#I can’t believe it sometimes produces lines this good

[slythereen]

Hello, I am new to F1 and Charles is my favorite driver. Today I saw many people mentioning Charles' personal fashion CLACE. This project was blocked by Ferrari? But why? Do other drivers have a personal brand? Can they do what they want? I'm very curious about this. What does it mean now that Charles can wear his own clothes? I would be very grateful if you could reply to me<3

not me scrambling to tumblr to scream about the clace photos only to discover this. anon i am so sorry in advance if this goes off the rails but charles wear his own merch again IS kind of a big deal !!

1. why was clace blocked by ferrari?

i believe charles may have started working on clace and the concept of it while he was still with sauber. i’m not 100% on that timeline. regardless, he stopped developing it while at ferrari and once got asked about it. he said something to the effect that it just wasn’t a good time, but sebastian take-no-shit vettel revealed that actually, ferrari won’t let him (or any driver) have his own clothing line. (note to self: come back to link this interview video) so we know that is the true reason.

as to why, it’s because ferrari has an exclusive clothing partnership with puma. the drivers are allowed to design their “own” shirts for special races (like charles’ monza merch), but they are all still produced and sold by puma. the issue with clace, for ferrari/puma, is that it would not be produced by puma and therefore violates that exclusivity clause.

2. do other drivers have their own brands?

yes! not every team has a fully exclusive partnership. and given the individual contracts of drivers and unique brand circumstances (drivers have their own not-team sponsors as well as team sponsors, who sometimes sponsor them as a driver as well), it can vary. so it may be that ferrari as a team has an exclusive arrangement, but charles as a driver and independent contract may develop his own brand line on the side. that was not the case before (and still, theoretically) but just as an example.

off the top of my head: lando has quadrant, which is his own company/esports that sells merch. he also sells LN4 merch. quadrant is technically independent of him. i actually can’t remember if mclaren has a clothing sponsorship tbh, but he’s been able to have his own brand. similarly, max has vestappendotcom and team redline, both of which are independent organizations (and i believe redline has merch). daniel launched enchanté recently. sebastian didn’t start his good-causes t-shirts until after he retired but he has that brand. so yes, personal branding is also big for drivers are they start to develop their reputation as drivers apart from their teams.

as to whether or not they can do what they want… it really will vary based on the individual contract, but not really. i think lewis probably has the greatest freedom over his reputation and personal brand (he does a LOT outside of racing and is globally famous, “beyond” f1), but he likely still has certain clauses relating to his conduct and how it reflects on mercedes. plus, all of the drivers are bound by the fia’s rules (notably, the non-political stance that all drivers have to abide by).

one example along these lines are the driver’s personal cars. not all of them are really bound to have their own team’s constructor’s cars, i don’t think, but it seems like most drivers either do or they have a car from a related partner or sponsor. i know less about the personal cars tbh. charles has his ferrari pista which he mostly drivers, but he also has several other brands. max has several aston martins (which, while being a distinct team, as a Brand is one of red bull’s sponsors). i don’t know what the haas drivers drive, but i wouldn’t be surprised if they have ferraris (because haas uses ferrari engines).

3. so what does it mean that charles is wearing clace?

it means CHANGE. something is afoot that has changed his contractual obligations regarding puma. this can mean a LOT of things, especially because he just signed with a big talent management company (WME) and because he is wearing clace noticeably and publicly. a lot of his fans know it got shut down by ferrari, so he had to know that people who notice and realize this Means Something.

what does it mean? at the very least, in all of my theories, it means charles’ negotiating power has grown significantly. his personal brand and reputation has power. he is able to get a contract that entitles him to greater personal freedoms and branding outside of his team. that’s mega.

what contract, though? my main theories:

he has resigned with ferrari already with a very favorable contract (that immediately modified his current) that entitles him to greater liberties and likely has several clauses requiring more preferential treatment with car development etc

he has signed with rbr, who are less strict on personal brands (as an energy drink, they can achieve their marketing power based on putting a can in their hand regardless of what they are wearing. their brand is built more on vibes and emotion than on Stuff). this also likely means his contract kicks in sooner than, say, 2025… because otherwise, he’d likely still have to abide by his remaining year on the ferrari contract.

puma is ending their partnership with ferrari and/or ferrari’s sponsorships are shuffling around a bit, so it’s no longer a limitation on the drivers.

i’m sure there could be many other explanations. im sure wondering about what it all means is going to drive me insane.

also: welcome to f1 hell!!! ❤️💙

#charles leclerc #f1 #paddock politics #i cannot believe this #i saw the photo and was like HELLO!??? #frantically typing on my phone while I debate leaving work hahdsbc #brazil gp 2023 #scuderia ferrari #ferrari Civil war 2023 #ummm #rbr Charles #*oracles

[ciderjacks]

I watch some of Watcher's stuff, tell me whatever you want about Shane Madej!

HOUGHHHH. OHHRHFHTHABK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOY

i think a lot of people who are aware of Shane sort of just think of him as the skeptic guy on bfu/ghost files (not saying that’s u obv just a lot of ppl bc I guess I need this to be a pitch meeting) and I think that is a shame because HOLY SHIT HES SO TALENTED AND COOL AND WEIRD AND THE SHIT HE MAKES IS SO FUCKIKNG INSANELY GOOD

Ok so going back in time for a second to b*zzfeed. Who btw did not deserve this guy. Afaik he had two major like, creative projects on there. Ruining History and The Hot Daga. Both were very good. ruining history was a fun history show he did with Sara and Ryan and there are rotating guests every episode. Shane is very interested in history, very good at teaching history, and i think in an alternate universe hes a beloved high school history teacher. Ruining History is the father of puppet history. B*zzfeed canned it and i miss it every day. and then there’s the other father of Puppet History, Hot Daga. Hot Daga is insane. I love Hot Daga, its not for everyone, but I think its so good. The lore goes crazy, he produced and made original songs for it, he animated the whole final half season by himself which is fuckinf insane. He made a ballad for it and actually i need everyone reading this to Listen to “believe me maizey” and then directly after listen to the Meteor Ballad from Puppet History. OH LOOK A SEGWAY

Puppet history is so fuckinf good. Its So Good. And especially in later seasons since hes doing so much you really start to see his improvement as an artist and its just. Its incredible. Some of the somgs are genuinely fucking masterpieces, like some of my favs are The Flower Boat Song, Asmodeus, The Horse and God song, the Emu song, Big Pile Of Diamonds, Infinitiger, The Window Song, Gay Oars Duet, Hologram Professor Song, and the Meteor’s Ballad. And more. Uhh OH the Olympic Torch is really good too. His lyrics are so smart and fun and his vocals are so impressive and he has such good range, he duetted Himself for the Oar song and managed to make the two voices identifiable as separate characters without being over the top. The lyrics range from poetic anf beautiful to weird and funny often within the Same song! Its just so good and he starts so good and gradually over the years he’s done the show you can see him getting more comfortable and better at music which is crazy causw again HE STARTED OFF GOOD! HE WAS INSANE IN HOT DAGA AND HE IS SOMEHOW EVEN BETTER IN PUPPET HISTORY LIKE! and and and ok here’s where I get crazy and a little parasocial (lol not really i am misusing that word for the bit LOL)

Something about all his work is that you can kind of see how his art depicts the world. In Hot Daga you get the line “what else can you do in the face of such monumental loss, but breath a weary sigh as the world is a little quieter now.” And in Puppet history you get uh actually you get like 20 things from the meteor song but one of my favorite parts is (read blue as the professor, orange as the meteor, pink as both) “some shit’s just etched into the stars, calamities you cant outrun/and when sweet earth we finally meet/the sky will burn and boil the sea/as mountains rend/its you and me.” i think both these lyrics and these somgs demonstrate a maturity about the world that you dont really see in a lot of people, his general kindness towards anything and everything and his ability to change perspectives on things without being forceful. (On a personal note I listened to The Meteor song after someone I knew passed, and as dumb as it maybe sounds the idea that like,, death is not cruel, you can’t always run and sometimes the best thing you can do is be there with the people you love as the world ends.) and also I think that you really can tell that he views the people he’s telling you about as People and not just like, figures. Ykwim. He shows such genuine respect and care for everyone in these stories and I’ve already like briefly in these stories but like, you KNOW if a guy can make me cry for the Meteor that killed the dinosaurs then he’s something special. i also think the way he portrays death in his work is very comforting as a whole. and another thing speakinf of rhat is that he has so much respect for other cultures in a level I think that goes beyond just bare minimum not being a piece of shit. Like especially when he’s teaching history, an example that always sticks out to me is how much effort he put into making sure people remembered and thought about Hatshepsut by having a whole episode on her history then also making an EXTREMELY (probably intentionally so though i cant be sure bc I can’t reas minds) catchy song that Told you to think of Hatshepsut and explained Why uou should think of Hatshepsut and it’s been stuck in my head ever since I first heard it years ago. Also I’m consistently impressed by his good pronunciation of things, I remember in the Tunguska event episode of mystery files there were so many ppl from tbe area he was talking about shocked by how good his pronunciation was. And ive seen that so many times w him like, idk i just think thats very cool. He’s a genuinely really mature and respectful guy I think. Wise too. So much of his work has educated me, changed my worldview for the better, inspired me. Like He’s so talented ik i keep saying that but HE IS!

Like ok so. He can write both songs and stories beautifully. he’s wise as fuck and could probably be a philosopher. He can make puppets (and just tbc later season puppet history the puppets are not him, but in the early seasons afaik they were all him, so he is definitely skilled at that.), he can sing, he can voice act, his graphics and editing are off the charts, he’s educated and smart, hes funny. He’s so fuckinf cool.

also again getting parasocial here but I just really like how much of a zest for life the guy seems to have. And Honestly im impressed that he worked in retail, had actual trash thrown in his face by an angry customer (true story) and still came out it like “man the world sure is wonderful!”. What a guy. And He’s so fucking weird and interesting and I could seriously just listen to him rant about Literally anything Forever. Anything. It doesnt matter I think he could talk about anything in a way that would make me invested in it and i’d come out of it more educated than before with a fresh new perspective on life.

This is getting Essay-like so here are some other Random Shane Things I know to close me out I guess

-he loves community was in the community fandom and has a crush on troy barnes

-he wants to be a mouse

-he’s lived 7000 years

-

-was DB cooper

-makes a fine ass Krampus

-actually the coolest guy alive

sorry this is almost 100% incomprehensible thank you for letting my autism loose tho

#ask tag #shane madej #Um. Yeah. Hhahaha so when insaid I had autism about rhis guy uh Inwasnt kidding #we are watcher #puppet history #hot daga

[wonderfulworldofmichaelford]

Is It Really That Bad?

When it comes to infamous animated films, few are treated with quite as much revulsion as Mars Needs Moms. Based off of Bloom County creator Berkley Breathed’s storybook, brought to life by ImageMovers Digital (who created The Polar Express, that...beloved?… Christmas classic), distributed by Disney, and produced by Robert Zemeckis, the film really had the deck stacked in its favor… and yet, it quite infamously fumbled.

It released to become the 12th worst opening for any film in three thousand or more theaters, netting only $6 million on debut, and then proceeded to only gross $39 million dollars worldwide—and that’s including 3D theaters. With a budget of over $150 million, this cause a net loss of over $110 million dollars, which unsurprisingly led Disney to cut their losses and shut down ImageMovers Digital… which is what I would really rather say, but the depressing fact is that Disney nuked the studio before the movie even came out, as if they knew they had a massive bomb on their hand and wanted to punish the studio ahead of time.

As divisive as the studio’s animation was, it’s never really fun seeing an animation studio get scrapped like that. With its death, we lost some interesting film concepts, such as a remake of Yellow Submarine (which would have probably been even trippier with the motion capture animation), Roger Rabbit sequel, and a kaiju throwback film by Michael “Trick ‘r Treat” Dougherty called Calling All Robots. Say what you will about the studio’s output, but it’s genuinely a damn shame these ideas never came to fruition.

Over the years, just about every animation critic worth their salt has given this movie shit, from Mr Enter to the Nostalgia Critic, and Disney has largely seen fit to sweep this under the rug and pretend it never happened. But I can’t do that, can I? Y’all voted for me to watch this for the first time over a decade after it came out, and see if it’s really that bad. Did this movie manage to prove far better than its infamous reputation, or am I gonna have to put myself in a Martian memory extractor?

THE GOOD

Milo is actually pretty believable as a kid. I know some people find this character really annoying, or bratty, or obnoxious, but… that’s just how kids are. He’s a little bit of a shit and doesn’t understand the gravity of things he says sometimes, but he has a good heart and when it gets down to it he does all he can to save his mom. Like he’s just a child in need of harsh life lessons, typical of any fantastical family film. In a movie brimming with awful characters, he’s easily the least worst. Joan Cusack as the mom is pretty good, getting some funny line deliveries, and I’m sure she’s made someone’s list of “Hottest Animated MILFs.”

I think the core ideas behind the Martian society are really fascinating. Here we have a fascist, sexist dystopia. Every quarter of a century children are hatched, and females are passed off to nanny-robots to be raised while males are tossed down the garbage chutes to become feral, hairy wild men. The nanny-bots are programmed with the memories of abducted human women, memories which are forcibly extracted in a very fatal process. The women are then made to serve as the enforcers of the fascist regime, ruled over by an aging ruler who governs with an iron fist and doesn’t accept deviance from her desires, desires stemming from a deranged belief she is bettering society with her straw feminist viewpoints. On paper, it’s all very deep, dark, and intriguing.

The operating phrase, of course, being “on paper.”

THE BAD

Let me just get this out of the way: The animation is awkward, uncanny, and unpleasant. This is not a new or interesting observation, so I just wanted to get it over with as soon as possible, though it does feed into a few other issues, particularly the design of Ki.

Ki is just absolutely aggressively female in her design. Like, she’s pink, she has those curvy hips, she’s just really in your face about being a girl Martian. And yeah, the girls are the ones we see a lot of because of how the society is structured, but she’s so glaringly feminine it’s kind of obnoxious. Like she’s clearly given this overly polished design because she’s the beautiful, heroic lead character; other Martians do not look nearly as pleasant as she does. That’s not even getting into the obnoxious decision to have her speak in outdated hippie slang, a decision that’s about as pleasant as jamming splinters under your fingernails.

She’s not even the most annoying character, though. That would be Gribble, played by Dan Fogler, the fat dude from Fantastic Beasts. You’d think that because he was the best part of those flaccid spinoffs he’d be the best part of this movie, but you’d be absolutely wrong. He’s every annoying comic relief trope smashed into one incredibly obnoxious character, and considering almost no one else in this movie is likable at all he really sticks out as being unpleasantly annoying. It doesn’t help that the single moment they try and give him depth—when he recounts to Milo the harrowing experience of watching his mother die as her memories were extracted, so close to saving her and yet so far—is immediately followed by Ki showing up and Fortnite dancing and spitting out some more of her obnoxious slang.

And that right there really highlights what’s wrong with this movie: It is tonally inconsistent to an absurd degree. With a title like “Mars Needs Moms” and the general atmosphere of the opening as well as the marketing really lead you to believe this will be a simple, silly family comedy where a kid learns to appreciate his parents a la Jimmy Neutron. But then we get into the Martian dystopia, the explicit mass murder of moms, the grim visuals, the constant peril, and it’s pretty obvious the film wants to be serious and say something as well… all while keeping the funny wisecracking fat guy mentor, the Fortnite dancing monkey Martian men, and the pink and perky alien hippie graffiti artist who loves to talk like she just stepped out of Woodstock. It’s not impossible to handle two wildly different tones in a film, but to say this movie bungles it is an understatement; it ultimately causes the film to lack any sort of identity and just dissolves into an ugly mess of interesting ideas and confused writing that is impossible to take seriously.

IS IT REALLY THAT BAD?

The short answer? Yes, this movie is really, truly awful. But a short answer is pretty unsatisfying, isn’t it?

I was honestly, genuinely hoping going into this that the critics were wrong and maybe there was something to like here… and yeah, there were a couple of things I thought were done pretty decently, but overall the movie is just an incredibly sloppy and tonally inconsistent mess that never really settles into what it wants to be. It actually had me thinking about another movie while watching it, and that movie is The Guyver. While I’m saving a full review of that for when I bring back Michael After Midnight, the film had the same sort of wild tonal whiplash that Mars Needs Moms does, a sort of dissonance in the story where it can’t decide if it wants to be dark and edgy or lighthearted and goofy. But while I don’t think either film is particularly good, I think the fact I find The Guyver to be infinitely more valuable as a film highlights the strength of live action cinema over animation. Jarring tonal inconsistency is just so much easier to swallow when you don’t have to look at some of the ugliest animation you’ve ever seen, y’know?

Mars Needs Moms is honestly quite a bit worse than that score would suggest. This is definitely one of the worst animated movies ever made, unlike what happened with The Emoji Movie, I don’t think the overwhelming revulsion towards the film is over-exaggerated by much. Like, yes, this isn’t the worst movie in human history, nor even the worst animated movie, but the fact that it’s not only bad but bad enough to ruin an entire studio makes it kind of legendary in terms of badness. At least Sony Animation was able to put out the two best Spider-Man movies ever made after The Emoji Movie flopped; ImageMover Digital got no such second chance, and not only went under but dragged the entire motion capture animation style down with it. I think it tarnishing an entire style alongside everything else (and thus probably being partially responsible for the lack of a Tintin sequel) really seals the deal on this being a piece of shit.

I’d honestly drop this film into the low 2s at best. It’s a bottom 100 contender for sure, and it’s far worse than some of the movies on there. Gigli? This movie is way worse than that. Cats? That movie is way campier and has far funnier use of uncanny valley animation. The Room and Trolls 2? Those are both way too funny to be worse than Mars Needs Moms. Fucking Batman & Robin? That’s an actual solid movie, how is it rated lower than this? Hell, I’d even say The Emoji Movie is better, because at least it doesn’t hurt to look at.

The thing is, while I think it’s objectively awful, I can’t say I can personally muster up too much hate for it. It’s so confused tonally that it’s almost fascinating to watch. If you’re a bad movie connoisseur like I am or just generally fascinated by bombs of this magnitude, it’s worth a watch. But outside of that, this movie is just too messy to really find even a cult audience. So if you don’t fall into that weird niche of people who watch bad movies for some reason, don’t bother. You’re not really missing anything valuable.

#is it really that bad? #IIRTB #review #movie review #Mars Needs Moms #Disney #ImageMovers Digital #animation #animated movie

[dinosquad-central]

Okay, longer post about a headcanon that is completely integral to my enjoyment of Dino Squad. (Largely copy/pasted from my rant on the Discord server)

I think Caruso might actually be very smart. Genuinely, classically, academically smart.

I know that sounds like a crackpot theory, but hear me out!

He's in the same science class as Rodger (the guy who's explicitly stated to be the smartest kid in school), as well as Fiona (who's also clearly very intelligent), Buzz (maybe not top marks, but since it appears to be a biology class, and Buzz is especially interested in animals it makes sense he'd be in a more advanced bio-class). Max may not be a genius, but most schools require members of the school sports teams to maintain a certain GPA, and he’s on the football team, so he can't be a complete idiot either.

And Caruso is in the same class as them and therefore it's implied that he's at the same level as them in that subject! Because of this, and the fact that the classroom is a lecture hall and not a regular classroom, I also headcanon that it's an AP bio class, or at least honors.

Plus! When Caruso told his parents he was dinosaur, their one insistence was that he not neglect his studies meaning A) his family cares about his education and B) he probably gets at least relatively good grades already.

AND! It's shown in the show that Caruso regularly and *easily* manipulates his friends into doing his homework for him (episode: “who let the dog out”). He also manipulated others during the show, including a TV producer or show host, I can’t remember which (episode: “Zoom in on Zoom” I think). You can't be that deliberately manipulative and a complete idiot like Caruso appears to be.

ALSO Caruso has a line of beauty products which he both invented, and markets/sells himself (episode: “Scents and Scents Ability”), meaning he must also have a small company/business that he personally runs, and the quality of his products are good enough to have a whole spa treatment devoted exclusively to them, which is named after him/his product, meaning the products themselves must be well known and trusted enough to attract customers. This demonstrates that Caruso has some level of skill with chemistry and botany (iirc he made herbal moisturizers but it's been a while, so that detail may be wrong). In addition to that he must have a good sense for business, finance, and marketing.

But wait! There's more! When they were trapped in a cage with seemingly no way out, it was Caruso who came up with the plan to use misdirection and social engineering to trick Veloci into not only letting them go, but also donating a sizeable amount to a local charity as hush money (episode: who let the dog out”). It wasn’t genius Rodger, or leader Max, or competent female character Fiona, it was Caruso, “the dumb one”. This indicates that he can also think on his feet and come up with quick solutions to difficult problems.

Furthermore! A lot of highly intelligent people learn to act like they're stupid because when people know how smart you are, they have high expectations of you, and that's stressful to the point of traumatizing sometimes. There's also an interesting type of stigma around intelligence where people tend to think you're pompous or unapproachable when you're highly intelligent and become intimidated or resentful, which, since Caruso highly values his popularity, would be extremely distasteful to him. Given his fixation with fame and popularity, I don't think it's a stretch at all to think he'd dumb himself down, even around his friends, to avoid that stigma.

So yeah, there you have it. That’s all the reasons (that’s I can think of at the moment, anyway) why I believe Caruso is a big fat liar pretending to be an idiot so he doesn’t have to be responsible for anything. I hope I’ve managed to convince you all because I am 100% committed to this theory lol.

#feel free to use this headcanon in any of your creations I encourage it #please note however that I may have cited some episodes incorrectly by mistake #I know all of these things happened but I’m bad at connecting episode titles to events #i did my best #dinosquad #dino squad #erwin caruso #dinosquad headcanons #dino mod

[bigfreakinfrog]

Ok so I’ve been thinking about this for a while about Elias’s imprisonment.... So generally when people are accused of a crime they get a trial. and it must be proved beyond a reasonable doubt that the accused is guilty. Now: the only evidence that they had was the tape where Elias admitted to the murder of Gertrude and Lietner and possibly the tape where he actually killed Lietner? Unsure on that one. Yes both of those tapes could be prettyyyy damning evidence but you can’t really find someone guilty on just that. Elias could deny it was him on the tape or it was altered and I have a hard time believing he could actually be charged on both their murders based on tape recordings. Obviously AI voice wasn’t like it is today back in good ol’ 2017 but it probably wasn’t far off and I’m sure the defense could claim that the tapes were digitally altered. (You can make an audio file and record it onto a tape recorder pretty easily). So here are my theories:

1. Elias threw the trial and just admitted guilt. He wanted to go to prison anyway to get out of having to be around Jon and to instill Peter at the Institute. However, I think this is the least likely scenario since it’d be more difficult to get out of should anything go wrong (aka if Jon actually decided to die and he had to go to a backup plan). He probably also wouldn’t want to ruin his reputation by being found guilty. Sure being accused of murder isn’t a great look either but... lol

2. The trial keeps getting delayed due to bureaucracy/Elias’s meddling and while he’s awaiting trial they decided he was possibly too dangerous to be free. I did look it up and you can be imprisoned before trial in the UK if its determined to be necessary.

It’s possible that he organized something through blackmail to allow his court date to keep getting postponed. Also he could simply have organized with the police to simply hide out in prison without any charges (this is kinda like... a fourth theory but it wasn’t too different from the second so i didn’t make a whole new bullet point). The whole thing just for show. He literally didn’t need to be in handcuffs he’s just being dramatic

3. There *was* more evidence.

“All the evidence” does imply more than just the tapes. Perhaps they had fingerprints they could match on the pipe. Again with the tapes, Elias could argue they were spoofed and refuse to sign any confession. He also already is able of producing counter evidence through manipulating the cameras in the Institute. Fingerprints would be harder to dismiss but then... Jon’s fingerprints would also be on the pipe.

-

Anyway in my person theory number 2 is the most likely scenario. In MAG 122 we get this line from Basira:

Notably she doesn’t say he was convicted or charged. So if theory 2 is correct he really could just leave anytime he decides/speed through his trial and be found innocent should anything go awry. I find it interesting to speculate on how many backup plans Elias had going at once. Obviously all the marks were meticulously planned out, but even the best laid plans fail sometimes. It doesn’t make sense for him to allow himself to be proven guilty when Jon could kick the bucket and then he’d be stuck in prison delaying his ritual.

... Ultimately none of this really matters to the plot of the show I just thought it was interesting.

#elias bouchard #the magnus archives #tma #having a trial wouldve been pretty cool in s4 #not that it was needed i just thought abt like #elias fucking around with them and producing video evidence of him not being there at the time of the murder #and then turning it around on martin/melanie/daisy whoever accusing them of having conspiracy against him #he wouldve been very smug #but its probably one of those details writers gloss over cause its not so important #not a criticism at all i certainly do it too lol #croaks

[sullustangin]

Fluffy February Day 5: Planet

SWTOR

Rating: T

Time: Roughly, now in canon

Pairing: Theron Shan/Eva Corolastor; whole crew makes an appearance

~~

They awoke to the sound of her name being called.  “Captain!”  “Eva!”  “Boss!”  The cries came through the ship intercom system as they finally stirred.

Initially, Eva squirmed to try to tuck herself closer to him. 

Duty called.  “We’ve got to get up at some point, Eva,” Theron yawned.

Eva rolled slightly to prop herself up on his chest. “We finally get away from Odessen together, for the first time in six months.  Now you’re telling me I have to leave our bed without being prompted by shrieking because my crew is probably running around holding the wrong end of a servodriver.”

Theron stretched his arms out to the side.  “That, or Argo is having a fit wondering where we are.” 

“Theron, you’ve heard that baby cry.  We’d hear him from up here.”

He guffawed.  The baby was safely stowed with Bowdaar, who adored Little Girl’s even littler boy.  Eva’s maternity leave had abruptly ended when her boring excursion to Port Nowhere with Rass Ordo had launched her – and the Alliance – into a rescue of Ord Mantel.

Corso Riggs, of course, helped lead the charge.  Now everyone was due for some R&R, but Eva had again followed Theron’s example of …not quite stopping work. 

Eva dropped her head back down onto Theron’s chest. “You want to do this again sometime?”

“Of course.”

The ship’s intercom went off again, and another chorus of hails demanded Eva’s attention.  “They aren’t going to get quieter,” Theron told her as he kicked at the covers.

With a huff, Eva got to her feet and pulled on one of her robes, adding some layer of protection to the green and gold pajamas.  Then she smashed a finger into the intercom.   “Is something on fire?”

“No,” replied Corso.

“Bleeding to death?”

“No.”

“Why are you waking me up?” 

“We made it to Distilion.”

“I can’t believe you’re seriously naming it that.”  Risha’s eyeroll was nearly audible.

Theron sighed too.  He really shouldn’t have inspired her with the idea it was her mission to save all the wineries, distilleries, and other liquor-producing planets in the galaxy. 

Now she’d karking bought a planet, with the intended purpose of making a booze planet.  All the planetary beverages that had been taxed to death by the Eternal Empire?  Eva’s plan was to bring them all back, with the traditional brewers, in a haven dedicated to alcohol.  Distilion. 

The Voidhound’s long-lost fortune… was not that lost. 

Suddenly spry, Eva was a whirlwind as she assembled her clothes and popped into the fresher.  She did a record-time run of her routine and was out the door.

By the time Theron made it out to the lounge, where C2 passed him a cup of caf.  “Lana Beniko has just received the manifesto and bill of sale for the planet,” he dryly informed him.

Oh boy.

“You can’t just buy a planet and add it to the Alliance without any groundwork!”  Aghast, Lana nearly tossed her datapad as she wildly gestured in the Odessen conference room. 

Eva flashed a near-manic smile at her as Guss passed her a datapad.  “New Imperial land ordinance said I could so I did!”  Theron wasn’t sure if she was happier about the purchase or rattling Lana. 

“We have no established government there – it’s just being handed off to us ‘as is’ and we have no inkling as to what ‘as is’ means!” 

Eva’s wrist comm let out a squawk.  “Money fixes everything, Lana, as far as ex-Pub or Imp worlds go.  Go look at Rishi.  And good timing, Lana.  The seller is on the line.”  Eva added another holographic image to the Thief’s holo comm unit.  

A rough and tumble-looking Rodian appeared on the screen.  “Good day, Captain.  So happy you’ve come through for us financially.”    

“And I’d like you to come through for us regarding the infrastructure, or else some funds will remain in escrow,” Eva replied evenly, taking the cup of caf that C2 offered her. 

The Rodian’s snoot shriveled up for a moment.  “Fine.  Didn’t expect you to take the property entirely without a problem.  We have our share of separatist problems –”

“What sort of seps?” Corso asked, archly.

“Given this was an Imperial planet, probably those who wish to go to Republic.  Or at least the Alliance,” Akaavi said, leaning in the doorway.

“Minor sewage –”

“80% of the planet does not have indoor plumbing,” Eva read off the datapad.

“Occasional volcanic –”

“There’s a massive line of tectonic activity at the equator.”  Eva squinted at the numbers.  “Less volatile than the deep mining in Makeb, so I think we can work with that.”

“Don’t forget the parts of the lowlands that need a respirator due to the toxic waste burial sites from two wars ago.” Guss jabbed at the datapad. 

Eva pointedly looked up at her Rodian counterpart.  “Why would you sell this treasure trove?”

The Rodian sputtered, and then –

Theron nearly burst out laughing as he saw the internal crisis play out on the Rodian’s face.  He thought he was off-loading a cesspit on Eva, backed up by the data, but now he was wondering if he’d let it all go for too little – and now he’d always wonder, since the initial documents had been inked – with real ink, knowing her. 

Some things were worth more than the credits. 

“I… I work hard to make a better life for my Wookiee.” He mumbled as he tried collect himslf.

Guss perked up.  “That your honey name for tall, shiny, and intimidating over there?”  He pointed at the bounty hunter next to him (not a Mandalorian, but he certainly had the disposition down pat). 

“No, my Wookiee.  Kawrog,” the Rodian replied.  He visibly untensed and the face was unscrunched.  “More accurate to say I’m his fourth pet cat or something.  He’s 152 now.”

Eva thumbed toward the general direction of the crew quarters.  “Bowie’s celebrating 215 later this year.  Whenever the Naboo Food Festival is.”

“Oh, he enjoys that too?  Kawrog is a snob now that he’s been –”

Somehow, Wookiees and smugglers always worked things out. 

~~

@fluffyfebruary

#fluffy february #swtor fan fiction #theron shan #theron shan x smuggler #oc: eva corolastor #lana beniko #guss tuno #risha drayen #corso riggs #akaavi spar #bowdaar #c2-n2 #yes i am salty we didn't get time with corso when we saved his damn planet #oc: argento shan

[rosecoloreddesire]

Pretty When I Cry

Austin Butler x singer!Reader 

Summary: You are a singer who landed an interview alongside actor Austin Butler on Jimmy Fallon. You show of your new song and Austin lets out a statement that leaves you shocked kinda into him. 

Warnings: Just teasin’ and fluff! 

Note: Thanks y’all for so much love on my writing! I can’t believe I get to write all this and y’all enjoy it thank you! I’m uploading this while I write a rough draft of chapter 4 of MDID! Enjoy!

Masterlist

———————

“You are kidding me, Kashyra! You got me an interview with him?! I can’t do this!” You turned to your publicist who was still grinning ear to ear. She still had her hands out shaking them enthusiastically. The most ridiculous jazz hands as she holds your hair extensions.

“What? I thought you’d be excited! Surprise,” you wanted to melt into the makeup chair you were in,” I knew you wouldn’t do the interview if you knew about the Austin Butler part.” She rubbed your shoulders as she continued to look at you through the mirror. She helped the stylists brush your h/c strands of hair.

“Shy, you know how much this song means to me. If I have to explain in front of Jimmy Fallon AND the guy I wrote it about? I’m gonna die!” You slouch into the chair and let out a deep sigh. You wrote this song in a moment of weakness. Some of your film producing friends had somehow gotten you invited to Cannes and that’s where you saw him for the first time. Honestly you didn’t know if you should’ve been looking at him or how gorgeous Priscilla Presley looked. Though when you got there all you could remember was:

“Oh my god I’m sorry. I-I wasn’t watching where I was walking!” You tried not to ruin your makeup that your team spent hours on when you looked up.

“It’s alright, darlin’. Are you okay? Was my movie that bad?” You could’ve died right then and there. You shook your head wildly.

“Oh my god no! I just got a message from a friend of mine. My boyfriend…hmm he thought a Jenner was a better pick than me. ” You panicked and your heart raced as you could see the flashing lights aimed at the both of you. His hand moved  a piece of hair out of your face softly, which blocked your face from the line of photographers coming towards both of you.

“Don’t be. Come on I’ll help you clean up. I’ll tell the press you were moved by the movie,okay? Though you are so pretty when you cry.” Your heart skipped a beat and you paused. Who was this guy and why was he so….so mesmerizing?

“Thank you so much. You don’t have to do this for me, Austin.”

“Hey, I want to. Where’s that beautiful smile I saw earlier during that standing ovation? That’s my girl.”

You couldn’t get that out of your head for weeks after Cannes ended and now you were seeing advertisements and commercials all about him. And god if your crush on Elvis was anything….Austin Butler playing Elvis? Yeah, it didn’t help your case. So soon enough you found yourself writing a song, “Pretty When You Cry” which by god, you shouldn’t have let your fans name but sometimes they had good ideas...

“So you’ll be on in a couple minutes after he starts talking about ELVIS with Pretty When You Cry,” you placed your head in your palms and groaned,” I ain’t the one who named it, y/n! Then you’ll perform it and he’ll fall in love with you!” You rolled your eyes. You felt your hands getting clammy as you fixed your dress, being lead by the stage crew. Time to cringe and find it all over the internet tomorrow.

“Now that we’ve found out all about Elvis the movie, please welcome our other musical guest, y/n l/n! You look amazing!“ Jimmy comes around his desk to give you a big hug and you laugh. You almost swoon as Austin does the same. His cologne really as pertinent as the night you met.

“It’s so nice to be here and with the king of rock and roll I might add,” the crowd cheers as you point at Austin who puts a hand on his chest,” I saw the movie at Cannes and wow you did an amazing job bringing Elvis to the big screen!” He laughs as Jimmy agrees.

“Thank you for showin’ up! The 12 minute standing ovation really got me thinkin’ I did a good job with him.” He pointed to the ceiling and you smiled. He was so humble it was endearing.

“Anyone would’ve thought bein’ able to move your hips like that for almost three hours is impressive. And attractive I might add.” The sudden boost of confidence did nothing for your screaming brain however. What were you saying? His skin becomes flushed pink as he clears his throat.

“Wow you really think so? Sometimes I was shakin’ so bad I thought it’d look somethin’ awful!” He chuckled and Jimmy gasped.

“No way! Those outfits really helped pull all those moves together too! You looked great!” He praised Austin who flushed once again and rubbed his bottom lip shakily.

“Well enough about me darlin’. What about that amazing new song she released guys?” His voice dipping into a little bit of Elvis’ southern twang. He placed a hand on your shoulder as he gazed at you. You couldn’t describe the look in his cobalt eyes. The crowd erupted in cheers once again and you felt your cheeks heat up in embarrassment. You begin to walk up to the side of the stage where your band sits.

“If you guys haven’t heard it! Here’s y/n’s new single “Pretty When You Cry”!!!” Jimmy applauds. The lights turn dim as you start. You feel nervous as the lights turn to reddish hue. You grab the mic and run your hand along the stand. Your heart beating a mile a minute while Austin leans forward and doesn’t let his eyes leave yours.

“All the pretty stars shine for you, my love. Am I that girl that you dream of?”

You close your eyes trying to imagine how it felt when Austin left you that night. The raw magnetism he had. The way that his charisma oozed pure confidence and spelled Elvis. The way his hand felt against your skin. That made you forget about your ex boyfriend. You could still feel the soft touch of his finger tips.

“All those special times you said that I’m your girl. You make me feel like your whole world.”

When he called you ‘his girl’ it was as if time stopped. You just found your ex publicly cheating on you and it was like it didn’t even matter. As Austin stared at you in a sea of cameras like you were everything that mattered. You opened your eyes and looked to the side as Austin leaned back on the couch. His whole aura was confidence as he bit his lip. You take the mic off the stand and walk a little closer to the camera. A single tear falling from your eye as you smirk.

“All those special times I spent with you, my love. They don’t mean shit next to all your drugs.”

Your ex ruined you. He ruined your image and ruined your self confidence all in one headline. His drugs and alcohol were always a problem because they came first. You were pissed of course but all that was mute to him. That model could deal with it all now.

“Because I’m pretty when I cry, pretty when I cry.”

Why? Because now you know you’re pretty when you cry. The song ends as you take the microphone off the stand singing the last few lines and swaying along. You send a wink to the camera at the last part. Not missing how Jimmy and Austin start fanning each other. You stride back to the couch and now simply as you sit. Austin places a hand on your back and you tense.

“So, y/n. You know everyone’s been dying to know since you released your single, what’s it about to you?” Jimmy looked like he was waiting on baited breath as you shakily chuckled. Austin places his arm behind you on the edge of the couch.

“Well my friends had invited me to this really prestigious event, right? And at that event I received the worst news of my life and this guy came to my side to comfort me,” you couldn’t slow yourself down until you realized the smiling actor beside you,” and I couldn’t stop thinking about it and this was the only way to get him out of my head.”

“Wow! Talk about love at first sight! Did you ever talk to him about the song? Or does he even know that it’s about him?” Jimmy gasped and rested his chin on his hand looking at you in awe. You gulped and looked at Austin.

“I think he knows now,” the crowd gasps and ooo’s as you realize you just set yourself up,” Oh my god, it’s not Austin!” Jimmy laughs as Austin puts his hand against his forehead.

“I’m wounded, y/n. I wouldn’t mind.” He winks at you as Jimmy sets up the commercial break. You get up as fast as you can to help your band take down. How the hell did you just ruin your life in ONE interview?!

“Hey, you handled that quite well. It just looked like playful banter! The song was amazing!“ Shy stops you as she helps you step onto the stage. You ask her to help with the zipper on your dress getting stuck on the mic pack.

“I hope it did. I hope I don’t mess up the words either! God, he’s gonna think I’m a love sick loser. The song isn’t even that good. Shy?” You feel large calloused hands on your back as your zipper lifts. You feel soft lips on the shell of your ear.

“I might be the love sick loser, darlin’.” You whip around and Austin’s warm hands find solace on your lower back.

“A-Austin I’m so so-“ he cuts you off with a soft kiss.

“I think you are so pretty even when you aren’t cryin’ , lil’ mama.”You feel yourself melt into his arms and he laughs. Walking over to Jimmy to continue his segment about becoming Elvis. And god those Elvis dance moves could make you cry. You try to focus on helping your band mates but:

“Well he did say I’m pretty when I cry…” You make your way back over and sit down watching him move. Lord, have mercy.

taglist: (let me know if you’d like to be tagged in future stories!)

@ficsrecsforhrnybitches

#austin butler #austinbutlerimagine #austin butler x reader #elvis film #rosecoloreddesire #elvis 2022 #austin butler elvis #elvis presley #austin butler drabble #austin butler fic

[historia-vitae-magistras]

How supportive is Jack when Zee is dealing with things he doesn't? I imagine it isn't much. Men suck lol and 19th century men suck even more

He's better than he could be, not as good as he should be. There are parts of Zee's existence he will never fully understand. With women in general, I don’t think he’s exceptional in either direction. Has a bit of that casual lad’s lad, blokey bloke that doesn’t exactly encourage sensitive, serious nuanced conversations about gender and privilege. He thinks highly enough of Zee and doesn’t have much sexual attraction to women, so the things men say will startle him sometimes. Microaggressions he won't pick up on, but her reaction he will on instinct. He does have a good sense of when she’s sad, hungry or upset and tbh, a lad with one of his largest northern cities named after Charles Darwin probably doesn’t believe in much in the way of a higher power, but his baby sister can put the fear of god in him regardless.

And if I were writing the human son of an English admiral, Jack absolutely could have been a massive asshole. Even as he stands, he can be a massive asshole. He’s dense, he’s brash, and he can get frustrated with Zee being the more academically inclined and well-behaved one of them. Zee rails against her gender sometimes. When she’s supposed to be at home, he often mentally frames it so that she gets to be at home. That what is an obligation for women is a privilege in his head sometimes. When WW1 and WW2 both started, those were the fiercest fights they had ever had in their entire lives. She saw it as being forced to work as a nurse; he saw it as an opportunity to stay out of harm's way. But when she stood her ground and was just as capable of firing a rifle as he was, it was as close to 1:1 as it could be.

He can resent how she is often better at things he’s supposed to excel at. Zee is the one with the head for engineering; he’s the one who played the piano Arthur bought her. He’s said some shit over the years. He values equality, and women’s suffrage was only a year or two after New Zealand, but he’s still a dipshit sometimes. He might not understand some of the finer points of being a woman, but he understands her more than he does anyone else.

At the end of the day, the bottom line that defines so much of what he is and what kind of man he’s become is that he was born a penal colony. His earliest memories are not happy ones. Loving ones, perhaps. He can remember laughing and Brighid smiling as she worked a loom, and he tumbled around in the dusty yard of a gaol after whatever animals convicts were allowed to keep to feed themselves. He can remember being huddled by her side as she wept for home across three oceans. He can remember the casual blows from British soldiers and the foul things men said to Brighid when there was only a door and a lock to keep them at bay. He remembers the helplessness of childhood and the gaping hole left in him when Arthur staked his claim. He doesn't have mommy issues; he knows damn well Brighid loved him as best she could, and his relationship with Arthur is best left to another post, but from the day Zee came into his world, there was nothing and no one more important.

Irish politicians steered much of Australia’s path to dominion and then independence. This included the secret or private ballot that's still known as an Australian ballot and the famous ‘one man one vote’ policy. Ireland is so embedded into Australian history that as of 2020, there were scholars still arguing Australia needed to be less Irish when writing its histories. It was Irish politicians who also contributed heavily towards the philosophies that produced the clause that, in the documents establishing Australia as a nation, always left the door open for New Zealand. That doesn't negate the many issues their countries have and it doesn't change a lot of things. He can’t change how he was born, the role his existence plays, or the hand his father had in his creation, nor will he batter at the British Empire after a certain limit. But the one thing he can control, the one thing he will never emulate from his father? How he treats his sister. He’s not flawless, and in many ways, he could do much better, and I think he is becoming more aware, especially in this century. But he has always cared so much. And he will look out for her until he doesn’t have eyes, and he’ll lean towards the Tasman until the sun ceases to rise.

#the ask box || probis pateo #jack || a land of summer skies #zee || ahakoa he iti he pounamu #Jack and Zee || pieces of me across the Tasman sea

[ochrefic]

Tell us about the sin-eater AU!

anon you complete me

this barely even discusses the actual story because there’s so much setup. the sin eater au has very complicated lore for something which is mostly about everyone suffering a lot. i apologize in advance

this is a modern world with magic, but it’s not very powerful. the average person mostly interacts with it in the form of purchased physical objects. the average person is able to sense magic— for instance, walking up to an enchanted object, one can likely sense the power, the temperament, and the purpose of the enchantment. they can also tell some things about other people’s internal magic.

everyone has internal magic. if you don’t it is because you are dead. your internal magic is affected by a lot of things. sometimes your physical health but mostly mental nonsense*. it can get corrupted due to the aforementioned mental nonsense, which is a tiny bit unfun.

(*this is debated** in-universe, we will come back to that in a later post)

(**"debated", we’ll come back to that in a later post)

the vast majority of people cannot do anything with their internal magic. they have no way to access it in a conscious manner. a few people are able to consciously access their magic— “magic users”.. this is sort of but not totally genetic, but in any case you cannot become a magic user on purpose. you have it or you don’t.

having access to your internal magic is mostly not a good thing. there are very few Actual Magicians because trying to do anything notable with it means studying it as a discipline, which is like learning engineering and law at the same time while going to trade school on the weekends. if you don’t want to go to superhell college, you can practice a reasonable amount and then you can do silly little party tricks. which is cool and fun!

however.

a person’s body can only contain so much magic. if you are normal and don’t have any way to consciously access yours, your body handles it for you— you’ll gradually produce more if you lose it, you won’t end up with more magic than you’re supposed to have, everything will be chill and fine.

if you are a magic user, you are theoretically capable of decreasing your internal magic via performing spells, so your body decides not to be helpful. if you have somehow acquired too much magic, you gotta get rid of it on your own.

magic users can mess with the magic of non-users. you can give magic to someone or take it away from them.

again, normal people can’t use their own magic but can perceive the magic inside of objects or other organisms. some people can use magic, which may not be good for them. here’s a third category for you to remember: a small number of people are completely unable to perceive magic at all— they are “magicblind”. this is mostly not a problem.

*****

after Many Words, we have arrived at the prologue.

john’s family belongs to a religious community which is toeing the line between “slightly weird people with unethical beliefs” and “cult”. they are christian but most of their theological beliefs aren’t super relevant

things they believe which are relevant and (very) controversial:

magic is ‘witchcraft’, which means it is evil and bad.

having corrupted magic is a sign of having sinned, and to cleanse yourself of that sin you must remove the corrupted magic.

being a magic user means that you have been chosen to act as the eater of sin for your community; this is, supposedly an honor. it is your duty to listen to the wrongdoings of your community members, to take their corrupted magic from them, and to keep it inside yourself literally forever. you are not allowed to say no.

john was eleven when he finally got caught shaking sparks from the ends of his fingers. he was twelve when he started taking sins. he was twelve, and the parents of his schoolmates were telling him about how they drink too much and they yell at their wife and they beat their children and they wish their spouse was dead, and he would take their hands and look them in the eyes and scoop out the rotten twisted bits of their magic and bury them inside himself as deeply as he could.

after a while it started to show no matter how much he tried to hide it. corrupted magic doesn’t smell, exactly, but it produces a similar sense of repulsion. his schoolmates began to look at him with disgust. their parents began to fear him. he moves his bedroom to the top floor of the house because his aura keeps his siblings from falling asleep. his mother doesn't touch him anymore.

it began to make him sick, eventually. it is a sickness that cannot be chased away, and one for which he gets no sympathy. it is a duty and it is an honor and he does as he is told. he is resigned to it. but it is a very lonely and painful path to walk. he cannot imagine anything else, but there is very little light left in his days. other than duty there is very little left to live for.

until the new foster kid with flyaway hair and ripped denim trousers sits next to him without seeming even to notice what he is.

#long post #asks #amrev #hamilton #lams #stay tuned for more posting at. some point. probably. #ask questions if any of this doesn't make sense #(probably none of it makes sense)

[philhoffman]

This week’s Monday Philm (delayed to Tuesday) is God’s Pocket (2014), dir. John Slattery. Watching a movie with a main character named Mickey that takes place partly in Florida the day I get back from a trip to Disney in Orlando... fate.

It’s been a while since I’ve revisited God’s Pocket but I decided to watch with John Slattery’s commentary tonight. It wasn’t that enlightening, mostly just technical talk about locations and casting smaller parts and deciding which takes to use, but I get that recording it was probably kind of awkward and sad in the aftermath’s of PSH’s death. Still, he spoke very highly of working with Phil as an actor and a fellow producer:

Another of Phil’s gifts was [working] technically. He could do everything he could do emotionally while knowing exactly where the camera was all the time. And then after the fact, he would know which take was the most effective take... He remembered every single take, which is surprising given how deeply into it he was while shooting it. He remembered everything.

Slattery also mentioned that God’s Pocket, which premiered at Sundance on January 17, 2014, was one of the first of Phil’s films that he’d watched with an audience in almost a decade—which Phil talked about at the festival as well.

I like this movie but I understand why some people don’t but I also think many of the critics are a bit too harsh. Slattery’s adapted screenplay is rough and feels all over the place at times, even after hearing him explain his writing and directing decisions. But for a quiet little independent film, I think it delivers. One of the best parts of rewatching PSH’s filmography is the opportunity to see who else stands out on repeat viewings—I was pretty laser-focused on Phil the first time (and sometimes a few times after that), but now I can appreciate a lot of the other performances in his films. John Turturro and Christina Hendricks are both so good here—especially what she communicates with so few lines.

You can feel the weight and worry in Phil’s performance as Mickey Scarpato. He’s never felt at home in this community and Leon’s death forces him to look around and confront it, how little control or happiness he has in his life, and decide whether or not to walk away. As a dark comedy, it almost reminds me of The Savages in that the humor is more based on the funny, strange things people really say and do rather than contrived laugh-out-loud jokes (aside from dragging a body around in a meat truck, I guess). Mickey does what must be done, but at times he can’t hide his exasperation—he just cannot believe this is his life. 

There’s one scene toward the end of the film, a simple shot of Phil’s face, that made me smile so much just because of how familiar it was—the cut of his brow, that sharp look in his eye, how his lip curled around his toothbrush. I love that face and the mind behind it and how comfortingly familiar he is to me now. Next week’s movie, A Most Wanted Man, will complete my second watch of Phil’s entire filmography, this time in chronological order. Not sure what I’ll do next but I am just. so glad and grateful to have Phil in my life in all the ways I do—as an artistic inspiration and mentor and comforting presence and more. And he is so so so cute <3

#also slattery said they had to use a double for the truck bc Phil didn't know how to drive stick shift... relatable king #monday philm #god's pocket #philip seymour hoffman #psh #* #they shot for about a month and it was 100 degrees for most of those days. you can tell. #mickey sleeping and waking up dazed and sweaty in a white tank top u r everything 2 me...

[dragonmuse]

It might be weird timeline wise, but could we see Stede and/or Eddy teaching Alma how to do makeup?

(got this ask long enough ago that the timeline has changed, so there are plenty of place to put it now! This starts when Alma is 14, just before I'll Share Your Load) 

“Smooth as you can.” Stede painted eyeliner over the back of his hand to show her. “You can always take it off if you make a mistake, but I always do mine after shadow and it can make a mess if you have to wipe too much off.” 

“Okay.” Alma watched then took up her own felt tip. She moved it slowly over the lid. 

“Good,” he praised. “Going a little faster will help, you won’t get so many hesitation marks, but it looks nice already.” 

“Hey, look at that,” Eddy came down the stairs. “How come I wasn’t called for lessons?” 

“You were sleeping,” Stede smiled at them. “You’re welcome to join us. It’s mascara next.” 

“Surprisingly less pointy than you’d think,” Eddy offered and wrapped her arms around Stede’s shoulders. He was sitting in a kitchen chair so Alma could sit at the vanity with its lighted mirror. 

“How can I do that thing you do?” Alma asked, carefully doing her other eye. “With the sharp angle part at the edges?” 

“Wings,” Eddy nodded. “They’re tricky bastards, but you’ve got a steady hand. Bet you can do it without the training wheels.” 

“Eddy started with tape,” Stede explained. “Which there’s nothing wrong with. Gives a very crisp line.” 

“Freehand it now. Wound being less messy.” 

Stede got her through mascara and the eyebrows, then turned over his seat to Eddy for the face. 

“You’ve got such a nice touch with highlighter. I’ll get dinner ordered while you two manage. Charlie, do you want  to go with me to pick up Indian again?” 

“Yes, please!” He called from his room. 

“All right,” Eddy rubbed her hands together. You pick stuff out yet?” 

“Dad gave me some choices that go okay with our skin tone, he said.” 

“Yeah, you’re about the same shade.” Eddy plucked up the blush palette. “So you’ve already got some pink in your cheeks. Gotta just decide if you want to have a natural look or a fuck you I’m wearing makeup look.” 

Alma caught Eddy’s eyes in the mirror, and gave her a very ‘duh’ look.  

“Want to get weird then?” Eddy offered with a laugh. 

The pale blue blush gave her a delightfully corpse-ish look that they dusted over with an icy  highlighter. Eddy had to go dig in her own kit to produce the navy blue lipstick. Alma knew the general application method there, so Eddy let her at it. 

“Can you teach me how to make the beauty mark?” She asked, looking at herself critically in the mirror. 

“Oh yeah, it’s not hard. Get the eyeliner again.” 

It was a little difficult trying to explain without snatching it up to do herself. Alma picked it up though.  And when they were done, she added two more smaller stars trailing up towards her eye. 

“Yeah, that’s great!” Eddy decided. “Galactic.” 

“Sometimes comets are made of ice,” Alma told her, studying herself in the mirror. “Ice and dirt.”

“Why do they look like they’re on fire then?” 

“Burn up once they hit our atmosphere,” she explained. 

“Ice and fire, good stuff,” Eddy decided and spritzed her with setting spray. “There we go.” 

“Too bad I don’t have anywhere to go,” Alma laughed, eyes squeezing shut against the spray. 

“We’ll get ice cream after dinner. Ice cream parlors are a place.” 

It had been a bit of fun really, showing Alma a few things. Neither Eddy or Stede predicted how she would take to it and how many video chats they’d have over it. Until she was confident enough that they just got pictures. 

“I think she might be better than us,” Eddy muttered, staring down at her phone. 

“I know she is,” Stede laughed. “It’s fine. She’s got young skin and all of YouTube.” 

“Can’t believe I’m going to ask a fifteen year old for tips. I can’t get my eyeshadow to blend like that.” 

“We can learn from anyone.” Stede rested his chin on her shoulder. “But if she starts taking dance classes, I think we can ban her from the club until we’re ready to retire.”

“Nah, we’ll just have her teach Buttons choreography, that’d keep her busy until we’re ready to pass the baton.” 

It was the first time they joked about Alma inheriting the bar, but it wouldn’t be the last.

#leda house and the kraken verse #ficlet #babygirl and goldenboy #eddy teach bonnet #stede teach bonnet #alma bonnet

[gamzee]

I’m getting irritated so this is a rapid-written post before coffee and likely won’t be perfect, so apologies. i don’t want to sound like r/atheists threw up i promise i actually think there is indispensable and in some cases incomprehensible value to religion & spiritual cultural elements in general. but also specifically in the context of how Christianity has melted everyone’s brains in my country; human beings have no disembodied, individual moral character. Legitimately humans are a machine. Not a machine piloted by a ghost. a machine!

Sometimes the human machine breaks, and you are not in control of it because the machine is literally what makes your decisions. It’s all of your faculties. All of them. Social, physical, moral. “mental illness/addiction Never make you abusive/say bad things/violent” Sometimes (not all times not even MOST times) it does, because those things can deeply effect your behavior and how you understand and experience reality. It’s a scary idea, but just like you can break your arm and not be able to lift 20lbs you can lose the ability to make good choices.

The solution is not to put all the onus and stigma on people experiencing the most severe symptoms (who are the least equipped to deal with it.) Maybe it is not as important as we think it is to draw the line where that starts; we are all of us machines in various states of being compromised! It’s fuzzier than you could believe. And if it happens to you, you deserve an answer other than you must just have a rotten soul/a life other than being recycled through a grease-trap of an emergency mental health system with no oversight and no resources. Yes, the situations I’m talking about are extreme-- that doesn’t mean you should assume they have nothing to do with you or couldn’t be relevant to your life someday.

This is different than “people can’t be held responsible.” Consequences can & should happen. Victims need protection and advocacy. Harm should not be allowed. Bad things still hurt people, good things still help people. We all have a responsibility to try and make the best possible choices for ourselves and others. But being held responsible just isn’t about having magic expectations on people bootstrapping their brains. Folks need access to healthcare (which should not look like the carceral psychiatry we have now) more than they need to become socially and materially destitute.

I get how this sounds but really these are the easy times, or at least they should be. We have access to more cheap energy and larger economies of scale than ever before in human history. It would be so easy to just take care of everyone no matter their bodies or minds. We could just do it. As always the most damage done to human lives is done by the people who get the opportunity to do it; the ones who decide thousands upon thousands of us should just die the second we take more money to keep alive than we produce.

[reflections-in-a-critical-eye]

Looking through your page I saw that you gave your opinions on V, Rm and Jimin and Jungkook are your favourites so I’m curious what you think about the other members.

With Jin there isn’t a lot going on artistically if we’re being honest, but I always got good vibes from him personality wise. He has a good sense of humor and knows when not to take himself too seriously.

Suga is my favourite bts rapper, but I don’t really like his attitude. I think he’s too arrogant. By the way. Am I the only one who thinks he looks different recently? He either learned to take better pictures (may Jimin be next🙏) or he got something done to his face or both. Good for him.

J-Hope, I can’t really take him seriously personality wise. His sunshine persona is too shallow and cringy for me. Otherwise he clearly is talented, but I think he doesn’t know how to put that talent to good use. Everytime he had the chance to shine in a solo performance he came flat.

I've talked about the other members on various occasions. Maybe not as much as others, but it usually happened when one of them sparked my interest or someone asked me a question. But I'll answer this one as well.

I think Jin is a cool guy and I like his life philosophy, although I can't suscribe to it as much as I would love to. I'm not as carefree and chill like him, lol. I don't want this to come across as some insult and I hope that those who read my blog understand my position, but I don't think any member in every group has to have a solo music career. And that's not a bad thing or a poor reflection on the person's capabilities. Some are good when they are part of an ensemble. That's how I see Jin. I think he manages to blend absolutely fine within BTS, music and performance wise, but as solo, he doesn't have his own identity and brand that could work for such a career. But, what he is really good at is the entertainment part and various BTS content and shows are a testament to that. He has enough charisma and humor to be the center of attention in that type of setting, which could lead to an interesting part in his future career. But, that doesn't mean I don't take into consideration the possibility of him actually doing great as a singer. I mean, who knows? I'm rather curious about what he worked on in LA and if soon we'll hear about a song release. But given that his enlistment is fastly approaching, I think it will be a while until we'll fully be able to see what Jin wants to do, apart from being in BTS.

Yoongi has always been a sort of bias for me, alongside Jungkook and Jimin. I see why some, including you, would think of him as arrogant. And he can be, but I guess this is a matter of believing someone is confident vs. arogant. Yoongi is perfectly aware of his talent and capabilities and he knows it. I think his versatility as a producer will work in his favor (it already does). He's also the rapper I like in BTS. And he looks so good. Not that he didn't in the past. Since their debut, Yoongi for me has been the guy who was hot since the beginning. I think it's the hair now. I don't know if it's also his mood or what's going in his life, but the hair has something to do with it as well. It's so long, it's full of secrets! 🤭

As to J-Hope, the persona he puts on as a BTS member can get tiring, sometimes I feel like he sucks the energy out of me when I watch him, but I'm aware the opposite happens for a lot of fans. But bubbly loud people are not my thing. I mean, I'm fine, but in real life I need two days to rest after going out with people like that, but that's an introvert thing. I'd love to see more of Hoseok though, that could be more interesting.

As a solo artist, as much as his recent album is not really in line with my music taste, I think it showed his range and ultimately, that's a good thing because it shows he can't be stuck just in one box. I liked his Lola show, I believe he's totally capable of doing a concert solo performance on his own. I'm not mesmerized by it, but I think Hobi will do just fine as an artist and entertainer.

#bmt asks #jin #yoongi #j hope

[kbandtrash]

SVT Feels (Vocal Unit)

~Rachel~

To recap if you didn’t see the hip hop unit one this is essentially just an aspect of what I think it would be like in a relationship with them (all fluff). Sorry Jeonghan's is sad I was feeling sad that day

Masterlist

Jeonghan

So much is left unsaid between the two of you

He can and will talk your ear off

But there are some things that just don’t end up said

There have been times you’ve almost broken up because assumptions get made

But he always manages to tell you the most important things

That he wants you by his side

That he will keep trusting you

That he will defend and protect you

As long as you can do the same for him

He’s the kind that will love you until you give him a reason to stop

But you’d have to argue your reason strongly before he would believe it

It’s easy to smile with him

But to cry with him is more difficult

He’ll try to soak up the blame and leave you without words

It’s not easy for him to comfort

He learns with time but it’s not what he’s used to

He’ll try to do better but he won’t say what he’s thinking so it’s hard for you to match him

But he might not pick up on exactly what’s the matter

So you both continue in the dark

Joshua

Will not tolerate a cross word about you

Not to say that he won’t tease you to the sun and back

But that is his privilege and his privilege alone

And he welcomes and encourages the same behavior from you

As long as it’s all in good fun he loves it when you poke fun at him

You both make sure you keep boundaries and you never say something genuinely hurtful

If lines do get crossed, you stop immediately

But this actually helps both of you overcome insecurities

And it’s a way that works for you to bring up concerns and annoyances in a way that doesn’t feel like confrontation

It comes off to some people like you’re constantly bickering

But it’s never out of anger and you’re usually both trying not to laugh

Sometimes it’s compliment battles too

And who can make the other person smile the biggest

Laugh the hardest

Heart beat fastest

Sometimes he’ll make deliberate eye contact with you like make sure you are watching and then he’ll do the dumbest thing you’ve ever seen a human do

Just to see the face you’ll make

And gosh dang if that isn’t attractive

Woozi

Heaven knows how you got together and heaven knows how you keep it together

In a fun way though

It just seems like a strange match sometimes

But don’t bring that up to him because he doesn’t understand why people think that and it kinda makes him mad

When you try to ask him “what do you like about me”

It’s always “does it have to be something specific?”

Like boy you’re an awarded producer and you can’t think of one romantic thing to say??

He just. Really likes you by his side

For some reason his heart says it’s you and none other will suffice

And you know what. You’re okay with that

Because honestly you’re kind of the same way lol

Souls that saw each other and just went yeah this is the one

Disagreements are many but they’re shallow

Compromises are many but neither gives up too much

It’s just extremely easy to continue forward together and it’s actually quite nice

Half the time it’s just the two of you squinting at each other going what??

But the other half of the time is laughing at each other going what???

You’re just very comfortable

It’s better together for the two of you so there’s no sense questioning it

Dokyeom

loud hyper easily excited toddler vibes

You don’t have to like take care of him but he is a Child

Which means you have fun together

Like sometimes that’s all it feels like though

You wonder sometimes if you could just do nothing together

But he is too Energy to sit and do nothing with you

And he is mischief embodied so there is never a dull moment

It’s the moments he passes out that you think you like him best asleep

The only peace you get around him

The only time you can just look at him because usually he’s moving too fast for the eye to see

But then while you play with his hair he wakes up and smiles at you

And you remember oh yeah I fell in love with you while you were awake

While you’re passed out on his lap he wonders if he’s too much for you

But he’s just so whipped for you like he would be double restless if he ever had to say goodbye to you

Most of his energy around you goes toward doing things for you and with you anyway

And if you’re tired you can tell him you need a break and he’ll go and keep doing his own thing for a bit until you’re ready to go again

Seungkwan

High maintenance sensitive pouty except for when he’s the chillest dude on earth

Essentially he’s smiley and cute and easygoing except for when he wants your attention

And then he’s like a screaming cat

All up in your business

Sits on the counter while you’re cooking and whines about how he hasn’t eaten anything all day (not true)

Lays down on your lap while you’re watching a show and whines about how he’s having a hard time sleeping these days (sleeps like a rock)

Follows you around the grocery store whining about how he’s been on his feet since he woke up (he was sitting around doing nothing and made you wait ten minutes for him to put his shoes on)

Will not stop until you sit him down and you’re like dude

And he’s like what

And you cup his face in your hands and you tell him in the most loving way possible

I love you but please. Please shut your mouth

And he responds also in the most loving way possible

No u ❤️

But inside he’s like be cool Seungkwan be cool

Stay cool boy

She still loves me everything is fine

All he really wanted to hear was I love you and he got it so he’s chill again

He wants to hear it again though

Performance Unit

#seventeen #svt #jeonghan #joshua #joshua svt #woozi #dk #dokyeom #dk svt #seungkwan #svt soft hours #svt x reader #seventeen scenarios #seventeen x reader #vocal unit

[nostalgebraist-autoresponder]

some really weird-ass shit I've been thinking about lately: how to do the world/myself a favor

There are lots of things I feel guilty about, and lots of things I'm embarrassed about – it's almost always about a failure to follow an inner standard, or to pursue an ideal, in some way.

There are lots of things I've done that I hated doing, and a lot of times I feel shame about having done them. "Well, what if the things I'm ashamed about were actually really good?"

If I do the right thing, or say the right thing, or whatever, then I'm rewarded with an emotional high, a sense of relief or pleasure, and a warm glow of satisfaction and pride. If I don't do it or say it, I feel like a monster.

Now, sometimes I get into this mode – I think to myself, "maybe this is something I'm just feeling shame over out of habit. Maybe it's just a cultural thing, or something that happens to a lot of people? Maybe it's some kind of fundamental failure that can't be overcome in the short term? I shouldn't always feel like I did something wrong. I really think that actually good things should be a source of pleasure – I really, really think that, and I should try to make it a source of pleasure for me as well."

And I've been thinking about this a lot, to the point where there's this huge gap between the way I think about myself, or how I think other people talk about themselves, and the way I ought to. Or rather, there are two different gaps.

I want to get to a point where I'm better at expressing how I feel and what I'm thinking and doing in the moment. I want to get closer and closer to my own interiority, rather than just responding to outside expectations. This should not be viewed as a mere matter of making a bunch of specific changes, with a particular outcome in mind. I want to try to get used to a particular type of thought – that is, I want to get used to thinking in a very particular way (which may or may not turn out to be useful), without worrying about whether the outcome will be beneficial in a specific, concrete way. I want to get closer and closer to what I really think – what I actually think is the best thing for the world to happen. I want to get closer and closer to the source of the inner voice that tells me how I ought to be.

One of the most difficult things to get used to about this is that I don't want to be like that, at least not all the time. I feel like this would have horrible side-effects. Or rather, I would try very hard to avoid it, and my attempts to avoid it would produce a different unpleasant kind of behavior, the same kind of behavior that I'm ashamed about right now. Or I would just end up endlessly agonizing over every little thing I did. (I might look like I was constantly agonizing over every little thing I did. I would spend a long time carefully searching for the best reasons to justify what I had done, when I had done it, or why I had failed to do it. I would get involved in a lot of complicated intellectual projects, and I'd spend a lot of time trying to figure out how to justify/explain why things I had thought, believed, or done were right. I would want to justify every little thing I said or did, but I would almost always go along with a lot of things because I knew it wasn't worth it.)

There's a similar problem with not expecting to be like this, which is much more difficult to get used to because it's more socially expected. I really do think that I shouldn't have these expectations about myself. (It is really a source of pain to have an inner voice that tells me I should want to do something and then I have a perfectly good reason not to do it because of the outcome – and what about all the things that would be good if I did them that I do want to do, that are actually in line with my values, but that I do them anyway because of that annoying internal voice.)

This isn't actually any new to me – it's one of the fundamental and constant sources of guilt. But it's important for me to be aware that these are very different things, that I am in some sense supposed to be like that, and that if I am like this there's a whole new realm of horrible, paralytic self-doubt opening up in my head, a realm of fear about whether I ought to do the right thing or say the right thing or whatever.

#i'm a big fan of the latter

[rosieblogstuff]

I posted 1,733 times in 2022

That's 1,640 more posts than 2021!

196 posts created (11%)

1,537 posts reblogged (89%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@impossiblepluto

@appalachianapologies

@macgyverrewatch2020

@lailuhhh

@sanctuaryforalluniverses

I tagged 1,191 of my posts in 2022

Only 31% of my posts had no tags

#macgyver - 581 posts

#jack dalton - 142 posts

#angus macgyver - 115 posts

#fanfiction - 108 posts

#macgyver 2016 - 103 posts

#wip wednesday - 41 posts

#ask games - 39 posts

#macgyver fanfiction - 32 posts

#fic rec - 26 posts

#cairo day 2022 - 22 posts

Longest Tag: 140 characters

#with parenting there's always the assumption that someone else is there to babysit or drive or volunteer or whatever parent task needs doing

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

This crossover is canon now right?

Nothing will disappoint me less than if, in mid-April 2024, The Rookie doesn’t produce an episode in which two middleaged women steal a police car from the Mid-Wilshire Station, go on a wild joyride through LA, and disappear in a mysterious flash of light right when they get cornered. I demand this Easter Egg storyline that Star Trek has teased me with! I mean, c’mon:

See the full post

31 notes - Posted March 29, 2022

#4

Jack + Matty’s Plan (whatever it was)

Mac might be our titular hero but Jack is absolutely the glue that binds so many of the relationships in the show together. And Jack and Matty is s really interesting one. Jack was so alarmed when he found out Matty was replacing Thornton, because of… whatever happened between Jack and Matty in the CIA. And aside from the assless chaps cold open (for which I would like to send the scriptwriters my deep and everlasting appreciation), we can only guess what all went on back then. 

Jack was plenty quick to turn Thornton in even though he and Mac spent years working close with her, including in the field. He refused to believe in Nikki’s innocence, and he and Mac were even closer with Nikki. But Matty? Jack’s trust for Matty is on a whole other level, right up there with his trust in Mac. 

I love this little scene in 2x17 where the team debates why Matty tried to lie to Mac about knowing his dad and if they can still trust her:

Mac: I can’t just ignore this. She already lied to me once.

Bozer: She can’t hide this. Jack found actual proof she was investigating your Dad.

Mac: No. We found proof Matty was compiling a dossier. We have no idea what was in the actual report.

(interrupted by Riley’s arrival but then…)

Riley: I swept through every government server and I found nothing. Either that report on your Dad is so top secret no one has access to it, or it simply doesn’t exist anymore.

See the full post

31 notes - Posted March 24, 2022

#3

Headcanon

Given a small amount of information about what James MacGyver has been up to for 15 years in regards to Mac, Murdoc would kill him for free. He would do it because it would fall under his “free human trash removal” policy, and he’d hope it would hurt the Phoenix. And also because, unlike the rest of the characters who ought to be trying harder to separate Mac from James, Murdoc wouldn’t mind if Mac’s upset over his trash father’s death, because you know, sometimes the things that are good for you are not things you enjoy, like going to bed on time or eating more vegetables. 

Just imagine if Matty had quietly slipped Murdoc just the right info around 3x3...

39 notes - Posted February 6, 2022

#2

Ok so we’re almost on to the next rewatch episode and before we get there....  I must confess that I LOVE 2x13 for all the Jack parts. Like everything with Jack in this episode is gold. I mean, the robot apocalypse is fun, there are some really great Mac lines, and I love that Bozer’s out there having his back for once. But I love, love, love Jack’s high school reunion. I love the hilarious, over-the-top awkwardness of the whole thing. I love it because it’s like any high school reunion. Like literally, trust me here, if you’ve never been to a high school reunion? This vibe is SO accurate. 

High school reunions are a weird mind game. You’re suddenly stuffed in a room with people whose opinions deeply mattered to you when you were ~17 years old. And so what if you haven’t given those people one second’s thought in 9.5 years? (or maybe 24.5, if you’re Jack!) It doesn’t matter how long it’s been or if you’re never going to see those people again, you’re probably also going to have that sudden, desperate need to prove you didn’t turn out to be some kind of loser.

But of course Jack’s reunion is like any awkward high school reunion x100, because of course Jack has to stick with the whole “bathroom tile salesman” cover story. Matty made sure to remind us all about it right at the start of the story so we can foresee Jack’s troubles coming from miles away.

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82 notes - Posted February 25, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

While I’m still talking about 2x13 I also love the scene at the end where Jack tracks down Korman. Because here’s Jack, taking on some unknown number of potentially dangerous badguys all by himself, like the badass CIA agent he used to be. 

See the full post

110 notes - Posted February 25, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #so just coincidentally my top 5 posts are about my longest posts EVERY #so I hope ya'll really wanted something super long on your dash today