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#I appreciate the time you take to send me asks đŸ„°
rosicheeks · 1 year
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Merry Christmas, Rosie. You're wonderful, and I hope things look up for you. Sending lots of hugs your way.
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ahundredtimesover · 3 months
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I Want You to Stay (05) | JJK
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Pairing: Jungkook x (f.) Reader
Genre/Tags: boss!JK x assistant!reader; idiot strangers to lovers; slow slow burn; k-drama feels; angst, drama, fluff, smut
Chapter (Series) Warnings: foul/explicit language; alcohol consumption & passing out, unhealthy coping mechanisms; family drama; minor injuries; power dynamics (JK starts off as a jerk); work-related anxiety, feelings of helplessness, insecurities; childhood traumatic experiences, nightmares; sexual harassment, prior incidence of domestic violence (PLS PLS BE CAREFUL WHEN READING); arts and business/property devt talk that’s probably inaccurate; commitment issues & emotionally constipated characters; cold and detached JK; eventual explicit sexual content (specific warnings stated per chapter) (18+)
Chapter Word count: 14.8k
Series Masterlist
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Status: Ongoing
Series summary: Working for Jungkook isn’t the same as working for Hoseok. For starters, Jungkook doesn’t smile, he doesn’t appreciate you, and he gives you too much work. It doesn’t help that he’s incredibly handsome and has women at his beck and call. But as the tension grows, it becomes impossible to resist him. You’ve dedicated yourself to your job for 8 years so when you finally decide to put yourself first, he asks you to reconsider. And while you know that leaving is difficult, you learn that when it comes to Jungkook, staying is always so much harder.
PlaylistÂ đŸŽ¶: on the way home
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A/N: I deeply appreciate all the love and messages (and anticipation for uh, stuff) but again, it's a slow burn! Thank you so much! đŸ„°
And as always, my biggest thanks to @wonwoonlight  đŸ„°
PS. If I can’t tag you, pls fix your settings!
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Jungkook sits cross-legged on the couch in his office, his iPad in hand as he goes through the Board report for the nth time these past five days. 
Manager Lee and Chin-sun have put together the logistics, construction, and design departments’ reports with the VP’s and Jungkook is supposed to sign these off for submission to the CEO today, who then approves it for submission to the Board members. They have until Friday to review it in time for the meeting happening that same day. 
This consolidated report was finalized last Wednesday and Jungkook has been reviewing it everyday since then, including his presentation, making minimal comments and then taking notes on things he’s unfamiliar with. Granted, he’s reporting about the quarter when he’s only been Vice President for a month, which makes you incredibly instrumental in his preparations. As the executive assistant, you have the information that Jungkook needs from Hoseok’s time, and so you’ve also been spending everyday since Wednesday answering all of Jungkook’s questions. 
You don’t mind, really, as they’re details you know by heart. It also allows you to show him how involved and meticulous you were under Hoseok’s leadership, and Jungkook’s hums and mumbles of appreciation have helped you gain back the confidence that you lost. 
Even if your self-esteem decreased this past month because of the very person sitting in front of you, the fact that Jungkook’s been showing - in his own ways - his trust in you is enough to lift your spirits. He did admit last week that he needs you - something you hadn’t expected him to say - and you could tell it took so much from him to be able to verbalize it. But you suppose you needed that honesty, too; you needed to know that after all that frustration and anger during the first few weeks, there was that realization on his end that you have his back, and you’re just as capable as what everyone has been saying you are. 
“What information do you need from me, Mr. Jeon?” You finally ask. 
It’s been a good five minutes since Jungkook had asked for you and you’ve just been standing in front of him while he scrolls through the screen, perhaps giving another final look before he finally sends the document to his father.
“Nothing,” he sighs, rolling his head back and closing his eyes. “I just
 I just need someone to tell me to stop reviewing this report. I need this out of my sight but I can’t stop checking to make sure everything is okay.”
You look at him intently while he speaks. The tension in his entire face and body is visible, you can even feel it in the room. You feel for him, as he tries to hide the anxiety and desperation. You can tell that he just wants to do well so badly. With the amount of time he’s been spending just going through this, his perfectionist tendency surfaces, and you’re at least thankful that it hasn’t turned him back into an asshole. At least not yet. 
“You need to stop reviewing the report, Mr. Jeon, and let it go,” you say as instructed but with sincerity in your words. “You’ve been on this for days. Manager Lee and Chin-sun have reviewed it, and so have I. CEO Jeon could still suggest changes and we won’t know them until he’s reviewed it, but we at least have the details ironed out. If I may suggest, you can send the file to him in the next hour so you can now focus on practicing for your presentation. That may be a better use of your time.”
Jungkook opens his eyes and turns to you. There’s assurance in your words and your voice and like what he told himself he’d do, he’ll trust you and the team. He’s seen how hard everyone has been working for this - Manager Lee and Chin-sun have done so well in consolidating and cross-checking everything; Do-hyun’s presentation is simple yet effective, and Yohan, who’s back from the hospital, has been adding in all the needed details. And there’s you, making sure that everything and everyone is on track, even as you prepare for Jungkook’s upcoming events. 
“Okay, then,” he exhales deeply. “I’ll send it in the next half hour.”
Knowing he has a meeting set at 2PM, you ask him if you should order him lunch.
“Yes please,” he answers, saying he wants some braised beef from the restaurant on the next block. “Order for yourself as well, and the rest of the team. You can all get anything you want.”
The silence prompts Jungkook to look at you, and he’s met with a questioning gaze.
“Is there a problem?” He asks.
“N—no,” you answer. “I’d like to confirm again that I’ll be ordering lunch for you and all five of us.”
“Yes, Ms. Cho. That’s what I said.”
You remain unmoving as you wait for him to correct himself. This is the first time that Jungkook has offered to treat the team to a meal. Not that you’ve been waiting for it, but Hoseok took you all out to dinner on his first day as a welcome and a thanks in advance, and once you picked up that Jungkook wasn’t the type to engage with his staff much, you just didn’t expect anything. So takeaway lunch from a nice restaurant is definitely surprising. 
“Okay, sir,” you say. “I will do that. I’m sure the team will appreciate it.”
Jungkook merely hums, his eyes focused on the screen now as you bow and head out. 
You go meet the team and as you expected, everyone looks at you in shock. 
“Did the real Mr. Jeon get abducted?” Do-hyun asks. “Because treating us is something he wouldn’t do.”
“Yah! It may be a month late but let’s just be thankful, okay?” You frown at her. “He can see that everyone’s been working hard and I’m sure he appreciates that, and he may not be able to say it but he can at least show us.”
“While he’s at it, he can maybe at least say thank you or you know, smile every once in a while,” Chin-sun sighs. 
“We’ll get there. He knows he needs to do better and he will, I’ll make sure of that,” you assure them, thinking about the conversation from last week. 
Jungkook wants you to help him and for his sake and everyone else’s, you’ll make sure that you do. 
“Well, is he better to you?” Do-hyun asks, her face in a pout because she’s seen you skip meals several times and even cry, and she’d wanted so many times to just hug you, but she knows it’s not something you openly receive. 
“Yes,” you say, knowing it will drive your point. “I’d like to think that the worst is over and I can just focus on doing better and helping him. It would be great if the rest of us could do the same.”
“She’s right,” Manager Lee chimes in. “We grow when we adapt, and much more when we’re able to move on and learn from our experiences. It hasn’t been the best month but it’s also just been a month. So let’s be grateful for the meal and just continue with the good work we’ve been doing, okay?”
You give them the warmest smile you can muster, hoping this would be enough. 
It seems to be, as they all excitedly give their orders, which you and Yohan pick up from the restaurant. You return and after giving Jungkook his food, you head to the other room to eat as well.
The team enjoys the meal, with Do-hyun dramatically stating that it’s the best beef brisket she’s ever had. And you agree; there’s a reason why Jungkook gets this every week. 
Jungkook can hear laughter and satisfied hums from the support team office, with Do-hyun, he supposes, claiming that it feels like Christmas. Yohan says it’s a much-needed post-recovery treat, and even Manager Lee - who’s often serious - cracks a few jokes. Jungkook can pick out your sound, too, noting the joy that emanates from it. He allows himself a small smile, knowing that given how he’s been to everyone this past month, he at least could give his team this highlight of their day. 
He stands by the door, initially going unnoticed, until Chin-sun catches sight of him and alerts everyone that he’s there. The room goes silent, and Jungkook looks on as his staff quietly munch their food and bow to him in greeting. The teasing and laughter have gone; worried eyes are what he sees instead. 
Your initial surprise at seeing him melts away. He rarely drops by for anything, even for a greeting or to just check up on the team, unlike Hoseok who liked to come here often to de-stress after long meetings. But you sense Jungkook’s awkwardness at the silence, with his hands in his pockets and his blank gaze, so you smile at him and hope that eases the tension a bit.
“Lunch was great, Mr. Jeon,” you say. “Thank you.”
“It was,” Manager Lee pipes in. “The roast pork was so delicious. The potato salad was very good, too.”
You look at the others and encourage them to say something as well, and they hum in agreement and say their thanks.
“The beef brisket was heavenly,” Do-hyun raves. “Thank you! I hope it’s not the last time.”
She awkwardly chuckles, realizing that her boss isn’t one she should be joking with, but Jungkook doesn’t seem to take offense, as he purses his lips - perhaps to hide a smile, revealing a tiny dimple that catches you off guard. 
“It won’t be. And uh, it was a month late, so I’m glad you all enjoyed it,” he replies, a tinge of disappointment now painting his face.
There’s another moment of silence and you observe him, hands still in his pockets, looking around awkwardly, unable to meet anyone’s eyes. 
“It’s greatly appreciated, sir,” you assure him once more. “We hope you had a good lunch as well.”
“I’m just about to have it, actually,” he says. “I sent the report to the CEO and he must’ve been waiting for it because he read it right away and called to give feedback.”
“Oh? How did CEO Jeon find it?” Manager Lee asks.
“He said it was good. There are just minor things he asked me to change but I can do them on my own,” Jungkook answers. “I appreciate everyone’s hard work. Now, we can focus on our upcoming events and the Arts Center.”
The team immediately starts packing and swallowing their food, and Jungkook has to stop them. 
“Not right now,” he clarifies. “Continue with your meal. And don’t stay too late. We’ve got another busy week ahead.”
“Yes, Mr. Jeon,” everyone says in unison.
Jungkook nods and starts walking away, leaving all five of you with confused looks, as Jungkook has never spoken to the team in such a calm and friendly manner. It was always firm and professional, low and stoic. 
You scurry out the room and follow him. Jungkook gives you a questioning look when you enter his office shortly after he does, and you pick up his untouched lunch from the table and inform him that you’ll heat it up, knowing he doesn’t like to eat his food cold. 
You go back to the pantry then return to Jungkook’s room, his beef brisket dish now properly placed in a bowl. He gives you a nod, his form of acknowledgment and thanks, you suppose, and you ask the question you’ve had since his earlier stop at the team’s office.
“Are the edits really just minor?” You wonder, knowing that CEO Jeon is meticulous and quite particular with these board reports. 
Jungkook takes a moment to respond. He should know that you’ve done this a few times and are probably used to how his father is already, which means you’d see right through him as well. 
“Well, they’re not major,” Jungkook says. “I mean, they’re not trivial corrections. The details are all good but I need to change some terminologies and framing and some construction of the sections based on the Board’s current concerns, especially about the Arts Center. They’re not that substantial but it’ll still take me an hour or so.”
“Why did you tell the team that they were minor, then?”
“So they won’t offer to help.”
“But they would. I would,” you tell him. “It’s our job.”
“I was going to ask, but it’s your break time. Everyone was enjoying their meals and each other. First time I’ve seen that, actually. I know it doesn’t happen when I’m around.”
“It’s just that you’re not—”
“Hoseok,” he finishes for you.
“Not someone they’re comfortable being themselves around,” you correct him.
“Yes, not like Hoseok,” he pushes.
“You said it the first day, Mr. Jeon. You do things very differently from your cousin. Your personalities are very different, too. We had him for three years and for Yohan and Do-hyun, he was their first boss,” you explain. “They’re just not used to you yet.”
“What about you? Are you used to me by now?”
There’s sudden tension in the room as he looks at you with the desire for honesty, and it’s what you give.
“I’m not quite sure.”
Jungkook doesn’t really know what he expected, as the question just slipped past his mouth before he could pull it back, so he just nods and proceeds to take his late lunch, wanting to forget that he’d asked at all.
You take this as a signal to head out, which you do, before reminding him that he can ask you for help if he needs another pair of eyes before he submits his part again. Jungkook just nods once more, and it’s later in the day, after the third cup of coffee that you take to his room, that he says his father’s already approved the version he sent after you went through it upon his request. You know that’s just half of what he needs to do though, as he’ll still need to present it to the Board this coming Friday. 
“You may go home, Ms. Cho,” he says after he signs some documents for you. 
“How about you, Mr. Jeon?” You ask. 
It’s been a long day, an extension of an even longer weekend because he’d been at a work event and then reviewed the report as well. 
“I’ll probably stay back and go over the presentation. Maybe practice a little.”
You purse your lips, holding something back.
“Should I not?” He wonders.
“Just thinking that it might be better for you to take a proper rest tonight,” you advise. 
“I’ll think about it. It’s gonna be a tough one on Friday and I want to be prepared.”
“I understand,” you smile. “I’ll go ahead, Mr. Jeon.”
Jungkook holds your gaze for a while before he nods and returns to his screen, going through the presentation slides and the notes he scribbled on his iPad. But try as he might, the graphs and the words just go over his head. 
He does need to rest, he thinks. He hasn’t really taken a break all weekend. His hookup from last night was the only relief he got, but that was to expend all the negative energy from the anxiety and stress, and he realizes that he probably doesn’t know what proper rest is, like what you suggested he have. He wonders if you’ve ever had one, or if it’s something you stopped having ever since you started working for him.
Taking your advice, he heads out. It’s only been 30 minutes and he assumes you’re already on the bus and on the way home. He sits in the passenger seat, letting Mr. Ri’s choice of music fill the car as Jungkook’s mind wanders to you - how you laughed at the team’s antics, how you got them to assure him, how you read him well, how you were patient and helpful, and how you seemed concerned about how tired he’s been. 
He’ll chalk it up to you doing your job and helping him as he asked you to do; he always will. He can’t ever think that any of your actions mean more even if deep down, he wishes they do, only so he knows that you don’t hate him, that you’ve forgiven him for things he never apologized for, that you’ll stay for as long as possible. There’s something about your honesty and calm presence that stabilizes him, that makes him take a pause. 
Jungkook’s worked hard on his career for the past decade and it’s all he focuses on; it’s all he thinks about. But when you’re there, he’s forced to stop and think about you. He’s noticed that just this past week - when you’re around, he listens; when you’re close to him, he breathes. Ironic, really, considering that every time you close the distance - when you fix his tie or look at his screen over his shoulder or help him retrieve portfolios - he remains still, his heart stopping and his throat drying up, afraid to take in your scent or to know just how fast his pulse would race or what words he’d say that he won’t be able to contain. 
He’s afraid to know you, only because what he’ll learn might make him want you. And Jungkook knows that he can’t let himself feel that about you in any way.
He sighs as he looks out the window - cars in line to cross the intersection, people walking to their destination. He thinks he’s hallucinating as he sees your smile, but a bus blocks his view and Mr. Ri steps on the gas. 
Outside, you smile to yourself as you wait in line. You were held up at the lobby because Bitna caught you in the elevator and didn’t want to let you go just yet, so you left the office just minutes ago and were waiting at the bus stop when a familiar car showed up and you saw Jungkook looking out the window. He opted to leave early, too; you can only hope he’ll take your advice and rest tonight. 
But the thought that what you said prompted him to take a pause from work stirs something within. Maybe it’s because he’s finally listening to you, or that it seems like he trusts you now. Whatever it is, for as long as it makes your job bearable, you’re all for it. 
It doesn’t take away from the moments you’ve shared where it seems like the world stops for a bit as you hold each other’s gazes for the shortest of seconds. There’s tension where there shouldn’t be, and there’s something different in his eyes when there used to be disdain, one which you can’t read nor identify. It leaves you still for the briefest of moments, unguarded and a little bare, as he seems to tell you something with just a look and you just don’t know what it is. 
As you find a rare seat in the bus, you let the musings go. Jungkook is a man who holds in him a million thoughts a day and those moments with you seem to be his only reprieve; perhaps they’re also just instances of temporary lags or the rare silence and stoppage of everything. In some odd way, it allows you to see him as the human that he is - exhausted, unsure at times, but seemingly yearning for something. 
There’s always an emotion or a thought or a word that he holds in, and you can only wish - as your relationship with him improves - that whatever it is he’s holding back, he’ll find a way to express it. 
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“Do you have any advice for the Board meeting?”
Jungkook slides the question in before Hoseok heads to the elevator and off to an event. They’ve just finished having a check-in with CEO Jeon, who wanted to make sure that the two of them are well-prepared for this Friday, given that presenting during these meetings and contributing to policy and strategy are crucial in their roles as President and Vice President. Jungkook won’t admit that it caused him a bit of anxiety, but he’ll surely take the chance to ask his cousin for tips on how to make sure that he doesn’t screw up.
“I do,” Hoseok answers as he holds off on pressing the button. “Ask your assistant. And then listen to what she says.”
Jungkook visibly sighs. “Hoseok, I mean it.”
“I mean it, too,” the older man replies. “If it’s anything about our strategic plan or policies, just take my lead. And it’s your very first so you’re expected to still be adjusting. If it’s about the presentation, let ___ brief you about it. She’s been with me every single time I had to present. When I was focused on what I had to say, she was focused on how the Board was reacting and how those translated to the questions they eventually asked. She’d know what you’ll need to emphasize on or who you need to be wary of.”
There’s an unsure look in Jungkook’s eyes, and Hoseok knows it isn’t about trusting you. It’s about him.
“You’re scared, aren’t you?” Hoseok asks. “What are you afraid of, Kook?”
“You know what they think of me,” Jungkook sighs. “I don’t want to screw up and give them more reasons to doubt me because they already do. And they’re definitely gonna ask about the Arts Center. What if they bring up my disappointing social skills? I don’t wanna end up feeling inadequate and embarrassing father.”
“Keep thinking that way and you will,” Hoseok huffs. “Look. Our family owns the company. You and I were trained to run it after my sister and your brother decided they didn’t want to. The Board knows this. They’ll either stay in our good graces or plot against us. Your father knows that, too, and that’s why he’s being hard on both of us because he knows what we’ll have to face. That also just means he’ll always be on your side. He’ll always be on ours. The Board could be intimidating but we still hold the power. They’ll impose or question or cast doubt because they want to feel that sense of control. It’ll only affect you if you let them.”
“Okay” is all that Jungkook manages to say, a tinge of resignation on his face as he takes in his cousin’s words.
“You’ve managed worse people than them,” Hoseok assured him. “Just focus, stand by your project, and engage them. Simple as that.”
“Yes, it’s very simple,” Jungkook chuckles with a shake of his head.
“Like I said, your assistant’s there for a reason, Kook. This is when I get to tell you that it’s her job. We would prepare together and debrief right after, and it always helped because she fills in gaps and informs me of things I missed. Trust me. Trust her.”
The thing is, Jungkook does; he doesn’t need to be reminded that he should trust you because he’s learned to do that, despite it seemingly impossible given that you both started off on the wrong foot. It’s the thought of spending more time with you, during a time when he’s still trying to get used to you and how you affect him, that makes him worried about this. But it’s not something he can talk about with Hoseok. It’s not something he can talk about with anyone. 
“Fine,” Jungkook finally says. “I’ll talk to her.”
“Good. I’ll go now. Have dinner at home tomorrow, okay? And I’ll see you when I get back.”
Jungkook waves the older man goodbye and then returns to his office, where he finds you dropping some files off for signing. 
“Payment requests for the event,” you explain, earning you a nod from him as he walks to his seat. “How did the meeting with your father go, Mr. Jeon?”
“As I expected,” he huffs. “A bit of encouragement, more of the pressure. He’d slide in reminders of what the Board thinks of me and how I should present myself.”
“Is the pressure helping?” You ask.
“A little,” he sighs, sinking into his chair and exhaling deeply. He rolls his head back and closes his eyes, allowing himself a few seconds of peace. “But I still need help. Hoseok said I can get it from you.”
“You know, he oversells me sometimes,” you manage to laugh, prompting Jungkook to look at you now. “I know I’m competent. But I don’t know about being your source of help for a Board meeting any more than providing you with data.” Jungkook likes to do things on his own after all, you think to yourself.
“But you’ve been to as many Board meetings as he has.”
“Yes, but only for his presentation.”
“And that’s what I need help with,” he says. “I just need direction, I guess. Or affirmation that how I’m doing it is the right way. Or tips on who to woo or who to not take seriously.”
Jungkook has been to a few Board meetings but he’s never had to present anything. He’s also never had to engage with the members so he didn’t pay much attention to them because he didn’t feel the need to. These appointments were all a few years too early, and while he’d had a critical position in the Southeast Asian headquarters, everything had gone through his uncle who headed the office then. 
This is the first time that Jungkook feels the magnitude of all his decisions, and that every move he makes is being assessed. And even with his father and Hoseok giving him guidance, they have their own teams to manage and an entire company to run, just like him. Somehow, with all the people around him, Jungkook still feels alone. 
You, with your perpetual presence and surprising warmth, are the only one who makes him feel otherwise. And it terrifies him more than anything.
“Well, I’ve picked up a few things along the way,” you hum. “I can maybe go through my notes and share them with you.”
“Good. I’d like to do that over lunch, since I’ll have you and Manager Lee watch me practice the presentation around 2.”
Jungkook picks up the slight fall of your face. “Is that a problem?” He asks. “Did you have lunch plans?”
“Nothing more important than assisting you, Mr. Jeon,” you say, a change of expression indicating that you indeed had prior commitments that you’re putting off because of him. “I’ll inform Manager Lee about meeting with him after.”
You head out and return to your desk to work on your remaining tasks for the morning until lunch time rolls by and you accompany Jungkook to a nearby restaurant as he’d asked. You try not to get too excited about the meal in front of you and then control yourself from letting out orgasmic sounds from the succulent piece of salmon that’s melting in your mouth. This check-in seems too important for Jungkook and you want to support him in any way you can.
“How was Hoseok during his first Board meeting?” Jungkook starts. 
“Nervous, a little rattled. His sister left him behind with a lot of work and she was abroad for most of the time so they weren’t able to meet up,” you share. “But he got up there and presented all the office’s gains for the past months and then explained his plans moving forward. He had all these good ideas on policy and strategy and he articulated them well. He had to take over multiple small projects and he showed how he planned to manage all of them. His charms sort of hid away the anxiety he was feeling and I guess that eventually helped him get rid of it.”
“Well, that’s one thing I can’t claim that I have,” Jungkook sighs. 
He looks at you to see your reaction, and the awkwardness on your face makes him internally laugh.
“I can lie to you if you want me to,” you say, and he chuckles, surprising you both, though he acts like he doesn’t mind.
“I’d actually want you to be as honest with me as possible, Ms. Cho. I don’t want you, of all people, to suck up to me to get on my good graces.”
“Great, since I wasn’t on it in the first place,” you trail, earning you another laugh, and you wish this could at least lessen the pressure he’s putting himself under. 
“That’s true,” he says, holding your gaze. He turns to his food before he gets sucked in your gorgeous eyes even more. “But I mean it. I don’t exactly know how to charm people, much less the Board. I don’t want to add to the narrative they already have of me having terrible social skills. But I also don’t want them to think I’m being fake or pretentious.”
“If I may, you’ll botch that aspect if you keep thinking about it,” you advise. “Perhaps you can just focus on what you’re good at. Delivering a presentation, regardless of what it’s about, is a skill. You have all the information and I can add some more if you’re not confident with them. You also tweaked some existing processes and you can build on it. But also, the Arts Center will definitely be their focus, so talk about it the way you would with your father and the team
 and me. You let us envision it with your words and your visuals and those are all you need.”
“Okay then. I’ll just imagine they’re all vegetables or something so I can focus.”
“Mrs. Doi likes making eye contact because she wants to feel like you’re conversing with her,” you say. “Mrs. Seo asks a lot of irrelevant questions but you have to answer as if they’re important. Mr. Ong likes being acknowledged every time he says something or even nods. So I don’t recommend acting as if they’re inanimate. Maybe just with Mr. Wang because he falls asleep in everything, but don’t take it personally. I think it’s a medical condition.”
Jungkook’s amused look encourages you to continue.
“Mr. Mun doesn’t really get design and building terms so you’d have to explain them at least twice. Mr. Bong tends to act all mighty but he doesn’t really know much. Same with Mr. Im and Ms. Hwa. The rest are fine,” you say. “Mr. Saito is very thoughtful. He’s a designer so his insights would be good. Ms. Cheng is unproblematic and overall just supportive. Mr. Yeon is just
 there. They’re quite intense when it comes to profits and the company’s image but if you stand by what you know, they won’t really say much.”
“Wow, that’s
 that’s a lot to take in. And also very informative,” Jungkook states. “I never noticed any of those.”
“Well, you had your reasons to be in those meetings and maybe you didn’t have a reason to pay attention to them,” you shrug. “I do. I thought it was an added way that I could help Mr. Jung. Assistants are asked to sit on the side of the room so we can be easily signaled for anything and I thought I could use that position to observe the Board members and see how they respond to the presentation. It helped for the succeeding ones and it took the pressure off him in terms of needing to appease them.”
“Makes sense,” Jungkook hums. “Worrying about how they’ll react or what they’ll say is half of the pressure.”
“It is. I couldn’t help Mr. Jung for his first time because it was mine, too, but he picked things up quite easily. He knew who to pay attention to.”
“Well, considering that I don’t seem to be ideal for this relationship-heavy position, I’ll have to pay attention and appease all of them, it seems.”
“If I may, Mr. Jeon, you can take it as a challenge,” you advise, feeling more comfortable in being honest now. “I may be just a humble assistant but I’ve seen things. With all the praises for Mr. Jung - which are deserved, of course - I’ve witnessed his moments of distress, which is perfectly normal for anyone. A-yeong had to remind him of how good he was everyday because he needed that push and it helped him. It also helped that he was trying to prove something and that he was always told that he had all the qualities to do that.”
“Not everyone has a supportive wife like him though. Or like my father,” Jungkook laughs dryly.
“They had supportive assistants,” you offer, trying to be optimistic. “I had to fill-in as Mr. Jung’s sounding board and I was always in awe at his approach to things.”
“Which is very different from mine, I know,” Jungkook says unintentionally, the sigh making you feel like he’s tired of the comparison, and you feel a bit bad at having to seemingly remind him of that.
“And which isn’t bad at all,” you try to assure him. “Just because it’s different, doesn’t mean it’s not right.”
Well, it wasn’t right to treat you the way I did, he wants to say, but the words stay in his head and at the tip of his tongue. 
“That’s
 comforting,” he says instead.
“I was trying to be assuring but comforting is fine, too,” you chuckle. “But I mean it, sir. I know there are all these expectations and I won’t be able to truly understand what the pressure is like but if you allow it to challenge you, you might even surprise yourself. And then you’ll end up surprising them, too. But do it for you. At the end of the day, they’re just the Board but you’re the Vice President. And you’re you. You’re all you can control.”
There’s a beat of silence as Jungkook takes in everything you’d said. You have this persistence about you that’s reflected in the way you carry yourself and in the way you relate with others, especially towards him despite how he’d treated you not long ago. Regardless of what you said, he thinks you know exactly what he feels when it comes to dealing with pressure. He supposes that working for his family can do that to someone, especially when it’s him. 
“Such moving words, Ms. Cho,” he finally says.  
“I didn’t mean to give unwanted advice,” you shake your head in disappointment. 
“I needed it though,” he surprises you. “Other than Hoseok or even Yoongi, who are both busy themselves, I only have you as a sounding board. And as support. So, uh, thanks.”
He says his gratitude with a soft tone, almost embarrassingly. You can tell it’s something he doesn’t say that often, but you take it, as you think it’s another step towards him trusting you even more. And you need that trust for now; it’s this peaceful and honest dynamic with him that’s making your job bearable.
Lunch continues with Jungkook asking more questions about some of the Board members and you dishing some dirt on some of them as what you’ve heard in the office washrooms, perhaps the only gossip you don’t take with a grain of salt. He’s amused, and you think this is the most expressive you’ve seen him. 
You proceed to meet with Manager Lee in the conference room where Jungkook goes through each slide presentation, asking both of you for more information he thinks he needs and about how he’s carrying himself, his tone, his pace, and his engagement. It’s good enough for a first run-through, Manager Lee says, and Jungkook decides to dry-run it again on Thursday. 
The rest of your day goes by a little stressfully. There are multiple events that you have to organize and coordinate with other offices, and those are what you work on until you clock out on time.
Jungkook stays behind for only half an hour before deciding he’s had enough of looking through his notes and will return to them tomorrow. He takes the elevator and nods when Yoongi enters.
“Hey,” Jungkook greets. “How are the designs for the Changwon mid-rise?”
“It’s 6:00. I don’t wanna talk about work,” Yoongi whines. 
Jungkook knows this. It’s also why he likes to tease his friend about it. 
“Fine. We can just stand next to each other awkwardly until we have to get off,” Jungkook says.
“Hmm,” Yoongi hums. “Or, we can talk about how my lunch plans changed because someone asked my lunch partner for a meeting.”
The tension immediately rises and Jungkook hates how affected he is by Yoongi’s teasing. 
“Ah, so it was you. Well, she did say it wasn’t as important as what we were meeting about,” Jungkook hits back.
“True. It’s about the Board meeting after all. It’s a pretty big deal.”
Jungkook starts to feel hot all over, as the thought of you and Yoongi conversing about your thwarted lunch plans because of him plays in his head. It’s a mix of frustration and disappointment. While the meeting was in no way confidential, he just hates the idea that it was something you shared with Yoongi. Perhaps it’s just after the fact, considering that Jungkook thinks it was a good lunch. You clearly enjoyed the dish - he could see how you tried to control your reactions to it - and your conversations went by smoothly. You were honest and supportive; he was open and all the more surprised with how well you were able to calm him down. It’s as if someone else was privy to that moment you both shared, even if Yoongi wasn’t there. 
“Huh, I thought you were over her,” Jungkook says, the bitterness slicing through. If his friend picks it up, he doesn’t say anything.
“I am. We were just gonna have lunch at this noodle house because she was craving it,” Yoongi clarifies. “I told you, I’m her only friend here. It’s nice to share a meal with someone who cares about you every once in a while, you know? It’s hard being a working adult and we all need a bit of a break and a companion sometimes. It didn’t mean anything more than that.”
Jungkook chooses not to respond and Yoongi could tell why. There’s this look of annoyance painting the younger man’s face, which makes him a lot more transparent than he wishes he was. 
But Yoongi can see right through his friend. It’s not something he raises though, but he won’t be surprised if Jungkook dwells on this. He just hopes it isn’t to your detriment again.
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The ride home wasn’t as terrible last night, and after your elder neighbor gave you some stew because she cooked too much, you had a satisfying dinner and an even more satisfying slumber. 
You feel like the end of the week isn’t too far ahead - although there really isn’t anything exciting for you except for a date with your bed - and you just want to get through all your tasks for the day and get that jjajangmyeon that Yoongi said he’ll get for you today so you can eat it for dinner. You were initially upset at having to pass up on him for yesterday’s lunch, but you’d be the first to admit that sharing that meal with Jungkook was still worthwhile.
Not only was the dish you ordered one of the best things you’ve ever eaten, it was also nice to see Jungkook loosen up a bit after feeling tense all morning because of his presentation. You liked that he’s being open to getting support from you, as it seems that he sees you now as more than just the assistant who’s there to serve him. He seems to appreciate your thoughts and didn’t even act bitterly when you gave him unsolicited advice. You feel even more that your relationship improves daily.
That is, until you enter his penthouse this Wednesday morning with barely a look of acknowledgement from him. Going through your routine, he doesn’t say much; he stays silent the entire ride to the office as well.
When you enter his room to serve his coffee, his furrowed brows have returned and his jaws are clenched as he types away on his desktop.
“Ms. Cho,” he calls out, his voice stern once again. 
You turn around to face him, wondering what has happened since you left the office yesterday.
“Yes, Mr. Jeon?”
“I just wanted to raise that while I understand you have personal relationships with other employees, I do not appreciate you divulging the topics of our meetings with them. Even if they’re my friend as well.”
His last sentence gives away who he’s talking about, and the conversation with Yoongi after you canceled your lunch plans with him rings in your head. 
It was a harmless statement, you want to say; you didn’t share any more than it being a meeting about his presentation. There was no ill-intent in you telling Yoongi why you couldn’t see him for lunch. But you choose to pass up on reasoning with Jungkook. He builds his wall up even more when you do, and you don’t want things to be that way again, not when they seemed to be going okay already these past few days.
So you nod and concede. “I understand, Mr. Jeon, and I apologize. I won’t do it again.”
Jungkook can’t help but just look at you, internally smacking himself as your face falls further and as you, once again, feel far away because of his own stupidity. 
“Is there anything else you need, sir?” 
He shakes his head no, and you bow in response, heading out, with the sadness in your eyes as the last thing he sees. 
Jungkook is unable to focus on his emails and the conference call he takes part in. The words and thoughts are all jumbled when he practices his presentation, as his gaze constantly flits to your spot just outside where you sit, doing your tasks while looking detached and dejected. 
He assumes you didn’t come to work expecting to be called out the way he did with you, which in hindsight, didn’t seem necessary, especially knowing how it’s affecting you right now. Things were going well between both of you after all - he’s being more open and you’re being more comfortable. Information was flowing smoothly, and communication has improved. And he just went ahead and screwed all that up.
Jungkook starts to feel stuffy. He’s been in his office working on things for the Arts Center and practicing most of the day, with you only coming in to bring the lunch he’d asked Mr. Ri to buy and his cups of coffee. You’ve avoided his gaze and haven't said much to him, too. 
He decides to take a walk outside. The outdoor space on this floor has nice benches and a small garden that overlooks the Han River. He’s seen the team eat there sometimes, and while the weather may be a little too hot for it, he’d much rather breathe in the air than his humidifier. 
But as he takes his time to open the door, he hears a familiar voice from outside.
“Fine, if you won’t take the sandwich, at least take the noodles,” Yoongi says. “You’ve been craving that all weekend.”
“Not anymore,” you huff, seemingly annoyed.
“Hey, did I do something wrong?” Yoongi asks, calm and understanding in tone, traits that Jungkook could only hope to have. 
“No
 I don’t know,” you sigh. “Just that, whatever I talk to you about or mention, other people don’t need to know them, okay? No matter how harmless they are. Let’s just
 not talk about work stuff. Especially in the office. That’s it.”
“Ah, so that’s what this is about.”
“What do you—”
“Mr. Min,” Jungkook calls out, fully opening the door now. “I have design guidelines I need you to go over. I need them by tomorrow morning.”
“Okay, Jungkook,” Yoongi bitterly replies, knowing what’s happened. “Just send them over to me.”
“Ms. Cho will do that right now.”
You nod in acknowledgement of Jungkook’s instruction and remain focused on your desktop. There’s silence in the air and tension that you can’t deal with right now.
“Can I help you with anything else, Mr. Min?” 
“Nah. If I do, I’ll check with your boss first if I can ask you for it. Don’t want you getting in trouble because of me.”
You finally look up at him, a tinge of annoyance painting his face, a rarity since Yoongi doesn’t seem to ever be irate about anything. 
“And I’ll just take this jjajangmyeon if you don’t want it,” he adds, taking the container that’s on the ledge of your desk with him, before walking out of your area.
You can’t help the pout that forms on your lips. You really love that noodle house’s version and you’ve been craving it for days. It’s where you and Yoongi were both supposed to have lunch yesterday but Jungkook spoiled it, and it wouldn’t have mattered as much, until it became a reason for him to be upset with you again. You’re not exactly sure why, but much as you want to question your boss this time, you don’t have the energy for it. It doesn’t seem worth it, but it also doesn’t change the fact that Yoongi might have said something to Jungkook, and that’s a dynamic you’re still unsure how to read or deal with. 
Your gaze shifts to the man himself, who looks less annoyed than he did at the start of the day. You don’t know how his practice has been going, since he hasn’t asked you to run it with him, but you suppose he’s doing alright. He’s been in his room all day doing that and taking calls in between. 
Jungkook looks away and heads out. He lets the summer air clear his mind a little before he goes back inside. It’s 6PM by the time he emerges from his room, surprised at seeing your face still buried in piles of papers.
“Ms. Cho, I’ll be heading to Hoseok’s for dinner,” he says, getting your attention. “Anything that needs my signature or approval can wait tomorrow.”
He hopes you’ll read through his words, as he wishes you’d take a rest yourself, like you advise him to do.
“Finance needs your expense reports first thing tomorrow morning, Mr. Jeon,” you say, a little too stoic than he’s used to. “These can be signed tomorrow when you arrive.”
Jungkook just nods, knowing there’s not much he can do if you don’t want to go home yet. But he does leave you with a reminder.
“Ms. Cho,” he says before leaving. He’s met with curious eyes that he tries not to fall into. “Make sure to eat a proper dinner.”
He walks out too quickly, not wanting to see your reaction.
You’re too tired to react, but that just pushes you to finish all your work and head to the pantry for some biscuits. It’s then that you see the paper bag with a note on it. 
For ___. Do not touch! 
At the back, Yoongi writes, I’m sorry. Here’s a man who knows how to apologize, you think to yourself.
The bowl of jjajangmyeon is inside, as well as a container of gimari. The scent reminds you of how hungry you are, so you heat up the noodles and inhale your dinner as you stand by the table. The empty office and the faint sounds of the air conditioning make you think of how alone you really are - working past your hours on a Wednesday evening, a takeaway meal from a friend you’re pushing away, and a stressful trip back to your empty studio apartment. 
You rarely ever feel lonely. You don’t equate being alone with that specific emotion or state. There’s certainty and clarity you get from being on your own. But on certain days, you let yourself crack a little and be vulnerable. On certain days, you let yourself admit that being alone makes you feel lonely, and that at this precise moment, it’s exactly what you feel. 
You send Yoongi a message of thanks but don’t extend the conversation after he replies. You know it isn’t his fault, and knowing him, he wouldn’t have deliberately said anything that would’ve put you in this position. It could just be Jungkook misconstruing things, but you’ve been caught off guard and you don’t feel like dealing with anyone right now. 
Resuming your work, you do your last review of the expense report and leave it on his desk for his signature in the morning - a struggle considering how messy it is, which is also a rarity, as he always likes to keep things organized. You can tell how stressed he is just by this, and the thought hits you again that it’s the Board meeting in two days, and he needs you to be your best for him; he needs you to be calm and stable for him. 
Whatever you’re feeling can be pushed to the side until next week. You’ll talk to Yoongi after all this is over, you tell yourself; it’s more important that you focus on your tasks and just act as professionally and as unbothered as possible. 
That proves to be easy early the next morning. You go about preparing Jungkook’s day in his penthouse, going over your coordination and organization of the upcoming events and acting as if what happened yesterday doesn’t bother you, with him not acting out of the ordinary, too. It’s easy when you get to the office as well. He signs off on the expense reports and you go to finance with only minimal clarifications needed.
But when you return to your desk and Jungkook calls you to his room, you feel the tension start to build as you find Yoongi seated on the chair, his face turning sullen at the sight of you. 
You nod at him but look away immediately, shifting your gaze towards Jungkook. 
“What can I help you with, Mr. Jeon?”
“Deciding on the pieces to be displayed in the event halls of the Arts Center,” he replies. “Artist Lee Jaemin gave us her portfolio for us to choose from. And I’d like you and Yoongi to work on it together before lunch.”
This prompts you to look at Jungkook in surprise. He just told you off about the things you told Yoongi - which, to your defense, wasn’t even anything substantial - and now he’s making you work with the man.
“What about the run through of your presentation, sir?” You ask.
“I’ll do it with Manager Lee. His feedback will be adequate,” Jungkook replies. “I need your options because I’ll be speaking with her tonight about the chosen pieces.”
“I
, uh,” you stutter. “In what way can I be of help, Mr. Jeon? Wouldn’t Mr. Min be enough to make those decisions?”
“You hold the budget, Ms. Cho,” he reminds you. “We need to make sure we follow it. And you and Mr. Min understand my vision more than anyone and I need both of you to bring that to life with those artworks. I’m packed with meetings today so I don’t have time to sort through all of them. I trust that you’ll make the best decisions.”
“Of course we will, Jungkook,” Yoongi says, a bit of bitterness laced in it. “___ and I work well together. It isn’t the first time.”
Jungkook merely nods, and you feel the tension build up even more as both men share hardened looks that you can’t particularly decipher. 
“I
 I’ll go ahead and prepare the conference room. I shall see you there shortly, Mr. Min.”
You exit the office and breathe a sigh of relief from being out of there. You don’t know what their friendship is like, so you’re unsure if the tension is a sign of something serious or if it’s just a normal thing for them. You choose to brush it off for now and prepare for the meeting, walking to the pantry for a cup of tea before you do. 
Back inside, both men remain unmoving, their gazes not faltering away from each other. Yoongi’s look of displeasure is a contrast to Jungkook’s somber, almost guilty face. 
“Driving a wedge between us is kind of an asshole move, you know?” Yoongi finally says. “I don’t know what your deal is but this isn’t how you make it up to her. You don’t get to be nice one day then just decide you’ll be jealous and irrational the next without her even knowing what she did.”
“That’s
 that’s not what I was trying to do,” Jungkook reasons. 
“Then what were you trying to do?” Yoongi scoffs. “I was the one she turned down to have lunch with you. Actually, it was her plan, because she’s been spending so much time alone and she just wanted to hang out with a friend. And not only did you hinder that, you also made her feel like she did something wrong when all she said was that you had to talk about the Board meeting. No one would even bat an eye. Now she can’t even talk to me properly without fearing it’ll hurt your fragile ego.”
The truth is a huge slap on Jungkook’s face, and he feels it sting. He’s seen your comfort around his friend a few times. He also knows that Yoongi has been looking out for you when you fail to take care of yourself. And because of that jealousy and his fragile ego, you might just end up pushing Yoongi away, and isolating you is the last thing Jungkook wants to do.
He tries to say something but his throat dries up, knowing that verbalizing anything would prompt him to face feelings he’s trying so hard to suppress. He hopes Yoongi sees right through him, and the sullen look of the older man says he might.
“You’re not a bad person, Jungkook,” Yoongi says. “I don’t know what about her makes you like this. But if all you’ll do is find fault in everything she does, you’re gonna lose all the progress in your relationship. And you've got to know that’s not fair to her. You know she doesn’t deserve that.”
“She doesn’t.”
It’s the way Jungkook says the words that Yoongi knows his friend regrets what he’d done, perhaps not just yesterday but the other times as well. There’s this emptiness in Jungkook’s eyes that Yoongi hasn’t seen before; he doesn’t want the younger man to drown and lose himself in it.
“I’m
 I’m, uh—”
“I know,” Yoongi interjects, knowing how hard it is for Jungkook to verbalize what he feels. “And I forgive you. I suggest you find the words and say them to her. Yeah?”
Jungkook merely nods, knowing that would be difficult for him, not because he won’t mean it but because they mean so much more. With you, it always does. 
“I’ll head to meet with her now.”
“Please fix it,” Jungkook almost pleads. “I think she needs you.”
Yoongi gives a look of understanding then heads out to the conference room where he finds you seated already. The lights are dim, allowing him to see Lee Jaemin’s art pieces projected on the wall. You’re focused on your laptop screen, not budging even as he opens the door and sits next to you.
“Are you still mad at me?” Yoongi asks, urging you to look at him.
“No,” you say softly.
“Then why do you act like you still are?” He asks sullenly. “You know I’m sorry.”
“It isn’t your fault though,” you reply, finally turning to him, your own soft eyes mirroring his. “You shouldn’t be apologizing.”
“But I want to. Because I know it matters that you hear the words even if they’re not from the person who needs to be saying them.”
“You know he doesn’t do that,” you sigh, knowing exactly who he means.
“He’ll have to learn how to. Or just stop having a reason to apologize in the first place.” 
“We’ll see about that,” you shrug. “But I’m sorry, too. I just didn’t know how to act yesterday and earlier. I just didn’t want any more drama.”
“I know, and it’s okay. It’s not your fault either. I had to call him out for it.”
“You did?”
“Yeah. I called him an asshole.”
“You–what?”
“Well, sort of. He had to hear it, and it seemed like he knew it, too. That's why he wanted me to fix things. Not that anything was broken, as far as I know.”
“Is that why he made me meet with you?”
“Yes, about something that he and I could easily do over coffee or a meal,” Yoongi chuckles. “But like I told you before - he tries. It’s usually just a misstep or something more complicated than actually saying sorry.”
“It’s hard for him to say, I guess. Maybe he just has his own ways of saying them.”
“It’s still not an excuse to be an asshole though.”
“At least you’re there to call him out for it,” you chuckle.
Yoongi laughs along, knowing it’s a role in Jungkook’s life that he wouldn’t mind taking. And just like that, the tension between the two of you is gone. He throws in a few jokes in there that take seconds for you to process, and it’s his crinkled smile that makes you smile and feel comfortable as well. It’s the icebreaker you need before getting to work, and it takes you both until lunchtime to decide on which of Lee Jaemin’s pieces you think would fit well in the event halls that Jungkook wants to put them in. 
It’s a different experience for you, as you’ve never made decisions like this before. You wouldn’t say you’re artistic in any sense, but Yoongi’s approval of your choices and agreement with your reasoning make you feel that you aren’t as design-blind as you think. And while Jungkook has the final say - you’re not even sure if your choices would make the final cut - it’s still satisfying to see the empty spaces come to life on your screen with artworks that you chose with Yoongi, while still being within budget.  
You both walk back to your work area where you see Manager Lee, and he tells you that Jungkook seems ready for tomorrow’s Board meeting. You enter his office with Yoongi, presenting what you’ve come up with - the greens and pinks common in her pieces give the room so much life, and the imperfections of her subjects leave viewers with much to admire. From the tropics to intimacy, the bright yet muted palette of the images elicits both joy and loneliness.
Jungkook goes through them while you and Yoongi look on.
“I’ll check each piece again later,” Jungkook says. “But these look good; I’d choose these myself.”
“___ chose most of them,” Yoongi says, earning him a glare from you.
“Is that so, Ms. Cho?” Jungkook asks.
“Mr. Min helped. And those pieces just spoke to me, I guess,” you answer shyly. “They’re beautiful pieces, Mr. Jeon. But I don’t have any arts or design background so please feel free to change them.”
“We’ll see,” he says, looking at you with a kind of affirmation that you’re not used to. 
You nod in response and check the time. He’s got another meeting in an hour and he should be having lunch soon.
“What would you like to eat, Mr. Jeon? I can get it for you,” you say.
“No need. I asked Mr. Ri to get me something. I figured you might have lunch plans,” Jungkook responds, glancing at you and then Yoongi. 
You look at the man next to you, who motions towards the door and you get what he means immediately. 
“Okay, Mr. Jeon. I’ll go take my break now.”
You walk out with Yoongi who asks you what you’re craving, and sweet and sour pork comes to mind. He chuckles at your excited face, and you grab your purse and head out, turning back once to catch Jungkook watching you walk away.
Maybe this is his apology. In whatever form it is, you’ll take it. You find sometimes that the silence in place of words means a lot more, in ways that feel more. 
The rest of your afternoon again feels like a blur, as you meet with the support team about the upcoming events and make sure everyone is on the same page. You spend an hour on the phone with Lucas about some Singapore and Malaysia-based Korean artists who are flying for the project launch in a few weeks while Jungkook goes from one virtual meeting to another. 
It’s 5:30 before you know it, and you’re working on your spreadsheets when Jungkook walks out of his office, saying that he’s meeting with Lee Jaemin later in the evening and that he’ll just update you about the final pieces. 
You acknowledge him and wish him goodbye, but he stops on the way, at the entrance towards the hallway, making sure he remains present while unable to see you.
“Ms. Cho,” he calls out, surprising you.
“Yes, Mr. Jeon?”
“About what I said yesterday, I apologize,” he says, almost stuttering. “Especially if it caused a rift between you and Yoongi. I didn’t intend that.”
You’re too shocked to say anything, much more process the words that you can’t believe he’s saying. But he really is apologizing; he really is trying.
“It
 it’s okay, Mr. Jeon. I understand.”
There’s a beat of silence, and you’re left to observe him from this angle - jaws clenched, head bowed down. 
He deeply exhales. “I’ll go now. No need to stay late; you can go home when you’re able.”
“Okay, sir. Have a good night.”
He finally leaves, and the silence engulfs you. Sometimes, words in any form truly matter. You could only hope that Jungkook knows that.
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The suit that you choose for Jungkook for today’s big day is a dark gray textured piece. He looks immaculate as he stands before you, and you try your best to even your breathing as you fix his tie like you do every morning. There’s something about him today that makes him more handsome than usual - a quality that you’ve found yourself admitting and accepting more easily as the days go by. He exudes a certain kind of confidence and power with his attire and his parted hair. There’s determination in his eyes as he stands tall, ready to face the day. 
And you’re there, admiring the way he carries himself just inches away.
You fix the collar of his suit and make sure that all creases are flattened. You meet his eyes and the confidence melts away a little.
“Do I look respectable enough?” He asks, a little less serious than you expected. It’s when you see the nervousness in his eyes that you know how important today is for him.
“Yes,” you assure him. “You also look ready to impress the Board members with your presentation and get them on your side. I’m sure your vision about the Arts Center will make them believers.”
“Ah, well, that’s asking for too much, I guess,” he laughs dryly. “But I was on the call with Lee Jaemin last night and she was so excited for the launch. It would get her to visit Seoul often, she said, and that made me realize that artists like her and the consumers, the ordinary people, the ones who the Center is for - they’re the ones who matter. It’s their interest and appreciation that I value, not the Board’s.”
“That’s a good realization to come to, then, Mr. Jeon,” you smile, suddenly feeling like you’re seeing a different man - someone who cares about meaning and the power of art. “I suppose if that’s your mindset coming into the meeting, then you’ll definitely do well.”
“I think if there’s at least one other person who ends up believing in the value of the Center, that would be enough for me,” he says, holding your gaze for a while before turning away. “But uh, today is more than that. You and I both know they’re there to assess my capabilities - social and otherwise - and definitely point out what I lack, or probably tell me I’m not cut out for this job or that I’m terrible or something. I mean, you would know, right?”
His eyes, focused downward, slowly shift to you. You know what he means, and given that he isn’t the type to admit to things, this is probably the only other time that he comes close to acknowledging how he was to you.
“Mr. Jeon, if you’re indeed terrible, I would have quit after a week. Or
 well, after the second day,” you admit. 
“Why didn’t you?”
“Well, I couldn’t afford to,” you chuckle to ease the tension. “But also I
 I saw the change. And that’s always a good thing. Lacking something is normal. We all have things we need to work on but that doesn’t make us terrible people. That just means we need a bit of understanding from others. And that also means we just have to keep trying to be better.”
There’s a sullenness in Jungkook’s eyes but there’s acceptance and understanding, too. Perhaps it’s the most sincere you’ve seen him look, and of all the days that he needs assurance about how he’s been, today is when he needs it the most. Sure, there are still things about him that you wish he’d work on. He’s still not the best person in the world. He could still be a bit impulsive with you and can sometimes be irrational in your eyes and definitely needs work on dealing with his emotions. But he’s trying. That always counts for something.
“We do,” he nods.
“Your father believes in you. Hoseok believes in you, so does Yoongi.” Holding his gaze, you add, “so do I. So trust in yourself. If you can’t do it for you, you can do it for us.”
“Is giving pep talks part of the job description?” 
“It should,” you giggle. “But I’ve given several of them to Mr. Jung. I’ve learned that during stressful moments or just when we’re a little overwhelmed, it makes a difference to hear the things we already know from someone else.”
“I’m a little stubborn, but I hope you continue doing that for me. For as long as you think I deserve it.”
Jungkook doesn’t know where the honesty and vulnerability are coming from. But he’s found that with you, it’s natural - difficult because they’re things he rarely is around other people, but natural. He doesn’t want to question it anymore for fear of learning what else is instinctive for him when it comes to you. But with the way his insides melt with how you sweetly and assuringly smile at him, he realizes that his defenses against you are not that strong to begin with.   
“Well, we don’t have time to pass by a cafe for a nice breakfast so I asked Mr. Ri to get some instead,” you announce, changing the subject now. 
You walk towards the dining room where he follows, and you present a spread of pastries, walnut tarts, and sausage rolls alongside a large cup of coffee. 
“I don’t really eat before a big meeting,” he says, frowning a little. “I’m sure Lucas told you that.”
“He did, but I’m a little stubborn, too,” you counter. “Breakfast is important before a big meeting, Mr. Jeon. It’ll help you focus, even if that’s just one tart or half a danish or a quarter of a roll. Eating will improve your energy levels and lift your mood. It might help ease your nerves somehow.”
“Fine, but I’ll just have half a roll.”
“No worries. You can always eat some more throughout the day,” you say.
Jungkook ends up finishing the entire roll and a walnut tart, while you finish a danish and settle for tea. You pack up what’s left, and he instructs you to give the rest to the team. 
The car ride is quiet, save for the gentle sound of his pencil gliding through the pages of his leather notebook. He seems to be channeling his energy in a way that allows him to be calm, you think, and that’s a good thing. 
You arrive at the building and Jungkook goes straight to his office while you excuse yourself to go to the conference room to help the other assistants prepare it. You don’t see Jungkook until an hour later when he enters, and you lead him to his seat then serve his coffee afterwards. It gets busy quickly as the Board members arrive, and you help in ushering them to their seats and catering to their needs. Before you know it, the assistants are heading out, leaving them and the executives to discuss confidential matters that none of you are required to know.
It’s another two hours before the presentations start, but Jungkook won’t go until after lunch. So you settle in your desk and work on various things, unable to fully focus because your mind constantly goes to him. 
This is normal, you convince yourself; you had the same nervous energy for Hoseok the first time he did this. But then again, it was your first time, too. Perhaps it’s knowing how much it means to Jungkook and his own worries that makes you feel uneasy.
You understand the feeling of wanting to prove oneself, and not always being able to fully express that desire to others. He’s been honest with you recently, and sometimes it can feel quite isolating when no one is there to share the burden, which is why you’ve been trying to cheer him up and encourage him, in hopes that he’ll feel supported, that whatever happens today, he knows he has you on his side.
You proceed to the function hall for the catered lunch where you meet Jungkook. He shares the table with Hoseok and Bitna, as well as Ji-woo and her assistant, and you engage in conversation with them like old times. 
Jungkook watches you speak to his cousins casually but respectfully, and he doesn’t miss the inside jokes and personal details that you all share. You still look a little reserved, but there’s this comfort in the way you express yourself around people who trust and care for and respect you. 
He’s always known Hoseok and Ji-woo to be great with the employees, and a part of Jungkook envies that they’re able to just share parts of themselves with others, that they’re able to expend their time and energy being around them, something that’s always been difficult for him. He likes his privacy, likes his own space; he revels in the silence to battle the noise in his head. He’s protective of his thoughts and his feelings; he’s particular with who uses his time and energy on; he keeps his distance because it’s always easier - to not be involved, to not be invested, to not be known at all rather than be judged because of what people know. 
He also thinks it’s quite isolating. Outside of his family - whom he keeps his distance from as well - the only person who knows him enough is Lucas, but it’s as shallow as just knowing his preferences and his technical opinion on things, not his dreams or fears or everyday thoughts and emotions. 
Jungkook isn’t someone that people go to for advice or for encouraging words; he’s not someone that people ask about how he’s doing; he’s not a person that others seek for comfort or warmth. He’s just a man who does his work, that people serve, that people want approval from for their own gains. He’s not someone they’d go through lengths for. He just takes up space that others orbit around but he’s not the center of their world; he isn’t anybody’s.
“Is everything okay, Mr. Jeon?” You disrupt his thoughts. “Is there anything you want?”
“Chocolate milk,” he says too quickly. “Uh, only if there is.”
“Hot?”
“Yes.”
You call the server and ask if they have any, but the man says they don’t, so you decide to head to one of the stalls at the food hall downstairs.
“You don’t have to,” Jungkook says, pulling your wrist in reflex as you stand up.
You’re caught off guard and so is he, and he immediately lets go and apologizes for it. The guilt in his eyes is similar to the one you saw at the restaurant when you’d admitted that he made you feel uncomfortable, and something about it makes you feel moved. 
“I mean, uh, it’s okay. It’s not urgent,” he adds, looking away.
“If it’ll help, then I should get it for you, Mr. Jeon,” you insist. “It won’t take long. I’ll be back before lunch ends.”
You don’t wait for a response and head out, leaving Jungkook with curious looks from his cousins.
“So, I see you’ve warmed up to her already,” Ji-woo hums, smiling. 
“You could say that,” Jungkook shrugs, acting nonchalant.
“Well, it’s about time you did,” Ji-woo shakes her head. “She works incredibly hard and she’s very reliable.” At the younger man’s nod in agreement, she adds, “you just had to give her a chance. There’s a reason why uncle and Hoseok wanted her around for you.”
“I guess,” Jungkook hums. “She’s
 she’s a good person. I don’t really know if I deserve that but she is to me. She’s required to be, I suppose.”
“Or she sees you as a human being who needs a bit of warmth and joy in his life,” Ji-woo suggests. “Kindness goes a long way, you know? She’s said before that there are people who have extended it to her and maybe she’s just doing that, too.”
“Or maybe she sees something in you,” Hoseok says now. 
“Like what?” Jungkook scoffs, knowing himself that after he’s treated you, there’s no way you’d see something in him, whatever that is.
“Like an emptiness, or yearning. Something she feels, too,” Hoseok responds. “Maybe she’s unknowingly making you feel something that she wants to feel herself, you know? I had A-yeong, my sister, my parents, my friends... Seeing her now with you, she didn’t pay attention to my every need the way she’s doing now, and that’s not a criticism of her. Perhaps she just knew that I had other people to do that.”
“And I’m the lonely, single, friendless man that she’s stuck with,” Jungkook laughs dryly, although he’s not offended. Deep down, he knows it’s true.
“Sort of,” Hoseok chuckles. “But what I really mean is that she knows what it’s like to not have someone to look after her like that. You may think it’s just her job but I think it’s her not wanting you to feel like there’s no one there for you. Maybe if you see it that way, you wouldn’t think you don’t deserve it. Then you can accept it and maybe you can do the same.”
“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” Jungkook counters, given that keeping his distance is exactly what he plans to do because any closer would just lead him down a path that he won’t be able to escape from.
“It’s not that deep,” Ji-woo says. “I think what my brother is saying is that it’s okay to be friends, you know? Or just allow her to be nice to you and then return the favor. It’s a much better dynamic. I mean, I’m sure he’s told you but things are just gonna be more challenging down the road, once you’re past the adjusting phase. You’ll need her like you’ve never needed anyone before. I do mean that professionally, but that also requires a kind of relationship where you know and trust and respect each other. It goes both ways.”
Jungkook takes in his cousins’ words, knowing that they speak from experience, and they’ve been doing this longer than he has. He already knows he needs you. That itself terrifies him. He also knows he has to rely on you, and maybe that entails allowing you to care for him in ways that no one - not since Chaerin, at least - has ever done before. That means letting you come close, allowing you to know him, letting you be there for him. Doing the same for you isn’t a question of whether he wants to or not - he’ll probably be denying it to his grave, but it’s about whether he can remain within the boundaries he set for himself, knowing already how you affect him without even doing much. 
The thought gives Jungkook a headache, but it’s not something he can give attention to right now. He’s got a presentation to do in less than an hour. He’ll be scrutinized and questioned and probably judged and then he realizes it again - he needs you through all that. He already knows you’ll be encouraging and supportive; you’ve shown that in the past week especially, and he’s appreciated and hated every single moment of it.
The hurried footsteps signal that you’re back, and you take your seat next to him.
You’re panting as you place the cup on the table. “Here you go, Mr. Jeon. I’m not sure if it’s as milky as you want it but the really good cafe downstairs said it should be good. Oh and uh, wrap your hands around it,” you instruct, earning you a curious look. “Your hands are very cold.”
Jungkook does as you say, feeling the warmth of the drink through his skin, even more when he takes a sip and finds that it tastes just as he wanted. 
“This is good. Thank you,” he utters, not wanting to meet your eyes.
You exhale a sigh of relief. You know how he has particular tastes and you just went with a hot chocolate even if he specifically said he wanted chocolate milk. There’s a brand he likes from Lucas’ list and you didn’t have time to actually get it or even store the office pantry with it - which you realize now you should do, and you make a mental note of doing an inventory so you could request for more of the things he likes later on.
“You’re welcome,” you reply. “I
 I hope it helps for the presentation. Or the nerves. Or just in general.”
“It has,” he confirms, humming with every sip.
Not long after, everyone is instructed to head back to the conference room so the meeting can resume. You take your seat with the other assistants at the side after you’ve ensured that the presentation is ready while Jungkook heads to the front. You watch him go through his notes a final time, and when he sets them aside and looks up, his eyes find yours.
They’re still tainted with worry, you can tell even from several feet away. So you give him a comforting smile, knowing it’s what he needs. You gently nod and give him a double thumbs up as if to say that he can do it, and he nods back, as if to say that he’ll do his best.
And that’s exactly what he does.
The presentation goes for a quarter of an hour, and while he does give a good rundown of the achievements of the past three months, it’s his pitch of the Arts Center that really makes him shine. The visuals are good to begin with. He did those blueprints himself and the designs give life to his vision, but he explains every aspect of the project with just enough detail to enable the audience to imagine how it looks and what it makes them feel. He took into consideration earlier worries about profits and brand reputation, as well as anticipated questions and points of attack, so he goes ahead and addresses them to the point that he can’t be scrutinized for anything that’s lacking. He keeps in mind the qualities of each Board member, so he makes eye contact if he needs to and acknowledges side comments and builds on them. 
He’s definitely added more - and improved - since that first runthrough you did with him, and he looks very confident and very respectable. You can tell that he values not just profits but art itself - its creation, its appreciation, and the various ways it can be experienced. As someone who yearns for that kind of passion for something, seeing him like this is quite moving. 
It doesn’t help that he looks as good as he does standing up there, and it’s a thought you let yourself have before dispelling it quickly. 
He gets approving nods from most of the Board members. The rest still look a bit doubtful, but you suppose they wouldn’t directly criticize Jungkook and his plans in front of everyone after a presentation like that. You also take a peak at CEO Jeon who’s unable to hide how proud he is of his son. Hoseok and Ji-woo exchange smiles as well. But Jungkook remains focused, ready to answer any questions or comments from the Board.
Mr. Mun is the first to commend him and doesn’t ask much. Mr. Im surprisingly praises Jungkook after admitting his reservations, and Mr. Saito, as you expected, asks clarificatory questions that just builds on what was earlier presented. Jungkook’s readiness and creativity are highlighted as well, and you can tell that the older man is extremely excited for this project. 
The hour is up before you know it, with only minimal questions and a few comments from the attendees. Ji-woo and Hoseok raise points to help with marketing and earning profit, and you take note of all those for discussion and debriefing next week. 
Jungkook thanks everyone before returning to his seat, and you see the breath he lets out after, seemingly glad that that’s at least over. You catch his attention again, and you can’t help your smile. He acknowledges you with a nod, and he turns his focus towards Hoseok as the next presenter. The afternoon goes by like this, with Ji-woo going last and CEO Jeon closing out the meeting. 
There’s some time before the fellowship dinner, which is spent with side conversations and check-ins. Mr. Saito goes to Jungkook right away and you see the latter’s face light up a little, although you don’t miss the sniffing and the throat clearing that he does. You think that his cold hands earlier weren’t due to his nervousness; perhaps the last month has finally caught up to him because you truly believe that this man does not rest. 
You head out to return to your desk, knowing you’ve got several things to do before the dinner that assistants are invited to. You fly through your notes from earlier and some administrative tasks before heading back to the event hall where you find Jungkook talking to Mrs. Seo and Mr. Ong this time, two people who’d most likely be critical of him so you’re glad that he’s at least forging some relations, if their animated way of speaking is any indication. 
You see him excuse himself to head to the washroom, and you take this time to order a cup of ginseng tea for him. It arrives just as he returns to his seat, and when it registers why you’d ordered it, he nods and mumbles his thanks.
“If I may, perhaps you shouldn’t stay long, Mr. Jeon,” you suggest. “It’s been a tiring week and you need to rest.”
Jungkook hates being told what to do, but he’s also never had someone tell him to rest because he needs it, much less even know that he’s not feeling alright. 
“I need to engage with the Board,” he reasons. “I’m sure that’s what father would like. I can rest during the weekend.”
“Okay, sir,” you sigh, knowing he’s also right. Perhaps he’s accepted that this is a critical part of his new role as Vice President. “Just let me know if there’s anything more that I can help you with.”
“I will.”
You sit at the table where the other assistants are, engaging in hushed conversations as you talk about the Board members and how tired you all are. It’s nice being around them, as you all share the experience of stress and isolation, of knowing too much sometimes, of security and stagnancy. They know what you’re going through, partially at least - unlike you, they have people to go home to and proper hobbies that excite them. They have loved ones close by and things they look forward to during the weekends. So while they do make you feel understood, you also can’t help but be a bit jealous. 
Your thoughts are suspended when Bitna offers to take you home. It’s well past 9 and you’re not keen on staying longer to drink with the rest of the big bosses here. You glance at Jungkook who has a wine in hand, clearly trying his best to keep up with the conversations he’s a part of. He looks incredibly tired - much more than usual - and you feel bad that this isn’t something you can help him with. 
You take Bitna’s offer and you both head to your respective bosses to bid your goodbyes. Jungkook nods and mentions his meeting with the artist last night that he says he’ll discuss with you on Monday. There’s more you want to say, but you worry he’ll think you’re nagging about his health - which, you remind yourself, is also part of your job - and you don’t want to end the week on a sour note. 
Jungkook watches you leave the event hall and he immediately feels your absence. Even when you spent much of your time apart, he could feel you there, partly because of the ginseng tea that you ordered for him twice at your insistence and partly because the knowledge that you’re around is enough. And now you aren’t, and he suddenly can’t stand any more of the socializing he has to do. 
But he powers through it for another hour. When he bids his father goodbye, the older man commends him for his presentation earlier and the way he handled himself throughout the fellowship dinner. It’s assuring, but he knows there’s so much more work to be done so he doesn’t revel in it any longer than a few seconds. 
The drive home is quiet. His soft groans as he massages his temples are the only sounds in the car. When he arrives at his empty penthouse, he grabs a bottle of whiskey from the counter and sits on the couch - a glass in hand, necktie and buttons undone, feet on the coffee table, and head rolled back as he reminds himself that he survived the day, that he did a good job, and that he changed some of the Board members’ minds about him. 
And much as he tries to keep away the image of you, he’s unable to - there you were in the room, on his side, cheering him on. He didn’t miss the satisfied smile on your face once he finished his presentation, nor your look of worry after the ginseng tea was placed on the table. 
You’re just good at that - making him feel like someone looks out for him, that someone else minds that he succeeds, that someone cares that he’s not well and that he should rest. 
The smile on his face fades once he’s reminded that you’re supposed to do all that, and that he isn’t anyone special, nor should he be. It’s the thought that keeps him behind the lines - you’re unattainable in so many ways, yet he’s also glad that you are. It’s easier to be mindful of his place like that; it’s easier to accept that you’re you and he’s him, and it’s easier to do his job when he knows you’re just doing yours.
At least, that’s what he hopes. 
But when he gets a call from reception the next morning about a package that you dropped off, all that wishful thinking seems pointless. And as he stares at the bowl of chicken noodle soup in front of him, all his thoughts from the night before come crashing down.
Why is everything so hard when it comes to you?
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hellodarling1357 · 3 months
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Hello! Heard your requests are open so could I please request a cassian x f!reader fic where the reader is a babysitter for cassian's baby girl (maybe less than a year old). cassian is a single father so as time goes on and cassian sees reader bonding so well with his baby, he starts liking her more and more. eventually asks her out and they end up getting together and all❀
Tiny Toes
Thank you so much for the request! I had the best time writing this, it honestly could’ve gone on forever
A/N: sorry for the slight Nesta slander, I really do love her as a character but needed to have her do this :(
Enjoy đŸ„°
Word Count: 6.6k
You didn’t think you would be babysitting at this stage in your life but with your boss firing you because you refused to sleep with him, and then refusing to put in a good word for you when potential employers contacted him for a reference, it seemed like the next best, and your only, option. If anything, it was a means to an end in terms of supporting yourself whilst you got back on your feet and sorted something else out; the fact that you absolutely adored babies and children was just a bonus perk of the job.
When your close friend Elain told you that she knew someone who would really appreciate your help, you jumped at the opportunity. However, what you weren’t expecting was to come face to face with the General of the Night Court’s armies, crying baby in his arms and a distressed expression of his face.
“Y/N?”
“Yes, hi
” You trailed off, unsure how to address the male in front of you. General? Lord? But he didn’t seem to notice your hesitancy as he gestured you inside.
“Hey, I’m Cassian. Seriously, thank you so much for agreeing to this. I know it’s last minute, but somethings come up and I just
 Well, I really need the help, so thank you.”
You smiled at him, taking the time to look around the open layout of the house as he tried to settle his crying daughter. You couldn’t help but cringe a bit at the state of the place. There were baby clothes and toys everywhere, plates and dirty laundry piled up, not to mention the daggers and knives that seemed to be scattered throughout the place.
“This,” Cassian said as he walked back into the lounge room, the babe now happily looking around, “is Otilia, or Ottie. Ottie, this is Y/N, she’s going to be looking after you while Daddy is away. You’re going to be a good girl for Y/N?” Ottie just smiled up at him as though he were her favourite person in the world, making happy little noises as she kicked her feet and grasped at the front of his top.
The sight had your heart melting. If you didn’t already know who Cassian was, there was no way in a million years you would’ve guessed that the male in front of you was the infamous General, the Lord of Bloodshed.
With Ottie still is his arms, Cassian moved around the room, gathering items, and trying to clean up what he could before leaving.
“I’ve left a note in the kitchen, just with all the general things like nap times, where the baby food is, where the nappies are, what her favourite toy is. But she’s a pretty happy baby so hopefully she won’t be any trouble.”
“I’m sure she’ll be perfect, won’t you, sweetheart?” You cooed at the little girl as she watched you with wide eyes. “Here, do you want me to take her so she can get comfortable with me while you’re still here?” You offered, as she wrapped her small hand around your finger.
“If you don’t mind. Don’t be offended if she starts crying, she usually takes a few minutes to warm up to new people,” Cassian passed her over, helping her settle in your arms, a protective hand cupping her cheek as he pressed a kiss to the top of her head. “Well, look at that, you’re clearly some sort of baby whisperer.”
Smiling down at her, you gently tickled her with your pointer finger, grinning as her feet started kicking, her sweet melodic laugh filling the room. Cassian hurriedly pulled the rest of his gear together, sending lingering looks over to the pair of you as he did so.
“Everything alright?” You asked as you sat on the green velvet couch, Ottie still in your arms. You knew how hard it could be for the parents, having a complete stranger looking after their children, so you tried to give Cassian the chance to ask any questions or dispel any concerns before he left.
“Yeah, yeah sorry of course. All fine.” He seemed to hesitate before leaning against the table as he watched Ottie, a loving smile gracing his features. “Sorry,” a sheepish expression replaced that smile as he met your eye, “it’s the first time I’m leaving her, and I can’t seem to make myself walk out the door.”
You softly laughed, trying to ease his tension as you said, “That’s completely normal. If it helps, is there a way I can get in touch with you while you’re out? That way you’ll know straight away if something happens?”
He gave you a grateful smile but shook his head, “No it’s nothing like that. After everything I’ve heard Elain say about you, I trust you with her completely. It’s more so that I just don’t want to be away from her, don’t want to miss anything, you know? Even if it’s just the same smile I’ve already seen a hundred times,” He chuckled as he got up to press a kiss to the top of her head, then her cheeks, then her tiny, clenched hands. “Trust me, I know how pathetic this sounds, I don’t even know why I’m telling you, but I just really love hanging out with her. It’s just been the two of us against the world, especially after everything that happened with
” He suddenly stopped, as if catching what he was about to say.
“Anyway, I should be off. I’m already half an hour late and have had Rhys mind yelling at me for the last 15 minutes. Thank you so much, Y/N. I should only be gone a few hours.” With a final kiss to Ottie’s cheeks, Cassian walked out the door.
"Well now, what are we going to do today, sweetheart?" You asked the small baby in your arms. She just fixed you with another smile and burst into giggles.
*****
You had spent the better part of an hour playing with Ottie, hoping to tire her out so that she would easily go down for her nap. You plan miraculously worked, after wrapping her up in a blanket and running a soothing hand over her stomach, she fell fast asleep without even the smallest fuss. Cassian was right, she was a happy baby.
You quietly closed the door behind you and headed down to the kitchen. With nothing else to do, you figured you would help by cleaning the place up. With the dishes washed and drying, the benches wiped, and rubbish taken out, you started on the piles of laundry, however, a small painting tucked behind a chair in the corner of the lounge room piked your interest.
You picked Cassian out of the painting immediately, the telltale red Siphons and overall uncanny accuracy making it an easy conclusion. You tensed upon looking at the female painted beside him. The similarities between her and your High Lady were all too familiar, this was clearly her sister, Nesta.
Quickly putting the painting back where it had been hidden you felt guilt course through you; you hadn't meant to snoop. You knew what had happened between Cassian and Nesta. Everyone knew what had happened. They had been mated for just five years before falling pregnant then two weeks after the baby, after Ottie, had been born Nesta had simply left. It was all the people of Velaris could talk about, wild rumours and stories spreading about what had happened. Eventually, the truth came out; she had left Cassian, left her baby, for Eris.
Elain had explained to you the pressure her sister had felt and had realised she was only with Cassian because everyone had said that was what the mating bond required. But she wasn't actually happy with him, and Cassian hadn't been happy with her either. Then there had been a visit to the Autumn Court, and something had sparked between Nesta and Eris. She had felt torn and confused but a baby was never something she wanted, and Eris was offering her a life where she could be her own person, not someone shadowed by her High Lady sister, according to Nesta.
Given all of this, you were surprised by how put together Cassian seemed. You couldn't imagine the conflicting emotions he would've felt with his mate leaving just days after they had had a baby. But he seemed to have picked up the pieces and, no doubt, had the support of his family during that time, but you supposed there did reach a point where his duties to the court had to be met again, and you were more than happy to step in and help where you could.
*****
Several hours later, you had just finished giving Ottie her lunch when a piece of paper appeared on the table in front of you:
Y/N, Cassian has asked that I let you know he is going to be later than anticipated and that he is very sorry for the inconvenience. However, if this doesn't work, let me know and I'll have someone over to watch Ottie as soon as possible - Rhys
You blinked.
Rhys? As in Rhysand, your High Lord? Just casually sending you a magically note? You blanched at the thought of him even knowing you existed, which, you supposed made sense, seeing that you were friends with his wife's sister.
You didn't mind staying longer to look after Ottie, but you had no way of conveying that to Rhysand or Cassian. As if your thoughts had been sent out into the abyss, a pen appeared atop the paper as if in answer to your question.
Hesitantly, you picked it up, unsure how to even start a note of this manner that would be read by your High Lord.
It's not a problem, High Lord. Please tell Cassian that I can stay as long as required - Y/N
You didn't have a chance to read over the message before it was whisked away by magic. But, shit. Cassian had introduced himself to you as Cassian, but should you have referred to him as General in your note? Had you been too informal or improper. Before you could mull over it any further, the piece of paper was back in front of you:
Lovely.
By the way, just Rhys is fine - Rhys
Well, that settled that matter.
*****
You had given Ottie her dinner and put her down for bed with little fuss. There had been a few tears once she sensed that Cassian wasn't there, but you had managed to coax her back to her happy little self by quietly singing and rubbing soothing circles across her dark mass of hair until she fell asleep.
Now you sat curled up on the couch with the makeshift dinner you had prepared and a book that had been on the bulking bookshelf that sat in the corner of the room. You were sure that Cassian wouldn't have minded your rummaging through the pantry but had made enough for him to eat once he came home just in case.
An hour or so later, you had been so engrossed in your book that you didn't hear the front door open or the heavy footsteps that padded down the hall.
"Hi," You looked up with a slight jump, having been startled by Cassian's sudden presence. He was leaning against the doorway and looked absolutely exhausted. "Y/N, I am so sorry. I was up at some of the Illyrian camps and, well, things were worse than I anticipated... I won't bore you with all that, but I am so sorry for keeping you here."
You brushed him off, noticing the tension somewhat leave his body upon realising you weren't bothered by it.
"It's fine, I promise. The High Lord... Rhys," Cassian grinned at your correction, clearly privy to the notes that had passed between the two of you, "said you were going to be late. If it wasn't going to work, I would have let him know."
Cassian offered you another grateful smile as he slumped into the armchair opposite the couch. "How was she? Not too difficult?"
"She was perfect. A few tears at bedtime but we managed to sort that out. I think she was just missing you." You could have sworn his eyes twinkled at your last comment.
"Before I head off, I cooked some dinner and left a bit to the side for you in case you were hungry when you got back. I hope you don't mind?"
"Mind? Y/N, you are honestly cauldron sent. You also cleaned? All whilst looking after Ottie. Thank you."
You felt your cheeks heat up and preyed he wouldn't notice your slight blush.
"It was nothing, seriously. I had nothing else to do while Ottie was sleeping so thought I would help out. Why don't you go up and see her? I'll get dinner heated for you."
Cassian sent another grateful smile your way before leaving the room, you laughed to yourself as you heard his steps pick up in pace as he bounded up the stairs towards his daughter's room.
*****
He came back 10 minutes later just as you were putting on your coat and collecting your belongings.
"I've left your dinner on the stove to stay warm." You said over your shoulder. He really did look exhausted.
"Thank you, you have no idea how much of a life saver you were today." You brushed off the compliment as he led you towards the front door. "Oh, before you go, we never spoke about payment? How much do I owe you?"
Honestly, you hadn't even thought about payment, it had completely slipped your mind.
"Right. Don't worry about that now–"
"Y/N, I'm not going to not pay you for today."
"No, I know. But you look like you're seconds away from passing out, no offence. So go back inside, finish your dinner then go to bed. We can sort the money part out later."
"Okay, only if you're sure? Thank you again, so much. Get home safe, alright?"
"I will. Night, Cassian."
You had barely made it to the front gate before the door was opening again.
"Y/N? Before you go, would you mind looking after Ottie again in a few days? Rhys is needing me to get back into my work, so I'll need to have someone watching her while I'm away. You're so good with her, so if you wouldn't mind..." He trailed off.
"Of course, she's an absolute angel. I would love to look after her again. Let me know when you need me."
"Okay, Goodnight. Thanks again."
*****
Over a year had passed since you first met Cassian and Ottie. After the first few weeks, Cassian had sat you down and asked if you would be happy looking after her on a more permanent basis, so you had decided on four days a week while Cassian was busy helping out Rhys and the Inner Circle. Sometimes you would stay until later into the evenings if Cassian came home with piles of paperwork, helping with Ottie's bedtime and cleaning up the house, despite Cassian's protests that it was his mess to deal with.
"Y/N?"
You had just finished feeding Ottie her dinner when Cassian appeared in the doorway. You looked up at him, waiting for him to continue as you wiped the food away from her chubby cheeks.
"Ottie is turning two on Saturday, and I was just wondering, if you weren't doing anything, if you wanted to come to her birthday party? It won't be a big thing, but she adores you and it would be nice to have you there," You smiled at him, delighted that he even considered you important enough to be there to celebrate, but before you could reply, Cassian hurriedly continued, "Of course, there's no pressure. You probably want a break from us, it is your day off after all
"
"Cass, I would love to be there." His face lit up as your response.
"Good. Okay. Great," He remained in the doorway, still softly smiling as he watched you pick up Ottie from her highchair, "Well I better... Still got some work to finish off, so..." He gestured back towards his office and then made his way out of the room.
You were caught off guard by the momentary awkwardness that seemed to radiate from him, not used to seeing him in any other way but the confident and playful General who was absolutely smitten with his little girl.
*****
Standing outside Cassian's house, you lingered on the doorstep as you hyped yourself up to knock on the door. It had only just dawned on you as you walked over that the guests at Ottie's birthday party, weren't going to be any old day-to-day fae. No, you were about to spend the afternoon with your High Lord and Lady, and their inner circle. Not a daunting prospect in the slightest.
As luck would have it, you weren't given a chance to psych yourself out before the door opened, revealing a grinning Cassian and Ottie who merrily clapped and said your name when she saw you, arms reaching out for you to hold her.
"Hello, Birthday Girl. Don't you look beautiful." She giggled as you cooed at her and pressed a kiss to her cheek. "Hi, thanks for inviting me." You looked at Cassian now who was fondly watching the scene in front of him playout.
"Thanks for coming," Cassian opened the door wider for you to come inside, taking the pink gift bag you had brought with you that contained Ottie's birthday present. "Fair warning, everyone here has a bone to pick with you."
You froze, body tensing at his words.
"What?" You would have cringed at the stutter in your voice had you not been so worried. But Cassian just laughed and led you further into the house, a hand on the small of your back.
"Well, apparently since you've come along, Ottie doesn't have the time of day for anyone else. She was fussing all morning until she saw you walking up the road through the kitchen window. You seemed to have gotten lost somewhere between the gate to the door with how long you stood out there, so we thought we would see what you were doing, didn't we Ottie?" Cassian gave you a knowing smirk, clearly aware of your nerves towards who you would be spending the day with.
"Come on, I'm just joking. They're all dying to meet you."
Right on queue, a female, who you knew without needing to be told was Morrigan, jumped up from her seat as you walked into the room.
"Y/N," She squealed as she bounded over and pulled you into a tight hug, Cassian quickly grabbing Ottie out of your arms. "It's about time we all finally get to meet you. First Elain kept you all to herself, and now Cassian? If you had said no to coming today, I would have gone over to your house myself and forced you to be here."
"Mor..." Cassian's tone was laced in warning, but you immediately felt at ease in her presence.
"Come on, let's introduce you to the others."
*****
To your absolute delight, the rest of Cassian's family welcomed you into their group with open arms. Elain had jumped up and refused to leave your side once she noticed you had arrived. Having been away with Lucien for some time, it had been a while since the two of you had been able to catch up.
After the presents had been opened - Ottie had adored the fluffy bear you had gotten her - everyone was lounging outside, watching as little Nyx sat with his younger cousin in his lap, showing her all of the presents she had received and telling her the best way to play with them in order to have the most fun. Clearly the ever-destined High Lord in the making, you had grinned, already seeing the type of male he would become as Feyre and Rhys watched on sharing content smiles.
It was only then that you realised that Cassian was missing from the group. You excused yourself and headed back inside, searching the house until finally finding him in Ottie's bedroom.
"Hi," You voice was quiet as you made your presence known, unsure if he had just forgotten something up here or if he needed a moment to himself.
"Hey," He turned to face you, looking as though he had just been pulled out of some sort of trance. However, his lopsided smile was quick to return as he said, "sorry for leaving you out there with that lot."
Letting out a laugh you walked into the room, "They're really not that bad. Imagine what the other courts would think if they ever saw the High Lord of the Night Court dressed up in a pink tutu with a fluffy matching crown on his head."
Cassian laughed at that, smile widening as the voices and shrill giggles from outside echoed through the bedroom window, but that reserved expression was quick to reappear.
"You alright?" You quietly asked, already having a sense of what was eating him up.
"Yeah, fine." A glance at your unconvinced expression had Cassian letting out a low sigh before continuing. "I thought she would've at least shown up today. I know she wants no part in this, but it's still her daughter’s birthday. For Ottie's sake, I thought she would've shown. She needs her mum."
You let out a sigh of your own now, crossing the space between you and wrapping your arms around him in a tight hug.
Pulling away you said, "Cass, I get it. Believe me I do. But Ottie is doing just fine. You're absolutely amazing with her and it's so special watching the two of you together. And in terms of her needing her mum, look at all the amazing females Ottie has in her life: Mor, Feyre, Elain, Amren. There's no short supply of love for her, if anything, Nesta is the one missing out on this."
The words had rushed out of you without being able to truly process what you had said. You and Cassian had never directly spoken about Nesta, it had always been an unspoken awareness that you knew what had happened and that was enough. Looking at the ground, you could feel yourself tensing with worry at the thought of having overstepped.
"And she has you."
"What?"
"And Ottie has you. You were listing off the amazing females she has in her life but missed the one who she spends the most time with. The one who she loves the most."
There was no stopping the blush that crept over your face as you stared back at Cassian.
"Cass-"
But the sounds of hurried little footsteps running up the stairs interrupted whatever you had been about to say.
"Uncle Cass, Uncle Cass," Nyx burst into the room, dramatically taking in deep breathes as he waved up at you.
"What is it, bud?" Cassian shot you a bemused glance, still somewhat laced with the intensity from before, then knelt in front of Nyx who lifted his arms and placed his little hands on Cassian's shoulders.
"It's cake time. Come on." Then he was running out of the room again.
"You'd think it was the end of the world with the entrance he just made." You let out a laugh but before you could respond, Nyx was bursting back in.
"Come on." He yelled, grabbing you and Cassian by the hand, and forcing you down the stairs to where Elain had just finished lighting the candles on top of the cake.
*****
The rest of the afternoon raced by, so fast, in fact, that you didn't have time to process the moment you and Cassian had shared until you were home. The intensity in his expression as he stared at you and the implication of his words... Your heart was racing at the mere thought.
Letting out a groan you tossed and turned in your bed, unable to settle your racing thoughts at the realisation that you had, somehow, without even being aware of it starting, had begun to fall for Cassian. To make matters even worse, you had no idea where you truly stood with him. Despite the closeness and friendship that had formed, he was technically still your boss.
You had a whole day before you were due back to look after Ottie. A whole 24 hours to figure out how you wanted to move forward in the wake of this realisation.
*****
Monday morning arrived much too quickly for your liking. It wasn't until the door opened and Cassian greeted you on the other side of it that you decided you weren't going to do anything about your feelings. He had been emotional the other day, grieving what he thought was missing from his daughter's life and, honestly, you thought to yourself, he probably hadn't even intended it to come out the way you had perceived it. He wasn't wrong, you did spend a lot of time with her. But you were paid to do so, so did it really count?
"Morning, Y/N? Have a good rest of you weekend?" Oh, sure it had been fantastic. Just a nice dose of inner turmoil. But of course, you didn't say any of that.
"I did," You smiled at him, acting as though your insides weren't currently screaming out. "Did Ottie have a good birthday? It was so nice meeting everyone."
As Cassian got ready to leave, your usual chatter filled the space as you made yourself a coffee, but you couldn't help but notice that his usual, carefree smile didn't quite meet his eyes, and that he seemed to be watching you as though waiting or assessing something.
"Alright, well I might be home a bit later tonight, if that's alright?" You brushed him off, of course it was alright, it always was. You sat down next to Ottie as she continued to happily munch away on her breakfast. "Okay, bye Ottie, you'll be good for Y/N today?" He pressed a kiss to her cheek before turning back to you, "See you later, yeah?"
"Mhm," You replied, "have a good day."
"You too." Then he was leaning down and pressing a kiss to your cheek as well before standing up and leaving as though nothing had happened.
What. The. Fuck.
You stared at the empty door frame he had walked through, only half hearing the front door close as he took off.
Again.
What. The. Fuck.
You turned to look at Ottie, as though she would provide you with some sort of explanation as to what just happened, or to confirm that it had even happened in the first place, that it wasn't just something you had imagined.
But she provided you with no deeper insight as she sat in her seat, happily kicking her little feet and giggling to herself. Upon noticing you watching her, she gave you one of her big cheesy grins you had grown to love and offered you a piece of the fruit Cassian had cut up for her.
*****
What. The. Fuck.
Cassian's heart was racing as he flew up to the House of Wind. What had he done?
Clearly you were more than happy to ignore his complete lack of control from the other day, when he all but said you were basically like a mum to Ottie. He was surprised he hadn't scared you off, especially when all you had signed up for was to be her babysitter, which was a harsh truth in itself that Cassian found himself constantly having to remember whenever he watched you and his daughter interact and he felt his heart stammer in his chest.
And then to turn around and kiss you on the cheek before leaving for work - as you turned up for work, he had to remind himself, again - as though it was a normal morning, between a normal little family...
He felt sick.
He had really screwed up.
"What's wrong with you today?" Azriel asked as Cassian landed with an ungrateful grunt next to the training ring located on the roof.
"Nothing."
"You sure?" Rhys now asked, sensing Cassian's inner turmoil even through the steadfast mental shield he had up around his mind.
With a grumble, Cassian lowered said shield, giving Rhys a look at what had occurred that morning. Scowling even deeper when Rhys let out a bark of a laugh. The snicker that followed from Azriel as Rhys showed him what had happened sent Cassian marching into the training ring, readying himself to forget his stupidity as Azriel approached to spar with him.
*****
He hadn't even got half an hour into his training before pulling up short, his mind was too distracted.
"Should I have stayed?" He blurtedly asked.
"What?" Unbeknownst to Cassian, Rhys and Az had been having a silent conversation whilst he had been spaced out.
"This morning. With Y/N. Should I have stayed and, I don't know, talked about it?"
He missed the glance his brother's shared.
"Well," Rhys started. "What would you have talked about?"
"I don't know, what is there to talk about?" Cassian snapped back, frustration and worry getting the better of him the more he thought about what he might now lose.
"Would you have tried to pass it off as a joke, or explain it away?" Rhys cautiously asked, trying to judge which direction Cassian's mind was heading in.
"Or would you have stayed and finally admitted your feelings to her?” Azriel interjected.
"My feelings?"
"Yes, you idiot. And the fact that you're in love with her."
"I'm not in love with..." Cassian trailed off though. He was, he absolutely was, and there was no point in denying it.
Azriel scoffed, "Please, you're in love with her. We've never seen you like this before with anyone."
"Well, Nesta-" Cassian tried to counter but Rhys cut him off.
"Nesta wasn't love. That was the mating bond, you've said as much to us multiple times so don't try to deflect now."
Cassian let out a deep sigh, he wasn't expected home for a few hours and a plan was starting to form in his mind.
*****
You had been surprised, but pleased all the same, when Feyre turned up with Nyx.
"Y/N! Hi, how are you?" You still weren't quite used to the casualness that surrounded the rulers of your court but did your best to act as though being in their presence wasn't one of the most intimidating things you had ever experienced.
"I'm good. What are you doing here?"
"Well, it's such a lovely day, Nyx and I thought it would be nice to get you and Ottie over to ours for the afternoon."
"Oh, thank you. Are you sure though?"
"Of course, we can walk back now. Go along the Sidra if you'd like?
"Easy, let me just grab Ottie's things."
Feyre shut the door behind you, Nyx already running over to where Ottie sat with her toys and planting a big kiss to her cheek.
"There's no need to grab much. Cass bought double ups of basically everything and has them stored at ours for when we look after her. Just yourselves will do."
You smiled warmly at her before scooping Ottie up, "Do you want to go play at Auntie Feyre's with Nyx?
Her excited squeals were enough of an answer, still, she excitedly said "yes, yes, yes, yes, yes," as you headed out the door, watching as her and Nyx ran ahead of the two of you.
*****
The afternoon spent with Feyre was the perfect distraction from your racing thoughts after what had happened with Cassian that morning.
The two of you chatted outside until the sun started to set, watching Ottie and Nyx run around across the grass.
"Well, hello, Feyre, Y/N." Rhys greeted as he walked out to join you, still dressed in his leathers, clearly having just got home.
You said hi back, watching with a laugh as Ottie caught sight of who now stood with you.
"Uncle Rhysie." She yelled, her little feet pounding across the grass as she leapt into his arms.
"Hello, princess. How's my favourite girl?" Ottie giggled at the nickname and hugged into him even tighter, "What do you say to a sleepover tonight, Ots?"
Turning to you, Ottie still in his arms, Rhys said, "Cass is fine with it. I think he needed you to head back at some point before going home tonight though."
"Oh, alright. Well, I might head off now then. Bye Ottie." She looked around at you, eyes wide as she wriggled out of Rhys' hold and ran over to you.
"You're not staying?" Her lip started to quiver so you quickly wrapped her up into a hug before the tears started.
"Not tonight, sweetheart. But we can play all day tomorrow, yeah?" She seemed to contemplate this for a moment before deciding it was acceptable enough and planted a kiss on your cheek before running back over to Nyx.
Feyre and Rhys were both smiling at you, clearly watching, and overhearing the entire interaction.
"What?" You asked with a laugh.
"Nothing, you're just really good with her."
"Oh, well..." You trailed off, not sure what to say as Rhys' words from before struck. Cassian needed to talk to you about something and, well, shit, clearly you were about to get fired, or, more kindly, were about to be told your ‘services were no longer required’.
"I'll see you both later. Goodnight." You missed the conspiratorial grin they shared behind your back, Rhys letting his thoughts drift over to Cassian's mind to tell him you were on your way.
*****
The house was dark when you got back, the only form of light was coming from the study and, from the looks of it, the backyard.
"Cass?" You called out as you closed the door behind you.
Hurried movements sounded from his office, then Cassian was quickly walking towards you.
"Y/N. Hi."
"Hi."
You felt as though your entire body was on guard. You needed to explain that you could easily put your feelings aside, but losing the chance of being in Ottie and Cassian's lives was something that filled you with dread, you would be happy to stay on in whatever capacity you could.
"Do you... Do you want to talk?" Cassian's nervousness was unsettling, yet you followed as he led you towards the couch.
"What are you doing tonight?"
That wasn't the question you were expecting.
You hesitated before answering, "Just going home I guess."
He seemed to contemplate your answer, looking so much like Ottie did earlier when you were saying goodbye.
"Dinner?" His voice was strained, leaving you even more confused.
"Um, yeah I'll be having dinner."
"No... Ugh this isn't working." He leant his head against the back of the couch, running his hands over his face.
"Cassian, are you alright?"
"Yes. No. I don't know." You were stunned, maintaining your silence as Cassian continued. "This morning, Y/N, I'm sorry. I don't know what that was, it just happened without me thinking about what I was doing. And then everything I said at Ottie's birthday. And now, fucks sake..." He trailed off again, leaving you just as confused as he blurted out "I need to have dinner."
"Oh, sure," You felt as though you were waiting for the other shoe to drop, as if his bizarre behaviour was some sort of test. "Did you want me to heat something up? I think there's still some frozen pasta from the other night." You went to stand but Cassian placed a hand on your knee to stop you before quickly pulling it away.
"No, it's alright. I've got it sorted." Then he was standing, offering you his hand as he guided you towards the back door.
You froze at the sight before you. Candles flickered across the table and the deck, a table set for two, lined with trays of food and a bottle of wine which sat in the middle of it all.
"Cass?"
"Look, Y/N, I get it if this is completely out of line. If it is then I am so sorry. But I needed you to know that this, whatever this is between us, means something to me."
You couldn't move, you were stuck on the spot as Cassian continued, the flickering lights casting a shadow across his handsome features.
"It's not even because you're so good with Ottie. I mean, you are, you're amazing with her and she adores you, so, so much. But it's how you treat me. Even that first time you looked after her, I was so close to crumbling. I felt so torn, between staying home and looking after my baby girl, but also knowing I needed to step back into reality and my responsibilities. It wasn't fair on the others that they had to pick up my slack."
You tried to interject, to say something about how the others wouldn't have minded, not one bit, especially with everything Cassian had been going through at the time, but he was already moving on.
"Not going to lie, I was reluctant when Elain first told me about you. It was nothing to do with you," He quickly clarified, "But more so because you were a complete stranger to me, and as much as Elain vouched for you, I still felt wary."
"Then you walked in and that first time you held her; I swear my heart skipped a beat. Even with Elain and Feyre, it took them ages to be able to hold her without Ottie bursting into tears. But with you, it all just seemed to fall into place." His voice was beginning to shake, and you silently wiped the tears from your eyes as he kept talking.
"But if anything, Y/N, it's the way you make me feel. Before even knowing me, you had me convinced that I wasn't completely failing at being her dad, that even though everything was well and truly fucked up, she was doing just fine. You helped me realise that I was going to be fine as well."
Cassian approached you now, calloused hands reaching up to your cheeks as he wiped away the rest of your tears with his thumbs. "So, I guess what I'm trying to say, and what I'm not doing a very good job of getting across, is that I love you?"
A watery laugh left you at the overall Cassian-ness of the statement, the sound making him grin lovingly at you.
"I love you, Y/N. And I am so thankful for the day that you walked into our lives and changed them for the better. And, assuming I haven't completely misread the situation, and assuming that those are happy tears," He laughed, his own eyes beginning to well. "I was wondering if you would like to have dinner with me?"
With his hands still on your cheeks, you brought your arms up around his neck and pulled him down so that his face was level with yours.
"I thought you were going to fire me." You whispered.
A cheeky smile passed over Cassian's face, "Well, technically, I suppose I am? I can't have my...whatever you are to me now, being paid to look after my kid now, can I?"
"How romantic. Being fired then called your 'whatever'."
"We'll figure that out later." Cassian murmured against your lips.
"Yes, I suppose we will." Then you were leaning forward, lips pressing to his, feeling as though you were finally home.
*****
Part 2
There are so many opportunities for bonus spin-offs that I’m excited to write but if you want to see any particular scenario, let me know đŸ„°
819 notes · View notes
yxngbxkkie · 3 months
Text
mechanic's shop
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this airport look gives me such mechanic vibes that i had to write something on it đŸ€­ this is actually really fucking cute, and i hope you guys like it đŸ©·
feedback is greatly appreciated đŸ„°
You're nervous. Extremely nervous. you park your vehicle in the mechanic shop's parking lot, eyeing the semi-large building. You've never been to the mechanics by yourself.
When you had car problems before, your boyfriend was kind enough to take it for you. Now that you're single, you have no choice but to take it yourself. You didn't know any friends who had car knowledge like your ex did.
A deep breath comes from your lips as you internally hype yourself up. “There's no one else here,” you talk to yourself, eyeing the empty parking lot. You shut your vehicle off before getting out, pressing the lock button.
You walk into the building, scrunching your nose at the dingy smell. You move to stand in front of the desk, tapping the bell they have sitting on the counter. You wait until someone shows up, slipping your hands into your front pockets.
“Can I help you?” A voice asks, snapping you from your internal thoughts.
You lift your head, your eyes meeting a pair of dark ones. “Hi,” you mutter, clearing your throat. “Uhm, I'm sorry. I'm new to this, uh, do you think you'll be able to look at my car?”
The man in front of you giggles while adjusting the black beanie on his head. “I can do that, yeah. Do you know what's wrong with it?” He asks, walking around the desk.
You hiss and cross your arms across your chest while leading him to your vehicle. “I wish I knew what it exactly was,” you sigh. “I was driving it home last night, and the steering wheel started to shake. Like, a lot.”
“Hm, okay. When you were driving home,” he pauses, holding his hand out to take your car keys, “were you driving at a low or high speed?”
You hand him your keys, unlocking the vehicle for him first. “It was a low speed. I think I was going about forty,” you answer his question.
“Okay,” he nods, opening the driver's side door. “I'll bring it into the shop and take a look at it. Oh, my name is Chris, by the way.”
You smile at him, nodding your head as well. “Nice to meet you, Chris. Is it alright if I wait inside?” You ask, jabbing your thumb in the direction of the building.
“Absolutely. There's water in there if you're thirsty,” he smiles before lowering himself into the seat.
“Thank you so much,” you bow your head, clapping your hands together.
You watch him drive your car into the shop before heading back into the waiting room of the building. You pull your phone out of your back pocket and take a seat in one of the chairs.
When checking your phone, you notice a text message from one of your friends.
From: Hyunie 🎹
Hey! What are you doing tonight?! Felix and I are going to a bar and want you to come with us! Please go đŸ„ș
A chuckle leaves your lips at Hyunjin's desperation, shaking your head slightly while typing out a reply.
To: Hyunie 🎹
The only way I can go is if this mechanic job isn't costly 😭 Ya girl's car is fucked
You lift your head after sending the text, locking your phone right after. You watch Chris through the window in the shop, tapping your nails against the back of your case.
“Shit, he's really pretty,” you say to nobody, forcing yourself to look away from him.
The device in your hands vibrates, indicating that Hyunjin texted you back. You flip the phone over and open the notification, a louder laugh escaping your lips.
From: Hyunie 🎹
Girl, you need a new fucking vehicle I SWEAR 🙄 Felix and I will cover your tab! One of our friends is also coming, and I think the two of you would be so cute together đŸ«ą
You groan, slapping your face with your hand. Another groan comes out not even a few seconds later. You thought he was done trying to set you up with people. You're dead wrong.
To: Hyunie 🎹
I thought we were done trying to set me up?? Hyun, remember what happened last time? 😭
From: Hyunie 🎹
I know! I know, but I PROMISE this time is different! He's a good friend of mine, and he's such a green flag
You tilt your head back, not knowing if you wanna put yourself through this again. The last time Hyunjin set you up with someone, you got stood up. Then, when you went to confront the guy, he insulted you.
To: Hyunie 🎹
If I don't like him in the first hour, I'm leaving đŸ˜€
From: Hyunie 🎹
DEAL, OH MY GOD! OKAY! Text me later if you end up needing a ride! Love you! đŸ„°
Another laugh escapes your lips after reading Hyunjin's text. “What a crackhead,” you giggle, pushing yourself up from the chair and moving closer to the window.
You slip your phone back into your pocket before crossing your arms over your chest as you watch Chris inspect your vehicle. He lifts his head, meeting your gaze through the glass pane.
You provide a shy smile, and he returns it, wiping his hands with a rag that was tucked in his back pocket. He walks over to the door that separates the two rooms, opening it before leaning against the frame.
“Good news and bad news. Which do you want first?” He asks with a smile, motioning for you to follow him.
“Am I
 Am I allowed in here?” You ask nervously, following the man into the shop.
Chris chuckles and waves his hand. “I own the shop, so, yes,” he jokes with you, reassuring you that it was okay.
You mumble a quiet, “okay,” as you stop just before your car. Chris continues moving to stand underneath it. “I'll take the bad news first.”
“Bad news,” he pauses, grabbing the clipboard that's hanging from one of the metal poles. “I'm going to have to keep your car overnight.”
Of course, that'd be the bad news. You think to yourself and release a light sigh. “And the good news?” You question, clasping your hands together.
“Thankfully, your suspension is fine. The cause of the vibrations is because your tires are unbalanced,” Chris explains, causing you to blink at him in confusion.
“I–” you cut yourself off, not knowing what the hell this attractive man is talking about.
Chris chuckles and walks back over to you. He rubs your shoulder gently and goes over it again in terms you understand. “It won't cost very much either if you're worried about that,” he mentions, writing on the paper attached to the clipboard. “The reason you won't get your vehicle back until tomorrow is because my tire guy isn't here today. He comes in at eight tomorrow morning, and I'll have him work on your vehicle so I can get it back to you as quickly as possible.”
“I appreciate it,” you whisper, relieved that it won't cost you an arm and a leg.
“If you want to put your number on here,” he hands you the clipboard, pointing at the box where your number is needed, “I can call when it's all fixed.”
You nod your head, taking it from his hands. After jotting down your phone number, you hand the clipboard back to him. Chris thanks you before leading you back out into the waiting area.
“Do you have someone to call for a ride? I go on my lunch in a few minutes if you need to get home,” he offers, writing your information in the books.
“I can call someone,” you assure him, smiling. You pull out your phone again, clicking on Hyunjin's contact. “I thank you again for this. If you haven't noticed
 I've never done this before.”
He chuckles while shaking his head. “It's okay! I'm glad that I was able to help you,” Chris mentions, leaning against the desk.
You bow again before leaving the shop. You call Hyunjin's phone, pressing the device against your ear.
“Hey, Y/N, what's up?” His voice comes through the receiver.
“I need a ride,” you pout, releasing a giggle afterward.
Hyunjin laughs as well, hearing Jisung in the background. “Okay! I'm gonna send Hanji because I need to finish this. That's okay?” He asks.
“That's fine. I'm at,” you pause, glancing towards the sign. “Five-Star Auto.”
“Oh, okay! I'll let Jisung know. He's putting his shoes on,” he mentions, hearing him tell Jisung where you are. “He's on his way! I'll pick you up tonight at six, okay?!”
You laugh and agree before the two of you bid each other goodbye.
-
You're running around your apartment, trying to finish getting ready before Hyunjin arrives with Felix. You're nervous to find out the person Hyunjin's setting you up with. All you hope is that he's nicer than the last guy.
Your phone goes off, quickly checking it to see a message from Felix. Shit, they're here. You send a text, telling them that you'll be down in a minute.
After checking yourself in the mirror for the fifth time, you slip on some shoes before heading to the lobby of your apartment building. You speed walk out the main doors, finding Hyunjin's car immediately.
You slip into the backseat, greeting the two men sitting up front. “Thanks again for picking me up,” you chuckle, tucking loose strands of hair behind your ear.
Felix turns in his seat, smiling at you as Hyunjin pulls back on the road. “We're super excited that you're coming out. It feels like we haven't hung out in forever,” he laughs, his gaze going from you to Hyunjin.
“That's because it's been like a month,” Hyunjin groans, glancing at you through the rear view mirror.
“I'm sorry,” you laugh, combing your fingers through your hair. “I took the breakup pretty hard.”
Felix hums, nodding his head. “He was a dickhead. You didn't deserve any of that,” he sympathizes with you.
“It's okay,” you reassure the blonde, placing a hand onto his shoulder. “I've realized my worth, and he's not worth my tears.”
Hyunjin reaches behind you, patting your bare leg. “I'm so proud of you!”
The drive to the bar doesn't take very long. Twenty minutes max. The three of you walk into the dimly lit place together, keeping your hand on Hyunjin as you work your way through the crowd.
“The person I want to set you up with is already here,” Hyunjin almost screams, making sure you hear him over the music and patrons.
You feel yourself getting nervous as you look around. When Felix finally finds the table your mystery date is sitting at, you peek over Hyunjin's shoulder to get a good look at him. A sharp gasp leaves your lips as you find yourself looking at a familiar face.
Chris. You move to stand beside Hyunjin, showing yourself to him, and you watch his eyes widen. You shyly smile, waving your hand cutely.
“Hi, Chris,” you giggle, feeling the tips of your ears grow warm.
Both Hyunjin and Felix's jaw drops, their eyes dancing between you and Chris. “Wait, you know each other?!” Hyunjin asks, wiggling his index finger.
Chris moves over, patting the spot beside him for you to sit. You sit down in the booth, resting your arms on the table. “We just met today, actually. She brought her car to the shop,” he explains as the duo sits across from you two.
“I figured you would've put two and two together when I told you I needed to be picked up from there,” you laugh.
Felix slaps Hyunjin's arm, a playful scoff coming from his lips. “You pabo,” he laughs as well, standing back up from his seat. “First rounds on us!”
The two leave you and Chris alone, disappearing into the crowd. Silence fills the space around you, fumbling with your fingers.
“You look really pretty,” he compliments you, his eyes trailing down your body.
You blush at his words, dipping your head down. “Thank you,” you say loud enough, leaning into him slightly. “You look pretty handsome yourself.”
Chris giggles, becoming a blushing mess as well. Another moment a silence happens, and you kick yourself that you can't find anything to talk about.
“I'm sorry I'm a little awkward,” you tell him, turning your head to look at him.
He shakes his head, and he smiles softly at you. “It's okay. I can be a little awkward too,” he says, meeting your gaze. “I haven't been on a date in over a year, so I'm a bit rusty.”
“A year?” You ask in disbelief. How has this gorgeous man been single for over a year? You think to yourself, leaning your head against the palm of your hand. “You're such an attractive guy. I'm honestly shocked.”
Chris laughs some more, finding yourself giggling at how cute his laugh is. “You flatter me, really,” he says shyly, running his fingers along the column of his neck. “I work a lot, so I don't really have time for a relationship. Plus, the last person I dated kinda fucked me up a bit.”
You feel for him, being in a relatable situation yourself. “I get it,” you inform him, your lips formed in a tight smile. “I had something similar happen to me recently. Hyunjin's been consistent in trying to set me up, so I'll be happy again.”
“Am I the first one?” Chris asks, his hands slowly reaching out towards yours.
“Unfortunately, no,” you groan, flashbacks of the past two people you saw. “But, I will say that you're my favorite so far.”
He grins ear to ear, the tips of his fingers brushing yours. “Yeah? Then, I'm glad,” Chris giggles.
You allow him to play with your hand, getting butterflies as he drags his fingertips along your palm. “Has anyone told you just how adorable you are?” You sigh, feeling yourself falling for him already.
“A couple of people have,” he answers, his gaze steady on your conjoined hands.
“It honestly makes me want to kiss you,” you whisper to him, not sure if he heard you.
Chris’ breath hitches in his throat, slowly lifting his head to see your eyes on him. “I mean
 I won't, uh, you can if you want,” he stammers over his words, his ears turning red.
You're surprised he's going with it. You didn't know if you're moving too fast, but he seemed to feel the same way you do. “I don't want to make things uncomfortab–,” you attempt to say when Chris cuts you off.
His lips find a place on the corner of your mouth, the words dying on your tongue. Your heart pounds against your chest while squeezing his hands. You blink a couple of times as Chris pulls back.
Your free hand moves to the nape of his neck, pulling him back in. Your lips connect with his, finding yourself scooting closer to him. Chris releases the old on your hand, resting it on your bare thigh.
The kiss only lasts for about thirty seconds, pants leaving your lips afterward. He rests his forehead on yours before giggling softly.
“Your lips are soft,” he whispers, stroking your thigh with his hand.
Someone clearing their throat causes the two of you to pull away from each other. You glance to your right, seeing Hyunjin and Felix standing at the end of the table. Hyunjin smirks at you while sliding your drink in front of you.
“I take it you like him,” he says with a laugh, wiggling his brows.
You press your lips together and glance back towards Chris. “You did good this time,” you giggle, leaning into his shoulder.
~
tagging: @strawboorybunny @reddesert-healourblues @spacegirlstuff @moon0fthenight @foxinnie8 @like-a-diamondinthesky @prettymiye0n
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n33dy-slut · 2 months
Text
I respond to a lot of things, call me whatever you’d like. I’ll let you know if I dislike it.
That being said, my name is Jasmine and I love to be called it/it’s in kink.
I really want friends, especially other female subs!
Please reblog my things! I love seeing myself on other people's pages; please just tag me if you do!
Like I mentioned, I do happen to be owned by @lord-of-dom , so i would appreciate if you didn’t come to my DMs demanding absurd tasks that I would only consider doing for an owner. I can RP, but I don’t send pics, so don’t ask.
I get a lot of messages saying I make people hard and all these thank you notes that really make my day, but they clog up my DMs and make life a little harder. I’d like those to stay in asks, please and thank you! I don’t reply to a lot of DMs. I get bored of them sometimes, but if I consistently ignore you.. take the damn hint.
I am into both genders
I happen to be a switch (mostly sub)
KINKS: misogyny, patriarchy, choking, humiliation, degrading, hard kinks, bondage, stalking/creepy asks, misgendering (please call me it/its during kinkđŸ€€đŸ„°), hypnosis, being manipulated and gaslit, some overstimulation, denial, race play (again, call me what you like, it won’t get you blocked), things like that.
I really really love being referred to as an it or he, but I know I’m a girl is just so confusing and I need it. Please use my preferred pronouns when we’re not doing a scene.
If I don’t reply to your message, DONT take it personally. I probably just don’t know what to say, but i’m honoured you messaged me! I am interested unless I say otherwise, and telling me the depraved things you’d do to me is always the way to go.
I also found out that I need people to talk to before or after or even during scenes, like soft doms or generally not assholes. It’s overwhelming and starts freaking me out getting message after message about how you’ll rape me.
I love sign language and reading and writing I hate beating around the bush. Spit out what you’ve messaged me for, unless you’d genuinely like to have a nonsexual conversation. I love those. Please understand that outside of kink I am quite sensitive and take most of what is said to heart, I have a hard time picking up on sarcasm.
I have tinnitus (ringing in my ears 24/7) so I do get a lot of headaches and dizzy spells, don’t typically use headphones.
PLEASE send me asks for dares or questions or just creepy / stalkerish messages, I love those they simply make my day. DO NOT BE AN ASSHOLE.
LIMITS: I don’t want dick pics, I don’t like the idea of breeding.
I keep forgetting how to make these things, so this will be updated all the time. Of course, I don’t deal with minors or actual jackasses.
The two pictures at the bottom are for the dip shits who have brains as small as their dicks and can’t read my whole pinned.
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orobaxis · 1 year
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Hiii! I loved your last Ominis X reader fic so much 😍 I really hope you write more!! I have a few prompts I’d love to read but feel free to pick and choose any ones you like because I’ll take any Ominis content you give đŸ„°
- Reader gets hurt and has to go to the hospital wing. Ominis is super worried and spends as much time as he can with them.
- Reader falls asleep on Ominis’ shoulder (or vice versa)
- Ominis getting bad dating/flirting advice from Sebastian to use on reader. Queue a facepalm from Anne and a very confused reader
- Reader comforts Ominis after he receives a particularly bad howler from his parents
- Ominis and reader each trying to build up the courage to initiate their first kiss.
these are all so sweet oml!! ! happy valentine's day everyone! thank you for all the love! <3
valentine's day chaos
ominis gaunt x reader (hogwarts legacy)
word count: 1200
prompts:
-Ominis getting bad dating/flirting advice from Sebastian to use on reader
-Reader gets hurt and has to go to the hospital wing
-Reader falls asleep on Ominis’ shoulder
and another ask: Loved your Ominis story! More pleaseee! Maybe from the prompt list: “are you really so oblivious?” I feel like that’s so very Ominis to say haha!
beware of spoilers in the comments/tags/reblogs!
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ominis was doomed the moment he started to ask sebastian
unfortunately for him, he doesn't really trust anyone else for this super secret task he has appointed himself, and who else would he ask if not for his best mate sebastian? (literally anyone else)
"you want to ask y/n out on a date, do you?"
ominis tries to hide his shock, "what makes you say that?"
sebastian shrugs matter-of-factly, "well, it's valentine's day, and you've been talking about y/n all day today"
they both turn their heads to the sounds of y/n and anne laughing as they play summoner's court
"i have an idea on how you can woo y/n," sebastian suggests, and he basically sees ominis' ears twitch in interest
"well?" ominis starts, almost irritated, as he waits for sebastian, "what is it?"
sebastian smirks, "i know she will appreciate this and you will successfully woo y/n. women love grand gestures of love, y'know."
cut to charms class, all four of you are (kind of) listening to professor ronen talk about some softening charm when
BAM! the door burst open
you crane your head to see...
dwarves
three of them, wearing golden wings and carrying harps, making them resemble cupids...if not for the scowls on their faces
it may as well be goblins from the way they scowl and look around the room
you and anne exchange curious looks, wondering if professor ronen has somehow hired these dwarves, but judging from the curious look on his face as well, you doubt it
you miss sebastian elbowing ominis, an excited look on his face, and whispering, "here they are"
"y/n l/n?" one gruff dwarf calls out
you shrink next to anne, unsure of what the dwarf wants, but you have a sense that it wasn't good
professor ronen, bless him, is very confused, "um... excuse me?"
"are you y/n?"
"err, no...but--"
"y/n l/n?!" all three dwarves shout
anne pipes up, "here! she's here!" raising her hand to point at you
you try to glare at her, curious and anxious about the dwarves
one dwarf tosses you what appears to be a box of chocolates, which you almost drop, while another one clears his throat before reciting in a gruff voice
"y/n l/n, the sound of your laugh
is like my calming draught
i wish we would hug
you are a beauty and me, a lousy dugbog"
"dugbog??" ominis hisses at sebastian, who looks proud of his creation
everyone in the classroom giggles as the three dwarves try to do a pirouette and then vanish
"oh y/n," anne exclaims, "that was so..."
"sweet?" sebastian suggests
"embarrassing!" anne retorts with a laugh. behind her, you dont notice ominis turning pale (paler than he usually is already) before sending a mean elbow into sebastian's stomach (a hex too)
as the class tries to transition back to class, you see looks on their faces, excited to see what is inside the box
you open it and you see a chocolate frog
"oh," you sigh, relieved, before smiling, "this isn't so bad."
when you bite into it however, you feel your stomach turn
professor ronen and anne must have noticed how green you looked as the professor quickly produces a bag in front of you
you proceed to empty the contents of your stomach into the bag
anne frowns at this, "it's a vomiting valentine! it's a nasty thing you usually send to someone who broke your heart on valentine's day!"
"quickly, miss sallow," professor ronen instructs, "please take her to the hospital wing!"
this time, it was sebastian's turn--appearing greener than a frog.
"sallow, what have you done?" ominis hisses, "i thought you said this would work!"
"the dwarves worked, didn't they? they must have picked up a different package, she wasn't supposed to get the vomiting valentine!"
"you oaf!" the gaunt boy huffs as he and sebastian follow you and anne out of the classroom and to the hospital wing, ignoring professor ronen's shouts
-
thankfully, nurse blainey is able to solve your...valentine's malady
ominis, however, is so consumed by guilt, and in his head he just keeps regretting having asked sebastian for help
so when he and seb find you recovering in the hospital wing, he's relieved
and he decides that this should be the time to apologize
"some valentine's, huh?" you smile at them
in seb's quest to ask for ominis' forgiveness, he manages to drag his sister away from the hospital wing
you smile at them and wave, before turning to ominis, who looks stiff as a board, "ominis, are you alright?"
his voice is hard, "you got hurt."
you gesture to yourself, "this? oh it was nothing," you wave your hand to dismiss it
"no," he replies, "you got hurt...because of m- some stupid, stupid valentine's day prank. and you got embarrassed by those dwarves too."
you can see how much this is affecting ominis, so you try to reach for him, settling for his hand
you pull him closer to you, telling him to sit beside you on the bed, "i'll move over, sit here with me"
ominis hums, and sits beside you
"it's all sebastian's fault"
you turn your head to look at him, confused, "seb?"
"yes, he ordered those dwarves...they must have switched the package with the vomiting valentine"
hearing this from ominis kind of deflates you, and you unconsciously turn away from him
"oh...sebastian did those for me? does he...like me?"
ominis gapes in shock, eyebrows raising, "no! i mean...yes, he did all those...but he doesn't like you! he doesn't hate you either...i just meant--"
he sighs, "i asked him for help on what to give you for valentine's day...so this was all his idea. i thought...you'd like these grand gestures and--"
"wait," you perk up, smiling. ominis can hear the joy in your voice, "you...like me?"
now it's ominis' turn to look in your direction, head tilting in curiosity, "yes, of course. are you really so oblivious?"
you laugh, in shock, in relief, as you clutch his hand happily. "i guess i am. but even with the dwarves and the vomiting valentine, this day is still good."
"what makes you say that?"
you blush, mustering the courage to lean in and rest your head on his shoulder. he smells good, feels warm, safe. "well, because i just found out the person i like likes me back."
ominis hums happily at that, visibly relaxing.
you two don't say anything else, but you quietly relish in each other, his hands wrapped around yours
and slowly, he rests his head on top of yours, feeling your breathing becoming even
and ominis closes his eyes, taking in your scent, thinking, "yes, perhaps today wasn't so bad after all."
the twins come to check on you two in a while, and sebastian sighs in relief when they see you two resting, with your head on ominis' shoulder and his head resting on top of yours.
all's well that ends well
until...
"you won't be getting away with this, sebastian," ominis calls out.
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arminsumi · 8 months
Note
omgg i love ur writing broo it has my giggling, kicking my feet n shi and the fact that u also do fem black readers OMG I LOVE U anyways putting my appreciation aside, what abt nerdy freaky armin (if u havent already ofcc) like u cant tell me that man is FREAKYY (i ❀ freaks)
˗ˏˋ꒰ 🍒 ꒱
đ…đ«đžđšđ€
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A/N: you are the cutest patoodiest 💗 mwa thank u sweetiepie! and ur absolutely right UR ABSOLUTELY RIGHT!! yk what they say it's alwaysss the quiet nerdy ones!! đŸ„°
Pairing: ARMIN Arlert x f.reader
Summary: Min's the nerdy valedictorian with a freaky side đŸ„°
Warnings; 🔞 mdni, SMUT, this isn't fully proofread 👀, sub.Armin/some light dom.Armin, stereotypes (nerd, popular girl), mean reader, dirty talk, public sex (library, during class), facial, handjob (reader giving), oral (reader giving), light humiliation/degradation, bondage (blindfolding, tying hands), mean names (freak, loser), creaming in his pants, hair pulling kink, slapping kink, begging, toys (vibrator), use me kink (or whatever it's called), lmk if i missed some i was in a freaky state of mind while writing lmfao
â™Ș spice up your life come and get a freak
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Min is the quiet blond boy that sits next to you every chance he can get. He follows you like a puppy from class to class, trying his best to interest you — the pretty popular girl of his wet dreams — with every nerdy topic that comes to mind.
Yes he's blabbing your ear off about the importance of maths, but really he's thinking about what what color panties you wear. Do you prefer lace or plain? What's your favorite position? Do you prefer backshots? Missionary? Full Nelson? Mating press?
You wouldn't suspect the school's valedictorian to have such a nasty mind.
He just can't wait 'till you give him a taste. He knows you will 'cause he's been so good to you, always helping you study for tests and even taking notes for you when you're skipping class. He's been such a help.
The first time is his fantasy come true; you jerked him under the desk during a lecture. He shuddered n tried to focus on what the professor was saying, but how could he with your fingers wrapped so tightly around his pulsing cock? :( The poor boy came in his pants and enjoyed every second of it, even when he had to embarrassedly excuse himself after class to 'tend to an emergency'.
He loves when you make his glasses fog up from how hot his face is and how heavy he's breathing. He loves when you make them slide down the bridge of his pretty nose, mouth hanging open while you make out with his cock in the library.
That all started because he asked you "can you k-kiss my cock?"
Now he melts and falls apart, desperately muffling his moans by biting down on his thin textbook. When he's close he grabs a fistful of your hair n tugs your head back, pulling you off his cock with a sloppy pop — starting to jerk himself over your face.
"C-can I cum on your face?" he pants, already deciding that he would regardless of what you say. He had to see his milky white cum painting your face.
"Oh? You're a fucking freak," you giggle sweetly, sending a rush through his body, "Of course you can cum on my face."
He absolutely folds when you call him a freak. He lives for the moments you expose his kinks, too.
Of course he's into bondage, why wouldn't he be 🙄 he loves using a neat silk tie as a blindfold... on himself, not you. He squirms and whines and pleads, "Let me see you, please."
Don't forget to cuff him to your bed and milk him nicely!
If you wanna get him achingly hard and sensitive for you, you gotta degrade him :( call him a freak, call him pathetic, call him a loser, humiliate him for cumming in his pants, tell him he's your toy.
And if you wanna make him cum loads then you should consider indulging in his slapping kink — his hair pulling kink — everything. He just wants the popular girl to pull his hair while she rides his cock like a toy.
"Please please please use me — use my cock like your toy n' call me a loser again. Please! Mmm yes yes yes I'm pathetic for you, Y/n ~ " he has the cutest high pitched moans.
He also begs you to use your vibrating toys on his cock :( <3
Speaking of begging... he is always, always begging. Pawing at your skirt to get your attention, eyes pleading for you to sneak off with your favorite loser so you can squeeze in a quickie before class.
Poor nerdy Armin just wants you to fuck him 'till his glasses slip right off, 'till his cock hurts, 'till you wring him dry of all his cum — is that too much to ask for?
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urdepressedslut · 9 months
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I don't know if you usually take requests, but could you please write a drabble about Bucky taking care of the reader during her period? Period cramps are killing me and I just want some cuddles đŸ„ș
aw i love this đŸ„č i’m sorry your cramps have been bad, i’m sending you all the love and hugs your way💗 i hope this bucky fluff makes you feel better đŸ„°
Cuddles
♡ Pairing: tfatws!Bucky Barnes x Fem!Reader
♡ Summary: Bucky helps comfort you when you are having bad period cramps.
♡ Warnings: SUPER FLUFFY, light angst, period cramps, blood (duhhh), light self hate
main masterlist
* i know this is mickey, but let’s pretend it’s post tfatws!bucky *
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You had showered after a long day, doing your usual routine— taking your time to really treat yourself after a tough week.
Immediately after sinking into bed, the sheets feeling so good against your freshly shaven legs— it took no time at all for you to slip into a much needed slumber. You didn’t know you could sleep so soundly, so well. Most nights consisted of rolling and waking up occasionally in sweats. Tonight was the first, as you slept through the entire night, waking only the next morning.
You were excited to start off your Saturday after a good nights rest, except when you went to get up— you noticed you were still exhausted. It was then you could feel your back ache, all your limbs heavier than usual. You furrowed your brows in confusion, thinking perhaps you had gotten too much sleep. But as you swung your legs over the edge of the bed, you suddenly felt something wet in between your thighs.
Glancing down, ripping the cover off— everything dawned on you at the sight of red smearing the inside of your thighs, your underwear ruined.
Fucking periods.
You knew getting that good of sleep was too good to be true. You could feel the tears working their way up, your nose burning with frustration. You had just cleaned and changed all your sheets, taken a shower. Now everything, including you were dirty again— like you had never done any of the cleaning to begin with.
You knew it was just your emotions running wild, so you willed your tears to stay away. Sucking in a deep breath, you walked to the bathroom sluggishly. You made it your mission to grab a pill before the cramps started— you had learned your lesson. Although you were starting your period, you were not going to let this ruin your weekend. You were going to have a nice relaxing weekend. Not letting the beauties of being a woman ruin your day.
If only you had kept that attitude up for the entire day. The cramps had come as you expected, but this time the pill did nothing to relieve the pain. The heating pad worked only for a few minutes before the pain came crashing in waves, your body attempting to curl in on itself from the discomfort.
You swore a ghost was digging a knife in your uterus, and right now— you’d appreciate if the ghost just ripped out your uterus completely.
You had holed yourself up in your room, only making it downstairs for breakfast before you were running back to your bathroom to empty the contents of your stomach back out. This was definitely one of the worst periods you’d had in awhile, and you just wanted to slip into a coma until it was over.
Knocking sounded from your door, and you rolled over still clutching your stomach. You looked a mess, you felt like a disaster. Periods always made you feel gross.
“Yeah?” You asked out loud, and you couldn’t hide the discomfort from your tone.
“(Y/n)? You okay?” Bucky asked through the door.
Your eyes widened at his voice, wondering what he was doing here.
You and Bucky had been dating for awhile now, and things had been great. You still managed to get flustered by practically anything he did— and he loved every second of your flustered state. There was one thing that was brought up though— and that was periods.
“Uh— yeah I’m fine! Just tired!” You shouted, nervous that he could sense your lie. He definitely could.
It’s not that you thought he’d judge you for being a woman and having a period. But you were shy to show him that vulnerable side of you. Both you and him had shown the soft sides of each other— clinging to each other when you needed each others comfort. But there was something extra vulnerable about this— and you couldn’t ignore the embarrassment you felt when you even thought of it. You didn’t want him to find you gross, or annoying as you whined.
Okay
 I guess you were a little nervous that he’d judge you.
“Doll what’s going on? Can I come in?” He asked, his voice growing more concerned.
You pulled the cover over your legs, giving the room one last once over— it didn’t look terrible. You just wished you could have a minute or two to tidy up. You knew Bucky very well though, and he’d break the door down if you waited one more second.
“Of course, come in!” You announced finally, taking a deep breath, hoping a cramp didn’t hit you while he visited.
The door opened and Bucky peeled his head in first, after making eye contact with you— he sent a warm smile before heading all the way in, shitting the door behind him. He quickly made his way to the bed where he plopped down, looking over you concerned.
“Baby what’s going on? I feel like I haven’t seen you much today. You sure you’re just tired? You aren’t getting sick are you?” He rambled on, and your heart swelled at his concern.
“Buck— I’m fine really. Just didn’t sleep too good last night.” You completely lied, last night was the best sleep you had ever had. Too bad it leaked into today though.
He furrowed his brows and looked at you like he was about to figure you out— see right through you and pick out the lies. You wouldn’t be surprised if the serum gave him those abilities.
“You know you can tell me anything, right?” He asked softly, scooting closer so he could slip his hand underneath the covers to land on your bare thigh.
It was meant to be a comforting gesture, but you feared you’d get blood on him. You knew that was a silly thought— but you were paranoid.
He noticed you tense up from his touch and immediately he removed his hand, his face growing more concerned.
“Baby, what is it?” He pried, trying to look you over again— needing to know what the cause of your discomfort was.
You sighed and gave in, shoulders sagging in defeat. You didn’t want him to worry, and seeing his frantic eyes search you for a wound— you realized you were making this bigger than it needed to be. You just couldn’t ignore the embarrassment you felt.
“It’s just uh
 I’m
 I’m on my period Buck.” You mumbled, lowering your eyes to the bed.
His concerned expression melted away, his heart falling back into a regular rhythm. He knew he was prehistoric— but he knew what a period was. He just didn’t know why you wanted to hide it from him.
“Oh.” He finally said, “Doll— you can tell me things like that.”
“I know Buck but
 it’s embarrassing and gross. I can usually deal with it and nobody ever notices— you know because it’s a normal thing.” You told him, playing with the edge of the comforter. “This one has just been pretty bad and
 I just— I don’t know.”
You trailed off, avoiding his gaze. Bucky reached his hand over and tucked some stray hairs behind your ear. Tracing his fingers down your jaw to raise your chin up— that way he could look into your eyes.
“You’re not gross, okay? I’m sorry you’re in pain baby— I wish I could take it all away. It’s not fair you have to deal with this all the time.” He told you gently, and you leaned into his touch.
“It’s not usually this bad but
 I don’t know, I guess it’s just a bad one this time around.” You assumed.
Before you could say anything else, you doubled over as the pain came back— stabbing into your uterus. You clutched your lower abdomen— hoping it would help relieve the pain. Bucky’s eyes widened at your whine.
“What can I do to help?” He rushed out, hands hovering over you.
If it were any other time, you’d find his protective, mama bear mode adorable. But for now— you were too busy being in pain.
“Just stay with me please? I don’t wanna lay here alone.” You admitted, your words coming out in whimpers.
Bucky wasted no time in kicking his shoes off, shimming his jacket off before he crawled back into the bed, sneaking under the covers. He leaned back against the headboard, pulling you on top of him.
“Don’t even have to ask doll, I’m staying right here. You comfortable?” He asked.
You reached down and raised your shirt just above your belly button, before you lifted his shirt the same. He furrowed his brows, wondering what you were doing. You laid down completely again, letting your skin smush against his, and because he was a super soldier and was always hot— his warm stomach felt amazing against your lower abdomen. Like a personal heating pad.
“Ahh
 that feels good. You’re so warm.” You sighed, ticking your face into the crook of his neck.
He chuckled and smiled into your hair, wrapping his arms protectively around you.
“I love you baby.” He whispered to you, already feeling your breathing even out— falling asleep on him.
Your uterus calmed for now, the warm sensation soothing your pain. You could only wait until the next wave of pain came— but you knew you’d be okay with Bucky holding you.
“Love you too Buck.” You mumbled sleepily against his neck, your breath warming his skin.
He hated that you were in pain, wishing that he could take it all away— but he’d give you as many Bucky cuddles as you needed until you were sick of him.
Truthfully, you’d never get sick of Bucky cuddles.
A/N: short but sweet đŸ„°
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grimoireofhayley · 9 months
Text
Of Friends and Horror
Stu Macher x Fem!Reader x Billy Loomis
WARNINGS: Graphic content, eventual Smut (MINORS DNI), Language, Talks of SA, Cheating, Obsessiveness, Gore, 18+ Content, Stalking, Possessiveness, Dirty talk
Word Count: 1.7k
Tag List: @ev3ningrain @nerdytif @fanfic-enjoyer123
A/n: I had so much fun writing this part! Quick reminder, it’s based on the Scream 1996 movie so there will be a lot of the plot in it 🙂 Let me know what you think of this chapter down in the comments below đŸ‘‡đŸ» criticism is also appreciated, but don’t be too harsh lol. It just leaves room for more improvement, and if you want to be added to the taglist let me know below đŸ„° Lastly, it’s also my first time writing a smut-like scene, so hopefully it isn’t too cringe
 I haven’t proofread yet, but I’ll be doing that as it’s published and I’ll make changes as I go. Thank you for reading! I’m excited to see where this series will go!
All chapter links! đŸ‘‡đŸ»đŸ‘‡đŸ»đŸ‘‡đŸ»
OF&H Masterlist
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Chapter 5
The landline rang and rang, interrupting your peaceful slumber. You groaned, slowly sitting up on your couch, sinking into the black cushions, tossing the fuzzy-dark purple blanket to the side.
“What the?” You murmured, half awake. You groggily rubbed at your eyes, attempting to get rid of any sleep that lingered.
You glanced at the blinking red and bold numbers that flashed across the alarm clock that sat quietly on the couch-side table; indicating that it was now 10:30pm.
School had ended several hours ago, so who could possibly be calling?
‘Hmm, maybe it’s Sidney calling to apologize.’ You thought, jokingly, knowing that she’d never do that.
“Alright, alright. I’m coming!” You moaned, annoyed at the frequent ringing that seemed to get louder and louder.
Pushing yourself off of what was your comfortable ‘bed’, you trekked to the kitchen where your landline was blaring.
You picked up the black phone, placing it against your ear.
“Ugh, hello?” You asked.
No answer, but you heard heavy breathing on the other side. “I said, hello?” You narrowed your eyes, leaning up against your marbled-kitchen counter.
“Hello
” A man spoke, his voice was odd, but eerily beautiful sounding. “Who is this?” He asked, and you tapped your fingers against your cheek, somewhat pissed.
“I should be asking you that.” You retorted, “But I’ll bite, who are you trying to reach?” You were genuinely curious to know because it’s not often you get phone calls like this, you should probably help in some way or another, right?
“What number is this?” He asked yet another question, ignoring what you had already asked.
You scoffed, he’s playing games, that you can tell.
“Why don’t you look at your caller ID and see?” You snipped, not in the mood for any pranks.
“I could do that, but why don’t you tell me?”
“Ah, no thanks, I assume you have eyes. You can do it yourself.” You mumbled, “What I can tell you, is that you have the wrong number.”
“Do I?”
“Yeah, no shit. It happens, though. Take it easy.” You huffed, hanging up.
You went to walk to the front door, but your telephone started to ring again, you turned on the soles of your feet, starting your journey back to your previous spot.
“He wants to play games, fine, I’ll play.” You gritted your teeth, picking up the bulky phone again.
“Hello?”
“I’m sorry, I guess I dialed the wrong number.”
It was the same guy.
“And you dialed it again, because?” Your attitude rises with each word you speak.
“To apologize.”
Smooth

“Okay, you’re forgiven, bye..” You sighed about to hang up again.
“Wait, wait, don’t hang up!” He quickly spoke.
“What is it?”
“I want to talk to you.”
You smiled, your mood drifting from annoyed to intrigued. You are somewhat enjoying this now, but you didn’t know why. Maybe it had something to do with his voice; it was attractive and husky sounding, almost hoarse. Voices like that always had you in a chokehold, the gruffness could and would send you spiraling, maybe that is why Steve was able to charm you so easily.
“They’ve got over 500 numbers for that.” You chuckled, “But I’m honored you chose this house to annoy
 but I really should be going now.” You fibbed, hanging up.
You walked to the front door to make sure it was locked, thankfully it was.
Your basic horror-movie instincts kicking in.
Peaking through the eyehole, you looked around to see if anyone was dawdling around.
Ring
 ring, ring

There’s that damn phone again.
You headed back to the landline, brushing your hair out of your face, and placed the object against your ear for what seemed like the millionth time.
“Hello.”
“Why don’t you want to talk to me?” He sounded upset.
‘Does this guy ever let up?’ You asked yourself.
“Alright, who is this?” You nagged.
“Tell me your name, and I’ll tell you mine.”
“I don’t think so.” You unraveled the phone’s cord, walking towards the fridge, opening it and grabbing a bag of chips, which made a crinkling sound.
“What’s that noise?”
“Oh, sorry, I was grabbing chips.” You giggled, not meaning to apologize to a complete stranger about grabbing chips, it was a dumb thing to apologize for.
“Chips? I only ever eat chips during a movie
” He prolonged the word movie, making it last longer than it should.
“Huh, maybe I should put one on
” You said out loud, insinuating that it was a good idea, it’s not like you will be sleeping tonight, anyways. You had a 6 hour nap today, hence why you woke up so late. You’d probably still be sleeping right now if this strange person hadn’t called you.
You debated whether you should or not watch a movie, but decided that you would in the long run.
“Really? What movie?”
“I’m thinking of a scary movie.”
“You like scary movies?”
“Uh-huh..” You smirked, biting the tail end of your thumb nail.
“What’s your favorite scary movie?”
“Halloween
 easily. Something about a tall-masked man that stalks his prey, almost like a game of cat and mouse, turns me on..” You blubbered, the smirk never leaving your face.

Silence

“I’d watch that over a good porno any day.” You admitted, inadvertently getting yourself turned on, Michael Myers, was easily someone you’d try to escape just by fucking him; in your rules of Fight, Flight or Fuck, you’d go with fuck, even if it got you killed for trying.
It’s a peculiar thought and probably something you should get help with; especially if it involves wanting to fuck a slasher of all things, but no one needs to know, well, minus that this complete stranger now knows it.
The person on the other end was completely flustered and not expecting what you had said, usually his victims fall prey to these little games, and he finds out more about them during the process, making it easier to get into their home. However, with you, despite already knowing you, he didn’t know that

You’re a slasher-fucker.
“Hello?” You spoke, bringing the unknown male back to reality.
“Really now?” He sounded flabbergasted, “Do you usually tell strangers this fact about yourself?” He teased.
You laughed, “No, I don’t actually. You’re the first, not even my best friend knows that dark fact about me.. Billy he’s—“ You stopped yourself, not meaning to blurt out his name, what if this was the killer?
You coughed awkwardly into your hand, changing the subject. “What’s your favourite scary movie?”
“Guess
” He taunted, but his head was elsewhere, ‘Huh, so I know something about (Y/n) that Billy doesn’t
’ He grinned behind his mask, feeling a bit of triumph.
“Umm, A Nightmare on Elm Street?” You uttered in his ear, bringing him back with the lull of your voice.
“Is that the one where the guy has knives for fingers?”
“Yeah, Freddy Krueger.” You gleamed, another Slasher you’d like to get your hands on as sick as you are, too bad he was also fiction.
“Freddy, that's right. I liked that movie, it was scary.”
“Really? I didn’t find it that scary.”
“So, you got a boyfriend?” He asked, changing topics. “Or is it just Michael Myers you’d love to have?” He rambled, a hint of lust hanging off a thread in his words. He was enjoying this too much, the fact that you’re probably just as twisted as him was enough to send his mind into the gutters, God, did he ever want to feel your cunt around his shaft; just knowing you’d probably let him fuck you because he’s a masked killer was giving him another hard one. He couldn’t help but reach under his cloak and start rubbing one out as he watched you from a distance.
You giggled again, completely enamored. “Why? You wanna ask me on a date?” You taunted, bending over the counter again, resting your chin in the palm of your hand. Your silk-black night gown, riding up your thigh, revealing more of your skin and your pink undergarments during your movement.
Unbeknownst to you, this caused the Watcher to struggle.
“Maybe. S-So, do you have a boyfriend?” He stuttered, not meaning to, as the pressure of his gloved hand shifted up and down faster and faster. It felt too good, and your voice was edging him on, getting him closer to his summit.
The cloaked figure rutted into his hand as his hot seed filled his palm. ‘F-fuck
’ he thought, jerking his hips as he finished his climax.
“Mm, no.”
“You never told me your name.” He grumbled, cleaning himself up, tucking his dick back into his pants.
“Why do you wanna know my name so bad?” You questioned,
“‘Cause I want to know who I’m looking at.”
You froze, becoming spooked. You gulped, “W-What did you say?”
You waited for him to speak, but all that was heard was silence, “Hello—“
You were cut off mid sentence by your doorbell ringing and you snapped your head up in that direction, you hung up immediately.
You placed the phone face down on the counter, walking over to your door. You looked out the peephole, seeing that no one was there.
Swiftly, you unlocked your door, hesitantly opening it, poking your head out, trying to get a better look outside, but all that was there was your car and a few stray animals scattering about.
You stepped out, but your foot had hit something. You jumped back, looking down.
There was a pink-coloured box with a red ribbon tied around it and a note.
You quirked a brow, picking it up. It was on the heavier side, but not completely.
You walked back to the kitchen gently placing it down on the counter next to your phone, carefully taking the note off and reading it out loud;
“You look so pretty when you’re spooked, especially in that little-black nightgown you’re wearing right now
” You gasped, your legs beginning to tremble in fear as your hands shook, but you roughed it out, wanting to finish the rest of the note, soon fearing the worst. “I brought you a little something from your ‘boyfriend’ Steve
 Signed, G.F.”
“What
 What the fuck?” You grimaced, putting the note beside you.
Gulping, you ripped the ribbon off and opened the box. Only for it to reveal another medium-sized box, you took that out, placing it outside of the other one.
You were quick to notice the red-splotches and felt the wetness of it. You shakily opened a drawer, and took out a kitchen knife, and cut the box open.
Your eyes widened as tears glossed over them, you dropped the knife to the ground and it cladded with the tiles as it seemed to have bounced in slow motion. You cupped your mouth, wanting to scream, but nothing came out, just silent whimpers as you looked at the human heart that laid in the box.
The phone rang again, causing you to twitch at the sudden sound.
You didn’t bring it to your ear this time, but you still heard that voice loud and clear.
“I hope you like your gift, (Y/n).”
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whateverisbeautiful · 2 months
Text
♄ Ranking Richonne
#12: Kiss Of Life (S7E05)
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Ooh it’s called the Kiss of Life for a reason. đŸ€© No one does passion like Richonne. â€ïžâ€đŸ”„ This marvelous scene seriously has a hold on me and features my absolute favorite Richonne kiss (thus far 😏). The moment is just so good and mesmerizes me like no other. It's legitimately hypnotic. And that’s why, even tho Rick and Michonne barely speak in this scene, it absolutely makes my top 12. And you know the kiss is good when you have multiple favorite parts of it lol...
First, it’s important to note that it’s not just the kiss that makes me adore and appreciate this scene but how extremely meaningful this exchange is based on where Rick and Michonne are at during this part of the story.
This was one of the hardest and most depressing seasons for them as they wrestled with losing people they loved and then being expected to be Negan’s servants indefinitely. 
And during this Negan era, it’s one of the rare times when Rick and Michonne are on notably different pages about how to approach the situation. And while Michonne told Rick she’d try to accept this way of "life," it’s clearly eating away at her to just sit and let Negan torment her family.
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It’s eating away at Rick too, but with the love he has for tf, and especially for Michonne and his children, at this stage in the show he really feels like he’d rather suffer like this with them than fight and lose them.
This was such a tough time for them, and yet Rick and Michonne's love so heartily prevails with this special kiss. It's the definition of true love's kiss, if you ask me. đŸ€©
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So first, I always feel for Rick at the top of 7.05 when he’s talking to Carl, who is understandably frustrated and behaving coldly to his dad. All Rick wants is for his family to be okay, and they’re so clearly not okay right now, which you know weighs on him.
And I’m not the only one who feels for him because Michonne is of course also in the room for this Grimes family moment, and she seems to be really empathizing with Rick as well. 
So then Rick and Aaron walk out of the room, and Michonne follows and, again, shoutout Aaron for leaving to give Rick and Michonne a private moment lol. Cuz the moment was perfection. 😍 Like for real tens across the board...
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Rick and Michonne stand in front of each other, and Rick invites her to join them if she changes her mind. I love that he always wants her with him.
I remember even watching live, I could tell that Michonne wanted to go with him too, cuz magnets don’t part. But she’s of the mindset that she has to try and go out on her own to fight this for the both of them if he’s not ready to fight back yet.
Michonne quietly and compassionately says, "good luck" and even tho Rick is clearly sad and knows this could be a moment of distancing, he still wants to close the gap and at least hug her goodbye, which I appreciate. đŸ„°
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So he goes in for this hug, and whenever I think back to when I first watched this scene live, I just smile because I remember how excited I was that Rick was simply going to hug Michonne and maybe kiss her on the cheek or whatever it looked like he was about to do. But little did I know we were in for something...
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Because as he goes in for this cute husband-off-to-work hug, Michonne stops him by gently placing her hand on his face. And I will forever love the choreography of this whole moment.
I love that it’s this moment of Michonne redirecting to let Rick know she wants to send him off right and make it crystal clear to him that even tho they’re going different ways right now, she is not upset with him, disappointed in him, or pulling away from him.
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So she warmly takes his face, and then there's this subtle moment where Rick does that signature Rick Grimes head tilt in her hands as he tries to assess what this moment is about.
You can see a heartbreaking split second of Rick seemingly wondering if this is her literally and figuratively pushing him away. And what most pains me is knowing Rick thinks he deserves whatever disappointment or distance Michonne might potentially feel toward him. 😭
His past relationship saw his former wife push him away during a very vulnerable time after he had to kill his best friend for trying to kill him, so it's like he's briefly expecting something like that again.
But one thing that wonderful woman Michonne is always going to do is let Rick know, this is different. đŸ™ŒđŸœ
It's the very thing Rick told Carl the literal morning after he and Michonne first got together - where homeboy didn't even want to wait a few hours before reassuring his son that he and Michonne are gonna be long-term. (which I always am just fully amused by that whole 6.11 scene btw. from rick lowkey forgetting he's talking to his son by emphasizing, "it just happened," carl's reaction to seeing his dad in a tizzy, and judith's 'office' look in the camera. gold 😂. michonne's fam is the cutest, y'all)
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And "this is different" has remained an accurate way to describe the elevated love Richonne has with each other.
Because see, now Rick isn't with a love in his life, he's with the love of his life. He's with the one (& only 👑). This is his unequivocal soulmate who will be by his side through any and everything. And I love that Michonne always manages to show Rick that he's met his match in a way he's never experienced before.
So thankfully Rick doesn’t have to ponder what this moment is about for long because Michonne quells any and all of those fears when she proceeds to kiss him with passion in an abundance. It’s utterly perfect. 😍😍😍
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No words needed, and she still manages to say everything. I still love you. I still crave you. And I’m still with you was expressed loud and clear. đŸ‘đŸœ
And Michonne really is such a commendable queen for doing this and making sure no wedge was created between her and her husband. This kiss really made any distance they had prior disappear, and it so beautifully let Rick know he is still cherished and appreciated by his wife.
He needed this moment more than he could probably even express. But of course, without even having to say it, Michonne knew this was needed because she always knows her man. 😊
This moment also feels like something she's been wanting to do since that fateful and scary night in the line-up where there were several times she could've lost him.
Like you know the fact that Rick is still with her and they're still alive, is something she's grateful for and doesn't take for granted. So she needed this moment too. And this kiss lets everyone know that while Negan may have nearly broken their spirits, he can never break their love.
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The level of passion in this kiss is great for many reasons, but especially because you know after the lineup Rick and Michonne are now both so much more aware of how quickly things can go fatally wrong and how whenever you leave home and part ways you really could not make it back home to each other. It makes me think about how Glenn left ASZ just to quickly retrieve Daryl, but then he never returned to their home again. 😱
So as Rick prepares to go off on this run with Aaron, he and Michonne really kiss like it could be their last because that's an unfortunate possibility. (even though not too much of a possibility since they're the ones who live, amen. 😌)
And then my absolute favorite part of this kiss is when Rick so clearly gets fully immersed in this moment with Michonne and pulls her closer to him. I freaking LOVE that little gesture of him pulling her into him. 😍 It felt like it was Rick's turn to also let Michonne know - I still love you. I still crave you. I’m still with you.
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Rick and Michonne just fit so perfectly together and I love the way they can always get lost in each other. Truly, in that moment for them, it felt like they were the only two in the world and all the other stuff didn’t matter. Their ability to be so present with each other is so special. đŸ„č
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And she was already so close to him but the fact that he pulled her even closer...Magnets. And then whoever pointed out that Michonne kisses his top and bottom lip is a real one because I never noticed it before, but now it’s my other favorite part of this moment. 😋
They were really wild for this whole kiss, y'all. It feels great to be so spoiled. And we're Blessed with a capital B that this ship is literally everything we could dream of. 😌
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This kiss is of course steamy and heavenly, but also it is just so powerful. For Rick and Michonne to be going through what they’re going through and feeling so differently about their current circumstances, it is so powerful that they close the gap rather than widen it. That they express authentic love for each other more than opposition.
This moment solidified that Richonne has what it takes to rise above anything and that even when they have entirely different opinions on a subject as big and serious as how to approach fighting for their lives and their people, they will still always be with each other. Wholly, Deeply, & Forever.
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Again, I so appreciate that Richonne always chooses each other. And also this kiss was only our second time seeing them kiss like this since their canon ep, and man did they deliver. Like...
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I’ve always felt that something so special about Richonne is that they are not like some TV couples who are more interesting in their pre-canon "Will They/Won't They" phase, and then when they finally do get together it doesn’t quite live up to all the steamy passion of their build-up.
With Rick and Michonne it’s a whole different story cuz moments like this kiss let us know that all that steamy passion and build-up was not only matched but topped when they were finally able to express the love they felt romantically. 
Also, when they lost Carl the following season, it was this kiss of life in s7 that I’d think about because I believe this is an illustration of what Michonne and Rick ultimately land on even amidst the toughest adversity. They land on love, which has proven true time and time again.
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And as always their moments after the kiss are also profoundly passionate as they look into each other's eyes and then do their signature thing of leaning their heads against each other, truly almost as if finding their center with each other.
I love that they stay in this moment awhile, again with no words necessary to communicate how much they love and are with each other. 
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They are the epitome of soulmates, and the way their love shined through in this quiet moment made that clear.
And then I love that Rick can’t help but express gratitude to Michonne for giving him his entire life with that kiss, so he fittingly says what he always finds a way to say to her, "thank you." The absolute cutest. 😊 You know Rick ain't been kissed like that ever before lol. Michonne has that man forever entranced, and I love to see it.
And the thing is, Rick has a special effect on Michonne too, cuz you can clearly see it in the way she looks at him as well.
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In one kiss Michonne and Rick were able to breathe life into each other and quiet all the worry of them being on the rocks. They might still have big differences at this point, but nothing will ever be strong enough to divide them.
(that's why when I hear lines like say, "we are the strongest military on the planet" or "we're the last light of the world," or whatever, my only thought is - and yet you're still no match for Richonne. đŸ’…đŸœ Rick and Michonne Grimes prove they're the ones who live and the ones whose love is unstoppable every time. đŸ‘ŒđŸœ)
So it was a big deal for Richonne to have this moment in 7A. I appreciate that Michonne knew her man needed to be lifted up and reminded just who he is to her, and she did just that like only she can. And as the kiss went on, Rick let her know he felt just as strongly about her.
This important kiss shows that Rick and Michonne’s love is unbreakable, and I treasure this scene as such an undeniably powerful moment between them. I love their love, and I will adore this Kiss of Life for life. 😌
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timidpumpkin · 10 months
Note
Can I get a reaction when reader want to go to carnival or other fun places and then they got lost and ended up at their own home
Is the reader going to escape or go back to their daddies TYSMđŸ€—
HiiiiđŸ„°đŸ„°đŸ„°đŸ’œđŸ’œđŸ’œ. I loved this idea sooo much and it really helped get me out of the writer's block funk I was in! It’s a litttle bit different from what you asked so I hope that’s okay and you still like it!! Thank you so so much, I loved writing this!!~~~~~💖💖💖💖💖
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(pictures are not my own)
Helpless (Stucky x reader)
Pairing: Dark!Stucky x f!reader
Warnings/tags: Dark!Stucky, Daddy!Stucky, Female reader, stockholm syndrome, forced age regression, mention of previous kidnapping, reader gets lost, mild injury to reader, Implied reader has small hands in comparison because Stucky is gigantic (fact), Angst, Fluff, Comfort. Reader baby-talks as well, Lots o' cute nicknames (as usual).
Word count: 4.1k
Tagging a few of the absolutely lovely people who have supported me this whole time. I love you and appreciate you all more than i can express. @haleyhunwritess @ppatricia34me @hoplessfussybambi @canyonmooncreations @sapphyslittlenook
P.S. i'm gonna start a tag list so lemme know if you wanna be added <3
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It was getting a bit cooler now. 
The previously bright day had been overtaken by navy shadows that bring nippy wisps of air that catch on your exposed arms, sending chills throughout you. 
“I told you we should have used the long-sleeved one,” Steve remarks to Bucky as he watches you make a tiny shiver.
Bucky rolls his eyes at him, knowing you were the one who insisted on this specific onesie when he dressed you this afternoon. With an eager look on your face, you held it up to him, proudly showing him how it would match perfectly with some leg warmers you found in your drawer. He couldn’t argue with that, not when your giddy smile and sweet eyes looked at him while holding it up as high as you could for him.
“Come here babydoll,” Bucky says, squatting down a bit to get closer to your level. 
You don't hear him for a second. Not even your numbed fingertips could distract you from the bright lights that reflect off your eyes. You’ve been watching the multicolored Ferris wheel since you got here. You wanted to go on it so bad. 
Thus far, you’ve only been allowed to play the ground games. Though, you can’t complain too much now that you’ve collected quite a load of new stuffies to bring home. You’d like to think yourself pretty talented at these games–maybe too talented. 
You’ve all but completely missed the harsh glares Bucky gives the poor workers when they tell you “awh too bad” when you miss the target, but then proceed to hand you whichever stuffed animal or toy you’d been wanting anyway. You’d turn around to your daddies, excitingly showing them your prize and proudly exclaiming “I won! I won!” and Bucky would always tell you how good of a job you did every time.
“Babydoll?” Bucky calls again, bringing you back to reality, his voice sweet, as if he’s teasing you a bit, knowing how much you've enjoyed this outing.
It was a tough call. Bringing you here. They knew how much you wanted to go. Ever since Peter babbled on and on about his trip to the carnival at his birthday party a few months ago, you’ve been begging them ever since. It’s not that they didn't want to take you. It could never be that. They just weren’t sure if it would be safe

“There’s all kinds of creeps at those things!” Steve argues to Bucky, turning around as if that’s the last word and final say about it. 
“I know. I know. But
she really wants to go. Plus
it’s not like we’ll ever let her out of our sight.” Bucky tries to reason, knowing it was something they would enjoy too. He has several fond memories of dragging Steve along with him through the bustling crowds of people just so he could play–and win–all the games he could, always asking Steve which prize he wanted before promising him he’d win it on the first try. Long before he knew of what true cruelties lived beyond their hometown, Bucky had already mastered the art of staring down unfair showmen who would poke fun at Steve’s then narrower figure.
Bucky just couldn’t help the almost giddy feeling he got just at the idea of holding you up high while you throw one of those balls with all your might to win some oversized stuffed animal that you’d undoubtedly insist on carrying on your own despite it being twice your height.
“We could even get one of those leash things,” he suggests, the idea popping into his mind like it’s the most brilliant thing, remembering how he showed the leashed froggy backpack he saw a while ago to Steve.
“It’s not just that,” Steve admits, brows furrowed as he sits on the edge of the bed, a sad and worried look overtaking his features that makes Bucky want to cave to anything he’d ask. “what if
” he trails off, not meeting Bucky’s gaze, “what if
she tries to run off?” he says quietly as if the fear itself would be brought to life if he spoke it too loudly. 
It had been a long while since you tried to run away. All things considered, you seemed to be fully adjusted now. Every so often you would act up, but only in the way that all little girls would every now and then. They would always punish you appropriately, the way all good daddies would, reminding you that your life with them is your life, and that the horrid life you had before you was one never meant for a sweet innocent little girl like you. 
They saved you. Steve routinely reminded you as such, but he didn’t have to. Bucky could tell you knew it was true now just by the way your bright eyes greeted them every morning. You knew that you were only good and safe with them to take care of you. His little girl couldn't even function without them now. It was exactly how it was supposed to be.
Bucky thinks for a moment, walking closer to Steve and kneeling on the floor in front of him. He pushes his way into him, maneuvering himself between Steve’s legs, and scoops his distressed hands into his, kissing them both before looking back up to Steve. 
“She won’t.” he says, thick air questioning if it's true. 
But his words say more than just that. The meaningful look in Bucky’s eyes tell Steve that no matter what, they’ll always have you. And that there was no way you could get away from them. Bucky knew it wasn't just the fear of physically losing you, but the fear of hurt that they would feel if you even tried. 
Steve smiles a bit, his hands pulling Bucky up so that he’s now standing between his legs. He takes his hands, sliding them down from Bucky’s sides to his hips where they rest for the moment. 
“Alright,” Steve sighs, looking up to Bucky, and pulling him a bit closer by his belt loops, “but any sign of trouble, we leave” Steve states, seriousness in his tone, the same kind of voice he uses when they’re on missions together. 
“As if it would be any other way.” Bucky remarks, a smirk teasing his face as he dips his head down a bit to meet his lips with Steve’s. Steve sighs into his kiss, feeling the tension leaving his body just by Bucky’s stable words and secure presence.
“You think too much Rogers” Bucky teases after breaking from the kiss, thinking of all the times Steve would try to worm his way out of Bucky having to go on a mission with him in fear of his partner getting hurt–whether it be mentally or physically–Steve couldn't bare the thought of having to see Bucky like he was when he saw him for the first time in this new world. 
“Can’t help it,” he breathes, Bucky never ceasing to take his breath away from his all-encompassing kisses. “I love you two more than anything,” he says earnestly as if it’s the only known fact in the universe. 
“I know” Bucky smiles, “I know.”
“Oh-sorry Daddy!” you turn around, not meaning to ignore him. He holds out a sweatshirt and you instinctively hold up your arms so he can help put it on you. “Did you see the Ferris wheel Daddy?” you ask excitingly for the third time that night. Bucky chuckles a bit. 
“Yes, I did,” he answers as if it’s the first he’s hearing about it while putting some soft-knitted mittens he had in his pocket on your hands. “M’not sure if Dada heard though,” he whispers to you, “maybe you should go tell him,” he informs you with a wink. 
You hurriedly run over to Steve, jumping in place over and over again in front of him. 
“Dada! Dada!” you take his hand and drag him a bit closer to where you had the best view of the colorful wheel. “Look!” you point and turn to him with an excited expression. “Can we go? Please? Pretty please? Please please please please-” you babble over and over again while continuing to jump up and down until you’ve all but run out of air in your lungs. 
Steve looks at the contraption suspiciously, not trusting of the achy-sounding metal, and certainly not wanting his little girl near anything dangerous. He catches a glimpse of Bucky though, who’s contagiously smiling at you both, and remembers how often Bucky tells him not to worry so much. 
“Okay-okay” Steve caves, unable to help but smile at your hyper manner right now. “Just this once, then we can go home and get you all nice and warm” he teasingly pinches at your cold cheeks.
“Yayayay!” you literally scream out, not even caring one bit that he said it was only once or that you had to go home after this. You were more than overjoyed that you got to ride it at all. 
You start to make a sprint for it, only getting a few feet when resistance yanks you back, stopping you in your tracks and forcing you to steady yourself from the unexpected halt in momentum. Steve hadn’t even pulled on the backpack at all, it was just your pure running and his not moving an inch that caused you to ricochet back a bit. It’s a wonder you didn't fall flat on your behind. 
“Heh-sorry!” you sheepishly laugh it off and wait patiently for them to catch up with you in basically two full steps for them. 
As you make the short walk to the diminishing line in the late hour, Steve stops to tie his shoe, occupying both of his hands. You swing your arms aimlessly around waiting for him to finish while looking around. 
As you mindlessly scan the area around you, your head does a double take as you recognize something. 
No–someone. 
You watch the stranger in confusion until the remnants of memory come back to you. It was a friend. But this person wasn’t Peter or Wanda
no. It was a friend from
before.
It disorients you, confusion washing over you and placing a pit in your stomach as your life before now was mostly forgotten and placed in a dusty cardboard box in the back of your mind’s vaults. 
You watch as they walk away, towards where you know leads to the parking lot. And as if something takes over you, you start following their footsteps, unhinderedly drifting away from where Steve and Bucky are. 
As you mindlessly follow, several feet behind, memories of your past life replay in your mind. They playback in black and white as if you’re watching one of those really old movies Steve likes to show you sometimes. 
Then you hazily remember when they first found you
took you. Emotions of how scared and confused you were overtake your mind. You remember how they kept you in the house, never letting you leave. 
“Sily girl, Dada can’t kidnap what’s already his,” Steve would tell you every time you’d harshly accuse him of kidnapping you. 
“No one can protect you like we can,” Bucky would shush you after one of his punishments when you had pushed too hard. “Daddy only does this ‘cause he loves you.” he’d brush over your already bruising skin before carefully wiping away the tears that he had ignored for hours before.
Some nights you’d wake from nightmares, the specifics of it not mattering when Steve would find you crying into your stuffie. He never hesitated to pick you up and let you weep into his shoulder. Always whispering that you were okay, that you were safe. 
“It’s okay angel, Dada’s here. You’re safe with me. I’ll always keep you safe. Always.” he’d repeat to you sincerely, holding onto you so tightly, as if the slightest loosening of his grip meant the very air around him would harm you.
To him though, it was true. Nothing could hurt you as long as you were in his arms. He’d carry you downstairs, where Bucky would tell you that nightmares didn’t matter “‘cause they aren’t real, doll
not like me and Dada.” he’d caress your warm cheeks while Steve fetched you some cold milk. They’d stay up with you as long as you needed, not even daring to shut an eye until you felt safe enough to sleep again.
And truthfully
you did. You did feel safe. 
Maybe it was strange
the way you sought their comfort
their touch
their love, when you fought it in the beginning. 
And you did fight
hard. 
But every retaliation you made only ended in harsh grabs. Every effort to push them away resulted in lacerated reminders. Every moment you spent denying what they told you only yielded unrestrained punishments. 
“My sweet girl
you’ll learn soon enough. Fighting us only makes it harder for you.” Steve would stroke your cheek through the bars of your crib. “All you have to do is listen to what we say. We know what’s best for you, angel.” he’d say before leaving you all tied up and alone for hours
sometimes days. 
And then, after you’d more than cried yourself dry, throat scratchy from lack of hydration, he’d appear to you, asking if you’d learned your lesson. Your body would somehow discover new tears as you’d plead with him, promising him you’d be a good girl. 
It’s then that he’d smile down at you so sweetly, lifting your limp body from its cushiony cage and shower you with endless affection. 
He’d drown you with attention, never allowing you to lift a finger. He’d clean you up with your favorite scented soap, and after you were all done, Bucky would present you with a new set of soft clothes they bought just for you for taking your punishment so so well. They’d play your favorite shows and message every sore spot on your tired body after ordering from your favorite type of take out, something you never even told them. There wasn’t a moment where they weren’t touching you in some way, dousing you with sweet words about how much they loved their beautiful helpless little girl. 
Helpless.
A word that reminds you exactly how you felt the very first time you bumped into Steve. All alone and scared, in a place that was dark and unfamiliar. You were lost then. 
Just like you were right now. 
You practically snap back into reality, the one where you’ve found yourself far away from the luminous festival lights and eerily close to where you can’t hear racket of activities anymore. It’s quiet, and you don’t even know where that funnily familiar person you were following went. Dread fills your insides as you realize you’re all alone. 
You turn around hastily, 
Anxiety fills your stomach as you rashly run in the opposite direction, before tripping on a wire that sends you spiraling down to the ground. You clumsily try to catch yourself, mittened hands harshly hitting the pavement, and asphalt slashes through your leggings, exposing the soft flesh of your knees to razor-sharp pain.
The sudden impact scares you, tears that were already forming from before start rushing out of your eyes. 
Instinctually, you cry for Steve. For Dada. But when after too many moments you don’t feel their comfort, you look around and remember they’re not there. Your heart pounds as people rush by seemingly unaffected by your fallen form. You swirl your head around looking for them and are instead met with the haunting image of your green leash’s end, its ghostly emptiness scorning you from where it lays.  
You cry harder, guilt and anguish now thumping alongside the throbbing in your chest that radiates to your body’s wounded limbs and you're pretty sure the only words coming out of your mouth are pathetic strings of ‘daddy’ and ‘dada.’
“There she is” Bucky spots you, both of them rushing over to you, distraught as they notice your scraped-up form. 
“Dada!” you cry, leaping towards Steve and wrapping your arms around his neck as he picks you up. You helplessly weep, not just from the physical pain but from the emotional strain your misplaced detour took you on. You cry for leaving them. You can't tell if it was on purpose, but you feel awful from even remembering your past life and getting so close to being lost.
“Fuck, angel. What happened?” Steve breathes, taking the scuffed mittens off your hands to examine you closer. 
“I-...I-” you try to speak through gasps of crying. They both question you on where you went and why you walked away. You barely manage to tell the story in broken sobs as to what truthfully happened. They listen intensively as you tearfully explain the details of what happened.
“But-but-I-I don’t wanna! Don’t wanna lose daddies! Don’t wanna! Didn’t mean t-to! I-I p-promise-I-I didn’t!” you stagger between breaths, gasping for air as your sob relentlessly in Steve’s arms. 
“Shh, hey-hey” Bucky caresses your head, directing your attention to him. “It’s okay, doll. It’s okay. You’re okay.” he consoles. Steve gently wipes your tears at the same time and helps in calming you. You look at them both through blurry vision and continue weeping apologies to which they both remind you that it’s okay. 
They were scared to death when they only took their eyes off you for a second and you were gone
but they found you, just like the first time. 
They bring you over to sit down on a bench so they can better help console you and check your injuries. Steve rummages through the backpack he was carrying to get a first aid kit, and Bukcy watches through tortured eyes as you miserably cry.
“Doll.” he tenderly tilts your chin up to him. Tearful eyes red from crying look up to him. “Daddy’s proud of you.” he states, earnestly, stern and true. It makes you cry harder though, with confusion written all over your face. Proud? How could he be proud when you almost thought about running away? 
“W-why?” you cry “I-I bad. bad!” you weep pitifully as you feel Steve cleaning your knees. 
“No angel. You’re not bad.” Steve states, only confusing you more, you were sure both of them would be upset with you
considering they had every reason to. 
“You know why?” Bucky asks, stroking your previously cold cheeks that have now been warmed by your tears. You shake your head no as more seemingly endless tears fall. “‘Cause you came back,” he says, wiping them as they come. “You came back to find us. That’s all that matters.” Bucky reassures you. 
It hurts, both his and Steve’s worst fear almost coming to life. 
But it didn't. 
And truthfully, no one understood that more than Bucky. He knew more than anyone what it was like to get confused. To see or hear something otherwise mundane that whips you back to a place where you feel out of control. 
The story you recanted to them rings all too familiar to him. It reminds him of shaky hands and paralyzed tongue that attempted to explain to Steve what it was like to not be in control of your own body. Your own actions. 
It didn’t matter that you wandered away. It didn’t matter where your thoughts went. All that mattered was that you cried for them. All that mattered was your tiny hands curled around Steve's shirt so hard he’d thought you’d hurt your own fingers. All that mattered was the way you pulled Bucky closer while weeping his name as he comforted you. 
All that mattered
was that you needed your Daddies.  
They both reassure as such in ways they knew you'd understand. Besides, it only made sense that their little girl would get confused sometimes. That’s what daddies are for. And you came back because you knew they always made the best decisions for you. And even if on the off chance that you hadn't
that really wouldn’t have mattered anyway either. They would always find their little girl because you belong with them. Always and forever.
“Which ones do you want little princess?” Steve asks you, offering a variety of colorful bandages in front of you. Your hysteria and their sweet strong words have all but distracted you from the pain of the scratches lacerating your knees. You point to the ones you like and Steve praises you for making “such a good choice babygirl.”
Bucky holds you close and lets you bury your head in his chest while Steve carefully puts them on. You feel guilt again when you notice that the soft mittens now have little scuffs and holes in them that match your pants. But Steve reassures you that it’s ‘no biggie’ and that they can always get you another pair. 
“How about Daddy and I get you some ice cream?” Steve suggests, knowing sweets was at least one way to cheer his sweet girl up. 
You sniffle, looking to him at the suggestion. 
“Ice cweam?” you say with a small voice “I-I wike ice cweam” you say softly, not meaning to slur your words. But you never did anyway, it always just happened beyond your control. 
“I think that sounds perfect, huh doll?” Bucky says lightheartedly and sweetly while picking you up from the bench and placing you in Steve's arms.
“Wif sprinkles toos?” you ask, rubbing your sore eyes. 
“All the sprinkles for my sweet little girl” Steve smiles at you while playfully poking at your side making you giggle a bit. 
The cold dessert cools your hot throat and brings a smile back to your face. Of course, what really made you happy was knowing your daddies weren’t upset with you, and even more importantly, that you were never going to lose them.
“Hey what’s that on Dada’s face?” Bucky points directly to Steve, making you turn to examine it closely as you're still in his arms. It gives Bucky the opportunity to steal a lick from your ice cream.
“Hey!” you laugh turning back to Bucky’s not-so-secret move when you realize there was nothing amiss on your Dada’s face. 
“What?” he puts his hands and shoulders up in a shrug of confusion while looking around and feigning confusion. You giggle more as obvious signs of ice cream are on the tip of his nose.
“Looks like daddy’s the one with something on his face” Steve teases, and you laugh with them while they let you finish your little treat.
“You still wanna go up on the Ferris wheel babygirl?” Steve asks after wiping your hands clean from any sticky residue. You look up to him with awe and shock, not expecting him to still offer it. 
“Really?” you question with a hopeful but weary look on your face from not being sure of why you deserve it. Steve nods at you and tells you yes. Maybe he was skeptical before, but nothing was better than seeing his little girl's face light up in a smile. 
Plus, Steve knew you were their little girl. More than that, he knew that you knew. In your heart, you came back to them. You needed them. And that’s all Steve could ever want. 
You’re squeezed between your two daddies as the wheel makes its way up to the top. They watch as you look in awe of how tiny everything looks from up above. This must be what it's like for your daddies to see all the time. You feel as though you’re at the tippity top of the wheel forever. You don’t mind as it’s beautiful and quiet up there with the only people in the world you wanted to be with. You tiredly lay your head against Steve's arm, signaling to him that you’ll likely sleep the whole drive home. 
“I love you,” you say contently, and they know you say it for both of them. 
“We love you too angel. So much,” Steve tells you, smiling down at his sleepy little girl, and looking up to see Bucky’s lightened up face too. 
He takes it all in, remembering the times when just he and Bucky would go out to these things–or really–when Bukcy would drag him to the carnivals. He knew how much Bucky loved this. He knew how much you loved this. And he loved it too. He loved you both, and that was all he needed.
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strongheartneteyam · 10 months
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Realize where you belong.
Pairing: neteyam sully x female!dreamwalker!reader/female!human!reader
Chapter 4
CW: jealous neteyam, angst, restless neteyam, obsessive and toxic behavior, mentions of violence, neteyam's current mental health is not the best out there (let's put it that way), the word "bloody" being mentioned in someone's thoughts, TRIGGER WARNING for dubious consent and slight NON CON, angry thoughts, melancholic reader, hints of depression on reader, anxious reader, mentions of breeding kink, reader thinking a lot about neteyam, reader finds out she's crushing on neteyam, reader is afraid of neteyam + attracted to him, neteyam stepping over reader's boundaries, creepy yandere vibes, slight nudity, sexual tension, neteyam almost trying to have sex with reader (if you squint)
Not proofread
 as always 😂 I'm so sorry PLS don't give up on me, my babies! My readers are my lil rays of sunshine! No false praising here, I'm way too much of an honest, and sometimes blunt bih to do that! Ahaha you guys have changed my life. Having you guys reading my stories, appreciating my art
 I'm still speechless. I love y'all until the end! đŸ„ČđŸ„șđŸ«€đŸ’• when I'm sad, you guys cheer me up with your comments, reblogs, asks, likes
 I'm forever thankful ✹ I'm sending A BIG KITH to everyone that commented on the other chapters! I didn't have enough time and mental/physical health to answer everyone bc I've been going through some tough things in my personal life lately. Like, REAL tough. But I always do my best to try and show my gratitude to all of you <3 hope you enjoy this chapter. Leave comments below if u wanna I LOOOOVE READING YOUR COMMENTS đŸ„°đŸ’•đŸ’•đŸ’•
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Chapter 3
ˏˋ°‱*⁀➷
Watching me, wanting me
I can feel you pull me down
Fearing you, loving you
I won't let you pull me down
Haunted (Evanescence)
ˏˋ°‱*⁀➷
Hours had passed since Neteyam Suli had appeared to you in the window of the kitchen you worked in.
It was late at night already and you should be sleeping but, you just could not stop thinking about what had happened. How weird it had been to see a real na'vi - not an Avatar - real close. How odd he looked in your eyes, massive in size and so, so blue...
You laughed alone in your small room in the back of the laboratory after taking a quarter of a second to realize that the thought you just had was actually really funny.
Neteyam looked like a huge and thick brushstroke of sky blue paint. Still, he was
 incredibly beautiful. He was eerie, weird looking compared to the human guys you're used to, but
 something about him made his face linger on your mind.
You did not know how it was possible that you were finally having to admit to yourself that you felt attracted to Neteyam Suli, even after he appeared to you only once and, let's not forget, he appeared completely unanticipated, saying he had seen you before, multiple times.
You knew that raised like a billion red flags. Yet still, even though you did not feel safe enough to trust him or let your hair down when he was around, he intrigued you immensely.
àŒŠâ€âž·
You woke up the next morning feeling anxious. You did not know what it was exactly, but, lately, you had not only been depressed, but anxious too. You knew you probably would be diagnosed with clinical depression and anxiety if you cared to go to the mental health department of the laboratory, but the thing was
 you did not care to. You did not want to. The real reason for your lingering sadness was already so familiar to you: you did not like the life you were living.
You looked to be free like the na'vi. To not have deadly boring obligations everyday, to not have to care so much about so many strict rules of what was socially acceptable and what was not. You thought your own race to be too complicated. Humans don't really say what they mean just so many times. Humans care too much about money and power when, in reality, deep down, we all know that's not what's gonna make us happy, what's gonna keep us warm in a cold night.
But you were never really like that.
Not to pretend you were a golden, precious jewel, so incredibly hard to find, so utterly different from everybody else but, in all honesty, as much as you did care about money and having a comfortable life - to some extent - you were never a greedy for riches kind of person. You had always felt perfectly happy and content to just have a few things to keep you cozy, like your earbuds, a good book, your favorite sweet treat
 You liked it simple. Calm. Balanced.
You believed that everything needs to be balanced to work well.
Chaos and light. Pain and happiness.
People need all of it to learn, grow and live a good life, that doesn't get painfully boring and unbearable with time.
But humans lacked balance.
Too much greed, too little contentment. Too much hate, too little compassion. Too much selfishness, too little altruism. That's why your kind was, as unfortunate as it was, doomed to misery. The human race dug their own grave. God, they couldn't even respect and take care of their own planet, their own home, the place that kept them literally safe and steady in the middle of the immense galaxy, let alone being able to take care of each other, to consider other's feelings before their own because, sometimes, we all need to do it.
And that's one of the reasons why you admired the na'vi so much. They were so much more wise than your own race.
How many times you had wished, talking to yourself in the dark of the night, that you could have been born na'vi. Why was fate so cruel to you? You did not even believe in fate. But it is only an expression, anyway.
àŒŠâ€âž·
Neteyam was tossing around on his mat since he went back home from training.
Yesterday he was way too busy to try and go see you or at least watch you from afar.
Sometimes he truly felt exhausted from his hectic routine and just wished he could be like Lo'ak and the other Omatikaya young men and just be able to relax more, to have more free time to engage in hobbies or, Eywa... to have more time to sleep... Sometimes he went back home all sore. He was as athletic as one can be but it did not mean he could not feel jaded after pushing himself too hard.
But Neteyam tried to always keep in mind the noble, sacred reason why he did all that. He was going to be the next leader of his clan, a privileged position, blessed by the Great Mother. A position that so many wished to have and he was lucky enough to be waiting to take on.
He was the current Olo'eyktan's son. It was a gift, he should not be ungrateful. He felt bad for thinking that was exactly what he was being... His father, Jake, was Toruk Makto. He was brave enough to earn that title. Neteyam felt it was his duty to be as brave and fearless as his father, to honor him and all his efforts to defend their tribe from any danger, specially from the Sky People.
Everything was going as usual, if it was not for only one thing: Lo'ak seemed to be suspicious of the fact that Neteyam was out for so many hours, almost everyday (meaning, every time he was free to just do whatever he wanted and not training to become the next Olo'eyktan of the Omatikaya) and nobody had a clue of where he was.
His parents seemed to be too busy being the Olo'eyktan and the TsahĂŹk to notice something seemed off about Neteyam's behavior lately. And it is understandable. It was anything but easy to be the clan leader and the clan healer and spiritual leader. Mo'at was getting old and had passed the position of TsahĂŹk to Neytiri a while ago. So, Jake and Neytiri already were making such a huge effort to be able to live up to their duties, be parents of a little girl, Tuktirey, three teenagers and still keep their sanity. It was a lot, indeed. But they tried as hard as they could to still be good enough for their clan, their family and for each other, as a mated couple.
Neteyam decided he was way too restless to be able to sleep that night. He could not stop thinking about the way that human male talked to you, looked at you... He wondered if he really was your mate. He was not sure but if what he thought when he saw you two together was true, he knew it would not be a problem. He hated to get violent, his natural self was calm and composed. But he was going to fight for you, and, if it needed to get bloody, then so be it.
He decided to go outside his and his family's home, to breathe some cold, fresh eclipse air. It helped him to calm down a bit but it was not enough. He missed you. Like crazy. Deeply. He craved your scent
 your delicious human scent. He did not even believe he was saying that about the way a human smelled. But he would always insist in saying you were different. You had a na'vi heart. Just like his father, back when he was still all pink and small.
He decided he wanted
 no, he needed to see you. And it could not wait. It had to be now. He craved you and that craving would not go away like that. It was stronger than his rational brain. You woke up his animal side more than anything else did. He wanted to mate with you as soon as possible. He dreamt about the day he would be able to breed you, have you carrying his offspring on your womb. He would make you so happy, give you everything you've ever wanted, everything you need. And while you were still not permanently living inside your Avatar body, he still wanted to have you, even if it meant having you in your demon form. You were a pretty, lovely demon. His cute, sweet demon girl. His yawntutsyìp. (little loved one)
àŒŠâ€âž·
You just could not believe it was really happening, how the hell you got into those circumstances.
Right before that moment, you were almost sleeping peacefully, finally (you know that state when you're not awake nor asleep?), after having been awake, tossing around on your bed for hours for the most ridiculous reason you could ever think of: you were undeniably crushing on that weird alien boy. Neteyam Suli.
Yes, he acted like a creep when he tapped on your window. You knew it was pathetic but
 he just would not leave your mind. He was shamefully living rent free in your brain. All cozy there.
But the worst and craziest part was: you were still afraid of him.
Ok, the na'vi were a peaceful, highly intelligent (arguably much more smart, interesting and wiser than humans) alien race but he was still almost 10 feet tall and was so freaking intimidating. You shivered at the thought that he could ever hurt you, even by accident, one day.
Still, you were now here with him. Outside the laboratory. Because he put his goddamn eerie but cute (the guy is a complete paradox) looking ocean colored fingers through the tiny gap you left open in your bedroom window - a passage you left for air to come in when it was really hot and dry, like it was that night - and that made a strange noise, enough to put you in alert mode.
Damn, what a bad habit
 Leaving the window open, even slightly, was not even permitted by the people who took care of the lab's security norms. That could be dangerous. But you had always been a stubborn little thing.
You were now regretting your decisions, though. 
Neteyam approached your window being what he could be like a pro: a crazy stalker.
How you were still attracted to him
 even though you were fearful of his na'vi build and strength
 that was a question that maybe a mental health professional could answer. It was weird and problematic and you knew it. But you never imagined you would feel like this about Neteyam Suli. You really did not. When you first saw him, he seemed cute and handsome in your eyes, but he was still an alien. You had never considered being attracted to one. But now
 nothing made sense anymore, things were getting weird.
Stupidity took over you when you were so sleepy and groggy and you saw it was his huge hand on the wooden window, so, you wanted to ask him why he ran away the last time you two spoke. You know when you're so sleepy, you make the most unimaginably silly mistakes? So
 there you go. You dragged your heavy with slumber body out of your bed, grabbed your oxygen mask that was kept inside your closet and opened the window.
But why, though?
In the beginning, you two were having a trivial talk about mundane stuff, like how he learned the English language (his father, of course), he started to ask how and why you got an Avatar etc 
He acted suspicious but still normal-ish, for a na'vi. They always looked mysterious when interacting with humans. But then, when he was telling you about his little sister, Tuktirey, and your eyes were slowly falling shut, your body begging for some hours of sleep
 you felt a change in the atmosphere around you.
Your eyes had closed for a while, on their own, and suddenly, you knew Neteyam was really close to you, now. He had been keeping a respectful distance in the beginning. But now
 now he was inches away from your body. He had moved closer, his fleshy but toned blue thigh almost rubbing against your leg, as you were sitting sideways on the window frame, your legs hanging in the air, making you feel a bit cold because of the nighttime Pandoran air.
You woke up from your 5 seconds long involuntary nap really startled.
"Hey! Why are you
 so close?" You looked at him, dazed and nervous, visibly shaken
"Sorry
 Is it too much? You're just
 so pretty
" Neteyam says, looking at you like he's looking at a graceful, otherworldly being.
"Yeah. It is." You warn him "Can you
 step away a bit, please?" You said, looking into his eyes. Your gaze serious but amiable.
Neteyam respected your request and did what was decent. But you did not expect that he would soon change his demeanor, just like something was taking over him.
You were so distracted with your chat with Neteyam but so utterly sleepy too that you did not notice when your nightgown's thin strap slipped through your right shoulder, leaving your breast exposed, your nipple out for Neteyam to see.
It was like a beast had replaced that nice-but-weird-vibes guy you were previously talking to.
Neteyam had just lifted you off of the window with amazing ease, your feet now touching the ground and he got closer to you again. He had you with your back against the lab's outer wall, keeping you there just by being in front of you, looking at you.
His size was enough to keep you still. You did not want him to maybe get mad at you if you tried to run away. That could become terrifying in a heartbeat. You were brave since a child, but you were also realistic. Your height and body strength was nothing compared to Neteyam's.
He looked at your exposed breast with such desire, you felt like his amber gaze was scorching your sensitive skin.
"Neteyam! What-?"
"You're so
 perfect." His breath was labored while he stared down at your nipple, hardened by the cold temperature of the eclipse air "Sevin
" (pretty)
"I'm so afraid of you, Neteyam... You're too big and honestly...scary. I'm so sorry. I'm always trying to pick up signals that may indicate you're gonna hurt me. I don't feel comfortable at all right now. Please, let me go" You said as your cold, anxious hands took your nightgown strap back to where it belonged, covering your boob again, feeling ashamed of the vulnerable way you had just been seen by Neteyam, ashamed of the fact that he, a boy you barely knew, had just seen your naked breast, even if it was only for a brief period of time
"My cute little 'emyu
" (cook, cooker) "You don't need to be afraid of me." He smiles at you in such a sincere way, trying to show you he means no harm whatsoever. 
Though Neteyam felt his heart tightening way too much inside his chest, hurting so much it was like you had crushed it when you said you're afraid of him, he was carefully trying to make you see he would never in a billion years harm you, his precious little yawne (loved one).
He wished so hard, even prayed to Eywa, in a millisecond, inside his mind, that you would soon realize he loved you so much he would kill anyone who ever hurt your precious, frail human body. He could not understand how you could think he himself would do such a horrible thing towards you.
When Neteyam saw you did not show any sign that you were beginning to trust him more, he said:
"HĂŹ'i," (little, small in size) "please... I need you... I love your scent so much. I miss it everytime I'm away from you. I love the way your human skin smells. I do. I dream about you at night... " He gets closer to you slowly and carefully, caging you between the wall and his broad, crazily tall blue body, leaving no way for you to get away from him "C-can I touch you? Touch your skin?" Neteyam breathes, begging for you with his wide eyed gaze "Just for a little while, please..." He kneels down at the ground to be as close as he possibly can to your height "See? I'm not so tall anymore. Am I a little less scary now?" He smiles faintly, trying to cover his pain with a fake demonstration of joy.
Neteyam feels so insecure, without any guarantee that you will eventually let him in. But he will never give up on trying to be worthy of your love.
"You're always gonna be scary to me. Even when I'm in my Avatar, I think." Using a sharp na'vi knife to stab Neteyam's heart repeatedly would have hurt him less than that statement "I'm not as skilled as you are or experienced as you are when it comes to using a bow or anything like that. God, I can't even work a bow right. If you'd ever hurt me, even by accident I-"
"I can teach you." He interrupted "I will teach you everything I know about archery. I'm a great archer, you know? I like to call myself "Mighty Warrior". " He smiles, frowning a bit, trying to make a joke to make the situation a little lighter.
You seemed so afraid he was starting to not know what to do anymore to try to make you see you were safe with him. That he would defend you from any danger without any hesitation and not be the danger himself.
àŒŠâ€âž·
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ahundredtimesover · 2 months
Text
I Want You to Stay (06) | JJK
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Pairing: Jungkook x (f.) Reader
Genre/Tags: boss!JK x assistant!reader; idiot strangers to lovers; slow slow burn; k-drama feels; angst, drama, fluff, smut
Chapter (Series) Warnings: foul/explicit language; alcohol consumption & passing out, unhealthy coping mechanisms; family drama; minor injuries; power dynamics (JK starts off as a jerk); work-related anxiety, feelings of helplessness, insecurities; childhood traumatic experiences, nightmares; sexual harassment, prior incidence of domestic violence (PLS PLS BE CAREFUL WHEN READING); arts and business/property devt talk that’s probably inaccurate; commitment issues & emotionally constipated characters; cold and detached JK; eventual explicit sexual content (specific warnings stated per chapter) (18+)
Chapter Word count: 14.6k
Series Masterlist
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Status: Ongoing
Series summary: Working for Jungkook isn’t the same as working for Hoseok. For starters, Jungkook doesn’t smile, he doesn’t appreciate you, and he gives you too much work. It doesn’t help that he’s incredibly handsome and has women at his beck and call. But as the tension grows, it becomes impossible to resist him. You’ve dedicated yourself to your job for 8 years so when you finally decide to put yourself first, he asks you to reconsider. And while you know that leaving is difficult, you learn that when it comes to Jungkook, staying is always so much harder.
PlaylistÂ đŸŽ¶: on the way home
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A/N: We're slowly heading somewhere! Still slow but it's something hehe thank you again for appreciating this piece! đŸ„° Also... JK in that Vogue outfit with a corsage. YEP.
And as always, my biggest thanks to @wonwoonlight  đŸ„°
PS. If I can’t tag you, pls fix your settings!
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The silence that engulfs Jungkook’s apartment once you enter the following Monday is quite unnerving, as it brings back memories of the last time this happened and a half-naked woman came out of the bedroom and questioned who you were. The gym is empty. There’s no other sound of someone typing away or talking on the phone like the few times that you found Jungkook working before you even arrived.
You take a deep breath and decide to just face whoever comes out of these doors until one of them opens and out comes the man himself - alone - dressed in an oversized jumper and sweatpants. He looks like he just got out of bed with his semi-mussed hair - with a little sprout bouncing along as he moves - and groggy eyes, which widen once it registers that you’re here.
“Mr. Jeon,” you bow in greeting. “Are you feeling better?”
“A little,” he replies, his deep and gruff voice startling you a little. “What do you have there?”
He gestures towards the paper bag you’re holding, and you remember what you decided to bring over.
“Uh, chicken noodle soup,” you mutter, somehow suddenly shy. “Just an option for this morning. I wasn’t sure if you were still feeling under the weather.”
“I think I’m just fatigued,” he says. “But uh, I can have that.”
“Yes, sir,” you nod, putting it in a pot to eventually heat. 
You prepare his suits for the week then prepare his breakfast, pouring yourself a small serving as well. He takes his seat and starts eating, and you glance at him to see his reaction.
“Where did you get the one from last Saturday?” He asks, his face expressionless.
“From a store nearby,” you answer. “I was heading somewhere and your building was on the way.”
“This tastes better. Where did you get this from?” 
“I, uh, I made it,” you say softly, feeling a bit of pride that it’s something he complimented. 
There’s prolonged silence that you’re suddenly nervous about. His eyes remain focused straight ahead while yours constantly flit towards him, partly to gauge if he’ll start talking about last week’s meeting and partly to see his reaction about your dish.
“You don’t have to send or make me food, Ms. Cho,” he finally says, wishing he’d said it with a bit more warmth. 
But he’s not used to speaking that way, so it comes off as displeasure, as if he doesn’t appreciate what you’d done even if that’s exactly how he feels. He’s grateful; he just doesn’t want another reason to think that you actually care about him. 
“My health is my responsibility, not yours,” he adds.
“I, uh
 I suppose that’s true,” you say even more softly. “I just thought it would be nice to be given something like this when you’re sick.”
And it’s the truth. During the times you were unwell, Hoseok would remind you to rest or take your medicines; he even bought you vitamins and it’s why taking them became a habit of yours. You barely had the energy to make soup. But after that one time when you braved through an event and Yoongi noticed you feeling under the weather, he took you to a noodle house and ordered extra chicken noodle soup for you to take home. You had it all through the weekend, and though it wasn’t like your mom’s, it was still something familiar, and it was comfort that you badly needed.
You thought it was something you could extend to Jungkook. You weren’t sure if he was spending the weekend at home by himself, but in case he was, you thought that something warm would help. You were on your way to watch a local film and happened to pass by his area, the image of him sick and probably alone prompting you to just buy that dish and leave it at the reception. You suddenly craved it and made one for yourself last night, thinking it wouldn’t hurt if you brought some over for him as well. Even if he thinks it isn’t your responsibility, you think it’s still within your role to make sure that your boss - the Vice President - conducts his functions properly, and he can only do so if he’s healthy. 
As you finish the small portion that you prepared for yourself, Jungkook wonders who’d taken care of you during the times you were sick. With your friends and family miles away, perhaps there wasn’t anyone. Maybe it was a boyfriend. Or maybe like what he’s come to see, you did things on your own. Maybe you think there’s no one doing that for him, too. 
And you wouldn’t be wrong. He was never good with company, after all, whether it was offering or keeping it. So when someone offers something as simple as a bowl of soup for when he’s feeling unwell, it cuts through the walls he’s built around himself because he’s become used to no one even knocking to check how he’s doing. 
But in an effort to remain unmoved and insistent on keeping his distance, he sets boundaries once more. 
“You don’t need to do this for me, Mr. Cho,” he states. “I appreciate it, but I’d prefer if you don’t do it again.”
He sees your face fall from his periphery, and much as he wants to take it back, he knows he has to hold back. It was hard enough to resist feeling cared for. 
He’d really spent the weekend by himself, turning down his friends’ invitation to go to a resort and Hoseok’s offer of dinner at this newly opened steak house. Jungkook was buried under the covers when the phone rang informing him that you’d left something for him, unwilling to move and get off the bed because he was too tired but also too hungry, so when he opened the bag and it registered to him what you've given him, he felt less alone and less sad for himself. The image of your shy expression flashed through his mind and he couldn’t help the smile he let out, giving himself only a minute to bask in your kindness before reminding himself that it means nothing more than making sure he’s well. It’s harder for you if he’s sick, he convinced himself. Still, he’d rather not think about it; he’d rather not torture himself by his brain wanting you to mean one thing, but his heart hoping it was another.
“I understand, Mr. Jeon,” you say, your voice a little too firm for his liking. “I apologize if it made you uncomfortable.”
“It—” didn’t, he wants to say. It made him feel nice and comfortable and that’s what he can’t let himself feel around you. 
“I treat this as part of my job,” you reason, a half lie because you really did want to extend some kindness even if he may not exactly be deserving of it. “But it may not be so for you. I’ll take note of this moving forward.”
Jungkook concedes. Any objection will counter what he’s been saying, even if he didn’t mean all of it. And like how you always do, you get over it quickly, flashing him a measured smile and taking out your iPad to go through this week’s schedule. 
You both head to the car after and discuss his previous meetings. You’re detailed and engaged, taking down notes and asking him questions like the professional that you are. He tells you about his meeting with artist Lee Jaemin and that he agreed with 80% of the pieces that you and Yoongi chose. You talk about the Board members’ reactions during his presentation and he shares what they talked to him about during the dinner. 
“Socializing with them was tiring,” he admits. “I couldn’t keep up with all the things that they wanted to talk about.”
You give him an assuring smile. “You looked like you did well,” you assure him. “They seemed engaged, although as Mr. Jung would say, part of that is for show, to get on your good side. It would be smarter to think that not all of it was genuine.”
“True. But I enjoyed speaking with Mr. Saito. He’s an architect, too, and we had a really good talk about incorporating traditional elements in a modern design.”
“Yes, he’s always been kind,” you say. “But it’s good that you’re able to forge these relationships. Perhaps it’s also new to them, seeing you in that light. I suppose they don’t know you all that much. It’s a nice change being able to engage with you.”
“What do you mean?”
“Ah, well, it’s just during the company events that you attended, it wasn’t exactly hard to spot you,” you chuckle, seemingly comfortable now.
“And why is that so?” 
He turns to you, legitimately curious because he’d never really noticed you before, even if he knew you as Hoseok’s assistant. If he’s being honest, you didn’t even look familiar when you first met, and that just reinforces the fact that Jungkook didn’t really care for the other people around him, especially during those events he was required to fly to Seoul to attend. If he’d paid a bit more attention, maybe he wouldn’t have been caught off guard when he did finally meet you. Maybe he wouldn’t have been as rude, too.
“If I may, sir, it was quite easy to spot one of the Jeon sons always at the bar,” you chuckle. “Your father and cousin would often look for you and you were always in the same spot.”
You’d noticed him, Jungkook thinks to himself. He wonders what you’d thought about him then, but given how he hated those events, it probably wouldn’t be something good. He just always couldn’t wait to leave. 
“Ah. As you can tell, I’m not one who likes to socialize,” he says. “I don’t really know what to talk to people about. And I’m not that good with names nor faces. It was easier to keep to myself.”
“That’s understandable. But you already know that’ll have to change,” you remind him. “Half of what Mr. Jung did was attend events.”
“I know. He’s been preparing me for that. I need your help in that aspect, too, from remembering names to getting my energy up. Those are oddly what I’m most nervous about, if I’m being honest.”
“I’ll do what I can, Mr. Jeon,” you assure him. “I hope I can make things easy for you.”
You’ll never know the irony of your words, and perhaps the push and pull it brings about - as you try to make things easy for him, the harder it actually becomes on his end. 
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You find yourself back at the tailor shop the next Thursday for Jungkook’s suit fitting, and if it wasn’t for Taehyung telling you that your gowns are ready, you would have totally forgotten that you had some dresses made as well. 
While Jungkook tries on his outfits, you’re instructed to choose several dress shirts that he’d be adding to his wardrobe, given the various functions he’d be attending from now on. You didn’t anticipate for this to be part of your role, but you don’t mind, as it’s a welcome change to what you normally do, which is attend meetings, bury yourself in paperwork, and everything else in between. At least you’ll be visiting the venue for the Arts Center event tomorrow, but today, you focus on the task at hand, which turns out to be harder than expected.
The options are endless. It doesn’t help that you have to envision Jungkook in each piece of clothing and that he looks good in every one of them, and that you have to imagine him at all. You see him everyday - and have seen him in as little as in just his gym shorts - and you don’t really want to have him in your mind as well. But how he presents himself is a big part of his new role, as Hoseok had told you. As the Vice President, Jungkook needs to look sophisticated and respectable, someone worthy to represent the company and the Jeon family name. 
You go for different hues of grays and blacks and other colors, too. There’s an olive green that looks really nice, and a few maroons and pinks that would add variety to his everyday look. You’re focused on making your choices, but your focus shifts to Jungkook when he comes out of the dressing room donned in a patterned  black suit. The fit is perfect and even with the distance between you two, you could spot impeccable details that make the outfit look elegant yet fresh. 
“This is for the gala,” Taehyung states. “What do you think, Ms. Cho?”
“It looks nice” is all you manage to say. 
It’s the only word you feel is neutral enough to describe him. Even if you could accept that Jungkook is handsome, you don’t exactly want to say so in front of him.
“I was going for something better than nice, but that should be fine, I guess. What do you think, Kook?”
“I like it. But don’t you think the sleeves are a bit too fit on my arms?” Jungkook asks his friend.
“Well, it’s not like you were flexing them when I was measuring you,” Taehyung playfully rolls his eyes. “But I can adjust it, since I doubt you’d take a pause on lifting weights anyway. It’s probably the material though so don’t worry, I’ll fix this. Okay, on to the next one.”
You return to your task at hand, choosing some patterned tops that are appropriate for less formal events, and you inform Taehyung who then says that he’ll have those made in Jungkook’s measurements. With your task finished, Taehyung instructs you to head downstairs so you could fit your gowns as well, and you follow in anticipation because these might just be the first and only custom-made pieces of clothing you’ll ever have the luxury of wearing.
A female staff assists you, making sure that the length and neckline are to your liking. The first outfit, the one for the Arts Center event, is an old rose sleeveless lace midi dress that looks even more gorgeous when worn. The gown for the Appointment Dinner is a black short-sleeved pleated piece that is both functional and fashionable, but it’s the last one - the one for the gala - that has your jaw dropping to the ground.
“Ms. Cho,” you hear Taehyung call out from outside the fitting room. “Is everything okay?”
“Y-yeah,” you stutter, unable to stop looking at yourself in the mirror and turning around to try to see every angle of the stunning dress. “It’s just, uh
”
“It’s what?” He asks worriedly. “Can you come outside so I can see?” 
You take a breath before pulling the heavy curtains open and find Taehyung and Jungkook standing not far away.
“It’s too pretty, Mr. Kim,” you say shyly. “I don’t think I can wear this.”
“Well, you will. Because it’s custom-made,” he points out. “And it looks gorgeous on you. It fits perfectly. I assume the others do as well?”
“Yes,” you smile, feeling like a fairytale princess who gets to wear a gown that her fairy godmother had made for her. “They’re just
”
“Exactly what you need as this guy’s right hand woman,” Taehyung finishes for you.
He gestures towards his best friend who seems expressionless and probably unimpressed by how you look. It’s not like you mind but it at least wouldn’t be humiliating if he just stood there looking uninterested.
“What do you think, Kook?”
“It looks nice,” Jungkook shrugs, repeating the words you’d used on him earlier. Shifting his gaze from you to Taehyung, he excuses himself. “I’ll head to the car, I have calls to make.”
“I’ll finish up here,” you say, turning around to go back to the fitting room.
Jungkook exits the shop and finally breathes, feeling like he’d suffocated inside because of how you looked. He’d wondered how the dresses turned out, curious about the designs because Taehyung didn’t want to show him; it’s a surprise, the man had said. And now Jungkook knows why. 
Stunning would be an inadequate word to use. The burgundy color of the gown made it look sophisticated on you, even more with the off-shoulder that showed off some of your features that he’d rather not think about. The flow was elegant, and he half wishes that he hadn’t thought of having these made only so he could avoid the moment earlier when he felt his throat dry up because of how beautiful you looked. 
He’s gonna have to get used to being rendered speechless every time, he thinks, but it’s not like it doesn’t happen everyday, anyway. Every morning that he finds you standing in his kitchen, donning the pencil skirt and blouse ensemble that assistants are recommended to wear, his mind short circuits. There’s something especially fresh and electrifying about you at the start of the day, and he always has to pull himself together and act normal around you without giving himself away. 
He can’t nurture the attraction, after all, even if he’s reminded of it during times like earlier, even more so when he gazes at you and you hold it, letting the tension build unconsciously. Because that’s what happened, as you pulled open the curtains and looked up. He wishes you were too shy to notice how long he had his eyes on you. But it’s why he had to get away. You’re too much for him sometimes, and he doesn’t know if you have any idea of how you affect him.
Jungkook stares at his phone, half hoping that an actual call would come to distract him. But nothing does, and he leans his head back and groans in frustration. What is it about you that makes him absolutely weak in the knees and stupid in the head? 
Back inside, you give Taehyung your address so he can have the gowns delivered to your apartment for your convenience. 
“Thank you again, Mr. Kim,” you say. “I wish I could do your creations justice.”
“You will. It’s in the confidence, so exude it, okay?”
“I’ll try,” you giggle. “Especially since those pieces will pretty much blow the Office of the VP’s budget.”
“Is that what Kook said? That these are budgeted under him?” Taehyung arches an eyebrow.
“Uh, yes, sort of. I just assumed because he’d pointed out that they were being made as part of my functions,” you explain. 
“Hmm. I know his office has a lot of money but these gowns would definitely blow up any contingency fund you have,” he chuckles. “So no, your assumption is wrong. Kook’s paying for all this.”
“What?” You exclaim. “But that’s— why?”
“Well, you do need these as part of your job, and he wanted to save you the inconvenience of spending for them. I mean, he did buy Lucas some suits, too. But between you and me, I think this is his way of apologizing to you, just in a very gallant way.”
“You mean unnecessary and undeserving,” you correct, still in shock that Jungkook is paying for all those, even if yes, he can easily afford them. 
“Nope, not at all. I know he’s been difficult to deal with and I’d like to apologize on his behalf, seeing that he’s terrible at doing it. I know it doesn’t make things better but at least it’s something you don’t have to worry about anymore.”
“Well, that does help a bit,” you smile, following him as he heads out the door. “But thank you again, Mr. Kim.”
“Off with the formalities,” he laughs. “It’s Taehyung. And you’re welcome. It’s the least I could do to somehow make up for my ass of a best friend.” 
“He’s not too bad. Not anymore, at least,” you counter. “I’ll go ahead. Have a good day, Taehyung!”
Jungkook manages to look down on his phone in time for you not to see him watch you talk freely and casually with his friend. That’s another person close to him who gets to experience how you’re like - joyful and warm, perhaps a little shy sometimes, but comfortable just the same. It’s something he’ll only see from afar; your positions necessitate some distance, but perhaps that’s better than not having you around at all. 
You enter the car and you’re back to being quiet and reserved, your eyes focused on the road while Jungkook, in an effort not to keep glancing at you, turns to his leather notebook and doodles some designs that pop in his head. It’s his way of calming himself down most days, helping him focus given that his mind is often filled with too many thoughts that he can’t express. He hopes that in drawing them, he can somehow rid himself of the feelings he’s locked in and it helps, as he’s somehow able to get over the tension from earlier and the tiniest bit of jealousy over your casual engagement with Taehyung.
You both return to the office, with Jungkook proceeding to his room to prepare for a lunch meeting and you follow, taking some signed documents that he’d left earlier.
“Mr. Jeon,” you say as he settles in his seat. “Thank you for the dresses. I
 I’ve never had anything as beautiful as those and undeserving as I may feel, I’m just really appreciative.”
Jungkook isn’t prepared for the softness in your voice as you say the words, and like the consistent jerk that he is, he brushes it off.
“Taehyung made them; you should thank him. I just paid for them,” he utters, his tone stern and uncaring.
His eyes flit to you when there’s silence on your end, and he wishes they hadn’t. There’s resignation in yours, as if he’s shattering another moment you’re creating where you’re just being sincere and he’s being dismissive. It’s his default, he reasons, not just towards you but towards everyone. Normally he wouldn’t mind how the other would take it, but with you right now, he wishes he was so much better than this. 
You hold his gaze, as if trying to tell him things you don’t want to express. He’s not one to apologize, but he also won’t accept gratitude. You’re starting to think that what Jungkook can’t handle is any form of human connection. It’s something you struggle with at times, but you’re at least open to it, willing to accept kindness and appreciating people for what they have to offer. Jungkook deflects; he turns away. It seemed like it took so much for him to even verbalize needing your help and perhaps he was desperate; his reputation was on the line after all. But even then, he doesn’t give nor does he accept, and you wonder what made him that way. 
“Is there anything else?” He finally asks after a long beat of silence. 
“Nothing more,” you shake your head and excuse yourself. 
Returning to your desk, you look at Jungkook from your seat. There’s a hint of emptiness in his eyes that you often mistake for apathy. Perhaps there’s more and perhaps the help he really needs isn’t just about dealing with his father or remembering names or navigating relationships required for his role. Maybe it’s about opening himself up a little, or smiling when the situation calls for it, or not questioning other people’s kindness towards him. Maybe it’s about realizing he’s more than just this heir to the company or the playboy he’s known as. Maybe it’s about seeing that he’s capable of sincerity and gentleness as well.
You sigh to yourself. It’s probably a long shot but you only feel strongly about it because you know what it’s like to turn people away. If it hadn’t been for your family and friends, you probably would’ve continued to do so. Jungkook may be your boss but he’s human, too, and he may just be waiting around to see who’d be patient enough to extend a hand and let him know that he’s not alone, that someone understands, and maybe that someone is you.
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The days fly by too quickly for your liking and you haven't been able to take a breath. You had a meeting with the organizing committee of the Appointment Dinner most of last Friday and you spent your weekend coordinating with the designers for the Arts Center launch. It’s been last minute preparations these past two days and before you know it, Wednesday has come. You stayed late the night before and were gladly checked in at the hotel with the other assistants, so you at least got a bit of sleep even if your body felt like it continued to stay awake. 
But tonight is important, as the newly appointed executives will be formally introduced to the corporation’s directors, shareholders, and subsidiary companies. You’ve been organizing this with the planning committee since the appointments were announced, and given that coordinating events like this is one of your primary tasks, you’re exhausted and excited and nervous all at once. But it’s the second time you’re doing this and you’ve learned so much since you did this for Hoseok. There’s more knowledge, sure, but there’s also more confidence. You also know enough to eat before the guests arrive and at 3PM, it’s exactly what you do, knowing you won’t have much else until the event ends.
The other employees compliment your dress, and you’re too shy to say who had designed it but you eventually do, knowing it’s good for Taehyung’s brand. But you don’t say much else, choosing instead to focus on the guest list as you’re tasked to do, and you go around the events hall to make sure that the VIP name cards are placed on their proper tables. You’re able to sneak bites of the canapes as you go, allowing yourself a flute of champagne for that kick you need to socialize with the guests tonight. 
You engage with the early birds when they arrive, guiding them to their seats and putting on your most welcoming smile. You get Mr. Ri’s message that they’re nearby, so you head outside and stand by the entrance and wait for them, knowing Jungkook would want to know how things are going.
He exits the car in a black suit and white top, a statement brooch adorning his classic coat. The strands of his long hair are tucked behind his ears and he looks even more polished than usual, a look that catches attention; it definitely catches yours. 
“Mr. Jeon,” you bow in greeting. “Some of your invited guests have arrived.” 
“Have you spoken to them?” He asks, as you walk slightly behind him towards the venue. 
“I have, and they’re looking forward to seeing you.” 
He nods, and just as he’s about to enter the hall, he stops and turns towards you. 
“You’re busy tonight, aren’t you?”
“Somewhat, sir,” you reply. “We all have our tasks but I’m free to move around. Do you need help with anything?”
“Just, uh, names.”
“I’ll always be nearby,” you assure him. 
Your smile gives him the comfort he needs. He’s been without it since yesterday afternoon, given that you had to prepare as part of the organizing committee. And while the support team and Yoongi have been encouraging, only you really know why every event such as this is important for him. 
Jungkook has already made gains with some of the Board members last week; this time, it’s about engaging everyone else - the staff, the partners, and key personalities in the industry. Hoseok and Ji-woo have done this before but it’s Jungkook’s first time. He’s no longer just an executive in the Southeast Asian office; he’s now the Vice President of the entire company. There’s a lot of pressure that comes from carrying the Jeon family name, and even more being the only one of the two sons who’s taking on such an important role. 
The event hall is grand. It’s pretty special, too. It’s one of the projects he worked on as part of the design department years ago before he left for Singapore, and the thought makes him stop. Perhaps this is the reason why his father chose this venue for tonight; if anything, it’s a reminder of what Jungkook is capable of. He takes a breath and looks around to soak everything in before approaching his invited guests - partners and consultants he worked with in his previous role. 
But that ends quickly, as many more people approach him for a greeting. 
Jungkook is a bit overwhelmed. He tries to hold eye contact when he speaks to them but he can only do so for so long. Some faces are familiar but the names escape him, and he starts to regret all the times that he flew here for events like this and never engaged with the other guests. If he had, perhaps this wouldn’t be so hard. 
There are those who introduce themselves, while there are those who don’t, perhaps assuming that he’d know who they are. Just like the couple who’s speaking to him excitedly, and he wants to return the energy by at least calling them by their names. His mind is blank, and just as he’s about to give up, he looks up and sees you, your eyes catching his as if you’re just waiting for his cry for help. 
There’s pleading in his eyes and you get it immediately, as you walk towards his direction then greet the pair next to him.
“Mr. and Mrs. Yamada,” you say. “It’s lovely to see both of you again. I saw in the news that you’re launching a new project with our partners from Dubai. That’s quite exciting.”
“Ah, Ms. Cho,” they greet you back. “Yes, all thanks to Mr. Jung who helped us with that partnership. We’re excited for it as well.”
“Oh, I’m sure. We’re looking forward to it,” you smile.
“Thank you. I’m pleased to know that you remain as the Vice President’s assistant,” Mrs. Yamada says. “Perhaps we can invite Mr. Jeon to one of our hotels in Japan? Or even in London?”
You turn to Jungkook who looks less tense than he did a few minutes ago.
“Ah, yes, that would be great, Mr. and Mrs. Yamada,” he responds. “I’m sure I’ll find time during one of my trips and I’ll definitely give you a call. Perhaps we can talk about projects we can work on as well.”
The excitement in the couple’s faces is a joy to see and for their sake, you really do wish that Jungkook makes good on his promise. You ask him about it after they leave, and he says that the names were familiar. Ji-woo’s talked about working with them before and that they’re long-time friends of the family, so he should maintain that relationship. 
A call of his name prompts both of you to look to the side, and he turns to you with a questioning face. 
“Mr. Adam’s an investor. Behind him is Professor Zhang from SNU. They’re friends of your father,” you tell him. Seeing Bitna signal for you, you say, “I have to check on something, Mr. Jeon. I’ll be back.”
You turn around to head to one of the tables, but you look back to watch Jungkook greet those who approach him, his smile becoming more natural as the moments pass by. You briefly meet with some staff about the musical guest and some other last minute adjustments. You greet Taehyung and Seokjin who show up to support their best friend, with both men complimenting how you look.
Knowing that Jungkook will be needing you again after, you call over Do-hyun and Yohan and delegate some of your monitoring tasks to them, and then stand by one of the tables as you watch the socialization take place as more guests come in.
Your eyes find Jungkook again as he’s engaged in a conversation with some Board members and other partners, and you smile a little at how he’s able to maintain eye contact and look like he’s actually interested, especially after he looks up and gives you a look as if to say that he’s trying his best. 
“Why are you watching him like some child who’s trying to make friends at the playground?” Chin-sun asks, the teasing tone of her voice making you chuckle. “He’s a grown man, you know? He can hold his own.”
“I know,” you reply, turning to her. “But it’s one of the many things that’s new about his role. And probably one of the more important ones. I just wanna let him know that he’s doing a good job.”
“Well, there’s no wife or girlfriend to do that. I guess that makes it your responsibility then.”
You disregard her comment’s implication and point out that Hoseok does that for Jungkook, too, but he’s just as busy and perhaps just as nervous as well. 
“It matters a lot to hear it. Plus, social events can be overwhelming and isolating at the same time. He’s still getting used to it,” you add.
The prolonged silence prompts you to turn to her.
“You know, I admire you for a lot of things,” she says. “Your ability to remain kind after everything is one of them. I mean, after how he treated you those first few weeks? That was tough.”
Your resigned face pushes her to continue. “Do-hyun could’ve gone on without telling me about seeing you cry and I still would’ve known. You tried to hide it but your smile always fell too fast and your eyes were just always sad. Must’ve been hard, trying to get the team on his side when you couldn’t do that for yourself.”
“I honestly don’t know how I survived that first month,” you laugh to mask the sadness from that experience. “But that’s in the past. He still has his moments but at least there are good ones now. I’m here to do my job. Being kind after everything is part of it.”
“I wish you didn’t have to keep it to yourself though,” she laments. “If we couldn’t help, we could’ve at least cheered you up.”
“I didn’t want to bring you guys into it,” you say. “The team was incredibly busy with so many things and I managed. That’s what matters.”
“Oh, ___,” she sighs. “You put so much of yourself in your job. I think that’s why the bosses trust you. But that takes so much out of you, too. Do you have anything left for yourself?”
“What’s left is right here, Chin-sun. I don’t think I know what I am outside of all this.”
“Doesn’t that bother you? I mean, I’ve worked with you for three years and I can’t say I really know you outside of this, too. And if you can’t
 well, that’s something to think about.”
“And I have. It’s something I’ve asked myself, but trying to find the answer isn’t as easy as asking the question. So I just put all my energy into my work because where else would I? It at least pays the bills and lets me enjoy little luxuries every once in a while,” you reason. 
“Well, I know what learning who you are outside of this job would entail, and I’m a little selfish because I need you around,” she smiles. “No one does things the way you do, and that’s also why I figured that at some point, Mr. Jeon was gonna get himself together because he can’t afford to lose you. You’re so good at this, ___. He’s lucky you didn’t quit.”
“Apparently, it takes a lot to get me to quit,” you reply. 
Or I was just never brave enough to do it, you want to say. Asking the question is indeed always easier than finding the answer. 
“Let’s hope you find a way to find yourself without resigning. We can’t afford to lose you, too,” she winks. 
“I appreciate that, Chin-sun. Thank you.”
“Well, I think it matters that you know that you’re doing amazing. I hope he treats you as you deserve.”
He tries, you think to yourself. At least that’s what you hope. 
The call of your names from a familiar voice excites you, as A-yeong approaches you and Chin-sun. You engage in your usual hushed conversations until you see Jungkook in another sea of people and you decide to approach him, the relief on his face telling you that he’s indeed been needing you. 
It’s not your preferred crowd. Something you’ve learned in your years of attending these events is that you would smile and entertain them and men would think it’s an invitation to invade your personal space. A lingering touch on the elbow, a hand on your waist, standing a millimeter too close
 and they disregard your uncomfortable look or attempts at stepping away. 
The man you’re introduced to is new but his ways aren’t, and you scan the hall to find Bitna who turns to you in time, the look you give her signaling another person to look out for. It’s a system they developed that they’ve filled you in on, and you immediately excuse yourself and check on the food served at the back even if you know they’re still well stocked. It at least allows you a breather. You’re not even a main actor but you’re tired as hell from socializing with people. 
It’s not long after when the event starts. Speeches and a performance take place while dishes are being put out, and it’s after the main course is served when Jungkook steps away from his seat. 
Choosing to stand towards the back before he’s called on stage to be introduced, he scans the hall and thinks about the work that the committee put in, including you, who had to deal with him while dealing with all this. He catches sight of you speaking with the other assistants, and he already knows there’s some planning going on. But like the last time, he felt you around even if you were busy; you held his gaze during the times he felt a little overwhelmed. 
“You ready?”
Yoongi’s voice is deep but calming, and Jungkook takes it as his friend’s way of encouraging him. 
“Not really, but I’ll manage.” 
“Good. You’ve got people on your side,” Yoongi assures him. “Like me. And especially her.”
He gestures towards the left where Jungkook sees you approaching them. Since you started working for him, he didn’t expect how easily he could find comfort in your presence. He went from wishing you were someone else, to wanting to distance himself from you, to constantly hoping you were around. Those last two could actually coexist, and they do. There’s still detachment as his means to combat the attraction - he tries not to care about you, to not get to know you, to remind himself of who you are in his life, but he still depends on you for support, for comfort, for stability. You make his life easier; you also make it feel less lonely. And every time you’re there is a moment where he feels like he could breathe, like the noise in his mind stills because he’s forced to focus on you; somehow, you captivate him that way. 
“Are you ready, Mr. Jeon?”
The contrasting tenderness of your voice gives him that boost and he nods despite the lingering nervousness.
“I guess so,” he huffs. “Let’s get this over with.”
He walks towards his seat up front while you stay behind with Yoongi who leads you to one of the free tables at the back. You both don’t say much to each other, focusing instead on the short speeches that Ji-woo and Hoseok give, both of them expressing their gratitude and giving previews of upcoming projects to look forward to. They’re masters at commanding a crowd, as evidenced by their engagement and loud applause at the end of it. You can already imagine Jungkook feeling even more nervous, knowing that’s not really his style, but you hope that your earlier encouragement lingers, as he walks towards the stage.
He delivers his speech flawlessly. Knowing him the way you do, you could tell he let his vulnerability shine through, even if it may not seem much to everyone else. The teaser about the Arts Center gets people excited, which he builds up on. He even slides in a few jokes that surprisingly get the audience entertained. 
A small smile paints your face and from next to you, Yoongi chuckles in almost disbelief. 
“Is it safe to say you’re proud of him?” He asks, as Jungkook walks down the stage and CEO Jeon takes the mic. 
“You could say that,” you turn to him. “It’s silly, considering how things started. I
 I didn’t think I’d be genuinely rooting for him, you know? But I am. I really want him to do well.”
“That’s good to hear, ___. I guess it means that things really are changing and he’s treating you better.”
“I think they are,” you hum. “I mean, not the best, but I also don’t know what that’s supposed to look like. I guess I’m just understanding who he is a little bit better now. And I think that makes the difference.”
“Like I said, he’s not a terrible person. He just needs
 someone to be patient with him, someone to show him kindness,” Yoongi says. “I think that’s what he lost along the way. He stopped being that way to himself and so did people. They just didn’t want to upset him, but they also didn’t give or show anything more.”
“You think so?”
“Why do you think it’s so hard for him to forge even the simplest and most basic connections?” Yoongi questions. “They lack meaning for him. I think he’s forgotten what that’s like. Without sincerity or kindness, without intensity or honesty, there’s just
 emptiness. Everything is fleeting for him.”
“And you’re telling me this, why?” You eye him curiously. 
“Because I think your kindness did something to him.”
“And that is?”
“He’s showing a bit of that to himself, too. And I guess to others as well,” Yoongi explains. 
“I’m a mere assistant doing her job, Yoongi,” you shake your head. “It’s a little selfish but I do what I can to appease him and to make our relationship good enough to make this job bearable for me. If it makes him a better person, good for him and better for me. I’ll just keep doing it then.”
Your friend’s silence prompts you to turn towards him. He seems to be in deep thought, perhaps analyzing what you’d just said, which he tends to do. 
There’s no lie in your statement. You’d done your part of standing up to Jungkook at the start; you at least got to show you were capable of fighting for yourself in that sense. But after that, you learned that keeping things in and letting him see how his actions affect you works as well. You show kindness because it’s natural for you, but also because it keeps the peace, it keeps both of you stable. 
But you can also admit that you do all that because wanting him to know that he’s got you on his side is a way to tell yourself that you’ve got people rooting for you, too, even if you’re not the best at keeping relationships nor keeping people close. You show Jungkook what you want to experience from people; you make him feel what you want to feel. Maybe that makes you selfish. You think it also makes you human.
It’s not something you tell Yoongi, though. But maybe with the way he looks at you assuringly, you suppose he knows it, too.
The event finally ends and the guests start exiting the venue. You bid them goodbye while instructing some in-house staff about cleaning up. Mr. and Mrs. Jeon greet you on their way out, commending you for your work along with the others, and it’s their encouraging smiles that remind you of one of the reasons why you stick to this job. They’re people you don’t want to disappoint as well, and seeing them satisfied is always a good thing. 
“Hey, you’re officially off the clock,” Bitna reminds you. “A couple of us are staying for closing, remember?”
“Right,” you smile. 
They have a day off tomorrow because of tonight but it’s not something you can afford, given that you’ve got the Arts Center event one a week from now. It’s almost midnight and you’d have to be up in 5 hours.
“I’ll get going then. I’ll just say goodbye to— oh, Mr. Jeon,” you say, finding him just as you were about to look for him. “Is there anything I can help you with before I leave?”
“Oh, there’s nothing. Just, uh, how are you getting home?”
“A cab,” you answer. 
Yoongi nudges your arm from next to you with a pout on his face. “Yah! I’ll take you home. It’s not safe to take a cab this late.”
“Yes, that’s preferable, Ms. Cho,” Jungkook says. “It’s been a long night.”
“Okay, sir,” you nod. “And it has. You also did really well. I didn’t expect the jokes but they were obviously a hit. Yoongi laughed, that’s how I know.”
“You laughed, too,” Yoongi points out.
“I’m glad it worked, then,” Jungkook says. “You can get going. You can also report to my place at 8AM to give you more time to rest. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
Jungkook heads out and rushes to the car where Mr. Ri drives him home. His mind is still buzzing from what transpired but he’s glad he managed like he said he would, like you believed he would. 
And amidst the relief that he did well and the nervousness from having to do something similar again next week, there’s you, a vision that he quickly shakes off and one he finds himself seeing after every big and small thing that he does. 
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Your warm shower and your bed have never felt this good, only because you’re as tired as you are and you want nothing more than the weekend to come. But you’ve got a few more stressful days ahead of you and you try to push through them one at a time.
You go to Jungkook later than usual that Thursday then spend much of the entire day meeting with him and the team about next week’s event. You conduct a visit to the venue the next day and then spend the weekend answering guests’ queries and helping Chin-sun coordinate with suppliers. Monday and Tuesday have you going from one place to another and hopping from one meeting to the next, all while balancing your executive assistant and events manager responsibilities. 
It’s incredibly tiring, but you also won’t deny the exhilaration you feel. There’s something so satisfying about seeing everything come together, especially as you look around the venue - an industrial commercial space that Jungkook and Yoongi jointly designed specifically for tonight. The high ceilings allow for the large panels that project the Arts Center design, with bright lights Illuminating the curated sculptures and art pieces placed around. The space elicits a feeling of newness and familiarity, of hollowness and clarity. There’s integration of traditional and modern elements and essentially, of history and emergence. 
It leaves you quite breathless as you look around. It’s not even the Arts Center itself but you know that this is the emotion that Jungkook wants the guests to feel. He wants them to be in awe, to look on in excitement. 
“It’s pretty great, huh?” Yoongi asks next to you. “Worth all the hard work.”
“It is. Design and logistics did amazing in putting this together,” you say, given that you’ve spent the entire day working with both teams to set this up.
“Well, Jungkook’s vision is captivating to begin with. It really makes a difference when you’re led by a creative mind. Selling the idea won’t be so hard in a place like this.”
“I really hope so. We’re banking on the artists for exposure. There are gonna be articles about it, too. The whole process is being documented and that makes the final product much more exciting,” you explain. “I
 I actually feel really good being a part of this. I’m glad I didn’t quit after that first week.”
Yoongi laughs along with you, knowing now that that experience no longer bothers you the way it used to. But he’s glad about it, too, not only because he selfishly wants you around but even more, he knew that you needed this, that you needed to feel redeemed in Jungkook’s eyes and in yours. Yoongi hopes that as the project goes on, you’ll learn more about yourself and what you want, what you’re good at, what you can give, and what makes you happy. 
“That makes both of us. I’m sure Jungkook thinks so, too,” Yoongi replies.
“Well, we’ll never know because he’ll probably never admit it but it’s a good thought,” you smile. “As long as we maintain this unproblematic dynamic, I’m good.”
“Speaking of which, where is he?”
“On the way,” you say. “He had a meeting to attend and he said he’ll be fixing up here. He should be here in a few minutes.”
Do-hyun approaches you about the photographer and you excuse yourself, instructing Yohan next to her to lead Jungkook to the waiting room when he arrives. 
Jungkook steps into the venue and like he’d hoped, he feels the energy as he takes it all in. There’s a lot of possibility as he looks around, and that’s what he wants the guests to see. He wants the artists to envision their own pieces displayed; he wants the creatives to imagine fashion shows and photo shoots and videos that come to life; he wants people to see the potential of an Arts Center beyond just looking at art pieces.
But underneath the pride is nervousness. There will be important personalities coming today and it’s his opportunity to engage with them, to make them want to be a part of this. Talking about the details of the project would be easy; it’s connecting with them that’s a challenge. He had last week’s Appointment Dinner as a trial and like you said, he did well. It’s tonight that matters so much more to him. He supposes that what happens will set the trajectory for how the promotion of the Center will go, so making a good first impression is crucial. 
Yohan approaches him and leads him towards the waiting room where his outfit, which Taehyung had pressed and sent over here, hangs on a rack. There are two magazine publications that will feature this event and both include an interview with him and some photos. 
Jungkook starts dressing up, knowing he’ll be called for those not long from now. He looks at himself in the mirror and the uncertainty fills him again. It’s not the look he would’ve gone for but his best friend was adamant that an event like this calls for something new. With his trousers and fitted shirt on, Jungkook breathes in and out, and it’s at the same time when there’s a knock on the door and your call of his name suddenly makes him nervous. 
You enter, stopping as you shut the door, your eyes a little wide, and look at him. You’re a sight to behold in your floral-laced dress and if he was anxious seconds ago, he’s even more now.
“I knew I should’ve stuck to the classic,” Jungkook sighs at your unmoving form. 
“What—what do you mean, Mr. Jeon?” You ask, finally finding your voice. 
“You’re not saying anything,” he frowns. “Tonight probably wasn’t the best time to show up in an outfit like this.”
“And why is that?” You wonder, walking closer to him now. You try to calm your racing heart because Jungkook looking this good in a checkered flared trouser and white v-neck shirt was not something you expected. “You look
”
“Pretentious?” He chuckles, shaking his head and bending towards the mirror, his angled body making you feel even hotter.
You’ve long accepted that Jungkook is a very handsome man. It’s probably why it was more frustrating despising him and, like Soomin said, also satisfying. He’s got a perfect mix of boyish and manly features with his doe eyes and chiseled jaw; the aura of confidence and nonchalance perhaps add to that as well. It also doesn’t help that he has a really good physique, something you’d seen on his first day on the job and one you’d denied affected you. You’d gotten used to it somehow. Hard as it was to suppress those thoughts every time you fixed his tie or watched him walk about his penthouse in his gym clothes, you managed. You’ve always been professional, and you’ve always reminded yourself to not let it affect you.
But tonight, it’s just hard not to, especially with the way his biceps are popping out of those short sleeves; and if the shirt were an inch tighter, you’d probably be able to trace his toned chest and abs as well. He’s cut his hair, too, slick and pushed back as if he's starring in some western rockstar film. 
“Good
” you manage to say after what seemed like minutes. “The outfit looks good on you, sir. It’s new and fresh, not like the usual formal attire that screams ‘businessman who only wants profits.’ This is posh and stylish. It makes you look more approachable.”
“This is what would make me look approachable?” He asks incredulously.
“Actually, a smile would,” you say too quickly, earning you a laugh. “But this works, too. It fits with the theme.”
“That’s what Tae said, too,” Jungkook sighs. “He insisted that at least for these Arts Center-related events, I should dress a little more boldly and more interesting, things I definitely am not but, well, I couldn’t counter him when he said that my usual prints and styles make me look like I’m just going to a meeting or some business conference.”
“And he’s not wrong,” you point out, walking closer to him. “You don’t need anything eccentric, just something exciting. This is simple yet sophisticated.”
“Have you seen the coat?” He asks, gesturing to the rack when you say no.
“Oh. There’s a corsage,” you say, admiring the matching brown checkered piece.
“An oversized one,” he rolls his eyes. 
“It looks pretty.”
“That’s what he said, too.”
“If you don’t like it, why didn’t you tell him during the fitting?”
“I did like it but it’s Tae - he’s good at convincing people that they look good. And I probably thought that, too. But he’s not yet here and he’s gonna be late so right now, all I can think about is that I’ll look ridiculous.”
“Well, that makes one of us,” you say, surprising him. “If what I think matters, then you’d have to take my word for it. The outfit looks good. It captures people’s attention and that’s what you need. You’re just gonna have to follow this up with similar styles but that wouldn’t be a problem. Just carry yourself with confidence. It’s what Mr. Kim would say.”
“I know. He texted that same line to me five times today.”
“He’s your best friend, Mr. Jeon. I’m sure he’s looking out for your best interest.”
“True, but then again, we were forced to become friends when we were young so who knows?”
You laugh at his words. “Is that so?”
“Our fathers are best friends so we spent a lot of time together,” Jungkook shares. “We were all so different and we got on each other’s nerves but I guess that made us closer. I
 I wasn’t close to my brother so I just stuck with those who stuck around. It’s a good thing they turned out to be decent people.”
“They’re very kind, I should say.”
“Yeah. It sucks that their kindness didn’t rub off on me,” he says as he holds your gaze.
The tension rises as you look back at him. It’s hard not to fall into his eyes, and you’re thankful for the knock on the door and Yohan’s voice on the other side saying that the interviewer is ready for Jungkook now. 
“Five minutes,” you call out, breaking the moment and retrieving his last piece of clothing. 
You assist him in wearing his coat and just like reflex, you immediately fix the sleeves and adjust the corsage that isn’t actually that big. You look at him from head to toe and see Taehyung’s vision. There’s something captivating about Jungkook in this fit; it makes him intriguing and someone to look out for. You suppose that was the intention.
“Respectable enough?” He asks worriedly once you meet his eyes.
“Respectable enough,” you affirm, hoping your smile can give him the encouragement he needs. 
You open the door and let the first set of crew in. You watch on as they interview and take snapshots while your own team from the marketing department capture what’s happening as well. 
Jungkook sits cross-legged on the sofa, his eyes looking out into the distance as he absorbs the questions and thinks of his answers. He gesticulates as he responds, something you noticed him only ever do about topics that seem very important to him. He’s done it during meetings with the team and with Yoongi, and you suppose there’s that level of honesty that he shows then. His responses are thoughtful and profound, as the questions revolve around the type of art pieces to be displayed, how culture can be celebrated and respected, and what the public can look forward to once the Center is open to everyone. 
The next interviewer starts off with the practical questions before moving to the technicalities of the design and structure such as the materials used, the techniques utilized in renovating such a massive complex, and how the Center itself represents art and culture. This is when Jungkook fully relaxes. You see it in his body language, in the softness of his expressions, and in the mellow tone of his voice as he discusses in terms you don’t fully understand but somehow still make you feel like you know exactly what he’s talking about.
It’s different seeing him in this way. Your team vetted these interviewers and publications and they seem sincere about their articles and so you know they aren’t there to judge; Jungkook knows they aren’t there to scrutinize him. He’s not there to impress them or even to sell the idea; he just wants to share it, to make it known, to narrate the process of this project that may still be in its very early stages but which has lived in his mind for years.
He may not always be good with words but you can tell that he finds them when the ideas are clear to him. He’s able to articulate what he sees in his mind and there’s something captivating about that. There’s a lot you can learn from him, you think, and if what you develop after having stayed this long is even just a fraction of his creativity, then you’d feel accomplished. 
You can tell even more now how important this is to him, especially when he emphasizes the individual’s need and desire for connection and how he wants the Center to be a hub for that, or perhaps its creator. You wonder if he knows so much about it, or if, like you, it’s something he also constantly seeks. 
You’re so focused on taking him all in that you don’t notice that you’ve been staring. Your eyes fall on his fingers, waving about as he draws imaginary pictures; they land on his lips, pink and dry as they utter words that are perhaps the most he’s said, and suddenly, his voice is the most comforting it’s ever sounded to you. You look upwards and that’s when you notice it - his eyes are on you just as yours are on him yet he continues talking, and you hold onto it for a few seconds before you feel the heat reach your cheeks. It feels like a burn and you snap out of the spell-like feeling you were caught in as you turn away now and try to catch your breath.
You hadn’t meant to stare but you were drawn to him at that moment, and as he talked about how the designs reflect the tangibility yet elusiveness of human connection, you found yourself drowning in his words and in the way he said them. He’d caught you before you could look away, and you decide that the only way to go about it is to pretend it didn’t happen.
And that’s what you do, as you remain on your spot with your eyes scanning the room, no longer focused on him.
The interview ends right as Chin-sun enters to say that some guests have arrived. You instruct her to entertain them first with Manager Lee as you wrap up in here and it’s not long after when you’re left with Jungkook once again.
“Was that good?” He asks, his gaze on you as you look elsewhere.
“It was. You seemed more relaxed,” you state, unnecessarily fixing the couch to distract yourself. “That’s a good way to start the evening, Mr. Jeon. I’m sure the guests would enjoy speaking with you tonight.”
“That’s what I hope,” he replies. “I’ll need you close to me to keep track of scheduled meetings or any invitations. I’d also like them to be familiar with you as my assistant so they know who to reach out to in case I’m not available.”
“Of course, sir,” you say, turning around to face him again, suddenly feeling nervous about the intensity of his look. “I’ll take note of all those.” 
He nods then exits the room and you follow. You trail him as he starts to greet the guests one by one.
There are heads of private foundations and curators. There are creative directors from entertainment agencies and some art enthusiasts. There are artists and authors and poets, all of whom are intrigued and seemingly excited about what’s in store. 
Jungkook heads to the front after being introduced by Manager Lee and takes his time to introduce the project, utilizing the panels and all of the interiors’ walls to showcase the design virtually. He presents his plans and the role of artists, creatives, creators, and consumers. It’s a half hour speech that ends, followed by a light sit-down dinner that Jungkook takes advantage of to engage with the guests. 
He first greets the deputy minister of the arts and culture ministry and then Mr. Saito, who’d likewise brought some of his artist friends from Japan. 
You then follow Jungkook around as instructed, taking notes on your phone in between to list all the upcoming meetings and other activities scheduled on the spot. You’ve somehow developed this skill with Hoseok but it still doesn’t get any easier. The fact that so many of them want to touch base with Jungkook after his pitch says a lot about how well he did and how much it resonated with the people he wanted to connect with. 
Based on your notes, you can already tell it’s gonna be incredibly busy moving forward, and the thought suddenly makes your head hurt. But you push through, knowing there are more people to meet with, even with Chin-sun and Manager Lee entertaining half of them. 
Jungkook takes the stage again to introduce some of the artists whose works will be displayed in the Arts Center, and he gives them time to talk about their pieces and what drew them into the project. The company head whoïżœïżœïżœs been contracted to create the products for the souvenir shop also speaks, and as they share, you feel the excitement heighten. The opening is still a long time from now but things seem so clear and so certain, and you know that was because of Jungkook - because he demands the same level of excellence he practices from others, because he’s committed to his vision and he makes sure to see it through. 
More engagement takes place, and your only breather is when Jungkook decides to talk to his father and then Hoseok but after that, you’re back to following him around and running out of calling cards for people to keep and call you in the future. 
The last of the remaining guests finally leave at 10PM. You look around and the art pieces are being carefully wrapped for transport. The panels remain but Do-hyun and Yohan will be returning in the morning to pack everything up. Slowly, you start to feel the soreness creep in and the headache intensify but you shake all the pain off. There are two more days left for the week and you just have to power through them to survive. 
“You sure you don’t want me to drive you home?” Chin-sun asks as she readies to leave.
“I live on the other side of the city from you. From all of you,” you remind them. It’s really the only reason why you don’t hitch a ride with them, especially considering that they have families and pets they go home to. “I’ll be fine, don’t worry.”
“What about Yoongi?” Jungkook asks, surprising you because you thought he’d been on the phone. “Can’t he drive you?”
“He left an hour ago, Mr. Jeon,” you reply. “He has that early morning flight to Jeju tomorrow.”
“Mr. Ri can drive you home after he drops me off,” Jungkook says. “It’s too late in the night and it might be hard for you to get a cab.”
“Okay, sir. Thank you,” you mumble, waving everybody goodbye as you follow him towards the car. 
You get inside and find him sitting in the backseat, his coat removed and his head rolled back. You can tell all the socializing drained his energy again, and you’d hate to remind him that there’s a Property Expo next week that his father assigned him to attend, as well as a Partners’ Fellowship Dinner where he has to deliver another speech. You decide to do so in the morning instead and let the soft sounds of the radio soothe your mind.
“I think tonight was a success,” he mutters, prompting you to turn towards him. “Everyone I spoke to seemed excited.”
“They were,” you affirm. “They wouldn’t be scheduling meetings with you if they weren’t.”
“That’s true,” he hums. “That’s one major event down and several more to go.”
“I hope the team was able to show you how well we work together, Mr. Jeon. And that like me, they’re all on your side.”
Jungkook lets your words settle. He agrees. The team was like a well-oiled machine. Each member knew their roles and performed their tasks excellently. And there was you, of course, handling every one of his instructions and requests with grace. You looked really beautiful doing it, too, and he doesn’t know if he wants to thank or curse Taehyung for designing another dress that makes you stand out from the crowd because that’s what happened tonight - everywhere Jungkook looked, it seemed like all he could see was you.
He shakes away the thought, knowing that constantly acknowledging his attraction towards you would just make things harder for him the way that denying it would, and while he doesn’t have a solution for that either, he supposes that not acknowledging it at all would be the best option. 
So he focuses on the team instead, and he feels comforted to know that they worked hard because they knew how much tonight mattered to him, as Do-hyun expressed earlier. 
“I’m glad they are,” he finally replies. “I
 I still don’t think I’m their favorite person but as long as they don’t despise me anymore, then I’m satisfied with that.”
“They don’t,” you counter, although even you’d know that’s a half-lie.
“They do. Or did, at least,” he laughs dryly. “It’s easy to stay unnoticed outside of the team’s office, you know?”
The tinge of sadness in his eyes confirms what you’re thinking - he’s heard some of the team conversations about him. And while you’d argue that they’re not vile or anything close to that, you also know that talking about him not smiling or not expressing his gratitude are things you shouldn’t be saying behind his back. Even if they’re true.
“I”m so, so sorry, Mr. Jeon. We–”
“It’s okay, it’s not a big deal,” he interjects. “I mean, it’s not like I haven’t given you reasons to feel that way. You all did go from Hoseok to me and that’s quite the downgrade in terms of camaraderie and stuff.”
“We still didn’t have the right to say those things. And no, I’m not agreeing that you’re a downgrade,” you clarify. “Like you said, you and your cousin are very different.”
“I did. And that’s why I’m not surprised, is all I’m saying. But despite all that, the team did amazing tonight. Not like I’d expect they wouldn’t because they prefer someone more joyful or expressive, but it
 it was also nice to see them enjoying themselves. I hope you did, too.”
“It was a memorable experience, Mr. Jeon,” you say. “It’s something new. The previous projects and events we handled were either residential or commercial in nature and our creativity wasn’t pushed as far as the Arts Center is doing. And we all appreciate that, even if we may not show it.”
“That’s good. At least there’s still something that you’re all getting out of this.”
There’s a sadness in his voice that you’re hearing for the first time. You don’t know what about tonight that’s making him vulnerable and honest with you. Perhaps it’s all the talk about human connection that he seems to struggle with, and maybe he’s realizing now that even with the team performing as well as they are, there’s still something lacking in soul and emotion that he thinks is because of him. 
Whatever it is, you hope that he doesn’t let it bring him down too much. Working closely with him, you’ve come to see more of him despite his efforts to keep those layers unpeeled and you’ve come to understand him a little more. You’ve forgiven him in the process, too. The team is still adjusting and you know it’s your job to bridge that gap. You’ll just have to figure out how. 
You let the silence end the conversation, not knowing what else you can say to comfort him at this moment. But you try though, as the car stops in front of his building and you call his name right before he closes the door.
“Yeah?” He asks, looking curiously at you. 
You almost forget what you’re about to say as he’s bent forward, his arm propped on the car roof, the surrounding lights highlighting the features of his face. 
“You did great tonight, too. And I learned a lot from you. Thank you for guiding us, sir.”
He’s left speechless, as he holds your gaze for a moment before nodding and closing the door. Mr. Ri drives away and you look back to see Jungkook walk slowly towards the building entrance, briefly looking your way before disappearing inside. 
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You arrive at the office the next morning at 9AM with a splitting headache, your body dragging itself towards your chair as you try to maintain balance and get yourself together. Jungkook had messaged late last night that he was going to have a breakfast meeting with his father so you could go straight to work, and given last night’s late finish, you could come at a later time as well.
That gave you another two hours of sleep, which you were thankful for considering the terrible state you were in when you woke up. Your body felt sore and the dryness of your throat signaled that you’re about to get sick - it was just a matter of when it was going to fully kick in. It’s how your body reacts to stress, a pattern you noticed since you started working in the company. It’s usually after succeeding weeks of late nights and big events when you give in - the headaches start then the sore throat; not long after, the fever hits and you’d have to spend days just doing nothing until you’ve expelled the exhaustion away. 
On rare occasions, your mother or friends come, knowing you’d be too sick to make yourself some food. But they don’t always have that luxury. They have their own lives, too, lives that they just happen to have far away from you. But it’s why it mattered that you gave Jungkook that noodle soup when he was unwell. You know what it’s like to be sick and hungry and completely helpless, and you had a feeling that just like yourself, he’d deal with it on his own. You’ll probably have to stock up on food tonight to get you through the next few days; you just hope you haven’t completely fallen apart by then.
You take your medicines and try to focus on your tasks for this morning, scheduling meetings and screening photos from last night to be used for marketing purposes. Needing some tea, you head to the pantry and briefly check in with the team before heading back. You see that Jungkook has just arrived, as he accompanied his father to one of their project sites after their meeting. He calls you over and asks if Do-hyun and Yohan have come back from fixing things at last night’s venue.
“Yes, sir, they just got here,” you reply. “Everything’s been stored properly and Chin-sun’s working on the payments already.”
“Good,” Jungkook responds. “It’s lunchtime though, so you should all grab a meal. There’s a French restaurant that just opened a block from here. I heard it’s got great reviews, so take the team there and have them order anything they want. You can just use your card to pay but it’s under the office’s budget.”
“Okay, sir. Uhm, that sounds great,” you manage to say, excitement filling you because you spent the other night watching review videos of that restaurant on YouTube and immediately told Jimin and Soomin that you’ll be eating there when they visit you the next time. “What about you though? Aren’t you joining us?”
“I
 Well
”
“You don’t have any other scheduled meeting other than the one we’ll have as a team at 2:30.”
“I don’t have to go,” he answers. “You all worked hard and deserve to enjoy yourselves and I don’t think that’ll happen if I’m around. We can all debrief during the meeting but lunch is your time to get together and bond as a group.”
“You’re part of that group, too, Mr. Jeon. You are our boss,” you counter.
“Exactly.”
“But Mr. Ju–” you stop, not wanting to draw another comparison, which you said you’ll stop doing.
“I know. Hoseok would join you for lunch or dinner and the team enjoyed his presence,” Jungkook states. “I don’t think that’s the case with me. This isn’t me putting myself down but
 you know that I don’t really
 do things like that. I’m still learning that part of the role and I don’t want to spoil their fun.”
“You can’t really speak for the team though,” you point out.
“Well, you represent them to me. Am I wrong to assume all that?”
“No, but I think it would be a good opportunity to prove to them otherwise,” you advise.
Jungkook sighs, knowing you’ve got a point. But he insists, claiming that he’s still figuring out the team and how to relate with them. 
“I understand, Mr. Jeon,” you concede. “How about your lunch?”
“I’ll manage. You can all go ahead so you can get back on time.”
“We will. Thank you. I already know they’re going to enjoy it.”
The team is ecstatic when you tell them about lunch plans. They also only wonder about Jungkook’s presence once they’ve ordered and perhaps they’re still figuring him out, too. Much of their engagement with Jungkook is through meetings, as none of them, save for Manager Lee, feel comfortable or even free enough to just approach him. They also don’t know much about his interests or his quirks, and that puts you in the same boat as them. 
You said once that you’re not sure if you’ve gotten used to him already. Maybe slowly you are, as you look around and wish that he was here to experience this, too. Somehow you just think he’d love the duck confit dish that you eventually order for yourself. Maybe you can let him know, and he can order it on his own time. 
Lunch ends with everyone on a high from the delicious meal. Even you forget how terrible you’re actually feeling and let the laughs and scrumptious food compensate for the fatigue. 
You get back to the office and head to Jungkook as the rest of the team prepares the conference room for the meeting. You see a half-eaten sandwich on his desk and hate to think that it’s all he had while you enjoyed a fancy lunch that he ordered you all to have. He seems to pick up your thoughts as your eyes flit from him to his food and he affirms you that he’s not that hungry, given the heavy breakfast he had this morning.
“How was lunch?” He asks. 
“It was great. The food was really good. I had the duck confit that I think you’ll like and
 uh, they were asking where you were.”
“They were?” 
“Yeah,” you respond. “They were wondering why you didn’t join us.”
“What did you say?”
“That you were on a conference call,” you say. You didn’t like that you had to lie to them about it, but you also didn’t want to use that time to talk about Jungkook behind his back again. “Yohan said that it’s understandable; you’re always busy and he doubts you get a break while you’re here.”
“Oh. Well, he’s not wrong.”
“We had a good time though, and I’m sure they’ll tell you later but thank you. It’s nice seeing the team enjoy themselves. I wish you could see it, too.”
“Maybe one day,” he says sullenly, standing up right after to head to the meeting with you.
The room quiets down when you both arrive and Jungkook feels once more the shift in their disposition once he joins them. He can’t fault them for it knowing that’s because of him, but as time passes and the more he talks about the value of human connections - which the Arts Center aims to foster - the more he starts to think of exactly what he’s missing by keeping himself too far a distance from everyone else around him. 
His father tries, he can tell. Most of their breakfast or lunch or dinner meetings aren’t actually meetings, and he supposes it’s just his old man’s way of spending time with him by disguising it as something work-related, knowing that Jungkook wouldn’t be into it if it wasn’t. His mother asks him over to their house on some weekends for lunch, her own way of reconnecting with him after years of being apart, but even with that, Jungkook just gives the bare minimum. 
He doesn’t not like them; he just stopped being close to them at some point and he didn’t really care to mend it as he grew older. The women he sleeps with don’t count since he doesn’t even really talk to them, and other than Taehyung and Seokjin, and occasionally Yoongi, who keep up with his attitude, there really isn’t anyone else whom he thinks enjoys his presence enough to want to have him around. 
He doesn’t know about you though, but he makes an educated guess and thinks there’s not much of him you’d miss just like anyone, and while the thought stings a bit, it’s one he tries to live with.
“Good afternoon, Mr. Jeon,” Manager Lee greets and implores the others to do the same. “Thank you again for lunch. It was really delicious and pretty fancy. I wish I’d worn a prettier tie than the one I have right now.”
“Your tie looks fine, Manager Lee,” Jungkook replies.
“Ms. Cho said you were busy, that's why you weren’t there,” Do-hyun boldly says. “Hopefully next time you can join us. I mean, not to assume you’ll treat us again, although that would be nice, but–” 
“Do-hyun just wanted to say thank you,” Chin-sun butts in. “And that we understand you have so many things going on, Mr. Jeon, so hopefully, when you have time in the future, you can join us for a meal, too.”
“That, uh, that would be fine, yes,” he mumbles, taking his seat and avoiding looking at everyone except you. “Let’s start the meeting.”
You’re there for over two hours, rehashing the entire process, given that it’s the first event out of many that the team organized. Jungkook is generous in complimenting everyone, including you, and he gives updates on the interest generated and all the artists he’ll be meeting in their respective studios as a result. 
The Ministry of Culture minister likewise pledged support, promising a linkage with the international media festival organizers like Jungkook had hoped. You’ve all accomplished so much in so little time, but the rest of the timeline shows that there’s still so much ground to cover. You plan the next steps and then spend half an hour talking about the other small projects that the VP’s office is managing before Jungkook adjourns the meeting and orders you all to head home to get some rest while he stays behind to work some more.
You follow him this time, trying your best to be stable as you take the bus home. You manage to buy some beef bone soup on the way for dinner, and once that’s all finished and you take a long hot shower to hopefully get rid of the stress in your body, you plop down on your bed and fall asleep with no warning at all. 
You wake up in the middle of the night, your clogged nose keeping you from breathing. With puffy eyes, you search for your eucalyptus inhaler and take your medicine before going back to bed and hoping that when you wake up, you’ll feel less terrible than you do right now. 
But you don’t, as you wake up to your alarm not long after and feel even worse. Your body is sore, your head feels heavy, and it’s a struggle to even turn to your side to try to pull yourself off the bed. Knowing there’s no way you’ll manage today, you call Mr. Ri and inform him that you’re unwell and can’t make it to work. 
“I can’t even type nor talk properly right now,” you tell him. “Can you–”
“I’ll tell Jungkook, don’t worry,” he assures you. “And just to remind you, you’re sick, okay? So stay in bed, don’t do chores or anything, and don’t think about work for even a second. You hear me? And update me on how you are.”
“Yes,” you cough out. “Thank you.”
You lie underneath the covers and hope to the heavens that more sleep would make you feel a bit of relief and it does, given that when your phone rings five hours later, you don’t feel like your head is splitting apart. 
“Good, you’re awake,” Mr. Ri says on the other end after you greet him. “Can you open your door?”
“Okay, just give me a few minutes. I’m exceptionally slow this morning.”
Mr. Ri laughs but tells you to take your time. You put on a hoodie over your gray sweatpants and briefly wash your face before opening the door. 
“Work’s got to you, huh?” He asks worriedly as he stands in front of you. “Is it bad enough to warrant a visit to the hospital? I can drive you there.”
“I’ll manage,” you mumble. “But what are you doing here, Mr. Ri? Mr. Jeon has a meeting in an hour.”
“I know. But he wanted me to give you this.”
The older man initially hands you a large paper bag but decides to just place it on your table given your weak state. He removes the containers of chicken noodle soup, rice porridge, and soybean sprout soup, boxes of soft bread, and a small jar of yuja marmalade for tea. 
“What–”
“Your meals for the next few days so you don’t have to worry about preparing them,” Mr. Ri says. “Jungkook wants you to focus on resting. He wants you to take Monday off, too.”
You look at him and suddenly feel like crying. You knew that waking up, you’d be worrying about what to eat, given that you barely have ingredients to work with. You also don’t have the energy to make anything, especially something that’d help with your health. Jungkook just relieved you of that, and at a time like today, you feel what it’s like to be cared for. And though you can argue with him using his own words - your health isn’t his responsibility - you won’t pretend that it doesn’t give you comfort knowing that he’d made the effort to buy all this and have them brought to you. 
You talk a little bit more before he heads out, and you lead him to the door where you look across the street where the car is parked. Your eyes may be puffy but you don’t miss the silhouette behind that backseat window. 
“How is she?” Jungkook asks as Mr. Ri enters the car and slowly drives away.
“She looks like someone who’s been working hard these past months and in need of rest. She says it’s normal but this is probably the worst. These few days off will be good for her.”
“I hope so, too.”
“She’s thankful for the food, Jungkook,” the older man says. “I know she’d probably say you didn’t have to but I could tell it meant a lot to her. She doesn’t always ask for help, you know? It’s good you’re somehow letting her know that she can count on you when she needs you. If this is you making it up to her, you’re on the right path.”
Jungkook hums in acknowledgement, although unsure what it means for him. Is it to compensate? To apologize again? To return the favor because you’d done it first? Is it to let you know that he has your back, too, the way you’ve been showing him that you have his? 
He’s alerted by a message, your name on his screen somehow making his heart jump. It’s a text message and not one from the usual messaging app you both use for work purposes because, well, that’s really the only thing you talk about.
[From: EA Cho] Thank you, Jungkook. I really appreciate it.
It’s the use of his name. It’s the sincerity in your simple words. 
He smiles to himself. 
Whatever it means to you, he knows it means another thing to him. He doesn’t want you to feel alone. And that in the coldest nooks of his uncaring heart, he actually does care for you. For this moment, he’ll acknowledge it. For this moment, he’ll let himself feel it. He can only hope you feel it, too.
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starryevermore · 3 months
Text
celebrating you ✧ roy kent
angst cityℱ library | send in a request (consult request faqs first)
pairing: roy kent x fem!reader
summary: you’re used to no one celebrating you. but roy proves to you that he’s not like the others. 
word count: 1,486
warnings?: fluff fluff fluff, no use of y/n, not proofread
a gift for @captainsbestgal happy birthday bestie đŸ„°
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Since you’ve entered adulthood, your birthday was never anything that you put a lot of weight onto. There was something different about adult birthdays, you supposed. Something that made people not want to put any effort into celebrating others. Or, at least, something made people not want to put any effort into celebrating you. 
Ever since you finished school, it felt like you were pulling teeth just to get someone, anyone, to give you an ounce of attention and affection that they were ready to give to anyone else. Whether it be a promotion or a life milestone or your fucking birthday, it seemed like no one wanted to show up for you the way you would for anyone else. The way they would for anyone else. All of your friends would throw surprise parties and take each other out to fancy dinners whenever something great would happen. Your work would get balloons and a simple gift card for people’s birthdays. But for you? Crickets. 
Anytime you tried to bring up the difference in treatment, people acted like you were out of your mind. Surely you understood that they had busy lives? That they can’t just drop everything at the tip of a hat? That these things take time, and energy, and coordination, and they don’t always have the capacity to meet those demands. And you understood! Really, you understood more than most. Often, you were the one playing host, or the one making incredibly personalized gifts, or the one just shooting a “Happy Birthday!” text when things got busy. You understood about not always having the capacity to show up. It’s just
Odd that you were the one who always got the short end of the stick. 
Nowadays, you don’t even bother reminding anyone about your birthday or try to set something up on your own. It was too much effort, and too much heartbreak to see no one even care. 
You expected this year to be more of the same. Nothing was particularly different, except that you had a boyfriend for a few months now. But the relationship was still new, so you didn’t expect Roy to do anything special for you. But, oh, you should have. The second you had mentioned in passing that you were taking a day off work for your birthday, Roy had a plan set in motion. 
The morning of your birthday, you woke up to soft kisses being peppered across your face. Your nose wrinkled, slightly confused as to what was happening. But as you opened your eyes and saw Roy hovering over you, a goofy smile on his face, you couldn’t help but kiss him back. 
“What’s got you in such a good mood?” you asked between kisses. 
“It’s your special day. Why wouldn’t I be in a good mood?”
You pulled away for a moment, your brows knit together. This was
odd? Unexpected? But, also appreciated. “Well, aren’t I lucky, then?”
Roy kissed you again then got out of bed. You whined at the loss of warmth, reaching out and trying to pull him back into bed. He batted your hands away. “Nuh uh, none of that.”
“You can’t just wake me up with birthday kisses then take it away!”
“I can if I’m going to make you birthday breakfast while you get ready,” Roy said. But he leaned down over you and kissed you again. “Was planning on taking you to the zoo.”
Your eyes lit up. “Really? Oh my god, I love the zoo.” Then you frowned. “But you have work?”
“You’re not the only one who can take the day off, love. Now, c’mon, I got a lot planned for you today.”
You started to push yourself out of bed, watching as Roy started to leave to go get breakfast made. But, then you called out to him. As he turned,  you said, “I really appreciate you.”
“Get ready to appreciate me even more,” he teased. 
After getting dressed and eating a breakfast of your favorite foods, you and Roy headed to the zoo. You were beyond excited to go. You hadn’t been to the zoo in years, having been too busy with other aspects of your life. You had once mentioned in passing, months ago, to Roy that you were itching to go.
“I can’t believe you even remembered this,” you had said as the two of you walked around. 
Roy turned to look at you. His brows pinched together. “Why wouldn’t I remember?”
You shrugged, pointing to a monkey that was swinging around. “It was so long ago. And it wasn’t really anything that was important. I mean, I barely remember what we had for dinner last night.”
“Yeah, but what you say is important to me.”
The way he said it, the way it sounded so definite, so sure, it made your heart squeeze. God, could Roy be anymore perfect? Was it not enough that he was completely devoted to you and handsome to boot? Did he have to so considerate? You leaned your head against his arm, smiling. Out of the corner of your eye, you watched Roy take out his phone and snap a selfie of the two of you. 
“Wait, I wasn’t looking!” you giggled as he pocketed his phone. 
“But you looked beautiful.” He nodded over to a different habitat. “C’mon, I heard a kid shout that the lemurs were out.”
“Ooh, I love lemurs!”
You didn’t think the day could get any better than this. You were a bit surprised at how into the zoo Roy was. In some ways, you still had the public image of Roy painted in your head—all stoic, the traditional “masculine man”. The kind of guy that would grumble and groan at the idea of spending a day at the zoo. But Roy wasn’t like that. He was just as giddy as you, just perhaps a little less outward about expressing it. He let you pull him to every habitat you wanted to, pointing out a few that you missed. He took pictures of you—many candids where he called you the most beautiful woman in the world, as well as some posed pictures where he acted like you were walking the red carpet. Your favorites, though, were the silly selfies he would take with any animal that would wander near him. The day was so perfect. It actually made you start to like your birthday again. 
As the two of you returned home, you couldn’t stop gushing about how amazing the day was. Talking about all the things you did. Roy didn’t even mind that you were talking about things he was literally present for. He loved your little recaps of the day, even adding on things that you forgot about. Perhaps if you hadn’t been so wrapped up in excitedly talking about the day, you would have noticed the giant grin on his face as he walked you up to the house. 
“And, oh my god, the snow leopard! She was so sweet and—” you were saying as you unlocked and opened the door. 
“SURPRISE!”
You jumped back, hitting Roy’s chest. He wrapped his arms around you, swaying you side to side as you processed that the entirety of AFC Richmond, Rebecca, and Keeley (and those guys who were always at The Crown & Anchor?) were standing in the middle of the living room. You looked up at him, your eyes wide. “Did you plan this?”
“Nah, just let all these fucking idiots breaking into my house,” he teased, kissing the top of your head. 
Keeley ran up to you, throwing her arms around you. “You bet he planned this! I was practically shitting myself trying to keep it a secret, because, I was so upset you didn’t even tell me your birthday was coming up, babes! But I couldn’t even reveal I knew without revealing everything, and I think Roy would have killed me—”
“I wouldn’t have killed you,” Roy protested. 
She waved him off. “Anyways, come in! You have got to see the cake Rebecca got you. It’s fucking gorgeous. I mean, something straight out of a magazine!”
Keeley grabbed your hand, dragging you into the house. As you were pulled away from Roy, you threw one last glance at Roy, a wide smile on your face. “I love you, you big softie!”
“Oi, don’t just go shouting that! I got a fucking reputation to uphold!” he laughed. 
“So I shouldn’t post your selfie with the elephant?”
Will’s, who practically materialized beside you as if you were hiding in the boot room, eyes lit up. “Ooh, can I see that photo?”
Roy chased after you, growling lowly. “You’re fucking lucky it’s your birthday.”
You laughed. 
Hmm. Perhaps you liked your birthday after all. All it took was someone showering you in the attention you deserved. Yeah. Yeah, you weren’t going to let Roy go after this. 
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yxngbxkkie · 5 months
Text
school boy crush (h.j)
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hello!! đŸ©· i was watching the mv for gone away and thought about this idea for hanji! đŸ„° i hope you guys really like it đŸ„č
feedback is greatly appreciated đŸ„°
Chan and Jisung walk through the doors of their favorite coffee shop. "How do you feel about doing a writing session later?" Jisung asks the older member, quickly looking up at him.
"Yeah, for sure. You already asked Bin about it?" Chan mentions while the two wait in line.
Jisung nods his head in response, typing a message to the other member as they speak. "Of course, I did. It wouldn't be a 3RACHA writing session if Changbinnie wasn't there," he laughs, locking his phone after sending the text.
Chan laughs and agrees with his statement. He steps up to the cashier before giving his order. "You want coffee?" He asks Jisung, quickly glancing back.
"Yes, please," Jisung answers politely, offering him his card. Chan shakes his head, telling Jisung that he's got it. "You bought it last time. Let me do it, hyung."
"Fine, fine," Chan sighs and grabs the card from his hands.
After paying for the drinks, the two members move towards the pick-up counter. Both Chan and Jisung scroll through their phones as they wait for their drinks to be ready. Three loud knocks on the window startle the two members, and they look back to see you standing outside the café.
You wave at them before rushing into the coffee shop. "Hi, Chan! Hi Hanji!" You greet them with a quick hug.
Jisung's heart starts pounding in his chest, the scent of your perfume reaching his nose. "Hi," he whispers, wishing the hug you gave him lasted a smidge longer.
"I thought you were busy today," Chan mentions after greeting you.
"Yeah, I thought I was too," you scoff, rolling your eyes. The barista calls out Chan's name, and the brunette holds a finger up to stop you, turning to grab their drinks.
He hands Jisung his before the three of you walk out of the café. "So, what happened?" Chan asks.
The three of you walk down the street together, the two members slowly sucking down their drinks. "This fucking guy messaged me this morning and said that he couldn't make it," you inform him while crossing your arms over your chest.
"Really?" Chan groans, shaking his head. "I told you he wasn't good for you."
Jisung looks between the two of you, staying silent in the conversation. "I know, but I thought he'd be different," you sigh, tilting your head back.
The younger member's heart clenches in his chest at the sight of you. "Well, listen," Chan pipes up, snapping Jisung from his gaze. "We don't have anywhere to be for a couple of hours. Why don't we do some shopping?"
"I don't want to intrude," you mention to them, your eyes dancing between the two members.
"You're not," Jisung intervenes, holding a hand out. He smiles softly at you and tears his gaze from you, feeling his cheeks warm up. "I promise."
"Okay," you cave, grinning widely.
Chan and Jisung look at one another before returning their eyes to you. "Great!" Chan excitedly says, clapping his hands together. "Let me go call our driver. I'll be right back."
Jisung watches as Chan walks back into the coffee shop, not wanting the noisy streets to disrupt the phone call. You stand beside Jisung with your hands shoved into your pockets.
A part of you wishes you could talk to him more. You think he's a really cool guy, after all the stories Chan has told you. But, every time you get the chance, you get nervous.
"I'm sorry," Jisung says suddenly, getting you out of your head. You glance up at him as he keeps his gaze on the sidewalk. "About that guy ditching you. He's an idiot."
Your heart flutters in your chest, and you release a deep breath. "It's okay," you reassure him. "It's his loss."
He nods his head in agreement, taking a quick glance at you. "Definitely," Jisung chuckles before taking a sip of his coffee.
You make eye contact with one another, and both of you look away just as fast. You press your lips together as Chan rejoins you.
"Okay," he mentions, shoving his phone into his pocket, "Skijigi said he'll be here in five minutes."
"Are you sure you guys want to spend part of the day with me?" You ask the two of them while you wait.
Both Chan and Jisung scoff at your question, making your eyes widen. "We couldn't be more sure right, Hannie?" Chan nudges the member's shoulder.
"Right, for sure," Jisung agrees, running a hand through his hair.
A black SUV pulls up to the curb, and Chan walks to the vehicle first. He opens the back door before greeting the staff members inside. Jisung gets into the vehicle next, and you follow closely, sliding in afterward.
Your thigh brushes against Jisung's, and you swear you could combust right here. You place your hands in your lap as the two members start to look through their phones again.
You find yourself looking back and forth from Jisung to what's going on outside. The ride to the nearest shopping center, thankfully, doesn't take that long. You're not sure how much longer you can take being in close proximity.
Once the car parks outside of the large building, you quickly get out. You tuck some hair behind your ear as the other two get out after. Chan leads the three of you into the shopping mall, and you thank him while walking past him.
"You doing okay?" Chan asks as you walk around.
You hum and nod your head. "Yeah, I'm alright," you tell him while lifting your head.
"Han didn't offend you or anything while I was on the phone?" He questions, intentions of scolding his member in mind. "Because the two of you are acting a little strange."
"No, no, God no," you shake your head, resting a hand on Chan's arm. "He just
 he makes me a little nervous."
A knowing smirk grows on Chan's lips as he glances towards Jisung. "He does? I didn't know that," he giggles, nudging you lightly.
You roll your eyes, and you shove him. "Shut up!" You laugh a little too loud, capturing Jisung's attention.
He eyes the two of you cautiously before looking forward again. The smile on your lips drops after noticing the sad look in his brown eyes.
"Don't tell him I told you this," Chan whispers into your ear as you all walk into a store, "but you make him nervous too."
Your breath hitches in your throat as you look back up at him. "I do?" You whisper.
"One hundred percent," he giggles.
From where you're standing, you can see Jisung looking through the men's section. Your hands are still on the clothes you're looking through when his eyes meet yours. You smile at him before looking back at the clothes.
"You two would be cute," Chan hums, teasing you lightly.
"I hate you," you laugh, shoving the older member away from you.
Chan giggles some more before walking away from you. You smile to yourself as you find an article of clothing you really like. It's a pair of baggy jeans, something you've been trying to get into recently.
"These are so cute," you whisper to yourself while toying with the price tag, checking it. A gasp leaves your lips, and you put them back, not being able to afford them right now.
"Whatcha looking at?" Jisung whispers, startling you from your thoughts.
You jump in your spot, taking a couple of steps to your right. Jisung smiles softly at you while glancing towards the pair of jeans.
"I found these jeans I like, but I just
 can't afford them right now," you chuckle nervously, shuffling your hair.
"I'm sure Chan would get them for you," he mentions while checking them out as well.
You shake your head, and you begin to walk away. "I can't ask him to do that. I'll just wait on them," you tell him, motioning for him to follow.
Jisung watches you leave the store, meeting up with Chan. He makes sure you're distracted before grabbing the jeans you were admiring.
~
Hyunjin's hands cover your eyes as he leads you blindly into their dorm. Giggles leave your lips while you hold both of your hands out, making sure not to run into anything.
“Is this necessary?” You ask aloud, attempting to turn to look at Hyunjin.
“Yes! Hush now,” he says with a light huff. “On three, you can open your eyes.”
You nod your head, and Hyunjin begins to count down. As soon as he says one, your eyes open.
“Surprise!” The rest of the members stand in the kitchen, a cute cake sitting on the table.
Your jaw drops as your eyes instantly find Chan's, knowing it was his idea. He walks up to you first and brings you into his chest.
“Happy Birthday, Y/N,” Chan smiles, messing up your hair a bit.
A groan leaves your lips, and you playfully push him away from you. You fix your hair and thank them, leaning forward to blow the candle on the cake out.
“You guys didn't have to do this,” you mention while Jisung grabs a few gift bags.
He sets them on the coffee table, motioning for you to sit down. “We wanted to,” Jisung smiles at you and sits next to you.
Your cheeks hurt from smiling so much, feeling really grateful to have friends like them. You thank the members before grabbing one of the gift bags.
The gifts begin to pile beside you, having one more gift left. “I still think you guys didn't need to buy me anything,” you chuckle while grabbing the small card, noticing that it's from Jisung.
“Well, Chan wouldn't let us be the gift,” Seungmin jokes, sitting on the arm of the chair.
Chan smacks the back of his head playfully, telling the younger member to shush. “You're an important person in our lives. You deserve to let us treat you,” Chan explains with a smile.
You smile widely while opening the card in your hands. You read the sweet message he wrote on it, finding yourself blushing a bit. You glance towards Jisung and see him holding out a medium-sized gift.
A quiet thank you comes from your lips, tucking the card back into the envelope. You grab the wrapped gift from him before gently opening it. “Jisung,” you gasp at the sight of the jeans you wanted.
“Happy Birthday,” he whispers loud enough for you to hear.
“Thank you again,” you smile at him, leaning forward to kiss his cheek.
His cheeks blush, and he looks down at his lap after you pull away. You pull the pair of jeans out from the gift box, showing the other members.
“Oh, those are so cute!” Hyunjin mentions while reaching for them. “Jisung, you bought this?”
Hyunjin's eyes dance towards the younger member. Jisung raises his head and clears his throat. “Y-Yeah, after noticing how much Y/N wanted them,” he explains, wondering how red his face is.
Your heart flutters in your chest as you look back at Jisung. “I love it,” you tell him, nudging his arm with yours.
“I'm glad,” he whispers to you again, moving to rest his hand on your leg.
“Boys,” Chan says, capturing everyone's attention. “Why don't we go get some wine to celebrate?”
The others start to agree, and you watch the seven of them walk towards the door to their apartment. Jisung stands up from the couch, and Chan stops him.
“Stay here and keep the birthday girl company,” he mentions with a smirk, causing Jisung's eyes to widen slightly.
You look between Jisung and Chan before chuckling softly. “They'll be back soon,” you reassure Jisung, patting the seat next to you.
He sits back down beside you as the front door shuts. Silence fills the apartment, and you start to gather your gifts in one pile, picking up the wrapping paper.
“You like what you got?” Jisung asks after a few minutes, his eyes on you.
You nod your head while sitting back down, patting his thigh gently. “I do. I appreciate you guys so much,” you mention with a sigh. You rest your head against the back of the couch, admiring his side profile. “Can I ask you something?”
“Of course,” he says, turning his head towards you.
“Did you buy the jeans when we went shopping? Is that why you took so long?” You question.
He nods his head in answer, adjusting his seating position. “You looked so defeated when you saw the price. I just wanted to make you happy,” Jisung explains, his boba eyes meeting yours.
“You make me so happy,” you sigh, reaching a hand out to comb it through his hair.
“Really?”
You nod your head and glide your hand down to his cheek. You stroke the supple skin before leaning in. You can hear his breath hitch in his throat, and your heart beats wildly against your chest.
“Is it okay if I kiss you?” You ask him, not wanting him to be uncomfortable.
“God, please,” he mumbles.
You giggle and connect your lips with his. A groan comes from him as he immediately kisses you back. The kiss doesn't last for long, Jisung pulling back after a minute or so.
“I like you a lot,” he rambles, resting his forehead on yours.
“I couldn't have guessed,” you tease him, giggling before kissing the tip of his nose. He scoffs playfully, pushing you lightly. You wrap your arms around his neck, bringing him back towards you. “I like you too, Han Jisung. So, so, so much.”
~
tagging: @strawboorybunny @reddesert-healourblues @spacegirlstuff @moon0fthenight @foxinnie8 @like-a-diamondinthesky @prettymiye0n
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catt-leya · 1 year
Note
Hey again!❀
I don't know if you are taking any requests but I have something in mind so if you have time to write I would appreciate it. So the thing is that can you write a smut about Rick asking the reader to choose between him and Spencer and Rick is "torturing" the reader by not letting cum only if the reader is choosing him. I hope you understand what I think about.
Sending my best wishes love!❀❀❀
Thank you!đŸ„°â€ïžâ€ïžđŸ„°
01/05
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rick grimes x fem!reader
warnings: age gap, orgasm denial, slight daddy kink, praise kink, claiming and my usual smutty stuff
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Grinning, you look up at your counterpart, "Really?" He nods and your grin, if it's even possible, widens.
"Yes, really. It's a surprise. I can show you if you want," with a glint in his eye, he reaches out and pulls you closer so he can put an arm around your shoulders, "What do you say? Shall we go right now?"
He's a lot taller and you have to tilt your head to look him in the pretty eyes, "I just need to give a quick shout out so someone can take my shift. But that shouldn't be a problem."
Before he opens his mouth, you already know he'd tease you about having to give notice first, "Oh do you have to ask Daddy again before you can come with me?" Lovingly mockingly at you, you snort, "Stop calling him that...it's weird." And avert your eyes so he can't see you blush.
"Well, you always run to him first before you go anywhere and from the age it would fit", you don't have to be an expert to realize that he doesn't like the man you're going to before. But that's something he's going to have to come to terms with, and you squirm out of his arms to wink at him, "I'll be right back. I promise."
You can tell he's annoyed by this, but you're already sprinting to the gorgeous house you're spending an incredible amount of time in.
Panting, you push open the door without knocking and call out, "Rick? Are you there?"
"Upstairs," your leader's deep voice is hard to miss and you jog up the stairs to find him in the bedroom.
Hearing you, he lifts his eyes from the drawer he's rummaging in and asks, "What's up, sweetheart?" 
At your pet name, your grin widens and you try not to think about the fact that Spencer hates it when Rick calls you that. 
Since long before you met Spencer, Rick has been calling you that and somehow you think it's cute and when he says it in a very definite way, when his voice drops an octave and his southern drawl widens, you blush.
"Could someone take my shift? I'd like to go out," you look at him pleadingly as he lowers his blue eyes again and continues to rummage through the drawer, "You want to go out? Who are you going with?"
"So that's a yes?" you tug your shirt into place and step into the room as Rick sighs softly and pushes the drawer shut to lay against it with his arms crossed, "Yeah, ask Sasha. She wanted to take more shifts anyway," his eyes slide over your body, "Who do you want to go out with?"
You walk up to his bed and sit on it, "With Spencer." 
As you expected, it stays silent. 
Just as Spencer doesn't like Rick, Rick doesn't like Spencer either. 
Actually, there's no reason for that, but somehow there is, and now you can see his whole body tense up, so you gently ask, "What are you looking for?"
You run the flat of your hand over the soft fabric of Rick's bed sheets and his gaze is fixed on your hand, "Just something I brought with me on my last run. I could have sworn I put it in the drawer." His voice is oddly occupied and you clear your throat quietly, "I can help you find-" 
"No!"
You wince and immediately Rick relents, "Sorry, I just mean you're dating Spencer, aren't you?" Every word drips with contempt towards Spencer and you slowly stand up, "Yeah, I am. Thanks again."
Heart pounding, you walk toward the door and as you arrive in the doorway, you hear Rick's raspy voice, "Wait."
You stop without turning around and feel him come up close behind you, "Sorry, sweetheart."
There it is.
That deep and dripping with accent way of saying 'sweetheart'.
A shiver goes down your spine and his scent surrounds you as he comes even closer and puts his hands on your hips, "I'm sorry I was such an asshole."
His hands feel big and warm on your body and you stare at your feet. It's not that it feels uncomfortable or wrong. 
No. 
But, unfortunately, sometimes too good, and Rick notices that too.
Immediately your body relaxes and he dares to do something he's never dared to do before.
He pulls you to his chest and leans forward to whisper in your ear, "Forgive me."
His lips graze the shell of your ear ever so slightly, but it feels like he's setting you on fire. Rick has never been a man to shy away from touching you, but never...like this.
Your back is pressed against his hard chest and you barely dare move as you breathe, "Rick-"
"Do you forgive me, sweetheart?" at the words his lips graze your neck and you gasp, "Yes." Your cheeks burn and the shame of sounding so breathless doesn't make it any better.
If you only knew how fast Rick's heart is beating at this exact moment. 
His hands get sweaty and he forces himself not to pull your ass harder against him, letting you go instead, "Thank you."
You stop a step forward and turn to face your leader, your cheeks flushed. 
Lord, how gorgeous he is. 
His blue shirt makes his eyes light up and you can barely look him in the face as he purrs, "Go ahead. I'll let Sasha know."
Your eyes are huge as you stare at him, completely lost, "Where do you want me to go?" 
And that's when he sees it.
Sees you completely forget about Spencer and your body leans back toward him. 
It gives his confidence a huge boost and he grins widely, "Sweetheart, what's going on in that pretty little head of yours?" He taps his finger against your forehead and you tear your gaze from his eyes to focus, "That's right, I have to go see Spencer."
You take another step back and awkwardly brush your hair out of your face.
Tilting his head, he watches you hurry down the stairs like he's going to pounce on you any second and he shakes his head, chuckling.
As soon as he hears you pull the door shut behind you, he goes back into his room and pulls open the drawer again.
He's sure he put it in here and now he really can't find it.
When he went to the store he almost died to get it and now it's gone.
Fucking hell, he knows you'd love it.
Groaning, he drops onto his bed where you looked so pretty before and the back of his head lands on a little bulge.
Immediately he's back on his feet and yanks back the covers, groaning in disbelief as he looks into the beady eyes of the little fluffy stuffed dog.
Why the hell did he put it under the covers?
At least now he doesn't have to turn the whole house upside down and maybe he can give it to you today. 
Rick takes a quick look out the window and sees Spencer pulling you into his arms at that exact moment and he wants to throw up.
Without letting go of you, Spencer leads you to the gate and grins widely at you, "You're going to love it."
Less than an hour later, you step out of the car and can't believe what you're seeing. Spencer has actually taken you to a carnival.
A carnival!
"Oh my God," your eyes get huge and you shake with joy, "How did you find this?"
Spencer places his hand low on your back and he smiles at you, "I found it in passing and I thought you might like it."
At one point you remark in passing that you used to visit every carnival you could find and that was your favorite thing to do.
You can hardly believe he remembered that, and with his warm hands on your body, he leads you from booth to booth until you arrive at your favorite.
The cans are still set up there and Spencer's hand slides to the back of your neck, "Would you like to try?"
His voice is soft and very different from Rick's. 
In general, he's completely different from Rick and yet you get the feeling that he'd like to be like Rick or even better. 
That's the case with most people in Alexandria, and you're pretty sure Rick doesn't even know he's adored like that.
Lost in thought, you grab a ball and toss it to the cans as if by remote control. 
They all collapse and you turn to Spencer with a smile, "I haven't lost it."
"Let me try," he pushes you aside and grabs a ball himself to throw at the next pyramid of cans, only he only manages the top three and then shrugs, snorting, "It's a piece of cake."
You realize he's just ego-crushed because you're better at it than he is, but you shrug anyway and mutter, "I'll just pick out a stuffed animal for a minute, then we can move on."
As you take a step behind the counter, he grabs your arm and grumbles, "Oh stop it. That's just for little kids who are desperate to get something out of the carnival. You're a woman, not a toddler anymore."
Blushes of shame reach your cheeks because you really would have liked to pick out a stuffed animal. 
Not just as a prize, but as a little reminder that Spencer brought you here. 
A simple keepsake.
But now you dare not bring it up again, lest you be further embarrassed, and instead mutter, "Okay. We should get back."
The mood on the drive back is oppressive, and when you're finally back in Alexandria, you can breathe again. 
Without consciously controlling it, you search the yard with your eyes for Rick, and when you don't see him, you come to the conclusion that if he hasn't gone out himself, he must be in the house.
Quietly clearing your throat, you look to Spencer, "Thanks for the great surprise. Will I see you tomorrow?"
A hint of disappointment flashes in his eyes, "I thought you could still come over. Talk a bit and...well you know."
Oh and how you know. 
Even in the beginning he tried to get you into bed, but every time you rejected him. 
It just doesn't feel right. 
Especially when you're not togetherl.
So you shake your head, "I'm sorry, but I'm tired and I want to go see Rick for a minute and see if everything worked out with my shift."
"Of course...Rick," his tone is odd and you frown, "Why do you say it like that?"
He spreads his arms wide, "All I hear is Rick this and Rick that. You're completely obsessed with the guy and quite frankly it's sick the way he looks at you. The guy is fucking old and ogling you like he's already fucking you in his mind. Like I said, sick."
You open your mouth but he just keeps talking, "Every time I want to do something with you, you run to him first and I'm not blind either. I see him pawing at you and you absolutely don't mind, and that fucking pet name he always calls you makes me want to ram it up his ass."
With your mouth open, you stare at him as he hisses in conclusion, "I'm not up for competing with that guy when any blind man can see I'm the better choice. Better than an old and insane sack of shit. But please just run to him. Instead of sleeping with me and having the best sex of your life, you can go there and let the deranged one fuck you like a cheap whore."
He spits the last words in your face and leaves you standing there in disbelief.
Never before has anyone spoken to you like that, and never before have you had tears in your eyes by word.
Slumped over, you look after Spencer, not daring to look to see if anyone overheard the scene, and walk to the house where you would always go.
Even now you don't knock and just pull the door open, only to run head-on into Rick's chest, "Ufff, slow down, sweetheart."
Gently he grabs your shoulders and you look up at him, "Hi."
Just one look at your face is all it takes to pull you into the house and haul you onto the couch, "What happened?"
Silently, you look at him, thinking of Spencer's words. 
It's true that you often talk to Rick before you go out. But that's because you don't want Rick to schedule you somehow while you're not in Alexandria, and yes, you don't mind Rick touching you and don't understand the problem with his hand resting on your hip every now and then, or brushing something off your cheek. 
You just don't understand why he sees himself in competition with Rick.
With his arms crossed, he stands in front of you and you stare at him like he just fell out of the sky. 
Sighing, he drops to his knees and mumbles as softly as he can, "Please tell me what happened?"
Your head is spinning and you lower your gaze to his hands, now on your knees, "I wanted a stuffed animal." 
"What?" he frowns in confusion and you say quietly, "Spencer took me to the carnival. It was gorgeous and at one booth I wanted a stuffed animal because I was dropping all the cans, so he called me childish. Rick, all I wanted was a rabbit or something. Other than that, I'm not a kid anymore."
You want to sound grown up with the words, but they're just whiny and you're ashamed of them, but Rick gently squeezes your knees, "Sweetheart, you're a great woman. Believe me no one sees you as a child here. I don't see you as a kid."
His hands slide to your thighs, "And as for the stuffed animal...wait a minute."
You blink and he's gone before reappearing with a small stuffed dog and holding it out to you, "For you."
Perplexed, you take the dog in your hand, "Where did you get that?"
He bends over and lifts you by the waist a bit to make room for himself and also sits on the couch, "That was the thing I couldn't find today. Saw the dog on a run and wanted to give it to you."
Spencer didn't even want you to take one for yourself and Rick comes back alone with a stuffed animal for you. 
You don't know what to say, so Rick grumbles, "That wasn't all that went on, was it?"
You shake your head and he puts a tanned arm around your shoulder to pull you closer, "Tell me."
Your voice is unfamiliarly thin as you murmur, "When I wasn’t going home with him somehow it blew a fuse or something."
Immediately Rick stiffens and hisses, "Did he touch you? If so, I'll cut his balls off and ram them down his throat."
Immediately you shake your head, "No, no. He didn't. He just said such nasty things."
Rick's body warms your side, "What did he say?"
You close your eyes as you think about it again, "You know, I don't know him like that. He's usually a great guy, but as soon as I mention you in any way, he gets so...weird."
"What did he say?" anyone in their right mind would run away at his words squeezed with anger, so you cling to the dog and whisper, "He wouldn't want to fight you for my attention when he'd be the better choice." 
In the back, you explain, "I just don't understand why he sees you as competition, you know."
Your fingers dig into the soft fabric from the dog as you swallow hard and continue with your eyes knitted to the floor, "Otherwise he would never say something like that to me, but then in the end he got all ticked off and said it was sick because you're so much older than me, but if I'm not going to have the best night of my life with him, then I should let you fuck me like a cheap whore."
Silence.
Dead silence.
"He called you a cheap whore?" he emphasizes the words strangely softly and you lift your head to look him in the blue eyes, "Yes."
"I'll kill him," he's already jumping to his feet when you grab his hand and look at him with wide eyes, "Please stay. I'm sure he didn't mean it."
Rick's hands are clenched into fists, "That guy isn't even worth looking at you. Shit, I'm gonna kick his ass so hard he'll never walk again and then he can see what competition I am to him."
He hisses, "He has no idea how easily I could get you off of him."
You blink and he snatches his hand away, "I only accepted him around you because he made you happy. Now let him even try to breathe in your direction and he'll wish he'd never called you a whore."
His whole body is shaking with tension and you're trying to sort out his words when he looks you straight in the face and growls, "Damn, you're a grown woman and it might not be much to look at that I'd like to fuck you even though you're only in your early twenties and I'm more than twice that age, but I'd show you enough respect if you'd let my cock between your legs."
Spencer is completely oblivious as you whisper, "You want me?"
Rick is so wound up and full of adrenaline that he's not even thinking about what he's saying right now, and his mouth is faster than his head, "Of course. I've wanted you for years. Every time you say something cute I want to put my dick in your mouth and every time I see you I want to bend you over the kitchen counter and fuck you dumb because I know how smart you are otherwise. Shit, what I'd give to fuck you until you can't form a single word and you're lying under me like a doll, taking me inside you. Over and over again."
You just stare at him and as you gaze into each other's eyes, you can tell exactly when he realizes what he just admitted.
His body goes limp and he brushes his hair out of his forehead, "Fuck, I shouldn't have said it like that."
Like a broken circuit board, you say, "You want me."
Suddenly, a lot of things make sense.
Why Spencer is always so annoyed when you mention Rick. 
Why you've never seen Rick with anyone who was more than a friend to him. 
Why Rick always gave you preferential treatment and also why he could hardly keep his hands off you. 
He wants you and from the looks of it not just because of purely physical attraction, because he's trying to save the day again, "Not that I think about fucking you all the time. Yeah, granted, I think about it more often than is healthy, but I respect you and shit yeah, I adore everything about you. You're smart and so incredibly soft that I'd love to be near you all day, and yes, I brought you the stuffed dog so you'd look at me with wide eyes and thank me."
You remain silent.
Defeated, Rick drops down on the couch next to you and grumbles, "Please say something."
Your gaze slides to the dog in your hand and you think of all the times Rick has held you. 
All the times he's offered you his food and all the times he's put you on his shoulders so you could see the wild horses over a high fence.
You bend down and set the dog on the coffee table and turn to Rick, "Thank you for telling me that, Rick."
Your heart is pounding in your throat as you lean in to give him a kiss on the cheek, but at the last second Rick turns his head a little and your lips are on his.
You didn't want to take it to the extreme and press a sweet smack on his cheek, but now it's his soft lips pressing against his.
An overwrought sound comes from your throat, but you don't pull back either, returning the kiss instead.
A quiet thought forms in your mind that it's unfair to Spencer for you to kiss Rick, but you push it away because you're not with Spencer. 
After all, you haven't even kissed. 
Not that he hasn't tried, but you never wanted to.
It's different now. 
Yes, in the first second you had no choice, but now in this moment, you could just move away from him and leave, but instead you open your lips and let his tongue into your mouth.
When he realizes you're not backing away, Rick grabs your soft hips and pulls you onto his lap so you're sitting astride his thighs and he doesn't have to lower his head as far to kiss you.
Your hands grip his shoulders tightly and you sigh softly into the kiss as you taste him on your tongue.
Shit, he's such a good kisser, you don't like the thought of where he learned it.
Over your hips, he slides his hands up until they slide under your shirt and he can lay them flat on your ribs and you shakily pull away from him, gasping for air.
With huge eyes you stare at his swollen lips, "Rick...I..."
He sees how unsure you are and lowers his voice until it's just a soft whisper, "Do you want me to go on, sweetheart?"
With his lips slightly parted, he looks at you and you can't take your eyes off his gorgeous face. 
His blue eyes shining with arousal and his dark curls framing his face.
You lift your hands and run one through his hair and the other you place on his gray beard and run your thumb over his lower lip.
Fluttering his eyes shut and tugging at his curls, he complies with a groan and you whisper, "Yes. Please go on."
Sluggishly, he opens his eyes and slides his hands a little higher so his thumbs graze the underside of your boobs, "Come here."
You lean forward until he bridges the last few inches and your lips are reconnected.
Gently, he cups your boobs with his big rough hands and you push through your back, whimpering. 
It feels so good to be touched by him in this way.
So good that you start to rub against him and moan against his lips, "You're so good."
"I know," his growl is deep and confident and the spot between your legs gets ridiculously wet.
Rick lets you take what you need and you grind yourself more and more greedily against the growing bulge in his crotch, growling against your lips, "Wanna be my good girl?"
With a jerk he thrusts his hips at you and his hardening cock presses hard against just the right spot and you howl, "Yes."
He helps you press your hips harder against him and places his soft lips on your neck, "Then choose me."
Groaning, you tug at his hair and cock your head to the side, "What?"
"Choose me instead of Spencer. Be mine and I'll make you come," he bites your neck and you gasp, "I don't belong to anyone."
One last time he pulls you back against his chest before stopping your movements, "Okay."
Irritated, you whimper, "Why won't you let me continue?"
Cockily, he juts his chin, "Lie on your back."
Your orgasm was close. 
So incredibly close that you had already squinted your eyes and your whole body had tensed, but now everything inside you just feels soft and weak, so you do as he says, believing that he would then continue.
Kneeling between your legs, he pushes your dress over your hips and then leans forward to kiss your thigh, "You know-" He kisses your other thigh, but now much closer to the soft warm spot between your legs, "If you were mine-" You press your head into the couch and your breathing becomes shallow as you feel his breath on the damp fabric of your panties, "Then everything would be easy."
With parted lips, he presses a kiss to your twitching pussy and your hips jerk toward him, "I'm not an object that's either Spencer's or yours."
A glance down makes you moan because his dark curls look so incredibly wicked between your legs and his hands are firmly on your hips.
He is strong. 
So incredibly strong that you can barely move as he licks you over the fabric of your panties and murmurs, "If you say so."
His beard scratches across the soft skin of your thighs and your hands fly into his hair to push his head further between your thighs, making him laugh vibrantly, "You're so pretty when you need me so bad, sweetheart."
Your pet name makes you tremble and he starts sucking on your clit. 
As he moves slightly, he pushes your knees further apart with his shoulders and a strangled cry comes from your lips as the knot in your stomach forms and you finally-.
Rick breaks away from you and looks up at you from between your legs, "Whose are you?"
Your mouth drops open and you're unable to say anything. 
He actually means it. 
Regardless of the wet accident between your legs, he really does possess the balls to claim you in this way and fuck, it turns you on.
Silently, you stare at him, and he takes the wet fabric between his fingers, only to have it shoot out onto your pussy. 
You wince and whimper, "Don't be so cruel."
Grinning, he repeats the process, "I'm not. It's a simple decision that involves my cock in your cunt or getting you out of the house dressed again. It's entirely up to you."
Your whole body is on fire and you whimper, "Don't do this to me."
He pulls your panties aside and licks once through your wetness from bottom to top. 
Briefly you black out and he growls, "Fuck you taste better than I thought you would."
Having you trembling beneath him is everything he's dreamed of for so long, and he's sure you've chosen him, or you certainly wouldn't be clinging to his curls so tightly that he's worried you'll rip them out, but he wants to hear it. 
He wants you to say you're his.
Tearfully, he presses his nose hard against your swollen clit and the soft pleading words on your mouth are music to his ears. 
With his tongue he licks over your wet lips and presses against your entrance, while he keeps nudging your clit with his nose, making you moan and groan.
When he notices your body tense up again, he wants to move in, but you squeeze your thighs together around his head and push him into your wet pussy, "Don't you dare stop now."
Giggling, he tries to catch his breath as you nearly choke him, "Say you're mine and you get my cock. That's what you want, isn't it?"
His blue eyes light up and you know you've been his for a long time. 
Longer than you've admitted to yourself. 
Longer than you probably should.
He sticks his tongue just a little between your tight walls and you cry softly, "I choose you, Rick. I'm yours."
You squint your eyes, "Oh God, I'm yours. Yours."
"I figured as much," he pushes your legs off his head and reaches down to free his cock.
Thick and hard, he waits for you to open up for him to split you.
Briefly, you think about how you can't remember the last time you had sex with a man, and Rick pushes over you, bracing himself so his weight doesn't crush you.
His eyes bore into yours and he growls dangerously low, "You're mine. Only mine, and don't you dare let anyone else touch you."
Gently you reach for his cheeks, "Rick, all my life I've only let you touch me."
It's true. 
The way he could move his hands freely over your body, no one else could.
Shuddering, he takes a breath and points his cock in front of your dripping wet cunt. 
Your fingers brush his hairy cheek again as he presses a tiny inch into you and murmurs harshly, "God, have mercy. I won't last long, sweetheart."
You are so soft and warm under him and feel so incredibly tight and good around his cock.
But in fact it could be any pussy, but what really makes his heart race are your huge eyes with which you stare at him and the soft whimpering that comes in the form of his name over your lips. 
The pure trust that you show him.
He continues to push his cock between your wet walls and exhales heavily, "You need to relax, sweetheart, or I won't fit in your pretty cunt."
"Rick...you're too big..." when he talks like that it certainly doesn't help you relax and he presses harder into you, "Relax. It'll fit. That's what you have a cunt for, isn't it? Has only the function to be fucked by my cock."
He leans forward, "And maybe give birth to my child someday."
Moaning, you push yourself towards him and he pushes himself into you to the hilt. 
He's so thick and twitching inside you that you can barely keep your eyes open, and then he breathes softly, "Come closer."
Immediately he leans in and kisses you softly on the lips as he pulls out of you slightly and then thrusts into you again.
The stretch is unfamiliar and you cling to his hips with your legs, "Rick-" Your voice breaks and he rolls his hips against your pelvis, "I know, sweetheart. I know. I got you."
Your small hands clench around his shoulders and you search for purchase as he slowly fucks you. 
Pushing each thrust deep inside you as you feel your pussy clench rhythmically around him.
Your body trembles under his and he settles lower on you so that you feel more of his weight on you and his closeness relaxes you more and more, "You feel so good."
A jolt goes through his body and he growls against your ear, "Yeah? Did you imagine it like this?"
He fucks you harder now and you moan his name. 
Your orgasm is getting closer and closer and you feel Rick's body start to shake too. 
It's a unique feeling to feel him losing control and his thrusts becoming more erratic, "Cum, sweetheart. Cum for me. Show me how much you want me."
You press your head into the pillows beneath you and give a long drawn out moan of his name as you clench around him and the pent up knot in your stomach loosens.
Your twitching pulls Rick with you, too, and he grabs your throat as he cums inside you, gasping, "Mine. Only mine."
Whimpering, you nod, "Yours."
One last thrust and Rick collapses on top of you. 
His breathing is erratic and you wonder when the last time Rick fucked a woman was. It must have been longer for him, too, and you reach for his hair and gently stroke through it: "Did you like it?"
"Liked it? Fuck, it was better than I could ever dream of," he kisses you softly on the mouth.
He rolls off of you and pulls you to his chest, "Stay with me."
Grinning, you press your nose into his chest, "I intended to."
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Smutty May Masterlist
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