#I actually own masks just like both of these!

[ironunderstands]

Yapping about why I love Aventio and what I feel makes it a great ship 

(If you hate it I urge you to read this, because you don’t have to agree with me, but I want you to get where Aventio shippers are coming from at least)

I’ve just really wanted to talk about why I love Aventio because the people do not get it like I do and GODDD ITS SO GOOD WHEN DONE CORRECTLY UGHHHHH

Also this is gonna be VERY stream of consciousness I do not have a plan besides dragging you through my brain so enjoy the ride.

I guess the best place to start is the fact that Aventurine and Ratio are my two favorite characters in the game. Like even if they have no interactions with each other ever and might as well be from different pieces of media I would ship them, because I like seeing characters I like interact and the fun police cannot catch me. That’s a really shallow personal reason though and I feel like the rest I have will be able to be appreciated by others.

GOD THE DYNAMIC IS SO GOOD RAAAAAA

Two emotional constipated dumbasses circling around each other like black holes trying desperately to deny and run from their feelings when they have both fallen hard. The lack of acknowledgement of feelings on both ends is TRAGIC and it makes me want to rip my eyes out in a good way, let’s start with Ratio.

Unfortunately my glorious king Ratio has been mischaracterized to hell and back but we will get to that (and the Incorrect Reasons Why People Hate Aventio) later. Instead I will go over his actual character; a deeply insecure, intelligent man who desperately wants the rest of the galaxy to come to the realizations he has long since stumbled upon, but has been so isolated from his peers from such a young age that he’s doomed to fail in literally every social interaction he has and be misunderstood by both the audience in universe and irl (the autistic coding isn’t helping him either).

Ratio is tragically misunderstood again, both in universe and by the audience, which is why it means so much that Aventurine Gets Him. Aventurine pushes his buttons, tears down that literal cold marble facade masking the deeply silly and caring man beneath (this man bathes with rubber duckies in the privacy of his own home 😭), and that scares the shit out of Ratio. People aren’t meant to see through him, Ratio acts rude not just because he believes it’s the best way to help people, and because he believes he himself is mundane and the conclusions they come to should be their own, not his.

No, it’s also because on some level Ratio is afraid to be vulnerable around people. As much as he pretends like it doesn’t affect him, Nous’s rejection has hurt and haunted Ratio for his entire life. And I do mean his entire life, even in high school he had already set up a strict routine for himself, something commented on by his teacher, Ratio has quite literally always been striving for some sort of perfection and the fact that he cannot achieve it kills him.

Moreover, the guy just grew up way too fast, he didn’t have time to develop social skills. We see it in that afformentioned relationship with his teacher, in which they recommend Ratio (who is again in high school) to be moved up to college level stuff and transferred due to his success. He has quite literally never been able to just relax in a environment of his peers, Ratio for some reason we don’t yet know has always been dedicated to constant improvement and that leaves no room for dealing with failure.

On some level, he knows this too, that he can never be perfect. Ratio is part of the Mundanites in the Intelligenica Guild for a reason, he doesn’t just see himself as mediocre because he believes everyone is and that’s ok, but also because he looks down on himself for being too mediocre for the Genius Society, being too mediocre for Nous’s acknowledgement, being too mediocre for anything.

Which is tragic because Ratio is very accomplished and he is very smart, and his character stories aren’t even told from his pov, but rather in the style of documentaries and letters (his professor) and other works on his well acclaimed life. We don’t ever get to see how Ratio really sees himself, just the tiny cracks in his marble facade that let the real man behind the character shine through.

Because that’s what he’s playing 90% of the time, a character. Whether it be at the Herta Space Station in which his real goal was to uproot the researchers blind worship of the Genius Society, or in Penacony in which he plays up the arrogant, narcissistic scholar both people in universe and irl make him out to be, both to serve a goal bigger than himself. 

Sincere moments from Ratio are RARE but god are they beautiful, his conversation from Screwllum in 1.6 and his note to Aventurine in 2.1 will forever haunt me in the best way possible. If you want to understand Ratio as a character, yes read his character stories, but just watch that damn scene with Screwllum it is phenomenal. He cares so much and is so, so bad at expressing it, he drives me nuts, Veritas Ratio the man you are. 

And the thing is, it seems like he’s always been playing a character and doesn’t know where the real him ends anymore so he just sticks to the way people perceive him a lot of the time. Like as a kid he was constantly striving to be the best so he missed a lot of necessary developmental shit, and as an adult he’s a celebrity so it’s hard for him to attach himself to others anyways because society and his students will hound him for it.

And then you throw Aventurine into the mix, and oh boy does shit get interesting.

Veritas Ratio, perfect “unfeeling” Veritas Ratio and the one person who gets him well enough to push all his buttons and expose the vulnerable underbelly he thought he hid so well. On a fundamental level, Ratio understands this, which is why he doesn’t bother with the alabaster head, as pretending the real him is just as unfeeling and uncaring is easier.

So he brushes off Aventurine’s jests as if they are an insult to his very existence, he can’t look in Aventurine’s eyes when he “betrays” him because his poker face would break, he leaves as soon as he’s done talking because lingering would allow the weight of their conversations to sink in. Part of it is because for pretty much all of Penacony, up until the note Ratio gives him, Ratio is acting, trying to play up the role of the arrogant, unfeeling scholar to make Sunday buy the betrayal plan, because to Sunday this behavior is signs of a bad relationship between the two (honestly the fact that the audience also interpreted it this way makes me mad like did yall seriously not pay attention, but also happy because if even the players were fooled that means Sunday buying it is believable). 

However, even if it feeds into his insecurities, Aventurine knows that false facade and loves tearing it down. It’s very telling that the second time we see Ratio really freak out (the first being at Herta Space Station) is at the suggestion that he came to narrate Aventurine’s demo not because of knowledge or respect for the show or whatever, but because he genuinely likes the guy. What makes it even better is that Aventurine is the one who suggested it, and already figured out the excuses Ratio was going to use to deny it. Ratio can fool everyone else in the galaxy, but he cannot fool Aventurine, and on a fundamental level that is what makes their dynamic work, because Ratio knows Aventurine in the exact same way.

Aventurine can shove away people who care about him, out of distrust and fear that they will leave him like his family did. He can believe he’s unloveable and a person so detestable that even the actions he performs in order to stay alive condemn him to hate himself as much as the rest of the galaxy hates him. But, Ratio doesn’t see him that way.

Aventurine doubts his intelligence, if he has really earned anything he’s done and in his voiceline about Ratio, doubting if Ratio even sees him as smart or worthy. However, Ratios voiceline about Aventurine is about how he believes Aventurine is smart and worthy, and that his doubt will be his downfall if he doesn’t come to the realization that he isn’t worthless. 

Ratio knows Aventurine’s one weakness, the one thing that could stop him; himself. That’s why he gives him the note urging him to stay alive and keep on living because ultimately Aventurine will only ever fail if he gives up. And The Note Is Enough, Aventurine walks into the event horizon of a black hole, confident he can return alive on the other side because someone cares about him, BECAUSE RATIO CARES ABOUT HIM, and wants him to live on even if Aventurine doesn’t feel that way towards himself.

In the metaphorical and literal manifestation of the meaningless of the universe, in the face of overwhelming nihility, Aventurine survives because someone loves him, and with that love he’s strong enough to brave even that. 

Even if they can’t admit it out loud, these two deeply, deeply care for one another and trust each other perhaps more than anyone else in the narrative. The betrayal plan would have never worked if there was not mutual trust, Ratio wouldn’t have gone to Penacony in the first place if he didn’t trust Aventurine, and Aventurine wouldn’t have asked him to come if he did not trust him. We don’t just see this trust between Aventurine and Ratio either, and Jade and Topaz both trust him with their cornerstones, but ultimately it’s Ratio who’s physically with him the whole time, risking his life alongside him for the sake of their plan. 

As much as people like to ignore it, lying to the Family members, to Sunday, is extremely dangerous and puts Ratio’s life in danger as much as it does Aventurine’s. Ratio is not an irrational person, he wouldn’t have done that if he didn’t have faith Aventurine would succeed, he would not have done if he didn’t think he would return. They have absolutely faith in one another and it’s beautiful. 

Aventurine’s first constellation is named “Prisoner’s Dilemma” for a reason. A social experiment in which two prisoners are captured and separated, if they sell the other one out and remain silent, they go free but the other remains in jail for 20 years. If they both sell each other out, they get a sentence of 5 years. 

But if they both remain silent, trust the other, they even if they physically can’t communicate and don’t know what the other says, they get the best possible outcome, only one year in jail each. It requires a sacrifice on both ends, they both still have to go to jail, but only for a year, and only if they trust each other completely, as if the other sells them out they will be in jail for 20.

The prisoners dilemma relies completely on trust, and it’s the exact situation Aventurine and Ratio face in the Penacony quests. Aventurines doubts if Ratio’s betrayal was real or not, even if he set it up himself, and Ratio worries about Aventurines survival, if continuing this plan will end well. “You can’t expect a featherless bird to take flight” isn’t just Ratio chastising Sunday, he’s genuinely worried that this plan will put Aventurine at too much of a disadvantage to continue on. 

But they both trust each other, and if just like in the Dilemma neither come out completely unscathed (although it’s much worse on Aventurine’s end), they ultimately achieve their goal. 

God is it sweet and corny in the best way possible 

I want to kill this fandoms perception of stoic, emotionless Ratio because once people realize he’s actually the corniest mf ever is the day I sleep easy. He makes statues of himself doing Jojo poses, he plays chess versus himself, he named himself Veritas (truth), he loves rubber duckies, he literally sits in a bathtub couch, and Aventurine breaths and he gets flustered.

Ratio so deeply silly, chronically corny, it’s a crime he needs to be locked up someone stop him. 

And Aven brings that out of him. His teasing reveals the goofball trying so desperately to disguise himself as a serious scholar. Ratio is very smart of course, but that only makes his silliness better, as you watch this absolute genius of a man behave like a tsundere schoolgirl. 

It’s not like Aventurine is some paragon of seriousness either, he’s the one teasing Ratio, fucking around even in a serious mission. Yeah it’s partly because he wants Sunday to think he’s incompetent, but it’s also because Aventurine genuinely is having fun, enjoying himself before the serious part of the plan kicks in, and the meantime he does that by messing with Ratio.

Their dynamic of Aventurine messing with Ratio, and Ratio trying desperately to pretend like it doesn’t affect him is as hilarious and heartwarming as it is tragic, and that dichotomy is why I love them so much. It’s fun and it hurts so so much because their interactions being this flavor of silly leaves almost no room for the sincerity they both desperately need from one another. 

AND GOD I NEED IT TO HAPPEN. RATIO MENTAL BREAKDOWN SCENE PLEAASEEE LET HIS WALLS CRUMBLE PLEEEEAASEE PLEASE PELADE PLEASEEEE EPLES DOLS AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA 

They’ve gotten closer and closer and closer and soon something’s gonna snap because they are so close yet so distant and if something doesn’t change the tension is just gonna boil over AND I NEED IT TO HAPPEN. I need more Ratio scenes I need more interactions with him I need him with his guard down I need him to profess out loud that he cares about Aventurine I need him to break please he needs it, it would be so good for him. It doesn’t even have to be from Aventurine, just Ratio snapping and revealing the fucking mess he is under his facade and not being rejected by the people he cares about for it is enough.

I honestly doubt it will happen in the story though, as much as I want it to. Although Aventurine’s character demo somewhat changed my mind against this, I feel like hoyo is like “ok they get the vibe between these two we can move on” and the shippers are left to extrapolate how this relationship would go beyond what it is now. As much as I want a breakdown scene for Ratio in general, it probably wouldn’t happen in a while but devs if you are reading this PLEASEEEE. 

The only time Ratio ever gets slightly out of his element is with Aventurine but I need it to go further because god it would be interesting.

Well I’ve deemed that enough yapping about why I love Aventio (for now 😈) so let’s talk about why people hate the ship and why most of the reasons behind it a fucking stupid. (Massive disclaimer of course you can dislike it it’s just a lot of the “oh it’s a horrible ship and anyone who likes it sucks” shit isn’t grounded in reality in the slightest and I’m tired of the slander)

“Ratio was racist to Aventurine”

Now this is a spicy one because if this post was made in 2.0 I would 100% agree with you (during that time I shipped a non canon version of them in which that did not happen because how dare u do my boy like that hoyo). However 2.1 changed a lot and I mean a lot, and basically reframed the 2.0 quests for everyone.

Essentially, Ratio and Aventurine were both acting in that argument scene, making the things Ratio said to Aventurine not how he really sees him, and actively something Aventurine wanted him to say, so you cannot blame him for what he said. I’m not even joking or exaggerating, retrospectively it quite literally does not make sense if you view it in any other way, and honestly even with just the knowledge of 2.0 the scene doesn’t make sense if played straight, so let’s get to why.

a) Ratio and Racism do not mix fundamentally. Ratio is a person who believes that everyone deserves and education regardless of background, that it is a scholars duty to help others achieve that, and no matter who you are, you are capable of intelligence, learning and becoming the best version of yourself, and that those qualities are just limited to geniuses.

THIS AND RACISM DO NOT MIX. “Oh yeah education and improvement is possible for everyone except this specific group of people for some fucking reason!!” Like not only would this scene being serious contradict Ratios entire character, the man who believes people should not be judged for their educational background judging Aventurine for his educational background (that’s actually what the Sigonian upbringing line meant, it was mistranslated in the EN version)??!?!! Make it make sense.

Moreover, half this perception also come from the fact that hoyo made the incredible writing decision of naming Aventurines planet after a slur for Romani people, so unfortunately literally anytime its name, Sigonia, is brought up you’re essentially saying a slur. It’s much worse in the CN version, in EN it’s not obvious at all, because our version of the slur (it starts with a g and ends with a y that’s all the hints you’re getting), doesn’t look like the version of the slur that the name for Sigonia was derived from, which is partly the source of this misconception as I’m pretty certain most people assumed Ratio (and by extension Sparkle) said a slur elsewhere in the conversation when in reality them referring to Avens ethnicity/background/planet IS the slur.

Anyways terrible writing decisions aside, Ratio supposedly being racist doesn’t just contradict his core motivation, it contradicts his job. He’s a scholar, for fucks sake, and racism is inherently illogical. Mmm yes I’m gonna base my identity around finding truth for myself and I will believe government and social propaganda about specific groups of people! Very logical, very scholarly, we all clapped. 

So yeah, doesn’t make sense on a character level, to the point that in 2.0 I concluded that they must be using Ratio as a plot device in that scene to deliver some of Aven’s backstory to the audience due to how OOC it was for him 😭. However I wasn’t necessarily wrong, Ratio was delivering some of Aventurines backstory to AN audience (not just us), and he was behaving OOC in the 2.0 scene, but it was on purpose.

b) The betrayal plan 

Aventurine forms a plan in which him and Ratio pretend to betray one another in order to sneak the Aventurine cornerstone into the dreamscape by replacing it with the Topaz stone (red herring + black hole scene dialogue implies she and Jade are there for other reasons) and the Jade stone (perfect dupe). 

Now this betrayal hinges on Sunday, their main antagonist buying it, actually believing that Ratio would betray Aventurine on a mission as important as Penacony, and it requires Sunday also buying that he is winning the whole time, that the loss of the cornerstones was somehow a fumble on Aventurine’s end rather than something he planned all along. 

So, they stage the 2.0 conversation. Ratio yells at Aventurine for losing the cornerstones, something which was part of their plan the whole time. He then insults Aventurine’s background allowing Aventurine to reveal key details of his past that Sunday would not have learned otherwise, which he uses in the trial against Aventurine. Seriously, Aventurine only found out he was the last Avgin when he became a Stoneheart, do y’all think Sunday summoned that info with his mind or something during the trial (like do you guys genuinely think Sunday read his wiki or something)

Moreover, Ratio not only insults him, but portrays Aventurine as useless, disposable to the IPC because he is apparently already sentenced to death. Why does he do this? Well, so Sunday feels confident enough to do the same to Aventurine. Seriously, sentencing an IPC member, especially a high ranking one to death is a risky move, even for someone as convicted as Sunday, he would need the confidence to do so and learning Aven might already die would give him that ability. 

Because well, it doesn’t matter that much if he’s already going to get disposed of in the near future. I also think the IPC plans to use Aventurine’s “death” as leverage against the family because they were pleased to hear of his death sentence according to Dr. Ratio, meaning a) he likely did not have one from them at the time, although in the past he was sentenced to death and b) even if Aventurine succeeded in getting the cornerstone his seeming loss in the rest of the conversation wasn’t actually a loss at all, getting sentenced to death/“dying” at the very least was part of the plan all along as the IPC could still use it as leverage if things went south.

Continually, Ratio treating Aventurine in the exact same sh1tty way the rest of the galaxy does perfectly slots him into the arrogant, uncaring scholar role, which Sunday knows are some of the most easily manipulated people in the galaxy, considering he tries to bribe Ratio with knowledge about Stellarons it seems he bought this idea hook line and sinker. Sunday isn’t even subtle about it either “I heard you and your companion haven’t been getting along lately” where did he hear that from? Ratio didn’t tell him, and even though we know Sunday was 100% watching the two of them on their little adventure pre-meeting him (the bird and hound statues) that scene hasn’t happened yet so where did he get that from?

Some other interesting proof for it is that the Final Victor lightcone likely depicts Aventurine trying to convince Ratio of this plan of his, the events of which must occur  pre-Penacony for several reasons, the least of which being that we just never see it happen on Penacony which if you think it did we would see it. Moreover lightcones are canonically condensed memories and the Final Victor lightcone released in 2.0, meaning it’s the memory of something that happened before then. 

All signs point to the 2.0 scene, the one people use to paint Aventio as toxic being staged. And I have so much more evidence for this, (Ratio would never agree to go without a plan, Aven clearly formed his pre-Penaocny, so much of the plan like Ratio opening the cornerstone box, which he can’t do up until the betrayal as it’s in Sundays possession, rely on him arriving knowing how to do so, the time discrepancies, the complete 180 in personality Ratio would have to do to go from distrusting Aventurine to putting his whole faith in him, etc), but I will reupload one of my old slideshows to elaborate more on it. Basically the one thing that people use to say it’s toxic is not true and is in fact a greater show of the trust between those two. 

“The shippers are all weird and racist” 

Now this one actually has some truth to it because yes there are some incredibly fucking weird Aventio shippers and I do not blame yall for disliking them.

HOWEVER, most Aventio shippers are normal and hate that shit just as much as you guys do. Like do you realize most shippers also really like these characters and have something insane called morals so they don’t automatically excuse racist fujoshi goobers just because they are making content for their favorite ship. Trust me someone doing that pisses me (and most other Aventio shippers) off significantly more than people who hate the ship. Also free Ratio from this shit man poor guy is getting mischaracterized as a slaveowner by his fans and haters 😭

And like guys, have you ever been in a fandom before, like ever? Weirdos are always gonna be weird and it’s not Aventio’s fault they are this months victims. For a fun little example of how gross other fanbases can be, one of the most popular Overwatch ships on ao3 is Genji Shimada X Hanzo Shimada WHO ARE BLOOD RELATED BROTHERS. THERES LIKE 300+ FICS OF IT, SHIMADACEST IS LITERALLY A TAG ON THERE. I WAS IN THE TRENCHES SEARCHING FOR GENJI HANZO ANGST FICS (Hanzo killed Genji it’s complicated doomed siblings will always get me) AND HAVING TO COMB THROUGH THOSE ABOMINATIONS IN THE PROCESS.

Like please I’m relatively new to fandom culture but yall cannot be acting like this is weird for fans to do, it’s weirdo behavior but it is not unique to the HSR fandom or even Aventio. And even if understandably this makes you not like the ship, don’t paint the people who enjoy it as being the people who do this kinda sh1t. It’s not our fault peak gets tainted by miserable creatures ok, let normal ppl have their harmless fun and stop lumping people together into a monolith. 

?????

Well that’s it that’s all the “valid” reasons people have for hating Aventio, at least the ones I can remember. Everything else is just personal opinion and not at all an objective reason.

“They’re so sibling coded!”

Anyways again obviously you can still dislike it not everything is for everyone, I really just wanted to make this post to demonstrate why I and many others like it, and why the reasons people use to say it’s problematic are incorrect. Feel free to call it mid, block it whatever I don’t care, just don’t harass shippers for having some harmless fun, because the characters aren’t real but the people who like them are and in doing so you are really just being a jerk for no reason. If you somehow hate Aventio and read this the whole way through I congratulate you on your ability to actually listen to other people, and regardless of whether you changed your mind or not I respect you for doing so anyways. Thanks for reading and I would love to hear your thoughts. 

#Hsr #honkai star rail #dr ratio #aventurine #aventio #raturine #ratiorine #golden ratio #tags for reach bc I need ppl to read this sorry #Also apologies to the Genji/Hanzo shippers for catching strays yall tend to mind your business and tag ur shit #So I can’t blame you that much for it even if I find it gross bc if I don’t wanna see it it’s very easy to not see it #I just wanted to give an example of how the hsr fandom is not unique in its weirdness #Ppl are horrible at tagging shit in this fandom #The next time I read an Aventio fic w surprise dubcon I’m gonna die #Anyways I hope you enjoyed reading bc this was sm fun to write #Aventio is peak we all cheered #aventurine hsr #dr ratio hsr

[a66-1]

HI OMG i just read all your stuff and theyre so GOOD AGHH!;!3)2):&;&??? and for any requests how about another docile!simon because hes SOO CUTE IM IN LOOVEE or a childhood!best friend 😮‍💨😮‍💨

crying and throwing up bc AHH

tysm omg..

it's giving I should do both of these

Childhood bestfriend!Simon (who's a docile soul) x Reader.

a/n: major fluff ❤️

what was a661 listening to? (Homesick by Noah Kahan, Sugar Sweet by Benson Boone, Young Blood by Noah Kahan, Like Real People Do by Hoizer)

Unedited and not proofread

Simon and you go way back, and I mean way back. You knew this boy since he learned how to tie his shoe. (Unsurprisingly you had to teach him because what the heck are you doing to the laces?)

You lived slightly south of Manchester, and only really saw Simon when your parents met up every month or so, but you and Simon were essentially locked at the hip when you two were around each other. Pinkies bound together as you walked around the pond, watching the swans swim in the water. His smile was always so.. Soft. Never a big, excited smile. One where you knew he was comfortable.

His older brother always scoffed at the two of you, opting to stick by his parents and yours as they sat on a bench, as they talked amongst themself. Simon Unhooked his pinkie from yours as he bent by a few rocks, looking through them.

"Hey, come 'ere." He gestured you over. You crouched next to him. He picked a few weed flowers, and plopped on the ground to tie the bottoms together. When he was done, he handed them to you.

"There! For you. They're really pretty." He smiled softly, as you took them. You laughed quietly, and hugged him.

"Thank you, Si." You said quietly, before pecking his cheek. You heard your mom yell at you to get your hands off eachother, as you two are only 8 and 10.

You two separate, and walk back over to your parents. Simon had a pink hue to his cheeks, but nothing he couldn't not excuse as sunburn.

Once you got in your rickety car back to your house, it's not like you knew you'd never see him again. You were packed and already on the plane 3 weeks later.

The absolute meltdown you had in the airport had your mom threatening to ductape your mouth shut, and you're pretty sure you cried all the way to America.

-

You lift your head, noticing your spot in line has moved up, again. You shift forward, a basket of food in your arms. You got your own places little over a year ago. Freedom feels.. Great, actually, nobody is on your ass and you can freely drive anywhere without a 'where tf are you??' text.

You get to the register, and give a polite nod and 'I'm good, and you?' Your accent still catches a few people off guard. Fucking hell, this state is absolute shit sometimes. Just because some people aren't the same as you, you don't gotta be weird about it-

It's not even like it's heavy, it's just slightly there. Growing up with the most British parents in a very not British town has got your accent all odd, but if anyone from Manchester heard you, they might be able to decipher you.

You take your bags and walk to your car, loading it. Just one more thing in the list... Ah, the pet shop. The place isn't far, so you lock your car and start your walk on the way there.

A few Military officers stand a block away, across the street. They don't look quite American, in all actuality, isn't that the flag from-

You abruptly run into someone. Fuck. God, why don't you keep your eyes open every once in a while? You take a step back, rubbing your nose. Crap, they had a hard fucking chest, because your nose feels half broken.

"My bad, I'm so sorry-" You glance up to notice an military officer. You stand straighter, noticing the Union Jack flag. The guy has gear on, and a.. Ghost mask? A bavaclava, I'm pretty sure, and some eye black.

"It's.." He squints, pausing, before continuing, "Fine. It's fine."

That's an accent if you've heard one. God, it's familiar as crap, you know you've heard it before. Which parents had that accent again? Sounds like.. Jack's parents were more west...

"You uh.. You from here?" He gruffly asks, "Can tell you got an accent."

You shake your head, "I was born in Manchester, moved when I was 8, give or take."

His eyes widen this time, before cursing. He turns to the group of men further down, and throws a hand signal. They nod, and continued a conversation they were having.

"Oh? I had a friand who uh.. Who.." He hesitated, but he slipped off his mask.

"Who did that too."

You stared doe eyed at him. "Simon?"

That blonde hair is impossible to forget. You choke on a laugh, before grabbing his face. His nose is definitely different, but it looks like shits been broken.

"Holy shit, it's you." He smiled. Fucking hell, his smile.

"Jesus! What're you doing here, I mean- I-I never thought we'd-" You cut yourself off with a laugh, before hugging him tightly, your hands curling into his hair. He swiftly hugged back, rocking you softly. Goddammit, he looks good.

Good, good.

"Oh lovie, you can't understand how happy I am, I remember how you left and.." He stares at you quietly, and frowned. "Never really made another friend like you again."

That made you frown, "Si, you should've made friends! I was just the example!" You throw in a smile, to show him your joking.

You both find yourself laughing together, your hands back on his cheek, his hands on your hips. And.. Some reason naturally, you drifted closer and.. Kissed. Neither of you hesitated, it was swift and you kept his head against yours, and you made sure the kiss was good.

He was good.

You both pulled away, a soft look shared among you too.

"Are we gonna brush past that, or.." He laughed, and hugged you again, swinging you around once. You yelped, and hit his shoulder.

"Put me down!!" You squealed, laughing.

Price glanced over to the two of you, Soap turning as well.

"Tha' there mus' be tha' Bonnie he mentions," Soap nods slightly, smiling for his friend.

"Sure is. I knew he'd take this mission cuz' o' her." Price chuckled softly.

You carded through his hair softly, looking in his eyes.

"I missed you, Si."

AHH THE IINSPO FOR THIS HAD ME SENT WRITING THIS.

Never seen something like this so I feel accomplished not having a clue how to keep going.

TYSM FOR THE SUPPORT!!

Request to get more fun stories like this!

Bye babes!

-a661

#simon ghost riley x you #simon ghost x reader #simon riley x reader #simon ghost x you #simon riley x you #simon fluff #simon ghost riley #simon ghost riley x reader #simon riley #ghost x you #ghost x reader #ghost cod #simon ghost fluff #simon riley call of duty #call of duty x reader #ghost call of duty #mw2 ghost #a66-1 asks

[litnerdwrites]

Okay, but who owes who, really?

The Ic love to talk about how 'ungrateful' Nesta is and how they do so much for her, and how spending 500 gold marks is so terrible. But Feyre admits herself, it isn't the money that's the issue, it's what Nesta spent it on; Booze and food.

However, the IC are buying whole estates and drinking each other under the table at Rita's almost every night. So it's safe to infer that 500 gold marks isn't that much when compared to what the rest of the IC spend. If I remember ACOFAS right, they all have a communal fun money account too, which Nesta should be given access to, if she was a member of his court since the war ended. Especially since attending those events the IC make her attend, count as court work (as I'll explain later).

For now, I've decided to list everything I can think of that Rhysand owes Nesta.

We can start with paying her rent for the use of her property to facilitate the meeting. (Not letting them die or suffer emotional/physical damages from it should be given).

Paying her for organising and supplying anything needed for the meetings to happen (so like event organisation) since the Ic pretty much just showed up.

Payment for the trips she took to mail the letters.

Paying for the servants to leave during the day Feyre arrived, and during the meetings. This includes tasks the servants would've normally done during those days but didn't because they needed to be out.

Then there's restitution for bodily harm, and emotional damages from being kidnapped (To both Nesta, and Elain)

Payment for new accommodations, including food, clothes and other necessities.

We can also add on restitution for any property damages inflicted when Hybern broke in.

Restitution for emotional damages for when she was attacked in the library.

Payment for her services in training with Amren plus trying to fix the wall.

Payment for her work at the HL meeting, plus a bonus for the emotional tole it took on her.

Payment for her scrying.

Payment for the works she did around the war camp, like fetching buckets and wrapping wounds and stuff (since I bet every other soldier, nurse, healer, or whoever, was paid in one way or another).

Payment for being willing to cross the battlefield with Amren and Feyre, and Elain, putting their lives on the line to reach the cauldron.

Payment for saving Cassian from the cauldron.

Payment for being willing to go as bait to lure out the king.

A reward for actually killing the kind.

Reparations for their fathers' death.

Payment for each scrying session in ACOSF.

Payment for going to The Middle.

Reparations for emotional damages caused by the Kelpi when she went to find the mask.

A reward for actually getting the mask.

Payment for going to the prison.

Reparations for emotional damages in the prison.

A reward for finding the mask.

Payment for taking her made swords, unless the wanna return those.

Payment for every single meeting she attends with Eris, be it in Spring, The Middle, or wherever.

Reparations for being thrown into the blood right, for all three of them, (since the ones who kidnapped them where Rhysand's own soldiers, and given that they're camp lords, we can assume they have decent ranks)

A reward for killing Bryallin (even though it was literally the IC job, since they promised to do that in exchange for her training to fix the wall and find magic items.

Payment for the dancing in Hewn city.

Payment for every dancing lesson she spends her time doing with Morrigan.

Emotional damages for the verbal abuse she gets from each member of the IC.

Payment for her work in the library

Payment for her training (since both that and the library were forced onto her).

Reparations for evicting and demolishing her apartment.

Reparations for the emotional damages inflicted by the Illyrians who stare and gawk at her the whole time, and insult her behind her back and too her face.

Her father's inheritance (If he didn't leave a will, then it's divided up by inheritance law, which Emerie mentions, includes females now, in the NC. We can also assume, based on her interactions with her cousin, that his side of the family got very little after her father's death. So, we can assume his fortune, business contracts, properties, including ships and things would go to Nesta. A majority of it would, anyway.)

Oh, and payment for every party she attends. And I mean more than just rent. Since Amren wants to use the argument that Nesta is part of the court, then every party she attends, from the bridge party, to starfall, to solstice, is considered a work trip, and she needs to be paid in full. For each one.)

Plus, emotional damages caused by the fire, the insults from their court, and the fact that she was on a boat, over water, despite her trauma.

Moreover, we learn in ACOMAF that Rhys doesn't lowball what he pays his court or those who work for him. Meaning that it's reasonable to expect the amount he pays to be from the higher end of the threshold. So, depending of if Rhysand pays from the mid to high end of the threshold, the total amount he owes Nesta would be pretty close to or even well over the millions.

The 500 gold marks that Feyre was so upset about was a first for Nesta, so even if we add that to Nesta's expenditures over the past year, and subtract that from what she's owed, she'd still have a lot of money. Maybe it would still be in the millions too.

That said, this is all just speculation, since we don't know the irl value of a gold mark, or the exact expenses Nesta incurred during that one year. We also don't know for sure exactly how much Rhysand pays his court or his soldiers.

#anti inner circle #anti rhysand #pro nesta #anti acosf #nesta deserves better #pro nesta archeron #nesta acotar #anti amren #anti mor #anti ic #Rhys owes Nesta a shit tone of money #Given how wealthy her father was #There's a pretty good chance that his total wealth bordered in millions by the time he died #That should be split between the Archeron sisters #But Rhysand's own laws put females in the line of succession #Meaning Nesta should've gotten most #if not all of it. #I seriously hope she's at least being paid by HOFAS

[turtleblogatlast]

Here’s a thought-

When Splinter says Leo’s the leader at the end of Season 2…pretty sure he was joking.

After so many high stakes and high emotions, he (a bit cluelessly) makes a joke to add some levity, just to make things a bit easier for he and his sons to digest everything that happened. It was a lot that happened, so it makes sense that Splinter wants to make things that much softer for everyone.

But- making a joke like that, after everything they all just went through…I can definitely see how the events of the movie pave out in response.

For example, by joking about Leo in particular having the responsibility of a leader, that puts him directly in the sight of Raph’s building anxieties. Because after everything, it’s clear that Raph really started taking the hero name seriously to the point that he started undermining his own fun and childhood in the process. So in the eyes of a Raph who is so worried about what could happen if they’re not prepared again, Leo in particular kind of stands almost as a point of danger in that aspect.

And with the joke of Leo “leading” in any capacity ringing out over them, it’s easy to blame Leo and Leo alone whenever he goes and goofs off with Mikey and Donnie. I think as well that the concept of a leader being spoken after the Shredder just pushes more weight on Raph’s shoulders and makes him realize how much goofing off they did before when they should have been better heroes (despite them all just being kids...)

Raph knows his brothers are good, he knows and has pride in them and himself in turn, but it terrifies him to know that they won’t be ready for the next big threat, and Leo directly going against this caution even more than usual just pushes Raph to want to try more.

As for Leo- keep in mind what happened all throughout “Many Unhappy Returns.” Keep in mind what happened all throughout the series in general. In the former, Splinter more than once points out how he would rather have his other sons with him than Leo, especially because they “would take this seriously”…even though Leo was taking it seriously. (Not that Splinter should be expected to read what Leo was doing when Leo wasn’t making his plans clear, but that wording sticks with kids.) Even after Leo’s plan pulled through, Raph’s the one who spoke in trust of Leo, not Splinter.

As for what happens in the series in general…well, we see Leo mess up a lot, apologize a lot, get his brothers out of messes a lot, and even when he does well or is responsible it’s either glossed over or still seen as goofing off (no I will never be over that moment where Leo almost got Gus’s tags and got screwed over out of pure bad luck.)

So imagine hearing a joke like that as Leo, who for a good chunk of especially the start of the series has been a lowkey voice of reason. The idea that Leo being responsible for the team is nothing but a joke…? It’s understandable that it could feel like a blow, that it could push him to want to try less.

Especially after everything they just went through.

They’re heroes. | They’re kids.

Why shouldn’t they care? | Why should they care?

#rottmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt raph #rottmnt leo #rottmnt splinter #splinter is not a bad dad but words can always cause unintended harm especially to kids and teens #Leo being the voice of reason in Bug Busters only to be rewarded with a near death experience rip #if I was him I’d clock out too #side note but I actually really like how Bug Busters and the movie kinda parallel each other just with Raph and Leo’s roles swapped #(and obviously the movie is much higher stakes) #splinter: haha imagine blue as the leader wouldn’t that be funny #raph & leo: *speedrun into developing bad habits as a response* #shout out to Raph in the show’s finale he really stepped up #but then he just kept stepping until all he knew was being a hero and a team and not his own age 😞 #Raph and Leo’s dynamic means so much to me it really does #both of them are self made caricatures at the beginning of the movie! not their true selves!! BOTH lean away from these masks at the end!

[designernishiki]

it’s kinda funny to me how that dumb scene in kiwami 1 of majima getting shot and left for dead in the harbor was basically just added as a half-assed way to explain majima not being around for a bit of the plot, but they accidentally(?) just made it seem like start of a chain reaction where majima ended up feeling slighted and heartbroken after being abandoned like that and then lashed out about it via smashing a big truck into the building kiryu was in. and yeah that isn’t inherently a romantic thing as-is but then they go and add the part where majima grabs a hostess and performatively hits on her as in-kiryu’s-face as possible, she says she’s already in love with someone, and majima lets her go immediately, no questions asked, making a big fucking point of it just to say see THAT kiryu? I appreciate when people are HONEST about their FEELINGS. people who won’t just BACKSTAB someone who CARES about them to save themselves. is that so crazy kiryu?? huh??? anyway make it up to me get down here and fight me right fucking now

#I think on another level he was sorta saying like ‘hey kiryu. you’re making it extremely clear that you don’t trust me and my intentions #and I’ve been trying to show you- over and over again- that I’d do just about anything for you and your safety #but I can’t just let my mask fall off in front of everyone- I need to keep up the unpredictable morally grey wildcard act for both my sake #AND yours. because disguising my helping you as crazy random violent outbursts and weird stalker behavior #is the only way I CAN help you. do you think it would go over well with shimano or literally anyone else if I was outright helping you out #of the kindness of my heart and fondness for you? stop being so fucking dense and look past the crazy wacky nonsense for a second and #maybe you’ll realize that all I do at the end of the day- really- is help you and put my own life and reputation on the line for you. #I am an honest guy when it comes to my real values and when I told you I wouldn’t let anyone kill you unelss it was myself- I meant it. #I’ve taken a knife and a bullet for you now. can you REALLY not see through the act yet? am I REALLY that unpredictable when you think about #it?’ #that was a longer explanation than i intended but. it was difficult to put into words #I basically feel like it could be read as him implying kiryu shouldn’t backstab the people who put themselves on the line to help him #and/or pointing out that he’s never actually done kiryu dirty and has stuck to his word protecting him in the ways he can #trying to say yeah all this is a crazy act and all but when it comes down to it you Can trust me #it really makes sense when you think about it that he’d have to help kiryu/show affection towards kiryu in unpredictable convoluted ways #at that point in time because. I mean. there’s a reason he was the only person who showed up to welcome kiryu when he got out of prison #and that’s because A) he sticks to his word and his loyalty to people he cares about and B) no one else had the balls or the batshit insane #mask to wear to ward off anyone asking real questions like majima did. because ANYONE associating themselves with the supposed #patriarch-killer was a HUGE NO-NO at the time. someone important showing up for kiryu and welcoming him back outright could’ve caused #all-out warfare probably. except majima. because majima was dedicated and smart enough to use his widely-feared wildcard persona #(that everyone tended to view as incapable of having any Real agenda to worry about) to his And kiryu’s advantage #does that make sense??? I feel like it makes a lot of sense if you get it to click in your head #kazumaji #majima #kiryu #yakuza #kiwami 1 #yk1 #rambling

[coquelicoq]

what i love about the Famous Actor Natori Shuuichi of it all is that...it's not just that he's famous and therefore widely recognizable wherever he goes. like yes that is very funny because he was an exorcist before he became a famous actor, which means he CHOSE, on purpose, a day job that would make it harder to hide his double life/secret identity from the hordes of his adoring public, but it's more than that. it's not just that he's famous, it's that he's famous specifically for being an ACTOR, aka a person whose job it is to dissimulate, to make believe, to inhabit roles and emotions other than his own. like he decided he was going to become as visible as possible (which again was literally not necessary! he could have gone into any other career for his day job!!) but in such a way that everyone would see him but no one would see him - they would just see his various made-up personas, including the Famous Actor Natori Shuuichi persona. i can't decide if he's a genius or if he just made so many absurd decisions that they canceled each other out and circled back around to working out. he's either playing 9-dimensional chess or he's eating the pieces. too soon to say.

#the other thing i love about it is that in a very real sense it's his actor day job that is his alter ego #being an exorcist is his normie job. he's just a famous celebrity on the side #which isn't that uncommon in secret identity setups but it's still very funny #natsume's book of friends #natsume yuujinchou #natori shuuichi #natsuyuu meta #my posts #f #i think probably the actual answer is that acting was a very natural career choice because he already masks so extensively #both to hide that he can see things other people can't (and that youkai exist and that he exorcises them) #and to hide what he's really feeling so that no one can use it against him #so if it's already something he has to do & he's good at it...why not have someone tell him exactly how to do it & get paid for it? #and the other part of the answer is that most ppl don't go into acting assuming they'll get famous. the fame was a side effect #so each decision as it was being made probably made perfect sense. but put them all together #and you have this hilarious assortment of elements that seem to directly contradict each other #okay also i would be remiss if i didn't mention the other possible answer which is that the attention came first and was unavoidable #and the acting developed from the need to protect himself from the attention that he was going to be attracting no matter what he did #because he's so beautiful. and (in the exorcist world specifically) because he's the last of the natori #the more i talk about it the more i'm like no becoming a famous actor was the only path that made any sense for him lol #1) he's gonna be watched no matter what bc he's him -> gotta figure out how to hide his secrets -> learn to act as self-defense #or 2) he's got secrets -> he's gotten a lot of practice hiding them -> hey you could make a career out of this! #all roads lead to actor natori shuuichi. and since he's beautiful...all roads lead to FAMOUS actor natori shuuichi #i love it when i ramble so much in the tags that i end up contradicting my own post lol #he's neither thinking ten steps ahead nor is he irrational. he's simply making sensible individual decisions #that follow logically from what is available to him and what his priorities are

[gaydogmarriage]

ppl are always depicting cyno in fanon as a comic relief annoying idiot partner to tighnari that cannot read the room and is always making him angry and yeah he doesn't have the best social skills and doesn't understand other people that well, but he knows that. and he also knows tighnari well enough to know that if he truly was annoyed with his behavior to the point of getting angry, he would shut that shit down real quick. he's not the type of person to just sit there and take it if he's genuinely bothered, i think. cyno's just putting himself out there without letting himself be paralyzed by his own shortcomings or insecurities, and it's pretty clear tighnari doesn't want him to repress himself either.

if anything, i can see tighnari being the one with an annoying habit in private that he has 0 self awareness about because he's so used to being the one dealing with other people's bullshit that he may not realize when he's the culprit for once, and cyno is too much of an unbothered king to say anything about it, and too madly in love to stay annoyed for long lol

#cynonari #its especially baffling when ppl make tighnari be annoyed with cyno playing his funny card game and being goofy when at the end of his sq #tighnari shows up and sees that cyno isnt being his goofy self and immediately prescribes him playing cards to feel better. doctor's orders #and he plays with him himself. why would he participate in and encourage his friend's hobby if he hated it #i think they both smell like autism and both deal with socializing by projecting a lot of confidence and being bluntly honest #but in tighnaris case the way he expresses himself makes the confidence kinda mask the autistic vibes while cyno's puts them on full displa #basically i think cyno is fully self aware about his own autism swag he just doesnt feel like hiding it because that would just #make everything worse and more awkward #it rly sucks when people reduce their differences to tighnari being the smart mature adult and cyno being the idiot unserious manchild #feels like one of those situations where people are moreso applying fandom tropes that have been flanderized over time onto characters #without actually considering those characters as characters #i need to stop thinking about gay dog men and go to bed #occurs to me i should probably tag this as the ship in case someone's just looking up the characters and wants to filter it out? #idk tumblr's inconsistent about when it throws my posts into the spotlight and when it lets me stay in my corner

[pumpkinsouppe]

It breaks my heart that people think the hero of time’s story is just a tragedy

Ocarina of time is absolutely a tragedy, but Majora’s Mask is not

Majora’s Mask is one of the most hopeful pieces of media I’ve ever consumed. It has a bittersweet end, but you finish the game knowing that link will be okay, that he can and will survive on his own. Sure he had to leave his friends behind again, but he CHOSE to do that this time. He knew he couldn’t stay in Termina and he made the choice to be a child again.

I do not for a second believe his entire life is a tragedy, NOT after all of Majora’s Mask. The game specifically designed to be about healing and love. Idk where the theories that link died or became a child soldier (?????) came from but I feel like the entire message of Majora’s Mask was just completely lost on a ton of people 😭

#tiny rant bc sometimes I feel like I’m the only person who understands Majora’s mask 😭😭😭 #no I actually genuinely hate all the theories that link’s life went downhill after Majora’s mask #the entire story is about healing from grief and from wounds understanding your trauma #if link were to die or become a soldier that just spits on the entire message of the game #it spits on people going through similar experiences and tells them their life will never get better #THATS NOT THE MESSAGE AHHHHHH!!!!!!!! #the message is that things will be okay #life is hard now life will always be hard #but there are people who love and appreciate you and you are meaningful to this world #don’t let grief consume you #things will get easier one step at a time #I have so many positive thoughts and feelings about Majora’s Mask it’s genuinely such a great game #especially if you are also going through trauma or grief it really helped me understand my own feelings through both #tloz #Zelda souppe blurb

[princekirijo]

Istg I actually need to sit down and write a proper bio for Riku because even I get confused af as to what his personality is sometimes.

#oc tag #“but prince he's your oc how tf did this happen” he has a mind of his own trust me #i mean this is literally one of the parts of his character he is literally so good at adapting his personality #because he felt he needed to as a kid both in school and in the business world #that barely anyone knows what he's actually like #like one minute he's a suave overconfident guy who can take on anything #but hes also the quiet dude in class who never participates is probably asleep but somehow gets everything right and is top of the grade #he loves to flirt but will absolutely blue screen if anyone flirts back because despite the fact he flaunts himself- #he doesn't think hes attractive LMAO #his biggest motivation is spite and he doesn't know when to quit #this boy has so many fucking issues istg #def one of those characters who has so many masks that he hardly knows himself #i have a fear that he's nearly too complex to the point where he's a confusing character and i personally dont think thats a good thing #so i really hope that's not the case for you guys 😬 #over my break ive really spent time trying to iron out his character and just make him into soemthing im even more proud of you know #the good thing is that at least his story now has a clear arc and theme which im really proud of #so im gonna use that to build off and iron him out even more #the way i put more work into this funky dude i came up with than like my entire uni work #i love him so much sorry to be mentally ill about a guy i made because i liked a ship too much (and crossover i was having fun with too) #one day i will have a proper post for him with references and everything for him his outfits his personas the lot #one of these days

[seilon]

you know im realizing now. with the exception of a few resident psychiatrists, ive had like. no good experiences with mental health professionals

#most recent occurance is eating my brain alive right now because I feel just so. degraded and offended by how she chose to evaluate me #I won’t get into it because it will make me spiral even more and get angrier and more overwhelmed but tldr she didn’t acknowledge #anything I said about my symptoms both out loud and via written test. chose to ignore or dismiss anything that came from me #as if I couldn’t be trusted to recount my own experiences and feelings. also did not take into account that I am an adult and thus have Had #to learn to mask and shit so while she brushed off So Much Shit because i seemed (in the three hours she met/saw me) #functional Enough. that’s only becuaee I put in a Lot of effort every day to do so. and that effort does not last forever #and of course because. like I said I’m an adult. I’ve been yelled at I’ve been punished I’ve been put through courses and #through the ringer of Society in general to the point where I mimic Normal Person Behavior at least somewhat decently when im prepared to do #so. she treated me like a child and didn’t acknowledge most of my major issues. ignored me when I said I don’t avoid social situations out #of fear/anxiety I avoid them because it takes a lot of energy for me to mask and try and read people and act accordingly #and in her report suggested generalized anxiety. part of the reason I was there is because anxiety HASNT ever properly described my #avoidant behavior. #and just. yeah I said I wouldn’t get into it but here we are. this always happens #it’s just eating at me because I keep realizing more and more things she just fucking disregarded. literally wrote that I ‘listed many #relevant symptoms’ and kept it at that. did not actually give those symptoms any validity. basically just implied I was listing things #just. becuase? #some shit was just blatantly wrong like claiming that I have a variety of interests when I told her outright that I can only be interested #in one specific interest at a time- example being the entirety of last year being only interested in One (1) video game. and this is to such #an extent that it’s difficult to make and maintain friendships because I have no interest in anything else but that One Thing for however #long and won’t care about other things people try to get me into in order to have something in common with me or whatever or just. yeah. #issues. #she didn’t acknowledge the issues I have with low empathy or overstimulation. didn’t acknowledge my history of taking things literally to #such an extent that it has caused problems with people. didn’t acknowledge anything that was self-reported and not being displayed in that #moment right in front of her eyes. it’s just. really really disappointing and. yeah degrading honestly #especially because it took months upon MONTHS to get this fucking appointment #and to just be not listened to and dismissed. #anyway. yeah I’ve also just only ever had really shallow relationships with therapists (at best) #and have never felt helped by them or like they ever put in much effort to try to Get to me so to speak. only my psychiatrists have #been open minded and Listened to me. but they were always residents so they’d leave in a year or so. I don’t have one at this point. #kibumblabs

[hella1975]

happy eurovison!! do your stretches!!!

babe it's been days since i did my stretches at this point im too scared

#in my defence idk WHAT was going on with my sunday shift bc i only waitressed 7 hours and that's a pretty normal shift for me #like im aware compared to a normal person it would be very difficult to just out of nowhere expect them to be on their feet #walking back and forth the entire length of a restaurant regularly carrying heavy things all the while keeping up ABOVE AND BEYOND socially #for SEVEN ENTIRE HOURS with ZERO BREAK like masking that entire time on top of the 7 hour physical workout #like it's insane if u think about it for more than 2 seconds and im really trying to bc every time i falter i beat the shit out of myself #and like? NO? my job is actually very physically demanding and emotionally draining compared to most people's day-to-day activity #it's gonna have impacts sometimes! #so yeah long story short i finished my shift sunday and when i tell you my legs LOCKED UP in bed that night #like mainly my thighs but it was all in my hips and knees and it was so bad that i lay there until 2am before getting painkillers #bc i couldnt hack it #which is SAYING SOMETHING for me bc im normally both quite good with pain and also a hardass for taking painkillers #ive had that happen once before (again after waitressing lol) & never worried about it but my mum recently got diagnosed with arthritis #and ever since ive been like. Looking at my own joints any time they even HINT at playing up #like i am RENOWNED for inhereting all of my mum's medical shit from mental to physical like i KNOW i'll get it it's just a matter of when #and yeah that was sunday it's now tuesday and my thighs STILL feel bruised #and im like. embarassed about it bc it's not like i did anything spectacular? and idk why it's happening? #yeah idk hiiii rori did u like me ranting about my physical health in ur stretch reminder ask sorry do u still think im hot <3 #ask

[icewindandboringhorror]

‘being one of the only people in your entire area actually still taking the pandemic very seriously and following safety measures while every single person around you rapidly decides they completely no longer give a shit’ moodboard

#my bastard in hell i have fucking health conditions #maybe you want to gamble your shit but I simply cannot take those risks dude #and it is increasingly hard to interact with literally any other human being when it seems like we both live in alternate realities #AND if they won't even give the basic respect of just being careful around ME #just a basic 'okay I know we apparently disagree somehow but at least while you're around me could you take these precautions #to help protect me' then it's immediately just *deeply personal reason against it* *argument entirely based on how the person #feels and not any actual current data or pandemic statistics* *random personal anecdote* *reckless nihilism based in #reasonable and understandable exasperation but still missing the point and not ultimately practically helpful in terms of genuinely preventi #ng things from getting worse and simply worsening the conditions that foster the nihilism and exasperation in the first place* *ableism* #*the weirdest fucking argument you've ever heard in your life* *some other entirely personal sentimental reasoning* #*some argument that basically boils down to the fact that they don't trust or respect or care about you and your boundaries or health* #like gHHHGhhhhhhhhhh #JUST STAY AWAY FROM ME AND WEAR A MASK FOR 30 MINUTES whY does it have to be a debate WHY is that SOO hard #also people I know keep planning stuff and trying to force and guilt trip me and others in my household to go do stuff with them #and are like planning vacations and all this stupud bullshit and now I'm constantly having to put up with it and seem 'mean' or whatever #one of my roomates is fine but the other one is more emotionally volatile and definitely prone to being pulled in by being Lonely #or wanting to do stuff with loved ones and compromising on safety because they're being manipulated by the people around them #into feeling like they're being a burden by asking people to wear masks or etc. so its a constant trust issue where I have to just desparate #ly hoep that when left on their own they're ACTUALLY going to stand up for themselves and stick to their beliefs #and not just like come home and lie about following sfatey measures then secretly give me covid or something.. hhh... WHICH wouldnt be a pro #blem if EVERYONE on the earth wasnt just acting like the pandemic is over and deciding to be reckless - because then it's a matter of #social conformity and peer pressure and following the Culture instead of the data and even people who were safe before will see everyone aro #und them taking things less seriously and decide maybe now it's reasonable to do the same thing themselves or etc. etc. #and it's like... nothing with the VIRUS ITSELF changed lol.. the response changed and the culture changed but the part that matters is the #SAME....the virus isn't looking around like 'hey people seem more chill about this now - maybe I should just relax a little bit and not #infect people for a while. i really dont want to get in the way of their pool party summer vacation and all of that. i'll just step back' #HHHHHHHHHHHHH anyway.... oi am goin inshane lov........... #covid mention #covid tw

[toytulini]

thinking about masks again and i really should jist bite the bullet and buy some god damn reusable respirators to have. like 1 or 2. i have a couple particular ones in mind but. just. ugh. the logistics

#toy txt post #like my face isnt That Weird shaped to be like an actual problem but i feel like small jaw/chin + Big Nose + smallish head is like. #just slightly enough outside their Normal Person Head Shape to make masks tricky to fit? idk #can you bitches just give me a beak already ffs #anyway #thats more stressful w reusable respirators vs like. disposable ones that i already figured that shit out w #and im looking at. flo mask. i like the low profile shape and how discreet it is compared to the other reusable respirators #but someone i trust the Mask Quality Opinions of on twitter awhile ago pointed out that its a new company and theres a bit more of a risk of #them going out of business or smth and then you wont be able to buy more filters #vs brands like. 3m and dentec etc that are like. More Established(tm) ig? and like #common for industrial use? so like idk even if they went out of business tomorrow its like okay well theyre common enough someone will #prolly step in and make replacement filters still right? #idk #all things seem to have pros and cons #for one #the industrialness of dentec and 3m make their websites godawful to use and do not feel like i should be buying from them #like goddamn i feel like i need to be a contractor putting in an order for 100 of them to buy from them its Weird #hostile #also i think the person who said that on twitter was either. naomi wu @realsexycyborg or someone she retweeted or a bit of both #like she retweeted and then added her own thoughts. cred there #also saw someone who printed custom vinyl to decorate her reusable respirators and it looked cool as shit #but also like. that seems like it would make it even harder to clean? #guh. i should just. get one and try it. maybe itll seal better and have that magical perfect fit and not be That hard to clean

[poptartmochi]

i think that i will never be able to rid myself of Magdalena, despite my disdain for her source material, because she's just such a fun little inversion character 🤧

#not to say that im trying to actively get rid of her! but like.. i have bnha ocs that will probably never see the light of day again because #i dislike bnha 🕴️ and i dislike the reboot way more than i dislike bnha so You Would Think that maggie would have disappeared by now but #nauuur. the inversions will keep her in my brain forever babey 🍻 #it's something about the way gioia and vergil knew each other for such a short amount of time and were on completely different journeys but #still managed to Get each other.. the same hatness of it all. and from that we got nero who saved both their lives #meanwhile in nightmare reboot world‚ magdalena and vergil have known each other forever + run parallel to each other basically. and you #think that the whole time they're in lockstep that they get it! they get each other! they're in lockstep so they must be in sync! #but then it turns out the goal vergil has been obsessively dedicated to all along is actually Super Contradictory to the goal magdalena has #been obsessively dedicated to. and instead of their lives being saved by their connection‚ the sudden dissonance is the root of their #downfalls. that's like my own personal fuckin percolator man 🤧🤧 #it's fun that she and gioia are both driven by loss and the desire to mitigate it. they both live in these societies where you're constantly #watched and revealing your cards could spell out your doom. ignorance and guilt cause gioia to build up this marble facade of cold #nonchalance because she cannot engage in society Without revealing her cards yk. it hurts too much. so the poker face it is 🗿 #meanwhile magdalena Knows Too Much and the knowledge of it all eats away at her. she's boiling with the need to act‚ so a poker face could #never work for her. so she channels the energy into this larger-than-life persona to navigate through the world #and both of these methods work! gioia's facade makes people think she's cold or uninteresting so they ultimately disengage with her. #magdalena dazzles everyone and they're too distracted by the show to notice what she's doing behind the scenes. #but wearing the mask all the time takes a toll on both of them + ultimately leads to a loss of identity‚ where they only keep themselves #grounded by their secret work. gioia's run in with vergil helps her break free of this and reestablish herself #whereas magdalena's departure(s 😐) from vergil sets her down this path... it's just so 🌋🌋🌋 to me #also. it's fun to me that gioia was meant to become a demon but never did. meanwhile maggie detests demons but was forced to become one... #gioia dodged a bullet but it traveled through dimensions and shot her anyways lol 😭🤧 #there's something to be said about the flipped family dynamics between the two but ngl I'm still working on Maggie and Isaac's relationship #so. i will leave it alone for now 🕴️in the future though I hope that I can figure out how to make Isaac as relevant to Magdalena as #Benedictus is to Gioia 🤔 right now he's kind of a mystery variable 🙈 #sriracha.txt #long post #💃🏻

[drchucktingle]

my masks

hey there buckaroos. due to all of the attention the TEXAS LIBRARY ASSOCIATION situation has gotten i am going to take a minute to talk about my personal way as an autistic buckaroo. im going to tell you about my masks.

im doing this for a few reasons, some are good FUN reasons full of love and some are not so great. 

lets start with the GOOD STUFF. first of all, i am talking about this because speaking on my way can help other buckaroo feel more comfortable speaking on there own way, ESPECIALLY if they are good at ‘passing’ for neurotypical like chuck is. 

unfortunately the NOT SO GREAT reasons im talking about all this dang stuff are two fold. reason one: i have been put into a position of having to explain and justify my needs and boundaries by the TXLA. this is not something that i WANT to be taking up all of my time, but when large organizations do not make space for those who they have pledged to support, it puts us smaller buckaroos into position where were have to defend our existence. it is not plesent but it is necessary.

the second NOT SO GREAT reason is that ‘passing’ bisexual and autistic people like myself are ALWAYS just seconds from being gatekept from folks both outside and inside these communities. there will probably be a day on chucks deathbed where i take off my mask and say hello to this timeline (mostly so you can all see how handsome i am under here but I DIGRESS). i KNOW with absolute certainty (the same way other bi and autistic buckaroos are probably nodding along right now) that when that day comes i will STILL be accused of ‘not being real’ and ‘faking’ because i ‘dont look autistic’ and i have a beautiful ladybuck partner in sweet barbara.

ALL THAT IS TO SAY, i am taking a moment today to talk FOR THE RECORD about my neurodigence and my particular needs. hopefully i will not have to keep diving this deep every time an organization takes a discrimantory action against me, but i will also say this: at least it is a good fight on an important battlefield

anyway buds, here is the story of my way on the spectrum

when i was a young buckaroo i knew that my thought process was different. i could socialize easily, which is unique in contrast to many autistic buds (it is a spectrum after all), but my social ease was for an interesting reason. I ALWAYS KNEW WHAT OTHERS WERE ABOUT TO SAY. it was like a strange ‘human game’ where someone would say one thing and i would think ‘well you actually mean something else’ in a sort of logical way (this is why i later related to DATA from star trek so dang much). at first i remember thinking ‘well i am just NOT going to play along with this human game’. i quickly learned neurotypical buckaroos do not like this, that there is a BOB AND WEAVE to social interactions that must be learned. 

later i realized ‘actually if i WANT to make friends and prove love is real then i can do this like an expert because i can SEE the game where most cant’. this got chuck many buds and took me on many adventures. please understand, i am not saying these connections are not important to me, they are just different. they are full of love, but i express this in my own unique way.

HOWEVER, while growing up i felt disconnected from this timeline in other ways, like an alien or a reverse twin trotting along in a world that is not quite my own. i did not feel emotions the same way my buds did. they would get upset over the ‘human game’ interactions and i would not be moved at all, HOWEVER i could see the way sunlight hit a window and start crying my dang eyes out over the beauty. so my emotion was still there and VERY STRONG, i just felt it in more existential ways (like hearing the call of the lonesome train). these days that feeling has progressed to where i am pretty much in a constant blissed out state of cosmic emotional connection (make of that last sentence what you will, but it is the truth). when i make existential posts online i am not just FIRING OFF SOME CONTENT, i really mean every word. this is really my trot.

anyway as a young buckaroo these feelings made me worry sometimes. i thought about various mental health dianosises and marked the parts and pieces that matched with myself. am i this? am i that? sometimes, instead of just being’ different’ i worried i might actually be ‘wrong’. 

when i saw david byrne on letterman in my younger days i immediately recognized something connected to myself. i thought ‘wow this is the mystery being solved before my very eyes.’ i could hear it in the music of talking heads too. i started doing research and realized that i might be on autism spectrum, something that was later confirmed by a therapist (back then the diagnosis was called asperger's). it was a glorious and fulfilling moment. i was SO EXCITED TO BE AUTISTIC LIKE MY HERO. i felt very cool because of it, and i still feel very cool because of it.

one of the big reasons i talk so much about being autistic these days is because i want to make sure OTHER buckaroos can have that same moment that i did. they can see chuck and think ‘wow i really like this autistic artist, maybe being autistic is cool’

so what does an average day WITHOUT wearing the pink bag look like for me?

my thought process is exactly like ROSE from CAMP DAMASCUS, which is part of why i wrote the book. we have the same stim (complex order of finger taps), we prepare for social interactions the same way, we analyze things in the same logical trot that neurotypical people might think feels ‘detached’ but for me feels natural (certain reviews of camp damascus are very funny to me in this way. you can tell when a reader is just very confused by existing in an autistic brain for 250 pages.)

from the outside you would not be able to tell that i am on the spectrum. in fact you would probably find me very socially adept. 

the problem is, all of that masking can take its toll. i spent years trotting in and out the emergency room, talking to confused doctors who could not figure out the chronic phantom tension and pain that radiated through my body. i eventually accepted the fact that i would either live a life constantly on heavy painkillers or just stop living altogether.

eventually, however, i started noticing a correlation between the way that i felt, and the space that i allowed for chuck and the pink mask. i was exercising that tension, allowing my mental mask of neurotypical existence to take a rest. i started practicing physical therapy and this time THE RESULTS STUCK because i was approaching from two sides, MIND AND BODY. after a while, i got my pain down to about 5 percent of what it once was. i still have flare ups in times of stress, but the healing has been very real and life changing.

lets get VERY specific now. if i attended the TXLA confrence without a mask and gave my talk i can tell you this: i would do a dang good job. i can work the heck out of a crowd and (not to reveal too much about my secret way) I HAVE BEEN KNOWN TO DO THIS ON OCCASION VERY WELL. however, going home from this event i would very likely be in pain. i would likely need to do physical therapy. i would likely need to stim for a while. i would NOT be emotionally fullfilled in the same way. in other words, without my pink mask i can charm the heck out of buckaroos, but THE SPACE OF CHUCK TINGLE IS NOT THE SPACE FOR THAT. the pink bag is a place for me to not have to put up with that tension. it is a place for me to unmask mentally by masking physically.

this pink bag space SAVED MY LIFE and i am not going to risk blurring these lines. if and when that ever happens it will be MY decision, not someone elses. that is my boundary. the part of me that neurotypically masks could handle a library conference in a purely technical sense, but the part of me that chuck represents absolutely cannot and should not be asked to do that without the pink bag. unfortunately, the complexity of this point makes it even MORE difficult for me to think about and takes up even more of my time, because it forces me to START QUESTIONING MYSELF and my own needs. to be honest, that is the most insidious part of other people questioning your identify and refusing to accept your accommodation needs without ‘proof’.

the thing is, while all of this discussion of disability and accessibility is important, i have a much larger point to make by writing these words.

a conference should not uninvite someone with an unusual physical presentation or a strange way of speaking REGARDLESS of it being classified as a disability. it does not matter WHY i look the way that i look and wear what i wear. i should not have to spend all day writing this post instead of writing my next book, just because my sensibilities are unique and my presentation is unusual. 

fortunately the solution is very simple: let other people be themselves. its not hurting you to simply accept and nod at the buckaroos you think look strange. let us exist

#actually autistic #chuck tingle #tingleverse #buckaroo lifestyle

[angels-sins0]

Ghost x f!reader

Cw: smut, emotionally unavailable Simon, rough sex, age gap relationship (Simon is depicted in his late 30’s and the reader is around 21), older man!Ghost, young & naive!reader, unprotected sex, creampie

Ghost was a complex man.

You had never actually seen his face before, except for his lips and nose when he would lift up his mask to kiss you a couple times.

You had explicit instructions to only call him Ghost, never even bothering to tell you what his actual name was.

Ghost was a complete mystery to you, and it didn’t help that you were a young and curious girl.

You assumed he was in late 30’s, your best guess being that he was 37.

He had you on your back. Fucking into you so deep, his balls were slapping against you. Your legs were spread wide to accommodate him between them.

He didn’t talk much, only letting out the occasional groan when he hit that spot deep inside you.

“Ghost- feels so good…” You moaned and he didn’t acknowledge it, just kept pounding into your greedy pussy.

Ghost had his eyes closed, his face a few inches away from your own. You pulled him in for a kiss that left you breathless.

He let his head drop down to rest beside your neck when he pulled away, and your first instinct was to wrap your hands around him.

For a moment you let yourself believe that you were two lovers sharing an intimate moment with each other and you relished in the feeling it brought you.

Until that feeling subsided when he spoke in a cold tone. “You close?” He asked, no real emotion behind his voice.

“Yes.” You gasped when one of his hands wrapped around your leg, ultimately forcing you to loop both of them around him.

You were growing needier the closer you got to your release. “I wanna— fuck! Wanna see you.” You whimpered and moved one of your hands to grab at his mask in an attempt to pull it up.

He quickly stopped you, lifting his head up and roughly slapping your hand away, pinning both of your hands up in the process.

“Don’t ever fucking try that again. Understand?” Ghost scolded you, causing tears to finally fall from your eyes. All you could do was nod and look away, completely missing the way his eyes scanned your face for a few seconds.

Ghost grabbed your face and forced you to look at him. “Use your words.” He demanded.

“I understand.” You winced at his roughness. It’s like he had an inability to feel anything except for anger. You would sometimes feel so stupid for allowing him to be like this, allowing him to take that anger out on you.

He muttered out a quick “Good.” Before resuming his movements, tears still falling from your eyes even when he pressed his forehead against yours.

You came a couple of minutes after and Ghost followed shortly after you, emptying his load inside you and thrusting into you a few more times to make sure he doesn’t waste a drop.

Ghost lays still, his cock softening up inside your cunt.

“It’s Simon.” He says suddenly, his voice barely above a whisper. “What?” His words prompting you to stop crying.

He finally lifts his head up off of yours and slides out from inside you, getting out of his bed and going into the bathroom, completely disregarding what he just said.

You stayed in the bed for a few minutes, until he poked his head out to see if you were still there, letting out what you assumed was an annoyed sigh when he found you still in his room.

Ghost locked eyes with you for what felt like an eternity before you finally got the hint that he probably didn’t want you around by the time he got out.

You quickly got up and started getting dressed, taking a look at yourself in the mirror, and wiping away the tears from your eyes.

You felt so disgusting, for continuing to see him even when he had proved on multiple occasions that he wasn’t a good man, for letting him use you however he pleased.

He startled you when the bathroom door swung open. Ghost coming out in nothing but a towel wrapped loosely around his waist.

You looked at each other, internally grimacing at the deafening silence that had grown between you.

“I was just leaving, I’m sorry.” You weakly spoke, and he gave no response as he shuffled around his room to grab clean clothes.

He was still wearing his mask, almost like he was expecting to find you when he came out.

“Thank you for… for tonight.” You didn’t know why you said that but you just wanted to say anything in an attempt to get him to acknowledge you as a human being with feelings.

Ghost looked at you as he was sliding into his pants. He didn’t expect you to walk up to him and give him a hug.

You didn’t have the slightest clue as to why you were doing any of this and you couldn’t help the tears that escaped you.

He pulled you away, having not hugged you back. Your hands holding both of his arms. He looked down at you.

“It’s getting late.” Ghost spoke plainly. “Yeah…” You absolutely hated the silence that followed your words.

“Simon?” You said his real name for the very first time, your eyes lighting up slightly when he hummed.

“I’m sorry for doing that earlier. I don’t know what got into me.” You apologized. Simon stayed silent for a few moments, looking closely into your eyes.

“Okay.” He shrugged you off, barely acknowledging your words as he walked away. You took that as your sign to leave his house.

You finally walked out the door and you silently prayed the ground would swallow you up. You looked back once at the closed door before walking away with a heavy feeling in your heart.

#ghost x reader #simon riley smut #simon riley x reader #simon ghost riley #simon ghost x reader #simon riley x you #ghost smut #ghost x reader smut #ghost x y/n #ghost x you #ghost cod #ghost x reader angst