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#I don't even want to know how artists and writers must feel right now
peanutcrow · 20 days ago
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ah shucks, i really hope tumblr fixes its tagging issues soon. It's kind of a buzzkill when you work on something for some time and it just doesn't show up in the tags or disappears shortly after.
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sugarbooger513 · 9 months ago
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The Quiet Game (Gojo x fem!Reader)
This is my first time participating in a collaboration, and I'm super happy with how this turned out. Thank you @justahoeforhaikyuu for letting me participate!
This is my contribution for the Fuck Me Right Here event. You guys should check out the masterlist to see all of the other amazing writers/artists. Hope you enjoy!
Side note: thanks to @katgalle for proofreading and to @savonline for getting me into JJK. <3
Warnings: Semi public, fingering, dirty talk (wow the dirty talk), degradation, praise, gagging
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"This whole sha-bang just seems to be bringing everyone together as a family, don't ya think?" You hum in somewhat of an agreement as your goofy, white haired boyfriend continues to ramble. However, much like yourself, Nanami seem more occupied with the book in his hand rather than Gojo.
"Y/N, are you even listening to me?!" "Hmm? Of course I am dear." Gojo scrunches his nose slightly. "Okay, then what is the name of the novel I'm currently talking about writing?" What? Your blank stare makes him pout. "You weren't listening to me!"
"In all fairness," Nanami finally places his book on his desk, "you get rather annoying at times. I'm pretty sure if you write a book it will be full of pictures rather than words." "Nanami, you have to pander to the children to make money! Don't you know that, you wise old soul, you." The blonde groans in frustration and stands from his chair
"Whatever, Satoru. I'm going to grab some coffee. Would you like anything, Y/N?" "Oh, no thank you, Nanami." When he walks out, Gojo chuckles lightly.
"Now that he left, I'm bored."
"Satoru. dear, he's going to find a way to kill you one day." "I anxiously await it, my dear. Wanna play a game?"
You pick up the book you borrowed from Nanami earlier in the day with a smile. "Sorry, handsome, but I get bored of the 'name everything you like about Satoru Gojo' game." He mocks hurt on his handsome face. "How dare you get bored of someone as amazing as me? What is your problem, lady?"
He groans when you don't give him a response. Instead of sitting in his chair all bored like you were hoping, he decides to move it closer to you. Although his eyes are covered by that damn blindfold, you can see the mischief that practically beams from them. "What do you want, love?" "To play a game. Man, you must be deaf cause I already said that."
You already knew that there was no way you were getting out of this, so you lower the book from your face. "Okay, I give in. What game do you want to play?" You feel your heart sink into your stomach as his grin gets wider.
"How quiet can you be?" "D-do what?" "Oh, you heard me. How quiet can you be, Y/N?"
"S-Satoru, why are you asking?" His right hand starts to gently trail up and down your thigh, and he pretty much purrs seeing you squirm from such a miniscule thing. "This is play, is it not?"
You glance at the office door, which is shut (thankfully), and start to whimper. "Words, Y/N. I can't read your mind." "N-Nanami could come back at a-any moment. This is his office." Gojo's grin is downright evil.
"I'll make sure to finish you off long before he gets back, I promise. Now spread your legs a bit." You can't help but oblige the request. What could this hurt other than your own pride, honestly?
Gojo's free hand goes up and he pulls the blindfold from his face. "I want to make sure I don't miss a thing. I don't think I'll ever be able to convince you to do something like this again."
As much as you wanted to smack at him for that comment, there is something rather enticing about the idea that anyone could walk in looking for Nanami and instead see you and Gojo. What the two of you could be doing.. has yet to be decided.
His long fingers finally press to your panties, and he lets out a louder groan than you do. "Shit, I'm so glad you decided to wear a skirt today." "I-I wasn't expecting this, you know!" His icy stare meets your E/C eyes. "Aren't you supposed to be staying quiet? Also, I haven't even done anything to you yet, but I can feel how wet you are."
His middle finger runs up the entirety of your slit, making your breath hitch in your throat. He chuckles lowly as he watches your face scrunch slightly. "Oh, I see. You like being on display like this."
"E-excuse me?" All at once, his warm breath is on your ear. "Oh, you dirty slut. You're turned on from just the thought that someone could walk in on us, aren't you?" You can't bring yourself to answer, instead hoping that your flushed cheeks give him what he wants.
Sadly, Gojo isn't a man to settle.
"Answer me. Now." Goosebumps raise on nearly every inch of your skin from the sudden demand in his voice. "Y-yes, Satoru. You happy?" His free hand grips your chin before practically slamming his lips to yours. When his hand finally dips into your underwear, you can't help the squeak that you let out into his mouth.
He pulls back, smirking at the string of saliva connecting your lips. "What a good girl. You feel really good, you know." "S-Satoru.." He slowly dips his middle finger into your heat with a smirk.
"Just how I like you: soaked and begging for more. I wonder if the people in the office next door will hear your whimpers?" The thought alone sends a shock straight to your core.
"You want that? Man, if I knew my baby girl had such a dirty mind, I would have asked Nanami to leave us alone in his office months ago." His index finger presses into you, curling just enough to make you jump up slightly.
Gojo watches you, fascinated as your body becomes covered in a thin layer of sweat. "Damn it, I thought I could compose myself." "H-huh?" "Oh, just having thoughts of taking this a bit farther and fucking you stupid over blondie's desk. Man, that would piss him off."
When your moans start to get louder, Gojo shakes his head. "You need to be quiet. Ah! Open up." With a confused glance, you open your mouth. However, you were not expecting him to shove his blindfold in your mouth.
"Oh! I have a better idea than the desk." When his eyes turn to the large window on the other side of the room, your blood turns to ice. What the hell is he thinking?
"So many people would see you getting absolutely railed. The thought is enticing because I know that you belong to me and only me. Isn't that right, my dirty baby?" He smirks when he hears the strangled moans grow louder against the ball of cloth in your mouth. It's a really good thing he has multiple of those.
It just seems like that one in particular will have a new purpose.
The pumping of his fingers suddenly goes from a languid pace to damn near animalistic. You practically scream into his blindfold, certain that Nanami's coworkers are hearing this entire thing, but too fucked out to care.
"Maybe I should call Kento, have a nice chat with him while we do this. Would you like that? You want your best friend to hear how much of a slut you are for me?" Nanami would ream you for this. Afterwards he would beat the hell out of Gojo. This is not something you want him to ever find out about.
"I bet he's already on his way back. He just thinks I'm in here annoying the hell out of you about how loveable I am, but that isn't the case, is it? No, instead I'm in here spreading you out and making you cum with just my fingers." He hisses when he feels you tighten around his two fingers.
"I think you can handle a little more by now..." The third finger has your eyes watering. "Tears? My poor little angel, how dare I make something as precious as you cry? What's wrong, love?" Damn that smirk to hell.
When you whimper, he rolls his eyes. "I told you earlier that you have to use your words, silly." Your glare makes him chuckle. "Oh yeah, here."
The moment the cloth is out of your mouth, you grab his shirt and yank him into a kiss. He's quick to shove his tongue in your mouth. The moment he curls all three fingers, you let out a loud whine. "S-Satoru.. I-I'm.."
"Cum for me, love. Go ahead."
Those words have you tumbling over the edge instantly. The moan you let out rings in his ears as sinful, and he's positive someone heard it. Still, the dreamy look on your face as you ride out your high has him smiling.
He truly doesn't think he has ever seen you look more beautiful.
His fingers come out of you slowly, watching worriedly as you wince from it. "Are you okay, Y/N?" You nod, flopping your head on his shoulder. "Y-yeah. Damn, that was intense."
"Just you wait until we get home. I don't care how much you scream there." "S-Satoru Gojo!" He smirks, tapping your mouth with his index finger. "Open."
He sinks two of the fingers that were just inside you into your mouth with a sigh. "What a good girl. You always obey me so well." When your tongue swipes around them, you can see his body go rigid.
It's a blessing that you can tease him while looking so damn innocent.
He yanks his fingers from your mouth when he hears the door creaking open. However, that doesn't stop him from putting his ring finger in his own mouth to steal a taste.
"Sorry that took me so long, I got into a conversation with- Y/N! You're flushed! Do you have a fever?" Nanami, like the absolute angel he is, is quick to rush over and place the back of his hand on your warm cheek.
"N-no! I just- uhhh-" "Don't worry, Nanami," Gojo is quick to chime in, "she has been having hot flashes. It's almost that time of the month." When he finishes talking, he slips his blindfold back over his beautiful eyes. Nanami's cheeks dust with a tint of pink.
"Of course. Do I need to get you some medicine? Anything at all?" "No, Nanami. You're super sweet for worrying, though." He smiles and gives you the kindest pat on the head.
"Well," Gojo stands and holds his arm out for you, "we should be getting home now. I have some stuff to grade, and Y/N needs some rest." You nod and stand, lacing your arm through your boyfriend's. "See you later, Kento!" Nanami waves goodbye as you two walk out.
'Are her legs trembling?'
He was about to walk out to make sure that you were okay walking home, but then he sees it.
The chair you were in has a wet spot in it.
"So," you sigh as you and Gojo make it outside, "you think he knows?" "Nanami? No fucking way-"
"SATORU GOJO!!"
"On second thought, we should run!"
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vaveyard · 3 months ago
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In an old post you said you told your agent that you wanted to write the next big YA series
So not only you got introduced to one of the best YA agents out there thanks to luck and connections, without even writing a book... You also have no interest in storytelling and readers and only want money and popularity
RQ was basically a manufactured product, without an ounce of creativity or passion, marketed and hyped just to make money.
No wonder you're struggling so much you write a pilot and the talks of movies vanished like smoke
In the old post about my journey to publication, I told a management company that I wanted to write the next big YA series. I'm happy to explain the context, as I gather you aren't really aware of how the entertainment industry works. This was a general meeting, which is basically just an introduction with no guarantees of anything beyond the 45 minutes. It was also the only general with potential representation that I landed following my very recent graduation from film school in 2012. Namely, I was scared, desperate, and very eager to get signed and pursue the career I wanted my entire life. I pitched a handful of projects, both feature and television, both finished and potential ideas. The last one was the glimmer of Red Queen, and yes, I absolutely said, I want this to be the next big YA series. I want this to be Hunger Games, Divergent, Twilight, etc.
Let's break that down. I'm not going to go too deeply into the difference between entertainment and publishing, but please understand I am very much selling myself, my talent, and my dream. That's how those meetings go. You swing for the damn fences. And you translate. You give tonal references. You talk about a property they know (i.e. The Hunger Games) and say you're next. I did this with my other projects as well (the one that got me in the door was a pilot I pitched as Gossip Girl in the Gilded Age).
One thing I don't understand here is the idea that wanting to be the next big thing, wanting success, wanting your story to be experienced by as many people as possible - somehow, wanting is a bad thing? Or a dirty secret? I guarantee you, we all want our work to blow up. We all want wonderful, passionate readers in the millions and billions. That's totally natural. It's okay to be an artist and want success for your art! I don't subscribe to the idea that we must hide our wants or our dreams.
I will also say in regards to your accusation that my books are "hyped and marketed to make money"....um yeah? Publishing is a business. My publishing house publishes books to make money. They have far more complex business practices than I understand, and hundreds of people dedicated to leveraging books in exactly the right way so this industry can continue to operate on razor thin margins.
And writing is my full time job. Again, it seems to be some dirty secret that writers have to get paid if they want to keep working, or else have another avenue of income. I certainly didn't get into writing, either screen or prose, to make money. I pursued this because it is my true passion, and I deeply feel this is my purpose in life. It also happens to be how I make money now, and I'm extremely lucky to be in this position.
In regards to meeting my agent through good luck - yes, absolutely, and I've never said anything otherwise. In hindsight I know exactly how many bullets I dodged when my industry contact sent the completed manuscript* of Red Queen to New Leaf. And Suzie ended up reading it in a weekend.
*Yes, completed manuscript. A book was written. I was never signed with anyone until RQ was a finished draft. In fact, Suzie didn't sign me until after we did a revision together.
And yes, the talk of a RQ movie "vanished like smoke" because we decided to pursue adapting the show as a television/streaming series. You can't try to make one property into two mediums. I'm very happy with our pilot process (the story is so much better suited to a series) and again, I've been so, so lucky in the team we have. Beth Schwartz is my showrunner and she has been a truly excellent partner so far!
You can believe whatever you like about me, or my intentions as a creator. I really don't mind. I know exactly how much passion, drive, desperation, fear, and luck goes into my work. I'm not sure what your intention is with this message, but thanks for giving me the opportunity to clarify what was confusing to you. Be well. I hope you look more kindly on other creators than you do on me.
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thalfox · 2 months ago
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it really scares me how anti-ship the obm fandom has gotten lately. i’ve seen a user say they hope someone else gets hit with a car over a problematic ship. i don’t even have any taboo ships but i still find that so disturbing. how can you wish death on a human being over a ship they have of fictional characters? i get that it’s a messed up ship [it grosses me out too] but that’s what the block button is for! i don’t get how the shaming and hatred helps anybody
I feel like this goes very much in hand with the multiple asks I've had this week thanking me for still being in the OM fandom and that it's great to see me posting again (thank you! 🥺), as well as others expressing concern that it is hard to maintain an interest in the game because of the issues in this ask.
It's no secret that I took a big break this year, both from fic writing and from interacting with fandom, due to personal and family health trials and tribulations (some of which are sadly still ongoing).
But it also looks like I missed a definite spread of toxicity not just in OM fandom, but online in general.
Don't get me wrong, social media has been worsening at a rapid pace the last 5 years or so, but the pandemic and lockdown really accelerated the process.
I genuinely cannot imagine the privilege it must take to spend time policing and harassing marginalised people online, rather than having to deal with actual trauma, harm, and bigotry experienced every single day.
The same people who profess to act out of caring for others, yet don't hesitate to wish death and abuse upon people that are very likely amongst those struggling to just continue existing in the world right now.
It was bad enough seeing this play out in my professional life, when I was hounded by misogynists, homophobes, transphobes, and white supremacists. But to see it in fandom, over fictional creations?
I could lay out all my experience of early childhood trauma, and the other abuse I've survived that has all landed me as permanently disabled, but nobody has any right to know what I contend with daily, nor does anyone have the right to demand such of you.
The people who wish death and abuse on others because of a fictional character do not care about actual abuse and trauma survivors. And they absolutely don't do anything in their offline lives to help those that desperately need help. If they did, they wouldn't ever wish death upon anyone.
~
Social media does at least have provisions for blocking and muting such people, and I'm always sadly unsurprised when I ask about any such person only to discover the majority of the fandom already has them blocked.
That is the small upside really - these people are a minority. A loud minority, but a minority all the same. And most of your favourite writers and artists probably already have them blocked.
I would also advise to simply ignore these people as well as blocking them. Why abusing others is fun for them is something they clearly need to work through on their own, as is their pretence of acting in defense of those they actually harm.
~
If there are things you don't want to see, or even have triggers around, block the tags and/or creators for your own mental health. I have trauma triggers, and while some stuff occasionally manages to creep through, blocking tags and users is very helpful 💖
~
I had an ask about my ships this week, which may have been asked in good faith or as bait.
All my ships are of an OC and a canon character (Mammon x OC, Lucifer x OC, Satan x OC, Beel x OC) with the exception of Asmo x Solomon.
I love making OCs, and I love seeing everyone else's OCs, as well as how everyone characterises the canon characters.
I have also repeatedly stated in my theories that the demon "brothers" are not related, as they are fallen angels, poofed into existence by their "father", and that while Luke is likely hundreds if not thousands of years old, his choice of appearance is to be respected, with him treated as a kid.
I've also passed along warnings in my discord when someone was sharing lewd art of Luke in the main tags on tumblr, as well as shared my exasperation when somebody on twitter declared that any art, any normal unproblematic art showing Luke made the artist a p-word, and that Luke should only ever be drawn by the OM artists and nobody else ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
~
Anyone who has read my theories knows my stance on such, and the fact that recent leaked screenshots of my discord server showed the "worst" as just snippets of the above is very telling.
Thankfully, it was only my own privacy that was invaded and not any of the members of my private - not public - discord server.
Unfortunately it does mean that the server will be closed to new members for the foreseeable future.
With over 200 active members I feel a responsibility to guarantee the privacy of those within a private server. Those who broke that rule - all of two people - were kicked. (No coincidence I only got two asks demanding to know if I was "deleting all the backlash". I had one comment full of nsfw language that was deleted. That's it. Y'all can read just fine for yourselves! ^-^)
~
For those saying they are struggling to maintain an interest in OM, it's okay to take a break!
I resisted taking one for a long time, scared I'd lose my hyperfocus. But I lost my focus anyway 😅 I went back to Resident Evil fandom for a while, and once I'd got through the initial hyperfocus there, my attention zoomed back to OM.
A change is as good as a rest as they say, and I came back much more enthused about my plot direction and characters.
For anyone wondering, I am back writing Howl again atm, but I'm not pressuring myself with any kind of deadline. I'm just enjoying writing it 😊
If you are already on my discord server, there are a couple of exclusives there for you - Future Wolves, a short fic set a long time after Wolf At Your Door and Howl; the first chapter of my Simeon shortfic; extracts from Howl; and some insights into mystery characters like Azrael 👀
More than that though, you can see the works of many talented writers and artists, theorists and musicians and more.
The number one rule of my discord has never changed, and it's one I use for pretty much any online presence:
No toxicity, bigotry, bullying, harassment, or anti-fan/char behaviour is welcome.
It's an approach I highly recommend! 💖
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hazydaaze · 9 months ago
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An analysis of the Bold Type that I need to get off my chest (it'll be worth it, I promise)
I studied English literature at university, and it has always been instinctive for me to analyse characters, storylines, bigger pictures and under the surface tensions in film & tv. Discussing emotions, motivations and themes with my gf and my pals late at night is one of my favourite pastimes ever and I love everything to do with filmography and art ahhhh. (I wrote my dissertation on David Bowie & The Artistry of Sexuality, ya feel me?)
The Bold Type isn't filmography at all, but I think Jane Sloan and Jacqueline Carlyle hit different for me, being a queer woman in my 20s and a full-time writer. I can't really explain why. I guess there are a lot of queer female characters in film & tv that don't really feel inherently queer, and even as two identifying straight women Jane and Jacqueline felt queer to me. Their connection and understanding of each other was authentic and quite complex. I think they had potential to be something that we'd never seen before in mainstream media, because of their age difference and life experiences. I thought that was so compelling and so important to talk about and to give a recognised space to.
There is one thing that struck me most about them and it's insane to me that I haven't seen a lot of analysis on it, so it's the point of this post.
To my knowledge the show or actors haven't delved too deeply into it either, and given what went down I don't understand why people AREN'T talking about it. I wanted to bring it up. Btw, this post contains spoilers.
***Sexual abuse trigger warning***
In season 1, we learn that Jacqueline is the victim of rape, and the only person she has told about it is her husband, Ian. Given that she mentions that they've been married for around 19 years and the assault happened before they met, we can assume Jacqueline has been carrying the weight of what happened to her for over two decades. During all that time she didn't talk about it with anyone else, not a single other person.
And then Tiny Jane comes along. Jane Sloan, the big swing writer who just wants to write meaningful stories that help other women and girls that need it, like she did growing up. She fucks up a lot on the way and slowly begins discarding her judgemental opinions as she grows. But when she is at her best she has genuine compassion and empathy for people, and despite her reservations, Jacqueline gives her the opportunity to write about the story of a rape survivor and performance artist. She isn't aware, at the time, what that means for her own trauma or her own acceptance of it. But she does it anyway, because she sees something in Jane and she has seen it there from the beginning.
Jane starts to write and, as we know, in the most beautiful and compelling moment at the season 1 finale, Jacqueline is confronted with what happened to her. She stands in Central Park holding these weights, and you can see the crushing pain in her eyes as the realisation descends down on her. She shares a look with Jane, and a moment of understanding passes between them at what this means.
Despite all this, she lets Jane capture her trauma. She lets her publish her untold experience of her rape from two decades gone. She lets millions of people see her story in writing, with Jane Sloan's name printed above it. She re-lives and faces up to the harsh reality of that pain and that truth, through Jane.
Can you even imagine the trust you must have in someone to do that? The sheer love that took, for Jacqueline to give Jane her voice and her truth, with all its painful and hard repercussions?
This storyline is the boldest part of the Bold Type. It's the most honest and the most authentic. It captures the raw emotion of Jacqueline, and of Jane, and the two characters really see each other for who they are. It's one of the reasons why their relationship is so central to the other's storyline.
We don't ever see Jane truly unpick in detail what Jacqueline did for her. It spoke so many volumes and ... well, isn't that what love is?
It's this storyline that sets the tone for their relationship over the course of the show. Jacqueline sacrifices herself for Jane again and again. She publishes the article about the lack of accessible healthcare at Safford and gets fired for doing so, purely so Jane can afford to freeze her eggs. Jacqueline says there were a lot of other things that contributed to it, but Jane knows her article was the final straw, the point of no return.
Over a decade of pouring everything she could give into Scarlet Magazine and it’s readers, only to be gone in a second. All for Jane.
And again, in season 4, in the few real moments we are given between them, one of their final interactions is Jacqueline giving Jane the go-ahead to explore a story of potential abuse at States & Nations, a company Ian is associated with. Ian literally asks Jacqueline to stop pursuing the story, due to the sexual relationship he had with the source when he and Jacqueline were separated. When Jane challenges Jacqueline over her reasoning for pulling the story, she asks her to give the story a chance. Jacqueline lets her, knowing full well that it could prove irreparably damaging to her marriage and her family, and she does it anyway.
Jacqueline chooses the truth, over her career and over her marriage. She chooses Jane. As humans, there isn't much more you can give to someone else. I’m wracking my brains trying to think of a way Jacqueline could portray her love for Jane more, and I’m all out of ideas.
I want to reiterate again how insane it is to me that none of this is really acknowledged, or at least not nearly as much as it should be amongst the show, its creators and its viewers, Jacqueline continually falls on her sword for Jane (weird analogy, but she does) and it is repeatedly glossed over. Their relationship is quickly dismissed as a "mother Jane never had" or a simple "boss/employee" power dynamic, and it seems so hollow, unjust and sorry - so unbelievably boring - in contrast to the experiences they have shared together and the sacrifices they have made.
I understand Jacqueline’s character was based on Cosmopolitan Editor in Chief, Joanna Coles, and therefore it makes sense that this queerness to her relationship with Jane was not intended. However, it’s there. Everything I mentioned in the post happened on the show in canon.
In 2021, the possibility that these two women could have romantic or sexual feelings towards each other shouldn't be a stretch. If either of these women were male characters with this much intertwined investment, high stakes and sacrifice, there would be no doubt they would be endgame. They would run away, have the hottest sex, all the while their reputations would be forever ruined in the name of love. And we, as viewers, would celebrate it without question - we would never dismiss it.
The concept of what they are, and what they can be as two women should be able to live and thrive. It should be given a beating heart. In the very least, the reality of it should be on the table and up for debate. But for many viewers, and the show’s creators, it just isn’t. And here lies the problem.
Jane and Jacqueline have such a beautiful dynamic, it is so deep and soul-wrenching. How can we ever limit what these two women are and what they would do for each other?
I really hope that one day we can see a relationship like theirs given the queer space it deserves. Because it would've been the bold thing (and the right thing) to do.
I'm going to publish a longer and more in-depth article about this on Medium, because as I said, analysing is my favourite pastime and I can't stop doing it. But for now, this is all I can manage.
Edit: Read my published Medium article.
Here's to Jane and Jacqueline and what could've been.
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freshtriangle · a month ago
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VALENTINE’S BILLDIP INSCRIPTIONS OPEN (WRITERS NEEDED)
WE NEED WRITERS AND BETA READERS, FEEL FREE TO APPLY RIGHT NOW SO EVERYONE CAN WORKS SOONER THANK YOU
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It’s almost Valentine's day and Dipper wants to write a letter for his favorite demon. However he lacks sleep and can’t manage to write anything good. Our beloved Pinetree needs some inspiration from a muse, YOU. 
Even a muse needs some help. One artist and one writer will be paired together. (Randomly or by affinity as long as everyone agrees. If you don't have a partner, you will be paired up with me, hehehe)
Are you a writer ? 
Sweet ! Time to write a nice letter. No more than 4K words or Bill gonna burn your letter ! NSFW is allowed as long your partner is okay with that and with the appropriate TW.
Are you an artist ? 
Sweet ! You will illustrate a key moment of your choice from the letter of your partner. NSFW is allowed as long your partner is okay with that and with the appropriate TW. 
ABOUT NSFW : I’ll only check the age of the participants who want to make NSFW. (minors will be with minors, it’s safer that way)
You want to join but you want to work alone ? 
Bill needs your help too ! Ask me and I'm gonna send a letter Dipper wrote. You can answer the letter in the name of Bill, or make a nice drawing about it to reward Dipper for his hard work.
I want to be a beta reader :
You are a good soul and want to help but don’t have time to write or draw ? Then you can be a beta reader !
Can I write a specific AU ?
Of course. 
Can I write/draw something else than Billdip ?
Sure ! Whatever the ship you write or draw, go ahead as long as you tell me in advance so I can find a partner for you. 
Will you do something in this event ?
I will be a backup writer/ artist if needed. 
HOW TO JOIN :
Just talk to me in Discord or here. Inscriptions are open until the 5th january. You will have your partner on the 6th or even before if many people join. (so if you want to join don't wait too much, just tell me you are interested and we will seeeee)
If you join after the 5th january you will be paired up with me. Keep in mind I’ll say yes for ONE late participant but won’t do that for more than one. 
It would be a good thing, I think, if the writer and the artist agree quickly on a rough idea of what the artist would like to draw even if the letter isn't completed yet. To be sure everything is going smoothly I will check on all of you twice. 
FIRST CHECK IN :  21 JANUARY.  A key moment must have already been decided between the writer and the artist. The sooner, the better, but this is the last day to decide that. 
SECONDE CHECK IN : 4 FEBRUARY. Half of the art and the writing should be completed. 
it’s okay to be late as long your respect the main deadline. Please contact me asap if you can’t do this event anymore ! 
DEADLINE : 13-16 february
PLEASE TAG YOUR WORK AS #billdipvalentineday
I will reblog everything anyway ☺️
SUGGESTIONS OR QUESTIONS
If you guys have any suggestions, or even questions please go ahead ! I don't bite, and I know it's poor organisation here, I got the idea not too long ago and now it's too late to do it perfectly sooo.. GO WILD.
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book-o-scams · 8 months ago
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'Sorry Wrong Ed' Alternate Ending Storyboard Sequence
Check out Al Kang's Ed, Edd n Eddy portfolio!
Al Kang worked on the show during seasons 3-4 and had roles on the storyboard and prop teams apparently. (IMDb says he was credited as Al Choi at the time, but it also says he worked on season 1 episodes, which doesn't line up with the timeline he mentioned.. anyway.)
I discovered his portfolio a few months ago after seeing fandom discussion of the alternate 'Sorry Wrong Ed' ending. I was pleasantly surprised to find a few other treats as well! But yes, I even sorta liked what I learned about 'Sorry Wrong Ed' in the process... (I threw in a little analysis comparing the two endings at the bottom)
I noticed Al seemed to mix up the order on these, so I thought I'd try my best to figure out the right order. This was the most confusing one for me to try and figure out the order of since almost all 8 pages were out of order. I think I finally figured out what's going on in the original ending.
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So this alternate ending starts at an unknown point with Eddy flat on the ground, presumably injured, picking himself back up. At this point in the final cut of the episode, Eddy has just been squashed by a tree, but this seems more like a different injury, and he's not even retaining his injuries from the truck scene... The scenes with Jonny and Plank from the final cut of the episode seem to not exist at all here, Jonny and Plank don't appear in this sequence.
Anyway, Eddy picks himself up in the middle of an on-going scene, sees Jimmy drop a coin in a jar for Ed, who has inexplicably turned the cursed phone into a scam on his own. Edd is glaring at the off-screen kids, who have somehow learned about this phone and are excited to kill Eddy with it.
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Eddy: "Jimmy! No!"
Jimmy answers the phone: "Hello?"
Ed: "HA HA HA"
Edd: "You people don't seriously believe--"
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Then we sync up with gags that did happen in the ending of Sorry Wrong Ed, with context that makes its tone a little more sadistic than random. Jimmy's paid phonecall drops the sandbox on Eddy.
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This page has the most skeletal dialogue...
Kev: "Yes." (I think he's meant to be fist pumping because Eddy got hurt, more of a "Yes!")
Jimmy: "BAD LUCK EDDY PHONE." (this dialogue must have been a placeholder)
Edd: "HA HA" (sarcastic ha-ha or did Al mean to write "Ed" for this?)
Jimmy seems to offer the phone to Edd.
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We sync up again with Edd's denial from the final cut of this episode, except now it actually makes sense that he's so one-track-minded, because there are people actively arguing with him and keeping him disengaged from the victim.
Edd: "There must be a cargo plane overfilled with playground supplies..."
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Sarah interrupts him.
RING RING
Sarah: "Oh, that's for me."
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Eddy at this point holds Ed responsible, as he should, and starts running to stop Ed or Sarah. Ed offers no explanation for his betrayal.
Eddy: "Ed! What are you doing!?"
Sarah: "Hello?"
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Sarah's paid phonecall summons the hippos, the most random moment in the final cut of the episode. Note how both of these slapstick gags were storyboarded on the same generic background, seems like the lane or an empty lot, but clearly a different location than Eddy's front yard from the aired ending.
And that's all we have to go off of!
I'll put my updated opinions below the cut, but suffice it to say, I like the episode a little better now! Knowing what the ending was going to be and trying to figure out the choices that led to the ending we got, I feel more appreciative that it didn't end up a lost episode or something and less annoyed that it was 11 minutes of one joke.
I know I have a reputation for not finding slapstick funny and disliking this episode, but violence was never my only issue. Lots of episodes have lackluster slapstick that I just let wash over me. My point that never gets as much focus is that this episode never felt FINISHED to begin with. It's just a slapstick vacuum with no ending and no point, and it used to be frustrating to me not knowing for sure if my hunch was right or not that it felt like the episode just wasn't working and they had to cobble it together from the scenes that almost worked.
I am surprised to say I like the episode more now that I know that is pretty close to the truth. Judging from this peek into the episode's development, this episode seems to have reached Danny Antonucci's and/or Wootie's (the episode's lead board artist) limit for being mean-spirited with the characters without a reason. I'll still probably avoid rewatching it, but knowing the episode has no ending specifically because it's been trimmed to bare bones is somehow reassuring.
The most obvious flaw to this original ending is the lack of motivation for Ed's or the kids' actions. The kids presumably still weren't in the rest of the episode, so there's really no reason for them to be here other than reiterating the same idea from 'Your Ed Here' and 'The Good Ole Ed' that the neighborhood kids are always looking for a reason to gang up on Eddy, something that isn't really true of those characters in earlier seasons.
I think I can imagine how, on paper (in the writers' outline), this episode sounded funnier. Trying to imagine this ending as part of the whole episode, I think the script's idea of the final joke is that Ed is not satisfied with ending the tests at the point where they tried to return the phone to Rolf. I think Ed converts the curse-testing process to a scam at that point, building off of how Ed already wasn't processing Eddy's safety in anything so far, and is probably more focused on proving to Edd that curses are real (as Ed was previously in league with Evil Tim). The addition of Ed running his own tests and the kids arguing Eddy's point against Edd's while Eddy's busy, does sound more like a complete manic cartoon boiling point than the way the finished episode just petered out with Edd as the sole antagonist. But unfortunately, in visual execution, suddenly piling in so many aggressive characters and so much random violence at once, would only really result in it petering out at a higher volume.
Meanwhile Edd's characterization is made much more structurally sound in the original ending. He's annoyed FOR Eddy's sake, and the only reason he's not actively helping Eddy is because like 3 other characters were supposed to be arguing with him while this was happening. It seems extremely apparent to me that the cuts made to this ending were for the sake of mitigating Ed's reputation in the fandom, as well as the kids', and I think it's really unfortunate that Edd's characterization was the cost for salvaging everyone else's. I'm glad I already considered his behavior in 'Sorry Wrong Ed' non-canon, because now it feels like the reason the aired ending is so out-of-character is just because Edd is basically arguing with the ghost of the original scene. I formally forgive 'Sorry Wrong Ed'. Production turnarounds are tough and AKA did their best to not turn this into another forgotten 'Special Ed' episode that simply wasn't working.
I think ditching the original ending was ultimately the right call. It was not an exemplary episode, but I can admit it's less out of place to have a pure "vacuum of violence" story than it would've been to essentially give the kids a supernatural revenge plot like this. That would've been really weird to have to accept-- Eddy definitely wouldn't want to be friends with anyone at the end of the movie if THIS was their past. Changing it to an unaware Jonny and a questionably aware Plank being responsible, indeed, was a vibe that landed much more like standard EEnE fare. It was weird enough that the kids all saw Santa in JJJ, can you imagine if they all knew curses were real AND participated in attacking a neighbor with one??
If there was a silver lining for me the first time I saw this episode, it was that none of the kids were directly involved in Eddy's suffering. It made the questionable reality of the cursed device slightly more acceptable that only the Eds and Rolf know about the curse. If this ending had happened, I would've reacted the same, but I would've rejected its continuity even more than I do now, because it would just feel like they animated one of the DC Comics (where the kids can blow the Eds up with fireworks at the end or the Eds can randomly be crushed under an avalanche of anvils)-- the art could end up gorgeous but the characterizations don't exactly land as real human beings, the balance this show strives for typically.
And I think that's all I wanted to say! In the end, I found myself liking 'Sorry Wrong Ed' slightly more than I used to, all thanks to this glimpse into how the animation production system morphs the outcome of a cartoon. Thanks so much to Al Kang, for sharing your art and this insight into the industry! I don't know whether he did both the gesture drawings and the revised art, but judging from his other boards I think the cleaned up art is his, and I liked seeing the poses that almost were!
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fat-zygerrian · 5 months ago
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Not that I ever wanted to watch it because of the era it plays in, but what was so awful about Star Wars resistance?
Oh Okay this ask got me GOING so Welcome to my Tedtalk on my feelings on Star Wars Resistance; a story of Disappointment.
So Mr. Dave Filoni, the story telling Prince, left the show like halfway through production of the first season for other projects (For TCW season 7 and The Mandalorian). This left what was a promising show with characters Dave himself had created, in the hands of very inexperienced story board artist and writers. Personally, I think they panicked and half assed it so that Disney could make money on toys. Because.. idk. It just doesn't even come close to the emotional story arcs that TCW and Rebels gave us. and that's what Star Wars is supposed to be about. Changing for the better. Hope or some shit, am I right?
What was most disappointing in my opinion.. is that the protagonist, Kazudo Xiono, is UNBEARABLE. He is the EMBODIEMENT of privilege. This punk has had everything handed down to him from the moment he was born. He was born like 14 years after the Empire has been brought down and the New Republic reigns, so he has never known war. AND HIS DADDY IS THE SENATOR OF HOSNIAN PRIME FOR FUCKS SAKE! THE CAPITOL????? WHERE THE SENATE IS???? YOU KNOW HOW RICH THAT MUST MAKE HIs FaMiLY??? His dad literally gives him an allowance even though he is a grown ass man in the military when the show starts.
To put things into perspective for those not up to date on Sequel Era Lore and I envy you greatly tbh bcs not to be that person i do not like the sequels that's the equivalent of being the Senator of Coruscant in the Prequels!!!!
Not to mention he is a BUMBLING idiot. Like. This man has ADHD on steroids. As a person with ADHD it's.. lord, it's cringe. He is clumsy. He is loud. He says inappropriate things at the wrong time. He doesn't know how to do anything for himself. AND HE IS SUPPOSED TO BE A SPY FOR THE RESISTANCE UNDER COVER AS A MECHANIC???? HE KNOWS NOTHING ABOUT MECHANICS and really doesn't really learn anything about it by the time the show ends. And don't come at me saying this is a kids show so I cant complain about things being silly bcs I'm not the target audience. I can and I will bcs no one was NEARLY this obnoxious in TCW or Rebels. Kaz is Jarjar Level, but I ACTUALLY LIKE JARJAR!
DUDE IS A DAMN SPY HE DOESNT EVEN LIKE GO BY AN ALLIAS!!! HE DEADASS USES HIS REAL FULL NAME. BCS KAZ IS AN IDIOT.
I'm not saying he isn't a good person. Kaz is very sweet tbh. He's just an unknowing spoiled ass man-child who NEVER REALLY DEVELOPS INTO ANYTHING ELSE?????
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It would be okay if he entered the show like this and exited a more mature, capable man. But he really doesn't. There are never any consequences for his actions. Ever. Other than when he becomes a spy and, again, IS USING HIS REAL LEGAL NAME as a spy for the Resistance... to avoid a scandal and to scold him for LITERALLY DESERTING THE NAVY his daddy cuts him off from his allowance. So instead of half assing his cover job as a mechanic, Kaz has to actually apply himself so he can make money for food. He doesn't improve much. His co-workers (Who are MUCH more interesting than him) constantly complain about him messing things up and making their jobs more difficult.
Man, FUCK KAZ. MY HOMIES HATE KAZ. BEING HOT CAN ONLY GET YOU SO FAR!!!!!
At the Season one finale there is a moment where you think he is finally going to grow as a man! Grow into the protagonist we deserve! Tragedy, for the first time in his life, strikes Kaz! It's during the events of episode 7, when The First Order blows up Hosnian Prime. His home planet. Where his FATHER LIVES. He has a moment of humanity and he is devastated. He almost cries. But he sucks it up to finish the mission and get his friends off base for their safety. He is a man now. and the audience feels a sense of comradery for Kaz. After all, Star Wars is about Fathers. Kaz has lost his father forever. His father was KILLED by the First Order. He now, first hand, has experienced real loss for the first time and this is going to help him grow and toughen up. he has to live on his own now. Our hero has a reason to be doing what he's doing. Fighting against the first order.
BUT NAH. FAM. then the very next fucking EPISODE YOU FIND OUT HIS DAD IS FUCKING ALIVE AND THAT HE DIDNT ACTUALLY EXPEIRENCE THE LOSS THAT HE HAD THOUGHT, AND HE GOES RIGHT BACK TO BEING HIS GOOFY ASS CHILDISH SELF. NO. I HATED THAT. THERE WAS NO REASON FOR GROWTH. MAN FUCK RESISTANCE.
FUCK. IF ANYONE DESERVED THEIR FATHER TO LIVE THROUGH A DAMN PLANETORY DESTRUCTION IT WAS MY GIRL LEIA, NOT FUCKING KAZUDO THE CLOWN XIONO. FUCK. guys I'm sorry I just really hate this god damn character.
Like. Lemme break it down, folks.
TCW started and Ahsoka enters. I HATED Ahsoka for a long time. Bcs she was young, cocky and annoying. But that was on purpose. Narratively, she experiences loss, she experiences pain and GROws as a character while navigating her Jedi life during the war. Our girl grows into the capable protagonist that we EXPECT out of a Star Wars story.
Same for Rebels. We meet Ezra, and he's not quite as annoying as Ahsoka was at first in my opinion (I cannot stress how much I did not care for Ahsoka yall) but he was young. He was childish. But he was more capable at 14 than fucking Kaz was at 20. By the end of Rebels, not only is he more wise and capable, but he is selfless. He has found his own path and it's only because of what he has gone through. His journey has made him stronger. Ezra is my favorite Star Wars journey, if I'm being honest. He is the perfect example of character development.
KAZUDO XIONO ENTERS SEASON ONE AS A 20 YEAR OLD MAN-CHILD USING DADDY'S MONEY WHO IS LOUD AND DOESNT KNOW WHEN THE STFU... AND EXITS THE FINALE... AS A LOUD MAN-CHILD WHO CAN NOW USE TOOLS. He doesn't' experience REAL FAMILIAL loss. He doesn't really experience a lot of character development at all. Things just happen around him, he helps, but he doesn't learn. He doesn't grow. I fucking hate that.
Literally every single character in the show BESIDEs Kaz is more interesting than him. and EXPEIRENCE CHARACTER GROWTH!!!
Jarek Yeager, Kaz's boss in the mechanic shop, was in the Rebellion and LOST HIS FAMILY. He is a sexy ass man too. HE starts the show not wanting to help the Resistance at all bcs he's experienced loss since his days in the Rebellion, and his heart is hard and he's comfortable. By the end of the show he is risking not just his career, but his VERY LIFE to help the Resistance.
Tam Ryvora, Kaz's co-worker. Daughter figure to Yeager and a total bad ass woman of color. She is the one on the show who experiences the most character development and struggles to find her identity while the First Order is taking over the galaxy. I LOVE her.
There are these 2 kids who are force sensitive and orphaned after Kylo Ren comits GENOCIDE on their planet. This arc set up is never fully addressed nor does it have a conclusion, like most story arcs on this show tbh.
There's a literal witch for some reason??
There's this fucking rad ass sexy Mirilian Pirate girl named Synara who FOR SOME REASON is suggested to be Kaz's love interest. Gross. Girl, you gay. Move in.
I could go on and on and on. But I wont. Fuck this show. Fuck Kaz. It literally adds NOTHING to the bigger Star Wars lore. TCW and Rebels do this beautifully and this show is a hot mess of ideas and characters that never come to a satisfying story telling conclusion.
Thanks for coming to my tedtalk, dont watch Resistance.
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starshiningsirius · a year ago
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Affection (Yandere Floyd x reader)
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Turns out @minteasketches birthday is the day before mine and I couldn't decide who I wanted to write for so I asked for a few of her favorite characters and had a draft for Floyd that would have sat. So I'll just post this on her birthday as a gift and have this be my post for my birthday too! Happy Birthday by the way you wonderful writer and artist I love your work!🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳
"I really don't like youuu~"
Floyd took a step closer towards the student with a menacing look in his eyes. Anyone who pissed him off had hell to pay for it that was for sure. He would make sure he never layed his disgusting fingers on her again.
His adorable little shrimpy that he adored so much. It was always oh so tempting to hold her close and squeeze her tight, which is what he usually did on the daily basis, but today was different. She had to spend time with another student and denied his affections promptly. After she had left him after apologizing Floyd went into depression again. His shrimpy never failed to brighten his day. Except today of course, when he didn't feel like going to club, specially not with his bad mood.
"Why does she have to spend time with someone else, can't she see I need her more." He released a sigh thinking more and more about the whole situation, her words recalling in his mind.
Then an idea popped up in his head. He could always spend time with her afterwards. She mentioned going to the library to tutor, he'd surprise her there, as soon as she was done!
He arrived there early then the supposed study session. He was actually hiding behind a bookshelf waiting for her to arrive. He noticed one student sitting their waiting impatiently. He assumed that he was the idiot who needed some help. After a little while he finally saw her arrive. It did irritate him to see her with someone else, but he knew the kind of person Y/n was and leaving someone to fail just wasn't her.
Overtime he started to see her become frustrated which wasn't like her in the slightest. She even taught the little sea otter who was beyond hope when it came to teaching him something. She was ever patient and calm the entire time. This guy managed to piss her off so easily, he had to be doing something wrong, at least that's what Floyd deduced. Seeing her so angry made him both curious and annoyed. What could he possibly have said to make her mad?
Floyd at least had a bit more constraint in him today and decided to listen in to gain some understanding.
"Hey, why do you always spend time with that eel?"
"Can you focus please?"
"Why as far as I'm concerned your hanging out with a crazy pyscho merman? He's gotta be forcing you." This student was really getting on his nerves.
He took his time away from his shrimpy, and for what to spread lies and try to pull her away from him. Not only that he placed his hand on her and she looked discomforted by it, never did she feel that way when Floyd would hug her randomly. It really didn't sit well with him, he was agitated and beyond that rage filled his system. That was never a good sign for anyone nearby.
He was about a second from taking the student and squeezing the life out of him literally. Until he saw his little shrimp stand from her seat.
"An arrogant bastard like you could never compare Floyd! He's far more sweet and lovable then you'll ever be! Don't you dare ever say shit about him!" She actually punched him across his face which surprised Floyd greatly cause the impact knocked the student out of his chair.
She immediately picked up her books and went off towards her dorm Floyd assumed, he couldn't keep his eyes off her until she exited the library. His heart was pounding faster in his chest and a smile ecstasy. Shrimpy really thought of him like that huh?
It definitely made him feel happy to learn how she felt. Maybe he should tell her he feels the same too! Ah, but Floyd still doesn't know himself what the feeling is but since Jade's so smart he'll just ask him!
He heard the groans of the student on the ground which brought him out of his thoughts. He saw the student getting back up from the floor murmuring curses and insulting his darling Shrimpy. It definitely reminded him of his rage against him for taking up her time in the first place, but now he insults her it struck a sense of bloodlust in the eel. He shouldn't do this in here though, he's sure Jade could help him get rid of any evidence too.
. . .
"Angelfish where are youuuu~?"
"Floyd-" She couldn't speak for a second cause a pair of long arms wrapped around her neck, covering her mouth, and a head nuzzled in her cheek.
"Yup~" He showed her a sharp toothed smile.
"Floyd you seem overly happy these days, has something happened?"
"Huh~ What do ya mean Shrimpy? I get to spend more time with you that always makes me happy!"
She was relieved on the inside since she tried calling him yesterday after the library incident and he didn't pick up. She called Jade too but he said his brother was doing something important for Azul, for a second there she thought she had put him in one of his bad mood swings by denying him.
Speaking of which,
"Floyd?" He wouldn't stop nuzzling her until he heard her voice calling him.
"Yeah?"
"Sorry about yesterday, I shouldn't have denied your offer, that guy was a total prick. I should have chosen you instead. If you forgive me I'll get you some candy at Sam's Shop?" She tried to offer him.
"Eh? It's fine Shrimpy but since your offering I want to get some and share it with you!" He seemed far more cheerful than the mood you left him in yesterday. Usually his mood swings would last the whole day and bargaining him with something would work even his brother didn't have control over him all the time.
It definitely felt strange in her mind but she had to dismiss it with Floyd pulling her arm in the direction of the school store.
. . .
He had brought a lot of supplies from the store more than usual. As she had asked out of curiosity he said it was a surprise. Later on the next day she found out that the surprise was making takoyaki together.
It really did surprise her, seeing Floyd be this thoughtful took her by surprise. He was more of a PDA type rather than wholesome cooking together. She did tell him once that she wanted to try it once with him,, after learning his favorite food. That was a while ago though and for him to remember such a small detail like that. She shrugged it off as nothing though and went about doing the instructions Floyd gave as they worked together in the Octanivelle kitchen.
Both of them were enjoying themselves and when it came time to heat them up he put in one last ingredient mixing with the cream color mixture. He didn't want to tell her what it was but he said it was extra special.
When it came time that it was all done he told her to open wide.
"Shrimpy come on open up~! I want you to try the first bite of this new batch so you can tell me what you think! " He looked happy and stared at her in anticipation.
The gaze had her face turning red in which she could hear the laugh of the other twin within the empty Monstro Lounge. She didn't want to keep him waiting so she did as he was told and opened her mouth.
Soon as the sphere shaped food had entered and she had chewed the taste was weird, normal savory flavor but with the taste of something she couldn't put her finger on.
It wasn't that many of the food and as soon as she finished she had another pressed to her lips. Until it was all gone did the process repeat. That's when her vision began to get hazy.
"Floyd I don't feel so well. I think I need to go to the infirmary." Her body swayed as tried standing before she could take a step her body fell over tripping on air possibly.
"Eh~ What do you mean, Angelfish? You don't need to rely on anyone else but me." He had pulled her toward his chest the warmth lulling her senses into a gentle slumber.
. . .
When she woke up she found herself in Floyd's room, the messy appearance of it familiar to her. It was strange though since she couldn't remember coming into the room or falling asleep. The taste of takoyaki though remained on her tongue and she recalled a couple of things including the so called 'special ingredient' Floyd put in a few of them that he got from Azul.
It must have put her to sleep, but why would Floyd do something like this?
When she heard the door open she looked up and saw the man in question. He was elated to finally see her awake and ran over to you quickly.
"Angelfish! Your finally up! Great that means we can play now!" One word in particular stood out to her.
"Angelfish? You usually call me Shrimpy. Floyd what's going on?" She was confused and wanted answers but it only made the eel happy.
"Oh your mine now! That little study session of yours with that annoying little crab, you defended me, it was so amazing to see you angry for me Angelfish! It made me so happy so I had to show my affection back some way."
"What do you mean?" She did not like where this was going. She had used violence which was unlike her but with Floyd's seeing it too it's not a good thing for how he would interpret it. She did like the eel of course but she might have put the life of a student in danger.
"He was trying to take my angelfish away from me, so I let him know just how much I love you! Jade said it'd be good to show you how much and you used violence so I should do the same!" He nuzzled his mouth near her neck invoking a shiver to crawl up the girl's spine as he inhaled her scent.
That guy was right about him being dangerous, but he only did want to show you his affection.
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canmom · 26 days ago
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art shit, (while two days off ssris and facing an impending move so expect a certain skew). no sympathy needed or expected, i just need to get this out somewhere so i can do something else but wallow in it
consciously i believe the only good reason to create art is to intrinsically fulfil some personal emotional need. i don't want to be too prescriptive about what that might be; but joy, venting, expressing affection, some kind of spiritual drive, a relationship i can't imagine...
unfortunately it seems that my own feelings about my stuff are very much shaped by extrinsic desires which are essentially impossible to fulfil, primarily living up to the example of xyz other person. the writers and visual artists i admire the most are creating the kind of thing that is true to them and their experience of the world; inevitably they will do things that i cannot, and i will inevitably be inspired by them, but it would do none of us any good if i just tried to imitate them, trying to do their thing but not as well. but it almost seems like heresy to imagine that i also have things that are good about what i do (or even have the potential to do) that charity or frog or jackie or seth dickinson or shinya ohira or shintaro kago or weilin zhang or yoko taro or (...) couldn't do.
anyway i end up simultaneously desperate for praise and also unable to appreciate it for long when i receive it. hell it's worse, when i don't get praise (either at all or from xyz person), i end up feeling like i failed somehow and have to try all the more desperately on the next attempt. but i don't let myself feel satisfied when i do get praise because i have this pretty deep seated complex about not being arrogant.
so even when someone who I've spent a third of my life looking up to says i did something good, and evidently seems to like being friends with me, part of my brain says, "well, it's the kind of praise you'd give to a child isn't it, they still don't see you as a peer" - how could they after all, when axiom 1 is they're better than me? i know I'm not on their level yet, and likely won't be for years if ever, but they got where they did not by chasing after the foot of the pedestal where the good artists live, but by pursuing the intrinsic thing that motivated them in creating art through many painful and traumatic years until they reached an undiscovered corner of aesthetic space where they could say what they needed to say. and I'm hamstringing myself by staring at that distant horizon when I've made it instead of just thinking about enjoying the process right now
one of the things you develop over the course of learning visual art is line confidence. a beginner's lines tend to be shaky and hesitant or messy and missing the mark; a more intermediate artist can apply rounds of refinement to get a line that looks cleaner but still feels stiff. an experienced artist can draw a simple expressive line that captures the desired information while still feeling lively. the same is visible in for example prose.
the thing is... i don't feel confident at all, in anything. i have to push through all this anxiety to get anything done; i have no idea how to cultivate confidence except to hope it will just happen by magic if i draw enough pictures or write enough stories, but that just leaves me feeling like everything i make in the meantime is kind of grubby and shameful, which does not exactly lead to a growing sense of confidence.
the artists i admire look supremely confident; even when i see them expressing their own anxieties, i guess my brain can't get over the public performance of confidence and turns it into like, "if you can feel unsatisfied with something so magnificent, which i could not imagine being able to create, the thing you'd think is good must be impossible to imagine for the likes of me". i can see it's irrational, assuming its own conclusion even before i type it out, but it just keeps coming back like an itch
anyway this kind of thought process gets way worse when I'm off my meds so. hopefully i can get back on them and back on the ball soon. i don't know how long it will take to get good and i have to stop caring but i don't know how. i don't know how to make something that's just for me and not compulsively show it to all my friends who will listen. i don't know how to remember the good qualities of my work as well as i do the bad ones. i don't think there's any virtue in shame or honestly even humility, indeed it seems like a severe impediment to the kinds of expression that are most affecting, but it feels like these circuits are worn so deep into my brain that I'm afraid I'll never break out
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ofgentleresolve · 4 months ago
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*brings cart full of these*: @ @ @ @ @ @ @
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positivity for now bc i hate it when ppl say good vibes only ( ft. positivity meme ) || still accepting!
for every ‘@’ sent (anon or not) I WILL mention and post some positivity about a fellow tumblr user
fjskdlfjl thank you so much anon!!
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okay!! so alex ( @gwyynbleidd ) is always a wonderful presence on my dashboard!! i love how they aren't afraid to show they are actively interested in their mutuals, just by how they'll spam memes. also they've got an eclectic section of muses- i've never seen a selection more varying in personality, but also backstory and like genre too?? also it's cool that many of them are connected to one another- really makes them feel more real!! also alex?? wonderful personality- super chill, fun, and funny to talk with via dash comm- i also very much appreciate their philosophy on writing... and they definitely practice what they preach!!
do you want chaos? okay about a mun who likes chaos but also is like super sweet and chill? io ( @kwatregats ) was one of the first people i also interacted with when i first came back to rp and i always really appreciate how relaxed and free-flowing they are when it comes to the progression of muse dynamics!! ester is a riot and i love that she along with the rest of io's muses enjoy making trouble ic....it makes my dashboard v entertaining to watch :D
speaking of ppl who i first wrote with, i must talk about cyan ( @bloodxhound )!! ah, yes- the other one of two reasons i initially came back to tumblr rp!! first of all, ray!! i love the gruff detective man who bullies to show love :'D he's so much fun to interact with regardless of WHICH muse i pick...most of if not all of my muses at least know him to some capacity and somehow it is inevitable that ray will be bullying them to some capacity :D ( unless ur mana, mana has rights ). but cyan!! SO SWEET. SO NICE. GREAT WRITER AND ARTIST I WANNA STEAL IT- i'm really the lucky one here to be able to write and plot with her for all these years!! i can't wait to give her and ray more chaos ( or sweetness ) to mess with!!
i don't interact as much with leo ( @thereckoniing ) but what i do know is that he's really chill and supportive of his mutuals!! i appreciate the layers that taewon has to his personality and to his backstory and I can't wait to learn more about him- that and i actually really like the himbo energy that taewon exudes around like ray and mana?? great times truly!!
oh yeah!! jiwon's mun ( @interxstitial ) is also super sweet and encouraging just like their muse! we haven't gotten far into our thread yet but i already ADORE the friendship between jiwon and lamon developing...jiwon's sweetness definitely matches well so far with lam's prickliness :'D
on the note of plots and great dynamics tho- you know who's really fun to plot with? yeah that's right, alex ( @jeoseungsaja / @theimpalpable ) is a BLAST to both write and plot with!! and even though i'm throwing different muses at the same muse ( so far ), alex shows such techinque with characterizing saja in each verse that it still feels fresh each time?? reaper and calum- wow that's gonna hurt/be fun when they finally meet via erza. hyuk and patrick - YEAH THAT ALREADY GOT ME IN THE FEELS. but alex!! super sweet and patient- i definitely adore talking with them and i love how excited they get about characterizations and relationships and character development AND how supportive they are of their mutuals on dash!! it's so sweet to see and really just...comforting?? rp can feel a lil' isolating so it's always lovely to see someone who genuinely loves writing and characters for the sake of it!!
another person who's devoted to character development tho has to be lena ( @mythvoiced )!! although i haven't gotten the chance to write with her yet, i do appreciate how much thought she puts into each and every one of her characters so they feel distinct!! i also love the curiosity she shows towards her mutuals' ocs just in how she'll send them hc questions :D also she's super supportive of her mutuals and i love seeing her excitement in the tags- it makes me excited about rp too!! all in all, someone i definitely admire on my dash :D
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anfie-in-the-box · 3 months ago
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1. Depreciation
Notes
Hey there. I'm doing... not so good, to be frank. So, here is a little thing completely different from what I usually write and post here. It's for my NOvember challenge; as stated in the rules, one doesn't have to wait for November to start. If you haven't seen it yet, go check it out — here's the link! Perhaps you or someone you know might be interested and benefit from it.
。。。
My writings are worthless.
So very much I love the worlds I discover and people whose souls I get to gaze into and whose lives I'm so lucky to observe. With all my heart I want to help them be heard. These stories deserve the chance to ring out, reach someone's heart and perhaps even be imprinted in someone's mind, deeper than I could ever imagine.
My perception of visual information isn't particularly good (and my myopia isn't the only reason, not really), so it's no wonder I can't draw.
Handiwork isn't my cup of tea. I feel insecure with the scissors in my hands, or a needle with a thread, or the knitting needles, or wires, or some clay — you name it. Experience would surely make me more confident, but I don't see any way to embody my ideas like this. Not the right form, not at all.
Music stays out of my grasp, beautiful yet unreachable.
I certainly missed something or even forgot. That's all right.
After all, I love languages with all my heart. Russian, which is my native one, and the foreign languages of all kinds, although I must admit I prefer those I know, more or less, — English, Chinese, and Japanese.
I also love reading. In different languages, of course, even if my current knowledge only allows me to read in Russian and English. I admire art in most of its forms, but it just so happens it's words that affect me the most.
I, therefore, use words as well, writing down the stories I'm so lucky to know.
People like my writing. Always have; I started with fics in a fandom with a friendly atmosphere, and I found my readers, and they pointed out my mistakes, but also considered the strong points and my progress. I was supported. I am supported.
For some reason, that doesn't stop me from deeming my writing… no, not bad, this word's just not right. Of no significance and importance, I'd say. Hollow.
Whatever I write, I can't hear my own works as I hear the others' ones. I feel the story itself since it's mine, but not the words I describe it with.
It seems after all these years, I made no progress at all.
It seems I should just quit already, and that's it. Why do I make myself suffer like that?
There's no point, it seems.
A certain good person once compared it to being a blind artist or a deaf musician. Someone who's only led by their own mastership.
Can one tell I have it? I don't know. Not sure if anybody could answer that question — not readers, and not other writers, and not the jury of competitions, prestigious or not.
Even if somebody could, I doubt that would change my own opinion — or, more precisely, perception. No matter what, my writings are hollow for me. Hollow and worthless.
That is why every time I write something, it's a "NO" to my inner depreciation, loud and clear. I can't get rid of it, I've no idea how to fight it. Nonetheless, I evidently can create despite this inner invalidation.
And so, I have written this little thing in Russian and now am translating it into English.
It's not at all how I'd like it to be, and this time, it's not even what I expected to write. I rarely write about myself.
No big deal.
Maybe these words will ring out for someone else. Get a response.
Besides, is it even possible to stop entire lives and worlds when they want to be heard so much?..
Despite everything, I still write.
Despite everything, it's still me; and I'm still here.
。。。
Notes
If you ever feel something similar, I wish you strength. It takes a lot to keep going when nothing's ever satisfying.
And for what it's worth, I am proud of you, whether you have these struggles or some other, whether you're good at dealing with them or not so much. I believe in you.
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bookdragonlibrary · 8 months ago
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Truth & Lie
Few thoughts:
Duusu has he/him pronoun in French. What about your language? (Despite Tikki and Plagg, the gender of kwami seems to change from language to language)
Who bets what Juleka told the girls was Lukanette has a date at the movies? :3
Sabine and Tom at least knew each other since Tom made his first baguette! *o*
Was I the only one who thought Prince Ali won't be affected by the sphere?
The timeline: At the very begininng, Paris is calm because Gabriel is working on fixing back the peacock miraculous and since meteorite is one of the ingredients (from what I understood) it should have take some time to have some. Then, things went back to "normal" with all the akumatisation and sentimonsters we saw during the dates. First we have Marinette working on the riddles not translated by Master Fu and trying to figure out how the new miracle box works, so absorbed by her task she forgot her patrol with Chat noir and her date with Luka while Adrien has his long day as a model, patrol then and went to his fencing lesson while Lukanette is at the movies. Then Mr Pigeon is akumatised few hours after talking to Chat noir. Marinette feels the bombs explosing, run as Ladybug and listens Chat noir's message few hours before. All the different dates seem to be on different days obviously. Truth and Lies akumatisation happen on the same day. I think Jagged Stone came back to his son after Lies' akumatisation as he was faced to the lies he said along his life and decided he wanted to stop hiding from his children. What make me think of it is Truth akumatisation happened during day light and night fell when Luka went back to his boat. So the Lukanette break up could also happen after Lies akumatisation. The finale ladynoir scene didn't happen the same day than Truth and Lies since adrigami broke up days after, during their next session of fencing. I found someone who put the scenes on parallels even if the one on the boat are a little weird since there isn't Lukanette discussion before Luka's akumatisation.
The parallels: yes! There are more parallels than just the ships. Marinette is overwhelmed by all of her responsabilities just like in Game 2.0. Plus she has a boyfriend and is the guardian now and has to decipher the last coded mysteries of the grimoire. It is so time consuming she forgot her patrol with Chat noir, forgot her date with Luka at the movie once and she might have been late to the boat repetition because of it too since Adrien was already there, it can't be superheroes related. While Adrien discovers boredom when he patrols alone. He's so used to juggle with his two masks: Adrien the model and Chat noir the superhero, he don't know what to do with himself when he can't be neither of them. A theme that comes back in the art room scene when Kagami told him neither the model nor the clown is in true self, core self. They are just two different masks he wears: one because that is what his father expects of him, the other because it's freeing and stress releasing. While Adrien does have a sense of humour, he overdoes it to hide his pain and loneliness. Don't we say those who smile and joke hide the biggest pain behind it? Adrien might have an identity crisis this season and will find who he is, beside the model and the hero. Maybe our true self is the person we are when we're alone, when we don't wear social masks anymore. Then we have the parallels between Luka and Kagami, particularly with the cards at the end: Luka finds back his father, reunite with him and spend time with him at the end while Kagami, by not wanting to see Adrien anymore because he broke her trust in him, ends more alone than ever. Her mother is as abusive than Gabriel with Adrien, telling her there are activities less noble (art) than others (sword and bow fighting and practice), trying to control her even when she is akumatised. She is also friend with Marinette but has less chance to see her because they didn't have the same activities as with Adrien and they are both busy for different reasons. I just hope Kagami won't become another Chloé or Lila by becoming evil or working with Shadowmoth... But she will certainly go back to her lonely life like before we met her.
Adrigami & Lukanette: Marinette and Adrien still have old feelings for Adrien and Ladybug. It's not surprising, romantic feelings don't go away like that, even if you want to. Marinette seems more into kissing Luka than Adrien was with Kagami. No one was in the wrong. Being a superhero isn't suit for a love life. Some talk about Marinette "stalking" Adrien for watching a public documentary about his daily life... Adrien seems uncomfortable with any physical touch, from Kagami's trying to kiss the first time to his fans club as Chat noir. He is used to it as a model but otherwise he doesn't know how to respond to it. He must be so touched starve TT.TT The only difference between the end of adrigami and lukanette is Luka feels Marinette hides him something from him and she told him she can't tell him and he said to go back to him when she will be ready, not forcing her to reveal her secret. While Kagami isn't good with relationships and social skills nor is Adrien as they were both isolated since they were young. Kagami has the same feeling of Luka but confront Adrien with it, trapped it by keeping the lucky charm and has a proof he is lying to her when he said he found back the lucky charm while Kagami had it all along. That's why adrigami is more broken at the end than lukanette, it's because the love isn't the only thing to broke but also is trust.
The difference with ladynoir relationship is the two parties involved knows there are secrets and why. So it could still have trust between them. I'm happy the ladynoir dynamic is growing closer with based on trust and being best friends.
Lukagami: Those two episodes make me think Kagami and Luka are meant to each other. They both prefer blunt truth than sweet lies. Luka doesn't mind to let the girl lead the way and Kagami likes to make the first move.
Adrien and his true self: I feel like being the clown is more a coping mechanism. He's so forced to do whatever he's asked to and to be perfect for his father and his brand he acts two times goofier when he's free as Chat noir. But Kagami was right when she said his vulnerability is his true self, without the mask of the model and the mask of the clown. Just like in the umbrella scene where Marinette fell for him. With the language barrier, it seems a lot of people misunderstood Kagami's lines: when she said he's perfect, she meant perfect as he is and his true self is without any masks (nor the model, nor Chat noir, nor the clown). I know Kagami only pined him against the wall to surprise him so all of his masks will fall but she didn't know his worst fear is being trapped. No wonder he was relieved at the end...
Chat noir's sacrifice: he was in a dead end (in the middle of the sky yes) and also could feel guilty about Kagami's akumatisation and thinks he "deserves" it. Ladybug seems more sensitive of this tendency since Chat blanc (the specials and Lies).
What I like about the writing is it ends the easy writing of the triangle love, the jealousy trope and to use another relationship to forget about the previous one/old feelings. If you want to walk away from old feeligns, it's better to be alone than use someone else for it. I was happily surprise how the writers broke our expectations about those tropes. We saw the two love triangles arrived but instead of making Marinette and Adrien jealous about the new rivals, they made them their new friends at a point lukadrien and marigami also have shippers. Yes, Marinette was at first jealous of Kagami, but they became friends when Marinettes overlooked her jealousy to understand better Kagami in Ikari Gozen. Then it's not jealousy either that ended the two relationships, it was secrets and lies because they're superheroes. And they surprised us with relationships that didn't last because they can't be healthy with lies involved.
Oh do you want to see what Toulouse-Lautrec's signature (monogramme) looks like?
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His full name is Henri de Toulouse-Lautrec. First you can see the T, then the H in the middle and the L at the end. He lives at the same time that Japan opens his borders and share its culture with the rest of the world and the current artists took inspiration in its art. Toulouse-Lautrec love the aesthetic of kanji (one of the Japanese alphabet) and found it really beautiful and artistic. So he tried to put his signature into something that look like a kanji. And here we are! :)
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kayzume · a year ago
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Pairing: Android!Tendou Satori x SicklyF!Reader
Genre: Angst-ish
TW: Character Death (non gore)
WC: 1.7k
Note: Rushed...very. This is my contribution to Haikyuu HQ server collab and my very first time joining one, so I’m uh nervous af. I hope this was sufficient enough:)). Lots of talented writers and artists are participating so make sure to check the masterlist right here
Also: Mama @prismaroyal thank you so much (T^T)..what would I do without you🥺!! @shinrurie and @yacoka thanks for hyping me😳😭
Back to Masterlist
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"Is X00 ready?" your father spoke in a low voice.
He looked at you and smiled "just a little bit more my angel, dad is gonna give you the companion of a lifetime" he told you gently. 
"If I even have a lifetime dad," you told him weakly and he gave you this mourning look "y/n don't say such words!" he said to you while shaking his head. He crouched down to your level and caressed your face "I'm gonna make sure that this droid will help you recover, it's not over yet please have more faith in yourself, you'll be fine, you'll get better and-" he sighs then grasps your hands lightly "and we'll be together for a long long time."
You knew that your father was grasping on his false hopes of you getting better. If somebody looks at you in your current state they would surely figure out that your gravely ill, your skin has lost its regular healthy appearance, your eyes were sunken.Your father is a scientist, he's done a lot to help you recover. He tried inventing various ways, medicines, and such to help your gravely ill body to become healthy, but to this day, nothing. None of your father's hard work barely made an impact on you. It always ends up on him getting upset that none of them is helping until today that is.
"He's X00, he will be your companion from now on, he's modeled after caretakers and nurses I'm sure he will be a good factor for your health" your father exclaimed while smiling widely. You shift your sights from your dad to 'X00' he was tall and kind of lanky, with wild red hair and mysterious red eyes, for an android, his eyes seemed so full of life, a clear contrast from yours, which appeared lifeless even for a young girl such as yourself? he was staring at you and you felt weird, like his gaze pierced into your soul itself. Shaking the thought, you stared back at him and he blinked. Wait did he just blink? "He can- h-he blinked, at me!" you told your father incredulously, but he only laughed at your surprised reaction.
"Well of course he can, he was built to act completely human, how else would he be able to sympathize with you if he can't?" your father said in a matter-of-fact tone. "I'll leave you to him so you can get to know him" he continued not leaving time for you to say something. You sighed in defeat at the realization that you are now stuck with a mecha humanoid that's just standing there, staring at you silently. Your father must be kidding, how in the world are you supposed to communicate with a metal piece of junk. You were never a fan of technology in the first place, always believing they were a pain and they stole a lot of your father's time. You looked back at 'X00' he doesn't look half bad if you bypass his blood red eyes “You-" you tried starting, but then you started coughing vigorously, it was painful to say the least noticing bits of blood on your hanky, you decided speaking is not the best idea at the moment. He looked clearly worried and you averted your eyes in response, away from his face. You closed your eyes and faced the other side of the lab overlooking the garden, but when you opened your eyes he was there crouched in front of you, staring.
"What the fuck!" you exclaimed startled, a hand to your pounding heart.
Then suddenly you felt a hand to your head making its way to caress your cheek tenderly, it was him. He looked extremely gentle for someone who doesn't have a real heart, you happen to look away only to take notice of your hand now resting on his other hand, something you didn't even notice. You peeked at his face, he was sporting a sweet smile, and you feel the hotness creep all the way from your neck to your face. You lightly try to pull your hand back "Oh uhm give my hand back please" you squeaked. He let go of your hand and proceeded to the back of your wheelchair, slowly pushing your way out of the lab "D-do you have a name? b-besides from X00?" you asked dumbly. Of course, he doesn't, he was only activated today "How about I give you one?" He didn't answer, so you opted to stay quiet as well. How exactly is he supposed to help you when he doesn't even talk?!
Time passes by the two of you and he's slowly acknowledging you. It feels like you're teaching a chick how to speak, rather than him caring for you, it was the other way around. Every time you are to spend time with your mother and father, he would be taken away by your father's attendants, claiming that time with the family was for the family alone, you always missed the forlorn look painted in his eyes. The first time that it happened it took you solid 10 minutes to reassure him that you'd only be apart for a short while. You might not admit it to anyone, but being around him slowly makes you feel at ease and surprisingly you could feel more energy surging through your body. As crazy as it is his presence gave more to you than necessary, and you're loving every bit of it disregarding the fact that being with someone like him is impossible. He understood you and stood by you regardless of what is and whatnot. You were thankful for him being a shoulder to lean on and just for being your friend.
Today, you and X00 will be picking out some flowers. Your mother had said that the air outside mixed with the flowery aroma will help you breathe better and upon hearing such, X00 ushers you both out immediately, you have regained your footing all thanks to X00. Though he barely speaks he always makes your day by humming a specific tune, It was your inspiration to be able to walk again, to be able to dance along with his beautiful music. You knew in the short time that you were together that something changed, you weren't able to pinpoint what it was exactly, but it's definitely there looming over you.
Some things were starting to feel different, the innocent looks turned to something more when it's just the two of you, for you at least. You try to brush off the feelings evidently growing on you as time passes by, you always have to remind yourself "y/n he's a metal junk, he doesn't do feelings" after you're mini realization you fought back the forthcoming tears, but to no avail. You looked up at the sky, asking whoever was up there in heaven, "why me, why us?"
"I" he started, making you look at him "Hmm?" You urged him to continue
"I want...I want a name" he said. The gesture stirred something heart-warming in your chest, but before you could even give him a response, you felt a sudden chill in your back and slowly you feel your world begin growing dark.
Murmurs, murmurs, and more murmurs. You can hear voices but all words seem to be incoherent.
"How is she?" a voice you recognized as your mother's, you can already imagine her pacing around the room by the sound of her concerned voice. She was the type to fret over everything.
"It's not looking good" you presume was your father's, as he gave an exasperated sigh. You thought why was everyone so gloomy? what is happening?
You slowly opened your eyes to the blinding white lights "ugh" you let out in pain. Why does everything hurt? What is with all these tubes and wires stuck on you? You know what was going on. Deep down you knew, but you decidedly keep on rejecting the idea of you passing. You thought if you leave now, how is he gonna keep going, and for what? The thought of him made you snap. 
"WHERE IS HE?!" you screamed startling your parents.
"y/n calm down, sweetie," your mother said while rubbing your back to calm you down "stressing will only make things worse, hmm" as if on cue you felt a sharp pang course through your body "Argh!" you yelped in pain, "hah..hah...hah" you started breathing heavily, the pain is starting to become unbearable, "Mom it hurts...so much" you clung to her as if it will make things any better. Your face is scrunching in pain, tears are starting to sting your eyes. Your mother was cradling you in her arms, you can feel her shaking. She was crying silently and it makes things extra clear for you, This is the end.
You calmed yourself down and pulled away from your mother. You looked her in the eyes and stated "I want to see him, mom, for the last time, please" you pleaded with her. She kissed your forehead and gave you a comforting hug. You both knew that this meant goodbye and it was hard to let go. Your father couldn't stand to look at you so helplessly that he decided to leave without saying goodbye. It was for the best you thought. The door screeched open, he stood before you. He looks forlorn as if something was taken away from him. "Come" you signaled him to come closer, he scooted next to you. You caressed his face, memorizing every inch, "I- I want you to remember that even though it was only a  short period of time that I was with you, I have loved every single aspect there is about you. I remembered you stating that you wanted a name, hmm, your name shall be Tendou because you were heaven's grace to me" you whispered. "You may not be able to feel love, but remember that this heart has only beaten for you." you continued leaning close to put his hands near your heart, with a longing look you placed a loving kiss on his forehead.
You gave him one last smile, "Farewell, Tendou"
Tendou cradled your lifeless body against his, berating himself over not being able to shed a tear. Deep inside him he was praying, “In our next life we’ll be together, I promise” feeling the heaviness in his heart “I loved you too”
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maivalkov · 8 months ago
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I have seen not long ago a post about "spain's dark side" so...your opinion about that? (I kinda have a feeling of knowing why himaruya came up with that and, if I am right, I am not sure if I like it. It's not that I don't like the dark side thing, but if the reason is what I think, then I don't fancy it)
Great question! Please excuse the length of this response in advance, and if I go off on any tangents. To directly answer your question: I have a horrible feeling that Dark Spain is inspired by the Spanish Black Legend/La leyenda negra, and I don't like that at all. You've really hit on an important topic here, so I'm going to extend this discussion. I call this upcoming piece: Why I don't like Dark Spain and why we, as fans and creators, need to be mindful of how we enjoy our beloved series.
Side note before we begin: I'm going to be talking from a writer's perspective, since this is what I mostly do. My opinion is just that, nothing more. Some will agree with me, others won't, and that's okay. If you're happy with the terms, let's crack on.
Part 1: "Dark" characters I'm not against 2P or "dark" versions of a character if it's required for a particular setting. Let me show you what I mean, using some fic plots I just pulled from my head: Example one: You've got this gritty, fantasy gangster city plot. You use a real city as your location, but the characters are human. Antonio's the leader of a huge criminal organisation and therefore he will do incredibly bad things. It's trigger warnings ahoy. Is this portrayal okay? Sure. (read on before you hit that reply button) Example two: You're writing a horror fic. Antonio's a sexy merman who's more likely to decorate his cave with your entrails, than serenade you on a beach. Is this plot fine? Absolutely. It's dark af, but you're writing sexy merman horror. It kinda’ comes with the territory. Did you see how I wrote "fantasy" and "human" in bold? And did you see that I used Antonio, not Spain? There's a reason. I personally believe in this: When your story uses Hetalia characters in their human form (i.e: Antonio is just Antonio, he does not represent Spain), there's much more freedom and flexibility. I've read many excellent works with darker themes who use real locations alongside human versions of the characters, and do so brilliantly. They're wonderful stories, and they don't cause harm. They're fiction. Fantasy. Fiction. Did I mention fiction? On the flip side: When we are writing the characters as country personifications, who represent the people and the history, we must take proper precaution. The same applies to writing about historical events. (To be continued down below.)
Part 2: Dark Spain
As someone who's been in fandom 10+ years now, my problem with Dark Spain is this: a number of creators back in the old days seemed to agree with my Black Legend theory/concerns, and yet they willingly made content for it. Not everybody did this, but I certainly saw some who thought "wow dark crazy Spain because Inquisition", applied it to certain ships because "ohh angst leads to romance, what a plot" and that is wrong on so many levels. If you know the Spanish Black Legend, then you know how bad this is. It's an incredibly difficult topic because it is, in the simplest sense, massive propaganda designed to seriously damage a country's image. I welcome Spanish input on this, but personally I think using this as some edgy portrayal of Antonio in your fics is insulting. Don't bloody well do it.
(Please note that the fandom is MUCH better now, but it doesn't change the fact it has, and could still happen. I used past tense for a reason, as I do think things are improving.)
Russia is another character which suffers this treatment, and I do think we have a responsibility to be considerate. Many countries have done awful things, mine (the UK) included, and yet our characters have escaped receiving this Dark persona. It's not fair, it really isn't. It's a poor judgment call on Himaruya's behalf if my theory is true. If I'm wrong, then this argument is void. Either way I feel like Himaruya should've specified how and why Dark Spain came about. Part 3: Historical writing
Here's where it gets interesting. I'm not saying "don't write historical hetalia fanfiction", and I never will say it because historical fiction exists. You can go in your local bookshop and boom, people are making real money off it.
I'm not one of those lucky sorts, but I am contributing to that genre myself. Despite lots of magic, fantasy and general artistic license, my story Gatito can be considered historicaI.
It's set in England, 1569. Spain and the Netherlands are two of the main characters, and yes, their conflict is referenced. It coincides with the timeline, and all the while I write them as personifications, I can't pretend that tension between them doesn't exist. If I did, that'd probably be even more insulting to their history, and no doubt confusing for the reader.
The main plot is a daft mash of Arthur misusing his magic, a vile fictional man from Antonio's court who wants his head, and poor Netherlands and Portugal get wrapped up in the drama along the way.
The Dutch conflict is featured, but not the plot. The event is occurring right in the middle of a fictional disaster which Antonio is trying to overcome. It's acknowledged, but it's on the side, to put it simply.
I use human names (Antonio and Abel) and explore that situation from an emotional, human perspective. I do not claim that Abel is a victim, and no one thinks he is either. Personal HC time here: I don't think any of the characters look back at their history and think "wow, poor me". Everyone's made mistakes, and they've all played a role in hurting someone else. My history teacher once told me this: The more you look, the more you see. There's many sides to a story, and even to this day, I doubt historians have truly, faithfully documented events so that it's fair on every nation involved. That's why we need to try and learn history from multiple perspectives, and why when writing hetalia characters during a historical event, we should show the reader as many viewpoints as possible. If you don't, then... well. I frown at you. More on this in part 4.
Part 4: Conclusion/advice
I won't pretend to be a saintly figure in the fandom, and this rant is a bit of a mess, but I hope you get what I'm on about. Thank you if you're still reading.
I'm going to finish with a bit of advice that has helped me have a positive time, and allowed me to create works for a series I really love:
1- If your story is historical, and you purposely want to paint a country in a bad light, think before you do. Don't slander another country for the sake of your comfort character or ship. If your story is set during a battle then yes, they can moan about the opposition, but don’t go hardcore. You know what I mean.
2- Research, research, research.
3- You want to write a particular character. Their human name is unconfirmed, or you don't know a part of their history, but you want to write about it. What should you do? Talk. I had this very dilemma regarding Portugal's surnames, and I just asked Portuguese mutuals on Tumblr for help. I received numerous valid responses in under an hour, and I felt better for it. 10/10 highly recommend.
4- If you've gotta' write Dark Spain: Keep. It. Fictional. If you don't believe my theory behind it, cool, crack on. But if you agree with me, then yeah, I've said it enough. Respect the country.
5- DO explore history. It's fascinating.
6- If you write historical hetalia and you feel that something might be misunderstood: PLEASE USE DISCLAIMERS, END NOTES ETC. I write number 6 from experience. There is a scene in Gatito where a significantly stressed Antonio attempts to summarise the Dutch conflict. He's being blamed for countless fictional issues, and rather than think things through, he blames himself for Abel's pain as well. He does it on a purely emotional basis. Have you ever had that really bad day, and things keep getting worse? Someone comes along and says "you did x y z and I'm mad", and rather than argue your side, you accept it?
That's Antonio in that scene. I know it is, because that's how I intended it to be read. His answer is flawed, to say the least, but in his human heart, he can't help it. I used the end notes as a warning/apology/explanation for this scene. I don't want it to be misinterpreted, and I don't want to disrespect Spanish history.
7- If someone does comment/ask about a sensitive, historical part of your work: don't rant. And don't get offended. I believe we all need to talk more. Have conversations about HCs, how we would write/imagine different scenes, and use it to improve your work.
8- Have fun, and be sensible. Thank you again for reading, I hope this helps to some extent. I know I've thrown my opinion out here, but if you strongly disagree with me, don't @. Move on, embrace what you believe, and everyone's a winner. (This really should've been number 9 on the list haha.)
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herlocksholmes1888 · a year ago
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Things I Watched/Listened/Read These Past Few Days
So, I had a rather stressful month due to an assignment deadend - things are ok now - and I have decided I would watch or read or listen to any media I could, at least once a day, to cool down.
The movies on this post are the ones I watched to cope with the stress. I will be talking more about them as each of them go, if I liked them or not and etc. This is not a critical post, though, it's more... idk personal.
1. The Secret of Kells
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It is Cartoon Saloon's first movie ever. It's story is simple and you may not understand the importance of the Book of Kells without some historical background, but you will be able to enjoy it either way. My favorite scene is when Aisling starts singing and aaaaaaa it's too much. Gorgeous.
My only problem though... was that one black character's design. It seemed too close to the Black FaceTM. I got kinda turned off by it.
2. Wolfwalkers
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Yeah, I know, I know I should have watched it in a manner to support the artists the way they deserve to be supported and I really wish I could have done that. Either way, it is a beautifully animated film and to anyone able to afford Apple TV+, I highly beg you to support this movie and watch it. There is a HEART to it, a soul I've been missing in animated movies and only occasionally see.
You may think you figured out the entire plot from the trailers, but there is one aditional plot tied to it involving Mébh and I enjoyed the surprise of it. The movie is beautifully animated, I love the accents the characters have even if I need to force myself more to understand them - you see, I am not a native speaker and always listened more to a 'standard' american accent so hearing irish for the first time was hard. I figured it out though!! Am really proud.
Pleasepleaseplease support this movie is what I'm saying.
3. Ponyo
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IT'S SUCH A CUTE STUDIO GHIBLI MOVIE I SHOULD HAVE WATCHED IT SOONER AJSJDJEJEWJD
I wish we could have known more about Ponyo's family, but other than that I really enjoyed seeing what happened on-screen and how it was delivered. It's a cute tale. Manages to be creative and simple at the same time??? Don't expect much more than cute and simple and GORGEOUSLY ANIMATED though
4. The Old Guard
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Listen, I know they did it very differently than the comics - but sometimes you just want to see some immortal gays being badass you know :,)
It's hard to point what I love more about the movie. Cinematography, the creative idea (although we should thank the comic writers for that), the characters, their struggles, representation and they even ground the immortality superpower. I don't know how they do that but every action scene is tense even if you know they can not die. You just wonder if they will be ok. I don't know how they did that!
5. Oliver Twist (2005)
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I do not know the public reception of this, but I have been curious as to Oliver Twist since I heard of Disney's Oliver and Company inspiration. Therefore, once Prime added it then the oportunity came and I really liked it. I know it is narrated with a humorous tone but I do feel like it's descriptions of the horrors the main character faces were all right, I might as well have learned something.
It follows what many already know as the book - I haven't read it personally, therefore I do not know if it is a trustworthy adaptation - and we have Edward Hardwicke. Just. Edward Hardwicke.
6. The Mystery of the Sleepy Hollow
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I did enjoy this movie, doesn't mean I liked everything about it. I did think the main character jumped into conclusions often, as if the script could not decide if he should be competent or incompetent and it really bothered me. I do am a sucker for a mix between horror and mystery, though, and thus did not mind watching this one at Halloween night.
Also, main character passes out at least 4 times in this thing - can you see this is based on gothic literature yet?
THE DECAPITATIONS THO JAIDBEIEMGKEKENFWJW THE BODIES LOOKED LIKE LITTLE AMONG US DEAD CREWMATES SJEKEKWKEKRKEKRKKRKE
7. BBC Radio 4's "A Study in Scarlet"
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It's a nice adaptation with many aditional moments that really warm your heart. Reading Holmes being excited is one thing - listening is a whole other and I love how his voice sounds in this one. He speaks fast but it's easy to understand and hIS TONE OF VOICE IS HIGHER THAN YOUR USUAL ADAPTATION, LIKE WATSON CONSTANTLY POINTS OUT IN THE BOOKS
Stamford gets aditional moments aswell, and they are great.
8. Upside Down
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I have been curious about this movie since my father watched it back in 2013. I remembered the name and the basic premise for all these years - because I thought it was unique. I never watched it before because I thought it would be a cheesy romance movie bUT-
It has an unique worldbuilding and I love it. I even liked how the camera angles made me kinda umconfy because can you imagine talking to someone who's upside down LMAO. It's world have limits too, and I really appreciate that.
I simply did not understand how can someone get pregnant in Eden's situation but 😳 who am I to question 😳. I also wish Eden could have had more of a presence too, like I wish I could have seen more of her even with her amnesia :( I felt she had one of the weakest characterizations. I wish we could have seen Adam and Eden talking to each other more, seeing they slowly grow into lovers. I also didn't like how much exposition it had as well, like I did not understand the first 5 minutes of the movie at ALL.
Still enjoyed it tho. It's just... kinda average but thats ok i guess
9. Bojack Horseman S04EP09 “Ruthie”
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Massive comfort episode! I must have watched Ruthie more than any other Bojack Horseman episode, to be honest.
This episode is just a huge bad day for Princess Carolyn and the way she copes with it and how it is incorporated into the story is... beautiful and tragic. I love Princess Carolyn-centered episodes, and even though this one isn't compared to the trend this series has of making a fantastic Episode 11 for each season, it is still enjoyable and sad. That and I did have a small giggle at the miscarriage jokes, I'm so fucking sorry.
10. Brooklyn 99 Pilot Episode
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(Of course this image is not from that episode I just find this scene funny)
I had watched Brooklyn 99 before - but it's been a long time since I've seen the first episode that ever aired. I really enjoyed it and it did make my mother and I chuckle a little bit.
God, I need to keep up with this series again; it's been such a long time since I stopped watching due to stress getting in the way lmao
Part 2 will come as soon as I finish another 10 days 😊
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shaolin-spin-doctor · 4 months ago
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I saw your review post then the immediately Kung Lao in heart sunglasses post and I'm like yeah yeah. After all that you need to look at something that brings you joy and calms your anger.
See, I wasn't even that heated about it at the moment. Partly because of how down the movie made me feel right after, and partly because I was sort of waving off my anger under the excuse of "You're just mad because of Lao's death, it probably wasn't that bad". However, now that the initial general disappointment wore out and I've thought more and more about it, I've come to realize the mistreatment of Kung Lao (and other characters) is a major sign of this movie's issues, and why it leaving a bad taste in my mouth isn't just me being biased. Hell, I've even come to the conclusion that Lao's death - couple of seconds of being alive after getting torn in half and all - could've actually been an AMAZING part of the movie if handled correctly, as shocking and confusing as that sounds, and I'm debating about whether or not I should make a post talking about it.
On a similar note, I've also come to realize the people working on this movie - and the film itself - never really had a chance. Looking at details like promo'd characters that never appeared, the animation team not getting basic design notes that should be a must in every production, the seconds long fights with just okay-ish animation... this project just reeks of a problematic, messy, chopped up production, and I have a sneaking suspicion it was originally supposed to be two films that got hurriedly smushed together at some point during development due to time constraints, corporate meddling, or both, if the hamfisted finale is anything to go by. A year to make an hour and twenty minute long animated movie from scratch isn't a very forgiving timeframe, either. Some of these issues were even apparent in the trailers, but most of us consciously ignored the red flags because we trusted this would turn out alright, and well. That was a bad decision.
At this point, more than angry, I'm disappointed and sad for the people who worked on this and genuinely wanted it to succeed. I can't even bring myself to be mad at the writers, seeing how they might've had a different vision that ended up becoming severely crippled to save time and money, something that usually happens because of corporate interference and their lack of willingness to support artists. Or maybe they just genuinely suck at plotting and scriptwriting, I don't know. Either way, like I said, when you take everything into account... this film's chances to be dead on arrival were incredibly high.
good thing the amazing people in the mk fandom are there to draw kung lao with heart glasses and make dumb memes to cheer everyone up from this mess
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jjiimin · 3 months ago
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stepping away from tumblr, going on hiatus are best moves you can do. i love your writing I swear but I feel you're swamped with these overexpectations you have. you say you don't get engagements but I see people engaging with your fics compared to other fics where there are little notes, no comments.
I hope you can find it in your heart to write and just enjoy the process. the heart of it all is to write and have people read and get affected by one story right? it's like music too. if you are putting out music just for the sake of getting popular, 1M sales, and all other numbers - then just stick with shallow content. quick and easy bucks. But yours are very deep and well developed plotlines. It takes a real reader to appreciate and go through the fics too. I see a lot of these kinds of readers engaging and I hope you appreciate them more. If you want quick notes, then stick with pwp over 2K. I've always admired people like bts whose heart is so focused on just getting their music out. that's their core, the numbers just follow.I hope one day, you'll feel more comfortable w that approach too and not get too lost with reaching for that elusive notes. honestly large number of notes does not guarantee great writing.
I will miss you but I think it is better this way too. I wish you good luck with everything and I hope you get to that point where writing is just satisfying as it is. IF not, then I hope you will find that one thing that will be source of this satisfaction.
Take care
reply under the cut because my goodness, did this message irk me.
Look, I can tell this message was sent with good intentions but you’re coming off extremely rude. To compare my desire to receive more engagement on my fics to bts’ ‘core’ ideals is incredibly unhelpful and lame. You do realize bts get paid millions upon millions of dollars, right? And I don’t get paid a cent? How can you compare two vastly different things? No offence, but you must be a child to think people’s core values are always the driving force behind what they do. Because yeah, bangtan’s ‘core’ values are the reason why they release trashy English songs like Dynamite, collaborate with western artists, and sell $200 t-shirts. The numbers don’t ‘follow’—people actively ENGAGE with their material and they climb up the social and economic ladder as a result. As someone who has watched bangtan since shortly after debut, I can promise you that if their ‘core values’ (as you claim because who knows if it’s even true) were the only thing behind their music, they would never have reached the height of fame they’re at now. Don’t delude yourself with thinking their inner goodness would have resulted in the kind of fame they’re now experiencing. The world does not work this way.
Now, to address your concern with me:
Never have I ever claimed the desire to be famous. I write fic for fuck’s sake. I wouldn’t want to be famous for something like this anyways. What I have asked for is the desire to receive engagement with what I work my arse off to create. There is nothing wrong with wanting to hear ‘good job’ or ‘this was good’ by someone who consumes your art.
If you were a writer, you would understand me. But it’s clear that you have never created anything in your life. You don’t know what it’s like to put in the effort to create something for others and receive crickets in return. If I didn’t care about receiving feedback nor commentary, I never would have posted a single fic online at all.
I will agree with you that there are at least a few people who do regularly reblog and comment on my fics. And I appreciate them all the time with private messages (which you obviously don’t know about) and dedications on my fics. I don’t ignore them. I love these readers and a few of them are friends I’m very thankful to have. I love them.
What my issue is, is that I think it’s unfair for me to work so hard and beg to receive reblogs and/or comments from people who willingly and regularly give it to other writers. It hurts me deeply. Especially when these same readers express interest in being added to tag lists or request fics and give me absolute silence in return. Why are you asking to be on my tag list when you can’t do something as simple as reblogging my fic? Why is it possible for you to write dissertations on other fics but not mine? Do you know how much that hurts to see? Why do you think I’m not good enough to be granted the same appreciation/love?
I’ll agree with you on the fact that comparison is a horrible thing. I do it too often, I know. But I’m human. I’m a girl who has a ton of growing up to do. I will probably deal and struggle with this my entire life. That’s fine. It’s a part of life. But that doesn’t mean I can’t vent about it when I want to. I’ve complained about not receiving engagement for months, but despite this, I still write and I still make posts and I move on. I’ll do that this time around, too.
I need you to understand something: it’s not notes I care about. It’s simple kindness. That’s all. To me, it’s important to appreciate someone who gives you something. But I get it, I can’t expect the world to adhere to what I think is right. That’s something I need to learn and understand on my own.
Thank you for sending me this message, but please understand that I am not a robot. I’m a human being who is going to be sad and shitty sometimes. I’ll have bad days. This week has been particularly difficult for me and I looked towards my fic blog for the happiness I haven’t been receiving irl. That was wrong of me, I get it. But I also hope you can understand that it’s not wrong of me to want to feel appreciated for my hard work.
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thefandomlesbian · 7 months ago
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Pride Month Prompt List: Lesbian Lyrics
For this pride month, send me a quote of one of these lyrics with a ship, and I'll write a short inspired by the phrase. (Other writers: Feel free to reblog! Just please don't repost.)
And I obviously recommend all of these songs and their artists! Support a lesbian musician this pride month.
The nightmares howl and moan; she wakes me up and reminds me I'm home. -"It's Her Love," Mary Gauthier
It should've been easier, us three: Our old friend Fear, and you and me. -"Glycerine," Melissa Ferrick
I realized my heart had abducted my mind. They were last seen headed south. -"Don't You Need," Melissa Etheridge
Somewhere between Cain and Able, that's where we live. It's only human to take more than you give. -"Walking Each Other Home," Mary Gauthier
I'm crashing through clouds I used to walk on, reaching out for unfamiliar hands. -"Soft Place to Land," Mary Gauthier
Forty years of push turns into a shove. -"Snakebit," Mary Gauthier
We haven't even gotten started yet. I haven't even tied you up. -"Drive," Melissa Ferrick
Everything I need is right here in my hands. -"Everything I Need," Melissa Ferrick
You can't get your hands inside me, treating me like that. "Falling On Fists," Melissa Ferrick
They're from a different town, and they've got a different last name, but we've got the same lonely frown. -"Massive Blur," Melissa Ferrick
My thoughts are all jumbled into some crazy state of grace, and what do I do but soothe it with a picture of your face? -"Til You're Dead," Melissa Ferrick
A tethered bird to a tethered cage: I sing to you to feed the dream. -"Shadows on a Dime," Ferron
I say, hello, there, brittle and bone. For sure, you must be my home. -"Almost Kissed," Ferron
Rain upon the water makes footprints sunk in sand. Anger upon angry hurt, take me by the hand. -"Girl on a Road," Ferron
First comes the kiss. Then comes the hands too hot to touch. Feeling like this, I want to be with you so much. -"Alice Says Yes," Ferron
She told me about a silver lake tucked tight behind a rock face. Your basic demons tell you fools come late. -"Venus As Appearances," Ferron
They say love travels blind. How come I still see myself with you whenever I look behind? -"As Soon As I Find My Shoes, I'm Gone," Ferron
I'd rather take chances than be on my guard. That side of the moon is too dark. -"That Side of the Moon," Tret Fure
Now it takes a vacation to hold each other close, because when I go to kiss you, I kiss a wet puppy nose. -"Doggone Blues," Tret Fure
The moonlight shimmers through the reeds. I breathe the air that warms my soul. I turn to find you next to me. -"Look What Love Has Given Me," Tret Fure
You know forever's still far away, and I love you more now than yesterday. -"My Love For You," Tret Fure
The world news is bleak, the apathy bleaker. There's a promise of peace called war. -"Nothing Can Harm Our Love," Tret Fure
I was minding my own business, chasing demons in my head, while the devil was afoot, feeding off the dead. -"Always, Forever, and Now," Tret Fure
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i-lino · 10 months ago
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Each person has a different perception in anything. Everyone has a taste that can vary from other. Like in terms of preferred food, clothing, hobby and more to mention. I would like to talk about music and how this specific type of music helped countless of people. So sit back and enjoy reading this blog ;)
To open this topic, Korean Pop or commonly known as Kpop had captured millions of listeners for the past 10 years (almost) and the number of people being exposed to this genre is still unexplainable until now. Old and legendary kpop boy groups like BigBang and others should be mentioned here, since these groups opened up the lineup for the "first known kpop boygroups". But, as we all know, korean group BTS did paved the way for this genre to be completely exposed in international market. I still remember how they won the Billboard Music Awards last 2017 and being the first group to perform a korean song in western music award shows. Those were indeed the legendary times and many groups actually acknowledge the phrase "BTS paved the way". Following that year, many groups have the opportunity to be well-known even to non-korean listeners. One of that groups, is Stray Kids, which probably the most anticipated 4th generation group that will lead the Kpop scene. Driven by passion and talents, they are not just serving satisfying performance, but also comfort to their listeners. And by how, you asked? Of course, it's through their music and lyrics.
Stray Kids is a South Korean boyband formed by JYP Entertainment that started in March 18, 2018.
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I feel like as you read this, you might think 'oh, another kpop group, it's not like I care whatever their details might be', let me stop you right there. Stray Kids or SKZ might be your 'common kpop group' but there are countless things that are pretty unique to this group. The members, are actually self-picked by their leader. Yes, like every groupings back on normal school setting, when the assigned leader picks his desired members, SKZ was form just like that. The company entrusted a group in a 20-year-old boy (he's 23 now). Entertainment companies on SoKor (South Korea) usually create groups according to the company's plan so Stray Kids having that title is quite unique.
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But the best characteristic that they have is they are a self-produced group. If you are wondering what is self-produced, it basically means they produce/write their own music. For those people who are not familiar on how music industries work, not all artist write their songs. They have someone, like producers and song writers to write for them. But Stray Kids have the means and ability to participate in creating their own discography. In short, they insert their own stories, experience and ideals to the song itself. Nothing is more comforting than to a song that can deliver real and inspiring messages that you can actually relate to.
Here are some lyrics created by Stray Kids themselves :
"Just cuz someone’s ahead doesn’t mean they’re first, look at the big picture and take your time. No need to rush, my pace. Don’t compare. It’s alright to go slowly. Go on your own path, my lane. Put down your impatience. Just keep looking forward."
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The song "My Pace" delivers the message of leading your life the way you wanted it. People often compare themselves in terms of success or ability and even appearances. This song tells the listeners that it is your life for you to control using your own speed and pace in your own lane.
"It’s not hard, in this rough jungle. It was me who ran into it, I’m okay"
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The word 'MIROH' came from the Korean word '미로' that means maze. The song is encouraging the listeners to be confident in their decision in life and they should not regret any choice that they make. In life, we might enter a stage where we have to take risks. Visualizing the problems in life as the 'rough jungle' and jungles could be a maze, right? This song can also be a go-to song since this is really upbeat and energetic.
"Later when I got addicted to life"
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From the song 'Mixtape #1', this might be a short lyrics and it is barely a sentence, but it implies that there are more things to look forward in life. There are beautiful things to see and do in this world that you can commit to. This simple line is telling the listeners that there is hope in life and there are more to life than problems and sadness. Ending it too soon would be a waste.
"I realize that I can fly. I needed to find me (Now I know). The key was inside of me all along. I'm listening to my heart, let it guide me. I feel the light, I feel the light. It's all good now"
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'Levanter' that means a strong easterly wind in the Mediterranean signifies that in order to continue in your path in life, it's important to follow your heart. It's about reaching for that something or goals but the song made the listeners realized the goal doesn't matter anymore since the most important thing is discovering yourself.
"I'm always looking for my way with the blueprint. The answers the world has given to me are wrong. I always dream of my blueprint coming true. I'll proudly achieve my dream. My future is bright"
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'Blueprint' tells us how the world and people will discourage you and sometimes how will they look down on you. Still, you should follow your wants and plans, like a blueprint of a building. Yes, it will be a hard road ahead and you will meet many obstacles ahead but working hard is the best cup of revenge to those who have the guts to discourage you.
Six out of 80+ songs and one theme that they have is spreading youth empowerment. Mostly produced by Stray Kids themselves specifically the three members (Bang Chan, Changbin and Han). Their whole discography mainly focuses in encouraging youth that are closer to their age range to be themselves, to live their life to the fullest and to remind everyone that everything will be alright at the end of the day. There are also songs that can be said through simple words like 'I love you' or 'I can't live without you' but they widen their expression and understanding like for example :
"Even a fool knows this. You're the best thing I've got. Once again towards you. One more step, I will never stop" - Mixtape: On Track
"I search for you in our broken memories. Even when I grasp one, all I remember is your tears. I must have really lost my mind. I’m not sure if I can take all this time without you, in the end you’re all I had" - Ex
"The second hand runs like a crazy horse, take me now. Staying alone, and the saying ''enjoy the past''. Don't do it, I feel alone. I don't want to be left alone miserably and fall behind. Take me to you now" - Slump
They also express the struggles of having an unexplainable feelings like the frustration of growing up, frustration of being a youth, and even how you felt of not finding your goal :
"I swallow pills called baseless confidence. Maybe I took them so many, now that I’m feeling worried than confident. Everything is being changed, from 1 to 10. The side effects kicking in against my will" - Side Effects
"When the new semester started and I gathered all my books. I used to think it's too heavy and put it down in front of the classroom. Now that I'm an adult, responsibilities are even heavier. I'm not ready, only filled with worries" - Spread My Wings
"I'm still young so I don't know what I want to do. Don't say 'don't do this or that' because I want to do it more. Don't say 'don't go there' because I want to go there more Who am I, what do I want? Who am I? Why am I getting curious about this? The photo I uploaded last night and me. In reality, which one is the real me?" - Question
And there are some songs that brings comfort by means of words and simple phrases, associated by soft melodies and sentimental tunes :
"You fell down, it’s alright, I’ll pick you up. Did you worry a lot? No no no, it’s your first time. That’s ok, everyone does that. That’s how it is, even adults made mistakes. Practiced and grew when they were our age. There’s still so many firsts for us. It’s alright, we just need to go through it and grow, don’t cry" - Grow Up
"Small things are spectacular sights. A gift given by God. Nothing's lacking, I'm satisfied. This is getting cool. Kicking the leaves in the autumn breeze. Don't forget about the sound they make. Doesn't matter if the world is a cold place 'cause I'm getting cooler'' - Get Cool
"This year is ending anyway. Stop saying ''back in my days''. I can't stand it anymore. You're doing this because of worries. But trust me once. I'll take responsibility for the future. Let me be myself." - Gone Days
This blog is clearly not intended to force the dear readers to check out Stray Kids but instead, to deliver the messages of what the songs are trying to tell. Stray Kids has a lot of potential in making their own content and it is a relief they are allowed to participate in writing/producing songs. It is indeed that the music industry is just their playground. But beyond that amazing title, what remains the most essential is their love for telling stories, experience and morals through their music. The important thing is helping out those who need help that can eventually surpass the barrier called language.
— end
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