on the clifftop, “just like it is from up here. Or frozen in a moment in your record.”

By now the remains of the food had been set aside, and the pair had scooted closer on the picnic blanket, sitting side by side and facing out, instead of across from one another. Hesitantly, Jess shifted her hand closer so that their pinkies brushed, daring him to take action and hold her hand again. He didn’t seem to notice as he turned to face her, eyebrows knitted in confusion.

“I…” he cleared his throat and started over. “You have a really unique view of the world.”

Something in the way he said it made it feel like the kindest compliment someone could give, and it was finally her turn to blush, ducking her head to hide as her cheeks heated furiously.

“I mean I guess,” she fiddled with the edge of the picnic blanket beside her, plucking at a loose thread so she didn’t have to meet his eyes just yet. “I’ve never really thought about it like that...”

“The view up here must be great for photos,” he said, making her laugh at his abrupt change of subject, obviously picking up on her embarrassment and knowing it well.

“Yeah, it is. I’m hoping they come out well. Thank you for showing it to me.”

“The way people were talking, it’s pretty well known...how come you haven’t been up here before?”

“Heights, remember?” she flashed him a half-smile as she tilted her head to one side. “I’ve never had someone invite me before who seemed worth the risk.”

“How do you know if something’s worth it without ever seeing it?”

“You know your record is without hearing it don’t you? Besides, I said someone, not something.”

He froze, blinking owlishly at her.

“Ollie?” she asked after a long pause, wondering what was going on with him suddenly.

“Can I kiss you?” he blurted, and now it was her turn to freeze, the question momentarily incomprehensible.

“Yes,” she breathed, barely getting the word out before his lips were pressed against hers.

The contact was abrupt, almost a headbutt but more romantic. There was a moment of awkward fumbling, of bumping noses and clashing teeth, until their mouths finally slotted together properly. Even after finding the right way to connect, there was a split second of hesitation, and then his hands came up to frame her jaw, pulling her closer, the tips of his fingers teasing at her hairline and the small hairs that had escaped the scrunchie holding most of it back. Keeping one of her own hands on the blanket to hold herself steady, Jess wrapped the other around the back of his neck like an anchor and leaned into the pressure of his soft lips on hers.

All too soon he pulled away, panting breathlessly, and staring at her with an awe that made her own breath catch in her throat. She was half tempted to pull him back into another kiss, if only to make him stop looking at her like that.

A distant roll of thunder shattered the moment, and her eyes flickered toward the clouds gathering on the blue-purple horizon.

“We should probably head back, before that gets here,” she said reluctantly, wishing she had more time.

Ollie nodded in agreement, and the two of them made quick work of packing back up the remains of the picnic. He handed her a heavy black flashlight (that, she noted gratefully, and then laughed internally at her own thought, would double as a decent weapon against a rogue mountain lion at least long enough to run) and set off down the mountain. She tried to follow him without looking down, but the uneven terrain in the growing darkness made that too difficult to maintain. Soon the very idea filled her with just as much fear as looking. The edge of the path seemed to drop sharply, drawing ever closer to her feet in the narrow beam of yellow light, until it felt like she was walking along the very line of the drop.

She stopped short with a yelp, head spinning from the sensation and whole body trembling. The sound made Ollie turn around sharply, placing himself as a barrier between her and the fall as she pressed her back firmly against the rock.

He took her by the shoulders, trying to get her to make eye contact instead of staring blankly at the sight, or lack of sight beyond him.

“Jess? Can you hear me?” he asked. “It’s alright, Jess. I’m right here, I won’t let you fall.”

Her blood roared in her ears and she saw his lips move but it was too loud for her to hear him.

When talking didn’t seem to work, he wrapped his arms around her, drawing her into a tight hug. Her fingers curled into his sweatshirt, clinging to him like a lifeline. Face pressed into the side of his neck she let out a sob, as the world spun around her much too fast.

The rest of the journey down to Ollie’s station wagon and much of the drive were a blur. Jess wasn’t completely unconvinced that he had somehow found a way to carry her down, although that was giving his physical strength more credit than he looked like it deserved. The storm picked up as they drove, clouds turning the sky to black, lit only by the occasional crash of lightning, and rain slamming against the roof and windows.

All too soon, the car stopped, parking in the narrow street in front of her building. They exited the car and promptly Ollie took her by the hand, lacing their fingers together. Not wanting to stand in the rain, she used the point of contact to drag him along, running as if she could dodge the water falling from the sky until they made it to her door. They stood there under the eaves, hair and clothing dripping, facing each other reluctantly, not wanting to say goodnight just yet.

“Tonight was…” he said, pausing.

“Amazing?” she finished, smiling and feeling the light heat of a blush on her cheeks.

“Yeah. That.” He smiled back, and looked for a moment (during which her heart beat like a bird trying to escape her chest) like he was going to kiss her again. “I should let you go inside…”

“Stay over,” she blurted out before she could consider the words.

“W-what?” he stared at her like she’d just grown an extra head or twelve. “Jess I can’t do that…”

“It’s late. And the weather’s bad. And I saw you yawning while we were driving back. I’d worry about you if you tried to go home now.”

“It’s just around the other side of the lake…”

“Yeah, but that’s like half an hour unless you drive recklessly. All it takes is drifting off for a second...please stay?”

“But...what will people think?”

“People,” she raised an eyebrow, “or your grandmother?”

“I don’t just mean her. I don’t want you to be treated like--”

“A slut?”

He shuffled and looked away.

“People aren’t that bad, you know. There are a handful of dicks, but most of town doesn’t give a shit.”

“I didn’t mean…” he frowned. “I’m a Sway. I know people don’t like my family. If you’re seen with me like that...I know what being an outcast feels like, and I don’t want you to have to feel that way.”

“Well I guess you'll just have to make sure no one sees, then.” She smirked, before she sighed. “Look, Ollie. We're grown adults. What we do at night, or any other time, or with whom is no one's business but our own.”

“I know but--”

“No. No buts. I wouldn't have invited you to sleep over if I didn't mean it, or I wasn't prepared for gossip and fallout. It’s up to you. I just would feel a lot better if you did.”

“You really want me to stay?”

She rolled her eyes and fixed him with a look rather than actually answering. The wet breeze sent a shiver over her as she turned to unlock the door, not waiting anymore for him to make a decision.

“And it’s not...too fast?”

She shrugged, taking him by the arm to pull him into the house and into a kiss. Her other hand threaded into his hair and his hovered over her hips as if he wasn’t quite sure he was allowed to touch her .

“Too fast is a myth,” she murmured, breath ghosting across his face. “Besides, I was inviting you into my house, not my bed.”

She’d lost count by now of the number of times she’d managed to make Ollie blush tonight, but each time you did was just as adorable as the first.

“Although, I was going to offer to take the couch,” she said over your shoulder as she led the way toward the furniture in question, “so I guess it was...also...into my bed…this is...I’m making it weird.”

“What? No!” he fumbled to reassure her. “I mean, no. You’re not, not no I won’t sleep in...I don’t want to, without you. Not that we have to sleep together. It’s just. It’s your bed.”

“God we’re a pair,” she said, laughing now as she dropped down and motioned for him to sit beside her. “Tripping over ourselves like romantic baby deer.”

“I just don’t want to mess this up,” he admitted sheepishly, sitting awkwardly perched on the edge of the cushion as if he was going to run at any moment.

“Is there...something to mess up?” she asked, reaching over to take his hand and lacing her fingers through his.

“I think so,” the words may have been a statement but his face was a question as he turned toward her a little more. “I don't want this to be some summer fling, Jess. I want it to be real.”

“Hey, summer flings can also be real. There was this one guy who…” she paused at Ollie's expression and shook her head, “never mind. The point is they're not mutually exclusive. But I appreciate the sentiment. And I’d really like that too.”

“What does that mean though?” he asked.

She paused. “That’s what we have to decide. But...not tonight. It’s late. We should go to bed and talk about it when we’re rested.” She fought back a yawn that emphasized her point as she stood.

He nodded, watching her turn and cross the room, eyes lingering low. It took him a moment to realize when she had stopped moving again.

“Well aren't you coming?”

“What?” he squeaked out.

“It occurs to me, the bed is big enough for two and way more comfortable than the couch.”

“I…”

“I just mean to sleep, for real. And, I guess, maybe cuddling?” She bit her lip nervously. “Unless you're not good with that…”

He stared for another long, awkward moment. “Even with my nightmares?”

She shrugged. “Yeah. I’ll deal. Or maybe having someone else beside you will help.”

Ollie scrambled to his feet, nearly tripping over himself in his rush to join her by the doorway. She laughed, lacing her fingers with his and leading him further through the apartment, silently marveling at how well things had gone, for a first date.

#it only took...almost 2 months to get to this. that's totally fine...#I had to do a lot of tweaking and pronoun conversion #so please (politely) hit me up if I missed anything #Oliver Sway x Jess O'Neill #Oliver Sway x OC #Song of Sway Lake fic #The Song of Sway Lake

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wthtorke · 3 years

Text

Wild Fire.

A lil background first, s/o is a pyromaniac and well, he’s murdered ppl as well lmao

Jesse wanted a bit of fun, so he started researching some crazy-ass motherfuckers like him because one, he was bored and two, someone had the gall to tell him he needed some friends.

Out of 10 files in his hands, he picks out two.

One of a strange masked man and another one that’s blurry as fuck because there’s a raging fire in the background, but he can make out the faint outline of a face.

All the info they had on them didn’t make one full page.

Jesse loved a good challenge.

So Jesse sets his people on the hunt for these men. The pyromaniac seemed to move a lot while the masked man had one very broad area of terror.

It was fun, being on the chase he set up, seeing rushed pictures, asking around, torturing people to get answers. It was fun.

It was really fun.

The masked man, 'The Collector' as he came to know, noticed something was off and disappeared while the pyromaniac called him from a disposable phone to ask why the fuck was he 'snooping up on his shit'.

Jesse couldn't recall the last time he'd laughed that hard. How the fuck did he even get the number? Well, it didn't matter now, it would later, but it didn't matter now.

Not as he set up a 'date' with the pyromaniac, surprised when he showed up, sitting across Jesse in some restaurant they agreed on. Jesse had at least 3 snipers ready to blow his brains up had he tried anything.

He let him know and in return, he also said the place was littered with explosives and that they'd both most definitely die.

Jesse has never had a more fun date.

As time went by, they grew closer and closer, Jesse liked the absolute chaos the man could bring up in such a short time and the awfully charming and interesting conversation he could muster up. But what he loved more was the contrast of that to the moans he made when Jesse was buried to the hilt in his ass.

They still had to find The Collector, however. Jesse's partner had one look at the file and made a small 'ooh, I know how to get him'.

Hell, he fucking did actually.

He was the one survivor in one of The Collector’s little games, pretending to be scared and even crying as he was shoved in a trunk, the micro-camera in his shirt giving Jesse one hell of a show.

Jesse worked quickly so his partner wouldn't, well, be tortured by Asa just yet. Jesse talked to Asa, and Asa didn't really have anywhere to run. Even if he killed the man he captured, Jesse would still know.

So he played their game, getting...really into it somewhere between letting his newest piece (who also seems to be his partner now) out of his trunk and months later when the same man kissed him breathlessly in the shower in one of Jesse's houses.

The three had done some work together, each having fun with victims and then having fun with each other back home.

One time, however, things didn't go according to plan.

Jesse doesn't really know where or when things went wrong. All he knew was the cold spike up his spine when he saw the knife sinking into their 'Butterfly's abs as two escapees ganged up on him after running from Jesse himself.

The last thing Jesse's brain registered was the distressed, painful cry that left his lover’s throat.

When he came back to himself, there was blood. Blood, bits of face, flesh, and scalp in his hands. His knives were filthy, his boots were beyond salvation.

And then Asa.

Asa shook his shoulder while still holding a very pale man in his arms, his hands struggling to press his own mangled shirt to his abs to contain all the blood.

The ringing stopped. Jesse got them out of there, calling the doctors he always had set and prepared in case things went wrong.

And things went very wrong.

The surgery lasted many hours, more than Jesse had the patience to wait for, Asa himself couldn't stay still.

'He's gonna be okay' was the phrase that had them both finally breathing again. Jesse rarely thought about other people, he didn't have to.

Normally, he'd say 'nice' and go out again, call to have news if he felt worried, and only set foot in there when the man could at least walk again.

But he couldn't do that this time.

He didn't want to, he couldn't bring himself to even think about leaving them now.

Asa took a few days off work and they wouldn't really leave the house, both knowing the man was resting upstairs, still unconscious from the surgery, still breathing shallowly.

The blade hadn’t gone too deep, he wouldn't have trouble eating or well, shitting.

''He pulled back a bit in time,' the doctor said, 'it was just a fright'.

When he woke up, they were both at his side.

He was... surprised like he didn't expect them to be there.

But happy, nonetheless.

As the days go by and he slowly recovers, he finds himself always in the company of one of them. Jesse pressed into his good side, arm wrapped around him, resting against the couch. Jesse's face buried into his neck, peppering kisses up and down his neck, stopping briefly to nip at his earlobe before a hand came up to his face, Jesse bringing his face closer to kiss his face while he himself just wanted to watch some damn TV.

Not that he was complaining, though. He definitely didn’t mind the open displays of affection he was getting. It was good to be pampered, and he was enjoying every second of it, sighing every time he thought about it ending when he got better.

Asa himself was more attentive, letting his hand drag back and forth as he caressed whatever part of him he could reach, be it his arm, his shoulder, letting his fingers drag into his hair, holding his hand when he was reading by his side and just holding him close as he dozed off to some documentary about spiders playing in the background.

As he got better and better, the wound fading into a pink scar, they were finally given the green sign to...resume their bedroom activities.

If he had thought he was being pampered, he definitely wasn't prepared for the amount of touching, praise, and kisses he got their first night back together.

Asa would whisper into his ear as Jesse kissed down his chest, stopping briefly over the fresh, sensitive scar, softly blowing over it, and smirking at the slight shiver he felt underneath him.

Usually, they’d go for over one round. There were three of them, rarely all of them felt sated with just one, but all three were pent up and tired, stressed from all the days of recovery so he soon found himself sandwiched between the two most dangerous murderers he'd ever met, panting, hot, sweaty and coming down from the high of their orgasms.

Jesse turned on the ac and just slumped back into bed, barely pulling up the skull-printed boxers around his hips as he wrapped his arms around the tired pyromaniac between them. Asa mostly let Jesse hold him, just draping an arm over him but making sure they tangled their legs, so he'd know he was also there.

That they weren't going anywhere, ever.

#Guess who's using slashers to cope?#yes me #I love Asa and Jesse tho pls bear w me #asa emory #asa x reader #asa emory x reader #jesse cromeans #jesse cromeans x reader #male reader #slasher #Slashers #slasher x reader #slasher/reader #slash fic #Headcanon #reader

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obxlife · 4 years

Text

Perceptions (Rafe x Reader)

A/N: This is like my third Rafe request and I have another one on the way and can I just say that I love writing about Rafe? Don’t get me wrong, he’s probably the most challenging character to write for, but, God, I love it. Also, this was for sure the hardest work I have ever done. Like almost every single character in this request is way more complicated than I’m used to, but I’m really glad I wrote it. I think this may not be my best work, but at least I tried, right?

Pairing: Rafe x Reader

Request: Hi! Could I request a Rafe x Reader where maybe the reader is Barry's younger sister but she is the complete opposite of him: she's basically a soft, innocent sunflower, and wants away from the life her brother lives. Somehow her and Rafe meet and he becomes totally smitten with her? Something with angst and fluff maybe?

Summary: You hated the fact that people would judge you because of your older brother. People would constantly assume you were a drug dealer, an A-class bitch, and a low life. Nobody ever tried to get to know what you were really like: sweet and innocent (for the most part). So when Rafe comes around one time when Barry is not home, you get mad at him for having the wrong perception of you.

Warnings: Mentions of drug use and drug dealing

PERCEPTIONS

No matter how hard you tried your brother seemed to have the uncanny ability to ruin your life in every way possible.

Admittedly, your life wasn’t very good, to begin with.

For starters, when you were two and Barry was four, your father beat your mom up so bad she had to go to the hospital for twenty-three weeks. The day she was supposed to come back she never showed up at the door of your dingy house. Both you and Barry cried that night.

Two years later, your dad was arrested under charges of child abuse (the bruises on both your’s and Barry’s bodies were enough evidence of that), and you and your sibling were left under the care of your aunt.

However, Aunt Jess was just as much as a mess as your parents had been. Sure, life with her was a bit better than with your father because there were no beatings, but there never seemed to be food on the table or warmth in the winter.

When Barry reached middle school he began to change. It seemed as if the sweet version of himself that you had grown up with was being hidden inside a dark room only for a meaner version to take over. This began to happen around the same time Aunt Jess’s boyfriend, Adam, came into the picture.

You and Barry were not stupid children. You knew Aunt Jess kept Adam around because he had a knack for getting a hold on drugs. You also knew that Aunt Jess was using him as a form of “protection”, as she knew no one on the Cut would ever dare raise a finger in his direction.

What you never noticed was how Adam was pushing his job onto Barry.

You never knew what had happened to your brother, and he never wanted to talk about whatever was going on inside his brain. So, in three short months, your relationship fell apart. It was soon after that Barry began to completely ruin your life.

See, unlike him, you had made friends that were actually a good influence and had a good family life. They lived in houses that weren’t perched upon wheels like yours was, and they had fridges that were always packed with food. They had clothes that shined and smelled nice, and their skin always seemed clean.

But Barry had to come in and scare them off by being the complete worst.

“Did you know Y/N and I are poor?” he would begin. “We’re only friends with you so we can steal all of your stuff!”

The tone he would use would imply that he was trying to be sweet, but you knew he just wanted you to suffer along with him. He wanted you to have no friends and feel no love just like him.

The thing with Barry was that the rest of the kids in his grade knew he had been trying and dealing drugs. They had seen Adam hand it to him in the morning so that Barry could sell it to the older boys that went to the high school that was just down the road from his own school. The kids that were in Barry’s grade wanted nothing to do with a drug dealer.

So Barry took out his anger on your relationships. He made every single one of your friends turn their back on you. For the first time in your life, you wanted to not be related to your brother.

But that was impossible and you knew it. So, you tried to be as different as him in every single way possible. You would refuse the drugs handed to you by Adam, you would not talk with curse words, and you would be gentle. You would be sweet towards your teachers, you would try to ace all of your classes, and you would show compassion towards others. But, try as you might, this did not change people’s perceptions about you.

Five lonely years later, Aun Jess died. Overdosed. Adam didn’t care. He didn't even prepare a funeral. He just took you and Barry and kept Aunt Jess’s house to himself. He began pushing the entire business onto Barry, telling him that he would soon be the one to take over.

“It’s gotta be you, kid. You’re doin’ amazin’ with it right now. Those boys you sell the drugs to? They got good money.”

Barry would just stare at Adam and laugh. “It’s what you taught me.”

“Yeah,” Adam would say. “Those Kooks got good money on them.”

As they would smoke a few cigarettes you would try to concentrate on your homework.

“Get ready, kid,” Adam called out to Barry. You were pretty sure he didn't know Barry’s name. Or your’s. “I’m heading out soon and I’m leaving you kids with some good shit to stay afloat for a while.”

Barry could only stare back at Adam. “What do you mean?”

Adam sighed. Your pencil wasn’t moving on your paper. He was leaving? While Barry was still a minor?

“Don’ worry about me, kid. I just feel guilty if I leave you nothin’.”

“When?” was the only thing you asked. The men turned towards you in surprise. You hadn’t spoken to either of them for a couple weeks now, as you tried to avoid as much interaction as possible with either of them.

“I don’ know yet. As soon as I feel like it.”

It was a month before Barry turned eighteen that Adam felt like it. Leaving.

The broken-down trailer that had once belonged to Aunt Jess now belonged to you. And you made sure to change things once Adam was gone.

“This is my room,” you made clear to Barry one August morning. Yous stood on the doorway of what used to be Adam’s room. “None of your buddies can come in here, okay?”

“What do you mean? I thought I was making the rules in this house. I want that room!” he screamed.

“Well, you ain’t getting it. I don’t want one single gram of whatever drug you’re dealing right now in here, and if one of your junkie friends ever comes in here, I’m screaming bloody murder.”

You shut the door in his face. After that day, you didn’t come out of your room for a week. You had been crying for days on end, wishing that somehow Barry would go back to being the sweet boy he had once been.

That was the problem. No matter how much you wanted Barry out of your life, you still loved and cared for him. No matter what fucked up things he did, you still wanted to know he was safe. And no matter how much you didn't want to, you would cry for the boy he had once been.

It had been two years since Adam had left when things seemed to change a little for the better. It had been an ordinary summer day. You had just graduated high school (with zero friends and zero colleges to go to because Barry had stolen your college money about four months ago) and you were tired of being cooped up in your room. You had gone outside and into the open air because Barry and his friends had finally left somewhere. You were just walking around the porch, trying to put things back where they belonged when you heard a bike.

“Oh, no,” you muttered thinking Barry was back. However, when you turned around, you saw a Kook taking off his helmet.

Huh, you thought. Didn’t Barry stop selling to the rich because they had tried to rat him out to the cops?

The Kook approached the porch where you were standing on, waiting for him to talk. He didn’t seem to notice you yet, as he tried to look into the windows of the trailer.

“Um, hi?” you said gaining his attention.

Startled, the boy turned around. You hadn’t expected him to be so... hot. His hair was gelled back and his green eyes stared at you before going back to the window of the trailer. He was tall - a lot taller than you (but you were Barry’s sister so that meant you were not that tall at all). Lastly, you noticed his muscles pressing against the cloth of his shirt.

Turning back towards you, the boy did a double-take and said, “Hey.”

The boy had sworn he had never met perfection, but you were pretty goddamn close. He really just felt entranced by you for a couple of seconds, and couldn’t help but feel like you were a gift in this world. He shook his head. Stop getting distracted, he thought. You’re only here for the coke.

He moved towards the other window of the trailer and peeked inside.

“May I help you with something?”

The boy shook his head before speaking, “I - I don’t think so. I’m looking for Barry. You know where he is?”

He seemed to be avoiding eye contact with you.

“No.”

You decided that this was probably one of Barry’s junkie friends that just so happened to also be a Kook. You wanted nothing to do with him.

You began to clean once again before the boy spoke again. “Do you know when he will be back?”

“Not really.”

“Oh.”

The boy continued to stare at you. He thought that you might be Barry’s sister. He had mentioned you once or twice when selling drugs.

“Hey, aren’t you Barry’s sister?”

You froze. You didn’t know Barry had been talking about you to his customers.

“Yes.”

The boy smiled. She’s hot and she sells? “Cool. So can you, like, sell me something?”

You’re anger spiked up. You hated it when people assumed you sold drugs just because your brother did. You hated how people just assumed things about you because of your brother.

“I don’t sell,” you muttered trying to reach for the doorso you could go back inside to your trailer house. The boy stopped you before you could continue.

The boy would never admit to it, but he didn't want to see you go so soon.

“C’mon,” he pleaded, “I won’t tell Barry anything.”

Now you were truly mad. However, you just sighed.

“Look, just because Barry sells drugs does not mean that I sell them too.”

The boy stared at you in disbelief. So she doesn’t sell? Huh. “Aren’t these things supposed to run in the family?”

You nearly choked on your own spit. “Um, I’m sorry. What?”

The boy shrugged, thinking that maybe that was the wrong thing to say. “Isn’t that how it works?”

You shook your head violently. “No. No, it’s not.”

You tried to reach the door again, but the boy stopped you. Again.

“Okay, fine. Don’t sell me any drugs. Just tell Barry Rafe was here.”

With that, the boy left. Rafe? What a strange name, you thought.

Rafe, on the other hand, was smitten by you. He couldn’t believe he had really made that much of a fool of himself. That was why he had decided to truly leave.

The next time he came around he was surprised you opened the door. His breath caught in his throat and he coughed, trying to breathe again.

“Oh. It’s you.”

“Yeah.”

Turning around, you called out for Barry.

When your brother appriached the door, you left to go back to your room.

“What’s up, Country Club?” Barry belted out, wrapping a hand around Rafe’s shoulder. He was still thinking about you. “You here for that good stuff?”

“Yeah, yeah.”

“You got my money?”

“About that...”

Barry shook his head. “No money, no drugs, Country Club. You know how it is.”

From your window, you stared at your brother and the blond boy. Why hadn’t he left your mind since the last time he was here?

You couldn’t hear the words exchanged between your brother and Rafe, but you could tell they seemed to be arguing. However, Rafe managed to convince Barry of whatever he was trying to convince him of. After that, he left.

But that was not the end of Rafe. You began to see him a lot. Heading towards your house, or when you were out in town. It seemed as if you two just continued to bump into each other. It was through these many bumps that you began to form a relationship of friendship, though both you and Rafe truly felt more than that.

You had fallen for him about two months after meeting him. It wasn’t as if he did something specific to make you fall for him. You just simply did.

It was almost the same way for him. There was not one thing in particular that made you latch onto his heart, but he still gave it to you.

There was only one thing that bothered you about him, and it was the fact that he was using drugs. It wasn't a topic either of you talked about or tried to talk about around the other, but it was safe to say that if he wasn’t doing drugs, you would have never met.

Despite this, you were sure you could help him. You just knew, from what he had told you about his life, that if you showed him how much you loved him he would manage to work his way away from coke.

You truly believed this, because, in fact, you had no clue as to how bad Rafe really was. It wasn’t until weeks later that you realized that Rafe might have been too far down the road for saving.

He had shown up at your door desperate for Barry. He was acting in a frantic manner, as if something had shocked him or made him want to calm down with the help of coke.

He had barged right through you into your house, shoving drawers open and turning the already messy trailer even messier.

“Rafe!” you yelled. “What is going on?”

“I - I just know there has to be some. There has to.”

“What?”

“Maybe here? No, no. In the drawer? Where... where...”

The blond continued to mutter as his hands shook. “I need - I need some right now.”

You stared at him in shock. “Need what?”

He was becoming more and more frantic with every second that passed. “I need it. I need some.”

You couldn’t do anything. What was wrong with him?

“Coke... coke,” he muttered. “Where - hidden. Yes, yes.”

“There isn’t any,” you said after gaining enough courage to speak. “He took it all with him. Said it was the last of his deliveries for a while.”

Rafe shook his head. “N - No. No. There has t - to be some here...”

“Rafe,” you whispered.

“I need some!” he suddenly exploded. Grabbing things and throwing them around, breaking the plates that were on your counter. “I fucking need some!”

“Rafe,” you whimpered. You were scared. What else was he going to throw around? How much time was going to pass until an object eventually hit you?

“No! Stop! I need some! I can’t fucking think without it!”

“What are you talking about?”

He stomped towards you, “Where is it?” He grabbed onto your face. “Tell me! I need it!”

He pushed you down onto the couch, as you whimpered from the pain in your cheeks. “I don’t know,” you sobbed.

Rafe was panicking. His breath had shortened as he pressed a hand against his chest. “I - I can’t...”

He sounded so winded. He suddenly dropped and curled up into a ball. His breathing was erratic and was not going back to normal. Swallowing your fear you shifted towards him. Your palm paused before touching his back, afraid he might hurt you. You finally decided to press it against the boy's cotton shirt.

As soon as your hand touched his back a sob escaped past his lips. “I just can’t do it.”

You rubbed your hand up and down in a circular motion. Your other hand came around to his hair, shuffling your fingers through it in what you hoped was a relaxing motion.

“Do - do you want to talk about it?”

Rafe shook his head and sobbed. However, he did begin to speak about it. “Barry cut me off. And I just have been so fucking lost without it.”

You sighed, mad at yourself for not having noticed this.

“And - and now, my dad - he kicked me out.”

not knowing how to comfort him, you pressed your lips to his hairline. “You’re okay. You’ll be okay.”

At this, Rafe shrugged you off. “Don’t say that. Nothing is okay. I - I can’t get my shit together and I’m falling apart -”

Rafe was cut off by your hug. A short time later he hugged you back, and you felt a tear fall down your cheek. You just wanted Rafe to be okay.

He continued to sob for a long time. You just held him, letting the shirt you were wearing become drenched in tears. You had no clue what to say to make him feel better so you only remained quiet.

When his sobs turned into sniffles, you pulled him back a bit. You wiped the tears from his eyes. “I’m sorry.”

You frowned. “For what, Rafe?”

He sighed. “Scaring you and throwing things around.”

You smiled softly, but the smile didn’t quite reach your eyes. “It’s okay.”

“No,” Rafe shook his head, “it’s not. It’s not okay that the one thing that calms me down other than you is coke.”

You had stopped listening halfway through his sentence. “Do you mean that?”

“What?” About coke?”

You laughed at his awful attempt at a joke. “No. About me.”

“Oh,” he replied, dumbfoundedly. “Uh, yeah.”

You smiled and hugged him once again. “I’m going to say this really fast, but I really like you.”

Rafe tensed in your arms. “Tell me you’re not joking.”

You smiled against his shoulder. “I’m not.”

Rafe pulled back with a smile on his face but it fell. “No. No, no, no. You can't like me.”

“What?” you asked, offended.

“I’m terrible. And you - you’re perfect. And sweet. And kind. And so unlike me or Barry or anyone else. And you’re special.”

“So?”

“So, Y/N, I ruin every single good thing in my life. And I don’t want to ruin you.”

You stilled. Was that really the reason? Your heart soared at the same time it clenched in pain.

“Well,” you began, “you don’t get to determine what I do and don’t deserve.”

“Y/N -”

“No,” you held your hand out. “Let me finish.”

“Okay.”

“Trust me when I say this, Rafe,” you tried to say without breaking into tears. “But you are so much more than you think you are. You are also kind. And sweet. And special. And I want to be with you.”

Rafe smiled once again before looking down at the ground. “I want to be with you...”

He paused, almost as if for dramatic effect. “But I want to be better for you.”

You nodded your head, but you didn’t fully understand. He could tell because of the confused look in your eyes.

“I don’t want you to be with me yet because I want you to be with a better version of myself. I want to be better for you.”

At this, you smiled once again and threw your arms around him. You sighed happily and whispered in his ear, “I’ll wait for however long it takes.”

Rafe wrapped his arms around your waist once again for that day.

“I’m so happy my first perception of you was wrong,” he muttered.

“Me too,” was all you could say.

#outer banks #obx #obx netflix #rafe cameron #drew starkey

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queenlists · 4 years

Text

Wedding Mishap

Request: I was wondering if I could request a Sam x Reader fic where the reader thinks that Sam does lover her anymore after he calls her Jess. Much angst and fluff please! - @biscuitfam

Date: 06/26/2020

A/N: Thank you for the request @biscuitfam <3 Thank you all for your support! I really hope you all enjoy this ✌ masterlist

Tag list: @morguleth @yeolliedokai

Today was magical.

Everything I had ever hoped for.

Everything I had ever dreamed of.

The lights were bright, but not too bright.

The venue resembled a magical fairytale.

Plates full of delicious food.

Beautiful bouquets.

Smiles all around.

Everything was just...perfect.

The clinking of glass grabbed my attention. Sam was standing up, gently hitting his knife against the glass as everyone turned to look at him. Clearing his throat, he smiled "I want to thank everyone for coming tonight! I'll make this quick since everyone is enjoying themselves, but I just wanted to say that I didn't think I'd ever have this night. Me getting married? I thought that was only in my wildest dreams, but here we are. It's all thanks to my beautiful wife,"

I smiled at Sam, trying to not cry for the thousandth time today "Oh, Sam," I whimpered out. "You're my absolute everything. You're the light of my life. The girl of my dreams. I can not ever express how much you really mean to me. I love you so much, Jess,"

The whole venue dropped silent.

No one moved.

No one spoke.

No one even blinked.

Gasps escaped from the mouths of almost everyone in the room.

Tears escaped my eyes as I hissed in air "Jess?"

Sam opened his mouth, but no words came out.

"Of all nights, you call me Jess? In front of everyone too?" My voice progressively grew louder and louder until I was yelling. Hot tears escaping my eyes with every word.

Sam gulped as his eyes cried out for Dean who was walking towards us, "Y/n, I-"

"Oh now you know my name?" I scoffed, quickly standing up and running out of the room.

I could hear the hushed whispers erupt around the room as I left.

Littering the streets with my wedding attire, I felt the weight lift off.

Every piece held a lie.

Every string.

Every thread.

Every stitch.

Every bead.

Every cent spent.

It all was for what?

For what?

The cold air began to nip at my skin as the sun went down. I knew everyone would be searching for me by now, but all I wanted was a drink.

I flopped down on the springy motel bed as the alcohol buzzed through my body, making my head feel light and my body very warm. I laid on the bed in the loose tank top and oversized shorts that I had bought along with a variety of comfort food, letting the warmth cradle me. "Who spends their wedding night alone? Me, of course!" I laughed out loud to myself, shaking my head as tears streamed down my face again.

I knew about Jess before Sam and I were even together.

Even years later, her death still hung over him like a dark cloud, spewing nothing but rain.

She meant the world to him.

"She's beautiful. Is she your sister?" I smiled as I picked up a picture of Sam and a woman smiling together.

"Uh..no. She's actually my ex," Sam rubbed the back of his neck as he walked closer.

"Your ex?" I emphasized, trying to make sure that I heard him correctly.

"Yes,"

I bit my lip as I stared at them together. They look so happy together. He obviously still loves her if he has a framed picture on his bookshelf. Clearing my throat, I set the picture back down carefully "I think I should go,"

"Jess passed away years ago," Sam's voice quivered. I felt my heart drop as I turned my head to look at him. He visibly choked down a sob as he bit down on his jaw. His eyes became watery as they darted around the room, looking everywhere but at me.

"I found her. I never got over it," Sam balled his hands into tight fists as he fought back his tears.

"Hey, it's okay!" I rushed over to him, wrapping him up in a gentle hug.

"It's hard to talk about," Sam sniffed.

I didn't respond. I didn't know what to say other than the classic "I'm sorry,"

"No, it's okay," Sam groaned before chuckling, swiping away a few stray tears. "What a first date, huh?"

I comforted him that night. I held him in my arms as he talked about her. As he cried in my arms. He exposed his vulnerability to me at such an early stage in our relationship. He told me all about her. Was I selfish to think that I could possibly numb his pain? That the pain of losing Jess would somehow vanish because of me? I don't know, probably.

My thoughts were interrupted by a soft knock at the door. I slowly got up and crept to the door. "Babe?" I could hear Sam's voice followed by another knock, harder than before.

I opened the door for him, letting him in before closing it shut behind him. "How'd you find me?" my tone was harsher than I had intended. "When there's a runaway bride stripping her clothes throughout the town, people notice" Sam was still in his tux, his face flushed and his eyes tired. He ran a hand through his hair as he looked around, placing a bag down on the bed. I chewed on the inside of my lip, watching Sam "Why did you call me Jess?" "It slipped out,"

"It slipped out. Alright," I nodded, crossing my arms across my chest. Sam rolled his eyes, heavily sighing "It was a mistake, Y/n. I'm sorry," "I bet you're very sorry," I shook my head, digging my nails into my arm as I remembered the look on everyone's face when Sam called me Jess. Sam closed his eyes in annoyance "Why are you acting like this? You're being...you're acting like a-" "Please, tell me what I'm acting like! I'd love to hear it," I interrupted Sam, gritting my teeth.

"It's so hard to talk to you right now. You're not even trying to hear me out! How can you expect me to make this right if you won't even listen?" Sam nearly yelled out. You humiliated me in front of everyone, that's why!" I cried out. "I humiliated you. I humiliated myself. I fucked up and I know that. I can't take that back no matter how much I want to!" Sam's voice hitched as he continued to speak "I thought I lost you. No one could find you. You left your phone on the table, so we couldn't even call you. You completely vanished. Then I saw your veil, your bouquet, your rings, bits and pieces of your dress scattered on the ground," a tear slid down Sam's face as he took my wedding and engagement ring out of his pocket. "The thought of losing you hurt more than anything in my entire life," Sam whimpered, looking at the rings that were resting on the palm of his hand before balling his hand into a fist.

"You never called me Jess before. Ever. Throughout our entire time together, you never did that. Why now? Why?"

Sam stood there, still and stiff. His lip quivered as tears ran down his face, slipping to the ground from his chin "I thought I was going to marry her. I thought she'd be Mrs. Winchester. I thought I'd have my apple pie life with her. When I thought about my future, it was her"

"Oh, so I'm just the woman you settled for because the woman of your dreams isn't here? Thanks for clarifying," I scoffed, gathering my stuff and stuffing them in a grocery bag. "Do you even love me, Sam?" I looked at him before walking to the door. He stood there, staring at me with his mouth slightly open. Tears flooding from his eyes. I turned my head, not wanting to see his pain and not wanting him to see mine. Every second of silence stung my heart. I placed my hand on the cold doorknob, waiting to hear anything. My heart painfully thudded in my chest, it seemed to be so loud in this silent room. I placed my forehead on the door, counting down from twenty. Hoping that by the time I reached zero, Sam would say anything. Anything at all.

"Please don't leave me," Sam whimpered. I turned around, my stomach twisting as I looked at Sam. He stood tall, but I could see that he was crumbling into pieces. "I don't know what to say to fix it. I don't know how to describe what I feel or how much I love you. She was my world before I met you and now you're my universe. When we met, I counted down the seconds until we saw each other again. I felt...I feel complete with you by my side. You're my Mrs for a reason. I want you to stay mine forever. I love you so much. I'm sorry for hurting you. I'm sorry for embarrassing you. I'm sorry for it all. There's nothing I can do to go back, but I'm so sorry"

"We can't open it until our first fight," I grabbed the wooden box from Dean. "I just won't say what I read!" Dean reached for the box again. "Nope! Not until our first fight," I grabbed duct tape, wrapping it around the box. "Why do you need a fight box anyway?" "I..I saw it online and thought it was cute," I shrugged "I guess it's to show how much you truly love one another. It'll help the anger not blind us from seeing it's us versus the problem." Dean looked from me to Sam, exchanging looks with one another. "This will save us from a big fight one day. You'll see,"

Sam's eyes lit up as he grabbed the bag, pulling out the wooden box "I think this will help," I watched as Sam pulled out the envelope with my name on it. "Here," Sam handed it to me as he sat and watched. "Are you opening yours?" I began opening the envelope. "No because I'm the one who messed up and I know you love me. I don't need to hear it from past Y/n,"

I opened the envelope, revealing the paper. Sam watched me as I opened the paper up, reading:

Hey beautiful,

Since you're reading this, I'm assuming we're not getting along right now. Just know that I love you. You're my everything and more. No matter what's happening right now. No matter what I'm saying out of anger or pain. No matter what I love you. I only see you. You've been the highlight of my life since you walked into it. You're my wife for a reason. I couldn't envision life without you.

If I did something, I'm so sorry. I may not be saying all the right words, but I do love you and would never want to break your heart.

I love you and I definitely owe you a date night.

I love you forever,

Sam

My tears dripped onto the paper as I smiled, closing it "So when's that date night?"

Sam's frown twitched into a big smile "Could it be an extended honeymoon?" "I'd love that, Mr Winchester!" I grinned as Sam stood up, walking towards me. "Me too, Mrs Winchester" He placed his hands on the sides of my face, kissing me gently on the lips.

"You're my forever"

107 notes · View notes

bcwrites · 3 years

Text

Forgotten Summer Chapter 3

At Home

AO3 FF

Author’s Note: The encounter with the Bowers Gang was supposed to happen in the last chapter, but I felt the chapter was getting too long, so I decided to put the scene in this chapter. Also, I changed Melanie’s faceclaim to Riele Downs.

P.S.: Yes, I know it’s been a long time since I’ve updated this story. Life got in the way.

Racism Trigger Warning: The n-word is used.

The Bowers Gang began approaching Melanie and Mike. “Mike,” Melanie called to her cousin.

He looked up from his book. “Yeah,” he asked.

Before she could respond, Henry had only reached them. “What’s up, niggers,” Henry taunted.

Mike gulped. “What do you want, Henry,” he said in a quivering voice.

“A better question is why are you two sitting at the counter?”

“Because we wanted to.”

“You know, when my dad was a kid you people weren’t allowed to sit here.”

“Well, we can now,” said Melanie under her breath.

Unfortunately, Henry heard her; he grabbed her arm. “What did you say,” he demanded.

“Nuh-nothing,” she stammered.

He gripped her arm tighter. “You said something.”

“Let her go,” Mike said. He grabbed Henry’s arm and attempted to pry it from Melanie’s. Patrick and Belch pushed him back, however.

Henry ignored Mike and maintained his attention on Melanie. “If you’re going to be rude, maybe I should…”

“What the hell do you think you’re doing,” a female voice interrupted. It was her aunt.

The appearance of Jessica Hanlon caused Henry to loosen his grip on Melanie. She immediately took the opportunity to pull her arm away.

“None of your business,” Henry snapped at Jessica.

“She’s my niece. It’s entirely my business,” said Jessica, crossing her arms.

“Is there a problem here,” questioned Sarah. She had noticed what was going on and came over.

“I don’t know.” Jessica gave Henry a stern look. “Is there, young man?”

Henry looked between the two women. Eventually, he rolled his eyes and said, “Whatever.” He turned to his friends. “Let’s go.”

Henry walked away and his friends followed behind. Melanie watched them leave. Patrick looked back and gave her a salacious wink; she shivered.

Jessica put her hand on Melanie’s shoulder. “Are you okay, honey?”

Melanie nodded. “I’m fine.” She wasn’t, but she didn’t want to admit it.

Luckily, her aunt didn’t call her on it. Instead, she looked at Mike. “What about you, sweetie?”

“I’m okay,” Mike replied. Melanie was sure he wasn’t being honest either.

“I’ll go check on your order,” said Sarah. “You want anything, Jess?”

“Yeah, I’ll have a diet Coke,” she responded.

“Alright.” Sarah left and went into the kitchen.

Jessica took a seat next to Mike. She made small talk with her son and niece. Every so often she would cast a glance at them. Melanie figured she was making sure they were okay. Bowers had always been a thorn in their family’s side.

Sarah eventually returned with their drinks. A short time later, she brought their tater tots. Other than occasionally answering Jessica’s questions, Melanie and Mike ate in silence. The encounter with Bowers had soured their moods.

-TFS-

Melanie, Mike, and Jessica entered their house. They all carried a paper grocery bag. “Will baby, we’re home,” Jessica shouted to her husband.

“I’m in the kitchen,” he shouted back.

“Good, you can help us put away groceries!”

“Yes, ma’am!”

The trio entered the kitchen. Will Hanlon was drying his hands. Melanie noticed a bowl of strawberries by the sink. He had probably been washing them.

Jessica placed her bag on the counter while Mike and Melanie placed theirs on the table. They began putting away the groceries. Will walked over to his wife and kissed her on the lips. “Eww,” said Mike and Melanie.

“Oh, hush,” Jessica said, rolling her eyes.

The two of them giggled. They began to silently put away groceries. While doing so, Melanie noticed her aunt and uncle were whispering to each other. She couldn’t help but wonder if they were talking about her. She had overheard them talking about her a few times before. It was always the same thing. Was she okay? Should they talk to her about it?

If they were talking about her, she knew it was probably because of the incident with Bowers. He had always been a thorn in their side.

“Ow,” exclaimed Melanie. She had been so lost in her thoughts, she had hit her foot against something. She also dropped the loaf of bread she had been holding.

Mike turned towards her. “You okay,” he asked.

“I’m fine.”

Melanie’s exclamation had also gotten Will and Jessica’s attention. “You sure, honey,” Jessica asked.

“Yeah,” assured Melanie. She bent down to pick up the bread.

After about four minutes, they finished with the groceries. Mike went to his room while Melanie decided to call Beverly. She dialed Bev’s number; she picked up after two rings.

“Hello,” Bev answered.

“It’s Melanie,” she said.

“I’m sorry, you have the wrong number.” Melanie frowned. That meant Mr. Marsh was home and awake. He shared the same opinion of her family that the Bowers did.

“Okay, call me back when you can,” Melanie said.

“It’s no problem,” said Beverly.

Melanie hung up the phone. She went upstairs to her room to grab her camera. She then headed outside. It was warm outside; she wished that the weather would stay exactly like this all summer.

She started to snap pictures around the farm. She took pictures of the crops, the animals, and several other things. After a while, she just decided to walk around. Melanie enjoyed the sounds of the farm; it was relaxing for her.

She made a face. The normal sounds she heard were interrupted by music. At first, she thought it was coming from the house, but she soon realized it was coming from the woods. The song sounded familiar; she began walking towards it. Melanie stopped right where the woods and farm met.

She finally recognized the song. It was My Girl by The Temptations. It had been a while since she had heard it. Her father would sing it to her and her mother; they would dance around the living room as he did. She smiled at the memory.

Her happiness quickly gave way to confusion. Why was the song playing in the woods? The only radio her aunt and uncle had was in the living room. Was someone with a radio hanging out in the woods? It wasn’t uncommon in Derry.

“Hello,” she called out. No response. “Is someone out there?” Still no response.

She was about to walk into the woods when she heard uncle yell, “Melanie!”

Melanie jumped back from the forest. She hoped her uncle hadn’t seen her. He didn’t like her and Mike going into the woods without him or Aunt Jessica. She turned around to look. She let out a breath of relief; he hadn’t seen her. She turned back to the woods. The song had stopped playing. She figured whoever was in there had her uncle and turned off the radio.

“Melanie,” Uncle Will called out again.

“Coming,” she yelled back. She jogged back to the house.

There, Uncle Will stood on the porch waiting for her. “You have fun sightseeing,” he teased.

“Yeah, I saw a mountain lion.”

“Ooh, I hope you took lots of photos.”

“Yep.”

Uncle Will chuckled. “Well, you can tell Bev all about it. She’s on the phone for you.” He ruffled her hair.

“Thanks.” Melanie walked inside. She picked up the phone and put it to her ear. “Hey, Bev.”

“Hey, Mel,” her friend greeted back. “Sorry, I couldn’t talk before.”

“It’s fine. Where did you disappear to?”

“I went to smoke.”

“Ah.”

“I also ran into Greta.”

That couldn’t be good. “What happened?”

“She threw garbage on me,” Beverly grumbled.

Melanie made a face. “Gross.”

“Yeah, but I don’t want to talk about that. How’d it go with Bill science?” Bev’s voice turned singsongy. She was well aware of Melanie’s crush.

Melanie smiled. “He invited me to sit with his friends.”

“Tell me everything.”

“Well, Richie is definitely high energy…”

#ff: the forgotten summer #oc: melanie bennett #tw racsim #n word tw #it oc

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classic80sand90smovieloves2 · 4 years

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Being Laney's friend and Simon having a crush on you would include~

(Requested by anonymous)

(Hope this is what you wanted!)

- Laney doesn’t have many friends and she’s a loner at heart but if you’re one of the few friends she has she likes to spend time together. So you and Laney meet when you’re young and you grow up inseparable, going through all your awkward phases together.

- Most days you end up at her house where you; by default, wind up spending a lot of time with her little brother. You don’t think much of him, he’s practically a child to you even though you aren’t much older. But because he’s your best friends little brother and a sweet yet annoying kid, you’re nice to him and that’s what makes him fall for you.

- You’re his first glimpse at what a girl other than his sister is like. You’re pretty, you’re smart, you treat him like a human even though you’re older and much more mature, and you talk to him about your shared interests without thinking he’s just a stupid kid. He thinks you’re the most amazing girl he’s ever met and none of the girls in his grade even come close to you.

- Growing up he had an inkling of a crush on you; every now and again he’d look at you and think since when was she all pretty? But it was his last year or two of middle school that his attraction grew into a full blown crush.

- He entered high school with the hope that his new found maturity would set him in the same ball park as you. You were peers now after all.

- He decided he would attempt to woo you but he knew that would be sort of difficult. He wasn’t in the friend zone he was in the little brother zone and that was near impossible to escape.

- But for the years he knew you, you had never dated anyone so that meant either a) you hadn’t found anyone who interested you or b)you were gay. One was far easier to deal with than the other. He didn’t know what he could do if you were gay but he did know that he could find out (and already pretty much knew) about all of your interest and “deepest desires”.

- So he set off on his mission, first he had to genuinely befriend you, that was easy enough you were at his house nearly everyday and you went to the same school now. All he really had to do was spend some alone time with you and make you see him the same way you saw his sister and Jesse.

- You didn’t think much of Simon hanging around you more, he wasn’t the most popular kid and he always joined you and Laney when you were together. Hell you sort of thought it was a survival tactic: be around an older girl and don’t get made fun of as much. Either way you welcomed him whenever he came around at school and went over to the Boggs house to play video games with him while Laney was at work.

- Over time you grew to like him a lot more. You’d never disliked him of course just thought of him as well...Laney’s younger brother: an alright thing you had to deal with to be friends with her. But now he’d grown up, matured, and became a fun companion.

- After he had infiltrated your friend group he could officially start the process of making you fall for him. That was the tricky part. All he knew about romance was pointers from movies and kids making out in the hallway. But he had to try his best.

- He tries to impress you with his gaming and roller skating skills, tries to make you laugh, shows you his advanced knowledge of the things you’re into (that he rapid fire learned about in a night), and compliments you the best he can without making it obvious that he’s in love with you.

“Sick shirt, I love that movie.”

“You’re uh, you’re hair, I dig it. Looks nice today.”

- Laney isn’t sure how she feels about Simon hanging around you. She’s sure that you’re oblivious to whats happening but she knows her brother and she’s seen his attempts for what they truly are. She tells him to buzz off as much as she can but you’re too nice to push him away like she does so ultimately he’s allowed to stay.

- His attempts at actually flirting with you never work because you just think he’s messing around but he does like the feeling of being able to say what he wants and picture that your sarcastic or joking responses are actually you being interested in him.

- He sneaks glances at you whenever he can. In the kitchen with Laney? He’s at the counter watching you cook something. Playing video games with him? He tries his best to play while his eyes dart over to you close beside him.

- He uses any excuse to get you close to him like asking for your help with homework or convincing you to do something with him.

- He turns into you’re errand boy even though you never really ask him to do anything for you like you’ll ask if you can have a drink and he’s already racing to the kitchen and asking what you prefer. Or you forget your book in the lunchroom and he’s already running to get it and promising to give it to you after your next class.

- If you stand up to his bullies for him he will blurt out that he loves you but you just laugh and ruffle his hair.

- Compliment him and his mood is 100% better; he can’t stop smiling for like the rest of the day.

- He’s so cocky and proud when you hug him, especially if it’s in public.

- He’s speechless and awkward when he sees you all dressed up or in some kind of provocative outfit (like a swimsuit or short shorts).

- He gets very uncomfortable and quiet when you mention offhandedly that some guy in your class is cute. He tries his best to deter you from thinking they’re worthy of you like making up rumors about them.

- You start to get the idea that he’s into you around this time. It’s not exactly hard to see but you were a bit willfully ignorant before this. You honestly think it’s kind of cute, he isn’t ugly by any means and you’ve never really had someone crush on you before.

- You try to pull a confession out of him just to see if you’re right in your assumptions but he usually makes an excuse to dash out of the room when you’re close to getting what you want.

- He tells Laney about his feeling to which she basically just responds “Well obviously, literally everyone knows Simon.” but regardless she gives him her blessing if you actually wind up agreeing to date him.

- So finally he asks to talk to you alone one day so you invite him over to your house and sit on your bed while he rambles on about how he’s in love with you and that Laney knows and doesn’t care, etc, etc, etc. You’re still a little shocked to hear his confession but you smile, kiss him on the cheek and tell him that he’s adorable. He sits very shocked for a minute wondering if he’s in a dream before a big smile spreads across his face and he asks you out on a date to which you happily agree.

- After that he’s nearly jumping for joy as he races out of your house yelling that he’ll call you before he makes his way home to tell his family the amazing news.

#shes all that #shes all that imagine #shes all that headcanon #shes all that headcanons #simon boggs #simon boggs imagine #simon boggs headcanons #simon boggs headcanon #90s imagine #90s movie imagine #90s movie headcanons

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parkkrys · 4 years

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Hello! I'm new to your blog and I was going through your star wars tag and I came across the 30 au star wars request of yours?. I wonder if you ever heard of Mermaid au? it's okay if you don't BUT can I request Cody/Rex and(or) Jesse/Kix? I have to gather my self for a long time before typing this as fast as I can AFGSHDHDH HNGGGGG--

You are adorable!! I apologize for the late answer but here you are! I hope you enjoy!

Kix has always been fascinated by the surface even when he was a small baby Mer. His mother would always smile as she held him, listening to everything he would say about the topic and chime in a few words as she would do his hair. He would even listen to what his older siblings would say about the surface with wide eyes for hours.

“How old does humans live for buir?”

She chuckled as she kissed his forehead. “They have short lifespans compared to us Mers. They only live up to a hundred years while we live for thousands. It’s interesting isn’t it?” She whispered as she pulled the soft sea leaf around him.

“Be careful Kix, that mind of yours will get you into trouble one day.” She whispered as she tucked him into bed. “Ni kar'tayl gar darasuum ad’ika.”

It was only a few days after that he lost his mother to humans. He was struck by the thought of something so wonderous, something so breathtaking could be so evil. But as he grew older, he had the thought that if some Mer’s can be bad but some are good then it must apply to the humans as well. Some are bad and do horrible things, but most of them must be good in some way.

It was tradition in the Mer-folk culture that once a Mer turns a certain age they were allowed to go up to the surface, just to see how dangerous the ‘man’ can really be. Most Mer-people feared the man that wandered on the surface from the stories that the older Mer-folk would tell when they were young.

Kix has heard all the stories and it always worried the others with just how fascinated he was with them. He didn’t scream and cower like the other Mers, instead he would ask questions. But through it all Kix could always count on one person to be there beside him.

Rex has always been his best friend throughout the years and even Kix had to admit that he grew into a beautiful Mer with his buzzed blonde hair and his dark royal blue tail. He wasn’t surprised at all when Rex announced that he was being courted by the second in commands Ghost clan. He has met Cody with his stupid golden tail that took his breath away, but he knew that they would compliment each other very well.

“Rex?”

Rex hummed as he looked up from the collection that Kix has collected over the years. “What’s up?”

Kix hesitated as he laid on the sand, soaking up the warmth as he stared up at the never-ending blue of the ocean. “What did you do on your day to the surface?”

Rex snorted as he looked over towards him. “I observed, I analyzed and I saw what I saw. I told you this, I didn’t see what they told me. I saw people laughing, dancing, walking on two legs. I saw a whole new world that doesn’t make sense to me.”

Kix smiled as he listened to Rex ramble trying to picture it. “Look, Kix I know you are excited for your day on the surface but please do be careful. Your curiosity could get you into trouble.”

“I know.” Kix said as he rolled over, settling his chin on his crossed arms as he looked up at Rex. “I just can’t wait to see it.”

“Just be careful. I can’t lose you.”

Kix groaned as he pushed himself up, swimming over to settle down beside him. He always envied the easy way that Rex could admit things and to show emotions as well as he did. Well lately he hasn’t considering how many times Kix had to listen to him gush about Cody but he saw the way how emotionless Cody would brighten up when he saw Rex. It was sweet Kix has decided when he met Cody for the first time.

“I know vod, I wouldn’t leave you without a fight.” Kix muttered as he wrapped an arm around him. Rex hummed as he leaned his head on top of Kix’s, a move that always annoyed Kix to no end as he shoved a laughing Rex away from him. “I am leaving now.” He huffed out as he moved to swim towards the exit but was trapped as Rex threw his arms around him, giving him a squeeze before letting go.

“Just try to stay safe tomorrow yeah?”

“Yeah, of course. Don’t worry about its Rex or you will make yourself sick like you usually do.” He made sure to give him a stern look, smirking lightly at Rex’s sheepish look. He knew exactly what Kix was talking about considering how he made himself sick for hours when he thought Kix has gotten himself kidnapped by another clan. Which he clearly didn’t because he had everything in control thank you very much.

When the day finally came for Kix to make his first and only trip (we will see about that Kix snorted mentally) to the surface. He couldn’t keep his nerves calm as he listened to everything the elder was babbling on about. Stay safe, don’t go near humans, you only get to stay up there for one hour, all the basic rules that every Mer knows when it is their time to go up to the surface.

“Just be careful verd’ika.” The elder eventually signed, knowing that Kix was not listening to him. It wasn’t long until Kix was making his way to the surface, stopping briefly to wonder at the ship that was sailing up above. He has gone through the ships on the ocean floor but seeing one that was above on the surface was a new wonder as he swam forward.

Taking a deep breath, he slowly breached the surface of the water, breathing lightly to test the air as he watched the bright lights on the ship and the soft looking sails move with the breeze. He shivered lightly when the cool breeze brushed along his skin, making him feel chilled in a different way that he wasn’t used to.

The thought didn’t last long as he heard music playing and he couldn’t help but to silently and very carefully climb up onto the ropes to peak over the edge to see what was happening on the deck, gasping lightly at the sight of people dancing, laughing, smiling. It was a sight that he knew would never forget or stop thinking about as he continued watching.

He didn’t know how this man got his attention but he stopped as he noticed one of the humans silently watching the crowd, smiling at what the others were saying to him and his breath hitched. The human was different from the others with the black ink that marked along his skin, maybe a symbol for something important Kix would have guessed but it was his gentle eyes that had his attention.

The way that he watched his people, those soft golden eyes that were gentle but firm and, in some cases, mischievous as well.

He has never seen someone express so many emotions with their eyes before and he couldn’t help but to lean closer.

“Hey Jesse! Stop standing around and get your ass over here!”

He flailed slightly as he darted quickly to hide, his breaths hard as he listened to footsteps wondering overhead. It wasn’t like he was scared of them, more like he was worried he would actually get caught but as he once again looked over the edge he watched as Jesse moved, smiled, laughed and maybe he was in more trouble then he thought. There was no way he was only going to the surface today, he had to see him more, needed to know more about him. He just needed to figure out where exactly he lived.

“Hey boys! Keep an eye out! Looks like there is a storm coming!”

Kix breathed in sharply as he whipped around to see the dark clouds rolling in and he knew something bad was going to happen. Ships weren’t meant to outlast a storm that made the ocean turn against the sailors, Kix really has to wonder why the humans don’t just build them better but it wasn’t up to him. He at least gets the things inside them when they make it to the ocean floor.

He let himself dive into the water, swimming quickly to watch how bad this one could be and he wasn’t surprised to see the storm already making its presence known when he popped back up to the surface.

He knew he should swim under, letting the sailors meet their fate but he remained frozen. He has heard the tales about how wind will whip about, the sky thundering and bright flashes of light will appear across the sky and it was beautiful. What wasn’t beautiful was how the ocean responded to said storm as he ducked back underwater, swimming quickly to avoid a wave crashing into him.

He may be a water creature but he has heard stories of how much it hurts to be caught by one of those waves and he wasn’t going to test it out to see if it actually does. But he does need to make sure Jesse is okay and reluctantly the other humans since they were probably Jesse’s friends.

By the time he made his way back to the ship it was on fire and he stopped and just stared. How the kriff did the thing catch on fire he shall never know. Snapping out of his bewilderment, he twisted around eyes darting to catch any sign of Jesse as he swam, desperate to know if he was alive or not.

It wasn’t long until he caught sight of him for only a moment as he slipped underwater. “Kriff.” Kix muttered as he dived back underwater, swimming as hard as he could to get to Jesse.

Grunting, Kix slipped his arms around him, flipping his tail towards the surface as he moved the humans head to his shoulder once they were up above the water.

“You’re heavier than you look.” He grunted and it was a slow-going process as he panted, dragging himself along the shore while trying his best to not jostle Jesse to much as he collapsed beside him on the rough sand in exhaustion.

Laying there beside him staring up the blue sky, watching the birds fly he yearned to be apart of this world. He wanted to dance, he wanted to walk, run jump anything that a person with two legs can do. He turned to look at the man beside him, watching as his chest moved with every breath he took, his eyelashes flutter. He was beautiful.

He also broke several laws with saving him but he couldn’t find it in him to care. He wanted to be a part of this man’s world even if he didn’t know him. Slowly he brought his hand closer, using his fingers to trace the silly tattoo he had printed on his face.

“You are so beautiful” He whispered to himself as he let his finger trace along the bridge of his nose, lifting his finger to trace his lips. What he would do to get to know this man. He knew at that moment he was going to give his elders even more headaches if he was ever caught going back up to the surface to see him. And maybe, just maybe he would gather the courage to call out to him and talk to him.

He froze when he watched Jesse’s body shift, groaning as he moved his head and Kix scrambled to get back to the water. He didn’t hesitate once he slipped back into the water, swimming farther away in an attempt to not be seen. He breathed heavily once he thought he was a safe distance away, slowly moving back to the surface to take a peek to see if his human was gone.

His fear disappeared as he watched Jesse sit up, staring out to the water before calls rang out and several people appeared to take him away hopefully to a safe place.

By the time that he finally got back to where he was supposed to be despite being several hours late, the first person he tries to find is Rex. He couldn’t wait to tell him everything. And maybe he can figure out how exactly he can walk on land, maybe the sea witch will know of a spell to let him walk on land. He would do it, no matter the cost and no matter how how it could hurt, he would go through any pain to be able to live a life with Jesse.

#star wars #jessix #kix #jesse #implied Codex #captain rex #Mer au #parkkrys writes #tcw #codex #30 au requests sw

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winchester-fantasies · 5 years

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Lean On

Summary: Sam finds you years later after leaving you for Ruby. Set early in season 5. Inspired by the song “Lean On” by Major Lazer & DJ Snake.

Word Count: 2405

Warnings: angst, swearing, fluff

Pairing: Sam x Reader

Winchester Fantasies’ Masterlist

You sat on the side of your bed. Your shoulders slumped as you held the picture frame in your hands. A tear slipped down your cheek onto the glass. You wiped it away with your finger, a smear appearing across it, warping your face...and Sam’s. It was a picture from a long time ago. Before Dean came looking for his brother, before Jess died, before Sam’s powers, before Azazel, before the Devil’s Gate, before Dean’s deal.

You had known Sam since Stanford. In fact, Jess had been your best friend when she had first met him. You and Sam got along famously, and you three soon became inseparable. Some people would say you had been the third wheel. But you didn’t mind. You loved them both.

When Dean had shown up at Stanford, you had begged to tag along to help them find their dad. Sam had refused, saying you should stay with Jess, but you had been hardheaded and stupid. You had snuck into the Impala when they weren’t looking and only made your presence known when you were well away from Stanford. Sam had been livid for you directly going against his wishes.

It wasn’t until after Jess died that you understood why Sam had asked you to stay behind. Maybe if you had listened to him, you could have saved her. If you had stayed, maybe Jess wouldn’t have died. You had blamed yourself for years after that. You still did sometimes.

Although Sam was angry and distant for a long time after Jess’ death, you started to see him soften towards you. Especially after he heard you begging God for forgiveness and saw your continual nightmares. It hadn’t just been Sam who had seen Jess go up in flames that night. You had been right there when Dean had pulled Sam out, kicking and screaming as your best friend and his lover slowly perished. It wasn’t something that you had gotten over easily, and Sam had begun to realize that.

Instead of continuing to hold you at arm’s length, he finally started opening up to you. Your mutual grief and heartache drew you even closer. Things began to change. Feelings you hadn’t realized either of you had began to blossom. And everything simply evolved from there.

You realized just how hard the hunter life could be, and it caused you to have even more respect for the man you now called your own. But you were happy. Despite everything the Winchesters went through and the constant fear and stress of hunting, you and Sam were content. Living in your own little blissful bubble, just you two against the world. Nothing seemed impossible.

But that was before Dean had been dragged to Hell. That was before Ruby. You gritted your teeth as you thought of the demon. The bitch who took Sam away from you and left you with nothing but distant memories.

At first it was Sam coming home late at night. You figured it was his grief, driving him to drink and waste himself away. He never really let you help him. God knows you’d tried. But every time you’d attempt to get him to talk, his temper would flare, and he’d tell you to just shut up. You’d finally stopped trying.

Then it was Sam not coming home until the next morning. Your heart had seized up when you smelled another woman on his flannel. But you had ignored it, trying to convince yourself that it was just a phase. He was hurting, uncertain of what to do or how to process his brother’s death. He’d come back around, you’d told yourself.

One day Sam just didn’t come home. You had called his phone, frantically trying to get ahold of him, worried that something horrific had happened to him. On your sixth try, he finally answered. He’d told you to stop trying to reach him. He didn’t need you anymore. He was better and stronger with her. You were just holding him back. Your heart had ripped in two.

It’d been years since you’d spoken to him. You had packed up and left, never once looking back. You told yourself Sam was a dick. He hadn’t really loved Jess, and he sure as hell hadn’t loved you. You never wanted to see him again. Deep down you knew that was a lie. Every time your phone rang, your heart would skip a beat, hoping against hope it would be him. It never was. You’d see a tall man in the crowd, shaggy hair falling below his ears, and your breath would catch in your throat. But it wasn’t Sam.

You had finally given up ever seeing him again. You found yourself a job at the local grocery store. You had tried to stop hunting. But hunting was addictive, like a scratch you couldn’t quite reach. You began to understand why they had said hunting wasn’t something you retire from. In a weird and messed up way, it was your release. You could forget about Sam and your broken heart for a few days, even if it was while killing.

At last you could breathe again. You were finally starting to feel your heart heal. You were finally able to look at pictures of Sam without crying. “At least most of the time,” you thought, as you swiped at another tear. You had come to the conclusion that maybe it had been for the best anyway. Love and relationships didn’t mix well with hunting. It never lasted.

But fuck. Sometimes you just needed someone. Someone to come home to after a rough hunt. Someone to tell you you’d done good. Someone to promise it’d be all right. Someone besides the bar flies and one-night stands that always seemed to go hand in hand with hunting.

You were brought out of your reverie by a knock at your door. You wiped the rest of your tears away and grabbed your pistol from the bedside table. You weren’t working a case, and you didn’t have very many friends. There was no reason for someone to be there. You made your way quietly to the door and moved the curtains before you looked out the sidelite. You silently swore when you couldn’t make out the figure well enough. You huffed in irritation as you realized you’d have to swing the door open and hope to god it wasn’t someone or something out to get you.

Another knock sounded at the door, heavier this time. You gingerly unlocked the door and stared at it for a moment, willing your heartbeat to slow. You swung the door wide, your pistol at the ready.

There was shuffling feet and everything was happening so fast. Before you could register what was going on, you felt strong arms around you, your face plastered to a firm chest. You stiffened as you breathed in his scent. The scent you had so desperately tried to rid yourself of but one you still dreamed about at night.

“(Y/N),” he whispered in your ear, his warm breath ruffling the hair at your temple.

You finally felt your shock fade away, and you pulled away from him, your hands pushing against his chest so hard he was forced to take a few steps back.

“Get away from me,” you growled.

He looked the same, but in some ways he was different. Maybe it was because his hair was slightly longer or maybe because his eyes were tired, and his face was worn like he had been through hell. You hadn’t seen him in so long, and you questioned if it was even him.

“(Y/N),” he said again, taking a small step towards you. You backed away this time, your pistol once more raised.

“I said, get away from me!” you shouted.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa,” you heard a familiar voice say. You faltered as Dean walked through your door. You hadn’t seen him in almost two years, and your knees buckled. Sam caught you right before you hit the floor, but you didn’t have enough strength to fight him off.

“I’ve been known to make girls weak in the knees, but I have to say, this is a first,” Dean said with a playful smirk.

“H...how?” you whispered as Sam helped you to your kitchen table.

“Long story, sweetheart,” Dean said, sitting across from you while Sam took the seat next to yours. “Short version is Sammy’s no longer Ruby’s little bitch, and Lucifer’s out of his cage.”

You gaped, your shock only intensified. Sam glared at Dean. “You thought now would be the perfect time to tell her? She didn’t even know you got out of Hell, Dean! And she and I didn’t exactly part ways on the best of terms.”

It was your turn to scowl, your gaze spitting fire at Sam. “That’s all you have to say about how you treated me?” you spat.

Dean’s eyes widened at your venom-laced words. Sam paled, and he looked to the ground, words escaping him.

Dean cleared his throat uncomfortably. “I, uh, I think I’ll just go check on....” He left the sentence unfinished as he hurried out your door, slamming it behind him.

You sat staring at Sam, your ears ringing from the anger raging in your chest. He finally looked up at you, and you were surprised to see remorse and even a few tears threatening to spill over. “(Y/N),” he said, his voice cracking. He cleared his throat and tried again. “(Y/N), I’m so sorry.”

“Sorry doesn’t even begin to cover what you did and how you made me feel, Sam,” you said, you voice icy, words more vehement than you had intended. He flinched at your words but didn’t break his eye contact.

“I know it doesn’t. God, if I could take it all back...” he said quietly, running his fingers through his hair roughly. “Look, I don’t expect you to understand. And I’m not using this as an excuse to justify how I treated you. You sure as hell didn’t deserve that. But...it wasn’t just Ruby using me and getting inside my head. I.... Fuck, why is this so hard to get out? I...I was drinking demon blood.”

He looked at you, his eyes filled with trepidation. Your eyes widened at his confession, and you sat in silence for a moment, trying to process what he’d just told you. “You...you what?” you finally snapped incredulously. “Why would you do that?”

Sam’s eyes fell in shame. “Ruby said it was making me stronger. So I could go up against Lilith - the first demon Lucifer ever created,” he explained when you frowned in confusion at the name you’d never heard before. “But Ruby was only using me to help Lilith free Lucifer.”

“So basically...you started the apocalypse,” you stated.

“Yeah, basically,” Sam said sheepishly, rubbing a hand on the back of his neck.

You were both startled when a laugh resonated from your throat. Sam stared at you, flabbergasted at your reaction. You couldn’t stop, though. Even with you being a hunter, his story sounded absolutely batshit crazy.

Your laughter abruptly turned to sobs. Sobs that wracked your body as tears streaked down your face and drenched the top of your t-shirt. Sam looked even more shocked, but he suddenly pulled you into his arms. You curled into his body, feeling for all the world like a child again who wanted to feel safe. He held you tightly, his chin resting on your head, his large hands rubbing circles on your back.

Your tears finally stopped, but Sam didn’t let go. You didn’t want him to either.

“(Y/N), I’m so sorry. I know I’ve already said it, and I’ll continue to say it for the rest of my life,” he said, his voice sounding as if he was now the one on the verge of tears.

“I know,” you whispered back, you voice raspy.

“Ruby had my mind so twisted. She told me you were holding me back. That you would only distract me. Stifle my potential.... I stupidly believed it.”

You were silent. You weren’t sure what to say. You knew Sam was trying to be sincere. You could tell he was just as fucked up from all this as you were. But your heart was still smarting. And you couldn’t quite find it in yourself to forgive him.

“You don’t have to answer me now,” he whispered. “But I’d like to be yours again.... If you’ll have me.”

You felt butterflies in your stomach despite the bitterness in your heart. You smiled slightly, but you didn’t want Sam to see. Not yet.

“How do I know you won’t run off and do something like this again?”

“I’ll have you to keep me in line,” he said matter-of-factly.

You sighed heavily. “Sam, I tried that when you were with Ruby. You didn’t listen,” you said. You paused for a moment, contemplating your next words carefully. “I need someone I can count on, Sam. I need someone that even when they’re gone on hunts, I know they’re going to come home. I need to know they’re not going to abandon me again.”

Sam’s hold on you tightened, and he sucked in a deep breath. “I can’t promise I’ll be perfect. I can’t promise that I’ll never cause you to worry again. But I can promise that I’ll never let go. I’ll never leave you again. And I’ll always, always love you.”

You were silent as you weighed his words. “(Y/N),” he said. “You’ve never deserted me. You’ve always been there. Through everything with Jess, up until now. You’ve been my sanity, my rock, my everything.” He paused for a moment, and you thought he was done, but then he spoke again. “Please don’t leave me now,” he plead, a kind of desperation you’d never heard come from him before.

You leaned back and looked up into his hazel eyes. They were misty, and a single tear escaped, sliding down his cheek before you caught it with your finger. You smiled gently before you leaned forward and placed your lips softly against his. It was a cautious kiss, but you knew Sam understood as his arms held you impossibly tighter. You were still hurt. You both knew that wouldn’t be easily fixed, but this was a start. And right now you were in his arms. And this had always been your favorite place to be.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Thank you for reading!

***Please do not share my content on any other platform without my consent.

#sam winchester #sam winchester x reader #sam x reader #sam winchester fluff #supernatural fanfiction

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fernwehbookworm · 3 years

Text

Haunted- Chapter 2

As soon as Kara gets back to CatCo, she pitches her idea to her editor, Snapper Carr. He stares at her for a solid four minutes before grunting out a response. “Fine. But you better do this right. Just the facts. We don't need a eulogy. We need an article that will blow the other four out of the water. Get going, Pony Tail."

Kara escaped his office as fast as she could before Snapper could change his mind.

It was already the end of the day. Kara had spent so much time at L-Corp she had worked through her lunch, very rare for her. With her stomach growling, Kara packed up a few things she thought she might need on her desk and decided to head home. While Kara walked the five city blocks back to her apartment, she ordered more takeout then she would probably eat but everything sounded so good right now. It was better leftover anyway. She is barely through her door when the delivery guy knocks. The smell of Chinese food permeates the entire apartment and Kara can barely focus enough to pay and set up her laptop before diving in.

When the first few bites settle into her stomach and take the edge off her hunger, Kara can actually pause to log into her computer and start researching. In between bites, Kara scrolls through article after article on Lena Luthor. Really, there is nothing about her up until her brother's arrest. There is one short piece back when she was four and being adopted by the Luthor's, her tiny hand is obscured by her father's as the now family of four leaves the courthouse after signing the papers. The occasional mention on various projects for school fairs but Miss Luthor is always listed as 'not pictured.' The next picture Kara finds is of Lena graduating high school as Valedictorian at the age of fifteen. She had refused to give a speech, stating 'who am I to speak about our high school experience when I was barely here even two years? They laughed and cried together. They have grown together in ways I will never understand. Let one of them tell them of a hope for the future as they look fondly on the past."

Which Kara thought was a pretty good speech in itself.

Then Miss Luthor was gone again, only resurfacing in research papers and a start-up application with a man named Jack Sphere, who Kara finds is the now CEO of Spherical Industries. Shortly after that is when Lex Luthor is arrested. After scouring those police reports, Kara finally finds how. Lena Luthor turned her own brother in. Her public statement says that she suspected something had been off with her brother. At first she assumed it was the pressure of taking over LuthorCorp, which he quickly renamed to LexCorp, after their father had died. But it continues even as the company went into a period of growth and prosperity. Investors were practically knocking down Mr. Luthor's door.

Miss Luthor noticed a heavier rotation of women through her brother's life. There had always been a new woman every couple of months because Mr. Luthor had been known to get bored easily. He was a very intellectual man, he even claimed his sister was his only match for wits. Then it seemed like a new woman every week. Miss Luthor worried about a scorned woman trying to blackmail her brother and said so to him. 'He just chuckled real lowly. And said there was nothing to worry about. It was all taken care of.' A quote from the police report.

She didn't know then, that he was wooing these women, giving them everything they could ever want, paying off their debts and dressing them in the finest clothes, and just when they would say they couldn't be happier, he would kill them. He would drug them and tag them like farm animals or game. Then hunt them like those very animals in the huge forests on the Luthor estate. Miles of undeveloped trees that were privately owned. Police still don't believe they have found all the bodies of the missing women who are presumed dead by Lex Luthor's hand. He buried them where he killed them. Still in torn designer dresses with diamonds around their necks and bright orange tags punctured through an ear.

Miss Luthor had started to see signs of the deeds slowly. Blood on a dress shirt carelessly left in a bathroom. A hunting cabinet left unlocked. Dirt tracked into Mr. Luthor's bedroom because the maids had been dismissed for the week. That's when she started spying on him. As a child, she had hid from an verbally abusive mother and knew all nooks and crannies of the Luthor estate. When she finally caught him drugging the next victim, she knew. She took what evidence she could to the police and cooperated fully. Lex Luthor escaped before being taken into custody and no one knows where to. As Miss Luthor gave the federal agency access to LexCorp’s financials, a whole other slew of accusations were leveled on the former CEO. He had been selling weapons on both sides of wars around the world, profiting from death and destruction. His list of crimes went on and on.

Kara begins to write, switching between tabs on the internet browser. It takes hours just to get her notes into a semblance of order and a skeleton of a rough draft. Kara even uses her found pen to take physical notes and jot down ideas as well. Kara works until her eyes start to burn and half her food is gone. By eight, Kara was also halfway through a bottle of wine. She pushes past that, diving in and losing herself in the research and the stories of Miss Luthor’s employees.

Kara blinks hard to try and rid the sleep from her eyes, she is too in the zone to stop now. When she opens them again, she startles at the woman sitting next to her at the table. Kara instantly recognizes her with the long dark hair and piercing green eyes. She’s even still wearing the lab coat that she was in the video.

“Okay, I’m dreaming. I have to be.” Kara mumbles to herself and rubs her eyes.

“Oh, yeah. You are definitely face down on your laptop. It’s quite adorable. Too bad all those ‘F’s’ are going to take up your pages. I hope you auto saved.” Kara watches the phantom of Miss Luthor laugh and then she ties up her hair in a high ponytail, exposing the sharp jawline that Kara saw in her company portrait.

“Yeah definitely dreaming. I think I’ve been thinking about you too much.”

“Honey, no one ever thinks of me too much.” Miss Luthor raises an eyebrow and flashes a smirk Kara’s way.

Kara blushes. “Well since this is all not real, care for an interview? Maybe my subconscious can tell me something.”

“I don’t know. I’m pretty sure I’m here. I mean, I feel real. But I have never met you before. But I’ve been watching you for a while and all of a sudden you can see me.”

“Sounds very dreamish to me. So, Interview?”

“I don’t think that’s how dreams work.” Miss Luthor says with a laugh.

“I don’t think I could dream up that laugh, Miss Luthor.”

Miss Luthor winces, “If this isn’t real, then please call me Lena. Miss Luthor makes me feel like I am in a Boardroom.”

“All right, Lena then. I’m Kara.”

“Really? I thought it was Pony Tail. At least that's what that angry goblin man called you.”

“You saw that?”

“I’ve been with you almost all day. I've seen everything.”

“Everything?” Kara’s voice gets a bit higher.

“Don’t worry, I stayed out of the bathroom stall.”

“Oh good, my subconscious lets me have my privacy.”

“Still don’t think that’s true, but tell me, Kara, why are you doing this? Why are you trying to make me look so good? You don’t even know me?”

“I’m not trying to make you look good. You were good. The things you were doing for your employees and National City is amazing. Not to mention your charity helping third world countries. Like, What weren’t you doing?” “I wasn’t living. I was working myself until I couldn’t think to fill the void of loneliness that I thrust upon myself by turning in my brother and cutting my mother out of my life.”

“Wow, intense. But you didn’t find joy in anything you did.”

“I did. But it was always just so temporary. And I had no one to share it with. I never understood why people would talk about sharing their lives with significant others but when the machine malfunctioned and I saw the bright light. It all hit me at the same time and then I was there, watching you interview with Jess.”

“Man, I really wish you weren’t dead. I would have loved to meet you.”

“But I don’t think I am.”

Kara jerks awake, scattering her papers and pens to the floor. She casts about for Lena before realizing she was in fact just dreaming. A glance at her computer screen does reveal a stream of F’s going on for way too many pages. The sun has long set and Kara looks at her watch to see that it is now three in the morning. She groans, she has less than four hours to sleep before getting up again.

Kara is dead on her feet the next morning, she bought two caramel ice cappuccinos for herself and drank them both before they had a chance to melt. Kara has to do a double take when she sits at one of the cafe tables. She swears Lena is sitting across from her, but when Kara blinks, she’s gone. Kara shakes her head and chalks it up to the lack of sleep. On the street, as Kara works on her vanilla cream-filled doughnut, she almost drops it because someone runs into her, she has an apology half way out of her mouth before realizing that the person is long gone.

Eyebrows drawn together, Kara finishes her trek to work and hides in her cubicle. Luckily, Snapper seems content to allow her to work on the Lena Luthor story and leaves Kara alone for the morning. It’s nearing noon when Kara’s phone buzzes.

Noonan’s?

Alex knows her sister very well. Noonan’s sounds perfect.

20 min? Kara responds.

A thumbs-up emoji comes in response and Kara begins saving her place so she can head out to meet her sister. Kara logs out and stands to swing her bag onto her shoulder, somehow knocking her pen container to the ground in the process. Kara groans to herself and stoops to pick them up. Someone giggles at her misfortune but Kara can’t pinpoint which one of her coworkers it was.

Kara shakes her head and lets it go.

“Hey Alex,” Kara greets as she sinks into the seat across from her sister at Noonan’s.

“Hey Kar… you look exhausted.”

“Gee, thanks. Good to see you too.”

“I’m your sister, I’m supposed to call it how it is. What’s up?”

Before Kara can respond, their waitress interrupts. “The usual, dears?”

“Yes, thanks, Carol.” Kara says.

“So?” Alex asks, raising an eyebrow.

“It’s nothing, really.” Kara tries to wave off her sister’s concerns but Alex continues to stare her down. “It’s just this L-Corp article. I stayed up way too late researching and fell asleep at my computer.”

“You have got to stop doing that to yourself.”

“I know, I know. I even had this super weird dream about Lena Luthor.”

“Weird how?”

“She was just there in my apartment, sitting at my table, and we just started talking. But then she kept saying how she didn’t think she was actually dead. It just felt so real. I don’t know. It was weird.”

“Sounds like you have been really focused on this. You were probably just overtired.”

“Maybe, but forget about me. What’s new with you?”

“Not much. I’m thinking about asking Kelly to move in.” Alex winces at Kara’s high pitched squeal.

“Not much?! That’s huge Alex! Really? I’m so happy for you!”

Alex laughs at Kara’s enthusiasm. “It’s not that big of a deal. She hardly ever goes back to her apartment anyway, mine is closer to both of our jobs and she already has half my closet space.”

“But still! That’s great. I love Kelly, well not how you love Kelly, but like I love Kelly as a very possible future sister-in-law.”

“Whoa, slow down sis. Let’s take this one step at a time.”

“Sorry, I just excited for you. It will be great. We should have a dinner party after you ask to celebrate.”

“Here you ladies go,” Carol set’s down the plates of food, Kara’s piled high with extra fries and a couple of extra pickles next to her burger.

“Thanks,” Alex accepts her club sandwich with a hungry grin. "Want my pickle?"

"Always," Kara grins as she grabs the spear from her sister's plate.

As Kara settles back into her chair, she does a double-take. She could have sworn she had seen Lena Luthor watching her from the door. But when she looked again there was just a woman with dark hair waiting for a seat.

"What's wrong?" Alex asks, noticing her sister's confusion.

"Nothing. Just, jeez, I must be really thinking too much about this article. I keep thinking I see Le- Miss Luthor out of the corner of my eye. It's happened a couple times today."

"Well, maybe when you finish this article, you should put in for some personal time. You haven't taken a day off since you became a reporter two years ago. And you have been pushing really hard this past couple of weeks. We even canceled the last two game nights, which, by the way, Kelly wants to have on Friday."

"Oh! Yes! I met a new friend interviewing for this article. Winn, he asked if we could hang out sometime so I told him he should definitely come to game night."

Alex raises an eyebrow at her sister.

"What?" Kara asks through a mouthful of fries.

"Kar…"

Kara swallows. "What?" She asks innocently.

"I think that poor man was trying to ask you out."

"Wha-? No. Wait." Kara rethinks their last interaction. She frowns hard and then shrugs. "He isn't really my type, plus I'm a little put off of men still. Don't get me wrong, I am still attracted to them but after Mike, I think I need a break from them."

"Hey, you won't find any arguments from me. Women are prettier anyway." Alex laughs.

"All right you big lesbian, yes they are. But I'm not really feeling the dating thing anyway. I just need some 'me' time."

"I don't need to know about your 'me' time. Some things are just best for sisters not to know.”

"Ugh, Alex! Not like that. Well… a little like that, but not the point. Okay changing the subject. How are you asking Kelly to move in?"

<><><><>

Kara was really starting to hate this feeling of being watched. It had nagged at her all day. Like someone was just behind her, watching everything she did. It followed her all the way home and into her apartment. Kara was trying to just chalk it up to lack of sleep and overthinking but then she just thought about it more and it became a vicious cycle. The back of her neck prickled as she locked her front door and Kara only hesitated a moment before chaining the door along with the deadbolt. Kara knew she should sleep, but this article needed to be done and prepared for whatever new information L-Corp sent out when they concluded their investigation. To Kara though, that information would be last. She really wanted to focus on Lena's life instead of her death. Kara ordered pizza and began to dive deep into her research again. Each new charity or fundraiser event leading to a new one. There were some that Kara could not find clear evidence of it being Lena so she emailed Jess who responded promptly with a list of events and organizations that Lena decided not to be listed on or listed as a minor contributor even though the exact opposite was true.

Around 9, Kara can feel her eyelids growing heavy as she shakes off sleep and takes another bite of her half-finished pizza. Or she tries to. Darkness envelops her consciousness and panic feels like it wraps around her heart.

“Where am I? Come on… come on. I have to find a way back. There… There! I have to—”

Kara jerks awake, knocking her pizza box onto the ground and nearly punching her computer screen. Though the confused, muddled images fade, the fear keeps her heart pumping. Kara isn't really sure what she was just dreaming of but it raised goosebumps on her arms.

Kara stands and shuts her computer. Even as she is telling herself how ridiculous it was, Kara checks all the locks on her windows and balcony doors. She even rechecks her front door. Satisfied, Kara goes to brush her teeth and climbs into bed. She still can’t shake the dream. Kara lays awake, listening to every noise of the city and her neighbors.

Kara must have drifted off at some point because soon she is woken again by a rattling noise. It’s slow, coming back to consciousness, but when she does, her knuckles tighten on her comforter as she remains as still as possible and held her breath to pinpoint the cause of the noise.

The rattling continues and seems to be growing more agitated. Quietly, Kara gets off her bed and grabs her baseball bat from her closet. Alex had insisted on her having something to protect herself when she moved out on her own. She had laughed at the time but she wasn't laughing now. Kara tiptoes back out into the living room, bat half raised as her eyes straining in the darkness. Luckily, the moon is full and illuminated the living space enough for Kara to look for anything out of place. The rattling noise came again and Kara's head snaps in that direction, lifting the bat higher.

With a laugh, Kara releases the breath she is holding. Streaky is perched on the fire escape swatting at the window to be let in. The stray cat had selected Kara's apartment to escape to when he sensed storms coming or drops in temperature.

Kara sets the bat against the couch and unlocks the window to let the demanding feline in.

"Hey bud, trying to scare me to death?"

Streaky just lets out a meow of protest at how long it took for Kara to allow him entry.

"Yeah, yeah," Kara says to him. "Come on, I'll put some food and water down. Then, you have to let me sleep. I only have three more hours."

Kara digs in the bottom of her pantry for Streaky's bowl and food. She fills one half with the dry food and the other with water. She has to concentrate not to trip over the cat circling her ankles. Kara sets it down with a scratch behind pointed ears and earns a contented purr.

By the time Kara is crawling into bed to try and sleep, Streaky is making himself comfortable at the foot of it.

Kara's alarm blares all too soon and she is starting to seriously consider time off like her sister suggested. Kara rubs the sleep from her eyes and looks at Streaky. He is sitting up with his back to Kara. He is too stiff for his normal behavior. As Kara watches him, Streaky's head slowly pivots to the right, then back to the left, as if tracking the movement of something. But he isn't looking at the ground. Streaky is looking straight ahead, if even a little up.

"Hey…". Kora mumbles, trying to break the creepy behavior, she taps him with a foot. Streaky doesn't even budge from his watchful stance.

"Okay, weirdo."

With the sun rising, most of the anxiety from the night before had faded, but the cats strange behavior still set prickled at Kara's neck.

She decided a shower would help clear the night from her mind and the sleep from her eyes. The hot water soon had the bathroom steaming and Kara lets her tense shoulders relax under the water pressure. She knows she can’t stay in all morning but boy, is she tempted to. Streaky is protesting at the closed bathroom door, hating being shut out of a room. With a groan, Kara turns off the water and grabs the towel from the bar next to the tub. A quick pat down before stepping out to wrap her hair up.

Kara turns to wipe the moisture from her mirror and freezes with her heart.

Help Me!

#supergirl #supercorp #scbb2020 #Scbb #fanfiction #autism #Haunted

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solli · 4 years

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2020 saw both the seblaine and twilight renaissance. coincidence? i think not.

(obviously, we’re mentioning blood).

read this and more “hints” on ao3!

"I know what he is!" Sam shouts slamming Blaine's locker close.

Blaine sighs. Not this again.

"He runs super fast and he hardly sweats! And he's so pale, dude. The other day I touched him in chem-"

"You did what?"

"-and he was freezing cold!"

"There's AC in the lab and you had a fever."

"Dude, come on! His eyes? Are they green? Brown? Blue?"

"I think they're hazel. They look really green because he's always wearing coral and slate grey."

"Exactly! He wants to trick you into thinking it's some optical shit. Camouflage, dude! And how come he's never in the sun?"

"It's Forks, Sam. None of us is ever in the sun."

"Not Monday last week! Not a cloud, and he was nowhere to be seen!"

"He could be sensitive to sunlight. Lots of people who move out here are."

"That's what I'm saying! It's the perfect cover up!"

"Cover up for what, Sam?"

Sam stops in the middle of the hallway and Blaine stops some steps further away.

"He's a vampire, dude."

Blaine bites back his grin.

"No, Sam, he's not."

Sebastian's blood smells like fresh loundry used to do. Fresh, comforting and weirdly intimate. He kisses his wrist. He inhales. A rush of adrenaline makes him dizzy, the closest thing to loss of conciousness he experienced in hundred of years.

"He thinks I'm the vampire." Sebastian repeates, placing his foot on the egde of Blaine's chair, just between his legs.

"Mh-mh." He kisses up his wrist again. He shouldn't, really. The urge of grazing his theet against Sebastian's thin, warm skin is torture.

"I risk an eczema anytime I'm out in the sun, what is your excuse?"

"Camping trips."

Sebastian scoffs, but he’s clearly entertained.

"And he belives those?"

"We don’t only go when the sun is out. He’s been with us too many times to find it suspicious I guess."

"I’m trying to picture St. James camping but I’m afraid not even I have enough imagination for that."

Sebastian’s foot presses against the inside of Blaine’s thight and he turns his face in Sebastian’s wrist, lips parting.

"Sebastian." he reprimends him, but he smirks and lean closer.

Suddenly his neck is right there, smooth pale skin flushing with heat and the thrumming of his heart and, God, his scent. He keeps his eyes well open. He can’t risk forgetting it’s Sebastian he could hurt, not even for a moment.

"Blaine. It’s not right for you to be having all the fun."

"I told you, you can have fun with anyone you want." He says, because it’s reasonable.

The green of Sebastian’s eyes is nothing more than a thin ring.

"Well, yeah. But how am I supposed to convince you turning me it’s the best deal for both of us if you can’t see how desperate I am?"

He pushes his foot a bit higher. Blaine stops breathing halfway through one. Sebastian doesn’t miss it, and suddenly he’s even closer.

"I’m not doing that."

"What if I jump off a cliff? Then you’ll be forced to if you don’t want me to die."

"You wouldn’t."

Sebastian doesn’t say anything more, lips turned in a smirk. Instead he tilts his head, ever so slowly, and Blaine takes a short, tentative breath. His eyelashes flutter.

"Just give me a little bit more time." Blaine mouths against his pulse, and Sebastian skims Blaine’s skin just under his ear. A feather light touch that just a few few weeks before had him bolt out of the room and into the woods.

"I want to, but you know, I don’t have a lot of that. Especially if you’re planning to defile me while I’m in my prime, human beauty fades really quickly."

Blaine would tell him to stop being a smartass, but he knows it’d be useless. Instead, he parts his lips some more and resists the urgency to breath when his theet graze Sebastian’s skin.

Just like that, Sebastian’s silent and his heartbeat louder. Blaine doesn’t know if it’s fear, or arousal, or both. He can’t smell it on him, but he can’t breathe in, not now, doesn’t matter how much he needs to smell it. He opens his mouth wider, and in the slowest way he can he presses his tongue flat against Sebastian’s skin.

The taste overwhelms him. The heat burns him up. His solar plexus tightens even if there’s no air to gulp down, and in the most painful moment he can recall with a clear head he swipes his tongue higher, stops until Sebastian’s heart his beating in his mouth, the faint sound of blood rushing through his vein. He never breaks eye contact, needing to Sebastian’s eyes, the slope of his cheekbones. To rembember he’s the guy he fell in love with the first time he met his eyes.

Then Sebastian leans foward by an hair, eyes dark and cheeks flushed, and Blaine jumps away from the table, gripping the counter behind him strong enough that he creaks it, wood breaking in his hand.

"Maybe I should go." Sebastian says breathing way heavier than usual. Blaine feels it like Sebastian was panting in his ear, his heart thumping in Blaine’s chest hard enough that it could almost be Blaine’s own.

"Maybe you should." Blaine’s growl suprising his own ears.

Sebastian is on his feet in what feels like a lifetime but it’s merely seconds. Blaine almost laughs. It’s moments like this that reminds him how much Sebastian wants to live, contrary to what he keep saying.

"You know," Sebastian drawls with a smirk when he’s barely past the doorway of the living room, a distance that seems safe to him and that Blaine can barely feel. "Maybe I’m not the one who should have some fun. Maybe Rachel and Jesse won’t mind if you join their fake almlost incestual affair."

Blaine laughs, eyes glued to Sebastian’s easy smirk, refusing to take in the slight tremble in his fingers.

"Go." Blaine says, and it sounds a lot like a stay.

"Okay." he smiles, and Blaine starts counting.

He doesn’t move, doesn’t blink, until he’s counted up to 1200 and he’s sure Sebastian is at least halfway down the road to his house.

He breaths in. He can still smell Sebastian on his tongue.

#seblaine #seblaine fic #listen #look #it was bound to happen

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howdoyoudothedew · 4 years

Text

Another long SPN post

This time it’s notes from my WIPs. I never actually really wrote any of these, but tags and titles are included. Anyone can use these as starting points for a fanfic, have fun

Henry/Balthazar Summary: When Henry’s mentor, Benny, doesn’t return from the war Henry is saddened. He refuses to believe Benny died. Won’t even entertain it. On the way to find his missing mentor/father figure, he meets Balthazar. A strange man with a british accent and a habit of flirting with everyone, especially him. He finds Benny. He finds love. THen Balthazar tells him he’s from another time period and has to go. The last chapter is Balthazar saving Henry from Abaddon. Side note: Henry has blue eyes that Balthy apparently likes to wax poetic about Chapter One The day’s circled on his calendar. ‘Benny comes home’. That would be today. Or, it would’ve been. He had gotten the letter a week ago. ‘Benjamin Lafitte died in the war. We send our condolences.’ The letter, of course, wasn’t actually as cold and unfeeling as that. But it didn’t matter. Because it felt like that. It felt like someone had taken him and shoved him in an ice bath. He couldn’t believe the letter. He wouldn’t believe the letter. Benny had promised he’d live through this war. And if he had to find him, then by golly he’d find him. Even if he had to do it on his own. Henry snuck out of the bunker that night. A pack of food was the only thing he brought with him. That, and a picture of him and Benny. No one caught him on the way out. He knew the passages too well. He stole a bike from the garage, and left. There would be no note left in his absence. No trace of where he’d gone. Because if he’d left one, he worried that they’d try to find him. Find him and drag him back. But he couldn’t go back. Not now. Not without Benny. New section He’d been on the hunt for four days now. Had traveled from Lebanon, Kansas to Chattanooga, Tennessee and was slowly making his way to the Georgia coastline. His plan was to check coastal cities first. Then he’d work inwards till he covered all of the US. He only hoped Benny would return here and not go to another country. This is where he runs into Balthazar It’s when he’s asking a bartender if he’d ever seen Benny, while showing his picture Balthy comes up to him and says “Are you from around here, because you’re a perfect ten.”

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Don't Make Bets With Love Goddesses Five chapters Alternative meeting, canon divergent, Gabriel is Loki, Aphro has her son arrow multiple people, but Gabe bypasses them all “You cheated!” “That never seemed to matter to you before, now how did I cheat?” “Eros shot Sam with an arrow!” “My son’s arrow never touched the Winchester.” Everyone has what the humans would call a ‘soulmate’, not everyone finds them and they're not always romantic. It looks like Gabe found his, though.

Chapter One Explains how Loki has messed around, yet has never fallen in love “I will never fall in love” the Norse god boasted. He was talking out of his ass, and Aphrodite knew it. Loki bets Aphrodite that he will never fall in love She accepts with a wicked twinkle in her eye Aphro has never been able to pass up bets, especially when they deal with love He was close once, with Kali, but it ultimately fell flat It didn’t even actually fall flat with Gabe, but with Kali who could sense his growing attachment and cut off their involvement before it could happen. They had made a promise to each other that their thing would remain ‘no strings attached’. Then years where nothing happens

Chapter Two Sam enters the scene He’s tall and handsome; funny, sarcastic, witty. And he’s one of the only people Gabe has ever met that won’t take his crap. That will see right through it. Gabriel vows right then and there that he won’t fall in love with Sam.

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Different Circumstances Summary: Where the first meeting isn't of a boy with demon blood and an archangel, hidden as a trickster god, disguised as a janitor. Nor is the second meeting, or the third, or even the fifth. Until suddenly it is and the world seems just that much more messed up. Six chapters Tags: Canon divergent, Canon universe, 5 + 1 format, fluff, angst

Chapter One High school Gabe is the ‘bad kid’ They bond over pranks, and Gabe teaches Sam a few tricks

Chapter Six Sam connects all the dots and realizes the few people he had met in his life, the ones other than Jess that he had clicked with on automatic, were all the same person. Where all the trickster, Loki the god of mischief, and Gabriel the messenger of God. He hadn’t even clicked with Jess as quickly as he had seemed to click with each and every version of Gabe he had met. And now he was gone.

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To Heal A Soul Summary: Castiel isn't the only angel who tried to save Sam Winchester from the Cage. But while Castiel got a body, the other found only a soul. Tiny and broken, frayed at the edges, yet still somehow alive curled up in the corner of the Cage. Gabe keeps and heals Sam’s soul until he feels that it could be replaced with minimum consequences, when he does replace it there is still a battle. Gabe can’t help him with this battle, none of Team Free Will can. Gabe's dog is Max Chapter One Gabe gets Sam’s soul, just his soul, from the Cage because he knows what’ll happen if he puts his soul back in his body after Lucifer had ripped it out Sam gets a different… form type thing. Like, I don’t know Gabe uses pagan magic to give Sam a body like his own Explains to Sam the situation

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Stacy’s Dad (Lafittz) Tags: help me for i know not what im doing, i love this song and had to do this though, babysitter!garth, single father!benny, female teen oc, benny is older than garth by a few years, dilf!Benny, Notes: I'm sorry for the dilf tag, but I thought of it and it was too funny to me to not include it. Garth’s turned twenty a day ago, and is babysitting Benny’s kid (she’s twelve, so it’s not exactly babysitting) Benny’s thirty (his wife and him had Stacy when they were eighteen, they married right out of high school) Garth asks Benny out, saying that he promised him when he was eleven he’d go out with him when he turned twenty Stacy and Garth go to the pool, where Benny may work as a lifeguard Or, Stacy met Garth during her freshman year and they hit it off immediately as friends But Stacy liked Garth, and when he met Stacy’s dad it was practically love at first sight. (Because he's mushy like that) Or Benny and Andrea had her at sixteen, and Benny was estatic. Sure, it was early and he wasn't sure if he was ready, but he'd be damned if he didn't try to be a good father.

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Scarecrow Summary: Remake where Cas is a “hunter” who Dean picks up on the way to ----, he's working the same case and they decide to pretend to be a couple to solve it. Also, instead of Meg, Sam runs into Gabriel because he picks him up on the road before he got to Meg. Sam’s part is inspired in part by the honeythief amv. Tags: s01e11 Scarecrow, rewrite, i tried, canon divergent, canon hopping, beginning unchanged, fake/pretend relationship, bonding(????) Dean picks up Cas either along the road (a parallel of their brothers) or at the food place he and Sammy split A man slid into the seat Sam had vacated, black hair Dean could only describe as bedroom hair, piercing blue eyes, and a trenchcoat. “So you're going after the missing couples, too?” The other couple isn't there, instead the people there immediately assume they're a couple Cas immediately goes with it and when Dean asks about it later he simply shrugs and explains that this job seemed to require some falsehood

---- Short ficlet where they find Narnia. “I thought you'd already been to Narnia given how deep inside the closet you are,” Gabriel joked.

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Sabriel Anniversary Sam: Gabriel, I figured we could go where I first fell in love with you. Gabriel: Sam, I'd rather not… Sam: Why not? Gabriel: I have bad memories there. Sam, in surprise: Bad memories? I mean , sure we tried to kill you Gabriel: Lucifer killed me. Sam: Oh… Oh! You were thinking Elysian Fields? I meant Crawford Hall! Gabriel: What? Sam nervously rubs the back of his neck while looking away: Yeah… Could never really get you out of my head after that. *looks back at him* Even when I really wanted to. ----

Everytime they find Gabriel again, Sam wants to ask Gabriel to help. He wants him to stay. Though he tells himself it's not for him, but the world. But then they leave him behind in that ring of holy fire. And he… dies. At the hands of Lucifer. Sam thinks that's it. But then he shows up again, only to save him and leave him. (But it wasn't just him- it was Castiel as well, he has to remind himself for the next few weeks till it sticks.) So this time Sam swallows everything down, and he tells himself it's okay. Gabriel would've never stayed. And that's fine. Then Gabriel's back again, and he finally agrees to be on their team. He finally agrees to simply stay, even if it isn't for him. So of course he has to die all over again. ----

A rebound. Gabriel knows that's exactly what this is. After knowing Sam for all these years, he can read him. Read him easier than he can read himself. Heck, he knew Jess and Sam’d date the second he saw them together. And just as he knew, a month later they were dating. So yeah, Gabriel knew how to read Sam and how he felt about others. Romantic feelings just weren't there for him. Sure, Sam sounded sincere. He truly believed he liked Gabriel, and Gabriel knew that. But he knew his best friend and he knew the feelings were just his body’s half-assed attempt at fixing whatever hole Jess had left him with that he refused to recognize.

“I'm not ready.” It's not a lie. Gabriel isn't ready to date anyone, even if he loves Sam with all his heart. But he refused to be a rebound. He told the girlfriend Sam has before Jess- Ruby- as much when she gave him her twisted blessing after Sam broke up with her. If Sam knew that's what he was looking for in Gabriel, it would crush him. The poor kid would feel terrible, and Gabriel knows it. That is something he won't allow. Sam deserved happiness, but it couldn't be with him. Not now. Maybe not ever.

---- Crime Cleaners crime scene cleaners sam and dean who get roped into something well above their paygrade by two particular Novaks, possible villain being Luci and Lilith, who is his 'queen' they definitely get help from their friend Bobby and the Novak's friends Charlie, Rowena, and Rowena's girlfriend, the coroner Billie Or, serial killers God and his Righteous Man, who are secretly Dean and Cas. Gabe and Sam are the ones trying to find them.

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John Winchester and Chuck Shurley meet the parents thing. John first meets Cas, and Dean explains that Cas is his husband. Then he meets Gabriel, Sam’s bondmate-husband- and an archangel. When he mentions how weird this is, Gabriel is the one who points out that “If you think it's weird that your son in laws are angels, just remember that their father in law is literally God.”

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Normal au, Gabriel shows up out of nowhere because he has to do a blood sugar test to check for diabetes or some shit and he just grabs Sam: “I need your blood.”

#supernatural #sabriel #destiel #laffitz #henthazar #spn prompts #spn fic ideas

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skyking91-archive · 3 years

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the fallout || skam

Discord thread featuring: Sky & @samuelburton

When: October 24, 2020 - after the halloween party

Where: sam’s apartment

mentions: @ellicfm

Description: sky and sam fight, then they agree to take a break

Trigger Warnings: brief mentions of past trauma, arguing, feeeeels

Sky

Admittedly, sky was a little drunk. She had to be when she was around mat. Like. Damn. She was thankful thought that the Uber dropped her and Mat off at different places. The last thing she wanted to do was spend any more time with him. And he seemed a bit off after the party was over anyway. She hopped out of the car when it arrived at her boyfriend’s place and she went right up, opening the door with the key he’d given her not that long ago. “Hi baby.” She spoke like she had had the longest day at work. She had been thinking about the conversation she’d had with Sam all damn night and had a really hard time enjoying herself. The corn maze with Jess was definitely the highlight of her night though. Still, she couldn’t get same off of her mind.

Sam

sam had stayed at the party longer than he’d intended and while he’d thought ditching would be a good idea, sitting alone with his thoughts while he waited for his girlfriend arrive hadn’t worked out all that well either. especially after that conversation he’d had with ellie about what sam deserved in a relationship. it was a relief to be pulled from his thoughts when he heard a key turn in the door. “hey love,” he smiled tiredly at her. he was genuinely excited to see her but he was also exhausted and the unopened bottle of whiskey beside him hadn’t helped matters. he’d managed to stay relatively sober the entirety of the party but as soon as he was home and didn’t have to worry about out his girlfriend and her fake boyfriend’s pretend relationship, he’d felt free to indulge.

Sky

Sky found Sam sitting on the couch. He seemed relatively comfortable; like he had been there for a while. He looked sad, but just his presence alone made Sky smile. She sat her bag down and took her shoes off before she walked over to find Sam next to a bottle of whiskey. This...didn’t look good. The actress straddled her partner before sitting down on his lap, rubbing his tense shoulders out. Something was off. And it was more than just the conversation that they had had in the kitchen. “I’m really sorry about earlier. I know this sucks...” her dark eyes dropped as she spoke. “I’m sorry we couldn’t go together.” She said with a sigh.

Sam

sam’s hands landed on sky’s thighs as she sat in his lap. he closed his eyes and leaned his head back against the couch, relaxing as her hands went to work on his shoulders. it was a comfort to have her home in his arms again, especially after things had been so tense earlier that evening. still, he couldn’t shake ellie’s words from earlier. “s’okay,” he shrugged lightly, eyes still closed. “it’s all part of the agreement, right?”

Sky

Sky wasn’t totally sure how to respond to that. Was he being sarcastic or...? Sky furrowed her brow in response and dropped her hands from his shoulders. “Im sorry...” she apologized again, looking away from him. Her heart sank. “Sam...I don’t know what you want me to do. I don’t want you to be miserable jn this. I know you wanna take me out with you, and like...post pictures and stuff. Just...tell people about us.” She didn’t even know where she was going with that but it was something that had been in her mind for a while. She’d try to make up for it with presents, but that only went so far.

Sam

sam opened his eyes, his heart sinking a little when he saw the sad look on her face. he didn’t like making her feel that way. but this was a conversation that needed to be had or else they’d keep circling back round to this same shitty feeling. with ellie’s words fresh in his mind he looked at her questioningly. “can i ask... why are you doing this? because i thought i knew but i don’t really think that i do anymore.”

Sky

Sky was just now realizing how drunk she was when she felt like she was going to start crying. Fuck. She tried to hold it in, but she knew she wouldn’t be able to for very long if this conversation was headed where she thought it was. She rolled over his lap and leaned her head against the back of the couch and huffed, racking her brain for an answer to his question. Why was it so hard for her to come up with an answer that didn’t make her sound like a self centered bitch. “It’s my job.” She finally said after a few moments of silence. “I...it’ll really help me with my career. This’ll open a lot of doors for me.” What a self centered bitch. Still. It was true.

Sam

sam nodded slowly, listening as she spoke. he hadn’t been far off. “i guess i just feel like... i mean you’re so talented, love,” he told her, turning his body to face her on the couch. “i mean really, you’re brilliant. and i don’t understand why you feel that you need to do this to further your career.” sure it would get her a lot more exposure a whole lot quicker. but was it not more rewarding to come by it organically? sam truly thought she was talented enough to make it on her own.

Sky

“You don’t get it.” She said immediately, without really thinking about it. “It’s not just talent that gets you famous and successful. You have to have the right connections, the right exposure.” She stood up and huffed, pressing her hand to her forehead in frustration. She paced slowly because now she was getting frustrated. “Thank you, but there are a lot of talented people in the world and only a select few can actually make it.” Now she felt like she was lecturing him, which she didn’t do it on purpose — she was just so frustrated. “What do you want from me, baby?” She sighed.

Sam

sam knew that it took an awful lot of luck to break into the business. he wasn’t so naive to think that all you needed to have was talent and ambition to make it. it also took a lot of luck. if it hadn’t been for eevee’s wealth and connections, he doubted that the band would have made anything of themselves, as short lived as that was. but was it really worth all of this? we’re there not other ways to go about building status and gaining exposure? but her final question to him had sam furrowing his brow in hurt confusion. “i guess i just hoped that this was enough,” he said, gesturing between them, his own frustration as the situation creeping into his voice. “you are all i want, and i feel like i can’t even have that. at least not all of you. not the way i want.”

Sky

What Sam said next make her heart ache. They had agreed to this. Sure. But it was turning out to be much harder than what they had originally thought. Sky hated Mat. Sure, he was a dick. But she hated looking at him and knowing that he was the one keeping her and Sam from being happy together. Or was she the one that was doing that? “Sam...” she sat down next to him again. “I’m sorry. I want to be the one that makes you feel happy and loved. But...can I ask where this is coming from? Was it just what happened tonight with us? Or is there something else?” Sky empathized with how he felt, she tried to at least, but she still wasn’t sure where this was all coming from. “Please talk to me.” She begged, grabbing his hand with both of hers.

Sam

sam hesitated, looking away from her but allowing her to take his hand in hers. "i guess it started in the dining room," he began. "what mat said- it got to me. and i was starting to have doubts, not about us but about... i mean we really should have thought this through... and then i ran into ellie and we got to talking about what i deserve and i can't help but wonder..." sam's blue eyes met sky's. there was an apprehension there, like he was afraid that what he was about to say would change things between them, though he wasn't sure how. "am i not enough for you?"

Sky

She looked away from him, her heart skipping a beat once their eyes met. Sky took a sharp breath in at the mention of his ex. So that’s where all of this was coming from. What a fucking bitch. How dare she try to sabotage her relationship like that. But also why was Sam talking to his ex about their relationship. “Why the fuck were you talking to Ellie fucking Robertson about our relationship?” She deflected, standing up in a huff. “Sam, I love you. This is just a damn job. You are endgame. This job is not.” She said, pointing to Sam.

Sam

anytime sam mentioned ellie in the past to sky he’d gotten little short responses like “i like ellie” or some other noncommittal comment. while he didn’t expect the two to be best friends he definitely didn’t expect sky to be so pissed about sam talking to her. “what..?” he asked, kind of taken aback by her response. “she’s my friend, sky. one of the only friends i have left and the only other person in my life aside from my aunt who knows what the fuck is going on,” he said, standing as well. “if i can’t talk to her about us who am i supposed to talk to? nobody knows about us. and you know what?” sam asked, eyes growing dark with anger. “i think a lot of the things she was saying made a whole lot of sense.” he huffed at her response about the job, having a difficult time not rolling his eyes at her. “if this is just a damn job, why were you so desperate to take it? the day i come to you to talk, to see if we can get past what separated us in the first place, you tell me you want to take on another job! but i was so...” sam gritted his teeth, taking a hand through his hair as he tried to collect himself. he was having little success. “i was so stupid! so desperate to hold on to you that i said yes! only for this to happen,” he said, gesturing wildly around them. “and we’re right back to where we were the first time around.”

Sky

Sky was a big drama queen, so as one can imagine her reaction to what he was saying may have been a bit over the top. But sky was hurt. Mostly because she know that Sam was right. She hadn’t been fair to him, and he did deserve better but sky wasn’t ready to admit that even to herself. When Sky decided to take the job, she had no idea how hard it would be on him. On their relationship. Sky looked like a hurt puppy as he spoke, then let some silence fall over them for only a brief moment. “I...” she stuttered. “Why did you say something? Why didn’t you tell me not to take it? Why did you wait until you got pissed to say something? You wait til things blow up before you actually say something. You’re right. Now here we are. Back to where we started.” She huffed, trying to hold back those damn tears but the spilled over her eyes and down her cheeks. “What do you want me to do, Sam? I can’t lose you.”

Sam

sam’s jaw set and he gave her a long look. the anger had mostly faded into sadness because he really hated seeing her like this and he hated even more that he’d been the cause. “i wanted to be better. i wanted us to be better. and after losing eevee like that i-“ he looked down at his feet, heart heavy in his chest. “i couldn’t lose you sky. i would have said anything to be with you. i love you.” he looked up at her, his eyes pleading. he didn’t know how to fix this but he so desperately wanted to. his heart clenched at the sight of her tears and he wanted more than anything to take her into his arms and hold her. but he knew it would only make this harder. “you can’t quit... not now, not after signing a contract. i’d never ask you to do that. but maybe...” he sighed, feeling his own eyes prickle with the beginnings of tears. “maybe we should take some time?” he hadn’t meant it to come out like a question. but the words coming out at all had already been a struggle. and he knew that he had drink in him and that emotions were running high... but it was hard to see another solution.

Sky

That was it. That’s when sky absolutely lost it. Her stomach actually hurt and she felt like she was going to vomit. This wasn’t happening. He was right. She couldn’t quit. She’d be breaching her contract and she’s be our hundreds of thousands of dollars. As much as she wanted people to believe it, Sky wasn’t rich and there was no way she’d be able to pay that. She sat down across the room from him, looking anywhere else but in his eyes as she reminded herself to breathe. “You-you’re...breaking up with me?” The words coming out her mouth didn’t even seem real, and — fuck — they hurt so much. Sky loved Sam more than she had loved anyone in her entire life, and sky didn’t always know what to express that. Damn trauma. She cried into her hands for a significant amount of time, before wiping the tears off of her swollen face. She wanted to protest, fight for him...but she also wanted to save at least some of her dignity. “I don’t know what to say, Sam...I love you. I...don’t want this. But I also hate what this is doing to you...” she admitted. Sam really had gotten the short end of the stick in this agreement, and it wasn’t fair of her to ask him to suffer in silence for her sake. “Will it make you happier? If we take a break?” She rasped.

Sam

fuck. as soon as he’d said it he wanted to take it back for this very reason. but he knew that this was probably the best for the both of them or else they might make themselves so miserable that it wasn’t worth the fight. sam didn’t want to believe that was true but with each passing day it was getting harder and harder to cope. he crossed the room and knelt beside her, hesitant at first, though eventually he put a hand on her knee. “hey,” he said to her, his voice a small whisper. “don’t think of it like that. i love you so much, sky and i want to be with you. you make me so happy. but this...? this isn’t good for either of us. i mean look at us.” he was quiet for a moment. “how much longer until the deal is done..?” the last time sam had asked the question sky had told him it could take a year’s time. that seemed excruciating but sam knew that he loved sky so much that he could wait. “once this is over and done... maybe then we’ll really give it a fair chance.” this was probably one of if not the hardest thing sam had ever done. he was so used to people in his life leaving him and here he was, letting go of the thing that made him the happiest.

Sky

"A...A few more months." It didn't seem like that long, but she didn't want Sam to feel like this a minute longer. Sky hated that she ever made the love of her life feel that way. Had she really been so self centered that she didn't stop for a moment to think about what this was doing to Sam? She tried to covered it up with gifts and pretty words, but that only went so far. "I'm sorry...I'm sorry." She said between breaths. "Th-this is all my fault." Even though, realistically, they both agreed to this without really thinking twice about it. They were just so eager to call each other theirs again that they didn't think about the logistics of all this. She finally took her head out of her hands and looked up at him. "I love you so much." She did. She really did. Even though she had a real shit way of expressing it. No one, except Sam, had ever taught her how to love so she was really just winging this.

Sam

sam couldn’t hold back any longer. he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her in close, closing his eyes as he nuzzled her head with his cheek. “hey, none of that now...” though it had been good to get everything out there, he regretted being so harsh with his words. he cared about her so much. “we both agreed to this, yeah? a few more months isn’t bad at all. i’ll be working, you’ll be working, and before you know it i’ll be cheering you on at opening night for rent, okay?” and then hopefully things would be right between them and they could finally be happy with no conditions. “i love you too. so so much.”

Sky

Sky sobbed into his shoulder, probably getting his shirt all gross and snotty but she couldn't seem to find the energy to care about that now. "o...kay." she sobbed, her breath hitching. She hated this. She hated Mat. She hated Ellie. And there was a large part of her that hated herself for letting things get this out of control. She regretted ever taking that damn job in the first place. They stayed in that embraced for a while. It seemed like neither of them wanted to be the first to let go. At least that was Sky's interpretation of it. If they let go, then that meant that this was really over.

Sam

sam held her close to him, rubbing her back soothingly as he tried to calm her down. this all really sucked but sam wanted sky to know that this wasn’t goodbye. he quietly began humming her the melody of the song he’d written for her. he’d hoped the gesture would be both comforting and reassuring though he managed to bring himself to tears in the process. once he’d finished, he planted a small kiss to the top of her head before pulling away to look at her. he wiped away a few of her stray tears and smiled sadly at her. “this isn’t over for us, yeah?” and he held out his pinky to her. “you and me forever. promise.”

Sky

It was probably impossible for Sky to stay mad at Sam for long. Especially when he hummed to her like that, held her like that. It seemed he was always her rock - he'd held her like this and hummed to her while they were in the hospital waiting to see Eevee. Sam cared about other people more than he cared about himself. He also didn't see his worth, and Sky knew that she had done a bad job of helping him see it. Sky was fucking blessed to be loved by him, and even though that it may have been over for them now, Sky wasn't going to stop fighting for him. He deserved that much.

#discord #sam #not sam and I making each other cry at 1am

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