#I could be emo about a lot of specific people but like. in general. if I have ever SPOKEN to you I am thankful to have met you | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

pasta-in-the-pudding · 1 year

Note

Hey could we get some general headcanons about Splendor, Candy Pop and Jason? ^^

Ah yes, the best boys <333

Thank you for requesting!

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Splendor

He, along with the rest of his species, dont really have genders, so most of the time he just rolls with whatever people refer to him as. In his mansion, he's actually known as "Mother" due to his motherly nature with his children

He's also aroace (though that wouldnt apply to x reader fics)

He's the second youngest of all his brothers

He generally tries to look like a clown (hence why he has a smiling face complete with eyes and his brothers don't) that way children don't feel scared around him

He's truly great with everyone, not just kids

He has his own mansion, but instead of angsty emos, his house is more of a safe space for all of the unwanted or unhappy children

9'6" so very tall

I imagine his voice to sound like a mixture of Sundrop and Cheese sandwich

He smells familiar, no specific scent, just something you know you've smelt before but can't quite place your finger on

He visits Slender at his mansion the most, usually bringing candies for everyone

He's become known as "That guy with the face and full snickers bars" around Slender's mansion

He doesnt tend to go into the mortal realm too often, but when he does it's when he senses a troubled soul in need of immediate help

And when he does have those senses, he usually brings them back into his mansion in the underworld, giving them all the hospitality and comfort they could ever desire

Splendorman is an oddball, that's for sure

I also like to imagine he says weird things sometimes, just to throw people off guard

"Beware the men with the tilted hats....they arent worth it"

He likes rick and morty, but doesn't actually watch the show he just likes the colors

His favorite meal is octopus tentacles

Candypop

Bro doesn't know what they are

They don't really have a gender either, so most of the time he just identifies as male or non binary

He's also into men (again, doesnt necessarily apply to x reader)

They usually aren't seen a lot around slender's mansion, mostly because they, Lj and Jason tend to hang out in the uppermost level of the mansion and giggle around like the chaotic neutrals they are <3

They absolutely order starbucks, bribe another creep to bring it up to them, and then gossip with each other about all of the other creeps

Most of the time they spare their dear friend who brought up their orders though. They arent horrible, now

They smell like literal musk and jolly ranchers 💀

It's very upsetting

He likes to just bang his hammer mallet thingy against the wall for absolutely no reason

They're like 8'11"

He gets a kick out of seeing people jump from the BOOM

Their face doesn't actually look like how it is seen in pictures, most of that is actually makeup

The only natural things is their skin tone, their sharp teeth, and their hair and eye colors

They have a very deep chainsmokers voice

Sorry, I don't make the rules

They unironically listen to one direction and 5 seconds of summer on full blast

"BABY YOU LIGHT UP MY WORLD LIKE NOBODY ELSE"

Lj definitely had to bang on their wall a few times with his fist just to get them to shut up a few times

The only times he is seen around the mansion, hes normally sliding around the hardfloor on socks, avoiding everyone as best they can because lord knows if someone actually spoke to them theyd just evaporate, never to be seen again

Jason the Toymaker

When he first manifested in this world, he was mostly just trying to look human so he could get away with inhabiting this place

So he identifies as "male" and has traditional male anatomy

He is interested in anyone romantically speaking, but does have a fem lean (doesn't apply to x reader)

He has the dantiest little hands <3

6'2", so he's definetly not the tallest creep. but he's up there

His fingers are long and slender, as well as long nails that help him with sewing

His skin is really smooth

And his hair is really well taken care of

He just has the best self care in general

He's always working on some project, wether that be making a doll, or sewing a fancy tea party dress for sally that she absolutely needed, his hands are always busy

He can get frustrated very easily though, and thats kind of a bummer

He doesn't have anger issues necessarily, but he's very sensetive and emotional, so anything said to him might tick him off into a stream of tears or a flurry of rage

He's normally one of the only ones to actually clean around the house

His hair color depends on his mood

For example, if hes really upset, his hair is black, his true form is white, and he actually uses a spell to keep his hair red the rest of the time

He's that one friend

You know the one

The nice one?

Yeah that's him

He smells like old fabrics and dust

But sometimes if he's feeling ✨ spicy ✨ he'll wear some sweet smelling perfume

Never cologne, he doesnt like how harsh it smells

He likes to watch cartoons with sally, and sing with sally

He's simply wonderful <3

#creepypasta #jason the toymaker #candy pop #splendorman #candy pop x reader #jason the toymaker x reader #splendorman x reader #creepypasta x female reader #creepypasta x y/n #creepypasta x you #creepypasta headcanon #splendorman headcanons #slender mansion #slender brothers

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philyaoi · 3 months

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as someone who wasnt here at the time (was a fan from about 2011-2013) what exactly defines the "softlaunch era" pre-coming out that i hear you and others refer to?

you've come to the right place cuz this is the era when i truly became a Phannie... "gay softlaunch" is generally considered 2017-18, but to be more specific it was october 31, 2016-june 13, 2019!

before they came out this was also referred to as "post-baking universe" referencing the halloween 2016 monster pops video that had an (at the time) abnormal amount of raunchy humor and just general derangedness. nothing like it is today, but that point felt very significant and dan even brought it up in liveshows like yeah idk what happened there and when phil called a peach an ass in a gaming video dan said "we live in a post-baking universe" (i believe fans coined the term tho).

people have also called it the "glass closet era" which is a divisive name for a lot of people cuz "glass closet" can be seen as kind of a mean term and it implies like, stereotyping or speculating or the "we been knew" behavior dan had talked about in BIG. which i understand that feeling, but i don't think that's what was happening, because the way i see it was queer flagging. ways they could show a little bit who they really were without saying it just yet. they weren't Out out, but they were just like. openly talking about attraction to men and finding men hot and not calling it a Man Crush or anything. dan would bring up queerness more often in liveshows, which hes mentioned queer artists and stuff before but now it was also making jokes about like.. being in a gas leak man porn fantasy in his first livestream of 2017 LMAO. phil would make a lot more innuendos, which hes always done, but now he wasnt pretending like he didnt know what he was saying. dan started wearing a single hoop earring on his right ear. this is an old school form of queer flagging, in The Olden Days (im too lazy to look up when but like my 70-something year old history teacher knew about this) if a man had an earring on his left ear, he's straight, and if he had one on his right, he's gay. that one's pretty subtle if you don't know much about queer history and there were Great Debates over whether or not we should take it to mean he is gay, but personally i saw it as like. he was letting us know without needing to say the G word out loud just yet!

i think a really important part of this era was even outside of directly discussing queerness, they were both trying to become more authentic online and figuring out how to do that without compromising their own privacy. dan stopped straightening his hair and rebranded and opened up about his mental health. phil's authenticity journey seemed a bit slower and wasn't as overt or seemingly drastic as dan's was, but it was happening! he changed up his hair!!! which yes its kinda silly to talk abt dnp's hair but the emo fringe was Their Brand. phil in particular said that, the emo fringe was a comfort place but he was feeling like he was trapped in having it forever because it was Who He Was, so it was a huge deal for him! he opened up a little bit about his physical health, both of them were a bit more honest about all the stress and anxiety they were dealing with (the mukbang is a pretty good video where they talk about that and an interesting one to watch in retrospect) and their whole 2018 tour was themed around whether they should Give The People What They Want or do what they wanted to do.

god i talk too much ANYWAY then dan disappeared in 2019 and phil was manning the helm for a good five and a half months and then the Big Gay hit! the Hard Launch Era if you will :) and now i would say 2023-present is the Unhinged Era so i have no clue what the hell their next move is gonna be...

#ofc there were also signs before 2016 'wtf even is your sexuality'#but at that point there was still a veil over everything ykwim?#myrambles #also sorry im such a phillie i like barely mention dans authenticity journey BUT I JUST FEEL LIKE #IVE TALKED ABT IT A LOT BEFORE SO IDK WHAT MORE I COULD SAY #softlaunch

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fandomshifter · 4 months

Text

Tim Wright & Brian Thomas in my AU

[ I know about Marble Hornets and both Tim and Brian are not proxies but in my AU + DR they are!! ]

Tim Wright!!

He owns a red truck that he stole from one of his victims when he first became a proxie

Him and Brian are dating and have been together for a few years

Tim has a strong accent when he gets angry and a lot of people can't take him seriously because of it

He has a CD collection from all different types of music but mainly what I would class as divorced dad music so; Linkin Park, Nickleback, AC/DC, Foo fighters Etc..

He can play a banjo and guitar and was in a band in college with a few of his old friends

Still has gaps in his memory from Marble Hornets and watching it is banned in the mansion, Both Brian and Tim are not allowed to access it

His room is the closest to “The Slendermans” office since he has been in contact with Slenderman for the longest out of anyone in the mansion.

Has a massive obsession with lip balm and has a stash inside one of his draws in his room

Was an Emo in his teen years and still sometimes endulges in some of the songs but not the fashion since he says ‘he's too old to dress like that’

Still has to take meds and regular mental check ups with EJ which made them have a close bond which not a lot of people know about

Brian Thomas!!

Is actually the head proxie, not Tim like a lot of people would think. He's more strategic with how he does thing such as stalking and killing victims.

Also wanted to be in a band in college so he learned how to play guitar aswell and can sing decently

Rides a motorbike and has a van that he both stole. He won't let anyone touch his motorbike and only Tim or a responsible Creep can use the van [ so not Jeff at all ].

Was the first person to be made a proxie, but has had a shorter connection with slenderman than Tim. He was made a proxie first because he was more compliant.

His music taste consists of metal and lots of it, like any genere of metal. [ I'm not much if a metal fan but you can say in the comments any specifics if you want ]

His bedroom is the cleanest in the house because he doesn't like mess in his room and many people come into his room for favours and doesn't want to seem like a messy, unkempt person. [ He cares about people view him ]

He has many scars on his face from old piercings he had in his youth, the only open piercings he has is his Lobe piercings, which he occasionally wears ear rings in.

Alot of people in the mansion look up to him and his leadership skills. He is very good at what he does and due to his reputation he always has to be better than everyone, it gave him an ego.

He loves cooking food and usually will be in the kitchen baking or cooking stress away, he never could because he was always on the move but now he found a love for it.

He was a pot head in his college days and occasionally still smokes it but usually late at night when everyone is asleep, he climbs up to the roof and looks at the stars while smoking.

MASKY & HOODIE

I don't know enough information to represent DID realistically, and I still think after doing research I would still get it wrong and I don't want to upset anyone!!

So I decided Masky & Hoodie are parts of the operator, the mark [ ⦻ ] given to a proxie makes it easier for Slenderman to use your body for his biding, like a possession. He hates getting his hands dirty so he does it through his proxies bodies. However that's a last resort since it has very bad side effects for humans.

They use the names, Hoodie & Masky when doing missions because they want to separate themselves for what they are doing. So usually it's just Tim and Brian doing the missions but if they refuse, slenderman WILL make you do it.

[ Hope this all makes sense and you enjoyed reading them!! Don't forget to ask for the discord server link and Ask for me to write something!! ]

#creepypasta #creepypasta x reader #slenderman #hoodie #brian thomas #brian thomas x reader #masky marble hornets #tim masky #masky #marble hornets #tim wright

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geniusphilester · 6 months

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rory’s guide to where the howlters might move

i was talking with @underthisweather about this because we both play sims 4 and/or watch simmers that aren’t dan and phil play. there are a lot of people more well-versed in the sims 4 game and the dapg series than i am, but as someone who deliberately bought sims packs to get all the playable worlds, i can at least give it a guess.

i briefly considered making this a tier-list video but i have WAY too much on my plate to wrangle making a template and editing video right now, so quick post it is. i use all the world names, so feel free to look around youtube and other places online if you want to actually see the worlds.

Guidelines

this is all residential worlds, so vacation worlds and secret worlds aren’t being ranked. sorry, batuu (/j).

obviously, willow creek has been their home for a million years, so that’s not in the running, but i’ll talk about it a little bit before we get into the other worlds.

even though i’m not making a tier list video, i am making tiers because it’s fun. they are:

-top contenders: my best guesses for where dil, tabitha, dalien, and nuki land -possible: not my guesses, but also i won’t be completely humiliated if they pick one of these -for the bit: not likely, but if they have a particular joke or personal attachment or storyline in mind, that could keep them in the running -nah: probably not happening

if you want to jump to the end and skip my blathering, that’s where the full tier list will be.

a quick primer as to what we’re talking about here:

-“worlds” are a group of neighborhoods sorted by a general theme or biome or both.

-“neighborhoods” are a group of buildings/spaces grouped into a loose theme. while sims 4 isn’t open world like sims 3, it has wandering spaces between lots that don’t require additional loading that form the connective tissue of the neighborhoods

-“lots” are where specific buildings/houses go. there are a variety of lots: residential, commercial, etc., and they can have specific traits to help or challenges to make things harder, much like you can give sims traits. residential is our main focus here

-each lot has a grid size. 64x64 is huge; 20x15 is a lot smaller.

here’s what they’ve told us about what’s going to happen, pulled directly from the transcript (timestamp):

Phil: We are gonna either build a house from scratch or buy a house, but we're moving. Dan: We're shaking things up. Phil: To a new neighborhood. Dan: The Howlters are getting out of here. Look, it's that time. They lived a whole life. They were ready to retire. They got this three-bedroom massive house. They don't need all of this stuff. Phil: They don't. Dan: They need to start a new life in a new neighborhood now that their gay kids are out of there and they've got an emo and a Shiba Inu to raise. Phil: Yeah. Think about it, though. We're gonna have new neighbors, new friendships, new experiences, new jobs.

generally what we know/can guess:

-prebuilt or custom-built residences are most likely, but they can also bulldoze and build on other kinds of lots without cheats. i summarize the amount of lots each neighborhood has to give you an idea of how many potential neighbors might be around.

-dan is implying they’re going to downsize, so a smaller lot seems likely

-it sounds like dil and tabitha will be getting new jobs? that probably won’t have a ton of impact on the world/lot because jobs are largely “go somewhere else to work and you either can watch or not” or “you work from home but the neighborhood doesn’t have much impact here”. still, good to know

Willow Creek

just wanna give a quick shoutout to willow creek, dil’s home world from the beginning. it’s a base game world, and it’s got a lot of goodies: excellent starter homes, three empty lots (the one they used is a 30x20, which is not as big as they get, but is also not the smallest), notable townies (pancakes family!), a nice park, and a little downtown area. the vibes are distinctly southern USA in biome and architecture

neighborhoods

sage estates: mansions! two residential lots (one occupied by default, one prebuilt empty).

pendula view: historic section, featuring the goths. four lots (three prebuilt, one empty 30x20).

courtyard lane: current home of the howlters and pancakes! in their game, all five lots have houses (shout out to the owl slide).

foundry cove: starter homes. five lots (four prebuilt, one empty 30x20).

crawdad quarter: park, museum, nightclub, gym, library

Oasis Springs

another base game world! VERY deserty, specifically with a slightly palm springs (southern CA, USA) vibe? they have a lot of vague deserts in the sims 4 without actually considering biome too deeply, which i can say because i’m a high-desert queer. anyway.

neighborhoods

acquisition butte: midcentury and kind of mission-style mansions. four residential lots (three prebuilt, one empty 40x30).

skyward palms: two residential lots with mansions.

bedrock strait: the description calls it “delightfully kitschy”. five residential lots (four prebuilt, one empty 30x20).

parched prospect: single-family homes similar to bedrock strait, maybe with less kitsch? five residential lots (four prebuilt, one empty 30x20)

mirage canyon: downtown area, with museum, lounge, park, gym, and bar.

upsides

i wouldn’t call dan and phil desert gays, but irl palm springs is pretty gay! there are a lot of options here to renovate that aren’t giant but aren’t tiny, either. the howlters could get invested in the landgraab drama, if they wanted. the weather is also a lot less rainy than most other words, which means fewer thunderstorms (a big plus for my gameplay, hard to say for them).

downsides

as previously stated, i don’t see dan and phil as desert gays. oasis springs isn’t their architectural style, and emo dalien would probably be miserable (this could be an upside for story reasons, but i’m leaning toward it not working specifically here). plus, oasis springs is an early sims world, and i feel like they’ll go newer for the fun of it.

tier ranking

i deliberated over this one for a second because it’s mostly a no, but i think it’s just possible enough to put in “Possible”. the very bottom, though.

Newcrest

honestly, i’m hesitant to call newcrest a world all its own because it’s basically willow creek without anything in it. there are no preset buildings here, just three neighborhoods with five empty lots.

neighborhoods

bridgeview: lots are 2 20x15, 2 30x20, 1 40x30

llama lagoon: lots are 1 30x20, 1 30x30, 2 40x30, 1 50x40

ridgeline drive: lots are 3 30x20, 1 40x20, 1 40x30

upsides

one word: versatility. i play here all the time because it’s easy to make a tiny home (my favorite way to build my sims’ skills) on the smallest lots and build a full town around them, complete with all the houses, neighbors, and lot types you want. for youtubers who are into storytelling, it’s very appealing.

downsides

i honestly don’t see dan and phil as youtubers who want to make their own towns. they could pull from the gallery entirely without taking up too much time, but that feels too stale for their playstyle and personal aesthetics, and i think they want to shake things up more. it wouldn’t even make a good “we said we were moving but we didn’t say it would be different” bit.

tier ranking

nah

Magnolia Promenade

technically possible, but i doubt it’s happening: it’s a similar style to willow creek with three retail lots and one empty 30x20 residential lot.

tier ranking

nah

Windenburg

the world that came with get together, which we know dan and phil have. quality-wise, it’s one of the best worlds in the whole game: a bunch of lots, beautiful architecture, variety in neighborhoods. it has a real northwestern european vibe.

neighborhoods

windslar: mix of large houses and smaller. six residential lots with one empty 40x30, and a chalet gardens lot, including hedge maze.

olde platz: old downtown of windenburg with a bunch of housing but no empty lots. four residential, bar, library, cafe, nightclub, and an ancient ruins lot.

lykke centre: new downtown of winderburg. park, cafe, gym, nightclub, and a giant pool.

the crumbling isle: rich people on an island! five residential lots with one empty 20x20.

upsides

versatility, but with structure. building a new house on that 20x20 island lot seems very possible to me, but they could take one of the empty prebuilts or evict someone easily. a lot of neighbors to mess with, and a lot of destinations to play in. i visit lykke center’s nightclub and pool in my games all the time.

downsides

not only would i say tudor is not dan and phil’s style (which is a lot of the non-mansion housing), i would say that, despite the slightly more germanic or nordic bent, it might be too familiar in some ways? but the bigger impediment i think is that it isn’t silly enough for their playstyle and doesn’t fit any of the characters. emo dalien probably won’t pub crawl, you know?

tier ranking

more “Possible” than oasis springs, but not the highest

San Myshuno

the world that came with city living, and dab and evan’s stomping grounds! big city and mostly apartment living.

neighborhoods

spice market: listed as a “family neighborhood”. six apartment units in two buildings, one 30x30 single-family house prebuilt, one karaoke bar.

arts quarter: the “bohemian” neighborhood where the humor and hijinks festival happens. six apartment units, including a penthouse, and an art museum.

fashion district: the “young and trendy” neighborhood where the romance festival and geekcon happen. six apartment units, including a penthouse, and a karaoke bar.

uptown: the “luxurious” neighborhood, with four apartment units, a gym, and a rooftop lounge. the city park’s next to this one.

upsides

we know this is VERY dan and phil because dab and evan already live here (and their place looks like the dnp manchester flat)! it would be very funny if dab’s parents showed up and we saw dnp playing dab like he was constantly annoyed they were cramping his style. i would also enjoy if they demolished the standalone house and built a city-style house like forever home. not that i’m trying to get a house tour by any means possible or anything.

downsides

this isn’t different enough, and that’s why i mostly think it won’t happen. i think it would only happen if dab and evan went elsewhere.

tier ranking

For the bit. i think they’ll go a different direction but they also can’t resist being self-referential, so i can’t rule it out entirely

Forgotten Hollow

the world that came with vampires. if you’ve watched this sims series in full, you’ve seen it before. i play in it constantly, but most people aren’t into occult sims like i am or build cemetery lots to keep all their dead sims. for some reason.

lots (because there aren’t distinct neighborhoods)

garliclauter place: empty prebuilt, 30x20, vampire nexus lot trait

vatore house: prebuilt, 30x30

vlad’s house: prebuilt, 40x30

fledermaus bend: empty lot, 30x30

widowshild townhome: prebuilt, 30x20, registered vampire lair lot trait

there’s also some non-lot space that’s fun to hang out in, like the central park (that isn’t a park lot) and wilderness behind most of the lots

tier ranking

just skipping to this because it’s an easy “nah”: they’ve been here before and purely did it as an alternate-universe spooky week episode.

Brindleton Bay

the world that came with dogs and cats (and the first canon gay sim townies)! we know they have it because nuki exists. rainy seaside vibes.

neighborhoods

sable square: listed as both the “cultural center” of the world, but as a “monument” to their pets. three residential lots with one empty 30x20, a park with the dog-friendly lot trait, and a vet clinic.

cavalier cove: seaside residential of varying sizes. five residential lots with two empty 30x20s.

whiskerman’s wharf: touristy downtown wharf. three residential lots with one empty 40x30, a bar, and a lounge.

deadgrass isle: island with a museum lot. also has a lighthouse i think you can run around in, but i haven’t tried it.

upsides

if they were doing nuki-focused story or were looking to fill a house entirely with cats and dogs, this would be the place to go. maybe the howlters could have gay friends and live next door to the heckings! dan and phil yelling about the feral/townie cats would be a delight.

downsides

honestly, i’m just not a huge fan of this world. it never runs well on my computer, it rains all the time (which i like in real life, but not the sims), and if i have pets, i’m always in the vet clinic getting that stuff to work. obviously this is a ymmv thing, but i think it’s too bland for dan and phil as well.

tier ranking

low in “Possible”. i think oasis springs makes more sense, honestly.

Del Sol Valley

the world from get famous, which is basically a giant los angeles clone.

neighborhoods

mirage park: three residential lots, including one empty 50x40

starlight boulevard: the downtown area. two lounges, one museum, one nightclub, one park.

the pinnacles: mansion area. three prebuilt residential lots.

tier ranking

i’m gonna put this in “nah” quickly because dab is pursuing the actor career and might come here if he wants fame, but it’s more of a world to visit than live in. i don’t hate it or anything, but there’s few sims to interact with, and it wasn’t well-built. (one of the mansions has no bathrooms!) i think the only potential spoiler here is if dan and phil (mostly dan) wanted an outlet to rant about the entertainment industry, but they can do that without moving to del sol valley.

Strangerville

came with the pack of the same name! this is different than every other world because there’s a built-in narrative about the government and weird behavior, but it also has the neighborhood structure.

neighborhoods

secret lab: this is part of the narrative and is a single lot, but it gets its own neighborhood mention because, if you look up the map, it takes up the entire upper left corner.

shady acres: rich part of strangerville. five residential lots with two empty 30x20s.

strangerville plaza: main part of strangerville. four prebuilt residential lots, one library, and one bar.

upsides

honestly, that i have any is going to probably set me apart from any sims player-dapg fan combo. i think the red desert look is nicely different from the willow creek look, the build items are sometime underrated, and dan’s area 51 reference in the latest video could have been a hint. dil has been super close to alien weirdness; might as well follow that to its logical conclusion!

downsides

i don’t actually think dan and phil will do strangerville’s story because they want something a little more different. the richer housing in this world isn’t super well-built, and i can’t imagine them building a trailer in a trailer park for fun (although they should; i enjoy those kinds of build videos a lot).

tier ranking

For the bit

Sulani

the world that came with island living, probably most directly inspired in style by hawaii. this is a fun one because one of the neighborhoods is built on a volcano, multiple lots include sections of water, and you can turn into a mermaid! or, you know, just have a drink on the beach.

neighborhoods

lani st. taz: four residential lots including one empty 50x50, and a beach lot

mua pel’am: the volcano neighborhood! three residential lots, including one empty 40x30, and a lot of fun exploratory territory.

ohan’ali town: main town area. four prebuilt residential lots, one beach lot, one bar

upsides

very different than willow creek, good if they want to pursue a “dil and tabitha are kind of retired and immortal, why not go to the beach” storyline, generally just a good world.

downsides

if “pale nerds move to the desert” is a bad idea, “pale nerds move to the beach” isn’t much better. the off-the-grid options seem VERY unlikely!

tier ranking

no offense to sulani, but “nah” seems most likely

Glimmerbrook

realm of magic’s residential world! (there’s a portal to another world in this one, but you can’t live there without mods/cheats.) another world where i like it in theory, but the construction could be better, and it’s mostly centered around an occult type.

lots

glimmerbrook watch: empty 30x20

charm family: residential 40x20

amicable acolytes: residential 30x20

brooks bridge borough: residential 30x20

elixirs and brews: bar

tier ranking

nah

Britechester

discover university’s world! most of the housing here is specifically for students, but not all of it.

neighborhoods

foxbury university: the newer school! four university housing lots

gibbs hill: the town part of the college town. three prebuilt housing lots, one bar, and one library.

university of britechester: the older school. four university housing lots

tier ranking

i’m putting this in “Top contenders” with an asterisk: i don’t think it’ll happen yet, and if/when it does happen, it’ll be because dalien graduated high school and moved to university, which was implied in the latest video to be a likely path for dalien. my understanding is that university plays work better if the students live out of the world, but imagine dan and phil passing up a chance to talk about their uni experiences. i bet dalien will live his conflicted alien life in the dorms, at least to start with.

Evergreen Harbor

eco lifestyle’s world! it doesn’t have a strict narrative like strangerville does, but it’s built specifically for residents to vote on community initiatives and with mechanics that change the look depending on how environmentally conscious everyone’s being.

neighborhoods

grims quarry: former quarry turned residential neighborhood. three prebuild single-family lots and one apartment lot.

port promise: former industrial port trying to be reclaimed by the community. three prebuilt residential lots, one bar, one community space.

conifer station: former train area turned residential. two prebuilt residential lots, one apartment space, one community space.

upsides

i honestly think this one has a lot of potential, both in regards to dan and phil’s tastes and storyline options. going from strict scientist toward environmentalist would be a great route for dil, and the household could live in an apartment without being in the city, if they felt like downsizing that much. dan specifically has a reformed nihilist vibe that would go really well here, and dumpster diving/woohooing is a LOT of fun.

downsides

maybe not glamorous enough? dalien would probably hate it, which is not a hard no for me lol. they might want a world with more neighbors to torment, too. i’m also not sure if dan and phil have eco lifestyle, are interested, or even really know about it.

tier ranking

Top contenders, even if dan and phil don’t know it

Mt. Komorebi

snowy escape’s world, which is definitely japanese in influence, but not tokyo: it’s specifically more rural mountain areas. it’s also unique in that it’s half residential world, half vacation world, and the mountain is snowy even if you don’t have the seasons pack.

neighborhoods

yukimatsu: mountain peak with ski slopes! two rental lots, one onsen bathhouse, and one empty residential 50x50.

senbamachi: old part of town. three prebuilt residential lots, one bar, one park.

wakaba: new part of town. three residential lots, including one empty 20x15, one lounge, one rental.

upsides

look, it’s japan. dan and phil like japan (to put it mildly) and this pack melds older style with modern luxury real well. the builds are really solid as well; this was around the time when the sims team got simmers involved in making buildings, and it makes a big difference. the one time i played with dan and phil sims, they lived in mt. komorebi.

downsides

the combination of sports and vacation makes this a bit less likely as a moving destination, i think.

tier ranking

For the bit. it’s borderline imo, but if they go here, it will largely be because dan and phil love japan.

Henford-on-Bagley

cottage living’s world, which is very deliberately rural england in style.

neighborhoods

the bramblewood: mostly woods, with some buildings. three prebuilt residential lots, one park.

old new henford: the real farming neighborhood. four residential lots, including one empty 50x40.

finchwick: the village. two residential lots and one bar.

tier ranking

nah. if i think windenburg might be too familiar, henford-on-bagley definitely is, and i doubt they’ll do farming gameplay.

Tartosa

the world for the still-broken wedding stories pack! mediterranean in inspiration, mostly italy, i think.

neighborhoods

terra amorosa: waterfall, bridge, and buildings. three residential lots, including one empty 30x30, and one wedding venue.

porto luminoso: seaside town. three residential lots, including one empty 40x20, one rental lot, and one lounge.

tier ranking

nah. if we go here, it’ll be for the devan wedding, but even then i don’t think it’s super their style. (tbf i haven’t played here a ton, but the lounge is fun to visit)

Moonwood Mill

the werewolf pack’s world! i think this is a bit more liveable for most people than the vampire world, if only because there’s some variety in building type, but it’s still an occult pack.

lots

volkov house: occupied residential, 40x30

new moon shack: empty prebuilt residential, 20x15

the moonwood mill library: library

grimtooth bar and bunker: bar

prowler’s patch: empty residential lot, 30x30

tier ranking

nah. can i will another alternate universe episode like the vampire one into being, though?

Copperdale

the high school years world! mountain western united states vibe with a lake dividing the town in two. the map is beautiful, honestly.

neighborhoods

rockridge heights: the high school gets its own two-part neighborhood, divided into a high school building for regular school gameplay and an auditorium for things like prom, graduation, and a job fair.

prescott square: downtowny area. three prebuilt residential lots, one library, one thrift and bubble tea store (random, but high school years comes with thrifting as a money-making opportunity for teens).

plumbite cove: waterside area. three residential lots, including one empty 20x20, one rental, and one park, but my favorite part is the rabbit hole amusement park (you don’t get to see anyone go on the rides, but it’s a common afterparty destination).

upsides

if you ask me, this is the most likely neighborhood for howlter relocation! they specifically referenced high school years as dalien’s next stop, there’s a small empty lot to build on, it’s one of the newer sims expansions, and it’s different enough from willow creek to make it interesting while not reinventing the wheel. the social opportunities for dalien will be big! even if they don’t move here, we’re definitely going to see it a lot.

downsides

i do think dan and phil’s tastes have gotten more upscale over the years, so they outgrew willow creek, and copperdale might be a little quaint/small for them, too. doesn’t change the fact that dil and tabitha still have a teen.

tier ranking

Top contenders

San Sequoia

the growing together world! seaside town grown up; probably san francisco bay area since lots have the quake zone trait, “sequoia” implies that biome, and the map has a big bridge on it.

neighborhoods

anchorpoint wharf: downtown area. two residential lots, including an empty 30x20, one library, and one rental.

gilbert gardens: family recreation spot. three residential lots, including an empty 40x20, and one recreation center.

hopewell hills: more suburban. four residential lots, including an empty 30x20.

upsides

family space with a lot of options to build and annoy/clone neighbors, while not sacrificing a more urban feeling. plus, it’s the second most recent pack, which means it still feels fresh to a lot of people.

downsides

i’ll be honest, i thought san sequoia was a slam dunk when i was conceptualizing this post. but now that i’ve gone through all the other worlds, i think it’s honestly too young for the howlters. dalien is not splash pad age, for sure. i think it’s still a solid contender, but i would be a bit surprised if it gets picked.

tier ranking

Possible

Chestnut Ridge

horse ranch’s shiny new western US desert world! i’d say the red rock and hills makes i more utahish versus the southern california (oasis springs) and maybe arizona (strangerville) deserts. can i get one brushy high-desert landscape, please? anyway.

neighborhoods

galloping gulch: hilly living. two residential lots and one rental.

new appaloosa: downtown in yeehaw style. two residential lots, one nightclub, one bar, and a notable rabbit-hole arena for horse training next to the park.

riders’ glen: ranch and vineyard spaces. five residential lots with one empty 64x64.

tier ranking

let’s just jump to it: unless dan and phil get a hankering for dil and tabitha to ride horses or crush grapes, i suspect chestnut ridge will only possibly be a destination for dab and evan as brokeback mountain jokes. “For the bit” with an asterisk, it is!

Top contenders

Copperdale, Evergreen Harbor, Britechester*

Possible

Windenburg, San Sequoia, Oasis Springs, Brindleton Bay

For the bit

Mt. Komorebi, San Myshuno, Strangerville, Chestnut Ridge*

nah

Del Sol Valley, Sulani, Tartosa, Henford-on-Bagley, Newcrest, Glimmerbrook, Moonwood Mill, Forgotten Hollow, Magnolia Promenade * = not right away

#finally got this 4k+ monster ready to go #thanks to dnp for not posting spooky week today and giving me a lull lol #this is all my opinions: i'd love to hear other sim players' thoughts!#will they prove me wrong and move the howlters to sulani? lol #i'm excited to find out #my ramblings #sims #dapg

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wildernezz · 1 month

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fine, I'll bite. Analyze me

okay i was not expecting this for a lot of reasons but i'm intrigued now so i'll bite back.

i usually do these analyzations on my other blog actually, @analyzing-people-like-hell, and i usually ask for a few characters just to make sure i'm going on the right track, but i think i can work with just skimming through your posts.

i doubt it's all that accurate because of the lack of information, but it's somethin', so hopefully it's at least entertaining to some extent:

toxic yaoi called they want their lawlight back.

you definitely kin either L or Light. i'm leaning towards L more just because of what you seem like, but i feel like you'd at least semi-relate to Light to some extent, and both can give a lot of insight. for one, you're definitely not a people person. the thought of engaging with most of the frivolous activities you see people do not only bores you, but it might even disgust you as well. or maybe you just lack the social skills to deal with people so you tend to avoid them all together. either way, it does make people keen on viewing you as more of an asshole type. you probably are a bit of an asshole, but your nature ensures that you get the job done, so it's not like anybody can complain.

i don't know what your parents did but i can just smell the parental issues from you. for whatever reason, you find them inadequate and maybe even failures of guardians. it's hard to pinpoint why you'd feel that way, but my guesses are that they were probably just negligent in general. they probably didn't treat you with respect, or just didn't treat you with any care in general. i can imagine they get needlessly pissy with you a lot and blame/push their problems onto you. who knows, either way they don't seem very nice, and they're maybe even a lot worse than what i'm assuming.

despite not being much of a people person, you seem pretty emotionally-intelligent. you spend so much time with yourself that it's easy for you to control your emotions and stay pretty level-headed in situations that would normally fracture others. it gives you an advantage when getting to know people. you understand yourself enough to keep yourself safe, but it also helps you understand where other people might be coming from. there was also this one reblog i found when skimming through your posts: "when you want to be heartless but you know that's not how you are" that does make me question a lot of my initial guesses. maybe you just want to appear like somebody who couldn't care less about what people think, but deep down you still do. you want to give the world the same kind of pain it dealt you, but you just can't. despite all the rage festering inside you, you can't seem to stop caring. (which honestly fucking relatable i can't blame you there man.)

also you're definitely emo. and somewhere on the gay agenda. there's definitely something you regret from 2020 specifically. idk what, but it's probably there.

that's all i can really think of right now. my bad if this is completely off, but it's the best i could come up with. i'd def be willing to try again given a list of characters if you wanted. i'm gonna go work on my spanish presentation now. adiós, you emo disaster. thank you for giving me more procrastination time.

#analysis #death note

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gncrezan · 5 months

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i'm obsessed with aki, like it's not even funny. I JUST NEED MORE OF HIM IN MY LIFE LAWD HAVE MERCY. would you happen to have a bit more information on the loml...? if not it's aight big love <33

YOU CAN ALWAYS ASK ME ABOUT HIM i'm so sorry it took so long to reply i have been so everywhere but i have been meaning to find like sketches and stuff i have around of him :)

collated a bunch of old sketches of his family!! aki was originally going to be a part of a big like. chinese-zodiac inspired thing and his family in particular were the snakes (he's got the character in his last name lol) and him and his siblings all got snake characteristics . there is however nothing new under the sun and even though i thought this was cool my friend was like "oh like fruits basket" and i shelved the idea LOL

in the end he just existed in a vaccum, i had nothing to do with him, before i dragged him out of there with the intention to drop him into a simpler slice-of-life story with a bunch of terrible postgrad students. that story mainly revolves around like.. biomed researchers basically?? aki would have been an ex-STEM student who dropped out because he didn't want to do medicine anymore, but kept in touch with his friends from the course (the other cast might eventually also be forced into IFs LOL)

more under the cut!

i eventually completely veered off the zodiac-course and kept his base design and turned those scales into tattoos! he's got more in infamous, but in this universe it's just those snakes winding around his arms!!!! infamous tattoos are kind of not set in stone cause i plan to add more (inspired by the bandmates) and the tattoos are supposed to be based off them!! there was no way he'd stop at just seven's initials, he has a little thing for all of them!!!! bc we're only really two chapters into infamous tho i just want more time to "know" the bandmates and then give more him more tats (i have been reading asks about them and trying to assign stuff LMFMFMFAOOO)

what he has and i consistently draw him w are seven's initials, the snakes (leftover design from the kind of concept he was based off of), lotuses/flowers (could change!! i'm thinking rn that he gets everyone's favorite flower/plant tattooed), wave designs (i'm praying someone's a water sign), and he's also got the opening notes of their first song that they played as a band :)

the original version of him is also based vaguely off a friend i made in uni who did hair/makeup and which i still think is so cool and gave him that !!!! more specifically he sort of dropped out of a good-asian-kid stem course to do this, which freaked his parents out when they realised he was just Leaving to go cut people's hair. aki's pretty great at it, and is lucky enough to work at a good stylist agency <3

kills it at karaoke with his friends in this universe too :) his genuine passion for working as a stylist and love for his job translates into music for infamous, which despite how "i'm-so-cool-and-chill-about-everything" he tries to seem, is his biggest worry. he really really wants to succeed and stick it to his parents, and can't imagine what else he'd ever do. music is all he has and really gets lost in songwriting/singing :)

his stage name akiya is also a reference to the word for abandoned/empty houses in rural areas in japan. they're cheap to buy, but cost a lot to repair and flip. this is a stealth dig at his parents lol but aki passes it off as a portmanteau of his first/last name: he is secretly emo like this </3

also their band name, snakebites, in general is like 1) "what's cool when we are 16 and making this band when we are in high school" and 2) the band's shared birth year being the year of the snake (2001/i'm projecting) (they're still like 25/26 which makes infamous oddly take place in the future for me, 2027ish???) and luckily i don't believe the year it takes place matters to anyone so i'm just going with it <3 don't think about it too hard this is deep lore that only makes sense to me

their fandom name also call themselves snakes, and they lean into this for their promo materials (each member gets a government assigned snake breed) LMFAO !! aki lightly thinks its cringe but it's not hurting anyone, so he just told maya that he thought the name was great LOLLLLL !!! they have a vaguely edgy image because of this (and because ya know. lots of drama surrounding seven leaving) even though they're much more an indie rock band (sounding more like hippo campus, yona yona weekenders, young the giant) with a reputation for being wholesome

there's also a fun game their fans like to play called "using aki's hair, what era of snakebites is this" LOL <3

i hope this was kind of understandable <3 thank you for letting me cry about my boy <3

#this is like. so much random facts and stuff BUT I HOPE ITS OK!!!!#i plan to develop him more WITH infamous lol #lots of preexisting bland ocs get thrown into the IF rodeo to get cooler so again some of this might be subject to change LOOLLLL #thank u for the ask again :) <3 #akihiro yasumi #my art

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thekeeperof-thefandoms · 14 days

Text

Fine. I need mutuals to lose my sanity with so I give you my Hazbin Hotel hcs based off my OCs.

Please I am so fucking abnormal about my OCs and would love to elaborate on them any time!!! Please if you want specifics about their interactions with their respective partner or character sheets (I cant draw vivzie style good and I have some generic AI art of them I refuse to post it because I don't believe in using ai art for anything other than private use. I paid money for the one that's my profile pic cuz its my dnd character.)

Vox with a big tiddy goth girlfriend reader. Short, chubby, v insecure. Also feral adhd gremlin who copes with dark humor. Makes Vox's ADHD worse. They give each other vocal stims. Call and response echolalia. Vox is constantly assaulted by memes now. Honesly they bring out the inner goblin in each other but it's fine cuz it helps Vox unwind and emotionally regulate finally. She's bi too so anytime Vox (who canonically is more into men) finds a guy he likes they can totally bring him in for a threesome. She leans towards women so it goes both ways. She's a sub for women but tops for men (especially Vox's bratty ass).

Alastor with a skinny non binary autistic person. People mistake them for a twink. Some days they're more fem cuz they want to be pretty. Usually anxious, quiet, enjoys reading and listening to Alastor's music or radio static. Then you get them to unmask and they're a barely stable perpetually exhausted creature thriving off of caffeine and memes. Alastor adores their chaos and listening to them ramble. Appreciates they try to find modern culture he'd relate to and enjoy. They spend time co-existing to bond, doing their own thing next to each other. No pressure to initiate intimacy or anything other than friendship. Autistic person gets a lot of Alastor's sensory ick (esp about touch) without being nosy and just accepts their murder gremlin radio friend. (Accidental platonic partners).

Valentino getting a fucking therapist (he needs one. I see the bi-polar theory and as some one who worked with bipolar people I can see it but he could just be a terrible person). That therapist having two main personalities after death (based on a book a read where a person's ghost was split into two people from before and after their trauma). Both are qualified therapists. One's a 2000s emo boy who's esthetic is Laughing Jack. Except plot twist they're from the south (based on a kid I knew in high school). Puts Vox in his place more often than not by just tying him up and whisking him away to have his tantrums in private (they probably [definitely] fucked.) Tough love kinda but in a way that actuall forces Valentino to confront his issues and deal with it. The other is basically if Harley Quinn got a Homestuck Trickster design. Very sweet. Very blunt. Chaos incarnate. Elaborately finds ways to put Valentino in situations that make him uncomfortable so he has to deal with them and then pavloving him with candy or sex when he's a good person. They're both helping in their own way because now Valentino has to think about his actions, emotionally regulate, and is rewarded for good behavior. The whole dynamic is cute and sexy but also kinda twisted.

Plot twist, Alastor's accidental QPR, Vox's chaos thicc witch, and the unhinged therapy duo are all besties from when they were alive and it means Vox and Alastor have to be civil to each other cuz their partners are friends and they don't wanna upset them.

Bonus points cuz they make friends with Angel and Angel gets to watch two candy themed clowns walk his boss's ass like a dog.

Lucifer gets the AUDHD diagnosis he didn't know he needed ("oh, that's what's wrong with me"), lots of comfort and validation, and a healthy dose of therapy as well.

#hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel vox #hazbin hotel alastor #hazbin hotel lucifer #hazbin hotel oc #hazbin hotel valentino #vox x reader #valentino x reader #alastor x reader

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comicaurora · 2 years

Note

If you don’t mind, what are some of the other characters form the urban fantasy thing? This seems really interesting!

Hoo boy, aside from the stock characters I by law must include (the entire cast of A Midsummer Night's Dream, etc) there's a bunch, of which this is a few-

Nadia, wielder of Nuada's silver hand and his Claíomh Solais. Very slowly singlehandedly repelling an invasion of Fomoire from the sea, where they were banished by the Tuatha Dé Danann millennia ago. While Nuada is only dead, the other Tuatha have completely faded away and can no longer affect the real world, and Nuada's silver hand is his only physical anchor to reality. Nadia, for her part, lost her arm in a car wreck as a child caused by something that was definitely not a deer, and this sudden traumatic induction into the knowledge that there is a reality beyond her own caused her to be more than willing to play host to an ancient dead god if it meant she could fight back. Technically one of the world's most powerful sorcerers, but since she's using ancient divine magic it's considered a bit of a cheat by other wizards.

Leda, a former "swan bride" who was trapped in human form by a wizard whose ass she subsequently kicked. Runs a shelter that's broadly for anyone who needs it but fills the specific niche of helping out Secret Worlders who need support or a place to stay. The most well-established Secret Worlder in the "real world" since she needs to do stuff like rent a location and pay taxes. Has no magic abilities but a lot of social connections and doesn't seem to age.

Logan Lee, one of the oldest vampires in the world. Died in the Goryeo-Khitan War in 1009. Looks like he's in his late teens, which is young enough that certain real-world things are inconvenient for him. Discovered several centuries back that the energizing properties of coffee can keep him going without needing blood as long as he drinks a lot of it, so obviously his only recourse was to smuggle coffee beans out of Arabia and jumpstart the entire global coffee trade. Works as the man-behind-the-man-behind-the-man running the global coffee corporation this grew into, and works his day job as an innocuous low-level barista in the same chain. Bankrolls a lot of secret world stuff that otherwise would never be able to break even. A bit detached from reality, but tends to show up whenever things are getting complicated, because he sort of collects interesting heroic people and the experience of going on adventures with them.

Erik. His father is a selkie, his mother was a marine biologist and lighthouse-keeper, it's a tale as old as time. They've recently and abruptly moved inland from the coast and Erik kind of hates having to adjust to a less-coastal life, and he knows his dad is also uncomfortable having to suddenly live in human form almost full-time, but neither of his parents are willing to tell him about all the monsters that have started coming up out of the ocean. He's going through a bit of an emo phase.

Aila, descendant of Tam Lin. Everyone in her family line is marked by a streak of silver hair, reflecting that Tam Lin's hair became colorless during his time in the fairy realm. Aila is the first descendant born with her hair entirely white, and she's since dyed it an innocuous brown and buried herself in oversized green sweatshirts and antique cast-iron jewelry to stave off attention from her "fairy godmother", who has been trying to re-abduct Tam Lin's descendants ever since Janet "stole" him away from her. Aila is accompanied by an emotional support dog, Lucille, that is very good at identifying things human eyes can't see. Her parents are very mild-mannered and absolute experts at warding off fey.

Jonah, a werewolf. His extended family is enormous, wealthy and structured like an actual wolf pack - as in, run by a couple generations of extremely organized parents and alarmingly willing to adopt everybody. Looks like a classic good-hearted golden retriever jock, and basically is. Very clicked in with the "real world" but from a rather sheltered and privileged angle, and the most likely of the cast to indulge in casual superheroics. Has needed "emergency pants" on several occasions.

Aden, an incubus from a Mesopotamian dream realm who decided he wasn't into any of that stuff and left for the real world to live a Normal And Totally Chill Life. Not a demon in any meaningful sense and not susceptible to any traditional methods of exorcism, but he is preternaturally attractive and sets off the alarm bells of any wizardy people around. Unconvincingly attempts to pass for a completely normal person who knows absolutely nothing about any secret worlds. He's kinda like if Helen of Troy went into witness protection. Jonah's roommate.

Serena, a young witch who lives in a beautiful extradimensional island with her moms Morgan and Hildr. The pocket dimension may or may not be Avalon. Very sheltered in her own way, with a touch of the Erin-like hubris, eg "I know everything that matters and everything else is irrelevant." Uninterested in reshaping reality but curious about life on earth, as both her moms decided they weren't interested in staying there a very long time ago. Has a tendency to sneak out. Specializes in a form of magic that involves summoning the spirits of constellations.

Bruno, Serena's cousin. A completely normal human with absolutely no powers. The only weird thing about him is his mother is Gunnr, a valkyrie shieldmaiden with a big spear and a flying wolf. She isn't home very often. When Serena sneaks into the real world, Bruno is the one who shows her around and explains the lay of the land. He knows a lot about the secret world but doesn't really think this is much of a big deal and mostly minds his business.

#asks #not aurora #urban fantasy thing

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cogaytes · 1 year

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i saw the woobification thing! although i havent interacted with the fandom long enough to get a concrete feeling of how far it goes with, well most of the characters, but tam and linh specifically. curious what u think abt it and if u could clear it up a bit!

the best comparison i can think of is low key the way white people in the kpop fandom tend to talk about the idols? where there's this weird idealization of them as soft and sensitive but refusing to show that part of themselves because they're too dark and mysterious and bad and whatever. but a lot of the time they do that in a kind of feminizing way which plays into that stereotype of asian men not being masculine; for instance, i've seen people in both fandoms post about how tam/an idol "still enjoys feminine things like makeup." obviously i am in favor of breaking down the gender binary around activities, but when you're headcanoning just tam as someone who acts less masculine and not doing the same for other characters like fitz or dex it gets kind of weird! i also see him headcanoned as short a lot, but in a "uwu small angry cinnamon roll pouty face" way that kind of woobifies him? and i guess in general the parallels just rub me the wrong way a little because they remind me very much of the low key fetishization of kpop idols (how they get written as shy and uwu and sensitive and emo).

there's also a huge tendency to headcanon tam as mlm/transmasc (which inherently isn't bad! i'm queer and nonbinary and i love headcanoning characters as queer and nonbinary too! but i feel kind of weird about how tam gets so consistently headcanoned as gay and trans), which also happens a lot in kpop fandoms. and again, nothing wrong with trans/queer headcanons or even trans/queer headcanons of asians folks specifically, but i think there's kind of a pattern of people immediately deciding asian men have "lgbtq vibes" and it's got some funky implications.

i guess i'm saying people need to think very hard about what about asian men makes them want to hc them as trans/queer and what that says about how they think about asian/lgbtq men. because asian men tend to be seen as less masculine/more feminine and softer than white men, and it kind of feels like people headcanon them as trans/queer because there's an association of softness/femininity with queer men and with trans men. which is also playing into a shitty transphobic/homophobic stereotype as well as a racist one. folks also tend to feminize him more when shipping him with other male characters, which kind of implies that there needs to be a masculine and feminine man in mlm relationships.

just gonna close off by quoting some stuff i've seen in posts, not to call anyone out specifically, but to demonstrate how pervasive an issue i feel it is:

"loner energy" "dramatic emo" "skater grunge aesthetic" "my chemical romance"

"tam is the moodiest...person ever"

"his shove his feelings in a bottle mentality is showing"

"he keeps his curiosity under lock and key hidden underneath his prickly attitude"

"his s/o's parents probably wouldn't like him [at first] because of his exterior, but love him once they realize he's really just a lovesick puppy for his s/o"

"is never turned off by feminine activities"

"tam and dex both scream gay to me. like they are either gay or aroace because i just can't see them liking women"

#again--not trying to go after anyone whose posts i quoted #just think it's a good idea for folks to examine where some of these headcanons are coming from #and whether they could be rooted in stereotypes #kotlc critical #tam song #mine

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stars-and-blackholes · 9 months

Text

SO MUCH FOR STARDUST (THE TRACK) IS ABOUT MANIA [ANALYSIS]

LYRICS

“I'm in a winter mood, dreaming of spring now”: Winter as a reflection of how negative and cold Pete feels (towards himself and the industry) as a result of the reception of MANIA. He’s dreaming of a better time where he can start anew (spring as a symbol for birth/new things) away from all of the negativity MANIA generated from its poor reception. MANIA came out during Winter. So Much (for) Stardust came out during Spring.

“I'm burning myself down”: Shows how Pete felt like he had to start over after MANIA and can explain why SMFS sounds so different from MANIA. He didn’t want to make the same ‘mistakes’ (we love MANIA here this is from his POV). Can also represent his negative self talk as a result of the album flopping because he gets his worth from external validation (will he touched on in later lyrics)

“I feel like something bad has stretched out over and over again// Until I'm creased and I'm about to break down the middle// Split me right down the middle, right, right down the middle, yeah”: Here Pete reflects on the damage that has been done to him. He feels drained after having to call on his negative emotions to make art as many times as he has (over and over referring to the repetitive nature of this) and it's so bad to the point he feels like he’s going to break. He’s tired of having to write about negative stuff and so when he was creating MANIA, he was excited that a lot of the songs weren’t as serious and more fun. He was probably crushed when they weren’t received well because 1) vulnerable because he was trying something new and was already insecure 2) felt like once again he had to be like “old FOB” to be liked which has been a constant struggle of the band 3) was excited to put out an album that wasn’t so negative that wouldn’t drain him as much since he didn’t have to call on so many negative emotions to create the album “Right down the middle'' can also signify how there are two parts of him: one part of him who wants to make authentic art that’s whatever he’s feeling at the time which isn’t as angsty anymore because he’s better now and another part who wants to go with what’s popular (which is his angsty stuff) because he’s dependent on external validation. He feels pulled in two opposing directions. In general these lyrics speak on the toll his art has taken on him and can represent pre versus post hiatus which is another debate within the fanbase often about which is better.

“The stars are the same as ever”: referring to how the industry (despite changing) generally stays the same which is added pressure for FOB to not change their sound. Which I think makes sense because with FOB specifically, there’s been ongoing talk for ages about how people want them to remain the same.

“I don't have the guts to keep it together”: Pete being vulnerable and admitting the negative backlash has affected him more than he lets on. I think a lot of artists try to put on a facade like they don’t care about negative reviews, but at the end of the day it sucks when people don’t like your work. Could also refer to how sometimes he wants to resort to OG Fall Out Boy because he ‘doesn’t have the guts’ to try anything experimental again like MANIA after how it was received

“Stuck in the permafrost”: Pete feeling like he’s not allowed to change. Like he has to maintain this image of a sad emo guy forever because that’s what he was known for and that’s what essentially got him popular.

“Life is just a game, maybe// I'm stuck in a lonely loop, my baby”: Life to him in the music industry at times feels like a game to maintain popularity while also keeping authentic to himself. It feels like he’s in this loop of oscillating between those two options, while also in general feeling lonely because of MANIA’s reception. He feels like the industry that at one time loved him, rejected him during MANIA which leads to him feeling lonely

“We thought we had it all, thought we had it all”: Pete’s confidence that MANIA would be received well because of how well their other albums had been received. He thought they had it all and MANIA doing as poorly as it did shattered that illusion and threw Pete into a spiral. He didn’t want to make another album where that happened and his confidence around being able to succeed is shaken and explains why SMFS (the album) has a lot of moments of anxiety. The repetition of the phrase “thought we had it all” reflects this mental spiral. The general tone of this song sounds desperate/dramatic as well which reflects Pete’s state of feeling caught off guard, panicked, and hurt

“I need the sound of crowds or I can't fall asleep at night”: Pete's reflection on the effects of fame. He feels like he needs that validation to be at ease because he's dependent on external validation as many creatives are. It shows how he was affected by the poor reception of MANIA. Led to sleepless nights and him wanting to do better to win people back over. He needs that external validation even though he’s tried to convince himself he doesn’t

“I can't take my thoughts and I// Can't take my thoughts and I am awake”: Since he didn’t get that praise for MANIA, there are no crowds and therefore can’t fall asleep. Part of the reason he likes the crowds/praise is that it drowns out the voices in his head that say he’s a failure and that his work sucks. His negative thoughts are too overwhelming. In a way this song is almost meta because he’s using his pain that came from the poor reception of MANIA to write about how using his pain over and over in his work has damaged him and put him into a box, perhaps as an effort to break out of that cycle

“Another year of possibilities left unwrapped// Like it's the day right after Christmas past”: Possibilities to start anew after MANIA, in a way a callback to the spring line. It also calls back to FUTCT (line in Our Lawyer that says “the ribbon on my wrist says do not open before christmas”). Significant because FUTCT is often considered the best/peak FOB by a lot of people. A lot of people have said that So Much (for) Stardust sounds “the most like old FOB” so this line could be confirmation by Pete that they did try to return to their old sound for this album (which he knows will be more popular than MANIA). It can also explain the concept of 8 balls and why we’re getting the deepest cuts we have more so than past tours. They know that is what the fans want and will assure the return of crowds/popularity. It’s a way of rewarding the fans that stuck around despite the poor reception of MANIA. These 8 balls are for us. Pete was probably worried that with how negative people thought of the album, they would potentially lose their diehards too. But we stayed. Also wanna add that the backlash of MANIA probably reminds him of the reception of Folie which scared him even more when MANIA was getting shit on. Going through it twice is painful. I think choosing Folie songs for 8 balls shows them as a band reclaiming their history. Playing Folie songs as the crowd screams and cheers loudly is a way for them to reclaim their history where in the past they would get booed for doing Folie and so they didn’t want to play anything from that. The 8 balls show how far they’ve come!!! As people have said So much for tourdust in many ways is their healing tour)

“And I'm pretty positive my pain isn't cool enough, pain isn't cool enough”: Pete feeling like his pain isn't seen as cool enough anymore because he’s written about it so many times (can be a callback to Get Busy aka another reference to the old music with the opening line of “this has been said so many times that i'm not sure if it matters” and also a callback to shipped gold standard with the line “before it all becomes the same old song”). In general, FOB’s music has this recurring idea of Pete rehashing negative emotions to the point of wallowing which makes sense in the genre of emo. It could very well be a critique of the entire genre itself that becomes even more potent when he’s much older. Also can speak on the idea of how in the industry, you have to seem shiny and new so people don’t get bored while also not changing because people hate when artists change (once again tying into the paradox from earlier)

“Like a sledgehammer to a disco ball// Crushing all my low, low, low, low, ache it 'til you make it// Ache it 'til you make it”: Reinventing himself with SMFS. ‘Low low low’ refers to the poor reception of MANIA or the idea of him being a disco ball and the music industry/audience being the sledgehammer that crushed him and broke him. “Ache it till you make it” (a play on the popular phrase) speaks on Pete's experience of how he's used a lot of his misery in song writing and that's how he made it in the industry

“I think I've been going through it// And I've been putting your name to it”: Pete going through it as a result of the poor album reception and blaming the music industry and those who didn’t receive the album well. Pete feels betrayed which once again reflects in the hurt tone of the song

“In another life you were my babe// In another life you were the sunshine of my lifetime”: Pete reflecting on what MANIA could’ve been if it had been received better/released at another time (can directly link to MANIA because one of the tracks of MANIA is Sunshine Riptide)

“What would trade the pain for? I'm not sure”: Pete contemplating the price of fame and being unsure if fame is worth sacrificing his authenticity as an artist as well as having to use his vulnerabilities and painful emotions in order to succeed. Would he trade the pain of his emotions to maintain relevance? He’s not sure. Bit of a lose-lose situation

“I used to be a real go-getter// I used to think it'd all get better”: how Pete thought being dependent on external validation as well as doubtful of his capabilities as a lyricist would subside over time but realizing that no matter what, that doubt doesn’t go away. Imposter syndrome made worse by the poor reception of MANIA sent him into a spiral which is reflected in this song. Alludes to how Pete thought he could change throughout his career but he is now pigeonholed and can't express how he wants to. Because he wasn't always famous, he used to be more optimistic before fame became an aggressive cycle and he became more jaded, especially once he experienced the rejection of MANIA.

At the end of the song, there is a crowd saying “So much for stardust// We thought we had it all, thought we had it all” lyrics along with Patrick. This signifies that as a result of SMFS (the album), Pete is predicting that since they returned to something more reminiscent of their older sound, they will have won people back over (which is true… a lot of comments towards SMFS are gleeful about how happy they are that ‘old FOB is back’). The crowd goes until the sound fades, which shows that Pete is able to fall asleep again. The silence and the track ending represents him finally asleep. The thoughts are silenced. The external validation is back. But was it worth it? Was it worth the pain? Overall, this song is reflective and existential about Pete’s experience in Fall Out Boy and his creative process and the toll it's taken. Listening to this song on repeat reflects the loop line of the song and reflects the repetitive issue at the core of Fall Out Boy’s career. Over the course of their career, the issue of Fall Out Boy and their sound has been a prominent one. They’ve had to fight for their right to grow and change as a band. SMFS (the track) shows the aggressive cycle of fame/creation and how oftentimes creatives are chewed up and spit out by the same industry they give their life and livelihood to. They’re frequently caught in dilemmas of wanting to be popular while also wanting to stay true to themselves. Sometimes those two goals align, but other times they don’t and one must choose. This song is Pete’s answer to the question.

#who wants some good fucking food #fall out boy #fob #analysis #song analysis #fob analysis #mania #so much for stardust #this took me two hours #basically I had a rudimentary analysis for this song when I first heard #where I came to the conclusion it was about mania #and tonight I analyzed it from that lens

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tamaruaart · 3 months

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YOU

Grant us your oc’s delicious lore, anything that comes to mind first-

Ah tysm for asking

(btw I apologize for this being long af 😔)

So I feel like I should prep this by saying before I figured out about LMK I was super into OPS's jttw series. So I made Zhao with the context of the book, and the book doesn't sugar coat things so Zhao's backstory is a bit uhhh, mature? There's no nsfw stuff but there is a lot, lot, loottt of angst (even though the backstory is kinda "simple"), so forgive me :'(

I did change up her backstory a bit for the LMK version because it is a kids show and I don't feel like the creators would stick with the dark tone of the original. Whenever I write OCs for sertant shows I try to write it with the context of "How would the creator tackle this if my oc was a Canon character?" Yk? You don't write a depressed, emo, Greek hero for a light hearted magical girl show.

So ye, this first segment will be her JTTW backstory sum-up and I'll note what is changed in the LMK version at the end👍

JTTW/original backstory(this is long, read at your own risk)-

-Zhao wasn't raised in the best household.. Not only was her father a total womanizer with 3 wives (at the time of her birth, by now he has 7) and who knows how many mistresses, but her elder family member were pretty verbally abusive. I mentioned before but Xiaotian and Biao-Qi (Zhao's father and grandfather) wanted Zhao to be born as a male because in their clan its essential for the first born of every generation to be a boy, so when they found out about Zhao being a girl they were really salty and thought of her as "The disgrace" of the family. (hence why Zhaoyan is a name generally given to Chinese boys, which yea Xiaotian is the type of douche-bag to chose the name of the child at the start of his marriage without the mothers approval)

-Zhao was the one basically raising her younger siblings because her parents couldn't be bothered to, Pangfua (Zhao's mom) couldn't even bare to look at Xiaotian's face so the last thing she cared for was some random children of him and his mistresses, and Xiaotian's other wifes didn't really care for the children either. However, Zhao ADORED her siblings because she was always good with little kids. But as time went on and on, with so many children coming in to the household she started getting tired, but what could she do? At the time she was barely a teenage girl, if she complained to her father she could legitimately be at risk to lose her head. Like I said, Xiaotian couldn't care less about Zhao, he doesn't give a damn if she likes taking care of her siblings or not.

-Eventually Zhao grew too tired of her family, and decided to leave. This might seem selfish but holy frick, the girlie felt like a maid, and it's not like she doesn't care for her family, it's that they couldn't care less about her. All of her siblings were old enough to take care of each other and the other family members treated them well, why shouldn't she be able to "go live her own life"?

- The first place she went was to a temple dedicated to the Chinese tiger spirit- Hu Ye. The reason she went to him specifically was because he was sort of the protector/symbol of Zhao's family (for context think about how Apollo was the protector of the Trojans in the Iliad), she prayed to him all night, she asked humbly to become a Jade Maiden that serves Guan Yin (because that was probably the best option. Also just so you have context- Hu Ye blessed the girls in Zhao's family with a healing gift. So basically they could heal any illness, wound, missing limb etc...). But to her surprise Hu Ye saw what she did as "unforgiving". You shouldn't leave your family who loves you so much, not cool >:( (cut him some slack tho, whenever to family would worship him they would make them self's seem like the most perfect people ever). And so in short he gave her flaming orange hair so she never forgets that she is a Tiger Maiden (bcz orange=tigers and he just be petty like that bro).

-Eventually she went to the woods but she was found by Lánhūa- a forest spirit. Lánhūa took pity on her and decided to take her in as one of her nymphs. Because Zhao had the healing gift she was a great addition to the palace Lánhūa lived in, Zhao was always the one making sure everyone was healthy and the worst someone suffered was a common cold, and even those wouldn't last long.

-However one day while she was collecting fruits for the palace she stumbled upon a strange noise near a mountain, she went to check what it was and wouldn't you have guessed its good ol' Sun Wukong. The pair fairly quickly became friends, Zhao would often tell him stories and keep him company and Sun (who was under that damn mountain for 346 years by the time he and Zhao met) would listen and tell her his life stories.

-At the early stages of the jttw Monkey actually did try and convince Zhao to come with him and the other pilgrims, she would be the one taking care of Tripitaka and making sure he stays healthy. Zhao refused at first but after some time she agreed. Her and Tripitaka were very close because they were both kinda the "sane ones" of the group and Zhao took her position very seriously. Sanzang eventually noticed that this was a bit weird considering how layed back the other pilgrims were, so he confronted her and Zhao opened up to him. And that's how I'd show her backstory in the book.

So in short: Girl leaves abusive family and prays to god, god makes her a ginger and she gets adopted by a hot forest spirit. A monkey befriends her and convinces her to give free health care to his friend **emotional**

Holy crap that took so long to write/ Notes on how her backstory would probably be changed in the lmk version:

In the lmk version I think they'd tone down how bad her family was just a bit, again it is a kids show. I think the start would generally be the same but that Hu Ye would grant her wish. But instead of a disciple for Guan Yin I think they'd change it into a Peach Maiden, so that she could meet the brotherhood and befriend Wukong like she did in the original backstory. They'd probably remove Lánhūa as well (because she is a very minor character in Zhao's backstory). So yea in short of what I think the creators of LMK would do with her character: -Hu Ye grants her wish of becoming a Peach Maiden. -Orange would be her natural hair color(bcz tigers woo). -I honestly think they'd give her a sort-of survivor's guilt because of the whole "leaving your family" thing instead of "Ama give u tiger hair so you never forget how you left your family >:(" -She meets the brotherhood through their lil' rebellion -Healing powers would probably be toned down a bit so there's still some risk

So ya-

Again thank you SO much for the question and thank you for coming to my Ted talk

#monkie kid #lego monkie kid #lmk oc #jttw oc #lego monkie kid oc #monkie kid oc #journey to the west #oc lore #I'm sorry this is so long lol

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arcielee · 7 months

Text

Interview With a Writer

I know I usually do Ewanverse or HotD, but I fell in love with this story. Thank you @bhxrdy for indulging me and answering my questions. 💜 As always, Interview With a Writer is my ongoing series of the talented souls on Tumblr and ao3, and their brilliant writing!

Dividers by @saradika

Name: bhxrdy

Story: timeless

Paring: modern Finan x original female character

Warnings: Explicit/18+, be mindful of chapter warnings!

So, when did you start writing?

I started really writing, like 10 years ago now - right into 2013. I had discovered and gotten very into (I'm shy to say) k-pop, and at the time, social media was new to me. I had joined a couple of forums here and there, but really got into the thick of it once I joined Twitter and Tumblr. It was also then - for the 1st time - that I found out about fanfiction, which was an unfamiliar concept to me.

Its a bit blurry, but I remember I started reading a few stories here and there about my fave group at the time and - I don't remember the specifics but - I had eventually started coming up with wild scenarios, small ideas here and there, that I wanted to put down on paper.

Writing in general was relatively new to me (a few years before, when I was in high school, I was writing "poems" and other notes in a massive emo-like notebook - all because of a boy of course), so the idea of creating something substantial, like the fics I had read so far, was a bit terrifying but also kind of exciting because I stumbled on something brand new to me and was dying to be part of it along with some new online friends I had made (which I unfortunately lost touch with over the years).

Within the span of 2013-2015, I wrote 28 stories (on a 3rd party site) - a mix of one shots and multi-chaptered fics, which includes 2 unfinished stories - which were left to die by 2017-2018. I had finished school and started working, which totally changed my routine. The lack of interactions in the fandom didn't help either as by then, it was pretty much dying from the band's moving on and eventually disbanding. The stories are still there, my account is still there, as I don't have the heart to take it down. I've spent so much time on them, and loved every genre I wrote. I either went fluffly fluff or super angst and dark, all of them fun to write.

After that I moved away from the fandom as well and just the k-pop scene in general. I took a hiatus from writing altogether too - the will of it had died so I mostly focused on editing. And then, I started back again in 2020, wrote a couple of stuff on Tumblr (for the 1st time) until I stopped again a few months later. The inspiration stopped and I just couldn't bring myself to write anymore. So I moved away.

And then this year, TLK happened and I just had the inspiration back on the tip of my fingers, just swirling in my brain and was dying to write it down, so I gave it another shot and wrote my first Finan fanfic. It was very rusty getting back into it after so long but I'm glad I did because I got to meet amazing people which I'm grateful for.

I have a tendency of daydreaming a lot, I can easily get lost it my own head. Finding out I could actually just write them down, liberating everything I held up and see them face to face vs. just thinking about them, became a whole new ball game.

Where did the plot for timeless come from?

It hit me out of nowhere and happened when I was re-watching The Originals (TVD spin off). I'm not sure how, but it physically/literally stopped me in my tracks (mind you I wasn't doing anything special, just going to the kitchen to get a snack) as if I was hit on the head with it, like, "Yes! omg! shit! this is it!!"

I immediately picked up my phone and started typing random thoughts and notes down for the story. It was very rough, just generalized ideas of what could happen. Some of those ideas did change trajectory from where they started, but I'm hoping they were good changes and worth the story telling 😊

Watching The Originals helped with the inspiration. I knew Finan was always meant to be cursed, I just had to figure out the best way to present it. I also drew inspiration from other witch shows like Charmed, A Discovery of Witches, and BTVS. I love anything related to the supernatural and witchcraft, so it was fun coming up with the initial layout of the story.

At the beginning, I debated if it should be a one-shot or multi-chapter based on how much I had come up with. I was 99% sure I would stick with the one-shot, but eventually the 1% took over and I just went from there...the lines took a life of their own.

Explain your interpretation of Finan. What drives him? Why is he the way he is in timeless?

I was mostly trying to stay true to how his character was built on the show and transport that in writing within the concept of the story (I'm sure I've strayed, but hopefully that's alright).

When we first meet Finan, he's infiltrated modern day life as if he was part of that world, always. Then he meets a woman on a random night and everything changes for him.

Thinking of it this way, the man has been by himself for a thousand years - the life he knew, his family, his friends - everything from his past has disappeared and he is all alone, and so he was just at this point in his existence where he was done with everything, partly discouraged from being immortal, partly begrudgingly accepting of his fate as a man who will never die.

But then he meets Rebecca, a woman who has no inkling whatsoever of who Finan is, i.e. their meet up was random passing of time in the(ir) universe. Once they meet, his life alters. She was the light at the end of a tunnel, she was a beacon of hope. Meeting her, befriending her - he found purpose again. He was ready to fight again, to live like a normal man again.

Throughout the story, I tried to focus on this aspect specifically - on the basis that he is hopeful to become a free man again. And though, there is conflict within himself, to the point he was ready to give up again, I'd like to think that Rebecca was simply someone he needed in his life. Not because of what she could do for him, but because of who she was, as a character, as a person to him. She put her life on hold for him and in return, the universe gave them something that everyone wants - to love and be loved and not be so alone in the world.

Finan, having been alone for a century, found his drive through Rebecca - through her presence, always standing by his side and fighting for him. Them falling in love was an added bonus.

Do you feel Rebecca/Bex complement Finan in this?

I would like to think that she does, because she gave him a new spark into his life, allowing him to feel truly alive again - which was something he had been deprived off since his original lifetime (i.e. since the TLK era).

With Bex's stubbornness driving him insane at times, I think it also helped him on the hope aspect - she was willing to go to the ends of the earth for him, for someone she had just met all because she wanted to make things right, to help him (a stranger, when they met) find peace. She wasn't reluctant about it nor did he even ask for help (he was the apprehensive/suspicious one). And I believe, at the end of the day, it all came down to how they felt about each other from the night they met. They unintentionally nurtured a connection they created until it became so immense, they ended up wearing it naturally, like a second skin.

Not only was she his anchor to the world of the living, Bex had become the part of him that died a long time ago. This makes me believe - in a some kind of weird way - that she was his soulmate. That, despite the heaviness of the curse, Finan was meant to cross path with her, that the(ir) universe gave him a break in the form of a kind-hearted and stubborn as a mule witch. A woman who would end up gifting him a second chance, and the opportunity to experience the good aspect of life again (as well as love).

Where did the dreams and the curse lore come from?

The dreams part of the story was inspired by The Originals, as there is the concept of the “other side” where non-resting souls are (the cemetery/graveyard scene description was inspired by the one they have on the show) - so I leveraged it and made it so Bex was forced into contact with another witch while sleeping instead of through a spell (as she had no reason to contact the dead while awake).

For the curse, I knew what I wanted out of it as it was already part of the original draft when I first came up with this story idea. I knew where it was taking me and how I would want it built - the reasoning behind it though was a bit if the tough part which I had also integrated into the storyline with Bex losing her shit over it.

Any chance of a sequel? Or do have anything else you are working on next?

So, unfortunately no sequel. But it does not mean I haven't thought of an epilogue - or kind of. Just random scenes with Bex of what life is after the ending that randomly play out in my head. I don't think I'll want to write them mostly because I want to keep the ending as is.

I'm working through a few other stories at the moment. The priority ones are for Osferth (a one-chaptered drabble for your 1k celebration, and a multi-chaptered fic which will also tap into the supernatural concept), which I am hoping to get started - officially - very soon!

I have some others dangling as well, which should eventually come soon as well - this includes Finan, Sihtric and Aemond.

Do you have a personal favorite story you'd like to share?

There are so many to choose from! We Were Something, Don't You Think? by Maggie (@inthedayswhenlandswerefew), as well as Comet Donati and Have You No Idea That You’re In Deep?

Some other favorites include Wolf-Heart by @gemini-mama, Crimes of Passion by @itbmojojoejo, Sanctuary by @st-eve-barnes, and Winterwood by @lonnson

There is also a myriad of Finan x Aisling (OFC) fics by @persephones-journey which are heart-wrenching and good.

And Fire in Her Eyes by @emilyhufflepufftlk is another amazing one for Finan fans.

#interview with a writer #iwaw #iwaw18 #bts #of their brilliant writing #writing community

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hanarchy · 1 year

Text

Hi friends, I illegally logged into tumblr on my work computer on the first working day of 2023 specifically to make this post properly. I don't have a good computer and I simply could not do this on my phone.

Ok, Time to get emo :)

I discovered SKZ at the end of last year, I personally date my anniversary to somewhere between December 29th 2021 and January 2nd 2022. It's a good thing too because I get overemotional at the end of the year anyway and now I can just schedule all my gratitude and emo times at the same time.

I want to start from the beginning bc the only reason 2022 was a good year for me was this discovery. this is a bit of recap for me because I wanted to do it. If you're tagged in it it means that you played a part in my year and meant something to me. Feel free to only read your little paragraphs (or nothing at all, theres no obligation), this is bound to get unspeakably long.

first, I want to give a quick shout out to the people I started talking to/followed more recently @hyunpic (I haven's checked twitter today, did hyunjin kill you yet or did he get all of that out of the way in 2022?) @mybodyfails (did u ever listen to stromae?) @jisungsjaistandjeekies (how was the first day of your new job?) The best thing about getting another year on tumblr is the promise of getting to know you all more <3

@quokki you were literally the first person I ever followed for stray kids content. It was around february, when I looked for fanart for the first time and reactivated my twitter and I found your hannies. It took a little longer but I'm so glad we are friends now. I really love our chats/meltdowns abt hanji and you're incredibly talented and kind and also just correct abt a lot of stuff lmao

@alexenglish alex, I know we don't talk that much but you were the first person to really talk to me abt k-pop stuff and I will never forget that. I also cannot thank you enough for showing me rolling quartz and for reading the stupid thing that i wrote that one time. it seems trivial but i literally do not show anyone my writing ever and anytime I do and it's a good experience it makes me a little braver so thank you, seriously. and also thank you for sticking around even when I'm a dick

my first comeback in march was soso special because I had people to freak out with. I was in Ireland at the time and even hough I was brand new in online stayville I felt a lot less alone than I could've.

in april i started talking to @sailsflyseaward but I honestly can't believe it has only been 9 months. We've met 3! times since then and you're already one of my most precious online friends and I feel like I've known you way longer. I have to try very hard to stay cynical and not believe in fate and the universe being a good place when I think about how we could've just never met.

I was EXHAUSTED the first 4 months of this year, I hated most of it. I turned 30 in april, i had been to ireland and to the north sea on vacation in march and april but all of it felt hollow and exhausting and terrible. In germany we say that may makes everything anew and it certainly was true for me this year. I planned a trip to toronto, I got a raise, I got to see mamamoo, ive and a bunch of others live and i spoke a little to so so many sweet people.

@nevoono who makes literally the cutest fucking things ever and was my first german k-pop friend ever and also is just... really cool in such a unique way. idk I'm sorry I'm terrible at keeping up.

to @ambivartence who I don't talk to a ton but who also is literally the coolest artist alive and made me feel very happy to know that others also travel very far to see their groups. I stare at your paintings so much, i honestly should not admit it but there's just always so much to see.

and to @pvddins-art who is one of the sweetest and kindest and most generous people I've ever met, which is a high bar because I use those words for a lot of people, but for you they are more true than for anyone.

getting to go to a k-pop festival in germany as my first experience was so good too. I really had no idea what it means to ba a k-pop fan and the whole community and culture and incredible vibes around it when you're there in person. I had a very exhausting day and it was hot as hell and I had a migraine after but it was all worth it

interlude because I don't remember when I started talking to you:

@brianbangs tay my sweetheart, i love you so much. you're just one of the people who get it. like. idk, it's hard for me to put into words properly but you get it when I'm being a hater and you get it when I'm being emotional and you get it when I'm being horny and you accept all of it. I also think you're really fucking creative and talented and I love being here with you so much

then june came and it was one of my best months ever ever. I went to another festival and got to relive the music I loved as a teen. seeing the strokes 16 years after I was a fan made me cry a lot lol. I went to see my favorite people alive @starmotions, @fromadifferentphase (and the third one who is missing but u know who u are) in toronto. and I do mean this literally you're my favorites. I'm the most me when I'm with you, I think of everyone who knows me no one knows me so completely. there isn't anyone I share more parts of myself with. the 1 week I just got to hang out with you was so incredibly precious to me, it made me power through most of the rest of the year. moments of joy! I got to see toronto and got to spend time with people I love. one of my friends came all the way from salt lake city just to see me.

then I went to new york and now there's a long ass list coming because 1. it was the first time I met my beloved julia, 2. it was when i met my beloved kay 3. i got to travel with my beloved di and we got to explore new york and eat so many tacos and learn about queer art and history and also it was when I met both

@chanstopher and @lonelystreetlight and I'm puting you both in the same paragraph bc I started talking to both of you at the same time and also discovered that we're literally the same tumblr user, I cannot believe that I found the old 1D crowd again and the old glee crowd AND even the old starkid people. ok, I had to google the songs from the space tour just now but it's insane that I could text someone about both status quo by starkid AND zone by 3racha.

and lastly it was OF COURSE when i fucking saw fucking stray kids in fucking person (sorry) I was so numb from everything going on, and from the heat and from newark airport that I didn't even cry but looking back on it I honestly can't even begin to believe how lucky I was to be able to do all of that in just one month.

july was the month I went to see harry styles (meh) and hang out with an old friend because of it (yay) and I have literally nothing else in my calender for the entire month but I know I was a bit stressed. however I don't think it was a terrible time.

In august I went to the south of germany on vacation to celebrat my moms birthday, we went to the opera outdoors and I felt extremely fancy the entire time and also saw so many flowers. then we started the stayblr discord.

@snug-gyu @hanjesungs @ggthydrangea @littleclouds @shmalll @babychicklix and everyone else in there! I am so glad it's a space to hang out and message each other and talk about skz. I know I left very quickly (unfortunately group situations are terrible for my mental health and I felt very bad very quickly) but I still got to start chatting with so many cool people and I'm always so happy that we did that.

@bangchanies king of the dumpster that is new jersey, my absolute favorite eyeshadow model and another one of the bitches that just get it, u know? you just get what I'm trying to say and I am grateful to have you to text when I want to be annoying. (you're also secretly incredibly sweet and I think you're honestly just a very kind and empathetic person and i would be sadder without you but i will not tell anyone that you're secretly nice)

@cheekyquokka even though you're not IN the server, I feel like we started really talking around the same time so you're getting put in here as well. you're so generous and sweet to your friends, I remember the surprise and amazement from both bee and ale at the packages you sent them, you're such a great fucking mutual to have because you know yourself and you make really cool gifs, every time one of yours comes across my dash i know it. idek why. anyway, thank you <3

around september was when I finally started the group chat and seven made it complete, so here comes that bit. I needed to make sure you all know how much you mean to me.

@bourgeoix I swear in some off-kilter way we are soulmates. you make both my fandom brain and the little kid that didn't know popstars but could draw the shape of gorbachevs blood spot feel at home. you're soooo fucking smart and we have like debated moral philosophy and learning and reasoning styles at length so I won't go into it but it's one of those amazing fated coincidences that we both befriended seven and then each other. you think it's cool that I live near to Olaf Scholz's barbershop. you're my favorite of all the nerds. I could read the stuff you write for years and years and never get bored. I need to eat your brain (as jace or seven would say) and I love that we get to be both smart and very very very dumb together.

@hyumjim I honestly cannot top what mel said but you're like. my only grown up friend. You genuinely have a patience and kindness with people that is really hard to find. I know you don't show this to everyone but it makes me all the more grateful that I get to experience it. you're also insane. when seven first added you to the gc I had sth to say that felt really crazy to me and was nervous in front of you and seven said 'emily is also insane' and so i posted it in the gc and now we're friends. i don't remember what it was but you gave great advice and i sort of feel like we disagree and fight in all the ways that makes a relationship better and you make me insecure but in a fun way. you're a huge hater and yet you genuinely love people and humanity more than most people alive. thank you for listening to me.

@jellino jace idek how to describe you but you're like....... my little brother but not in a lame way. you're also older than me in some ways. idk, I just love how much you love stuff. I love how sure you are of what you're not, even while always wondering what you are. I think of you so much when I see sea creatures and ice age characters and dumb stuff. the other day I saw a squirrel irl and i thought 'I have to send this to jace' bc it reminded me of scrat from ice age. i cannot look at a penguin without thinking about you. I don't think I'll ever go to a zoo and not think of you. I also am always hoping that you are ok, that you find your way, that you know I'm happy and proud to know you...

@bewby my love. seven. I think it will never not be complicated how much I love you because I want you to be ok so bad. but it doesn't matter if you are or not for me to love you a whole lot. you're so funny and so smart and I say neither of these things lightly, like you have such a quick wit and you want everyone to be ok so bad and you love people so much and i hope that some day you will know that it is enough and you are enough. meeting you that one time was so fun, like we literally did not need more than a half hour to find sooo much stuff to talk about. I love having a german kpoppie friend, I love your tender heart, I love how understanding you are! I hope you know how much!

honestly it's all 4 of you that got me through fall and winter so far, it's venting and bitching and joking and writing insanely long messages to you that make me feel like a human instead of a gremlin. It's knowing that you like me and think I'm someone you want to listen to. You mean so much to me, I can never pay that back.

so much happened in my personal k-pop world in october PLUS most of my friends had their birthdays too so it was a bit stressful and it ended with my great uncle dying but i did get to see my old friends and family, so it was good in the end.

november was cold and dark as always but i got to feel so much warmth in scotland, just spending a few days going to museums and coffeeshops and nothing else and then seeing my love julia for the scond time, learning about history and eating pies. then I went to london to see @sunflowercocoa again after 5 fucking years and it was so much fun. I know you know how much I love you, I had such a good time, thank you for being my friend. Thank you for making me leave the house, thank you for being generous and fun and spending time with me. I know you're strong enough to get through the next year or so and I know you're gonna be so happy and so successful and you have a great life ahead. I know you're not here much anymore and that it kind of annoys you but you were a big part of this year and this is like my diary at this point tbh.

i also met @geniaparadox my homie and so much fun to hang out with. honestly our day together kind of made me wish i could've gotten to hang out with you in high school, i feel like we would have been friends. thank you for talking to me abt how underrated felix is and for looking at the bts stuff in hmv and despair because being a k-pop fan in europe is very sad and for buying japanese tea and just being cool. i am so happy that you get to not go back to that job

december was november but worse but I started it off sososo well, seeing julia the 3rd time and going to nuremberg and munich and being slightly tipsy at the christmas market everywhere and going swing dancing for the first time and trying so many fun food and drink things. It was a sad and anxiety-inducing month because so many people I know were ill or dying but in the end we mostly made it through and I am grateful. I got to spend the end of the year surrounded by babies and puppies and it felt good to not have to deal with grown-up things for a few days and just play.

#personal #life #middle of the day text posts #i love u all im so sorry for this

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